#lots of very normal emotions to be having over an alternate version of my gay angel doing a silly german accent

[worldsokayestdragon]

I do love apocalypse world Cas being so deeply fucked up and evil. real Castiel is one of the kindest and most loving characters on the show. his years on earth since the apocalypse have changed him from someone dedicated to a duty to heaven into an extremely compassionate person. alternate Castiel has also left behind that stoic sense of duty, but has become warped and gleefully cruel.

and what's the difference between them? Dean Winchester! real Cas gripped Dean tight and raised him from perdition and then he started to love Dean and then he learned to love all of humanity. without Dean's influence apocalypse Cas is every bit as dismissive and condescending towards humans as any of the other angels.

Hester said the very touch of Dean corrupts, but it's just the opposite. it redeems, if uplifts, it sanctifies. from the moment Castiel laid a hand on him in hell he was saved.

[legless-fish-on-rollerskates]

All the morons trying to claim that Dean wasn't saying anything to Cas because he was holding back slurs or something equally ridiculous... what show have you been watching? Surely not Supernatural. Like, yeah, Dean had some internalized shit for a while (mostly cause of how he was raised, let's be real), but this isn't season fucking one. Dean's in his goddamn forties now guys.

But you still think Dean Winchester is homophobic? Let's examine the evidence then, shall we?

1. Aaron Bass: Dean was flustered because he's not used to being hit on by dudes, but he was completely respectful. And he was alone, too. It wasn't like he was trying to "hide his homophobia" from Sam. He could've said whatever he wanted in that moment without anyone ever knowing, and he chose to awkwardly walk backward and wish Aaron a nice day. Then later, when they're working with him, Dean says nothing about it (other than a quick "he was my gay thing" to Sam), doesn't make it weird, and talks to him exactly the same way he would talk to anyone else.

2. Jesse and Ceasar: Dean's surprised when he realizes that they're married, again because he's not really used to it and so he made the wrong assumptions (which I will point out is really really normal, it happens all the time even between queer people, because heteronormativity is very much a thing in real life). But what does he do when he finds out? He asks them about their marriage - with genuine curiosity. What's it like to be in a relationship with a hunter, is it hard, all that jazz. Never asks about the fact that they're both men, none of those gross "so who's the woman" questions, literally just. Talking to two married hunters. That's it. Then later, when they're working, he never once questions their capability as hunters or suggests that they're weak in any way. There's no "you're less 'manly' because you're gay" mindset at all. And at the end of the episode he's genuinely happy for them, two hunters who managed to get out of the life and retire together.

There's lots of other examples (several male cops have been obviously into him over the years, his reaction to Jody talking about Claire and Kaia, all the subtext surrounding Lee, etc.) but for my last one for now, let's not forget...

3. Charlie fucking Bradbury: Arguably Dean's best friend besides Cas (no I haven't forgotten about Benny, I love Benny, but he was part of a very specific chapter of Dean's life and that chapter is done). We've known she was a lesbian from the get-go, and Dean takes it in stride when he finds out, immediately improvising to coach her through some painfully awkward flirting so she can get into the office ("you've just come home, and Scarlett Johansson is waiting for you"). And yes, there's the whole "I feel dirty" "yeah so do I" bit there, but that's clearly established as a joke, plus the guy was gross - as someone who is attracted to both women and men, I would feel dirty after flirting with him too.

The next few times we see Charlie, she and Dean are geeks and dweebs together, Dean is having more fun than we've seen in years, and we see him be a really good friend - in some ways, a better friend than he is to Cas. Charlie talks to him a little bit about girls, they LARP, they go shopping together, Dean comforts her when she has to let go of her mom. When she's killed, he gets so upset he goes on a murderous rampage (maybe not the most healthy way to deal with greif, but nonetheless showing how much she mattered to him). When he sees an alternate version of her in trouble he's immediately ready to risk his own life to help her even though she doesn't know him. He loved her like a sister, and he never once expressed any issues with her sexuality.

So let's go back to Cas. Cas is in love with Dean. Not much of a surprise there, he's said it before. But this is the first time Dean understands that that's what he's saying. It makes sense that he's a little stunned, especially considering that Cas is also saying that he's about to die. I mean, if your best friend of twelve years told you one day that they've been in love with you all along, that just knowing you has irrevocably changed them for the better, and that also by the way telling you this means they're going to die, mightn't you be rendered a tad speechless?

Dean does not hate Cas for this. Not at all. Because whether or not Dean is bi, whether or not he reciprocates, Cas is still his best friend. We've seen how hard Dean grieves every time Cas dies. We know how much Cas matters to him. Of all the shit they've put each other through, there's absolutely no logical reason for this to be the thing that damages their friendship beyond repair. Not after everything. No fucking way.

Dean says nothing because he doesn't know what to say, because he's still processing Cas's confession but also already grieving and blaming himself for Cas's death. The way he breaks down at the very end of the episode? That's not a man who's disgusted. That's a man who's shattered.

How dare you try to simplify this incredibly complex and emotional moment into Dean being a dick. How dare you. It's positively insulting. The entire point of Cas's speech was that Dean is so much more than that. If you can't see that, than I'm sorry, but you're missing the whole message of the show.

Supernatural is about family and sacrifice. It's about free will, making your own choices. And it's about being more than just who you're supposed to be, going beyond what other people want or assume. All the depth beneath the surface. That's the show. That's why we're still watching after all this time. Because it means something important. Something relevant. Something real.

Don't you fucking discredit that.

(thank you for coming to my TED talk)

[oviids]

pls share some of your spn fic recs 🥺🥺

ok, a few things first:

followers and mutuals who do not have supernatural brainworms, kindly avert your eyes

i don’t normally rec or even read much fanfic any more but this is a CRISIS ok (cont.)

there is so. much. content for deancas out there and i have incredibly high standards, several ancient ao3 bookmarks, can speedread, and want to spare you guys the experience of wading through it all.

i also have a section for spn femslash since I was pretty into that back in the day (sadly a lot less fan content for this :/)

I don’t really like au’s or pure smut (I honestly usually just skim or skip those scenes) so if you’re mainly looking for that kind of thing this probably won’t be very helpful to you. jsyk.

i’m not great at describing stuff but i’ll do my best, i’ll also try and add tw’s when neccesary.

i wil try and keep updating this with any other decent fics i find, feel free to rec stuff too since i’m like 7 years behind.(edit 1/25/21) this is getting looooong so i’m going to start making another list on my spn blog rather than update this one

(edit 1/3/21) since this has gotten pretty long i’ve added rating/approximate word counts and marked my particular favorites with an asterisk.

Dean/Cas fic:

So Says The Sword*** - explicit/85k. FUCK its good...au/time travel where dean is not pulled out of hell by cas and says yes to becoming the michael sword. honestly could serve as an alternative to actually watching the show, if you want to get into dean/cas without actually doing that to yourself.

Fata morgana.*  - teen/6k, pst s9 finale. very bela centric and i love it, she finds cas looking for dean in hell.

Redemption Road -misc/600+k. an incredibly long fic from a collaborative writing group back in the day. canon divergent from the end of s6 on, has a cool take on godstiel and the leviathans, as well as the lovecratian mythos connection. ngl when i reread it i only made it about 28% in but imo the casual reader can actually stop around there, the rest concerns a lovecraftian apocalypse that is still good (i think i don’t remember it very well) but not required to enjoy the first half. if you prefer i have an ebook version i can send you on gdrive.

Someone Who's Feeling For Me* - mature/45k, s12. they run into lisa braeden and dean thinks cas is into her while cas thinks dean still likes her. treats lisa way better than the show ever did and the miscommunication is pretty funny rather than annoying.

a turn of the earth - mature/95k. time travel fic where cas from s10 keeps showing up in deans life from a few years before s1 to right before the hellhounds take his soul.  slow burn, good character study, and at one point cas punches the dad in the face and it rules.

On the Wings of War - teen/85k, canon divergent s5. dean accidentally becomes the Horseman of War. plays fun, fast and loose with biblical lore, michael has some rights.

Named - mature/95k, alternate s5. EXTREMELY blasphemous in a fun sexy way. manages to predict metatron almost to a T. there’s one major character death and its literally jesus christ, everyone is very sad about it and it sets the rest of the story rolling. an alternate interpretation of cas’ mission to raise dean from hell which had me on the floor. ngl its kind of misogynistic at points, but its from 2010 and tracks with late oughts-2010 spn (sorry anna the author did you dirty here:/).

The Girlfriend Experience - explicit/15k. uhhh i don’t normally rec or even read smutty stuff unless someone i know is specifically asking for it but this has stuff like sam trying to be a good ally and dean thinking holding hands with cas is ‘kinda gay :/’ minutes after having gay sex with him.

i crippled your heart a hundred times - explicit/19k, s8. cas confesses his feelings and dean spends a long time getting his head out of his ass about it. truly hits different after the actual confession, despite being written six years early it feels like its actually what could have gone down more or less if the writers weren’t talentless demons who hate us.

My Roots Take Flight** - mature/125k. reverse au where cas is a hunter and dean’s an angel...OR IS IT???? an alternate retelling of s4. tw for briefly being set in a psychiatric hospital/the hospital being mentioned somewhat frequently throughout the fic, plus more references to torture in hell and heaven than usual.

The One Thing You Can't Lose* - teen/4k.you know those posts about how cas is a super-strong super-tough ancient warrior but he just lets dean tug him around because he likes it? thats it thats the fic.

Hands, From Which All Things Are Built - teen/14k, post s8′s ‘goodbye stranger.’ cas is on the run with the angel tablet but keeps in touch with sam and dean by text, he and dean still manage to be terrible at Actual communication.

Autrement, Danger - or, The Account of an Exceedingly Long Day - mature/30k, post s11. a monster that takes the appearance of your soulmate leads to some wild miscommunications and dealing with years of repression, also dean gets to see cas’ true form which is always cool. tw for non-graphic mentions of underage sexual assault/sex work.

Down to Agincourt - mature/explicit/900++++k, endverse continuation. endverse!cas survives his encounter with lucifer and discovers another time-displaced dean from s7. i’ve only read the two of four parts but its really good, veeeeery slow burn, has a lot of fun oc’s and takes a rather surprising but (imo) entertaining and intriguing turn into Hellenic history and mythology. usual tw’s for endverse/endverse!cas but nothing graphic, it’s actually pretty light-hearted (relatively speaking of course).

Nothing Equals the Splendor** - explicit/8k, THEE finale fix it fic you’ve been waiting for! posits that the entire final episode was just a (very bad and lame) djinn’s vision.

like moses and batman and james dean - explicit/31k, post s8. explores dean’s trauma and internalized homophoba from his technically canon experience with sex work and its impact on his relationship with cas. the sex work itself isn’t really shown in any detail but it’s still a relatively heavy fic.

Crazy Diamonds - explicit/25k, s4/alternate s14. fresh-out-of-hell dean and dean from 10 years in the future are displaced from time and sent to each other’s present.

where the weeds take root - explicit/30k. au where the men of letters kick them out of the bunker and they accidentally move out into the country, get over their codependence and semi retire. featuring chicken coop building, sam volunteering at a dog shelter, gardening, and blissfully mundane domesticity.

No Resting Place - teen/6k. djinn dream fic, switches back and forth between cas’ dream of being married to dean and retired from hunting to the aftermath when he wakes up. tw for brief mention of suicide since, y’know, djinn dream.

any port in a storm - mature/52k. post s8 finale. cas and dean have to pose as a couple going through a rough patch for a case and actually deal with their emotional baggage, cas struggles with being human and metatron is up to stuff.

all this and heaven too* - explicit/7k. in the author’s own words ‘...a love letter to every trans person who ever projected onto Dean Winchester.’ absolutely unzipped me emotionally and theologically, its just. so good. tw for very brief mentions of internalized transphobia/dysphoria.

Because it is* - mature/6k, finale fix it. killing chuck does not bring back anyone back and the winchesters spend a very long time dealing with what they’ve lost, cas and dean SOMEHOW still manage to have signifigant communication issues even after the confession. tw for suicidal thoughts/brief attempt.

Vena Amoris and Other Old-Fashioned Bullshit* - teen/4k, s6. when cas fell for dean it automatically soulbonded/angel married them, shenanigans ensue when dean finds out during the angel’s civil war. funny and actually written back when s6 was airing so cas is still (or at least pretending to be) kind of an OP asshole which is fun.

Rinse, Repeat - teen/3k, s8. angsty character study of cas as he’s reprogrammed and trained to kill dean. not really dean/cas since its just cas’ pov of canon events but its beautifully written and ends with him snapping out of it through the power of love (also now a canon event!).

Emergence - explicit/59k, canon divergent after s11. dean meets a hunter he only recognizes as their friend claire novak’s missing father, but soon realizes he might be the answer behind the mysterious void in his memories and feelings (aka everyone’s memories of cas are completely wiped away for three years).

Cuckoo And Nest - explicit/10k, early established relationship/character study, cas tries to figure out how he fits into dean’s life and space in the bunker.

Build a Home* - teen/20k, canon divergent s12. sam and eileen are cute and turn the bunker into men of letters/hunters hq and everyone but cas moves in, mutual miscommunication issues and pining ensues.

Down in the River - teen/5k, early s8, cas prays to dean in purgatory while sam and dean try to figure out a way to get him out.

Teaching Poetry to Fish* - mature/52k, ?? BC through the entire series/canon divergent s14 and 15. retelling of crucial scenes throughout the shows timeline from cas’ pov, feat. actual fish and poetry.

the minor fall, the major lift - gen/4k, post confession/finale fixit. dean goes into the empty to save cas and runs into several old friends (and enemies).

With the Kisses of His Mouth* - teen/3k, gen later seasons. dean and cas keep kissing by accident.

Remaining Grace - explicit/109k, alternate s6. au where cas asks dean for help with raphael and dean, of course, does. tw for temporary major character death/semi-graphic depictions of alcohol withdrawal.

The face of heaven.* - teen/10k, au, dean is a regular guy and cas is a fallen star (think ‘stardust’, kinda).

Stories Are Made of Mistakes*  - teen/5k. newly human cas has trouble getting used to a human body and humanity in general, but still figures out that he and dean are A Thing before dean does.

Hurry Up And Wait - mature/21k, canon divergent s12. a fairyland and quite possibly LOTR related case comes up and dean goes full fanboy, mary is introduced to the wonders of the peter jackson adaptions, many references and comparisons (including between cas and dean’s ‘friendship’ and arwen/aragon). also charle is still alive and has just been doing fairy stuff this whole time.

There Are Many Things - explicit/28k, s9. cas is extremely lonely/touch-starved and trying to figure out this whole human thing, as well as where he and dean stand after being kicked out of the bunker.

It's A Long Life to Always Be Longing - teen/40k, post s11 finale. amara helps dean by putting him in a magical coma so he can finally get some much needed rest and show him possible futures for him, sam and cas. meanwhile sam and cas go on a roadtrip (or several) to find componets for a spell to wake dean up. really good sam and cas friendship, they actually talk about their shared lucifer trauma and stuff.

Non-Photo Blue - gen/2k, s4/5/alternate s5. fifty moments from cas’ memories of dean.

Tall Grass - explicit/57k, canon divergent post series. cas becomes the ultimate plant dad. feat the wayward sisters gang, cathartic character growth, fun oc’s, domesticity, and lots of actual botanical info-dumping.

on vessels - no rating/gen/2k. established dean/cas, cas tells dean about how he used to imagine what it would be like to have him as his vessel.

search for tomorrow on every shore* - teen/11k, post-finale (extremely derogatory). some angels in jack’s new heaven act out and dean gets temporarily resurrected in 2003 and runs into his younger self.

Architecture of the Minotaur’s Heart - explicit/45k, very canon divergent post s1. dean’s new house seems to have a life and mind of its own, while in his dreams he sees glimpses of a world and apocalypse that never came to be and an angel that looks strangely like his mysterious neighbor, cas. loosely inspired by the book house of leaves (which i highly recommend for fans of weird horror).

The Distance Of The Setting Sun - explicit/17k, post s5. established dean/cas relationship, team free will finally takes advantage of cas’ abilities to go on vacation around the world.

diamond star halo - teen/5k, s11. dean lets cas use him as a temporary vessel while he recovers from rowena’s spell, sam is a long-suffering third-wheel.

Make Known** - teen/16k, s6/7. dean struggles to understand how cas could have become his enemy and whether he ever truly knew him in the first place.

blunt little instrument* - mature/1.4k, post finale. dean finally confronts his father in heaven, very cathartic.

my heart a compass*** - teen/10k, post confession. the empty forces cas to re-experience his most regretted moments while dean tries to snap him out of it and bring him home.

A Crash Course in Someone Else's History - teen/11k, s6. cas from the very start of s4 is brought forward in time by s6!cas to distract the brothers from his and crowley’s plans.

The Cuckoo Father - mature/8k, s7 au. the woman who found cas in the river post-leviathans does not marry him bc he was sent to her by god or whatever, but actually identifies him as jimmy novak and sends him back to claire and amelia.

The Dead Dean Clause* - teen/5k, post alt s5 ending. team free will celebrates surviving taking down lucifer by getting blitzed, cas lies to a cop and gets an impromptu driving lesson. title/description sound dark i know but it’s actually very funny and light.

Suck It, Judy Garland - mature/20k, s12 (after the ‘i love you...i love all of you’ episode). cas and sam have to pretend to be a couple for a case and dean is NOT happy about it.

By Daylight and In Dream - teen/16k, s5. pre-dean/cas, dean invites cas to use his dreams to hide from the other angels. tw for very brief mention of a memory/dream of alastair sexually assaulting dean.

The Five People You Meet in Heaven - mature/22k, post-canon. an actually happy (if sometimes bittersweet) heaven endgame written several years ago, though some details are rather eerily similar to the show’s ending.

heaven is a place on earth* - teen/2k. dean’s pov of some of the times cas left him behind throughout the show, and one alternate ending where he finally gets to stay.

I Cleanse The Mirror - teen/20k, alternate s6. dean’s body is stolen by an ancient elemental and his soul has to hitch a ride in cas’ vessel.

an exploration of gender; angelic*** - mature/4k. *oscar isaac voice* lets get into angel gender politics!! aka cas is trans.

Zenith - explicit/33k, s9. after 9x06 an angry witch curses cas with the ability to see supernatural beings and human souls.

La cucina. - gen/3k, alt s9. dean goes wild helping a newly-human cas find out what kinds of food he likes, or the early s9 domesticity we deserved!

Dean Winchester, Cocksucker at Rest***** - teen/7k, post-finale. john and mary finally come over for dinner and john reacts to dean/cas in a rather predictable fashion. SOOOOOOOOO good omg, its so funny and a little sad and very very cathartic. part of a series that has a few other really good short fics.

The Way You Didn't Go - teen/5k, s15. coda to 15.09, dean has nightmares about the moc!cas timeline.

On Drowning - teen/28k. dean saves cas after he nearly drowns, they both try and deal with the physical/mental fallout (aka the fic where thee iconic “you only touch me when you think I’m dead or dying” originates). tw for realistic depictions of drowning/triage/misc medical information.

The Thirty-Six Questions That Lead to Love* - mature/13k. claire has dean and cas pretend to be her gay dads for a case and they play the titular 36 question game, get mistaken for swingers, and birdwatch, among other things.

Assorted F/F stuff:

Deep Breaths* - mary/ellen, au where mary said no to azazel’s deal and let john stay dead, still becomes a milf.

Like Rebel Diamonds - krissy/claire, they become hunter gf’s on the hunt for cas to kick his ass for taking jimmy. not-so-stealth dean/cas as well.

To Ash and Bone - anna/ruby, same author as the previous fic (p much all of her stuff is good from what i recall). au where ruby is a witch and helps anna when she’s cursed.

Holy Clockwork Angels - jo/ruby, STEAMPUNK au with very cool worldbuiilding.

At Day's End - jo/anna (my fucking KINGDOM for more jo/anna content, the dean/cas parallels are allllll there), au where they are both at the camp in the endverse and gfs.

these posts - ok so not actually a fic but i’m now obsessed with this hannah/meg dynamic.

Tagelied - mary/ellen, the true story of how ellen got into hunting before angels interfered.

Hell's Bells** - meg/abaddon, alternate s8/9 where meg survives crowley’s attack with sam’s help and teams up with abaddon (who she has a sk year old crush on) to take back hell.

The Ecstasy of the Rose - anna/ruby, anna travels back in time to escape heaven and becomes a signifigant part of ruby’s old human life.

Angel Underground - anna/jo, kind of an urban fantasy au with a very intriguing premise (sadly its very short, i’d love to see more if this ‘verse).

Clover, Flame - billie/mary, billie was always the reaper that showed up to take mary after her death(s) over the years.

Drag Me To Heaven - anna/ruby, a variant on the ‘last night on earth’ thing with dean.

Come Home* - jo/anna, canon-divergent au where anna is the new waitress at the roadhouse and helps jo set up a (probably not really) haunted house for halloween.

[boypussydilf]

Shusumi for the relationship ask game

i dont know how you even found my blog but thank you *kisses your hand like a prince meeting a princess*

describe their canon relationship/dynamic

oh , you know. sumi is lonely and full of Emotions but doesn’t even know That let alone why she feels it and then a cool guy shows up and is Nice To Her and she goes omg!!! [latches onto him for reasons barely related to Who He Is As A Person] and akira goes Oh another person who wants to use me as a sounding board for their internal monologue. sounds fun :) This probably sounds mean, and almost DEFINITELY is not the dynamic the writers Intended for them to have, but i like it i think its really funny

legit sumi just wants someone to look up to and to rely on and akira was either blessed or cursed by god with a special talent for Being Relied On. she wants to feel like someones helping her and hes happy to help anyone. etc

your ideal/headcanon version of it? how does it differ from how it is in canon & why is this your favorite version? any other alternate versions of it you enjoy?

you know ive thought about royal trio and ive thought abt akesumi friendship but i dont think abt Just These Two that much.

first of all RIP to the person who sent this if they come back hoping for some Clearly Romantic ShuSumi Takes but to me they are like siblings. sumire doesnt Realize theyre siblings but akira is just constantly taking new younger siblings under his wings and she is included. theyre siblings in a very drastically different way from akira & futaba though akira and futaba are loud and obnoxious and chase each other around sojiros house like a couple of grade schoolers and sumi is not completely barred from that but her and akira are more like. they meet up and sumi talks about her Life and her Feelings and akira gives her Just Enough Advice To Be Helpful Without Being Pushy and then they, like, look at college application forms together or something. its practical, i guess is what im saying. akira Sometimes bullies and pesters her (affectionate) but her reactions dont tend to be very strong so its not as fun.

im Neutral on genuinely romantic shusumi, to me they are not that interesting as a ship and also they are both gay in the wrong direction and also they are big brother little sister mode, but i do exist in a state of absolute fascination with like. comphet shusumi. literally sumire is going I want a Perfect Life and that means Living Stereotypical Heterosexual Romance Tropes :) and she thinks she has found her opportunity here and is telling herself Yes i am IN LOVE! this is what that is! I cannot conceive of a version of the akira from my brain who doesnt know full well hes gay but if he somehow didnt wouldnt these 2 cringefail straight dating living their ridiculously played-straight damsel in distress & noble hero story be the funniest thing ever. And by that i mean fascinating and a torment labyrinth i wish them luck escaping

Also i think they are getting along fine and normal the way they are but like. sumire “used to relying on other people A Lot” yoshizawa and akira “just wants to help people. A Lot” kurusu. They can either have the perfect friendship that is exactly what sumi needs where he has the right level of involvement to help her gain confidence in herself while still knowing she can turn to someone for help. Or go straight off a cliff into bizarre codependency.

Basically I like it when things have the potential to be kind of fucked up. But they aren’t these guys are normal. They just sit in leblanc telling each other dad jokes. Akira buys a wallet just to put a comically large collection of photos of sumi’s greatest achievements in them and proudly show it off to his friends. She gradually goes from reacting to him experiencing something Comically Bad but Harmless like tripping over something with giggling immediately deliberately stifled by SORRY IMSOSORRY ARE YOU OKAY, to just openly laughing at him and he pretends to be annoyed but he’s happy about it.

what do you like about their relationship, why is it interesting or enjoyable to you?

I like Akira World’s Most Big Brother Moments #227. i like all the different winding pathways the concept of Them can go down bc i like having things to pick apart and analyze and look at from hundreds of different angles. i like. the video game persona 5 royal

what about the individual characters involved? what does this relationship mean to them, what makes it unique among their relationships?

No matter what, like. Sumire at the point in time where they meet NEEDS this, i think. Her sister just Died and she doesn’t really know it but she’s trying to figure out her place in the world Without her and also if the fact that most shujin students seem to dislike her is anything to go off of she doesn’t really like, have friends? She needs like. A hand to help her up. Someone To Lean On. Sort of like how Becoming Kasumi was not, like, The Best Solution To Her Problems, but was really helpful in getting her through that period of her life. & now she has someone who will listen to her and help her unconditionally and that is Great for her. She looks up to Akira she admires him she is eternally thankful & grateful to him. And also is convinced she’s in love with him

As for akira i . </3 For most of the time they know each other she’s kind of Just Some Girl He Knows. he definitely cares about her a lot & they have the chance to get closer in third sem what w her being Herself again & she Is part of his Little Sibling Collection. but i cant think of anything akira is getting out of this relationship aside from general Human Socialization. he just want to protect it want to see it grow up healthy (i say that a lot huh.)

favorite interaction they have in canon

Zero interest in them as a couple but sumis romance route IS one of the best things in all of p5 just for the scene where akira leans on leblancs counter Like That and stares at her just to be a Nuisance

favorite interaction they have in your head/a situation you want to put them in

oh god oh fuck i dont know uhhhhh. I think THEY should bully akechi together. I think sumi should get mad at akira. Not for anything in particular i just think sumi has the potential to be very mean if she will allow herself to Feel Negative Feelings and i like conflict between friends. Sumire tries to teach him gymnastics and he forgets hes not in a palace and does something stupid and embarrassing like faceplanting into a wall for no reason and shes very polite about it at first but in the long run she will not let him live it down. umm. thats it. i like them <3

[tiktaalic]

since you're the ceo of gay dean, do you have any fic recs? i have trouble finding anything good besides yours, ao3 user saltyfeathers and wtf gay little jack :(

ceo of gay dean??? oh boy the gay dean economy must be in shambles if that’s me. and i don’t have any specific recs, sorry! idk if you’ve already checked the gay dean tag on ao3? i sorted by kudos and excluded That pairing but oof these pickings look slim... i personally dont read aus (and havent read any of the fics that i’m about to link so i can’t vouch) but here r some canonverse works in the gay dean tag. cut for length

dean winchester really needs to make some gay friends - “Like, I’m trying to think if I’ve had, I don’t know, crushes. If I ever had a gay thing before you came along and just didn’t notice,” Dean said.Cas suddenly looked down, and away from Dean. If Dean didn’t know better, he would swear Cas looked guilty.“What is it, Cas?”“You have had several… gay things before.” Cas still wouldn’t look at him.“What? When? How come you know this better than I do?

something on your mind? -  Sam and Dean are cursed to have personifications of their minds following them around. That's shouldn't be too bad of a problem. Just another day for the Winchesters. Except for the part where their minds speak every single thought Sam and Dean have.

the other sides of the story -  Sam and Dean go check out portals popping up in their world to make sure no more monsters cross over. They meet alternate versions of people they know and there seems to be one common thread-Dean and Cas are together.

doing life with me - He remembers the rules. The same rules set by the most beautiful drag queen in all of Alabama, spoken to him while he hid his tear-stained face, cowering on the grimy floor of a rest station bathroom: don’t talk; don’t ask for money, because most of the time, they won’t pay him anyway; don’t cry; don’t let them kiss him; and most importantly, don’t get attached. For the first time in two decades, Dean breaks the cardinal rule—and opens his mouth. “I’m too old for this.”

how many more times -  After a hunt that forces Castiel to admit his feelings for Dean, more than one truth comes out. Desperate to right the wrong he allowed to happen 26 years ago, he travels back in time and stops Azazel from murdering Mary Winchester. John never becomes a hunter, and Dean grows up a normal kid while Castiel deals with the aftermath of his decision in Heaven. When the war dies down, he comes back to Earth to fulfill a promise - a promise he made to come back for Dean one day. They fall in love all over again, but just when Castiel is finally happy, they're thrown back in time once more. How many times will Cass and Dean need to find each other before they figure out who’s screwing with them, and more importantly, how to stop them?

psalm 40:2 - “How the fuck do you know my name?” Dean hisses. The man doesn’t look scared. He is watching Dean like there is nothing else worth watching, lips a little parted, eyes a little soft. And blue. Real blue, like the ocean on a postcard. The ice spreading down Dean’s spine makes him shiver. “I suppose you could say I’m your guardian angel,” the man murmurs. His breath fogs pale between them. All of him is unnaturally warm, like Dean’s touching somebody with the sun sewn up beneath their skin. “I have known you, Dean Winchester, for a very long time.” * Dean meets an angel who says he's from the future. It all gets a lot more complicated from there.

just trying to shake off the shame - “What, you don’t think this warrants any kind of discussion?" Or: Sam is nosy, Dean is uncooperative.

tell me i’m an angel kick me like a stray -  Pain is the first emotion Castiel, angel of the lord, feels. If only it had ended at pain. Castiel documents every new emotion that nestles its way into his stolen heart. As time passes, he realises how truly fucked he is, how human he has become.

best of both worlds -  Dean is very jealous, Cas is finally getting the love he deserves, AU Dean is a badass little bitch, Sam is done with y'all's shit.

through mine, you were looking in yours -  A missing scene from "The End". In which Dean realises things, another Dean struggles, and Cas is being just a bit of an asshole

when angels fall -  On a hunting accident gone wrong, Dean accidentally shoots a creature instead of a fleeing monster. The creature in question turns out to be Castiel, an angel assigned to the Winchester's, tasked with watching over them. The bullet, engraved and imbued with magical properties, clips Castiel’s wings and leaves him grievously injured and unable to return to heaven. As such, Dean takes him in and cares for him.

the savior, our wedding, & a pizza surprise -  As Castiel Winchester slept with his head resting in Dean’s lap in the Man of Letters bunker, Dean looked lovingly at two framed photographs proudly displayed on a nearby table and wistfully remembered how Dean had begged Jack to rescue Cas from the Empty, how elated he had been to have Cas back, how their relationship quickly escalated as if they were trying to make up for years of lost time, and what a spectacularly fun adventure their wedding and honeymoon had been. A kiss from Cas brought Dean back into the present, and is followed by a pizza surprise in a way which Sam hopes to never see photographic evidence of, although it sparked Eileen’s interest in receiving helpful tips from the infamous pizza man.

what is the truth -  Dean and Sam, after knowing about Huntercop and their other self from an another universe, were willing to help them to find a place in which they can stay. But suddenly, Castiel cames and met them too, and this other Dean can't stop to flirt with him. Our Dean is not so happy about it

again, i haven’t actually read any of these, just skimmed the summaries as i copy and pasted em. my taste is pretty specific and out of step w other ppl’s, but the ones i put in my marked for later list were something on your mind, the other sides of the story, doing life with me, psalm 40:2, just trying to shake off the shame, through mine, you were looking in yours, and when angels fall. 

[help-im-a-gay-fish]

Okay, tell me more about Cream twins partners. How each couple met? How they end up together? Any fun cute facts? SPAM ME WITH INFORMATION! 🌸🌺🌸🌺🌸

Ooo! Yay! @kotikaleo this is a good ask.

Before I begin I want to make sure to clarify that both Crayon and Cindy were created by the wonderful @thebluescreen so credit for the characters go to them. (we share 3 ship kids universes)

And once again I wanna say : Disclaimer, This Celest and Luna are the children of Cross and Dream. NOT Cross and Shattered Dream. They are a alternate universe version of the Dark cream twins. They should not be confused as being the same.

I'm gonna start with Celest and her husband Crayon.

These two first met when Celest was 11 and Crayon was 12. For them it was basicly love at first sight. Celest and Luna both grew up travelling around the multiverse and that's how the met.

Crayon is a half human half monster who originally came from a dust tale time line. But more about him will come from @thebluescreen

It was an awkward, inconvenient first encounter. Luna had just broken her leg trying to do a back flip off a table (she was a dumb kid) and Celest (who had been learning first aid from a book) attempted to set it. And she made it a whole lot worse. (cross and dream weren't there at the time, they had left them alone for 10 minutes)

Crayon and his friend went over to help luna. The stress of the situation caused celest to throw up a large amount of gloop and then loose her strength in her legs and fall over. Crayon was close enough to her to catch her as she fell and gently lowered her to the ground. They locked eyes and well, they had basically been crushing on eachother since then.

It took Luna locking them in a room together and refusing to let them out till they confessed to do the trick.

They got together when Celest was 15 and Crayon was 16.

The two were very much in love. The slightly over the top, sugary sweet, child hood sweethearts. Used a bunch of cheesey names.

"I love you my sugar sweet snuggle muffin"

"not as much as I love you my cookie cream cuddle bear"

And luna is just the awkward 3rd wheel.

OK so Luna was in a relationship with this monster called Daisy from the age of 16 to 20. Daisy was a bitch, but more on that below.

It was all good till Celest turned 18, she started to get soul pain. Up until this point her sickness had been bothersome, but not to serious.

But after seeing a soul doctor, she was informed that the curruption was starting to attack her soul, and there was a possibility that it would kill her. Of course her and her family were heart broken, crayon included.

Celest went through a stage of being unhappy. The idea that she could die terrorised her. She had nightmares and got stressed to the point of alot of puking fits.

Her main conforts where her sister and boyfriend.

"I just can't help thinking of everything I'll miss out on. Marriage, children...... Travelling the multiverse...... But at least I have you right?"

So crayon responded with.

"then let's get married"

Of course Celest was shocked and was sure she'd misheard him. But then he said.

"you said that you were afraid of missing out on it, but this way we won't! I want to marry you, if you'll have me."

Celest said.

"but we are both so young, you shouldn't have to carry my burden. You have a life to live"

He said

"I want to spend it with you"

And she said yes.

Yay.

They were married just under a year later and where very happy. Cross was alittle sad to see his princess grow up so fast. But in the end they were all happy.

Crayon is truly Celest's rock. He's very sweet and good to her. To him, she is the bright light in his life, with her kindness and smarts.

They normally spend there time curled up watching movies. Or taking trips to aus like outertale to look at stars. Its all very lovey dovey.

For Luna, love was never all that easy. As I said above her first girlfriend Daisy was a bitch.

Daisy was a emotionally horrible person to Luna. Constantly telling her things like, how she needs to summon ecto or she looks like a man. Or how bones just aren't that attractive. How that fact that she was so close to her sister was creepy. In the end it was revealed that she'd been cheating on Luna while Luna had been helping her sister in the hospital. Luna finally dumbed her.

Years passed and Luna would tell people that she was ok and over it. But in truth it left huge emotional scars. She started avoiding committed relationships like the plague.

Over the years she has had a few casual girlfriends, flings and hook ups. But she told people that long term wasn't her thing, Celest knew that wasn't true, but she couldn't force her sister to date someone. It all changed when she ment Cindy.

She meets Cindy when she's 27. Basically, she met Cindy through Crayon. Since Cindy was the best friend of Crayon's sister's boyfriend.

Cinder is a underlust Sansby child and is a girl who knows what she's got and flaunts it slightly. When Luna first saw her, she went into 'oh no she's hot' mode.

Infact this was there first interaction.

Cindy "hi, I'm Cinder. It's nice to meet you"

Luna *gay panic*

Luna "wanna see me do a back flip?"

Cindy "wa-

Luna trys to back flip and falls on her face.

Cindys "you ok there?" *offers hand to help her up*

Luna *takes her hand and is helped to her feet*

Luna *more 'omg she's touching me!' gay panic *

Luna "wanna see me do a back flip?"

So yeah, Luna is very gay.

The attraction was physical to start with. Luna was smitten to the strong, confident, sexy fire girl. Que Luna repeatedly doing stupid things to try and impress her.

The best way to sum it up would be.

Pfff OK XD

Luckily for Luna though, Cindy starts to fall for the goofy cluts. Not only is Luna just a loveable idiot, but she is also quite attractive.

Cindy comes in one day while she's training and watches her spar with Cross and do a back flip successfully. She's a skilled fighter and is just as Good At Yoga as her dad is. So yeah, Luna is quite attractive to Cinder in her own right.

Cindy starts using alot of pet names for her, calling her Moony and Princess. This embarrasses Luna to no end.

So what happens? Well.

After Luna has once again fallen to the ground while trying inpress Cindy and is kind of laying there defeated. The following conversation happens.

Cindy "you need some help there Moony?"

Luna *blushes* "you know I'm gonna come up with an embarrassing nickname to call you, you know!"

Cindy "really Princess?"

Luna "yes! Uhhhhh Cinderella! Ha!"

Cindy "Cinderella? You think I've not been called that before"

Luna "dam it uh... I've got it! Toffee"

Cindy "Toffee"

Luna "yes, like Cinder toffee, and because you really like sweet foods and-

Cindy "and you could totally eat me?" *smirks*

Luna *without thinking* "yes absolutely"

Silence.

And my friend if you don't get the joke.... Its probably to mature for you. This basically causes Cinder to turn up the flirt on Luna, who is very embarrassed about saying that. To Cindy it has basically been confirmed that Luna wants her, and she's into that.

Luna freaks out *thank you gay panic* and yells "I'M STRAIGHT!" and runs away.

Luna then spends the next two days being consoled by her sister. Meanwhile Cindy asks around to find out if Luna is really straight. It is very quickly confirmed to her that Luna is very much gay and very much into her.

She conforts Luna about this and after Luna attmits that she is gay and is about to confess her crush, Cindy pins her to the wall and kisses her.

Long story short Luna gets to eat her and they go to bed together. And after that they become 'causal' girlfriends. It doesn't take to long for there feelings for eachother to evolve from a physical attraction into real love. But they would never confront their feelings.

Texting eachother till the early hours of the morning? just causal.

Inviting Cindy to family Christmas? just causal.

Laying in eachothers arms in bed, not wanting to get up. Just causal.

Who knows if they will ever confront how they really feel? Maybe some unfortunate life events will force them to.

Fun facts about the couples.

Cindy has a whole bunch of pet names for Luna, after they start dating she most commonly calls her Starlight. But has a whole list more

Crayon loves to buy his wife flowers. He's quite a soft man and I like to think he takes great care in picking out a bunch of flowers. He'll most commonly buy her roses. He also likes to prepare picnics so that they can go out to aus together.

Cindy has a huge sweet tooth. Luna has often tried to bake for her. Lu Lu isn't a very skilled Baker though. But if she presents Cindy with a plate of slightly burnt cupcakes splattered with icing, it will make Cinder's heart melt.

Crayon often has to help Celest get dressed in the mornings. Since the marks commonly appear on her arms and legs. Crayon has taken a very long time to practice how to help her dress without causing pain.

Some mornings, especially after they've had a busy night, Cinder will often steal Luna's shirt. She will wear it around the house. "but babe... That's my shirt"........... "I've got no idea what you're talking about Moony".

Celestial star would be the type to call her husband at work out of nowhere just to remind him that she loves him.

The first time they kissed, Celest got so nervous and excited that she threw up gloop all over him.

Cindy loves to roller skate and would attempt to teach Luna how to. After a long time of Luna falling over into many comprising positions, Cinder simply wraps her arms around her waist and they skate together.

Crayon is a half human-half monster, so he can practice some magic. One thing he likes to do is make little figures of butterflys fly around his wife's hospital room when she has to stay at the hospital. It always makes her day.

[terramythos]

TerraMythos' 2020 Reading Challenge - Book 11 of 26

Title: The Last Sun (The Tarot Sequence #1) (2018)

Author: K. D. Edwards

Genre/Tags: Urban Fantasy, Alternate History (I guess), Mystery, Action, First-Person, LGBT Protagonist

Rating: 9/10

Date Began: 4/06/2020

Date Finished: 4/10/2020

When the city of Atlantis was destroyed, the survivors fled to Nantucket and built a new home-- a conglomeration of buildings stolen from around the world. Led by courts styled after the major Arcana in tarot, New Atlantis is now a modern, magical metropolis filled with danger and political intrigue. 

The Last Sun follows Rune, the sole survivor and social pariah of the former Sun Court, wiped out by persons unknown two decades ago. He and his mind-linked bodyguard Brand are hired by Lord Tower to look into the strange disappearance of Addam, a scion of Justice. However, their investigations soon uncover a conspiracy that links to Rune’s past, and the total decimation of his family. 

“Stop making fun of my weight,” I said. “And while you’re at it, pay better attention. Matthias is following us.” 

Brand gave me a perfectly blank look. I loved catching details before he did. I said, “He’s got on that purple t-shirt that Queenie gave him. He’s two streets back. By the pretzel vendor.” 

“Are you being smug? Is that a smug look?” 

“Of course not,” I said. 

“Do you feel smug because you just spotted Matthias by the pretzel vendor?” 

“Not at all.” 

“Because he’s been following us since we were half a block away from Half House. He went out the second-story bathroom window and down the drainpipe. He’s let us keep a two-block lead except when he ran into Starbucks to get an iced coffee. You noticed none of this.” 

This is the kind of book I’d normally give a solid 8/10. It was entertaining to read, a promising start to a series, and not a whole lot beyond that. On the other hand, I just genuinely enjoyed the hell out of The Last Sun. I liked the characters, was intrigued by the worldbuilding, and loved the humor sprinkled throughout. Also, it’s gay. If that’s not enough to boost it to a 9, what is even the point of a rating system?

Part of it is the tropes, for sure. The tarot motif? Soul-binding (in multiple flavors)? Magic tied to the characters’ emotional state? Characters who suffer(ed) unimaginable trauma yet strive to be the best person they can be? Tons of genuinely funny character banter? REVENGE? Overtly gay protagonist? Be still my beating heart. It’s like Edwards did a paint by numbers of the type of stuff I enjoy in fiction and this was the result.

I think New Atlantis is a very interesting setting, and am eager to see how it develops. Edwards drops a lot of hints about places and characters that are intriguing and never fully explored. I’m torn here, because I really wanted more worldbuilding, but I also understand the appeal of revealing information gradually over time. As it stands, The Last Sun ends with lots of intentionally unanswered questions. Will The Hanged Man (#2) answer some of them? I guess we’ll see, but I expect so.

Now for some tinfoil hat stuff... I could be wrong, but I have a sneaking suspicion this book is a heavily adapted version of the author’s DnD campaign. The first thing that clued me in is the magic system. Magic-users like Rune have these rare and valuable items called sigils, which they can use once and then have to recharge later. So.. spell slots? Also, cantrips are literally a thing and have the same name. The action and fight sequences (plus the kind of enemies they encounter) are very reminiscent of standard fantasy tabletop stuff. I haven’t seen anyone else mention this, so it’s possible I’m just being paranoid. It’s not a criticism, just something I noticed.

My biggest criticism of the novel (and the main thing keeping it from a 10) is that the action feels repetitive after a point. The general structure of the story is (1) plot plot plot (2) Rune (and whoever is with him) is attacked by monster(s), which they fight and (3) repeat the first two steps. I found myself really wanting more variety in these sequences. The plot sections are solid, but for me the action sections start to blend together outside of a few key exceptions. I hope this is better in the next book, because it would definitely improve the pacing.

The second thing is more an observation than a complaint. Edwards introduces a lot of characters in this book, and not all of them are particularly important. I suspect that this is because these characters will have larger roles in future books, and he wanted to introduce them early in the story. The October Daye series by Seanan McGuire does this same thing -- Rosemary and Rue (#1) introduces (practically) all of the major heroes and villains for the now 13-book series, and many of them aren’t particularly noteworthy early on. I suspect that will be the case here as well, but I don’t know yet.

As much as I recommend The Last Sun, I do want to give a fair warning -- there is some pretty graphic and potentially triggering content in this book. I don’t want to go into detail for this review, but if you are interested in reading it and want to know what I’m talking about beforehand, you can reach out to me privately and I’ll do my best to answer your questions.

That being said, I’m very impressed with this debut novel. I’m excited to read The Hanged Man (#2) next and spend some more time with these characters!

[bestwishes86]

Open Container

"I got a good feeling. It doesn't happen. Very Often." Phoebe Bridgers

When David got the call he was just sitting down in his living room with "Game of Thrones" on his 42 inch flat screen.  The fresh bowl of Pop Secret and a Heineken sat on the polished coffee table. Hadley was at the Tailgating party for the Puritans and he was on call with the station.  He had spent the morning cleaning the upscale brownstone once back from Seattle to clear his head. The drive with that gay asshole had fucked with him more than he wanted to think about.  So he had busied himself, not thinking about him walking out of the missing woman's shower naked.  He could still see the words in other languages and black swirls running across that pale skin.  As he had polished every surface he could still see the tattoos had covered even the plump flaccid cock between those thick legs.

His bookshelves were filled with paperback novels from the eighties and nineties and every Disney movie with the large white boxes and the faded art and a selection of dvds.  The books and movies had belonged to his parents and he couldn't bring himself to throw any of it away.  His wife Penelo had done the decorating and so three oil paintings of landscapes in polished wood frames hung on the walls on either side of the flat screen. 

David sat on the soft dark leather couch and was pulling his remote to him when his phone rang.  Internally he thought about ignoring it incase it was another call about cow tipping or another horrible trip to Seattle to pick up another gay asshole who smelled like honeysuckle and blood.  Seeing the name LInds on the caller id he grabbed it and swiped right to answer it.

"Deputy, do you know a Jon Redding?" the deep voice of the Siren by night hard as nails, raven haired woman asked. 

"Yes...why?" David asked slowly, staring at the burning emblem of the show and the paused status bar at the bottom of the screen.

"You should probably cut him off, he's down here talking about loving someone who didn't exist and getting thrown into posters and that's not what the boring patrons want to hear, now is it?" Linds asked as she looked at the usually handsome bearded man who looked ready to pass out or throw up sitting alone at a table.  The other customers were human ones and she had sung two of her magical songs to distract them from him.  David felt a headache building behind his furrowed brows but he still rose from the couch and hung up the call and grabbed his keys. 

Jon stared at his empty glass, his mind muddled by the many drinks that had come before as he thought about that alternate version of himself.  While he was a short, muscular young man covered in witches spells.  That dreamed up version was a chubby, pasty coward.  He missed feeling that weak and vulnerable and the way Pete had looked at him.  Jon shook his head at the memory of the tall, pale muscular teenager with those green eyes and that square jaw.  But it was too late, he remembered the dream Pete had been in and been gutted in.  Tears burned at the corners of his eyes

"It wasn't real, none of it." Jon shouted to himself and all the bar patrons glared at him as they had every outburst he had made in the last hour.  He knew it was stupid, knew it was a waste of emotion but those feeiings he had felt in that mental prison had become a part of him.  He had been quiet the entire drive back with that asshole homophobe because he was etching into his memory those three dreams because of Pete.  The witch he had planned on eating had trapped him inside her mental prisons had made the imagined world so real he had created real feelings. 

"This seat taken," a gruff pissed off voice asked and Jon waved a hand in acceptance and grimaced at the loud scrapping of the wood against the concrete floor. David plopped down and held a hand up for the waitress.  HIs brown eyes looking over Jon, the man had worn a dark blue sweater and jeans with loafers.  David thought about his old Smashing Pumpkins t shirt and pajama bottoms and barefeet. He chuckled at this but when the red in the face spikey haired man looked at him, his smile fell away.

"You...." Jon said growling in distrust

"Hey man, Heard you were drinking here so I came by too," David was cut off by Jon

"You came here dressed like that to drink with me, no offense but unless you're going to knock me out and take me back to your house for a hard fucking, i'm gonna pass." Jon said looking David up and down and reaching for his glass having forgotten it was empty.  He grimaced at the mere hints of alcohol in it and waved for the waitress while David glared at him. 

"Do you have to go straight to sex every time i meet you." David said between gritted teeth.

"We've met twice. Second, what else am I good for? Never mind that last point. You don't even know me is what I'm trying to say." Jon slurred in a voice that was something between indignant and a purr.  David rolled his eyes at him and Jon slumped back in his chair.

"Why would I want to? I'm just here to make sure you don't talk about shit you promised you wouldn't." David paused as the waitress appeared he ordered two Rum Punches and a Budwiser. 

"I didn't say you could buy a drink for me," Jon said as he closed his eyes

"I didn't, those are all for me." David said as he glared at LInds who waved apologetically. 

"Ok. Did the bartender alert you to me talking too much," Jon asked and Davd nodded.

"I just...never mind it's stupid once you're drunk we can leave," Jon said as the two red glasses and the bottle arrived.

"You want anything," David asked, his expression softened as he smelled the sadness coming off Jon and heard the pain in his voice. Jon reached for one of the rum punches and David smacked his hand.

"Mine," David said drawing the glass away from the drunkard, he continued, "I meant something else. I got you for it, I already covered your bill," David said and Jon thought about it for a moment and asked for a Bud Light.  David raised an eyebrow  but placed the order the two sat in heavy silence.  David occasionally glanced at the drunk man stare at the table and the empty glass, it was clear his mind was somewhere else. David finished his first drink and curled his toes on the cold floor.  Jon's beer arrived and David watched Jon drink half of it one go.  He watched the Adam's apple bob with each swallow before he looked away. 

"Have you ever missed someone you shouldn't," Jon asked and David sat up uncomfortable as he looked at Jon.  The image of the beautifully deformed half woman half wolf chained to walls in an institution flashed in David's mind.

"Yeah, hurts all the same." David said solemnly thinking of his wife.  His Alpha had told him to kill her, to end her suffering but he couldn't.  So he had driven her to that asylum and chained her up himself.  Her human mind was gone, buried inside the feral wolf mind that ruled that malformation.

"It really really fucking does.  In that place that woman held me, there was a boy my mind made up.  He was...kind to me.  The first person in my life to be kind to me ended up being my own imagination...how fucked is that." Jon said and as he admitted it two large tears began their descent down his cheeks.  They were soon chased by more and he quietly wept.  He didn't care if David said something else assholey to him.  If the bar patrons kicked him out, none of it mattered as he watched the large stainless steel meat hook burst out of Pete's broad chest.  His mind had drifted back to that nightmarish prison he had been kept in.  He and Pete had run from the blank faced woman up the stairs of his home to his bedroom and locked the door behind them.  It had happened so suddenly as they had caught their breath.  She had burst through the wood, her scream almost deafening as Pete had run at her with his chair as a weapon.  She had smacked him away so effortlessly and then glowered at him.

Jon had stood there frozen in horror as the woman took slow strides toward him, she had reached into that dusty overcoat and pulled the metal hook from it and it caught the light of the room and glistened.  He had wanted to brave, wanted to try something to save them but he had been so afraid.  Pete had run in front of Jon to save him from it in that made up nightmare.  Jon could feel the moment when life left Pete's body.  It was if something was pulled from his body, ripped away with that second in life.  It didn't matter if it was real or not, it had felt real to him. 

Strong hands were on his shoulders, he felt his body rising up as he was swung up into someone's arms but he didn't care.  He kept his eyes closed as he was carried out of the bar.  The cool night air felt heavenly on his face.  He buried his head against the hard flat chest he was pressed against.  Jon focused on the heart beating strong beneath the shirt and skin and muscle there.  It was real, in that drunken moment it was the only thing real to him.

David had felt his wolf howl in pain watching the quiet crying, he had tried to ignore it.  But that open honest act of feeling had struck him in the gut.  He had looked around and saw that the once loud raucous bar was silent as everyone watched Jon.  That had been what caused him to rise from his seat and carry him out.  Carrying the muscular man might have been hard for a normal man but for one with preternatural strength it was like carrying a newborn pup.  He ignores the gravel that dug into the skin of his bare feet as he listens to the steady heart beat.  Keeping Jon close to him kept his wolf from howling in mourning so he did.  Linds was behind him a few steps, she silently watched him, he could feel her eyes on his back as he made his way through the packed parking lot to his truck.   The tall, slender, dark haired woman wore a red velvet corset that pushed up her sizable chest and painted on black jeans and boots.  Her race's language was tattooed across her arms in dark blue swaths of color.  She opened the door for him and he placed Jon inside. 

It wasn't til he buckled the seatbelt that she spoke.  There were only a few reasons Sirens were ever silent and he knew it wouldn't be good but he listened, his focus on making sure Jon was secure.

"I've seen your future, the same as I saw it when your daddy broke your right arm.  The man I saw you kissing in your future, he's that man there. He is exactly as I described it to you 15 years ago. You came here the instant you heard it was him.  That means something Davey," Linds said and David whirled around to face her.  His brown eyes burning gold with the power of his wolf burning right beneath his skin.

"Jesus H. Christ Linds!!! I don't fucking need this shit. This man is the top suspect in a woman's disappearance. My wife is in a fucking padded cell. Everytime I see her she rips my throat out and I watch her eat it. And you're here reminding me that 15 years ago my dad took a hammer and shattered my elbow. Spit on me and called me a faggot, all for this sad sack of shit who was in your bar mooning over a made up teenage crush that I am jealous of." LInds eyebrows shot up the same as his as he realized what he said.  He couldn't take it back.  Linds watched the lean werewolf vibrate with shock and anger.  She knew she should be afraid but all she wanted to do was the same thing she had done when they had been teenagers. She reached out for him but he took a step back, not trusting the low growling wolf inside his soul. 

He had sat in that bar watching those tears and selfishly wished they had been for him, not some made up boy.  He felt immature and selfish and wanted to be alone but instead he fished his keys out of his pocket and stormed around to the driver's side of the truck and got in and without a word drove off as Linds watched him go. 

[dominicvail]

in another world, ncis:la feeds us with actual Au episodes every now and again, but our world is imperfect and we just have to imagine this stuff here, but like, if this did happen i would Require these au’s;

A Bowling Au. Everything is played with exactly the same tone as the actual show, so it’s usually laughable but Sometimes super dramatic except instead of like, a terrorist attack, a rival team bowled a strike. Sam used to be on a super militant and well respected team and hasn’t gotten over that half the time people don’t know the name of this new one. He believes bowling balls should be polished before repacking, Every time, that Deeks just shoves his in the same reusable plastic bag he’s had for 8 years Pains him. G’s back story is Identical to the show except this isn’t a spy genre anymore so ppl just think he’s like, the super above it all edge lord because of it all. 

Teacher AU. Sam teaches all kinds of advanced math, G is a gym teacher who acts really stupid all the time to stop people giving him responsibilities he doesn’t want. Despite this, he is often dragged in to cover for language classes because somebody figured out he’s a language like, genius or something. He covered a drama class one time, too, and was scarily good at it. Deeks actually Is the drama teacher, the kids all Love him. Kensi teaches all kinds of physical design classes, like, anything to do with engines, she does woodwork, things like that, she’s not As liked among the student body (i mean, the boys and gays love her, but her jokes are Weird) but she isn’t classed as one of the asshole teachers. Eric teaches IT or whatever u call computing, he’s friendly, won’t put up with crap, but like, next to nobody understands him because he’s not good at dumbing things down. Nell doesn’t teach at first, was just an administrator dealing with all the complicated things, but sometimes substitutes, she’s tiny and Scary and is not a substitute u can walk all over, the ones who tried can’t figure out How she got them to behave??? but it happened. Mr Deeks and Ms Blye are the ‘will they or won’t they’ teacher couple of the school only for deeks to accidentally let slip that his wife is better at long distance running than he is and they all work it out that they’ve been married the whole time. Mr Beale and Miss Jones become the next will they won’t they couple except it embarrasses them so much all they do is blush at each other now. Hetty is the principal/head teacher. She is rarely seen, to be feared, but always watching. 

Star Trek AU; Hetty is the captain of the ship they’re on, but the show is more about the main away team. Is the team’s reputation as bad as section 31 (the shady(tm) part of starfleet), No! Is their reputation necessarily good? No. In fact, they frequently butt heads with section 31 (we’re calling them the equivalent of the cia in the show, they can be friends but... yeah), however their results are rarely questionable and they save many, many lives. It is highly unlikely anyone will ever be promoted. Sam is a Vulcan, calm waters... except if you make him snap, Vulcans have deep running emotions. Deeks is just. The Most Obnoxious Human to him Ever. G is half betazed, it’s why he’s so good at reading people.  Eric is a member of a species that is super social but have few social graces similar to humans so is always super awkward. Kensi has a tragic backstory where she thinks the borg got her dad when she was a kid but it was a Cover Up. I would make Nell non human also, but i will be honest, i am running out of trek aliens i can make her (klingon nell is a Hilarious concept tho). Hetty is Bajoran. 

James Bond AU. Everything is the same except they all use bad english accents the whole way through the episode. 

I am a massive fan of alternate takes on soulmate au’s, i don’t like romantic soulmate au’s, but unusual takes on them are my Jam. In this one, people have soul marks from people who will have the most profound effects on them in their lives on their bodies. This doesn’t necessarily mean the effects will be good, just profound and altering. The team realise they all have marks from each other on their bodies, and are elated to find out all those marks are Positive effects. 

Though i will admit the ‘see in colour when you meet your soulmate’ one would be hilarious with legitimately Any of the partners on the show. Kensi: See’s deeks, learns what blue is. Kensi: spirals into deep denial and yells at him a lot. 

Queer Eye AU where the Fab 5 are called in when Hetty nominates her team for a makeover! Bobby redecorates the boat shed, is asked by hetty to keep what is already bulletproof, bulletproof. And to keep the trap door. And not to worry about any bloodstains and how they got there. Tan’s discovers how hard it is to style around Sam’s muscles. Tries very hard to stop Nell from mixing prints. Experiences horror at Eric’s wardrobe, Nell is shown in BG laughing. Every single man exhibits true, actual horror at the idea of JVN changing their hair and pack into Sam’s car and run away to hide in the woods. Nell and Kensi enjoy the salon appointment in their absence. Karamo manages to negotiate getting paid literally twice his previous rate by just having to try to fix these idiots’ lives and deserves every penny. Antoni trying to teach them to make fun and not disgusting food doesn’t end well. Deeks can cook but likes to Experiment and 97% of his food is awful. Sam can cook, but it’s all bland muscle building/health food. The rest of them are incompetent, set the kitchen on fire, are caught ordering chinese on the sly, ruin 5 pots and pans with burn marks. They open the new boatshed design by interrogating a criminal they just picked up on a case, he points out how fabulous the decor is as he’s led to the interrogation room. Everybody cheers. The team provided snacks in said interrogation Could be considered a torture technique, tho. 

The team go on jeopardy. I have never seen this game show and have no idea how it works, but i bet it would be funny so it is a bullet point. 

Buffy the vampire slayer au, Kensi is a vampire slayer who Happens to just be an ncis agent. She does her normal job but also tries to keep the vampire world a secret from her team mates. Callen: uh, kensi... why do you spend so much of your free time hanging around cemeteries? Kensi: uh... Bat watching???

Superhero AU but they all have really dumb powers. Sam can raise the temperature of any body of water from a lake to a puddle by ten degrees in temperature whenever he wants. G can spontaneously grow and un-grow his hair, if he gets drunk and makes it super long he has ringlets. Deeks can hover exactly one foot in the air, no higher, is designated ‘grab that off the high shelf’ guy. Kensi can sense sugar. This helps in no ways but essentially makes her a human version of one of the medical alert dogs for diabetics. Eric can make anybody around him mildly sleepy if he wants to. He never wants this. It doesn’t even send them to sleep, they just yawn more often and that makes Him yawn more. Nell can speak to cows, since she lives in the middle of Los Angeles, this is not helpful. Plus, cows mostly just talk about grass and are really very boring. Granger could create rainbows out of thin air which was obviously in perfect sync with his personality. Hetty can detach her toes at will. This is only useful in the case of uncomfortable shoes, but can be awkward if somebody routinely searches your bag and finds them in there and arrests you for being a creepy toe cutting off serial killer. 

i would watch it, s’all i’m saying.

[gascon-en-exil]

FE16 Black Eagles (Edelgard) Liveblogging

Chapters 17-18, minus the colossal amount of Dimitri/Dedue content in the first chapter which I covered at length here.

Altogether I’d consider Edelgard’s last two chapters to be easier than Dimitri’s, in large part to due to far less long range magic. That’s actually quite reasonable in terms of story; as the nation renowned for its magic users - and, by the last chapter of the Lions route, openly allied with the remnants of Those Who Slither - Adrestia would logically field more of them. The knights of Faerghus and the church and Rhea’s “dolls” (more like fantasy-flavored mechs, but that’s what they call them) don’t offer as big a challenge by comparison.

The other obstacles unique to Chapter 18 weren’t much either. The fire makes the map hard to traverse for non-fliers, but it slows down enemies too. Rhea as the Immaculate One has a much smaller attack range than Hegemon Edelgard and only gets one attack per turn, in addition to being a bigger target that’s easier to surround. It makes sense that the climax of this route wouldn’t be as difficult if they used the number of chapters for scaling. The Strike Force has had four fewer chapters to grow compared to the Lions.

I liked that the last chapter plays out on a heavily modified version of the Fhirdiad map used in the Lions route for the Cornelia fight, although this does mean that I only got to see two entirely new maps on this route: the Petra/Bernadetta paralogue and the Tailtean Plains of Chapter 17.

Kill list: other than Dimitri and Dedue’s gay high tragedy, Sylvain and Mercedes in 17, Ashe, Gilbert, Annette, Catherine, and Cyril in 18. Catherine was much easier to take down from range with the fires limiting her movement, whereas Cyril (I thought he died in Chapter 12? I guess not) was surprisingly strong as a wyvern lord packing a brave axe. Wyvern enemies continue to catch me off guard.

Oh, yeah. Rhea shows up on the field in a Seiros cosplay in Chapter 17, but Edelgard one-rounded her (at a weapon triangle disadvantage, no less) and then she and almost all of the reinforcements she spawned with left the map. With everything else going on in that map, the church contribution was quite underwhelming.

Story/Character observations

Let’s get the small stuff out of the way first. There’s a few last bits of monastery dialogue worth noting. Shamir gets in some more heavy subtext re: Catherine, only now they’re enemies and you could potentially have Shamir kill Catherine. Dedue is a bear. Fleche, the girl who tries to kill Dimitri on the Lions route but instead kills Rodrigue, shows up one last time to show how curiously well-adjusted she is on this route after her brother’s death a few chapters earlier. It was interesting to see those two and the NPC general Ladislava show up during exploration and comment on ongoing events. I wouldn’t say it humanizes them too much since the most you get is an NPC fawning over how awesome Ladislava is or more pathos and less torture in Randolph’s death, but it’s appropriate for the alternative perspective this route offers. 

I also need to call attention to a handy scholar NPC who appears in the library every chapter after the timeskip, dispensing info dumps that the books don’t cover and asking us to call into question the authorial intent of those books. Of course he’s obviously biased in favor of Edelgard and the Empire, but it’s a useful addition.

Onto supports. As a means of ensuring that I got the Hubert/Ferdinand paired ending I saved all their other A supports for the last minute, so that’s most of what I saw here. As per usual it’s Ferdinand who gets the more interesting stuff overall, with Hubert being more sedate and needing to be given practical reasons for marrying Dorothea or motivation to stop comparing Petra to Edelgard. Ferdinand’s high points come down even to something as mundane as what he’s drinking in various A supports - tea with Bernadetta, coffee (Hubert’s preferred drink) with Edelgard. Does Hubert/Ferdinand canonically happen before Edelgard/Ferdinand, and this is why the former’s paired ending has Edelgard jealous of them? Ferdinand’s A with Manuela is more theatre queen gushing, but his A with Dorothea walks a fine line between really sweet and really screwed up. Dorothea recalls bathing in a public fountain shortly after her singing talents were discovered and seeing a young Ferdinand staring at her and probably sporting his first erection. This is why she’s so hostile to him the whole time, and as said I don’t know how we’re meant to feel about that, or that this conversation resolves in romance. Or, rather, it would, if they didn’t then jump back to a confused simile about bees that’s now morphed into drones protecting a queen. From what little I know of insects male bees don’t have stingers and so can’t protect anything, so I do believe this metaphor subtly circles back around to lesbianism in the end. Everything with Dorothea inevitably does.

I’ve been neglecting it all this time, but I will say that Bernadetta improves slightly after the timeskip. She screams a lot less in her later supports, and in her dialogue in general she sounds more composed and less prone to immediately hiding herself away. Yay for actual emotional maturation.

I’m going to delicately sidestep the hotly-debated question of whether Edelgard’s goals justify her actions or whether this is in fact a bonafide villain route. The game itself wavers over this question at multiple points, not as shakily as Conquest does but still in ways that feel tonally off. The attempts at humanizing Edelgard by giving her a mundane fear of rats (that she acquired when she was being tortured as a child - totally normal circumstances!) and having her draw sketches of Byleth don’t land because they’re so disconnected from everything else, and her opinion of the religion of Seiros varies constantly. Sometimes she sees the value of spirituality in people’s lives and only takes issue with the corruption of the church, other times - including at the very end, when she’s about to cave Rhea’s head in - she’s declaring that humanity has no need for gods and will be better off without them. Having played her route it’s hard for me to call her a fantasy Protestant even in jest when she’s more of a dystheist (i.e. gods exist, but they are evil antagonistic forces) who will occasionally acknowledge that religion can have a positive impact on a strictly personal level. Even though she lays her plans out for Byleth early on, well before the timeskip, her ultimate aim remains unclear, not helped by the brevity of the epilogue which seems to be standard across all routes - just a short paragraph of text by the narrator over one of those stylized tapestries, cut to turn counts and character endings. Edelgard abolishes the nobility and the church after having conquered the other two nations by military force, and somehow we’re expected to believe that her regime will remain peaceful and stable and not collapse into anarchy in the space of a few years. Sure.

It does not help in the slightest that this route builds up Those Who Slither as a credible threat, only to shove them off onto an unseen postgame conflict. True, I theorized that allowing Claude and his various allies to live on the Lions route sets the stage for a massive Almyran invasion after the credits roll, but that’s more headcanon based on how FE doesn’t like to settle for unambiguously happy and resolved endings. Those Who Slither are the genuine antagonists of this route, and most of what Rhea has actually done is left unexplained. From a Doylist perspective I understand it, I really do: Those Who Slither take the focus for the Deer, and Rhea takes it for the church route, just as Dimitri’s revenge motivation only gets proper attention on the Lions route. However, these four stories are not all occurring simultaneously but are instead essentially AUs of one another, with Byleth choosing their starter Pokémon their house the catalyst for shaping all the events to follow. Looking at this route in isolation though it leaves Edelgard’s grand mission looking highly questionable.

One last thing, because I almost forgot about him: what happened to the Death Knight? He disappears from the game after the timeskip on this route. I assume you see him again if you recruit Mercedes and get her paralogue with Caspar, but it’s strange that one of Edelgard’s most loyal minions from Part 1 doesn’t even warrant a mention during her conquest of Fódlan.

Two routes down and two more to go - time to fear the Deer...’s lack of homoerotic content. Nothing makes me want to play something like knowing all the characters under my control are sexually uncreative prudes.

EDIT: Right, I remembered the DK but not the m!Byleth/Linhardt S rank. That should say something about how not particularly romantic it is. Really, the S rank with Gilbert and the one paired S rank with Alois where Byleth doesn’t marry someone else seem less offensive in light of how little there is to m!Byleth’s one “real” gay pairing. As always, you can get so much more out of conversations when both characters are allowed to speak and emote outside of irrelevant dialogue choices and stiff model gestures.

[tippitv]

Supernatural Recap: 14.03 “The Scar”

THEN!

Jack is really having a hard time since Lucifer stole his grace, essentially rendering him a very handsome but otherwise normal young human. Michael (in Dean) has been going around burning the eyes out of people as some kind of "experiment." Then somehow Dean ends up getting rid of Michael and the cap he was wearing. What??? I'm now realizing I've somehow skipped that episode. Oh well! Pressing on in ignorance!

NOW!

Dean returns to the bunker, riddled with anxiety. "Every time I think about it, it's like a nightmare," he says as Sam trails him. "I can't eat, I can't sleep... it's always just there watching!"

Is he talking about his recent ordeal of being possessed by an archangel? The very one he fought so hard against many a season ago? Of course not! He's talking about Sam's fluffy new beard! And he's still wearing his Michael clothes, so at most it's been a couple of hours and it makes no sense even by Wisecracking Dean standards to talk like it's been days.

Sam is worried. "You didn't talk a lot on the whole ride here," he says. He was coming up with complaints about your beard. Dean tries to play it off, saying he doesn't remember anything from his time possessed by Michael. "I'm just really happy to be home, he says," then sees the Bunker Bunch.

For some reason he's really puzzled by their presence. Or maybe he's surprised by how they seem to have settled in. Also, why didn't they go in through the front door? They must have come in through some back door. The rarely-seen garage entrance? I need to stop asking all these questions or I'll never finish. I'm only one-and-a-half minutes into this.

Only this ONE GUY notices that the person they've been looking for for WEEKS is now suddenly in their midst. Give him an award!

"Not Michael anymore," Dean says when he sees the guy looking wary. "Yeah, Chief told us," the guy says. THEN WHY WERE YOU TAKEN ABACK? No award for you.

Jack walks into the room and notices him right away. Give him that guy's trophy! His little face lights up. Then Castiel walks into the room and sees him and the orchestral strings swell with emotion. They say each other's names while staring holes into my TV screen.

Like... look. I'm actually pretty Destiel-neutral. I don't care a lot one way or the other if they get together, but I'm not immune to noticing when people try to burn each other's underpants off using nothing but their eyes.

Then Jack changes the subject before anyone can start fucking right there on the nearest table. "Where's Mary?" he asks. Sam awkwardly explains she and Bobby stayed back in Duluth to clean up what Michael did. Dean excuses himself to go take a shower.

Jack reveals that Nick is gone. Castiel explains further, but whatever. I'm just glad he's gone. Sam is understandably a little freaked out, but Cas is more concerned about whatever's going on with Dean. "Why would Michael just give up his vessel like that?" he wonders. Sam shakes his head.

Dean, alone in his bedroom, starts to undress, revealing a big new scar on his upper arm. It looks like a hipster mustache.

Cue the title card that will always remind me of the Target sign!

Dean brings his upper arm to the Winchester inner circle. Everyone wonders what could have hurt Michael like that. He wants Cas to probe the hot, moist depths of his memory to find out why he has a hipster mustache on his arm.

Flashes of images reveal some cloaked figure stabbing Michael-in-Dean with a spear tipped with a giant crab fork. Ah yes, it's Bad Kaia from the Unseen Dinosaur Universe who killed Original Flavor Kaia. I mean, we know her because we saw her face in the Wayward ep, but the Winchesters don't.

Meanwhile in South Dakota, Jody Mills gets a text from Claire updating her with what's been going on.

A moment later, she gets a call from the Winchesters to let her know Dean is back. Also to tell her that whoever killed Kaia came through the episiotomy in spacetime and might be in her neighborhood.

They describe Dean's mustache scar to her and it turns out she's been finding headless corpses with the same marks. She didn't think that was weird enough to call anyone back at the bunker? I mean, even if she thought they were human, it seems like a weird possibly culty thing. Jack wants to go with them to see Jody, but Dean puts the kibosh on that. Jack turns away, dejected and alone.

Suddenly, a subplot enters the bunker.

Someone named Jules brings in a teenage girl who's the victim of some kind of witchcraft. "Looks like an aging spell," Cas remarks because she has one wrinkled hand. Oh and there were apparently other victims but they didn't survive. He tries to heal her, but fails. "This might take a while," he says.

Dean wants to just scowl and drive fast, but Sam wants to talk. "We still have no idea why Michael let you go," he says. Maybe he's just seen the show's IMDB page and knows things have to sort of be back to "normal" so that the season can have its Fun Time 5th (sometimes 4th) episode!

They do the usual thing of Dean not wanting to talk about his feelings and Sam wanting him to talk about his feelings. A jangly guitar in the soundtrack plucks out a few mournful notes of Stoic Masculinity while we watch the muscles in Dean's jawline.

The Winchesters meet up with Jody in the middle of the woods. She catches them up with what's going on with the Wayward cast off-screen and pets Sam's beard like it's a playful kitten.

Jack packs up a bag, ready to leave the bunker behind, and places a note upon his bed. He's only a year old, so I'm kind of impressed he can write so legibly.

On his way out, he hears people in the infirmary and goes to check. It's Castiel and Jules with the winkly-handed teenager. "She's been enchanted," Cas explains. "Like Sleeping Beauty," Jack says, somewhat awed. But the witch's magic can't be healed because of Reasons, so Cas is looking up a spell Rowena recommended. Is she still off with Charlie on a road trip in the Southwest?

Cas notices Jack's backpack. "Are you going somewhere?" he asks. "Um... no," Jack replies. Cas makes a memeable face.

The Winchesters and Jody explore the lush coastal rain forest of South Dakota. It takes them all of five seconds to find one of those heads from the headless bodies. For some reason, it looks eerily like Mark Hamill circa Empire Strikes Back.

Oh there are three heads, arranged on pikes around the smoldering remnants of a campfire. Dean pokes around and finds vampire fangs on all of them, but Jody had Alex test the bodies and they didn't react to any of the normal vampire triggers.

While Dean examines the campfire, Alternate Kaia attacks him and the others with her crab fork spear. For some reason, she doesn't kill them but her hood falls back and they see her face for the first time.

Alternate Kaia makes an escape while everyone is too busy wondering how there can be another Kaia, even though duplicate characters are pretty common by now. They're all pretty sure she killed the OG version, though.

Back the bunker, Wrinkly Teen still has just the one hand that seems to be affected. She wakes up when Jack touches her hand. She looks over at Cas. "Is that your dad?" she asks. "One of them," Jack says. Do you think she assumes there's a two dads married to each other situation, or that there's a bio dad and adopted dad situation? The girl reveals her purpose as the subplot.

Parallellogirl says a witch took in her and two other girls, and even gave her a fancy pendant. Oh her wrinkles are spreading up her chest now. I feel like someone would have taken a look at that necklace and realized right away it's involved. She says the other girls withered and died the same as she's doing now.

In Sioux Falls, Sam somehow realizes that Michael sent the vampires after Alternate Kaia.  Oh I see... the same thing happened with werewolves in the previous episode and I missed it. Michael is making monsters with special immunities to their usual weaknesses. Werewolves are impervious to silver, vampires aren't affected by dead man's blood. Who knows what other monsters Michael has enhanced?

Back at the bunker, Cas and Jules try the reversing spell, but all they get is a burst of cool purple smoke. The subplot girl's wrinkles spread. She chokes for air. "Help," she gasps. Jack watches in horror and thinks about how useless he is.

Dean tromps ahead through the forest while Jody and Sam bring up the rear. Sam notices that Jody seems to be avoiding Claire's calls. She doesn't want to upset her with news of Kaia's killer. Off Sam's puzzled look, Jody explains, "First love strikes quick... and to lose it like that?" So, Kaia was a woman of color AND possibly a wlw. And imo, no, having an alternate version of her doesn't undo the Bury Your Gays trope although I do appreciate Berens at least trying to make things canon in this episode.

Dean catches up to Alternate Kaia outside a rustic cabin that looks like every rustic cabin, and punches her in the face to knock her out. His face makes this kind of scary, numb expression

When Alternate Kaia wakes up, they've got her tied up in the cabin. They talk about OG Kaia. "What I was to her, and what she was to me, you could never understand," Alternate Kaia says. She was trying to kill Claire when she killed Kaia instead. She says Michael has been sending monsters after her ever since she got here. Cut to three new monsters sniffing around her old campsite. Except for their teeth, they just look like they're trying to find the nearest Field & Stream store.

Oh the girl at the bunker is dead. Castiel covers her with a sheet. Jack's eyes well up with tears.

Suddenly, a thought occurs to Jack and he pulls back the sheet. "The witch... Where's her body?" he asks.

Back in South Dakota, the gang is trying to figure out what to do with Alternate Kaia. "We should bring her to the station," Jody says. "No, we need to break her right here and now," Dean argues. Sam is kind of horrified and confused. Alternate Kaia explains.

Dean wants her spear because it's the only thing that can hurt Michael as far as they know, and he's "willing to do whatever it takes."

Then he literally plants his boot between her tied, spread legs and kicks her chair several feet across the floor.

Look, I'm not opposed to characters doing ugly things when it makes sense but this is uglier than they probably intended.

Oh okay so the witch's body is in the (heretofore unseen??) bunker morgue. How did they not notice that she's wearing the exact same pendant as Subplot Girl?

Back to Dean as grabs Alternate Kaia by the front of her shirt and gets in her face. "Where is the spear?" he demands. Maybe it'd be less awful if he hadn't also bullied OG Kaia into opening the rift in the first place. She just smiles at him. This would be a super great time for Jody and/or Sam to pull him the fuck off her.

But we cut back to the morgue. Jack exposits about how the witch was sucking out the girls' youth. It seems blatantly obvious, but everyone else needed to be kinda off so that he could realize he's still useful.

Jack breaks the witch's pendant and some mysterious green life force floats back into Subplot Girl's corpse. It works! She's as good as new, or at least not dead or wrinkly anymore.

Alternate Kaia says Dean is just like Michael, using threats and violence. She saw what he did to OG Kaia when he got mad. "You're a dream walker, too," Sam surmises. She was connected to OG Kaia her whole life and saw what she saw. Although, if that's true, then she should have known that Claire wasn't a real threat to her and not tried to kill her.

Flashback to Michael making her the same offer he made everyone else.

She doesn't want to join his side or give him her spear, so fisticuffs ensue. That's when she stabs him like a cocktail olive and it apparently hurts him enough that he'd give up his jaunty cap. I mean his ideal vessel.

The Field & Stream monsters have found the cabin. "We only came for her, but I was never one to turn down a buffet," one of them says. Man, same. The fight gets underway. Even though they're superpowered monsters, they just barely have the upper hand with the Winchesters and Jody. Dean manages to get his gun out and shoots the leg of Alternate Kaia's chair. She frees herself.

"Now you're in trouble!" Dean laughs to the monsters. Alternate Kaia leaps out the nearest window. "Or not," Dean quips. Although it would serve him right for her to leave them to it, she returns a moment later and spears one of the monsters through the back of his head.

She's put her hood back up, too. Does the hood also have magic properties?? She kills the other two monsters in as many seconds, then whooshes her spear around like it's a prop in a dance number.

Sam sensibly points out that the monsters will keep chasing her as long as she has the spear, but she's not exactly going to trust them after all that. They should have just asked her what makes it special. Maybe they could make one of their own.

As everyone makes their way out of the woods, Dean starts, "Jody..." But she stops him. "You have nothing to apologize for." Well... okay. She's more worried about what she's going to tell Alex and Claire, and she's sorry she barely got to know OG Kaia before she died. "I just feel like I already lost, before I ever even began..."

Back at the bunker, Castiel and Jack have a heart-to-heart. Cas beams with pride and it's very sweet. "You proved you have the mind of a hunter, and the heart of a hunter." He invites Jack to go on a hunting trip with him.Jack reacts like someone just asked him if he wants to go to Disneyland.

But then he gets a little cough. He plays it off like it's just a cold, but we all know what it means when someone gets a little cough in fiction.

Yep, he's one romantic duet with Ewan McGregor away from an untimely death.

On the road home, Dean feels like he can finally open up about his feelings a little now that we're in the denouement of the episode. He says he put them all in danger today. He didn't want to think about what Michael had used him for. "I just wanted to race ahead, skip to the end of the story... where I take out the bad guy."

Dean says he remembers feeling like he was drowning while he was possessed. I can't help but compare it to his "Heaven and Hell" speech and how moving that one was. But you know how the saying goes. You either die young or you live long enough to die young again, and then you live long enough to die when you're middle-aged, and then you live long enough to be possessed by the villain, and then you make a similar speech to the one you made 10 years ago.

Jack is sitting alone in his room when another coughing fit hits. This one is worse. This time he coughs up blood into a tissue. Hm... What's that I hear?

So that's where we end the episode. Do you think Jack will die? Do you think Jack will die and come back? Reblog with your guesses below!

And now’s the self-promo time when I add my Ko-Fi link! (ko-fi.com/A4017DA)

These are some very desperate times for me, so if you have a few bucks to spare and you enjoyed this recap, I would very much appreciate any donation. I know it looks like I’ve received quite a few donations but those larger ones were me “donating” to myself with credit cards to pay bills that had to be paid from my bank.

I squeaked by on rent this month, but bills and groceries still gotta be paid for. Hit a real snag when several clients just refused to pay me for my work.

Or my Paypal address is btippi@gmail.com and if you send it as a gift - I think no fees are deducted from my end.

[not-just-any-fangirl]

I would love to hear more about your NaLu son, I adore when they have a son

hoooo boy nonny. Are you ready? cus I sure as FUCK am

Igneel Dragneel

aka, Elly

because Elly could not believe his parents actually named him fucking Igneel Dragneel

he understands it’s after his deceased grandpa dragon but ffs his name is ‘Igneel Dragon-Igneel’ wtf mom

Elly is the first born, and as such, has decided it is his job to protect his little baby sisters from the gross men of the world. 

it is the world that needs protection from his baby sisters

they are literal fucking demons okay like imagine Natsu as a tween with Lucy’s cunning and intelligence

it is

bad

His hair has a pink tinge in the sun but mostly looks like a reddy blond. He usually keeps it short and with either one or both sides shaved. He has his father’s eyes and his mother’s nose

He has three ear piercings all in his left ear

His guild mark stamp is between his shoulder blades and is gold

Elly realizes he is gay when he is six and his best-friend-five-ever is talking about how cute Dreyar is and Elly wholeheartedly agrees. The two spend their recess planning the joint marriage to this poor boy, Azure Redfox in a pretty white dress and Elly in a pretty white suit and Dreyar in a black suit.

its basically that shitty ‘x has two hands’ meme but schoolyard love version

Elly can be very set in his ideas

see; his little sisters can do no wrong

like objectively he is aware that if something explodes within a ten mile radius it’s probably Luna, but he is always very confident there was a good reason for it

the reason was that a random dude stole her coffee from the basically-starbucks shop and she called a firey storm of righteous fury from the sky and blew him to shit

if he decides you’re a good person you could kill a man in front of him and he’d help you hide the body

alternatively, if he decides he doesn’t like you, you better buckle the FUCK in for one hell of a bumpy ride to change that idea

The boy has Natsu’s hatred of change and it drives his mother up the wall

He also has Lucy’s imagination and zero tolerance for bullshit attitude

Elly LOVES spicy food but he can also only take three bites before it gets to much and he needs to chug the milk gallon

Elly has a stuffed dragon he calls Mr. Scales and he will cut a bitch if they look at him the wrong way. 

so what if a wing has had to be sown on five separate times and it’s faded and black glass eyes are so scratched they’re grey it is his friend and he has aged like fine wine 

The easiest way to get Elly to do something is to tell him not to do it and give him no reason as to why not

If you explain to him he is likely to see the logic or at least respect you more for treating him like a fucking human but if you say ‘bcus I said so’ you can bet your ass he’s gonna climb to the top of the bell tower from the outside and fucking hit the lunch gong at 11:16 and fuck everyone’s internal clock up

This also manifests as a lot of spite and apathetic rage (how?? who knows) at homophobes

He’s usually lowkey bcus it was never made a big deal of in his family and you don’t see normal boys being extra straight and also while he gets crushes as easily as Lucy he cares for a real relationship about as much as Natsu

Mitsu: Hey, Gail was checking out your ass today

Elly: Oh that’s nice

Tatsu: Yesterday you literally said if you had a womb you’d carry his children

Elly: Yeah but have you seen  Ulijha’s eyes today?? Take me now please you green haired knight of muscle

Mitsu and Tatsu in synchronization: why are you like this

However he will deck out in all leather assless chaps and pride flags if he thinks for a hot second you have a problem with gay people

Lucy helps him bcus she’s so proud of her little boy standing up to bigots and she doesn’ for a second doubt his ability to punch out a motherfucker if someone tried to make it physical 

But he will do it in a way where the person is unsure if it’s just ironic timing or if Elly is being a Bitter Bitch and being passive aggressive

Elly gets irritated easily over minor things but that goes as quickly as it comes. Now if you really piss him off you won’t know until he snaps and then cuts you out of his life. Boy can hold a grudge. 

He may have inherited many things from his parents but forgiveness to the point of being a flaw is not one of them. 

There will be consequences if you’ve fucked up

Very, very, cold and painful consequences

MAGIC

Elly decides he wants to be a dragon slayer like his father, but fire always seemed so volatile to him and brash

he was always entranced with the winter and snow and Uncle Gray’s creation and manipulation of ice

Natsu is. Betrayed

how dare his own flesh and blood prefer to be like that Dick-sicle than his own father???

Lucy has to remind him that it was Natsu’s idea to make Gray the godfather of his children

Natsu asks how that has any relevance

Elly perfected his ‘do you see the shit I have to put up with?’ at a very early age due to his mother’s conversations with his father and mimicking her facial expressions

When Elly is twelve he asks if Gray can help train him alongside Natsu so he could practice both skills. 

Elly takes to ice like Luna to fire. His rate of learning and mastering dragon slayer techniques skyrockets, and over the years he also manages to combine lighting and ice dragon slayer magic, and shadow and ice dragon slayer techniques. 

Oh how the next generation builds on the work of their parents

Gray brings his son Tenkiame to the training session

Elly has known Tenten since he was born, but watching the nine month older boy train Awakens Things. 

Elly works even harder to train and get stronger to impress Tenkiame. He may also be a tad bit competitive and legit just wants to surpass him, but it’s mainly trying to get his attention and impress him. 

The first time he performs a successful Roar of the Ice Dragon he accidentally pins Tenkiame to the guild wall. 

Tenkiame doesn’t stop complain-bragging about it to everyone for a week

Elly is a flustered and mortified mess. 

As the years pass the crush fades but never fully goes away, but the boys grow to be inseparable. 

Tenkiame makes the first move and kisses him and Elly runs away for a month as he tries to process his emotions and the major change in his world

He runs away to Natsu’s old cottage and Lucy rolls her eyes but leaves her dumb seventeen-year-old son alone

He comes back with his tail between his legs and has a long and painfully awkward conversation with Tenkiame bcus even tho he’s Lucy’s son he is also Natsu’s and the boy does not use words to explain his emotions well

Tenkiame, however, can translate dumb dragon and listens patiently. 

Tenkiame has inherited his mother’s steadfast determination of ‘wait and the boy will come to you if you wear him down enough’

For most missions the group is Elly, Tenkiame, Azure and her fellow triplets; Aegen and Admirl. 

yes the triplets are named after shades of blue starting with A

Levy is a fucking linguist nerd what are you expecting here

Elly also goes on family missions with his sisters and it usually costs the guild a shit ton and a ver sincerely written letter of apology to whatever own they half destroyed

those trips are his favourite

bcus the boy will Kill for his sisters and they are his closest friends

Their favourite thing to say is ‘you’re like family to me’, and the other responding in the flattest voice ‘we are family numb nuts’

Tatsu: Mitsu, when you show me such devotion I can’t help but feel as though you truly are my sister

Mitsu: We’re twins dipshit. We shared our mother’s womb.

Mitsu: Also it’s a donut please chill for minute of your life

Elly: Did someone ask a Dragneel to chill?

Mitsu and Tatsu: No one asked you go and be gross in your boyfriend’s lap

Elly :(

Luna, without any emotion: oh my, whatever could be so delightful as a chilled Dragneel child. 

Elly: :D

Elly: You know, Lulu, if I were to have any siblings I feel in my soul that you would truly be my favourite sister

This got super long I’m sorry. It’s developed into a major shit post please take this before it get’s worse

[kevoreally]

#BuffyAt20 - S03E09 “The Wish”

Okay, so the irony is that I actually did this #BuffyAt20 a week EARLY so I wouldn't post it late. Then vacation got away from me. Oops. I'm doing this for free, go easy on me. Anyway, here it is! Onward we roll through 'Buffy' Season 3 with a true classic - "The Wish"! So many iconic aspects to this episode. Let's dive right in!

> Okay, I’ve been giving Cordelia a pretty hard time this season, and here is her centric episode. Let’s see how this goes…

> NRRRF!

> This squddly demon is so extra.

> “Isn’t he gonna go poof?” Love it

> Oh Xander, you’re really going to be Indignant Guy right now? Eesh.

> “Your logic does not resemble our Earth logic” - a line I use a lot

> Wow, did Xander just acknowledge Buffy’s emotional trauma from Angel in a positive and non-snarky way? It’s almost like growth.

> This shot of Cordy burning the pictures in a bowl was manipulated in the commercial to make it look like her wish was a spell, I don’t know who else remembers that.

> I think it’s that, no matter how melodramatic the show becomes at times, the theme song reminds you of what it is at heart: a light, fun, camp take on horror. It really sets the tone for the show and anchors it to that theme - ha, theme, double-meaning.

> I love Willow saying Amy saw Cordy at the mall, using a recurring character and refreshing our memory on them right before they come back in 2 episodes.

> Wait - why does the whole school know Xander cheated? Unless Cordelia said something, there’s literally no reason for anyone to know outside of the Scooby Gang. THAT’S BIZARRE.

> Do love the Jonathan cameo, though.

> Seriously, Oz is the best character that ever existed on this show so far. How is that possible? I better never see a Buffy remake that removes Oz, y’all. Just make him gay too or something, IDK, lol.

> The “do I have something caught in my teeth?” ploy is still awkward and dumb twenty years later, good to know.

> Okay, but is John Lee really that scummy compared to anything Cordelia has done over the last 43 episodes?

> “a good luck charm my dad gave me” says Anya, aka: D’Hoffryn! :D

> It’s wild seeing Cordelia interact with the character who would BIZARRELY end up almost marrying Xander. Like, it’s SO WILD thinking about the things they never imagined at this point in time.

> Buffy is another one whose emotional maturity is really knocking me out right now, that she’s sympathetic to Cordelia’s plight.

> Gosh, I miss 1998.

> It’s weird to me that there’s time for this “we can’t touch hands stuff” in the same episode as Bizarro Sunnydale. How is there TIME?

> Wait - do we even see Normal Giles in this episode?? Or is it all Bizarro Giles?

> Buffy’s “sneaky” stake toss when the Cordettes walk by after she kills the vamp is hysterical.

> That cut where Cordelia says her problem is Buffy Summers is SO AWKWARD.

> Yeah, we’re 15 minutes into a 45 minute episode - there’s a full 30 minutes in Bizarro Sunnydale. That makes more sense.

> I WAS RIGHT, apart from I think a few seconds at the end we don’t see Normal Giles in this episode once! Huh!

> “She was like… a good fairy.” Oh Cordy.

> Cordelia’s dress in this episode, the blue one, actually is bizarre. It’s like an evening gown.

> “Ted Cherviin just totally went for third with Ginger in front of everybody!” - being 12 when this aired, and also gay, I didn’t fully get what third base was yet. But now I do. And DAAAAAMN!

> This teacher is actually kind of hot, what’s his deal…

> Cordelia is talking SO LOUDLY about being from another reality. Where is her head??

> Is Cordelia even slightly sad that Xander and Willow are dead, do you think? Because we don’t really get much of a reaction there.

> “My auto! El convertablo?” OMIGOD, CORDELIA.

> Wow, once again, they are getting hella use out of this Main Street set.

> Do I find Xander hot as a vampire? Hmm.

> Wow, “Bored Now” is DoppelWillow’s first words.

> DoppelWillow is sort of a refined impression of Drusilla. And that’s okay, even! Just, noteworthy.

> The White Hats was the coolest part of this episode. Oz and Larry and Nancy who would later appear in Episode 19 as a student. Holy shit. I’m not saying I hate it, just that it isn’t entirely *scary.*

> The vampire den of sin trope was already pretty tired by the time this came to Buffy, and “Dead Soul Man” didn’t do it any favors either.

> OH MAN, the Master’s return was mind-blowing.

> The Master was stuck underground for, like, 80 years, and has only been back out for barely 2, and he’s bored of hunting again? What?

> Giles’s little JUMP from the Library’s upper level is intense.

> It’s wild but this episode STARTS as Cordelia centric and then, upon her death, becomes weirdly DoppelGiles’s story? This version of Giles is the hero of this story. All would’ve been lost if he didn’t thwart Anyanka. But we’ll get to that…

> Although Giles SHOULD know that Cordelia won’t be turned into a vampire and doesn’t need to be incinerated, it is consistent with the first episode that he isn’t sure. That’s pretty interesting.

> OMigod I almost forgot Angel is “the puppy.”

> “Yes, I’m aware that there’s a great deal of demonic activity in Cleveland. It happens, you know, that Sunnydale is on a Hellmouth. It is so!” This is literally one of the funniest lines of the whole fucking show, and that Cleveland bit has always been a fan favorite joke, which is why Giles references it in the series finale.

> HOW IS ANGEL’S HAIR STILL GELLED UP AS A TORTURE SLAVE??

> He’s also, like, extra wimpy.

> I might find DoppelXander scarier than DoppelWillow.

> even in Bizarro World, Larry is kind of a misogynist and Giles has a shitty car.

> EEEY! Buffy’s back! She misses about 1/3 of the episode.

> I am always a sucker for wonky alternate timelines that need to be reset, not gonna lie…

> If Giles knows he has to destroy the power source and he has it, why isn’t he just doing it? Like, RIGHT NOW?

> This Buffy is gross.

> Buffy’s not wrong - they know where the vampires nest, they could just firebomb the place during the day.

> Aww the Caged Dude from earlier is dead now. I think they were going for dark but he could just as easily be a different white boy so it’s hard to feel that one. Should’ve been Jonathan.

> Seriously, how does Angel’s hair look like that?

> If the Master rose, didn’t the Hellmouth open? Where’d those demons go?

> Oh man - is the Master’s blood factory supposed to be THE factory?? Like, Spike and Drusilla’s? Holy shit, I don’t think I ever caught that before. I hope so!

> I’m only annoyed that Giles is doing this ritual and summoning Anyanka and all this stuff when he, like, HAD the necklace? And in later seasons, all you have to do is smash?

> WOOF, this blood machine is pretty fucking horrifying, when you really think about it. That chick is very much alive.

> HA! The Master using Xander as a shield is great.

> “your only power lies in the wishing” “WRONG” HA!

> the way Buffy stomps up to the Master is a bit… silly, haha

> this score here, “Slayer’s Elegy,” is why once again I will always love Christophe Beck.

> Wow, so even in this time like, the prophecy that the Master will kill Buffy comes to pass.

> The tiny bits of Anya in this episode really show how the writers could’ve fallen in love with her.

> Yeah, there’s Normal Giles! But only for a minute.

> OH WOW, those last 7 minutes really flew by, to be honest. This isn’t always the strongest episodes, but I definitely think there’s something special about it.

> Next up: CHRISTMAS!!!!

[i-am-very-very-tired]

Whenever anybody asks about black women in comics, the immediate response is to bring up Storm. But Storm isn't the only black woman to rock superpowers and a costume. Here are 20 other black female characters in superhero comics who deserve more love and attention. Monica Rambeau (codename: Spectrum) was a lieutenant in the New Orleans Harbor patrol of the Coast Guard when she was bombarded with rays from space which gave her the ability to turn into any form of energy, and shoot energy at people. The first of a few peace officers to appear on this list — because for some reason a not insignificant number of these black women characters either come from law enforcement or the sciences. It would be interesting to see if this was simply to avoid the idea of stereotypes, or if their creation correlated with higher instances of black women going into law enforcement and science-focused careers. Monica is one of my favorite heroes, mainly because of her snarky, take-no-bullshit attitude, a trait she has in common with a quite a few other women on this list. She has a long history in comics including a stint as the leader of the Avengers. Fierce and powerful, she's been forced to change her name a number of times because people keep taking hers — she's gone from Captain Marvel to Photon to Pulsar to Spectrum. She originally changed her name from Captain Marvel to Photon so that Captain Marvel's son Genis-Vell could use the codename. Only to run into Genis-Vell a little later and find out that he had performed a name change of his own... to Photon. She was not happy. But that's how cool she is, everybody wants to bite her style. She also had a friendly/caustic conversation with Carol Danvers when she decides to transfer from using Miss Marvel to Captain Marvel. My only wish is that they would go back to her original afro hairstyle, which was awesome. ARC TO READ: Check her out in the Nextwave a 12-issue Limited Series written by Warren Ellis. It's a biting satire of superheroes, and teams where everyone is likeable exactly because they are so unlikable. Keep an eye out for the scene where Monica's remembers what being on the Avengers was like. CURRENTLY? Leading the Mighty Avengers field team. Anissa & Jennifer Pierce (codenames: Thunder & Lightning respectively) are the daughters of famous hero Jefferson Pierce (codename: Black Lightning), who really did not want his daughters to follow in his footsteps. He made them promise to graduate from college before they used their powers to become heroes. Anissa graduates with a pre-med degree, and later that same day her father walks in on her trying on her costume. Becoming a hero with no parental support led to a hard road and a number of near-fatal injuries for Anissa. Jefferson sees this and to make sure his younger daughter Jennifer actually has guidance, and signs her up for the Justice Society of America as a teenager. Even though they're sisters, their powers could not be more different. Anissa controls her density to the point of making herself invulnerable and creating shockwaves by stomping her feet or clapping her hands. She ran with The Outsiders for years, and eventually ended up in a steady loving relationship with Grace Choi (another of my favorite characters), which her father had some issues accepting at first. Jennifer, meanwhile, can turn herself into a being of sentient energy allowing herself to fly and shoot powerful bolts of electricity. The sisters rarely interact with one another, Jennifer was busy dealing with learning how to control her powers and Anissa's initial storyline revolved around her dad's disapproval of her choices and tension on the team with Grace (who she originally hated). Both girls are rather unique in being black second generation heroes. Rarely did black supers of their father's generation get a relationship that lasted long enough to produce children. Their interactions are an interesting insight in black superfamilies which you don't get a lot of outside of old Milestone comics. ARC TO READ: Catch Anissa in the One Year Later arc where the Outsiders are presumed dead. It starts with Outsiders vol. 3 #34 and reveals Anissa's relationship with Grace. Or catch the angry sibling beatdown between the two sisters as one defends their father and the other tries to arrest him which starts in Outsiders vol. 4 #32 BONUS ARC TO WATCH: The 2 DC Nation shorts featuring Thunder as a teenager and Lightning as a tween both ready to be heroes already are some of the better animation DC has done. You can see them on Youtube. CURRENTLY? In limbo. Since both The Outsiders & JSA currently don't have regular books coming out. Amanda Waller (codename: N/A) is a BAMF, period. And I mean the old-school Amanda Waller of size, accept no substitutes. Waller fought her way out of the Caprini-Green projects after the murders of her husband and daughter. A completely normal human, if completely normal humans have a titanium will and a cunning political mind, she chose to get into politics to change the world. With her "by any means" attitude she quickly rose through the ranks and transitioned into the shadow government. She is known as The Wall, and while it might have started as a fatphobic joke it stuck and became a point of pride because there is no one, literally no one (even Batman), who can work around or through Waller when she puts her mind to it. This is not to say she hasn't been tricked before but it happens rarely and she always, ALWAYS has a contingency plan. The 2011 reboot of DC slimmed her way down and came under heavy fire from fans not only because most of the character redesigns were pale copies of the originals but also because people saw her as one of the few characters of size in comics that wasn't defined by it. She is sort of the Nick Fury-analogue in of DC, except willing to do much darker deeds for what she considers the greater good. This has caused some to view her as a villain, in fact she ranks on a few "greatest comic villains of all time" lists but in reality The Wall is only always doing what she thinks is best. She's one of the better, if not the best, morally ambiguous characters in the DC Universe. ARC TO READ: Suicide Squad vol. 1, the original late 80's run with The Wall in total command. You can also see a lot of slick, determined Waller in Checkmate! vol. 2 CURRENTLY? In limbo. The new volume of Suicide Squad premieres this month but it seems unknown whether it will feature Waller or not. Charlotte "Charly" Beck (codename: Friction) was part of the Marvel Imprint - New Universe in the late 80s. In New Universe people were spontaneously developing abilities and many voluntarily checked themselves into clinics devoted to helping them...supposedly. Charly was in a college ballet class when suddenly she suffered an intense migraine and everyone around her started slipping and sliding. She had developed the ability to control friction, eliminating it entirely or allowing her to stick things to each other. She checked herself into the Center for Paranormal Research and was assigned a therapy group with other people who had suddenly developed powers - DP7 (also the title of the comic). The thing I loved about Charly and DP7 was that it was a super comic in that there were uncontrollable powers, shadowy conspiracies, and fighting for what was right but it also wasn't a traditional super comic in that none of their emotional/non-super problems went away or got shoved to a backburner because of they suddenly had powers. In fact often having the powers exacerbated the issues they were already having. For example, Charly's attempt at romance with a member of her therapy group who couldn't see himself with a black woman. This leads to a short stint in a militant black therapy group dedicated to fighting the racism present at the institute. The portrayal is not very nuanced but it was an interesting attempt at trying to talk about race in comics. DP7 also dealt with issues of domestic abuse, self-sacrifice, families of choice and emotional betrayal. I was actually a huge fan of a lot of the comics under the New Universe imprint, there was a revival called newuniversal in 2007 but it didn't last very long and to be completely honest lost some of the humanity that shone in the originals. ARC TO READ: Just start at DP7 #1 and read it all the way through. CURRENTLY? In limbo. DP7 was cancelled in '89 as was most of the New Universe creations however an alternate universe version of Charly did make an appearance in the Marvel title Exiles in 2006 so there might be some hope for her. Celia Windward (codename: Jet) is chosen alongside nine other people by the Guardians of the Universe (yes, the same ones who created the Green Lantern Corps) to be the next variation of their race, the New Guardians (which they take as their team name). They were granted immortality and each has power over certain fundamental forces of the universe. Celia was able to control electromagnetic energy. It's easy to dismiss her and her team, especially after they fought Hemo-Globin the "AIDS vampire" (yeah there's no excuse, none) and he infected Celia and Gregorio, the only openly gay member of the team (and arguably DC comics first gay hero). So yeah, that's some messed up BS, no one is arguing different but the team also actually dealt with some pretty heavy moral issues. They discussed how to achieve peace if you use force, they even flirted with the idea of giving up violence/fighting for good. It was also one of the more diverse teams in DC comics and they actually tried to deal with how people from such disparate backgrounds live and work together. So yeah there's a lot to recommend the series...if you can get past the whole 'AIDS vampire' thing which admittedly is a pretty high hurdle ARC TO READ: Millenium #1, the initial appearance of the New Guardians for sure. CURRENTLY? She died in New Guardians but since DC comics destroyed their long company history and recreated everyone she's been shown alive as leader of the Global Guardians. Which means maybe Gregorio will make a reappearance as well but the one great thing about the DC reboot - no more 'AIDS vampire' *poof* he never was! Philippus (codename: N/A) is an Amazon and over 3,000 years old. Queen Hippolyta's most trusted advisor. She was one of Wonder Woman's main trainers growing up and loves Diana like a daughter. She has held the title of Regent and Queen of the Amazons multiple times previously - when Hippolyta has stepped down or been stripped of her title. Phillipus is one of the most knowledgeable warriors in the world due to her extended age and training. Intensely loyal to Hippolyta and later (after Hippolyta's death, which is all kinds of dead potential lesbian wrong) admits to being in love with the queen for most of her life. She not only shows us that not all the amazons are white but is also devoted to the Amazon nation, going so far as asking permission of Hippolyta to injure Wonder Woman in training, to teach her a lesson in humility so she would be a better leader in the future. Sadly after Gail Simone left the Wonder Woman series the Amazons Attack miniseries happened (and the less said about it the better) and the Amazons began to be written as man-hating, antisocial sneaks. Sigh. ARC TO READ: Unfortunately Philippus has never been a main character but "Stoned" starting with Wonder Woman vol. 2 #206 is I believe when she becomes co-leader of the Amazons. Also any Wonder Woman run that Gail Simone wrote is guaranteed to be awesome and probably has Philippus being badass and terrifying, just like I like her. CURRENTLY? Deceased. :) Unfortunately there was a general de-powering/de-awesomeing of the Amazons before her death so it was a pretty ignominious/shameful death for a character with such a long history. Mari Jiwe McCabe (codename: Vixen) is originally from the African comic book nation of Zambesi. After the death of both her parents Mari takes the Tantu Totem that her family has always protected, which gives her the ability to mimic the powers of any animal that has ever existed on earth. The source of her powers has been played with and revamped a number of times, from being alien in nature to mystical. My personal favorite origin is the one that links her and Animal Man to the West African god Anansi. She became a model by day and superhero by night (modelhero? supermodelhero?). One of the most iconic moments in her history for me is when she's on a photo shoot on an island, goes on a swim and surfaces to find all her friends and co-workers killed. She goes on a full on rampage and kills the drug kingpin who murdered her friends in vengeance becoming afraid she's losing herself to the animals she channels she joins Suicide Squad for a while. This means she was under the leadership of another woman on this list, Amanda Waller. Vixen should get a special place in history because thanks to the source of her powers and his weakness toward magic she is one of the few beings in the universe who has cut Superman. ARC TO READ: Start with Justice League of America vol. 2 #1 and check out her plotline as her powers change completely and she's no longer able to take power from animals but instead steals the abilities of her fellow metahumans instead. Also the miniseries Vixen: Return of the Lion which is about Mari returning to her home village for the first time since she left to find and punish her parents killers. CURRENTLY? In limbo. She was a member of The New 52 Justice League for a short while until she was injured and became comatose. We've at least gotten confirmation she's not in the coma anymore. Martha Washington (codename: N/A) is the creation of Frank Miller. WAIT, don't skip the entry! Because I don't think I'm exaggerating at all by saying she is the most well rounded (perhaps only well rounded) female character Miller has ever created. She has emotions, drive, strength, the story allows her to be a hero and the conflict feels vibrant and real - the things that Miller often receives praise for. Like another woman on this list, Amanda Waller, she grew up in Caprini-Green though in the future and escapes it by joining the military. Martha Washington's life is a map in fucked up shit. Finding out that the powers that be truly don't care for anyone but themselves, facing multiple betrayals, becoming a hero, simply surviving, everything has been a struggle. The core of her story is about being a person who actually cares for others, who still has compassion and going up against a world that has mostly forgotten how to be a community or care for one another. Martha is that soldier who actually joined up to help others and her nuanced view of the world means she often has problems with the things she's asked to do and often goes off book. Most arcs will make you cry at one point or another but all of the despair and sadness is buoyed by the hope Martha brings. No matter how dark the situation Martha will not give up and it inspires others to do the same. I adore Martha, in fact I named my first Mass Effect player character Martha and altered her to look like her as well. When I think good, thrilling military science fiction she's one of the first characters to come to mind. Martha Washington is not really a superhero comic as much as a military-science fiction hero comic. Martha's stories are told in a number of limited series and one shots from 1990 - 2007 ARC TO READ: The first 4 issue miniseries, 'Give Me Liberty'. See how Martha grew up and joined the military. I pretty much guarantee you won't be able to stop with just the one miniseries. CURRENTLY? She's dead but unlike most of the women on this list it was after living to 100 and inspiring others to keep fighting for the freedom of others. So a rare "happy" death. Dr. Cecilia Reyes (codename: N/A) never had a codename because she's a doctor dammit! Cecelia was recruited into the X-men though very reluctant to join she turned them down a couple times first. Even after she joined she used her medical skills more than her power, which is a psionic shielding that protects her whenever she feels threatened. Dr. Reyes doesn't have great control over her powers in the beginning mostly because she really has no interest in training with them being much more focused on healing others on the team. Although this might also have to do with the fact that the shielding is psionic so she feels all the hits she takes even if there's no physical effect. This seems like a pretty fucked up consequence of a power, I mean sure you survive but you still feel all the pain. That's sucktastic! In many ways I love her because she's the first X-men team member whose powers doesn't form the majority of their identity/personality. She doesn't deny she's a mutant but it doesn't form the whole of her perception of who she is which is a perspective continually lacking in the X-men. Unfortunately Marvel didn't really know what to do with her and the more they shied away from her ambiguous attitude towards heroics and her focus on medicine and kept trying to make her into a warrior the more they lost what had made her unique. ARC TO READ: "End of Days" X-Men vol. 2 #100, Cecelia uses her powers in a way that changes her forever. CURRENTLY? In limbo. She returned to help the X-Men find the first five new mutants born after M-Day and has popped up here and there but hasn't had many prominent storylines in the last few years. Mercedes "Misty" Knight (codename: N/A) retired from the police force after she lost her arm trying to disarm a bomb and get it away from the crowd. Refusing a desk job she started a detective agency with fellow former officer Colleen Wing. They became known as the Daughters of the Dragon both for their ferociousness and their training in martial arts. At some point Misty gets a bionic arm. It's never really clear who gave her the original but every scientist in the Marvel Universe has taken a turn improving or replacing it including - Dr. Reed Richards and Tony Stark. Misty has long had an on-again off-again relationship with Danny Rand a.k.a. Iron Fist for years which has led to the Daughters of the Dragon teaming up with Heroes for Hire a number of times. In fact later on Misty took over Heroes for Hire, increased the roster and took on a management role. One of the reasons Misty is badass and interesting is that she is completely human, yes she has the bionic arm but it doesn't shoot plasma or give her magnetic powers, she's a former policewoman running with A-class heroes and able to hold her own. I choose to ignore the time her hair was drawn as an afro with straightened bangs and spit curls. Any artist who plans to draw a black woman's hair, please do some research! Ask a black woman. Anything! ARC TO READ: World War Hulk Aftersmash #1 in which Misty deals with the decisions she made during World War Hulk, the guilt and the repercussions. CURRENTLY? In limbo. Recently Misty Knight was part of the Fearless Defenders but unfortunately the book was cancelled in December 2013. Raquel Ervin (codename: Rocket) was a poor black girl who dreamed of being the next Toni Morrison. Unfortunately she didn't believe that she had the talent so instead she got involved with crime. It was while robbing a house with a group of friends that her life turned around. She realizes that the man who owns the house is an alien and convinces him to become the superhero Icon and take her on as his sidekick Rocket. He gives her a belt which allows her to control and direct kinetic energy, this grants her a number of abilities including flight, super strength, a forcefield and more. Originally she was a part of Milestone Comics which featured African-American heroes and freely discussed race. Raquel dealt with a lot of issues that poor of color communities deal with all the time. This includes becoming arguably the first teenaged mom superhero and helping her friend Flashback kick her drug addiction. There was very little stigma attached to either of these moments, the focus being how to deal with problems and overcome them rather than the 'suffering porn' so evident when many characters of color are given such storylines. Soon after becoming Rocket, Raquel discovers she's pregnant with her ex-boyfriends child. And while she does retires for a time while pregnant she returns to being Rocket again after giving birth to the child, Amistad Augustus Ervin - named after the famous slave-trading ship and her heroing partners' human alias. Since the Milestone universe has been folded into the main DC universe nothing much has been done with her but we do know she is still Icon's sidekick and has teamed up with the Justice League when needed. ARC TO READ: Start with Icon #1. I was going to recommend the whole pregnancy storyline but that starts at #3 so why not just start from the beginning? CURRENTLY? In limbo. She's made appearances in the mainstream continuity but no one seems to have done anything with her in quite a while. Ce'athauna Asira Davin aka Chante Giovanni Brown (codename: Queen Divine Justice) thought she was just a normal girl living in Chicago with her grandmother. In actuality she was heir to the leadership of the Jabari tribe which Black Panther had outlawed years ago because of their support/sheltering of the White Gorilla cult. She was recruited to become one of Black Panther's bodyguards/ceremonial wives, only then did she learn she was Wakandan by birth. She has no powers to speak of but has been trained in Wakandan fighting styles and has boots with vibranium soles that allow her to stick to walls and other feats. Eventually Man-Ape, Black Panther's old enemy tells her the truth about herself and her origins. Man-Ape introduces her to what remains of the Jabari clan, who view her as queen and tells her of Black Panther's role in her early life. She even learns that her grandmother isn't her grandmother at all but a trusted agent of Black Panther meant to keep watch over her. Normally this would be an excuse to turn a hero into a villain, luckily Queen is a nuanced enough character that this doesn't make her Black Panther's enemy. She does leave his service though and go to confront the woman who raised her. She knows nothing is black & white. Also the issue where she talks Hulk down and then talks to him about disenfranchisement and not smashing the property of the poor is perfection. ARC TO READ: "Seduction of the Innocent" & "Gorilla Warfare" in Black Panther vol. 3 #31 - 35. Queen learns the truth and confronts the liars in her life. CURRENTLY? In Limbo. She is still chief of the Jabari tribe as far as I can tell but her appearances have been almost non-existent for the past few years. Jelene Anderson (codename: Adept) is from Strikeforce Morituri, an alternate universe with the Marvel continuity in which an alien menace known as The Horde is attacking Earth and winning. The Morituri process is invented which will grant great powers to those biologically compatible with the process, enough to fight the aliens but it's also guaranteed to kill the subject within the year. One of the things that sets Jelene apart on this list and in comics in general is her strong belief in/connection with God. Jelene, in fact volunteers because of her strong religious convictions and maintains that conviction throughout her life. Unlike many stereotypes of christian characters, especially black christians, she was open-minded, friendly, non-judgmental and formed bonds with many of her teammates who don't share her values. The Morituri process granted her the ability to analyze any given situation and figure out the the needed neutralizing countermeasures even to the point of her own body producing chemical compounds to counteract poison. Her ability was one that looked like it might turn the tide in the war as she was able to analyze schematics of the Horde and after a little time understand them perfectly. During a raid in which a fellow Morituri, Marathon with whom she had been forming a romantic bomb used his own death to slow down her pursuers her own death finally caught up with her. The Morituri process killed by ramping up the individuals powers to the Nth degree. For Jelene this meant she started to exhibit actual full on cosmic awareness before going peacefully, content with what she had done in her time on earth. ARC TO READ: I want to recommend that people just read the entire run of Strikeforce Morituri because it's fantastic but at least read the first 13 issues. CURRENTLY? Deceased :( Victoria Ngengi (codename: Flint) is probably the toughest one on this list, and I mean sheer physical ability to take punishment. She's been burned by Xenomorph blood and survived, hell she got burned with the blood because she burst one apart - With. One. Punch. And yes those are the Xenomorphs from Aliens. She's invulnerable, the Xenomorph blood was the first thing to hurt her in years, and she has super speed but only in terms of reaction time and personal movement, so she can dress and undress so fast no one sees but can't run at the speed of sound. She became a part of Stormwatch young, after losing her parents to violence in Kenya and years as a ward of the Kenyan state. Unlike many of her Stormwatch compatriots Victoria did not have a darker outlook on life, she was an idealist through and through, working to make the world a better place. Stormwatch was based on a space station and when they notice an asteroid heading for earth they intercept. That's when they run into the Xenomorphs. Almost the entirety of her team is killed by Xenomorphs and originally everyone believes she was the only one to survive. She gives testimony as to what happened on the space station in front of the senate. She only survives because when the Xenomorph blood burns her she becomes disoriented and fell back into a lifepod which activated. She feels intense guilt about this but channels it into her work. She joins the mostly unpowered Stormwatch Achilles and tries to improve the world, eventually falling in love, marrying and then divorcing the team leader. She then rejoins Stormwatch Prime and then the whole world goes to shit with "World's End". ARC TO READ: There's a ton of Stormwatch you could read but I'm actually gonna recommend the wildC.A.T.s/Aliens one shot where Stormwatch gets taken down and the entire run of Stormwatch Achilles where she really shines. CURRENTLY? In limbo. I don't think anyone has seen Flint since Authority: World's End but that was previous to Wildstorm being folded wholesale into the DC main universe so there's hope she'll turn up again! Destiny Ajaye (codename: N/A) is the newest girl on this list. Some of us have been waiting for this miniseries for six years. The book Genius was one of two winners of Top Cow's Pilot Season back in 2008. The original Issue #0 had with the support of comic book heavies like Warren Ellis who wrote a whole blog urging people to vote for Genius. After much delay the entire 5-issue mini-series was released this past August. Destiny's power? She the best military mind of our generation. Genius presupposes that every generation has a military genius born into it: Alexander the Great, Hannibal, Napoleon, and now a 17 year old black girl in South Central Los Angeles. She's had the ability to think/see many steps ahead since she was a child and she's grown up seeing the injustice all around her. Finally Destiny decides to do something about it. Tired of police brutality, racism and corruption Destiny unites the gangs active in her neighborhood and secedes the three blocks they live in from the United States. One of the most interesting series to come out in the last few years, trust me you want to read this. ARC TO READ: Just read the whole Genius limited series, it's only 5 issues. CURRENTLY? Renewed for a second limited series, YAY! Karen Beecher (codename: Bumblebee) initially dressed in costume to provide an anonymous villain to provoke the Teen Titans because she believed they were taking her boyfriend, a member, for granted. When she finally revealed the ruse she was asked to join the team herself. While at first Karen was a more support character to her boyfriend Mal she slowly grew into a hero in her own right. And in my opinion a MUCH better here too, in my opinion. Admittedly I like Karen a little more than her presence merits because Teen Titans were my team growing up. She's most closely aligned with the Titans oft-restarted and never really successful west coast division (the stint where the entirety of the The Titans moved wholesale to San Francisco doesn't count, 'cause that was the main branch). A scientist, originally her powers stemmed from a suit she created which allowed her to fly and fire energy blasts but thanks to some random space energy (Note: if you didn't know randomly space energy can do anything - kill, grant powers, steal powers, mutate someone, revive someone - it all seems to depend on the color and made up name of the energy) has gained the ability to shoot energy blasts and fly without the aid of her suit. The downside is she's also been shrunk down to six inches tall and is stuck at that size. She has to take a daily medication to make sure her heart does not fail because of her tiny size. She eventually leaves The Titans and joins Doom Patrol, with her now husband Mal. The leader of Doom Patrol, the Chief, is working on growing her and she gained an inch and now stands at seven inches. ARC TO READ: It's hard with Karen because she so rarely got a main storyline but I would say the 22 issues of Doom Patrol vol. 5 is when she really shines, and also divorces her deadweight husband. CURRENTLY? In limbo. With Doom Patrol canceled in 2011 Karen is MIA. Is she now eight inches tall? Inquiring minds want to know! Dr. Beth Chapel (codename: Dr. Midnight) was a simple a medical student, whose mentor happened to be a doctor and a superhero - Dr. Charles MacNider aka Dr. Mid-Nite. After MacNider's death Beth is blinded by an oxygen explosion in her hospital and discovers she has the same ability as MacNider, in darkness she can see in with perfect clarity though she's blind in light. I don't think the question of why an ordinary oxygen explosion would have this effect is brought up beyond *shh, it's comics*, which is good enough for me! She tried out for the team Infinity Inc., along with Yolanda Montez (codename: Wildcat). The interesting part of Infinity Inc. is it was mostly made up of legacy heroes, the children (biological and adopted) of silver age heroes like Hawkman, Green Lantern, Hourman, Wildcat and more. Beth is different from most of them because the connection she has with her predecessor, Dr. Charles MacNider aka Dr. Mid-Nite, is a caring mentor-student one rather than parental. Unlike the other doctor on this list, Dr. Cecilia Reyes, Beth wanted to be a hero but she also continued in her profession as a doctor wearing special lenses that allowed her to see in sunlight to do both. She pretty much exemplifies the complaints of disabilities being used for show or power without any actual thought to disabled people and how they live every day lives. Characters are rarely shown living with their disabilities and in fact their powers allow some work around so it's like they have no disability at all. And yeah...that's Beth. I enjoyed her time on Infinity Inc. though. She was often the voice of reason and the one who tried to talk her teammates out of rash and really just stupid decisions. Her interracial relationship with Hourman is also of note not only because it's a bit of a rarity in comics when it comes to black superheroes who are often just paired with the nearest other black hero (for example: Black Panther & Storm) but also because the interracial nature of their relationship was acknowledged but not focused upon as the only thing about their relationship. This makes her subsequent death all the more disheartening. Along with Yolanda Montez (again), she and a number of other heroes were recruited to fight Eclipso. They were all killed by the villain. ARC TO READ: You can just read the whole run of Infinity Inc. which is awesome or if you want the death arc go for Eclipso vol. 1 #11 - 14 CURRENTLY? Deceased :( This was before the DC reboot though, so the death probably isn't canon anymore...hopefully. The final two entries are questionable because the fact they are black is not definitive. Priscilla Kitaen (codename: Voodoo), in so many ways she is the most stereotypical character on this list - the teenage sexpot stripper with a heart of gold who loves to wear revealing clothing and seduce men for information. Now none of those things are objectively bad but it's a default when it comes to women in comics. It's unfortunate because the moments when she is just a character in her own right are amazing. Priscilla came into her power when it was discovered she had Kheran ancestry. Recruited onto a team of other full and partial Kheran people stranded on earth she fought in a shadow war against the Kherans historic enemies - the Daemonites, also stranded. The Daemonites can possess everyday people easily and Priscilla has the power to not only see beyond the surface but also to exercise a Daemonite from its host. The reason she's in the questionable section of this list is because the fact that she is part African-American is only brought up when they need to justify something like her learning/dealing with the religion of Vodun and almost completely ignored otherwise. There's also an unfortunate coincidence (I'm giving them the benefit of a doubt) that in addition to being the only part brown person on the team she's also the only one who is part Daemonite. Okay so if there's all these negatives why is she on this list? Priscilla is actually - if you tally all of her powers or potential powers from her Kheran ancestry, her Daemonite ancestry, her psychic abilities, her military training and her vodun training - potentially one of the most powerful heroes in the DC universe. They very rarely acknowledge her powerful nature long term but she's basically and immortal, psychic, warrior-vodun priestess which is kinda awesome. Also because at the hands of talented writers she becomes an amazing character. When she discovers the cause she's been fighting for all this time is false and the Kherans back home are pretty much racist and privileged. She's the first to rebel, even against people she considered friends and mentors. This marks her departure from the wildC.A.T.s, unable to trust most of them again and though she's returned a couple times since it's never permanent. Priscilla is one of those characters you love for her moments of awesome and because of what she could be. ARC TO READ: WildC.A.T.s vol. 1 #21-#27 The storyline where they return to Khera, some deep moments of politics, betrayal, friendship and tradition. CURRENTLY? Since Wildstorm has been folded into the main DC universe she had her own series that lasted 12 issues and has been popping up here and there in other comics. Pantha (codename: N/A) was an experiment by the Wildebeest Society. In an attempt to create host bodies strong enough to host the evil spirits who possessed their leader, Jericho (it's a long unsatisfying story, just go with it). Pantha was the only experiment to survive initially. She had no memory of her past even had no idea if she had started as a human or a panther which is I hesitate to put her on the list at all. However a number of other sources list her as a black woman which I hope is based on an alternate version of Pantha we meet in Booster Gold named Rosabelle Mendez, who was a vet student kidnapped and sold to the Wildebeest Society by Max Lord. Though this can probably be taken as her canon origin I'm a purist and if it's in an alternate world it's always questionable. Either way Pantha was an awesome character, completely antisocial and violent she was more interested in discovering what was done to her and clawing the responsible parties eyes out than making friends. The draw of her character was seeing her grow and change while never losing her edge. She came to care for a couple of people but overall was disdainful of company and thought people were betrayers and a waste of time. by the hands of crazy superboy. One of her biggest changes came with the last Wildebeest experiment they managed to save Baby Wildebeest, who was a child but when angered could grow to tremendous size and strength, imprinted on Pantha as Mama. Though she wasn't happy with it she eventually came to care for Baby and formed a relationship with russian superhero Red Star. She eventually moved to Russia with him and Baby. Then her and Baby died :( ARC TO READ: The New Titans #109 -111 the search for who she really is continues CURRENTLY? Deceased :( (along with Baby Wildebeest) :(((( This is the death I'm saddest about because both of their deaths were such throwaways. You know how every comic fan has that one ignored character that if they ever got to write for comics they would choose to write? Mine is Pantha. So final sign off is this: #BringPanthaAndBabyWildebeestBack!

[spynotebook]

I’ve been a huge fan of Aziz Ansari’s Netflix comedy, Master of None, since its first season. However, if you’ve inhaled Season 2 like I have, you already know that this installment of Dev Shah’s story takes things up to a whole new level. What’s more, it’s exactly the kind of show that can contribute to saving the world. Or, at least saving television. **SPOILERS AHOY IF YOU’VE NOT YET WATCHED MASTER OF NONE S2**

After his break-up at the end of Season 1, Dev is single and has a life-changing time studying pasta making in Modena, Italy for several months. As was the case in Season 1, we walk with Dev (Aziz Ansari) as he tries to find love, but we’re also with him as he garners some greater success in his career. However, it’s the kind of success that’s financially lucrative, but doesn’t necessarily feed his soul. At the end of the day Dev, like all of us, wants to feel like a part of something bigger than himself in order to find fulfillment.

However, even more than was already the case in Season 1, it’s not just about Dev finding fulfillment. Ansari seems to be trying to give voice to the wants and needs of a diverse swath of New York characters. In addition to the diversity of voices, Master of None is also a platform for diverse ideas: about relationships, gender, sex, career, and aging.

Through the prism of this diversity, the show explores the very millennial fear of FOMO (fear of missing out) and how many thirty-somethings these days are struggling with needing to choose between emotional and financial fulfillment/success, and figuring out whether they’re making the right choices for their lives.

Here are five specific ways in which Master of None is single-handedly fixing television (and quite possibly making the world a better place in the process):

It’s a Dude-Focused Unapologetic Rom-Com

Usually, we’re all about having female-led projects all up in this piece. However, when it comes to media’s role in subverting gender roles, it’s equally important that there be alternative versions of male stories that don’t buy into the cookie cutter shoot-em-up-punch-it-in-the-face destruction narrative men are constantly fed. Master of None being a genuine romantic comedy from a male perspective is hugely important. People are doing a lot of comparing to Woody Allen (ugh), but in his projects, or a zom-rom-com like Shaun of the Dead, the films feel like they’re apologizing for being romantic comedies. They’re very much male movies.

This isn’t to say that Dev isn’t “acting male enough,” but the show makes no apologies for stereotypically “feminine” qualities. It is unapologetically sweet, and kind, and the characters (both male and female) are genuine and earnest when talking about their emotions.

It Shows a Kind of Male Friendship We’re Not Used to Seeing on TV

When men are friends, they totally don’t sit around talking about their feelings. In fact, if we’re to believe what we see in media, men generally just grunt at each other and never talk about emotions at all. When they do talk about feelings, they make jokes about them, lest anyone think they’re actually talking about their feelings. All of that is true, right?

Dev and Arnold on Master of None shows us something else. These guys are plenty funny and snarky with each other, but it has nothing to do with covering up or apologizing for their emotional lives. When they’re sad or confused, they’re sad or confused, and they go to each other to figure stuff out.

When Arnold bemoans his ex getting married to someone who looks very much like him, Dev listens patiently and tries to make him feel better, then gently points out that Arnold has been on a dating app called “Hi Cuties” swiping on a full stable of women he’s been dating. He knows his friend, and he knows that as much as Arnold is lamenting the loss of this particular girl, he’s not actually looking to settle down just yet.

As Dev confronts his emerging feelings for Francesca, Arnold is an encouraging bud, but he also keeps it real and lets Dev know when he should pull back, or stop thinking about it.

And then there’s the unabashed fun they have together: singing theme songs about their favorite things, role-playing confessions of romantic feelings, Dev leaping into Arnold’s arms when he sees him after a long time away in Italy…these two are not shy about expressing how happy they make each other, and that’s amazing to watch.

It Actually Portrays New York City As the Diverse Place It Is

So many TV shows are set in New York City, and as a native New Yorker, I always find myself getting pissed off by how white the shows often are. Granted, it’s very true that people tend to congregate and form friendships with people who are like them. Girls, for example, didn’t bother me because the four protagonists were white. There are plenty of all-white small groups of friends in New York. What bothered me was that damn near everyone else around them was white, too! I was like, “What New York are YOU living in?”

Meanwhile, Master of None does two things really well. First, it portrays Dev as having the mixed and inclusive friendships I experienced in New York. He has a “token white friend” in Arnold, a Korean friend in Brian, and his childhood bestie, Denise, who is a black lesbian. He also has Indian friends with whom he can commiserate. Dev doesn’t hang with one type of person. He regularly interacts with people from all over the racial and ethnic spectrum, because that’s how you do in New York.

Second, it portrays the wider diversity of the city. When Dev dates, he also dates all over the racial and ethnic spectrum. Season 2 found him dating and pursuing white women, black women, Indian women, etc. And then there’s the brilliance of Episode 6 of the season, “New York, I Love You.”

In this episode, we stray away from Dev and his friends and instead follow a diverse swath of random New Yorkers living their lives. There’s the Latino doorman who’s privy to way too many resident secrets. There’s the deaf couple in a store signing “loudly” to each other about their sex life to the point where the mother of a child who speaks ASL comes up to them to reprimand them for saying “vagina” so often (this segment had absolutely no sound, which was an added touch of brilliance). There was the African cab driver who sleeps in bunk beds in an apartment with four or five other dudes and they all go out for a night of clubbing and end up meeting a group of pretty women and hanging out all night after-hours at a fast food restaurant.

Master of None doesn’t give a crap about making New York “palatable for middle America” by whitening it up, or only showing an affluent New York. It shows New York as it is. I moved out to L.A. five years ago, and I’ve come to love it here, but Master of None makes me remember all the great things I loved about my hometown.

Master of None Zooms In on People and Things That Don’t Normally Get Attention

Rather than devote the entire 10-episode season to Dev’s search for love, Ansari chose to have standalone episodes that dig deeply into groups and situations that don’t normally get media attention. In addition to the aforementioned “New York, I Love You,” there was also the third episode of the season, “Religion,” which was entirely devoted to Dev and his family’s relationship with Islam as they are visited by devout relatives, and Dev’s dad demands that they put on a show of how devout they are while the fam is in town. Meanwhile, Dev’s young cousin wants to try pork for the first time. Dev lets him, and his cousin lets loose, wanting to go to a food festival and eat all the pork things. In the end, Dev must confess to his relatives that he’s not as devout as all that. At first, his mother is upset, not because she’s particularly devout herself, but because she sees Dev’s lack of interest in Islam as a failure in her parenting. Dev meets her halfway, and starts thumbing through the Q’uran. It’s a beautiful look at average Muslims engaging, or not engaging, in prayer and tradition, and navigating all of that in a way that I’m sure people from every religious tradition navigate those things. In fact, the episode starts with a series of children of all faiths being dragged to houses of worship against their will.

The masterpiece of the season was the episode “Thanksgiving,” which we’ve already talked a lot about. Here, we see a coming out experience for a woman of color, a rarity when so much gay media is devoted to the coming out stories of skinny, white men. An amazing performance by guest star Angela Bassett as Denise’s mom anchored a beautiful telling of Denise coming into her own as a queer woman. Over a series of Thanksgivings from the 1990s through todayin which Dev takes part every year, Denise comes into her own, eschewing dresses for baggy pants and baseball caps, realizing that her interest in hip-hop videos and Jennifer Aniston have more to do with her interest in women than it does with either hip-hop or Friends, and she eventually comes out to her mother and starts bringing girls home. Her mother, meanwhile, has that all-too-familiar push-pull of shock, and fear. Wanting her daughter to be happy, but also being afraid for what might happen to her. In the end, Denise and her mom end up solid when her mom sees her with a woman that’s actually good for her, and who actually makes her happy. And who doesn’t have a really obscene Instagram handle.

These two episodes in particular shine a spotlight on groups that deserve a spotlight, but rarely get one.

Let’s Hear It For Women and Older People!

One of the things I love about the character of Dev Shah is that he genuinely cares about women as people, and he’s not a person who’s dismissive of his elders. These are two things that don’t need one-off episodes at this point, because they’re baked into the DNA of the show.

One of the main storylines this season had to do with Dev’s latest gig hosting a show called Clash of the Cupcakes, which is Executive Produced by an Anthony Bourdain-inspired chef and TV personality named “Chef Jeff” Pastore (played brilliantly by Bobby Cannavale), who becomes a good friend of Dev’s, and gives him great opportunities, and who seems like a really cool, down-to-Earth dude…until it emerges that he’s all about sexual harassment. Dev has become friends with a female make-up artist on the show he ends up doing with Chef Jeff, and when she suddenly leaves the job, he finds her and asks her where she’s been. She tells him that Chef Jeff started getting really inappropriate with her, and that she wasn’t the first or the last.

Rather than not believing her and “siding” with his friend, he immediately gets uncomfortable and suspects that she’s telling the truth. It’s a small thing, but in a world where real-life women have trouble getting actual law enforcement to believe them about sexual harassment and assault, it’s important.

And then there’s Dev’s parents and Brian’s dad. Dev’s parents (played by Ansari’s real-life parents) were a standout in Season 1, and they are equally important to Season 2. In both “Religion” and in the episode “Door #3,” Dev’s dad plays an important role in teaching Dev the importance of devoting yourself to the things and people you love, even if it means doing things that are difficult (like pretending to be religious sometimes, or doing a TV show that isn’t exactly art). Dev’s mother is hard on him, but always lets him know that she’s proud of him and that she respects him as a person. Both parents are fully fleshed-out characters who are unique in the TV landscape.

Brian’s dad got a dating storyline this season and had to choose between two women he was seeing. The wonderful thing is that Brian talked to his dad about it enthusiastically. There wasn’t any sarcasm or eye-rolling involved, but rather, genuine interest and love. At first, Brian’s dad tried to have an open relationship with the two of them, which is certainly not conventional to portray on a TV show (especially in a media landscape that likes to pretend that older people don’t exist period, let alone have love lives), and then when they’re not into that, he at least gets to have a dog (which he may or may not have stolen from one of them).

Master of None treats all people with respect, and pays them the respect of giving their voices a platform. I desperately wish that more television shows would follow Master of None‘s example. This show proves that one isn’t sacrificing “being universal” when one chooses to be inclusive and culturally-specific. In fact, it’s being specific when it comes to race, ethnicity, body type, religion, ability, age, or class that allows a show to speak to more people.

Thank you, Netflix. And thank you, Aziz Ansari. Your world and media-saving efforts are appreciated.

(image: Netflix)

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[bestwishes86]

Open Container - A Wolf Creek Short Story

“I got a good feeling. It doesn’t happen. Very Often.” Phoebe Bridgers

When David got the call he was just sitting down in his living room with “Game of Thrones” on his 42 inch flat screen. The fresh bowl of Pop Secret and a Heineken sat on the polished coffee table. Hadley was at the Tailgating party for the Puritans and he was on call with the station. He had spent the morning cleaning the upscale brownstone once back from Seattle to clear his head. The drive with that gay asshole had fucked with him more than he wanted to think about. So he had busied himself, not thinking about him walking out of the missing woman’s shower naked. He could still see the words in other languages and black swirls running across that pale skin. As he had polished every surface he could still see the tattoos had covered even the plump flaccid cock between those thick legs.

His bookshelves were filled with paperback novels from the eighties and nineties and every Disney movie with the large white boxes and the faded art and a selection of dvds. The books and movies had belonged to his parents and he couldn’t bring himself to throw any of it away. His wife Penelo had done the decorating and so three oil paintings of landscapes in polished wood frames hung on the walls on either side of the flat screen.

David sat on the soft dark leather couch and was pulling his remote to him when his phone rang. Internally he thought about ignoring it incase it was another call about cow tipping or another horrible trip to Seattle to pick up another gay asshole who smelled like honeysuckle and blood. Seeing the name LInds on the caller id he grabbed it and swiped right to answer it.

“Deputy, do you know a Jon Redding?” the deep voice of the Siren by night hard as nails, raven haired woman asked.

“Yes...why?” David asked slowly, staring at the burning emblem of the show and the paused status bar at the bottom of the screen.

“You should probably cut him off, he’s down here talking about loving someone who didn’t exist and getting thrown into posters and that's not what the boring patrons want to hear, now is it?” Linds asked as she looked at the usually handsome bearded man who looked ready to pass out or throw up sitting alone at a table. The other customers were human ones and she had sung two of her magical songs to distract them from him. David felt a headache building behind his furrowed brows but he still rose from the couch and hung up the call and grabbed his keys.

Jon stared at his empty glass, his mind muddled by the many drinks that had come before as he thought about that alternate version of himself. While he was a short, muscular young man covered in witches spells. That dreamed up version was a chubby, pasty coward. He missed feeling that weak and vulnerable and the way Pete had looked at him. Jon shook his head at the memory of the tall, pale muscular teenager with those green eyes and that square jaw. But it was too late, he remembered the dream Pete had been in and been gutted in. Tears burned at the corners of his eyes

“It wasn’t real, none of it.” Jon shouted to himself and all the bar patrons glared at him as they had every outburst he had made in the last hour. He knew it was stupid, knew it was a waste of emotion but those feeiings he had felt in that mental prison had become a part of him. He had been quiet the entire drive back with that asshole homophobe because he was etching into his memory those three dreams because of Pete. The witch he had planned on eating had trapped him inside her mental prisons had made the imagined world so real he had created real feelings.

“This seat taken,” a gruff pissed off voice asked and Jon waved a hand in acceptance and grimaced at the loud scrapping of the wood against the concrete floor. David plopped down and held a hand up for the waitress. HIs brown eyes looking over Jon, the man had worn a dark blue sweater and jeans with loafers. David thought about his old Smashing Pumpkins t shirt and pajama bottoms and barefeet. He chuckled at this but when the red in the face spikey haired man looked at him, his smile fell away.

“You….” Jon said growling in distrust

“Hey man, Heard you were drinking here so I came by too,” David was cut off by Jon

“You came here dressed like that to drink with me, no offense but unless you’re going to knock me out and take me back to your house for a hard fucking, i’m gonna pass.” Jon said looking David up and down and reaching for his glass having forgotten it was empty. He grimaced at the mere hints of alcohol in it and waved for the waitress while David glared at him.

“Do you have to go straight to sex every time i meet you.” David said between gritted teeth.

“We’ve met twice. Second, what else am I good for? Never mind that last point. You don’t even know me is what I'm trying to say.” Jon slurred in a voice that was something between indignant and a purr. David rolled his eyes at him and Jon slumped back in his chair.

“Why would I want to? I’m just here to make sure you don’t talk about shit you promised you wouldn’t.” David paused as the waitress appeared he ordered two Rum Punches and a Budwiser.

“I didn’t say you could buy a drink for me,” Jon said as he closed his eyes

“I didn't, those are all for me.” David said as he glared at LInds who waved apologetically.

“Ok. Did the bartender alert you to me talking too much,” Jon asked and Davd nodded.

“I just...never mind it’s stupid once you’re drunk we can leave,” Jon said as the two red glasses and the bottle arrived.

“You want anything,” David asked, his expression softened as he smelled the sadness coming off Jon and heard the pain in his voice. Jon reached for one of the rum punches and David smacked his hand.

“Mine,” David said drawing the glass away from the drunkard, he continued, ”I meant something else. I got you for it, I already covered your bill,” David said and Jon thought about it for a moment and asked for a Bud Light. David raised an eyebrow but placed the order the two sat in heavy silence. David occasionally glanced at the drunk man stare at the table and the empty glass, it was clear his mind was somewhere else. David finished his first drink and curled his toes on the cold floor. Jon’s beer arrived and David watched Jon drink half of it one go. He watched the Adam’s apple bob with each swallow before he looked away.

“Have you ever missed someone you shouldn’t,” Jon asked and David sat up uncomfortable as he looked at Jon. The image of the beautifully deformed half woman half wolf chained to walls in an institution flashed in David’s mind.

“Yeah, hurts all the same.” David said solemnly thinking of his wife. His Alpha had told him to kill her, to end her suffering but he couldn’t. So he had driven her to that asylum and chained her up himself. Her human mind was gone, buried inside the feral wolf mind that ruled that malformation.

“It really really fucking does. In that place that woman held me, there was a boy my mind made up. He was...kind to me. The first person in my life to be kind to me ended up being my own imagination...how fucked is that.” Jon said and as he admitted it two large tears began their descent down his cheeks. They were soon chased by more and he quietly wept. He didn’t care if David said something else assholey to him. If the bar patrons kicked him out, none of it mattered as he watched the large stainless steel meat hook burst out of Pete’s broad chest. His mind had drifted back to that nightmarish prison he had been kept in. He and Pete had run from the blank faced woman up the stairs of his home to his bedroom and locked the door behind them. It had happened so suddenly as they had caught their breath. She had burst through the wood, her scream almost deafening as Pete had run at her with his chair as a weapon. She had smacked him away so effortlessly and then glowered at him.

Jon had stood there frozen in horror as the woman took slow strides toward him, she had reached into that dusty overcoat and pulled the metal hook from it and it caught the light of the room and glistened. He had wanted to brave, wanted to try something to save them but he had been so afraid. Pete had run in front of Jon to save him from it in that made up nightmare. Jon could feel the moment when life left Pete’s body. It was if something was pulled from his body, ripped away with that second in life. It didn’t matter if it was real or not, it had felt real to him.

Strong hands were on his shoulders, he felt his body rising up as he was swung up into someone’s arms but he didn’t care. He kept his eyes closed as he was carried out of the bar. The cool night air felt heavenly on his face. He buried his head against the hard flat chest he was pressed against. Jon focused on the heart beating strong beneath the shirt and skin and muscle there. It was real, in that drunken moment it was the only thing real to him.

David had felt his wolf howl in pain watching the quiet crying, he had tried to ignore it. But that open honest act of feeling had struck him in the gut. He had looked around and saw that the once loud raucous bar was silent as everyone watched Jon. That had been what caused him to rise from his seat and carry him out. Carrying the muscular man might have been hard for a normal man but for one with preternatural strength it was like carrying a newborn pup. He ignores the gravel that dug into the skin of his bare feet as he listens to the steady heart beat. Keeping Jon close to him kept his wolf from howling in mourning so he did. Linds was behind him a few steps, she silently watched him, he could feel her eyes on his back as he made his way through the packed parking lot to his truck. The tall, slender, dark haired woman wore a red velvet corset that pushed up her sizable chest and painted on black jeans and boots. Her race’s language was tattooed across her arms in dark blue swaths of color. She opened the door for him and he placed Jon inside.

It wasn’t til he buckled the seatbelt that she spoke. There were only a few reasons Sirens were ever silent and he knew it wouldn’t be good but he listened, his focus on making sure Jon was secure.

“I’ve seen your future, the same as I saw it when your daddy broke your right arm. The man I saw you kissing in your future, he’s that man there. He is exactly as I described it to you 15 years ago. You came here the instant you heard it was him. That means something Davey,” Linds said and David whirled around to face her. His brown eyes burning gold with the power of his wolf burning right beneath his skin.

“Jesus H. Christ Linds!!! I don’t fucking need this shit. This man is the top suspect in a woman’s disappearance. My wife is in a fucking padded cell. Everytime I see her she rips my throat out and I watch her eat it. And you’re here reminding me that 15 years ago my dad took a hammer and shattered my elbow. Spit on me and called me a faggot, all for this sad sack of shit who was in your bar mooning over a made up teenage crush that I am jealous of.” LInds eyebrows shot up the same as his as he realized what he said. He couldn’t take it back. Linds watched the lean werewolf vibrate with shock and anger. She knew she should be afraid but all she wanted to do was the same thing she had done when they had been teenagers. She reached out for him but he took a step back, not trusting the low growling wolf inside his soul.

He had sat in that bar watching those tears and selfishly wished they had been for him, not some made up boy. He felt immature and selfish and wanted to be alone but instead he fished his keys out of his pocket and stormed around to the driver’s side of the truck and got in and without a word drove off as Linds watched him go.