#like— hundreds

[whump-queen]

you know what I love?

a fucking maintenance beating.

whumpee didn’t do anything wrong, at least, not that they can remember. but tracing back in their memories is hard when they’re constantly getting kicked into the ground.

but this isn’t a punishment. they’ve been perfectly well behaved, as a matter of fact.

no, this beating isn’t corrective. it’s preventative.

whumper just does it to keep them in line.

[o3o-lapd-o3o]

after six hundred strike

*odysseus and poseidon are both still on the rocks in the middle of the sea*

odysseus: ok, let's just agree to both say we're sorry

odysseus: on the count of three

odysseus: one..two..three

poseidon:

odysseus:

odysseus: see, now i'm just disappointed in the both of us

[elucubrare]

i firmly hold that it's my duty as a reader to believe it when an author tells me at the beginning of the series that the dragons are gone forever and never coming back. but god it's a struggle sometimes.

[lalalychee]

i'm so, so excited to share this painting with you. i have officially been making art for 20 years, and i thought it would be fun to repaint the first digital work i ever made.

i have wanted to give up art so many times over the years. i'm tremendously proud of myself for sticking with it and improving as much as i have. i hope you're proud of me too! please be sure to zoom in to see all those details i worked so hard on (especially the rhinestones!!). thank you for being with me during my art journey. 20 years, 20 more 🖤

[alaraxia]

needless to say the vibes were in shambles

[raddestrose]

Shoutout to Shen Yuan the only man who actually read porn for the plot

[justwannabecat]

“Yeah, see, the Anti-Ecto Acts are even more troubling than ‘inciting war with the Realm of the Dead and all its gods’ level.” Phantom began. “It affects the living, even outside of that.”

Constantine huffed, but didn’t disagree. Bruce could only guess what he was thinking.

“At least, from what Clockwork taught me,” Phantom continued, and that made Constantine snap to attention, “ectoplasm is just kind of… There. Floating around in the background, but at such a low level that it doesn’t usually manifest. But it’s still there, and it functions kind of like radiation: just being around it might cause you to develop liminality.”

“Liminality?” Bruce asked. Phantom shrugged.

“Any side effects you would notice are only caused by high levels of exposure, nothing like this low-level radiation. But, well… Ectoplasm is both attracted to emotions and attracted by emotions. And ectoplasm heightens emotions, too. The fact that the human race has been alive so long, evolved to feel more complex emotions, it’s because the ectoplasm bonded enough with humanity to allow that. Humans achieved sentience because they could feel enough to determine they existed. Without ectoplasm, slowly those emotions will fade. And…” Phantom hesitated.

“…I can’t say that humanity will become nonsentient once again, not for sure. But I can say that you will slowly, generation by generation, lose the feelings you have now.”

[2129888]

committing yaoi crimes

[lazylittledragon]

the only thing scarier than vampire lords/mind flayers/death cults is meeting the in-laws

[umblrspectrum]

i hate perspective. happy new years also

[willgrahamscock]

you will not make it to heaven you blasphemous freak of nature

I sin because I do not want to go where you cannot follow

[blondie-drawings]

Good lord this tomb is full of shitposts 😳😳 pt 1/pt 2

[curly-cottage-girl]

“Veggietales is Christian propaganda” veggietales taught me that I am special and loved and I should stand up for what is right and also not to trust the IRS

[starcurtain]

Teyvat's "Most Down Bad" Award Goes to Alhaitham for a Second Year Running

Seeing everyone making fun of Alhaitham for his "stalkerish" tendencies in this event is funny, because I feel like a lot of people missed that "Be literally everywhere Kaveh is" has been Alhaitham's MO from the day Kaveh appeared in the game.

From only grabbing his house keys after Kaveh returned from the desert (he couldn't have had both sets of keys at the end of the Archon Quest unless he went home and got Kaveh's copy) to ditching conversations to get back to his house only after Kaveh came home, to showing up without any warning or explanation in Kaveh's hangout with some ridiculous excuse about hearing his voice through noise-cancelling headphones... Refusing to offer any help in the Temple of Silence story quest other than staying in the library with Kaveh...

Since when does Alhaitham willingly cover anyone else's duties?

But this trend of "Be everywhere Kaveh is" didn't start when they were adults. It was already in place when they were still Akademiya students--and it's a trend that didn't end even when they had their fight.

Even when they weren't speaking, Alhaitham dogged Kaveh's every step through published responses to Kaveh's research articles in academic journals. He insisted on keeping a line of communication between himself and Kaveh open, even if the only way to do that was through very public ideological clashes. Pulling Kaveh's pigtails to get his attention lolol. It's implied that, for at least the few years between their fight and Kaveh moving in, this was the only communication between them--Alhaitham's refusal to allow their connection to entirely fade away. (And the fact that this is revealed in Kaveh's character stories--through his precious journal that records the moments of his life that had the most impact on him--shows just how deeply he values the fact that Alhaitham didn't give up.)

Another relevant side note: Alhaitham never asked Kaveh to give up his half of their house. Knowing half of it belonged to Kaveh, knowing that Kaveh may one day want to reclaim his part of it, knowing that it was listed as theirs, Alhaitham moved into the house and made zero effort to change its ownership. He was completely fine with living in "his and Kaveh's house." The stories suggest it was only months later (or even longer) that Kaveh even noticed he had the house, and he transferred away ownership of his portion without Alhaitham ever asking him (or even seemingly wanting him) to do so.

Please, let that sink in. Alhaitham actively left his grandmother's (presumably comfortable) house to move into "his and Kaveh's house," with no apparent explanation for why, and after doing so, he made no attempt to change that "his and Kaveh's" label. He moved into the house with no promise that Kaveh wouldn't show up on the doorstep the very next day and move in too. It almost feels like another deliberate provocation--I've moved into our house, are you going to come stop me? LBR, if Alhaitham had had his way, Kaveh would have been living there with him from Day 1...

There's also the fact that Kaveh literally can't write on a single message board anywhere in the entire nation of Sumeru without Alhaitham hunting his messages down and responding to them (which absolutely no one else does, by the way).

"NUH-UH!" "UH-HUH." "NUH-UH!"

Alhaitham's own character stories tell us explicitly that one of Alhaitham's defining character traits is "He is never where you need him to be," yet somehow...

Shot, and chaser:

Any time Kaveh is in the slightest bit of need or danger or just wants Alhaitham near, Alhaitham is "coincidentally" exactly where Kaveh needs him to be, whenever Kaveh needs him to be there.

Alhaitham didn't just "happen" to run into Kaveh in Port Ormos, an entirely different city from where he was supposed to be working. He didn't just "happen" to read the same terrible book as Kaveh when we know he otherwise would not waste a moment of his time on poorly-written literature...

He didn't just "happen" to appear when Kaveh was upset and needed a distraction in the House of Daena during Kaveh's hangout. He didn't just "happen" to be sitting around waiting when Kaveh needed answers after the Archon Quest. He didn't just "happen" to find Kaveh's academic publications and every single message board posting and respond to them at length and in public.

Which is exactly what Kaveh's mother told Kaveh he needed.

What level of down bad is "Abusing your powers as an Akademiya employee to keep tabs on your crush's library loans"? Just asking for a friend.

The only person for whom Alhaitham just "happens" to be available is Kaveh, over and over and over again--because he is very deliberately making himself a constant presence in Kaveh's life.

(Like, out of all things, I think people really underestimate the devs deliberately paralleling the romantic relationship between Kaveh's mother and father with Kaveh and Alhaitham's relationship. If you want to point to one thing that says "These two characters are intentionally queer-coded," it doesn't get any more obvious than this.)

Alhaitham, are you not embarrassed to be this transparent??? 🫣

[lara-cairncross]

❤️🔄🧡🔄💙🔄💜

just in case it’s not obvious who switched with who:

Leo —> Tinker talent (Donnie)

Donnie —> Animal talent (Raph)

Raph —> Light talent (Mikey)

Mikey —> Fast-flying talent (Leo)

[the-holy-ghosted]

black sails is absolutely fucking insane for making you think that flint and miranda were cheating with each other on thomas hamilton only for it to be revealed that they were, actually, polyamorous and Everything flint did was in his gay lover's name and honor and what he wanted. in fucking 2014