#magic brocolli

[purpleender29]

[quailxcrossing]

thinking about some of my babies

these three are invading my thoughts so heavily recently and i am figuring out their childhood secrets, slowly but surely.....

Valkyries can be born from any home, and since there's a limited amount that can exist at any time, they're only born in some period after a previous one passes! Esperanza was born in a small home out in the desert boondocks outside of Turquoise Springs, to a family who had a stain on their name since her father was known for pulling terrible business buying and reselling property. no one liked him bc he was basically a fantasy airbnb flipper and sucked ass

and once Esperanza's Valkyrie tells appeared when she was a few years old (mostly the random wings tbh) her parents thought she would be their big break and finally earn their family some respect, since the reputation of the Valkyries was very well-known!! they hoped their baby would at least bring some good luck! she hadn't gotten her card pulled yet so they didn't know she was The Lovers yet, butttt they could've probably guessed seeing that position had recently been opened.....

Esperanza liked the bigger village a lot, but to her family's disappointment, she HATED people knowing she was a Valkyrie. they always treated her weird.....Valkyries (to keep things brief) are basicallyyyyy just. very densely magical creatures. their connection to the cards and fate is very strong, very closely tied to the world's religion, so people treated Esperanza with almost too much respect that this little baby wanted. she really wanted to make friends with other kids, and she was excited a big village meant she could go to school normally! she took to going outside with her wings covered, lying to people she was just a normal human (with some impish features), which her parents HATED .. but Esperanza remained whimsical

she met Lwaukee the season before she was set to start Tuesday's equivalent of elementary. the little kitty was creeping around and scampering around the washes where Esperanza had taken to enjoy playing (kicking up dirt and running around collecting sticks. baby games) and they played silently a couple times chasing each other back and forth before Lwaukee would randomly get scared and dart off. Esperanza kept returning there hoping Lwaukee would show up.

their relationship changed drastically the time Esperanza ended up bringing a snackie- a little pouch of sun-dried chub that her family had saved up to buy from one of the market stalls (seafood is quite rare out in the desert, these chub were local tho because they lived in Turquoise Springs!!) Esperanza thought she could share them with her new buddy!! maybe they'd be actually buddies!!! her parents always said that material goods were the fastest way to a person's heart! ^D^

Lwaukee stole all of them. immedically. he ate them so fucking fast and Esperanza just went 😲🥲

then Lwaukee scampered off again

so she brought a little bit more the next time, which Lwaukee wolfed down again. Esperanza was really concerned, thinking maybe Lwaukee was homeless, or his parents didn't feed him, so she asked- and Lwaukee finally spoke to her, explaining the food at home "made him sick". Neither of them knew what it meant, but basically Lwaukee is the only cat/human in his house, and he had a combo of a strange diet + ARFID. his parents didn't know how to make him eat, since he could only stomach very certain foods without getting sick. seafood, mostly, meats, and very small portions of fruits and veggies. so basically Lwaukee's parents were going "my kid wont eat his brocolli!! tsk silly kid" while Lwaukee was dry-retching in the background, if he can manage to get it into his mouth

so Esperanza really did win his heart over with food; the two quickly become more comfortable with each other and shared their snacks and continued to play In The Ditch. you know when you just play in the ditch....real desertheads understand

they met their dear friend Georgiana when Lwaukee and Esperanza were trotting town on their way to their favorite dirt patch, and Lwaukee thought it would be a good idea to duck through the nearby marketplace (just wanted to steal some fish) (stole some fish)

Georgiana was a small single child from a fisherman's family, very sheltered just like Esperanza, but with an intense fear of outsiders. their family was all made of hunters, and living off the land was everything Georgiana knew. they lived a few villages over closer to the rivers and they only visited for markets to sell their catches. so when Lwaukee tried to grab a bass cut (Esperanza made the surprised Pikachu face) Georgiana immediately took after him- Georgi's parents told them it wasn't worth it, but Georgiana is really protective of their fishes, very proud to be working the stall...Lwaukee took off cackling but Georgiana caught him very easily. Esperanza explained the situation and apologized 500 times and...hey do you wanna play In The Ditch with us?? you look really strong! you could pick up a lot of sticks when we build forts in the ditch!

Georgiana was terrified of this approach, but they let Lwaukee keep the fish. and guess who quietly showed up next time their family was in town and Esperanza and Lwaukee were rolling in the dirt

[bonny-kookoo]

Strong Girl 🔞☁️❤️🎀

🍧 Pairing: Jeon Jungkook x Reader

🍧 Genre: Good Girl AU!, slice of Life AU, non-Idol AU, smut

🍧 Warnings: DD/LG themes, so much love it's gross istg, a home accident if that makes you uncomfortable but we aint having a full on world's end dw, hero! Reader, no other way to put it, Koo is so proud, so so proud, showers her in kisses yes please, nsfw themes because it's me what did yall think this was gonna be, finger sucking (forgive me lord for I have sinned-), reader being cute, injuries (mentioned and described), praise kink, oral (oral f. rec.), size kink, strength kink, manhandling, subspace, Dom! Jungkook, Sub!Reader, protected sex because you won’t ever catch me slip HAH!

🍧 Summary: Jungkook is not just your boyfriend- he's your absolute hero, your knight in shining armor, your protector and personal simpBodyguard when he needs to. But sometimes, even little girls can be heroes. And they always get rewarded, in the end.

This is part of the Good Girl Universe! (But can be enjoyed on its own)

Good Girl || Sweet Girl || Smart Girl || Brave Girl || Pretty Girl || Charming Girl || Enticing Girl || Bad Girl || Tempting Girl  || Strong Girl

Taglist: @sweetenedcooky @ggukkieland @btsismybias22 @darkgvk @daddypkj @flowerprincess24 @crazylittlemay @zeharilisharaban @teresaisla @tangledsparkles @dammit-jjk

The first time you said it, it made his heart beat faster.

It was on your way home from grocery shopping, a small bag in your hand as Jungkook held your hand, walking silently. You and him had been slowly but surely become a couple like the one's you always dreamt of being when you were younger- the one that fought sometimes, yes, but would ultimately be together at the end of the day, doing simple tasks such as what you did just now. Jungkook somehow made even boring things such as buying mere groceries interesting, not just by making fun of other customer's outfits, but also by explaining things you didn't know. He loved that he somehow made your eyes light up in wonder whenever he told you about a certain dish he could try out with a vegetable you've never tasted before. Or that awkward moment you said you hated brocolli, just so he could correct you and explain to you that no, you've eaten it a lot actually- he was just really good at making food taste how you liked it. He felt proud when you told him, with magic in your eyes, that he was incredible.

Because when you said it, he really felt like he was.

It all happened so suddenly, you didn't even notice yourself slip out of fear and shock- and even Jungkook didn't notice at first. A stray dog had walked up to you, but, contrary to all those cheesy movies where you'd pet it and it would be on its way quick after, it turned out to be not a stray at all; because the man that owned the big dog was desperately trying to catch up to it, leash in his hand- collar still attached to the hook.

Jungkook had never reacted so quickly in his life before, as he pushed you behind him, sucessfully shielding you from the violently barking saint bernard in front of him. You held onto his jacket in complete terror, mind filling with nothing but the loud barks as you were sure this was a nightmare. Don't get it wrong, you loved dogs- but this one wasn't so sweet.

"I'm so sorry!" The man yelled, slipping the collar back around his dog's neck, making it a bit tighter to make sure his pet was secure this time. "He just slipped out, are you two okay?" He said, and Jungkooks voice spoke out, calm, but firm in its tone.

"We're good, but please make sure to boy a harness or something, sir." He said, and the man apologized again, hurrying on his way while the dog still pulled violently and untamed at the leash.

"Baby? He's gone, you can let go now." Jungkook says with the hint of a smile in his voice, one that quickly vanished however once he feels you sniffling against the fabric of his jacket, as your head shook in denial. "Sweetheart I can't check up on you if you hide like this." He explains calmly, glad that your apartment building was already in sight. He knew that you had probably slipped, and he was unsure how to deal with that in public; it wasn't like he was ashamed of it, but he knew that others would judge you quick and easy, and he didn't want to push you into such a bad situation. "Can Kookie check up on you, baby? You're worrying me." He says, and at that, you slowly let go of the fabric, as he turns around. His heart clenches at the sight, tear stained cheeks and nose all red already. He quats down in front of you for a second as he rubs your arms comfortingly. "There we go, everything's fine, yeah?" You nodded after a moment, but refused to speak. "That was scary, wasn't it?" He asked, and you nodded, still quiet. "Let's go home, okay? We can continue that puzzle we've started yesterday, alright? And Miri is waiting, too!" He said, and at that, you nodded more excitedly, even though you still seemed timid.

But you still held his hand tightly, only letting go once you were in the safety of your own home- calling him your hero with a quiet voice he almost didn't catch.

Jungkook really enjoyed both sides of you.

Just like he did now, searching for the right puzzle pieces to place, silently watching your innocent, concentrated face. In a way, it was healing for him; since he never truly had a good childhood himself, this was somehow like a chance to enjoy all of these things he missed with you- a fact that made all of these experiences even more special to him. "Baby, I don't think that fits there." He chuckled, correcting your placement of a piece that didn't fit the edges of the picture it was trying to build. You huffed, before yawning, eyes glossing over with sleep. "Hm, this one is hard, isn't it?" He asked, running his hand over your head before pushing some hair behind your ear. "I think my baby needs to recharge her batteries, hm?" He asked, but you shook your head after a moment, making him raise his brow in question. "Oh really? Miri, what do you think?" He asked, the dog immediately skipping over, excited to be given attention so suddenly. She immediately went to sniff your face, making you giggle. "See! I knew she'd agree with me!" He said, and you laughed full on when the dog went to lick your cheek. "Alright then, Miri, off!" He called out, the dog immediately stopping her actions at the sound of his voice. Jungkook had been unsure on how to train a puppy at first, but overall, he'd done a pretty good job at keeping her fierce temper under control.

Even throughout her violent phase of chewing on pretty much every fucking thing.

So after making sure you were comfortable on the couch, he simply sat down at the puzzle laid out on the living room floor to continue silently. However, shuffling could be heard as he look towards the couch, where you'd previously been laid down on; your tired form talking towards him with eyes barely open. He chuckled when you simply flopped down close to him on the floor with your blanket, head on his thigh as you sighed in comfort. It was second nature to him almost, the way his hand immediately found your head, gently stroking your hair as you drifted off.

Days like this were nice, he decided.

Typically when you came home, Jungkook would greet you at least with a call. Today however, you heard nothing; something that immediately set something off inside you.

Searching for him wasn't a long process- after unleashing Miri into the apartment, you went straight into the bedroom where he's usually be if he's not feeling too well. And sure enough, there he was- weirdly pale and visibly uncomfortable, even in his sleep. Squatting down in front of the bed, you gently felt his forehead, just to simply detect that he was slightly sweating, but had no fever whatsoever. "Koo?" You asked, and he stirred a little, opening his eyes, a little red looking.

"You're home? I didn't even hear you." He said, before he ran a hand over his face. "Sorry, I think I'm coming down with something." He explained, and you nodded, simply telling him to lay back down and take it easy. You made a mental note to maybe cook something light since he never really had much of an appetite when he was sick.

"Is it just me or is it cold in here?" You asked, brows furrowed as you noticed how chilly it was inside the apartment, despite the heater being set pretty high. Jungkook simply groaned, too tired to move much as he asked you to please close the curtains. You followed his request, worried figure dissapearing out of the bedroom.

However, something didn't sit well with you.

Maybe it was a simple gut feeling, but when the night slowly crept over the town, and you were slowly growing mildly dizzy yourself, you decided to make sure that your suspicions were correct, slowly walking towards the heater in the living room. It was chilly, but the heater was set to full power. And somehow, after looking at Miri whining in her bed, aimlessly pacing around, it seemed to click inside your head.

Jungkook had been home all day since last evening.

The apartment was cold, the heater's on.

Miri was already looking just as bad- and your own headache told you that this was exactly what you thought it was.

You instantly shot up from the couch, knocking your knee into the edge of the table which made you fall- the edge of the table ripping at your skin on your arm, painfully scratching it open. But it was as if you didn't feel it. Ripping the bedroom door open clumsily, you immediately opened the window, turning the heater off, before you went to wake Jungkook- or at least, try. "Kookie! Jungkook, wake up, come on!" You begged, shaking his shoulder as he slowly somehow came to his senses. He wasn't really awake- but he wasnt unconscous either. "Fuck.." You whispered under your breath, grabbing his phone and calling an ambulance- the dispatcher telling you to try and get him outside or to a place with fresh air.

But this was Jeon-I-love-working-out-Jungkook.

There was no way you could carry him all those stairs.

So you ran out the door, uncaring to close it, and knocked at your neighbours door- a familiar face looking at you with surprise. "Y/N?" He asked, visibly stunned to see you; teary eyed, with a bleeding arm, and clearly distressed.

"Namjoon, I think we have a gas leak in our apartment.. Jung-Jungkookie- they said I should get him outside but he's too heavy-" You pressed out, last words a little unclear as you finally broke. Namjoon simply went inside to grab his shoes and keys, before he closed the door, running towards your apartment, where he instantly grabbed Jungkooks arms, trying to somehow get him on his back.

"Jesus christ how much does he fucking weigh-" He swore under his breath, until he got a somewhat secure hold on the younger boy, walking out the door while you grabbed the dog, running after the two with the puppy in your arms.

Outside, the ambulance had just arrived, immediately attending to the both of you.

Seems like you owe Namjoon twice now.

Jungkook woke up with stinging smells and bright lights around him, some birds chirping outside the opened window. His arm felt heavy, fingers tingling slightly, and as his eyes adjusted to his new surroundings, he saw the cause of it.

You, with a bandaged arm, sleeping with your hands grasping his in your slumber.

He gently moved his arm, waking you, as you sleepily looked up at him, eyes suddenly widening as they glistened- a tell-tale sign that you were going to cry. "Thank god!" You said, head burying itself into his chest as he chuckled, a little confused on what was actually happening.

"What happened?" He said, partially also referring to your arm clad in white cloth, his inked hand gently touching it.

"We had a gas leak in our apartment." You explained, sniffling. "At first I thought you were just not feeling well, but then I started to feel unwell too, and Miri.." You went on, his hand running over your head to soothe you a little, noticing how you were getting wound up again. "And then I- I checked online and thought better be safe but you were sleeping, and you looked so bad so I called an ambulance and they said I should get you outside and I really tried-" You explained, and even though it hurt him to see your tears, he couldn't help but chuckle at that in amusement.

"Baby, you tried to carry me?" He asked, and you nodded. "My strong girl!" He teased, full on laughing when you playfully hit his arm to make him stop, a small smile on your lips. "But I highly doubt you got me even out of bed baby." He said, and a familiar voice chimed in from the door of his hospital room.

"No, but she was smart enough to get someone who could." Namjoon explained, casual clothes telling you that he wasn't there for work purpose. "I'm seriously questioning your body though. How the hell do you look like a yoga instructor but weigh as much as a professional wrestler?" Namjoon teased, making Jungkook groan in annoyance.

"Oh my god, now I owe him twice!" He said, playfully exagerating his reaction to the fact that Namjoon had helped them for the second time by now. "Please someone lay me back in my bed, I wanna die!" He said, and you hit his chest.

"No!" You said. "You're ready to leave me and Miri like that?" You said, playfully pouting as you turned away from him.

"Oh baby no, I take it back- nooo, look at me!" He whined out, making grabby hands for your just-out-of-reach sweater you wore, Namjoon laughing as he watched the scene unfold.

A couple of days later, Jungkook and you were sitting in your home again- with the pipes fixed, and plans of moving into a different apartment. For some reason, you didn't truly trust the apartment anymore- but maybe that would settle after a while.

"Hm.." Jungkook mumbled, looking at you as if checking for something, until he moved from his place on the couch, sitting up from his previously laying position. Without many words, he moved you onto his lap, his back resting against the couch, as he held you in place on his thighs. "You know everything's fixed right?" He asked, and you nodded- but he knew you simply answered to reassure him, not yourself. "Baby, I promise we can think about moving if you're really not comfortable- but let's settle down first, yeah?" He said, and you sighed.

"I know its stupid-" You began, but he quickly placed his pointer and ring finger to your lips, effectively shutting you up. You already knew that he'd argue that you weren't stupid, and you knew that- sometimes phrases like these just slipped out. So you playfully snapped after his fingers, making him shoot you a dark glance; a glint in his eyes that told you clearly that he was definitely up to play with you.

"Hm, did they never tell you to not bite the hand that feeds you?" He said, voice deep as he suddenly, and without warning, pulled you closer by your thighs, the abrupt movement forcing you to brace yourself against his chest with your hands, face inches away from his. "Or the hand that gets you off, in our case." He added, making you blush from his words.

You should be used to this by now, but somehow, as weird as it sounded, being together with Jungkook was never the same as the time before. He always found ways to make things different- either by taking it slow, or by introducing you to kinks and fantasies you never even knew were a thing. He loved excitement, loved to try out new things, even if sometimes they would turn out to be something he or you didn't enjoy. Somehow, he always managed to steer things around even if that happened however, turning an awkward situation into a sweet memory in the blink of an eye.

He groaned out lowly when you took his hand again, never breaking eye contact with him while you slowly guided his hand towards your lips- Jungkook instantly taking the hint, as he pushed his first two fingers between your lips, pushing down your tongue;

oh what a sight to see.

Both of his hands wandered towards your neck, never putting pressure- simply touching, holding you, and enjoying just how sweet you were being just for him. He loved these moments with you, these reminders that no matter how useless he felt whenever something didn't go his way, for you, he was always a hero. A knight in shining armor, your Master-

He could feel his pants getting uncomfortable at the thought of those words tumbling from your lips.

He'd probably introduce you to that someday else, because in that moment, he was way too impatient to think clear enough. He'd probably miss important clues that were sometimes so small that he himself wondered how he saw them- because you were dangerously submissive to him. He knew that if he asked, you'd do anything.

Even if you didn't like it.

"Hm.. I wonder if my baby can ride me this time?" He hummed, and you nodded, making him grin as he searched behind him for his hidden condoms in the couch- something you found quite funny at first, but by now you've gotten used to it. "Fuck." He groaned, noticing that there was no contraceptive hidden like it usually was.

"Thats a bad word, kookie." You playfully said, teasing him as he grabbed your behind quite roughly, raising his brow as his jaw clenched.

"Oh I'll make you scream out some bad words." He said, before standing up, throwing you over his shoulder in a manner that seemed to practiced to be simply winged out of nowhere. After all, this wasn't just a one time thing- he loved showing off his strength over you, and you loved it just as much in return.

Your body hitting the matress, Jungkook immediately grabbed your thighs again, pulling you to the edge of the bed where he already kneeled- placing your legs over his shoulders after almost rushing to get your clothes off. There was no gentle touching, no foreplay, he simply dived right in, pitch black eyes darkly watching you as you squirmed, back arching off the mattress every now and then in pleasure once he added the first two fingers into the game he was playing. "No smart words now, hm?" He hummed from his spot between your legs, amusement clear on his face at the sight of your trembling body. "But I'm not gonna let you suffer tonight, baby." He said, licking his lips before crawling over your body, hand reaching for the bedside table where he knew he had condoms stored in. "Take it as-" He said, while shedding his clothes before wrapping his length in the clear protection. "As a reward." He said. "For being my personal guardian angel." He said sweetly, before leaning down to connect his lips with yours. What was an innocent gesture at first, turned heated quite quick however; you would've never guessed, but Jungkook was a pretty messy kisser- open mouthed and tongue running over your lips, all while he guided his length inside you.

One thing Jungkook loved, was just how utterly small you looked underneath him. Not just that- but the way he could feel his own dick move inside you underneath his inked hand placed on your lower belly made him growl deeply as he rolled his hips in a forward motion, eyes fixed on the view he had of your cunt swallowing him as if it was nothing.

You were his.

For a long time, he didn't quite get the hype about saying that your partner belonged to you. For him, that was stupid- you couldn't 'own' a person, so why say that? But nowadays, he finally understood that no, this wasn't about ownership. It was about being able to simply have situations like these; moments of pure emotions and nothing else, with a person so devoted to yourself that you felt as if your entire life had their name.

He was yours.

Because even if he took on a more dominant role in the relationship, and a leading force in the bedroom, you had him in your hands at the end of the day. He was so utterly in love with you it sometimes hurt him to even think about it; the way you looked at him with so much adoration made him melt, the way you touched him with so much care made him feel so loved. He'd glady give his life to you if he had to choose between you and him.

"So sweet, just look at you." He mused, out of breath as he smiled, leaning over you again before kneading your soft breasts with his hands, kissing the delicate skin sweetly as he picked up his pace. "All mine, aren't you?" He said, and you nodded, mewling out something he didn't quite catch- but that was okay. "Gonna fuck you stupid, pretty girl-" He huffed out, biting the skin on your shoulder as he grew more and more sloppy. "Come on baby, cream on my cock," He grunted out, making you squirm- and open your mouth in a silent scream as Jungkooks hand found its way between your bodies, viciously moving his fingers over your most sensitive spot. The quick movement and the pressure of his length inside you finally made you come undone, hands desperately reaching for his arms as if that could save you. The orgasm you experienced made your vision bright, and unbeknownst to you, Jungkook came quickly after, panting to catch his breath, before he discarded the condom.

It took a moment for you to come back around, but when you did, the first thing you noticed was, that you were practically laying across his chest- his hand gently running up and down your arm, kisses being place on the top of your head as he bathed you in praise. "You're so sweet.." He hummed, before he noticed your eyes on him. "Welcome back princess." He grinned cockily, before placing a kiss ontop of your nose. "Come on baby, lets get you washed up and into bed, yeah?" He said, and you simply nodded.

Too tired to talk, and too comfortable in his arms to really move on your own. But that was fine.

He loved carrying you around anyways.

"You know.." Jungkook said, while you were both at the table, eating dinner. "I know I said I was uncomfortable with you calling me daddy, and I still stand by that." He said, and you nodded, unsure where he was going.

"I mean, yeah, you've said that but what does that have to do with-"

Suddenly, he leaned forwards after finishing his plate, eyes sparkling mischieviously. "I wouldn't mind hearing you call me 'Master' though." He hummed out.

And you choked on your fries.

[silversims]

CAS Legacy Series: Pastel Patisserie by @/basilgrove Generation 4: Pistachio You grew up well in a loving household, but you wanted more than the safe little life your parents built for you. You’re free spirited, and yearn to expand your mind and explore the wilderness. You spend your days living off the land and improving your wellness. You go camping often, and have many lovers throughout your lifetime. All the unprotected woohoo catches up to you, and you have a lot of children. You and your family spend your days working the farm and living commune style. Neptune Meadow Sangria Perfume | Lychee Herb Blossom Cake | Cerise Brocolli Maple Aura | Orange Limeade Capri Shortcake | Azure Reed Sunny Magic | Citrus Cucumber

[wordsfromthesol]

Nicknames

Author: @wordsfromthesol Taglist: @ghost-brocolli Pairing: Wally West x Reader Summary: Your NYU college experience wouldn’t be complete without the incredulous Wally West. Warnings: None? Like squeezing a teddy bear. Word Count: 2k

You met Wallace West your first day at NYU and you were pretty sure by the end of the year he had met, flirted with, and asked out every girl on campus. His flirtatious personality never really bothered you, especially since he always came back to you looking like a sad lost puppy whenever he was rejected. It had been three years, and here he came stumbling towards you yet again.

“I just don’t understand, Y/N/N.”

“Well maybe if you took more than a minute to get to know some of these people…”

“But they all move so slow!”

“And you are constantly rapid fire,” you chuckled at the memory of your first meeting. He probably asked you twenty questions within a few minutes. “I’m telling you, you gotta slow it with those energy drinks Speedy Gonzales.”

Wally threw his head back in exasperation, “You’ve really got to come up with better nicknames. And I’ve told you…I don’t drink those things. This is au naturale.”

“Goodie for me.”

“So anyways,” Wally began as he stepped in front of you, “up for pizza?”

“With you? Always.”

You mindlessly chatted while making your way to the usual pizza place. It never really occurred to you how often the two of you came here. You both lost track of time, which was also a regular occurrence.

“Shit.” You looked down at your watch, “Is it seriously already 10?”

“Past your bedtime?”

You rolled your eyes at the red head across the table, “Listen here, I have an 8 am class tomorrow. So yes, it is.” You moved out of the booth, “See you tomorrow Cheetah.”

“That’s not better!” Wally cried out as you exited the restaurant.

**

Dick felt a familiar breeze as he sat at his computer. He looked over to see his best friend slumped on the bed, “Something wrong, Wally?”

“I just don’t get this girl!”

“Oh shocking…Wallace West has girl problems.”

“Ughhhh!” Wally groaned throwing his face into the pillow.

“Care to elaborate?”

“I mean we hang out like all the time, but I can’t ever get a read on her. She is always talking about me striking out with other girls. But it’s not like I mean to flirt with them, I just like making friends. I just don’t understand why she can’t see that she’s the one I’m interested in. Why doesn’t she get the picture? We literally share a meal like every other day. Am I doing something wrong? Those would be dates to a normal person –”

“Wally. You know I can only pick out every other word when you start talking that fast.” The speedster took in a deep breath, ready to begin again, but before he could Dick held his hand up. “I think I got the gist though. Just actually say the word.”

“The word…right…”

“Date, say the word date next time you ask.”

“Yeah, I knew that…” Though Wally’s words did not match the confusion still pasted across his face.

“Call her now and ask.”

“But it’s late…and we were just together like two hours ago.”

“So?”

“She said she was going to sleep.”

“All I hear are excuses, do you want me to dial the number?” Dick reached for the phone, but Wally quickly pulled away.

“I got it, I got it.”

**

You had been tossing and turning for an hour before you decided to get up. I’m over this. You threw the covers down in exasperation and threw your legs over the side of the bed. Just as you moved to put on your shoes Wally’s face flashed across your phone screen.

“Wally? Is something wrong?”

“Wha…no…I just…” Wally stumbled through his words; his plan didn’t actually involve you answering the phone. He was hoping to talk to your voicemail.

“Breathe, Wally. What’s happened?” Your mind flashed through scenarios as you waited for his reply.

“Wait. Why are you awake?”

“Oh, uhm, I couldn’t sleep. I was actually about to go for a walk.” You let out a soft chuckle at the sound of your words.

“It’s almost one in the morning…”

“Ehh, the city that never sleeps, right?”

“Wait wait wait. I’ll join you, I’m nearby!” Before you could respond, Wally had hung up. You shrugged it off and made your way downstairs, unsure if Wally would actually be outside waiting for you. As soon as you stepped outside a familiar redhead made his way towards you and the two of you were off. The streets quickly passed by as you mindless chatted away, until you suddenly stopped to get your bearings. You had absolutely no idea how far or how long you had been walking.

“Oh hey, my favorite bar is near here. Care for a drink G6?”

Wally rolled his eyes at your attempt, “I move way faster than that.” But he nodded and followed your lead. Now I have to remember how to act drunk, Wally thought to himself as the two of you entered the bar.

Time always seemed to fly by whenever you were in his presence and soon one drink turned into three turned into last call.

“Alright beautiful, we are being kicked out. Think you’ll be able to sleep now?”

“Maybe…but we are definitely calling a cab home.”

The crisp night air smacked you in the face as you left the bar, making your whole body tremble. As if on instinct, Wally immediately enveloped you in a hug, then as if by magic, you were home.

“How did –” Your head frantically looked around.

“We took a cab.” Wally shrugged as he made his way to your front door. Your hand went out and clasped his wrist.

“Oh don’t even think about it mister. It’s way to late for you to go home.”

“Heh…” Wally gave you his classic side smile, “I’m sure I’ll be just fine, Y/N/N.”

You put on your best pouting face and continued, “My roommate is out of town anyways. She won’t mind if you borrow her bed.” You paused to bat your eyelashes and stick your lower lip out. Honestly, you couldn’t think why this mattered so much to you, but you were determined to have him stay. “Pleeeasee.”

“Wellll, if you care that much. Take me I’m yours gorgeous!” Wally dramatically pretended to fall into your arms.

**

The morning came too soon, and you had definitely missed your 8am class. Glancing over, your clock read 10:21am. Ugh, guess I should get up and check on Wally. You turned on the coffee machine as you passed through the kitchen and quietly opened the door. Your eyes lingered on his bare torso; you had no idea he was that fit. He never talked about the gym or working out, but clearly…you shook the thoughts from your mind and closed the door. You had just sat on the couch, coffee in hand, when Wally stumbled out of the room.

“Good morning beautiful. I’m going to go out on a limb and say you missed class this morning.”

“Ehh…” You waved off the accusation, “There’s coffee if you want it. Fair warning, I am trying to make my noon class.”

Wally held his hands up in defense, “I already told you, this energy is 100% pure, all natural me.”

“Lucky us.” The sarcasm dripping from your voice.

“Well someone is just not a morning person, are we? I’ll walk you to class whenever you’re ready.”

**

As you made your way to campus Wally suddenly pulled you aside.

“Your last class is out at 5:45, right?” Wally looked weirdly nervous and fiddled with his fingers as he questioned you.

“Yeah…” Your tone laced with confusion.

“Great! We can go grab dinner after!” Wally gleeful exclaimed, a complete 180 from his behavior at the beginning of the conversation.

“Heh, sure Wally. I guess if you aren’t sick of me after nearly 24 hours, we can get dinner.”

“I’ll never get enough of you…your nicknames however.” You lightly punched his arm as you turned to enter the building. Wally called out after you, “It’s a date then!”

“See you then, roadrunner!”

**

“And you’re back.” Dick sighed as his focus returned to the punching bag in front of him.

“Okay, so I said the word date. So she should know right. Plus, I stayed over at her house, so that’s a positive…though it was in a different room…”

Dick shook his head and attempted to listen to Wally’s high speed rant. “Alright, where are you taking her?”

“Oh uhm…I hadn’t thought about it. Eataly?”

“At like 6…right?” Dick questioned his friend, already hatching a plan in his head.

“Well her class gets out at 5:45, so yeah I guess 6…how did you know that? Have you checked up on her? Don’t tell me you did background checks.”

“Hey, gotta make sure my best friend isn’t hanging out with shady people.”

“Ugh!” Wally zipped out of the training room and attempted to find something to do to occupy his time until tonight.

**

Wally was waiting for you as you stepped outside the building. You really shouldn’t be surprised at this point. You chatted about class as the two of you made your way to the restaurant. Wally actually had made a reservation, which shocked you. The two of you had just sat down when a man with dark hair and blue eyes made his way to your table.

“Wally! I didn’t know you were bringing your date here. Me and Babs are just finishing up over there.” He pointed in a general direction before turning his eyes back to yours.

“Oh, I’m not his…this isn’t a date.” You rambled as your cheeks flushed.

“Wait, this isn’t?!”

“This is?!”

Dick had already walked away smirking. Wally sighed, half at his failed attempt to get your on a date and half for not realizing that Dick would interfere.

“I was hoping…well, I’ve always.” Wally sighed, catching his breath, “It’s never been…”

“Sentences, Wally. I need full sentences.”

Wally inhaled a deep breath and soon the flood gates were opened. “It’s never been anyone else. You always joked about me getting rejected by other girls, but I didn’t want them. I wasn’t even trying to ask them out. It was you that I’ve wanted to ask out, but then whenever I’m around you it seems that you didn’t want it. And I didn’t want to ruin our friendship, because I would be an absolute wreck without you. Honestly, I’m not sure how you put up with me…I’m not sure how most people put up with me. Everyone is just so slow. I don’t mean to go to fast and annoy people, but it seems that always –”

Your palm clasped over his mouth. “Okay. That was a lot of sentences.” You bit at your bottom lip, trying to process all the information. “I guess I just gave up after freshman year. You wanted to flirt and talk with everyone, and I think I just took that…well as you just wanted to be friends with me?” You looked down at your hand still covering his mouth, your eyes widened, and you quickly brought it back to your side of the table.

“People don’t stick around long…so I guess I overcompensate and try to make as many friends as possible. But they were always just friends. You were the only one that I ever wanted,” Wally’s eyes sunk down to the table as he mumbled, “wanted more with.”

You reached your hand across the table and placed it on his forearm, “Well then consider this a date…Blackbird.”

Wally brought his eyes up to meet yours as a smile formed on his lips, “You just look up the world’s fastest things in your free time, don’t you?”

[bepp-ers]

Headcanons #2 [1-A girls edition]

bakugo wtf the fuck are you doing there ??? anyway here are my headcanons for what it’d be like to be best friends with each 1a girl

Jiro:

firstly

i’m so gay for her

also random order of girls

i spun a wheel literally

anyway she’s a good friend

she’s always there for you

and you gotta be there for her

like

she won’t ditch you ever

also you’re the person she confides in with music things

:))

please please please hug her everyday

she likes hugs even though she doesn’t seem like it

that one emo friend™

ughh i’m gay and so are you now

she’s gay too so

;)

Hagakure:

she may be invisible but i love her

super girly

but that’s okay

you two both shop together i broke my enter button heLP--

nvm fixed it

be it clothes or groceries you guys shop for it

she’ll help you decorate your dorm

plushies and bows galore

it may not be your style

so you’ll have to say something if so

but a few in the corner wouldn’t hurt

:)

also

aTTACK HUGS !!!

seriously

she will bombard you with hugs when she sees you

walk to school with her

she’ll gush about guys to you

and you can back

girly friend™

Mina:

asjdvkldgk

where do i begin

so gay for her <333

Mina is chaotic bi energy defs

she also initiated the friendship

flirting

lots of flirting

;)

but it’s cool

she’ll also point out people she thinks are cute

which includes you

so much PINK

matching bootie shorts

they say “eat my dick”

sending each other memes at 4am

“hey [name]”

“yea”

“lemme tap dat”

“hell yea”

you guys are a wreck

honestly

but you won’t find closer friends anywhere

Tsuyu:

oml she’s adorable

like

aaaaaa my h e a r t

she’s a little tough to read as a person

but as her best friend you know all

you can usually tell what she’s thinking

but she knows you 100x better

like you’ll tug the corner of your mouth down a little

and she’ll be like

“oh is Bakugo annoying you, kero?”

magic :)

but you guys are open

and sometime she has nightmares about you getting hurt

so you gotta comfort our little froggy

also

you just gotta ask in a text

“so if you can do what a frog does”

“can you”

“can you change into a dude????”

you never did get the answer to that question

Yaomomo:

out of all girls

i am most gay for her

she could create a gun and kill me

and i’d say thank you queen

you guys have been friends for as long as you can remember

your families have partnering things for their companies

idk you don’t really care

what you care about is the amazing goddess you were fortunate enough to befriend

you

are

so

gay

for yaomomo it’s unbelievable

and uhh

she’s pretty gay herself

she thought you’d stop being friends after she told you she was a lesbian

but you were like

“ack-- marry me you’re too amazing!!!”

“i also like girls”

“seriously marry me”

you flirt a lil with her

but she’s so innocent

also a very big mum

sugar mama???

jk jk

unless.........?

ahh i love her

Ochaco:

last but by no means least

she’s so cute !!

you were friends with midoriya at middle school

and at u.a he made friends with her

and you were just

aosdfong midoriya is friends with such a cute girl ?!?!

howww ??

you can relate to her financial problems

broke af™

but you guys help each other out

you’re both the same size 

you’re thiccer than a sniccer

you like em big and chunky tho

so you share clothes

woot woot!!

“hey is that my shirt?”

“are those my jeans?”

“yea”

“yep”

“nice”

“you suit them”

so wholesome

she’s too adorable for her

you guys often get mocha an stuff together

and who knows

she leans more towards boys

but there is a slight chance she could like you more than brocolli over there

<3

okay thanks i’m trying a new format that’s got more jokes in it lmao. feel free to request please i need ideas and also i am one huge simp for like all the1a girls. also midnight, kendo, mirko, mt. lady, ahhhhh i have a boyfriend but girls tho :)) jk i love him a lot but i still have crushes on anime. k bye

[camthewitchyyoutuber]

more kitchen witchery

me: damn, i sure suck at astral projection

me: looks like i’ll have to make some pasta.

me: *dumping salt, a clear quartz crystal, broccoli, and salt into some water* 

me: LOOK HERE!! THIS PASTA?? IT HELPS ME ASTRAL PROJECT, NOT JUST “IT WILL” IT DOES. BECAUSE I MADE IT. I’M A POWERFUL 14 YEAR OLD, 5′1 WITCH. THIS IS THE BEST GODDAMN PASTA EVER. SALT? PROTECTION BABY, PEPPER? MORE PROTECTION. DON’T WANT TO SEE NO DEMONS IN THE ASTRAL REALM. BROCOLLI?...I--I ACTUALLY DON’T KNOW ABOUT THAT ONE, BUT IT’S ~MAGICAL~ BROCOLLI NOW. PARSLEY? PERFECT. COMMUNICATION FOR THE FUNKY FAIR FOLK I WANNA TALK TO. 

[margoshansons]

The Killing Kind (16/17)

Part Sixteen

MASTERLIST

Summary: Y/N finds her dad in a state he’s never been in before. The two have a conversation regarding family and patching up their differences.

Warnings: Mild swearing. ANGST. 

Notes: The penultimate chapter yay!!! It’s not very action-packed, but neither is the ending of the movie so...This is a lot more Quentin x Y/N focused more than anything and soon our beloved couple will be ripped apart thanks to well...the mid-credits scene.

“You can’t trick me anymore” Peter whispered, wrestling the gun and EDITH from her father. Y/N watched as her dad crumpled, his face hitting the ground with the rest of his body.

“Execute them all!” Peter announced, using EDITH to turn off the drones. Y/N raced forward, her body crashing into Peter’s, holding on tightly and refusing to let go.

The pair turned toward the man who had ruined all of their lives. The man who lay dying on the ground.

“How could you do this?” Peter asked, arms still wrapped around Y/N.

“You see,” Mysterio breathed, “People want to believe. And nowadays...people will believe anything.”

Silence followed his statement. MOvement slowing until…

“Is he?” Y/N asked, not sure she wanted to know the answer.

“All illusions are down” EDITH chirped. 

She collapsed. 

Her hand raised itself to her mouth, sobs wracking her body as she stared at the dead body of her father. His eyes blank and empty, all the crazy gone from them. Saltwater burnt her tongue as she sat on her knees, curling into herself as she mourned the man who abused her.

The man who had raised her. 

The man who was her first love before anyone else.

The man who broke her heart before anyone else could. 

Her body was on fire, not even Peter’s comforting embrace cooling her down. Pain spread like a virus, shutting every cell in her body down and the only thing she could think was My father is dead, my father is dead, my father is dead, my father is dead, my father is dead, my father is dead.

She crawled over, Peter long gone, wanting nothing more than to cradle her dad’s body one last time. To call him Dad without being patronizing, to tell him how much she loved him.

Her hand phased through his body.

Grief turned to anger as she realized what he had done. Her teeth clashed together before parting to release a scream unheard of. It rattled the glass, her fist pounding against the debris-covered floor.

With a start she stood up, hair hanging in sweaty clumps on her face, as her brain lit up with the exact location of Quentin Beck.

The taxi was simple to get. Easy to set up and easy to pay for. Entering the run-down building was harder than she had ever imagined. She grew up here. She was left here. She spent eight wonderful years of her life here before they were uprooted to New York. Before she got her powers.

The door swung open easily, her glare focused on the man in the MoCap suit struggling to sit up on the queen bed.

“You’ll strain yourself” She uttered, moving closer to him on the bed, energy expanding from her fingers. He watched as the daughter he had used and abused almost to death stitched up his wound, using magic he had done nothing but exploit in his lifetime.

“I was wrong” Quentin breathed out, pain lacing his voice, “You’re not useless. You’re amazing.”

Y/N ignored her father’s words, focusing on sewing the layers of muscle back together. “If I had been here any later you would’ve died.” Was all she said.

“Y/N” Quentin begged, asking his daughter to meet his eyes. The eyes that held too much pain for an eighteen-year-old. “I’m trying to tell you that I’m proud of you. Of everything you’ve done.”

“Why now?” she asked, anger seeping out. “Just because I’m healing your wound and have the power to kill you at any moment?”

Quentin shook his head, the gesture causing him to groan in pain. “You--are the best of us. Of everything. You’re so much better than your mother. Than me.”

“You never cared about my mother” Y/N called him out, “Why mention her now?” “Because she would be proud of you” He whispered, “Like me. And if I’m this close to death I want you to know the truth.”

Y/N froze, finally meeting her father’s ice-cold eyes. They weren’t crazy. They weren’t maniacal, they were simply eyes, and they were opening themselves up to her.

“Your mother wasn't from Earth” Quentin confessed, straining, “She never told me where she was from, only that she had something to do while she was here. We bonded over that. Our shared devotion to our purpose in life.”

“You’re lying” Y/N cut him off, voice thick with emotion as tears threatened to escape. 

“For the first time in my life,” Quentin announced, “I’m not.”

He pressed something deep into her palm, his rough hand gently brushing his fingers against the back of her hand. She gazed at the metal Triquetra he had pressed into her hand. It was a pin of some kind.

“She left that behind when she left me,” Quentin admitted, his breathing becoming shallower. “She never loved me. Not in the way I loved her. She just used me for my contacts at Stark Industries, to truly and get closer to the Avengers, I guess her plan failed when she dropped you off at my door. She used me too”

Y/N held back tears that were pooling in her eyes. Her mother wouldn’t do that. She wouldn’t. This was just another one of his lies, used to manipulate her into doing his bidding. 

“So you took it out on me?” She asked, ripping her hand from his. “I was a child!”

Years of repressed emotions spilled forth, eyes burning from the tears gathering near the edge. “What did I do wrong?” Y/N’s voice broke, saltwater streaming down her face, “All I ever did was what you asked and you tortured me for it.”

Quentin was silent. 

“Every little girl grows up thinking her father is going to love her above all else” Y/N ranted, chest pained, voice thick with anger. “So why didn’t you love me? Why couldn’t you just do the bare minimum and love me? Was that so much to ask?”

His mouth opened but nothing came out.

She had her answer.

“Was any of it real?” Y/N asked, furrowing her brow, ignoring the sobs she released. Her childhood played across her mind like a home video. “Did you ever love me?”

“Of course,” Quentin protested, groaning as he leaned forward to grasp her hand. “You were my little girl, you were smart, you were...stunning. How could I not love you?”

Y/N pulled her hands away, unable to stomach the thought of this man touching her.

“You were given something I never had. Something that Stark made, something Captain America was given, you were born with something so precious in this world, and your mother gave it to you.” Quentin set his jaw at the thought of the unknown woman, “I was resentful. Of her leaving, of her using me, of you.”

She met his eyes, those vulnerable soft eyes that had once belonged to the man she admired more than anything.

Quentin struggled to move forward. “But I never stopped loving and caring for you. You are and always have been the best thing I’ve made.”

She straightened up, “Is that why you almost killed me?”

“I would’ve never done that” Quentin spat, “The kid forced my hand, your life is the only one I treasure more than my own.”

Y/N scoffed, bitterness pounding through her veins. “Liar.”

“I have lied about so many things” Quentin confessed, “But my love for you is not one of them.”

Y/N turned away, setting her jaw. “I grieved you” She confessed, “The man who had taken everything from me. My pride, my security, my confidence. I looked at your dead body and grieved because, despite everything you did to me, I never wanted you dead.”

She whipped around, meeting his gaze once again. “Looks like you’re not the only one who can’t kill a family member.” 

She traced her father with a glyph, keeping him in place while she tied his hands back. He was real. That much she knew. The glyph faded and silence filled the air between the estranged relatives during the long elevator ride down.

SHIELD was eager to get their filthy hands on the man beside her. The agent with an eyepatch handed her a paper business card.

“You need anything, call us” He instructed.

All Quentin could do was stare at his only living relative. “You’re going to regret this.”

“I don’t need your validation anymore” She spat. “I don’t need you anymore. I may be related to you biologically, but you stopped being my father a long time ago.”

Quentin stared at his daughter as he was cuffed, his eyes still in the vulnerable state she had found them in. 

The two Becks could only stare at each other, watching as the last piece of their bizarre family fell apart.

Ugh, my heart, that HURTED! But in all honesty, I think this is one of my favorite chapters in the series, especially with that reveal at the end (special shoutout to those who can figure it out). Also, the magic system is weird, but I just went with it. I figured it was similar to Scarlet Witch but with a touch of aliens.

Thank you for your feedback and please like, reblog, and comment cause it makes my heart very happy!

TAG LIST: CLOSED

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[thedarklordmegatron]

In fiction you see a lot of the whole accidentally discovering they have magic trope.

So consider this, toddler Noctis' hatred of vegetables is so strong that one evening, while Regis is holding a plate of brocolli, he just glares at it and WHAM, the plate is suddenly on fire.

Regis:...

Clarus, snickering in the background: Well at least we know he's yours.

[themagicdiscoursebus]

tbh this woulda been a very intimidating mascot 

[diyshelf]

⭕️Panda Express Orange Chicken (Copycat) - Dinner, then Dessert

Ingredients (6 people) (double everything for 9 people):

For the chicken:

1 kg boneless skinless chicken thighs, cut into 2,5 cm pieces

1 egg

1.5 tsp salt

1 pinch black pepper

2 tbsp oil divided, plus more for frying

64 g cornstarch

31.25 g flour

For the sauce:

1 tbsp corn starch

2 tbsp rice wine

62.5 g water

1 tsp sesame oil

3 tbsp soy sauce

10 tbsp sugar

10 tbsp white vinegar

zest of 1 orange

To finish:

1.5 tbsp ginger root minced

2 tsp garlic minced

0.5 tsp hot red chili pepper crushed

Sauce:

1) Combine the cornstarch, rice wine, water, sesame oil, soy sauce, sugar, white vinegar and orange zest.

Chicken:

2) To coat the chicken add the egg, salt, pepper and 1 tbsp oil into a bowl and whisk together in a large bowl.

3) In a separate bowl, add ½ cup corn starch and flour and mix well.

4) In a large frying pan or a wok, heat oil in a wok 190° C.

5) Dip chicken pieces in the egg mixture, then dredge in the flour mixture.

6) Fry the chicken for 3 to 4 minutes or until golden and crisp.

7) Transfer to a cooling rack and repeat with remaining chicken.

8) When you are done with the chicken, drain most of the oil from the pan (leave about a tablespoon).

9) Add the ginger, garlic and crushed red peppers, cooking for about 10 seconds.

10) Add the orange sauce and bring to boil.

11) Turn off the heat, and add cooked chicken and stir until well mixed

NOTE: Serve with rice and steamed brocolli

[ketodietcomfort]

Keto Brawngolian Beef This is a Mongolian beef at heart, with our magic woven in 😁🤣 By: @ketobrawn . . Make sure you’re following @ketodietcomfort for more daily recipes, information and tips! ✔️ 💁 Still struggling to get into ketosis? Take a QUIZ in bio @ketodietcomfort  to make your own 8-WEEK KETO CUSTOM PLAN best fit with your needs. ➡️ You get a custom meal plan to guide you every step of the way. You’re never left to figure things out on your own. . Easy to follow customised plan will get you results in a short time! Take the quiz and get your personalized meal plan to move a step closer to your goal! Check my link in BIO @ketodietcomfort . 2 pkgs of sirloin tender steaks Some olive oil for frying 1/4 cup coconut flour 1/2 ea green, red, orange and yellow bell peppers 1 1/2 cups fresh sliced mushrooms 1 bag of steamable brocolli florets @flavorgod Pink Salt and Peppercorn, and Garlic Lovers The sauce 1/2 cup cocinut aminos 1/2 cup brown swerve 1 tsp ground ginger 1 tbsp minced garlic 1/4 cup water Heat up that cast iron and rough chop the peppers, slice the shrooms. 1) Season the steaks with some @flavorgod Pink Salt and Peppercorn. Slice across the grain thinly. 2) Dump meat into a gal ziplock and cover with the coconut flour , close and shake to coat all. 3) Add a little oil to your skillet and fry the steak strips. Lay em flat and don't over crowd. Flip in a few minutes , you should have nice color on em. A few minutes on the other side and done. Put onto a paper plate and repeat til all are done. 4) Add all the sauce ingredients in a small bowl and whisk to combine. Put mixture into a small saucepan and bring to a simmer. Turn heat to low. Start to steam the brocolli for 7 minutes in the micro. 5) When the meat is done , Liberally sprinkle @flavorgod Garlic Lovers on the veggies and fry just til tender. Add the beef back in and mix. Add the sauce in and let simmer for 10 minutes. Sprinkle with a little red pepper flake to taste and mix. Dump the brocoli on top and let rest off the heat for 10 minutes. Have a great week Brawnies !!!! ❤❤❤ (at New York City, N.Y.) https://www.instagram.com/p/CS-qB8rpWd9/?utm_medium=tumblr

[notyourneurotypicalmedstudent]

Just thought I’d post a collection of my current thoughts around health and weight/diet

One of my close friends recently wrote a blog that went viral about being a fat medical student. It was a few months ago and things have settled down around it now. But today someone tagged an obviously fit, six-pack-profile pic, young girl in the post. I could only imagine her thoughts on it. I started thinking about myself in my younger days - six pack, obsessed with “health” (my version of legitimising disordered eating and exercise behaviour). I was the poster girl for the dunning-kruger effect and I thought I knew it all. I wondered what I would think of such an article back then.

Which lead me to thinking about the time a health professional told me a few words that really changed my ideas. I had already partially given up my dieting and bodybuilding obsession and it was at the end of a counselling appointment when I was standing half out of the door that this retired GP turned counsellor said to me: “you don’t need an amazing diet to be healthy, you just need an OK diet”. The words hit me like a freight train and I searched for a few words to acknowledge the statement, but was left with nothing but “yep...uh... yep” and left the room. The counsellor, who I didnt see again (it was a casual appt and I found a permanent counsellor later on), probably didnt realise how much those few worlds really changed my life. 

So many people, med students, or lay people, think of healthiness as some kind of ethereal state. That a healthy diet is something holy that you can only achieve through hours or planning and worship. I remember laughing at people who thought normal daily diets were ok and that they didnt know that chicken and brocolli, egg whites and bland green leaves was how you achieve the unachievable. Yes  - I was that person.  Looking deeper into it I think I got there because I felt it was the only thing I was good at. I constantly failed to meet expectations at school and of my family, even though I was trying - really trying. With the gym I felt that my hard work and dedication was so easily recognised - something that I had never had before. I got some sort of status and respect just for turning up - at school turning up wasn't enough. Starting out as skinny fat the gym results were pretty easy just by turning up. Again, I achieved some sort of status as I staretd to look like a fit looking person - the status meant I ha an Identity and the identity meant I knew things about fitness. And on top of that - the in-your-face weird diet just sealed the whole deal of “I’m different and better than you at something”.

I was wrong. Healthiness is not a sacred state reserved for med students, personal trainers, the health and fitness brahmins of the world. Everyone is good enough. It does not need secret knowledge or magical ingredients. It does not look like fitspo or pinterest. It is not shiny or exciting. These are disordered thoughts. The shiny and holier-than-thou are scams, They add nothing to your health - if anything they take away from it with disorder and obsession - pressure and perfection. 

We need to replace this unattainable shiny, materialist, perfectionist picture of health with a picture of normality. Plain old boring normal. 25% body fat. Cereal for breakfast, sandwiches for lunch, meat and three veg for dinner, a few treats now and then. Make sure you have a hobby. Exercise when you can fit it in, that you actually enjoy, with bonus if it ticks off the boxes of social, community, and leisure. Try and get a good sleep if you can. And most importantly: relax, self-care, and try and chill the fuck out now and then and stop trying to be some perfect human android.

That is healthy. It is good enough. 

[fly-pow-bye]

Powerpuff Girls 2016 - “I’ll Be Bake” & “Blissfully Unaware”

No, I wasn't unaware of these. Part 1 of 2 of the four shorts they put up alongside Power of Four!

I’ll Be Bake

Wow, that is a lazy pun. Such laziness is not unfitting for this short, really.

As the title implies, this episode is all about baking. It would be a good break from the norm if the Reboot Puffs doing normal things in this reboot wasn't the norm. I'd be fine with this if it was doing the norm in a superhero way, but it's not going to be very apparent in this short.

The short starts with Blossom preparing to bake a cake. Bubbles and Buttercup show up, holding vases. They argue over which vase is more priceless, and immediately break them as soon as they see Blossom. Already, this short establishes that Bubbles and Buttercup are going to be on the insufferable end of their new personalities.

Bubbles and Buttercup beg Blossom to have them help her bake that cake, which she allows, but only if Bubbles and Buttercup are filling to follow the steps precisely. There is a potential for comedy there, though it never really pays off.

We also learn that she's making it for Student Council, in that wording. This is the only line in the short that raises any sense of urgency, but it does raise a question: didn't she forfeit the Student Council in Presidential Punchout? Maybe she could have meant making the cake for the Student Council, possibly to appease them to give up one of their seats, or maybe this is something the writers didn't think about. I'm going with the latter.

As predictable as it is, the rest of the episode is essentially just a bunch of scenes where Blossom tries to tell them something to do, and Bubblescup ruins it somehow. I say "Bubblescup", but one thing I can give this short over Bubbles Beauty Blog (But On Video) is that they try to give them things to mess up the cake in ways that fit their character.

For example, when asked for milk, Bubbles persumably steals a cow. She did have that habit of bringing random animals to the Powerpuff household in Helter Shelter, but I think it's more of an "oh, that silly Bubbles" joke. There's also Buttercup using tons of mixers with the butter, leading to a shot of a window getting covered in butter. Like blood! That's the closest this short gets to a joke I can recognize. Oh, and she says this before she does it:

Buttercup: Hasta la vista, budda.

Oh, so that's why it's called I'll Be Bake! It has a random Terminator reference! After Bubbles and Buttercup decide to play with the icers instead of using it to ice the cake, she's had it. What is she going to do? Is she going to inspire them to use their creativity in a good way? Is the cake just going to be ruined?

No, she just ties them up with duct tape, and finishes the cake herself. At least duct tape a step up from ordinary rope and rubber bands. What lesson did we really learn here? Don't let incompetent people work on anything?

This is pretty much that Bubbles Beauty Blog short, but with cooking instead of fashion, and it's Blossom being tormented instead of Bubbles. I don't look back at that episode too fondly, either. Other than some cutesy scenes that are somewhat relatable, as hard as calling anything in this reboot cute can be, this short just felt pointless in the end.

Blissfully Unaware

Oh yeah, I’m unaware of any bliss when it comes to this show, but that's not the bliss they're talking about.

But first, this short starts with an overly muscled chef named Chef Mussel. He's all about flexing his muscles, and adding a pinch of salt. For a show about little girls that can do feats of strength despite looking like cutesy little girls, they sure like muscle-related humor. At least there's some humor in the contrast.

If you haven’t guessed, this short involves everyone’s favorite character, Bliss. Just assume this happened between Bliss appearing and Bliss moving Saturn all by herself by just how amazingly not powerful she is. It really does sound like an exaggeration, but that’s actually what happens. Bliss can move entire planets, while the Powerpuff Girls you all know and love can be stopped by duct tape!

We get to know one more thing about Bliss the special didn't get into: she likes pizza. She asks the Professor if he's making pizza, and he says she's close.

The Professor is actually making something called Broccoli A La Grossier, which is filled with all the things that make 6-year-olds, and apparently 16-year-olds, squirm: broccoli, brussel sprouts, and parsnip sprouts! You know it's gross when they have to use actual photographs!

Bubbles: That’s more sprouts than I can count with my fingers!

I hope the joke is that she can only count to zero. Bliss isn't a big fan of the brocolli-based dish, either. I guess she was on an island for 10 years, so I should cut her some slack on never learning to eat her greens, or beat them for that matter. So she decides to do a plan.

While the last short was about throwing a bunch of jokes and hoping one of them sticks, this one focuses on one joke, for the short's benefit. She telekinetically moves all of the healthy food away. That sitcom dad ends up being blissfully unaware that his replacements aren't necessarily healthy. I can't say the title doesn't fit!

Bliss and the girls, their involvement is so little in this short that they might as well have a "and the rest" credit, remain smiling throughout this, acting like innocent little angels. That screenshot looks really important for some reason!

We get a montage of Bliss magically swapping the ingredients, and the chef saying things that remind me of the "Stir, Whip, Stir" scene from the Star Wars Holiday Special. PPG 2016 reminding me of great things, let me tell you. At least it's slightly funnier due to how over the top the chef is, though that's not a high bar to clear.

...the Rude Broccoli is finished, which looks suspiciously like a deep dish meat lover's pizza. Of course, the Professor looks at this, and, in a shocking twist, he doesn’t notice a thing even after staring at it. On one hand, he did say pizza was close to what he was going to make. He's happy to see the girls happy, and he promises that he'll make broccoli every night, causing them to gag. Maybe even the girls knew Bliss was temporary.

I found this better than I'll Be Bake, even if most of it is on a technicality. At least it involves a superheroine using superpowers, something that was extremely rare in the last short. I would complain about the Professor being the oblivious sitcom dad rather than the genius he should be, but that's sadly consistent with his character in the reboot.

I probably could have done all four shorts in one go, but then I’d have nothing for next Saturday. Also, I needed the break so I could use more time to study for my midterms. See you next week!

← Power of Four (Parts 3-5) ☆ Bedtime & Mojo Jojo Builds A Shelf (shorts) →

[mammothstrengthx]

Why New Year’s Fitness Resolutions Fail

While we might all think that January 2019 was the longest year ever, the truth is the new year is only 6 weeks old. If you are like most people, your New Year’s Resolutions included some kind of pledge to “really get in shape THIS year”. So, how’s working out working out for you? Again, if you are like most people the middle of February you are starting to come up with excuses as to why being fat isn’t that big of a deal. For the record, sadly I must include myself in this “most people” group.

The thing people fail to realize is that you aren’t your own boss, nor are you your own slave. You can’t just TELL yourself to eat better and suddenly starting doing it with 100% compliance. If you have been out of shape for an extended amount of time, chances are you have picked up some serious bad habits. Those habits take time to break, and it takes time to create new patterns of behavior. Be honest with yourself, how many times have you said “I am seriously going to get in shape…”, and then eventually fallen back off the wagon. Regardless of whether it was the first of the year, or some last ditch effort in Spring to drop some weight before shirts come off for Summer. The end result (ie, no results) tends to be the same.

The law of inertia states that it is the tendency of an object to resist a change in motion. That is, an object at rest will stay at rest, unless it is acted on by an external force. The same is true of an object in motion.

An obvious example is a soccer ball lying on the ground. The soccer ball will not move from that spot, unless someone kicks it. When the ball has been kicked and it’s moving through the air, it won’t stop until the force of gravity forces it to drop down to the ground; once it’s rolling on the ground, it will continue rolling until friction forces it to come to a standstill.

Guess what, in this scenario YOU are the soccer ball. Actually in America you are more likely a football. You are an odd shape, and you aren’t moving unless you forced to. When you consider so many Americans spent the last 4-5 months sitting on their couch watching football eating snacks, the metaphor becomes even more apropos.

The average American gains 7-10lbs over the holidays. The interesting thing is I would bet many of them use their impending New Year’s Resolutions as an excuse for a caloric free for all. “Well I am going to start my diet on Jan 1, so I might as well enjoy all this good food now”. Again, I speak from personal experience. Sadly all this does is reinforce bad eating habits and add more fat that has to be worked off in the New Year.

So now January 1 rolls around, you announce to all your friends that this is the year that you are going to get in shape. Your friends have heard this all before, and while they try to be encouraging there support isn’t the same as it was the last 5 years you have said this. And then you make the big mistake, you try to go from 0 to 100 mph overnight. If your body was a car, it has been in the garage all winter and you have barely even started it up. Now on Jan 1 you take it to the drag strip and wonder why it almost blows up when you floor it.

I can appreciate the enthusiasm people have when they decide this is the year they are going to get in shape (again). However, if you want to actually be successful so you don't have to say the same thing next year you have to be smart about it. You cannot go from Big Macs and Supersize Cokes to Brocolli and Salmon overnight, it is just a recipe for disaster. Likewise you cannot go from hibernating all winter to 1 hour of cardio a day and training 6 days a week. That is the reason that so many resolutions fail. People lack patience and haven't taken the time to think it through. If you have been gaining weight over the past several years, and picking up bad habits then trying to go cold turkey on January 1 isn't going to work. And if you stop and think about it, you know it isn't going to work because it didn't work for you last year or the year before when you tried it.

There is no magic 6 week program that is going to fix all of the damage you have caused yourself in the kitchen. And as I have written many times before, people waste so much time jumping from failed shortcut to failed shortcut that if they just took the slow and steady path they would already be where they wanted to be.

If you really want this time to be successful you need to have a year long plan, not just a 6 week plan. You need to ease into training so you don't injury yourself or get so sore that you never want to see a gym again. With food you need to slowly substitute good food for the crap you have been eating. For resolutions to really work the entire more of January should just be a break in month. You should learn better habits, you should get used to eating better foods. Remember, even if you get in shape you don't magically get to going back to eating shit. You have to accept that being in shape takes discipline, and in order to make it work you have to accept that it is a lifestyle and not some quick fix.

The fact that so many people fail with their New Year's Resolutions is exactly why we decided to open up our Online Training Program in February. Just after Valentine's Day when all of the holidays are over, and people have been struggling to stay consistent in the gym is when motivation really starts to fail. If you are looking for help with nutrition, training, and most of all accountability feel free to contact us about our training options. Just remember, every year that you put off getting in shape makes you another year old, and makes it that much harder to do when you finally get serious.

See additional information on: https://mammothstrength.com

[lonelybikeruae]

Life is a combination of magic and pasta ☺ #Broccoli #Pasta #Salad #comfortfood #foodie #happytummy (at Brocolli Pizza & Pasta)