#loving from afar

[dnyllmh]

Loving From Afar [Prologue]

Sanemi x OC (Rosalina Nakata) CW: Mentions of a possible abusive mother; other than that just fluff

Total Words: 2k

Loving From Afar M.List | Next Taglist: @kyojuros-eyebrows ;

-" Daddy?"

-" Yes, sweetheart?"

-" I need help. I don’t think I’m doing it right…"

-" Let me see."

The older man approached his daughter. The child was sitting down at a small desk, right in the middle of the room, practicing her writing. He sat next to her, going over everything she has written so far, and to his surprise, without a single error so far.

-" You’re doing amazing sweetheart, just keep writing. Even if you do make a mistake, it’s alright. Nobody learns how to write in one day, sometimes even I still make mistakes when I’m writing. Remember that making mistakes is normal, it makes you human!" The man spoke softly, bopping the child’s nose at the end and causing a set of giggles to erupt from the little girl's throat. 

The sweet moment is interrupted by a small knock outside the door. It slides open, to reveal one of the housekeepers, one the little girl didn’t like. The housekeeper was mean and would insult the little girl when her father wasn’t around, making her cry. She even did it in front of her mother but the little girl suspected it was all because she had instructed the housekeeper to do such.

-" Lord Nakata, there’s someone at the door wishing to speak with you." She woman spoke softly, bowing her head to the older man.

He sighed, getting up and patting the little girl on the head. He passed the housekeeper, a small thank you towards her as he passed. The little girl returned to her studies, ignoring the keeper being here, even tho she could feel the glares being thrown at her. The little girl hated her but she didn't care at that moment, she only wanted to make her father proud. She was the oldest child, she might not be the heir to the clan but she still wanted to help in any way she could. So she decided to dedicate all her focus and devotion to being a good child to her father. Shortly after the glares were replaced by her father's kind voice.

-" Rosalina?" The girl quickly turned to her father, expecting him to have some meeting and wanting to move her studies to a later time of day. 

-" Yes?" She smiled at her father.

-"You have a visitor." The father stepped aside, allowing into view a small boy. Rosalina's smile only grew at the sight of her friend. She quickly got up, her excitement making her completely forget her previous studies. As she approached the sheepish boy, he bowed his head towards her. She was only a child but the boy was aware she was of high importance, the first indication coming from the way each child was dressed. 

The boy was wearing quite plain and cheap clothes, the size a bit shorter than ideal for the boy's height and age. Rosalina on the other hand, wore a beautiful hakama, the material was clearly expensive and filled with delicate and intricate designs all along her sleeves.

Once he lifted his head up from the bow, Rosalina couldn't help but giggle. She understood her social position, but having her close friend do it still felt silly.

-"Hi Sanemi!" She boy smiled at her just as warmly as she did. 

-"Rosalina-San, I wanted to ask if you wanted to come play with me?! I already asked for your father's permission." The boy spoke, looking up towards the older man when mentioning the prior conversation, asking his permission to steal the little girl from her studies. The father simply nodded, a warm smile towards the boy. Despite their social differences, the father approved of the boy. His mother was incredibly hard-working, doing her best to feed her children, having also seen the boy work around town. Whenever he personally heard of a job offer that would be well paid but manageable by a small woman, she would be the first he would call for. The man had never met the boy's father, only heard rumors of his monstrosity towards his family and later on about his murder. 

-"I would love to!... But maybe I should change first." The girl looked down at her beautiful hakama. 

-"What's wrong with your clothes, sweetheart?" The father questioned, raising one eyebrow with curiosity. Rosalina giggled.

-"Nothing, Daddy! Mother might get upset with me if I ruin it while playing..." The bright smile slowly disappeared at the small mention of her mother. She was cruel enough as it was, Rosalina did not wish to give her mother any more reasons to punish her. The father kneeled down near the girl, coming to her eye level.

-"Who gave you this beautiful hakama?" He spoke softly while touching her sleeves.

-"You did."

-"That's right. If you ruin it, I'll buy you two more. If your mother says anything, you tell me. Alright?" His tone was stern yet his smile never changed while comforting his daughter. The girl nodded at her father's words as her smile returned, while also taking advantage of his kneeling to hug him tightly. He didn't get a chance to hug her back, her excitement taking the best of her while she ran outside while pulling on the boy's hand.

-"You're too soft on her, Ayumu." Almost as if from the shadows, the mother appeared. "She needs to learn how to be a proper wife. She doesn't need to spend time humiliating herself around that street boy." Father didn't react to her words, his back towards her, almost choosing to ignore her. He did not wish that future for her. He might have had the fate of an arranged marriage but he wouldn't let his children go down the same path, hoping they would be able to pick their own life partners. 

-"She doesn't need to worry about that. Not while I'm here." Mother snarled.

-"We'll see about that." Those were her last words as she disappeared through the shadows of the house, the same way she had originally appeared.

-"Rosieee~!!" Sanemi whined as his friend splashed water on his face, her only response being another fit of giggles as she ran from him, avoiding getting splashed herself. The two were down at the small river that passed near the town, close enough so neither parent would freak out but far enough to be as loud as they wanted. Sanemi had rolled his pants up to his knees to avoid getting them soaked, while Rosie preferred to stay out of the water complaining about how cold it was. That didn't stop her from still splashing him though. 

-"You asked for it, Nemi!" She said, her eyes full of tears from laughing so hard.

-"I said it was hot today, NOT for you to splash me!"

-"Same thing, you baby!" Sanemi pouted at her. At this point his hair was sticking to his forehead, shirt slightly drenched while her? Fully dried, her hair still has perfectly done as it was when they first left her estate. But it wouldn’t be for long. 

Sanemi had his head low, faking being upset. He knew she would feel bad, she was never one to take jokes too far, caring too much about their friendship. As he made his way back into land, Rosalina's laugh died down.

-"Nemi, wait! I'm sorry, I didn't mean to upset you." He could hear the concern in her voice. With his head still low, he walked just close enough to see the tips of her hakama and then he got his revenge. Before she even had time to react, he was bending down and throwing as much as his small hands could towards her, laughing the whole time. 

She quickly got up, trying to get out of his reach, realizing she had been tricked by him. By the time she was far enough, it was too late. Her perfectly done hair was now a mess, almost a mirror of Sanemis. She turned towards him, her mouth open almost as if offended by his actions while all he did was hug his stomach from crying too hard. At this point, there was no use running, the damage had already been done, so she walks back towards him.

He sat down on the grass, his feet still in the water. She sat next to him but still not fond enough of the water's temperature to put her feet in like Sanemi had done.

-"Thanks for saving me today." Rosie spoke softly.

-"Don't mention it! I know how much you hate having your nose stuck in books all day." He gave her a warm smile, which she happily mirrored. Rosie looked up towards the sky, watching as the clouds went by. Sanemi admired her a second, a small blush creeping on his face, before looking up as well.

-" You already know what I did... what about you? anything new?" It was her turn to admire him. She always found Sanemi to be the cutest boy she had seen, even compared to the high-born boys her mother had forced her to meet.

-" Same as usual, sold some stuff around town with Genya to help Mom... I wish I could help her more." He sighed as he laid down on the grass, eyes still focusing on the clouds. "I'm the oldest son, it's my job to help and take care of them."

-" You're 10, Nemi. There's not much more you can do, you already do too much."

-" I don't have a choice with Dad gone." They fell into silence. She decided to lie down as well, her head angled almost as if resting her head on his shoulder. He quickly leaned his head into hers.

It was times like this when Rosie felt bad about complaining about her life. She knew Sanemi had it much worse than him yet he never said anything, only listening to her, while he had to around town pulling a cart probably double his weight just so he could make some extra yen for his mother. 

-"I can smell the burning from here..." He teased. He could tell she was lost in thought. She had the habit of going silent when something was running around her mind, as opposed to her usual chatty self. 

-" I just wish... I wish Dad would teach me swordsmanship as he does with my brother. Then I could teach you... and we could run away from here." She moved her head slightly, so she would be able to look at him. " We could earn some good money and help your mom!"He stared at her face, almost lost in thought as well.

-" You would do that? Run away with me and help my mom?" The thought of someone giving up their own life of luxury just to help them made him quite emotional and Rosie was special to him, so that didn't help either. -"Of course, Nemi! I'd go to the end of the world with you if you asked." -"The world doesn't end, Rosie! It's a sphere, remember? I thought you were supposed to be the smart one."She giggled at his teasing. 

After another brief moment of silence, Sanemi lifted his arm towards the sky, his pinky extended. -"Let's make a deal!"

-"A deal?? Daddy said only drunk men make deals..."

-"A promise then."

-"I don’t know how I feel about that."

-"Rosie!"

-"Okay! Fine! What's the promise?"She asked as she lifted her arm up in the air as well, imitating Sanemi. He seemed to ponder for a second before turning his face towards her again, finally speaking. 

-"Let's promise to help each other. Let's become swordsman, or- woman, in your case, and then we can help my mom, we can protect each other and always have fun together." Rosie giggled at the last part. As he finished his sentence, she back to their arms still extended, wrapping her pinky finger around his.

-"Deal!"

-"I thought only drunk men made deals?" 

-"Nemiii~!" The boy giggled as she was the one now whining after he had used her own words again her. She let go of his pinky and got up from her spot, starting to walk back up the path towards town. Sanemi quickly got up and followed his friend.

-"Wait for me, you baby!"

A/N: AAAAH!❤️ It's finally here, I'm so excited! I hope whoever reads this enjoys and feel free to ask questions about Rosie.

[jhogarcia80]

I just can remember how close we are when we’re still young..

Never realizing that I’m looking too far, yet you are just there for me all the time…

Sad part is that, you will just realize when its too late to know… 😔😔😔

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

It's just guys night talk! Don't worry about it!

(Read Tiger Tiger and shake this man awake so he can finish that thought!)

[malinaa]

if i think about the hunger games in peeta's perspective i WILL start sobbing

[thegreatpeanut]

senpai 🌸

[gummi-ships]

Worlds of Kingdom Hearts 3

[queerdraws]

projecting on luffy again. get bited.

[dollypopup]

"But how did Colin not know Penelope had a crush on him?"

Babes, how did Penelope not know Colin had a crush on her?

He literally bought and ate the same cake she did as he stared longingly at her? He sprinted for that balloon rope, fully ready to haul 800 pounds on his lonesome so she wouldn't be hurt? He bribed her maid so they could have alone time and then scurried off after her every moment of every event they're in together? He is always in her garden? He cuts into her dance? He glared daggers through Debling's face? He rushes up to her to say he's been meaning to ask her something and stares so deep into her eyes I swear boy was looking into her soul? He loses track of his sentences because he just starts pining mid-syllable? He looks at her lips all the time? He chugs lemonade after she compliments how his eyes shine when he's kind? He runs off after her carriage, panting, cravatless, asking if she accepted a proposal and to please please please let him in, and she's still like "I can't believe he'd think you have feelings for me!" When my boy has been out here getting a phd in down baderism?

They're both idiots in love, your honor

[little-pup-pip]

Build-A-Bear Chococat!!

[clown-eating-pig]

Martín Boobw- I mean Blackwood!

Bonus live Jon reaction:

[girlboyburger]

cow cuddles commission for @/halfcrazydaisy featuring @/sleepycowtails !! 🐮💕🌾

[dnyllmh]

Loving From Afar [Sanemi Shinazugawa]

Pairing: Sanemi Shinazugawa x OC (Rosalina Nakata)

Summary: What happens when a raging fool like Sanemi encounters his first love once again, the same girl he promised the world to as a child? What happens when Rosalina gets sick of loving Sanemi from afar?

Spotify Playlist | Wattpad | Extra Content

Prologue | Part 1 | Part 2 | ...

Total Word Count: -

Taglist: @kyojuros-eyebrows

A/N: I seem to have a thing for broken men...

[post-it-notes7]

a star warrior you say

[bacchuschucklefuck]

this has been a roller coaster of a design journey but finally I can present you: class swap artificer!adaine and rogue!fabian

[perrybearwaks]

[lgbtlunaverse]

It seems the dash has been talking about the Lan Xichen - Nie Huaisang post-canon dynamics and it's gotten me thinking about how discussion around post-canon Lan Xichen's absolutely horrendous mental state often center around the question of "who is Lan Xichen angry at and who does he feel guilty about" which, at its worst, seperates into 2 camps where according to one side he feels guilty about not protecting jgy and hates the Nies and, on the other side he has completely flipped on jgy and despises him now while being filled with regret towards both nmj and nhs.

And I dislike both of these takes not just because it often feels like people projecting their own Blorbo opinions onto Lan Xichen which is never a fun time but also because that central question is flawed to begin with. It treats anger and guilt like opposing emotions that can't coexist or, if they do, have to compete until one wins and cancels the other out.

And that's not how that... works.

To be clear, the reason why Lan Xichen is so supremely fucked up at the end of the story is that he believes on some level he fucked over everyone in this situation. And, even more importantly, that even with hindsight he can't actually think of what he should have done instead. Every attempt to do better by one seems to involve fucking over the others even more because these people were in conflict with each other and choosing one would mean standing against another

And none of this would actually stop him from feeling angry at any of them. It's not "who is he angry at and who does he feel guilty about" it's: "he is angry at everyone and feels an immediate and bone deep guilt for daring to think badly of them."

Speaking from personal experience here, but feeling like you're not allowed to be angry at someone because you wronged them really doesn't stop the feeling, it just maks you feel like shit for feeling it. And this is all worsened by the fact that what he's in seclusion for is, at the end of the day, a moral question of what he, Lan Xichen, did wrong and every single emotion serves as further proof of the ways he's failed them.

Is he angry at Jin Guangyao, for killing his oldest friend, using Lan xichen's trust in him to do it, and then lying to him about it and countless other things for a decade when Lan Xichen thought of him as the person he trusted the most in the entire world? Yeah. That's a thing people get angry about! Except Jin Guangyao also saved his life and protected and helped him more times than he can count and never ever hurt him and can Lan Xichen say the same? No. He had to clean A-Yao's blood off Shouyue, he has to be haunted by the fact that if he just hadn't listened to Huaisang- hadn't been just like everyone else, in the end, and believed a lie about Jin Guangyao just to think the worst of him- then Jin Guangyao might still be alive.

Is he angry at Huaisang? For orchestrating the death of his best friend? For making him do it? For knowing what the real cause behind Nie Mingjue's death was and never telling him until he found out in the absolute worst way? Absolutely. But didn't Huaisang hide it from him for a reason? Wasn't it his clan's techniques and his personal faith in Jin Guangyao that cost Huaisang his brother? How dare he demand that Huaisang let him in on the secret of his brother's murderer when Lan Xichen is here wondering about how he should have protected that murderer better!

And I do even think he's angry at Nie Mingjue, sometimes I think it's pretty normal to be angry at your friend for kicking your other friend down the stairs and threatening to kill him, even when you know his mind is being poisoned. And years later the last thing he ever saw of Nie Mingjue was Nie Mingjue's thoughtless corpse coming to kill him before Jin Guangyao pushed him away and then proceeded to graphocally snap Jin Guangyao's neck in front of him. And if what he wants to do is protect Jin Guangyao, shouldn't he be mad at Mingjue? Didn't this whole mess start because Jin Guangyao was afraid Nie Mingjue was going to kill him?

Except holy shit, can you imagine? Lan Xichen feels like he personally has Nie Mingjue's blood on his hands. Your oldest friend is killed in front of you and you happily believe it's an accident for 11 years and now you think you have the right to be mad at him? You watched him get worse as he was being poisoned and attributed it to his illness and not to the techniques stolen from your library with the token you give his murderer. Does he think Nie Mingjue knew who he was in that moment and wanted to kill him? That he blamed Lan Xichen for his death? (For the record, I don't. I don't agree with most of what Lan Xichen thinks about himself, but I've been in a self-blame spiral and I know how it feels)

But what was he supposed to do then? Choose Mingjue's side and let A-Yao die? That's also unacceptable. But so is letting Jin Guangyao get away with it. Every single outcome is unacceptable. And really, if Jin Guangyao felt like he had to kill Nie Mingjue to save himself, when it was Lan Xichen who was supposed to keep the peace between them, isn't that another mark of his failure? That he couldn't protect Jin Guangyao well enough that he felt he had to do something so horrible?

But that's not an answer! He's supposed to know what he should have done different, and all he can come up with is "what you were already doing, but without failing this time" He can't pick a side because that means betrayal, but he's already tried not picking a side and it ended like this! There is no right answer, which can only leave him with the idea that he was simply doomed to hurt the people he loved from the start. No wonder the guy looks like shit when we see him post-canon. They put him in a real life trolley problem and gave him the lever as a souvenir.