#like yeah i played through...most of the more modern games but i still feel like theres more to see you know???

[elegyofthemoon]

I'm curious, what would your ideal FE be?

And do you have any particular FE concepts in mind?

HM i feel like that's such a toughy since I'm not super nitpicky about what I like/dislike 😅 plus I don't feel like I've really experienced everything FE has to offer to really pinpoint potential concepts/ways to go in the way that maybe some other more experienced folks do asldkfjh

BUT what I can say based on the ones I have played, I could care less about the story itself. I guess so long as the characters can reel me in (which is. Fairly easy. You don't have to even be well written you just need to be entertaining somehow lolol), then I seem to be generally okay? BUT BONUS! If you can integrate some fun worldbuilding too! that's chill. I've certainly had a lot of fun getting to talk to NPCs and learning tidbits of lore that way or like. even reading books in 3h for example. Idk I guess I just liked the exploring aspects of learning lore (which. checks out as well bc that's just generally the kinds of games I like anyhow)

...Not super specific sorry aklsdfja I could say this about really, any story, but meh

[opennwindows]

If you can, could I request BEN Drowned fluff / smut headcanons like about himself, with his headcanon age, hobbies, facts, what he is into or would like & want in a relationship, and what he would be like with a gamer girlfriend/ s/o?

If ya taking requests rn still?✨😇😊💖

Ben Drowned general + NSFW hcs

A/N: yes!! absolutely. i love getting to talk about how the pastas do their pastaing in my mind. i have so many headcanons for everyone that im excited to share!! also sorry i forgot to include the gamer gf part but i don't think it would change a lot of what i wrote!!

btw sorry for fucking dying i have been busy 😭😭 but no one worry i will still continue to work on requests!! if anyone has any marble hornets stuff they wanna request i will zoom you to the front of the queue so fucking quick. anyways enough of me yapping.

cw: 18+ nsfw, toxic relationships, crying kink,

GENERAL

ben is mentally and physically 22, but he can be quite emotionally immature at times. when he died he never stopped growing and maturing, his soul was just stuck in limbo. think like the worst waiting room ever.

he's surprisingly tall, standing at about 5'9. he's lanky but not bone thin. could easily get pretty far in a fight without his ghost powers.

the link costume only appears when he’s in his ghost form. so for example, when he’s messing with someone on their computer he’ll appear as the canon BEN we��re most familiar with. when he’s just chilling in his physical body, he mostly wears beat up hoodies and sweatpants.

contrary to popular belief, ben's not the hardcore gamer everyone thinks he is. sure, he'll play some overwatch or whatever when he's bored but he honestly just prefers to watch tv and browse the internet. understandably REFUSES to play any zelda games. if you were trapped in a video game for decades would you ever wanna touch it again? exactly.

ben loves to draw little comics and troll (see: horrifically traumatize) people online. god forbid you get into twitter beef with this man because he will crawl through your monitor at 3am and leave you with a crippling fear of technology. dude thinks it's absolutely hilarious. a true knee slapper.

lowkey has a sugar addiction. will slam down 4 cans of pepsi in one sitting. he's very lucky that he's basically a ghost because the kidney stones would be plentiful.

ROMANTIC

you know that guy with the blown out speakers in his car, lives off of energy drinks and burnt blue razz ice elfbars, swears aphex twin is the modern mozart and works on the grill at your local wendy’s? yeah thats ben. or at least would be him if he was still human.

“why would you need a chair, my lap is literally right here babe.”

would absolutely wear your skin if given the opportunity. not in a weird way. he’s just EXTREMELY touchy.

he needs someone who is significantly more organized and motivated than him. he can go almost a week without showering and it should honestly be considered biological warfare when he tries to smother you with affection during these episodes.

after awhile of you guys dating he LOVES the idea of y’all showering together. he has a fear of water and while showers aren’t too much of a trigger, your presence helps ease his anxiety.

favorite pet names: bro, dude, dawg, babe, bitch (non derogatory)

not really a romantic but he tries his best. a perfect date for him is just getting some takeout, watching youtube, talking about stupid shit and play fighting. if you want something more traditional or extravagant then he’ll oblige to make you happy but those types of dates make him feel quite suffocated and nervous. try to save those for special occasions.

now let’s talk about his problems because just like the other creeps he is ANGSTY.

he’s probably the most emotionally stable and healthiest of the group but he definitely still has his toxic traits, after all this man is a ghost that mentally tortures and kills his victims through manipulation.

ben would never ever get physical with his partner no matter how enraged he is but he absolutely is the type to do some mental damage when he gets carried away. ben drowned? more like ben gaslighted.

the type to say some shit that would keep you up for years and then kiss you the next morning like the argument never happened. he finds it easier to ignore problems than to actively talk and fix them. you’re gonna have to teach him some important communication skills or else you’ll grow to resent him after all the bottled up rage.

a bit too brutally honest and blunt for his own good so if you have thin skin the relationship would fall apart pretty quickly. he wants someone who can drag him twice as hard as he dragged you. bonus points if your insults are consistently funny as hell.

please watch anime with him and discuss it. he would propose on the spot, especially if you play with his hair.

pro player tip: if you want him to clean his disgusting room, help him and make it fun! he just needs a little push and motivation at times. and being around you makes him want to get his shit together.

big fan of late night make-out sessions. i’m talking like 45 minutes straight of just slobbering on each other’s faces with tongues down throats. if you don’t want his hands running over every inch of your body then you’ll probably have to chain him to the wall.

NSFW

okay. so he’s a little inexperienced with his hands. he’s just a slow learner. be vocal with him about what you like!!

ben's about 7inches and slightly skinnier than average but he will have you seeing stars in record time. the dick game is no joke. he tends to go fast and deep most times.

i can see him being a switch in the idgaf-as-long-as-i’m-fucking way. dude will go with the flow and will try mostly anything.

definitely one of the least aggressive pastas during sex. he has sadistic tendencies but he’s more of a edge/overstimulate you until you cry versus a beat the shit out of you and rip hair out of your scalp type. he’s pretty vanilla given his occupation.

despite his love of roasting the fuck out of you on a daily basis, the only words that come out of this man’s mouth is heavenly praise. he looks at you like you’re the most gorgeous being on the planet and he’ll let you know it.

he loves to whisper praises into your ear while you ride him.

he's more of a receiver than a giver when it comes to oral. he'll absolutely spend hours between your legs if given the chance but nothing beats the sight of you on your knees and teary eyed with his length in your mouth.

he can be a bit of a head pusher but just let him face-fuck you every now and then, hearing his loud moans will be worth it.

did i mention how much of a crying kink this man has? you guys could be on round three and if he stares at your teary eyed fucked-out face for longer than 10 seconds he'll immediately get hard again. you'll have to beg him to give your poor body a break.

he's also into choking but only if he's the one doing it. if you try to restrict his breathing he'll panic and the mood would get ruined.

[dr-spectre]

So.... This game is 2 years old now huh?

Honestly... I don't think i have a TON to say about this game. It's just a great ass fucking video game that has given me a lot of fun and great memories!

This game came out during my final year of school, which is kinda funny considering that Splatoon 3 acts like a "finale" to a trilogy. It's interesting how those kinds of things work out eh? Splatoon 2 came out at the start of my secondary education, and Splatoon 3 came out at the tail end of my final year.

I remember thinking before the game came out, "why do we need a Splatoon 3? This is pointless, it's just more Splatoon 2." And then my mind was quickly changed once i got to play the Splatfest test fire and the actual game itself.....

I completed ROTM in such a short amount of time and i documented my reactions to my friends. Although i was spoiled in that Deep Cut had boss fights and Mr. Grizz was the final boss, ROTM still gave me a giant smile to my face all the way through. It was so fun, so charming and just a really good single player experience.

One of the things that i LOVE about Splatoon 3 is the vibe. I just love the location of Splatsville, i love the aesthetics, the lighting, the model improvements from Splatoon 2, the music, it's my favourite art style/aesthetic out of any of the Splatoon games by far. It just feels so polished, i don't know how to exactly describe it.

Also the fact that this game won best multiplayer game of 2022 over CALL OF DUTY! OVERWATCH 2 AND MULTIVERSUS MAKES ME SO GIDDY AND HAPPY!

PEOPLE GOT MAD ABOUT THIS AND THAT MAKES ME WANNA EVIL LAUGH! All of those fucking depressed and sad Call of Duty players who whine and complain about how "wahh modern gaming sucks!! There's no good games anymore wahhh!! It's all microtransactions wahhh!!" BITCH! SPLATOON 3 IS LITERALLY THE GAME YOU'VE BEEN ASKING FOR!! Yet you won't play it because it's on Nintendo huh? Yeah... You're a fucking PUSSY!! YOU'RE WEAK!! You're SCARED to be seen as less of a manly man!! You only wanna play games with oily dirty buff men.... Yet you call others who play games like Splatoon gay? Hmm..... Sounds like you're a wittle insecureeeeee!!!!

Have fun rotting in microtransaction hell you LOSERS!! GAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Anyways.... uh.... sorry....

I also fucking love Deep Cut too. I thought i wasn't gonna like these guys and i remember thinking when i first saw them "oh... okayyyy..."

But now? I love these bastards.

I love their dynamic and how they are bandits but they actually wanna help the people back in Splatsville. That is such a cool and unique take to have for Idol characters. The Squid Sisters are very cutesy and so are Off the Hook, but Deep Cut aren't. They are loud, messy, chaotic, in your face, rude, etc. They are about contrast and the character designers did a phenomenal job at conveying that theme via their backgrounds and looks.

Another thing that i love about Splatoon 3 is that it also acts as a celebration of things that have come before, Inkopolis Plaza and Square return as hubs, old colour combos from previous games act as loading screens, most of the music returns in the jukebox, it rewards long time fans for sticking around and for a long running franchise IT'S SUPER IMPORTANT to have that stuff!!!

Seeing the improvements in the model quality from Splatoon 1 to 3 genuinely makes me kinda emotional, it shows how far we've come in just a little under 10 years...

It really homes in on the point that... These characters, have grown up with us.... The Squid Sisters are about to reach their mid 20s, Pearl is nearly 30 fucking years old!!!

And the last thing i wanna bring up before i talk about the Grand Fest...

...Is Side Order.

This fucking DLC... My god... Being able to experience it by myself and just enjoy the stuff i was seeing, being able to SCREAM AND CRY AS MUCH I WANT WAS SO IMPORTANT TO ME DUDE!

When i got to the 10th floor in the tutorial and i saw Marina Agitando staring me down.... I did the loudest gasp a human could possibly do and my jaw was hung to the floor for a solid MINUTE!

Marina's first fucking dev diary made me cry and scream, THAT IS NOT A JOKE!!!! THESE CHARACTERS ARE THAT IMPORTANT TO ME!

And the final boss.... Made me cry, it broke me down, i was singing along to Ebb and Flow as best as i could, it felt like i was brought back to 2018, being in my room, listening to that song on repeat... I feel like a kid again....

I love this song... i love it so much... Like it's not the most hype finale song ever, but, the emotion behind it, the build up from Splatoon 2... The power this song has in it's meaning... It's some good shit man...

So yeah! I love Splatoon 3!!! It's my favourite game out of the series and anyone who is gonna jump into this game now is gonna have a LOT to chew on.

And... It's both sweet and sad that we're at the end. This is it... The moment we've been waiting for. The final Splatfest to end them all. The event 9 years in the making.

The Grand Festival...

I am extremely excited and so FUCKING NERVOUS for this Splatfest!!!! I know i am going to cry and be so overwhelmed with joy. Seeing the Squid Sisters and Off the Hook perform their old songs again after all of these years is gonna make me sob so loudly it's not even funny.

These characters genuinely mean the world to me and it's gonna be so fucking hard for me to watch their final major appearance and say goodbye. Cause after this, we don't know what's gonna happen. I know they will come back, they have to but... In what capacity? That's what I'm scared about...

So yeah, let's savior this moment when it eventually arrives, take all the time you need to be engulfed in the Grand Fest.

Thank you Splatoon 3, you have given me so much.... It's not time to say goodbye just yet but, i wanna watch you as you walk into the sunset with your head held high....

[oh-meretseger]

part 4 - Tease

attack on titan modern college au // Jean Kirstein x fem!reader

summary: the sexual frustration between you gets to its peak when your first kiss happens (🥹), starting a game of brutal teasing on both sides

notes: 18+! although not so much of a smut (some public touching and groping, making out hehe), mainly fluff, some cute moments before posting some disgustingly dirty smut in the next chapter lmao

word count: 4,6k

"Sasha, stop calling me pookie bear or I'm going ballistic" Jean calmly blinked in her direction after setting the empty box of pad thai down. Sasha was already on her third portion, mercilessly stuffing her face full like she's been starving for a week.

"But you're my pookie bear, what do you mean?" Sasha's jaw stopped chewing, stunned for a moment by hearing such astonishing nonsense, as she stared back at Jean. She notoriously got addicted to every single silly nickname she made up for her friends, and used it uncontrollably until she discovered a new one.

Jean let out an exhausted sigh, but still leaned back on his bed with a chuckle as he shook his head.

"And what about me?" Connie complained loudly from the other bed with a mouth full of noodles. None of the three were giving any more fucks about the movie playing on Connie's notebook in the background.

"You're my pookie pie"

"Yeah, I like pie" Connie shrugged, giving his blessing as Sasha nodded diligently.

"I know"

"Yeah, but I'm not a bear, so how does that work?" Jean huffed, holding back a smile at how Sasha's expression instantly turned outraged, just like he guessed.

"You are!" Sasha snapped at him and Jean laughed out loud. "You're a big ass hairy animal, but still cute and huggable"

"Ah right, thanks" Jean's ironic tone did not faze her in the slightest.

"I'm deeply sorry bro, but I wouldn't say you're cute, at all" Connie's eyes were back on the movie, although his attention was fully on the brilliant, highly knowledgeable conversation in the background.

"Y/N thinks you are" Sasha shrugged carelessly while ruthlessly devouring her last bites of dinner, and Jean's heart started pounding in his chest all of a sudden.

He cleared his throat to avoid choking on his own saliva, and tried to reply just as casually as Sasha spit out this small little information.

"What do you mean?" Jean couldn't believe how flustered he became by simply hearing your name. He didn't like it. The hell is his heart beating so fast for?

"She has the biggest crush on you, don't tell me you didn't notice" Sasha giggled to herself at Jean's honest, dumb expression. She found you two idiots adorable, pretending you didn't absolutely have the hots for each other.

"The hell are you on? They're at each other's throats all the fucking time" Connie turned his head at hearing such nonsensical gibberish.

"I truly feel sorry for you men sometimes" Sasha blinked at two of the most imbecile faces she's ever seen. "Are you really that slow?! Why in tarnation do you think I left you two alone?"

Jean felt heat spread through his body as images of you popped up in his memory, your warm body against his, teeth sunk into his skin...

"They fucked?!" Connie yelled out in shock and Jean couldn't help cracking up at how serious he sounded.

"Not YET" Sasha looked at Connie with a nod of true wisdom as Jean huffed in disapproval. Although deep inside, a feeling of excitement started to make him tingle.

"Shut your silly mouth, Sasha" Jean snapped at her, holding back a smile trying to climb up on his face all the way from his heart. "You've been acting a fool since you started latching onto that canteen guy"

"My brother in Christ, you're in denial" Sasha gave up. She already knew you were bound to be together anyway. "And I've always been silly, Niccolo just brings out the best in me"

"I love that guy, he makes the best risottos" Connie agreed in his own way, still pretending to watch the movie.

"He cooks me his secret special meals" she added, her eyes literally sparkling with pure bliss as she said those words, and Jean rolled his eyes. "I'm bringing him to your party, Consuelo"

"That's literally not my name" Connie stated, not even moving his eyes from the screen in front of him.

"Okay, Conrad"

"I'm texting Marco to come" Jean grabbed his phone, verbalizing his actions as both Sasha and Connie turned their head in excitement.

"Yesss, I miss Marco!"

You were rather anxious about this party. Connie's parents lived close to the campus, and the group of people Connie invited over to their house sounded fun when Sasha listed them all to you in detail. But still, there was something unnerving about a night of careless fun, coming out of your little shell and letting yourself go in front of such new people, in front of Jean.

"C'mon, we're gonna have an amazing time!" Sasha encouraged you after seeing a small anxious frown form on your face.

"I know, it's always an amazing time with you guys" you smiled, your heart pounding hard at the thought of seeing Jean at the party. "But what should I wear?"

"POOKIE, let me help you with that" Sasha jumped up from your bed and shot straight to your closet, as you watched her with an entertained grin.

You walked down the hallway on the way to your afternoon class, Friday leaving a freeing bliss in your chest as you listened to your playlist. The always busy corridor was now almost empty, everyone having left the stress of weekdays behind to finally enjoy their free time. Anxiety turned into a small glimpse of excitement in your stomach the past few days, and you couldn't wait for it to be tomorrow night.

Your headphones suddenly flying off of your head jerked you out of being in your own thoughts, and before you could even react, a strong hand grabbed your wrist, pulling you into a narrow passageway with an overwhelming force.

Your body crashed into a much larger frame, and a familiar sense of warmth flowed through you as Jean's smell hit your nose before you could even get a look at your kidnapper.

"Hey! Give it back!" your hand shot towards his immediately, but of course with one movement of his arm your headphones were instantly removed far from your reach, as he held it up above his head. A grin grew on his face as he looked down at you, his other hand still squeezing your wrist, and once again, you felt your cheeks get warm under his intense stare. That stupid cocky grin of his...

"D'you think I should?" Jean's voice was smooth and low, enough to make your mind go hazy. You couldn't believe how fast it all could get too much. His intoxicating scent, the warmth of his body as he towered over you, his fingers' touch on your skin, his voice and beautiful hazel eyes melting you into a puddle...

You felt weak.

"Can you stop doing that? My arm is getting all bruised up from you pulling on it" you sneered up at him, not even trying to get further away as your bodies pressed into each other. Jean's eyes slipped down to your plump lips as you mockingly smirked. "And kidnapping me"

"Kidnapping you? You could definitely not move your little hands around like that, if I were to kidnap you" Jean's raised hand inched lower and lower to slowly put your headphones around your neck as your eyes desperately pierced into his. You felt yourself melt into him, his look deliberately making you go soft and mindless, as his delicious-looking lips were so dangerously close to you...

As Jean's other hand became free, it slid down on the sleeve of your hoodie to grab your other wrist. The hard grip of his hands restraining yours was enough to make you soaking wet.

And that strangely made your confidence bounce right back.

"Why are you stalking me anyway?" you stared into his eyes with a self-assured smile slightly curving your lips.

Jean felt blood rush right to his crotch at the devilish sparkle in your eyes, almost visibly turning dark as you looked up at him. What a naughty girl.

Although weakness was palpable in the air between both of you. You both knew you would fold the moment your hips pressed into each other just a tad bit more.

Jean's hands gripping your wrists moved them behind your back with a swift motion.

"Don't think so highly of yourself, Miss Important" he smiled and you felt yourself blushing again as his arms pulled your body more into his, cuffing your hands behind you. Being controlled by Jean's big arms felt... Heavenly. "You want me to stalk you, don't you?"

"Unlike yourself, I'm not a pervert, dumbass" you let the magic word slip from between your lips, and warmth filled your chest as Jean cracked up. You felt like you could stay in his embrace forever, looking at his handsome face and beautiful smile endlessly... If your pussy didn't ache from the tension of being restrained by his tall frame. "You're lucky you have such pretty eyes, otherwise I would be kneeling on your back right now"

Your obvious joke of physically overcoming him flew right over his head as your words of praise reached his ears - and a slight tint of pink immediately dusted his cheeks. From ear to ear.

You couldn't believe your eyes.

"Jean" your smile grew into the widest grin as the rarest species on planet Earth, flustered Jean hesitated momentarily, looking into your eyes. "Are you-"

You stopped your own words. Instantly wanting to tease him was like a natural instinct, but in a matter of moments, your urge to deepen that adorable blush on his face became overwhelming. You wanted him to know how much your lips desired his at that very moment. You wanted to make him feel good, you wanted to feel good.

Jean felt your body rise onto tiptoes under his arms as your heels parted from the ground and in a second, your face reached his, your lips connecting in a soft kiss.

You immediately melted at feeling each other's lips, sensitive nerves making your hungry minds explode with pleasure. Jean felt all tension leave your body, and let go of one of your wrists to catch you from collapsing. You literally felt your knees give out. Jean's arm felt so strong as it snaked around your waist, you barely audibly whimpered into the kiss - and Jean felt himself grow hard at the sweet sound.

"Mmph y- your lips feel so good" you mumbled against his soft lips and Jean was seeing stars. He never imagined your honeylike voice to be able to make him crumble even more in real life, than on the phone the other day. Your body so hot against his, the touch of your lips so plump and sweet on his, your scent making him feel like he was drunk out of his mind.

Jean let out a quiet moan as your tongue danced along his lower lip, then slipped into his mouth eagerly. Immediately after you granted access, his tongue answered, sliding against yours, and you felt warmth flooding your pussy at the wet sounds you two were making. Jean's one hand gripping your wrist, the other one slowly sliding on the side of your waist, finding its way under your hoodie, making contact with the sensitive skin close to your breast...

It all felt so filthy, you were turned on beyond belief.

“Do you have any idea what you do to me?” Jean grunted quietly after your lips parted, looking into your big, pleading eyes, but you already missed their warmth, so you softly pressed your lips back to his.

“What?” you whispered against him, your eyelids low from the heavenly feeling, and you felt Jean’s lips curve into a smile.

“You make me want to rip this off of you, right here, right now” Jean pulled on the sleeve of your hoodie, then with that same motion he grabbed your hand, removing it from its comfortable place on the side of his neck. You quietly whimpered as you felt one of his large hands gripping both of your wrists behind your back, his now free hand starting to slowly roam over your clothes. “You seem like the type of bad girl that likes the danger of getting caught”

“And you seem like the type to talk big, but do nothing” you knew exactly how bratty you sounded trying to tease Jean, but you also knew he had complete control over you. Your words were snarky, but your eyes blinked up at him with desperation, cheeks flushed with arousal.

Jean let out a chuckle.

“Yeah, you’re right” he smiled, but a sinful light flashed in his hazel eyes. Oh, you’re in for it. His free hand skimmed down to the brim of your hoodie, lifting it to expose the jeans tight on your butt. You unintentionally let out a sigh as his fingers gripped into the fabric and he started groping your ass without any shame. “I wouldn’t have the balls to touch you like that”

You felt wetness soaking through your panties at his firm touch, his breath hot on your ear as he looked at his own hand’s movements over your shoulder.

“I wouldn’t dare to pull these down” the groping stopped as a long finger creeped under the waist of your jeans, sending chills up your spine as he lightly dragged his fingertip along your skin. “What would we do if someone caught you with pants around your knees, moaning like a whore?”

“Jean” you quietly whined his name, losing your mind as his palm slid up your waist, over that stupid hoodie preventing his skin from touching yours.

“Getting desperate, are we?” he spoke softly, his hand stopping right at the underwire of your bra. Jean’s fingers moved carefully around the curve of your clothed tits, earning another whimper from you as you felt your pussy clench around nothing. “How outrageous would it be to grope your naked tits…”

You wanted him to grab them, feel the soft tissue with his hand, but Jean’s thumb just gently brushed over your nipple getting hard under the multiple layers of clothes.

“Or to take them into my mouth… Suck on them” Jean felt like all the blood in his body rushed to his groin as he pressed his thumb into the plush of your breast. Feeling you against himself, watching your eyes close in pleasure and your pretty swollen lips form an O made it extremely painful to hold his composure. Your flushed cheeks made him want to press you against the wall and do exactly what he just described. “A coward like me wouldn’t wanna get caught licking you, fingers buried in your wet little hole”

Jean felt his hard cock twitch in his pants as you pressed your hips even harder into him, desperate to feel his growing erection. His hand slid onto your delicate neck, fingers gently pushing into the sides.

“Holy-“ you mumbled, your head falling back as Jean leaned closer, his scruff scratching the sensitive skin as he earned access to your neck. His lips grazed over your skin, sending tingles down your body, and he deeply inhaled your sweet scent...

Then everything got cruelly ripped away from you in a matter of seconds.

“See ya tomorrow, smartass” you heard Jean’s voice and your eyes shot open, only to be met with his self-assured, cocky grin. He let go of your wrists and your neck, hands sliding into the pockets of his denim jacket while he stepped back, depriving you of the blissful heat of his body.

Jean felt so satisfied, so pleased with himself. You stood there for a moment, left utterly confused, your big eyes still eager, blinking towards him, swollen lips parted as if you wanted to say something, but the feeling of surprise made you catch your breath. You were so adorable, he had to hold back a chuckle.

He liked how confident sexual tension seemed to make you, but he just couldn’t help himself teasing you, making you go weak under his control.

“Je-“ a fragile little sound tried to break through the shock gripping your throat, but Jean’s reply cut you off as he turned his back to you, simply walking away.

“Tomorrow!”

You just stood there, astounded, your heart still racing, warmth filling your cheeks and panties damp from your wetness. Jean’s grip still burned the skin on your wrists and neck like a phantom. Your mind was so confused, you couldn’t even be mad at the man arrongantly strolling away from you like this was the most entertaining walk of his life.

And you completely forgot about the afternoon class you were originally headed to.

Frustration quickly turned into confidence as you stood in front of the mirror in your dorm after your little ice cream date with Sasha, getting ready for the party. It was a rare occasion, so you let your hair down, to Sasha’s biggest delight.

"You look sooo good, dear lord!" she exclaimed with an enthusiastic smile, encouraging you to do a little spin and she howled like a wolf.

"C'mon, it's not that special" you laughed at her excessive reaction. "But you do look breathtaking in that dress, emerald suits you"

"You think so?" Sasha looked down at herself, hands soothing the thin fabric. It was quite short, sleeves off the shoulders, showing off her delicate, pale skin. She truly looked beautiful.

"Niccolo's gonna pee his pants seeing you" you nodded and Sasha cracked up.

"He better pee his pants" she slipped her arms into her bolero. "And Jean better jizz his pants, to be honest"

"Sasha!" you chuckled as you shook your head, trying to shake off the thought of Jean orgasming, in any way, before your blushing could give any awkward feelings away. Sasha jumped to you and leaned over to pull your dress in all the right places to make it look even better. It was black and tight, its length ending right above your knees, but a longer slit letting one of your thighs be seen.

"What? You're a goddess, you better start believing that" Sasha threw her oversized leather jacket on your shoulders. "C'mon, grab your phone, let's go"

Connie's parents must be delighted to let a bunch of kids trash their house, you thought, as Sasha closed the door of your Uber and caught up to you waiting on the pavement. It seemed like a nice and quiet neighborhood, now muffled thuds breaking the silence of the street as you heard the bass of the music coming from inside.

"Bruh, Cornelius told me he invited twenty people at max" Sasha noted as you walked past a few unfamiliar faces sitting on the stairs of the front porch, drinking and cackling loudly. She swung the front door open like she owned the place, and the brutal noise hit you in your chest.

"Who the hell is Cornelius?" you asked with an amused laugh, but Sasha couldn't hear you anymore, the sound of loud music, people shouting, laughing and just generally being intoxicated deafening both of you. Sasha grabbed your hand, pulling you through the crowd.

Bumping into a bunch of strangers in a dimly lit room and loud noise overwhelming your senses was not how you imagined Connie's "friendly get together" to go.

"There he is" Sasha let go of your hand as you reached the kitchen, the lights brighter and the noise slightly less disturbing than in the crowded living room. You leaned against the doorframe where Sasha left you as you watched Sasha punch Connie's arm without a word being spoken between them.

"AARGH, are you out of your mind?" Connie jumped back from the open fridge in shock, his hand shooting towards the painful shoulder.

"You told me it was gonna be a small party! How are we supposed to order pizza for so many people?" Sasha yelled at him, absolutely infuriated about the food situation.

Non-existant food situation, may we add.

"Why should we order pizza for everyone?! I don't even know them, who cares?" Connie yelled back at her, grabbing a bottle of beer from the fridge. "Did you come over to ask brainless questions, or will you let me have a fucking break?"

"Hi Y/n!" you suddenly heard your name from behind and your head snapped towards the familiar voice. You were met with Berthold's smile and his usual peaceful expression, not even minding Sasha and Connie killing each other in the background.

"Hi Bert" you smiled back, happy to see him. You rarely got to talk to him at the one single class you had together. "How are you?"

"Uh, good thanks, barely holding on inside this hell of a house" he replied and you chuckled, perfectly understanding his struggle with crowded, loud places.

"You're telling me! I feel like exploding and we just arrived" you shook your head. "Where's Annie?"

"We're sitting outside on the patio, you should join us. It's a lot more quiet out there" he suggested as a large hand slapped on his shoulder. You looked up at the tall man appearing next to Bert, broad shoulders towering over you, fingers running through his blonde hair, bright eyes and a charming smile glistening towards you. "This is my friend, Reiner, by the way. I don't think you've met"

"Nice to meet you, Reiner" you nodded with a friendly smile and he accepted your hand reaching towards him, shaking it gently.

"The pleasure's mine, Y/n" Reiner softly returned your smile, and you started to feel flustered at the intense eye contact. "How come I've never seen you around campus?"

"She's pretty lame, looks like a grey little mouse most of the time" an unmistakable voice appeared next to you, and you turned to Jean sticking out your  tongue in an instant. Bert rolled his eyes with a laugh and went over to the fridge, probably getting the drinks he originally came there for.

"Who asked the blockhead?" you snapped back as Jean stopped close to you, one arm pressing to yours, grinning down at you.

Your heart secretly started racing just by seeing him.

"Dunno man, looks like a gorgeous mouse to me" Reiner said winking at you, then turned and went to join Bert pondering in front of the open fridge. Warmth spread on your face as you watched Reiner grab a beer, and you deliberately avoided looking at Jean. "You want one, Jeanbo?"

"Nah, I'm good, thanks" Jean replied casually, but clenched his teeth as he looked down at your face, blushed from his compliment. The hell are you blushing for? Is this buff jock what you're into? Reiner, really?

Jean's jaw relaxed at the thought of how you'd probably clown him for being jealous. Jealous, good lord... It was like you sensed his eyes stuck on you, you raised your face to look at him with those big, sparkling eyes.

How could he not be jealous?

"Big man's not wrong" Jean said softly, so only you could hear, his eyes glancing over your outfit, then back to your face, and you felt your cheeks burn under his look. "You look beautiful"

Your heart fluttered at his words and you couldn't help the smile instantly widening on your face. You turned your whole body towards Jean and felt your stomach flip at how his hazel eyes glistened right back at you with a warm smile.

"You look pretty handsome yourself" you grinned, moving to hold both of his hands. Jean's heart fluttered to the same rhythm yours did as the sight of your pretty smile and the touch of your fingers combined started to make him melt. "This shirt looks so good on you"

Your fingers ran along the collar of his dark button-up shirt, the fabric soft, comfy and smelling of his delicious scent.

"Don't try to make me blush, you little rat" he grunted with a low voice, making you laugh out loud, and he lifted his hands to grab both sides of your face, long fingers reaching into your hair at the nape of your neck. Tingles ran down your spine as your arms moved automatically to hug his waist as he stood so close to you. "Where are your glasses, smartass?"

"I'm wearing contacts" you blinked up at him as he stroked a few strands of your hair to tug them behind your ears.

Your stomach doing a backflip once again.

"I like the glasses" he brushed his thumb over your cheek, then looked back to your eyes, making your body burn with the familiar sense of warmth. "But you look pretty regardless"

You swallowed your reply as Jean's eyes shot to your lips. So plump and invitingly glistening with gloss. He wanted to kiss you so much.

"I like the earrings, too" Jean swiftly shifted his eyes to the little silver figures dangling from your ears. He  thought they wonderfully emphasized your delicate little neck.

"Thanks, they're ladybugs" you grinned and Jean chuckled.

"Are they your little magical ladybugs? I knew you were a witch" he watched with a smirk as you bursted into laughing. He also noticed the shimmery eyeshadow on your eyelids, and how the makeup and your jewellery complimented your look so well. Although he knew exactly how gorgeous you were without them.

"You're very attentive tonight, Jeanbo" you sneered at him and Jean rolled his eyes at your smug smile. He hated that nickname.

"He's my teammate, your ass is not allowed to use that name"

"Will I be allowed if I start beating you with a stick as well?" your smile widened at making Jean crack up.

"The hell do you think we do while playing hockey?" he laughed, one of his hands moving to grab your chin. "It's not just beating each other with sticks, believe it or not"

"Sure" you borderline didn't even know what you were talking about. Not even having a sip of alcohol yet, you smiled up at Jean drunkenly, intoxicated by how good he felt to all of your senses at that moment.

Sasha's loud sounds of excitement snapped you both out of your own little world.

"WHAT, they're filled with cherry cream?!" she covered her mouth with a hand, in a state of complete shock as Niccolo held out a tray of cupcakes in front of her.

Niccolo nodded with an enthusiastic smile in your direction, and you waved at him with an amused chuckle as Jean let go of you and walked over to them. You've already met Niccolo countless times, but you could never get enough of their emotion-filled interactions with Sasha - strong emotions about food, mostly.

"Hey!" Connie yelped as Sasha slapped his hand trying to steal from the dessert. "This is my house, give me a cupcake!"

"It's your father's house, Constance" Sasha stated seriously, and you bursted out laughing as Connie's low-lidded stare met your eyes. He was so tired of the names.

"Are you pulling these names out of your ass?"

"I'm pulling the cupcake out of your ass, if you dare to steal any of- HEY!" Sasha practically jumped on Connie's back as he rapidly grabbed one of them from the tray, trying to get away and stuff it into his mouth before Sasha could stop him.

A few people, unfamiliar with this otherwise very usual situation, quickly left the kitchen before they found themselves in the middle of a physical altercation, and you and Jean were in absolute hysterics.

"Eat it then, you fucking piece of pie!" Sasha shouted at Connie, still riding on his back, smearing the cherry cupcake around his face with her palm.

"Uh- Yo-" Connie's desperate attempts of yells were muffled as Niccolo tried to pull Sasha from him with no success. "Y'suff- You'll suffocate me!"

"Ah, feels like I never left town" a voice laughed loudly next to you, and you raised your teary eyes to look at the stranger. The tall, brunette man stepped straight to Jean, throwing an arm around his shoulders as he snatched his head in his direction.

"MARCO!"

[kirabasai]

modern tobiizu au where izuna and tobirama are rival e-sport players. they take the competition the most seriously out of the entire league. they are a pr nightmare and definition of toxic competition because they constantly go on twitter and shit on the other. they deliberately fuel fanwars. people call them the physical embodiment of league of legends despite the fact they don't even play league of legends (leaving what game they play ambiguous).

tobirama invents new ways of playing the game and abuses bugs in competions until abusing bugs gets banned because it reached a point where he was discovering exploits faster than the devs could patch them. izuna shits on tobirama for a full twitch stream saying how tobirama needed those bugs to even match him, and he says he hates how he ended up adding a new rule to the league because of how he played. izuna doesn't even play the same as tobirama, its just the principle of the fact he got a whole new rule made.

izuna is really intuitive, he's fast at figuring out new strats and mechanics and enjoys mimicing other ppl's playstyles as a form of psychological warfare. his reaction speed is very fast; "oh, you're ambushing me? lol get rektd." he goes through mouses like his monster energy cans because he just keeps breaking them (they can't handle the stress of his intense playstyle). if he had a mouse that was actually well made, he probably would not have this problem. however, those mouses just don't feel the same as the super specific, dirt cheap $15 mouse he got down at konoha-mart (or so he insists). he has a closet filled with boxes of this mouse for when he inevitably breaks it again.

one of tobiizu's pr nightmares happened like this:

at one point izuna figured out rpf fanfiction existed so he encouraged his fans to write really bad fanfiction of tobirama. why? he wanted to send it to tobirama so he could witness tobirama snap/explode/have a conniption. psychological warfare. this wasn't too bad, actually.

until tobirama publicly tweeted a link to a 100k word slowburn fanfiction he wrote detailing a forbidden love affair between uchiha izuna, professional esport player, and uchiha madara, the retired esport player who is his team's manager and his BROTHER. izuna livestreamed himself screaming for 30 minutes straight. he cried off camera. pr for both teams scrambled as they had to clarify, no this work is not real (because some people are dumb). madara has to announce his engagement for ppl to stop thinking he and his brother r like that. he's not engaged, but the internet scrambling to figure out who his (nonexistent) fiance is makes tobirama's fanfiction fall out of focus so it works out. originally the pr team wanted izuna to come out as straight but he flat out refused because "if everyone thinks i'm straight i'm doomed to not ever have a boyfriend" (he is bi and very dramatic.) he also gets back at tobirama for this eventually with the Hacked Reddit Incident (in which he hacked tobirama's reddit acct and posted various (nonexistent) issues on various subreddits, including AITA. everyone figured out very quickly it wasn't tobirama but that didn't matter to tobi because not only was his pride wounded, those posts will forever be associated with him [because things can still circulate around the internet even after the original post is deleted])

so yeah. i think you can imagine how the fandom space is if tobiizu r pulling stunts like that off extremely frequently. (chaos. its pure chaos.) somebody is probably crying in a corner, somewhere.

at one point somebody likens tobiizu's dynamic to a boy pulling on his crush's pigtails at a playground, except for them it goes both ways and is far more extreme. this spirals into the fandoms splitting into four factions: "omg they're so in love they're adorable like little kittens", "are y'all fucking CRAZY", "im just chilling here can we pls go back to normal", and unaware. tobiizu find out very quickly, and for once don't know what to do. the pr teams are just glad its nothing negative, for once.

(tobiizu are screaming in e/o's dms like this is YOUR fault. no its YOUR fault. they dont realize it but they're acting exactly like how the person who sparked it all said.)

(they'll get there. eventually.)

(somewhere, somebody is wondering "how can two people so smart be so DUMB.")

(finished this post after over a month bcause my pookie @oh-no-its-bird asked me to here u go bestie it's finally here <3)

[pix-writes]

Thank you so much for answering my question! You always give very thorough and thoughtful answers 🥹🥹 If you don't mind me asking, can I ask the same question about friendships (possible lovers later, just like with Stanley) but with Ford? Thank you so much again, I really love reading your analysis 🥹🙌🏻✨️!!

Aw thank you! ☺️

(answer under cut)

I think I've gone over a little bit about how Ford would be in the beginning of a friendship/relationship in this post. Mainly talking about how his flaws/past wound would hinder him forming relationships, generally.

Though I did mention that I think Ford would be easy to bond with, in terms of connecting over something intellectual or nerdy. If you're someone who is game to tag along on research or adventures and can lend a hand figuratively/physically, then your friendship will start to grow, as quality time is the best way to get to know him (he may be a hero/adventurer, but he's truly an introvert with introvert hobbies). Shared interests are something that seems very important to Ford, having been starved of a lot of affection and deeper connections in the past, especially since he found making friends in school/college; so as long as you share a few passions, he'll open up to you fairly quickly.

However, it will take him more time to form a romantic connection and for him to act on it, it will be very slow burn because firstly, he simply doesn't move fast in a relationship, or at least not as fast as modern dating seems to be, and second of all because he has a little insecurity over whether you're interested in him or not/should be interested in him. It takes Ford a little bit to be convinced you won't get your head turned by someone more 'suitable' in his mind. This is also in part to the trauma from Bill's manipulation and torture, whilst you may have only connected after bill was erased, it still brings up trust issues in him and he needs to feel he could trust a partner - as well as work through anxiety about putting you in potential danger (will be quite protective over you as a partner as a result of this).

Kindness will go a long way in securing his opinion of you as someone trustworthy, not only to him but Ford seeing you be kind to his family, your other friends, even to strangers or just plain altruistic in actions not just in words, means that he can trust that he has evidence to back up what he thinks of you and not fall into a similar trap like he did with bill.

Also will admire you for any show of bravery or doing what is right (especially if it's in a situation where it's against the odds, whether it's something dire or a situation where it would be easy to give into social pressures). He appreciates when people say what they mean and are direct with him, as he'll be the same with them (I'm neurodivergent and I hc Ford is too, so this may be specific to being ND, as it's confusing when neurotypical people talk in circles to me!)

Friendship with Ford would include:

watching nerdy TV/films together, whilst I think Ford has only passingly known of/shown interest in world events even before the portal incident, he still managed to have some semblance of interests/life outside of his research, it may arguably not have been a lot, but considering his interest in dnd (including the intergalactic versions) and how he wanted to drop everything to play it with dipper in that one episode, he is definitely interested in catching up on all the nerdy TV/films he's missed out on, cue watching LOTR, star wars, star trek etc. However his gaps in world events comes up as well at the most random of times, he didn't really ask much on what he's missed out in world news (it's not relevant to his work or so he thinks), which can be both hilarious and sad, as as his friend you have to catch him up or remind him (e.g. 'no sixer, the soviet union doesn't exist any more, remember?' 'oh yeah, there was a war in Afghanistan... What do you mean how did it start?!')

playing board games/video games, like I said above Ford is a long time player of ttrpgs and so you will be persuaded into playing some version of a DND campaign if you're not already into it. Ford's excellent at teaching the mechanics and actually pretty good at roleplay and DMing, he can't do many voices but his storytelling is masterful (he is an author after all, even if he wasn't writing fiction and has lots of past practice from college). Dives straight into 5e, learns it quickly and creates his own homebrew version in no time at all! If you introduce him to the concept of dnd shows, he becomes a critter for sure! Essek and Percy are his favourite characters in Critical Role. Hums the theme song sometimes when he's working in the lab. Dipper gets him into Minecraft and you together construct a large home base and underground lab in the game. A lot of these games can take a long time, definitely have stayed up till 3 or 4 am on a campaign more than once.

research in the lab together or out in the field and debating with Ford about all sorts of topics, including your current research projects and both of your hypotheses. You might not have the same skill set as him but he values a different perspective from his own, you help balance out his hyperfocus. Is protective of you if something might be dangerous, will want him to be the one that gets hit/hurt if anyone has to, though both of you have had to patch up the other.

Getting into debates: Ford loves a mental challenge, he doesn;t realise its good for him (consciously/not until post-weirdmageddon) but having someone who isn't afraid to challenge him or speak their mind with him helps to keep him grounded and for him to really pause and think about his theories/morals. It doesn't have to be too deep though, perhaps you simply disagree on something, this will turn into a full debate, but despite some thinking you're arguing, its more of a passionate conversation, you're both having fun. Plus its even more fun when Ford ends up agreeing with you (its rare but it boosts your ego when it does happen)

related to the adventures a little: expect Ford to praise you/your efforts, (reminds me a bit like the 9th doctor or Sherlock) will just be doing something or figuring out a code or puzzle he'll exclaim "fascinating!" Or brilliant/fantastic/excellent/good, sometimes he's not aware he's saying these hushed phrases! Or he'll follow it up with questions, eyes lit up from being energised in his work, like "fascinating! How did you reach that conclusion?" 🤓

catching him up on technology, he finds it difficult compared to the high tech stuff from other universes but I like to hc he would get over it eventually, he's not the most adept in terms of keeping up with internet culture but is when it comes to tinkering with technology and experimenting/improving it. Still likes to call people instead of text and will have regular phone calls with you if you or him are away from each other.l, eases his worries about you (he's protective and still has nightmares from time to time so he likes to hear your voice so he knows you're ok).

Spending quieter moments together, even if its just stargazing on the stan o war whilst stan fishes, if you're close friends, I can imagine Ford would like hugs, holding hands and on the odd occaision napping cuddled up together (platonically) - the naps happened by accident at first, however its nice and your adventures are exhausting sometimes, so you now get the weighted blanket for you to both lie under for an hour or two (Mabel definitely has a picture of you asleep on her phone because its adorable).

Ford hasn't driven for 30 yrs (well not a regular old car anyway) so you've definitely had to drive him places/collect him before because his attempts at driving are almost as reckless as Stan is behind the wheel 😬 on a boat though? He's the most trustworthy captain 🫡 meticulous on the safety checks, will boss you and stan about a little on what to do, but you know it's for good reason... most of the time

[maxwell-grant]

Any thoughts on AKI in SF6?

I haven't had a chance to play the game yet and I might do a more thorough look into the newcomers after I do sit through World Tour, but yeah I got some AKI thoughts. Holy shit what a design. Top 15-20 in the series, it is one hell of a different thing to watch it animated by the character's personality and moveset and vibe. We expected some FANG-isms, some Juri-isms, but certainly not that. We expected a cold, even generic assassin, not someone who merrily treats the penal code like a list of chores.

It was pretty funny seeing the reaction to her develop from "oh she's FANG's apprentice, okay I guess, not sure anyone was asking for that", to "is she the new Juri, she's got a really similar vibe", to "holy shit Juri's got NOTHING on her". In reaction to her popularity, SF6 had been doing a lot of great character work on Juri that, while making her much more developed and entertaining as a character (cringe failgirl Juri was such a revelation) and dramatically more interesting as a person, also really limits the extent to which she can be a straight-up villain anymore. Much like how FANG was designed to fill the void left by Sagat, AKI here crashed the scene to fill the void left by Juri, and so she gets to be not just completely 100% horrible (where as Juri is like, 70-80% horrible), but also SCARY in a way Juri never could be. She gets so, so much out of not being designed for sex appeal and coolness first and foremost, she's like the D'Vorah to Juri's Mileena.

She's a horrible, predatory character, and much like Marisa, I don't think she would have been allowed at all to exist the way she does had she debuted prior (you just know they would have not given her those sick ass pants or given her a different haircut or a cleavage window or something stupid like that). The development team for V repeteadly stated that there were ideas for a new assassin apprentice character related to Gen thrown around and that some of those made their way into FANG and Seth, and AKI is the end result of that very long refinement process. She's the resident freakshow character in the tradition started by Blanka and Dhalsim, and she's the outrageous over-the-top counterpoint to the more traditional martial arts like Chun-Li or even Jamie (much like Adon, or Necro). She's the understudy of the kung fu assassin villain, and in a way akin to Menat she's the young new apprentice of a prior character who acts as a stand-in for that character on the roster and driven to prove her worth before said character, while also being a modern do-over of said character.

(And for the record I actually like FANG quite a bit, a lot more than most of the other V characters. He played like garbage and his execution was lacking and couldn't make up for a terrible first impression in the fanbase, but the design and character and concept I thought were very solid and I'm glad AKI shows they didn't give up on it but took steps to improve on it, I'm glad to see him again in 6).

She breaks new ground for the series by leaning strongly into a horror wraith vibe no other character had before, and she's the Street Fighter equivalent to characters like Voldo, a horrible contortionist slasher villain who doesn't fight you so much as she just passionately and exquisitely butchers you while getting off on it. Her moves are incredible, superbly characterized, she feels vicious and oppressive to watch but still hits that note on FANG's where the playstyle is meant to be tricky but overspecialized and beatable at close range. And while she's designed to be a much more explicitly serious and deadly-looking character than FANG, they even give her goofy little flourishes like blowing bubbles shaped like FANG (and getting pissed if you pop them), his propensity for bird-like arms flapping, and an uncharacteristically childish victory dance akin to Chun-Li's.

She is as cadaverous as Juri is tempestuous, openly referring to herself as a ghost, and when she isn't losing her shit in contorting fits of laughter over success, she has a remarkably chill, upbeat disposition when spouting horrible things to the protagonist or fake poisoning them for laughs. She has an incredibly distinct personality more so than any especially developed inner life, and that's kinda the point: that she has wholly and completely sublimated herself to her role as FANG's tool, by choice and intent of her own, and that's part of why she's a real deal villain.

She was raised by him, she likes what he likes, she is obsessed with everything he is and has done and will do, hates everyone that isn't him, considers him her master and teacher and father and husband all in one, and her romantic fixation and love for him is meant to be deeply disturbing in every way imaginable (and only not a total dealbreaker for me because FANG in no way reciprocates or encourages it or is able to do so, even AKI understands as much), and that they may eventually have to kill each other doesn't deter her one bit.

Despite those surface similarities, there is quite a lot that sets AKI apart from Juri, chief of those being that Juri was victimized by Shadaloo and in response fashioned herself into an instrument of vengeance and turned monstrous as a result, where as AKI actively chose her life and chose being molded by someone else, running away from home and following FANG every step of the way without any regret. Even FANG himself had little choice in his own life, kidnapped as a child and forced to partake in horrible training under which every day could be his last, raised to value nothing but survival at all costs.

Perhaps this in itself is the strength that FANG saw in AKI, that she gets to choose and does so with far greater intent than even himself. That she's someone who could fully understand the horribleness of the Nguuhao methods and lifestyle and want for that and nothing else, to consciously partake in such grueling torture of mind and body and lovingly decide that she can't get enough of it.

And in itself this pairs interestingly with the very idea of giving FANG a dedicated protege sidekick, a character beat that the series has come back to again and again, and takes on an entirely different tone here. I think a lot of what makes AKI's obsession interesting to me in a way these usually aren't, is not just because it's creepy, but because it's ultimately sad and pathetic, and parallels FANG's own craven worship of Bison. It's such a great dynamic, a miserable cycle perpetuated by miserable people caught on the wrong side of that glorification of self-improvement, inner strength and the great heroes and masters who can pass it onto others that the series uses so frequently, and it makes AKI even greater as a character for it: because now we have a true dark mirror for the driving motivation of many of our characters. We have our fucked-up toxic counterpart to every Sakura, Mika, Menat, and Sean out there.

She sees him as he saw Bison and more, and the fact that she is much more threatening and overtly competent and scary than FANG is offset by the fact that worshipping Bison is a wholly different thing than worshipping, y'know, FANG. We comprehend, on some level, FANG's worship, because M.Bison is supposed to be, at minimum, a cool imposing megavillain we're meant to like on some level, which is certainly not true for FANG. SF6 has been very clear on that, that even though he's been given a much slicker outfit, and is keeping a low profile to plot from behind the scenes, this is still very much FANG, every bit the conniving, petty control freak from before.

AKI is a cool, hypercompetent death machine able to scare the pants off the main villain, and she labors desperately day and night, to the point of crying if she fails, to meet the approval of a ridiculous, pathetic man who, no matter how deceptively cunning or dangerous he may be, is only cool to her. Much of why I think FANG worked and was necessary in the first place was because he was designed around the vacuum left by the Four Kings and to contrast them, as what kind of man would it take to work himself ragged running Bison's schemes and being unfailingly loyal to him and Shadaloo, opposite Vega and Balrog's sporadic barely-there alliances and Sagat's outright betrayal. We needed an anti-Sagat, a proper bastard of a Number 2 to run the show in secret. And AKI adds a lot of poignancy to that in that she is much of what FANG can't be, even as she wants nothing more than to be like him.

It's one thing to have somebody who really looks up to and makes an effort to imitate the cool and impressive and heroic World Warriors, or someone influenced by imposing villains like Balrog or Sagat but ultimately decides to carve their own path. It's another thing entirely for maybe THE most obsessive protege character in the series, someone who actively has no identity outside of servitude to her master, to revolve around FANG, the dastardly bird man, who made his debut in a story by hunting down and melting an innocent woman, and grossly and animastically licking her ashen remains off his fingers. What kind of person would decide that this sickening, vile creep is deserving of worship and following until the ends of the Earth?

(art by @remy2fang)

Well, maybe the same kind of person who would consciously look at the likes of M.Bison in the first place, someone they intuitively understand "will reign death on all living beings", and upends their life on the spot towards becoming that man's eternal servant. Someone who seeks self-fulfillment through no other means than the pursuit of strength and knowledge as tools to subjugate others and appease their master. The darkest corruption of the master-student dynamic that defines so much of the series. You couldn't ask for anything more fitting, for the poison specialists.

[ivyial]

Reading one of your answers, I noticed that you wrote “Leon has a crush” and while I was playing the game, I also had such thoughts because a man cannot behave like that if he does not feel something. Can you please explain how you were convinced of this?

hi there!! i'm so very late to this ask i'm sorry :,)

so i'm gonna try and retrace the steps of how i realised that (from a year or so ago lolol). one thing you have to know about me before we begin is that i cannot recognise flirting for SHIT LMAOAOAO like genuinely. it is BAD. i am seriously socially impaired in that department.

when i played re4r last year, i had not played the og re4 (i still haven't, as a matter of fact). so i went into it relatively blind, with no opinion about leon/ashley (it did not seem like a big enough ship that people were ever giving their opinions on it, apart from the 'overtime' part in the og). i knew a bit about ashley, and how annoying a big chunk of the fandom found her in the og, and that was about it.

ashley flirting with leon in the game was somewhat obvious. the "i think you'd look pretty dashing" line was a big giveaway, although other than that, she doesn't actually make any big move on leon (sure, she offers him to become part of her security detail at the end, but yeah).

HOWEVER.

the dining hall scene happened - leon telling ashley "i'm not used to having such good company"???? that definitely made go 💡!!!

also, if you go back to chapter 9, after ashley's playable section, she finds leon again in the cage, and he says to her "can you make it down? i can catch you". i didn't find his words odd, but i found his tone extremely specific. if you go back and listen, it doesn't exactly sound like a matter-of-fact offer. it sounds like an incentive, but i wasn't so sure whether it was more for ashley's benefit or his own. he just sounds so bashful saying it and he's smiling. maybe that's just me, but i definitely found his tone suggestive in that scene. at the time i just shrugged it off as me misunderstanding tone (as it happens sometimes).

i originally was not predisposed to seeing them as a couple, since i'd never really seen the possibility of it being evoked in the modern RE fandom. i was more of a cleon girlie at the time too (i still am, but not as much nowadays). so i finished the game for the first time thinking "aw, leon and ashley had such a great dynamic, he's very supportive of her and kind, they're a great (platonic) fit". but then, you know, there was still the flirting initiated by ashley, the flirting (?) initiated by leon, and that unusual tone that he had in chapter 9.

so i didn't really see the bigger picture until i read the leshley/eagleone posts written by @sapphire-weapon (if you haven't checked her blog out yet, you have to, not just for her leon/ashley posts, but even for her general meta analyses which are absolutely brilliant). and then, i started putting it together, noticing the instances of leon flirting with ashley, some of which i'd missed, the structure of the story, etc.

and from there, well. you realise how well leon and ashley work together, even in a platonic setting, and you add their occasional flirting, as well as the DINING HALL SCENE??? which to me is a massive giveaway and is one of the things that convinced me the most apart from their literal interactions. room with red wallpaper, a statue of two snakes that could either be fighting or, well, fucking lmao (i also don't need to explain the phallic symbol there), the queen/king paintings, and the fact that this is one of the few rooms in this game where they are not interrupted by any enemies. it's a very private setting + "well, yeah, but i'm not used to having such good company".

leon's crush is also demonstrated through the way ashley pulls out a softer side of him.

you can see in chapter 13 (when he calls out for her from the other side of the cell - if you listen closely, it sounds like nick apostolides is reverting back to re2 leon's voice for that line).

there is also quite a bit of (sometimes unnecessary) physical contact between the two, which is almost always initiated by leon (it might even always be him). see: the way he holds on to her just a bit too long after catching her when she jumps out of the church window + the way they look at each other (chapter 5), right after escaping the ganados and joining luis in the villa (chapter 5), comforting ashley in the castle (chapter 9), and most importantly, checking on her after opening the cell and letting his fingers trail along her arms etc. (chapter 13) and (not physical contact but intended) the way he manages to break saddler's hold to reach for ashley when saddler touches her head on the altar (chapter 15). and i mean, he carries her bridal style multiple times (either catches her when she jumps or carries her like that on the way to the lab) (that in itself is also for the sake of practicality, but it adds to it).

taken separately, these events would probably not mean anything, but when you look at it all together, you realise that leon's feelings for ashley run deeper than just professionalism. i don't think he has to act like that - or at least, not if capcom just wanted them to be PURELY PLATONIC PURELY SIBLING CODED as one part of the fandom shouts all day long

this is a very long answer but yeah!! i hope this answers your question. btw, feel free to send me more leon/ashley asks!! i'd love to answer them :3

[nudgeling]

I've had a resurgence of listening to First Aid Kit recently so I decided to pair up a bunch of their songs and lyrics to traffic characters and ships. I'm surprised they’re not more popular in fandom spaces since they’re pretty similar genre-wise to both Crane Wives and the Oh Hellos, so consider this is my community pitch (+ commentary cuz i wanna)

Fleeting one - BigB

"My love is a fleeting one / My man could be anyone / And our love is a setting sun / My life is fleeting one / My work is just a web I've spun / Oh, my life is a setting sun / Baffled by the lives we were lent / We met the end too soon / I was honest when I told you / We're as cryptic as the moon"

BigB has a bit of a history with wavy loyalties. The secret soulmates with Grian, betraying Cleo, and most recently tricking Skizz (I know that was resolved but a pattern is a pattern my man). And well, not that I have any clue what the man's up with all the cryptic gaslighting but I feel like that applies as well.

The lyrics outside the chorus seem to be about a couple falling out of love, but I like to apply it to him and Cleo, which still fits fairly well. Angst galore ofc.

Wolf - Pearl

"When I run through the deep dark forest long after this begun / Where the sun would set, the trees were dead, and the rivers were none / And I hope for a trace to lead me back home from this place / But there was no sound there was only me and my disgrace"

Scratch this being the most Pearl-like FAK song, this is the most Pearl song ever. It's basically what started this whole project. All the lyrics and all the vibes just screams DL Pearl. The song is also a bop, one of my personal favs, if I were to recommend just one of these to listen to then this is a strong contender.

Josefin - Martyn

"You go home with feet bare in the snow / You raise up your head to the dead / You seek of such magical things / And nobody knows where you've been"

This smells of watcher lore guys. Don’t have much more commentary than that, it’s just watcher lore straight up.

King of the World - Lizzie

"I keep running around / Trying to find the ground / But my head is in the stars / And my feet are in the sky / Well I'm nobody's baby / I'm everybody's girl / I'm the queen of nothing / I'm the king of the world"

The lyrics is giving Last Life Lizzie, but it’s also one of the more whimsical-sounding songs on the list which feels very Lizzie in general.

I'll admit the rest of the lyrics isn’t particularly easy to tie into the life series since there’s a bunch of specific modern references like going to the airport and traveling through states, but I love the song way too much not to include it. Might be the personal favourite.

Rebel heart - Desert duo

"You told me once I have a rebel heart / I don't know if that's true / But I believe you saw something in me that lives inside you too / Now I all I hear is the wind / There’s a storm coming through / Did I misplace or forsake my love now that I gave it to you?"

Picking just one lyric section from this song was difficult. Every single word, top to bottom, fits Scarian like a glove. It also slams in a "But I know you truly saw me / Even if just for a while" which just MMMM. Makes me wanna bite someone.

I Found a Way - Treebark

"We play the game with skillful hands / And so I asked for your demands / "Give me your love, give me your gun" / And you traced us back to where we begun"

Tbh this song could apply to a lot of traffic dynamics but it had a lot of loyalty themes which is why I put it at Treebark specifically. That being said: man. It works so well. Specifically Martyn POV. The gun in the lyric above would ofc be the beheading, plus the song later mentions the protagonist having a lot of guilt and being prone to running. It's got C!Martyn all over it.

My Silver Lining - Skizz

"I try not to hold on to what is gone / I try to do right what is wrong / I try to keep on keeping on / Yeah I just keep on keeping on / I hear a voice calling / Calling out for me / These shackles I've made in an attempt to be free / Be it for reason, be it for love / I won't take the easy road"

This is another one where it just is Skizz. He’s probably been the most consistantly loyal and good-natured person in the series, doing anything and everything for his team. I feel this especially with how he was in Limited Life, being determined to spread some light into the world despite the game they found themselves in. When making this list I found that most of these songs could fit multiple dynamics/characters, but this is his song, full stop.

Stay Gold - Flower Husbands

"The sun shone high those few summer days / Left us in a soft, wide-eyed haze / It shone like gold / It shone like gold / But just as the moon, it shall stray / So dawn goes down today / No gold can stay / No gold can stay"

👏ANGST👏GALORE

Another one where I just want to quote the whole song. The song is all about grieving time periods and memories you can’t get back, to which I'm thinking late-game 3rd life, post-3rd life divorce or s1 empires characters having weird nostalgia. I go feral for all of it.

Bonus empires:

Heavy storm - Sausage

"I saw, I saw, I saw, I saw an old photograph / And the picture that appeared / Well, it took me back to the times / When she was around / She used to play that old mandolin / And the moon and the sea invited her in / I wish that I had told her by then / What she knew deep down / That she only wished that time would come back"

S1 Sausage angst my beloved. Or s2, could work either way, but I'm partial to s1. "She" could be either Pearl or Gem, however there is a "he" in the first chorus which is very much Fhwip. Like Stay Gold it’s all about grieving old times, so I like to imagine a post S1 Sausage grieving his old family :D

[badwolfwho1]

It's halfway through the year? Got any favorite albums/books/tv shows/whatever to recommend?

So for the first time I have actually been keeping a spreadsheet with the intent of ranking all the things this year to keep track of what I've read/watched etc and not rely on my memory so in theory this should be easy but in truth I've only been updating it for movies and books so I will have to rely on my memory after all.

Albums

I do not keep track of the albums I've been listening but I have been listening to Avantasia's discography lately and it's all been hitting for me, I think the Wicked Symphony especially was my favourite of their work.

I also listened to The Moody Blues' 'Days of Future Passed' just today so I'll mention that as well, I enjoyed it. (I fully intended to come back here and write some more later but I guess I didn't, it's neat I guess)

Judging based off my liked songs on Spotify I really liked most of Deep Purple's album 'House of Blue Light' and both of Savage Garden's albums.

For a perennial I still love The Bangles' third album "Everything", my first listen I had a few standouts like "In Your Room", "Be With You", "Something to Believe In" but I currently adore pretty much every track on there.

Have I listened to much modern this year? Alas no I am cursed by most of my current listening habits coming from deciding to check out whatever is being referenced in the current episode of Jojo that I'm rewatching and since I just reached Part 5 that means at best they'll be 25 years old.

Books

I've actually kept track of my books so this should be easy, 'Catch 22'; It's a classic for a reason, it's just really really good.

The Adrian Tchaikovsky zone; I read 'City of Last Chances', its sequel 'House of Open Wounds' and the final part of the Final Architecture trilogy 'Lords of Uncreation' this year, all phenomenal (2, 3 and 4 on my books of the year list), City of Last Chances slightly pips the others (and as the opener to a series is the easiest rec). You get a huge and diverse range of points of view all over a city under imperial occupation, great worldbuilding as I always expect from him. There's even a giant centipede what more can you ask for? (I'm also reading his Alien Clay right now, that's a stand alone novel starring a scientist exiled to a work camp on another planet because of his political activism, real good so far, love all the weird alien life it has. It'll probably be joining the Tchaikovsky zone unsure where at though yet)

Oh I've just noticed Bret Hart's biography isn't on my list so I gotta say "Hitman", incredible. The life of a wrestler is wild and Bret Hart especially has had quite the life. So much I didn't know about. The best there is, the best there was and the best there ever will be (but not the best on my list).

The rest of my top ten, CL Clarke's 'The Unbroken' and 'The Faithless', Amal El-Mohtar and Max Gladstone's 'This is How You Lose the Time War', AK Larkwood's 'The Ten Thousand Eyes' and Garth Marenghi's Terrortome

Games

I feel like I've barely played any games this year. Slay the Spire is still the only Roguelike you'll ever need. I'll be replaying Slay the Princess when Pristine Cut comes out later this year so I'll throw that in here, that's an incredible horror visual novel, tons of branching paths, all voice acted to perfection. I'm in the middle of a Freedom Planet replay, so if you like classic 2D Sonic games this is a really good Soniclike

(Me from after I wrote all this) Oh yeah Hades II exists and I somehow forgot about it I have no idea how that happened. Yeah Supergiant (I always have to double check that in case I write Supermassive) always hits, every single one of their games is gold, Hades II continues that trend. It might still be Early Access but it quite comfortably surpasses release Hades I in content so I am incredibly excited to see how it grows.

Movies

Number 1 at my list is Godzilla Minus One, it's so good, I watched it last year, I watched it this year I'll probably watch it again in the Minus Colour version. I'm a Godzilla mark (I still have at least some objectivity Godzilla x Kong sitting at 12 hasn't even broken into my top 10, wait Oppenheimer isn't on here probably 13 then) and while I've definitely not even nearly seen of all Godzilla's filmography I think this is him comfortably at his best. As in all of his best films as a metaphor as well as a giant radioactive dinosaur.

I watched Rashomon the other day and it feels like a real basic thing to say but yeah Rashomon's really good, as with Catch-22 it's a classic for a reason. Not good enough to surpass a radioactive dinosaur apparently but what can?

And my number three on my list, Asteroid City, great framing device, great set design. Just a genuinely fascinating movie, had complete hold of my interest at all times.

The rest of my top ten in order The Banshees of Inisherin, Monster, Speed, The Menu, Happy Death Day, Scream, Scream 2 (Maybe Happy Death Day should be lower than the Screams actually) Oppenheimer is probably going to land somewhere in that top 10 as well.

TV

Delicious in Dungeon is good, everyone knows Delicious in Dungeon is good, everyone's watching it. World building, funny, great cast its all there, I should read the manga some time. I should definitely read more manga in general.

I've also watched The 8 Show, a Korean Drama show. Eight strangers are offered a chance to participate in a psuedo game show where they live on eight seperate floors and are paid money for the length of time the show goes on. The ones living on the lower floors earn less money and the ones on the higher ones earn more. (Shockingly it's a metaphor for capitalism). Things fairly rapidly degenerate. You'll obviously think of Squid Game watching this and its not as good as Squid Game but its still pretty good.

And obvs you know I'm still on that Buffy watch, on the cusp of finishing Series 6 of Buffy, the most frustrating so far in that it has some good ideas dragged down by a number of terrible decisions; magic becoming a metaphor for drugs, having to see those three nerds on screen frequently, that death etc etc.

Oh yeah I'm watching the Acolyte, I'm not gonna say its great but like its shockingly decent. Falls far short of Andor but aside from that its probably one of the best Star Wars shows they've made. If you like Star Wars this is one of the better shows to check out.

(Somehow I forgot I watched all of Hacks this year!?!?!?!) Great stuff, love those two. Hope they continue to be weird about each other forever.

Other

I'd love to rec a manga but I cantinue to only read two manga which are Hajime no Ippo and Jojo and they're both over 30 years old and still going and I cannot recommend something that long. Last time I mentioned Ippo was like at least six months ago I think I said it was slowly moving towards a conclusion it has moved no closer to a conclusion since then I think it's gonna be another decade. I still love it my favourite character is probably going to have his character arc finished by the end of the current arc, Mashiba's is going to become world champion, he is going to be respected rather than just feared, he's going to have friends, he is going to defeat the personification of the dirty boxing style that carried him through most of his career and he's going to stop being so overprotective over his sister. Either that or he'll get injured and have to retire from boxing forever in a karmic callback to his original sin in boxing when he broke Miyata's foot like thirtyodd years ago. Hopefully the first one.

[quaddmgd]

so doom I + II got a new release, which was unexpected but is very much welcome. the official 2019 rereleases were rather weak, especially compared to the work nightdive would do on id software games in the following years.

it looks like a great source port. like the 2019 release, it includes all expansion packs (along with sigil), features an optional ost remake by Andrew Hulshult, it has a mod support and most importantly it plays very well.

yeah, there are plenty of source ports, arguably offering even more, but it feels like for the first time these games got a deservedly great modern release that doesn't require tinkering to be enjoyed. my experience with 2019 releases quickly devolved into taking out .wad files and putting them in gzdoom.

what i really love is the return of id vault from quake 2's re-release. it's a great way to show off concept art, show off the assets and cut content. every remaster after quake 2 should have something like this. this is the definitive way to preserve the game's legacy and i'm beyond happy to see it return here.

i'm surely gonna play through the entire thing someday, but since i don't have much time (and i have personal issues with doom 2's level design and most of the expansion packs in general ;-;), i decided to focus on the new episode. i'm still playing through it, but it features some of the most tightly designed levels ever officially released. as it's the case for other machine games' expansion packs, they're designed to be fun first and foremost, they seem to never let you get lost, they're throwing around hundreds of enemies to dance around and slaughter your way through. new enemies are fun to fight, especially these doomboys running around with their plasma rifles. the midi soundtrack is great too.

the only major issue i have is a few random lag spikes i noticed while playing through the new episode. they don't happen often, but they're very noticeable. quake's rereleases also had weird performance woes for a while and i think this will get fixed eventually as well.

while i understand it might've been out of the scope of this project, i'd love to see them add the entire campaign from the ps1 doom eventually. its moody lighting mixed with Aubrey Hodges' iconic dark ambient ost make it my favorite way to experience doom.

ok time to go back playing ^^

[sl-newsie]

Carol Wars (Modern Mush Meyers x OC)

Summary: OC is determined to win at Christmas carol charades… maybe too much.

'It’s the most wonderful time of the year!'

The sound of another oncoming Christmas song makes me groan up at the ceiling. Why, oh why does Mush have to be in charge of choosing the music? Just because it’s his house doesn't mean he always gets to pick!

“You’re playing Christmas music again?” I complain.

Across the kitchen he gives me a deeply dramatic look. “It’s December, Gloria! It’s legal!”

“Yeah Mush but you’ve been playing it nonstop. Aren’t you tired of it by now?”

Mush stops icing cookies and his jaw drops. “How can you ever get tired of Christmas music? Back me up, Race!”

The man in question shrugs. “I’m with Gloria. You’ve got a problem.”

Mush rolls his eyes in defeat just as David walks in. “Davey?”

The bookworm looks between us with uncertainty, trying to resolve peace.

“I’m Jewish but I don’t mind listening to Christmas songs.”

Mush pumps his fist up. “Alright! So you can be the one to decide how we end this argument.”

Leave it to Mush to make everything into a debate. Can’t he just accept that too much of a good thing makes it less special? Even though he is dreamy… Especially in that cute green Christmas sweater.

Davey thinks for a second. “Um… You could do Christmas carol charades?”

Mush grins. “Perfect! Gloria, you go first. Race picks a Christmas song and Davey has to guess what it is. The one who scores the most gets to pick which music we listen to next.”

Interesting. It seems plausible. Granted, Mush has a much better vocabulary of Christmas carols than I do. But I can’t back down without a fight!

“Alright. That’s a fair game,” I grin viciously. “Prepare to lose, Mush! We’re about to start blasting out hard rock music!”

“Never!”

So the game begins! Race thinks for a while and leans over to whisper to me: “Rudolph.”

Piece-a cake!

I hold up my hands to my head, trying to show antlers. Davey’s eyes narrow in thought and he starts guessing.

“Head? Hat? Reindeer?”

I nod repeatedly and point to my ruby sweater and then to my nose.

“Red nose? Rudolph?”

“Yes!” I cheer and high-five with Race. “One point for me!”

“Just wait, Gloria!” Mush threatens as Race walks over to give him his own song.

The dreamboat’s brown eyes light up and he pulls a sour frown. Davey and I have to keep from laughing! Mush stubbornly keeps his grouchy face on and points to his heart.

“The Grinch!” Davey guesses through laughter.

“Right on!” Mush grins and claps me on the back. “You’re up, sweetheart!”

Sweetheart. Mush says it so nonchalantly but I can’t ignore Race’s teasing smirk as he leans in again.

“I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus,” he whispers deviously.

I glare daggers at his cheeky face. He knows exactly how I’ll act this one out. Gee, thanks Race. It’s not enough that he knows about my feelings for Mush but now he has to embarrass me even more! But I can’t let Mush win!

I kneel down and pull on the act of looking like a small child. Wide eyes, gaping mouth. Davey already recognizes that I’m imitating Les.

“A small child?”

I hold up a finger to make him stop and march straight to Mush. Before he can ask and before I can back out, I grip his sweater and pull him into a stiff kiss. It feels so nice... Oh, if only it were real. I’ve wanted to tell him for years but don't want to spoil our friendship. Well, too late now! I am going to win!

I finally pull back to stare at Mush’s speechless face. He must think I’m a twisted joke. Race, on the other hand, ignores the tension and starts trying to hold back a fit of chuckles.

“Wow! You actually kissed him! I didn’t think you had the guts.”

Davey awkwardly clears his throat and says: “I saw mommy kissing Santa Claus?”

I nod shakily and move away from Mush, who’s still staring at me. “I win.”

Race shrugs. “Technically it’s a tie but-”

“I win,” I repeat sternly and pivot to walk off into the living room.

Game’s over. End of story. I just had to kiss my best friend to win a game of charades. I deserve the win. Now Christmas is probably going to be weird and I shouldn’t stick around for it. Maybe I should go home early-?

“Knock knock?”

Mush’s soft voice makes me tense up again and I freeze midstep. Curse my stubborn pride! I just had to get over-competitive! Now Mush is gonna taunt me in front of everybody-

“That felt like more than just a nonsense kiss.”

No kidding! That’s because it wasn’t, even though it was supposed to be! And it- Why is he looking at me like that?

“Yeah, about that, um…” I bite my lip and try to discreetly sneak back. “I enjoyed it more than I thought I would.”

In the corner of my eye Mush gets closer and reaches down to lift my chin up. If I weren’t so flustered the sight of his chocolate eyes would be very delightful.

“Me too,” he murmurs gently. Huh? “Can we try it again?”

My brow scrunches. “The kiss or the charades?”

A smile spreads over his adorable face. “Both. I need a rematch.”

In the blink of an eye Mush leans down and captures my lips with his again. But this time we both know it’s real. Not just for a silly game. It’s as if something else has been added to our friendship. Not something that’s spoiling it. If anything, Mush is very encouraging.

“Best Christmas gift ever,” he grins when he pulls back. “You have no clue how long I’ve wanted to do that.”

I shake my head and can’t stop smiling. “You can play any music you want, Mush.”

He pretends to think. “How about All I Want For Christmas is Y-?”

I shove a hand over his cute mouth. “I swear if you pick that overplayed song I’m going to-!”

“What? Kiss me again?” Mush asks excitedly. “Sounds good to me!”

He bends me over for a deeper kiss and I swear he’s trying to squeeze me to death. I should have spoken up a long time ago-

“They’re kissing again!”

Mush and I both tense up and whip out heads around to look at Race, who’s grinning mischievously. He gives us the thumbs-up and dashes back down the hall.

“Albert, you owe me ten bucks!”

We look back at each other and shrug, leaning in for another kiss as Santa Baby starts blaring from the kitchen.

[spinningbuster98]

Sonic the Hedgehog CD Part 1: Sonic CD is sponsored by Marty McFly

Oh boy, now we’re getting into some spicy territory!

My history with CD is...complicated

Unlike the other Classic titles, while I was exposed to this one at around that same time thanks to the Sonic Gems Collection, I never played it quite as much due to...reasons that will become quite clear in future parts. It’s only with the release of the Whitehead version years ago that I truly dived into this game

So let’s start with the best and most obvious parts

Firstly: the opening and closing cinematics are literally some of my favorite pieces of animation ever. (Well the uncompressed versions anyway, ‘cause the Sega CD was what it was). Not just because they’re animated beautifully but because they feature what is, to me, the gold standard of Sonic’s body language.

This Sonic is quick, adventurous and fun loving when he’s zooming around, but dead serious and determined once he notices Eggman’s effect on Little Planet

But most of all: he’s cool. He’s effortlessly cool in the way he runs around and toys with badniks, while at the same time still retaining a cutesy side to him to remind you that this is still a light hearted and fun loving cartoon character

While I’m not one of those people who thinks that Sonic should never talk (specifically Classic), there is a case to be made on how in just a few minutes’ worth of animation CD is able to tell us literally everything there is to know about Sonic’s character without having him utter a single word while the Storybook games had to devote hours long narratives to get the point across. It also further lampshades just how backwards Sega’s recent handling of Classic as a character has been, focusing completely on his cutesy side while completely neglecting his cooler one, or at least downplaying it, while one of the main reasons for the switch to Modern was because they feared that Classic was being perceived as too cute by fans at the time, but whatever that’s a topic for another time

From a graphical standpoint...yeah this game is above and beyond the best of the classics, both in general spritework (though bosses in Sonic 3 actually look better, but that might just be due to that game having actual bosses that look more imposing in general), color variation, level of detail and artstyle, which is without even mentioning the way that the game manages to tell a simple yet subtle narrative through its backgrounds but I’ll focus on that at a later time

But personally I’ve...actually never been head over heels for these graphics unlike everyone else, mostly due to a personal thing, since Sonic game move so quickly it’s usually hard for me to really focus on background details and whatnot, which isn’t helped by the one thing you’ll be looking at the most, Sonic’s sprite, pretty much being ripped straight from Sonic 1 and looking so out of place compared to the rest of the game. But again: it’s not a knock against the game, it’s just me

Musically I...think it’s good, it’s certainly the most varied and smartly utilised soundtrack in the Classic games (or even in the whole series) due to how each track ties very well to the feel of not only each Zone but also each era, but personally? When it comes to Sonic music I tend to prefer more upbeat, fast paced tracks. CD’s OST is much slower and usually pretty calming and atmospheric, which works very well for what it’s trying to accomplish, it’s just not what I personally prefer to hear in a Sonic game (and yeah I’m talking about the JPN score, it’s been ages since I’ve listened to the US tracks)

On the other hand however I like all of the vocal tracks

Sonic Boom was the first I was introduced to and it still sounds great, but over time I also gained a lot of appreciation for You can do anything. The lyrics are really cheesy and are bordering on nonesense half the time, but I like the energy it has

My absolute favorite however is Cosmic Eternity. I really wish more people would talk about this one because this is, and I’m not kidding here, one of my favorite Sonic songs in general. Right up there with the likes of Open your Heart, Live and Learn and What I’m Made of. It’s just so upbeat and uplifting, it fits both this game’s happier aspects and Sonic’s character like a glove, the latter more in the sense that it sounds like something that Sonic would sing someone to cheer them up

[ohwyrd]

What did you think of the uni 2 arcade mode routes?

Hello I return after playing the uni 2 arcade mode routes.

take under cut

I hate them <3. World's most disappointing conclusion after a 4 year wait since the previous game and this isn't even just because there isn't a dedicated story mode . Ok now I will elaborate further.

Obviously I am not expecting a full story since they retired Chronicle mode entirely, and as a frame of reference I enjoy arcade mode story! I play kof games through arcade over and over to get story parts because I Like them and I enjoy seeing the perspective of different characters across the whole game. All this to say the story mode being put inside arcade mode is not the issue to me.

The part I hate is that the continuity in which every character starts is different and doesn't even clearly carry on from their route in the previous game or something, it's just a totally separate context given to you in their character blurb on the select screen. We don't even know where Kuon came from or what his grand plan was aside from comically "I going to destroy da universe with voids" there is no actual story aside from "Yeah we need a big boss villain character and the player character to go beat them to death for hero reasons". There isn't any actual reason for your mid-game fights, you just get a corny line of dialogue like "Oouuhgh I have to test you to see if you can fight Kuon for real" or "You're sooo stupid and I want to fight so bad we have beef now for no reason". It does not get any better and we do not get any actual motivations or character development from anyone, which I guess is a joke on me for maybe wanting any form of development in my silly visual novel fighting game characters.

Still, I spent a while trying to play through all of them so I could piece together the order of events to understand what happened in universe in Some way and I could not even make it through all of them because they read like shit, which brings me to my second point of

The translation is so ass. I don't know who they got to do the translation, but it reads like early Blazblue TLs with the characterization from crosstag. Which is fine in that game because everything is non canon and I don't care if they want to reduce the character to funny characteristic joke that sounds better in dub, but it sucks ass in a mainline story game where I'm actually trying to pay attention to what the character would have said according to the actual dialogue track, and I care way less about the "localization" or modernization of what they said. Months ago I was making a joke with @scharfkugel about the shitty TLs from crosstag and what it would be like if they were in uni 2 and it's genuinely funny how some of the lines have this exact vibe

including the funniest receipt I have. Feels like we really put the last nail in the coffin for uni's story with this one

Anyway.

I'm not making this post to rain on anybody's parade because I know the whole unib fanbase was waiting for very long for a new game without any expectations, I didn't have any until I paid triple A pricing in my region for this damn video game that didn't have functioning online on release and also did not give me a good singleplayer experience. If you enjoy the uni2 arcade modes, more power to you I'm glad you do but personally I can't believe the game released with these lol. legitimately reads like a joke

[popculturebuffet]

Little Retrospective of Horrors: Little Shop: Bad Seed: That's Not a Joke that's the actual episode title (Comission by WeirdKev27)

Well here we are friends, at the end of my look of little shop of horrors. I may return for the comic adaptations of the films one day, but for now.. there's one last strange and intresting plant to cover before we close shop and count the bodies. Intresting may be pushing it i'll admit but it IS strange, so at least it has that.

Little Shop is a 1991 cartoon based on the musical and film, which mashes together the 60's do-wop themes of the musical, peanuts and Rap into one series.

Yeah THIS happened. I knew about it for a long time but hadn't seen hide nor hair of it till a reviewer I used to watch covered it. What clips I saw really didn't inspire confidence. However Kev loves to watch me suffer and coudln't wait for me to cover this whenever I could, so he paid me money to watch this thing.

So I decided to give the series a fair shake, look at the first episode. And i'm glad he did in the long run as it DOES feel more complete having this series in the retrospective. My soul will never entirely heal but hey, that's the price you pay sometime in this line of work. So join me under the cut as I talk about an Audrey Junior that raps. If that didn't scare you off, join me won't you?

We begin little shop with the theme song. And credit where it's due.. the hook for it is fire.

It's a weird sandwitch of a song where the begining and end are great, a nice 90's style rnb hit. Problem is like many a 90's work they drop a piss take rap in the middle with lines like "get ready for a funny bone overload" "I'm comin atcha like toon style" "In full effect" and "the little shop posse's gaining respect"

Look if you don't know how something works don't do it. It's why i stay far away from tik tok and why Little Shop shouldn't of tried to enter the rap game.

This decision.. will never not be hilarious. Eldrictch God Levels of maddening too, of course, but hilarious. See... you'd THINk from this decision Little Shop abandons the Do-Wop, 60's pop sound of the musical entirely. You'd THINK. Instead they have numbers in that style AND rap numbers with Junior that make Poochie look dignified. So the writers clearly GOT that the music was one of the most valuable, iconic and awesome parts of the movie and stage play.. but also failed to grasp that it clashed horribly with rap. Or execs did. Or roger Corman

And the 60's style is still present for the most part as in their next baffling decision, they decided the best thing to possibly pair with little shop of horrors.. was peanuts

Now this isn't something I've really had a chance to dig into on this blog.. but I absolutely LOVE peanuts. The specials, the films, and of course the comic that started it all. As my frequent use of Breaking Cat News and Bloom County panels shows I love me a good comic strip and I love the godfather of most modern comic strips. If it didn't come from peanuts it came from Bloom County or Calvin and Hobbes, which came from peanuts.

So I actually do understand the impulse to model little shop's style after peanuts: it's a classic style, it has roots in the 60's as the specials started there and A Charlie Brown Christmas is still played every christmas as gods intended, and it works well. And they do a good job styliistically: it's peanuts esque but has it's own unique style and I like the minmalist yet colorful backgrounds. it really pops and the show LOOKS good, even through the vhs rip I watched.

The big issue is that they go for the peanuts style.. but often don't actually match that tone. The start of the episode kind of does, Seymour is charlie brown now, talks about his bad luck, not being "smart" enough to be a nerd, and his constant bullying by Pain Driller

Our DENNNTTIIIIST. The problem is LIttle Shop goes for a zanier universe. And it's not that Peanut's universe couldn't be rediculous. We've had things like Peppermint Patty being out of school for several weeks going to a dog obdience school thinking it was private school, Snoopy walking all the way to Kansas City when trying to get to Wimbledon and reuniting with his sister, Snoopy's awkward teenage nephew

The Kite Eating Tree which is not Charlie Brown's imagination, the EPA trying to arrest charlie brown for biting the bastard tree, Charlie Brown having to wear a sack over his head due to a baseball shaped rash... Charles Schultz wasn't above getting weird with it, and I'm here for it. Weird peanuts is some of the best peanuts.

The diffrence is peanuts is more.. chill. There will be big events and weird shit but it has a relaxed tone. Even something as awful as Lucy throwing Linus out of the house... was mostly just Linus chilling with Joe cool at his dorm and their parents having not intervened because they were missing... and the reveal of WHY gives Lucy her commpuance in the best way possible.

It's a fairly relaxed strip. There can be tense arcs and weird shit, but generally the stakes are just a setup for jokes or character work. So throwing a magical talking rappin plant into that kind of tone dosen't work. I get the impulse as the originla flim was also kinda relaxed.. at first. But it's hard to make "Carnvrious talking plant" work with "chill and relaxed"... so why do it? Why not just have them as teens at least? why? why/ Why?

So we find out Seymour has a job at Mushnik's still because Child Labor dosen't exist in this universe and is still yelled at by him because Mushnik uses child labor you think he's above YELLING at his free child labor? Seymour, as you'd expect, has a crush on Audrey whose mushnik's daughter in this one so she has a reason to be around. In a series where almost none of the changes make sense, why is THIS the one that does?

She ignores seymour because she wants to be a fire fighter

She apparently has a diffrent new passion every episode, like Daphne from Be Cool Scooby Doo but not as endearing. Seymour can't get her to notice him, and unlike the previous two versions she dosen't SEEM to have a thing for him back.

So Seymour needs to turn his life around and as usual finds a strange and intresting plant.. or rather it's seed as that's how Little Shop thinks plant dormancy works. Granted i'm not a botanist, but one google tells me that's not how it works. A plant simply stops growing and strengthens it's roots and what not to survive. So the IDEA of how Twoey isn't fozilied depsite, as we'll find out, being from caveman times, isn't bad.

This leads to our first musical number as Seymour tries to raise Audrey Junior to impress Audrey who in this version is a jerk about it while Mr Mushnik talks about his bad luck as does Seymour and no one cares because Seymour is a blatant copy of a way more popular characte rinstead of a kidified version of rick moranis and Mushnik reguarlly bullys a child.

So while we saw Seymour's mom earlier, he's sleeping at the shop. Apparently Mushnik bought him for a wadded up five and a slim fit condom. He dreams of caveman times, and Audrey Junior, who orders himself a pizza. Because apparently having a childrens show about Rambo, Warrior for Piece is okay but you can't sell one about a plant murdering a child's enemies.

So instead Junior just eats a lot. Anyways Pain is the delivery boy because child labor laws can go fuck themselves in this universe, and plans to rob seymour. So instead of being a murderous manipulative monster Twoey.. is just an asshole. Or dosen't know how money works.

Twoey does as usual offer some quid pro quo: Seymour tkaes him home later,a nd Twoey gets Audrey to notice he's alive. He agrees. Mushnik plans to fire the child he shoudln't of hired, while Twoey needs to hold up his end. So he decides to plant the idea in Audrey's head that seymour's cool, by literally pulling a seed out of the plant equilvent for a butt. His aim is lousy though so he hits pain instead.

This works to their advantage though as it allows them to steal his dope ass moped. Unfortunatley Junior finds that his home.. is now a petrified forest. And we get the one joke that actually made me laugh "Petrified Forest, please stay off the petrified grass". And I'll give them credit, Juniors sadness over his family being gone and being stuck in an urban hellscape is great.

The problem is that Junior.. lacks anything that made his predecessor Twoey or his grandpa also junor work. The original junior was just a mindless plant that Seymour was stupid enough to get hooked on corpses. The film version was a creepy trickster who manipulated Seymour ot his ends. A comedic twoey COULD actually work: keep the big eater thing and simply have him manpiulate seymour to his own ends. IT's not as good, but it'd work for what hteir goin for here. Instead while they try that, what we've got is a character whose just a selfish asshole with no trickstery charm and whose also a walking fossil of the 90's instead of the jurassic.

Still as is law Junior DOES help. In trying to lead a plant rebellion against humanity, he instead just makes all the flowers grow. Seymour accidently floods the place trying to stop him, which gets Audrey's intrest thinking he was fire fighting. I'm too tired to think of the logic here. Mushnik is happy to not fire him as long as their's buisness so we have our setup: Junior decides to adjust to modern day, Seymour keeps him because it benefits him, Audrey actuallyt alks to seymour now and Mushnik is taking advantage of a small child

Little Shop.. isn't very good. You'd THINK tha't dbe inherent in "Little Shop of Horrors Cartoon for Children'.. but the idea of one ISN'T as bonkers as it sounds. Little Shop of Horrors.. works for kids as while there's defintely a lot of muder and violence, most of it is pretty subdued. Only the feeding scene from the film really has a lot of gore to it. So as "selling this to children" properties goes, the film with a big awesome puppet, catchy songs, and a happy ending that also has mutilations and spousal abuse.. isn't the wildest swing you could take.

And adapting it for kids.. is really easy. As I said, just have Audrey II be a selfish trickster ala zack morris, doing things for his own benefit. Which they have here, just with an annoying rap gimmick. You age up the characters to high school, take away the unecessary attempts to copy peanuts, and it works. The franchise is already goofy, and while done well serious enoguh, even th efilm and musical still have wacky shit like Orin's entire musical number. The premise is goofy enough to work as a goofy over the top comedy, you just gotta let it. Little Shop ultimately dosen't work because it dose'nt know what it wants to be, mixing peanuts with a magical sidekick, rap and musical numbers more along the line of the original. It dosen't know what it is and that's why it only lasted 13 episodes.

Will I revisit this series? probably. It's pretty nuts and while I don't LIKE it, it was riffable as all hell. And it does sound like it gets more and more bonkers as it goes. For now though the shop is closed, but i was happy to finally give the full breadth of the franchise a looksee. It was certainly strange and intresting.

[wirewitchviolet]

The Trouble With Dying in Horror Games

So as you could probably guess after posting a week ago that I'd just played most of the way through SOMA and planned to finish it today, I just did so. It's an excellent game, I'd highly recommend it, and I'd particularly like to sing its praises for mostly delivering on the horror end by throwing a lot of heady philosophical questions at you while forcing you to actually pay attention to everything going on, because you absolutely are not given any sort of map, compass, or current objective tracker. The one aspect of it that didn't so much click for me though was the monsters, and I'd like to share some thoughts on why, and how this is honestly one of the trickiest needles to thread in game design.

So the thing about horror games is that you want the player to feel, if not actually scared, a certain amount of tension, unease, disquiet, dread, etc. You don't want to keep that feeling mounting for the entirety of the game of course, you want to build build build build but then and release now and then, give a breather, and start building it up again. And while there ARE other ways of doing that (and again, the game that got me thinking about this is pretty good at making you stress over, frankly, roleplaying decisions), the most obvious and probably the most effective is making the player stress out over some sort of fail state, or as we call it in game design circles, death.

Problem is, dying releases tension.

This applies to any game really. When things are getting rough and it seems like you're about to die, yeah that's some great heart pounding high tension stuff, but then you miss that timer or take that hit or flub that dropped block or whatever and you're snapped back to the reality that oh right, this is just a game, and now you just have to try what you were doing again. And that's nice in a lot of situations, but in a horror game it's pretty much always going to throw things off because there is, again, this very particular sort of timing you want in the building and release and that early release can really screw with it. And generally, because really this is just how games work, you need to decide how far you want to roll the player's progress back to get back into that right rhythm.

Now personally, I'm a big fan of the golden age of horror games. Stuff from the earliest disc based systems, where not only are save points few and far between, but there's limitations on how many times you can save your game at all. Death had a hell of a lot more sting to it as a threat with games like that, and it also played super well with the first couple Resident Evil games and the way they make you sweat over all your resources in the long term by slow-drip-feeding you ammo and healing items into your very limited inventory. Now the downside to this of course is that you WILL, in all likelihood, die at some point where you have gone Some Time without saving, and while that leaves a good runway to reestablish the tension it's also, you know, super frustrating and you'll maybe want to step away from the game for a while to cool off.

Modern games though, with few exceptions, do not do save points anymore. They have fallen completely out of fashion, and the modern expectation is that every game will constantly be autosaving at very closely packed checkpoints, which is generally considered an evolution of the kindness of letting you save anywhere at any time, probably with zippy quick-save and quick-load buttons, which have kind of been back-ported to older games thanks to emulation and... honestly personally I hate this and that's a rant for another time, but I acknowledge that I am in the minority there. HOWEVER, this still really sucks for horror because we now have the tension break of death, with little to no sting following it, and we're then right back where we were, with no time for the tension to remount at all, and then whatever you died to is just an annoyance, especially if it happens again.

Now, SOMA is as much of a modern horror game as you can get. Like, you tell me something is a "modern horror" game, I'm immediately going to picture something with more or less this gameplay and frankly, something from this developer or someone trying to be like them, and sure enough, if you die you lose absolutely no progress at all. The checkpointing is so generous I swear I've actually MADE progress when dying, and it really hurts the ability for deadly things (by which I pretty much just mean monsters) to have the sort of impact they need. Which is a shame, because these are some pretty neat monsters! Every new one you encounter has a very distinct look and, in theory, a different rule you need to work out in order to avoid being killed. Here's one you need to keep from seeing you, one you need to avoid looking at, one you can't break eye contact with, one that won't kill you if you're perfectly still, etc. And that's neat.

But... I say "in theory" because I absolutely DID get through the game without figuring out the deal with half of them. Either I just booked it before they could reach me (which is great, actually, that keeps the tension if it feels like you're just barely staying ahead) or I just... ate the deaths which didn't even change my position but kicked the monster further down the hall. Which... yeah, nobody's happy with that.

Now, here I should point out that in this particular game this really isn't much of a problem at all because SOMA has like... 8 monsters total, give or take? It has much more cerebral ways to get under your skin, to the point where a lot of people say it'd be better not having monsters at all (and there's even an option to play it that way). I disagree though. They're fun designs, they have interesting patterns, and from both a perspective of story pacing and world building, it's quite important that we at least occasionally have some twisted monstrosities that may once have been human shuffling about in a menacing fashion. We just don't want the tension totally destroyed when they succeed in that menacing.

So how could we fix that? Well my go-to answer is "quit doing constant checkpointing, make me lose real progress so the stakes feel high and I'm really incentivized to work out the safe way past," and for a LOT of games, yeah, just do that. Here though, it's tricky, because a big part of why this game works as well as it does is that it's a bit mazey in its design with zero handholding, it doesn't have you collecting stuff, and aside from some chasey bits which are, again, great, there's no combat or action scenes really. You spend a lot of time stumbling around clueless and confused, picking up cool bits of world-building lore and familiarizing yourself with your surroundings enough to properly orient yourself and work out the path forward. If you die in the middle of that and get sent way back to the start of the area, you're not going to retrace those steps. You've seen those files you've worked out that mental map, you're going to get right back to where you were now, but now that monster is an annoyance not a threat.

So OK, if we can't restore tension after a death without sacrificing good stuff, what if we just avoid dying in the first place? I mean, that IS the ideal, really. You want to constantly be worried you're about to die, and then never have it happen. Tension builds constantly and only gets released when the designers want it released. This is tricky to accomplish though. You can literally just not put anything in that's actually going to lead to a death. Monsters that come charging and screaming up corridors but never reach you because a door slams shut or a walkway collapses or whatever, but that's a huge gamble because if the player notices even once that they weren't really in any danger, they now know death isn't a thing in this game, and the threat of it can no longer establish tension. The more fake-outs you do, the more likely they are to see behind that curtain.

OK, so, how about the monsters DO have the ability to kill you, but they rarely if ever will if you approach them smartly? This could work. Again, in our case in point, there's some trick to every monster, and if you know the trick, and can execute it, you're safe from that monster. It's still tense if there's some chance you might not use the survival strategy properly, we can still ratchet things up in a hurry by taking away the means to do what you need to at the climax of a given monster encounter, so things are still plenty tense, but the player has to be fairly incompetent to get killed, and hopefully they'll learn from it for the next attempt but be iffy on that. I do feel like this would work for SOMA and going in with outside knowledge of what does/doesn't cause each given thing in the game to come charging at you so that death is possible but rare would be ideal, BUT again the whole nature of this particular game not holding your hand and rewarding thorough exploration only with more details about exactly what the heck is going on and really pushing for isolation eliminates the easiest ways to clue that in-game. Unless of course it was dropping hints with the whole corpse black box recording deal and I was just too personally distracted to pick up on it. Again though, I'm just using this game as an example to discuss this in the abstract.

How about this though? What if we took dying to the same thing twice out of the equation? If this particular monster in this particular hallway kills you, you return to the last checkpoint, but when you get back to that hallway, the monster isn't there anymore. There's a risk of players treating this as an alternate solution to the problem of dealing with monsters and just face-tanking through the whole game, but you could mess with people's heads with it. If that monster isn't here, then where is it? Why isn't it here? Do we have diegetic respawns? Is the monster not here because it's off eating the corpse of the previous version of me? This feels like it's worth exploring.

Here's another one for you. Have softer fail states. SOMA actually does a bit of this in fact. When you die, sure, you get back up pretty much where you were standing, and it almost or literally does feel like monsters aren't so much trying to kill you as just giving you a big ol' bonk on the head as they pass, but it screws with your vision, and sometimes your ability to walk straight. I'm not going to lose progress from a death, but I am going to have a bad time if I get caught. That can work really well, and hell, in SOMA I took a lot of hits where I'm actually unclear if I just screwed up and got knocked out, or if we were just punctuating the end of a scene with me getting taken off guard and cold-cocked in cinematic fashion. There's a lot of ways you can play with this design space too. Maybe you get dragged off somewhere if you get jumped and have to work out where you even are when you wake up. Maybe you drop plot items when you get taken down like this, and have to track those back down when you're back on your feet (just, if you do this, be sure to make it a fail-forward sort of thing where you're just on a different path for a bit and people don't have to just do repetitive runs fishing keycards out of the sewer every time they get smacked by the monster they're stuck on or something).

How about some more variations on this? Every time something should kill you, fate gets altered by the weird artifact you're carrying. Maybe this is just fancy fluff for HP, or it's like the Gamecube Resident Evil Remake's survival items. Maybe sidekicks take the hits for you but then die forever, like Hellnight. Maybe you live but with a permanent injury (this is an idea I personally plan on taking somewhere when I get the time). So long as the player keeps moving forward after, these can all be really impactful partial fail states that don't break tension.

Anyway, this is all just stuff to consider if you ever end up designing a horror game... or just a game in general. But anyway, SOMA's great, definitely worth checking out.

Anyway if you'd like to seem me keep rambling about things, I honestly quite desperately need money to live, my patreon donations fell off a damn cliff this month. And if you want to see me stream more, OK, I'm going to try to make that a regular thing, monday nights, 8 PM.