#lmao i died writing that third text

[jacksonxellis]

Jackson: my guy! Jackson: can't believe it took you this long to hit me up :( Jackson: my schedule looks free for u Jackson: i'm usually free on weekends though @luckylewis

lucky 📲 jackson.

Lucky: My dude Lucky: We need to kick it soon Lucky: What's your schedy looking like?

[sonotkari]

Tiny Bits Of Love

Kim Minji x Fem Reader

[ Synopsis ]

Your nonchalant looking seatmate was the last person you expected to get answers on what love was. Maybe they were more than sticky memo pads.

Fluff

[ Word Count ]

1.3k

[ a/n ]

Another random idea popped out at midnight + written in a short span of time + w/ rush + without a single thought in mind so heads up! Yes this isn't the one I spoiled heck I don't even know if that's gonna be published lmao Casually dropping this and dissapearing again /ᐠ｡ꞈ｡ᐟ\

To lonely nights craving for love, dis for u bae <3

It is said that first impressions are made in the first three seconds of your interactions. "She looks scary" was yours the moment you laid eyes on your seatmate, Kim Minji. Not like the rest, laughing on whatever topic they were chit-chatting around, she was quietly sitting on her seat looking in front without a thought. She looked so nonchalant and you, who were usually― no, always surrounded by loud lively people, it wasn't helped when you felt unease, glancing at the girl with a straight expression on her face. She almost looks like that one emoji with a straight-lined mouth. And that may be your second impression of her. But as they say "Third time's a charm" or you weren't really sure whether that was the right phrase to imply but still, it felt something like that at your third impression of Minji which changed very differently from the previous ones. You were right all along at the fact that lively people always surrounded you and that thought became stronger at each smack you earned from her laughing her ass out beside you. Minji was far from nonchalant. She laughed at anything and everything whether it was that one crappy joke the History teacher made or those lame dad jokes one of your friends would yell out. Always smacked someone's shoulder while she was bursting out laughing with whatever she found funny. And if we're going straight to the point here, you fell in love with the girl.

You weren't getting at first why you felt so happy and giddy as well when she was, or why seeing her smile looking your way even if it wasn't her intention to make your heart pound like crazy but later on your friend was the one smacking the shit out of you laughing because apparently, you were dense. "Y/n, don't you get it? That's love… You're in love!!" and that was the moment everything sank in. Love. You've already heard that term a million times if not a billion times throughout your life. You've seen the movies, read the books, and been there on the sidelines when your friends fell in love with somebody and needed support. You had a few crushes back then but come to think of it, you just liked them because everybody else did, not knowing how the feelings worked. Nodding and responding with a hum every time the other girls would coo about these boys saying "He's so cool/handsome" every 5 seconds. But now thinking of Minji, it makes your heart pound and wonder why or how she makes you so happy with small things like linking your arms while walking down the hallway or sitting beside each other at classes you had with her. So this is love.

And now that it sank into you what love was, well not maybe entirely but at least you understood what it felt like to be in love, the next thing you know you were pouring it nonstop on Minji. Giving random gifts like cream puffs you bought because it reminded you of her or strawberry lattes which was her favorite drink of all time with a memo note stuck on it with short messages written like "Have a great day" or "I'll see you again later" which you could've just texted to her anyways but there was just something about taking your time to write them. The way Minji would rush at you with a smile while holding those memos thanking you every single time was definitely making you fall for her more. Her smile, her laugh, every single thing she does, you find it all cute adoring her every second, your eyes refusing to tear out from the sight of the girl. Minji's face was the one you'd instantly notice in a crowd, she was the one you'd always find for every short or long period break, and her existence was the only thing you'd look forward to at school. It came to the point where you couldn't hold on to your feelings anymore and firmly placed a letter on Minji's hand on her way home without making eye contact, doing your best to voice out words despite your flustered state. "Read it when you get home. Alone!"

A letter might've been too much, you really didn't know since everything was a first-time experience. But knowing you'd stutter in an instant if you confessed to her face to face and not being able to tell her your feelings because of it, you'd rather write it all and be thought of as cheesy or whatever than regret not being able to tell her properly. All your worries were washed away when you saw her the next morning with a beaming smile on her face, telling you straightforwardly: "I like you too"

That was exactly 4 years ago and now, you were organizing things, deciding which item goes to which box since you and Minji were moving to a different apartment soon. Even if it was hard to throw away, you had to get rid of things that you won't need for the future because securing space was a very big deal when it comes to apartments. So there you were looking through every stuff making sure you wouldn't take anything unscary with you, until you came across a small box. You don't remember seeing it before so it was probably Minji's. "Love is this yours?" Looking back at her putting some of her stuff inside boxes, Minji turned your way as she slightly lifted her black-framed glasses. "Oh yeah, that's mine…!" Half surprised, half excited, she quickly went your way and sat beside you carefully taking the box from your hands as if it was the most venerable thing. "I almost forgot about this" "What is it??" Curiously shifting your gaze from the box to Minji, she flashed a smile before slowly opening the box. Not noticing what it was at first but then, you out a loud gasp as you took a thing out of the box, examining it with a surprised expression. "You still had this!?" You say as you look at the yellow sticky pad with the memo "Have a great day" written in bad handwriting.

There were a couple more inside the box and looking at them one by one reminded you of the days back then. "You kept it…? But they're just memo pads…" "No…" Minji softly murmurs, looking down with a glimpse of affection at the memo pads you were holding. "They're more than memo pads. They're reminders of how much you cared and thought for me back then, before you gave this to me" She pulls out a familiar small brown envelope. "Oh my god, Minji!?" You excitedly squealed as that envelope was the love letter you shoved her in a rush 4 years ago. Scooting over and sitting between Minji's legs as she wrapped her arms around you getting comfortable, you re-read the whole letter with grunts and nose scrunching in cringe along the way. "God, this is so embarrassing…" Minji outs a soft laugh while she rests her chin on your shoulder, probably also re-reading your confession to her, feeling the nostalgia and rewinding all the memories at the back of her head.

Looking back at the box and what it contained inside, your eyes grow bigger every second seeing that Minji kept all the trinkets, bracelets you made her to match, receipts from when you both went out shopping all day, weird-shaped key chains you used to find cute back then, little notes you'd pass at each other during class while the teacher wasn't paying attention. "Literally everything…?" Feeling your girlfriend's embrace tighten on you and her face buried probably because she got a bit embarrassed that you found her little treasure box, you felt the overwhelming sensation of affection wash all over your chest as you smiled looking back and trying to face Minji who would look anywhere but your eyes. "Of course, I kept everything" She finally murmured with a sheepish smile. "Every single thing represents the tiny bits of love we have for each other"

Minji fixes her black-framed glasses again before looking at you full of adoration in her eyes.

"That's how I have you in my arms right now, yeah?"

creating a memory box is one of the best things

[bonefall]

Ask Etiquette

HELLO sorry for the intimidating post lmao, I just need something to toss up on the masterpost because I feel bad deleting asks and then people will never really have an idea of why I never answered them

I get a ton of asks (usually anywhere from 10 - 20 a day!) and I'm not able to get to them all! I try to answer as many as possible but I'm still just one guy. So with that in mind, there are some sorts of asks I will simply not answer, and some 'requests' I have for people who send them in;

Please keep your asks short PLEASE try not to send me essays if you want a response; I still love reading them! But if you send me walls of text/analysis you are asking me to write a lot in response, which I'd rather spend on actually writing or designing cats. (On that note if you send a bunch of questions at once, the likelihood I respond goes down.)

Do not send me personal questions Listen... I'm a stranger on the internet. I'm overjoyed to see when my art connects with people and helps you realize things! But don't ask me sensitive questions like how to move out of your abusive parents' house!! PLEASE learn internet safety and get less comfortable with volunteering that kind of information to people you don't know!

Do not ask me personal questions you do not need to know what i study or where i work. get less comfortable asking these sorts of questions to queer people on the internet, especially when they talk openly about having previously been abused or stalked. (not that a person should even need to be as open about that as i am)

If I don't have a good response I won't answer Especially for suggestions I don't vibe with. I try to only say "No" if I have a particularly interesting "No" to talk about, if that makes sense! If I had to write a full explanation for every veto or idea I don't vibe with, this blog would be 90% what isn't in BB.

No AUs within the AU. "What if Hawkfrost survived his impalement? What if Firestar never joined? What if Tigerstar was never born?" Listen, buddy, you're creating an exponential distraction for possible ways the story could have gone and I'm not looking to write several essays for the literal hundreds of alternative ways Clan history could have been written. It takes you 5 words to ask "What if X never died" but it takes me paragraphs to answer. (This isn't about suggestions btw, I very specifically mean ppl asking hypotheticals for fun.)

Don't be rude. I feel like this should go without saying but please mind the parasocial gap. Especially if you're on anon, I don't know you, your backstory, or your cadence.

No "Fight Baiting" You're free to ask me to speak about fandom trends, or for my opinions on general ideas, character discussions, and popular arguments! But it crosses a line if you're linking someone's posts with their uncropped usernames, sharing unsolicited google docs, youtube videos, etc, with the intention of getting me to attack a third party. We can talk about ideas without making it a PVP battle.

And, lastly, CLANMEW ASKS!!

I make a hard effort to get to everyone!! Those are published on Clanmew Day (WHICH IS NOW JUST GOING TO BE THE 30TH OF EVERY MONTH SO THAT IT'S LESS CONFUSING) but PLEASE understand I get a ton of them.

As I write this I have more than 26 tabs open of unanswered Clanmew asks, a lot more in my inbox, and 9 already in the queue. So that you understand the sheer volume of asks I have there.

If I didn't get to you that month, chances are that I'll get to you on the next, but please understand why I ask for folks to not re-send asks

So here's Clanmew-specific requests;

PLEASE just try a translation on your own first! Don't just send me raw lists of OCs to translate, give it a go first using the Lexicon, just so I can see you tried. I will happily and gladly make more specific words for you when I see you try!

When you send OCs you've translated, ask me for a new word at the end if you didn't already in your list. Just in case I can't think of a witty comment or a word suggestion, you will help me a lot

Please try to format with lists like this one Folks will send me double or triple-indented lists and it will take up my entire screen when they've only sent like, 5 names. Remember that posts you send to me go on people's dashes, be considerate please You can open a list like this by starting a new paragraph, typing -, and then an immediate space. Hold Shift + Enter to indent without adding another bullet.

If you could put "Clanmew" somewhere in your ask, like even if you open up with "Clanmew: Here is my question blah blah," it would help immensely I physically can't get to every ask I receive on Clanmew Day, so if you have "Clanmew" in your ask somewhere, it makes it a lot easier for me to find it when I can finally answer! I really wish Tumblr had ways to sort asks, but currently, I've just gotta make due with Cntrl + F.

[cowardlybean]

Hey. The Times They Are A Changin’ by @bandtrees and @tigsbitties amiright (muffled face down on the floor)

more (some unsettling things) beneath the cut :3

(Image 3 is my favorite sequence from an animation for TTTAAAC I’ve been working on, so here it is just in case I never finish </3, image 4 is me thinking about Mob’s house. If. That makes sense.)

OH MAN. OH MAN OH MAN. this fic has altered my brain chemistry in a way that has doctors baffled and leaves tragedy in its wake!!!!!!!!! Absolutely a masterpiece I’ve reread it 3 times now and every time I notice a new detail, there’s just SO MUCH CARE put into it. I think I could write an essay about every page of this fic LMAO it honestly blows me away, huge kudos to everyone who was a part of the project!!!!

Especially the multimedia aspects, they were so much fun to find and in some cases decode (Scared the SHIT outta myself with Breathe I think it’s one of my favorites). the youtube videos were so cool as well

Realizing a third of the way in that things will never get better was such a gut wrenching experience, and by the time I realized just how deep the hole Mob dug himself into was it was absolutely too late for anything to happen (the end of act 1 was horrific in the most amazing way. So many things stuck with me: the state Reigen was left in compared to how he was, Ritsu’s “surgery”, Dimple losing his best friend, Shou’s report to the police, Minori’s conversation (if you can call it that) with Mob?? Bone. Chilling.

One of the parts that has been sitting in my gut is Reigen’s fall, where he starts to ramble through fragments of old times. I genuinely thought he was calling out to Mob until just as the same time Mob did I recognized the words and it hit me like a HAMMER. I don’t know how to put it into words but Reigen rambling on like a broken record tore me apart, and then it gets WORSE. I only realized on my second read that the intro of the fic. (Correct me if I’m wrong) IS REIGENS PERSPECTIVE OF MOB SEVERING HIS TENDONS???? Holy fuck. Holy FUCK. The vague semblance of consciousness written there is so deeply unsettling I’m absolutely OBSESSED with it. ESPECIALLY THE FACT THAT EVEN IN THAT STATE HE STILL WANTS MOB TO BE HAPPY (the cheer ^^ mob bit) and idk if I’m interpreting right (this is gonna be so embarrassing if I’m not) but him recognizing the filthy jacket as well. Taking me OUT. AND. AND THE FACT REIGEN NEVER SPEAKS AGAIN AFTER THAT?????? (I could be wrong oops)

The mental states of every character in the fic are written so chillingly well. I can understand how Mob spirals, the anger and grief Tome feels, Shou's spite and anger, Teruki's conflict, Dimple's loss of his best friend, Serizawa's waning optimism, I can't name every character in this fic but they are ALL characterized so well. There's no needless conflict that make them OOC, there's a reason behind every little tragedy building upon themselves and creating a giant disaster that deeply affects the entire cast. Not to mention how its not just the loss of Reigen and Ritsu, but the loss of Mob too. If they were to have died on impact, its unsettling to think that things may have turned out better than this.

There’s a lot of things I wanna say that would basically be restating the fic (dimple losing his best friend, teru shaving, and the irony of ritsu’s powers being taken away by mob) so instead of writing 20 more paragraphs I’ll ask some questions I’ve been mulling over (ofc yall don’t have to answer if it’s revealing too much or smth)

Does Mob actually end up getting investigated or arrested? The formatting of the social media posts and texts makes them seem as if they're evidence and so does the ongoing "interview?" with Shou throughout the fic

In the party, is Reigen saying he doesn't like citrus a reference to the lemon sour :eyes:

I'm probably missing something but im curious about the metaphor around Reigen and a stray cat (hair clinging to Mob's clothes, comparing him to a stray cat finding a place to die, comparing him to a cat outside Serizawa's door)

If I'm not wrong and the "glitchy" sections at the beginning and end of the fic are Reigen and Ritsu's povs respectively, is their mind constantly like that or is it just in the specific circumstances where they have a small burst of consciousness?

last (thats a lie im definitely drawing more fanart in the future) but not least, some notes from when I was re-reading

[chemicalarospec]

alr y'all i just had the most harrowing experience of my life. be me reading gay fanfiction in bed. finish a good one. about to put down my 'puter and turn it for the night. movement in the corner of my eye. A MASSIVE SPIDER SCURRIES UP THE WALL NEXT TO ME. I leap out of bed and throw my computer on my roommate's bed. My roommate is in another dorm like a 5 minute walk away but i text them anyways. no response. The spider is moving around the corner of my ceiling. I text someone I know on another floor. THEY'RE IN THEIR HOMETOWN. I text my friend on a different floor. No response; likely asleep. (This story spans an hour from 12:30am to 1:30.) I message my family, we come up with multiple strategies for killing. I post about the situation on my Instagram story. I can't work up the courage to enact any of the strategies. I go downstairs and see a couple people but they're all Engaged and don't Look Friendly so I don't want to bother them and return to my room desolate. I post about it on my instagram story again. I spend AT LEAST five minutes standing in my room, trying to work up the courage to kill it. As I write in my third and final instagram story to come later, "I stood on my bed, Hello Kitty magazine in hand, trying to remember the Dune fear mantra, staring down the infernal creature, quivering in my boots socks." Early today I watched Technoblade's old video "dude college is CRAZY I fear for my LIFE" and omg college IS crazy I DO fear for my life. I hear noises out in the hall. I haven't brought myself to interrupt people talking before, but I look out anyways. Three guys (friendly looking) are standing in the lounge area. I walk down. I ask them to help. One of them is the guy next door! One of his friends offers up his slipper but he just grabs a tissue and kills it so casually?!?! I post my final insta story, I update my family and the class of 2028 server in which I also asked for help (they informed me my dorm has a cockroach infestation... yay...). I tell my mom and brother (my dad sleeps on a normal schedule) I'm going to have to read more gay fanfiction to calm down after this, and my brother posts this image:

My mom reacts with a shocked face emoji. Then she explains she's surprised such a "oddly specific meme" exists, which makes the shocked face less funny because it makes more sense.

AND THEN MY ROOMMATE FINALLY TEXTS ME BACK AND THEY WERE SOMEWHERE IN OUR BUILDING THIS WHOLE TIME WITH TWO PPL WILLING TO KILL SPIDERS. (They're in the room of one of the them which I have no idea where their room is lmao my roommate is scarily social.)

So. The trials and tribulations of college. I survived this time. "By the skin of my teeth, and teeth don't even HAVE skin; that's how you know how bad it is!" (missing the king... technoblade never dies)

[safyresky]

Sorry for the late hour but here are some questions! For the ask thing!

I could've literally asked for all the questions to be answered but here's just a few. Please and thank u

54 / 40 (for no reason at all 🤫)/ 39 / 16

I am a cretura of the night, Andie! No worries about the late hour EVER lol ;)

40. If someone were to make fanart of your work, what fic or scene would you hope to see?

Oh I like this one! Let me think! Hmm! You know what's fun? Bullet points! And readmores which I will do. uh. now

Cold front hugs! Specifically the mindscape one in Chapter 6, and the pair of them leaning on one another on the way out of the pond @ the Springs in Chapter 23 of CS! Which yes, isn't a hug, but is a cute Cold Front moment

Winter grabbing Blaise's lapels in Chapter 11 while he has a whole ass crisis >:)

The fucking. (breaks window) Blinter: were those our kids? Jack: SCATTER scene lmaooooooo (from Chapter 22 of CS)

The twins doing one of these (see photo below) on the backyard deck stairs before asking Summer to play fire tag with them

^like that, but like. on all fours. with Fino squashing Fiera lmao

Honestly there's so many scenes I'd love to get fanart of/draw/EXPERIENCE but those are the ones that pop into the head IMMEDIATELY! And that's just CS, AH!. The family photo from Jacqueline Dies pt2 would ALSO be a lovely fanart to see! I actually did a shit doodle of it last week just for funsies:

My god it's so LONG. Sorry about that! anyway!

54. What’s your favourite part about the fanfiction writing process? Shoving an OC or two or five into the story and see how it goes >:). that and uploading a draft and reading it through one last time. That's exciting! I love that part! It's time consuming but I LOVE IT. It's like. THE ANTICIPATION

39. Share a snippet from a WIP

I should like. Assign these wips to numbers and start rolling dice about it. Um. OKAY! From smile shot wip "Believing is Seeing"

“Is it Grapes of Wrath?” “Yes! It actually was! Nice guess, Dite.” Dite and Xander lay on his dream cloud, just behind the chimney of Danielle’s house. Jacqueline snoozed still, curled up on Dite’s thigh. The goddess had lain back; her arms were behind her head as she gazed up at the sky, watching the clouds drift by. On the other side of the cloud, Xander lay on his back as well, one leg dangling, the other one bent at the knee as he read a book. “Alright, I got one. Two exes meet up again after a few years; shenanigans ensue, they still both have it bad for each other. Best slow burn I have ever read.” “Persuasion?” “Awh, you got it on the first go!” Xander laughed. “It’s supposed to be a misleading summary, Dite.” “I just really love Persuasion. It’s one of my favourite books! When Wentworth writes that letter? I just. Ugh,” Dite finished with a happy sigh. “It’s good.” There was a grumble between the two Legates; Dite perked up, sitting up gently. “Hi sleepy head,” she said with a grin. Jacqueline sat up, scrunching up her nose. “That was not four hours.” “Almost twelve, actually,” Xander said. “Dream sand may have had a hand in it.” Jacqueline scratched her neck and stretched her shoulders, shaking her freshly thawed hair off her face. “I didn’t melt all over you, did I?” “You did, but I don’t mind! It was just a little damp, no biggie.” “What’s the status?” “Quiet day,” Xander said, flipping his page. “They’ve stayed in for the most part. Left for errands a while ago, not back yet. Danielle’s still feeling hopeful, though.” “And she’s been meaning to text Charlie all day!” Dite said, chipper. “Can we get closer?” Jacqueline asked. “Why’d we move from the window?” “She ran to it right when she woke up and we were almost caught,” Xander said, flipping another page. “You snore.” “The fuck I do.” “You do,” Dite said. “But it’s cute snores! Like um, like every third breath is a snore.” “A honk sho or a mimimi?” “A weird cross between both.” Jacqueline looked thoughtful, then shrugged. “I can vibe with that. Side note, love that we can swear right now. Feels good, feels wholesome,” she said, hopping off of the cloud and onto the roof. “What are you doing?” Xander asked, putting down his book. “Getting closer! This one’s her room?” Xander nodded. “Quiet, though!” “I thought nobody was home?” “Her sister is.” “Alright, I can be quiet,” Jacqueline said, and, with a little hop, disappeared into thin air. “What is she doing?” Xander asked, trying to find her magical aura. Dite peered over the cloud with Xander. She surveyed the roof, then swatted Xander gently. “Right there, look; fast moving trail of frost headed down the drain pipe. She’s being sneaky,” Dite said with a grin. Xander chuckled. “Nice.” In the distance, car doors slammed and chatter met their ears. Danielle and her Mom had gotten back from their errands and were chatting up a storm. “Things are picking up again!” Dite said with an excited squeal. “We’re almost there, Xander!”

The summary of this one: Charlie tells Danielle about what his Dad REALLY does. Trouble in paradise has Dite on ALERT; determined, she hatches a lil plot and drags Jacqueline and Xander along for the ride. It's been fun to write! This trio of Legates is my fave lmao. They get into situations, and it's tripled when Charlie hangs with them!

16. How many fic ideas are you nurturing right now? Share one of them?

Honestly? Too many! If I had to count, excluding wips, it'd be uh....eight, I think 🤔🤔🤔

My favourite one right now is Diteline Valentine's Day featuring Diteline kiddos! Dite's working and Jacqueline gets the day off. There is a cuddle puddle after Dite leaves for work. The kids ask Jacquie about what Diteline used to do on VDays before kids. Jacquie tells them all about their romance and such and says that every day is VDay with the four of them for her! They decide they wanna do something nice for their moms despite Jacquie's reassurance. Shenanigans ensue!!! Robyn wears a blanket cloak! Eira/Bianca didn't sleep! Joy has been awake for hours bc Valentine's Day! It's a recipe for disaster!

thanks for sending these in 🥰🥰🥰

[crikeygatormate]

I Will Always Return (Pt. 4)

Summary: You were the daughter of the mayor of Wrywood back when the wild west was more than just a movie genre. Your father was a sly politician who managed to find himself stuck between a rock and a hard place with a large crime group that resided in the city and the west’s most notorious group of outlaws. Somehow you find yourself stuck in the middle.

Warnings: Angst, Self-loathing, Men r stupid, like so stupid lmao, gun violence, typos cause I can't spell

I'm sorry in advance I just really like angst lol also I pray this makes sense I sometimes write and have no idea where I'm going with things :,)

Part 5!

Part Four

Your days spent with Izuku were nothing short of boring. He was sweet and attentive to you, but now that you were a wanted criminal you had to stay at his house, and according to him that meant you couldn’t go outside.

The first two days were okay, you had baked. Which was something you haven’t done in a long time. Izuku practically showered you with praise when he tried your cookies and little cakes. He told you it was a treat to come home to something so sweet.

On the third day you cleaned, truly a terrible chore, but your boredom was severe enough that you enjoyed cleaning. It was actually fun.

On the fourth day, you didn’t leave your room. As you reflected on your time at Izuku’s house you slowly came to realize that what you were living was the life your father had planned for you. To stay at home and be a wife. Granted you were nowhere near being Izuku’s wife, but it was more than humiliating to realize you were acting like one.

On the fifth day, Izuku came back with the post for the week. He was timid when he coaxed you out of your room with the promise of a new shirt that actually fit you.

You narrowed your eyes, holding up the long sleeve plaid shirt. It was definitely a women's shirt, but he seemed to thankfully pick up that you wanted riding clothes, so it was made of hardy cotton. You thumbed the pale blue fabric between your fingers wondering why Izuku had bought you, a stranger, such a nice shirt.

“So,” Izuku cleared his throat, “the news came in a few days ago. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner, I just, well, you better prepare yourself,” he said honestly as he unrolled the paper on the oak table.

Your hands immediately grabbed the paper upon seeing a sketch of your face on the front page. It was a warrant for your arrest, a warrant for murder. So Keigo had convinced enough people that you had killed Tokoyami that day. You placed your pointer finger on the paper reading the text below.

The way they described you made your temper flare to a searing scald. “That’s grand,” you spat, “they're calling me hysterical, ridiculous.”

“I know, it gets worse,” Izuku told you.

You frowned reading further down only to see that they had interviewed your father. He stated that you had always had a few screws loose’ and it wasn’t surprising to learn that you murdered a soldier who was trying to help you home. Apparently, you were too fragile-minded to make a coherent decision.

But the worst thing of all was that the sheriff's office in your town had put a reward on your capture, and it was three grand. Apparently, all someone had to do was return you to Keigo Takami so he could ID you, and then you’d be thrown into an asylum, presumably.

Your mouth dried and you looked up at Izuku. He was looking down at you with a concerned expression and the thought that you hated to even acknowledge became prominent in your mind. “You don’t think?” your voice died out before you cleared your throat, “you don’t think he’s gonna bring me back there to get his money right? He needed three grand.”

Izuku gulped as he folded his arms over his chest. “I’m really not sure. Kacchan is a good guy, really, but he’s got a drive in him to get revenge on Keigo. He’d do just about anything to put that guy six feet under.”

Any hope that you had left for Bakugou was completely shredded and burned to ash, and it made you mad. So mad that you crumpled the paper in your fist. “Izuku, I can’t let that happen.”

“I know, but my hands are tied,” he told you honestly, “you’re a wanted criminal and there’s no one besides me who would hide you from him or the military.”

“Then let me go,” you argued, standing to your feet. “I can’t go back, not like this.”

Izuku shifted his weight, “I can’t let you go, not before Kacchan comes back.”

You grit your teeth, feeling your adrenaline spike, “I don’t care, I’m goin’.”

You and Izuku stared at each other from across the table, tense. He was waiting for you to move, presumably to grab you and lock you up, but you weren’t stupid, and you weren’t weak. After the two and half weeks of hell you’ve gone through, you’ve proved to yourself that you were not as fragile as you thought.

“Don’t do this,” Izuku said seriously, watching you closely.

“I don’t have a choice,” you hissed as you let your eyes dart back towards your room.

Izuku was obviously tracking your gaze with his eyes, seeing where you were going to run and once he saw you look towards your room he lunged.

However, you had planned for that to happen. You easily jumped out of his way, tossing the chair you were sitting in back towards him. You then sprinted towards the front door and swung it open squinting as hot summer air hit your skin.

You ran towards the barn, not daring to look behind you as you headed towards the stall your horse was in. Footsteps thudded behind you and you knew Izuku was not too far behind. With quick pants, you flung open the stall door, grabbed your horse's bridle, and pulled it over his head. There was no time to actually put his bridle on so it sat around his neck, and you hope this horse could neck rein.

You grabbed a handful of your horse’s mane and swung up over his side forgoing the tack because you didn’t have time. You kicked his sides causing him to jolt before racing out of the open barn past Izuku who leaped out of the way so he wouldn’t get run over.

You looked behind you seeing Izuku scramble to grab his saddle and you grinned. He couldn’t ride bareback apparently. Now that you were getting away from him, you didn’t know where to go. Granted this probably wasn’t your smartest idea.

You couldn’t ride into town so you headed back away towards the woods. The sound of a horse squealing sounded behind you and you turned your head to see that Izuku had finally made his way out of the stable, barely. His horse was pissed and starting to buck, serves him right.

You huffed turning back around as you deepened your seat as your horse sped up. You were both panting as you tore across the sandy plain, dust billowing behind you. In a way, part of your dream was fulfilled just by this horse, which you were now officially claiming as yours. He was the only constant in your life.

As you grew further away from Izuku the pressure in your chest seemed to loosen, and you knew you were free again. At least for now.

That small glimmer of hope you had quickly diminished when you saw a familiar dark bay horse trot out from the treeline followed by a black horse and a palomino. So he had brought Kirishima and Kaminari with him.

He was planning on taking you down to Keigo. Of course he was. You knew that, Bakugou was a criminal that was all. He took what he wanted and gave only if there was an advantage. “Asshole,” you grumbled as you looked towards another large river that cut through the land. This one was wide, but it looked shallow enough to cross, and since your horse had no saddle you could easily swim across.

By the time you changed directions heading towards the river, Izuku had managed to meet up with Bakugou and the others, obviously telling them what had happened. Now all four of them were chasing you.

Izuku and Kaminari were slow riders. You knew Bakugou was fast, but you never expected a man as big as Kirishima to be riding fast. It didn’t matter though, you were going to outrun them before either one caught up to you.

However, a pop from a pistol had you almost freeze. Someone had shot at you and you quickly turned your head to see that Kaminari had his pistol out. Bakugou shouted something at him and Kaminari pulled back on his horse's reins, falling away from the group.

Tears pricked your eyes as you looked away from them once more. So that’s how it was gonna be then? You really were just an investment after all. Another step in Bakugou’s ladder that he used to get to the top, to get to Keigo. You slowed your horse down as he loped into the water. Just when you were about to step off the drop-off, Bakugou and the others had skidded to a halt at the bank, mud and pebbles sprayed the surface of the river.

“What the hell are you doing?” Bakugou shouted, kicking his horse's sides to get him into the water.

“Fuck off!” you shouted back, hating that your emotions were raging inside your head, making tears roll down your cheeks. “I’m not stupid! You think you can yank me around, play with my head?”

“The fuck are you talkin’ about!” Bakugou shouted again as his horse took a few timid steps into the water.

Kirishima’s horse reared, not wanting to get in the mud which made Izuku’s horse start to buck again. It was chaos to say the least. You watched as both men were thrown from their saddles, landing harshly on the river bank as their horses took off back towards Izuku’s stables.

You looked back at Bakugou, watching his horse paw at the water, “don’t act dumb, you’re gonna bring me to Keigo to get your damn money.” The shock that crossed Bakugou’s face was all you needed to see. You scoffed, “yeah, thought so.”

Bakugou looked back at Izuku who was starting to stand up, holding his lower back as his green eyes cut between the two of you. “Deku, you showed her the post?” Bakugou said, there was an edge to his voice.

“She would have found out anyway,” Izuku admitted.

You wiped your cheeks roughly, wincing when the fresh scar from the bullet that grazed your cheek split open due to your rough movements. There was no reason to wait for Bakugou to respond, not anymore. You weren’t going to wait for him.

“Wait,” Bakugou’s voice carried over the water. He was closer now, but it was clear he couldn’t get his horse to go any deeper. “Just hear me out.”

“Hear you out?” you spat, turning your horse around so you could look at him. His face was passive, so passive for someone who was supposed to be on your side. That was naive to even think he was on your side in the first place. “You must be joking?”

“‘M not, just hold on,” Bakugou sighed heavily as he ran his good hand through his hair. He must have lost his hat a while back.

“No, I’m not gonna sit here and listen to you,” you snapped, and turned your horse back around and urged him into the deeper part of the river. Once he stepped off the bank you dropped off his back, holding onto his red mane while he swam to the other side.

“Y/n!” Bakugou shouted, his voice was starting to grow hoarse from yelling so much.

You grit your teeth and ignored him. There was a new type of heaviness that weighed down on your chest the further you traveled from him, and before you knew it you were about to reach the other end of the river.

However, a golden horse was waiting for you on the other side. How you didn’t see him come out of the woods was beyond you, but the moment you saw Kaminari smirking down at you, everything fell apart.

“That was pretty smart, riding across the river bareback, but no one outsmarts Bakugou,” Kaminari said as he tossed a rope around your horse's head after yanking the bridle around his neck off. “Get back on, you’re not goin’ anywhere.”

You hesitated thinking of any way you could escape, but once again you had your freedom stripped away. Your shoulders slumped as you got back on your horse. Your clothes clung to your body as you let Kaminari lead you down the river and towards a bridge that you didn’t notice before.

It made you think that the universe must want to clip your wings. Every time you tried to fly away you were promptly brought back to the earth.

When you meet back up with Bakugou and the others you stayed silent. You refused to look at him, at any of them. All you could do was watch the muscles of your horse ripple as he walked behind Kaminari.

Bakugou rode next to you. He opened his mouth a few times to speak, but he was unable to find his voice. He hasn’t known you for long, but he now knows you well. Well enough to see that whatever flame of spirit you had inside of you was doused.

“Stop starin’ at me,” you said quietly, not evening sparing him a glance.

“Just let me explain,” Bakugou almost pleaded.

The three men in front of you two all turned their heads, eyes wide at the way Bakugou was speaking to you.

“No,” you answered as a shiver wracked over your form.

“Y/n, I’m bein’ serious,” he said, hoping you’d just listen.

“I’m being serious,” you snapped back and then turned your head to look at him. He looked tired like he hadn’t slept well the past couple of days. “I’m being serious,” you repeated, swallowing thickly as you looked him straight in the eyes, “when I’m saying to stop, I don’t want to listen to you. In fact, Bakugou, if there was the option to never see you again I would take it in a heartbeat.”

Bakugou’s eyebrows rose at your venomous words.

Before he got the chance to respond you were already ready to spit more venom at him, “I can’t believe that you are going to turn me in to Keigo. Especially after everything you’ve told me about yourself, what I’ve told you? You know what they're gonna do with me? Surely you do, how else would you know about the reward money, huh?

How can you live with yourself? Putting money over someone's life? Go ahead and shoot me now, I’d rather be dead than be stuck in some asylum,” you hissed, tears pricking your eyes again. You huffed, wiping the blood away from your cheek.

Bakugou was silent, and turned his gaze away from you and set his jaw. He remained quiet.

“Pathetic,” you said, your voice heavy with sorrow.

Kirishima cleared his throat, “Izuku, Denki, why don’t you two walk up ahead?”

Izuku nodded and helped lead Kaminari back towards his house.

You looked behind you briefly to see that Kirishima was talking with Bakugou, looking a little frustrated. It didn’t matter though, it wasn’t like you even cared anymore.

—--------------

It took a while to get back to Izuku’s house but once you did you found yourself shut back in the bedroom. At least you were dry, and as much as you hated to admit it, the shirt Izuku had picked out was nice.

You could hear them talking through the door. Kirishima sounded angry, his deep voice carried through the log walls. You heard Kaminari laugh a few times. They were obviously planning on what to do with you.

It did hurt, more than you’d admit, having Bakugou stab you in the back like that. You were so loyal to him, and for no reason at all. All it granted you were a few moments of gilded freedom. You shook your head, you were such an idiot for even letting him in.

And you did let him in, you had thick walls and it took no time at all for you to knock them down for him. For a caustic man who only thought of himself.

A soft knock on your door had you turning your head and you were mildly surprised to see Kirishima poke his head in.

“Do you mind if I come in?” he asked.

You shook your head, “I don’t mind.”

Kirishima nodded and slipped into your room and softly shut the door behind him before making his way to the chair by the bed. He sat down, letting out a groan when he tweaked his sore muscles wrong.

“If you’re in here to talk for Bakugou, I don’t want to hear it,” you said quickly as you folded your arms over your chest.

Kirishima shook his head, “nah, I’m not in here to be Katsuki’s voice. I just wanted to check in on you?”

You rolled your eyes, “look, you don’t have to play the nice guy, Kirishima.”

“‘M not,” he said honestly. “It’s been a tough few weeks for you, anyone would know that.”

“Right,” you said bitterly. “Just get on with what you want to say, I’m not really in the mood for a heart-to-heart.”

Kirishima stretched his legs out, crossing them at his ankles. “Well if you insist. I’m here to tell you the plan. If you’re interested, that is, which I’m sure you would be.”

You glanced at him through narrowed eyes, “I don’t care.”

Kirishima shrugged, brushing off your sour mood. He was used to being around someone prickly. “We’re leavin’ in about a week or so, just so Katsuki’s shoulder can heal some more. But we’ll be headin’ back to your town to drop you off with Keigo, and then get our money.”

That knife in your back seemed to dig a little bit deeper now that Kirishima had voiced just what you were worried about.

“But,” Kirishima added, “there's a lot more to it, and I get your reaction, I do. Katsuki is probably the most apathetic man I know, and he’s absolutely terrible when it comes to explaining anything without making someone upset. Also, Izuku should have never shown you the post, that made everything much more complicated than it ever should have been.

You're obviously gonna come back with us. I don’t know why you thought we’d leave ya behind. You’re only gonna be with Keigo for a few moments before Izuku takes you off to your next destination, which will be back here.

That three grand is what we need to buy Keigo’s past estate and finally get proof for all the crimes he committed.” Kirishima explained.

Your eyes widened, “what? Are you kidding?”

“See? Not so bad-”

“Yes, that's bad!” you interrupted, “why didn’t anyone tell me that first! You made me think my life as I knew it was over!”

Kirishima’s cheeks flushed, “I suppose it could have been handled better.”

“You suppose? Get the hell out,” you snapped and promptly stood up and opened the door.

Kirishima held his hands up as he quickly rose from his chair and slipped back out of your room. You heard Kaminari laugh at him before you shut the door.

Your head was starting to pound from the sheer range of emotions you had gone through all in one day. With an exasperated sigh you laid down on the feather bed and pressed your cheek against the pillow Izuku had given you. Before you knew it you had fallen asleep. You were quickly pulled into such a deep dreamless sleep that you didn’t even wake up when your door opened.

Bakugou had been knocking for a while, growing frustrated that you weren’t answering, but after what you had told him today, he wasn’t surprised. “I’m comin’ in,” he announced and slowly opened the door only to find you fast asleep. He frowned, keeping his gaze locked in on your form. He could see that your cheeks were wet again.

You were crying in your sleep.

And it made him feel like shit, which he knew he deserved.

—-------------

You were up early the next day before the sun had slipped over the horizon, the sky was a pale pink and that meant that it was going to storm later. Which was fine with you, it would match your current mood.

You were still mad, of course, you were. Who wouldn’t be pissed that they had kept you in the dark?

How on earth he thought it would be okay to leave you at Izuku’s, run off for almost a week, and come back presenting his plan to you and expect you to immediately agree. If Izuku had not shown you the paper, you weren’t sure how you would have reacted to having all that info dumped on you at once.

You frowned as you gripped the stall fork tighter in your hands as you thought about your bounty. Not to mention, the fact that your bounty was set at three grand meant one thing, your father was planning on taking you back, getting the money, and paying off Bakugou. It wasn’t a coincidence.

A bitter taste filled your mouth just thinking back on the bald bastard. He had the audacity to say those vile things about you in the post? Ridiculous.

You were brought out of your thoughts by the sound of heavy boots thumping against the ground and the last person you wanted to see walked through the barn doors.

He looked even more tired today, his red eyes were dull as he took a hearty sip from what you could assume was a cup of coffee. He was also dressed down, wearing a red shirt that was tucked into his jeans. His hair was wet too, just starting to dry as the morning began to warm.

You huffed and turned your back to him and continued to muck your horse’s stall, considering throwing a rake full of stall shavings and piss at him. As much as it would be funny, it was childish and so far, it seems Bakugou has only seen you act in such a manner when you were mad. Even if it was warranted.

You didn’t like being so emotional around him, but he brought out a side of you that you’ve never seen before. You didn’t know how to deal with it, and it was annoying. It made you feel out of control.

His footsteps came to a stop outside of your stall and you waited a moment before glancing at him over your shoulder through narrowed eyes.

He kept his face passive when he met your heated glare, but after a brief moment, he sighed. “Can we talk?” he asked, setting his mug down on a large barrel of grain by the stall door.

You turned around fully, leaning a bit on the rake as you pondered his question. Did he come here to apologize? Surely not, he’s never once said sorry for anything. “Depends,” you began, hating the way that the morning light was starting to cast him in a soft glow, “what are you wantin’ to talk about?”

Bakugou shifted his weight, clearly uncomfortable. “About the plan-”

“Not interested,” you interrupted and turned back around, gritting your teeth. You knew he was gonna bring that up. All that mattered was his plan and his way.

“Can you just listen?” Bakugou asked, irritation heavy in his voice.

“No,” you replied smoothly, “I don’t think I will.”

“Damn you,” Bakugou hissed, “you’re such fuckin’ trouble.”

So he was mad now. Fine. He can be mad, get all huffy and run off like he does. You noticed that about him, every time he got frustrated he’d leave. Lord knows why, but it was annoying as hell. A dry laugh bubbled past your lips as you tossed some more dirty shavings into the wheelbarrow next to you, “glad to finally know what you think of me.”

“No, that’s not-” Bakugou sighed heavily, “-just fuckin’ listen to me, please.”

Please?

That piqued your interest a little bit. He must really want to tell you something if he’s using basic manners. You turned, holding his gaze as you moved towards the grain bucket and picked up his mug. You held it out waiting for him to take it, and when he did you opened the lid and took the bucket by the door. Then you filled it about halfway before setting it on the ground.

Your horse lifted his head, nostrils flared at the scent of food and he immediately rushed to your side snorting as he dunked his face into the feed bucket.

“You have until he finishes eating to talk, you better hurry, you and I both know this horse eats fast,” you said leaning against the edge of the stall as you waited for him to start.

Bakugou’s eyes slightly widened as he glanced down at the bucket, seeing that it was already a fourth empty. “I was never gonna drop you off to Keigo, that was never an option. Never even crossed my mind, but once that wanted poster came out, it became the best option to use you as bait again.”

He glanced down at the bucket again, it was halfway gone now, “I know that sounds fucked, and I didn’t just ignore what you told me. I need to do this, it’s my only chance.”

“Only chance for what?” you asked, raising an eyebrow at him.

“If I get that three grand, Kirishima and I will finally have proof to put Keigo in jail. That day I was tellin’ you about my family and couldn’t finish the story,” Bakugou began, swallowing harshly, “they didn’t die from a fever. Keigo killed them all. Played it off as illness.

I believed him all the way up till we were in the military together. Kirishima, Keigo, Deku, and I bunked together. Found his little journal with a fuckin’ box full of teeth. The fucker labeled them. I understood then that he killed our families and that he was sick in the head.

Kirishima and I left, obviously, we couldn't stand to be in the same place as him, talk with him, fuckin’ look at him. The only person who knew we were leavin’ was Deku. He promised to keep our secret and he has ever since. So that’s why I need the money, Kirishima and I figured he’s got some damning evidence in that house buried somewhere. Probably put it up for sale for the thrill of it. Fuckin bastard.”

The grain in the bucket was long gone and your horse had moved back to the haynet hanging from the wall. You stood there, stunned. So that’s why he turned to crime and became an outlaw. He was trying to save up enough money, and it’s taken him years to even get this close. You figured he was close once, when your father offered them the cash he needed, only to have it swiped out from underneath his nose. That must have been devastating.

And you knew that Keigo had done something horrible to Bakugou and Kirishima, but not something so terrible, so sinister. It horrified you to learn that he had kept souvenirs. “Bakugou, I’m so sorry.”

“I don’t want any fuckin’ pity,” he snapped, red eyes ablaze with fierce anger, but his expression softened when he saw you frown.

“I wish you would have told me that sooner,” you said, ignoring his harsh words. “I mean, I would never push you, but I would have had a better understanding on why you wanted to use me as bait.”

Bakugou sighed, nodding in agreement. He’s never been good with words or opening up. “I know, and I’m sorry.”

He’s sorry? You furrowed your brows, he apologized. “I’m still upset,” you told him truthfully, “and a little scared,” you added, not liking the idea that you’ll be with Keigo even if it was for a moment.

“I know,” Bakugou replied, rubbing his eyes. He was so fucking tired, its been days since he had a good night's sleep. He brought his hands down from his face and pushed them into his front pockets, “you’ll be fine though, Deku will be there the whole time.”

“And what about you? Where will you be?” you asked, curious. Now that you sort of made up with him, you weren’t so sour to admit that you wanted him close. It was comfortable being by him now.

“Close by,” Bakugou answered quickly, “we all will be.”

“And what if it goes wrong? What if Keigo knows that you’ll be the one dropping me off? How do you know he’s not just baiting you, getting you close to your goal before yanking the prize away?” you said. It was a valid question. Bakugou’s plan seemed impromptu, rushed, and definitely emotionally motivated which meant that something could go wrong.

And that meant you could be left behind. A part of you still didn’t trust that Bakugou had let you into his little tight-knit circle. You still felt like you were just an investment being pushed around and used whenever necessary. Which you hated.

“That won’t happen,” Bakugou said seriously.

“You don’t know that,” you replied, folding your arms over your chest as unease settled heavy in your gut.

“I do, quit arguing,” he said, his voice strained. To be honest, he didn’t know. He was scared too. He’s been careful over the years not to get caught, but he’d be heading right into the belly of the beast with this plan. But it was his only shot.

You huffed, irritated at him. “I’m not doin’ it,” you announced before turning back around. Sure you felt for him immensely, but there was no way you were going along with some dumbass poorly put-together plan that puts everyone in danger.

“Huh?” Bakugou hissed, immediately surging forward to grip the stall door, he looked pissed to hell, “the fuck do you mean you’re not doin’ it? After everything, I just told you?”

You shrugged, “hurts doesn’t it? Feeling like someone betrayed you.”

“I already apologized-”

“I’m allowed to still be upset,” you responded coolly, trying to rein in your temper, “and I don’t wanna be a part of your plan because it’s bad. There are too many loose ends that need to be tied up.” You turned around again as you went to grab the wheelbarrow, “I do want to help you, but not like this.”

“You gotta be fuckin’ kidding me?” Bakugou growled, his voice almost rising to a shout. He watched you move past him heading out of the barn to dump your dirty shavings in the grass. He was hot on your heels though, practically breathing down your neck.

You tipped over the wheelbarrow rolling your eyes as you set it against the barn wall. “I’m not, honest,” you said as you moved to get a water bucket and head to the small pond near Izuku’s house.

You glanced behind you to see that Bakugou was still stomping after you, cursing you out rather loudly as he followed you to the pond. The sky was quickly turning to a dark grey and a cold gust of wind swept through the grasses around you.

“Well if you’re so smart, then why don’t you come up with a plan then?” Bakugou said harshly, his gaze burning holes in the back of your head.

You stopped in front of the pond, bending down to fill the bucket, “maybe I will.”

“Well then fuckin’ tell me what you’re thinkin’? I never have any idea what’s brewing in that head of yours, god you’re so annoying,” he snapped, letting his anger start to taint his words.

Your frowned, standing back up to your full height, “it’s been less than ten minutes since I found all of this out, can’t pull a new plan right out of my ass. And honestly, you’re annoying, Bakugou,” you started, pushing a finger harshly into his chest, “I have no idea what’s going on in your head either, maybe if you would actually try to communicate some more, this would have been a lot easier.”

Bakugou bared his teeth at you, engulfing your hand in his large one as he yanked your hand away from his chest. The wind was starting to pick up to a soft howl and some cold droplets of rain began to fall, wetting the dry earth at his boots. “You never leave me alone,” he hissed, not even sure what he meant by that.

“Pretty sure I’ve left you alone for the past five days,” you shot back, glancing up to his hand over yours. He was so tall that he was practically holding your arm up.

“Such a smart ass,” he said, narrowing his eyes as it started to rain. “No one besides you ever talks back to me, you know that?”

“Oh please,” you snorted, wiping your eyes as the rain began to fall harder, “don’t tell me that hurt your feelings?”

“Shut your mouth,” he sneered, his upper lip twitching at the satisfied grin that was growing across your face. He took an involuntary step towards you, invading your space as he bent down a little, his red eyes never leaving yours. “I’m so fuckin’ sick of your attitude, your face, your voice always in my fuckin’ head, makin’ me mess up.”

Your eyebrows rose as you blinked up at him. He was so close, closer than he’s ever been. You blinked some more water out of your eyes as you watched him drop his arm down, still keeping your hand tight in his. “Mess up?” you questioned, your voice had died down, but he was close enough to hear you above the wind and the rain.

“I don’t know,” he grumbled, clearly frustrated, “can’t think when I’m by you. I’m always messin’ up.”

Your heart skipped a beat and it seemed that the rain had put out your fiery attitude as he bent his head down more, making your foreheads touch. He was warm and even though it was raining you could smell the aftershave on his skin, it reminded you of the evergreen forest up in the mountains. “I don’t know what to say,” you admitted, completely unsure of what was about to happen.

Bakugou let out a breath, gaze sliding down from your eyes and to your lips that were slightly parted. He unfurled his hand from yours, and his gaze cut over to see that you had intertwined your fingers with his. It made his head feel like it was full of fluff, and he couldn’t gather any of his thoughts. “Then don't say anything,” he said softly.

Your eyes widened when he leaned in and to your utter shock, he pressed his lips against yours. It was strange, the emotion that filled your chest so quickly when you allowed yourself to shut your eyes and lean into the kiss. It felt like you had a little flame in your chest that was growing larger and larger, it never burned you, it just remained warm and steady.

Bakugou brought up his free hand cupping the side of your face as he ran his thumb across your cheek, a little upset to feel that your wound hasn't healed yet. But a soft whimper from you had him completely forget about your cut and turn his attention back to you.

He was so soft, so gentle for someone so aggressive and wiry. But as he continued to kiss you in the rain you were reminded of all the times he has been gentle with you, and at that moment you realized he’s always been gentle with you in his own way.

Your eyelids fluttered open when he pulled away from you, his lips were slightly swollen and his cheeks were tinged pink. You were awestruck and absolutely speechless and what had just happened, and so was he.

For a beat, you both stood there in the cool rain watching each other before he dropped his hand from your face.

You missed the warmth of his hand almost immediately. Wishing he could just hold your face forever. It was then you also realized you liked him, a lot. In your time spent together, he had become someone special to you. He occupied a place in your heart that no one has ever owned, and Bakugou wormed his way in without you noticing.

“Bakugou,” you began, breaking the silence between you both, “I-”

“I gotta go,” Bakugou quickly interrupted, clearing his throat. His hand dropped from yours and he shoved it deep into his pocket like you had burned him.

“Wait,” you sputtered, your heart racing in your chest as you grabbed his forearm, “don’t leave like this again. I don’t know much, but you can’t keep running,” you told him, your eyes frantically searching his.

“These things don’t work for me,” Bakugou told you, his shoulders were up by his ears again, “I’m sorry.”

You dropped your hand from his arm as you watched him walk away from you with heavy steps. The rain was falling harder, making your vision blur as he continued to walk away from you. Again. Why was he always leaving?

You shakily inhaled feeling another surge of emotions wash over you. It stung to have him reject you. If that was even what rejection was? You had no idea, but whatever you were feeling it hurt.

After standing in the rain for a couple of minutes, trying to process what had just happened, you picked up the bucket, water sloshing from the top as you made your way back to the barn. The world was cruel, you thought bitterly as you placed the bucket in your horse’s stall.

All your life you’ve longed to be independent and never have to rely on a man for anything. Over the years you had plenty of suitors, some of them were great, most of them weren’t, but you always shut them out no matter what. And now…now when you found yourself wanting to be with someone, with him.

He was the one who shut you out. Tore down all your walls only to keep his strong and unbreakable.

You wiped your eyes, disappointed that you even tried. “Is there something wrong with me?” you asked your horse, whose ears swiveled towards you. “I guess, there must be,” you muttered.

—--------

Bakugou avoided you like the plague after the moment you both shared in the rain. At first, you tried to get his attention, offer him a weak smile, but he would turn and leave. It was terrible.

Especially because you still liked him. Your feelings weren’t going away no matter how hard you tried to repress them.

As the days passed, you soon began to understand that Bakugou didn’t want you, and he probably never did. It still stung, but you were able to withdraw more into yourself instead of looking to him for anything anymore.

Eventually, Mina and Sero showed up, which was good. You liked Mina, she was nice, a little blunt, but overall nice. She immediately picked up on what had happened between Bakugou and you, but never pushed you to say anything.

You still spent most of your time alone, feeling like an outsider however hard you tried to fit in. Kirishima assured you again that you ran with them, but how could you feel like you did when their leader didn’t like you?

Maybe you didn’t belong anywhere.

You didn't fit in at home and you didn’t fit in with the outlaws. So where did you fit in? You didn’t know, but every night you would stare at the ceiling of Izuku’s house, listening to the others outside, talking around the fire, and wishing things were normal. Like they were in the mountains.

“You seem sad,” Izuku’s voice cut into your thoughts.

You turned your head, looking away from the window where you could see Sero and Bakugou shooting at glass bottles. “Why do you say that?”

Izuku shrugged as he sat on the arm of the chair you were in, “dunno, you just seem different. Distant.”

You huffed, glancing back at the window, “do you sometimes feel like you don’t belong with them? Because you're a sheriff?”

Izuku tracked your gaze as his landed on Bakugou. He sighed, “yeah, I do. I’ve never fit in with them,” he admitted.

“Really?” you said, raising a brow as you rested your cheek against your forearm, “I couldn’t tell, honestly.”

Deku nodded, “yeah, I suppose it’s better now, but when we were back in the military things were different. I tried to be friends with him so badly, but he always pushed me away. He’s a hard person to get close to.”

“How did you get close to him?” you asked, feeling a little hope flutter in your chest.

“I still haven’t really,” Izuku admitted, a muscle twitching in his jaw as his gaze slid over to Kirishima.

“Oh,” you replied, feeling the weight on your shoulders return.

“I know you like him,” Izuku said rather bluntly, “but if I’m bein’ honest, Y/n, you deserve a better man than Bakugou.”

You cleared your throat, scrambling to come up with a lie to hide your feelings, “What makes you say that? I don’t even like him.”

Izuku snorted, “everyone knows you like him, you watch him like a hawk and get all flustered when he’s around,” he paused, smiling to himself a little before looking down at you, “just do yourself a favor and try to move on.” He stood up and gave your shoulder a squeeze before walking outside and leaving you alone.

You furrowed your brows, wondering why Izuku was telling you something so personal? Not to mention, he didn’t use Bakugou’s nickname while he was talking to you. He must have been mad then, was he mad at Bakugou?

You sighed, as you looked back out the window again. Maybe Izuku was right, maybe you did deserve better, but you didn’t know what was better. You did know that Bakugou has treated your heart rather poorly, he practically stomped on it. But that didn’t even seem to matter to you.

What a cruel joke.

With a sigh you stood up and walked outside, hoping to distract yourself by coming up with a new plan that didn’t involve you getting dropped right into Kiego’s lap. That was another problem, you couldn’t seem to come up with anything better than having you as bait. It really was the best option and it scared you shitless.

“Y/n,” Mina’s chirpy voice carried on the wind as she waved at you from where she was standing by Bakugou and Sero.

Your heart flopped in your chest as you stiffly made your way over to them. Hating that Bakugou was already pocketing his pistol, ready to leave. You felt gross in your own skin seeing his lips turn down into a frown at the sight of you.

“Hold your horses,” Mina said with a goofy grin as she grabbed Bakugou’s arm, holding him still by her, “I wanna see how good of a teacher you are.”

“Let go of me,” Bakugou hissed, his eyes frantically cutting between you and Mina.

You stopped, feeling a lump form in your throat but you quickly swallowed it and plastered on a smile, “pretty shitty teacher, if you ask me. I’m a terrible shot. Never been able to hit anything.” Your words as much as you tried to make them sound normal, were obviously fake.

Sero rolled his eyes and handed you the pistol he was using, “go ahead.”

You took the pistol, blinking away the image of Tokoyami's face that flashed in your mind. You took a breath before pointing the pistol, holding it like you were taught and keeping both eyes on the brown glass bottle sitting on the fence post. Your pointer finger pressed on the trigger and you flinched when the gun went off.

However, to your surprise you hit the bottle, making it shatter in thousands of pieces. They flew through the air glittering as sunlight danced on their sharp edges. You smiled, your first smile since that day.

Mina laughed, grabbing you roughly by the neck as she punched Sero roughly in the chest, “pay up! I told ya!”

Sero grumbled, yanking out a few dollars from his pocket, and begrudgingly handed them over to Mina who hooted loudly.

“Gonna buy us somethin’ nice, hear that Y/n!” Mina shouted waving the money up in the air, “maybe some candy? I sure do love those peppermints that old hag sells downtown. Wadda think?” she asked, looking at you with sparkling eyes.

You laughed, it felt good to laugh, “that would be nice, thanks, Mina.”

“Of course!” she bellowed, “gotta stay close, you and I do, these boys are more trouble than they’re worth,” she added, her gaze cutting to Bakugou who was smiling a little.

You snorted, squirming in her tight embrace and you involuntarily looked towards Bakugou, looking for his approval. When you saw he was smiling, even a small one, it made your heart soar and the little flicker of hope you had been kindling seemed to grow a little.

But, the smile slipped off his face and he pulled his arm out of Mina’s grasp and headed back to the house.

Sero clicked his tongue, clearly irritated as he placed his pistol back in the holster attached to his belt.

—-----------------------------------

Later that night after dinner everyone was seated around Izuku’s kitchen table. Tomorrow marked the day you were going to be turned in to Keigo. You had a loose plan, that you knew wouldn’t fly once you presented it, but you could try.

Izuku told you before dinner to tell your idea anyway, even though Bakugou would gripe about it. You had a right to an idea after since you were the one being used as bait.

“Um,” you began, your voice catching as you spoke up, trying to remain confident as six pairs of eyes turned to you. “I know tomorrow is the big day,” you chuckled, no one laughed, “but I still don’t like the plan, so I came up with an alternative.”

It was silent still, so you continued, “my father presumably set my bounty to three grand so he could pay you all of, and get rid of me. Kill two birds with one stone. So instead of you all traveling down to my town and putting yourself in danger being there, I’ll go back home alone. Where my father will no doubt turn me in, get the money and you can take it from him then. Izuku can still come so I don’t get taken anywhere.”

You looked to Izuku who was nodding his head from next to you.

“It’s a good idea, I’ll be there so nothing goes wrong, and you guys won’t have to deal with the military if they’re there.”

Bakugou frowned, his vermillion gaze cutting between you and Izuku. “I don’t like it.”

“Why not?” you asked “You still get your money, and you all stay safe.”

“How do I know your father’s not gonna take the money all for himself,” Bakugou asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Well, that’s where I come in,” Izuku said. “Everyone knows Y/n’s father rigged his polls, which is illegal. I can’t even believe he’s still a free man, honestly, so I’ll arrest him. No big deal.”

“I like it,” Mina said with a smile, “it’s less work and we don’t have to put ourselves at risk.”

“Too fuckin’ bad,” Bakugou hissed, his eyes narrowing at Izuku, “I’m not gonna do it, too much risk.”

“There’s no risk,” you shot back, growing frustrated. “There is literally no risk to you at all, the person who is risking the most is me. You can sit back and I’ll get you the money, and,” you mouth dried as you thought back on Izuku’s words, you deserved better, “and then I’m goin’.”

Bakugou blinked, unsure if he heard you right, “you’re goin? The hell do you mean by that?”

“Once you get your money, I’m goin’ because I’m not needed anymore. I really appreciate you taking me in, but I don’t think this is right for me. It isn’t working out for me,” you said, throwing the words he told you days ago right back in his face.

“I think that’s fine,” Kirishima said, folding his arms over his chest, “you’ll be free from your father's place and we’ll have our money. Seems like a fair trade.”

You gave Kirishima a thankful smile. “Thanks, Kirishima.”

“Looks like you’re outvoted, Kacchan,” Izuku said with a satisfied smile.

Bakugou’s eyes narrowed to slits and he abruptly stood from his chair and stormed out of Izuku's house, slamming the log door behind him.

“Phew!” Kaminari said with a laugh, “don’t know why he’s so upset when you two are doin’ all the work for us. I’d be thankin’ y’all if I was him.”

You gave Kaminari a forced smile, but your gaze slid back to the door. There he goes again, running away. Just like he always does. It was good for you to leave because you couldn’t stay with someone who was never for you in the first place.

“Then it’s settled,” Izuku said as he stood up, “Y/n and I will be leaving right away.”

“Good luck,” Sero said truthfully as you passed by him. “I guess if this is the last time I’ll be seein’ you, I have to admit you are not as prissy as I thought you were.”

You grinned, “thanks, Sero. I think.”

He snorted and you followed Izuku out of his house and towards the stables. Your heart was heavy in your chest to say goodbye to the horse you’ve grown so close to, but at the end of the day, he wasn’t yours. He belonged to Bakugou.

While Izuku tacked up his horse you silently opened the stall next to his, approaching the large red gelding. He knickered and walked over to you, nudging your hands with his pink nose, looking for treats.

“‘M sorry, I don’t have anything for you,” you muttered, bringing a hand up to his face to pet his forelock.

He huffed, still looking for treats as you held back some tears for an animal that was never yours. You should have tried to not get attached, but you two have been through a lot, and it was hard to say goodbye.

“Hey, I’m ready to go,” Izuku said as he led his horse out of her stall.

“Okay,” you replied, looking back at the red gelding, “bye, I’ll miss you,” you said softly, giving him one last pet before leaving his stall and heading over to Izuku.

Izuku held out his hand as you took it, standing on his boot in the stirrup as you got on behind him. You wrapped your arms around Izuku’s torso as he spurred his horse on.

Your chest felt tight as you passed the house and neared the pond. You could see him standing by the water with his hands in his pockets. He was looking out into the distance and turned his head upon seeing you and Izuku pass by him.

You let out a breath, squeezing Izuku more tightly as Bakugou turned away from you and began walking back to the house

You’d miss him the most.

[letters-from-eros]

Can I get some big brother chuuya hc with a little brother (or you can do gender neutral! Which ever you prefer!) that's also in the port mafia

A/N: I was rewatching AOT and realized Jean had Chuuya's VA today so yeah Chu-Chu content. This might be really really bad I'm an only child 😙

Pairings: Chuuya Nakahara x Sibling!Reader (GN)

Form: HC

Warnings: Probably shit writing, I haven't done anything in WEEKS

Beta-Readers: Wifey @bokuno-volleybabes

Mmmmmm Big brother Chuuya. Interesting.

Overall, he's a really good brother to you, I don't think you could really ask for much better tbh.

Yeah you two do bicker a lot, especially if you managed to be taller than the poor lil alcoholic, but it isn't constant unless you're the one provoking him

God the amount of SHIT Chuuya gives you if you're shorter OR taller than him god bless your SOUL, believe when I say 90% of your arguments come from the concept of height.

I definitely think hating Dazai is something that runs in the family, if it doesn't good luck having to hear all about Chuuya's hatred towards the suicidal bastard.

But!! If you do hate Dazai as much as your brother does, y'all would tag-team and roast his ass so bad he'd think he finally died and went to the fiery depths of hell. If he knew this was gonna be his punishment, he would've rethought his suicidal tendencies 💀

But anyway!! You working with him at the P.M, lets get to that.

Chuuya holds a ridiculous amount of loyalty to the mafia, and his work ethic definitely reflects said loyalty.

So he will get on you if you're not doing you're best, or just generally slacking off and neglecting the reports/paperwork that goes with working in the mafia. But like... He'll get on you super heavy while picking up like a third of your paperwork to do himself since he doesn't wanna see his little sibling stressed.

It.. Cancels out. He's an ass but you'll never forget about the fact he loves you lots.

Chuuya sticks his neck out for you a lot and isn't ashamed to let everyone know that yes he has a bias for his little sibling, the fuck are you gonna do about it?

But doesn't pull too many strings for you, y'know? The Mafia is a highly difficult job to have, and he can't have you going soft and lazy. (And this is all under the assumption you're not an executive)

But if you ARE an executive oh my god

You two would be working in the same office (either your own or Chuuya's, most likely the latter's) complaining about how much paperwork comes along with your position, probably while drinking wine too. Gossiping n shit 😭

Also, executive or not, EVERYONE knows to fear the Nakahara siblings.

Always reminds you when he's about to go out on a field mission. If you both aren't at the same place its via text, if you two are he's stopping by and ruffling your hair while telling you he's about to head out on a field assignment. It calms him down a lot plus it helps clear his head. He definitely expects you to do the same when you head out on missions, he needs to be in the know about that stuff and will get pretty upset if you don't.

God forbid you get hurt on the job. His reaction depends on how hurt you are.

If its just a few scrapes and bandages, he'll just chew you out about getting hurt and makes you give him a rundown about everything that happened on the mission, he's giving you his undivided attention.

If you're hurt sorta bad and put out of commission he's a muddy mixture of emotions he's not good at portraying.

He's scared because what if you got hurt worst than how much you already are, if the injuries were preventable he's upset with you for being so careless, plus he's angry with who ever caused you this pain.

Now... If you're in critical condition, Chuuya's literally seeing red. No one related to him is gonna be weak by any means, so its heavy stuff if you got hurt this bad.

His first instinct would be to get back at who ever hurt you if they're even still alive. But after Chuuya's after them, they're as good as dead. Afterwards, he's not leaving your side, he doesn't care if you're in a coma or what. He is not leaving you under any cicrumstances, this goes for when you're recovering too.

You two probably rarely get assigned as partners for missions, despite your relation.

I feel like Chuuya prefers going solo on missions ever since Dazai left the mafia, but if you seek him out to go on missions with you, he isn't all that against it. Always tells you "He's only doing this once" every mission because he's probably trying to build a reputation around him going solo but tbh he's coming with you whenever you ask 🙄

Its hard for him to say no to you a lot of the time, and honestly if you both start partnering on missions more than you're going solo Mori's gonna end up making you two official partners like he was with Dazai.. Chuuya's gonna be hella pissy about it, though.

Late nights researching about Arahabaki are.. Oddly personal. Its quiet and dark. The only things not making it a complete void is the illuminated screens of laptops the sound of clicks and scrolls. Maybe the occasional scribble of notes. But although little to no words are being said, its still an important time that just feels really vulnerable and personal, which is something thats usually difficult for Chuuya to display

...

He drags you to go shopping with him 💀 Chuuya lives by the rule "drip or drown" and gravity man REFUSES to drown

Dw you definitely dripped out too LMAO. If anything catches your eye he'll buy it for you knowing full well you can afford it yourself. Its useless to talk him out of it.

Shopping is probably how you both get your quality time outside of work, so even though Chuuya will semi-aggressively drag you out with him, its still a slightly pleasurable time 😭

Please don't get to arguing inside a peaceful designer store over whether or not some piece of apparel looks good or not, its gonna be hard not to but please...

People are looking at you two.

You're gonna get thrown out..

[itsclydebitches]

I got witcher!Ciri too! I kind wonder wha would happen if she died tho, dont wanna put geralt or her through that but I love angst lmfaoo. The game got really confusing at point cause I you have to learn a bunch of politics and how this world works and I didnt pay that much attention so I'm sure I'll get those moments in my second playthrough too I'm playing something in the hearts of stone thnig, it was lower level so I'm assuming you should play that first? a main quest with the asshole ghost in the wedding and wow I fucking hate it, it's so umcomfortable to watch geralt be this gross n weird lol, I'm not too familar when Shani either so watching her get mad when I get geralt to say he wouldnt do what the ghost is doing is so annoying lol, OH AND the ghost is a creepy fuck! shani babe you can do much much better than an asshole who talks about his dick and fucking "maidens" every other sentence!! Geralt really does get thrown into so much shit huh I'm tempted to read the books cause I do rly like the world and most- some characters but yeah reading about yen being yen wold be one of the things to stop me, what are some of the plot points that put you off? if you don't mind sharing And yeah I'd so be up for more content esp with ciri, would be cool to see them work together, even with how combat works in this game with npcs lmao

Woo witcher Ciri ending! :D If you enjoy putting yourself through pain I recommend looking up that other ending on YouTube because there are definitely some nice angst shots in the cut scenes. I watched and then promptly went, “I don’t need to play that for myself” lol. But yeah, hard agree on things getting confusing, especially towards the end. I completely missed stuff like the fact that my actions would actually impact this war, rather than the war simply being backdrop, or that Ciri’s powers were more than just the ability to teleport short distances. So by the time I was getting called on to murder kings and Avallach was taking us to totally different worlds, I had a very John Mulaney approach of, “This might as well happen. Things are already so goddamn weird.” Which, you know, really isn't the game's fault. It's what I get for jumping into the third game first and while I don't regret that at all, the story has absolutely deserved a second playthrough where I actually understand all the basic stuff I should have known going in.

Yeah, Hearts of Stone comes first. You can do any of the side quests you’d like from either DLC, but I’d recommend keeping Blood & Wine’s main storyline for the final push. But yeah, that ghost dude is, uh… something. I quite like the wedding on the whole—I really enjoy Shani, dancing is fun, O’Dimm is being a wonderfully evil dude—but yeah, dead dude is definitely a creep. Which is partly one of the things that turned me off from the books. It has the same ‘Guy trying to write women’ energy of the games but… worse. I’ve read a lot of excerpts over the years and so many of them turn me off. There are a ton of small things, like Triss importantly informing the witchers (who are all like 100+ years old??) about periods and that Ciri can’t train today because of hers (a moment that much of the fandom celebrates as... progressive?), or Triss and Yen getting super catty with one another over Geralt, to much bigger things like Ciri nearly getting raped/being involved in intimate acts with really questionable consent. A lot of the Witcher has a “This didn’t age well” vibe to it which, to be fair, isn’t entirely the fault of the author. The story is the product of 90’s Polish culture and, again, a man trying to write some pretty complex subjects from an arguably ignorant place, which makes much of the work eye-rolling for me at best, outright uncomfortable at worst. (Which I think is why I enjoy the games far more. I have agency in this questionable world, the ability to tailor it somewhat to my own beliefs and desires, which makes moments when that's taken away, like Geralt automatically commenting on how good Yen looks at a funeral, all the more frustrating). I obviously am not a Geralt/Yen fan, which sours a great deal of the plot. From what I got through the pacing felt like a slog and, more importantly, much seems to have been lost in the translation from Polish to English. (I continually hear about how amazing the dialogue is, but sadly that hasn’t come across in translation for me. Much of it is... awkward.) The parts I’ve heard about/read excerpts of that I’m most interested in—Geralt’s hanza—ends tragically and I’m… just not here for that right now. Which isn’t to say it’s badly written or anything, just that it’s not my personal cup of tea, especially nowadays with a pandemic and what all going on lol. I look at what I know of the series as a whole and go, “Do I really want to read five books filled with outdated representation for women, that old-school fantasy violence that turned me off GoT, with a super depressing ending, all wrapped up in an iffy translation and a style I don’t think does well in long-form storytelling? … Not really.”

Still loved most of the short stories and I’ve heard that many people liked the audio book versions when they couldn't get into the text, so I might give that a go someday. I’d prefer to actually have read all the source material for a fandom I’m spending so much time in, but I sadly just haven't had the urge yet. If you do read them, anon, you’ll have to tell me what you think. It’s becoming quite the divisive topic, especially as Netflix fans turn to the books, and—putting aside that everyone’s tastes will always differ—it’s interesting to hear not just whether someone had fallen in love with the books or not, but if they haven’t what about them prevented that. It's very much a case of one person's "That was awful" being another's "Are you kidding me? That's the best part!"

[shyanlibrary]

hello!!! what are your favorite fics??

Nonnie, what a question...

Let’s keep it short, top 10 under the cut:

1. The Chain by Lafayette1777

Rated: Not Rated (T) | Chapters: 6/6 | Complete | Word Count: 14,073

Summary: Do you not know how love works?

Shane and Ryan, in transition.

Commentary: Christ almighty, this will forever be my favorite fanfic in the entire world and I mean it. I’m someone who has been in many fandoms for more than 15 years now and let me tell you something, I have never felt so much as I have with this story. Because it’s just so incredible well written and the characters are just what drives everything in it! The imagery, the feeling of it, each dialogue, all of this fic is wonderful and I’m in love with it. PLEASE read it if you haven’t.

2.  can’t take you home to mother (that’s what i like about it) by redmaynes

Rated: E | Chapters: 7/8 | Ongoing | Word Count: 20428

Summary: “I still hate you, you know that?” Ryan gasped out after they finally broke for air, and he roughly shoved Shane back on the mattress to make quick work of the button of his jeans, and smirked when he heard Shane curse under his breath when he pulled down the zipper slowly, agonizingly.

“The feeling’s mutual, baby,” Shane said through gritted teeth.

“Don’t call me baby.”

Commentary: Fun fact: this was the first fic I read, and I did because I wanted to read smut and I was looking forward to know how this fandom expressed that kind of intimacy between these two, and I was hit by one of the most interesting scenarios put together for this kind of AU, good plot and great characterization. I adore this fic, I’ll go to hell and back for this fic. It’s wonderful and.. how to explain it? Just plain ol’ good, man.

3. Perfect Fit by moliuoli

Rated: E | One-shot | Complete | Word Count: Unkown

Summary: There’s a legend that says anyone able to take all of statue Shane’s cock will summon the god to the mortal realm. Given the statue’s excessive size, no one has ever succeeded to prove or disprove the story.Until Ryan that is.

Commentary: When it comes to original AUs and situations, this fandom never disappoints. Look at this fic in particular, it’s a fun exploration of college life and loneliness in the most freakin’ horny way and that’s why I loooove it and re-read it pretty often. My favorite from the author, too, and she’s a writer I really like. This fic is work of art, a classic in the fandom, just incredible.

4. Let the Sunshine Burn Your Eyes by YogurtTime

Rated: E | One-shot | Complete | Word Count: 6,577

Summary: An innocent man of taste and leisure, Ricky Goldsworth, just wants to check into his hotel room, but gets into an altercation with the concierge while a mysterious gentleman in expensive-looking clothes watches nearby.

Commentary: The only RG persona fic I like! I’m not ashamed to say I’ve read this fic more times than I have sat down to actually write something in years, lmao. Okay, so-- this masterpiece always puts me in a mood, in that mood that makes you grab a glass of wine, sip, stare into nothing and say “oh my”. I LOVE IT. I know I’m saying this about all fics in this list but lololol, it’s true. The writing in this is magical and transports you to another world, to the world the author wants you to see in this text and it makes you wonder everything about these characters and smile at the end. This, also-- has my favorite ending in a fic like this. Just. Oh my.

5. I would like that by Crimsonflowerz

Rated: T | One-shot | Complete | Word Count: 3,994

Summary: The third person who knew Ryan was trans was the ghost that haunted his apartment.

Commentary: This fic, oh-- I think about this fic and Shane in this fic a lot, actually. I always loved his character in this and I loved how much we knew of Ryan, his life and his feelings in it, because it let us wonder with him about Shane and his spirit, his life before being a ghost, and well-- you have to read to understand, this is one of the best fics in the fandom and it has one of the happiest and most hopeful endings and boy oh boy, am I a lover of happy ending. Read this beauty, I re-read it recently because my main fandom and its company broke my heart and my spirit last December, and this was the only thing that got me to stop crying over the way I was mocked by the male white creators of said main fandom. Life saving story.

6. ready if it happens with you by sarcasticfishes 

Rated: E | One-shot | Complete | Word Count:4,319

Summary: It’s not a thing. Ryan’s just a little… touch-starved. Intimacy-starved.

Shane passes behind him when he’s sitting at his desk, idly touches Ryan’s shoulder, thumb brushing the curve of his neck — and goosebumps erupt down the length of Ryan’s arms.

Commentary: A beauty! I said to the author, who is a good friend, that I was really honored this fic has my name as one of the persons it was dedicated to, because my man believe me when I say this is a fucking beauty and it’s one of my favorite smuts and getting together fics in the fandom. I’ve thought of that scene in the dark so many times, of the way it’s written and described, and every and each action is driven by pure feelings and it’s just so gorgeous. You gotta read it.

7. You Are on the Fastest Available Route by InkStainsOnMyHands

Rated: T | One-shot | Complete | Word Count: 2,362

Summary: "It’s in the light.“

[Based on the Local 58 YouTube Series]

Commentary: The night I read this fic, I couldn’t sleep. It made me feel uneasy, made me think of it for days, and I still think of it. Often find myself wanting to re-read it and I wish I could live again that first moment when I read it. Once, when I was in a meeting, I filled a page of my moleskine with the summary of this fic, and kept thinking of Ryan hudding Shane as the light came, of him looking up, of the road in front of them, the hints that something was amiss. What a genius story.

8. We Went To An Orgy And We Didn’t Have Sex (well…kind of…) by iris_rise

Rated: Not Rated (M) | Chapters: 4/? | Abandoned | Word Count: 11,045  

Summary: They met at a bar that afternoon before filming started. Liquid courage, Ryan had called it. “Or a surefire way to a pair o’ whiskey dicks,” Shane quipped back, giving him a playful smile, and Ryan knew he was totally screwed.ORShane and Ryan agree to film a one-off Buzzfeed documentary-type show, ‘We Went To An Orgy and We Didn’t Have Sex’, in which they attend a sex party and try to keep their hands off one another.

Commentary: I know what you guys are thinking about the title of this, but believe me when I say this fic is WONDERFUL. It’s such a gorgeous work with so much soul, and I would never really be reccing an unfinished work that is likely abandoned by now if it wasn’t THAT good. Soooo, let me tell you about the atmosphere this have, it has such a powerful spirit, it makes me cry that I will likely not know how it would have gone. Mother of GOD, this is perfect. Also one of my favorite interpretations of dom!Shane.

9. we are breathing river water by undeadapocalypse

Rated: M | One-shot | Complete | Word Count: 4,503

Summary:  Shane thought, through the kisses and the feeling of Ryan’s skin all over his, too much but not enough, I will not.

Between the light ending up off and the clumsy hands in a dark room, the floorboards that hide secrets despite not being theirs, he thought to himself, I will not fall in love with him.

The tabernacle reconstructed.He falls in love with him.or: a fic based off of “litany in which certain things are crossed out”

Commentary: Richard Siken is my favorite poet out there and when I found this fic and saw it was based on my favorite poem, I almost died right there. And to my delight, it was an excellent fic and even now, many reads later, it’s still an amazing fic with a beautiful ending that haunts me in the best of ways. Every part of this fic, the images of it, the parts were you can feel the poem in it, all of it, I love it with all my heart. Read it. It’s beautiful.

10.  I live alone in a paradise (that makes me think of two) by Ros_ora_sal

Rated: Not Rated (T) | Chapters: 4/4 | Complete | Word Count:  26,971

Summary: Ryan and Shane get stuck in a haunted house together.

Commentary: Oh, this fic. Oh this fic and its brutal plot filled with mystery, hope and even a few scares. Man, do I love this fic. Something I adore of this fandom is its more dark or weird stories, and this one hit me in the face with how good it was, really a gorgeous addition to our fandom. The story and the way its written has stayed with me ever since I read it, and I promise you it will stay with you too.

[snickiebear]

you haven't reblogged it yet but i here. 💖 What do you like most about your own writing? 💭 What is a headcanon you have about your own work? 🍰 Name one of your fave comfort fics (doesn’t have to be your all time fave).

SIRIUS!!!

💖 What do you like most about your own writing?

i really love my imagery and overall feel i get from my writing, its like coming home to me tbh. and like sometimes writing really poetic and From The Heart stuff, you know what im talkin bout, it just hits different.

💭 What is a headcanon you have about your own work?

okay so!!

- for WT&R, Sakura didn't know how to read or write until her met the sanin. there was no need to teach children soldiers how to so they didn't. the only reason why they taught her was because 1) Tsuna needed Sakura to read the text books 2Jiraiyaya needed her to be able to understand seals 3) they loved her, all three of them.

The only reason Kakashi knows how to is because he's from a clan and they start education earilar and more thoroughly.

- Sai is very very very smart. in one of the little oneshots in the third part of WT&R he relaizes how bad Sakura is at giving children gifts and its because she's never had a childhood. because of this, he also realizes that Sakura never had a childhood so that he could, so that all future children could.

and so, Sakura amoung the kohona 12 (though still like a story to them) is very much respected and they make sure everyone acts accordingly. every village, every person, will respect thossacrificeses made of this peaceful future.

i like this one because 1) shows how close Sakura and Sai are in this AU 2) shows actual friendships within the 12 and 3) it is another way that the God Eater and every other person who fought and died and lived in that war will live on throughout time

🍰 Name one of your fave comfort fics (doesn’t have to be your all time fave).

Masks is the fic i go back to all the time (its one of my favorites) and i literally know my fav lines and parts and everything LMAO

[radramblog]

Elder Dragon Highlander

 Commander is a format of Magic the Gathering that has become almost completely detached from its original premise. Much of what the format is is built upon the concept of Elder Dragon Highlander- 21 Commander damage is lethal because that’s 3 hits from an Elder Dragon, the slow grindy format built to accommodate the original 5’s heavy mana investment and limited effects.

But that was a long time ago, and the designers at WoTC have opted to attach the moniker of Elder Dragon to a number of additional cards. 21 total cards hold the name, 4 cycles of 5 apiece with one straggler at the back.

What is considered “elder” is largely to do with lore, I think, but due to its association with such iconic cards, it’s interesting to see how and what the label is attached to.

I’ll, uh….do cube something next week? I dunno. But this is the Elder Dragons.

 The original 5

The first elder dragon cycle is kind of iconic of Magic in general. Released in Legends, they were the first tricoloured cards in the entire game, were I believe the biggest and most expensive cards of the time, and all represented characters from the comics that I think just about everyone forgets existed.

They do not even remotely resemble modern design. Clunky is one thing, but the quintuplets are almost aberrant to what would be considered attractive Magic cards. A monstrous investment of mana in multiple colours that has a continuous upkeep of more mana, all for an arguably understatted flying creature with one extra ability. Chromium gets Rampage, a keyword that started in Legends, ended in Mirage, and doesn’t have reminder text despite being arguably confusing. Palladia-Mors gets Trample, making it arguably one of the best ones. Vaevictis Asmadi gets Firebreathing in all 3 of its colours, in case 8+3+3+3… wasn’t enough mana-shaped eggs in one basket for you. Arcades gets a bonus ability in toughness-breathing, to make up for it’s deliberately mediocre ability- the “oh cool I can use this with vigilance” eureka/fun brain moment quashed by its pointless limitation.

And then, of course, there’s Nicol Bolas. Somehow one of the game’s most iconic characters, in an art rendition that makes a powerful villain look like a gentle draconic geriatric. (EDITORS NOTE: still Rad here but I just now noticed this mf has a fucking dragon nipple, wtf?) I suppose Bolas becoming so well known was inevitable, if only because it was the only one of the most popular cycles with an actually cool and powerful ability. There are currently 210 more Bolas decks than any other member of this cycle, and that difference also happens to be twice what the other four have combined.

Bolas is arguably the only one that stood the test of time, the only one to ever show up independently of the other 4. I suppose we’ll see if any of the rest do the same, but I wouldn’t get my hopes up.

(Elder) Dragons of Tarkir

The titular Dragons of Tarkir’s third set (Dragons of Tarkir) were a set I was excited to see as the cards were being spoiled. The lore of the plane was interesting, with Magic stepping into a plot with time travel and finally showing us what Ugin looked like after almost 10 years of curiosity. The dragons that would become the Clan leaders had appeared previously in Fate Reforged, and the editions that we’d see as Elders- 10,000 years older and in some cases even wiser- presented a powerful and exciting cycle. Unlike with the Legends dragons, I’m pretty sure all of these saw play somewhere.

Ironically, though, I’m pretty sure these were deliberately tuned for Standard rather than the format named after their typeline. Even outside of Kolaghan’s line of text that….doesn’t do a whole lot in the format, Ojutai and Silumgar were pretty obviously built to be the finishers in the Esper Dragons deck that ran them, Atarka a clear top-end for Gruul Monsters (and, eventually, Eldrazi Ramp), and Dromoka a potential menace in Dromoka’s Command-backed Midrange lists. These cards are all quite powerful, but they’re built for a different kind of game.

That’s I suppose the biggest issue with the Dragons of Dragons of Tarkir, they were underwhelming. The set as a whole was fairly middling, though I did truly enjoy the draft format. I’m pretty sure the most played card in the set is fucking Collected Company, one I kind of despise, followed with Kolaghan’s Command which is just a traumatic experience for me. And while 3 of these 5 are seeing more play than their past counterparts, including Dragonlord Ojutai being literally 10 times more commonly seen than Soul of Winter, that difference is largely a matter of power (or lack thereof), the Mythic Dragonlords being obviously stronger than their Rare originals. The rare ones are arguably more fun, though, and that’s what matters to me.

 Legends…2! (aka core set 2019)

Part of the theme of Core Set 2019 was the story (read: retcon so the ending of War of the Spark makes more sense) of Bolas and Ugin in their youth, which meant that we got to get updated, modern designs of the original Elder Dragons (not Ugin tho lmao). And by Modern, I kind of mean postmodern, because we’re at the point where Commander cards start getting absurd All The Time.

Each of the Elder Dragons of Core 2019 (copyright WoTC 2018) have the benefits of updated design practices with 24 extra years of experience, as well as not having to have a million words on them for silly reasons like extra mana sacrifice triggers. Even Palladia-Mors, probably the weakest of them (and still pretty threatening!), gets to have flavour text hinting at a potential return (which hasn’t happened yet).

When you’re designing cards like these, though, it’s inevitable that some are going to be overshadowed by others. Baby Bolas, of course, was one of the flagship cards for the set, being a transforming Planeswalker with lots of abilities that wins the game in just the most classy way I’ve seen in a minute. And Arcades took a fun niche deck people liked and blew it wide open, making Defenders into one of the most disgusting Offensive decks in a minute.

But then there’s Chromium, a fairly powerful Voltron/Control finisher but not one that leads you in any particular direction. Vaevictis does lead in fun directions, but would then be completely dwarfed by the absurdity that is Lord Windgrace the same year and Korvold the next one.

Outside of a few, this cycle feels like it got kind of lost in the shuffle, and I think that’s not really that much a reflection of the cards (except maybe Palladia, the Naya Problem rearing its ugly head again), and more the greater issue with Magic as a whole just shitting out cards constantly faster than most can catch up.

Welcome to Strixhaven School of Magecraft and Sideboardary

Our final cycle is the new kids on the block, the Strixhaven dragons. I suppose one way to make the definitely not Hogwarts Houses (they’re colleges, Clearly) seem important is attach a giant Fuckoff Dragon next to them.

A thing I like a lot about Strixhaven as a set is how it was introducing a new Thing for each of the enemy colour pairs to do- Golgari Lifegain, Boros Graveyard, Izzet Spells But Big Ones Instead Also Treasures?. The set came with loads and loads of cards supporting each of these themes, and having Commander 2021 alongside it and associated with it means they’re well supported by that as well. But, and this is the important part, the Elder Dragons aren’t as overshadowed because they too are doing something different, even if its rather slight in some cases, on their own- but each supporting or being supported by the Dragon in question.

Beledros is a Big Mana Golgari commander (normally seen in Mono-Green or Gruul) whose huge life cost is assisted by the Lifegain cards Witherbloom got. Galazeth helps ramp into the giant spells associated with Prismari while also making the alternate discard into treasure option some of those spells have a lot better. Tanazir doubles the power of Quandrix’s Fractal tokens, and makes them even more huge when attacking due to then natively being 0/0s. And I don’t really know what the idea in Silverquill is other than “Politics”, but Shadrix looks fucking cool and probably plays really nicely. It’s just a really fucking solid cycle.

It’s not really possible to tell how these 5 are going to play out- Strixhaven is still the latest Standard Set to release at time of writing. But I wouldn’t be surprised if this is the most successful Elder Dragon cycle as a whole assuming you’re looking at, like, mean Decks.

And then there’s The Other One

As part of Modern Horizons 2, cards for a set of characters from alllll the way back from those Legends stories were created- a new Dakkon, a Geyadrone Dihada, and the Elder Dragon that showed up in their story- Piru.

Piru is, obviously, a reference to the original cycle of Elder Dragons, but in a Wedge colour rather than a Shard. And with an extra keyword, which is something I missed, because it makes all the difference. I had written this card off, until I realised that Lifelink triggered from the death trigger, and when this thing dies it isn’t too hard to gain dozens of life points. That’s a lot and combined with clearing the board it’s not too hard to get virtually unkillable. I love leaning into the downside from the original dragons by adding a powerful death trigger like this.

Piru released very recently, and already has 112 decks to her name. I wouldn’t be surprised if that plateaus, but it’s still rather promising. 8 mana is a lot in non-green colours, but I like Piru, and I’d be happy to see her see lots and lots of play going forward.

While 2021 has so far had more Elder Dragons than any other year, they’ve been a very promising cadre with a lot of interesting ideas going on. With that said, I’m not sure that I want the trend to continue, because the more they make (the more Elders in general, really), the less special they get. But for now at least, it looks like we’re finally getting to a good place for Elder Dragons. Only took us 27 years.

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #393

i’ve got a shitload of surveys backed up, so... get ready, aha.

Have you ever watched the show Bad Girls Club? No, but I adore the Falling In Reverse song, haha. Have you ever purposely made someone jealous? Not to my recollection, no. What kind of shampoo do you use? It's a Dove one for dandruff and I LOVE it. It makes my hair so silky, smells good, and just feels clean longer. Have you ever been told you were a good writer? Not to brag, but I've been told that my whole life. What name do you think is pretty for a girl? "Alessandra" will ALWAYS be my favorite name. If you had to name your daughter after a Disney princess, which one? Hm. Perhaps Jasmine, or maybe Aurora. Do you think telepathy is real? Nope. When you were little, did you ever think you would be a magician? Not seriously, no, but I was OBSESSED with those little magic kits you could get at the Scholastic book faire. What is your opinion on poetry? It's a beautiful way of expression, and I especially love the figurative approach to it. I truly think writing poetry can even help discover things about yourself. What, if any, TV shows do you have on DVD? I have seasons 1-4 of Meerkat Manor, and you can bet your ass I'll get Season 5 once that's available in that format! Would you rather go in a hot air balloon or go sky diving? Hot air balloon, probs. I'm too scared of sky diving. Homework–would you rather do it on a Friday or Sunday? Friday. I like to get it out of the way the day it's assigned. What cartoon character did you have a crush on as a kid? Ash Ketchum, haha. What video games have you beaten? Loads and loads. Who makes the most in your entire family? I actually don't know. Probably Ashley? She's a mammographer, along with other duties. If a cosmetology class was offered at your school, would you take it? No. Do you think plastic surgery is no big deal? If it's done safely and not overdone to the point it affects your health, you damn well go for it if it helps your self-confidence. Your favourite meal growing up? Spaghetti, or as I called it, "psghetti," haha. How many bedrooms in the house you live in? Three. What link was the closest person to you that’s died? If we're talking humans, Jason's mom. If you wanna include any living being, then absolutely my dog Teddy. Anything about your mum that annoys you? She is ALWAYS right. Doesn't matter what it is. What meal that your mum cooks is your favourite? I don't know. Have you ever tried caviar? Can you explain the taste to me? HELL no. What, in your opinion, will cause the end of the world? The universe itself is infinite. If we're talking Earth, completely eliminated, either a gamma ray or black hole. If your siblings are old enough, what do they do for work? I mentioned Ashley already, and Nicole is a social worker with children. I actually don't remember what my half-siblings do for work. Have you ever been jealous of your siblings? I've been envious of them for sure, absolutely. They're actually doing shit with their lives and seem to have themselves figured out. I gotta admit I'm jealous of how close Ash and Nicole are, too. I want to be the third person, but I'm just... not. We're so very different that it's hard to get as close as I want. Do you prefer a proper restaurant to a fast food place? Depends on what I'm feeling of course, but I think like most people, I have a more quality experience at sit-in restaurants. What is the biggest dream of your life? Photograph and come into physical contact with meerkats (whether they climb on me or I pet them, idc) at the KMP. I WILL cry. What is a country you’d never ever visit? Places like North Korea. Have you ever had any trouble paying your bills? I don't have bills. Do you think life should just hand things to you? No. Would you rather live off government benefits or earn your own money? I desperately want to earn my own money. What type of a survey do you skip altogether? I don't like bolding surveys. I like the opportunity to explain in normal ones like these. Do you get nervous before “meeting the parents”? Yep. Do you own a knife? Not any besides your ordinary kitchen knives. What song do you want played at your funeral? I have a few in mind. "Life is Beautiful" by Sixx A.M. and "Angels on the Moon" by Thriving Ivory probably top the list. Do people get shocked by how old you are? I don't know, but probably, given how dependent I am on my parents for like, everything. Do you have any features that people notice right away? As in a mole on your cheek, or a big nose, big teeth, etc? Apparently my lip ring. What's the last compliment you received? The lady that works with me in the TMS office liked my Umbreon shirt. What's the meanest insult you have received? Probably that I'm a martyr (and not in the good way). Have you ever fallen asleep with the last person you kissed? Yes. Does your best friend approve of the last person you kissed? They're the same person lmao. Do you have any friends with kids? Yes. I feel like most of my FB friends have kids. What was the last thing you spent your money on? I bought my niece her birthday present. Where did you first kiss the last person you kissed? My back porch. Does your favorite song remind you of anybody? Just America in general. Do you have a member of the opposite sex you’ve told everything to? Jason, pretty much. Do you want any tattoos? If yes, what? Oh hunny, I want LOADS. Are promises important to you? YES. Do NOT promise me shit if you're not planning to keep it for sure. If you’re a girl, do you have big hips? Too big? Well, for one, I'm overweight, so. But if you're talking bone structure and spacing or whatever, then no, I'd say they're average. Girls, do you think you look good in dresses or not? Who says only girls can wear dresses? But regardless, nope. Have you ever taken a pottery class before? No. Have you ever had a period in your life where you were on a major health kick and you were really picky about what you consumed? A few times. Is there anything that you’d never do for any amount of money? There's a good number of things. Do you know what your next injection will be? No. Does anyone call you darling? If so who? Sara sometimes. If you had to have a cartoon character tattooed to you what would it be? If I had to, maybe Pikachu? It'd be a nostalgia thing. You have to dye your hair two colours, what do you choose? Two colors at once? Maybe a pastel mix of pink and purple. Or black with orange highlights and layers? What a Halloween vibe. Ever had something stolen? If so what? Yeah; our basketball hoop was stolen from our yard when I was younger. Do you feel the water in a pool before you get in, or do you dive right in? I feel it. Have you ever touched a squirrel? No. What's better, candles or incense? Incense! When's the last time you’ve smelled a skunk? I'm actually unsure if I ever have. Have you ever used a Ouija board? No. Have you ever met anyone who claimed to be a witch? Yes. Does it annoy you when high-schoolers wear Elmo bookbags? Why the fuck would I care? Do you go along with prank-callers, or just hang up? I don’t even answer numbers I don’t know. Would you ever tattoo a lover’s name onto your body? No. Do you own any version of Guitar Hero? I have a lot, actually. Do you use mouthwash every single day? No. Have you ever eaten White Castle burgers? Only those you warm up in the microwave. We don't have the actual restaurant here. What’s the weirdest thing in your body that you can crack? Nothing weird. Do you like chocolate milk? Who doesn't? o: Do you know anyone with asthma? Yeah, my mom. Why aren’t you texting the last person you kissed? Because she's probably asleep, and we mainly chat on Discord now. Has someone ever called you at midnight on your birthday? Many years ago. Have you ever slept in the same bed as your friend? Yeah. Do you want to see somebody right now? Yes. Do you currently have feelings for anybody? Yes. When was the last time you changed in front of someone? I'm not sure; especially with how I feel about my body now, I avoid it like the plague. Realistically though, probably Mom, passing by or something. Who did you last fall asleep with? If you exclude my cat, Sara. Think back to the last person you held hands with, would you kiss them? That would be my niece Emerson, and I'd certainly kiss her head. Can you be your complete self around the person you like? She's the only person I feel 110% comfortable being my authentic self around. How many tattoos would you get? I want A LOT. Like, more than I'd keep track of. How many bracelets do you have on your wrists right now? None.

[smallblueandloud]

ooooooh i'd love to hear about the fsk twitter au and/or she survives!

YOU HIT ON THE TWO I’M PROBABLY MOST EXCITED ABOUT.

well like. okay i was excited about she survives and now i’m not sure about it so i’m just gonna let it flounder in my wips folder until one day i develop enough confidence to post it lmao.

anyway, the fsk twitter au is literally just an excuse for me to write the wish fulfillment of my dreams, which is queer people being queer and domestic online. i am stalking a lot of people on twitter right now and while i know it’s not healthy to overshare on the internet, and therefore i don’t necessarily think they should, it doesn’t mean that i am not craving it. therefore, fsk are celebrities (as are the rest of the SHIELD people) and they’re poly and out and everything is wonderful. i love them.

i haven’t written a lot of this story but it’s mostly because i haven’t had any ideas about the plot yet. but i’m enjoying just writing like... outsider pov fluff. it’s really healing.

Jemma Simmons (@jsimmons) tweeted: Fitz and Daisy have taken over the living room to watch Amok Time. I’m taking applications for new spouses.

Lance Hunter, Actor (@hunterhunter) retweeted and added: my time has come

daisy “that actor who doesn’t shut up about data harvesting” johnson (@daisyquake) retweeted and added: hey hold on hunter i thought you were gonna go for ME once jemma hit her final straw

Fitz (@justfitz) retweeted and added: stop texting during amok time

Fitz (@justfitz) retweeted and added: anyway, everyone knows @hunterhunter and i are getting married once you two drive me away with your disLIKE OF STAR TREK

also there’s some mackelena in there that i’m really happy about!

Mack (@a.mackenzie) tweeted: I love Elena so much but also this is the third time she’s chosen Manos: The Hands of Fate for movie night

Elena Rodriguez | Seven Cents S2 Streaming On Netflix Now! (@yoyorodriguez) retweeted and added: IT’S A WORK OF ART

Mack (@a.mackenzie) tweeted: [Screenshot of a Wikipedia quote reading “Manos remained obscure until 1993, when the television series Mystery Science Theater 3000 (MST3K), a show based on the premise of comedically mocking B movies, featured the film in an episode, helping it develop a cult reputation as one of the worst films ever made.”] .@yoyorodriguez Babe I’m begging you

(can you tell i don’t use twitter lmao)

and she survives is actually a star wars fic!! featuring wedge antilles and a random rebellion oc!! because i am nothing if not COMMITTED to my terrible ideas.

basically i was just thinking about how leia must be so symbolic, being the princess of a dead planet and the heir of the founder of the rebellion and the sister of the last jedi. and then i thought about how she withstands torture in episode iv, at age NINETEEN, and how she’s always angry all the time and how that must clash with the fact that she’s clearly a leader slash commander, even in the original trilogy (canon can whine all it wants), which means she’d be unable to go and actually physically fight most of the time. she’s too important of a strategic mind and a symbol to go and risk her own life.

and all of those feelings kind of meshed into the headcanon that the rebellion loves leia dearly and wants to protect her, and also they don’t want her to fall into enemy hands again, because she’d withstand torture and come out a martyr and the empire knows it. so instead they’d kill her and therefore kill half of the rebellion’s hope in a single strike. which means. in essence. several rebels have died to make sure leia doesn’t fall into enemy hands again.

i’ve cried about this multiple times if you can’t tell.

so i wrote like 1k of wedge antilles going up to a random rebel and warning them that leia’s personal guard needed to be made up of people who would be willing to die to keep her out of enemy hands and telling them that it was no problem, he understood if they couldn’t do it, but he was going to have to transfer them somewhere else.

i’m having Doubts about this because tbh i’m not sure if leia’s that much of a symbol in the ot? maybe in the st. but also i don’t want to write anything about the st lmao.

ANYWAY i’m still emo about this so i hold the eternal hope that i’ll finally get enough confidence to post this fic. here is a snippet. please validate me.

“No, it’s okay,” you say, remarkably calm for someone who just accepted death. “I can handle it. Keep me on the mission.”

Wedge stares into your eyes. “You’re sure?”

No judgement. Just confirmation.

“Yeah, I’m sure,” you say. “It’s okay. She’s the princess.”

You’re not from Alderaan, but that doesn’t matter. A few days ago you heard someone whisper that the death of Alderaan just untethered Leia from her singular planet, made her everyone’s princess. You kinda like that theory.

Leia Organa is twenty two and people whisper that she walks with the weight of the galaxy on her shoulders. Not just everyone’s hope for defeating the Empire - but for what she’ll do after the Rebellion wins. The one who will rebuild the Republic than most Rebels don’t even remember.

You can do this for her.

[merry-kuroo]

The Last Embers- A MHA Fanfic - Chapter One

Hello. This is my first MHA fanfic and its a AU. I hope y’all like it (or not. that’s cool too.) This is based off a idea I wrote about for my Intro to Creative Writing class almost four years ago and I thought it would be cool to apply this to MHA.

Summary: Less people in the world are being born with Quirks and those that have Quirks begin to lose them between the ages of 25-30. This has caused the decline of Pro Heroes and Villains. Those that graduated from Class A at U.A. have turned 25 and are beginning to witness the decline of their Quirks. How will they cope and how will it affect their relationships? Meanwhile, Izuku searches for the next successor of One For All, even when he's told its pointless... 

Chapter One: Love Like This; Kirishima & Kaminari Part I

Chapter Summary:  Kirishima wakes up one morning to find his Quirk has disappeared.

Read it on AO3 too...There’s some notes on the AU as well.

Enjoy! The chapter is below the cut :)

December 11

The first thing Kirishima Eijirou did when he woke up was activate his Quirk. His alarm would ring incessantly, then he’d sit up straight in bed and harden his arms and hands. Almost two months after his twenty-fifth birthday he hadn’t felt any different, but he made it a point to check just in case. He was still an active Pro Hero. He joined Amajiki Tamaki’s pro hero agency, when he started it three years ago. It was in the same area as Fat Gum’s agency and Kirishima had joined eagerly, thankful to be working with his senpai.

But there was the realization that he wouldn’t be a Pro Hero for long.

Bakugou had chastised him for not opening up his own hero agency instead. There wasn’t much time left for him. So, Kirishima had planned to open up his own as soon as possible and make sure his name was known before losing his Quirk. He was thankful to be ranked number eight on Japan’s Hero Billboard Chart last year with his other classmates.

This morning, when his alarm sounded, Kirishima didn’t automatically sit up in bed. He opened his eyes slowly, letting the sound of the alarm wash over him. The sun wasn’t filtering through the window like most mornings. He felt a sense of dread. Something wasn’t right.

Kirishima sat up in bed, turned off his alarm and stared at his hands. He tried to activate his Quirk.

Nothing happened. His slightly tanned skin remained still.

He waited a couple of minutes before trying again.

Nothing.

The realization didn’t hit him all at once. He leaned back until his head touched the wooden surface of his bed’s headboard. Kirishima thought back to the first day he activated his Quirk, and how surprised he was when he realized he cut himself. He thought back to how in middle school he became inspired by the Crimson Riot and his best friend, Ashido Mina. Bakugou and Kaminari flashed in his mind, from their practical exams to enjoying their youth. He remembered the little shock Kaminari gave him when they hugged, something Kirishima hadn’t felt for a long, long time.

Kirishima didn’t notice the hot tears that streamed down his cheeks. He reached for the cellphone on his nightstand. He had a couple of messages from Seto and Ashido, but he didn’t bother checking them. He went through his contacts and dialed a number.

“Hello?” A tired voice answered.

“Hey, Amajiki-senpai. Can I talk to you for a sec? I have some bad news.”

---- --- -- December 14

They were throwing a retirement party for him. Kirishima Eijirou was twenty-five years old, number eight on the Hero’s Billboard Chart, and he was retiring at age twenty-five. Amajiki had cried when Kirishima told him the news, and told him that it was unusual for Kirishima not to notice his Quirk was disappearing.

Kirishima had heard from other Pro Heroes about how there was a steady decline of their Quirks powers until they couldn’t even activate it. Kirishima had just used his Quirk the day before it disappeared and he hadn’t noticed anything unusual about it.

Well, everyone was different. The scientists studying the decline of Quirks in the human body constantly came out with new studies about the different ways Quirk declination could occur. Recently, they said there were a few people who admitted to losing their Quirk suddenly without warning. And despite the age range being from twenty-five to thirty, there were people younger than that who had lost their Quirks.

Before the party, Kirishima went to the park near his apartment. He sat on the bench and watched a few middle schoolers play soccer. He pulled his red scarf tighter. It was cold, but Kirishima didn’t mind. He had felt numb and empty the past three days, and the bitter cold was a reminder that he was still here.

Kirishima felt weird being out in public and no one recognized him. He returned his hair back to its natural state, black. It was no longer spiked up, instead falling to his shoulders. He wondered if Amajiki would recognize him when he arrived.

After telling Amajiki about the loss of his Quirk, Kirishima cried. It wasn’t manly at all, but he felt that he had the right to mourn his Pro Hero career and his Quirk. All his life Kirishima knew that he would lose his Quirk, but nothing could prepare for the moment it actually happened. Kirishima had come up with a weird analogy for it back in high school.

It was like death. Everyone dies and everyone knows that it will happen.

Then the person you love, your classmate, your parents die. You know it's going to happen and you’re not prepared? Why isn’t anyone actually prepared for when it happens? Is it just the shock when it happens unexpectedly? Maybe if everyone knew the date and time they would lose their Quirk or when a loved one died then the shock would disappear then.

Kaminari liked his analogy while Bakugou claimed he was thinking too much into it.  Kirishima noticed that Bakugou had looked bothered by it, but he never said anything to him about it.

Well, now was as good a time as any to tell his friends that he lost his Quirk. He was the second person in their class to lose it. Kirishima sent a text via group message about how he lost his quirk and that he was on the way to his retirement party.  And to make the mood light, he added a lot of “lol” and “lmao” (with extra o’s). He didn’t want to see everyone’s reactions just yet, so he put his phone on silent.

---- -- ---- Thirty minutes later, Kirishima arrived at Amajiki’s Pro Hero Agency. He poked his head in and found that no one was at the front. In fact, the agency was completely dark. “Hello? Anyone here?”

No answer. Kirishima assumed the party would be held in the meeting room. He walked to the meeting room, which was in the back of the agency. He knocked on the door but didn’t hear anything. Kirishima opened the door and jumped when two confetti poppers went off in his face.

“Surprise, Kirishima!” Ashido screamed.

The lights turned on and Kirishima’s UA classmates, Amajiki, the receptionists and interns were clapping for him. There were streamers and balloons around the room, and a three tiered chocolate cake was in the center of the room.

“Everyone!” Kirishima cried. He hated to be crying again, but he was so happy. “I just sent that message--How did you get here so fast?”

“Dumbass,” Bakugou said as he approached him. Izuku trailed along.

“Amajiki-senpai gave us a call. He wanted to surprise you and asked us to keep it a secret that we knew.” Izuku exclaimed.

“Do you know how surprised we were when we got that long message from you?” Uraraka laughed. “We were here setting up the whole time.”

“Sorry about that, Kirishima,” Amajiki said. “I thought you might want to see your friends.”

“No, thank you! Thank you very much!” Kirishima cried. “I’m so happy right now.”

“Speech! Speech!” Ashido called.

Everyone stood around Kirishima, waiting for him to make a speech. Kirishima hadn’t even thought about making a speech. What was one supposed to say when they lost their Quirk anyway?

“Uh,” Kirishima began. “First, thanks for coming out. I know how busy you must be.” Kirishima’s eyes scanned the crowd, looking for Kaminari.

He wasn’t there.

“It was a quite a shock to wake up a few days ago and find that my Quirk no longer worked. But even so, I’m thankful for my time at U.A. and the wonderful friends I made along the way. I was a Pro Hero for seven years. I accomplished my dream. Thank you for coming out today!”

Everyone clapped, then Kirishima was pulled into a multiple group hugs. Momo gave him a bouquet and Iida gave a small speech as well about how proud he was to be Kirishima’s classmate and friend. He talked to Todoroki, Izuku, Hagakure about their work. Sero and Tokoyami had given him some expensive wine.

The party was not as bad as Kirishima thought. A few of the interns cried and asked for pictures and autographs. It was the last time Kirishima would be the Red Riot, so he obliged. The chocolate cake Amajiki ordered was fantastic, and he was on his third slice when he noticed Bakugou leaning up against the wall by himself.

“Always the loner, huh?” Kirishima asked as he sauntered up to him.

“Shut up,” Bakugou said. It was light hearted. He lightly punched Kirishima in the arm. Both of them leaned against the wall and watched the party goers. “So, tell the truth.”

“Truth about what?”

“About losing your Quirk. How do you really feel?” There it was. A rare time where Bakugou was showing his true feelings. He had mellowed out slightly ever since graduation. He still wouldn’t hesitate to call someone a dumbass or yell at them, but it wasn’t as often. It still took Kirishima by surprise when he asked him about his feelings. The last time he did that was when Kaminari had left town three years ago.

“Honestly, it really sucks. I wish I had just a few more years. I think everyone at least wants to keep their Quirk until their thirty, but that isn’t the case for everyone. I’m glad I was born with a Quirk, but now I feel like I lost an important part of myself.” Kirishima picked up a piece of chocolate and plopped it into his mouth. “So, now I just need to readjust.”

“How are you going to do that?”

“I still want to save people. The fire department is having training sessions and classes. It’s still a hero type job,” Kirishima explained. He studied Bakugou’s expression. He seemed...solemn.

“Hey, is something--” Kirishima was cut off by Ashido yelling at him.

“Come on. We’re going to take a class picture!”

“What? But Jirou, and Kaminari aren’t here!” Kirishima protested.

“It’s fine. This isn’t the last time we’re going to meet up anyway. Come on!”

After taking pictures, eating more food, and playing a lively game of charades, the party ended. Kirishima bid goodbye to his classmates and they promised to meet again soon. He wished he could spend more time with them, but they still had to work, and many of them didn’t live in the city anymore. Bakugou told him that when Kaminari was back in the city, the three of them would go get drinks. Kirishima didn’t even have the heart to respond, opting to wave goodbye to his best friend.

“You don’t have to stay behind and help me clean,” Amajiki said as he folded a table cloth.

“No, it’s fine. Consider it my last job at the agency,” Kirishima laughed soundlessly.

“Hey,” Amajiki said. “Thank you, Red Riot. For everything.”

Before he could respond or burst into tears again, the door to the meeting room squeaked open. “Hello?” A singsong voice called out.

“Jirou! And Kaminari!” Kirishima exclaimed as his two former classmates walked in. Kirishima’s pulse jumped when he took in Kaminari. It had been three years since he had last seen him. His blond hair was now cut short, making him look more mature. He had grown taller and more muscular too. Kirishima stared at his left arm where dark ink sat on his skin. “What are you doing here?”

“We got Amajiki-senpai’s message about your retirement party! There was an issue with the shop, then our train was delayed. Wait, did we miss it?” Jirou asked, observing the other workers folding up the tables.

“Yeah, everyone left a while ago. I was helping clean up,” Kirishima answered.

There was a silence between the three of them. Kirishima felt tense and Kaminari wasn’t looking at him. Jirou looked back and forth between them, then she sighed.

“So, um, I’m going to help Amajiki-senpai clean up. You two should go catch up,” Jirou said. “Kirishima, your favorite cafe is right down the street, right? Kaminari told me about it.”

Kaminari blushed. “I didn’t say it was his favorite. We only ate there a couple of times.” Then Kaminari faced Kirishima. “But sure. We can go eat. My treat.”

“Sure.” Kirishima didn’t sound excited, but his heart was pounding heavily. How could he want Kaminari with him and also want him to be far away? Things were easier with Kaminari far away from him. The longing for him had become manageable over the past three years. Now, everything was back to zero.

Kirishima bid goodbye to Amajiki, and they shared one last brotherly hug. An intern gave Kirishima a box of the leftover chocolate cake and wished him luck in his future endeavors. Jirou hugged Kirishima, and he tensed up. She didn’t seem to notice. She congratulated him and told him that they would catch up soon.

“Hey, Kaminari, I’m going to find a hotel for us to stay at,” Jirou said.

“Okay, just text it to me,” Kaminari answered. He was already heading towards the door. Kirishima followed after him.

The two men made it outside. Kirishima shivered at the cold wind whipping his body. Kaminari held his hand out as tiny flecks of snow began to fall. Kaminari turned to him.

“Can we talk?” Kaminari said.

“Three years have gone by. Now, you want to talk,” Kirishima responded. He was being harsh, but he didn’t care right now.

“I know and I’m sorry. I got that message from you and--” Kaminari shook his head. “No. Let’s talk at the cafe. Remember? They have really good curry too.” Without waiting for a response, Kaminari headed towards the cafe.

And just like before, without hesitation, Kirishima followed after him.

[ncityzen]

the cat returns and ocean waves

What is the coolest adventure you’ve ever been on? i literally can’t think of a single adventure i’ve ever lived in my life now dsflkj it’s pretty boring, so that doesn’t happen often. once my family and i nearly died when we were at the azores islands on holiday, and my parents found it okay to jump on a boat with some local guide to go see whales, but the sea was horrible that day and the boat was minuscule so i could’ve drowned back then and i wouldn’t be writing this now. fun!!

Tell me about your best friends from high school: i was friendly with most people there since we’d known each other forever, but i had 2/3 friends that are still my best friends to this day:

the first one is the oldest (by 5 days) but the smallest. she’s always been amazing at art, but studies industrial engineering. she doesn’t look like it, but she’s probably the weirdest one of the bunch once you get to know her. she laughs like a bunny and cringes so hard during films she won’t stop shaking the arm of the victim next to her. she’s tried 1000 different hobbies, including chinese like 5 different times since it’s where her biological parents come from, and tried to convince one of us to join her every single one of those. she (probably deliberately) texts with all the typos in the world, and writes chunks of text very much comparable to jaemin’s ig captions. sadly likes benedict cumberbatch because “he always wears long coats”. but i love her.

i always feel like it’s a bit of fate that i’m best friends with the second one, since our great-grandfathers knew each other and were also on friendly terms. she’s kind of always tan and wears bracelets around her ankles. she’s athletic and played basketball for many many years. she’s a lot more sociable than me and always seems to know what’s going on, but we’ve somehow always stuck together. one of the chillest people i’ve met in my life, there’s very little moments i can think of where she wasn’t calm and collected. she’s super thoughtful and gives the best presents ever (i nearly cried once when she was my secret santa), you can always count on her to make you feel better. is somehow very into rap battles.

then we had another girl in our very small friend group lmao, but we went through a bit of high school drama and although i wasn’t really involved, i haven’t seen her since we graduated. but the third person can also be this one other girl who didn’t come to our school, but who we’ve always been good friends with, who’s super lovely and has the exact same taste in food as me (and probably taeyong)    

studio ghibli asks!!!