#idk ... but
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A REVOLUTIONARY OR A CRIMINAL?
#red dead redemption 2#rdr2#red dead redemption#javier escuella#rdr#rdr2 fanart#fanart#painting#do you still remember who you were?#Idk but
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Something I was thinking about lately is Tsuna's daddy issues. Specifically this frame.
Like that's such a loaded thing to think about. He's got so much resentment built up. Obviously, there's no direct connection to any of Tsuna's issues made but I think a few fun things can be said from this. In general, Tsuna clearly didn't have a father figure in his life which sorta results in him leaning on Reborn pretty often. Tsuna doesn't have a very stable self-esteem with him going from confident to "Aah, Gokuderas going to become disillusioned with me now that all my flaws have been pointed out." GOKUDERA. His FIRST SUBORDINATE. The guy who literally has been LOYAL FROM DAY ONE. Not that we consider them canon, but this happens also during the filler arcs where Daemon points out that Tsuna's not worth following to Gokudera and it seems to make Tsuna a little antsy. He DOES NOT THINK THE PEOPLE HE LOVES ARE GOING TO STAY WITH HIM, THIS IS LITERALLY RUINING MY LIFE. What Daddy Issues DO TO A MF. But that's a post for another day. But okay, back to Reborn, Reborn proves himself to be immovable from Tsuna's life. The story points out that Tsuna very much has two fathers. The one who won't leave and the one who is always gone. Tsuna really leans on Reborn throughout the series. "Reborn, what do I do?" Is a common thing he says, until Reborn is literally swept away from him against his will in Future arc where he's forced to think that he's half a person in Reborns absence. Meanwhile, we have Iemitsu who Tsuna has resentment built up towards, does not respect, and is forced to acknowledge in order to win his fight. Throughout the rainbow arc battle, they try to point out that Iemitsu is trying to teach Tsuna something here and unless I'm confused (someone feel free to tell me?) it's not really clear WHAT that is. And I've always thought that was neat, because it's obviously coming from Tsuna's inability to respect Iemitsu enough to want to learn anything from him. Yet when Reborn comes in, hell he doesn't even recognize him in his Adult form, but he politely listens and takes his advice seriously. In the grand scheme of the series, Reborn is a good teacher and father figure in his life. When Tsuna is made to feel like that he can't do anything in Reborn's absence during Future, Reborn takes a step back in that arc and lets him learn to survive without his guidance. (Notice how the training almost entirely disappears after Future.) He lets him learn how to be a person without him, only stepping in to help when Tsuna really needs it. When he's unable to light his flame, with Spanner, or when he's freaking out about the Irie reveal, the list really goes on. There's a scene I recall I believe when Yuni asks to join their group, Tsuna still turns to ask Reborn what to do, and Reborn redirects him by asking him what he wants to do. That it was his call as a boss. And Tsuna ends up making the decision to help her off his own accord.
It's with Reborn's guidance that Tsuna ends up learning to be his own person, it's this guidance that allows him to make the decision and gather everyone on his own accord when it was Reborn's turn to be shaky and give up. Where Tsuna tells him that he's got this under control, without his guidance. To just watch him. "you've always knew I could win before." It's this arc where Reborn's pride in Tsuna shines. Multiple times. "Surprise me again, Tsuna." And he does. It's in Reborn's second absence where Tsuna feels himself get shaky again, feels the old feelings of poor self image crop up, that Reborn comes back. Because Reborn is not Iemitsu, and he wasn't someone who left him in that house alone forever. Because he's still young and has much to learn before he's ready to do this on his own. It's at this he feels a little embarrassed about how glad he is that Reborn came back, but then recalls the "mean words" that Reborn said before leaving. It's here that Reborn tells him it's a good thing he hasn't changed much. Another sliver of guidance that Tsuna takes in from the figure in his life that won't leave him alone in that house.
#katekyo hitman reborn#khr#sawada tsunayoshi#r27#platonic?#familial?#idk but#i was having feelings about those two#when i remembered that panel#thank you for reading my messy lil ramblings#<3
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trying to beat the loser allegations meanwhile im sitting on the ground outside the exit of my school literally crying anyways here take this
#mcr#gerard way#would this count as party poison#idk but#party poison#drawing#my chemical romance#art#emo#mcr art#danger days mcr#danger days
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#miraculous ladybug#mlb fanart#mlb special#claw noir#mlb spoilers#ladybug and chat noir#ml paris special#adrien agreste#chat noir#idk but#he kinda#sketch#fanart
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*lies awake at night and has an idea*
[Its 4 a.m. by the way.]
Other Worldly
Prologue
Alastor X Shy Reader
(Oneshot turned short story)
Warnings? ⚠
⚠ selectively mute reader, mentions of death-drowning, shaking head = no, signing-ASL ⚠
They were an oddity.
How could such a meek and bashful thing like them end up in this fiery inferno.
Alastor watched from the bar as they bumped into the check-in counter and squeaked before getting off balance and falling.
Clumsy, jumpy, barely making a sound other than some odd squeaks.
Yes, they were quite the wonder.
An entertaining one.
❇
You were somewhat new to Hell. At least two weeks in.
There was an accident where you worked in the aquarium and well..you kinda caused a mass drowning? It sounds impossible but it happened.
It was very challenging to get up after your fall, but you managed and wound up at the hotel.
With the help of the Princess, you were able to figure out what kind of demon you are. It came with pros but it also came with cons. One con being that you couldn't speak unless you wanted to hypnotize someone.
It made you a little sad, but also relieved. You didn't do well around others, too shy to speak up or get involved with anything that put you in the spotlight.
Maybe it was for the best.
There would be one thing you wouldn't give up though.
❇
Alastor was in the hotel's library.
There wasn't a whole lot of demons coming into this room, especially after some guests saw him walk in here a few times.
It didn't matter. At least there were multiple things that could entertain him. A small music room with instruments, projectors in another with film reels and other types of tapes, and the most dazzling room of all was the astronomy room.
The Princess made sure to have this room's dome ceiling painted with an accurate mural of the Earth's night sky.
Deciding to mess with the trinkets on the shelves, the demon in red walked towards the back of the room and glanced at the star charts. Tapping at some of the books and measuring tools on the desk nearby before sitting down on a chair.
No one ventured this far into the library. He was probably the only demon who knew of this room's existence.
And then he heard something.
Someone had entered the room.
Turning around and looking between the shelves, Alastor spots the timid demon that he enjoys flustering so much near the armillary sphere in the middle.
A little spook wouldn't be too bad.
He thought with a small grin, starting to summon up a shadow creature. However both dissipated when there was a note sung into the air.
"Let's go in the garden
You'll find something waiting
Right there where you left it lying upside down
When you finally find it, you'll see how its faded
The underside is lighter when you turn it around "
The Radio Demon sat there, mouth agape as they sang.
"Everything stays right where you left it
Everything stays
But it still changes
Ever so slightly, daily and nightly
In little ways, when everything stays "
Like a siren- a water sprite? A nymph? It was hard to pinpoint what he could compare their voice to.
It was other worldly.
Their voice echoed due to the room's acoustics.
He didn't notice that he had gotten out of the chair, didn't notice he was making his way towards them, didn't notice when they stopped singing until they gasped.
Blinking out of his trance, he found them facing him and covering their mouth with their hands. A panicked look in their eyes.
"You stopped.", Alastor spoke up. "Why not finish?"
They shook their head quickly and backed away.
Before he could say something else, they moved their arms down, one made into a fist on their chest and moving in a circle clockwise. Then they ran out. (Sorry)
He stood there for a while, his smile widening. Maybe there was more to them than he thought.
How interesting~
I'm still on break but I couldn't help myself with this one. 🐚 (Old note)
~Seline, the person.
Part 1
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Alastor ML I🎙 | ChL OW🦀
#x reader#gn reader#alastor#alastor hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel alastor#hazbin alastor#alastor the radio demon#fanfic#alastor x reader#the radio demon#selectively mute reader#selectively mute#the radio demon alastor#radio demon#shy reader#mic tap tap#song lyrics#everything stays-olivia olson#lyrics#mermaid reader#siren reader#both?#idk but#✨😮✨ merfolk#i love mermaids#hold on give me a sec#aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh#ok im good
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Everyone in WxS has had a crush on Tsukasa at some point, first Emu, then Rui, then (to her horror) Nene. Tsukasa is 100% oblivious to this fact.
sorry to break my rule of . but SHUDSHTAHGSYSJHGFZHSJSJSRTBTSRYKJXHFDLDHTLSYEKREOYRDGZYKSEYFTLRDTUXLFUEYOESYDLRLDURLDYKYRSKRYSXFHBFWHAREBGSHDJFUOTUVKATO
#pjsk#prsk#project sekai#headcanon#tsukasa tenma#emu otori#rui kamishiro#nene kusanagi#tsukasa hc#emu hc#rui hc#nene hc#polysho hc#?#idk but#haha#maybe an#AROACE polyshow hc???#im funny right#i#im sorry#the orange loud dude attracts theater kids and theater kids only
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I LOVE HIM SO MUCH😭😭😭😭😭😭
#💙! mah rambles#JADEEEEEE#SOBS#HIS BEANIEODKEKEJEKDJD#IT'S CROCHET??? OR KNIT?????#IDK BUT#SO CUTE#AND THE WAY HIS HAIR IS BEHIND HIS EAR I CAN'T DO THIS#I NEED THIS CARD#HE'S SO CUTE
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OK GUYS. Not. Not to sound tooo crack shippy. BUT.
But.
Ok. But…
Why is Larry x Phoenix kinda… Cute?
#ace attorney#I’m so sorry#BUT#it’s kinda cute#like#idk but#it is??#Phoenix wright#Larry Butz#aa#Phoenix wright ace attorney#DO NOT JUDGE ME#it’s just#really cute?#Larry Butz x Phoenix weight#ok do they have a ship name#butzwright#bro that’s soooo stupid#Larry x Phoenix
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Guys I literally JUST realized a thing about my autism/masking/alexithymia. I noticed there was an alexithymia tag here on tumblr and when I investigated, there was this one post listing these symptoms:
and I just--
I've had these exact, MAJOR struggles through my whole life for one.
But for two, and what's really interesting in my opinion...
Yesterday, I was having a video call with my mom. I've been off of some medications that I'm supposed to be taking because of financial issues, so my mental is NOT in a great place and I've had NO spoons for the past month. But while on call with her, she seriously, unironically, asked me if I thought I really needed the meds. Because, apparently, I "wasn't acting like I needed them" or something like that. And I'm sure I don't need to explain why that pissed me tf off.
But, like... at the time, the closest thing I could come up with for an answer was that "I have no spoons and no energy to do anything"; "I lived 17 years without meds, I kind-of know how to fake it"; and "I haven't had much socializing lately, so I have enough Social Energy™ to fake being okay right now."
Now that I'm not being put on the spot and after reading that post, I'm slowly figuring out that I've always done this. I mean, I've obviously always struggled to describe my own emotions and need to analyze my physical reactions to figure them out, but like. I'm just now starting to realize that I've really struggled to describe exactly how I'm "feeling bad" or, in fact, that I am feeling bad at all.
I mean, again, considering the alexithymia, that last part is a given. But it's kinda putting into perspective exactly how I've always had to understand "I don't have the energy to do anything" or "it's incredibly difficult to do anything" or "something deep inside of me feels Wrong™ and I can neither address nor identify it". I'd just passively have those "feelings" and struggle to continue life despite them.
It brings back thoughts of my struggles with masking, and how I was never diagnosed with autism as a child. Looking back, it should've been incredibly obvious. I had SO many of the tell-tale signs. But I guess it wasn't today, and there wasn't anywhere near as much awareness of what those signs were... but really. Textbook.
I'm sure my masking made it more difficult to recognize the signs as I got older. Hell, I even read over different "autism diagnosis checklist"s countless times, thinking to myself "oh wow it's a lot like me!... exceeeeeptttt--" and moved on from there.
I keep digressing. My point is, since discovering my autism and how it was hidden by masking, I've always wondered where my mask ends and where I begin. Most of the time, I feel like I feel nothing, even when I'm not depressed. I've been told I don't show my emotions, like when I'm happy (aka my chest is light and I feel free). That, or people can't tell when I like/dislike them (though that's partially a trauma thing). Other times, I've been told I'm smiling when I didn't even realize I was happy, much less that I was actually smiling. Some people have told me I'm incredibly easy to read, that my emotions show very clearly. But how can they when I feel like I feel nothing?
Which leads me back to what I said earlier, my conversation with my mother. How she asked if I actually need my meds because "I don't seem like I do". I guess I kind-of understand now, why she might've seen it that way. Do most people always show signs of how they actually feel? And how does the fact that I "don't feel" effect what I show?
I've wondered about that for a while. How much of how I act is because I was trained to, one way or another? How much of the emotion I show is because I learned to? Do I even show the emotions I feel? I really can't know because the people I know irl, who would better be able to tell me how I act, aren't understanding of any of these things. My older sister is lowkey ableist and thinks she sees the grand plan of the universe, my mother is too "pull yourself up by the bootstraps!!!" to accept Spoon Theory or mental health struggles, and just about everyone else in my life comes and goes as quickly as the wind.
Anyhow, this was a long rant that I've kinda had half-formed thoughts about for a while. Thanks for reading, hopefully this can help or entertain whoever stumbles upon this?
#Barlowe's thoughts#long post#btw if you were wondering#the reason I kept looking at autism diagnosis checklists is because I was writing autistic characters#and I didn't know I was autistic yet#the first one was on purpose#but the second one was a complete accident haha#after I got my diagnosis#and yknow#got an understanding of my autism and others'#I actually did an amazing job on the first character#and obviously especially on the second haha#Basil my beloved#he's actually so much like me#ANOTHER thing that really should've tipped me off tbh#I think it's because Basil doesn't mask whereas I do#tho maybe it's also slightly related to the whole “he's a guy and I'm a woman” thing?#idk but#autism#autistic adult#autistic#autistic things#actually autistic#actually audhd#audhd#alexithymia#masking#neurodivergent#autism masking#autistic struggles
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CW: Mentions of blood and coughing blood, coughing out teeth.
Chat i just fucking started coughing which.. okay! Normal, but then it got harsher like q lot harsher and i felt my teeth move i'm not even joking, i'm serious.. so i was like "okay so that just happen" and then i start to cough out all of my teeth. All my teeth just went bye-bye, there's a pool of blood and they are in there.. also turns out that the pain on my teeth and gum was because i AM LITERALLY GROWING NEW TEETH. SHARP TEETH, FANGS EVEN, IF YOU WANT TO CALL IT THAT.
I look like a a fucking shark. God i smell so bad now because, y'know.. blood. Uuugh i hate life.
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whats the point of a man wearing a tie other than it being there so i can pull it to bring him close to me preferably to kiss him 🤨?
NONE
its there for that and that only
#does this even make sense#idk but#most men i like and wear a tie are taller than me#cough cough#aaron hotchner#spencer reid#um#ummmm#idk they're the only men i had in mind when i made this point#i think im going thry my hotch phase again#🫠🫠#starlite 𖤐 is gay#criminal minds#i already tagged the characters so
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Hello, welcome to Olive Garden. I’m Alcryst, and to make up for ruining your evening as your waiter, can I get you started with some breadsticks?
#I saw the bread bow and knew what I needed to do#alcryst#fire emblem engage#fe17#that’s the right number right?#idk but#hardest decision I’ve had to make in my play through was having to make him eat it#it was a necessary sacrifice :(
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Anyways uhm
I'm not sure what to post now, so have a Boyfriend. He's doing very well.
#friday night funkin#random thoughts#boyfriend fnf#boyfriend#help#i dont know what people like for me to post#art? questions?#idk but#yeah#we are so fucking back#we are getting this game!!!
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for the sake of cod people are still not giving a fuck about my boundaries 😭
#LIKE BITCH.#IF I SAY DNI WHY ARE YOU INTERACTING ?#Like they know VERY well it triggers me#I might just make a huge post talking Abt this cuz#Like#people don’t ducking care about my comfort of smth ?#IDK BUT
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someone get me to the doctor 🏥🏥🏥 and someone call the nurse 🧑⚕️🧑⚕️🧑⚕️ and someone buy me roses 🌹🌹🌹 and someone burned the church 🔥🔥🔥 we’re hanging out with corpses ☠️☠️☠️ and driving in this hearse 🚗🚗🚗 and someone save my soul tonight 😱😱😱 please save my soul ‼️‼️‼️
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