#louis straight up hates him by now

[crazydaymycrazyway]

William: Why is Louis mad at you?

Sherlock: He said I was being 'uncultured', 'mannerless' and 'Sherlock'

Sherlock: The last one was my name, but you should've heard his voice

[merrybloomwrites]

When You're Lost, Just Look For Me

Summary: You’re not always good at asking for what you need. Luckily your bandmates know when you need a little extra love and are there to support you.

Word Count: 2.5K

CW: mentions of: neglectful family, periods, little bit of online hate

This story is set in the 1D days, and therefore Liam is a main character just like the other boys. Wanted to give a heads up in case anyone wants to avoid stories with him in it.

AN: When the news broke last week I wasn’t sure if I was going to continue writing, and really didn’t know what I would write about if I did. But then Passing Contact doubled in notes so I took that as a hint that it’s what people might want to read right now. So I decided to write a part 2 in hopes that it can help people in any way.

I have a couple other ideas for stories of reader x one direction that would also take place back when they were touring, but if you have any requests please let me know

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It’s a day off in a random hotel room in a random city in the United States. Of that you’re sure. But you're not sure of much else at the moment. 

You’re thinking back to the past few days. You’d messed up your backing vocals on stage, and had to re-record your parts for the next album because you just could not get it right. Numerous rumors were being spread about you being spotted with random boys, leading to renewed comments calling you all kinds of nasty things. 

You’re still in your pajamas, which you realize somehow consist of a pair of Louis’ sweatpants, one of Zayn's t-shirts, and a sweatshirt Liam had given you a week ago that you have yet to return. You think about texting one of them to come hang out, but you don’t want your glum mood to bring them down. Instead you turn on the TV and wrap yourself in all your blankets. 

It’s what you always did as a child when you were sad. Your family was never open with their emotions, and affection made them uncomfortable. From a young age you knew that going to your parents for comfort would end with rejection. So you’d learned how to comfort yourself. 

The blanket nest barely does its job today, and you’re still lost in your thoughts of self doubt when a knock at the door startles you. 

For a second you think about ignoring it, but odds are the person knocking wouldn’t just go away. So you pull yourself up and open the door, seeing Niall there waiting for you. 

“Hey, haven’t heard from you today, wanted to see what you’re up to,” he says. 

You’re hit with a wave of embarrassment, not wanting to admit that you've been wallowing all day. 

“Just taking it easy,” you reply, “Catching up on sleep.” It’s believable enough, none of you sleep too well on the bus and this is your first hotel bed in over a week. 

“I hear ya, think I slept twelve hours straight,” Niall says with a laugh. 

Knowing that he’s hoping for an invitation you step aside and motion your arm, silently asking him to join you in your room. You glance around quickly, glad to see everything is neat except the bed. You hope that he doesn’t judge the mess of blankets, and considering he just kicks off his shoes and climbs into your bed, you assume he’s fine with it. 

“What are we watching?” Is his next question so you sit on the other side of the bed and pass him the remote, allowing him to scroll through the channels until he finds some nature show that looks mildly interesting. 

You stare at the screen but you’re not focusing on it. You’re more focused on Niall just a couple feet away from you. 

During a celebration after the first tour, where you’d all indulged a bit with some drinks, you’d let slip about your family and your reluctance when it comes to physical affection. They listened and then made it a goal to help you be more comfortable with hugs, and hand holding, and all kinds of friendly contact. 

And it was nice. You’d always known that babies could be touch deprived, but you’d learned that adults can be starved for human touch as well. There was no doubt that you fell into this category, so getting random bouts of touch and affection from your band members had been healing in a way.

But lately things have been so crazy that everyone has been focusing on themselves. Plus you’re older now, not the teens that you were when you started the band. As people in your early twenties, the casual physical affection has dwindled. 

The boys seem to be coping with this, as though they haven’t even realized that the group hugs and cuddle piles have stopped. But you’ve noticed. And you’ll be the first to admit that you miss it. 

Now especially, with all this stress and disappointment weighing you down, you can’t help but desire a hug, one so tight that you can just burrow into one of the boys for a little while and feel safe and loved. 

But even though Niall is right there, you can’t bring yourself to ask. You can’t even move closer and get rid of the space between you. Because it was always the boys initiating the contact. You’re nervous to try, terrified that you might get rejected. 

Niall can tell something is going on with you, but he’s not sure what. He’s never been the best at navigating other people’s emotions so he calls in backup by sending a text to Harry who arrives a little bit later. He brings lunch with him, and you’re grateful for that since you’ve barely eaten all day. 

The three of you sit together at the table to eat. The food is good, and you’re grateful that Niall and Harry are talking to each other because you don’t have much to add right now. You don’t realize the way they’re watching you, communicating their worry through pointed looks. 

When lunch is done you all head back to the bed and put on a movie. You’re sitting against the headboard, Niall on your left and Harry on your right. And somehow, they’re still not touching you. At this point you’d take a brush of their arm against yours. Anything to help you feel less alone. And yet, you can’t bring yourself to lean closer to either of them. It’s maddening. 

“Y/N,” Harry says, catching your attention.

“Yea?”

“What’s wrong?” he asks.

“Nothing,” you reply, not even sure why you’re lying to him.

“We know something is bothering you,” Niall adds. 

You take a breath before spilling everything that’s been going on. They listen and reassure you and while you do feel better after talking with them, there’s still that part of you that’s so on edge.

“What do you need?” Harry asks.

You think about it for a moment and say, “What I need is for people to stop judging me.”

“That’s a fair point. But I want to know what you need right now. From us.” Harry says.

The thing is, he knows the answer. He’s already aware of what would make you feel better. But he wants you to say it. He wants you to be comfortable to voice your needs with him and the other boys. 

Finally you blurt out, “I just need a hug.”

“That’s not it,” Harry says.

Now you’re confused. It’s what you want. You tapped into all your bravery to even say that. And now he’s telling you that’s not right?

“You want something more than that. Need something more than that,” he adds. 

You think about it for a moment and you realize that he’s right. A little hug isn’t going to cut it.

“I need someone to hold me,” you say quietly. “I need to be held.”

Neither boy hesitates now, and you end up tucking into Harry's side with Niall wrapping around you. They hold you tight, hands gently rubbing your back or arms to soothe you. 

It’s not often that you allow yourself to cry, but you do now. You heave out a sob and feel their arms tighten around you. They stay like that until your sobs turn into tears before finally drying up. 

“Thank you,” you say quietly once you’ve calmed down fully. 

“Of course, YN,” Niall says. “We’re always here for you. Whatever you need.”

“We’re in this together,” Harry adds. “And we take care of each other. Always.”

Their kindness, and comfort has you feeling so much better, but you remain in their hold just a bit longer. It feels so nice to have this type of physical contact after so long without it. 

The three of you eventually get cleaned up and join the rest of the boys for dinner. You end the day feeling so much better than you did at the start, and you know it’s thanks to these boys you call family. 

But despite how nice it felt to be held, thoughts of doubt and embarrassment fill your mind in the weeks that follow. When you look back at that afternoon you first think about how good it felt. And then you begin to feel weak that you even needed to be babied in the first place. 

You vow to be stronger in the future and not ask for that again. They have their own things, they don’t need to be taking care of you too. At least, that’s what your parents had always said. 

Tour continues, and one night you all have to stay at the venue for a while after the show. Security said something about it being unsafe to travel just yet, but you were too tired to listen to the details. 

After more than an hour of hanging out backstage you finally get the all clear to head out. But in that time you’d practically fallen asleep on the sofa. You have zero desire to get up so you sleepily raise your arms and look at Liam who’s standing before you and say, “Carry me.”

He chuckles, and a sweet smile appears on his face. Without even saying a word he leans down and slides an arm behind your back, the other under your knees to scoop you up bridal style. You sling one arm around his neck and hold on as he adjusts his grip to make sure you are secure. 

Once back on the bus he tucks you in, straightening your extra blanket and placing your stuffed cat in your arms. He runs a gentle hand through your hair until you fall asleep, once again feeling so safe and loved. 

A couple weeks later your period hits, and for some reason this month is especially bad. It’s day two of non stop cramps, and as much as you try to keep this a secret from the boys, they always know when you’re feeling particularly bad. 

Louis is the one to find you curled up on the couch. He brings chocolate, pain relievers, and some tea that’s supposed to help. You’d never heard of it before, but apparently his sisters swear by it. 

When nothing helps right away he lays down with you. His hand goes to your stomach and begins to rub, somehow soothing more than just the pain. Once your cramps finally go away you turn so that you're facing Louis. You tuck your head under his chin and he puts his arm around your waist to keep you close. 

It should be strange, being so close to him. But it just feels right, just like it does with the other boys. You let yourself enjoy the comfort as Louis’ hand rubs gentle circles on your back. 

Not only are your cramps gone, but the feelings of sadness and anxiety that usually come with your period are gone too, all thanks to Louis’ compassion and gentleness. 

A few days later you're sleeping in your bunk when a nightmare hits. It’s one that you used to get all the time, but now only comes when you’re extra exhausted or stressed. And with it being the last couple weeks of tour, you’re both of those things. 

You wake up gasping, adrenaline coursing through your body. You hoped that you were quiet and didn’t wake anyone else, but a moment later Zayn appears and asks if you’re alright. 

“I’m fine,” you reply. “Just a dream. I’m good now.”

But of course these boys can read you like a book. And Zayn immediately knows you’re not fine. 

“Scooch over,” he says, and you listen. As soon as there’s room he climbs in the bunk with you. He lays on his back and pulls you so your head is resting on his chest. 

You get comfy but you can’t help but feel bad. These bunks are small, uncomfortable for just one person. Definitely cramped with two.  

“You don’t have to stay. I’ll be fine,” you say. 

“Nonsense. No one should be alone when they don’t have to,” he replies. 

You can't argue with that. The two of you hold each other close and fall into a peaceful sleep. He’s still there when you wake up in the morning and you snuggle closer, taking advantage of his comforting touch. 

When tour ends you’re a weird mixture of relieved and sad. It had been exhausting, but so wonderful. 

And you have to admit to yourself that you’re going to miss the boys. It’s only a couple of weeks apart before you come back together, but you’ll be back home with your family during that time. 

And you’re realizing that they’re not really family to you. 

Zayn, Niall, Louis, Liam, and Harry are your family. They care for you in ways your own parents never did. And you’re going to miss that while you’re all back home. 

The boys know how you feel about going to stay with your family. That’s why they plan a night in rather than going out to party. You have some drinks and pizza, and spend the evening reminiscing about the past months you had together. 

The later it gets, the more glum you feel. You know the goodbyes are coming soon, and that puts a damper on your mood. 

Liam’s the first to notice how quiet you’ve gotten. He sits next to you on the couch and gently nudges you with his shoulder. 

“What’s wrong?” He asks. 

You don’t want to bring down the party, but you can’t ignore his pleading eyes so you reply, “I’m just going to miss you guys.”

He nods but continues to look at you, knowing there’s more to it. Sighing you add, “And you guys are so happy and so warm. At home everyone’s cold and distant.”

“What can we do to help?” He asks. A memory pops into your head. Another hotel room when you were feeling down. You know exactly what you need. And you’re no longer scared or embarrassed to ask for it. 

“I need to be held,” you say. 

“I think we can do that,” Liam says before once again picking you up and announcing, “Cuddle party on the bed!”

He gently tosses you onto the plush king bed and in no time you’re surrounded by your boys. That’s how the six of you sleep that night, all snuggled together in one big pile. 

You’ve never before felt so safe, so loved. And you’ll forever be grateful for the opportunity you received that brought you close to these boys. Because they are the ones who taught you what love truly feels like.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

AN: While I was working on this a butterfly landed next to me and stuck around for a while. Brought me a bit of peace.

To my readers, I hope you’re all doing okay, and if you need someone to talk to know that I’m here and willing to talk!

[golden-cherry]

deal - cl16 (9/?)

Pairing: Charles Leclerc x Reader

Series Summary: Your whole life has gone to shit. Your boyfriend broke up with you, you just lost your job and the Monegasque, who suddenly stands in your doorway, claims that it’s his apartment.

Chapter Summary: Finding an outfit is harder that it seams. Especially when your roommate can't really help you, because he's at his other apartment.

Warnings: fluff, angst (whoops), mentions of cheating (not Charles), mentions of smut (oral, fingering, p in v), angry Charles, text messages

Word Count: 3.6k

series masterlist

previous part

A/N: here it is friends. did my absolute best and honestly, I'm sweating so hard. I chose the name for Charles ex bc it’s the name of the girl my best friend absolutely despises. and this is not a Charlotte hate acc. hope you like it still. feedback is appreciated!

The weather app on your phone is of relatively little help. 

Charles had said that you were going out to dinner around eight o'clock in the evening, and according to the app, it should still be fifteen degrees then, even though it's December. While he had said that "it doesn't matter what you wear," but if you were going to be spending more time with him soon, and by extension his friends, you would want to make a good first impression. 

Not that your first impression on Charles was particularly good. 

Since you promised Charles that he could sleep in his bed tonight, you try to keep the mess of clothes to a minimum. Instead of pulling each piece of clothing out of the closet and then tossing it into the nearest corner because it doesn't match what you had in mind, you put things neatly folded back in their place. 

After your roommate left the apartment, you started cleaning up your room so it wouldn't be too embarrassing if Charles stayed there tonight. After all, he doesn't need to see your underwear or the little stuffed animal turtle that sleeps in bed with you. Generally things that maybe old friends know about you, but definitely not the roommate you've been living with for two days.

The roommate who is no help to you when it comes to choosing clothes for tonight. Since he hasn't told you which restaurant it is, you don't know exactly what the dress code looks like, which is why you're now standing in front of the closet at a loss. 

In Monaco, when it comes to restaurant choice, anything is possible. You could dine at Le Louis XV, the most expensive restaurant in Monte-Carlo, or Jack Monaco, which is significantly cheaper, but you have a direct view of the harbor with the oversized and expensive yachts.

Secretly, you hope it won't be too expensive tonight. Joris would pay you back the rent soon, but you're still unemployed and unfortunately can't live quite as carefree Charles, who apparently has enough money at his disposal to have not one, but two apartments in Monaco. 

A fact that you would never blame him for. 

When you can't find anything that would theoretically go with any restaurant visit, you drop onto the bed, annoyed. It can't be that hard to find something, right? You fish your cell phone out of the pocket of your sweater and start typing. 

Briefly, you consider actually sending the message, but alas, you're so desperate that you feel you have no choice. You hit send and are about to throw the phone across the room as if you've just confessed to your school crush that you like him. 

But Charles isn't your school crush. He's your roommate and first and foremost your friend, which is why you just drop the phone on the bed next to you. 

You sit up and narrow your eyes as you go through the clothes in the open closet. Somewhere in there is a pair of dark gray, straight-cut jeans that match the white blouse you carefully hung back on the hanger a few minutes ago. 

And sure enough. After a few minutes of rummaging around in the clothes, you find the jeans and as you hold them up next to the blouse, you're relatively pleased with the choice. There should also be shoes floating around somewhere that should go with them. But at least this is a good start. 

Satisfied, you clean up the rest of the room. Since Charles has not invited you to dinner, but also to a club, you will certainly be home late, so you decide to make up Charles' bed. Your bedding disappears into the hall closet after you take Charles' things out. As you bring them into the bedroom and spread them out on the bed, you find yourself briefly considering pressing your face into the pillow. For sure, Charles smells attached to it. 

But before you can do that, your cell phone vibrates. It's a message from Charles. 

Your heart skips a beat. Do friends give each other compliments like that? You glance from your phone to Charles' pillow, then to your outfit for tonight. You bite the inside of your cheek and start typing. 

You plug your phone into the charging cord as you head toward the bathroom to shower and get ready for the evening, so you don't see the two messages Charles sends you.

-

The Ferrari feels different somehow. After Charles sat in your old Renault yesterday, the expensive Ferrari feels strange under him. Not wrong, but different. Like something is missing. 

He feels the stares on him as he steers the car through the streets of Monaco. The gray Ferrari attracts attention, with its red and white stripes and the number 16 on the side. But not just because the 488 Pista Spider is a beautiful car. 

But because people know who owns the car.

The fact that you don't know that Charles is the Charles Leclerc is refreshing for him, but the guilty conscience gnaws at him. He should tell you that he drives in Formula 1, because after all, you would be dragged into the limelight by him, should people find out that you are friends and, above all, that you live together. Before that happens, he should at least give you the opportunity to get out of it. 

But Charles is too selfish for that. 

Even though you've only known each other for a short time, Charles enjoys your company too much to mess it up. You're so normal, so kind, without asking for anything in return like most want him to do. You're just you. And by God, he's never felt better than in his short time with you. 

He expertly steers the Ferrari into a parking garage entrance, where he has to type a pin into the designated keypad next to him before the barrier. The barrier opens so that he can drive a few meters further, where a metal gate awaits him, where he also has to enter a pin - a different one. Only then does he reach the parking lot that rightfully belongs to him. 

It has been some time since he has been here. After driving the last race of the season in Abu Dhabi about three weeks ago and becoming vice world champion, he had stayed on site for a short time to soak up some sun and recover from the stress before flying back to Maranello with his team for a final briefing and to discuss the upcoming season. But even that only lasted a few days. He could have been back in Monaco by now. 

But he didn't want to. 

He knew exactly what was waiting for him here. A conversation he wanted to delay as long as possible. He didn't stay away from Monaco for so long for no reason, and he wondered if he hadn't returned too soon. But he can't, first, avoid this conversation, and second, stay away from his home. He loves it here too much for that. Just like other things he'd rather not think about right now. 

In the elevator, he puts his key in the designated hole and then presses the button with the number of the floor where his apartment is located. Just a few weeks ago, he thought that if he entered this building again, his heart would be beating wildly in his chest or his palms would be sweaty, but he is not even nervous. 

He knows what's waiting for him behind the elevator door. And he's ready to wrap things up.

Charles enters the apartment as he has thousands of times before. And just like hundreds of times before, he hears the sound of footsteps on the floor moving quickly in his direction. But never before has he felt this indifference to those footsteps. 

"Charles?" A woman comes out of the room where the living room is located and rushes toward him with her arms outstretched. When she reaches him, she wraps her arms around his torso to hold him close, but Charles puts his hands on her shoulders and gently but firmly pushes her away. "Charles, I'm so sorry. What I did is inexcusable and I will-"

"'You won't do anything,'" he interrupts her, wishing he could jump in the shower to wash her touch off him. "I'm just here to get some things. And to ask you to stop calling." He walks past her down the hall and into the room where his clothes are. 

"And I told you I would do everything I could to make this right between us," the woman says as she follows him. She places herself in the doorway with her arms crossed as he packs some of his clothes into a large gym bag. "I'm not ready to give up on us yet, Charles. I love you."

Charles can't stop the laughter that escapes him. After stuffing several pairs of socks into his side pocket, he turns to her and puts a hand on his hip. "You gave us up when you fucked that guy, Annika. And dare you to talk about love. You don't even know what that is."

As his phone vibrates in his pocket, he fishes it out. A message from Y/N. He doesn't even notice that a small smile creeps onto his face at that. 

But she does. "Who's that? Do you have a new one already?" 

Charles quickly types a reply and presses send before turning back to his clothes. "No," he says coldly. "And even if it were, it wouldn't be any of your business."

"Of course it's my business!" Annika almost screeches as she takes a few steps toward him. "I'm your girlfriend, after all!"

"You," Charles zips up the bag and stands in front of her, "are the absolute last person I want anything to do with." He pushes past her into the hallway, where he drops the bag on the floor to go into the bedroom, where some odds and ends are waiting for him to take as well.

Annika follows him like a dog follows its master. "And why do you let me stay here then?"

"Because I'm nice."

"You're not that nice. We both know that."

Charles looks at the picture frames sitting on the windowsill. Among them is a picture of him and his father when Charles was little and went karting. It's a fond memory that he certainly doesn't want to leave here with her. "I've changed."

In disbelief, Annika laughs. "Never. In the two years we were together, I asked you so many times for things that should have been natural for a relationship, but what came from you? Nothing." Now it's her turn to put her hands on her hips. "You're so focused on your job that you don't notice what's going on around you! If you had paid more attention to me, then-"

"Then what? Then you wouldn't have slept with that idiot? Then we would have been happy forever? Peace and happiness?" Charles takes some pictures out of the frames and carefully lays them on top of each other so they don't scratch. He would leave the frames here, after all, they were gifts from Annika. And he definitely doesn't want to keep them. "Grow up, Annika. You knew what you were getting into from the start."

"But not that I have to share you with the whole world." Slowly, she walks toward him and as she stands in front of him, she places her perfectly manicured hands against his chest. "You're all I've ever wanted, Charles. But you were never there. And even when you were there, your mind was always at work or somewhere else, but never with me."

She's not exactly wrong about that. The season had cost him quite a few nerves and he definitely hadn't been a good boyfriend, and maybe none of this would have happened if he had paid more attention to her. But that's definitely not a justification for what she did. Charles knows his worth. And that's exactly why he clasps Annika's wrists with his thumbs and forefingers to take her hands off him. 

"For not being a good boyfriend, I am truly sorry." He drops her hands. "But that's no reason to cheat. You and I are done." Charles leaves the bedroom and grabs his bag in the hallway before heading for the elevator door. 

"You're leaving? Just like that? Throwing away two years like they never happened?"

Again, his phone vibrates in his pocket. Another message from Y/N, making his heart skip a beat. He grins to himself and types a response that, under different circumstances, he might have thought twice about. But the quicker he replies, the quicker he's out of this place and back to you. 

"I'm not throwing it away, you already did." Charles puts his phone back in his pocket and presses the button to make the elevator come. "I'm letting you stay here because I know how bad I've been to you and that this year hasn't been so easy for you either. But if I need this place one day, for whatever reason, you're out of here. And I don't care where you end up. Find someplace to live. Move back in with your parents. But this," he points to the space between you, "is over. Forever."

Annika runs a hand through her hair, then crosses her arms in front of her chest. "Then I hope for your sake that you treat them better than you treat me."

The elevator door opens, but Charles doesn't move a bit. Instead, he looks at his ex-girlfriend, who stands before him with raised eyebrows. "Who do you mean?" 

"Do you think I'm that stupid? Or blind?" She points her finger at his pants pocket. "The person you just answered immediately."

"And what's so special about that?" he asks, confused. 

Annika takes a step toward him. "You always make everyone wait for you. You make your fans wait for good results, your friends wait for calls. You even make your mother wait for you, because I'm pretty sure she doesn't know you're home yet." Annika stops in front of him. "But whoever that is - that person has all your attention. She doesn't have to wait for you. Let me give you a hint along the way, Charlie."

"Don't call me that. And I don't need your help."

"And even if you did." Annika stretches her arm out, past him, so the elevator door doesn't close. "The fact that she doesn't have to wait for you is good. Don't make her wait for you, too. It's not fair to her. And not to you, either."

As he sits back in the Ferrari - the sports bag and pictures safely stowed in the trunk - he doesn't know what to do with himself. 

Charles made it clear to Annika that their relationship was over, and it had been overdue for at least a month. But what she said at the end stuck. 

He actually keeps everyone waiting, which is why he keeps blaming himself. He could have told his mother he was back in Monaco a long time ago, but somehow he didn't. He could have told you that he's not just Charles, but he didn't, and so he keeps you waiting for the truth that you know nothing about. 

Would you even want to be friends with him anymore if you knew who he was? Or would you want to be friends with him all the more? 

Never, he thinks to himself. That's not who you are. And he can say that even though you've only known each other for a short time. 

And even though you've only known each other for two days, you're all he can think about. He thinks about how you sat together on the grass and talked about his father. He thinks about how you cried at Cars. He thinks about how you flirted with him even though, in your opinion, it wasn't flirting (it was to him, of course; he wanted to know how to win you over for a reason). He thinks about how you told him about your ex-boyfriend and how he would love to beat him up. He thinks of you standing next to each other in the kitchen washing the dishes. 

He thinks of you standing in front of him dressed only in a towel. With bare shoulders and bare legs and that - if he would get the opportunity again - he would not hesitate to pull you into the bedroom and fuck you with his tongue, his fingers or his cock in such a way that he would ruin all other men for you.

Charles closes his eyes briefly to get the image of you on his mind, and then drives off. He would love to drive to the lookout and talk to his father about the situation, but somehow it doesn't feel right without you there. 

But he can't talk to you about it either, because it involves you, and although it would certainly be best, he doesn't have the heart to tell you the truth. Not because he doesn't trust you, but because he's afraid of losing you. 

He slaps his hand against his forehead. "Get a grip, damn it," he says to himself. The two of you haven't even touched, and he's thinking about how he'd take you on every surface in the small apartment. That's just not normal. 

And most of all, it's not fair. You confided in him about your ex-boyfriend because Charles is your friend. And your roommate. And that's what he needs to be to you. 

It wouldn't be fair for him to get into a relationship with you because one, you don't know who exactly he is, and two, he can never be what you need him to be. You need someone who is there for you, who takes time for you. Someone you can laugh and cry with. Not someone who is away most weeks of the year and can't even manage to call his own mother. 

You would always be waiting for him. And even though he doesn't want to agree with Annika, he has to. The whole thing is not fair to you. 

And so he deletes the last two messages he sent you, which you apparently haven't read yet, as he parks his Ferrari in an underground garage and walks the last few meters to your apartment. 

He decides that he is your friend. Only your friend. Because he has to be, and because he can't be anything else. Because you need a real friend, and not a relationship. 

Charles unlocks the apartment door and drops the gym bag to the floor beside him. 

"Charles?" Unlike Annika's voice, his heart starts to beat faster at yours and his palms start to sweat, so he quickly wipes them on his jeans. You come out of the bathroom dressed in dark gray jeans and a white blouse that accentuates your curves. As you stand in front of him, you turn once so he can check you out from all sides. In all his life, he's never seen anyone look so divine. "I'm sorry, I wasn't sure what to wear. I hope that's all right."

His smile is gentle and he hopes you don't notice how hard he has to swallow, and he would have loved to wrap you in his arms and never let you go. But his ex-girlfriend is still clinging to him, and before you touch each other properly for the first time, he wants her washed off.

It's not fair.

"It's okay," he says with a smile and goes to the fridge for a glass of orange juice. You stop by the apartment door next to the gym bag, but don't ask where the stuff is from. And for that, he's very grateful. "I'm just going to jump in the shower and then we can go, okay?"

He doesn't wait for your answer as he pulls new clothes out of his suitcase, walks into the bathroom, undresses, and stands under the hot stream of water. Even now, he keeps you waiting, which further solidifies his decision to keep your relationship purely platonic. While he's shampooing his hair, he makes a deal with himself that he'll do whatever it takes to make this friendship work. Even if that means suppressing his feelings. 

As he leaves the bathroom freshly showered and ready to go, you sit on the couch. He's looking at you, thinking about what Annika said, what he'd like to do with you, and all the things he could lose. And all of that just isn't fair. 

"I'm sorry you had to wait for me," he says softly, reaching for your car key that's on the dining room table. It feels better in his hand than the one from the Ferrari. So familiar. Like the key will fulfill everything he's ever wanted. 

"It's okay," you reply, getting up from the couch. You take a few steps toward him and smile at him, and his heart melts. "I'm fine with waiting."

the messages Charles deleted -

next part

[gildatheplant]

Santiago and his relationship with Armand

OK so I actually wrote most of this as tags to a post that compared Santiago mocking Louis in the restaurant with Louis mocking Santiago after he set the theatre on fire, but I realized I wanted to expand on the idea.

Basically, I had always interpreted Santiago's hatred of Louis as jealousy over him 'stealing' Armand (both in the book and in the show). An interview with Ben Daniels confirmed that while Santiago was initially written as straight, Ben felt the only way Santiago would so viciously hate Louis was if he was in love with Armand. However, in the same interview he also said that Santiago had been in love with his maker, and his jealousy of Louis and conflict over Armand killing his maker made him want to destroy Louis.

After reading this, I was more than a little confused: if Santiago loved his maker, how could he fall in love with Armand?

Then I saw the gifset and was reminded of this moment-

Louis mocks Santiago about his maker's disdain for him, and how his maker abandoned him shortly after he turned him. Santiago loved his maker, but his maker did not love him back.

Now, we aren't given any timeline of events in terms of when Santiago is made, when he joins the Coven and when Armand kills his maker, but I think it's safe to assume it all happens not long after he was turned. So we have fledgling Santiago, bitterly in love with a maker who disdains him, meeting the beautiful and powerful Armand. Armand welcomes him into the Coven, gives him the opportunity to return to his theatrical career, and kills the maker that wounded Santiago's pride and heart. From that perspective, Armand must have seemed like an avenging angel to Santiago- of course he'd fall in love.

For years, Santiago forges his way up the ranks of the Coven, serving Armand and becoming his right hand man and star of the show. The other vampires of the coven practically throw themselves at him, some of the women literally fighting each other over him...but his heart belongs to Armand.

Then Louis and Claudia come into town, and Armand's attention leaves him for this beautiful man that Santiago can't help feeling attracted to too. And Armand lets this newcomer do pretty much whatever he wants, making the execution of Santiago's maker suddenly seem a lot less fair... yet Armand is still the one responsible for pretty much all the opportunities and good things in Santiago's life, and he's still the one Santiago loves and wants above all others.

Just look at his reaction to seeing Armand's photo in Louis' apartment-

There's no anger there, no hate. He's in love. And he wants Armand back.

Santiago must've been thrilled when Armand seemingly changed his mind about Louis and Claudia and agreed to punish them for their "crimes". I suspect, though this is only hinted at in the show, that after the trial, Armand regrets choosing the coven and allows himself to be overthrown by Santiago (Celeste is overheard by Louis saying that Armand was overthrown and there's no reason to doubt her at this point). Now Santiago has (he thinks) everything he wants: leadership of the coven, his rival dead, and Armand seemingly broken and at his mercy. When we see him watching Armand bow his head to him and slip into his coffin, Santiago stares at him with naked hunger, completely ignoring Celeste hanging off his arm.

He thinks it's only a matter of time before Armand will become his lover once more. Instead, Armand frees Louis and allows him to destroy Santiago's world.

[joanquill]

Sherlock with Moriarty's Younger Sister II

What it's like being the younger sister of the Moriartys and meeting Sherlock Holmes. Continuation of "Sherlock with Moriarty's Younger Sister".

A/N: Sorry this took so long :') Tag/s: Fem!Reader, Familial Relationship, and maybe romance? maybe

During your afternoon stroll with Moneypenny, Sherlock was quick to catch you with Watson by his side.

Moneypenny, however, was quick to shut the whole operation, excusing you both by saying you are needed back home.

Sherlock attempted to walk you home, but Watson quickly pulled him back, apologizing for Sherlock's assertive behavior and bid you goodbye.

While walking back home, you couldn't help but laugh while Moneypenny was sighing, advising you not to meet with the great detective so often.

Being alone with a man was dangerous enough, especially with your position as a noblewoman with high society's eyes on you.

You reassured her, saying it will not hinder William's plans and you can take care of yourself and your image.

Unfortunately, it seems this reached the ears of your brothers before you even stepped inside the manor.

You sighed as you braced yourself for your brothers' lectures.

Even police interrogations don't feel as heavy or last as long as this.

Once you confirmed that Sherlock talked to you, Louis made you bathe, saying it was to decontaminate you.

If air fresheners were invented, Louis definitely sprayed your whole body with it, removing every trace of Sherlock on you.

They made sure that you didn't have any cuts or injuries, even though you were just taking a walk with Moneypenny.

You just said he tried talking to you since you were a Moriarty but assured them that you didn't do or say anything suspicious.

Luckily, Moneypenny helped you and took your side.

After that, your brothers let it go but still told you to avoid the man.

Unfortunately, your brothers took it upon themselves to be your bodyguard.

Whether you're walking in the gardens, reading in the library, or even just drinking tea in your room, at least one of your brothers is by your side.

Even the letters or gifts you receive get checked by them, mostly by Louis.

Marriage proposals get burned, shredded, ripped, or straight to the trash. Most of them never even got into your hands, let alone to your knowledge.

Whenever you make a public appearance, Albert is always there and dances with you, leaving no room for other men to ask you to the dance floor.

Some of the noble ladies even coo at how protective Albert was of you, saying how sweet of an older brother he was.

You can only give them an empty smile and stop your tongue from lashing out.

You even tried to deliver lunch to William to get on his good side and hopefully light up the security around you, but it just got the opposite effect.

Now, even his students send you letters and flowers in the mail.

You can only apologize in your head as you watch William prepare their examinations with dark fire surrounding him.

Louis is the one who stays by your side the most, assigning you to the same chores he has.

Whenever he needs to buy something from the market, either Sebastian or Fred goes with you two.

Whenever you feel it's too much, you usually spend time with Fred in the gardens, go for a drink with Sebastian, or have tea with Bonde, Moneypenny, and Master Jack.

They have tried to help you, defending your case, but your brothers are relentless.

Seeing as there is little to no hope of changing their minds, you put on your disguise and decide to run away.

You DID leave a note, though.

But you can only smile when you see Sherlock's shocked expression when you end up on the doorstep of 221B Baker Street.

As much as you hate people using power and money for selfish gains, you can only do so much with your brothers watching your every movement.

You paid Miss Hudson in full for renting a room for three days, which she happily accepted and welcomed you with open arms.

When you got inside, you didn't expect to be staying in the room right next to Sherlock and Dr. Watson's, but it's better than staying in the manor for now.

You jumped onto the bed and sighed, physically and emotionally tired from the day.

Before you could even unpack, you heard someone knocking on the window.

There, you saw a frantic Fred outside, trying to get your attention.

You opened the window and listened to him, but you were determined to stay there until your brothers let you have your freedom--despite how childish it is to run away at your age.

Seeing you were resolved to stay, Fred left to let your brothers know you were safe.

Seeing as you were their new neighbor, Dr. Watson tried to greet you as politely as possible while Sherlock glared at you from behind, earning a smack on the head from Miss Hudson.

You greeted them back with a courteous smile, reassuring them that you would only be staying for a short time.

You did your best not to bump into the two men, keeping to yourself in your room and only leaving to cook, eat, and go to the market.

Sherlock has tried to visit and talk to you, seeing as this is a rare chance to meet the elusive sister of the Moriartys.

But Miss Hudson made sure no one would bother her new tenant while Dr. Watson made sure his book's titular character would not cause a scandal.

Seeing as how your presence was causing trouble (because of Sherlock), you decided to invite them for tea.

As usual, you kept your answers short and precise, not giving Sherlock the answers he wanted while also asking questions yourself.

"For a noble lady, you sure have little to no suitors, huh?"

"Why? Would you like to be one?"

"I have no interest in women,"

"I believe Miss Irene Adler stayed at your place?"

"...And where did you hear that?"

"Gossip seems to travel faster than papers,"

Before you could finish your cup, Miss Hudon walked inside with Paterson behind her.

Your brothers apparently filed a missing person report.

Dr. Watson swore he saw the air around you grow heavy and dark for a split second.

Seeing as they have now gotten the police involved, you said your farewells and went home with Paterson.

Knowing your brothers, they would have sent the MI6 next...

[heyyyharry]

Night Light (from the Flatmate series)

...in which Y/N never turns off her night light.

"Wait for me in my room. It's the door on the right," he whispered to the girl whose name he'd already forgotten. He'd just met her an hour ago as he was leaving the club.

The girl kissed him drunkenly, and when she was gone, he came into Y/N's room to turn the light off. She'd fallen asleep with her book covering her face, so he removed the book, put it on her desk and left quietly.

A/N: I always fall asleep with the light on, and ever since I moved in with my boyfriend, it's become a routine for him to go into my room (we have separate rooms) to turn off the light for me. That was how I came up with this :)

.

.

.

She forgot to turn off her night light. Again.

See, this was why Harry hated sharing a flat with someone else. He had reminded her so many times before to turn it off before she went to bed, but every night, she would doze off with her book still in her hands. No wonder their electricity bill last month was so high. He had hoped that this girl would be less annoying when she slept, but she always managed to find a way to get on his nerves.

After a long moment of standing outside her door (which she left open for some reason), he decided to come in and turn off the light on her bedside table.

In the morning, he reminded her again. She promised she would turn off the light tonight.

She didn't.

~~~

Harry came home late, stumbling into the flat with his arm around the girl. She giggled too loud, so he shushed her and gestured to Y/N's door. The living room was softly lit by the warm light coming from her room, but he knew she was too deep in her sleep to know that he was home.

"Wait for me in my room. It's the door on the right," he whispered to the girl whose name he'd already forgotten. He'd just met her an hour ago as he was leaving the club.

The girl kissed him drunkenly and when she was gone, he came into Y/N's room to turn the light off. She'd fallen asleep with her book covering her face, so he removed the book, put it on her desk and left quietly.

~~~

Harry was in Paris tonight with his friends for Layla's birthday.

Y/N had stopped responding to his messages, so he assumed she had fallen asleep. As he sat on the sofa, drinking cheap wine with his friends while a shitty EDM song was blasting from Louis' Bluetooth speaker, he thought about Y/N sleeping with her light on.

~~~

"You're awake?"

Y/N looked up at him from her laptop, face lit by the cool light from her screen. "Yeah, deadline."

"That's what you get for procrastinating," he smirked.

"Can you procrastinate annoying me? I can't deal with you right now."

"Need help?"

"No, thanks."

"You sure?"

She gave him a dismissive wave. "I'm sure. Thank you. Goodnight."

"Goodnight," he said. "Remember to turn off the light."

"I will."

Harry went to his room and lay in the dark for an hour or so. When he came back to check on her, she had fallen asleep and her light was still on.

~~~

Harry was well aware that he was drunk when he entered the flat as the room was spinning. He didn't know how he managed to make it to Y/N's room without knocking over furniture, but he wanted to give himself a pat on the back.

As expected, she'd fallen asleep, again, with the light on. He sat down on the edge of her bed, not because he wanted to, but because he felt so dizzy that standing only made it worse.

"Goodnight," he whispered to her, hesitated for a moment before turning off the light.

Right after he'd left her room, he went straight into the bathroom to throw up.

~~~

He had been avoiding her all day, for reasons even he didn't understand.

It was 1AM when he came into her room to turn off the light. Before he left, he told her something he wasn't brave enough to say when she was awake. He went back to bed, worried that she might have heard it.

She hadn't.

~~~

Harry tried to be as quiet as he could, but when he came in to turn off the light tonight, Y/N stirred awake.

She blinked sleepily at him. "Hi."

"Hi," he said nervously. "Just gonna turn the light off for you."

"Thank you," she said with a smile.

"Goodnight," he said and switched the light off.

"Goodnight. I love you."

The three words froze him when he turned away. They'd confessed their feelings to each other last night, so why did it still feel like the first time?

"I...love you, too," he said, smiling shyly at her. He was thinking of kissing her before he left, but she'd already buried herself under the duvet.

~~~

"Do you want to cuddle before bed?"

Her bed was warm and smelt like her. He gave her a lot of kisses as she read her book with her head on his chest. When she fell asleep, he reached over to turn off the light.

~~~

Harry came back late for a business dinner today and she was still awake.

"It's already midnight," he said, loosening his tie.

She smiled up from her book. "We couldn't go to bed without you."

He kissed her on the lips and then her baby bump. "I'll take a shower and join you both."

When he returned, she'd fallen asleep. Harry turned off the light and carefully slipped into bed.

~~~

"Ria fell asleep with the light on, again," Y/N complained as she returned to bed from her daughter's room.

Harry chuckled, pulling her into his arms. "Like mother, like daughter. I had to turn off your light for you for years."

"I had my reasons."

"Oh yeah? What were they?" he asked, stroking her hair.

She grinned up at him. "At first, I wanted to annoy you. Then you kept doing that so I didn't bother to turn off the light anymore."

"Why am I not surprised at all?" Harry laughed, but he was glad she'd deliberately done it in the first place. "Now could you turn off the light on your side, please?"

[nalyra-dreaming]

Can I ask if this hasn’t already been asked how Lestat and Daniel get on in the books? Daniel is Louis friend and Lestat knows that but do their personalities challenge each other and do they bicker or are they friends? How do you think it’ll go in the show? I don’t believe Lestat will hate Daniel in the show or anything extreme he might be frustrated at times but I don’t think Daniel would care much about that to be frank haha and would even feel bad at times because possibly Lestat gets triggered remembering his past or sad about Claudia in a different way than Louis gets sad about Claudia (more emotional, possibly lashes out or ruins their interview schedule because of how sad he is deep down, shows up late, etc.). Overall I think they’ll manage okay and by the end have some shared understanding of each other and possibly respect from both sides. I’m expecting comedic moments of Lestat refusing to give a straight answer and Daniel challenging him and Lestat challenging Daniel for doing that but in a funny way. And when Daniel asks about Louis and their time together from lestat’s POV im curious how Lestat remembers that time and how Louis will be seen from his eyes and how Daniel interprets that vs how he interpreted Lestat from Louis and Armand’s POV

Hey!

So as a note: Louis and Daniel aren't friends in the books. That's a show thing. A good thing! But it's not from the books, not really.

Lestat and Daniel... Lestat and Daniel like each other:

"Khayman sat in the downstairs study talking with Daniel now, Daniel who liked to let the hunger build, Daniel who wanted to know all about what it had been like in ancient Miletus, and Athens, and Troy. Oh, don't forget Troy. I myself was vaguely intrigued by the idea of Troy. I liked Daniel. Daniel who might go with me later if I asked him; if I could bring myself to leave this island, which I have done only once since I arrived. Daniel who still laughed at the path the moon made over the water, or the warm spray in his face. For Daniel, all of it-her death even-had been spectacle. But he cannot be blamed for that."

I think Lestat and Daniel might, especially if Daniel is already a vampire for the documentary, a vampire turned (supposedly) "out of spite" by Armand. Daniel, who freed Louis.

I think Lestat and Daniel will get along like a house on fire, actually. Oh, with sparring matches, and challenges, and biting comebacks. But Lestat likes that - and Daniel does, too. I think the more emotional breakdowns (that we saw (maybe exaggerated) hints of) might come through the story itself... and if it is true what Sam hinted at? Then maybe Claudia, there, haunting Lestat.

Because she does, in the books. She haunts Rue Royale, she haunts Lestat, she haunts Louis. She haunts the narrative.

I cannot wait to see what Daniel will drag out of him, actually. I hope it will be a bit sharper and edgier than Daniel in season 2... I had actually expected more of him there, tbh.

But I think Daniel and Lestat will be their own dynamic. Because Daniel likes Lestat, canonically. And I think in the show, he does, too, because he saw beyond the tale that was spun. He called the bullshit. And he knows he has to get to the source.

We know Daniel was already at the concert, so here's a snippet of Daniel at the concert from the books :)

And Lestat was Christ on the cathedral cross. How describe his overwhelming and irrational authority? His face would have been cruel if it hadn't been for the childlike rapture and exuberance. Pumping his fist into the air, he bawled, pleaded, roared at the powers that be as he sang of his downfall-Lelio, the boulevard actor turned into a creature of night against his will! His soaring tenor seemed to leave his body utterly as he recounted his defeats, his resurrections, the thirst inside him which no measure of blood could ever quench. "Am I not the devil in you all!" he cried, not to the moonflower monsters in the crowd but to the mortals who adored him. And even Daniel was screaming, bellowing, leaping off his feet as he cried in agreement, though the words meant nothing finally; it was merely the raw force of Lestat's defiance. Lestat cursed heaven on behalf of all who had ever been outcasts, all who had ever known violation, and then turned, in guilt and malice, on their own kind. It seemed to Daniel at the highest moments as though it were an omen that he should find immortality on the eve of this great Mass. The Vampire Lestal was God; or the nearest thing he had ever known to it. The giant on the video screen gave his benediction to all that Daniel had ever desired.

... I think theirs will be a very fun, and very interesting dynamic^^ Because Daniel has something Lestat wants, to make him open up (namely knowledge about Louis)... and then... 😈

[currentlylivingonaprayer]

my favorite sherliam fanfics

In no particular order

doing one of these again, even though literally nobody is asking for them

~~

https://archiveofourown.org/works/47340676

Garden Of Blood by Kiarrionss and luvviexq

A sherliam hanahaki disease fic, but it's somehow much more painful

Hello Police, Yes, this story right here. *aggressively points at phone* It made me laugh and blush and cry and rethink what love really was and realize that I will never be loved like this in my life. Amazing work. I absolutely loved it. One of my absolute favorites.

~~

https://archiveofourown.org/works/32692183

floriography by jellyfen

Liam becomes the new target of a serial killer. Sherlock is there to help him find out who the killer is.

What would this list be without this story. Ive read it at least 4 times. It's number one on ao3 for a reason.

~~

https://archiveofourown.org/works/41868567

mosaic broken hearts (we learn to live with the pain) by iridescentsung

sherliam may or may not have accidentally adopted a child after they started to live in America and finally sorted everything out between them.

Really, really beautiful and I only recommend it.

~~

https://archiveofourown.org/works/31359539

Laws of Gravity by @glanceart

They survive the fall, battered and on the run. They find themselves at the mercy of a noble whose motives are misled.

I absolutely adore this story. The way both of them are struggling to live on after everything and learning how to deal with the difficulties of living a simple life. It ends on a good note.

~~

https://archiveofourown.org/works/35645362

Hangman's Dilemma by Averylostcause, Cutie_Pi3

Sherlock catches Liam and puts him behind bars, only to realize how much he hates this and teams up with the Moriarty gang to get him out again. Louis tries to stab him multiple times, for realizing it so late.

I just finished this. It's sooooo sweet. Alternativ titel: sherlock just straight up not having a good time for 48k.

~~

I know, there's still so many more and I will add to this list as it continues, but this is it for now.

I don't know why, but somehow all sherliam fanfic seem to make me rethink what love is. Also, it's not a good sherliam fic, if you don't have a case to solve.

As always: if you know any of these authors here on tumblr, please tell me, so I can link them to this post. Please check out their stories and show them the love they deserve.

Also, if you have any sherliam stories you enjoyed, PLEASE TELL ME.

[louisisalarrie]

there’s quite the convo that was going on on twitter today, which is super interesting to me, because it’s brought up often and usually from newer members to the fandom, particularly solos. we’ve been talking about this for years. so… idk, let’s talk.

this convo is of the gist that Larries made Harry and louis stop interacting due to our interest in them being together. we, apparently, are the ones who made either mgmt, or Harry and Louis themselves, entirely separate and go from best friends to absolutely nothing. and when I say absolutely nothing, like… they were so distanced it was ridiculous.

but here’s the thing… if you weren’t around at the time (there’s no issue with that btw!), ziam was the second biggest ship after larry. A bunch of Larries shipped ziam, and a lot of larry antis shipped ziam, as well as ziam having their own following regardless of larry. And yes, I was there, so im fully aware ziam wasn’t as big as Larry, but they were definitely a close second as far as “ships” go. there was also narry, zarry, lilo, and all the others, but larry and ziam dominated.

But… funnily enough, ziam weren’t separating due to a large speculation of them being in a relationship. it was printed and posted in multiple formats that zayn had said in an interview he told Liam to kiss him and he did (early days, yes), and they really gave off relationship vibes for a long time there, but they were still close and interacting very lovingly throughout the entirety of 1d. and regardless of your stance on ziam, they were clearly very close.

The thing with this is, is that gay rumours can be harmful to a fanbase with a demographic of young women, who the idea is to make the band desirable for women to be with to keep them interested etc., we’re all aware of that, but why wasn’t ziam separated? why weren’t all the boys asked to be super straight with each other? why was it so intense with larry?

Because if you don’t have anything to hide, you don’t hide anything. ziam still were carrying on in front of our faces while larry went through a multitude of stunts (that antis and now some solos also believed were stunts), and were so strictly kept apart that it was blindingly obvious something was going on. To make it seem the most real, you’d have all the boys being laddy bro pals with one another. but it was specifically larry who were extremely drastically pushed apart. of course there was no public “fight” printed to give us a reason as to why they became so far apart (that would signal an end to the band and worry etc.) to make sense of it, but they just were forced in their own lanes. anyone with two eyes can see that, and you could easily tell if they hated each other or not. but the small moments they did interact, showed us otherwise.

anyway, it’s very important to note that ziam did not stop being ziam regardless of the rumours, but larry did stop being larry drastically. they’re not homophobes, they weren’t scared of encouraging the rumours (AIMH and all the playful tweets and interactions), but they were clearly separated when larry kept being talked about further down the track. and if you can’t see that, well you may need to reevaluate and use some critical thinking. it’s happened before 1d too, it’s not rocket science.

anyway, sorry for the rant. it’s just frustrating when I see this convo when we’ve had it over and over again. so, for all the newer larries,if you haven’t already, take this into consideration as one of the very biggest pieces of larry evidence we have. because, well, it is. it may seem insignificant as it’s not a “moment”, but rather it’s a long and ongoing piece of evidence that there was something to hide, so they hid it. and they still do.

[ca-suffit]

This antiblack campaign the fandom just tried to kick up again (to avoid talking about the real issue with Nalyra) reveals how powerless they're starting to truly feel now.

They don't have many users left to vilify so they're putting people on blocklists who are brand new (I was here 3 days lol) or not even really in the fandom. That looks goofy and desperate but then it keeps going. DMing strangers to say "the truth" isn't about racism and "talk to me if you really want to know about anything." Everyone's reblogging those blocklist posts now and adding large commentary suddenly, when before they often fully sat it out. They're doing this in a group to look like they have larger numbers and are "revealing" there's a "big secret bullying problem"....except nobody believes them. Because there's plenty of accounts who are out here saying this shit straight to their faces and they pretend we all don't exist. All of this group has to manufacture drama solely because they just don't want to talk about harmful shit they actually do.

Neil has to make an antiblack statement she made suddenly be about antisemitism towards her, Nalyra's antiblackness is "actually" fans upset about shipping and "what's REALLY coming" in S2, showmey0urfangs is always happy to show up with her dumb screencaps and villain monologue nobody asked for so she can make her everlasting outrage about popular black fics and "feminized" Louis sound deeper than it is, Virginia suddenly cries about IRL issues and wants to leave the fandom because she wants to distract from the Nalyra receipts, Keybearer accused another black fan of trolling people and getting accounts suspended on twitter in 2023 when a Marius fan eventually confessed to it and his eternal shame for that means now every black fan except him is a bully (despite nobody talking about this ever anymore except him), chicalepidopterare mocks a black fan for blocking her "because I thought we were supposed to talk about racism" and then poorly tries to frame any retaliation against her to look like bullying ("see, they're misogynistic, they're bullying my art, they're mean for disliking these ships!").

To quote Claudia here, "You must think me an idiot." And the big cherry on top is also how none of these losers can stand to hear any mention of race....in the fandom of the show that nonstop talks about race. They're using very basic (and meant in a gentle, loving way) teasing of Jacob as proof that black fans are racist against Jacob too, black fans hate Jacob's white wife. People hate Lestat for being white too (what?). They can write crap meta all day about Lestat letting Louis "rape" him and only white victims (Lestat) being real victims to the evil black and brown "true" manipulators (Claudia, Louis, Armand) but gentle teasing from black fans about Jacob's haircut is the real racism. Okay lol. Care to tell us again why you think Delainey's Claudia looks "less innocent" now then? This 3D chess you think you're playing isn't playing how you think for anyone else.

I also notice that afaik there's not a single black American in this group. Idek if there's many Americans of any kind in the group. It's been a lot of shaming to black Americans specifically though, again from the show that's focused on black Americans....by people who aren't black Americans.

"There's people pretending to be black so it's okay to keep hating this whole group." It's not enough you already nonstop shit on black fans as it is, now you have to try to angle it as if none of this could be authentic in the first place. Vile behavior. For what? Tumblr isn't even a platform that pays you for whatever clout you have, so really what is the point here. In a small ass fandom on top of it. Some of you have pretty grown kids too, this is extra sad. It makes all the jumping through hoops to coddle Lestat's behavior make sense though, if you're the same kind of person yourself. Anyway, maybe you don't actually know everything because race exists in the real world beyond how Anne Rice wrote about it in her useless books! You make books written by a racist white woman your whole personality and guess what your outlook on life is going to be.

It's been really pathetic to especially watch any fans of color move more to this extreme bullying side as time has gone on. It will never pay off to promote white fandom ideals. These accounts you're trying to cuddle up to aren't even that big. The fandom outside of the tags actually has much more popular posts, supporters, and fics...although that's also half of what this all is actually about, fic numbers. Again, these are grown adults obsessing over this. We could have a whole different fandom if this group didn't exist and keep wanting to gatekeep everything and be the only people who get praise about anything.

It's no surprise that people who worship Anne Rice have major ego problems themselves. It's been fucked up to deal with but the good thing now is that big egos have big collapses eventually and that's what we're starting to see happening now. People are sick of you and able to see through your basic ass manipulation techniques. People just want to have a fandom, they're not here to worship fans who want to be dictators. Nobody is here for your fragility, losers.

[disacurveball]

Saw @thedistortionshallways whipping up a scrumptious IWTV (AMC version) x TMA crossover and thought I’d propose an alternate casting of the regency harem.

Dr. Jonathan Fanshawe as Louis DPDL

You should have guessed this take from #1 Repressed Jfan/Magshawe truther. Nobody matches the level of vitriol towards his ex (Jonah) like this guy. His name would be un-uttered in their home for 23 years until it was pounding in their heads like a jackhammer. “Considering this the severing of our acquaintance” (MAG 127) has the exact same energy as Louis kissing Armand in front of Lestat. His repressed Georgian ass laid down with the Devil and he’s now having a moment. Also, being a little unethical as a surgeon would be a great Louis’s guilt stand-in. As a treat.

Jonah Magnus as Lestat de Lioncourt

While canon Jonah isn’t as flamboyant or volatile as Lestat is….it really comes down to everything always circles back to him. I thought about casting Jonah as Armand because of his tendency to grand-master plan, and allegedly being “forced into this position by his fear of death,” but ultimately from a narrative standpoint he’s in Lestat’s role. He’s the one who puts everything into motion. Jonah has also already had a “You are a killer Louis” dynamic with another Jonathan so…why not the original one too?

Barnabas Bennett as Armand

HEAR ME OUT OKAY? Think about it. When it comes to the Louis/Armand relationship, the crux is Lestat: he’s both their ex and it’s obvious this was a rebound for Louis. Barnabas/Jfan are both connected to Jonah, and both have reason to hate him— Jonah left Barnabas to be alone as Lestat left Armand.

Barnabas is also very much “I’m just a little guy”/not really, in the way he started to just straight up beef with Mordechai Lukas. “After all, what judge would find in his favour over mine?” (MAG 92) is insane. Like Armand, Barnabas also has the problem of never being the first choice from the sheer lonely nature of his statement— “I have no-one whose absence truly pains me.” (MAG 92)

Albrecht von Closen as Daniel Molloy

So my friend has a headcanon of Albrecht being a failed Archivist (hence the books killing him with putting eyes inside him), but what if he survived that? What if he survived his encounter with the supernatural and continued to curate/collect knowledge? Do you see where I’m going.

Mordechai Lukas as Santiago

See: previous mention of the Barnabas/Mordechai beef. Also a Lukas on stage would be funny.

Bonus: Robert Smirke as The Vampire Sam

(“Is that the actual real life playwright Samuel Beckett?”/“Is that the actual real life architect Robert Smirke?”)

[twopoppies]

Haha! Louis absolutely feels like he’s a pretty straight shooting partner when it comes to communication. Willing to talk, probably pretty even-keeled, open about emotions. I mean, even 1D guys said they went to him to talk and he’s said he is pretty open. Now, he may sometimes have to retreat to think before communicating, but that’s pretty normal too. And how you deal with outsiders vs your partner can be different. But I have to think as a partner, he’s probably one willing to talk. My partner is very similar. It’s great but also sometimes feels pressure-y when you’re not ready. Harry though seems like he’s definitely the moody one when it comes to stuff. I can just see the bitchy silent treatment all over him. (So more me in my relationship, ugh, I hate it about myself). Now, absolutely NONE of this means they’re actually overall bad communicators. They’re probably great (my partner and I are A+), but it’s just their style and how they deal with it. Plus, there’s always and forever room for improvement.

Louis has always struck me as someone who is so supportive of others and so willing to lend an ear or a shoulder to cry on, but I’d imagine he has a harder time asking for help, himself. I tend to think people like that close themselves off when they’re struggling and think they can solve their own problems and don’t want to burden anyone else. But under all of that, they really are yearning for someone to take the burden off them sometimes. That lyric “I’m too tired to be tough. I just wanna be loved by you” really felt like a peek into a side of Louis he doesn’t often show.

And I agree. H seems more moody and probably retreats into himself and doesn’t verbalize how he’s feeling in the moment.

Anyway, I do think the two of them really have had to learn how to communicate with each other over the years. I think Harry going to therapy really seems to have opened him up in a wonderful way. I’m sure being in a relationship with him after that was a very different experience.

It’s so interesting how the struggle and desire to communicate has been such an ongoing theme in their music.

[policemanofprincesspark]

Babygate questions:

Do you think Louis might be in a Clay Aiken kind of situation where he was convinced to do IVF with a random woman? Clay Aiken was a gay American Idol contestant who was convinced to fake a baby. He almost went through with it, until he came out the next year after the stunt. They continue the raise the kid together. I wouldn't be surprised if the situation was similar, except they are too far in to organically accept that this happened. The whole marketing of Freddie as Louis' son is very similar to how Simon and his son were talked about. There is a rumor that his son isn't actually his, but that of Silverman and her ex. The ex and Simon continue to remain friends apparently, even though Silverman cheated on him with Cowell. The gay rumors of Cowell predate 1D, so I wouldn't be surprised.

I just looked this up and read a little about it. This is really intriguing. It seems like he just wanted to have a child with someone he was friends with. A lot of older gay men and gay men decades ago did this kind of thing, except without IVF by marrying their female friends and having children with them in order to convince the world that they're straight.

I see the original articles that came out before Clay opened up about his sexuality are honest about Clay doing IVF, so I don't see how this was a stunt to hide his sexuality.

Duncan from Blue did this exact same thing, except he actually had sex with the woman. This was also right after he came out as gay to his mother, and even his mother was confused when he told her he'd gotten his friend pregnant.

I considered this situation with Louis because in the articles about Louis becoming a dad, it states that Briana and Louis were "good friends" and that it was a "surprise" for them. There was even a gay man on a morning show who read the article and saw Louis's face and claimed Louis "looked like he was on his team" (aka saying he thought Louis also looked gay) and that if you read between the lines in the article it's very obvious what's going on, and he said "this is what gay men do; this is what we all do." And... yeah, I agree. I don't see how you can listen to a gay man say all that and still think Louis just got a hook-up pregnant by accident. It definitely sounds as if he and Briana were set up and knew each other a little and decided to have a baby in order to hide Louis's sexuality, as per his own choice.

If that's true, then I just plain don't get it. You're gay, you're afraid to come out of the closet, whatever. But why not, I don't know, have an IVF child with a woman but then raise the kid with your husband as well? That's certainly an option for surrogacy and would keep you in the closet at the same time. Yet there's so much reason to believe Harry hates Briana (see: the song Kiwi and the fact that he kicked Briana and her friend out of his concert one time). Why would he hate her if she was the surrogate mother to his and his husband's child? Just doesn't make sense. Plus they shade babygate too much for me to believe Harry and Louis are raising Freddie, so then what are we left with? Why would Louis have a child to hide his sexuality and then not just... take advantage of that situation by raising the child with his husband? Boom, now they have a child together! Great! Like?

Either Larry isn't real or the kid isn't Louis's. I don't know. Maybe there's a secret third option.

[dashboardcat]

beastars s3 (pt1) thoughts (for old time's sake)

-I didn't love the opening at first but it def grew on me. shishigumi car. reblog. you agree.

-was the energy drink plot in the manga? or did they make it up to kinda try simplify a number of black matket plot lines? bc I will admit a lot of the black market stuff has kinda been "it's always been bad, but it's SO bad now trust us bro" so I don't mind seeing them actually to show what the change actually was

-I don't love how they literally translated sebun's name as seven but alas

-no "be mad legoshi" smh my head. can't the gays have ANYTHING

-Louis's still a giant faggot lmao

-zaguan is apparently also a giant faggot lmao

-the fish eating a bowl of upon is perhaps one of the most unsettling things I've ever seen

-while I was hoping they'd cut kyuu entirely, I do appreciate them name dropping her a little early so she doesn't just pop up out of no where like she does

-HE ATE A BEE

-I don't really love melons dub voice. could be faggier.

-was haru's dream of opening a restaurant in the manga? did they add it to parallel legoshi working in a restaurant?

-I was originally ready to say I didn't like the initial scene with haru's college friends bc I thought that was all we'd ever see of them, but im glad that wasn't the case and we got more of them, including the original manga scene (more or less)

-ngl I hate that they took out legoshi forgetting his own birthday smh

-juno infordmping on legoshi fucking killed me

-my mixed ass is having a hard time taking how they throw the word mixed around seriously lmao

-goofy ass cgi car

-THEY KEPT THE KINKY PARTY LESBIANS LETS FUCKING GO

-damn i thought FOR SURE the season was gonna end on legoshi getting shot but there's still a few episodes left lol

-speaking of, while I did like the scene of legoshi getting shot, I didn't love that they took out the part where legoshi handcuffed him, then let him go

-oh hey they they included a bit abt louis's prosthetic leg acting up. diversity win or smth idk

-even if I don't love melon's voice, they sure did animate that twink well

-LEANNOOOOO 😭😭😭😭😭😭

-immediately following that up with louis talking science with the civet was... a choice... like sure the theme of mixes is there but it's tonally very jarring in a binge watch (which again, they insist on)

-speaking of, wasnt the civet super racist before? hes kinda just some dork now

-legoshi not being able to resist talking stage lighting with the strip club owner lmao

-did... did netflix censor louis picking a lock?? lmao what

-wait how fast did louis's antlers grow back?

-JUST TO LOSE ONE AGAIN???

-lol at the principal telling the drama club "stop doing Adler get some new material"

-WHY DOES LEGOSHI WEAR HEADPHONES LIKE THAT

-oh they DID leave it on a he dead cliffhanger lmao

all in all, all of the great, slice-of-life legoshi making his way through life as an adult type stuff that I loved from the latter half of the manga (and also the jokerfied fruit twink) was there. aside from the aforementioned bit with the leanno scene going straight into something almost entirely unrelated, most of the pacing was pretty decent (even if in hindsight it is kinda funny jumping back and forth between scenes of legoshi experiencing bodily harm and the drama club going "but what about the big playyyy :(")

things haven't gotten too messy yet... now we wait for whenever pt 2 drops to see how bad it gets...

[statementlou]

alright so instagram followers do not equal to fans. gotcha. but then what about spotify listeners. I think that would directly correspond to his music fanbase unlike Instagram which is, well, social media. (and I'm not trying to hate here unlike some but genuinely trying to understand. maybe the noise has gotten to me idk) on one hand, yeah, I do see his growth in the live spaces but then on the other hand, his monthly listeners on Spotify are going down. i remember it being over 4M at a point but now it is down to 2.5M.

and then the other thing, yeah his album did hit the charts but it did not sustain. it hit no. 5 one week and then it was straight out of the charts the next, not even in the bottom end of it but just straight out of it. and same in the uk, no. 1 one week then out of the charts the next. tho it did return twice again to some position but again did not sustain. I think the charting was down to the dedicated part of the fanbase who bought multiple copies to put him there but I think you need the casual part too in order to sustain.

idk, the live thing is still a paradox to all of this. can it be down to just the dedicated portion of the fanbase filling up his special venues like the O2 arena or the big mexico show? i don't think so but i don't know. can it be that dedicated or are there casual fans mixed in there too?

thanks for the thoughtful ask! Spotify listener numbers show the number of individual people who listened to more than 30 seconds of one song by an artist in that month, NOT a follower count. So being on playlists drives those numbers up when you get a lot of people who let a song play through without skipping, whether or not they care enough to click through and check out the artist more, and collabs with bigger artists boost this because when someone just plays that artist's main feed and the song plays through a number gets added to the collab person's total even though, again, the listener probably never went to their page or followed them (this is why Liam's spotify numbers are consistently higher than Louis' for example even though Louis has a bigger fanbase). New music pushes those numbers up; between release times they will go down. Festival appearances may see them go back up as the summer goes on! But probably not significantly is my guess. I suspect individuals looking into an artist and even following them honestly has very little impact on this compared to playlist placement, which is something management/ label pay for and do around release times- and yes, LTHQ do this at those times- which is why his numbers were up, which is why there's a drop off to be seen. But lots of those listeners that have dropped off the monthly counts may still be followers of his account! So they will get notifs for his new music (and his shows) and push those numbers back up when the time comes. As for the charting thing, I... don't find that odd or problematic? That seems consistent to me with his model and not really an issue? When Louis said "I'm not here to compete with the likes of Drake and Ariana Grande. I'm here to make music I love and make my fans proud to say they're a fan," he was saying that he was not going to worry about chasing casual fans. I get that you and a big part of the fanbase disagrees with that decision on his part, that's the whole discourse, but IDK what to tell you: Louis disagrees with you and has literally said so! Louis has been clear in both words and actions that his priority is the dedicated fanbase that makes it possible for him to tour, and that while he is also doing things to see if they work to pull in casual fans and enjoys when he gets the benefits of both, it's not his priority or focus and isn't going to be. The live thing isn't a paradox- it's the point! It's what he has TOLD US REPEATEDLY that he most wants to sustain and he is not only doing that but also growing those audiences- and yes, getting casual fans mixed in as well. Like you point out, in LATAM in particular he gets a lot and he clearly loves that, and we saw him feeding it with the press junket he did in advance of the tour there; when it doesn't require him to change his core project he's clearly happy to see how far he can take it and ride the wave. And he's playing these fests as part of that- so be happy, he's doing what people want! But I think waiting for him to make that the primary priority when he has explicitly said he isn't going to do that is setting yourself up for disappointment. I don't think we will at any point see a shift from his number one priority being the dedicated fans, and I think it would be a HUGE mistake if they did shift that focus to prioritize chasing less sustaining fans.

[murfpersonalblog]

IWTV S2 - Three spicy/spoilery reviews

The reviewers are just saying whatever they want, I guess! O_O

Here's my favorite bits from TheWrap, ComicBook, and IGN.

I've decided to mix and match them, comparing what they each say about similar themes/topics/reveals.

ELEVATING THE SOURCE MATERIAL

TELL IT! It's about adding DEPTH, y'all, not just a 1:1 page-to-screen.

Intellectual horror, instead of psychological horror--fascinating.

An "even more authentic adaptation" -- WE BEEN KNEW!!! I roll my eyes at book stans who hate on the show, acting like the movie was more accurate just cuz it was set during slavery times with white actors. 🙄 Like PLEASE, there's so much missing from the movie, or glossed over, or straight up changed, that the show-antis just demonstrate how shallow they are when their every attack hinges on the timeline/race/age changes. Cry harder.

MORE elevated than Season 1--you love to see it.

Yaaas, bring on the petty melodramatic mess, and fierce performances! 👏

CLAUDIA & MADELEINE

Because Bailey used profanity to convey her agony being a woman trapped in an adolescent's body in S1 too, I'm assuming Delainey will just cuss more? But cussing is all over the show, so I don't get it.

Everyone keeps raving about Roxane as Madeleine, but they've been SO CLOSE-LIPPED about her scenes, and it's KILLING me. 😭

"Deeply willful around Louis"--yeah, we saw a glimpse of that in the trailer; it's what he deserves. Give 'em hell, Claudia!

And yeah, she's PISSED that they cast her as Baby LouLou--imagine, being infantalized, and given the name of the father you've already gone through so much to emancipate yourself from as a "Brother" instead of "Daddy Lou." 😒 Eff Louis--where's Claudia's scythe at!?

LOUIS / LOUMAND

"Nonsense--" TheWrap isn't holding back a single punch huh?

"dating show contestants feigning authenticity to clumsily present themselves in the best light--" oof. 💀

Holy god; "begging the question...if Louis has just traded one abuser for another" GO AWF! 🚩🚩🚩

DANIEL / DEVIL'S MINION

Wow, so this must refer to Episode 5 from the episode titles list released recently. "Genuine horror".... 😈

RIP. 💀 Youngmaniel might see some action, but Oldmaniel's "utterly allergic and adversarial;" OOF. 💀💀

ARMAND

They keep saying petty. 😅 These messy queens are a trip!

"Far more powerful" -- I am SEATED~! I wanna see THE coven master!

Yaaas, come through Children of Satan/Darkness acolyte! 😈

"Scarred and transformed by the same man" -- they sound like war veterans. U_U

LESTAT / LOUSTAT

"the show's primary villain--" say it louder. Book stans need to stop projecting post-IWTV Lestat the hero/protagonist/MC into the narrative that LOUIS is telling, as a guy struggling to get over his ex.

"There to berate him for his poor choices--" this tracks with the trailer released today, too, where the producers said Dream-Stat would "pass judgement" on Louis' pisspoor actions.

PRODUCTION (Sets, Costumes, etc)

Yes, IWTV S1 was absolutely gorgeous; their attention to detail was immaculate. And so far it looks like S2 is gonna be just as nice. I REALLY like what I've seen of the Threatre's aesthetic.

THEATRE DES VAMPIRES & SANTIAGO

I freaking love this. XD

Agreeing with him about WHAT though? 🤨 That Louis & Claudia are hiding things? Or that they deserve to die because of it? (Especially since Lestat is OBVIOUSLY not actually dead, so what "crime/rules" are they actually breaking, Lord Kangaroo Court?)

TALAMASCA & CRITIQUES

Thank you lord god kamisama flying spaghetti monster he's a Talamascan, not another secret vampire.

But now I'm nervous, thanks to the ComicBook review:

Uh oh. The Talamasca feels forced & out of place. 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️

The AVENGERS INITIATIVE. 💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀

But they say it feels like "Daniel's being recruited--" YES PLEASE. 🙏 If Daniel's not gonna be a vampire, at least let him be a Talamascan. Ain't no way he can return to the mundane world after all this.

My BIGGEST complaint about IWTV as a franchise is its tenuous connection to the Immortals Universe. AMC is dropping the ball hard on creating an ARCU--Anne Rice's Cinematic Universe. There are SO MANY immortals & supernaturals we should've BEEN seen in S1, walking the streets of NOLA. I will say this every time: Oncle Vervain Mayfair should've been brought in from the OG pilot script. We should've seen Louis go to him for gris-gris before the poker game, and introduce Lestat to Vervain as a practitioner of what Louis thought was "European voodoo." Also: we should've seen Lasher. There should've been a scene where the Mayfairs told the vampires to GTFO their territory, and keep their hunting grounds on the other side of town. Like, the Mayfair Witches show sucks like you wouldn't believe, it's so stupid (looks gorgeous though), but the WORLDBUILDING is ripe for the taking! And AMC did squat with it!

Like, tbh, I don't see the point of a whole Talamasca show, and if it's handled by Esta & the gang from MW, then I don't wanna see it--I WILL, ofc, but I won't WANT to. Especially since we haven't seen any ghosts. ISTG, PLEASE have Merrick Mayfair in Ep7 or Ep8--not only will that bridge IWTV with MW, but it can perfectly lead to Blackwood Farm., while keeping the threads between vampires, ghosts, AND the Taltos (if they're determined to do a Lestat/Rowan crossover from Blood Canticle 🤢🤮).

I was wondering why so many reviews were giving it 4/5 or 9/10, like wtf are y'all being so stingy for!? But if this is the problem, then I'm not surprised, I've been complaining about it the whole time.