#looks at tag: 100% husband material

[andy-clutterbuck]

Edgar Bradley The Murmuring | Guillermo del Toro's Cabinet of Curiosities (2022)

[lxvemaze]

shinee bf! headcanons

pairing: ot5!shinee x reader

tag: fluff!!

warnings: n/a

a/n: this is my first time writing in this format, so pls show this some love if you like it !!

more under the cut!

⚝onew

quietly attentive. he doesn't often tell you how much he loves you, but you can see it through his actions. NEVER lets you pay for dinner. he's always sneaky about it, but even if you put your card down, he subtly exchanges your card with his so you don't have to pay a single cent. he's always interested in what you're doing! even if you're just reading a book on the couch or doing your makeup, he's watching attentively and asking questions. he loves to listen to you talk about your day. as soon as you come home from work or from a day out with friends or family, he's asking you how your day went, what you did, if you had a good time, etc. he wants the details, too. so don't leave anything out! he just loves spending time with you. you could be doing the most mundane tasks, and he'd be looking at you with the most loving face. seriously, you could just be like, cleaning the fridge and he'd be staring at you like 🥹 overall, jinki is the most attentive and loving boyfriend you could ask for<3

⚝jonghyun

very loud about his love for you! words of affirmation are 100% how he shows his love in your relationship. you could have just woken up, crust in the corners of your eyes, your hair a mess, stinky morning breath, and creases on your face from laying on the pillow, and he'd just be like "you're so pretty :3" like, omfg. he loooves showing you off, but still likes to keep your relationship private. it's very conflicting for him. he loves taking you to dinner with his family! he loves to watch you talk with his mom while making food and drinking wine. i think he'd like to let you lead the way in the relationship, just so he knows that you two are always doing things that you love and are comfortable with. but!! if you don't feel like making the decisions and just want him to take you out and make the decisions, he's more than happy to do so! he just wants you to be happy :))) overall, jjong wants you to feel as happy, loved, and comfortable as possible in the relationship! (literally my dream man 😔✊️)

⚝key

kibum loooves going out and showing you off !! but unlike jonghyun, he doesn't gaf about keeping your relationship private- he wants everyone to know that you're his and he's yours! will spoil you to no end! you two could just be walking down the street, and you'd point out a cute skirt or something in a store window, and he'd immediately walk in to buy it for you. he treats valentines day like the most important day of the year. he'll pull out all the stops- breakfast in bed, gives you little presents throughout that day, takes you out for a FANCY dinner (probably reserved the whole restaurant for a few hours just so you two would be the only ones there), he even picks out your outfit and jewelry for the day so you two can match. speaking of which!! he loooves wearing matching outfits! not in a tacky, literally wearing the exact same clothes kind of way- but a "classy" matching. like, wearing the same color scheme. just something subtle as another way to show the world that you two are together. in conclusion: kibum is quite literally obsessed with you, and he wants EVERYONE to know it.

⚝minho

immediately obsessed with you from the beginning of the relationship! he is the single most husband-material man in the world, idc. will make you breakfast in bed as often as he can! even if you guys don't live together, he'll literally doordash a breakfast burrito or smth to your house just so he's sure you eat something in the morning. probably starts looking for rings just a few months into the relationship- but he won't tell you that bc he doesn't wanna freak you out. he's so sure that you're THE ONE, though. acts of service is 100% his love language. he just likes doing the little things for you! whether it's hanging up your jacket when you come home from work, washing the dishes, or learning how to make your favorite food, he's more than happy to do it! probably learns how to braid your hair! idk, i just feel like that's something he'd do. like, he'd wanna learn how to braid your hair so it's out of your face while you're sleeping</3. he loves talking about your future together! marriage, kids, retirement, all of it! he just loves to imagine your life together<3. minho is the guy that's in it for the long haul- he's the one you know you're gonna grow old with.

⚝taemin

he's a little weird!! but you love him, so it's okay!! just has the oddest little ways to show his love for you. like, i feel like he bites?? not hard, it's really more like, mouthing?? like, you guys will just be sitting on the couch watching tv, and he'll just gently bite your shoulder. and he'll stay there for a while, just like, holding your skin with his teeth. he likes to send you songs that remind him of you, but sometimes they're just so?????? like, he'll send you a song and be like "this came on shuffle and reminded me of you :3" and you're just sitting there confused like, bro this is literally "fireball" by pitbull??? silly stuff aside, i feel like he'd like to let you plan things!! not bc he doesn't want to- he just likes to let you take charge! you two will be deciding on where to go for dinner, and you'll be like "let's go here!" and he'll just be like, "okay :3" no arguing at all, he'll just go along with whatever you say! but he still likes to take care of you! like, he'll do little things like, zipping up your jacket, or holding the car door open for you, or bringing the blankets up to your chin while you're in bed so you don't get cold :((( also, kind of like the random biting thing, i feel like he just likes to hold you. like, you'll be standing at the stove cooking dinner, and he'll come up behind you and hug you TIGHT. like, you can barely breathe, but you know he just loves you so much, so let him squeeze the air out of you <3. taemin is the type of boyfriend that wants to be romantic, but he's just not really sure how! you two have your own way of going about things, and that makes you happy :)

a/n no.2: i went a little overboard with taemin, but i had a lot to say about that funky guy!! if you liked this, a like and reblog would be highly appreciated!! i love u guys. thanks for reading<333

[silverskyeline]

'number one fan'

series (part 1) - rockstar logan meets popstar wade backstage. what could go wrong? (1.1k words) pairing - logan howlett x wade wilson tags - first meeting, rockstar!logan x popstar!wade, enemies to lovers, swearing, logan feels drawn to wade, alcohol mention, kind of cute, wade is his number one fan, band au, wade still wears his deadpool mask, wade uses the name 'deadpool' as a stage name.

.・。.・゜✭・. .・。.・゜✭・. .・。.・゜✭・.

logan had never heard of their support act, but by the name alone he wasn't particularly interested. what kind of a name is 'deadpool' anyway? they probably play some regurgitated heavily sampled pop trash, the same sort of crap they loop on the radio that makes his ears bleed. or maybe metal, but not the good kind.

'deadpool'. . . what a load of shit.

.・。.・゜✭・. .・。.・゜✭・. .・。.・゜✭・.

it's not until logan finds himself backstage that he lands eyes on him, the front runner.

well, it's less that it was a casual encounter, more that wade makes his presence known in the only way he knows how.

"OH. MY. GOD." he squeals, balling his fists and shaking them as he squirms in front of the taller man, "it's you." he's adorned in merch, a shirt with logans face on it, badges on that same shirt, plus some stickers that were very obviously homemade. logan winces at the sight, but his eyes are more preoccupied with that mask he's wearing. red and black. what was he supposed to be, was this a sex thing?

there's silence, but only for a few moments, wade quickly fills it.

"can you sign my boobs?" he tilts his head, trying to meet logans gaze, pointing to his flat chest, "pretty please? i swear i won't sell it on ebay - or, well, i mean i guess there's probably people on ebay looking to buy human skin but-"

"don't do autographs," logan grumbles, thinning his eyes as he shakes his head. he pushes roughly past him, eyes glancing around for the rest of the band. why'd he always get dumped with the crazy fans?

"riiiight, gotta keep the fans at a distance, huh? smart, smaaart. . . i promise i'm not the kind of fangirl to hide in your basement. if i was i wouldn't have just told you that," he rambles on, following closely behind logan like a lost puppy, "the attic though? now that's-"

logan stops, wade walks directly into his toned back, stumbling backwards like a connecting bumper car.

taking a nice, deep, calming breath that does nothing to soothe the storm brewing within him, logan turns to face him once more.

"you know, you're taller than your wiki says. you should really do something about that," wade sighs, hands on his hips "unless you're the one that edited it. anyone can edit it, by the way - wikipedia, total garbage fire. i once had a back-and-forth fight with a mod while i tried to change the 50 states of america to just say: 'canada'. rest assured! i am banned for life."

a beat, and logans eye twitches. "do you ever shut the fuck up?" he asks with a look of sheer confusion on his face, he's not even sure what half of those words that spill from his mask-covered mouth even mean. and though he can't see through the material, he can tell the dumbass in front of him is smiling.

"no, not really," he shrugs nonchalantly, "it's one of my charms, that's what my wiki says. totally truthful. 100% accurate. 101% filled with grammatical errors."

logan groans and shakes his head in disbelief, he mutters something along the lines of 'this fuckin' guy' as he walks towards his dressing room. he had to be a joke, right? there's no way this guy was a serious musician, he could hardly hold a conversation never mind an instrument. who the fuck booked him?

"w-wait, where ya' goin?" wade calls out meekly, waving dramatically like a wife who's waving off her husband at war, "am i seriously not gonna get an autograph?"

slamming the door to his dressing room, logan disappears inside leaving wade to shrink in disappointment.

". . .aw man, wait 'till the mutuals find out i met the logan," he smirks, causing his mask to wrinkle as he searches desperately for his phone in one of his many pockets.

-

logan pays no attention throughout the support act, in fact, he remains holed up in his dressing room nursing a bottle of whisky. it was a pre-show ritual of his, and he wasn't going to give it up now. not even when his mind lingered to the little masked creature who annoyed the fuck out of him despite only being in his presence for a few minutes.

what? why the fuck was he even thinkin' about him?

whatever, logan thought, couldn't let people like that get inside your head. you give them too much room and they take root there like a bad smell, and logan had enough anger issues as is. he did not need this guy to make it worse.

so when he takes to the stage, his mind is firmly clear. well, as clear as it can be. logan often finds his mind to be slightly murky, waves never calm or gentle, a storm he couldn't quite tame. but music alleviated the heaviness of his thoughts, grounded him, finding peace in the melody, in the rough texture of the strings, the harsh beat of the bass that hits you in the chest like a bullet.

his eyes open, settling upon the audience.

until one audience member lets out a particularly loud shriek.

one that sounds all too familiar.

logans eyes immeditely hone in on the same guy from earlier. he's cheering in the front row, louder than everyone else. his body is pressed against the barrier as he waves a crudely written cardboard sign in crayon that says 'marry me logie' with a large red heart at the side.

maybe it's something in his pure enthusiasm, or the balls he must have to not feel an ounce of embarrassment, or maybe the fact that he's almost sort of endearing in a pathetic kind of way. but logan finds himself. . . smiling? no, it's not a full smile. that's rare, reserved for real special occasions. but it's close.

he's always found himself drawn to strays, because they often remind him of himself - lost, looking for a home, looking for somewhere to belong. and in that moment, logan could see something reflected in that stupid fucking weird mask of his - a craving for connection.

fuck.

in that moment, logan knew that this idiot had already taken root in his mind and was trying to make a home there. he couldn't let this happen, he wouldn't let this happen. he was a stranger, a deranged one at that.

no, this was not happening.

logan steals a glance in his direction once more.

except it was.

[michaelsfavgirl]

he takes care of you when you're sick

Pairing: Michael Jackson x fem!reader

Tags: established relationship, fluff, Mike being husband material

Word Count: 500+

Requested: yes/no

Author’s Note: first hcs on this blog lets gooo

Links: navigation | masterlist | taglist

Oh boy, let’s get into it

Michael is very protective of you as it is

But when you’re sick Michael's protective instincts kick into overdrive (affectionately)

Doesn't care whether it's just a common cold or something miniscule

He’s immediately treating you like fragile porcelain

But god forbid If it's a fever or a more serious ailment, he's practically glued to your hip 24/7

Good luck getting any personal space during those times

He fusses over you constantly, asking if you need him to fetch you something, making sure you're comfortable

“Feeling any better, sweet girl?”

“Are you getting cold? Lemme just quickly grab your favorite blanket” 

This man can cook, okay? So expect him to whip up all kinds of soups to make you feel better.

Don't you even dare to disrespect him by opening the fridge and trying to make a meal for yourself

he won't hear of it

“Ah ah, none of that, don’t want my girl strainin herself for no reason” 

“Mike i just want to eat-” 

“shh, i’m here to take care of you, let’s get you back into bed hm? You go take a little nap while I make you something okay baby?” you nod defeatedly and take your ass back to bed 

Is very serious when it comes to taking medicine

Doesn't care if you say it tastes like dookie

You’re taking it, end of conversation

He’ll revoke your kisses and cuddles privileges if you don’t comply

He’s pretty cruel as you can tell 

But he’s so sweet afterwards, showering you with praise and kisses

“That wasn’t so difficult now was it?” He says and kisses your pout away 

Will 100% help you shower if you’re feeling weak 

Even when you're not sick, he enjoys doing domestic things with you; it makes him feel fuzzy and warm inside

Michael refuses to put any distance between you in bed, no matter how much you protest that he'll get sick too

This man looks at you like -_- ‘You think I care bout that?’

He'll wrap you securely in his arms and pull the sheets up to your neck

His huge hands gently caressing your skin and humming a soothing tune

As you start to feel better Michael feels a little guilty and selfish

 Of course he wants his precious angel to be healthy and all, but he really gets used to taking care of you so intimately very quickly and wishes it could go on a little longer

You have to remind him that y’all live together and spend most of your time in each other's presence.

It doesn’t get any closer than that but he’s still pouting like a baby, saying he’ll miss taking care of you

As if he doesn’t already do everything for you and spoil you rotten

This man will be the death of you…and you wouldn’t have it any other way <3

© michaelsfavgirl 2024

Taglist: @theladyinmoscow @yeriminist @yeaiamme2 @helloaugustmoon @cinnamoncunt @theladyofmylife @minekarina @kionaaa @theskinniestjackson-denny @anivkye @graciegizmo3184 @theasexual-jackson @mrsmikaelsxn @fallinlovewithevil @armasbw @b3rk1ey @maybe7tommorow @falllovesomemichealjackson

[erensdurag]

Letting my mom rate MW2 characters Pt1

After my last post I thought why not letting my mom rate MW2 characters because she loves watching me play it and picking what characters I should play with (she always picks Nicki Minaj or Alejandro lmaoo)

Enjoy!🎀

Ghost💀(My Husband)

My Mom: 6/10

Me: Aw why 6?😭

My Mom: His face is always covered plus, he looks scary

Me: But he’s a good man I promise…

My Mom: Yeah, to YOU

Me: Damn💀

Soap🧼

My Mom: 7/10

Me: ooh okay why 7?

My mom: He’s a very gorgeous man but I can just tell he plays too much in serious situations. Remember what happened to him in the Loki series??

Me: omfg you did NOT have to bring that up he didn’t deserve that😭

Alejandro🌹

Me: *shows her the pic of him* rate him fro-

My mom: 10000/10 CUZ THAT MY MF MAN

Me:…..

My mom: That could really be my baby daddy idc😌

Me:😭

Price✨

My Mom: 100/10

Me: Okay that’s not bad

My mom: He’s just so dad or husband material after seeing the way he treats the people on his team…I love him😭🩷

Me: omg me too mom😭

That’s all for today I’ll bother my mom to post pt2 soon!

Tags:

[snailsgoingdowntown]

Ruth x maid! Fem! Reader

Ruth is 30 and reader is 24, 6 year age gap cuz I'm turning 23 this year but I think Ruth is supposed to be in his early to mid thirties so I'm being kinda Self-indulent (I didn't want to make the gap 7 years so... Yeah, upped the age).

Not the actual fic that will come out, just a drabble that I came up with

Warnings: slight self-conscious on Ruth's side

Nsfw warnings: fingering, oral (f receiving)

Minors, ageless blogs that barely have anything, dni or you get blocked.

This blog contains/interacts/creates dark content, dni if you are uncomfortable with that.

No tag list for this cuz I'm on the road + I wrote it down on a sheet of paper I left at home.

--

I think Ruth would absolutely have a low sex drive. He just doesn't look like someone who thinks about it often, much less have the urge. I am 100% sure he's a virgin cuz like, look at him. He doesn't know how to rizz ppl up nor does he want to unless it benefits him (having maxi help with making the magical devices, but that was more peer pressure than actual rizz).

I'm just saying, Ruth would be kinda hopeless with asking out the reader, not because he's cluelese (probably seen Gable and the others pick up chicks, so has a vague idea of what and what not to do + can see how unbalanced maxi's relationship with Riftan is. He literally told him to calm down with his antics once, but thats about it if I remember correctly) but because he's just so... Blunt that it comes off as rude.

Maxi literally thinks that in the webtoon when her maid slams his drink down on the table instead of placing it down gently like she did with maxi's cup.

But anyway, I just imagine Ruth as the type of guy who at first, tries to ignore the developing feelings he has for you, and it works, but it gets harder and harder when you smile at him like that, when you return his playful banter and don't get offended at his tone and choice of words. When you don't overstep his boundaries, attempt to get to know him, his likes and dislikes, interests, how you want to learn about magic and you listen to his lectures, hell sometimes he even invites you to sit along with maxi as he goes about teaching her (only if the lady of the castle is comfortable, of course, which she will be after a while cuz I said so).

The way your face lights up in awe and wonder whenever he performs a spell or summons fire from the tip of his fingertips. The very eyes that tend to glance at his lips, and he pretends he doesn't notice. Your hands that are a bit rough from washing clothes, helping in the kitchen, cold water stinging and numbing them when you scrub the castle floors, are the very hands he wants to hold, and sometimes late at night, he imagines them pulling and tugging at his hair as you lean against 'his' table or even the library wall, and fuck if he actually had enough room to use in his tower, he would, his mouth latched onto your clit and fingers pumping in and out of your sloppy cunt -

It's not very often he gets thoughts like that, but when he does, he gets harder than riftan gets with the knights and their training.

He doesn't comment on your efforts to keep the library tidy, organizing his books and research papers to where the place looks presentable, at least. But he shows his appreciation through small favors in return - helps you with the cleaning if times allows for it, showing you flashy yet small spells that don't affect the area or people around (riftan would quite literally kill him if they did), gulping down his embarrassment as he massages your shoulders, ignoring the way you were just a bit too squimish, or how flustered you would get but accept his offer regardless.

It's not even a sexual thing, it just makes him want to wrap his arms around you, take in your scent, confess and just enjoy a simple life with you -

It's not really possible. He's just incapable of showing clear romantic intentions and affections. He's not husband material and he doesn't want kids, and he's very iffy about weddings and marriage in general when it concerns him. Besides, he's older than you, and while age gaps are common, he thinks it'd be better if you were to settle down with someone your own age. Because someone your own age would understand you better, give you children, marry you without worry.

You deserve a loving, caring husband, one who would hug and kiss you, make love to you, respects you, who isn't afraid or uncomfortable with physical affection, and doesn't have a rather bad reputation around the castle because of his personality.

So, when your hands clutch at his shirt, tilting your chin up, mouth pressing against his, he should stop you. He should stop instead of loosely wrapping one arm around your waist, bringing you closer, moving his mouth against yours. He should stop instead of clumsily bumping teeth with you, humming in content as you sigh into the kiss.

He should stop instead of going in for another kiss once you part, finally understanding what makes riftan so crazy about physical affection.

He should stop, but he doesn't.

He can't nor does he want to.

[tuxebo]

sometimes i want to get back to writing long fics, but then i remember i have mouths to feed (yes, you). anyways, i was talking about the viktors in my last post's tags and i wanted to elaborate on that.

okay, when i say rookwood is husband material, i never said he was good husband material. while the reason you relationship would work is because of small moments that are really sweet. you may think he's changed, but he'll act like it never happened right afterwards.

the way you meet is probably the most tragic part of it all and sets the tone of the rest of your abusive relationship. so, you happened to be a halfbreed (wizard x smth, most likely veela or siren) that he planned on selling but decided to keep for himself. alternatively, you could have been trying to protect some animals from poachers but he still took the animal and you. he's a greedy scoundrel.

he won't hurt you, per se, but he will trophy wife the life out of you. personally i wouldn't mind that, but i could see why many people would. this isn't your average trophy wife, this is something else. he brings you everywhere in a "buy animals or materials from me and you might bag yourself a beauty like this one" kinda way. at the same time, you would not be the beauty the customers bag because your his, gout a brand and all. mhm, he 100% puts his name on you somewhere.

now, you may be confused. that isn't husband like at all, and i agree. we need to look into the finer details here, my dears. in letters, on the rare occasion he doesn't bring you along as some marketing ploy, he writes your name like it is that of a saint's. you can see in each pen stroke, it is some of the most gentle movements your lover has ever made. after long days of hard work, yelling at his workers and standing around as they do all the work, he finally has time to think about you as he winds down.

he holds you all the same as well. like a creature he want's to be gentle with but has no clue how, so as a result he just watches from afar. you have your own room and he has his, objectively yours is just nicer, and you have people waiting on your every need and want. he won't bother you or talk to you the longer you are together, aside from times you'd bump into each other in his manor or stand face to face with only a bookshelf between you.

someone very similar is another viktor, viktor krum. now he is not abusive unlike someone we know, he's definitely a watcher as well. he shows his care and love with his eyes, and sure there's more as well.

now not entirely unlike rookwood, he will drown you in expensive things. look at him, he's been a professional quidditch player since before he even became an adult, he's a wealthy guy; by ethical means, i might add. he doesn't only lavish you in clothes or jewelry, but whatever hobby or career it is you have. you like astronomy? have a planetarium! you're a writer? have the entire library from beauty and the beast. your wish is his command.

which brings me to, he is so princess bride coded. if you take nothing from this post at all, take this one thing. he has a similar phrase to "as you wish" that he says whenever you tell him something, while it may seem like a "whatever, i'll just do what you say to get it over with" response, he actually means to say "i love you" each time he says it. it is rare that he goes out of his way to speak, even rarer that he outright says he loves you, but in his eyes and actions you know he means it.

krum is actually very smart loves, think about it. if you want to go on about a certain topic, he'll keep up just fine. for starter's, he's read the books he's seen you read in case you want to talk about it, also he's just a naturally intelligent guy. it's how he could keep up his grades and quidditch, a lot of things he just knows.

pause, he does that thing where he'd very, very gently bounce his leg while you're sitting on his lap and telling him something. vodka in one hand and a look in his eyes that one would have when look at their entire world. oh my, hand placement on the waist too, not even in that kind of way but he's just o perfect.

[windsweptinred]

10 Characters/10 Fandoms /10 Tags

Thank you for the tag @two-hands-toward-the-sun, this took me on a deep delve of my fandom past! Time to roll out my gaggle of glorious bastards again...

1. Ken Ichijouji - Digimon 02

Babies first blorbo. Puppy kicking, whip weilding antagonist who giveth not a shiteth. With a soul as black as his gloriously groomed locks. Who, by the power of love is transformed into the soggiest little puddle of twink you ever did see. Tragic backstory ✔️ A smorgasbord of issues ✔️ A realtionship with their rival/best friend so obbsessive, you're going to have a harder time proving this ship isn't a thing than it is. ✔️ Ken Ichijouji came with everything a young, naive millennial needed to make their first glorious steps into the world of fandom.

2. Ryou Bakura/Yami Bakura/Theif King Bakura - (Same body, they count as one!) Yu-Gi-Oh

Ryou Bakura - Adorable British cupcake with the soul of a traumatised lovecraftian cultist. Staring into the abyss while having afternoon tea. Gothic horror in a cream knit.

Yami Bakura - Actual murder floof, the walking personification of a horror podcast. In his wake trails body gore, supernatural mystery and gay subtext. Part demon, part Egyptian theif, 100% bringing sexy back. (bonus points: Florence)

Thief King Bakura - Traumatic back story maketh homicidal rogue. Wears red, has a social circle made up of ghosts and snake monsters... Is this not prime husband material?

3. Starscream - Transformers

Darling little duplicitous second in command of the Decepticons. Not just any 'Little Shit', THE 'Little Shit'. Simulatiously the dumbest and cleverest bot in any room. And that, my friends, takes a particular breed of talent. Negative traits, scheming, petty, fabulous. Postive traits, scheming, petty, fabulous. Repetitive attempts to off Megatron, play of either the power or fore variety. Not sure which, could be both.

4. Darth Maul/ General Armitage Hux- Star Wars

I will not and cannot choose a favourite between them. Instead, watch with wonder and awe as I neatly compress them into the same blurb...

Sad meow meow with self-worth issues does galactic war crimes to prove 'daddy' wrong. What do you mean my fixation with thwarting my archnemeis can't be classed as a hobby/career goal/life ambition? My voice can launch a thousand ships... Different circumstances, same truth. Such a pathetic little sausage, you'll want to sit them down and feed them soup. But they know atleast 101 ways to kill you with the spoon... So best not risk it.

5. Crowley - Supernatural

The diabolical king of cunt serving. Me and my athletic calves are doing this right thing for all wrong reasons...And you can't prove other wise! Alignment: Risk it for a biscuit. Four step program to deal with all life's problems: 1: flirt at it, 2: shout at it, 3: throw (please pick your chosen Winchester or, if pushed, tailor) at it. 4:... Yell bollocks and follow with a whiskey chaser.

6. Desire/Destiny of the Endless - The Sandman

Again, not picking. Desire, my darling little hell kitten. Destiny, my inglorious bastard in brown...

This is my world, you MFs all just live in it!

My emotions... Which I do not have, are the route cause of everyone else's problems.

Ah humanity, the dust bunnies upon which I sneeze.

Even in a glorified bathrobe, I'm still better then you, and you know it.

It is a truth universally acknowledged, that Dream of the Endless is a f*cking dumb ass.

7. Remy Lebeau (Gambit) - Xmen, Marvel Comics

Marvel looked at their collection of motley mutant misfits. And realised they had a morally dubious, disaster bi shaped hole to fill... And there Remy Lebeau has been for for 30 slutty, slutty years and counting. Sex in fushia pink spandex. Single handily keeping thievery in Americas top 50 kinks. Slowly exhausting the world's supply of playing cards... Must be considered a traitor to the cause atleast once a decade to keep his street cred. Must be considered a secret Summers brother atleast once a decade to keep his ego in check.

8. Jonathan Crane (Scarecrow) - Batman (DC)

Scythe wielding, reigning and defending Trick or treat world champion since 1941. The physical attributes of a Giacometti sculpture with the rustic aesthetic of the folk horror genre. Grumpy old man syndrome dialed up to eleven. Pets: Craw the crow, Nightmare the raven... Edward Nygma. Built a life manifesto based on a gothic novel... Oh captain, my captain.

9. Alfie Solomons - Peaky Blinders

All hail the great arisen god of Margate. Who looked upon Tommy Shelby and called him smol. Weilds tomfuckery like a pepper spray straight up the jacksie. Views betrayal as a bonding exercise. Somewhere in his words are the the meaning of life. Still awaiting the lab results as to whether this man is the anthropomorphic personification of chaotic neutral. Not even part of the egg and spoon race. Will still manage to win with a watermelon and a novelty spork.

10. Elias Bouchard - The Magnus Archives

(art by @felix-krain and @caligosatchel)

Cluedo character brought to life by malevolent eldritch entity for sexy end of the world shinnanigans. I suspect either Proffesor Plum or Reverend Green, professional opinions vary. Maintains the inability to move more than one square at a time when enacting nefarious schemes. Still has a preference for homicide by kitchenware. Comes with all the British, arch dilf energy of an Agatha Cristie villain. Taking the horrors from the hands of privileged elite and unleashing them on unsuspecting white collar workers. Eye, chin and tits first.

Whelp, that's my ten fictional characters/fandoms. Men folk (and Desire) addition. When I say I like them on the morally grey dulux colour chart. I'm not exaggerating. 😅

I'm tagging, at your pleasure @mashumaru @aisalynn @bobbole @tickldpnk8 @writing-for-life @marvagon @missingrache @rriavian @jazzy-a and @ibrithir-was-here

[weaselgirl]

A Matter Of Chance (14537 words) by Weaselgirl1988 Chapters: 3/12 Fandom: Dungeons and Daddies (Podcast) Rating: Explicit Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Nick Close | Nicholas Foster/Lark Oak Characters: Nick Close | Nicholas Foster, Lark Oak, Glenn Close (Dungeons and Daddies), Taylor Swift (Dungeons and Daddies), Sparrow Oak Additional Tags: Name a character they are probably here somewhere, Marriage of Convenience, Fake Marriage, AU No forgotten realms, canon typical generational trauma, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Eventual Smut, ex friends to husbands to lovers, Slow Burn, Nick has no idea what is going on, But this is not new for him Summary: “So what you have told me is you live alone in a rented studio, with no permanent income, no social support network and that you were out of Taylor’s life for nearly 3 years while you were ‘finding yourself’. You have never paid child support even though he lives with his mother, who is in permanent work with a long term partner in a home she owns outright. We haven’t even looked at any criminal history or drug use- I know it’s legal now, but have you ever done it around Taylor? That’s what I thought. If I was a family lawyer- and I definitely am not- I would want to be paid upfront, because this would be over very quickly.”   Nick's life was not going exactly to plan, despite his "best" efforts. When his ex-wife Cassandra gets in to a new relationship, she throws another spanner in to works already pretty full of spanners. Out of other ideas and other options, Nick is forced to consider an offer from some old friends he would rather not have spoken to at all. In order to maintain his family, he's going to have to move past some old grudges and let some people in.

I do not usually promote my fics on here, because people that want them will find them. But I have put so much work in to this one, that I am putting my big girl knickers on and sharing it.

I am up to chapter 8 in terms of ready to go material, so it will be finished! Marriage of convenience that will 100% have my usual smut level in by the end. Lots of backstory and character stuff too, I promise!!

God I hope at least one of you likes it

[walkinginland]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

very kindly tagged by @freneticfloetry and @three-drink-amy. thanks, friends!!!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

20! Three of those are drabble compilations, how I keep my 100-word drabbles organized for different fandoms, but I'm counting them 😂

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

35,104. I don't know how to write long lmao.

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Most of my fics (15 of them to be exact, as well as the main longer fic I'm writing atm) are for Outlander, but I've written for a total of 5 fandoms, and hop between them at different times. In addition to Outlander, I have fics/drabbles for The Song of Achilles, The Last Binding Trilogy, 911, and 911: Lone Star.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

To Heart and Home (Outlander, multichap, canon divergent) - by farrrrr, which makes sense, as it's my only multichap

Foundations (Outlander, one shot, canon compliant)

return my fists to fingers (The Last Binding, one shot, canon compliant)(i need more of yall to read these books and write fic for them. i need it)

Sunlight (The Song of Achilles, one shot, canon compliant)

Grievances Raised (Outlander, one shot, modern au)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I do! I don't post often enough that I get an overwhelming amount of comments or anything, so it's not a huge burden to reply to them all. I just am continually baffled by people reading what I write, it genuinely blows my mind.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

hmmmmmm. a lot of what I write is pretty angsty, but I love finding and weaving out the thread of hope that lives in those broken places. That said, does heaven have enough angels yet is pretty rough. It's a canon compliant little snippet from the pov of a stillborn infant so like...... she's sad. there's still hope tho! always still hope.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

ooo probably the fluffiest happy fic I have is All the Colors in the Rainbow! It ends with all the Frasers going off to Pride, and it makes me hella happy.

The happiest fic story-wise is probably To Heart and Home, just because it fixes The Main Fuckening that happens in Outlander and brings that family back together earlier.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

*knocks on wood* i haven't yet!

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I don't, I'm not brave enough. The closest I came to it was with Grievances Raised, wherein Claire pegs the brains out of her husband, but I only wrote the aftermath.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

I haven't done one yet!

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of 🤞🏻

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

I don't think so? I feel like I remember someone asking me to translate To Heart and Home a few years ago, but I don't know if anything ever came of it.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I haven't! I feel like I would be the worst co-writer lol, I am farrrr too slow.

14. What’s your all-time favorite ship?

to write? idk, probably Jamie and Claire? I just feel like I know them, inside and out. I don't have to look for their voices, they're right there.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

oh god, so many outlander ones lmao.

16. What are your writing strengths?

I am really good at matching the tone of the source material! Once I get the voice of the characters/narration/general story style, I feel like I can reproduce the general vibes of canon. I think that's why I sometimes have an easier time with writing fic from stories in the form of books - there's a written tone I can internalize. And consequently, why I've had a harder time with nailing a voice for 911 or Lone Star, even though I do want to eventually write fic for those shows.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

Dialogue and plot! I write Vibes™, but I don't know how to write actual Stories. I would love to be that writer who could crank out a whole story with a plot and shit, because I love that type of fic with my whole self, but my brain just functions in vibes.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

I am a Coward about it. I've written a fair amount of Gàidhlig into my Outlander fics, especially in To Heart and Home, and honestly I think I've done a pretty good job with it. I spent a lot of time researching the language, up to and including researching grammar structures and taking duolingo lessons at the beginning of the pandemic for a few months. I've forgotten most of it now though, despite duolingo being extremely persistent with its reminders lmao.

However.

If I were to write for 911 and Lone Star like I would like to, I would like to include some Spanish into those stories (especially with Lone Star), and I just don't think I would do it justice. I failed Spanish miserably in high school, and haven't taken a stab at it since. If I include it I want to do it well and respectfully, ya know? I'm bilingual (just not with Spanish lol) and an interpreter, and I think that has brought with it a better understanding of just how complicated language is, and how easy it is to fuck it up when you don't know what you're doing. And as a very white person, I also don't want to act like I know fuck-all about a non-white language and culture when I don't.

Sooooo, I'm a coward about it atm. Hoping to get better eventually though!

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Outlander! Never ever thought I would write fic, didn't think I was "allowed." Hadn't ever written anything creatively before (in english at least), so it was a big jump for me. this makes it sound like english is my second language, when really it's just that the first time that anyone made me write creatively was in my deaf lit class

20. Favorite fic you’ve written?

Oh god this changes all the time. At the moment I've feeling very tender towards into the empty parts of me. It's a really tragic part of canon, but just gorgeous character potential. I loved how gentle this turned out, how John and Claire had a moment of healing in the middle of their tragedy.

But also I think that the fic I'm writing right now is gonna turn out to be my favorite ❤ once I get the writing juices flowing again for one last section 🤞🏻

I'm not sure who all has done this already, but no pressure tagging @liminalmemories21, @flyinghome-againstthewind, @theawkwardterrier, @homerforsure, @paperstorm

[andy-clutterbuck]

Ricky Dicky Doo Dah Grimes™

[evenaturtleduck]

I posted 5,321 times in 2022

That's 2,888 more posts than 2021!

280 posts created (5%)

5,041 posts reblogged (95%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@ladylowkeyed

@stellophia

@everylokitten

@ace-din-djarin

@mykingdomforasong

I tagged 3,976 of my posts in 2022

Only 25% of my posts had no tags

#atla - 566 posts

#favorite books - 274 posts

#loki - 236 posts

#art - 214 posts

#the mandalorian - 212 posts

#star wars - 189 posts

#lotr - 172 posts

#zuko - 147 posts

#zukka - 129 posts

#loki and thor - 100 posts

Longest Tag: 135 characters

#if the person who writes my favorite stories says that these are *their* favorite stories then they're probably going to be mine too ❤️

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Azula according to Oldest Child

43 notes - Posted March 6, 2022

#4

Cracking open a new fandom on AO3, and maybe it's just that I've been up and down the stairs a bunch of times this morning, but I've discovered I can't take any canon-compliant Yuri on Ice fics seriously unless Viktor has fucked-up knees. In related news, thank god for adults who write fanfic.

61 notes - Posted October 17, 2022

#3

Finished Husband Material , loved it. Actually probably enjoyed it even more than the first one, because my favorite love stories are the ones that are less about whether or not the relationship will succeed and more about, now that the relationship exists, what does it look like and what does that mean for these characters? I really enjoy watching messy people doing their best to work through conflicts with empathy and patience.

67 notes - Posted August 8, 2022

#2

Azula as Joan of Arc - by Oldest Child

78 notes - Posted October 24, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

My favorite slow burn, novelist-and-the-amateur-detective-who's-crushing-hard-on-her to lovers, multi-novel relationship ever. And in the meantime, while they sort out their baggage, their weird friendship remains an absolute delight.

426 notes - Posted September 14, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[roseband]

im losing my mind at far right and far left comments saying "automated tee shirt factories" or "ill just learn how to sew"

fuck you all don't know where your clothing comes from and you're all so consumer-pilled, shopping-maxxed to even look it up???

any people who go into debt for the prices that are gonna raise, deserve what's gonna happen to them.

"ill just learn how to sew" is my fave. cause nearly all my designer clothing that isn't samples, is out of goodwill/goodwill bins cause people don't know how to do minimal basic repairs or to bring their fucking shoes to a cobbler anymore lol. i should not be getting an alice/olivia top that retails for $300 for $10 cause it's only missing 5 beads.......fix your fucking stuff? my great grandma taught my grandma, who taught my mom, who taught me how to sew as soon as i could hold a needle.

also.....a significant amount of fabric mills are in fujian. do you think there's magical crude oil processing plants in the usa making your polyester and rayon plastic threads. your cheap clothing is practically ALL made of plastic???? even guterman, famous german polyester thread brand, has moved the bulk of their processing to china for their non eco friendly specialty line.

your raw materials to sew from will be tariffed..... we don't have girls getting scalped by machinery in lowell anymore here.

"we'll retrofit factories here".... the current top of the line automated direct to garment printer is the m&r polaris. (starts at 800k and can print 10 shirts at once, but you still have to place the shirts on the initial plates). other printers in factories ive been in require shirts to be moved from screen print plates for each single color. which is labor.....to be paid at american wages. this is printed in usa, but blanks are from overseas "made in america of imported materials" babes and we STILL hit capacity at our normal factories during our main quick turn events and have to source additional factories at work.

"automated apparel"..... mostly apparel managerial roles are in the states. mostly east coast as the industry shifted from all production to mainly design/managerial cause like lowell, ma...nyc....new jersey "the embroidery capitol of the world", the south with the horrors of the cotton industry. we're not the ones who are gonna be bonked

"new york fashion week needs to suffer" is a hot take from the left i saw.......it's here cause the apparel management, design, and sales roles are here, do you think the /products/ are for new york? what i present during our internal nyfw calls is sold in EMEA, AUS, UK, USA ffs. i work on stuff produced globally?

there is no luxury automated apparel industry. there's automated cutting machines that can cut 100s of bodies at once, but the stacks have irregularities and have to be sewn......by hand. even with industrial sewing machines/sergers there's a human shoving that fabric thru the machine and sewing nearly every seam.

20% of the labor force in american domestic apparel manufacturing is undocumented immigrants.

when there's production in el salvador, bangladesh, and china we all have people in our companies who's role is "go to factory, make sure there's no slaves"..... my husbands next promotion is the "go to china make sure there's no slaves at the fujian factories and mills" role cause he chinese and speaks fuzhounese...

this is what the reality of your $30-40 shirts IS. you're not gonna get $20 shirts with royalty art made in USA. it's too much labor.

and with luxury apparel it's STILL chinese slaves. in italy and france they've both done raids of the designer brands production houses and found literal indentured servitude. undocumented chinese immigrants making 1-3 euros an hour. that "made in italy" tag is a lie, when it's made from illegally imported chinese labor at chinese slave wages.

people love to say there's "nothing in thrift stores" in some demented social justice type language about "plus size" or "leave clothing for poor people" but 75% of what goes to the floor in thrift stores goes to landfill. this is after it hits the thrift store outlets (the $2.50/lb bins)

it's so frustrating to see this crap tbh. "ill learn how to sew immediately" should we have a party, should we invite anna wintour?

[jakeandhaas-blog]

Check out this listing I just added to my Poshmark closet: NWOT SLVRLAKE Revolve Jeans Sz 28 Hero Slim Straight Pacific Wash 100% Cotton.

[theorist-influencer-untitled]

7.19.24 Friday

7:17 am

Still,have windblow...

Garbage collector is here and I threw all the trash ... Confirmed our old washing machine for 10 years is really on E3 ( error 3 )... It is beyond my knowledge to handle it... I changed the light bulb of Neko, good thing I have 1 left here for her...

Uncle Jun's behaviour seems mysterious but already went out... He is helping on food but on other things nah! Still,cheapness angels...

Still,thinking of money and Lazadah is already calling me to pay my creditz... I need to process my BPI but still looking for money to do that... It is for Teleperformance Molino Disney account.

I did stream last night before 12 midnight until Cinderealla is dead,angels ( even after midnight or passed midnight ).

8:19 am

Still,have windblow...

Nourishing nana's mind before doing something but still thinking of money and my job and my progress,angels...

8:25 am

We played twice, pares2x or pairing cards by two's.

I won on the first round, on our 2nd round weird!

My last card is A of hearts and nana's last card is 7of diamonds... How did it happen? Is there a magic spell Garret? Ash? My cousin-white???

Goosebumps...

11:37 am

Still,have windblow...

Biological mother thank God! She went here to get the curtains and blankets for the "master bedroom"...

I just cleaned the side part of receiving area, the best that I can do coz we have no stock room here. We are somehow over-loaded of still an important stuff to keep here...

Sir DD? Sir DD again??? My biological mother told me that Uncle DD is demanding on cleaning and I'm doing it coz I'm mature and I know Uncle DD is on his strategy to ask money on Aunt Teresa...I still need some "talent fee" here... Hmm... Why, will Uncle DD will ask money from Aunt Teresa??? I thought they are working...

I can't do anything to hide this side part coz we have no stock room...But 100% I removed the dirt or dust...Those are stuff of John & Neko and some cleaning materials... Few stuff of Uncle Jun.

7:34 pm

Still,have windblow...

Done,eating dinner with the rest of the gang here... Done,brushing John's teeth as well.

Biological mother went back here around 6pm with Allen ( husband of Maco ). Thank God for their kindness... They brought back the curtains and blankets. Some are dried already and most of it I still hanged there at the hanging rope to fullt dry it...

Uncle DD needs to fix tha ac and bring some sacks... I just hate him for being demanding and threathening us here as if a "super Sir DD". He is the Jesus or Judas he is the one should manage to fix the other ac...

Me? I'm looking forward for the "talent fee".. I need to go back working and I have to exercise again... I just stopped for few days to totally clear the house here, removing dust and dirt in the living room and in the "master bedroom". Still, I need to process something for my job in Disney account. My dream and frustration to visit or work in an actual Disney in USA or Canada???

Uncle Jun should cut the grass tomorrow... It is not my ideal life here to be simply flatten this way... I can't get a bf that I want like my cousin-white or Garret or Ash...

It is bitterish for me that my first cousin on Aunt Ten2x on my biological father side is already married...

Garret and Ash are all successful artist to be considered...

I'm always left behind and I have so many complexeties and frustrations... I really do feel "self-pity" for 17 years... I wanna buy Starbucks everyday... I wanna progress on my vanities. I wanna travel... I haven't tried travelling and be happy... My 17 years were stolen just for nothing... I feel self-pity!

They just want to see me fat and ugly and nothing. This is for the guilty people???

Thanks Ely for the back-up... It is already 5k pesoses today since month of March.

I will do live in Tagged later angels... I hope guilty people can drop by in my space in Tagged.

9:26 pm

Still,have windblow...

Done,watching "Cinderella in the Caribbean"...

[svnflowermoon]

“ WE'RE COLLATORAL HERE, MAN WE GOT HIT . . . ”

i hope you enjoy your time here <33

anon list || pronouns page || pinterest || spotify

➵ you can call me lucy or luce and any other nicknames that fit, also i adore petnames

basic info. ➵  they/she, 17, lesbian (also somewhere on the aroace spectrum idk babe I'm confused), certified romantic advice-giver, enfp, gemini, nz, i adore dogs, plant mum, i love painting, pesto lover, writing is my life, i love going on walks and picnics, I'm 100% a spring girlie, i can't live without music, spotify is the loml, pinterest whore, i hate coffee (sorry), avid lover of platonic love, i overshare on the internet, slytherin, i don't ship real people but idc if you do as long as you're respectful about it, i love character design!!! i've been told by my best friends that i'm a real life nick nelson & remus lupin (also a wet cat but let's just ignore that ahahaha <3 i am insanely obsessed with halley's comet by billie eilish and i literally have a tag for it that's how much i adore it (#THE SONG OF ALL TIME) i often disappear from tumblr for a while due to my mental health <3 free palestine!!!

music. ➵  billie eilish, conan gray, maisie peters, gracie abrams, chappell roan, FINNEAS, holly humberstone, lyn lapid, sabrina carpenter, olivia rodrigo, ABBA, arctic monkeys, fletcher, queen, claire rosinkranz, girl in red, phoebe bridgers, boygenius, renee rapp, troye sivan, lauv, harry styles, niall horan, lizzy mcalpine, griffy, johnny orlando, ricky montgomery, zayn, maggie lindemann, louis tomlinson, beabadoobee, ella jane, cigarettes after sex, emei, tate mcrae, lana del rey, melanie martinez, 5sos, the neighbourhood, chase atlantic, clairo, hozier, paramore, and more

books. ➵ osemanverse, hunger games, anne of green gables, the seven husbands of evelyn hugo, a good girls guide to murder trilogy, the other side of the sky, his dark materials trilogy, red white and royal blue, i kissed shara wheeler, marauders era (not the actual series just the marauders. also anti jkr ew fuck that bitch), six of crows, shadow and bone and more

movies + tv shows. ➵  spiderverse movies, marvel, stranger things, heartstopper, young royals, red white and royal blue, first kill, anne with an e, hunger games, gilmore girls, i am not okay with this, my policeman, shadow and bone, she-ra, httyd, and more

characters. ➵ natasha romanoff, wanda maximoff, james potter, kate bishop, loki, katniss everdeen, max mayfield, robin buckley, tara jones, tori spring, alex claremont-diaz, jimmy kaga-ricci, georgia warr, evelyn hugo, remus lupin, sirius black, regulus black, lorelai gilmore, remus lupin, sirius black, elle argent, tao zu, beth harmon, finnick odair, jesper fahey

art. ➵ i love art but posting it is terrifying. i've just started doing digital art last year but my stupid ass drawing tablet broke so uh yayyy no more of that for the time being. i mainly paint but I'm doing printmaking at school so that there's more variation

my blogs. ➵ 

alt acc: @goldwingangell

writing: @svnflower-writes + my ao3 is sunflowerrmoon

mediocre poetry: @lostmypagewhenyoukissedme

aesthetics: my moodboards @partyfavorr

billie eilish icons: @eilishicons

note. ➵ i would love to be friends with you, please do not hesitate to message me/send me an ask (preferably an ask im an awkward mess in dms) i literally cannot shut up so if you talk to me abt anything i love i will enthusiastically respond (often in all caps) <3 my discord is the same @ i use here and if we're close you can ask for my insta <33 if you know me irl please stop looking at my blog. there's a 96% chance i don't want you looking at this blog, please don't take it personally <33 also, i'm sorta selective abt who i follow back and i rarely follow people back who don't have an intro post or a bio with an age bracket, name, and pronouns.

➵ thank you for reading my intro post <3

“. . . HOPE YOU FIND SOMEWHERE SAFE FOR YOUR BAGGAGE .ᐟ ”