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Hold Him Down (pt. 1)
TW: Med Whump, Gratuitous Med Whump, Medical Restraints, Chemical Restraints, Noncon Touch, Referenced Noncon, Parker Destin, Institutionalized Slavery, Noncon Drugging, Conditioning, Referenced Food/Water Restriction, Referenced/Described STI testing, Referenced/Described Shock Collar, Whumper POV, literally over 4k words wtf, get leo a pet fish and warm hug when.
Notes: This is one of those things that I'm, as usual, not sure needs to or should exist, but I spent so much time writing it that I couldn't just NOT post it, sooo here it is. Parts 4-6 coming eventually. Takes place in the 12-ish hour span after Leo is prematurely returned from our best guy, Parker Destin. This may be one that I revisit and try to refine down the line.
✥ ✥ ✥
From behind a two-way mirror, Handler Otto Gray and an unfamiliar intake handler stand, arms crossed over their chests. They watch Leo quietly, relieved that, at least for now, the dust has settled.
His eyes finally closed, a few hours earlier, following a massive fight that ended in a sizable dose of Lorazepam. Even drugged, it took what felt like ages for him to settle down, and even longer for his body to finally go limp. Hours later, the salty tear-streaks are still visible on his cheeks.
The doctor asked them to wait on cleaning him up; in spite of the second handler’s objections, in spite of the apparently innate desire to put this unconscious boy in his place, the handler turned on his heels and left in a huff. Otto hesitated, sparing a quick glance at Leo. He wondered, briefly, how he had managed to fail so spectacularly, before dismissing the thought all together. Against his better judgment, he squeezed Leo’s hand briefly, then he checked to make sure the restraints were appropriately secured and exited. Today was sure to be a long day, sure to be even longer if they could not get a handle on whatever panic-induced psychosis Leo was clearly grappling with.
Somewhere in the middle of it all, shift change happened. The handler who had spent the evening scowling at Leo’s lifeless form clocked out, muttering a, “Good luck,” to his replacement. Otto stayed, though, with a quick glance at handler Nick Ford, according to his name tag, and a muttered greeting. Hopefully, he thinks, this one is better suited for this type of work than the last. The doctor comes up behind them, and the three stand in silence for a moment.
“He’s asleep?” the doctor asks, which is a question that could ordinarily be answered with a quick glance through a chart, but Leo has a notoriously unpredictable response to sedatives and that, if nothing else, has been noted numerously in his file.
Otto nods, his jaw locked. “I think so.”
Leo’s wrists are red, raw where each strap hugs them, but for the last few hours, they have been still. Mostly.
“For how long?” the doctor asks, thumbing through the notes from the night before. A colorful account of the events that led to this moment, which, although maybe not immediately helpful, might lend insight into the inner workings of Leo Evans.
“A couple hours,” Handler Ford supplies, and Otto is struck suddenly with a potent distaste for how this night has played out.
It’s not out of the ordinary, exactly, for a worker to require this level of support after a contract. He hoped, though, maybe naively, that Leo was more resilient than this.
He’s been drugged out of his mind, and as hard as he fought it, the drugs eventually dragged him under. To Otto’s understanding, it was only after several hours of trying to calm him down using other methods that he was eventually medicated, and, to Otto’s understanding, the doctor intends now to keep him drugged until he’s under control. He idly wonders if there’s a chance at modifying those plans. Leo is tough, sometimes damn near impossible to work with, but they had found a kind of balance when Otto was his handler. And he thinks, now, he can perhaps spare everyone some heartache if he can have a go at his former trainee.
Otto peers in closer to the window as Leo gasps, his wrists pulling once, lightly, at the straps.
“Alright,” the doctor says, at the same time that Leo’s eyes crack open. As Handler Ford reviews the notes with the Doctor, Otto studies Leo. He hadn’t been an easy trainee. He had been downright defiant at times, resistant to every standard training tool the DLS employed. Otto had been called in in his second month, after his primary handler was fired for, more or less, losing his patience with Leo one time too many, with Leo landing in the ICU. Even after that, success came in short, nearly unpredictable bursts.
When Leo had finally been cleared to take his first contract, that would usually have been the end of Otto’s time with him. But, at least in some of his most challenging successes, he liked to keep an eye on them, if not just to see how they did. He would tell you he did this to improve his own methods, and to help him understand the longer term implications of his work. That wouldn't be the whole truth, though.
Leo was one of the select few that Otto found himself keeping an eye on. He had gotten through his first contract easily, and Otto recalled the feeling of immense relief as he read through Ms. Smith’s post-contract interview. Leo had been put in a short term holding site and almost immediately secured his second contract. That one wasn’t set to terminate for three months still, so when Otto got the notification that Leo’s file was being updated last night, he called in some favors with the intake department.
He stands here now, mostly frustrated, a little bit confused, and perhaps, maybe slightly sympathetic. Simmering beneath all that is anger, misplaced but a constant undertone that, he worries, may drive some of his decisions today. He buries it as deeply as he can. It serves neither him nor Leo.
Leo blinks hard toward the ceiling, but seems to clock his circumstances quickly. His head turns toward the mirror and for a moment, Otto thinks Leo can see him, right through him, right into the place Leo used to occasionally access and attempt to exploit.
Otto stares at his eyes, red, heavy, and unfocused, and wills Leo to remain calm. Leo swallows, and pulls again against the restraints.
Stop, Otto silently commands. But he doesn’t. Of course, he wouldn’t.
“What are the odds he’ll take it on his own?” Otto hears from next to him.
“What?” Otto responds, shifting his focus.
“The meds?” Handler Ford says as he holds up a small cup of pills in one hand, a syringe filled with an off-white liquid in the other.
“Oh,” Otto responds. The odds, he thinks, are nonexistent. The good news is this isn’t explicitly his problem anymore.
“Any pointers?” Handler Ford asks then. At Otto’s look, he says, “You worked with him, right?”
Otto nods, but doesn’t offer any pointer. Handler Ford stares at him intently, so, out of some misplaced desire to prove that he is not, in fact, completely incompetent with his trainees, he says, “A long time ago. I did his initial training after his first handler got canned.”
“What for?” Ford asks. He’s stalling, Otto thinks.
“Assault,” Otto supplies. He inclines his head toward the room, and turns away from Handler Ford, re-orienting himself toward the window.
“Wish me luck?”
“Good Luck,” Otto says, not unkindly, as the handler disappears behind the door. Moments later, he is in Leo’s room.
Leo’s demeanor immediately shifts, from alarmed and fighting to gain function to panicked, but he stills, he swallows, he forces his eyes on the handler, and takes a breath. Good boy, Otto thinks.
He’s whispering something, but Otto can’t make out the words. He thinks he’s heard Parker’s name, and Handler Ford shakes his head.
Leo nods, then, and takes one of those deep, shuddering breaths that usually mean he’s on the edge of some big feelings. Otto, once more, leans closer to the window.
Handler Ford begins listing out the things he needs Leo to do this morning, and Leo’s brow creases as he takes it in, nodding after each item, but seemingly oblivious to the actual requests.
Inside the observation room, the doctor joins Otto.
“Do you know what happened?” Otto asks the doctor. Otto, immediately realizing he could be asking any number of things, clarifies, “That led to this. He didn’t have an issue after his first contract.”
“Sometimes they get freaked out after spending some time with a particularly cozy buyer,” he replies.
Otto nods.
In the room, Handler Ford’s hand is on Leo’s neck, pressing under the collar. Leo stays still, but Otto can see the fear in his eyes, behind layers and layers of grief. It’s odd, seeing him like this.
“You didn’t last too long, did you?” Handler Ford is saying, dripping condescension, as Leo swallows, holding in a fresh wave of tears.
✥ ✥ ✥
“It’s nothing personal, Leo.” Parker’s driver waits for Leo just beyond the threshold. In his hand, Parker holds out a DLS-issued bag.
Leo nods.
Parker grabs his face between his hands and presses his lips to Leo’s forehead. “You have to understand I didn’t plan for this,” he’s saying, but Leo’s ears are ringing. “I would have waited to take on a worker if I had any inclination I would be called away.” His words are kind, Leo thinks, but there’s almost a note of condescension under them.
Leo feels a sort of emptiness spreading throughout him, a cold void that precedes what he could only describe as terror. For what’s next. For losing this thing, that he isn’t sure he should want, but he wants, so desperately. He clings to it.
“Parker, I– I can,” Leo starts, taking a step back. He can, what? fix this? do better? be better? “Please don’t do this…”
Parker’s thumbs glide across Leo’s cheeks.
“I thought they beat that out of you,” Parker says, his lips pulled into a half-smile. Leo falters, the words he has prepared are completely knocked out of him.
“I– I’m sorry,” is all he can now formulate. He can feel his circumstances changing as every second passes. He’s going to be sick. The feeling of bile rising wars against the knowledge that if he is sick at this moment, it will be unforgivable.
Parker’s hands drift down to Leo’s shoulders and he pulls him into a half-hug, pressing his forehead against Leo’s.
“Don’t worry about it,” Parker says. He wants to say more, Leo thinks.
Instead, Parker uses the grip he has on Leo’s shoulder to push him away and rakes his eyes slowly over Leo, from his head to his toes. He smiles and grabs the collar of Leo’s shirt, poking out from under a deep blue sweater. It’s Parker’s favorite.
He inclines his head briefly toward the door and Leo counts every breath he takes.
“They said not to send your books and clothes and things,” Parker explains as he pulls open the front door. “It’ll just go to waste. I can donate it, if you’d like?”
And Leo, in that moment, hesitates. Can he ask Parker to keep it, for when he gets back from his trip? Maybe, he thinks. Maybe Parker hasn’t considered that Leo could stay in the house and look after it, and he doesn’t need to send him away.
And then it occurs to Leo that maybe Parker is using this time to help figure out the gaps in his training, because they’ve been butting heads lately, and if that’s the case, he wants to tell Parker that he will take this time seriously, and will be better suited to be what Parker needs him to be when he returns.
Leo opens his mouth to say this, to say any of it, even just to tell Parker that he will try harder when he gets back from his trip.
But the panic wraps itself around Leo’s throat, and Leo says nothing.
✥ ✥ ✥
“Are you ready to behave?” The words distort around the edges and Leo blinks hard, willing himself to focus.
This handler, Leo thinks, is unfamiliar to him. There is a fuzziness to both his vision and his thoughts, compounded by blurry memories of the night before. The handler is standing just outside of his line of sight, offering terse reprimands each time he fails to respond. He is trying, though. He wants to tell them he’s trying, but his tongue feels too thick and his voice won’t work.
There’s an added danger that Leo tries not to acknowledge, even silently. They’ve put a training collar on him, but they haven’t gone so far as to shock the world into focus. Even if his limbs didn’t weigh a thousand pounds, he would not be able to lift them. Thick canvas straps wound tightly around each wrist and ankle keep him in place, and Leo blinks at the unexpected wave of terror: these people can and will hurt him with no regard for the fact that he is wholly unable to protect himself.
The drugs help him accept these facts, but do not help him to forget them.
Memories of the night before claw their way to the surface. Of the sound of his own screaming, of gloved hands pinning him down, of his clothing being pulled off of his body. Of Parker's favorite sweater, which he held tightly to his chest, as it was ripped from his arms. He flinches at the memory of himself, just [some?] hours earlier, as he begged them to let him keep it, as a needle digs its way deep into his thigh. The darkness was quick to swallow him up after that.
And then there are other memories, too, from later in the night. Distorted flashes of the handlers coming to visit him, of cold hands pulling off the thin blanket that had been draped over him. He wondered if the drugs might ease the pain. When they didn’t, he allowed himself a moment of relief in the hope that this might all just be written off as a drug-induced nightmare in the light of day.
And now, the drugs fading, and the light of day doing nothing to erase ache deep inside of him, he swallows, blinking slowly, and longs only for the reprieve that unconsciousness may bring. That maybe they will drug him again, before they touch him again. His stomach turns over, and he draws his focus to the lights on the ceiling.
“He’s lost some weight,” he hears the doctor say, but they aren’t speaking to him, so he closes his eyes and taps each finger on the pad beneath him, just to see if he can feel them all.
“His buyer kept him hungry,” the handler replies. He can, he thinks, feel them all. “My understanding is he kept him on a pretty strict eating plan.”
Leo recoils, hearing Parker’s voice in his head. The DLS has asked that you start out on a kind of strict meal plan for a little bit. He blinks back tears at the unwelcome memories. Of Parker, event after event, selecting everything he ate, everything he touched. Of the imperceptible nod Parker would give him when he reached for something at the dinner table. Or the terse shake of his head when he moved to something unacceptable.
Leo wants to tell these men that Parker didn’t keep him hungry. That he was just enacting the plan he had been given.
“I’ll need a copy of it,” the doctor responds, and Leo squeezes his eyes shut, forcing his mind blank.
“It’s in his file,” the handler says. Leo’s ears ring.
“Good.” The doctor presses his hands fingers into the back of Leo’s neck, the collar momentarily tightening as the fingers explore under it. “He’s dehydrated,” he says, and Leo can picture the handler typing his notes. “Are you going to tell me the buyer restricted his water intake too?”
From somewhere far away, the handler laughs, and Leo’s expression tightens, momentarily stunned by the mockery.
“It’s alright,” he thinks he hears, but the voices are so far away now. He doesn’t know that he’s crying until he feels a thumb wiping at his cheek, and Leo sucks in a breath. “You’re alright.”
The world stands still for what could be seconds or minutes or longer. When the doctor’s hand finally migrates upward, and a light is shined into each of Leo’s eyes, he is momentarily blinded, but immediately aware that he has lost time.
The doctor’s fingers, inches from his face, snap once. “Hi, Leo,” he says simply. And then, “I’m Dr. Grant. Are you with me?”
Leo swallows, which hurts, and other memories slide to the surface of the night before. He tries to nod. The movement makes his head pound. “Yes,” he whispers, but based on the doctor’s– what was his name?– grimace, he doesn’t think it came out right.
The doctor sighs and seemingly gives up on Leo’s active participation, instead pulling the blanket down to Leo’s waist and putting a stethoscope to Leo’s chest. It’s nothing, Leo thinks, but it’s never just this. He closes his eyes again and begins counting in his head. Every so often, he forgets where he left off, and he starts over.
The doctor explains what he’s doing as he works, and Leo wonders idly if it’s for his benefit or for some other reason. To pass the time, and maybe to distract himself, Leo imagines a new doctor in the adjacent observation room, learning this trade. He wonders if it’s a good doctor or a bad doctor, and opens his eyes just enough to glance toward the mirror, to see if he can spot him back there. There are no good doctors here, he decides, and starts counting again.
The doctor looks at Leo’s wrists and describes them to the handler, who writes it all down. He examines Leo’s arms and his shoulders and his chest and his stomach as he searches for signs that Parker hurt him beyond what would be considered reasonable, which he didn’t, Leo wants to say, and that Parker will come back for him after his trip, and that he needs to be ready to go home. Then he starts counting again, because the idea of telling this man that Parker will come back for him will be met with laughter, and Leo doesn’t know if he can handle it. He’s pretty sure he can’t.
Fingers prod at Leo’s stomach and he can’t suppress the accompanying flinch, and as the drugs start to wear thin, he feels himself less and less able to accept what is being done to him.
“Alright, Leo,” the doctor says, and Leo opens his eyes and is met with mostly, he thinks, concern.
“I’ll be back.” The doctor shoots the handler a look, and Leo wants to close his eyes again, but as the handler approaches, Leo knows, acutely, that it’s a bad idea.
“Are you going to cause a scene?” the handler asks, before lifting the blanket from Leo’s lap. Leo shrinks back, an instant passing in which his entire body goes rigid, but shakes his head ‘no.’ He hopes it’s enough.
He holds his breath, waiting for it to be over, or, waiting for it to start, and feels the handler’s eyes sliding down his body.
He thinks he might be shaking, but he isn’t sure.
The doctor returns a moment later, and after a quick assessment of how things have evolved, issues a quick but gentle, “It’s alright.” It’s not, though, and Leo locks his jaw to keep from crying. He wants to ask if he can close his eyes again. Sometimes they would let him, when things were about to get really bad, in initial training. Sometimes, if he asked clearly, and if he caught them on a good day, they would let him.
“No wonder he was returned,” the handler says, leaning back against the wall.
“Can I close my eyes?” he whispers then, before he can catch the humor in the handler’s expression. The doctor looks at him once, and nods. Leo doesn’t hesitate to clamp his eyes shut, unwilling to chance opening them at all, maybe ever, and instead continues counting in his head.
“Continue working on your empathy,” the doctor says evenly, but Leo is pretty sure he isn’t speaking to him so he works on breathing and counting and nothing else.
He tries to block out the words. This is another moment in training, and it too will end eventually.
“They put him through hell in training. He has a right to be mistrustful.” And then, to Leo, he says, “I’m going to give you something to help balance you out,” and his touch disappears. “Just hang tight, Leo.”
Without warning, a hand clamps around his neck, pinning him in place. His eyes fly open, his arms pull instinctively against the restraints, as the tip of a syringe is pushed past his teeth and to the back of his throat.
He gags, his head knocking back against the thin pillow, but the handler’s grip is merciless, and in the next instant, a thick, bitter liquid is sliding down his throat. Tears well in his eyes, and he would swear the culprit was simply the bitterness of the medicine.
It’s mistaken for something else, though, and the handler releases him as the doctor runs a hand through his hair and says, “You’re alright.”
Leo’s shaking harder now, and his fingers grip into the pad he lays on and he urges himself to still. His chest aches as he tries to catch his breath, the taste of the medicine still heavy on his tongue. But still, almost immediately, he can feel his body lightening, the tension pulling back until the shaking eases, and the doctor nods, and approaches. Leo can’t feel the fear he knows he should feel.
He can feel nothing.
Even with the memories of the night before, even with the doctor and the handler so close to him, he can breathe again.
Still, Leo can’t contain the subconscious jerk of his body as a flash of sharp pain shoots through him. The doctor issues an apology, along with a soft, “almost done,” and turns the swab, over and over, as Leo’s legs fight against the hands that hold them in place. He tries to find a place in his mind to retreat into, but he hasn’t been there in months, if not longer, and in that moment, it offers no reprieve. He thinks he cries out, locking his teeth and pressing his head back into the pillow as hard as he can to distract himself from what goes on lower. When the doctor is finished, he wipes Leo down and drapes the blanket over his lap.
What he doesn’t say is ‘Good, Leo,’ because they would both know it to be untrue.
Still, in the next breath, the restraints are being unbuckled, and Leo is lifted at his shoulders until he is sitting, and his wrists are being examined, and there is a hand rubbing his back. He blinks slowly, willing the room back into focus, and he can hear voices but he isn’t able to follow their conversation.
“It doesn’t need to be this hard,” he thinks the handler is saying, and even though his head is hung low and his shoulders are scrunched to make him as small as possible, in his peripherals he can see the doctor shooting the handler a sharp look. “What?” he bites back. “It’s true.”
“Alright, Leo,” the doctor says then, ignoring the handler entirely. Leo keeps his eyes locked on the ground and he takes the blanket in a white-knuckled grip.
The doctor lets him catch his breath, rubbing his back every few seconds. Leo thinks he’s using it to get a read on his heart rate, but he doesn’t care just then. The doctor explains what’s next, and moves to ease Leo onto his side. Leo, for his part, cooperates, lowering himself slowly, watching as his fingers shake. He wraps his arms so tightly around his stomach he think he might leave bruises, but when the doctor touches him, he doesn’t flinch.
“There’s some bruising,” the doctor says neutrally, but Leo can’t look at the handler to see if he types it. It could be from the handlers, or it could be from Parker’s friends the night before. Leo chokes on his next breath, and in spite of the drugs, he can feel the panic rising.
“Leo?” the doctor says. “Are you doing alright?”
The handler takes a step forward.
“I don’t consent to this,” Leo whispers, so softly he isn’t sure anyone hears him. The look the handler levels on him is scathing. “I–I kn…know it doesn’t… I know it doesn’t matter.” His voice is soft, slurred around the edges, but clear enough. “But I… I j-just– I want to make sure you know.”
The doctor says nothing, and the handler frowns. Leo wants to ask him to type it into his chart, but the doctor moves behind him, and Leo’s vision is suddenly and immediately blurred by his tears.
By the time they finish, by the time the doctor drapes the blanket over his hips, letting his hand rest on Leo’s head briefly before retreating, Leo’s body is wracked with sobs. They leave him to calm himself down, and he finds himself, for a moment, grateful for the simple mercy.
But he cannot stop crying, as he stares into the mirror and thinks of all he’s lost. Of what, in spite of what he tried to convince himself he could have, he will never have. Of Parker, laughing with his friends as he picks out a new worker. Of the handler, and all those that came before him, smiling as they hurt him. The door opens with no warning and a familiar voice, a voice warm enough to burn Leo’s entire world down, issues a commanding, clear, “Stop this, Leo.”
And almost instantly, Leo stops.
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#Med Whump#Gratuitous Med Whump#Medical Restraints#Chemical Restraints#Noncon Touch#Referenced Noncon#Parker Destin#Institutionalized Slavery#Noncon Drugging#Conditioning#Referenced Food/Water Restriction#Referenced/Described STI testing#Referenced/Described Shock Collar#Whumper POV#literally over 4k words wtf#get leo a pet fish and warm hug when?
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What are your thoughts on how much time Sam’s soul spent in The Cage? If we go by established time lines in the show, 18 months = approx 180 years. But Lucifer is an arch angel and we know angels can manipulate time so I think it could have been longer, or least made to feel longer. I also believe that Sam would have been fluent in Enochian after spending that much time with Lucifer and Micheal. Thank you for answering if you have time! And I hope you enjoy and holiday time you have :)
welp - you did it.
you asked a question i’ve been thinking about for over a decade and unleashed the full fury of my brainworms in action. this is the type of meta i expect like 4 people total to be interested in, but i’m going to spend days working on because I Have Thoughts.
the short answer: somewhere between 180 - 5000 years, with my personal headcanon landing just over 700 years, or 1400 for maximum whump.
The behemoth long answer is under a cut because long and math and meta. Skip to the end if you just want the math. The tl;dr is that SPN canon implies that hell has layers and that time distorts more the deeper that you go, and we can build an equation for that distortion and get to basically whatever number suits our purposes depending on what assumptions we make going in.
Time Distortion in Hell
The length of time Sam’s soul felt/experienced the cage is a function of two factors: how long he spent there in earth terms, and the degree of temporal distortion hell creates.
The first piece is easy if we assume Sam’s soul spent 18 months in the cage* (footnotes at the end).
The second piece... Dean spent 4 months dead (time in earth terms) which was 40 years on the rack in terms of his experience/perception. If we take this assumption that 1 month = 1 decade, we get to use some very simple math to say that Sam spent 180 years in the cage.
But.
I’ve always personally interpreted Hell’s time distortion to run a bit different than a static 1 month = 1 decade. This headcanon derives from some hints in canon (or at least, this headcanon is not actively contradicted by moments in canon) and from other pieces of media.
I believe that the deeper you go into hell, the greater the temporal distortion is.
This is basically like the move Inception, I’m not even gonna try to pretend otherwise. There, the deeper you go into the dream within a dream, the more time dilation there is. It makes sense to me that SPN’s Hell canon works the same for several reasons.
For starters, when Sam's wall is breaking in s6, he has flashbacks where 2-3 minutes is equated with what feels like a week in the cage (episode 6x14). We can take this at perfect face value (meaning that Sam’s soul experienced about 5000 years in the Cage). Or we can interpret this to be a function of the episode he is experiencing, where temporal dilation is exaggerated because of the nature of his flashback, or we can say he is speaking in hyperbole.
I think it makes sense for the truth to be somewhere in the middle - Sam is speaking off the cuff, not entirely literal or exact about how long those 2-3 minutes felt like, but nonetheless honestly that they felt like days, felt much longer than our formula of 1 month = 1 decade allows. And I take that as a realistic reflection of his time spent in the pit.
Another, and far more overt piece of evidence comes in Season 11 when Sam visits ‘the Cage’. In 11x09 (O Brother Where Art Thou), we see Rowena, Crowley and Sam in Hell whereas Dean is on Earth, and there appears to be little to no temporal distortion occurring between the events below and the events above. This remains true in the following episode (11x10, the Devil in the Details) when Crowley phones Dean and when Dean comes down to join them in Hell (and Cas as well shortly after).
So - what gives? Is there temporal distortion occurring in Hell or not? Did they retcon that, forget about it, what?
Well, Crowley explicitly refers to this area of Hell as ‘Limbo’, which brings us to an understanding of Hell’s temporal distortion through the lens of the circles presented in Dante’s Inferno.
Circles of Hell
It’s fair and frustrating to say that canon doesn’t give us much in the way of understanding the structure and hierarchies of Hell. That gives us a lot of leeway, but I like to anchor my headcanons to canon if and when I can.
Thankfully, there is at least some reason to believe that Hell in this universe is structured at least somewhat similarly to Hell in other popular works of fiction that derive their conceptions of it from Dante’s Inferno (which itself is the popular mainstream view of hell that even a lot of Christian/Catholics have adopted, often without realizing at this point).
Dante’s Inferno provides a view of hell that has 9 circles, or layers, each one deeper into Hell than the last. SPN implies the same.
We get this from the use of Limbo, as stated above, since this is the term in the Inferno for the first circle. Crowley refers to Limbo as the “furthest reaches” of Hell, whereas in Dante’s Inferno, it’s the top layer. SPN plays fast and loose with what it takes vs. leaves from real-world mythos, but I take this to mean that “far” or “furthest” not in the sense of depth, but as a place which may be vast and largely empty, and which few demons can enter (since, as per the Inferno, it’s not a place where guilty souls actually end up, so possibly has quite restricted access to demons).
We also get evidence of these circles from Word of God through Sera Gamble, who has apparently said that the Cage is “At the bottom of the lowest depths of the ninth circle of the worst bit of Hell.” That’s pure Dante’s Inferno, ba-bey. (/mcelroy voice)
More evidence comes from Season 8 when Sam rescues Bobby’s soul from Hell, since he goes through Purgatory as a sort of back door to Hell, being told that Purgatory is “Hell adjacent”, which is true as well in the Inferno.
Another within-canon indirect hint of this is the association between Lucifer and ice. Dante’s Inferno keeps that the ninth circle of Hell, reserved for treachery, is a large frozen lake. And in the Inferno and in SPN canon, this is where the Devil is kept, in the Center of Hell, in the deepest frozen depths of the pit, the frozen lake in the ninth circle.
Also remembering that in early seasons, Lucifer and his Cage were buried so deep in Hell that most demons weren’t sure if he even existed. His existence was a matter of faith, no different than humans believing in God, according to 3x04 (Sin City).
Based on all this, I think it’s perfectly reasonable to surmise that Hell is vast, but potentially its vastness manifesting in the way in which it is layered, and that there are regions, planes, or depths that most demons do not or cannot tread to.
But okay, even if you’re on board so far, why do I believe that time works differently at different layers? And what circles have we seen in canon?
Situating Each Circle
My fundamental argument here is that temporal distortion in Hell is more extreme at the deeper depths, in a mathematically determinable way.
If we accept that Hell has nine circles (or planes or layers), then we can assume that we’ve seen three - probably five - of them. There is Limbo, as per season 11 and stated above, in which there seems to be little to no time dilation. This makes some sense if we accept that it’s the surface-most plane*, the first circle.
We have also established what’s in the ninth circle, titled Treachery, which is the Center of Hell and The Cage. Given its depth and the lines from season 3 Sin City, we can assume that, much like Limbo, this is an off-limits zone for most demons. If we accept my argument that times moves differently at the different layers, this is where time distortion - really, time dilation - should be the most extreme. It is the furthest removed from the material plane and the deepest well (do not call it a gravity well do not call it a gravity well do not call it a - )*, dilating time and everything around it at its depths.
In between, we have seen The Rack (where Dean was tortured), we have the Throne (where Rowena sat and kept court, since many of Crowley’s ruling scenes are implied to be on the surface rather than in Hell proper, although any of Crowley’s ruling scenes would be on this same level, I imagine), we have The Dungeon (from which Sam rescued Bobby’s soul as part of the Trials), and we have the glimpse we caught of how Crowley restructured the place into endless lines as a method of torment. There’s also the space where Lilith’s horn is kept, as per the Belphegor and Cas scenes in the early episodes of Season 15. I take that to be the same level as the Throne level, since it seems to be where ruling demons would both preside and reside.
Based on the seeming lack of time distortion we tend to see (in late seasons...) when we get scenes relating the Throne level, my headcanon is that this is the second circle of Hell (Lust). In the Inferno, incoming souls are judged here and then sent to which circle their sins have them belong, so I think it’s at least somewhat fitting for this to be where the Throne is. Keeping it closer to the surface world / material plane also has some advantages if doing so minimizes time distortion, since keeping closer time with Earth allows easier monitoring of Earth and tracking of things like deals etc. It also means that higher ranking aka more powerful demons who preside here are closer to Gates of Hell and therefore have less far to travel when slipping out and onto Earth.
In contrast, I think that The Rack is pretty damn deep. There is a lot of time distortion going on to get to 1 month = 1 decade (especially if we allow that a very small amount of dilation is happening at the topmost circles, even including Limbo). This makes sense to me in that The Rack is a place of exceeding misery and horror, literally the center of Hell’s most violent and excruciating tortures.
For that reason, I place The Rack as circle seven, aptly titled Violence. This is not to be confused with the sin of Wrath, which is actually the fifth circle. Rather, the seventh circle (to quote wikipedia at least), “houses the violent”. What better way to re-interpret that in the world of SPN than that circle hosting the torturers and their tortured? Within the seventh circle are those who committed violence against neighbors, against self, and against God. What better place for someone who sold his own soul (violence against self and against God), who killed?
Of course I don’t think it’s so straightforward that violent souls get sent to The Rack. I think any damned soul can be called there for a torture session. But Dean spent his entire time in Hell on The Rack, and that can’t be standard. Bobby spent plenty of his time in hell in a cell, as per 8x19 (Taxi Driver), and demons come here to torture him.
I don’t think it’s a huge leap for me to infer that Dean was special and spent his entire time on The Rack because they were so determined to use him to break the First Seal, and that most damned souls only do short stints on there, either due to limited real estate or so that souls don’t become numb to the violence (since let’s face it, most demonic torturers probably can’t keep them in anticipation of further horror as well as Alistair can, after a few days or months being cut into.) They’re probably returned to their cells to marinate in the memory and anticipation with only minor tortures until they’re brought down again. This is what we see with Bobby and probably with the endless lineups in Crowley’s redesigned Hell.
So - without too much to go on, I’m going to tentatively place the Dungeon with Bobby and other damned souls as being in the sixth circle, Heresy. It’s a circle described as hosting souls in flaming tombs, which I think fits this notion of a dungeon with cells holding on to souls, and keeps those souls close at hand and ready for another go in the seventh circle where The Rack is held.
And this allows me to place the endless line as actually being either in the fourth circle, Greed, or the fifth circle, Wrath. The fourth involves a nation of lost souls who, in this pit of hell, lose their individuality and become sort of empty, which fits what we see in that brief clip of the Hell line. The fifth includes a “savage self-frustration” that seems fitting of the concept of that awful endless line, with sullen and angry souls fighting each other in muck and slime.
Regardless of fourth or fifth (I have no strong sense of which fits better), I see that line as being meaningful outside (above) the sixth circle, in a torment that is less acute, as souls that are less unique and differentiated, less violent, less worthy of turning into black-eyed demons.
Because in the Inferno, there’s this critical division between the fifth vs. sixth circles as the transition between the two being the transition into “Lower Hell” and the sixth being behind guarded walls, with another steep drop from the sixth to the seventh, and so on. This makes sense to me as Lower Hell being a place where they keep the Dungeon and guard the doomed souls, whereas that place outside those walls hosting the damned but less special, less differentiated, the more generically doomed... yeah, it just makes sense to me (your mileage, as always, may vary).
This distinction is important also because of that drop down. If distance and depth are important to temporal distortion, then it matters if the first few circles of Hell involve less of a steep drop one to the next. Here we should note that the seventh circle involves three rings, and the eighth circle (Fraud, aka Malebolge, another very strong contender for the location of The Rack since it’s essentially an amphitheater for torture, so I’ll do the math both ways below)*, well the eighth is basically a funnel with 10 separate rings or steps downward.
Why does this matter? So glad you asked!
Increasing Temporal Distortion at Each Level
If you’re following the hints I’m dropping, what I’m implying about getting deeper into Hell and the further drops down at the later levels is that the time distortion in Hell does not increase linearly. It increases exponentially.
Limbo has temporal distortion that is so minor as to be barely perceptible, if perceptible at all. The Rack gives us an explicit (if fuzzy) estimate of 1 month = 1 decade in terms of perception. The Cage is implied to be much, much more than that, at the extreme end up to 2-3 minutes = 1 week in terms of perception.
If the time distortion was linear, meaning that from circle 1 to circle 2, and circle 2 to 3, and 3 to 4 and so on, we should expect that the amount of time distortion from Limbo (circle 1) to the Rack (circle 7 or 8) to be a much, much wider gap than the amount of time distortion from the Rack (circle 7 or 8) to the Cage (circle 9). Like... it should be 7-8x as much distortion.
And I mean, you could take a linear headcanon approach to it. If we accept that SPN Hell has circles or layers as is Word of God and overtly implied by the narrative time and again, you could say that there’s x amount of distortion at circle 1, and 2x at circle 2, and 3x at circle 3, etc, and this would works okay when we got the math right, but like... it’s not my preference given the way canon works.
What I mean (especially for those who hate math so might not be automatically sussing what I’m saying), is that, for example, if 10 seconds in Limbo = 1 second on Earth (sure why not) then if the time distortion increases the same way (”linearly”) at each new circle of hell, then on the Rack we get 70 seconds = 1 Earth second (or 80 seconds = 1 Earth second, if the Rack is in the eighth circle).
That specific math doesn’t check out (it equates to 23.3 years on the Rack instead of 40, or 26.7 if the Rack is the eighth circle instead of the seventh), but to figure this out we should of course work backwards starting from the 4 months = 40 years. Which tells us that each second on Earth feels like 120seconds (2 minutes) on The Rack. If that’s happening at the seventh circle, then a linear difference between each circle of hell means that the time distortion in Limbo is roughly 17 seconds for every Earth second. This math works out a little prettier if the Rack is the eighth circle because that’s an even 15 seconds for every Earth second.
To me, that’s stretching how much time distortion is implied to occur at Limbo and vastly exaggerating what we see with Sam rescuing Bobby from Hell. If Bobby is actually kept in the 6th circle, that’s 102 (7th circle) or 190 (8th circle) seconds in Hell for every second on Earth. It just didn’t seem that Sam was spending a minute and a half in Hell for every second that Dean was spending on the surface in Taxi Driver, but then again, I haven’t rewatched that episode so I’d have to double check to know for sure.
Between those implications about time distortion in Limbo and Bobby’s rescue and even the Throne room when they visit Rowena to the way Dante’s Inferno (which SPN canon clearly drew from) funnels more extremely downward the deeper you go in the circles, to what Sam’s episode of Hell memories could imply about his experience of time dilation in the Cage (assuming we accept his statement about his episode “feeling like a week” even if we don’t take that number at exactly face value)... an exponential increase just makes more sense, mathematically?
And again, for anyone who doesn’t like math or doesn’t know what that means and why I keep using this word “exponentially,” what it means is that the difference between the first circle and the second circle is not as big as the difference between the second circle and the third circle. At each depth, the intensity of the time dilation increases. So that you might not even notice the difference in time dilation between circle 1 and 2, but the difference between circle 5 and 6 is massively noticeable, and the difference between circle 8 and circle 9 is like several times even that big. Like Inception!
So let’s run some final calculations and get you your answer(s), Anon!
Some Final Math and Estimates*
Assumption 1: Equivalent Dilation
If we assume that there is no difference in time dilation from one region of Hell to another, then the ratio that Dean gives us in Season 4 is accurate for all of Hell, and 1 month (30 days) in the pit feels like 10 years. That’s 120 seconds below to every second above.
This would mean that in 18 months in the Cage, Sam experiences 180 years worth of torture.
Assumption 2: Linear Dilation Circle 7
Assuming The Rack is in the seventh circle, then a linear difference at each level means that 120 seconds on the Rack equates to 154 seconds in the Cage at the ninth level. That would mean that in 18 months topside, Sam’s soul spent 231.5 years in the Cage.
Assumption 3: Linear Dilation Circle 8
Assuming the Rack is in the eighth circle (which, tbh, I kind of thing makes more sense even though I argued differently above, but shhh let’s pretend otherwise), then a linear difference at each level means that 120 seconds there equates to only 202.5 years for Sam’s soul in the Cage. Slightly less awful!
Assumption 4: Exponential Dilation Circle 7
The simple way I’m doing this is that instead of taking the time distortion at Limbo and making it x2 at the second circle, x3 at the third, and so on, I’m taking the time distortion at Limbo and making it to the power of 2 at the second circle, to the power of 3 at the third, and so on. I still have to start with The Rack being 120seconds on Earth time and work backwards to get that initial Limbo starting point before I apply the exponent, but otherwise that’s all I’m doing. There are definitely more sophisticated ways we could approach it since that’s a pretty simple linear increase in the exponent, and we could instead make the exponent itself an equation we’d derive through more complex means but... I’m really not about to do that.
So.
If we start from The Rack = 120seconds (2mins), using the exponent assumptions above, then Limbo time dilation is roughly 2 seconds (actually 1.98167 or so) in Limbo for every Earth second (works beautifully for what we see in canon, basically imperceptible), and time dilation in the ninth circle is 471 seconds (7.85 mins) per Earth second. Yes, that big of a difference, because that’s how exponents work.
This would mean that Sam’s soul spent approximately 707 years in the Cage.
What a great number! What a reasonable number, and a pretty damn canon-compliant number to headcanon. I like this number.
Assumption 5: Exponential Dilation Circle 8
As above in terms of the exponent assumptions, if the Rack is actually in the 8th circle of Hell, that much closer to the Cage, then here the math works out so that 120 seconds on the 8th circle being... roughly 2 seconds in Limbo. Because that’s how exponential functions work. It’s actually 1.81928 in Limbo vs. the previous 1.98167, but that rounds to the same thing (2 seconds) in terms of human experience, even if it makes a big difference when we take it out to the difference it makes in months, years, etc.
(But like, this is why I think it’s exponential, because this works so much better for what canon implies about the time dilation there*.)
Anyway, here, this would mean that Sam’s soul spent roughly 327.5 years in the Cage instead of the 707 from above. That’s a big difference.
Assumption 6: Off the Rails
We can also take Sam’s statement about 2-3 minutes on Earth (having a Hell flashback) feeling like a week in the pit. If we estimate conservatively and go with every 3 Earth minutes = 1 week in Hell, depending on how we approach it (depending on if you go with minutes in a week vs. a month and which way you get to a year), you get somewhere around 5000 years (in my present calculation it’s 4984, but I also calculated it another way to get to just over 5000).
Assumption 7: 9th Circle vs. The Cage
Dante’s Inferno distinguishes between the 9th Circle on its own vs. the Center of Hell as the place where Lucifer resides, right at the deepest depths. The Cage itself is remote in Hell, distant from all other demons, enough so as to be a matter of faith to many of them. If we allow the possibility that this all means that the Cage is deeper than the ninth circle itself*, we can add another linear layer or else another exponent (take our equation to the 10 instead of to the 9).
This works out to be:
Rack 7th Circle, Linear: 257 years
Rack 8th Circle, Linear: 225 years
Rack 7th Circle, Exponential: 1400 years
Rack 8th Circle, Exponential: 596 years
Meaning this is a good place to note that... depending on the final number you want to get to, you can use whichever assumptions you want to get there and justify it by math. Remember kids, there are lies, damn lies, and statistics.
TL;DR!!!!!
How much time did Sam’s soul spend in the Cage? My headcanon is that he spent probably either 600 or 700 years there, on the assumption that it was 18 months between Swan Song and Appointment in Samarra, and assuming time dilation gets more extreme the deeper that you go in Hell.
For people who want to make more conservative estimates but still embed some complexity to Hell’s time dilation and/or who be more canon-compliant to other glimpses we’ve seen of Hell’s time distortion (Limbo, etc), I think anywhere from about 200 years to 330 years is perfectly reasonable.
For people who want to go with maximum whump, the sky (5000) is the limit, but you can mathematically point to up to 1400 being pretty reasonable.
*Footnotes
1. Because canon plays fast and loose with how many months exactly have gone by, and some people headcanon that only about 4 months have passed in Season 6 before Appointment in Samarra when Death pulls his soul out. I personally read it as more like 6 months having gone by and think this is the more standard headcanon, so your 180 years is the most common interpretation, and definitely the most easy to defend. I also made calculations for Sam having spent 16 months in the Cage instead of 18 months there though, if anyone is interested.
2. There is also the Vestibule in the Inferno as the opening to Hell, before the first circle, and this requires passage from Charon to cross over and into Hell proper. This is where the quote “Abandon All Hope, Ye Who Enter Here” is from at the Gate of Hell, which of course is evoked in season 5 as the episode in which Jo and Ellen die.
I like to think of the Vestibule in the world of SPN as being any and all of the many Hellgates implied by canon, including the one that opens in AHBL2. No time dilation occurs within the Vestibule(s), as a person has to enter into Hell’s circles to properly separate themselves from the material plane.
3. Not getting into it here but if I ever get around to writing an original piece of fiction about angels and demons etc like I kind of want to, some of my worldbuilding will explicitly connect/relate angels to celestial bodies, like literally to stars, with the depth of hell essentially being a black hole, hence why the closer one gets to it, the greater the time dilation there is. Gravity and heat increase near the center of hell in this unbearable way, and then at the very center, like within the black hole itself, it becomes unbearably incredibly cold, like that frozen lake in which Lucifer is half-submerged in Dante’s Inferno. Lucifer existing impossibly both within and outside the event horizon. But I digress.
4. When you think about how many angels are implied to have died in order to rescue Dean’s soul, compared to how simply Sam snuck into Hell to rescue Bobby, I think the circles of Hell interpretation becomes quite important. If Dean was in the seventh or eighth circle, like especially that eighth circle, that’s so much deeper in than the Dungeon. The angels also couldn’t infiltrate subtly, methinks, and had to storm the walled and heavily guarded gates at the sixth circle, through that dungeon, then fight their way down the three rings of the seventh circle and possibly down into the amphitheater of the eighth. We know that their powers alone can’t kill a demon as powerful as Alistair even on Earth, so on their home turf in Hell, it makes sense that demons would have put up a really solid fight against the angels. This helps resolve some of my own frustration at what seems to be discrepancies in the abilities of angels and how dangerous they are to demons in canon.
5. Please be aware that all maths above involve some rounding, since I didn’t think anyone wanted the detailed decimals. I also calculated months as being 30 days and for simplicity, calculated years as being 12 months. I could rework the math into weeks with 52 weeks being a year instead, which gives slightly different numbers, but it’s work so I’m just going to go with these approximations. Also noting that I used calculated everything using excel to save myself a headache. I’m sorry if there are any errors, especially when it comes to the exponents, my brain got very tired. Please let me know if you find any.
6. When it comes to the exponential ones, if The Rack is in the 7th circle of hell, then if the Dungeon where Bobby was kept was in the 6th circle, then each Earth second is 60 seconds (1 minute) in the Dungeon. That’s more time dilation than I think canon implies, because 60 minutes (1hr) in the Dungeon is only a minute on Earth? In contrast if The Rack is in the 8th circle, then 1 Earth second is 36 seconds in the Dungeon. I honestly think both of these are more extreme than canon implies, but again, it’s been a million years since I watched that episode because it’s written by Bucklemming and I cannot stand their writing. But as a count in favor of the exponential argument instead of linear, if time dilation increases the same amount at each circle then 1 Earth second translates to 103 seconds in the Dungeon (Rack in 7th) or 90 seconds (Rack in 8th), both of which are a lot more dilation than our exponential account.
7. For simplicity, I’ve also ignored the different rings which occur at the 7th and 8th circles. Those would, of course, change the math here as well, and we could add another linear or exponential step for each of those rings. That would lead to some crazy numbers because we’re talking about 13 additional steps. Linearly we’d add a few thousand years, but exponentially we’re starting to talk about a geological timescale. I don’t think it’s productive to make that extreme of an assumption about those rings, but I think we could comfortably stretch the distance between the 7th circle and the pit in which Lucifer’s cage sits at the deepest depths of hell if we wanted to, if you wanted to reasonably get closer to that 5000 years estimate.
8. Since your ask mentioned it, Anon, I realize I don’t touch on Enochian in this post but I have two tag-rambles about my thoughts on enochian and I thought I had a proper post on it somewhere but can’t find it. I could/should probably make a post with a tumblr ficlet about that, since I started drafting a canon-divergent post-Hell fic with Sam and Enochian and there’s like... no chance I’ll ever finish it. But anyway.
Thanks for reading this far, to anyone who did.
#spn meta#my meta#hell meta#time dilation#temporal distortion#time distortion#headcanons#dante's inferno#this meta is 5200 words that's longer than many fics wtf#there is a tl;dr though you don't have to read the whole thing#what did you do this week phyn? oh y'know just wrote 4k words of meta to make a hell time distortion equation#that literally no one asked for (except they kinda did but i'm sure not like this)#i get one (1) day off and this is what happens#did i read the thesis chapter one of my grad students is waiting for feedback on?#nope! i wrote a time distortion equation instead#if you can't tell from these tags i'm going a little feral over here#okay whew i'm calm i'm good#i'm not proofreading this so if there are typos or issues or my math is off we're just gonna deal with that reality#probably gonna rb later for timezones because i can
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i'm v flattered and :))) by the amount of stuff i've seen in fanfics recently that makes reference to stuff i've pointed out, i love the feeling of passing the brainworms back and forth
#i hope. eventually. when i post my fics. you guys will feel the same hdskbdjffb#i see something and im like HEY!! i just posted about that :^)))#ada speaks#ive literally had moments on here where my jaw drops and i go HOLY SHIT SO TRUE WTF#alas. i am cursed to never finish my fics#one day. i already have like 6 oneshots in my drafts and most of them are over 4k words but.#the amount of meta i have saved in my drafts from y'all where i just#👁👁👁👁 revisit and rotate
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"Regarding the bits of Claudia's diary that have been torn out, in reply to Louis' "It's clear what happened," Daniel says, "And she wrote about it, and I'd like to read it." Why do you think Daniel insist that he wants to read about Claudia's assault and why does Louis refuse him that information?"
Daniel's a journalist, and the one thing the media thrives on is spectacle. Nothing gets them going quite like being able to dip their microphones & cameras in a wound and getting the gory details in 4k. "Pictures, or it didn't happen. Proof, or it didn't happen." They will risk life & limb to get the deets, and bless them, truly! Cuz Daniel's right: some ish really DOES NEED to be exposed & talked about!
But Daniel's handling of Claudia really crossed the line, IMO.
Daniel has zero respect or regard for Louis (& Claudia), and it shows.
Louis told Daniel something deeply traumatic & personal, but insensitive AF Daniel just makes it all about himself, what HE wanted, rather than respecting people's privacy & right to say NO.
This HUMAN BOY consistently acts WAY too out of pocket with his macro-aggressions against a literal creature of the night, cuz Louis NEEDS him too much to kill him--LOL, or so he thought! XD
Daniel "was disrespectful" to Louis all the way back in 1973, BEFORE he even got bit, so IDGAF how "nervous" he claims to be, post-bite.
YES, Louis "editorializes"--and YES, he's an unreliable narrator; but Daniel should be a good enough investigative Pulitzer winning PROFESSIONAL to read between the lines to sus out the details; regardless of Louis not giving him access to the missing pages. Eff journalistic integrity I guess. Even IRL news reports leave out the names, photos, & identities of underage victims, as a sign of respect. But Daniel wants to splash Claudia's rape all over the place, salivating over the chance to read about her being raped, and snarking to her father's face about people wearing "SEXY Claudia costumes," wtF?!
Like, what TF does having Claudia's verbatim description of being raped ADD to LOUIS' story about HIS life? He's not the one who raped her! And what right does Daniel (i.e.: the audience surrogate) have to read her words & see the pages? CLAUDIA's not the one who asked to be interviewed, LOUIS is.
TBH, I doubt those missing pages still exist for Daniel to even read. I wouldn't be surprised if Louis torched those pages, even if the words are burned into his skull, just like he'd memorized Claudia's words when Charlie burned. And we know Louis & Merrick used the torn out pages as a sacrifice to summon Claudia's ghost.
In Merrick, Claudia's words really were NEEDED, to summon her ghost (as the voodoo spell specifically required things that had belonged to her: her doll, diary, mom's name, etc). Her ghost was the main goal; everything else was sacrificed in a fire--inc. Louis. 🔥💀 But in AMC's IWTV it's a bit different. Louis gave Daniel the diaries as another reference, a 3rd party view; but the primary source is LOUIS. LOUIS' voice/words are the most important; everything else is supplementary. This isn't magic with rules requiring Claudia's rape-pages. It is not a CRIME to withhold information in a biographical work--Louis is not ON TRIAL in Dubai, he cannot be perjured by Daniel (who himself admitted that Lou has enough PTSD to be treated like war veterans on EMDR; Louis would NEVER be allowed to testify on the stand in a court of law IRL, he's so mentally unstable). IWTV is LOUIS' story--Claudia's Story is a spinoff. Claudia wrote those diaries for her own private eyes, never expecting some old fart would be poring over them 80 years later.
If one of DANIEL'S daughters were raped, and it was caught on camera, would HE want the paps in THEIR faces, spreading the video on TMZ or Twitter or wherever? "Watching the whole thing, like some CREEPER?" HAYUL NO!
The audacity of this self-entitled mofo to DEMAND Louis give him the pages--I'd've done WAY more than make his hand shake, istg.
OP, why are your questions always tryna put me in the hospital? 😅
The way Daniel & Merrick treated Louis is telling, too--Merrick wanted Louis to make her a vampire too, and she forced/bewitched him into doing it when he would've said no, too. Used & abused at every turn, ISTG.
Once Claudia returns to New Orleans after her travels, how long do you think she spent watching Louis and Lestat before she came home, and do you think it would have taken her longer if she had not seen Grace’s final rejection of Louis in the cemetery, deciding there that her purpose was to be Louis' sister?
Yes, I think it would've taken Claudia longer--maybe not by much, cuz she came back for a reason, even knowing Louis had been looking for her. But she'd've waited for real proof, to see something that convinced her that she was missed, cuz Claudia thought she was unwanted & unloved. She thought Lou was happier just being with Les; that she was in the way; that Lou was just giving her empty platitudes. She was scared to go back home, scared she'd be resented & rejected (thanks, Lestat 😒); visibly shaking even more than Louis was when he cried & held her.
So seeing Louis lose Grace was kinda like Lestat seeing Louis lose Paul. They each thought they were replacing/substituting Louis' family ("I'm your family, Louis" / "We're a family?"); neither one of them understanding that Louis' heart was HUGE--he had more than enough space for ALL of them together. But Les & Claudia were too similar, each thinking Louis was something to be claimed & monopolized--"Come to me, Louis" / "Come with me, Louis"--that they couldn't coexist if they were competing for all of Louis' love & attention (especially Lestat, jfc).
So Claudia mistakenly thought she was filling a Grace-shaped hole in Louis' heart, "It's never been about ME!"; and to her dying day she didn't realize that there was a Claudia-shaped hole that bled every time he said "Sister/Brother." In Dubai, Louis explicitly says she's his daughter. 😭💔
Rewind the tape —an AMC IWTV group rewatch
Episode 5: A Vile Hunger for Your Hammering Heart
IWTVfanevents is hosting a rewatch of the first season in the lead up to the Season 2 premiere on May 12th! Today, Sunday, April 7th, we’re starting with Episode 5: A Vile Hunger for Your Hammering Heart
All throughout the week, we will be talking about our favorite scenes, quotes, looks, behind the scenes and trivia facts; and discussing the episode using the tag #vampterview. And we want to hear from you!
We want to know your favorite quote, your most beloved scene, your choice for look of the night, any backstage or trivia facts that stuck with you... or anything else! We're offering a couple prompts, but we'd love to see your fanart, headcanons, burning questions, or liveblogs.
Watch with your friends or in your own time, and come talk about the show we love and countdown the weeks to season two with us, here or on Twitter, using the tag #vampterview.
Click here to learn more about this dedicated tag ►
We’re kicking off discussion of Episode 5 with two questions:
Regarding the bits of Claudia's diary that have been torn out, in reply to Louis' "It's clear what happened," Daniel says, "And she wrote about it, and I'd like to read it." Why do you think Daniel insist that he wants to read about Claudia's assault and why does Louis refuse him that information? Once Claudia returns to New Orleans after her travels, how long do you think she spent watching Louis and Lestat before she came home, and do you think it would have taken her longer if she had not seen Grace’s final rejection of Louis in the cemetery, deciding there that her purpose was to be Louis' sister?
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So I was playing Elden Ring and just noticed how every boss is literally weakened by the passage of time. Is this a thing in all Fromsoft games? Elden Ring is the first one I've played and it's fascinating how Fromsoft made it a point to show bosses facing their end because they've been eroded by time.
Is that a thing mechanically? Like I know its open world so do the bosses you choose to do later get scaled down/dont scale to your new level to make it so the later you do a boss the weaker they are? If that's what you mean, no that is an Elden Ring thing.
If you mean lorewise, does the game show how these are ancient beings who are long past their prime and at best a hollow shell of what they once were pretending to be the legend described, oh yes that is very much a FromSoftware thing. And I dont know WHY IN GOD’S NAME I felt a need to systematically break down some examples, but I super did. So here we fcking go. [BUT THATS YOUR TLDR: “YES.” WTF IS WRONG WITH ME THE REST OF THIS IS LIKE 4K WORDS. Oh and sorry in advance for the length before the break but it only lets ya put one Keep Reading i guess...]
Gonna put a spoiler break only later on for heavy spoilers. In the meanwhile there will be light spoilers for Dark Souls 1, 2, 3, and Bloodborne. There will be no Elden Ring or Sekiro spoilers in this post (albeit only cause I've avoided spoiling myself as much as possible on both lol)
Again, the answer is basically “yes.” Like, that is Fromsoft design 101. That has been the core philosophy of every final boss across Dark Souls, Demon's Souls, and Bloodborne. Hell, most bosses in the series in general. It's even a thing in Sekiro, albeit a lot of it is presented very differently (As far as I am anyways. See above.)
> Light spoilers for Bloodborne follow.
Father Gascoigne, the first mandatory boss of Bloodborne, sets the tone very well for this sort of thing. Hunters are very clearly supposed to be the ones who keep order and cull the insane and the beasts during the Night of the Hunt, and when you encounter the only named Hunter thus far it starts out exactly like that, finding a priest in a graveyard with the same weapons you start with, dressed similarly to the default Hunter's attire and hacking at a beast...except, it becomes immediately apparent that it’s already long dead, less a hunter killing prey and more a butcher obsessed with a carcass. Upon noticing you, a fellow hunter, he says “Beasts All Over The Shop…..You’ll be one of them….Sooner Or Later….”
before turning around and revealing he's blindfolded as he lets out a raspy, feral growl. ...And then halfway through the fight he turns into a fucking werewolf.
Yeah, despite being a Fromsoft game, Bloodborne is very quick to make clear what's going on in it. Between the insane mob of villagers, the werewolves running around, the giant roaring abomination that's supposedly a Cleric, and now the first fellow hunter you meet (one working for the Church that is supposed to be the governing authority no less) is as crazed as the beasts themselves and several times as deadly in his brutality, this is clearly a place that has gone to hell long ago, and Gascoigne already told you why: "Sooner or later, you'll be one of them too." Between Gascoigne turning into a beast moments after telling us we'll eventually be one ourselves, and the cryptic lines from our hub dream world about how this is all happened before and is a tradition that will continue, it's pretty clear Bloodborne is about ‘he who fights monsters’ in the most literal sense, and it demonstrates that by having you fight people who have been fighting monsters for far too long to hold onto who they were. This world where crusading hunters once took up arms to defend their home from a plague of beasts are now as bloodlusted as the beasts themselves, to the point where the second mandatory boss ALSO transforms from human to monster before our eyes.
It's really the DLC that goes all in on this idea though. without properly spoiling anything (this is all stuff that is literally in the official description and its CALLED The Old Hunters), names that you heard lauded as great heroes finally make their appearance proper...but as twisted and broken beings who bear no resemblance to their legends and every resemblance to the things they were meant to destroy.
> Light to moderate spoilers for DS3.
You know how Elden Ring does that thing at the start where it shows you all these long fallen characters you yourself will eventually encounter and stuff? Yeah that’s something of a staple of Fromsoftware, specifically what they did with DS1 and 3. While 1 is a lot more coy about it and waits til like the halfway point, though, 3 makes it clear it’s doing the same thing DS1 did right out the gate. “The world is dying, you’re gonna face these guys, and you’re gonna catch on quick they’re all mere shadows of the legends they’re meant to be, in fact we are literally telling you this in the intro.”
And much as I love taking any chance whatsoever to rave about how the best boss in the entire series is The Abyss Watchers, it’s actually everyone’s favorite DS3 meme Yhorm the Giant who takes it. He’s possibly the most built up of all the bosses: Last of the giants and their king, a being who can’t even be killed by the weapons of men, a descendant of a conqueror and a warriors king in his own right...now nothing but a mindless, burnt out husk quietly waiting for death on a subconscious level. He once wielded a greatshield but now two-hands his sword, having long since stopped acting as a ruler in the face of all he’s lost and becoming nothing more than a weapon. Long ago he would give the Storm Ruler, the giant-slaying sword, to those who did not trust him to rule as an act of honor; now it lies carelessly strewn alongside his throne, and Yhorm will attempt to crush you long before you reach it. His one friend Siegward joins you because he knew from the start Yhorm would be like this, and seeks to put the husk out of its misery, even if it costs him his life. Siegward makes clear he would rather die than let his once friend Yhorm spiral ever further into a decay that he is too great to be consumed by yet not great enough to escape, and that’s the entire point. Greatness is a curse, not a blessing. Immortal Life can do nothing to stop the world around you from succumbing to erosion and decay. Just as Yhorm awoke from kindling to find his people still suffered, just as his empire inevitably fell and left him alone, so too did the entire world begin to die as the fire faded ever further. Hollowing is inevitable, because you will always be powerless against entropy in the end. Yhorm knows this beyond any other Lord of Cinder. Whereas the others all went astray in their selfishness or simply went insane from corruption, Yhorm is the one who truly despaired and simply...gave up, on trying to hold onto what he was. His body persisted as a hollowed husk of a once incredible being, but the mind within it died in the face of an immutable reality. Even in gameplay he’s just a walking shell, one of the easiest boss fights in sosulborne history thanks to him having kept a weapon designed for killing him at his side; the Storm Ruler isn’t some measly damage buff against an enemy type, this thing kills him in like 5 hits. From the start you weren’t ‘fighting’ something that was meant to be fought, but to be put down.
> Moderate spoilers for DS1 (middle third of the game or so)
DS1 arguably has the most wide scale example of this, since the entire point of the game is that every major boss is a once great god gone astray, and you have an entire city demonstrating this. At the start of the game we’re shown all these incredible being of old, and it’s made out as if we’re watching legends who created the world give us context on our upcoming adventure. These beings are made out as distant entities so much greater than any of us, meant to be acted in the name of as we kill dragons and stuff. But then, around the third to halfway point, it becomes clear we’ll be fighting them ourselves, and these ‘distant almighty gods’ have fallen from their glory and become what are simply more monsters to be cut down. Nito the lord of the dead is least changed but acts entirely in self interest at this point, dwelling the dark catacombs after imposing the very concept of death onto the world and not caring the slightest for what came after, to the point that what truly weakens him is not Pinwheel’s fucking about, but rather the sheer energy he is putting out to impose the concept of death onto an ever more undead world. The Witch of Izalith? Where to start, how about the fact that in her hubris of thinking she could recreate the first flame, that as a being who had lost their glory she could simply recreate that glory, she turned herself into a horrid abomination and shit-tier boss fight? Because of COURSE that happened. How could you reclaim the height of your power when even at the height of your power you could not hold onto it? How about Seath? Oh the things to say about Seath, what can we call him? Cruel, Jealous, Spiteful, literally and figuratively jaded, insane, pathetic, but of all the things we can call him those things are not “glorious” or “immortal”. He became desperate for the immortality he supposedly “proved” he didnt need by killing his scaled brethren. From declaring he did not need his peers’ immortality, to going insane over his obsession with cloying at whatever possible escape from death there might be.
From Nito’s indifference to Izalith’s hubris to Seath’s madness, they are all fallen in their own way. All their attempts to hold onto their glory only serve to further remove them from it. So many millennia and the god of Death has only become weaker as the world dies. The Witch’s magic that is meant to bend chaos to its will could only damn its wielder in the face of nature’s course. The crystal dragon’s immortality is exactly that: crystal, the fruits of his cruelty and madness nothing more than a feeble crystal easily shattered.
But to loop it all back around, it’s the final bosses of the series who really hammer the theme of ‘faded glory’ home.
> Major spoilers for DS1, DS2, and Demon’s Souls to follow, starting with DS1.
First though....Hey remember that bit I casually dropped about an entire city? You arrive to Anor Londo, carried from desolate undead asylum or the dregs of Blighttown to a great golden city illuminated perpetually by the sunset, powerful knights and cleric giants all over the place, lightning and miracle using enemies whose powers are synonymous with Gwyn’s legacy, and at the end of that gauntlet are Ornstein and Smough in their golden armor and every bit tough and lively as their legends portray. Beyond them, you meet the beautiful Gwynevere who gives you the Lordsoul to truly start your quest for the gods in linking the flame. Even if the gods are all fallen or helpless on their own, we can at least see the legacy they created and hopefully spread through the land. We can at least bring this light back to the rest of the world, knowing it can still be sustained.
Except, that was a lie. It was all a fucking lie.
A lie orchestrated by one feeble god desperate to maintain a literal illusion of his family’s grandeur. A god whose main tactic should you fight him is to run away forever in an endless hallway and blast you with magic because he’s otherwise powerless against a simple human. Should you find and successfully kill Gwyndolin, the magic he cast over the city fades, and we see Anor Londo for what it really is: Dark. The city of the gods, the capital of the Age of Fire that stands against the Dark, has itself gone Dark, and we can’t even begin to imagine for how long it’s been that way. The gods, their cities, their subjects, their champions, all of it is just a shadow cast so long ago that it doesn’t resemble that which cast it, and any evidence that their time hasn’t passed is just another lie you’ve been fed. (...Side note, watch this video I subconsciously almost quoted verbatim)
Thus enters the God who lived and died for that lie, unable to accept a reality in which he did not rule. Thus we meet Gwyn himself....or at least, what little is left of him. Because that guy the game has been building up as your ultimate challenge? That top god who by this point has Final Boss written all over him? That guy who STARTED all this crap and is basically Zeus the Dragon Butcher? Gwyn, Lord of Sunlight?
You don’t fight him. You fight a walking husk, and this time I mean that literally. Burnt inside and out with a body of charcoal and soul of ash. You fight one of the easiest bosses in the game, a boss the devs explicitly stated was designed to make sure any possible build would not struggle much with. You fight a guy who doesn’t have a single lightning attack. You fight Gwyn, Lord of Cinder. And by the next game, he doesn’t even have a name. The one who conquered the everlasting dragons and ushered humanity into their first age is barely a memory in Dark Souls 2, simply known as a distant sun god; his own miracles that were so crucial to his legacy don’t even acknowledge him. The one person we meet who remembers he properly existed regards Gwyn as a blind fool who did not save humanity, but damn it. And by Dark Souls 3, Gwyn isn’t even his own being, he’s just one of many nameless souls to link the first flame.
Once the most powerful of all gods and savior of humankind, now no more valued than the random undead schmuck you played as. Without a doubt the one you see fall the furthest in any Fromsoft game is Gwyn, and it’s exactly what he deserved.
> Onto DS2
Because while Gwyn is the definitive example, he’s not the most extreme example; I’d argue that’s Vendrick. You might disagree since his fall was not as far, but what we saw of him WAS harsher than anything we saw of Gwyn. If not the most extreme, he’s certainly the most tragic, because unlike so many other cases of this in the series, Vendrick knew and accepted that this would happen to him. He’s one of a handful of figures across the series who embody the idea that, among all these legends, the ones truly worth being remembered for their glory are the ones who recognized they must eventually let go of said glory.
What I mean by “what we saw” is...well, just like Gwyn, Vendrick is built up over the course of the game as the great king and conqueror who ruled over the world you’re travelling around, and while Gwyn is foreshadowed as the big bad, Vendrick is directly made out to be the final boss. You’re given a quest, you overcome trials, and it’s all directly in the name of reaching this ancient tyrannical being who as a mere man conquered giants and reigned dragons. And when you finally go through a gauntlet to reach him and break his seals...
...you’re met with a feeble, shriveled Hollow who can barely drag his sword.
Gwyn at least gave the player a sense of who he was. He was a husk, and he was weak, but he put up a fight. He was waiting for you, undeniably himself in body if not mind, and commanding the first flame as his own with a blade wreathed in those flames. He stares you down as you enter and rushes you when you approach, his iconic theme playing as he silently lashes out at you. He was a husk, but he was never completely without dignity. Vendrick doesn’t have any of that. He’s hunched and aimlessly wandering his small chamber when you find him, not even attacking until you’ve hit him several times. He has no grand, iconic requiem accompanying his battle. Instead there is the scant few piano chords of a whisper filled dirge fading in and out, as faded as the empty being before your that has thrown away all but his blade and his crown. His robes, his precious ring, all of it cast aside, knowing the fate that awaited him would have no use for them. He’s nothing more visibly imposing than a giant version of the most basic hollows. His only unique abilities are the incredibly durability and raw strength, both of which he can longer wield effectively as one of the most predictable fights in the game; the same bait and strike tactic that works on any starting grunt works just as well on him. The closest thing to a unique attack he has is a single curse spell that represents everything he was trying to defy.
Gwyn was a far cry of his once glorious self, but he was a proper final boss in atmosphere and presentation if not strength or challenge. There’s no comparison to Vendrick, who is downright unrecognizable and was never your true foe to begin with...just a poor hollow to be put out of its misery...
> But Wait There’s [one] More [thank god]! It’s finally Demon’s Souls time.
Demon’s Souls is very much the Proto-Dark Souls in a lot of ways and how it conveys its themes is no exception. The big thing about soulsborne games is how, as you said at the start of this essay, the things we fight have all been eroded by the passage of time. We don’t see what their true potential is. We never meet them in their full glory. We can only strike down what remains of that faded legend. Even when something like time travel gets involved with various DLCs, we fight things like the Burnt Ivory King and Artorias of the Abyss. Even in the past, the legends we face are already corrupted almost beyond recognition. You simply don’t get to see what their prime is, no matter how curious we may be, because that’s the whole point of the theme of fading glory: You can’t get that back. You can only accept that it’s gone.
.....Old King Allant is a massive, blitz speed, Final Explosion-ing, soul sucking exception to this.
Look at this. Look. At. This. LOOK AT THIS SHIT.
This is not a shell, this is not a husk, there is nothing faded about this Alabaster curb-stomper - he’s practically radiant. Whether he’s something exceptional in difficulty is up to debate, but what isn’t up for discussion is how he’s presented, because every. single. attack. of his radiates power. I’m talking, like, Vergil levels of P O W E R. He’s got a winged aura of storm winds, he delays his windups only to then lunge forward at breakneck speed, just the way he draws sword to face you gives off raw “I’m going to fuck you up” energy - the sword in question being Soulbrandt, a blade that he never once let go of out of his infatuation with the way it grew in strength as his soul grew darker. He sends shockwave projectiles, not magic sword beams, pure shockwaves from how hard and fast he’s attacking. He almost never gets stunned compared to any other human, he has resistances against just about everything including the ability to shrug off any magic you throw at him, and his own magic is so powerful he can either one-shot explode you or steal your levels as he kills you. Above all else though, he’s brutal. He’ll attack relentlessly and swiftly, taking out anyone who’s relying on heal-tanking or fucking around to find out. There are various exploits as there always are, but for most players, regardless of difficulty he’s the one boss we all fear: The kind where there is no trick, you just have to git gud at learning his patterns and countering them. And that’s the main thing that stick with you, just like with Artorias or Maria or Ludwig or Gael or every single bloody Sekiro boss [and from what I’ve seen almost certainly Melania], there’s a swiftness, brutality, and efficiency that truly conveys the power of this legendary figure you’re up against.
Not bad for an illusion, eh?
Yeah I’ve ignored that bit long enough. Old King Allant, or to give his other name, the False King Allant, is truly worthy of being called a warrior king at the peak of his glory....because he was created to be that. The game’s final boss, King Allant XII, is not some alabaster tyrant who conquers dragons and command the demons. He is something even lower than Vendrick in its own way, a mass of mutated, inhuman flesh that pulses and can barely so much as reach out to you let alone strike you, unable to even wield the Soulbrandt fused with its lower carcass, still desperately clinging to it even as the power of the Old One has overwhelmed his physical form. He sought ever more glory, ever more certain his could never fade, and so unlike Gwyn who was puppeted or Vendrick who was hollowed, he became something not just less than human, but unrecognizable as human. We saw him in his glory, and while he retained the strength and power to make that zenith seemingly eternal, intent on and complacent with ruling from his dwelling with the Old One as a mere specter goes forth in his image, when confronted he is not powerful at all. He is, if anything, completely powerless.
Gwyn retained his visage and his dignity, but lost who he was, a burnt husk who possesses none of his own legacy and was doomed to ultimately be forgotten for the very reason of desperately holding onto his glory. Vendrick never ceased to represent that which he believed in, but lost his visage, his dignity, his kingdom, his mind, and his soul, ultimately left with nothing but the acceptance of his own inescapable fate.
Compared to the both of them, Allant is still the most on the nose, because unlike the rest we see that glorious legend. We meet it and fight it before we then deal with the reality of what is left of that same legend. Allant is not a once great, now faded light. He is a blazing pyre snuffed out right in front of our eyes. We go back to back from the peak of his tyrannical and power-mad glory, to a wretched and pathetic abomination pleading for mercy and understanding he does not deserve.
.................................................................................................................................... sigh
There. It’s done.
Ideally I would either now go into how Bloodborne does this amazingly as well with its final boss, but i don't want to spoil it. Not even tagged. Bloodborne has what might be my absolute favorite final boss in all video games, both because of themes discussed here and so many other merits, and I don't want to spoil it for anyone under any circumstance. I don’t care if it’s a 7 year old game (oh god my back), I won’t be the person to spoil that experience for anyone, invested or otherwise. Of course, I could go into the much more willing to spoil Lady Maria because just about EVERYONE knows about her, and from what I’ve seen of Elden Ring she might even have been a sort of “Proof of Concept” for Melania, or I could talk about how Maria is an inverse of this philosophy of “fading glory” and how she stands against the idea of holding onto such…
….but i think i already spent far too long on this, especially when for all i know you were in fact referring to a gameplay mechanic in which case this completely unsolicited WHY DID I WRITE THIS-
#long post#very long post#wall of text#literal essay#I realized how stupid this was around the 1.8k mark but i also knew it was too late to back out by then#This isn't even systematic like I claimed but ya know I only have one life to live so-#i can talk about why Maria and Artorias are such iconic characters some other time#same goes for Abyss Walkers and Burnt Ivory King#I spent multiple hours too many on this#writing analysis#video games#game design#video game analysis#writing shit#dark souls#dark souls 2#dark souls 3#demon's souls#bloodborne#elden ring#fromsoft#soulsborne#never let me do this again#never thought i’d get an ask#YOU HAD BETTER APPRECIATE THIS I CHECKED THE WORD COUNT ITS FCKING 4075#vendrick#father gascoigne#gwyn lord of cinder#king allant#normally im not one for mass tagging BUT I EARNED THESE TAGS DAMNIT
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Uncalled they come to me, and told, they still won’t leave me (Din Djarin/Soulmate!Reader)
Spoilers for Chapter 9 (S2E1) of the Mandalorian
Summary: After the ambitious Toro Calican turns on you, his hired mechanic, in hopes of winning favour with the Guild, the mysterious Mandalorian saves your life. Now that you owe him a life debt, he’s stuck with you until you can save him back. It’s not so bad, having a free mechanic and babysitter for the kid, but things take a turn for the worse when both of you realise you might be catching feelings. For someone that might not even be your Soulmate.
Requested by Anon: Hello! How’re you doing? May I please request a Din x reader soulmate au? The one where you don’t see color until you touch your soulmate? It would be very difficult for Din to find his soulmate and I’ve always wanted to see how it played out. If not that’s ok! Thank you and have a wonderful day ❤️
Key: (Y/N) - your name, (h/c) - hair colour, (e/c) - eye colour Translations: vode - siblings, Ret’urcye mhi - goodbye (literally: may we meet again), mirshmure’cya - brain-kiss (Basic term, is Keldabe kiss. This is the soft one as opposed to the literal headbutt term) Asked to be tagged in this disaster: @pearlll09 Word Count: remember when i said this would be 4k? Yeah. It’s 6,478 words. What. The. Fuck.
Author’s Note: this is way longer than I intended it to be but I think u deserve it since u were the only one who saw my post begging for mando requests and actually sent one hksjlfdkj tysm!! I’m so happy I got to write a Soulmate AU for him tbh. Btw, I have it in my head that Yodito would’ve given him the ability to see green, as a familial Soulmate bond, but it wouldn’t work for this if your eyes are green so I just left it out. (Also wtf is up with the Cobb/Din shit, Cobb is clearly in a dedicated relationship with the bartender Weequay. I named them Sala :D) The title is from The Teller of Tales by Gabriela Mistral.
Read On AO3
*
“Do you wear those gloves all the time?”
The Mando gives you a look—one that you can’t read, obviously, but you get the idea that it’s drier than the desert you’re in.
Calican snorts, but you shoot him a glare and he shuts up. You’re only here because he’s paying well for your mechanical skills, enough that his request of an extra hand on his first bounty seemed reasonable. Finding out that he’s hunting Fennec Shand was...less than pleasing, but now that the Mando is onboard, you’re not quite so worried about the outcome. They’re supposed to be fearsome warriors, after all. And he was smart enough to figure out how to wait out Shand, which is what the three of you have been doing for hours.
“I’m just saying,” you continue, “between the armour and the gloves, it must be damn near impossible to find your Soulmate.”
He shrugs. Sort of. It’s kind of hard to tell, to be honest.
“Haven’t you heard the stories?” Calican asks, flopping back onto the sand. “Mandalorians don’t have Soulmates. They start seeing colour after their first battle; war is their only destiny.”
You roll your eyes. They’re folk tales, really, and ridiculous ones at that. Every sentient has at least one Soulmate, romantic, platonic, familial, or otherwise, and there’s no reason for Mandalorians to be any different. Still, the stories make their rounds. There are specific ones, too, like the one about the Mandalorian Jedi who made the Darksaber; he was said to see colour when he lit his weapon for the first time. Fett, too, was said to have seen a new colour with every clone that was decanted—which is mildly ridiculous.
“Maybe the Mandalorians of old,” Mando comments with a scoff. “Not many of us see battle these days.”
“Well, if you’re looking for it, I know a krayt dragon a few hundred klicks away,” you suggest lightly.
He snorts. “No thanks. I’ll take the assassin.”
“Speaking of,” you said, “you guys know I’m just a mechanic, right?”
There’s a pause. Calican nods, but the Mando is still.
“What?” he asks, displeasure in his voice.
“I mean, I’m pretty good with a blaster, but I’m gonna be useless against Fennec Shand.”
Mando whirls on Calican. “You paid a mechanic to be your back-up? Are you insane?”
He shrugs. “(Y/N) has a mean right hook.”
“That’s not reassuring,” Mando huffs. He looks over at you and you can almost feel him glaring through the visor. “Are you crazy?”
“I’m broke,” you scoff. “Same thing. Oh, hey, do you need repairs on that hunk of junk you pilot? I’ll be more thorough than that lady at the hangar.”
He hesitates. “We’ll see.”
You grin. That’s not a no.
*
“You’re a prick, did I mention that?” you hiss over your shoulder.
Calican shoves the blaster into your side. “Shut up and keep walking.”
The Mandalorian stands on the other side of the hangar, waiting for Calican to make his move. Seriously, this day could not be going any worse. After killing Shand, Toro Calican, certified dumbass, decided that kidnapping you and the Mandalorian’s—pet? Child?—passenger was the best way to go. Whatever the little weird thing that’s in your arms is, it’s pretty cute, and you’d rather he shoot you than the baby holding tightly onto your shirt. In fact, he probably will, because the kid is his ticket into the Guild—you’re just dead weight.
“Looks like I’m calling the shots now. Huh, partner?” Calican asks the Mando. “Drop your blaster and raise ‘em.”
The Mandalorian puts his hands behind his head. Next to you, Calican pushes Peli forward and instructs her to cuff him. With a huff, she moves behind the Mandalorian with the intent to follow orders.
“You’re a Guild traitor, Mando,” Calican begins. You consider sighing. This sounds like the start of a villain monologue. “And I’m willing to bet that this here is the target you helped escape. Fennec was right. Bringing you in won’t just make me a member of the Guild, it’ll make me legendary.”
In a burst of light, the Mandalorian sets off a flash grenade.
You yelp and tuck the little thing into your arms before tucking yourself over into a roll down the ramp of the ship. You fall into the sand just in front of the Mandalorian, who’s moved to fire a shot at Calican, sending him flying off the other side, smouldering.
Breathing heavily, you sit up, the child still in your arms.
“Are you okay? Is the child?”
You look up. The Mandalorian has his gloved hand held out, offering to help you up. Hesitantly, you take it and pull yourself off the ground.
“We’re both okay—I think,” you say hesitantly, holding the baby out to him. “Is he—?”
“Dead,” the Mando confirms, taking the child from you.
You frown. “Good riddance. Thank you,” you tell him hesitantly, though your tone is genuine.
“It’s nothing,” he murmurs.
He distracts himself by checking on the child, who coos up at him contentedly. You smile a little at the interaction, but put yourself back into focus.
“It’s not nothing,” you say firmly. “I owe you a life debt.”
He freezes. “What?”
“Where I come from, if someone saves your life, you owe it to them. Until I can save your life, I owe you,” you explain.
“That’s—you don’t need to do that,” he says quickly.
You cross your arms. “It’s like your Way. It’s my culture, my honour on the line. You’re stuck with me, Mando.”
“What? No. Can’t you...pay me, or something?”
“I’m broke, remember?”
“You saved the child’s life, doesn’t that count?”
Your eyebrows shoot up. “I rolled with him. You did the work, so, no, it doesn’t count, even though he’s your…” You hesitate, remembering the word. “...foundling.”
“You know, you’re kind of getting the better end of the deal here,” Peli pipes up, directing the thought at the Mandalorian. “A free mechanic, babysitter, and an extra blaster? That’s a bargain.”
“Uh...pre-warning, I don’t know much about child care,” you warn immediately.
He snorts. “Neither do I.” After a moment, he sighs deeply. “Fine. But we’re going to work on those blaster skills before you become a liability.”
“Fair enough.”
*
Sticking with the Mandalorian is probably the worst decision of your life.
Almost immediately after Tatooine, in need of more funds, he drags you into trouble with another group of bounty hunters and the New Republic, of all groups.
“Who is this?” someone asks, her voice sing-song as she enters the Mandalorian’s ship.
You don’t bother turning around, continuing your repairs on a hull panel. “The mechanic. Don’t touch anything.”
“You have a personal mechanic?”
A few people enter the ship, making you finally turn around. The first speaker is a Twi’lek woman and the second a Human, who squints disdainfully. From behind him, Mando pushes past their little crew—including a protocol droid and a massive Devaronian—to approach you, deciding to stand next to you rather than them, which brings you immense pleasure for some reason.
“No. (Y/N) owes me a life debt and, apparently, credits don’t cut it,” he explains shortly, sounding frustrated and exhausted.
You nudge him companionably—it’s an argument you’ve had a few times, the paying of your debt. He doesn’t want to be free of you, per se, but he doesn’t want you to be in his debt. Having that kind of power or hold over you makes him uncomfortable, you can tell, as every time it comes up he gets twitchy.
“Kinky,” the Twi’lek snickers.
You grimace. That would explain why Mando sounds like he wants to die. “Fun group. What’s the job?”
“One of theirs got caught. We’re getting him out,” he says. “And we’re using our ship.”
Our ship. Maybe it’s a slip of the tongue or maybe he’s making it clear that you’re with him, but either way, it brings a smirk to your face. The Twi’lek looks disgusted.
“Well, at least my hard work won’t be going to waste,” you huff.
“Mando,” the Twi’lek interrupts, “you haven’t introduced us.”
You can feel him rolling his eyes. “(Y/N), meet Mayfeld, Burg, Xi’an. Mayfeld is running point, the droid is flying, and the target is a New Republic transport ship.”
“Ugh. You guys better be good; I���m not getting arrested.”
“Mayfeld’s former Imperial,” Mando says before any of them can answer.
You scoff. “A stormtrooper? My shitty blaster skills would be better than his.”
“I wasn’t a stormtrooper,” Mayfeld spits, annoyed enough that he must’ve said it once already. “Let’s get this show on the road.”
All but the droid stay, scattered around the hull. Mando follows soon after the jump to hyperspace, having hovered over the droid while it set their course. He stops Burg from getting into the weapons cache right after he hops down the ladder and the two look like they want to kill each other.
“Someone tell me why we even need a Mandalorian,” the Devaronian grunts.
Mayfeld huffs. “Well, apparently, they’re the greatest warriors in the galaxy. So they say.”
“Then why are they all dead?”
They all laugh at that—Xi’an with a particularly nasal one, which is irritating beyond belief. You frown deeply, but try not to show how pissed their laughter makes you. That sort of shit isn’t to be made fun of; a dying race. It’s all too familiar these days, what with the death of Alderaan and the crater on Scarif.
When you come back into focus, Xi’an is talking in low tones.
“See, I know who you really are,” she says to the Mando.
You roll your eyes. Unlikely.
(Something in your brain goes: I do, which is stupid. You don’t know who he is, under that helmet, sure, but you’ve seen a lot of him through his actions. He’s reckless, terrifying, and a badass, but he’s also patient and...kind, in his own way. The way he treats the child is like nothing you’ve seen in another bounty hunter. It’s gentle, caring. The kid has really grown on him, you think. And the way he treats you is just straight up polite, even though you’re practically his servant in terms of a life debt. Still, he treats you like a person and doesn’t ask you to do unreasonable favours just because he saved your life. He doesn’t hold it over your head.)
And then they start goading him about the helmet.
Burg actually goes for it, which Mando beats him back for. You jump forward, but just as you do, the door to the sleeping cot flies open, revealing the child.
Instead, you rush to the child, pulling him into your arms.
“What is that?” Mayfeld asks, approaching.
“Back off,” you hiss.
He looks between you and Mando. “Wait, did you two make that?” When you scoff, he frowns. “What is it, like a pet or somethin’?”
“Yeah. Something like that,” Mando says quickly.
Xi’an frowns. “Didn’t take you for the type. Maybe that code of yours has made you soft.”
You snort. Soft. That isn’t a word you’d use to describe him, ever. You haven’t seen very much action since Tatooine, but you saw enough there.
Mayfeld reaches for the child and, without hesitation, you lift your blaster. The way he’s looking at the little guy makes you uneasy.
“Fuck off,” you warn instantly.
“Aw, c’mon, I just wanna hold him,” he teases.
Over the comms, the droid’s voice echoes. “Dropping out of hyperspace. Now.”
The entire ship shudders and shakes, sending everyone flying off their feet. You happen to ram into beskar, your face slamming into the metal, which makes you yelp. The baby wails in your arms as gravity makes to tug you away again. Before it can, Mando grabs your arms and holds you in place against him until the ship is steady once more.
“You okay?” he asks, helping you to your feet—again, you think miserably.
“Ugh, no,” you groan, putting a hand on the left side of your face. “That’s gonna bruise.”
Mando takes the child from you. “Sorry. We’ll deal with it after.”
You wave him off. “I’ve had worse. You worry about the job, I’ll watch the kid,” you say, taking the child back. You can’t help but smile when he coos happily.
“Right,” Mando mutters. For a moment, he watches you both, considering.
“Mando!” calls Mayfeld. “Let’s go!”
Before he goes, he puts a hand on your shoulder. “Be careful. I have a bad feeling about this.” You nod, which seems to appease him, and watch him leave.
Petting the child’s floppy ears, you wonder if he meant that to be as comforting as it was.
*
I should’ve known, Din thinks when Qin walks out of that cell.
I definitely should’ve known, he decides, returning to the Razor Crest to find a sparking droid corpse and a shaking child in your arms.
He tosses the cuffed Twi’lek to the side and rushes to yours, stepping over Zero’s limp form. You look relatively unfazed, for someone who’s just ripped a droid’s head off with their bare hands, but the child is rather distressed. The kid squeaks at the sight of Din and, much to his surprise, lifts your hand to show him.
It’s bleeding.
“What did you do?” Din questions, crossing the hull for his medical kit.
“I...may have tried to punch the droid,” you admit hesitantly. “It didn’t work.”
He scoffs, returning to kneel in front of you with bacta patches in his hands. “No karking shit.”
Your face falls as he reaches for your hand, pulling it toward him so he can patch it up. “It was gonna hurt the kid.”
“You did good,” he murmurs. “Stupid, but good.”
It never occurred to him that you might save the child again. You’re here out of necessity, after all, because you owe him, because your honour depends on paying that debt. The child is just another being in the vicinity, but you still saved him. Again. You’re either very stupid or very kind and he can’t decide which one is more concerning.
“Maybe you should teach me a bit of hand to hand, too,” you suggest warmly, wincing at the bacta’s sting.
Din makes a noise that’s sort of a laugh. “I’ll add it to the list.”
He moves to put bacta on the bruise his beskar gave you—He feels ridiculously guilty for that; here you are, paying off a life debt to him, and he still manages to hurt you—but with a hand, you stop him.
“Don’t waste it,” you say immediately. “I’ve had worse bruises, seriously.”
He frowns. “It’s not a waste.” Before you can protest, he puts the patch on top of the bruise.
You huff. “You’re a worrier, aren’t you, Mando?”
“Apparently,” he replies dryly. He hadn’t realised it, either.
“Will you stop flirting and get us out of here!?” Qin shouts from the other side of the hull. “The New Republic will be on our asses!”
You roll your eyes. “I hate to say it, but he has a point. Where are the others?”
“Dealt with,” he says simply. “It was a double-cross.”
“Well, I figured,” you shoot back with a knowing look. “Let’s get the hell out of here.”
The drop is easy enough, especially since Din knows that New Republic signal is beeping steadily from Qin’s pocket. He escapes quickly, dipping back into the Razor Crest, where you wait at the top of the ramp, the child hanging onto your boot.
“Let’s go,” he declares, the ramp shutting behind him as he enters.
“Already?” you question with a raised eyebrow. “There are a few repairs I could make out of hyperspace that might be useful.”
He waves you toward the cockpit. “Later. We need to leave.”
“Oookay.” You frown but do as he says, plucking the child from off your foot. “C’mon, little guy,” you mutter to him.
Din waves away all your questions as he starts the take-off. Finally, when the Razor Crest is a safe distance away from the space station and X-Wings appear out of hyperspace, he glances back at you.
“Holy shit!” you cry as they open fire. You look back at him with a slack jaw, which makes him smile underneath the helmet. “That was you, wasn’t it?”
He shrugs half-heartedly, but it’s enough of an answer.
“You’re a maniac, Mando,” you laugh, watching the scene through the transparisteel.
Din thinks over it, staring at you for a long moment. There’s light in your eyes—maybe it’s the reflection of the explosion, but it’s captivating.
“Din,” he says.
You look over. “Hm?”
He clears his throat, trying to shove aside nerves. “My name. It’s Din.”
“Oh. Oh,” you repeat, eyes wide. Then, you smile, more genuine than he’s ever seen from you, he thinks. “You’re crazy, Din. You know that, right?”
He laughs—and that’s the first time you’ve heard a proper one from him. “Yeah. Yeah, I know.”
*
When Din drops a pair of gloves in front of you, you laugh.
“You’re telling me the gloves are out of convenience?” you ask him disbelievingly.
“The more skin you cover, the less likely you are to get cut up by a vibroblade,” he replies dryly. “Put them on.”
You raise your hands in surrender and take them, slipping them over your fingers. “Surprisingly comfy.”
It occurs to you that this is...sort of a big deal. You’ve kept your hands bare for as long as you can remember, mostly because you’re a romantic and finding your Soulmate has been at the forefront of your mind for a long time. But now, you think, it’s not such a big deal. You have a debt to pay and, besides that, you’re pretty happy with how things are now.
Life isn’t exactly nice with Din and the kid, so to say, but you’re content. You love the child and he adores you. The Razor Crest feels more like home than any planet ever has. And Din is...well, he’s something. Being around him is mildly addicting and whenever he’s gone, something feels incomplete.
“Better?” you ask, lifting your gloved hands.
“Much,” he says. Then, he holds out his own hand. “C’mon, up.”
You take the hand without thought, but before you know it, he’s swinging you around and shoving you to the ground.
“Ow!” you cry. “What the hell, Din?”
He huffs. “Lesson 1: Never take anything for granted.”
“Rude.” You hit his arm meaningfully, but he just rolls his eyes; just because you can’t see it doesn’t mean you can’t tell it’s happening.
“You’ll thank me someday.”
“But not today.”
“Nope. Today, you’re gonna hate my guts.”
*
He’s dying.
It feels unreal, what with everything you’ve watched him survive so far. A newbie bounty hunter, a group of pissed off bounty hunters, lots of bounty hunters, and the New Republic but a group of stormtroopers is what gets him?
Moff Gideon is what really gets him, though. The bastard that helped destroy his people is going to destroy Din Djarin. Hearing him speak Din’s name makes you nauseous, furious, even. He gave you that name in confidence, trusted it to you, the only one of his handful of friends to even use it, and Gideon decides to declare it to Nevaroo in its entirety. It makes your blood boil, enough that you get out of the initial firefight mostly unscathed.
But Din doesn’t. And now he’s dying in your arms and you feel like you failed.
“Go with them,” he tells you, all croaky and half-assed.
“No. No, I’m not leaving you here,” you declare, carefully leaning him against the rubble.
Flames flicker all around the room and the child is crying. It’s not loud or consistent, but it’s enough to break your heart.
“You have to go,” Din says again. “You’ll die.”
You laugh ruefully. “That’s kind of the point. A life debt means I save your life or I die trying.”
A pause.
“You have got to be fucking kidding me,” he hisses through the pain.
“Afraid not, dumbass. You’re stuck with me, remember?”
He grasps your arm, his hands still gloved. If you’re going to die here, maybe you should ask him to take off the gloves. A part of you has wondered…
“C’mon, tell me it’s transferable—some ‘dying wish’ shit like that.”
You nod, though the action sinks uncomfortably into your chest. Leaving him here...that doesn’t sit well with you. But if he asks, then you’ll do it. “Yeah, you name it, but it’d better be a big one, something equivalent.”
The breath he lets out is one of relief. “Take care of the kid. Go find his people and return him to them. Protect him.”
“With my dying breath,” you swear, the words holding an air of ceremony.
Din grasps your arm tighter and pulls you down, your forehead meeting his helmet. You’re not sure what it means, but it must mean something because he mutters words in his own language, which you’ve never heard him do before.
“Ret’urcye mhi.”
May we meet again.
Din does what little he can in saying goodbye to you, as deeply as that cuts. You’ve grown on him, a little too much maybe, and it kills him to think that you’ll be without him now. You still can’t hit a headshot, he realises, suddenly worried for how you’ll fare.
And so he gives you what he can: a Keldabe kiss and a goodbye, instead of the action he wants to take. He wants to take off his gloves and see if he can figure out the colour of your eyes. On the other hand, though, he doesn’t want to leave you with that, of all things, to leave you seeing the red of his blood and the blue-tinged orange of the flames before any other colours.
You take the child in your arms and, with one last glance at Din, leave the room for the covert’s tunnels underground.
The child whimpers up at you.
You look down, sniffling, and pet his ears gently. “I know, little one. I’m so sorry.” You place a gentle kiss to his forehead.
Cara appears, tugging on your wrist. “C’mon,” she says gently. “We need to get out of here.”
It occurs to you, as the three of you and Greef move on, that Cara might help you with the child. For Din, obviously. She’s a good person and, frankly, she and Din seem pretty friendly. The second she saw you, she’d offered her bare hand and bemoaned the fact that her vision was still black and white, much to your amusement. It was all in good fun, but Din had looked a little uncomfortable, for reasons you didn’t know.
“(Y/N),” Cara says quietly, calling your attention back.
You shake yourself from your thoughts. “Sorry.”
She smiles sadly. “It’s okay. Just keep up.”
The small group turns a few corners before footsteps sound from behind. You immediately place the child in the bag hanging from Cara’s shoulder and draw your blaster, watching her and Greef do the same.
From the distant hall, two figures approach: IG-11 and—
“Din!” you half-cry, half-breathe out. Holstering your blaster, you meet them halfway to take more of Din’s weight from IG. “How—?”
“No living thing can see me without my helmet. IG isn’t alive,” Din says dryly.
You laugh, a partly manic sound. “Thank kark. You’re not getting out of this that easy.”
The noise he makes is both amused and resigned. “Wouldn’t dream of it. Where’s the—?”
“He’s with Cara,” you say, finishing the thought before even he can, in his groggy state.
It’s safe to say that when the Armourer gives him his sigil, Din almost considers correcting the Clan of two to a Clan of three. He doesn’t, reminding himself that you’re here because of a debt and nothing else, but the thought is there.
*
The months after Nevarro are more peaceful than the first week of your time with Din.
You finally get to pull a proper sleeping space together for yourself. Well, it’s a hammock in the hull, but it’s better than the seats in the cockpit. The child gets his own hammock, too, though it’s in the cot space with Din. He loves it, so much so that he squeals when he sees it. That’s your proudest moment, for sure.
Most days, you tend to forget that you still owe a life debt. To be honest, it just feels like the three of you are normal. Din takes bounties, you take short mechanic jobs on different planets, and the two of you trade off on child-duty. It’s pretty regular, more than what your life used to be, anyway.
Din is still training you in hand-to-hand and blasters, of course. You’re getting better with the latter, but the first is difficult. On the way to Tatooine, where there’s supposedly another Mandalorian, he decides to have another training session.
“Fists higher, do it again.”
Huffing, you wipe your wrist across your sweaty forehead. It’s easy enough to obey the order—the first part, anyway. Getting into his guard is difficult, though.
One hit, two blocks—there. You slip under his guard and make an abrupt drop to the ground, sweeping his legs out under him with a fierce movement. He goes down in a tumble of beskar, joining you on the floor. As soon as he’s down, you flip over and straddle his hips, an arm over his neck in false threat.
He barks out a laugh. “Much better.”
“I’m not entirely hopeless!” you declare joyfully before bursting into snickers.
Leaning down, you thunk your forehead against his helmet. The gesture is fond, you’ve learned, something shared between close companions—or at least you think. Din told you that it’s called a mirshmure’cya in Mando’a, that it doesn’t have an equivalent word in Basic.
(Which is technically true. Literally, it means brain-kiss, but the outsider term for it is Keldabe kiss. It can be used for close companions—vode in arms, family—but it’s also used for romantic partners, so he’s mildly horrified at the idea of explaining its cultural significance to you and having to face his feelings for someone that may or may not be his Soulmate. He hasn’t gotten up the courage to ask if he can check. Or try to do it discreetly.)
A distant beeping starts up, coming from the cockpit. It’s the approach warning, which means the training session is over.
“I’ll get the kid,” you say, climbing off Din and offering a hand.
He takes it without hesitation, dragging himself up and making a beeline for the cockpit.
Tatooine is about what you remember. That is, it’s dry, sandy, and the worst planet you’ve ever been on. Stepping out of the ship and into the hangar makes you smile, though, at the not-so-distant memory of Din saving your life. It hasn’t been that long, but it feels like it’s been years.
“Oh, hey!” says Peli, after greeting the child—which is fair, he’s adorable. “You’re still with him! Haven’t repaid that debt yet, huh?”
Your face falls. “Uh, no, not really.”
On the way to Mos Pelgo, your thoughts linger on the life debt. One of these days, you’re going to save Din’s life—then where will you be? Will he want you to leave? What will you do if you have to leave? Your old life was nowhere near as interesting as this, nor did you have anyone close to what Din and the child are to you.
The dreary grey slopes of sand only make it easier to think of the worst possible outcomes. Now you remember why you hated Tatooine so much.
You don’t even realise the speeder is approaching the small town until Din taps your arm, which is wrapped around his waist. Jumping at the touch, you loosen your grip sheepishly and glance at the child, who looks like he’s enjoying himself immensely.
After the speeder comes to a stop, you take the kid while Din enters the cantina.
When you enter yourself, you find that he’s about to shoot someone, while the Weequay behind the bar looks rather distressed.
“Perfect timing, as always,” Din remarks without a glance.
You raise your free hand. “You’re the bad luck charm, I’m just here for the ride,” you retort teasingly.
“You brought a kid to a gunfight?” his opponent asks, raising an eyebrow.
Finally, you glance over at him and see why Din looks ready to kill him. He’s in Mandalorian armour but his helmet is off—clearly, he’s not Mandalorian. “You’re wearing beskar and you’re not a Mandalorian, buddy. I think you’re in more trouble than the kid is.”
“He is,” Din gets out, a twinge of viciousness in his voice.
Before they can even reach for their blasters, though, the ground starts to shake.
You grab onto the doorway for support, eyes wide as you grip the child. Din and the Mandalorian poser move toward the door, joining you and staring out at the street outside.
The entire planet feels like it rumbles and chaos reigns outside.
Something is moving the sand—coming toward the town.
“Holy fuck,” you whisper as it goes by, shifting the sand like it’s an ocean rather than earth. It flies out of the ground, sharp teeth the only thing you see as it consumes a bantha whole.
When it’s gone, the poser huffs. “Maybe we can work something out.” He turns to you, offering a hand, which is covered by fingerless gloves. “Cobb Vanth. I’m the Marshal here.”
You take it hesitantly, glad that things are still black and white when you make contact. “(Y/N).”
He notices your hesitation and chuckles. “The Weequay in there is Sala, my Soulmate. I’ll see if they can’t whip up something for the kid; I’m sure he’s starving.”
“Very,” you say, just before he goes to leave.
When it’s just you and Din, you look over at your companion. “Krayt dragon, huh?”
“Yep,” he sighs, already sounding tired.
You laugh. “I know I said I could bring you to one when we met, but I was totally kidding.”
He looks over at you and you can feel the low-level glare behind the visor, but it only makes you snicker. “I hate you.”
“You’re so full of shit,” you retort immediately.
*
You finally get to repay your debt.
It’s not what you’re thinking about when you shove Din out of the way of the krayt’s projectile venom, but it’s repaid nonetheless.
Din doesn’t think of it immediately, either, as he’s rather more concerned with the fact that you’re sent flying across the desert into a pile of debris and sharp rocks.
“(Y/N)!”
Before he can run to you, Cobb grabs his arm. “The dragon!”
To be honest, killing the dragon feels like a bonus when he pulls himself together and figures out a plan. When the great beast explodes, the Tuskens and the villagers cheer, but Din races back to the place he saw you last. He pushes aside the remains of one of those massive weapons they built to find you, laying on the ground. For a moment, panic clutches his heart, but then you groan.
“Am I dead?” you ask.
Din lets out a breath, hardly managing it, as he kneels next to you. “Dumbass.”
“Because it feels like I’m dead.”
“Dumbass,” he repeats, ripping your shirt away to find a deep cut in your side, just above your hip. “Of all the ways to pay your debt—”
You sit up, wincing. “Oh,” you say, as if you hadn’t realised it, “I guess I did that, too.”
Din’s heart is still beating a million klicks a second at how close you were to being dead, but for a second, it flips, realising that you hadn’t saved him just to pay the debt. And then, as he’s helping you off the ground and bringing you toward the others, who have bacta patches ready, his heart sinks.
Your debt is paid. You don’t have any reason to stay with him and the kid. As soon as you get back to the city, he’s going to have to watch you leave.
Shit. He didn’t think this through.
Meanwhile, you’re on the same train of thought. Does he really think you saved him for the debt? Does he want you gone that bad? It makes sense. You’re a pain in the ass, with all the training you need. But...well, you thought he might’ve—
“I’ve changed my mind,” you declare.
Din, terrified, attempts to sound neutral. “About?”
“The worst job we’ve ever taken. This is definitely it,” you huff as he helps you down onto a smoother boulder, taking patches from a Tusken.
He goes to use them, but you raise a hand.
“If you even think about getting near my wound with those nasty gloves, I’m going to skin you,” you threaten.
Frankly, Din is too shaken to even laugh. The silence lays there, stilted, as he removes his gloves and sits somewhat behind you, on another close stone. You’ve taken yours off, too, seeing as one is ripped all the way through.
He’s careful with the bacta patch and his bare hands, making sure not to touch your skin.
Now, of all moments, would be the worst time to find out that you really don’t have a reason to stay.
While he works, he thinks, briefly, that he should say something. “(Y/N),” he starts to say. “I—”
But that happens to be the moment he’s putting the bacta patch on. You suck in a sharp breath through your teeth, wincing. Your hand flies out, reaching for something to ground you. Of course, because something out there has it out for you, you grab his hand, forgetting that his gloves are, for once in his life, not there.
You realise, ridiculously, that his hand is warm.
And then the world around you explodes into colour.
The faded yellow of the surrounding desert is overwhelming with how it burns into your eyes alongside the brilliant blue of the sky. The surrounding Tuskens are in browns and greys, simple things, but so, so beautiful to your new sight. You breathe out, a shaky action.
Behind you, Din comes to see the same, but his gaze is stuck on the back of your head—the (h/c) of your hair and how the light catches in it, despite it being a complete mess.
You barely have the breath to gasp, but you do, whirling around to face him.
His beskar is beyond what you’d pictured: a shining, sparkling silver that could stand out on a star. No wonder rooms fall silent at the sight of him.
Din has the same thought about your eyes. On death’s door, all he’d wanted was to know what colour they are and now he knows, but it feels so useless now. He doesn’t even know what to call them. Sure, (e/c) would work, however weakly. You are...something else. You always have been, but now it’s like he can see it, the beauty of who you are so plainly painted into your features.
Din doesn’t even have the time to be afraid of your reaction before the words are slipping out. “I don’t want you to go.”
You just stare at him for a long moment, words processing.
It...kind of freaks him out.
He jumps when you fling yourself at him, arms wrapped around his shoulders in the tightest hug he’s ever gotten. Immediately, he responds, clutching the back of your shirt like it’ll save his life.
“Thank the Force,” you breathe out, just beside where his ear is under the helmet. “I don’t wanna leave.”
Din lets out a breath of relief and tugs you closer so you’re practically sitting on his lap. It can’t be comfortable, but you don’t seem to mind. When you do finally pull away, it’s to press your forehead against his helmet. It sends a swell of affection through him again, your constant Keldabe kisses. He taught you something important to his culture, to him, and here you are, using it without thought.
“Is it too late to tell you that this is the Mandalorian equivalent of a kiss?” he murmurs, more than a little embarrassed.
You laugh softly, arms reaching to rest around his neck. “And I thought you were so cool.”
“I just blew up a krayt dragon,” he argues.
“Oh, you’re plenty badass, Din,” you tease back, “just...not smooth.”
He huffs. “I’m gonna kick your ass next training session.”
A grin comes over your face and, for a second, he can’t comprehend why that would make you smile—until he realises that he just promised a next time. You’d genuinely believed he wanted you gone and Din thought you wanted to leave, but neither of you were right.
A whine from below catches both your attention.
The child reaches up from the ground, making grabby hands.
You laugh, a noise Din echoes quietly, and pluck him from the ground, holding him in your careful hands. “Hey, buddy. Feeling left out?”
He squeaks a confirmation, his little hands—green hands, you realise, deeply amused—reaching for Din’s helmet. Once he has a comfortable hand, he bashes his head against the helmet.
Din yelps, not out of pain, but concern, grabbing for the kid, who wobbles dizzily.
“Oh, shit—” Din says.
“Woah, woah,” you get out between wheezing laughs. “Don’t do that! His head is much harder than yours.”
The kid makes a weak huff and curls against Din’s chest stubbornly.
“I think that was an attempted kiss,” you suggest to Din.
Underneath his helmet, he grins. Petting the child’s head with a gentle finger, he looks back up at you. “It was cute.”
“Very,” you agree.
Without prompting, Din reaches for your hand again, a little hesitant. You take his gladly, running your thumb across his knuckles, which makes him shiver.
“Clan of three,” he whispers.
You lift your gaze. “Hm?”
“The Armourer, she said, ‘Clan of two’ when she gave me my sigil,” he explains. “I wanted to correct her then.”
The smile on your face is beyond words. “Clan of three has a ring to it. You’re stuck with me for good now, Din Djarin.”
He snorts and raises your hand to his helmet, touching it briefly to the metal in lieu of kissing it.
Tatooine might be the worst place in the universe, Din thinks that it doesn’t matter so much where he is. Sitting here, with you and the kid, he thinks that this might be home.
*
River’s Tags: @hahaboop & @mystoragehatesme
Masterlist
#din djarin x reader#din djarin x you#din djarin imagine#din djarin oneshot#sw x reader#sw imagine#sw oneshot#star wars x reader#star wars imagine#star wars oneshot#star wars fanfic#sw fanfic#din djarin fanfic#the mandalorian#the mandalorian x reader#the mandalorian imagine#the mandalorian oneshot#the mandalorian fanfic#that's the most tags ive used in a while#uncalled they come to me#rivika#river#generallynerdy#request#anon request#din djarin#star wars#sw
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Conner Kent in Suicide Squad/the Infinite Frontier era: wtf is going on
Alright lads hello I just need to type out some theories/thoughts about what’s going on with my boy Kon right now. This is more for myself than anything else (just trying to organize my thoughts) but since some of y’all like to hear me talk about comics (and some of this discussion has already been happenin in my inbox) I figured i’d format it and put it on here too! its like 4k words and written over the last few days mostly at 3am. sorry <3
this is basically just me going like
Also fair warning that like, I can be wrong and misinterpret things just as much as anyone else can, like I use panels to support why I think what I do but a lot of this stuff is subjective/complicated to understand so like... in general somethings should be taken with a grain of salt, especially because exactly what changes to the universe were made by Death Metal/Infinite Frontier haven’t been super super clearly defined yet. Also sometimes comic writers make the most random nonsensical shit happen, so I as a fan am also allowed to theorize about random nonsensical shit.
But to start: let’s backtrack!
Many months ago when Infinite Frontier was first announced they dropped some promotional art, and I remember being a little confused because. Well:
(Variant Cover spread for Justice League (2018) #59)
(Variant Cover spread for Superman (2018) #29)
Notice how Conner is back to his Teen Titans 2003 look up top, but in his YJ 2019 look at the bottom? This seemed weird to me! But then they announced that Conner would be part of the Suicide Squad ongoing title, in the T-shirt look, so I wrote this discrepancy off in my brain as ‘oh I guess that cover was just the last hurrah for punk Kon’ and moved on with life.
In Suicide Squad right away we learn he’s very much so there against his will:
(Suicide Squad (2021) #1)
Which corroborates more or less what we were also shown in Future State: Suicide Squad, although admittedly it tells... a slightly different version of the events. When I first saw both of these together I just chalked it up to being a bit inaccurate as it’s shown as a memory in Future State:
(Future State: Suicide Squad #2)
Issue 2 we saw him in action with the Squad, trying to do his best to still be a hero despite the team, but things get a little more interesting in the following issue. It starts off with an account of his history
(Suicide Squad (2021) #3)
This page gave me a few immediate red flags, mostly minor things that had to do with coloring, so more irl problems than things to take seriously in-universe (Kon’s pants are the wrong color in the first Superboy shot, and Bart’s Impulse costume is in Kid Flash colors instead of the correct Impulse ones) but then also it just bugged me the phrasing “he joined Young Justice” when he was a founder of the team, he didn’t join it he made it with Tim and Bart.
But again, chalked that stuff up to just.... writers/artists being inconsistent/unaware of things that they should be aware of, or even Nocturna just not being specific with details. But it did still strike me as a little odd considering the very accurate use of villains in those same shots, Scavenger who was a reoccurring bad guy from Kon’s solo days and showed up basically nowhere else (even holding the Spear of Lono and everything!) and Billy/Harm (Greta’s brother) from Young Justice.
But then a few pages later we got this:
(Suicide Squad (2021) #3)
Which is interesting. My first instinct was to think he’s being drugged w kryptonite or something thats leaving him hazy/out of it, but my thoughts on that have kinda changed, we’ll get there in a bit. But in general the context of ‘something’s wrong’ made the slight discrepancies on some details of his own history make more sense.
I also want to then bring up the next part to this story, the crossover issue in Teen Titans Academy.
(Teen Titans Academy #3)
So a few things. Does it feel weird to anyone else that Conner Kent, a known previous Titan who literally has a framed picture of himself in a case there, would set off alarm sensors like that? Wouldn’t he be... recognized as a Titan not an intruder by their sensors? Interesting! Anyways.
He looks really pained looking at that picture, and sad, and almost frustrated, which ya know makes sense and hurts my heart because he misses them! He misses his friends and being happy.
But, importantly for a criticism I wanna make thats less theory related and more just me bein annoyed at Tim Sheridan, that’s a picture of Conner. Right there. That’s Superboy, on display at Teen Titans Academy, so the people who frequent this building would know who he is and what he looks like and be able to recognize him, he’s even in the same outfit and everything. Alinta recognized him at the end of Suicide Squad #3.
So why does only one person during this big fight then comment on his presence?? Why doesn’t it get a bigger reaction???
(Teen Titans Academy #3)
And after the fight we don’t see any on panel moment of Wallace going up to the staff Titans (who weren’t present for the fight) and saying like “HEY NIGHTWING UHHH SUPERBOY WAS WITH THE SUICIDE SQUAD?” we just see him talking with his friends upset about Crush leaving. We see Alinta talking to them but we don’t see the exact dialogue. So I do just wanna take the writer by the shoulders and shake him a little bit and ask WHY because that just feels like... something you’d wanna address on panel! This is like the first time since joining the squad that Kon’s at all in contact with people from his life before Waller got involved, I feel like not addressing those people’s reactions to it/not discussing it at least a little bit on panel (especially when Conner CAME UP in the previous TTA issue, Dick brought him up and everything!!!) is a really odd choice. Maybe it’ll happen next issue and i’m just impatient, but who knows. Anyways, gripes with Sheridan aside, lets move on.
I wanna bring up how Conner... doesn’t really respond to Wallace’s question? At all? Except to just fight him off, not even an attempt at a ‘Sorry’ or anything? (the ‘Ha! That all you got?!’ seems to be coming from Culebra not Conner, although the placement of the bubble is vague enough it could be that it was supposed to be Conner? but it seems more like what she’d say, especially as she’s grabbing Emiko like that) That just feels weird. It feels off. In general he speaks so little in Suicide Squad #3 and this issue. Tbh it almost feels like he doesn’t really recognize Wallace which I mean I suppose they never exactly met (they would have theoretically during Death Metal, basically all past/present Titans were together for a while during that), but Kon’s been back in existing long enough he’d have a sense of who current heroes are anyways.
But right, so, lots of little things that feel weird... that gets us caught up to the most recently released comics... but in this household we look at solicits as they drop. Which gives us some info on what’s coming up a few months ahead of time, albeit without full context obviously. Issues #4 and #5 don’t mention Conner in their descriptions or show him on the covers at all, because there’s just other plot things going on, so ya know seems things will be quiet for him for a bit.
But then we got the August solicitations and oh BOY it’s a doozey for him! And some things start to kinda connect perhaps!
I want to just take a moment to look at that specific wording. “The teen calling himself Conner Kent” I’m probably reading too much into it but that feels deliberate, like why wouldn’t you just say ‘Conner Kent’? Usually these kinds of descriptions are trying to keep a low word count, not add in extra words that don’t need to be there. It makes it feel like that’s a name he’s using that... doesn’t actually belong to him.
So the theory I want to propose (that has been floating around already) is that based on these covers and the description, and how the Conner we’ve been seeing in Suicide Squad apparently talks about his own personal history like he’s ‘reading a wikipedia entry’ and had little response to people he should be aware of like Wallace and apparently isn’t recognized as a Titan through a bio-scan and also bearing in mind those initial promo arts with two separate looks at the same time for him... I think we're looking at a situation where the Conner in Suicide Squad so far has actually been a clone of original Conner (like... like he’s Match 2.0 or somethin) the whole time, that’s just not aware he’s not the original.
Now that’s the base theory I wanna work with and build off of, but there’s MANY different directions that could go in/ways that could work.
For example, one idea is that the Conner we saw in #1 who was chained up is the original Conner, and he’s been being cloned and held captive, so everything else with Conner in Suicide Squad so far has been this Match 2.0
Another idea could be the original Conner in #1 is also the Conner in #2 who Waller had then commented wasn’t ready during the mission in Arkham and had zapped with a lil Kryptonite, and after that moment she took him off the field because his spirit hadn’t been broken enough to be obedient (as he was a lot quieter in Issue #3 & the TTA crossover compared to #2, and #3 is when the Nocturna thing with the history happened)
Or it could even be original Conner in #1, then in #2 was one clone that wasn’t ‘ready’ that after that point she stopped using him, and switched to a diff clone for #3, because like that first cover did show a LOT of clones. That could be more just ‘artistic interpretation’ or something, covers sometimes do exaggerate/mislead, but it also could indicate we’re looking at a lot of clones.
(Suicide Squad (2021) #2)
With all of those in mind I also wanna bring up this little bit from Future State Suicide Squad:
(Future State: Suicide Squad #2)
Again Future State is a ‘possible future’ so stuff from it isn’t set in stone, but the idea of ‘she still has his YJ 2019 outfit somewhere’ makes me think it could be something along the lines of like, Clone!Conner finds original Conner and frees him and he gets back his YJ outfit, which could lead to like the imagery on that variant cover/the idea from my very first part of this post where I was talking about Kon being shown in both outfits in different places.
Alternatively entirely from all that, another option is that she maybe got ahold of what was needed to clone Kon, but doesn’t even have the original Kon in her possession. (again with the Future State thing, she could be lying since elsewhere in Future State we did also see a copy of YJ 2019 Kon’s costume in one of the Jon-focused Future State comics in a display case 🤷♂️) Which could also lead to that confrontation on the variant cover & the promo art thing... and could also explain why we have seen nothing about anyone looking for him, because in that sort of scenario he wouldn’t have even been missing in the first place.
There’s a lot of possibilities! It’s still too early to solidly know anything, but I feel pretty confident we’re entering another cloning related plot with our Clone Boy so it’s... ya know. Clone time. On the one hand it’s annoying because god we have done clone/multiple Kons plots before. We’ve done them so much.
BUT on the other hand, I think it could be interesting to use this situation to tie into some older stuff from pre-reboot that I can see some connections to, because due to Infinite Frontier altering the world and people’s memories it’s all technically fair game storytelling-wise again (and like, the use of Scavenger specifically in that flashback way above, who’s not a super well known villain in general, makes me think maaaaybe the writer did do some of their Kon homework)
Something also just dawned on me that i’m not quite sure what it means but still is worth mentioning: The Conner here in Suicide Squad is back in his Teen Titans Vol. 3 outfit, and his history as he tells it stops during Teen Titans Vol. 3. And doesn’t... mention when he died? It feels like it... stopped before that, because like I feel if he was telling his life history (even the wiki version LMAO) the part where he died and came back would be pretty important to bring up?? And Nocturna specifically says that he didn’t explain how that stuff from TT Vol. 3 then led to him in his current situation. That’s a pretty big gap (like uhhh everything from resurrection until he got lost on Gemworld + all the rest of the Young Justice 2019 stuff?) So like.. there could be something funky going on here that has to do with that.
Similarly when he flashes back in Future State: Suicide Squad to his past it also goes right from Teen Titans Vol. 3 to the current Suicide Squad run? Like I get it’s one page so they can’t show that much, but the fact that there’s now two places that flash back to that same specific time period and nothing past it until the Suicide Squad feels just... noticeable! Not concretely indicative of something, but noteworthy.
(Future State: Suicide Squad #2)
Like...this almost has me thinking maybe it could be something where like, they tampered with his dead body and cloned from that? BECAUSE, for those of you who may not be familiar with how Kon’s resurrection (during Final Crisis: Legion of 3 Worlds) worked, when he came back there was time travel involved! He was brought back to life in the future (like. Legion of Superheroes era) because it was a process that took that thousand or so years to work/heal him (essentially because of his hybrid dna the process that healed Clark when he had died back in Death of Superman/Reign of the Supermen in the 90s just took a lot longer, but its the same Kryptonian healing chamber thing) meaning when he came back to the present alive again, his dead body was still also in the present just in it’s process of healing. Meaning especially if we’re bringing back stuff from before the reboot, Kon likely has his dead body just vibing out there while he’s goin around living life 🤷♂️
SO them doing something related to that could explain the choice to put him back in the T-shirt (since thats what he wore in the era his brain would be caught up to if we’re relating this to when he died) and why he’d recognize himself in a group photo with Bart, Cassie and Tim but maybe not someone like Wallace who didn’t exist back then. I don’t know, this branch of thought is still half baked. Will maybe come back and elaborate on this later. But I’m now really thinking there might be a connection to the early Teen Titans Vol. 3 era specifically because of it being referenced twice in stuff with this Suicide Squad.
ANYWAYS moving on, this is probably a shot in the dark and I only thought of it because I just was reading 90′s Superboy, but right away when thinking about ‘Amanda Waller’ and ‘Cloning Kon’ I was reminded of some stuff about the circumstances around the first clone that was made of Conner: Match.
(Superboy (1994) #35)
Match was created by an organization called ‘The Agenda’, that was after a while primarily under the control of The Contessa, Lex Luthor’s ex-wife, aided by Amanda Spence who had a personal grudge against Kon bc her dad was Paul Westfield the guy Kon was originally cloned from (before the Lex/Clark retcon). They were the big bad guys of an arc called The Evil Factory in Superboy (where Cadmus personnel got replaced with clones) which also then tied into the Sins of Youth event over in Young Justice (Remember how Match was posing as Superboy for a while there? yeah). After those plot lines finished the Agenda was pretty defeated (Amanda Spence was still out there and came back later but still) and... who got their hands on the remaining Agenda tech?
(Superboy (1994) #87)
Why none other than Amanda Waller herself!
If they re-canonized pieces of this (which also tied into Young Justice which ya know, YJ 2019 was all about re-establishing stuff from YJ even before Death Metal happened soooo) it would totally make sense for Waller to have complete access to the exact technology used to clone Conner before.
Now, a thing to consider here though is what happened to Kon after he’d been cloned that first time, where his DNA got all destabilized by the process (and he needed to go through a procedure with Roxy as a genetic template to keep him together, which was how he got stuck at age 16 for a while). This was something where he was fine for a period of time before the side effects began to kick in. Now, I think it’s worth mentioning that was also back in the days where he was not yet Lex & Clark’s clone, but still Paul Westfield’s. So there could easily be a ‘now that certain Kryptonian genes have kicked in as he got his newer powers it doesn’t destabilize him the same way’ reasoning or something along those lines to avoid this problem. Alternatively, it could be an interesting thing to embrace rather than retcon away, especially if we’ve been seeing Clone Conner in action and Original Conner hasn’t been in our focus, things could be wrong with him that we just don’t know about.
Another branch of thinking that I think is even MORE a shot in the dark but could be interesting (or again even related to what I just said, could be a combo of things) is if this somehow ended up related to those clones that were reverse engineered from the remains of Match from the very end of Teen Titans Vol. 3
(Teen Titans (2003) #99)
All of them were then taken down with Kryptonite and killed in battle (by Rose & Damian)
(Teen Titans (2003) #100)
But like... idk man if Waller got her hands on those corpses or even just the data from Dr. Caligan that he extracted from Match to make them... that could also be a potential way to make some new Conner clones, and that could be why the bio-scan thing at Titans Tower wouldn’t work properly because of the thing he says above about it not being a “complete match’
One thing I don’t think is the case, but has been brought up to me, is stuff with New 52 Kon. I’ve talked extensively about New 52 Kon in recent weeks because I read through all his stuff, but the thing that makes me shy away from him being part of this situation is the fact that... he’s not interchangeable with Kon the way I think some people think he is. He wouldn’t visually be recognized as Original Kon because he is literally on a genetic level a separate person. They’d prob look related, sure, like they’d pass for brothers because they both have Clark’s DNA, but New 52 Kon has Lois’ DNA and Original Kon has Lex’s. New 52 Kon would likely look more like Jon, rather than Kon. Lois specifically commented in an Action Comics issue that Kon had some resemblance to Lex, even. So like, things like Wallace recognizing him or him looking at his own matching reflection alongside the group picture at the Tower... those wouldn’t happen the same way if this was New 52 Kon.
Now I think it coooould theoretically be possible for Waller to have gotten her hands on that future N.O.W.H.E.R.E. cloning tech that had been used to make New 52 Kon, like I wouldn’t rule that out. Because she knows where the remains of their bases are as shown in Red Hood and the Outlaws (2016) #16-17, and like, Harvest is dead so she could easily just send teams out there to gather shit if she wanted.
Onto some other things I don’t think are actually related but that I was reminded of/wanted to address:
I feel i’d be a bad timkon fan if during all of this discussion of past stories with cloning Kon I didn’t even bring up Tim’s cloning attempt stuff, but I think it would ultimately be unrelated. His tech was stolen from Luthor, and his attempts didn’t succeed because he was trying to build from scratch without Cadmus’ the data about how they altered the DNA from the original process.
(Teen Titans Vol. 3 #34)
Then that initial cover for the annual really reminded me of part of the Hollow Men story from Superboy Vol. 5 just with like... Kon in a room full of copies of himself. I don’t think this story would be related either because it was more magic Tannarak stuff rather than regular cloning, but ya know. It’s the imagery.
(Superboy Vol. 5 #9)
It also really reminded me of the stuff from Hyper-Tension which was hypertime stuff not cloning but again just... visually.
(Superboy Vol. 4 #62)
In general I don’t think we’re EVER gonna see Black Zero or any of these multiverse Superboys again LMAO.
To try to sum up all of this in a way that might make sense here’s kinda a... flowchart of some of my main ideas for what the cloning situation could be/how the logic could work. Again this is borrowing stuff from across continuities because Infinite Frontier means theoretically anything’s fair game. (Also I don’t think I mentioned this earlier but I do mention it in the chart, but I think it’s also reasonable that Waller could get her hands on Cadmus tech if Cadmus is like properly made canon again. She just has funky government connections!)
Also I just now thought of this now several hours after I already made the chart and I don’t wanna remake it so sorry not incorporating it there but I remembered there was also that bit during House of Kent where Clark took Kon to the Hall of Justice and they were running some tests on him, so I’m thinking it’s also possible Waller got ahold of that data/that might be how she found out about Kon in the first place for this timeline. And they indicated that there was something wrong with him there, where he might eventually lose his powers or something, so maybe she tried to do cloning stuff to be able to have a copy of Superboy in his prime or something??? before that started kicking in. I don’t know, just more things to consider:
(Action Comics (2016) #1028)
ANYWAYS in conclusion: there is clone fuckery of some sort happening, I’m curious where it’s gonna go, and I just want Kon to be okay.
If you actually read this uhm. props to you bc this probably makes no sense to anyone but me its just word vomit <3
#this is very long! and disorganized! i am sorry#this doesn't have one theory abt things it has like. many#its basically just brainstorming/spitballing ideas#i could also be entirely off base! with much of this! i just feel i need that disclaimer#grandpa max is god? i go to church now#i need a kon talk tag bc i swear i write more analysis stuff like this for him than anyone else
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I posted 1,584 times in 2021
438 posts created (28%)
1146 posts reblogged (72%)
For every post I created, I reblogged 2.6 posts.
I added 1,686 tags in 2021
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Longest Tag: 134 characters
#'she knows he’s having a hard time but she doesn’t ask she just reaches over and holds his hand' <- this is literally the sweetest wtf
My Top Posts in 2021
#5
Give Up
Couple - Spencer x pregnant!reader
Requested - can i request a little blurb where like reider (you know who this is bc of that lol) asks spencer if there’s someone else bc he’s still sleeping in the living room and she knows it isn’t true but her insecurities get the best of her? maybe like a part two to the fic you just wrote? i thought of that and i was like i need my heart strings pulled
Warnings - language, sexual innuendos and lots of them , insecurity, not proofread (lmk if i missed some)
Summary - Spencer’s been leaving bed abruptly since the start of your pregnancy, what was more interesting than staying home with you and your daughter?
Category - fluff and hurt/comfort i think?
Word Count - 4k
A/N - this one is kinda cute ngl but reader is hella dramatic lmao.
ident and italics = flashback
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Marriage was a two-way street, an agreement of compromise and a vow to never let go of the other. Your pregnancy was not easy in any way, filled with horrible discomfort and an annoying possibility of mood swings every time something ticked you off.
The two of you had to give up lots of things to make your little family work, especially since you were carrying your second child. You and Spencer agreed to make more time for each other and your kids— the both of you stepping down from the dangerous or time-consuming aspects of your jobs.
You always wondered if he secretly resented you for prompting him to give up his work as a field agent at the BAU. He was still there, working with Penelope at the office instead of flying from state to state every week, but you couldn’t help but question if a part of his heart blamed you for withholding him from doing something he loved.
He constantly reassured you but you were never certain despite the happy smile that was plastered on his face whenever he was around you or your daughter, Aurora. You thought the name was fitting since he always called her his ‘little princess’ but you preferred a shorter one, so the two of you settled on Aurora and Rory for short.
Spencer loved her and he loved you, at least you thought so.
Every day, in the early morning before dawn, he’d leave the bed and come back an hour or two later. It wasn’t uncommon for him to get up every once in a while because his brain wouldn’t stop churning, but, much to your chagrin, the act had become a daily occurrence.
You never knew where he was going and you didn’t want to ask either. Ignorance was always your downfall and it was clear that the flaw wouldn’t be changing anytime soon.
“Mommy,” your eyes fluttered open to see Rory standing at the edge of the bed near your face, “Wake up, Mommy.”
You nodded groggily, “I’m awake. What’s wrong?”
“Can I sleep with you please?”
You smiled and nodded, sitting up just enough to pick her up from the floor and roll her over to the center of the bed… a bed that was missing Spencer.
“Where’s Daddy?”
You pulled her close to your chest, being careful of the little bump on your stomach that continued to grow.
“I don’t know, love.”
“Daddy left earlier, I saw him leave.”
You furrowed your brows as your heart rate began to pick up from its resting state. “You saw him leave?”
She nodded her head rapidly, her tiny hands continuing to paw at your back. “Mhm, he told me not to tell you.”
The figure in your arms began to wiggle out of your grasp until she was flush with your face.
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822 notes • Posted 2021-09-30 03:19:00 GMT
#4
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843 notes • Posted 2021-07-31 22:45:33 GMT
#3
Spineless
Couple - Spencer x Fem!reader
Warnings - Language, sexual allusions, insecurity
Summary - Spencer’s had a crush on you for ages, but what will he do when you start to spend more and more time with his unit chief?
Category - hurt/comfort, fluff
Word Count - 4.6k
A/N - This is for @rigatonireid fic challenge with the prompt “I really hate the way you make me love you”. This was really fun to write lmao. Also, ik the timeline's kinda screwed up or some parts may be incoherent but um, ignore that! :)
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Spencer had seen you around a couple of times. He remembered walking by you so vividly, a memory that was replayed on an endless cycle in his mind. He could remember what your hair looked like, how it bounced as you strode towards him, the subtle floral scent that wafted around him as you walked past him.
It was one of those off days where he would wear his glasses to work instead of his contacts, probably since he hated touching his eyes with his fingers and he just couldn’t bear to do it that day. He walked in with them all fogged up, heart beating fast, face all red from his nerve-wracking crush, and hearts where his eyes should have been.
Derek eventually found out about his feelings for you and teased him about it relentlessly, always joking about how whipped Spencer was for you. Every time you came into the shared breakroom, he would immediately stop what he was doing as his eyes were drawn to you— almost as if you were the center of gravity. His face would turn red and he would start staring at you with large puppy dog eyes that eternally longed for you.
It wasn’t just about your looks, no, you were so much more than that. You were smart, obviously considering you were in the FBI, you were kind, you were radiant in every way possible. No matter how hard he tried, he could never find the courage to talk to you. It was heartbreaking for him to know that you would probably be swept off your feet by someone so much better than him. He even resorted to asking Derek for help, but he could never bring himself to even stand within 5 feet of you much less talk to you— and god forbid ask you out on a date.
He was sitting at a small table in the corner of the breakroom when he heard a door swing open. He ignored it, too enraptured in his book to pay attention to who it was. He had lost all hope of a future with you, so much so that he stopped actively looking for you.
“Excuse me?” His ears perked up as he heard your sweet, saccharine voice behind him. He immediately pushed his chair out, cringing at the screeching of the legs of the piece of furniture made. He stood up, almost knocking you off of your feet if it wasn’t for his quick reflexes. He immediately reached out to grab you as you simultaneously took hold of a nearby chair.
Both of your actions worked to negate the other, causing him to tumble forward onto you as you fell backward onto the table behind you. As the two of you finally stopped falling, he realized the extremely inappropriate position you both were in. Your leg had slid in between his as your knee applied a slight pressure onto his crotch. His poor attempt to steady you moments before backfired with one of his hands on your back, pulling the two of you close together with barely half an inch separating your bodies. His other hand, unfortunately, found its way into the area inside your arm, grabbing the side of your boob.
The two of you made eye contact, his face flushing instantly. “I- I’m so sorry. I-, I just.” His glasses conveniently fell off of his face and onto yours, bouncing off your nose and onto the floor. He gasped as he released his undying grasp on you and moved his body off of you, reaching for his bag to hide his excitement before attempting to find his glasses.
He could barely see as he squinted towards the ground to find any object that had any semblance to the lenses that sat atop his very boopable nose. You realized how lost he was without them so you reached down to grab them for him.
“No, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have come up behind you like that.” You handed him his glasses after you used the end of your blazer to rub off anything that may have gotten on them. You stood up straight and brushed your pants free of any wrinkles that may have formed, tucking strands of your hair behind your ear afterward. He stared at you, in complete shock from what had just occurred.
“Y- You’re from the BAU right?”
“U- um, y- yes.”
An airy giggle slipped out of your lips, you were thoroughly amused at his fluster. “I was going to ask if you could point me in the direction of Agent Aaron Hotchner’s office before, well you know, whatever that was.”
“R- right.” He put his glasses back on and it was like he was just given sight, literally and metaphorically. He was enchanted by your stunning beauty, the lights from behind you giving you a heavenly glow. He continued to stare into your beautiful eyes. They were something that he could get lost in for decades while he basked in your ethereal features for centuries. He began to smile lightly, unaware of your presence even though he was staring at you right in front of him.
He didn’t regain consciousness until you began to awkwardly shift in place. “Uh, e- excuse me?”
He shook his head, internally damning himself to hell. “I- I’m so sorry. Um, yes. Hotch’s office is up the landing through that door.” He pointed to the break room door that led to the bullpen.
“Okay, thank you so much!” You walked away, pushing the door open as you almost bumped into Derek.
“Oh, excuse me.” You gave him a polite smile as you walked away while he walked into the breakroom. Derek turned around to make sure the door was fully closed before he walked to Reid and sat on the edge of the table that he basically groped you on.
He sighed and gave him a disappointed look. “Kid. What. The. Hell. Was. That.”
He cleared his throat and attempted to straighten out his sweater vest and his perpetually crooked tie. “I um, I don’t know what you’re talking a- about.”
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846 notes • Posted 2021-09-08 04:26:03 GMT
#2
My Girl
Couple - Spencer x Fem!reader
Warnings - language, sexual innuendos and lots of them, mentions of sex and orgasm (like twice or three times or something)
Summary - Spencer cannot stop himself from buying things for you which has led to some… unpleasant feelings to arise inside of you.
Category - fluff
Word Count - 2.8k
A/N - why why why did i use that gif lmao, it's just so funny to me. also spencer and cats makes me happy.
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Your hand made contact with the cold, metal handle of your door, turning the knob and entering your apartment. Your ears perked up when you heard a familiar mumbling coming from the living room, along with the rustling of cardboard boxes.
You smiled when you walked in to see Spencer and your two kittens balancing themselves on his shoulder and the top of his head— his hair being flattened by the fur babies he insisted on adopting.
He was jotting something down onto a piece of paper on the coffee table, a mess of paper strewn around him. Beside him on the couch was a mountainous pile of clothing and neatly folded columns on the other.
Spencer was examining each article of clothing with his glasses on, bringing it close to his face and giving it a score based on the material.
“Spence?”
He turned around quickly, accidentally sending the cat on his head flying to the wooden floor. He gasped, leaning over to pick her up and pet her gently as an apology.
Spencer stood up and walked over to you. “Hi, love. Welcome home,” he gave you a kiss on your head and walked over to a cupboard in the kitchen— grabbing one of the treat bags and feeding one to both of the cats clinging onto him.
“What are you doing here?” You moved to look at the mess that had compiled in your small living room. Your hand brushed against a cardigan that was most definitely not Spencer’s.
He rushed over and swatted your hand away. “I haven’t looked at that one yet.”
“Spencer. What is going on,” you laugh, rubbing his shoulder and looking over to the paper on the table.
“I bought some stuff for you and I want to make sure it’s the best so I’m going over each one and testing its durability with information I found in a book at the library.”
Your eyes widened. “Some? Spencer, it looks like you bought the contents of a whole store.”
He smiled shyly, blushing. “I might have gotten carried away after Garcia showed me how to use my credit card online.”
You sat down next to him, brushing his hair to the side and kissing the side of his face tenderly. Your cats crawled onto your lap which caused Spencer to frown a bit, but it was quickly remedied when you placed your head onto his shoulder.
He finished the rest of his tests after a couple of minutes, waking you up from your light sleep by wrapping his arms around you. Spencer lifted your face as a gentle smile appeared onto your face, met with a small kiss from his lips.
“What am I going to do with all of these, Spence? I don’t really need new clothes, god forbid a whole new wardrobe.”
He chuckled, “I may have gotten a little too carried away.”
“Mhm, you think?”
He grabbed the cats off of your lap and placed them onto an empty area of the couch. “You have to try them on now.”
“All of them?”
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903 notes • Posted 2021-10-04 04:01:51 GMT
#1
Ass Guy, Boob Guy, You Guy
Couple - Spencer x Fem!Reader
Warnings - Language
Summary - Spencer and the rest of the BAU men, minus hotch, spend the night in a very interesting place. Spencer, drunk out of his mind, made his way home to you feeling as clingy as ever.
Category - fluffy af
Word Count - 1.9k
A/N - I’m pretty sure I’m just projecting what I want in a partner later on in life. Smh, I’m just setting myself up for disappointment tho. Enjoy! :)
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PART 2
Spencer sighed as he was fixing up his hair for a night out with Derek and Rossi, “Are you sure you’re alright with this?”
“Yes, love. Go, have fun, it’s been a while since you’ve hung out with them right?”
“Yes, but normally we don’t bond over practically naked women who have money stuffed in their bras in dingy clubs.”
You walked over to him with a large wad of dollar bills and stuffed it into his back pocket, resting your chin on his shoulders by standing on your tippy-toes. You kissed his chiseled face that rivaled that of a Classical Greek sculpture.
He looked back at you with his eyes wide as he tried to take the money out of his pocket and give it back to you, “Y/N! I don’t need this, what-”
“Derek may have called me while you were still at work and asked me to get some dollar bills.”
“H- he called you?”
You smirked at him, stuffing the money back into his pocket, “You think he’d invite you to a strip club without asking if I was okay with it first?”
He sighed and grabbed his coat from the closet, “I’ll probably leave early.”
“Look, don’t worry about me, okay? I trust you and I know you would never do anything,” you pushed both of his cheeks together, kissing his puffed lips, “Let loose a little and let some girls give you a dance, okay?”
“The only girl I want giving me a dance is you.” “Mhm, maybe another time,” you hugged him while pushing him out the door, “Have fun, babe. Love you. Bye!”
Defeated, Spencer clambered down the steps of your apartment building and was met with a gleaming Derek and smirking Rossi out front.
“Come on, Pretty Boy. Time for the night of our lives.” Spencer opened the car door and situated himself inside the vehicle while grumbling quietly to himself.
“Reid, we’re gonna have fun tonight. Don’t be so grumpy.”
“The two of you could have gone alone, I just wanted to spend my time off with my girlfriend.”
“Y/N gave you her blessing and even thought it was a good idea for you to come.”
“She wants me to spend time with you, not women in their underwear.”
“She said yes and that’s all that matters.”
Spencer had no interest in watching men around the club objectify women and grope them with a look of discomfort ever-present on their faces. He’d rather stay for the minimum amount of time and head back home to you. As the trio arrived at the club, multiple women practically threw themselves at Derek, as expected. A number of women also started to feel Rossi up because he had a ‘Sugar Daddy’ vibe. Of course, Spencer was left in the booth nursing his glass of whiskey alone until the two very busy men returned to the booth.
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1567 notes • Posted 2021-08-07 17:56:46 GMT
Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →
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hello again!! it’s the beginning of a new month, meaning a new fic rec post!! here are some fics that i read this month that are just... exquisite and deserve all the love and attention <3
there aren’t as many as last time unfortunately, since i was quite busy this past month, but i promise next month won’t fall short! ((fics that i’ve reread this month are indicated with a **))
Foolishly Laying Our Hearts On The Table [11k] by runaway_train @runaway-train-works
“You think Harry wants that?”
“Dunno. Maybe. Wanna make him happy.” Harry takes advantage of the red light he’s pulled up to turn and look properly at Louis’ face. He’s not even looking in Harry’s direction though, focused instead on something out of his side window, head drooped, mindlessly playing with the string of his hoodie between his fingers, lost in his own world somewhere. For some reason, it makes Harry’s spine straighten.
“Because he’s your best mate?” Harry questions carefully.
“He’s my boyfriend.”
He couldn’t have heard him right. “What?”
Louis releases a deep breath, still not turning around. Harry wonders who he thinks he’s talking to right now. “He’s so pretty. Want to kiss him all day long. And buy him a big house and give him presents and marry him.”
Or; The one where Harry is in love with his best friend Louis but doesn't think he stands a chance until some wisdom teeth and a rather unusual confession might just change his mind.
--> this is a new comfort fic for me tbh. i got rec’d this after louis tweeted about getting his wisdom teeth removed, and i’m so SO glad i decided to give it a read. it’s so precious and lovely and personally, i found it to be a quick read. it’s the kind of fic that makes me both warm and fuzzy inside but also highly upset that i’m single and will surely be alone forever
Just Let Me [14k] by HelloAmHere
The party was going well. So well, Niall had already sworn undying love to one multi-tiered chocolate cake, two friendly corgi-poodle mixes, Zayn’s hair, and the entire population of Los Angeles. So well, Zayn had only laughed and ruffled Niall’s hair and not even twitched towards a cigarette. So well, nearly everyone had spilled far past the boundaries of the night’s original plans, extracting bottles of vodka from the cabinets and losing a lot of clothes. Harry had proclaimed that he was finally going to throw a small and very grownup dinner party and of course here they were three hours later, fifty people half-naked in the pool. Soon to be full-naked, if Louis had to guess. Everybody in LA loved a heated pool. Everybody loved Harry.
--> ok LISTEN. as some of you know, i just recently got into reading a/b/o fics and this one is definitely at the top of my fave a/b/o fics out there. it’s an interesting take on the trope, almost a bit more realistic in my opinion, and to quote the author’s note, “’what if a/b/o but less biological determinism?’”. i believe i found this one through a masterpost of “touch-deprivation fics”, so if that’s your thing, give this one a chance!
my ugly mouth kept running [4k] by theankletattoo @hadestyles
Another seed, another try except they know what caused the first wilt. They will be careful, they will be kind and together they will nurture it to life.
sometimes second chances are more important than the first.
--> rori, the author, never fails to disappoint when it comes to all of her works. i’ve said it once and i’ll say it again, she’s so incredibly fucking talented it’s unreal. her imagery is so vivid and real it leaves simultaneously everything and nothing to the imagination. as usual, h and l’s dynamic in this is an addicting portion to this fic that has you anticipating how their dynamic will shift and grow up until the end. if you’ve yet to read any of rori’s work, i suggest you add that to your to-do list for the month, and get a head start to her collection with this one!
**As Wicked As Anything Could Be [21k] by whoknows @crazyupsetter
It starts when Louis decides that he wants to lose his cherry and announces that he thinks the best way to do that is by going to a gay club. Naturally, Harry can’t let him go alone, so he tags along and spends the night rating guys with Louis until someone finally catches Louis’s eye.
Harry shoves him out to dance with the guy, and he can already tell that it’s going to be a quick and dirty hook up, so he’s not surprised that Louis and the guy disappear into the bathroom ten minutes later.
It is a surprise when Louis comes out not even two minutes later, pale and clammy, grabs Harry by the hand and drags him right out the door.
Somehow Harry comes to the decision that it would be a good idea for him to be in the room with Louis while Louis gets laid.
It’s a stupid fucking decision.
--> i discovered this fic a while ago on a whim and i have zero regrets. this is absolutely on my top ten fave fics list (that has yet to exist but perhaps i’ll post it one day). whoknows is a well known author within the fandom, so i’m sure i don’t have to say much about their immense talent, but SERIOUSLY, their plot progression, even their use of dialogue is wonderful in every way. as a writer, i envy them lmao. this fic takes me on a rollercoaster every time i read it, it’s yet another comfort fic of mine and never fails to disappoint every time i pick it up again. please, do yourselves a favor this april and read this.
Keeping The Flame Alive [19k] by whoknows @crazyupsetter
Recording with One Direction never felt like this. There’s a couple reasons for that, Harry thinks. One is that they did most of their recording on the road, rushed and in busses and hotel rooms, never in one place long enough to really get an argument going. The other, larger and more important one, is that back then he had the sweetest, meanest little omega around to distract him from all of that frustration.
The first time around, when he’d been recording his debut solo album, it hit him pretty hard. He likes to think he’s better adjusted to it now, but frustration is warring under his skin nonetheless. He doesn’t want to be told what to do most of the time, and he especially doesn’t want to be told what to do when it comes to his music.
What he does want right now is that sweet, mean little omega right in front of him with his mouth on Harry’s cock. Unfortunately, the best he’s got is his own hand and a shared toilet. So. That’s really not going to work.
--> yes, for the first time in dehydratedpoolfics history of fic recs even tho i’ve only been doing this for a month i am rec’ing the same author twice, but seriously, how could i not??? this fic took me on a literal journey like... wtf. i have no words. seriously, i have none, i’m just that blown away, go read it for yourself .
**a trail of honey through it all [27k] by bruisedhoney @yvesaintlourent
The boy in front of him, well really, the man in front of him, was like something out of a confusing wet dream. Built, tall, tan and muscular, his skin glistened with sweat after a long day of working outdoors with his hands. He was wearing a cut up old American football shirt, the bottom hem was torn and the sleeves were cut off to the point where the t-shirt was really just a loose tank top. The shorts he had on had clearly been full length jeans at one point, and were now just crudely cut off above the knee. His white socks were pulled up too high on his calves, and the brown work boots he had on were old as fuck, the leather peeling along the edges of the soles. Curly brown hair stuck out from the edges of his backwards snapback, and there was a smudge of grease wiped along his brow bone. The smattering of hair along his jaw proved that he hadn’t shaved in a week or two, the hair growing in thicker across his upper lip and around his chin. His sinfully bowed mouth was pink and plump, and Louis was suddenly hyper-focused on the way that he chewed at the toothpick stuck between his lips. He looked like he needed a shower. Louis wanted to lick him.
Or, the TPH fic we’ve all been waiting for.
--> okay look. i may or may not have a slight obsession with this fic. i reread it constantly, mostly for the iconic line, “are we fuckin’ or fightin’?”, because how can i not scream over that?? ((also patiently waiting for the sequel)) this is a literary masterpiece, one that defines an entire generation of this fandom i stg. but in all seriousness, hayley, the author, does such a wonderful job of giving the reader a vivid look into “nowhere, georgia”, and as a southern gal myself, i absolutely adore the itty bitty pieces of southern culture embedded into this, the tiny quirks that make this fic authentic. i could probably go on forever on why this fic is so iconic, but perhaps you should read it for yourself instead *wink* *wink*
SO. that’s all for this month!! if you read any of these, first of all, be sure to read the tags and author’s note (if any) before starting, AND please don’t forget to leave a quick kudos or comment, it means more than you may ever know <3
#fic recs#fic rec#yourlarrysource#hlcreators#hljournal#harry styles#louis tomlinson#larry stylinson#fanfiction#writing#march 2021 fic recs
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Dancing with Our Hands Tied Part 6// Tom Holland x Reader
Summary: Tom Holland is your best friend and your roommate, but you both have undisclosed feelings for each other.
Word count: 4K 💛
A/N: Okay, I’M SO SORRY FOR THE LONG WAIT! I'm so glad you’ve guys stuck around though..I really appreciate it! honestly, the next part might be the last one :)
Warnings: smut, cussing, there is a part that depicts an anxiety attack, AND I’M NOT GLORIFYING AN ANXIETY ATTACK. y’all get so butthurt on here (like fake fucking homecomings like wtf), its just a fucking story. anyway, this shit ain’t real..if you don’t want to read what people want to put out then maybe fan fictions aren’t for ya.. y’all are super sensitive on here lmao k thanks for coming to my ted talk bye and I kind of proofread but not really
Prologue Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5
-
Right from the moment those elevator doors opened, Y/N froze. It’s been almost 72 hours since their flat was broken into but having to go outside was a different story. She didn’t trust the world anymore, she never did but now she really didn’t.
It was easier said than done, she wanted to go out but she didn’t recognize the amount of people that would surround them. Instead of walking out of the elevator, she turns to the two boys behind her. The elevator doors close but the elevator itself doesn’t move, since no buttons have been pushed.
“I can’t.” She shakily lets out, her hands immediately making their way towards her neck. It truly wasn’t hot in the elevator but Y/N’s forehead had broke out in light sweat. Her throat was closing up on her again. Harrison just watched in confusion, he had never seen one of her anxiety attacks and was looking at Tom to help her but that was the thing. The brunette didn’t know what to do.
Tom really recognized that it is her anxiety creeping up on her again but as far as how to handle it was foreign to him, so he follows his instincts and his hands go to her waist “Listen, just breathe.” He breathes in and out slowly, which Y/N begins to mimic. Harrison stands by Tom who just watches them slowly interact.
The blonde isn’t sure about what to do but brings up a solution, “Listen, we can go through the back.. we don’t have to walk through those paps.” Tom unzips Y/N’s sweater, his hands moving from her sweater and back to tucking her hair behind her ear. He wasn’t sure if this was helping but he was going to do anything to try to calm her down.
Y/N isn’t really tuned into Harrison though, she’s concentrated on her breathing. Air coming in through her nose and out through her mouth in synchronicity with Tom. His hands begin to run down her shoulders and to her arms, “Keep breathing, okay?”
She nods her head while she continues to motion the breathing, her airways feeling like they have opened up again. But she continued to calmly breathe, not wanting to feel anything close up again, her eyes closed so tight and she switches from breathing from her nose and out her mouth.
“We can go back upstairs.” Tom suggests as Haz reaches goes to hit a button to go back to the 2nd floor but Y/N shakes her head no.
She nods as sweat from her forehead becomes to dry, “No..” she takes another deep breath, “I want to go out, I can’t be in there.” Her breathing is a bit more paced, and becoming a little more calm.
“I just want to get some fresh air.” Her hand lands on Tom’s shoulder who brings his lips in a tight line, not really sure if it’s the best idea. He shrugs his shoulders, “Look, I’ll exit the front so that they don’t bombard you. You and Harrison can go through the back”
Y/N’s breathing is more controlled at this point but she’s still nervous, “Are you sure?” And that’s when Tom knew that he wanted to be with her, here she was having an anxiety attack and she wanted to know if he was gonna be okay going out to those paparazzi alonee.
Tom grabs her hand and puts it in Harrison’s hand, “I’ll be fine, stay close to Haz and I’ll meet you guys at the restaurant.” He brings her knuckles to his lips, “I promise you’ll be okay.”
She almost wanted to melt her hand into his cheek but the touch was short because almost immediately he turned around to the elevator doors and presses the button that causes it to open. He exits the elevator and the flashes from the paparazzi begin to cloud his vision, and he glances once more before he exits the building to make sure y/n and haz exit safely.
The moment he exited the apartment, a bunch of questions came flying his way but he just ignored them all. Tom was usually one to smile and talk to paparazzi but not today, not when his girl was vulnerable and he wanted to protect her. Instead of the walk to his car being only about 5 minutes, it took like 15 minutes because he wanted to buy time for his Haz to get to the restaurant and also because of the flashes from the cameras slowing him down.
Even though it was only about 10 paparazzi clouding Tom, the flashes and constant questioning made it difficult to walk on an empty curb for him. He walked with his hands in his pockets while trying to make it to his car that was down the street, trying to ignore the constant questioning.
Tom, when does filming resume? Is y/n okay? Are you both dating?
He kept his head down until he finally reached his car, giving a quick peace sign as he got in. A big sigh of relief came when he saw the text from Haz saying that him and Y/N arrived at the Cheesecake Factory. Before Tom drove off he told Haz to ask for a table that was secluded from everyone, he didn’t want to risk Y/N having an anxiety attack in front of everyone.
-
Tom entered the restaurant, his hands pushing back his curls from his eyes. He made his way to the front desk, making his way to the hostess who was writing down a couple of things. He clears his throat, “Hello, I have two friends-”
“Oh yes, of course. They’re waiting over here.” She comes around from the counter and gestures hand movements to him, as they walk together towards his table. The staff really hooked it up with a secluded table, it was at the corner of the restaurant and it also helped that the lunch rush had died down before Haz and Y/N got there.
As he got closer to the table, he could hear her giggle. She was probably laughing over a dumb joke that Haz was telling her, her anxiety gone by the time she arrived. Once she seen Tom coming in sight, it was like her night and shining armor was coming. She was so grateful for what he did because she knew she wouldn’t have been able to handle the paparazzi.
Tom pulled out his seat as she lightly touched his bicep, “Hey, thank you for all of that.” He smiles as he notices your gentle touch, “Yeah, yeah. I couldn’t let you walk through that mess.” He flips his curls out of his sight and smiles at his best friend, “Thanks mate, I really appreciate that.”
The blonde nods, “No worries, I just can’t wait til we’re back in London. The paps aren’t too bad out there. And speaking of London-”
Tom’s foot hits Harrison’s shin as his eyes widen, “We’ll talk about that when we get home, I just want to hang out right now.” Y/N a bit oblivious to the two guys at the table as she looked through the menu.
“I don’t know if I should get the orange chicken or chicken picatta..” she exclaims as she purses her lips in thought. Tom chuckled as his eyes moved from the menu to her face, fuck she was so adorable. The way she was pursuing her lips really made him fall in love with her more.
“Aye, mate.. got a little drool you might wanna clean up.” Haz says as he knocks Tom out of his trance. “Shut up, you div.” The two boys squint their eyes in
-
-
The the trio arrives back to the flat just around 8 pm, and the car ride back wasn’t as hectic as earlier. The paparazzi that hounded the outside of the flat were gone as well.. the photographers and videographers grabbing whatever they needed earlier that day.
Tom and Harrison hung out in his room while Y/N lay on the couch, relaxing while the guys chat in the room. The brunette haired man leaves his door open a bit, just a crack open so that he could hear his roommate. “I don’t know how to ask her to come back home, mate.”
Haz gets under Tom’s covers, snuggling his head into the pillow “All you literally have to do is ask..like this ‘Y/N, move back to London with me.’” The blonde closes his eyes, exhausted from jet lag.
Tom goes to his emptied cabinets that had been taken by the intruders, staring at the once filled shelves of his memorabilia that he owned. “It’s like, I don’t even care about what they took. I just care about her and I regret telling her to leave, I just want her to know that I really do care about her.”
“I care about you too.”
The sound of Y/N’s voice causes Tom’s head to snap quickly at his door, he swallows so intensely that his jaw line becomes more defined. He looks back at his friend who is asleep, he was probably so tired from these past two days that his body instantly brought him to his sleep.
“Wow, Harrison is such a great listener.” She says sarcastically as she enters Tom’s room slowly, but the brunette walks towards her with open arms, “Are you sure you want to be in here? I don’t want to trigger anything.”
She holds his hands, her strength and energy slowly coming back, “I’m not going to let what happened to me, let it put me down.. being in here makes me feel almost empowered in a way.” Y/N looks down at her feet that are close to his, she swallows in her pride although she’s still recovering.
Then they just stand there in silence, not awkward silence but just peaceful almost. Harrison’s snoring becoming louder as the two just stared at each other, both ignoring the loud ronks.
“You know,” she says as she clears her throat, “I only thought about you the whole time.” Tom’s eyes move from her lips to her eyes, he’s becoming more nervous because of how fragile she is but he wants to hear what she has to say.
“We don’t have to talk about it.” He says as she begins to take a seat on his carpet floor, Tom’s hands slowly guiding her down as he follows after her. Their backs against his bedpost, and their heads resting against it too.
He looks at her while she looks straight ahead, tears flooding her as eyes as she begins to relive that night she came home. Her bruised hand runs through her hair, “I, uh-” the burning sensation in her throat impairing her speaking.
Tom knowing that this must be hard to talk about brings his arm around her shoulder and pulls her in, “Take your time.” A tear begins to stroll down her cheek as she turns her head to look at him, “That’s the thing, Tom… I didn’t know how much time I had left and all I could think was that I wanted you..” more tears begin to fall down her cheeks as Tom brings his other arm around her.
Y/N now being caressed by Tom takes his scent in once again, “All I could do was breathe in the scent from your bed, it made me feel like you were coming..” there is a pause, and this when he realizes that he might end up crying too.
“But I knew you weren’t..” Her face is buried in his chest while her arms wrap around his torso.
Tom leaves a kiss on the top of her head, holding her just like they both wanted him to. “I’m here now, Y/N.. and I’m not leaving you..I promise.”
She brings her head up to look into his eyes, “I do want to move out, Tom.”
That was like a sting to his heart but it soon went away with her next response, “but with you.. i know you think what happened was your fault Tom but I never wanted to be with you more than I do now.” The smile forming on her face causing him to have a hopeful smile. She adds one more thing to her comment, “maybe a one bedroom flat this time?” She asks as she bites the bottom of her lip.
He decided that if anytime was a good moment to ask her to move to Kingston with him, it was now.
Before she can continue to speak he says, “I’m so glad to hear you say that Y/N because-”
“I’m sorry to interrupt but are you guys down to go get starbucks with me?”
Out of nowhere Harrison decided to wake up during the conversation, he rubs his swollen eyes with his hands. Y/N laughs as Tom shakes his head in somewhat disappointment but also lets out a small chuckle.
“Sure, Haz. We’ll go with you.” Y/N says as she gets up from the floor with Tom’s help.
Luckily the starbucks was down the street, Harrison just had really bad timing.
-
Y/N enters the flat with her pink drink that Haz bought for her with the boys quickly following behind her. She makes her way towards the hallway but looks back at the boys before continuing her way to the room, “I’m gonna get ready for bed but Tom?”
He takes a sip of his coffee while he makes eye contact with his roommate, “Yeah?” She smiles with her eyes, “Can you come to my room when you get a chance?”
He nods in response as she makes her way back to her room, Tom is pulled back by Haz’s hand.
“Have you talked to her about moving to Kingston yet?” The blonde takes a sip from his green tea frap, “We have to fly back within the next two days mate, you gotta tell her.”
The brunette makes his way towards the counter, “I know, I know. I’m gonna do that now.” He sets his coffee down on the counter as he pulls out a packet mints from his pocket.
Haz takes a seat on the counter as he continues to sip on his frap, “You need a mint to ask her to move to Kingston with you?”
Tom makes a face at his friend, “Dude...coffee breath.” He throws the mint into his mouth before he blows out air from his mouth, “Alright, wish me luck.” He rubs his hands together as he leaves Haz, a low goodluck as he makes his way towards her room.
The short few steps he’s making towards his room feeling like forever until he’s finally at her door, he taps her door twice, “Y/N?”
He pushes her door to find her sitting on her bed with her phone in hand, smiling as soon as she sees him. “Hey, come in.” She taps the side of her bed that was empty, the space she had made for him.
Y/N was in a silk robe that Zendaya had given her from her clothing line, why she decided to use it now? Only Y/N knew that answer and she wanted to give something to Tom.
“Close the door behind you.” She says as he makes a quick u-turn to close the door. He turns back around, his hands shoots to his pockets as he walks towards his head.
“What’s up, darling?” He says as he stands at the side of her bed, she laughs at his nervousness. She’s not really sure why he’s nervous when she’s the one whose palms can’t stop sweating.
She tucks a hair behind her ear, “Sit next to me.” She taps again at her bed, he’d admit she looked so fucking stunning. The way she’d let her hair loose, and no makeup really made him feel some type of way. He takes a seat on the bed, kicking off his shoes before bringing his feet onto the bed.
She gets on her knees and makes her way towards him, her hands resting on his shoulders, “Look, I love you so much and…” she takes a deep breath as she looks into his eyes, “I want to give you all of me because I realized that life is too short and this just feels so right.”
Y/N begins to lean to kiss Tom, the tips of their noses touching but before she can plant a kiss he adds, “Are you sure?” His hands move from his sides to her hips.
She lets out a shaker breath as she looks into his eyes, “I’ve never been more sure of anything, Tom.” And with that, he didn’t even think twice about bringing his lips to hers. To both of them this felt so right, like how it was always meant to be.
Tom straightens out his legs as Y/N throws her legs over him, her arms still wrapped around his neck. Her core hovering over Tom’s sweats, her hands begin to leave his shoulders and to her abdomen where the robe is tied. She becomes a bit tense, it was a mixture of being touched by Tom but the last time she was touched were by people that broke in.
She begins to become a bit hesitant, and Tom notices, “I’m not gonna hurt you love, you can trust me..” and that was enough for her to bring her lips back to his, it just felt so right.
His hands move from her hips to her hands, “If you want me to stop, tell me.” His nose still touching hers, and she doesn’t even respond but just nods as her lips find her way back to his. Their hands untying her robe in synchronicity to reveal that she was wearing nothing under. His hands moving from hips to her breast, her hands on his shoulders again as their kisses intensify.
His hands gripping right beneath her boobs, and that’s when he starts to push her back. Making his way slowly on top of her, their heads towards the end of the bed. Her legs wrapping around his waist as soon as his weight is on top of her. Her hands tugging at the ends of his shirt as she begins to pull it up, their lips still attached as he pulls the shirt off with his left hand.
Her core desperately trying to rub against his, and he’s grinding against her. Her feet moving higher, almost at the band of sweats trying to tug them down and she is somewhat successful. Tom’s lower body becoming exposed as she continues to move down the sweats, his kisses moving down her neck as his hands start to tug on his sweats.
Tom brings himself up just enough to pull down his sweats, at least to his ankles. He comes back down to her, his lips making their way to her chest. While he’s leaving marks, her feet continue to rub of his sweats from his ankles in which she is successful. As he continues to suck on her chest, his right hand makes its way down to her core and rubs her slightly, “Already wet for me darling?”
She covers her face shyly, “I know.” He brings his hand to move her her hands from her face, “don’t be embarrassed, it’s fucking sexy.” He attaches his lips to hers again, he wants nothing but to make her feel good but a pit of nerves stops him again.
Y/N can tell the mood change in Tom a bit, “What is it?” He kisses her forehead, “I just- if it hurts, please tell me to stop..I will.”
She nods her head and gives Tom an Eskimo kiss, “You’re cute when you care.” His hand rests on her cheek, “you’re everything, love.” And no more words are exchanged, except nothing but intimacy between two people that were in love.
-
-
The next morning, Y/N woke up early to brew some coffee. She wasn’t going to lie she was a bit sore from what had happened between her and Tom but it really was something she didn’t regret. As she waited for the coffee to pour out into the pot, she reached for the cabinet by the fridge and pulled out some advil, she wasn’t sure if it would help but she decided to take some anyway.
“You have a headache?”
She turns around to find Harrison pulling a seat out on the counter, “Uh, yeah I do. I’m not sure why.” She opens the container and then puts it back in the cabinet, “Why are you up so early anyway, Harrison?”
He clears his throat while he sets down his phone on the counter, “Just finished talking to Tom’s PR team..they want to fly out a fan for the brothers trust so that this ‘scandal’ could blow over.” Y/N nods as she pulls out two mugs from the cabinets for both of them, “I see, I mean that’s smart I guess.”
She turns her back to get the fresh brew of coffee, “So I’m assuming the conversation you both had went well last night?” Haz asks as she turns back around with the coffee pot, a smirk across his face as he holds out his mug.
Y/N begins to pour the brew into his mug, “I mean, what makes you say that?” She says obnoxiously but playfully at the same time. He blows lightly into the mug and takes a sniff at the coffee while she pulls creamer out of the fridge, “I’m just guessing, he didn’t end up in his bed last night so I’m only assuming that you both-”
“Harrison please..” she shakes both hands, not wanting to hear what he was gonna say next. They both chuckle as they prepare their coffees, and of course being the blonde that he is..he probably brings up too much, “So when are you both moving into the new place?”
Her eyes squint a bit, not remembering mentioning to him about moving into a new place with Tom, “Mmm, I-”
Haz takes a sip and sets down his cup excitedly, “You’re gonna love Kingston, the weather is beautiful except for the casual rainstorms and-”
“Kingston? What are you talking about?” Y/N asks as she tucks a hair behind her ear.
Harrison scratches his head in confusion, “Wait, isn’t that what you both talked about last night? Tom said he was gonna ask you to move to Kingston.”
Her eyes widen in a shock, “I mean, we talked about moving in but he didn’t ask me to move out there.”
The blonde stands from the seat and shakes his head, “Fuck, just forget what I said. Y/N, don’t-”
“Goodmorning..” Tom remarks as he makes his way into the kitchen, the blonde and his girl just watch him with his hand messing with his messy bed hair. “What’s up?” He puts his arm around her and pulls her in closer, leaving a kiss on the side of her head.
Tom notices the slight tension in the kitchen, “What’s up with you both?”
She bites her bottom lip, and looks back into the brunette’s eyes, “When were you going to tell me about me moving to Kingston with you?”
-A/N: Soooo, what’s gonna happen next? Sorry if this wasn’t were y’all expecting…OKAY Y’ALL! PLEASE SOUND OFF IN MY ASKS! SORRY FOR THE LONG WAIT, I PROMISE I’M TRYING TO BE MORE CONSISTENT. I’ll take any advice, theories, suggestions..please feedback is key! also love y’all, hope you’re enjoying this fic so far. Love ya -Amy 💛
#tom holland x reader imagines#tom holland#Tom Holland Fan Fiction#tom holland angst#tom holland fan fic#tom holland x reader#tom holland x readerr#tom holland x reader imagine#tom holland x y/n#tom holland x y/n imagine#tom holland x y/n imagines#tom#holland#dancing with our hands tied#tom holland smut#y/n x tom#y/n x tom holland
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BAEEEEK I'M GONNA D WORD I sent you two messages yesterday (including my Hwa fan call experience no. 2) or so I thought because the airport wi-fi sucked ass and I think it didn't send? 😢😢😢😢 I'm so sad. I'll send them again when I have time, but yes I'm alive, the trip was so fun, the wedding as well and one guy clearly wanted something from me, but a. Wrong address b. Not my type anyway. He asked if the guy on my phone was my bf (I have Hyunjin and Seonghwa as my wallpaper and lockscreen) but I'm pretty sure he meant Hwa, so I answered "yes" with my whole chest, lmaoooo. 😊 he might as well be with all the boyfriend Seonghwa photos he's been gracing us with recently (so glad I'm normal, not delulu 😏)
Have you seen HEADBAND TENNIS PLAYER HWA?! So cute, same with Joong!
Also.... model Seonghwa (I know I placed him at the bottom of my ranking, but I still love the idea of him ok) KQ send him to Paris with Kai and Hyunlix, plssss wtf are you doing 😭
Over 18k for grandpa Hwa, my god lmaoooo. Me at the beach honestly, I fell on the rocks too, ouch.
Can you believe I met a Hyunjin stan on the plane and then an Army (a Taehyung and Yoongi stan) at the wedding 🤨
Anyways that's all I have at this point, I'm so tired I need to 😴 for 10 years, except I can't because work (derogatory)
How are you doing? How's writing 🤔? I know you're in Yunho era which is great, but as a greedy Shinestar I can't help but wonder about your future Hwa fic... you know what I'm waiting for 🤗 - DV 💖
hi hello!!
BAEEEEK I'M GONNA D WORD I sent you two messages yesterday (including my Hwa fan call experience no. 2) or so I thought because the airport wi-fi sucked ass and I think it didn't send? 😢😢😢😢 I'm so sad. I'll send them again when I have time, but yes I'm alive, the trip was so fun, the wedding as well and one guy clearly wanted something from me, but a. Wrong address b. Not my type anyway. He asked if the guy on my phone was my bf (I have Hyunjin and Seonghwa as my wallpaper and lockscreen) but I'm pretty sure he meant Hwa, so I answered "yes" with my whole chest, lmaoooo. 😊 he might as well be with all the boyfriend Seonghwa photos he's been gracing us with recently (so glad I'm normal, not delulu 😏)
NAURRRRRR WHAT IS GOING ON WITH TUMBLR 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 i think sometimes when u send it and swipe out of the app super quick it doesn't send (??) BUT HOW WAS MALTAA,,, FHAHGFSBBFSB AS U SHOULD SAY IT LOUD AND PROUD !!!!!! stop hat's so fun bc i would actually say the same <3 one delulu moment <3 imagine if the dude finds out who hwa is and goes around telling ppl that "I KNOW HIS GIRLFRIEND" 😭😭😭
Have you seen HEADBAND TENNIS PLAYER HWA?! So cute, same with Joong!
SUPERIOR PHOTOSHOOT AND THAT BLUSH????? THE COLOURS SIR I AM GONNA EAT YOU
Also.... model Seonghwa (I know I placed him at the bottom of my ranking, but I still love the idea of him ok) KQ send him to Paris with Kai and Hyunlix, plssss wtf are you doing 😭
.....and now if ysl or dior signs him, im officially a psychic <3 OH?????? I THOUGHT U DIDNT LIKE HIM HUH CAUGHT U RED HANDED IN 4K,,,, NO LITERALLY SEND HIM TO PARIS W KAI AND HYUNLIX ID ACTUALLY DIE kai absolutely killed me tho enjoy his whoreass laughing
Over 18k for grandpa Hwa, my god lmaoooo. Me at the beach honestly, I fell on the rocks too, ouch.
LMFAOOOOO POOR GUY VBFHDGFJDHGF HE'S HALFWAY 50 AND PRACTICING omg NOOOO 😭😭😭😭😭😭 ARE U OKAY JDFBKJ
Can you believe I met a Hyunjin stan on the plane and then an Army (a Taehyung and Yoongi stan) at the wedding 🤨
sorry a yoongi, hyunjin stan and who? this guy? ur never escaping the thvism hfajwefhwhflw following u to WEDDINGS
Anyways that's all I have at this point, I'm so tired I need to 😴 for 10 years, except I can't because work (derogatory)
sleep well 😭😭😭😭😭😭 hope u had lots of fun!!!!
How are you doing? How's writing 🤔? I know you're in Yunho era which is great, but as a greedy Shinestar I can't help but wonder about your future Hwa fic... you know what I'm waiting for 🤗 - DV 💖
i am currently going a little mental over this yunho & and i watched the proposal again last night and my mind just jingled and i have been writing the dating au since bbfdb, GREEDY SHINESTAR GIRLIE I WAS LIKE "what if i write this yunho fic as seonghwa so that i write more and at the end switch hwa's name to yunho's" THE GREED IN ME HAS NOT DECREASED DFBGH... i know exactly what u are waiting for and i am very pleased to tell u that, that is the next fic <3 but the ending 😶😶
also going a little crazy over this key taeyeon edit hOW ARE YOU DOING
AND
“you wanna go for a walk?”
seonghwa and babies when
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Until Next Time—02 [m]
[10:36 PM] Jimin: babe, i have an emergency
[10:37 PM] You: what is it??
[10:37 PM] Jimin: um, i’m really hard right now. help me out
[10:39 PM] Jimin: [image0541.png]
[10:39 PM] Jimin: please? :)
Synopsis: You’re finally seeing Jimin tomorrow after months of amorous skype sex, but the night before he asks for a small favor.
Pairing: Jimin x Reader // gaming au/long distance relationship
Genre: Smut, Humor
Word Count: 4k
Includes: skype sex, dirty talk
Parts: 01 || 02 || 03
A/N: woooow, the next part finally re-uploaded!! the sports collab is taking longer than i thought to finish and push out.... oh my, LOL
[11:29 PM] Jimin: is requesting a video call…
[11:30 PM] You: missed a video call from Jimin.
Three months have passed since the accidental encounter with Park Jimin, your cyber fuck buddy. You would have never guessed that a random stranger from a dumb online game would grow the slightest ounce of significance in your life; then again, perhaps you just got lucky.
[11:30 PM] Jimin: wtf are you doing, don’t you want to see my face?
[11:32 PM] You: We have thirty minutes till midnight and i want to sleep
[11:32 PM] Jimin: well i just want to see you
[11:33 PM] You: ur literally seeing me tomorrow. leave me alone omfg
It isn’t a lie that you are going to hop on a short plane ride to see him in person after viewing his face through a small screen for months. Honestly, the few months of phone sex and dirty texts lost their excitement and thrill. So, like every time before, Jimin pressed on the fact that you should see him.
And after giving the same response of “no” for a while, you finally comply and the long awaited day is less than 24 hours away.
So why the fuck is he requesting to video call as if that day is never arriving?
[11:37 PM] Jimin: please, i’m kind of horny rn :)
[11:40 PM] You: Let me sleep!! I’ll be tired tomorrow if i don’t lmao
[11:41 PM] Jimin: that’s okay we can spend it in my bed
[11:41 PM] Jimin: ;)
[11:43 PM] You: Why are we friends again
[11:44 PM] Jimin: we aren’t friends :) we’re more than that
Well, he isn’t wrong. You would define your relationship with Park Jimin as friends with benefits — through the darn internet — but he would strongly argue otherwise by tossing around the term “fuck buddies,” online of course.
But even though he isn’t wrong, his craving for you as a whole is through the roof. You would either wake up with a horny text from Jimin; if not, a few desperate missed calls. The entire cycle of skype sex after a few rounds of playing a match continues with ease — the whole “relationship” appears to flow smoothly to your surprise. Finally, after three extensive months of pleasuring yourself to the thought of him or the mere sound of his voice, you can touch him in person, feel him in real life — fuck him especially.
[11:46 PM] Jimin: is requesting a video call…
[11:48 PM] You: missed a video call from Jimin.
You frown at your screen, waiting for his following messages to flood in from why you are declining his calls, and they come instantaneously.
[11:49 PM] Jimin: baby :(
[11:49 PM] Jimin: i’m needy rn. horny rn. pleaseeee
You watch the plethora of his pleads soar in one after another, each message filling with more desire after the previous. Aware that his excuse of a scheme to get you to give into him will not come to an end, you take the device in hand and switch on the silence option. Though, before you get the chance to place it back onto your nightstand, the most enticing message of the night arrives:
[11:50 PM] Jimin: [image0541.png]
You take a second to yourself to wonder if it is the right choice to brush the message to the side, ignoring it until the sun rises, but there is a part of you that wants to give into what wonder lies within the picture message.
Jimin always does that when you deny him — refuse to satisfy him. He sends a needy picture of himself, hand shoved down his pants or a perfect image of his whole, hard length that aches for you. And every single time, you give in.
You are trying to fight the strong urge to swipe your screen to unlock, the treasure of an image unraveling before your eyes, but like always, you give in.
Oh, how that is a mistake.
Because what awaits your screen complete exceeds your first thought of the message. Rather than it being a selfie of Jimin pouting or a blurry capture of his semi-hard length resting in the gaps of his fingertips, it is something far more rousing. Jimin has his hand wrapped around his hard member, pants and boxers hugging his thighs as he stands comfortably in the confinements of his restroom. He has freshly came, creamy white dripping from his slit and down his length, coating his fingers in his own succulence.
The tip of his dick is still tinging with scarlet hues, the amount of effort it took for him to hold off limpid; honestly, it is a huge turn on. You wonder what he put himself through to distract his being from giving into his carnality, result being satisfying to both you and him anyway. God, the sight of his aching dick alone provides you with enough elements to lucidly imagine his guttural groans, whispers of your name as he fucks his own hand to the enlivening thought of you.
Ready to reply with a simple message, he interrupts your typing phase with another picture.
[11:54 PM] Jimin: [image0542.png]
[11:54 PM] Jimin: talk to me :(
It’s another picture of his sex, grasp still around his now flaccid length.
[11:58 PM] Jimin: baby pleaseee
Fine, what’s the worst that can happen anyway? It will only be a few minutes of giving him what he wants then you can sleep soundly for the next day. You prop your laptop on your pillow and start up skype, immediately searching for his contact name.
[11:59 PM] You: are requesting to video call…
Within a matter of seconds, he answers.
The moment his eyes fall onto your tired self, prone physique adorning an oversized tee with your messy hair, he lets out a bright smile as if on cue. “Beautiful,” he comments in an excited voice, “you’re so beautiful. I’m so happy I can finally see this in person tomorrow.”
“Yeah?” you say. “If you fall asleep now then tomorrow will come quicker.”
You watch him purse his lips into a pout. “Jeez, this won’t even take long. You can fall asleep on the call if you’d like—I just wanted to see you for a little while.”
“I won’t be sleeping if you’re going to be talking,” you point out, drained.
Jimin chuckles, implying something else. “Right,” he says nervously, “so, um…”
“What is it?” You raise a brow, rubbing your tired eyes.
“Fuck,” he says with a huff, “you’re so hot. I really can’t believe I’m seeing you tomorrow. I can see your face, touch your body, taste you, and—”
“—oh my god,” you interrupt, “Jimin are you still horny?”
“I can’t help it, I’m just excited to see you,” he whines.
You shrug off his comment and follow with another question, “Where are you right now? Why is it so dark? I can barely see you.”
“In my room now,” he responds instantly, “wishing you were here.”
“Gosh, you’re so horny,” you roll your eyes.
Jimin laughs, his smile bright. He leans in, coming closer to the webcam — the screen — to get a better view of you. “I can’t help it.”
“I can’t wait to see you tomorrow,” you muse with a smirk.
Jimin hums, still unable to think straight. “Right, but for now, um, tonight… Can I watch you?”
Your eyes flare wide at his request, a blatant foreign statement hopping off the tip of his tongue. “Why so eager?”
“Because—” Jimin groans and throws himself back against the mattress, slightly kicking the blanket like a petulant child— “Fuck, my dick is already getting hard again just thinking about it.”
You take a moment to allow yourself to think: when is the last time you have seen Jimin so desperate? He tends to be patient while committing skype sex with you, sole reason to tease you to the edge, lightly boss you around until you are begging — but it appears the roles have switched tonight. Your disbelief towards Jimin’s helpless desires is amusing, but an absolute war for Jimin.
You crack a sly grin, evocative scenarios running through your mind. Jimin is quite similar to a pawn now, ready to take orders — only to have his cravings met. “What are you thinking about?”
Jimin raises himself quickly, eyes staring straight at the webcam. “I’ll tell you if you finger yourself for me.”
“I will if you guess what color my panties are,” you tell him, holding back your impatient longing.
You watch the bright screen and the way his eyebrows raise to your statement, lips pressing into a tight line while his pants become more compact due to his solidifying member. “Um,” he licks the outline of his lips, gaze directed upwards as if he is soaring through his thought clouds. Though, all he can imagine is a wet spot on your underwear, which he would then gladly pull down only to press his tongue at your drenching core. “R-red?” he croaks, embarrassed at the way his voice cracks.
You shake your head, entertained. “Nope, try again.”
He bites his lip, crossed. “My favorite color, pink?”
“Wrong,” you inform him with a singsong voice. Jimin groans, patience falling apart and he hangs his head low. You position yourself in front of the camera, knees digging into the soft of your mattress as you play with the hem of your large shirt. You pull it up slowly, fabric inching higher and higher on your thighs before you raise it to your stomach. “I’m not wearing any, Jimin.”
Jimin quickly lifts his head, hands soaring to grab onto the display of his laptop while his yearning eyes are filling with hope. The moment your pussy comes into the screen, no cotton barrier blocking his view, he instantly moans out your name. His dick twitches in his pants, an uncomfortable sensation that fuels him fervent. “Why is this so hot?” he asks you, palm soaring over his length to rub it softly. “Let me see more.”
You pull your shirt down, straining the material. ���What was that?” you ask, playful with a wink.
“God.” Jimin rakes a hand through his hair, frustrated with a strong compulsion to fuck you senseless. If only you are here next to him. “Let me see you,” he orders. “Babe.”
“Yes?” you respond, feigning innocence.
Jimin tries to distract himself, attempting to restrict every fiber of his being to give into his ardent want for you. But all he sees on the small, bright blue screen is your figure popping out of the darkness, barely any illumination in your room aside from the silly desk lamp at the corner.
“I want to see you,” he demands. “Now.”
“Do you?”
“Babe!” he exclaims, frustration twirling with his tone. “P-please…” he begs shamefully.
You cannot help but chuckle airly at the single, simple word that he voices. And all you want to do is provide him with more. “Alright,” you hum. You cross your arms at the thick hem of your tee, lifting it up so quickly and stripping yourself of the material completely. The only thing Jimin is left to marvel at is your whole naked body — which is way more than what he has expected.
The sight of your breasts, curves, and wet pussy is all visible to him, and all he wants to do is place his hands on you. “Baby…” he mumbles, eyes glueing onto the small flat monitor. His mouth is agape, practically drooling over your appearance and oh, how it feeds his agonizing fancies.
You grab onto one of your breasts, squeezing it in the palm of your hand while the other trails down to your core, grazing your skin. Your body heats up at the enlivening sensation, amorous aspirations soon inclining to Jimin’s level. You slide two fingers down your pussy, succulence coating your digits before you prop yourself back on your elbows in front of the screen, ending Jimin’s prolonged show.
“Shit,” he murmurs. “Baby, you’re so hot.”
You blow the few free strands of hair away from your face, sheening a grin at him. “Jimin,” you tease, “let me see you now.”
“W-what? Can you go back to the–”
“—Jimin,” you complain, lips pursing into a pout. “I want you so bad,” you tell him. “Didn’t you see that?”
Jimin throws his head back. “Fuck, I did,” he responds and scoots back on his bed. Jimin strips himself of his tee and tosses it elsewhere prior to palming his hard length over his pants. His bulge is prominent, outstanding, and it makes your mouth water at the sight. His movements are incredibly intricate, as if he is trying to act perfectly to rouse him to the edge — all to the sight of you.
He remembers your scene perfectly: how beautiful you looked groping your own breast, breathy moans leaving your mouth and all he ached to do at that moment was to shut you up with his own. He imagines himself being the one teasing you, provoking you to act on oscillation with your fingers digging into your soaking cunt. Fuck, how wet you are right now. Jimin craves another taste, just how he has for the past few months. He cannot fathom how incredible you will be, and how ready he is to relish in such honey.
He moans, body heat rising to almost temperate sensations all fired by sensuality. He grips onto his hard member over his sweats, dragging it to the base and back up to the tip. A wet spot forms on his pants, more than visible, and all you can do is titter.
“Jimin,” you whisper, “let me see you.”
He frantically nods, obeying your words without hesitation. With both of his hands he gains a grip on the waistband of his sweats and boxers, dragging them down to his knees, lazy to take them off completely. Your eyes broaden at the way his hard length springs against his lower abdomen, tip an angry scarlet.
“Mm, baby, you’re so hard,” you point out proudly.
Jimin chuckles, struggling and shifting in his position. “All because of you.”
He gains a firm grasp around his solid length, toying with the tip of his dick first before jerking his wrist lightly on his length. Occasionally, he runs his thumb over his leaking slit to spread the precum around the head. His hips jerk up into his hold, grasp becoming tight with every thrust. “Ugh,” Jimin groans, “I- ah- want to be inside of you already.”
You watch as he quickens his movements, motions becoming sloppy and quicker. Jimin has to take periodical breathers from the overwhelming pleasure, his hard length slowly tinting an angry red from the tip down.
“Touch yourself again,” he orders, “let me see you fuck your own fingers for me.”
You smile, fulfilling his command. You tilt your screen a little and sit back again, providing the perfect view of your dripping pussy. Keeping yourself propped on your elbow, your other hand diverges from your core to your chest, squeezing it one last time in front of the camera for Jimin.
Jimin slips his hand underneath the flimsy material of his tee, palm roaming all over his abdomen and chest before he toys with his nipples underneath the material. “Fuck,” he murmurs, head dangling as he intakes a deep breath.
“Baby,” you call, “look at me—watch me.”
He raises his gaze to the screen, only to find the most bewitching scene waiting for him. You are rubbing your sopping pussy, merciless and ardent to arouse you even further.
The sight of you pressing and rubbing firm circles over your cunt causes him to halt his movements just so he can watch. You begin to unravel under your own touch, the lewd thoughts of Jimin intoxicating your mind. You treat your body with care — the opposite of what Jimin intends to do when you meet him in person.
Fuck, you cannot even draw faint pictures in your imagination of Jimin’s tongue lapping at your cunt, licking every ounce of your juices as he dives in to pleasure you. He has constantly been craving that since the day you first met him, and pesters you constantly on how he craves that by the clock.
When you slip one digit into your hole, your finger then drenching in your arousal, Jimin rips a groan from his throat instantly. “Mm, Jimin,” you beckon him, head throwing back from delight. “I need to feel you inside of me,” you moan.
“Ah, baby.” Jimin feels himself run weak at your words, satisfied with your status. “Just imagine your fingers are my dick.”
“But it’s hard,” you complain.
Jimin laughs, voicing a jest, “I am hard.” Jimin watches you slip in another finger, joy swimming in his veins from you providing your own amusement. “Add another finger, I know you can take three,” he demands, content.
“B-but—”
“—add another finger,” he repeats, tone lacing with poison.
You bite back your words and swallow your breath, bracing for the sharp pain as you stretch your pussy out for him. And so you do.
“Good girl,” he praises with a smirk. Jimin starts to pump himself to the rhythm of his heavy heartbeats, a melody that swirls with your sweet sighs and gentle cries for him. The squelch of your fingers keeps his senses keen, providing him with a vigorous desire to push you to the edge. He starts to tweak at his own nipples again while he jacks himself off, almost turbulently.
You start to grind yourself onto your own hand, pouring every ounce of your titillating desires into your actions, urging yourself a step closer to release. Softly, you moan when you curl your fingers and hit your own sweet spot.
“Fuck, you sound amazing.” Jimin speeds up his actions, grip painfully tight on his member as he does all he can to drag him to his release. He removes his other hand from under his shirt and sails it to his balls, fondling them and showing them just as much love. He hunches over, thighs beginning to quiver — a signal that he is close to cumming.
“Ah, Jimin,” you cry and sit up, fingers still propelling inside of your core. You use your free hand to squeeze your breasts, playing around with the nubs to induce your state of extreme elation. “J-Jimin…”
“Baby, that’s- ah- right,” he says with a smirk. “How do I feel?”
You clamp your eyes shut, pitch running high. “S-so good, you feel so good and I want more.”
“Oh, baby, you’ll get more tomorrow.” He suggests in between breaths, “I’ll let you grind on my thighs, ride my cock—anything. Wouldn’t you like that?”
Fuck, the thought of you topping Jimin leads you into nothing more but a dead end of delirious thrills. “Mm, yes baby,” you utter.
“I’d be, agh, more than happy to eat you out—to have you cum so many fucking times until you are begging for me to stop.”
Your body jerks and you hopelessly fall onto the mattress, back arching as you prepare to release. There is a tight feeling in your stomach, an intense amount of heat emitting from that same area, and your mind starts to enter its own frenzy. “J-Jimin,” you pant, tone needy and brittle as you attempt to shield your loud cries.
You quicken your pace, fingers fluidly moving in and out of your cunt, arousal leaking and coating your digits with every smooth entry. You curl your fingers every so often, driving yourself to a fervent paradise. Mutters of his name become slurred with your lush moans of delectation, and it prompts Jimin closer to his edge.
“That’s right baby,” Jimin huffs. “Ah, you sound so good. You would feel so good.”
“Jimin! M-make me cum, please,” you beg, one hand soaring to twist into your thin sheets. But that action alone does not stall your longing.
Jimin chuckles, his motions on his shaft quick, smooth. “Keep fucking yourself, my dirty baby girl.”
You groan at the name; his jaw hangs open to release a deep groan, sweet nothings pouring from his lips. “Jimin…”
“What do- agh- you want?” he muses, still finding it a struggle to speak.
“I-I need you to fill me up… I need you inside of me so fucking bad—please.” Tears begin to well at your eyes from your mind being sent into an overdrive, extreme pleasure coming over your body in waftures. You feel so weak in your own touch — under Jimin’s words. All you desperately want to do is cum.
Jimin clasps harder with the last bits of his strength over his pulsating member, bumping up the friction by also rolling his hips into his hand. Jimin roots his hand into his mattress, trying to remain upright as he powers through his arriving goal.
“Mm, baby,” he chuckles, “you look so good fucking yourself like that—touching yourself for me. Shit, how does that feel? Good, but you know I can do better. No one can fuck you like I will.”
Jimin throws his head back and bites the outline of his lip, his warm cum shooting out of his member and onto his shirt. The creamy liquid seeps into the material, ready to stain it, but Jimin still tries to jerk himself empty with haste. It appears as if he has lost control, the only action he can willfully commit is living up to the amorous action.
You watch as his movements wither slowly, but soon after your orgasm arrives in miniature ripples.
“F-fuck,” you utter. It feels as if the heat contained in your body has finally erupted, nothing but raw euphoria taking over your body. Utterances spill from your lips mindlessly, thoughts a whirlwind and you remain niche for the most part.
Jimin peers at you on the screen past the blanket of his lashes, joyous rapture finally dissipating at the seams.
With a final huff of his name, your body feels as light as a feather. You fluidly pump yourself through your release, a high heaven that you seems like you have not felt in ages. You watch Jimin near the screen, his hand wiping on his tee, and he sheens a sly grin.
“What?” you ask with a deep breath.
Jimin chuckles. “Taste yourself.”
“I- what?” you ask, a part of you hoping this is another one of his silly jests.
Jimin urges you to continue, a glint in his eyes almost irresistible. “You heard me, let me see you taste your- whoa…”
Before you allow Jimin to finish his command you raise your hand to your mouth and prop the digits inside, tongue swirling around them, relishing in your own juices. Your inch closer to the webcam, ridding of the large proximity to make sure that Jimin gets a view of his desired show.
“Baby… you’re so fucking gorgeous,” he lets out with a laugh. “Thank you.”
You groan, tired from the incident, and collapse on the bed with your body feeling as light as a feather. The soft of your sheets practically engulf you, pulling you in for a night’s rest after, yet another, heated skype sex session.
Within moments your laptop is long forgotten along with Jimin’s presence, and you finally give into the fatigue that has been prolonged for Jimin’s satisfaction.
God, you might be seeing him tomorrow, but tonight is entirely worth it,
The last thing you hear before your mind shuts off is Jimin mumbling, “I love you.”
When you groggily wake the next morning you take a weary peak at your phone, only to find seven missed calls from Jimin awaiting you.
You pause for a second, mind too tired to process the reasoning behind it, until it hits you:
Peering at the time, you missed your flight to Jimin three and a half hours ago.
#ba dum tssst#bts#bts smut#jimin smut#bts scenarios#jimin scenario#bts jimin#jimin#bangan boys#bts imagines#woohoo more of jen's#writing
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my thoughts/reactions while reading Kingdom of Ash
Nooo it’s Aedion x Lysandra all the way
Darrow is such an asshole
Ayyyy it’s Nox!! Ya boi is back!
Damn, everyone is hungry for sex
babies already?!
Rowan please rest
That’s right Elide you give him that cold shoulder mhm
Ugh, darn that was sweet of Lorcan to shred his shirt for her blood
Oh snap that messenger almost revealed Lysandra’s true form omg I seriously thought everyone was going to find out that she’s just been pretending to be Aelin
I need more Ilias but please protect him!
Aelin no queen don’t give up
FENRYYYSSSSS! NOOOO DON’T, FENRYYYYYYYS!!
Oh thank god Fenrys you almost broke my broken heart
wait nooooo Fenrys nonononono please no oh damn it I really thought...
OH WAIT YESS.. YESSSSS. HELL FUCKING YES DO IT AELIN SAY THE MAGIC WORD. COME ON FENRYS LET’S GO BOIII YEEEEEE YOU GONNA LIVE OR SO HELP ME ahahaha HE LIVES PRAISE BE TO MALA AND AELIN
Wait I still don’t get it: whom did Dorian want to shift into? what did the golden hair mean?
Aw damn Manon & the 13 getting their hands dirty for the fallen :(
KALTAIN?! did not expect you :’(
the Little Folk are so cute but at the same time I envision them as those creatures from the horror film Don’t Be Afraid of the Dark
Aww Fenrys hugging Aelin tugs at my heartstrings!
LOOOL ofc Aelin you would so raid treasure from the dead but it does make sense yeah
Everyone giving Lorcan the cold shoulder is pretty amusing
I’m on Chapter 39 already?! I feel pretty lost without a Table of Contents
Awww I am absolutely living for the blink communication between Aelin and Fenrys!
I need a longer Rowaelin sex scene please
Ok but the battle at Anielle reminds me of the Battle of Helm's Deep from LOTR, especially when Princess Hasar and her army arrive to flank Morath
NOO AEDION! LYSANDRA! COME ON!
A witch tower?! Holy shit omg I hope no character I know just died in that group of 4k soldiers that are now dust in the wind
Aelin is reuniting with Chaol, Nesryn, Yrene, and Falkan!! Omg oh my fuck nuts it is HAPPENING.
Ok seriously the battle at Anielle's Keep really reminds me of the Battle at Helm's Deep
Manon yaaaas Queen light 🔥 it 🔥 up 🔥
Aedion please hang on gods he's taking the worse of it this whole story
I agree with Lysandra he cannot just apologize and all is forgiven just like that bc seriously it took her to be nearly killed for him to apologize? But at the same time poor Aedion
Fuck you Darrow you worthless pos
Omg is Aelin going to stop the dam with her water powers?! Oh ok that's cool too
Chaol's father is such an ass
Yrene/healers are basically a metaphor for killing the enemy with kindness
ROLFE FUCKING FINALLY DUDE WHERE YOU BEEN BUT AAAYYY YOU CAME THROUGH THANK GODS
I legit started tearing up when Manon and the witches began lighting the hearth fires calling all other witches scattered to heed the call of their Witch Queen and go to war
Major LOTR vibes when everyone started responding to Terrasen's call for aid but ffs Aedion why didn't you call for aid earlier?
Everyone is getting smutty sexy time but Rowaelin :(
Please I need to see more of Ilias, Ansel, Rolfe, Nox and Falkan pleeaassee it's been years
Everyone's going to Terrasen now ahhhhh
Dorian no oh damn it Dorian yes but be careful
WTF Erawan was seeking Maeve and now she just waltzes right to him and now they're conniving together?! Surprised, but also not surprised. Erawan probably doesn't know she's the runaway wife of his brother... they would make such a power couple though
Aw fucking hell Dorian
Dorian wtf you are out of your mind blegh I can't imagine you with Maeve
Dorian agh jfc are you serious. You had one job. One job....
Ohhh I see. I judged you too soon Dorian, nice work!
Awww YEAH BABY. I am literally tearing up. Just when Aedion and co. Thought it was over, Manon swoops in with her army! I can just imagine the entire scene :')
PETRAH IS THE MVP
What no no no oh no I am crying ... the 13 are the true MVP oh God damn it
Bruh I am choking up at the 13's sacrifice and everyone paying their respects I am so close to crying
Bruh I'm listening to the Haunting of Hil House OST while reading the scene where Dorian and Aelin are using the Wyrdkeys and wtf is happening
Oh wtf?! Dorian's father of all people to appear?!
UWWAAH HOLY SHIT THAT PLOT TWIST I NEVER THOUGHT ABOUT DORIAN'S FATHER AND NOOO AELIN
BROOO AELIN JUST PASSED BY FEYRE AND RHYSAND'S WORLD SHE MADE A CAMEO IN THEIR UNIVERSE
Aw man she lost most of her power but guess that's the price to pay :'(
I ALWAYS IMAGINED AELIN RIDING THE LORD OF THE NORTH INTO BATTLE (I was listening to The Hobbit Battle of the 5 Armies OST) AND IT HAPPENED
NOOO GAVRIEL! Man I knew he'd do this for his son 😭
Where is Nox amongst all of this?
Come on Aelin come on you can do this!
Yes Rowan and the Cadre have arrived and--oh crap FENRYS NO NOT AGAIN--ROWAN--MY HANDSOME FAE WARRIORS NOOO
"Dorian" well who would have guessed that was his father's name
Did NOT expect Fenrys to be the one to deal the first blow almost thought it was the killing blow
YRENE IS THE TRUE MVP
"Lord Lorcan Lochan" try saying that 5x fast
I'm done and I feel empty... I feel like the book could have been a bit longer because some moments did feel rushed. I'm still wondering what the hell happened to Nox because he just ghosted halfway through the book and never made another reappearance
There wasn't as many difficult losses as I feared for and that's good but I still cry over the 13 and Gavriel and & Murtaugh
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zoom bday party chat TT___TT
21:12:05 From song kang : IM STILL TRYING TO FIGURE OUT HOW TO SHOW EVERYONE ON MY SCREEN 21:12:13 From song kang : how will i take a cute picture if I can only see one person 21:12:27 From Uyen Irene Tran : it’s on the top right 21:12:34 From Uyen Irene Tran : it’s called Gallery View 22:22:26 From Jio Lee : my sister’s gonna wash caleb in the room that i was in :-\\\ 22:22:31 From Jio Lee : and my brother’s doing his zoom class in here 22:22:41 From Jio Lee : cause he’s weird 22:22:43 From Jio Lee : and he’s like 31 22:22:48 From Jio Lee : and he’s taking data science 22:22:52 From Jio Lee : yeah 22:22:55 From Jio Lee : masters 22:23:07 From Jio Lee : you see this empty spot next to my head 22:23:13 From Jio Lee : caleb ripped my polaroid off 22:23:26 From Jio Lee : he came in here 22:23:27 From Jio Lee : YEAH 22:23:31 From Jio Lee : WHILE I WAS SLEEPINGGG 22:23:49 From Jio Lee : are they sleeping 22:23:53 From Jio Lee : my brother’s in here lMFAO 22:25:04 From Jio Lee : in the closet 22:25:21 From Jio Lee : it’s on the ground!!!!! 22:26:14 From Jio Lee : you keep your shoes in your room 22:27:11 From Jio Lee : i wanted one of those clothing racks but my room at home is too damn small 22:27:27 From Jio Lee : ive been looking at them on wayfair 22:28:08 From Jio Lee : it’s like 50 dollars bro 22:28:24 From Jio Lee : YALL 22:28:30 From Jio Lee : let me show you the apartments im gonna move in to hopefully 22:28:35 From Jio Lee : help me think of how to design it 22:28:51 From Jio Lee : single but i share the apt 22:29:18 From Jio Lee : omg i have to quit zoom to screenshare hold on 22:31:14 From Jio Lee : all the rooms 22:31:15 From Jio Lee : look like that 22:31:17 From Jio Lee : in that apt 22:31:25 From Jio Lee : maybe 22:31:31 From Jio Lee : but i think i could like shove it into the corner 22:31:36 From Jio Lee : and then put a full body mirror next to it 22:31:45 From Jio Lee : lemme check 22:32:18 From Jio Lee : it’s like 18k a year 22:32:21 From Jio Lee : i know 22:32:26 From Jio Lee : sf baby 22:32:34 From Jio Lee : san fran rent be wack 22:32:38 From Jio Lee : a studio’s hitting like 4k 22:32:50 From Jio Lee : i KNOW 22:33:03 From Jio Lee : san fran is wild bro 22:33:23 From Jio Lee : just me 22:33:29 From Jio Lee : it’s like 1k a month? 22:33:31 From Jio Lee : yeah 22:33:33 From Jio Lee : included 22:33:38 From Jio Lee : i kNOW 22:33:41 From Jio Lee : bro i know 22:33:45 From Jio Lee : but you get an in unit laundry machine 22:33:50 From Jio Lee : and stove + appliances 22:33:53 From Jio Lee : so i’m likeeee ok that’s fair 22:34:00 From Jio Lee : bro the dorms are expensive too 22:34:03 From Jio Lee : they’re like 14k for a triple 22:34:21 From Jio Lee : off campus rooms are like 22:34:24 From Jio Lee : 800 a month minimum 22:34:30 From Jio Lee : and you share with like 1-2 other people 22:34:43 From Jio Lee : it’s like 800 + utilities 22:34:55 From Jio Lee : i’m getting my money’s worth 22:35:03 From Jio Lee : bro the flight ticket 22:35:06 From Jio Lee : is like 150 22:35:15 From Jio Lee : 150 roundtrip 22:35:17 From Jio Lee : for an hour????? 22:35:32 From Jio Lee : A HUNDRED 22:35:40 From Jio Lee : let’s go to paris 22:35:45 From Jio Lee : buy a hazmat suit 22:37:24 From Jio Lee : bro my friend was going back home to thailand from the uk 22:37:28 From Jio Lee : and people were out here wearing hazmat suits 22:37:34 From Jio Lee : yeah she was like 22:37:39 From Jio Lee : i was obviously underdressed 22:37:59 From Jio Lee : she had a mask and gloves on and she was like ????? 22:38:08 From Jio Lee : uk was bad 22:38:20 From Jio Lee : i heard vietnam is reopening 22:40:08 From Jio Lee : dude i never heard about your bf 22:40:12 From Jio Lee : how’d that happen 22:40:43 From Jio Lee : scandalous 22:40:44 From kang : a true modern day love story 22:41:04 From Jio Lee : so you guys switched LOL 22:41:21 From kang : this is why u can never trust female friends 22:41:24 From Jio Lee : ^ 22:41:29 From Lilie Mai : ^^^^ 22:42:19 From Jio Lee : that’s weird 22:42:48 From Jio Lee : wtf LOL 22:42:53 From Jio Lee : men 22:43:29 From Jio Lee : a drunk text 22:45:49 From Jio Lee : interesting 22:45:50 From Jio Lee : LMAO 22:46:20 From kang : AND THEN WHAT DID U DO 22:46:21 From kang : HUH 22:46:23 From Jio Lee : LMAOOO 22:46:25 From Jio Lee : SHE TEXTED HIM 22:46:31 From kang : this is so random but jio has such a small head 22:46:33 From kang : how it do that 22:46:33 From Jio Lee : LMFAO 22:46:53 From Jio Lee : I TRIED THAT THING 22:46:57 From Jio Lee : WHERE YOU PUT YOUR FACE BEHIND A PIECE OF TISSUE 22:47:00 From Jio Lee : LIKE TISSUE PAPER 22:47:03 From Jio Lee : IT WORKED LMFAO 22:47:06 From kang : teach us ur ways 22:47:13 From Jio Lee : like the toilet paper 22:47:28 From kang : whose mans 22:47:29 From Jio Lee : if you like turn it one way 22:47:30 From Jio Lee : it works 22:47:31 From Jio Lee : omg 22:47:31 From kang : my head: huge 22:47:34 From Jio Lee : his head is so small 22:47:59 From kang : so many idols had loose fitting masks 22:48:01 From kang : and im like how 22:48:08 From Jio Lee : oh the face masks 22:48:09 From kang : my mask: full 22:48:35 From kang : my cheeks be too chubby 22:48:56 From kang : i can make an egg 22:49:01 From Jio Lee : i put your letters up here 22:49:04 From Jio Lee : next to my polaroids 22:49:14 From Jio Lee : i couldnt put seoyoung’s cause it had korean curse words 22:49:20 From Jio Lee : but i have it kept in my book shelf 22:49:21 From Jio Lee : very safe 22:49:32 From Jio Lee : didnt want my mom being like 22:49:37 From Jio Lee : who tf is cursing at you through snail mail 22:49:43 From kang : SNAIL MAIL CURSING 22:49:46 From kang : DLKFDKSJFKJDSH 22:49:50 From kang : my specialty 22:49:53 From Jio Lee : LMFAOOO 22:49:56 From Jio Lee : i have like four korean friends 22:50:01 From Jio Lee : it’s my goal to make korean friends at cal 22:50:02 From kang : same i have like two 22:50:05 From kang : rose dont count 22:50:08 From Jio Lee : LMFAOO 22:50:25 From kang : bring me my rich korean boyfriend 22:50:34 From Jio Lee : LMFAOO 22:50:38 From Jio Lee : the business school at cal is called haas 22:50:42 From Jio Lee : so they call the guys there haasholes 22:50:54 From kang : my friend went to a dive thru 22:51:04 From kang : drive 22:51:07 From Jio Lee : omg 22:51:13 From Jio Lee : i heard they shove a q tip up your nose 22:51:20 From Jio Lee : until it feels like it pokes your brain 22:51:24 From kang : she lives in new york and she went to a drive thru test 22:51:37 From Jio Lee : apparently it goes up to like 22:51:39 From Jio Lee : your sinuses 22:52:05 From Jio Lee : my eye used to flutter too 22:52:26 From Jio Lee : that helps 22:52:43 From kang : i love eyeliner 22:52:49 From kang : i always be looking like a raccon tho 22:52:53 From Jio Lee : my eyeliner’s always uneven 22:53:03 From kang : saem bcs my eyes are uneven 22:53:05 From Jio Lee : IVE BEEN TRYING TO LEARN HOW TO WING IT 22:53:09 From Jio Lee : so i keep winging it 22:53:11 From Jio Lee : but one’s always higher 22:53:15 From kang : do u guys see MY EYES R UNEVEN 22:53:24 From Jio Lee : you just go straight out 22:53:26 From Jio Lee : and then 22:53:27 From Jio Lee : you like 22:53:29 From Jio Lee : triangle it up 22:53:31 From Jio Lee : from the bottom 22:53:38 From kang : its true 22:53:42 From kang : thats what i do 22:53:51 From Jio Lee : oh yeah ive seen the videos 22:53:55 From Jio Lee : but like you gotta be white 22:54:01 From kang : u gotta like draw a straight line and then draw a triangle up 22:54:03 From Jio Lee : white people have enough space 22:54:09 From kang : my eyes be too droopy 22:54:14 From kang : to do foxy eyes 22:54:16 From Jio Lee : my eyes are too round 22:55:04 From kang : we are all deformed 22:55:12 From Jio Lee : one side of my face is significantly flatter than the other 22:55:16 From Jio Lee : because i slept on that side 22:55:26 From kang : bruh i sleep on my stomach 22:55:27 From Jio Lee : i’ve been trying to flatten the other side 22:55:31 From kang : apparently it fucks up your chin 22:55:46 From kang : i heard u lose weight when u sleep on your back 22:55:50 From Jio Lee : rly wtf 22:55:59 From Jio Lee : my nephew sleeps on his stomach 22:56:07 From kang : yeah u gotta sleep on your back and lift your arms above your head 22:56:13 From Jio Lee : THAT’S HOW I SLEEP HAHA 22:56:20 From kang : and you’ll lose weight 22:56:26 From Jio Lee : sometimes when iwake up i lose all feeling in one arm 22:56:34 From kang : but you’ll literally fuck ur chin shape up if u sleep on ur stomach 22:57:20 From Jio Lee : im gonna get that nose surgery 22:57:23 From Jio Lee : then it’s over for everyone 22:57:26 From kang : my dad had to go to work at his gas station bcs one of his employees called out 22:57:33 From Jio Lee : LMFAO 22:57:37 From Jio Lee : THE SHIELD 22:57:44 From kang : IT LOOKS LIKE AFISHBOWL 22:57:50 From kang : yeah he comes home in like an hour 22:57:58 From kang : he made the plastic shield tho 22:58:00 From kang : IT KILLED ME 22:58:09 From Jio Lee : bro i saw someone pull their hoodie up and pull on the strings all the way 22:58:13 From Jio Lee : and put the pot lid in front of their face 22:58:17 From Jio Lee : so it was a makeshift shield 22:58:24 From Jio Lee : it looked so effective 22:58:26 From kang : HOW THEY GONNA SEE 22:58:29 From kang : ohhhhhh 22:58:29 From Jio Lee : it’s glass 22:58:30 From Jio Lee : HAHAH 22:58:39 From kang : WHY DID UYEN HAVE A POT LID ON HAND 22:58:42 From Jio Lee : but the handle’s in the front 22:58:46 From kang : SHE JUST PULLED IT OUT 22:58:48 From Jio Lee : dorm life 22:59:06 From Jio Lee : do you have a single 22:59:10 From kang : are there people in ur dorm 22:59:13 From kang : why didnt they go home 22:59:19 From Jio Lee : oh LOL 22:59:59 From Jio Lee : wait what 23:00:03 From Jio Lee : oh 23:00:03 From Jio Lee : LOL 23:01:42 From kang : white ppl things 23:02:04 From kang : i think so 23:02:38 From kang : excuse me 23:03:22 From kang : thats why i dont offer anything to anyone 23:03:48 From Jio Lee : damn imagine if you had your party now 23:04:01 From kang : im so hungry 23:04:05 From kang : to eat or to not eat 23:04:09 From Jio Lee : water is your best friend 23:04:14 From kang : rip 23:04:22 From kang : i FINISHED 23:04:25 From kang : u want me to wet the bed 23:05:02 From kang : my dad always told me if i eat watermelon before bed I WILL WET THE BED 23:05:08 From Jio Lee : bro some white girls copied apink’s choreo for a “tiktok challenge” 23:05:37 From Jio Lee : wild 23:05:44 From Jio Lee : they claimed it was theirs 23:05:45 From kang : cultural aPPROPRIATION 23:05:51 From Jio Lee : and then they blocked off comments or something 23:06:03 From kang : white ppl: stealing cultures since day 1 23:06:33 From kang : whites have no culture to steal 23:06:36 From kang : what r we gonna steal 23:06:39 From kang : grilled cheese? 23:06:41 From kang : we dont want it 23:06:57 From kang : I HATE CHEESE 23:07:04 From Jio Lee : my brother b playing league in my room now 23:07:08 From Jio Lee : and his class is still going on 23:07:15 From kang : im playing league 23:07:18 From kang : dont hate on us 23:07:22 From Jio Lee : LMAOO i made an acc 23:07:27 From Jio Lee : but i haven’t played 23:07:32 From kang : NOT RIGHT NOW BUT IN GENERAL 23:07:44 From Jio Lee : im gonna be a twitch girl 23:07:53 From kang : i suck too much TO STREAM 23:07:56 From Jio Lee : ok same tho 23:07:57 From Jio Lee : i suck 23:07:59 From kang : I LOSE EVERY GAME 23:08:02 From Jio Lee : we can just get decently good 23:08:06 From Jio Lee : and then be like here’s my venmo 23:08:25 From kang : im not cute like that 23:08:29 From kang : maybe in my next life 23:08:31 From Jio Lee : ^ 23:08:35 From Jio Lee : i’m gonna take my dad’s dslr to sf 23:08:44 From Jio Lee : and i’m gonna become a youtuber and pay for my tuition through youtube money 23:08:58 From kang : when u got a full ride tHO 23:09:01 From kang : SHUT UP JIO 23:09:07 From Jio Lee : HAHAH BUT I NEED 용돈 23:09:26 From Jio Lee : so versatile 23:10:08 From Jio Lee : bro i finally paid off my credit card in full 23:10:12 From Jio Lee : my credit boutta skyrocket 23:10:18 From Jio Lee : time to make a new one 23:10:24 From kang : omg i wish 23:10:25 From Jio Lee : LMFAOO 23:10:32 From kang : i have 1500 on my credit card 23:10:37 From kang : but will i pay it off: no 23:10:44 From Jio Lee : LMAOO isnt it cause you got a laptop 23:10:51 From kang : YEAH AND I KEEP SPENDING MONEY 23:10:57 From Jio Lee : chase freedom 23:10:57 From kang : get discover 23:10:58 From Jio Lee : is the best 23:11:09 From kang : if u get a referral u get 23:11:11 From Jio Lee : discover isn’t taken at a lot of places so it gets annoying 23:11:12 From kang : $50 23:11:31 From kang : when i opened my discover card i only opened it bcs my friend had a referral code 23:12:02 From kang : omg i lied i only owe 1200 on my credit card 23:12:04 From kang : thanks dad 23:12:48 From Jio Lee : some guy i went out on a date with 23:12:51 From Jio Lee : had a spongebob meme on his 23:12:55 From Jio Lee : yeah but it wasn’t worth it 23:12:57 From Jio Lee : LMFAOO 23:13:10 From Jio Lee : he changed his name on zoom to jim halpert 23:13:20 From Jio Lee : NO HIS NAME IS MICHAEL 23:13:20 From Jio Lee : LMFAOO 23:13:23 From Jio Lee : HE SHOULD’VE DONE MICHAEL SCOTT 23:13:42 From Jio Lee : everyone wants to be jim 23:13:49 From Jio Lee : REALLY LOL 23:13:51 From Jio Lee : i love dwight 23:13:56 From Jio Lee : i think dwight’s my favorite character 23:14:05 From Jio Lee : he is 23:14:08 From Jio Lee : LOL KELLY 23:14:16 From Jio Lee : WHEN SHE BECAME MINORITY EXECUTIVE 23:14:29 From Jio Lee : bro it’s leaving netflix 23:14:45 From Jio Lee : i think it’s leaving in 2020 23:14:51 From Jio Lee : they pushed up the date or something 23:14:55 From Jio Lee : lol i jacked my friend’s hulu 23:15:05 From Jio Lee : how much is the nbc one 23:15:12 From Jio Lee : damn 23:15:16 From Jio Lee : im gonna get it lOL 23:15:21 From Jio Lee : just so i can watch the office 23:15:27 From Jio Lee : same i might just buy the show 23:15:53 From Jio Lee : dude i think iw atched the office like 10 times 23:15:55 From Uyen Irene Tran : https://soap2day.to 23:15:56 From Jio Lee : i’m on season 7 23:16:26 From kang : ok i have a review session at 7am so i will sleep 23:16:28 From kang : gn chingus 23:16:48 From Jio Lee : bro i’ve been on shein putting stuff in my cart 23:16:52 From Jio Lee : and some clothes are so hoe like 23:17:14 From Jio Lee : WHAT 23:17:18 From Jio Lee : HOW OLD IS SHE 23:17:19 From Jio Lee : holy shit 23:17:44 From Jio Lee : LOL wtf 23:17:46 From Jio Lee : then you have to pay 23:18:01 From Jio Lee : be that girl that wears white 23:18:36 From Jio Lee : yikess 23:18:52 From Jio Lee : 20 omg 23:19:38 From Jio Lee : that’s so young 23:19:42 From Jio Lee : she’s gonna have a kid by like 24 23:20:06 From Jio Lee : damn bro 23:20:17 From Jio Lee : dude some girl i went to middle school with 23:20:18 From Jio Lee : she has a kid 23:20:22 From Jio Lee : and she’s our age 23:20:32 From Jio Lee : but is her man even rich 23:20:45 From Jio Lee : yikes 23:21:02 From Jio Lee : she said this man is UGLY 23:21:07 From Jio Lee : facts 23:21:09 From Jio Lee : he’s RICH 23:21:11 From Jio Lee : he’s probably rolling in it 23:21:18 From Jio Lee : SHOTGUN WEDDING 23:21:20 From Jio Lee : omg 23:21:22 From Jio Lee : he is ugly 23:21:52 From Jio Lee : their kid boutta be 4 feet 9 23:22:03 From Jio Lee : omg if it’s a boy 23:22:07 From Jio Lee : that boy is not getting any girls 23:22:58 From Jio Lee : i keep forgetting uyen’s english name is irene 23:23:03 From Jio Lee : and i saw the irene and i was like 23:23:06 From Jio Lee : irene??? 23:23:33 From Jio Lee : LMAOO 23:23:47 From Jio Lee : bro i want an english name cause people be butchering my name left and right 23:23:54 From Jio Lee : in asian ass california 23:24:52 From Jio Lee : yikes 23:25:11 From Jio Lee : broooo 23:25:23 From Jio Lee : LMAOO 23:25:27 From Jio Lee : SHE SAID IM GONNA BE IRENE 23:25:36 From Jio Lee : irene’s a cute name though 23:25:48 From Jio Lee : that timing 23:25:59 From Jio Lee : they’re like 23:26:00 From Jio Lee : JAI OH?? 23:26:10 From Jio Lee : sometimes they’re like 23:26:11 From Jio Lee : jia 23:26:13 From Jio Lee : and im like 23:26:15 From Jio Lee : it’s a whole ass o 23:26:24 From Jio Lee : so time to adopt an english name 23:26:27 From Jio Lee : i hate that 23:26:44 From Jio Lee : it looks like my though 23:26:53 From Jio Lee : like it looks like it would be my 23:27:03 From Jio Lee : HAHAH DAISY MAE 23:27:57 From Jio Lee : bro you’ve been taking chinese for so long 23:28:15 From Jio Lee : i stopped taking korean after hs 23:28:29 From Jio Lee : i had like 23:28:32 From Jio Lee : the foreign language req 23:28:35 From Jio Lee : and i just took korean 23:28:39 From Jio Lee : because i didnt wanna do spanish or french 23:29:15 From Jio Lee : bro i was gonna apply to amherst 23:29:18 From Jio Lee : but their app was so annoying 23:29:54 From Jio Lee : you should come to a uc HAHAH 23:29:58 From Jio Lee : come to cal 23:30:08 From Jio Lee : oh rly 23:30:11 From Jio Lee : it’s like 4 prompts 23:30:17 From Jio Lee : COME TO CAL 23:30:18 From Jio Lee : HAHA 23:32:10 From Jio Lee : bro my friend goes to bu and apparently they’re thinking of shutting down the fall semester completely 23:32:21 From Jio Lee : like not even having class 23:32:37 From Jio Lee : yeah cause you can’t make students pay for zoom university 23:32:43 From Jio Lee : and they still have to pay the profs 23:33:22 From Jio Lee : i know uci made students pay for facilities they can’t use 23:34:02 From Jio Lee : bro LOL my friend bought an animal crossing switch cause she got her housing refunded 23:34:46 From Jio Lee : broooo 23:35:31 From Jio Lee : my friend bought one for 650 23:35:39 From Jio Lee : cause he was desperate 23:35:42 From Jio Lee : but he hasn’t opened it 23:35:47 From Jio Lee : he’s gonna wait for the restock 23:35:53 From Jio Lee : bro get animal crossinggg 23:35:53 From Jio Lee : yeah 23:35:56 From Jio Lee : so like if it restocks 23:36:07 From Jio Lee : bro i want one for myself 23:36:09 From Jio Lee : i use my family’s switch 23:36:29 From Jio Lee : the coral one is pretty 23:36:32 From Jio Lee : yeah bro 23:36:34 From Jio Lee : i wanna hook it up 23:36:42 From Jio Lee : HAHA 23:36:47 From Jio Lee : the se is so small 23:36:57 From Jio Lee : i think so 23:37:00 From Jio Lee : bro wtf LOL 23:37:10 From Jio Lee : that’s wack 23:37:16 From Jio Lee : im pretty sure 12 is coming out in september 23:37:25 From Jio Lee : unless the production was pushed back cause of covid 23:37:52 From Jio Lee : ANDROID 23:38:01 From Jio Lee : huawei 23:38:02 From Jio Lee : HAHA 23:38:33 From Jio Lee : bro im just waiting for the 12 23:38:39 From Jio Lee : my phone’s battery dies so fast 23:38:59 From Jio Lee : the galaxy interface is so weirdly counterintuitive 23:39:10 From Jio Lee : WITH THE PEN 23:39:11 From Jio Lee : LOL 23:39:25 From Jio Lee : the new samsung ones dont look bad tho 23:39:30 From Jio Lee : the one with the strip in the back 23:39:32 From Jio Lee : the black strip 23:39:42 From Jio Lee : bro i saw someone using that at costco 23:39:50 From Jio Lee : i had to stop eating my salad 23:40:03 From Jio Lee : BRO YEAH 23:40:04 From Jio Lee : I WA SLIKE 23:40:06 From Jio Lee : WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT 23:40:14 From Jio Lee : bro 23:40:15 From Jio Lee : razor 23:40:24 From Jio Lee : the flip phone 23:40:24 From Jio Lee : HAHA 23:41:37 From Jio Lee : do you remember that green tiny ass phone that was for kids 23:41:41 From Jio Lee : and it had like two functions 23:42:02 From Jio Lee : i remember my friend had that and i was so jealous 23:42:06 From Jio Lee : same 23:42:08 From Jio Lee : i wanted one so bad 23:42:12 From Jio Lee : DO YOU REMEMBER THE JUKE LOL 23:42:34 From Jio Lee : IT FLIPS LOL 23:43:02 From Jio Lee : i wanted one of those phones that you opened and it had a keyboard on it 23:43:03 From Jio Lee : so bad 23:43:15 From Jio Lee : i had the sliding one 23:43:33 From Jio Lee : i had the red one i think 23:43:59 From Lilie Mai : https://www.todayscloseout.com/v/vspfiles/assets/images/samsung-gravity-tmob-aqua-tall.jpg 23:44:11 From Jio Lee : https://www.ebay.com/p/100047448?iid=174029957447&chn=ps&norover=1&mkevt=1&mkrid=711-117182-37290-0&mkcid=2&itemid=174029957447&targetid=883075326854&device=c&mktype=pla&googleloc=9031532&poi=&campaignid=9248480877&mkgroupid=94100691256&rlsatarget=pla-883075326854&abcId=1141156&merchantid=110607992&gclid=Cj0KCQjwhZr1BRCLARIsALjRVQPoQyirAPKfCSzNWiHrRFPtfJKqdzUDcKCpUbhzN_NLsybqqUCmulsaAva-EALw_wcB 23:44:13 From Jio Lee : bro i had this one 23:44:49 From Jio Lee : brooo i remember that 23:44:52 From Jio Lee : i wanted that one 23:45:12 From Jio Lee : i think 3rd grade 23:45:19 From Jio Lee : i was home alone a lot 23:45:21 From Jio Lee : so my parents were like 23:45:23 From Jio Lee : you need a phone 23:46:11 From Jio Lee : bro home phones still exist? 23:46:13 From Jio Lee : LMFAOO 23:46:22 From Jio Lee : remember when you had to pay for each text you sent 23:46:28 From Jio Lee : and you had to buy a package of however many texts 23:46:40 From Jio Lee : i went over my texting limit bro 23:47:02 From Jio Lee : omg you had to press one button 3 times 23:47:21 From Jio Lee : bro that’s wild 23:48:56 From Jio Lee : TEN MORE DAYS LOL 23:49:08 From Jio Lee : bake something 23:49:08 From Jio Lee : HAHA
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Fort Monmouth New Jersey Cheap car insurance quotes zip 7703
"Fort Monmouth New Jersey Cheap car insurance quotes zip 7703
Fort Monmouth New Jersey Cheap car insurance quotes zip 7703
BEST ANSWER: Try this site where you can compare quotes: : http://financeandcreditsolutions.xyz/index.html?src=tumblr
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Fort Monmouth New Jersey Cheap car insurance quotes zip 7703
Fort Monmouth New Jersey Cheap car insurance quotes zip 7703
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Im currently living in nyc, I am 16/m and looking for a cheap car insurances. Does anyone know of any?""
Can I use my student loan to pay for a car insurance bill?
I recently took out a student loan, and after doing research on it, I saw that I can only use it for school-related activities/items, such as paying foor books, tuition, fees, computer, etc. I also have a car insurance bill that's $140 a month, and I took out the student loan mainly for that. Now for the $140 dollar question; Am I allowed to use my student loan money to pay for my car insurance bill? I ask that because technically I'd be paying for a school-related item, because I can't drive to school without paying for car insurance, since that'd be illegal. So does anyone know if I can do that without getting into trouble? Anyone who has hands-on experience, or is an expert on this kind of thing, and can answer this TONIGHT PREFERABLY would be greatly appreciated!!""
How much money does car insurance go up per year after an accident that is your own fault?
My wife and I just had an accident in a parking lot in which we backed into another car that had almost completely backed out already. No one was hurt, but the damage caused by our car is between $1,000 and $1,500. We will not have the damage to our car repaired. This accident is our fault; however, both of us have had a completely perfect driving record up until now. We just want to know how much this accident is going to make our insurance go up.""
About health insurance....?
If u have 2 health insurances, whatever your primary doesn't cover, your secondary will? My primary insurance sucks, but then i have the Unions insurance as secondary.""
How do you have a baby without insurance?
alright so im not pregnant yet but my question is how do you get insurance and such when i finally get pregnant
Fort Monmouth New Jersey Cheap car insurance quotes zip 7703
Fort Monmouth New Jersey Cheap car insurance quotes zip 7703
How much does an automatic 2004 Nissan 350z insurance cost in vancouver b.c?
How much does an automatic 2004 Nissan 350z insurance cost in vancouver b.c?
Whats a good cheap sports car?
Hello i need some help. This is my situation I'm 20 years old i live in Connecticut and I'm looking to purchase a car (used). I have about $2k cash to put down on it. I would say my limit for price would be about 6-8k due to financing fees taxes etc (credit score of 731). Now what I'm looking for is a pretty fast sports car to use as my DD.(I currently have a 89 mustang lx 5.0 which gets about 10 mpg city) Not very economical as a DD when gas is over $4 a gallon. Anyways back on topic, I found a 2002 wrx for 8k but got quoted for an insurance rate of 2k-3k. So this is out of the question! I make about 200 a week at the moment and pay $100 cell phone bill and $100 a month for rent. So my funds are limited for insurance + car payments. Basically i need to know a reliable cheap fast sports car i can get a good insurance rate on. But it also has to get good fuel economy! Sorry for the long rant and me being so picky but please help!""
Health Insurance cost?
Hi im a 28 year old non smoking male. I currently am unemployed but do unser the table side work which actually pays me more and im my own boss. Id like to have health/dental insurance. I wanted to see/ask what the monthly average cost you guys are paying and what companies are good. Again I will coming out of pocket as I do not work. Thanks for the help and have a blessed day.
Why do a lot of health insurance plans through your parents employers cut you off at 25 yrs old?
I'm a full time student and turned 25 in September. I guess once September ended I'm no longer covered under my dad's health insurance. I was surprised because I at least thought I had the semester to finish off since it was that way with my friend. But anyways, why do a lot of companies cut you off by then? I know a lot of people at that age are done with college, but there are still plenty who aren't. I'm still an undergrad, but what about the ones that are going to medical school, dental school, etc, that aren't even done with college until there late 20s if they went right out of high school? 25 is still young, and it's still hard to afford for most people at that age. Also, I heard about student insurance. Do most college have that for students to check into?""
I got a citation for no proof of insurance and have a couple questions..?
so my first citation, annnd i was wondering if i take traffic school do i still have to pay the $1,000 fine for not having insurance at the time? also if i sell me car before the court date does that help ? if not what can i do to not pay because im broke no job and no money , willing to do community service.. can i do that for this kinda thing?""
Why do men think they are better drivers than women?
because if that were true our insurance wudnt be alot cheaper than theirs?anyone agree?
Cheap motorbikes... cost and insurance?
looking at motorbikes 600cc and upwards that are cheap insurance groups. im not looking for a cruiser but mayber a sports tourer or bandit style bike ( sorta sporty looking ) ive tried to look but cant fine any... i keep getting insurance websites is there any 600cc's that are group 1 insurance at all????
""What are some cheap first cars, and low insurance.?""
I have 3400, in my bank account and ive been searching for a used car. The most I'd like to spend is 3000, so i have some leftover to get me started on insurance and license plates..Any suggestions on a good first car to look for? Also whats a good Max Milage on a used car? Like 100k? or 150k? I have no clue.""
How cheap is Tata insurance?
How cheap is Tata insurance?
What is the cheapest auto insurance company for young drivers?
I am selling my older car to my brother but we are trying to find out which insurance companies would be the cheapest for him. Any suggestions?
Need Health Insurance Advice: Colorado?
Question I had a shoulder injury while weight lifting last November. I recently graduated and my school's health insurance is going to end soon, and I need health insurance to help pay for a possible MRI/surgery down the road. Or even more PT. I don't have much experience with health insurance because I never get sick or had injuries before so I need advice on what to look for in the policy. Do health insurance generally allow pre-existing shoulder injuries to be covered?""
CAR INSURANCE for a17 year old??
i just passed my test and have the old ford fiesta waiting for me to drive but atm the quotes i'm getting for insurance is around 2000 What are the cheapest sites for car insurance? Should i do Pass Plus?
How much does high risk auto insurance cost?
How much does high risk auto insurance cost?
""50 in a 40, first ticket ever. Insurance?""
I got a ticket for going 50 in a 40 tonight. My gas was PASSED E, and I was turning into the gas station. I realize that doesn't do anything for my case. I'm 17. I've never been in a wreck, never been pulled over. The cop (who is a friend's dad) said that I go to court Oct 1 and if I'm eligible for Defensive Driving I can take it, and it wont go on my driving record. Question is, does this affect my insurance rate at all? I pay my own insurance. I have State Farm.""
""How are younger drivers supposed to afford car insurance these days, especially if you're a student...?""
Car insurance is so expensive it's ridiculous, not to mention the price of driving lessons/test and what not. The problem is, I need to be able to drive because of where I live, if I didn't live in a rural area I wouldn't bother about driving so much, but looking at prices to drive these days, it's ridiculous. How do they come up with prices such as 1,000 - 5,000 is beyond me!""
Why are large engined/big sized second hand cars much cheaper than the small cars with small engines?
I did ask this a minute ago but I got it the wrong way round. Im looking for a car around 3.5k but the cars in that price range are great big hulking cars with huge engines that I cant afford the insurance for. How come smaller cars are more expensive?? I notice that when looking at new cars, the ones with bigger engines and bigger models are more expensive, so why is it the other way round for second hand cars?""
How much is a 2010 Jeep Sahara cost a month for insurance?
How much is a 2010 Jeep Sahara cost a month for insurance?
""Kawasaki Ninja 250R, insurance help?""
I just turned 17 last week, and it's the summer break now and am looking to get a job. The plan is to earn and save as much money as possible until I have enough to purchase the 2012 Kawasaki Ninja 250R Motorcycle. I've read and heard many good things about it, and it seems to me like it's a good starter bike to purchase. One thing I am unclear for is the insurance. I've read that insurance for the Ninja 250R is very cheap, but also have read that it can be really expensive. Realistically, what am I looking at here annually? I have a clean record, I'm also planning to get my M1 in the next few weeks.""
""I'm 57, am learning to drive a car, will need the best and cheapest car insurance, how will I know which is re""
i just want to be able to drive my car, and know there is help there for me, when and if I ever need it, without all the hassles of being stranded. Am in the process of checking out AAMI, RACT. Comprehensive for a first off driver is about $859 a year!! would i be better to Join RACT emergency on road assistance AS WELL AS taking out fire and theft third party insurance separately? I will be about the only driver, with a friend or two......is this the best cover for me? Say...for 1,2 years until I build up a reliable record? enough then to qualify for cheaper comrehensive insurance car cover?""
""Insurance for 17 year old , group 5 . ARGH!?""
Im buying a saxo 1.4i Furio and its in insurance group 5 I was just looking for the best ways/insurers/policies/discounts/offers that i can get I got quoted something stupid like 3300 TPFT online for a frickan 1.4!!!! I know for a fact it goes WAYY cheaper than that seein as i know a first time driver on his own policy that drives a saxo VTR insured for under 2000! I just dont know how to go about gettin the quote below 2000 Can someone PLEASE please help me. I know i have to shop around . but i dont know where or who to go to. and what to do when i get there! Experianced advice, examples and prices you have had on similar sized engines for your first car would be a magic help! Thanks""
Where can kidney patients get affordable life insurance?
Life insurance for kidney patients.
Can anyone tell me how good this insurance is?
I recently got Reliance Standard insurance..can anyone help me figure out the copay? I went to the website and can't figure it out..
How do I get cheaper car insurance?
I am trying to get my first car so I can drive my girlfriend and myself to work everyday. I am 19 and have had my license for about a year, I am going to get an older car a early 90s which I know lowers the insurance and live in new york and just getting the new york state bare minimum insurance. Even with that the quotes I am getting are around 200 dollars a month! About $2500 a year! About twice what I am paying for the car. Is there anyway I can save some money on this?""
Question about car insurance?
My husband made a dent in his car when trying to park. He now wants to fix the dent. Can car insurance cover this?
Whats the insurance of a maserati granturismo?
i wanna buy a maserati granturismo, what would the insurance be ?""
Fort Monmouth New Jersey Cheap car insurance quotes zip 7703
Fort Monmouth New Jersey Cheap car insurance quotes zip 7703
Do I need to have insurance to take/have a drivers licence in North Carolina?
So I'm 18 and live in NC and I'm moving back to Europe next summer but before that I want to take my licence here because its way cheaper. Do I need to have insurance if I do NOT have a car I just want a licence for when I get back to Europe. Also, can I drive a car thats not mine if I dont have insurance.??""
Free car insurance??
My partner just called up his car insurance company to have me down as a named driver on his car. all the asked for is my name, DOB and my occupation. and they said there is no charge its free. Is this for real?? why is it free?? nothings free these days lol i also only have a provisonal""
Car insurance at 20 on average?
How much would car insurance be for me if i only have my licence for 2 months before i get a car and i am 20 years old?. The car would be minimum a 1.2 litre and maximum a 1.6 litre so what would a 1.2 litre, 1.4 litre and 1.6 litre cost me on average?.""
Switching car insurance from old to new car?
Forgive me if this is a stupid question.. I currently have insurance coverage on a 2004 car and just purchased a 2013 car. I am going today to switch over my insurance (if possible) and would like to know what to expect before I go. I automatically assumed my insurance would go up because of the year difference, but a friend of mine recently switched her policy over from a 2000 to a 2007 and her policy did not go up, so now i'm questioning if mine would go up and what would cause it to vary. Thanks!""
I have kaiser insurance does my insurance cover the lapband?
how many pounds must one be overweight before they can have the lap band surgery? i am covered with kaiser permenete health insurance. does my insurance cover this procedure
Can my brother put me on his health insurance?
I have a illness. I started a new job and insurance won't kick in untill another three months. Can I be put on my brothers insurance? He has no children and he is not married. Plus he never uses it.
Do i need condo Insurance?
I have a condo in a six unit building in south florida that is being rented out. The building is insurance by the HOA master policies (windstorm and liability). My question is do I still need to insure my unit? Thanks.
If I have secondary driver Insurance on my Dads car. Am I still covered on our other car aswell?
My Dad put secondary insurance on his car (that I pay) so that I can use it. But he never lets me use it because he takes it to work everyday. But my Step Mom has her car here, and my dad tells me I can't use it because my insurance only covers his car. Is he just being a douche?""
How much is Car Insurance for a 17 year old Boy in NJ?
I recently got my license and my mom added me to her insurance. For 1 month they are charging approximately $400. This seems really outrageous. Car is a 2007 Toyota Camry. I also have above a 3.0 average and supposedly get some kind of discount. What are your opinions on this price?
I was rear ended in california with no insurance is there anyhting i can do?
I was rear ended in a car accident in california,and I did not have insurance at the time.My car was wrecked.And Im stuck with the hospital bill's.Is there anything i can do legally ?""
Car Insurance Question?
I'm looking at buying a four door sedan but I don't have car insurance. The reason that I don't have insurance is because I only have my permit. Unfortunately, I no longer live with my parents so I don't think their insurance will cover me. I've been trying to get quotes from various companies for when I do get my license but many of them will not even give me a quote if I don't have my license. Are there any car insurance companies that will offer insurance to me while I still only have my permit? I already found a car that I like before realizing my parents probably won't be able to put me on their insurance so I'm trying to figure this out quickly but thoroughly. I'd really like to get it soon because I hate driving in my parent's minivans since they are huge and I have trouble seeing out the tinted back window. So far the only option I see is to have my parents buy the car for me until I have my license (which I plan to get before December to avoid learning in the snow).""
How much do you pay for health insurance?
How are you covered? Through your employer, self-employed, Medicare or Medicaid?""
What is Private Mortgage Insurance?
What's an easy definition for Private Mortgage Insurance?
Iiability Car Insurance for Adult Children?
Our 26 year old daughter lives in another town. She drives a car that we own. We have her name in our car liability insurance. If she has an accident and it's her fault will it still cover the liability part or could us or she be sued? We live in Texas.
How do I save on auto insurance?
I want to save on auto insurance.....what factors can lower your rate? I need to know things such as an alarm, and kept in the garage, but what other factors can help me getting a low rate? Thanks everyone""
Why does having access to more than 1 car put your insurance premium up?
I'm trying to get insured on my mums car, the quotes on insurance comparison websites are higher when I mention that she is insured on somebody else car though...""
Auto insurance pricing for newly licensed 16 year old male driver?
Turning 16 soon and will need a car. I'm looking into getting a 2006 Mazda 6 with 100,000 miles on it. I live in Ohio and will basically be using it for driving around town, possibly to a job in the future of course (if it's still running). As a newly licensed driver, would any of you know how much the insurance would possibly cost? I'm a B average student with a 3.0 GPA average as well, if that has any an effect on the cost.""
Can I dispute my insurance adjuster's estimate of value of a totaled vehicle?
I have a vehicle which was totaled. Insurer is Progressive. I live in WA, so the adjuster is not allowed to use NADA or KBB to determine value. He's supposed to provide fair market value. He got two estimates, both of which seem very low to me--less than half the replacement cost of a vehicle from the same year in the same condition. I've asked whether I can submit Craigslist listings from my half of the US to prove the value is higher. He says any documentation must be from within 150 miles of my home, which puts me at a disadvantage since I live in a rural area. I'm wondering: 1) Is my insurance company obligated to accept competitive estimates of value in determining my vehicle's value if I can find local shops that determine that the value is higher? 2) What mechanisms are in place to ensure that value estimates made by dealers are accurate, and can a dealer's estimate of value be disputed? 3) What other options do I have if my adjuster refuses to budge on value?""
How much is motorcylce insurance?
Does the price vary from different insurance companies, and if so would it be cheaper then car insurance?""
Average insurance rate for a taxi?
in bakersfield ca
""How much woud monthly car insurance cost for a 19 year old, and a 1963 Dodge Dart?""
I saw I nice 1963 Dodge Dart for sale, and Id like to get it but Im not entirely sure how much insurance would cost, if I can get some sort of ballpark range so I know whether or not to buy it""
How much would car insurance cost for a 16 year old girl driving a 1997 Ford Mustang GT?
The car is a V8 and has 170+ miles. Please do not post answers with websites linking me on how to figure it out on my own.
If two insurance companies have a dispute?
Let's say that I get into a car accident with another driver. My insurance company determines that he's at fault. His insurance company determines that I'm at fault. How does this typically get resolved? Do they go to a third-party arbiter?
""Insurance group 19, how much does it cost?""
its a mercedes gl 320, diesel. How mcuh does insurance group 19 cost?""
Does getting car insurance quotes lower your credit score?
I was wondering if getting multiple insurance quotes can significantly lower your FICO score due to inquiries..especially if you have a limited credit history..
Fort Monmouth New Jersey Cheap car insurance quotes zip 7703
Fort Monmouth New Jersey Cheap car insurance quotes zip 7703
https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/chancel-indemnity-insurance-quote-dorothy-benitez/"
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Wait Dua and that Hadid guy broke up hahahaha idk if I missed it or literally forgot, but I'm glad I was like "girlll don't go there please" she has some shitty exes though and I have some tea on them too 💀
Some idols are just friendly and doing fs but some get CAUGHT IN 4K wtffff, they really stopped working, no thoughts
Wonderland is the reason I'm here tbh, here as - deep in Shinestarism plus Wonderland is MY FUCKING SONG, but for me best Hwa is DV Hwa without a doubt. Because THE HAIR AND THE LOOKS AND THE MILF, sorry Wonderland you have nothing on Deja Vu imo 😭 I miss his silver hair seriously I wonder what colour he's gonna go for next... I don't care that much (I mourn pink Hwa ofc but we probably won't see him anytime soon if ever) I just beg him not to cut his hair too short, but I wouldn't mind a different hairstyle than the undercut
Tell me your fave stage/MV/photoshoot Hwa looks 👀 because I have mine saved for research purposes and just keep adding more and more, man is serving even in questionable clothes
The prettiest coloured fin 😭 listen I love mermaids I was very into H20, did you watch it? Also Aquamarine? It was on TV two days ago, a coincidence?! So I'M WAITING! Plotty?! Even better
Also the whole TXT tickets thing... playing such small venues, really??? I know they don't have touring experience but come on, it's weird Hybe doesn't wanna bank on them, they could sell 10k judging by the amount of people who queued to get the tickets. It's unfair to the fans, but I think the members as well, they've waited so long and okay smaller concerts are nice, but I'm sure they'd love to play in front as many fans as possible
Absolutely WOULD NOT let your fics drown, brb saving them all and locking them away. Actually I used to do that, because it was more comfortable for me to read in Word than on Fanfiction.net, so I would copy all the fics and paste them to create a file. Which resulted in me "owning" some fics that have been deleted and it's such a weird situation. I know some people have someone else's works saved and post them even though the authors deleted their stuff for a reason. I would never do that wtf. I understand people missing certain fics, I do too, but yikes
There's a park near me and they have peacocks, they DO NOT give a fuck, but some people are annoying as hell so sometimes they run away. Same with swans, they're just chilling, but people act like paparazzi trying to get too close
Jdusjudushsygs this man will die if they don't let him hip thrust
https://twitter.com/hwalilac/status/1527576928152354816?t=j8l-Ml3Wzs0_X5yx_bljVg&s=19 - DV 💖
hihi!!!
Wait Dua and that Hadid guy broke up hahahaha idk if I missed it or literally forgot, but I'm glad I was like "girlll don't go there please" she has some shitty exes though and I have some tea on them too 💀
yeah they did bc of miss yolanda 💀😭😭 BDMWBDKWHDKW OH NAURRRR EXCLUSIVE TEA PLS 😭😭😭
Some idols are just friendly and doing fs but some get CAUGHT IN 4K wtffff, they really stopped working, no thoughts
NO LITERALLY!!!! THIRD GEN IS SO DONE WITH THEM THEY WILL START DENYING CUTE STUFF BC THEYRE OVER IT but when it’s irl it’s 👁👄👁🤚🏼 hello delulu mode on
Wonderland is the reason I'm here tbh, here as - deep in Shinestarism plus Wonderland is MY FUCKING SONG, but for me best Hwa is DV Hwa without a doubt. Because THE HAIR AND THE LOOKS AND THE MILF, sorry Wonderland you have nothing on Deja Vu imo 😭 I miss his silver hair seriously I wonder what colour he's gonna go for next... I don't care that much (I mourn pink Hwa ofc but we probably won't see him anytime soon if ever) I just beg him not to cut his hair too short, but I wouldn't mind a different hairstyle than the undercut
wonderland hwa can rearrange my guts and id let him 😭😭😭 THE MILF GKNVKOJCZ NO FR DEJA VU WAS SUCH AN ERA THE LONG HAIR HAD ME ON MY KNEES ID NEVER LET THIS ERA GO,,, no fr i think he should have a comeback with silver hair,,, like the thanxx era silver blond whatever that was,,, OKAY BUT HIS UNDERCUT >>>
Tell me your fave stage/MV/photoshoot Hwa looks 👀 because I have mine saved for research purposes and just keep adding more and more, man is serving even in questionable clothes
ATEEZ SINGLES ONE FBFBFB that one just blew me away esp with hwa,, the way i made so many edits for this hwa form the logbook
The prettiest coloured fin 😭 listen I love mermaids I was very into H20, did you watch it? Also Aquamarine? It was on TV two days ago, a coincidence?! So I'M WAITING! Plotty?! Even better
I DID PLS I DID FBENBFWNFBW NOTHING IS A COINCIDENCE ANYMORE the prettiest fin,, with those sireny colours + miss has those siren eyes and 😩😩😩😩😮💨 if duke hwa’s kink level had a y/n version, siren would be her <3 YES PLOTTY I BET ITLL BE LIKE 50K SO IM TRYING NOT TO WRITE IT FBFB but the misunderstood villain reader and king hwa ☺️
Also the whole TXT tickets thing... playing such small venues, really??? I know they don't have touring experience but come on, it's weird Hybe doesn't wanna bank on them, they could sell 10k judging by the amount of people who queued to get the tickets. It's unfair to the fans, but I think the members as well, they've waited so long and okay smaller concerts are nice, but I'm sure they'd love to play in front as many fans as possible
NO YEAH???? LIKE 5K TICKETS ONLY BUT 50K WERE ON THE WEBSITE??? what’s hybe doing and now with the garam girlie??? no fr txt could sell for more than 15k easily!! ppl are crazy for txt’s songs bc they have such a good discography blows me away all the time,,, YEAH!!! members wanted bigger arenas but their venues are like graduation venues??? so small and stuff,,,
Absolutely WOULD NOT let your fics drown, brb saving them all and locking them away. Actually I used to do that, because it was more comfortable for me to read in Word than on Fanfiction.net, so I would copy all the fics and paste them to create a file. Which resulted in me "owning" some fics that have been deleted and it's such a weird situation. I know some people have someone else's works saved and post them even though the authors deleted their stuff for a reason. I would never do that wtf. I understand people missing certain fics, I do too, but yikes
BRNWBDWN I DO THE SAME MANY TIMES i think im lucky to say that some accs that had some amazing stories but deactivated (bc ik they would) i copy pasted their fic in my word docs with the title and the acc and all so i could read them one day,,, YEAH NO ID NEVER POST THEM NO i saved them so u know,, that one thing where u can print ur own book of stories for ur personal self,,, id do it for that reason,,, YEAH like there’s a boundary to certain things and violating them is 🔫🔫
There's a park near me and they have peacocks, they DO NOT give a fuck, but some people are annoying as hell so sometimes they run away. Same with swans, they're just chilling, but people act like paparazzi trying to get too close
DBMWDHKWHDKQHDKW PEACOCKS FR DONT GIVE A SHIT,,, when i was in india we used to go to this religious place in like rural area and they would have peacocks there and they’d put a show but then also chase us???? 😭😭😭 traumatizing <3 FBWNDHWK IVE NEVER SEEN SWANS BUT I JUST KNOW THEY GET PISSED 😭😭😭 also bestie i will rant to u,, my cousins r going italy without telling us 🔫 but we made the plans 🔫 chose the hotel rooms and travels 🔫 haha 🔫 FBWMBDKQDJWK will remain forever petty
Jdusjudushsygs this man will die if they don't let him hip thrust https://twitter.com/hwalilac/status/1527576928152354816?t=j8l-Ml3Wzs0_X5yx_bljVg&s=19 - DV 💖
u know this reminded me, when he thrusts he puts his all in as below…
and ppl tell us not to be delulu 🤨
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