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heyheydidjaknow · 4 years ago

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I would’ve posted this earlier but, alas, I passed out early. This is a longer one, but tumblr got its act together so I can post it all in one part. You guys know where the other chapters are, and if you don’t, they’re at the end of the chapter. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to go eat straight Nutella.

Chapter 10

“I’m thinking about getting some gloves.”

He looks over at you as he laces up his skates. “Yeah?”

“Yeah,” you nod, smiling slightly to yourself as you look your hands over, trying to imagine what they would look like. “Like, badass, fingerless gloves.”

He smiles. “Dude, those would look metal as fuck.”

“Totally, right?” Your smile widens. “With studs and shit.”

He gets to his feet, hopping onto the ice. “Hell yeah.” He drops a puck to assault as you go back to your backed-up coursework the best you can—your handwriting has gone to hell, but you are working with what you have.

You flinch at the crack of his stick, the cross of the T ending up underneath the letter somehow. A cheer from Casey tells you the rubber cylinder’s fate.

‘I swear I learned this.' You squint at the basic algebra, the pencil, crudely held in your fist, hovering over the packet. ‘Why can’t I do this?’

“How’s your pile coming along?” Another crack.

“It’s comin’.” You run your fingers through your hair. “Just… trynna remember how to do ne—… subtraction.” ‘Not debate. Negating is debate.’

He laughs. Another crack. “Man, that thing really fucked you over, huh?”

“Thoroughly.” You decide against continuing to torture yourself, having been at it for the past five hours—most of it in the library before Casey invited you to watch him practice some more— and set the large stack of homework back in your bag. “Are you actually making the shots?”

“Casey Jones doesn’t miss shots.” Another crack.

“Pardon me, oh almighty king of the ice.” You stand on your good leg, grabbing the side of the wall to watch as he went back to collect his pucks.

You two have managed to bond over a mutual respect/love of heavy metal and hockey and, seeing as you are staying out of the Hamatos’ hair for a while—not upon request, but out of courtesy—you have managed to spend a lot more time with him than you may have otherwise. Your school has not assigned Biology any big projects yet, so, until you are assigned it, you do not have anything other than your health to stress about.

“Pardon accepted.” You watch his form as he performs another slap shot.

“You…” you trail off, trying to remember what you were going to say.

“What?”

You shrug. “Dunno.” You lean your head on your arms. “I’ll remember eventually.”

He drops the second puck. “Got any plans after this?”

You sigh. “Nope. Probably gonna head home and try not to cut my fingers making dinner again.”

He takes another shot. “Then let’s go out after this. You and me.”

You smile. “What, don’t have any plans either?”

“Nah.” He drops the third. “Dad doesn’t care if I’m home late anyway.”

“True, true.” You have decided against prying into his home life; it is not your place and does not concern you in the slightest. “Where do you wanna go?”

“Wanna catch a movie? Heard there was this new pizza place just a couple blocks down if you wanna try to sneak it in.”

You snicker. “In the box and all?”

“Yes.” He grins mischievously and hits this one off the walls. Some way, somehow, it still makes it into the goal. “I bet your sweatshirt is big enough to stick the box under.”

You stick your tongue out at him. “Not in the mood for burns on top of scars, Jones,” you reprimand him teasingly. “That just ain't it.”

“Then you can wear mine under that one and—”

“Your sweat-soaked hoodie you’ve been practicing in all day?” You cringe at the thought. “Over my dead body.”

“I mean…” he licks his teeth, smile widening, “it’s not exactly like you’re in the best—”

You laugh. “So not cool!”

He puts his hands up in defense, gliding over. “I mean, am I wrong, though?”

“That is completely besides the point, you ass.” You balance on your foot, crossing your arms. “Damn. Making fun of the girl with the broken leg.”

He leans against the wall. “Man, you were dying before the crash.”

You roll your eyes. “Alright, whatever, Jones.” You lean against your hand. “How’s Johanna,” you sing.

He presses his hand against your face, pushing you away. “Annie is doing fine.”

You grin, steadying yourself on the wall. “Do you feel her, Johanna?”

“I’m gonna tell her you call her that if you don’t quit it.”

“Do you think that walls can hide her? Even when you’re at her window?”

He pushed his arm all the way out. You hop back.

“Her name isn’t even Johanna.”

“But she is Johanna,” you whine in protest, not bothering to hide your mirth. “She has the hair, the voice, the disposition. She’s an ingénue and you know it.” You have been teasing him about this for a while now: the girl in question—Annabelle Halshaw, a year below you two—had caught his eye when he had heard through the grapevine that she was the lead singer in some indie band. When he had shown you a picture and told you the story, you insisted on calling her Johanna for her golden hair and soft, sweet singing voice he had proudly had you listen to.

“She’s not.”

You roll your eyes, sitting back down as you grab your bag. “Lie to yourself all you want,” you goad, “but deep down, you know in your heart that the truth,” you put a finger up, “is apparent.”

He hops off the ice, sitting next to you as he unlaces his skates. “Whatever.” He smirks. “How’s The Don?”

You avert your gaze. “I haven’t seen ‘im.”

“Boo.” He tied the laces together. “Some girlfriend you are,” he ribs.

You go red. “Not my boyfriend. Not even friends with benefits.”

“Yeah, sure.” He sets the skates into his bag. “That’s why you already know his family.”

“That—”

“And why you’ve had him over to your place.”

“If you don’t cool your tits, I’m telling Lucy you’re crushing on her friend.”

“Don’t you dare!”

“What,” you simper, “think I won’t?”

He grabs his bag. “If you do, I’ll show her that video.”

You laugh, following him out of the rink. “You’re the worst.” You note how strange it is that he spent so little time on the ice as you two walk out, but you do not say anything about it.

“Hey, you’re the one throwing threats around.”

“Yeah,” you argue, “but my threat is clearly better.”

He rolls his eyes, pushing you again.

You two keep chatting on the way to the theatre about anything and everything, from new bands to upcoming games to the newest blockbuster horror movies. You are not personally on the hockey team, but, as his friend, it is your duty to care. Besides, you figure, it gives you something to look forward to.

The movie is fine. You convince him against sneaking an entire pizza in, you split a bucket of popcorn, and you give him shit for getting freaked out by the disembowelment scene. It is payback for him teasing you about crying during the last movie you two went to a couple of days ago.

You two stand at the streetlight.

“Dude, it’s like eight,” he groans. “It’s not even late.”

“True,” you agree. “Counterpoint: I still have another week’s worth of work to do by Friday on top of the homework I’ll have to do anyway, so unless you wanna help—”

“Forget I asked.” He pulls his hood up against the autumn wind. “Need me to walk you back?”

“Nah.” You shrug. “If someone mugs me, they’ll give me an excuse to not do my homework.”

“Murdered?

“I’m already halfway there.”

He grins. “See ya tomorrow, Y/N.”

“See ya, Jones.” You wave as he runs off.

The walk home is quiet and considerably easier than it was a couple of weeks ago. Seeing as you now get queasy whenever you get into a car, you have been limited to taking the subway and walking, which, among other things, has contributed positively to your physical strength. You know that you should probably at least try to take the bus or a cab around town to build your tolerance up, but the last time you tried, you had almost tripped and fallen from how shaky your legs were getting out. Oddly enough, you note as you go through the door, you do not have a considerably larger fear of heights than you did before, or of fire, but cars were tripping you up, even though you were the one that crashed it. You feel thankful that, at least, you do not think your fear is crippling. At least, you reason, you can still get into the car.

You lock the door behind you, debating whether you feel like adding to the collection of cuts you now possess— they are self-inflicted, but not intentionally so; you stubbornly refuse to acknowledge the fact that you physically cannot use your hands to cut things. You decide against it tonight, tossing your bag on the bed as you sprawl across it, admittedly exhausted. You allow yourself a couple of seconds with your eyes closed before you pull yourself up with a groan and get back to work.

A part of you wishes that you had the physical energy to stay out longer. You are always trying to find excuses not to sleep, and although the mountain of homework and readjusting your timelines for things you missed is certainly one way to keep yourself preoccupied, it is not exactly what you would consider fun. Then again, reliving your greatest traumas while you sleep is not exactly fun either.

You catch yourself peeling at the newly applied bandages on your fingers, fingernails catching under the crudely applied adhesives. Applying bandages properly requires more dexterity and patience than you currently possess, and you are hardly going to ask someone else for help with something as stupid as that. You have lasted this long without needing too much help. People can live by themselves. You will live, probably. Well? Not your concern.

‘I should eat something.’ Your eyes strain to focus on the piece of paper in front of you, your mind wandering aimlessly as you try to impress the actual importance of finishing this upon yourself, but you find that is an insurmountable feat.

You drop your bag off the side of the bed, reaching down and pulling your shoe off, leaning back into your pillows, the weight of the day practically immobilizing you. Fumbling hands switch the lamp off, bathing your room in momentary, blissful darkness before the gravity of your decision sets in.

“Alright, me,” you breathe to yourself. “What’s it gonna be today? My folks? Bradford? What’s his face? Hell,” you chuckle, “why not all three? I’m sadistic enough, I’m sure.”

You close your eyes. “Give me your worse,” you challenge as you slip into unconsciousness.

Two weeks.

He had kept his distance for about two weeks. It was not as if he did not care or was not morbidly curious what the crash had done to you—his glances through the curtains did not tell him much-- but, after some debate, he had figured you needed time to recuperate before you would want his company. Two weeks, he figured, would be enough time for you to get back on your feet or, at least, for you to start wanting company.

His excuse to see you had come in the form of his brother’s newfound prideful boasting. Feigning insult was as good an excuse as any to go see you; after all, he just so happened to be in the neighborhood anyway, and it was normal to pop in to see someone if you were already just a couple blocks down, right? Sneaking away was easy enough—they would not mind his absence—and he, after much prep work, knew exactly how and why he was going to say the things he would to get in your good favor. The plan, he knows, would have gone swimmingly.

His plans seem asinine when he hears you crying.

His brothers do not cry much. He does not, either; it was a habit that they had all thoroughly bullied themselves out of when they were much younger and, if they still did, he knew nothing of it. His master did not encourage this, per se, but talked, then, frequently about the importance of maintaining a more stoic disposition and not allowing emotions to cripple you in battle. Practically, Donatello was satisfied with that explanation, having not properly cried for more than a year now. To hear the sound again, especially coming from you, was novel.

Novel, too, is how you are crying. The sound is less of actual sobbing and more of you being strangled, quiet gasps for air escaping your lips as you shake on the bed, curled in on yourself and clutching at your chest as if whatever pain you are experiencing is centered and can be relieved by something between your collarbones. His eyes, for the first time, trace the lines on your skin, your sleeves riding up your arms to reveal them to him, tears racing down and along the gash in your face. Everything about the scene, from the soft gasping of panic to your position to the heavy scarring, is completely foreign to him, rivaled only by one or two particularly hard nights when he and his brother were much younger.

He slides in through the window, leaning onto the bed. His fingers flick your lamp back on as he grabs your shivering shoulder tightly, shaking you awake as he mumbles words of encouragement. He is not sure if his help will be appreciated, if snapping you out of it was even what he is supposed to do in this situation, but now is not the time to think of that. You are in pain. He can offer you this kindness. “Wake up,” he pleads, not thinking of how this would look until your eyes snap open to look at him.

Immediately, the reality of the situation sets in, and he scrambles off the bed. ‘Why did I think that would be a good idea?’ Panic. ‘You just walked into her room like a fucking creep. See, now she’s going to—’

“Sorry.”

He blinks, looking up at you from his place on the floor. “Huh?”

You clear your throat, wiping the tears from your eye with your sleeve quickly as you bring your knees to your chest, voice hoarse. “Sorry,” you repeat. “That you… I’m not sure what I’m apologizing for, but I know I should be apologizing.”

He is completely dumbfounded.

Your eyes glance to the open window. “I should probably start closing and locking my window, right?” You rub the back of your neck, voice clearing the longer you talk. “It didn’t occur to me since I’m so high up, but if you guys can get in, The Foot can too, right?”

‘Why is she apologizing?’

You push the hair out of your face. ‘You need something, right? I—uh—need to stop saying ‘right’ so much.” You shake your head to clear it. “’ Sup?”

He hears himself mumble some bullshit out about being in the neighborhood.

You sigh. “Sorry.” You close your eyes. “I’m usually up later; I’ve been so tired lately.”

‘Is she serious right now?’ He is completely lost. ‘She was just crying her eyes out in her sleep and now she’s apologizing? Did I miss something?’ You are smiling now, eyes still bloodshot, as if the whole thing is a figment of his imagination, still shivering where you sit.

He rises to his feet, kneeling in front of you on the bed. “What was it about?”

You blink, seemingly confused. “Huh?”

“Your nightmare,” he clarifies. “You were crying. What was it about?”

You avert eye contact. “Nothing too crazy,” you shrug. “Just about the crash. Nothing too exciting.” If possible, he thinks the bags under your eyes are worse than the last time you saw him.

He takes your hands loosely, turning them palms up to look, for the first time, at the patchwork quilt that is now your skin. “What happened in it?” He runs his thumb along the lines, keeping his voice low; he remembers how that used to help when Mikey used to have fits when they were younger. Leonardo and Raphael were never good at that; they took better to being more violently snapped out of their moods, but, then again, they never had this kind of breakdown; theirs were always more driven by loathing, self or otherwise.

You pause, still not looking him in the face as your muscles relax. He remembers, vividly, how he had done something similar when you two had first met, how much better, health-wise, you looked. ‘How long has it been since then? Three months? A little less?’

You take a deep breath. “Just… family shit,” you mumble, eyelids drooping as you trace his frame loosely. “Fire.”

Your gaze is piercing as you finally look at him properly. He feels something catch in his throat as you bow your head.

“It’s my fault, you know.” Your voice is so soft, barely a whisper. “That they’re dead, I mean.”

The air is a suffocating blanket that smothers you both.

“I never told you, did I?” Your focus does not shift as it might have a bit ago. It is locked solely and intensely on him, taking in every detail of his expression. “How I died? How they died? Why I died?”

Hesitantly, he shakes his head. He thinks it best to just be quiet and let you talk. He does not think he has ever heard anyone speak in quite the same tones, ever looked at him quite the same way you are.

You take another breath. “I wanted to try my hand at baking.” You force your eyes to stay focused on his. “I was—still am—not good about sleep. I always slept bad, and never at the right times. I used to take pills for it, to try to get myself back on track.”

He sees where this is going.

“I thought I could still stay up as late as I was used to.” You glance to the side, stealing yourself a second before focusing back on the boy in front of you. “I sat down in my room, turned on a movie. I set a timer. I fell asleep.” You swallow, hands shaking in his. “I can’t smell well, either. I must not have smelled the burning.” Your lips curl in a bitter smile. “Sure as fuck felt it, though, when I woke up.”

He lets you finish.

You try to blink the tears out of your eyes. “They were asleep,” Your voice rises ever so slightly. “I fell asleep at two something. I woke up when they started yelling.” You purse your lips, face reddening in shame as your nostrils flair. “They were trying to get someone out of bed when the roof caved in above them. My door got blocked.”

You feel yourself smile.

“So,” you strain not to cry, “that, Donatello, is why I’m here and why I’m dead, and why I really do deserve to burn again.” You laugh. “Hell, my body count is rivaling some serial killers, so that’s… that’s certainly something.”

He lets go of your hands, face blank.

You lean forward, placing your hands on your knees. “I don’t blame you,” You wipe a wayward tear out of your eyes, trying to swallow the frog in your throat. “Fuck, man, I’d think less of me, too, if it were me.” You nod towards the window. “I get it if you want to leave, but I thought you might want to know why—”

He stops you mid-sentence, wrapping his arms around you and pulling you to him.

Your arms lay slack at your sides as you try to process what is happening.

He does not say a word.

You break.

You burry your face into him, tears welling in your eyes as you let out a strangled sob. You hold onto him tightly as you struggle to breathe, body shaking as you wrap your own arms around him the best you can. The sound roars in your ears like thunder, the deafening quiet of the apartment punctuated only by your own cries. He gently holds you there, resting his head on top of yours. Each sound you make sounds as though you are physically being choked by your guilt, and his chest feels as though it is being crushed by an invisible hand as he listens to your pain.

Neither of you knows how long you stay like that.

He considers telling you a story from a long time ago, about some training he and his brothers had back then, but thought better of it; he does not want to upset you any more than you already are, and being in good company with someone like him may not be exactly what you need right now. Granted, he does not know what you do need, but he knows listening to him talk about bashing brains would not help your sensibilities any.

Instead, he stays quiet.

You pull away after a while, wiping your face off again as you mumble out an apology.

“Don’t apologize.” He clears his throat. “It’s good to cry; it releases endorphins.”

You smile at that. “Well,” you giggle tearfully, “if it releases endorphins.”

He smiles back, face flushing. You look good, he thinks, even with your face all red. He knows that, scientifically, there is probably a reason, but he cannot think of it right now.

He stands up. “I’ll get—”

You grab his hand tightly.

He looks back at you.

“Can I ask a favor?”

He blinks. “Of course,” he agrees easily. “Anything.”

You glance off. “Promise not to take it weird?”

He feels his heart rate increase. “Y-yeah,” he nods.

He feels you pull him gently back on the bed. “Can you stay here tonight?”

His eyes widen as they flicker between the mattress and you. “What,” he clarifies breathlessly, “like sleep with you?”

You nod.

“In the same bed?”

You hesitate, nod again.

He clears his throat, face heating again. “Like, actually?”

“If it wasn’t actually, I wouldn’t ask, would I?” You grip his hand tightly. “I just really don’t want to be alone tonight.”

‘Oh.’ He mentally kicks himself. ‘She’s scared. Don’t make her uncomfortable.’

“It’s alright if you don’t—”

He is extremely quick to reassure you that he is more than happy—‘Bad choice of wording.’—to stay tonight until you fall asleep, but that he would not stay the whole night as to not worry his brothers.

You nod in agreement. “That’s fine.” You rub the back of your neck. “Not sure I would be good company when I wake up, anyway; I still have class.”

“Oh, right.” He nods in understanding, pushing himself further onto the bed. “Which side…?”

You shrug. “Which way do you face?”

“I usually lie on my stomach.”

“Then it doesn’t matter.” You slide your sweatshirt over your head after a bit of squirming around, tossing it onto the couch.

His face is now scarlet. “Okay then,” he mumbles, laying down on the side away from the window. ‘Is she going to—no, stop that.’

You look over at him, face down on the mattress. You can almost feel the heat coming off him. “Are you alright there, buddy?”

He nods.

You shrug, laying down under the blanket and curling into him, facing the window. “Mind getting the light?”

He reaches over, clicking it off.

You sigh in content, turning to face him, teetering on the edge of the mattress. “I’m not venomous,” you inform him teasingly. “I’ve said it once and I’ll say it again: of the two of us, you should not be the one who’s a nervous wreck.”

“You dunno that.” His voice is muffled by the bed.

“You’re the strong one,” you argue.

“So?” He turns his head to look at you. “I’m the guy laying in the—I’m just gonna stop that sentence.”

“It’s only bad if it isn’t consensual.” You smile reassuringly. “I invited you to lay with me, right? So, unless I make you uneasy, then we’re all good.”

He breaks eye contact. “So,” he clarifies, “you don’t mind if I move closer to you?”

You shake your head.

He hesitantly slides himself further onto the bed. “Can I move closer than this?”

“You’ve already seen me bawl my eyes out. You’re doing me a service. Move as close or as far as you want.”

He moves to press his side against you. “Is this fine?”

You nod. “Look, how about this?” You rest your arm under your head. “If you do something I’m uncomfortable with, the safe word is pina colada.”

‘We already have a safe word?’ He was not sure if he is on cloud nine or just terrified of you.

You are very confused why he looks so warm. “Do you need me to turn the AC on?”

He shakes his head. “I’m good,” he assures you tightly. Slowly, he reached an arm out and over your waist, pulling you closer. You do not seem to resist in any way, wrapping your good leg around one of his to pull him closer.

‘Conscious touching.’ He glances down at you, trying to act cool. ‘Conscious, intentional touching. She smells so nice and she feels—okay, this is not going to work if you keep being a perv.’

“Thanks,” you mumble, humming softly. “I appreciate this more than you know.”

Cloud nine. Definitely on cloud nine.

“Every time.”

You giggle.

He blinks. “What?”

“Every time,” you note, already nodding off. “Like in that book.”

‘Which one?’ “They wrote it down for a reason, right?” The longer he spends like this, the smoother he feels.

“Totally.” You smile, closing your eyes. “Just know that this goes both ways, alright? If you ever need help like this, you know who to call.”

This is new. ‘Help like this? What, like crying?’ His eyebrows furrow as he tries to understand what you mean. ‘Or he means if I ever need company in my—what did I just say?’

You pick up on his confusion. “Emotional help, I mean.” Your fingers trace the indentations in his shell absentmindedly. “I mean, I know sometimes I didn’t want to go to my family about stuff. I dunno if you have that…” you trail off, realizing that you might be unintentionally bashing his brothers. You sincerely do not want to blow this.

“I mean,” he says after a bit, “I think I get what you’re talking about.” He sighs. “You mean stuff that they’d make fun of me for, right?”

You nod.

He feels his heart melt a little. “I’ll have to take you up on that.”

You forgot how safe he makes you feel. “Goodnight, Donnie,” you mumble sleepily.

“Goodnight, Y/N.”

You pass out not long after that. If he has to estimate a general amount of time, he will clock it in at about five minutes. He does not move, however, until about thirty minutes before sunrise, too busy listening to the sound of your breathing and memorizing how exactly your body feels next to his. As he slips out of the window, early morning air waking him back up completely, he wonders if, someday, he could stay to see you wake up next to him. Not out of necessity, but just because you both wanted to stay like that for a while more.

‘I hope so. It’s a nice dream to have, anyhow.’

Table of Contents

Chapter 9

Chapter 11

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urirealvibekiller · 4 years ago

Note

Heyy just wanted to talk to someone about this and i felt comfortable doing it with you so i hope you dont mind. So im 20 yrs old and am in college. I first joined a university that was on the level of Cambridge in our country just because my dad was working there and i didnt know what i wanted to do yet. I joined a course in chemistry. I couldnt understand any of the classes but tried my best to atleast take notes for the first month but after that i stopped attending classes.(💙1)

i’m putting a trigger warning just in case.

tw: suicide attempt, suicidal thoughts, and abuse

I used to stay in the library the whole day avoiding my dad and used to just read novels. I failed all of the exams and my dad also found out i was skipping classes so i told him i couldnt do it and quit after a semester. After that i joined the college im currently studying in which is not that great but i could cope with the studies atleast. For the first semester i failed four out of six subjects because I just couldnt bring myself to study for some reason.(💙2)

At this point my dad got angry at me and said i was humiliating him because i graduated high school with a gpa of 9.5 and i was being like this now. He spent a lot of money on my high-school so he called it a waste. And I lost my mom when i was 11 in an accident and since then my dad has raised me. And now im in my final year and atill cant bring myself to study. I just hate studying. I dont want to do this. My dad had started calling me names since i failed the second time and i hate it.(💙3)

He also hits me once in a while when he's very angry. I just hate it so much. I tried to end my life but failed in that too lol. He doesnt know it. He sometimes says he regrets having me and that i should have died instead of my mom in that accident. And that he'll kill me someday out of anger. He just criticizes me in every single thing i do. I am really really skinny and am very insecure about it. I hate going out cause sometimes i catch people laughing at me and pointing at my body.(💙4)

I found nct last year and looking at them living their life happily and watching them have fun and laugh makes me feel better. I keep trying to end my life but i just cant. I hate studying. I wish i had some other goal in my life which could make me work hard. I dont blame my dad. Im such a waste of life. I wish i would just die. I dont know what to do with my life anymore. And thank you for this i just wanted to get this off my chest. I wish i had a way out of this mess. (💙 end)

______

hey love <33 i don’t mind in the slightest so don’t worry <3

i’m really sorry that you went through and are going through all that. it’s horrible and you deserve so much better. regarding your college situation, it would be easy to say just drop out and find something you love to do but i know that that’s easier said than done especially because you’re already in your final year and have already spent so much time for it. i understand how you feel about studying. i used to feel that way about some subjects i really hated too but what i found helpful was i tried to find at least one thing i liked about it and i tried to build up from there. i hope you find some way love <33

and about your dad. it’s absolutely not okay how he’s treating you. it’s abusive. do you have anyone - a relative, a teacher, or even a friend - that you can talk to and that can help you with this situation?

you are not a waste of life. i know you feel otherwise but just the fact that your heart is beating makes you worth it as a person. honestly you really don’t need a reason or a purpose to be alive. you are alive. and that’s reason enough to stay alive. but you know, when you’re alive, you have opportunities to do and discover things that you love and that will surely lead you to your purpose. it’s okay to feel like giving up but please don’t give in to it.

i understand it is hard but i believe in you and the fact that you’re even reaching out to me right now is a good step forward and i’m so proud of you for being so strong and brave. i really wish there is more i can do to help but right now, i think seeking professional help (if possible) might be best.

i’m always here for you if you ever want to talk about anything so please never hesitate to message me <33

#anon #<33

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h-styles-babes · 6 years ago

Text

Harry Styles Blurb/Request #10

Alright, I searched for like half an hour to try to find the request I got for this prompt, but I couldn’t fine it. But, just know someone requested this off a prompt list several months ago, and I finally got inspiration to write it because I’ve definitely been in a much better place lately. So I really hope you enjoy it, and let me know what you think!

WARNING: All the smut. This is basically just 4500 words of kink. You’ve been warned.

32. “You’re acting like this is your first threesome.”

There wasn’t much about uni that Y/N didn’t like. She was the academic type, so she really enjoyed getting to take classes she had interest in and getting to sit and discuss with people who held similar interests, who would participate and lend something insightful to said conversations. She enjoyed the work she got to do in her major, shadowing people in the field and getting to talk to her professors, who usually were full of amazing information and resources. She loved the freedom it allowed her to make her own decisions in her day to day life and for her long-term goals. She loved it, truly.

But of the few things she didn’t like about uni—including the food at the dining hall and the obnoxious frat parties—she especially disliked group projects.

See, Y/N was more of a ‘do it herself’ kind of girl. She worked well on her own because she was able to control the procedure and the outcome. She was able to do what she thought was best without input from anyone else. She’d always lived by the saying “If you want something done right, do it yourself,” because she’d found in her time at school, that the saying rang true with herself. She always tended to be the person that cared the most and put in the most effort whenever she was put in a group, so why bother with group members when she could accomplish the same thing—sometimes better—all alone?

So, imagine her displeasure when she’d walked into her 10 am Monday class to a stack of papers describing a group project that would last the remainder of the semester. She groaned audibly when she read the first line of the description, realising she’d be working with two other people who would be randomly chosen by her professor. Her prof chuckled at her, knowing her distaste for group work from years of having her in classes. It was her last year of uni, so she was taking a relatively easy class after getting all her more vigourous coursework out of the way early on. The class was open to all years, and she just really hoped she didn’t get paired up with first years. She still had to graduate, after all, and she didn’t want a grade that hinged on this project being dictated by a bunch of eighteen year olds.

“You’ll be fine, promise,” Professor Zimmerman told her, throwing her a wink as she sighed and trudged up to where she was sat toward the center of the room.

It was a smaller class, with only twenty-four students enrolled, so they occupied a regular classroom and not a lecture hall. She usually sat next to an Irish boy named Niall who was in his final year as well, and he was really nice. A bit rowdy sometimes with a jolting laugh, but he was kind and had a lot to offer during discussions, and he actually took the time to talk to Y/N when he saw her around campus. She considered him a friend, and she was really hoping Professor Zimmerman would take pity on her and pair her with Niall, at the very least. She could deal with anyone else as long as she had him in her group.

Niall slid into his seat just a few moments after she did, and he grinned at her. “Think I convinced Zimmerman to put us in a group together,” he told her.

Y/N’s eyes lit up as she looked at him. “You’re serious?” Niall nodded. “Oh god, you’re the best. I was seriously dreading this. Imagine if I got paired with two first years? I would have cried.”

“I know, that’s why I sweet talked ‘im. Now we just gotta wait and see who our third person is.”

They didn’t have to wait long to find out.

Zimmerman started the class by separating everyone into groups. Everyone had at least skimmed the paper already, so they knew what they were in for, so everyone listened intently as he called out names three at a time. Niall and Y/N were part of the fourth group to be called.

“Group Four will be Mr. Horan, Miss Y/L/N, and Mr. Styles.”

Y/N felt her heart seize up at the mention of that name. She hadn’t spoken to him in months, let alone even look his way in this class. She’d nearly forgotten they were even in it together. Her mind had done a pretty good job of purging all unpleasant thoughts from her mind from the previous term. She’d known him and Niall were mates, but they didn't talk much in this class, and she’d never seen Niall out and about with him by his side.

When Zimmerman was done calling out groups and instructing everyone to take the rest of the class time to come up with ideas for the project, the class moved, everyone rearranging themselves to be next to their group mates.

The seat in front of Y/N vacated, and she could see him approaching her and Niall from the corner of her eye. She didn’t dare look up at him; she wasn’t sure what her reaction would be to seeing his face again after letting herself move on from what happened. She busied herself with pulling out a notebook to take notes on for their ideas to avoid having to watch him sit.

“Can’t believe Zimmerman put us all together,” Niall said as Y/N felt the seat in front of her be filled. She smelled him before she even looked at him, that same enticing scent of his much-too-expensive cologne and the spearmint gum he seemed to constantly be chewing. She sort of hated herself for remembering those things about him, but some things were harder to forget than others.

“We’re the oldest ones in the class,” he replied. “Think Zimmerman took pity on us.”

Y/N’s jaw clenched as she heard his voice again, the same slow drawl of his words and they way his accent curled around his vowels. She hated that her heart jumped at the sound. Traitor.

“Good to see yeh again, Y/N,” he said, dipping his head to try to catch her eye from where they were focused on the paper on her desk.

“Harry,” she greeted, trying her best to sound casual. She busied herself with titling the paper. Anything to keep her from having to face him.

“Somethin’ wrong?” he asked, sounding sincere about his inquiry, but YN could sense the smugness in his words. She knew him. He wasn’t malicious and he didn’t ever intend to be mean, but he was a person who liked to tease, and he had sufficient ammo against her. It was something she’d just have to deal with, she supposed. For the rest of the term, at least.

“No, just not really fond of group projects. Work better by myself.”

She could see Niall nod at her sympathetically from beside her, opening his mouth to say something, but Harry beat him to it.

“You’re actin’ like this is your first threesome,” he said, doing that thing again where it sounded innocent, but when Y/N’s eyes finally flashed to his, she could see everything.

He knew what that meant. She could see in his eyes that he was remembering. The smirk on his face confirmed it.

She could see it all in the brightness of his eyes. She saw herself, a mouth on her breast, a head between her legs, hands roaming heated skin. The sounds of skin slipping and smacking, mouths gasping and groaning. The sensation of hair being pulled, nails scratching down backs, marks swelling over smooth skin. Thoughts she’d pushed in the depths of her mind for months came flooding to the surface, causing her to audibly gasp.

Niall must have thought she was affronted by the wording, because he reprimanded his friend with a squawk of his name. “Coulda worded that better, mate. Not everyone’s a sexual deviant like you.”

The way that Harry looked at Y/N assured her that not everyone was a sexual deviant like him, but he knew from experience that Y/N certainly was. Niall didn’t know that, though. No one knew aside from Harry and the other random woman that had been there with them that evening. People always joked that it was the quiet ones you had to watch out for, but no one ever really considered it in real life. No one would ever venture to guess that Y/N was the way she was, due to her bookish qualities and quiet demeanour. Harry saw through it though, even in the beginning. He saw her, and that terrified her.

“She knows what I meant,” Harry shrugged off, effectively dismissing the tense atmosphere that had descended upon them.

The trio was able to get through the rest of the class without any further weirdness, and they were actually able to come up with a solid idea and plan for their project. It required them spending quite a bit of time together over the next several weeks, but Y/N had to deal with it in order to get a good grade in the class. She just wanted to graduate, so she would do what she had to achieve that.

Y/N spent some time in the library to do some research for their project. She’d been looking into something online and realised the library had the original text in stock, so she went off looking for it. She didn’t realise when she began her search that it was three stories up in the very back of the building, where the lights were dim and no one except for the librarian ever ventured. The spines of the books looked like they hadn’t been touched in at least a decade, and she was afraid her allergies were going to start acting up with all the stuff lingering in the air.

She finally reached the section where the online catalog had said the book would, be, so she started looking more closely at the spines. The author’s name started with a C, and she was nearly in the B’s, so she knew she was headed in the right direction. The only problem was that she soon realised that the author she was looking for was all the way on the second to the top shelf, and there was no way she’d be able to reach it, even on her tip toes. She huffed and looked around to see if there was a stool nearby. When she could see that there wasn’t, she rolled her eyes and readied herself to make a bit of an ascent up the bookshelves.

She successfully got both feet up on the second shelf from the bottom, but when she extended her hand up, the book was still just out of her reach. She was able to touch the spine, but there was no way she was getting a good enough grip on it to pull it out from the books it was wedged between.

A sound at the end of the aisle startled her and made her lose her balance. She was incredibly afraid she was going to fall back and crack her head open on the set of shelves behind her, and she was preparing herself for the impact, eyes closed and body rigid to try to protect herself.

However, the impact never came, and instead there were arms around her waist, steadying her, and a body pressed flush against her own, pressing her front against the bookshelf she was previously stood on.

“Yeh’re a clumsy one, aren’t yeh?”

Y/N couldn’t help the shiver that ran down her spine at the hoarse words muttered close to her ear. His breath fanned over her neck, raising goosebumps across the exposed flesh.

“You startled me, that’s all,” she brushed off.

She really wished to be rid of his touch, but she really had no where to go between all her obstacles. He wasn’t making any move to release her, and she wasn't about to forcefully push him off of her for fear of making a scene. Not that there was anyone to witness it. And it wasn’t altogether unpleasant, being in his arms again. She actually quiet liked the warmth his body provided in this dreary section of the library, and she couldn’t deny that having him pressed against her was the most contact she’d had with a man since the last time they’d been together. However, she wasn’t supposed to like it, and her brain was telling her to get him away. Her heart and body protested that decision readily.

“Didn’t mean to, pet,” he told her. He made no move to step away or release her, and her heart hammered in her chest. Him being so close brought up too many memories.

“Don’t call me that,” she gasped. She hadn’t heard the term of endearment in months, and it sparked something in her that was entirely too pleasant for their current situation.

“Why not?” he whispered, his nose drawing gently along the column of her neck. He grinned when she swallowed harshly. “Remember yeh were fond of the name. Or do yeh prefer ‘kitten’? Yeh seemed to really like that one.”

“Harry…” she rasped, her entire body tingling with the memories. Her breathing was shallow and laboured. She felt like she needed to compose herself, but he wasn’t giving her the opportunity to. And if she was being honest with herself, she was enjoying this little scene too much to want to break the spell they were under.

“Or are those too cute for yeh?” he mumbled, nipping at her ear. “Seem to recall yeh bein’ particularly responsive to ‘little slut.’” Harry jutted his hips forward into hers, and Y/N whimpered at the feel of his hard cock pressed against her arse. Obviously he was just as worked up as she was, and she felt some solace in that.

“Fuckin’…” she gritted out, her hands braced against the cool wooden shelves to give her leverage to push back against him. “Goddammit, Harry.”

Harry’s hands trailed down from his grip on her waist to her hips, and his right kept going, tracing lightly against the button of her jeans. His fingers slipped under the hem of her shirt to tease the skin there, feeling her muscles contract against his ministrations.

“Gonna let me fuck yeh again?” he asked, his own breathing harsh to match hers. “Gonna let me play with that pretty little cunt? No one would know. We’re all alone up here.”

His fingers made their way into her jeans and under her knickers, trailing down to the small patch of hair he knew he’d find. Y/N pressed her arse back into him further, trying to give him more room to work, though her jeans were tight and offered limited space. She knew she wouldn’t get any real relief unless they came off.

“Please, Harry,” she whimpered, one hand coming down to grip at his forearm to steady herself.

“Please what, darling?” His lips trailed down her neck and he sunk his teeth into the junction at her shoulder.

“Please fuck me.”

That was all Harry had to hear. He’d been waiting for this for a long time. Months. Since the last time he’d had her. He’d shared her that night, with another beautiful girl who had much more interest in Y/N than she did in him. He wasn’t mad, though. Y/N deserved the extra attention. But Harry was drawn to her in a way that refused to let him allow that be the only time he had her. There was no one else that compared to her, and apart from her looks, he found her fascinating. Sure she was gorgeous, but the dichotomy of her entire being astounded him. How someone could be so studious and innocent and completely unassuming on the outside but dark and enamouring and alluring on the inside. Not saying a person couldn’t be both, but it was unlike anything he’d ever experienced before. And he was definitely into it.

Harry flicked open the button on her jeans and then slid open the zipper. He used both hands to push the material over her hips and to her knees, just enough so he could have access to her. He pulled her hips out away from the wall before undoing his own jeans and pulling his pants down to release his aching cock. The skin was drawn tight and he was already leaking from the tip, so he hoped like hell that she was just as ready as he was. He wasn’t sure if he could take it slow, and they were sort of on a time crunch anyway. While this area of the library was rarely visited and secluded, it would be just their luck if someone wandered this way.

Harry took a moment to admire the light purple lace band of her knickers before dragging his hand across her center, pressing gently into where he knew her sensitive little clit hid. From what he recalled, she was particularly reactive and she didn’t disappoint, gasping and turning her head into her bicep to muffle her moan.

Tugging her panties to the side, Harry could see her already glistening even in the dim overhead lights. He dragged two fingers through her folds, humming appreciatively when they came away slick.

“Already drippin’ for me, kitten? Absolutely fuckin’ drenched,” he muttered before sticking his fingers in his mouth. He swore his eyes rolled back in his head at the taste of her, heady and rich, with just a little bit of tang. As perfect as he remembered.

“Harry…” she pleaded, her voice breaking. Her hips wiggled in her impatience. He’d gotten her all worked up and now he was taking too long. She wasn’t in the mood for teasing or building it up. She wanted him now, and she wanted him fast. She’d been too long without his perfect cock inside of her, and she wasn’t a patient woman when it came to these things.

“Not gonna be gentle,” he warned her, taking hold of the base of his cock to guide to her entrance. He thanked everything he could bring to mind that she was so wet already. Made this whole thing move along a lot faster.

“Wouldn’t want you to be,” she assured him. She reached one hand back to grasp at his hip, urging him toward her. “Now just fuck me.”

With a smirk on his face, Harry slid into her in one long thrust, but the tilt fled from his lips as soon as her smooth, warm, tight walls surrounded him. He grunted and leaned forward to bite at her shoulder, muffling his sound.

Y/N had both hands back on the shelves, supporting herself from the force of his movements. She buried her mouth back in her arm to stifle her groan. God, she’d missed the stretch of him. Harry was the largest she’d ever had, both in length and girth, and it wasn’t exactly an easy fit. But if was such a delicious stretch and he filled her up perfectly that she was nearly drunk with the sensation the moment he entered her.

“Hold on tight,” Harry warned her before starting up an unrelenting pace.

They were both glad for the seclusion of their place in the building, because they couldn’t maintain relative silence even if they wanted to. Even with their methods, their heavy breathing and the slapping of their skin together would have been enough to assure everyone in hearing range of exactly what they were doing. As it was, Harry and Y/N weren’t very good and quieting themselves, either. Their moans and whimpers frequently took on a nearly full volume, and Harry even had to move one hand over Y/N’s mouth, his two first fingers slipping in, in order to keep her quiet.

She sucked greedily on the digits, wishing and imagining that it was Harry’s cock in her mouth instead, which just made her moan more. She sincerely hoped he was willing to take this somewhere more private afterward, because there was a lot she’d like to do that they definitely weren’t going to get done there.

“Such a fuckin’ slut for it, aren’t yeh?” he grunted into her ear. “Can feel yeh absolutely soakin’ my cock. Are yeh a bit of an exhibitionist, pet? Hopin’ someone will hear yeh gettin’ yeh’re cunt pounded. Wishin’ they’d hear my name when yeh moan it out. Get off to this shit, hmm?”

Y/N couldn’t help but nod at his assessment. He knew she liked the thought of fucking in a public space; of the risk of getting caught. It thrilled her and caused her walls to clench. Harry hissed.

“So fuckin’ tight, honey. Gonna make me cum in your pretty little cunt.” He shifted her hips slightly, causing him to brush against a new spot. She cried out above the muzzle of his fingers. “Right there? Did I find your button? Gonna squirt all over me like yeh did last time?”

She hadn’t forgotten about that. How could she, even with her successful attempts at brushing her memory of that night away? It was the first time she’d ever cum like that. Harry and been pounding into her at a similar angle to the one he was at now, and her lips were curled around the other girl’s clit when she’d felt that strange sensation. She’d been alarmed at first, afraid something horrible was going to happen, but when she’d protested to Harry, he’d assured her it was okay. He urged her to let her body relax, and when she did, liquid had come gushing out of her unlike she’d ever experienced before. Both Harry and the other girl had looked at her in shocked amazement before sharing excited laughs and continuing on with their playing. Y/N had brushed it aside at the moment, but expressed her embarrassment afterward. Harry had promised her it was normal and told her it was the hottest thing he’d ever seen, which made her feel much better about it.

So, she was familiar with the sensation now. She could feel it building like a balloon deep inside her, the pressure forcing Harry to work harder through it. His thrusts slowed some, but they kept the same force, willing her to explode all over the both of them.

“Come on, kitten. Gonna make us walk out of here with your cum all over us. Give it to me,” he demanded, his voice deeper than she’d ever heard it. She felt the shudder in his thrusts and knew he was close as well. She just needed a little bit more and she’d fall over the edge with him.

“Harder,” she choked out around his fingers. Her breath was held in her chest, the overwhelming feeling of her approaching orgasm rendering her unable to expel any air. “Fuck me harder.”

Harry growled and stood up on his toes to get a better angle to drive down. He allowed the weight of his body and the motion he’d already set be that last bit of force she needed to finally burst. And he was not disappointed with the results.

He cut off her building scream with his hand to her throat, squeezing just hard enough to temper the sound. He thrust through the cascade of cum her body released, all over his cock and thighs and her own as well. Luckily, their clothes seemed to be catching most of the liquid and not dripping all over the floor, but Harry wasn’t bothered by it much. His mind was much more focused an the trembling of her body as she came and his own release rushing through him.

He buried his face in her neck, giving one last ditch effort to keep quiet. He came until his vision turned white, overstimulated by the continuing contractions of her walls. He didn’t even remember when he stilled, but when he seemed to regain consciousness, they were both leaned against the shelves, breathing heavily, slick with all sorts of bodily fluids. Harry’s hair was sticking to his forehead and he could see where tendrils of hers was sticking to her neck. They reeked of sex, but he couldn’t care less. He was too fucked out to care about anything aside from getting her back to his flat so they could wind down together and maybe go for round two. And three.

“Yeh alright?” he asked when their breathing finally evened. He pulled out of her as gingerly as possible, but he still noticed when she flinched a little. He used the leg of his underwear to clean himself up as best as possible before tucking himself back away and doing up his jeans.

Y/N righted her own bottoms as she nodded. “Yeah, I’m great.” There was a dazed tone to her voice, and Harry saw the brightness of her skin and the glossiness of her eyes when she turned to look at him. He realised he’d gone the entire time without looking at her face, and he regretted it. However, he convinced himself it was just something he’d have to rectify once they got back to his. He loved the face she made when she orgasmed.

“Still hate me?” Harry asked, trying to keep up his cocky, sarcastic front, but it was a genuine question.

Ever since their night together, Y/N had avoided him like the plague for reasons unbeknownst to him. He wasn’t sure what he did wrong, since it had seemed like their night together had gone amazingly, especially considering they’d stayed together in the hotel room for the night after the other woman left, talking about everything and nothing into the wee hours of the morning. But when he’d woken up a few hours after falling asleep with her in his arms, she’d been gone. And ever since then, she’d walked around campus like she couldn’t even see Harry, let alone even knew him. It hurt, if he was being honest, but he’d allowed her the space she obviously wanted while pining from afar. Even though they’d had sex together—rather kinky sex—first, he really did like her. Wanted to get to know her better and ask her out. She’d never allowed him the opportunity, though.

She looked up at him through her lashes, her brow furrowing adorably. “I never hated you, Harry. Why would yeh think that?”

“Kinda acted like I didn’t exist after the last time,” he told her, pointing out the obvious.

Y/N bit at her lip in nervousness before figuring it was best if she just came out with it. “I wasn’t doing that because I hated you. I was just embarrassed. What normal person has a threesome with a guy within a few weeks of knowing him?”

Harry scoffed with a playful roll of his eyes. “Normal’s boring and overrated. Nothin’ to be embarrassed about. Wouldn’t have fucked yeh if I didn’t like yeh, and I definitely wasn’t judgin’ yeh for it, considerin’ I was part of it, too.”

“I know,” she nodded, biting that damn lip again. Was going to drive him crazy. “It was just sorta out of character for me. Well, my more public character, I suppose.” She shrugged. “Was afraid of someone I knew in real life knowin’ my secret.”

Harry brushed her hair over her shoulder and tucked a bit of it behind her ear, flashing her a soft smile. “Your character is whatever yeh make it. Perfectly okay to be all shy and quiet and studious at school and with your friends and be a complete freak in private with the people you share sex with.” His grin turned mischievous. “Quite like being one of the few that get to see both.”

“Yeah?” she asked, looking at him expectantly.

“Yeah,” he nodded. He hesitantly reached out to grab ahold of her hand, sighing a silent breath of relief when she wrapped her fingers around his palm instead of pulling away. “Now, I would really like it if we could get some coffee or tea and get to know each other better. Maybe get some dinner sometime. Go to a movie.”

Y/N grinned at him wryly. “Are you trying to date me, Harry Styles?”

He shot her a deadpan look. “Might’ve gotten to it earlier if yeh hadn’t run away. Been pinin’ like a bloody schoolboy for months now.”

She cooed at him. “You’re adorable.”

He rolled his eyes. “Yeah, yeah. So are we gettin’ coffee or not?”

The smile she sent his way then was bright and full of sunshine. Such a contrast to the girl who’d been asking him to fuck her harder just a few minutes before. He loved it.

“That sounds amazing.”

#Harry Styles #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles one shot #harry styles fanfic #harry styles angst #harry styles au #harry styles blurb #harry styles fluff #harry styles imagine #harry styles oneshot #harry styles request #harry styles smut #harry styles writing #Smutty smut smut

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ayediosmila-blog · 5 years ago

Text

hi everyone i’m mini, i’m excited to play my new muse with everyone! as always, i wrote way to much, welp. if you get through this you’re a champ!

(FEMALE. SHE/HER ) you know MILAGROS VENTURI, right? they’re TWENTY ONE and majoring in SCULPTURE/ARCHITECTURE? still nothing? well, they look exactly like BECKY G, so you can’t miss them. i’ve heard they’re really DEDICATED, but super MESSY too… it makes perfect sense that they’re a AQUARIUS. anyways, if you see them, tell them they left their PHONE in class and that i have it. ( mini, est, she/her, 23 )

Like this and i’ll im you to plot <3

⇢ STATS

FULL NAME: Milagros Antonia Rivera De Costa Venturi

PRONOUNCIATION: MEEEE-LAH-GROSS

NICKNAMES: millie, meels, mil, mila, shorty,

AGE: 21

D.O.B : January 25th 1998

HEIGHT: 5′0

OCCUPATION: barista

ZODIAC SIGN : Aquarius

SEXUALITY: bisexual

NATIONALITY: American

ETHNICITY: Mexican

BIRTHPLACE: oaxaca, mexico

CURRENT LOCATION: new york city, new york / seattle washington

LANGUAGE SPOKER: english, italian, portuguese, and spanish

⇢ ORIGINS

So milagros was actually born in oaxaca, mexico, but she was given up to her aunt who eventually gave her up to the officials.

mila was moved to different adoption agencies, and at two years old she ended up in one in mexico city where she met her parents.

It wasn’t long after until mila moved to the USA, ending up in new york with her new family.

Marco and Claudia Venturi were already parents to 6 boys - who were closer to being men at the point milagros showed up. One thing they didn’t have was a girl, and since they couldn’t get it the old fashioned way, they decided to just adopt instead. They had the means to do it anyway.

Marco Venturi is a retired politician, he’s had a very reputable career, and now since his retirement he works a lot with habitat for humanity and his ultimate goal is for inclusive spaces.

Claudia De Costa Venturi is a fashion designer with a known reputation in europe, her brand DCVenturi became popular in the american market as well

The family lived in New York, New York City most of the time, but both Marco and Claudia wanted their kids to see the world, so they travelled often, and it became easier since a lot of their kids were older, so the only ones that would go where the younger ones.

If you were to ask Milagros what she remembered from Mexico, it wouldn’t be much. Growing up she didn’t feel different from her siblings, and her parents never made her feel like she ever was either. her parents didnt even want milagros to forget where she was really from, so often they would go on trips with her to mexico, and decided to keep her original name.

⇢ BACKGROUND

to this day, milagros hates her long name, it’s super difficult to fill in on documents and it’s annoying when it comes to having fill out forms. She often goes by Mila, but Millie would be the second most nickname for her

she went to the best schools, often private where they had the uniforms, it was sort of a gossip girl situation with her growing up, except she was captain of the cheer team, and she was on other things like track team, prom committee, drama club, art club, music club. she was involved a lot because her parents put her in a lot of extracurriculars out of school too.

because her parents are influential, millie’s been on a couple papers, she loves to get dressed for night outs. fashion week is exciting for her, and she definitely sometimes got caught not in her best by random strangers.

Besides her parents, she’s had to deal with the lives of her brothers, and they’ve all come out successful whether it’s owning a restaurant, being some kind of YouTuber, or even an everyday teacher. not to mention it sucked being the youngest and a girl with so many older brothers.

the Venturi kids had everything at their disposal, and as you can see, millie’s only problem was figuring out what she wanted.

you’d think millie knew what she wanted, right? not at all. honestly for her a lot of what she was doing was bc her parents made her.

when millie turned 18, she decided she wanted to reconnect with her biological parents alone, and as much as it made her parents uncomfortable, they agree to let her go alone. So for a few months, she lived in Mexico, with her cousin because alone didnt meant alone alone lol

millie met her real parents, and that in itself was emotional. for the rest of her time in mexico she learned about the culture, the people, it was a big game changer for her.

she knew that she was different than her family, she saw it growing up, and there ofc were people who would tell her, in a way she went into a bit of an identity crisis.

⇢ POST-SECONDARY/PERSONALITY/NOW

She didn’t want to live in New York much anymore, kinda tired of a super busy city so she decided to go to somerset in seattle washington for sculpture and architecture.

her parents were surprised since millie could have gone to any school in the state, ivy league even.

even if she got into somerset a, she actually deferred for a year, so she’s only been at somerset for 2 years.

millie decided on sculpture and architecture because she lives the idea of designing buildings and homes. after uni she wants to go abroad and help construct homes for those who can barely afford it, or somehow work together with Habitat for Humanity.

in her free time she really likes doing pottery, often you can catch her at uni after hours in the labs doing something.

besides there, you can find her in a coffee shop nearby the university called Second Cup. it’s not like she needs money since her parents fought her to pay everything for her - mila just wanted to work, so she does as a barista and it’s really the only time she’s the most social. catch her doing some cute latte art with your drinks cos she’s bored.

mila fortunately lives alone but she’s barely there, so the living room is spotless but her work room, cos ofc she lives in a two bedroom but she lives alone, sdfkjsadk her work room is what she calls ‘an organized mess’ and it’s where she’ll have her supplies and models.

millie is very much go with the flow and down with everything when she’s not busy working or doing school stuff

she was very much involved in high school, and in uni she’s.. half involved? she’s a part of some clubs but not rlly, most of her time is spent in art labs or sketching in the library

she had a bit of a wild youth, and now she’s kind of chill but if you were to get her drunk, she’s a fun dumb, says really stupid stuff and laughs at everything. she kinda just wants to hug everyone.

ppl call her perfect cos she has money, knows how to do a lot of things and millie hates it bc she has her own insecurities too

sometimes she can get snarky, especially if you’re on her bad side. she loves to argue, and even when she knows she’s wrong, she’s right. no questions.

don’t hate her but she’s forgetful asf if it’s about everyday things.

her favourite holiday is winter, she loves ice skating, snow, hot chocolate, peppermint. catch her apartment already have a christmas tree up while some christmas lifetime movie is on tv lol

she’s pretty much a sweetheart unless you piss her off lolol she’d love to pick someone’s brain over a cup of coffee.

if you give her a reason to dress up she loves it, if she has no reason you can catch her in sweats, especially if it’s cold outside.

when it comes to relationships, they were always hard for her since she wasn’t sure if they liked her for her money, her status or to gain some connection to her family. she’s dated people who are both rich or poor, and so far she’s unimpressed with everyone lol

her friends are.. a lot bc she’s rlly not picky with who she’s friends with when she probably should.

⇢PLOT IDEAS/CONNECTIONS

neighbours!

met at a drunk and turn out to be in the same class

cousin!

childhood friend

exes good and bad

coworkers

could have met in the library,

study group/study buddy

maybe they met at some club

a connection where one is using the other

crush

fwb?

just

evERYTHING

but honestly i want all the plots!!

#ill be back after walking my dog #but here have this #im sorry it's long dfkjghdjgdf #somerintro

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morecolorfulmetaphors · 6 years ago

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How would a world without capitalism look like? Would money be worthless? This is a genuine question, im not trying to contradict you or anything of that sort. I agree that (sorry if its a stupid question, its just that as a gen z child i cant imagine it)

Hi! Sorry for the late response. I’ve been a little swamped with work. 3 It’s not a stupid question at all though! It’s definitely something we’re all still figuring out. Also, I would imagine that any future will be affected by technology that doesn’t even exist yet, so it’s basically impossible for us to know exactly how society would be. For example, Star Trek takes place in a post-capitalism future, and replicators played a huge role in that (where people can just press a button and get whatever they need). It’s possible a technology like 3D printing could develop to have a bigger impact on the economy, but who knows!

As for money, it’s an interesting question. Some people in the solarpunk community here like the barter system, but tbh that mostly just works for one-off trades between two people (for example: I’ll help you pick these strawberries, and in exchange, you bake me a strawberry pie). It would be pretty impossible to apply that to businesses (though, imagining everyone in line for coffee having to barter with the barista is pretty funny).

So money or some kind of credit could still exist. My ideal is that it would only be needed for fun stuff, and that necessities like food, water, shelter, health care, transportation, energy, and education would be accessible to all (we already have free public schools, libraries, medicare/medicaid, etc., so it’s not that radical of an idea).

The thing about money now is that it’s framed as a way to deal with scarcity. In other words, people say there aren’t enough resources for everyone to just have what they need, so we use money as a way to ration it. However, the reality is that a lot of that feeling of scarcity is fake. Artificially created by industry. For example:

-Diamonds are actually not that rare. It’s just that diamond companies keep most of them off the market so that they seem rare, and therefore, they can set the price high.

-There are far, far more vacant homes in America than there are homeless people. Some reports say there are six times as many vacant homes as homeless people, let alone abandoned buildings that could be converted into homes.

-The world already produces more than enough food to feed every person on Earth. Some say we produce two to three times as much as we need.

-“We Could Power The Entire World By Harnessing Solar Energy From 1% Of The Sahara”

So in many areas, we actually have enough for everyone to have what they need, and we don’t need money to ration it. The reason so many people *don’t* have what they need–despite there being enough to go around–is that the companies are driven to do what’s most profitable. They make decisions based on what makes the most money for them right now. And often, helping people is not profitable.

Sure, we could power the whole world with renewable energy, but it’s not as profitable as fossil fuels, so wealthy people don’t build the infrastructure for renewables.

We could invest in better farm technology and infrastructure so there isn’t so much food waste, but then if everything was plentiful, the prices would drop.

We could easily lift poorer countries out of extreme poverty, but then who would manufacture our consumer goods for super cheap?

The main thing is that we need to transition from a system driven by the profit motive (game objective: make as much money as you can, any way you can get away with it) to a system where we work together to meet human needs (game objective: work with your teammates to finish chores as fast as possible so you can chill on the beach after). As you can see from the above examples, we know *how* to meet many those needs already. We just need a system where that’s the goal, rather than profit. Also, like I said in my original post, if our objective is just to get the necessary work done to meet human needs, then a lot of work could be automated (like we automate household chores with our dishwashers, washing machines, dryers, etc.).

Another small example of something I’d love to see in the future: There’s an adorable bookstore in Paris called Shakespeare and Company. They have an apartment on the second floor where anyone can stay for as long as they want, no money required, as long as they help out in the shop for a couple hours a day. Doesn’t that sound delightful?

Jumping off that, it’s good to remember that if people had the basic living essentials guaranteed, so many people would offer even fun things for free. For example, I would love to write books and just post them all online for free. I know a lot of people would do that in their own fields if they didn’t have so many bills to pay. Contrary to what capitalists tell us, most people actually have the inherent desire to create and contribute something to the world. Most of us have some sort of work we enjoy doing, and would do not just for the promise of lots of money, but because we’re passionate about it. Hopefully in the future, we can spend a lot more of our lives on those things. 🌼

#capitalism #solarpunk #replies

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herfiles · 5 years ago

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2020 Dream Board

Here is my 2020 dream board!

1. Hobbies

i am a dancer and it is sadly my last year dancing for my high school competitive dance team so hopefully my college has a dance team, when i visited i did not hear of one but hopefully there is, if not i can always do it on my own time :)

i LOVE photography and i hope to buy my own camera some time so i can continue taking pictures with an actual nice camera and post those photos here to share :D

i have been writing poetry and stories since 7th grade which was a long ass time ago (2014 to be exact) and i have been slacking, i admit i’ve been slacking on my writing but i hope to re-continue some of written works and possibly start new one’s.

2. My YouTube Channel and Personal Blog

so i want to start an official yt channel and actually post videos and do stuff, so i’ll be getting around to doing that, i’ve already created a business email and everything so im excited. yt’s always been a really nice past time and its great platform (to an extent) for content creators soooo hopefully i get around to making my first video soon!

so as you can see i’ve started my own personal blog so i can check this off my 2020 dream board but i’ve always wanted something kinda like this where i can post,share my personal life (not 2 personal tho) feelings, opinions with other people who don’t necessarily know me personally and i can hear what they think and you get the point so this is gonna be fun.

3. Body Goals

so it’s been my goal for awhile, and i’m sure it’s been everyone’s new years resolution at least once to “lose weight” i’ve been on a weight loss journey since 2013, and i’ve been through many ups and downs along the way including two eating disorders (which i am currently in recovery for) growing up i’ve always been on what people now call the “thicker” side, so i want to slim out my waist and stomach and get my booty a little more firmer ig. My waist has slimmed out due to my e.d’s but i wanna do this in a more healthy way.

4. Luxury Items

i have always been a big fan of Coco Chanel, she is such an inspirational woman and i’ve watched so many documentaries about her and i just love her, so i want to buy some chanel products, especially for my birthday. i want to buy a pair of chanel stud earrings for my 18th birthday (with my own money) and possibly invest in a chanel bag and/or the chanel #5 perfume.

5. Piercings

i want to get more ear piercings lmaoo XD that’s it for this one

6. Closet

now that i’m moving away from the nest and going into college very soon, i will be donating a lot of my clothes that i dont want anymore to a goodwill maybe, and that means starting up a new closet, so i am currently browsing and looking around for clothes that are more of my style or really a style that’s more personalized.

7. Tattoos

i’ve been thinking and planning my first tattoo for two years, now that sounds fucking ridiculous...because it is lmaoo XD but i’ve been changing my idea of what i want my first tattoo to be and where i want it and what ink color i wanted it to be but i finally know what i want and where i want to put it so now its all about going in for a consultation with an artist that does best with im looking for and seeing what we can come up with and then actually getting it done.

8. Hair Goals

i’ve been cutting my hair a lot recently so i want to start growing my hair back out now and leaving it long lmaoo, wish me good luck with this one

9. Personal Library

i love to read, so i now want to build a more personalized library of classic books and all of my favorites. maybe i’ll make a whole couple of posts of what’s in it or what’s to come

10. Concerts

there is more than a couple people that i would love to see in concert, so if those certain people do go on tour or hold concerts anywhere near me i def want to go to them, but in general i love going to concerts and willing to go to any concert really with some friends :D

11. Electronics

i knew that you knew this was gonna be on here at some point lmao, well here it is, i want to buy a new phone for myself (also with my own money) and get a pair of air pods and a new laptop for college, simple as that ig. but very expensive so wish my bank account luck!

12. Travel

yes of course this is also on the dream board like the million other girls who make these lmaoooo, but its true i really want to travel and im planning for a trip to toronto, canada possibly, maybe a trip to harry potter world OR disneyland XD don’t make fun of me for these pls

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totoroses · 7 years ago

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i found this lesbian survey and decided to fill it out!

Femme or butch? is this what do i prefer or which i am? im a femme and i have no preference in dating, i’ve been wildly attracted to both and any in between

Do you have a “type”? If so, describe it. the only nearly completely common denominator though my exes are having brown eyes? i have dated only one person who did not have brown eyes. i always feel safer looking into brown eyes then blue. i woudl say i have often gone after the romantic artsy type with good music taste and some kind of signature style about them, ironically none of which drew me to my current girlfriend who i believe is probably defintiely the love of my life

Plaid button-ups or leather jackets? leather jackets! i will swoon over smartly dressed gals in button downs as well as a chill gal in some plaid unbuttoned flannel but the two together make me think of a lumberjack

Describe your style. i usually go for one of two styles- softly dressed forest wanderer, or slightly sassy soft grunge. both include my doc martens, but one is more natural colours and old fashioned dresses and the other is sassy tshirts and 90sish thrift store finds like denim and dark florals

Describe your aesthetic.pressed flowers between the pages of a book on forest spirits, rose milk tea, silver rainy downpours, curly baby hairs, white peaches, a cat sleeping in a library, custard pastries, a circle of mushrooms in moss, opals and furry moths

Favorite article of clothing? my one forever 21 dress ive had since like junior year that i can wear without a bra and it has like a cool cross back i just looooveee ittt, then also my embroidered minty 1930s style qipao sort of dress

Favorite pair of shoes? my doc martens and green chinese embroidered lace up slippers

Current haircut? currently blonde (ugh) and currently my hair falls just past my breasts, the goal is to grow it to my bellybutton!

Any haircut goals for the future? i really wanna get on the thick fluffy bangs bandwagon but i dont think i have the stamina to put up with growing them out again smh

Describe the best date you’ve been on. there was this one date i went on with one of my high school girlfriends where we went to a bookstore and hung out and then stuck googly eyes all over my city on random monuments and street signs, and we also ate thai food and listened to music and it was still one of the most lovely dates. BUT my girlfriend recently visited me in taiwan and we went in a glass bottom gondola ride up a mountain and drank from coconuts and wandered through old streets and had the most amazing tea food with a spectacular view and it was heaven

Describe the worst date you’ve been on. probably the one where i went on a picnic with my first girlfriend who then broke up with me that same day and even though our entire relationship was so awkward and not what is should have been it still hurt so bad

Single? Taken? taken!

If taken, talk about your girlfriend/wife! where do i begin! my girlfriend is a slightly shorter than me girl named lynn who loved korean variety shows, drinking coca cola, listening to cheesy love songs, and playing tricks on people (especially me). she used to be a major tomboy in middle and high school and date all the girls and get slapped a lot, as well as mess with teachers and play pranks on them and steal things from their lunchboxes. more than half of her birthchart including sun, rising, and venus are scorpio, and she wants to start her own streetstyle online brand but has not yet found a catchy brand name!

If single, what are you looking for in a potential girlfriend/wife? :)

Describe your dream wedding my girlfriend says if we get married we need two, a traditional chinese wedding (she is from china) and a western one with a priest since i am catholic, and i couldnt agree more. my dream wedding includes just very close friends and family, extravagant lights and flowers and a reception party playlist chosen by me, catered by the teahouse we went to in taiwan. i know its so silly and superficial but i want the dreamiest dress that i design, wisteria everywhere, and most of all i just want lynn at the end of the alter looking stunning in whatever it is she decides to wear

Do you want kids? YES me and lynn talk about this a lot because we both love kids and both agree on at least 4, no more than 8. and we will share who carries the kids so not just one of us is having our uteruses worn out

If you could live anywhere in the world, where would you live? guilin, china. but its a fantasy. guilin is real and beautiful but chinese laws make it so that even if we settle down there and build a house it cant truly belong to us, and in china you cant have a private business and it jsut sucks because the drema is to live in the quiet countryside with a simple life and beautiful scenery to explore together and with our children

Favorite lesbian movie? i love so many but im gonna go with the handmaiden!

Favorite lesbian novel/story? i havent read nearly enough, but adore all things by malinda lo and julie anne peters! ash by malinda lo is probably my favourite. i have to still read sarah waters though, i hear she reigns supreme

Favorite lesbian song? don’t pull away by milosh ft jviews (the music video is gay at least, i also love hayley kiyoko)

Favorite lesbian musician? hayley kiyoko probably

What lesbian stereotypes do you fit into, if any? mmmm i dont like softball so that doesnt work...i read a lot of sappho though! and i have short nails? and love buffy? are these stereotypes?

Ever been assumed to be nothing more than a gal pal? ugh yes

If a woman wanted to woo you, what would a surefire way to accomplish that? write me a love letter or make me a mixtape about your feleings something cheesy

Be positive! What do you like most about being a lesbian? girls!!!!

Are you more of a cat person or a dog person? cat but i also love pups!

Turn ons? a musical wonderful voice i could listen to and listen to, easy and stimulating conversations, passion for something that lights up their eyes

Turn offs? rudeness in any shape or form, indecisiveness or feigning indecisiveness because you think i want to make the decisions, despicable movie and music taste, smell

Do you usually ask other women out or do you wait for them to ask you? mmmm in the past it has been pretty even. i have learned though that with women it really is a waiting game more than with guys so with my current girlfriend the tension was killing me so much i had to straight up ask her if something was going on and when she said yes she did like me too i was so relieved because she admitted to having not dated anyone since high school (5 years ago for her) and not asking anyone out while at college so if i had kept waiting for her who knows if we would have gotten together!

What is your dream career? i want to be a stay at home mom and author and perhaps an art teacher or preschool teacher on the side if the books dont pa the bills!

Talk about your interests or hobbies! writing and reading and drawing and singing and hiking and listening to music and watching korean dramas and making lists and studying languages

What is the most attractive quality a woman can have? passion, not necessarily in the sexual wya, but passion for something in general. like if she is an actress you see her on the stage and see how into it she is, and offstage she talks about it in a way that shows she is capable of truly loving something so much and seeing wonder in life. or a girl who seems quiet but then when she starts to show you the music she likes she closes her eyes and knows every lyric and has this expression of true passion and love for the music, i am captivated by women who are captivated by the purest elements of life from music to dance to nature

Do you love easily or does it take time for you to warm up to someone? for women, i fall in infatuation quite easily. i was always more cautious with men of course and now i avoid them altogether. but love is something i’ve been becoming more conservative of somehow. i think because i was so hurt by someone before and gave and gave without receiving and im scared of that happening again. i have to be receiving love to give it, thats something i finally can control my impulses over and protect myself from.

Ever fallen for your best-friend? HA

Ever fallen for a straight girl? HAHA

The L-Word: yes or no? (love it or hate it?) heck to the no i couldnt make it past two episodes

Favorite comfort food? macaroni and cheese

Coffee or tea? tea

Vegetarian? Vegan? None of the above? none but i have tried vegetarian before

Do you have any pets? a chinchilla and a cat!

Early-riser or night-owl? night owl

What is your sign? gemini sun, sag moon, sag rising

What is your Myers-Briggs type? INFP

Who was your first lesbian crush? my first serious lesbian crush was on a girl at my middle school who dressed to the nines every day in vintage dresses and sweaters and she flirted with practically everyone just joking around and always had a boyfriend but was just charming in every way. my whoel day would eb ruined if i couldn’t just see her or say hello once, and i thought i was just obsessed until i was like ‘wait what if she kissed me’ and BAM i knew it was a real life crush

At what age did you know you were a lesbian? im not really sure. i identified as bi/pan from freshman year to junior year i think, but then was realizing i definitely had a preference and didn’t want to be with guys in a relationship at all to be honest but even up until last summer i was really questioning if i was asexual, so its been a journey but i think i finally fully realized i am a happy happy lesbian after meeting lynn

At what age did you come out (if you have)? i was 14 when i first told my parents i was bi, 18 when i said im a lesbian

Are you crushing on anyone at the moment (celebrity or otherwise)? just my girly friend

Talk about how your day went i worked this morning 7-11 after only sleeping 4 hours since i got hooked on ‘tipping the velvet’ the bbc miniseries, said goodbye to a friend, had school and did a presentation on how to make rosemilk bubble tea, i ate at a moomin cafe with my coworker, and now am working on homework and doing this survey and putting off my night cleaning duties eheh

Talk about your dreams/aspirations for the future i just want to have a family and to have my books published, thats all i really need. a loving wife, my sister still by my side as my partner in crime, so many children, so many stories finally told that people are reading. i really want to build a lovely house for my family like my grandparents did once upon a time, with secret rooms and unique hiding places, a house they can pass down as they grow up and it can have our lineage. i want to live by the mountains and trees and water, i want to be able to speak mandarin, cantonese, korean, japanese, icelandic, italian, arabic, and polish fluently

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a1-cloths-blog · 5 years ago

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Filthy Genius Creator Aaron Sits Down With A1 Cloths. Talks Fashion Climate, Upbringing, Filthy Genius Brand, Future Plans!

Q: Before we get into the brand, we always like to give our audience an understanding of the Brand founder. So as we begin, who is Aaron AKA Retro is?

Im a 26 year old African-American Entrepreneur

Q: Where were you born and raised?

I was Born and raised in Cleveland, Ohio

Q: To resonate with filthy genius fans, we want the people to have a more in depth understanding of you. So, what was your up bringing like? and how has it molded you into the man you are now?

My upbringing was kind of the typical black middle class up-bringing. I was raised by a single mother who worked hard to make sure me and my sisters had what we needed. I have 5 brothers and sister but I really grew up with 2 sisters. So I stayed to myself a lot being the only boy. I used to listen to a lot of hip hop and watch a lot of bet and MTV growing up. I really started by getting rap albums from the library growing up and I would get albums by artist like Ludacris, Lil Wayne, and Young Jeezy coming up and I started to really love hip hop culture and look up to these artist. I used to walk to school everyday listening to rap music. I always been an introvert I guess you can say. I never had a lot of friends and I stay to my self a lot. I never was really trying to fit in with the crowd, I never cared what other people were doing I just always did what I personally liked.

Q: Being a Cleveland, Ohio based brand , what got you started in fashion, was is it your passion or something you grew to transition into?

Well, My first introduction to fashion was watching rap videos on TV but I never liked to ask my mom for expensive things it didn’t feel right to me. So I would just see clothes on tv and stuff I did not really have many cool clothes. It wasn’t till I was 16 years old and I got my first job at finish line that I really started to buy my own clothes. When I first started working there was around right before the time wale really made the sneaker game popular. My coworkers would make jokes to me because I used to only wear chuck taylors to work. Working there I got introduced to all the latest sneakers and I start spending all my money on shoes and When tumblr came out I was on the blogs heavy looking at all the different cool brands online and I start loving fashion really getting exposed to it on social media. Honestly I didn’t even consider myself a good dresser until I notice people would always tell me at school and people would always compliment my clothes. I started to build a reputation and I didn’t even really realize it because I stayed to my self so much I didn’t know what people was saying about me and I didn’t care. But It really started sticking with me senior year when A lot of people were saying they voted me best dressed and It was all the people who I respected what they were wearing. I wasn’t popular enough to win the actual award lol. About a year later when I was in college I was in business school but I noticed they were not teaching me how to start my own business and That’s what I really wanted to do. So I thought it was smart to start a business to gain experience. I decided to start a clothing line because people always asked me about my clothes and I was already looking at clothes online all day anyway so it made sense. I noticed it was a passion of mine because it was something I was spending a lot of time and attention on in my free time. So that’s how the brand started.

Q: Growing up in Cleveland, its a known fact that only the strong survive, we have many fashion brands come and go, what would you say separates from the others that has help you last this long?

A lot of brands have come and went some people have changed the name of their brands or started new ones or stopped all together. I think What separates me from these other brands and why I have lasted to long is because I stayed focused on the brand and if I lost focus I always found my way back a lot of people gave up on their brands. Another thing that separates my brand is me, I’m the source of the designs. People have always liked what I wear compliment my clothes and that’s why I started this brand. Luckily for me that same energy translates when I go to make my own clothes. People love the pieces I make and they want to wear them. People love my perspective on dressing and that keeps me motivated to keep going and that also keeps this brand relevant. Because of the kind of person I am, I don’t follow all the trends so my brand is able to stay unique but still cool, timeless and relevant at the same time. I can drop a shirt made in 2012 and it will sell out. A lot of brands in the world can’t say that.

Q: As we transition into the brand filthy Genius , when was your brand established?

I started this brand in 2012 and I was one of the first Cleveland clothing brands. It was at a time when being an entrepreneur was not the cool thing to do like it is now.

Q: For the people who might be new to hearing about your brand, what is the meaning behind Filthy Genius?

A Filthy Genius is a hustler, someone who makes a way to live their life in a way that makes them happy instead of living by what everyone else says you should do. I feel like this is especially relevant today. We’re in a new age where we have a lot of people are starting business and trying to make a living off their passions as opposed to the past when the route to success was going to school and get a job. Everybody is a genius in some way everybody has a talent or something they were put on this earth to do that they can do exceptionally better than a lot of other people. When you find your genius that’s what you should be working hard to perfect that’s you gift to the world. The term Filthy is all about abundance. Everybody wants to be Filthy rich and the best way to get to be Filthy rich is by finding and perfecting your genius. It’s not easy It take hard work and dedication you have to get it out the mud then you’re “Filthy”.

Q: Since you’ve been in the fashion industry, what would you say has been your biggest revelation from your beginning, till where you are now?

One of the of the biggest revelations I had was that Fashion and Streetwear is my Genius. When I sat back and realized how many people love to wear the brand and When I noticed the fact that a huge number of music artist who don’t know me at all personally were naturally finding the brand and choosing to wear it in their music videos that was a huge revelation for me. When someone shoots a music video usually they are trying to dress there best and look as cool as possible. It’s a big blessing that people are choosing to wear this brand to look their best. Even when my brand wasn’t known. When I think back on it the first shirt I ever made was worn in a music video. That revelation has caused me to set Very High goals and realize my potential and the potential of this brand.

Q: When it comes to Filthy Genius, what is the message that your are trying to convey to the public?

With Filthy Genius I’m trying to motivate the public and assist in giving people the confidence they need to go after they’re dreams. When you wear this brand, you are labeling you’re self as a Filthy Genius. Human beings are extraordinary. Our brains are powerful beyond measure. We are capable of so much and I use this brand to help people unlock their potential.

Q: Since the establishment of Filthy Genius, what has been your biggest accomplishment that you are most proud of?

One of my favorite Artist who I respect in fashion is an artist by the name of Sauce Walka. Sauce coined the slang ‘drip’ and ‘sauce’ which everyone on the planet is using right now to refer to style. My goal was to get Sauce Walka wearing my brand I literally listen to him when I design clothes. I thought that would not happened until this brand was world famous because he really only wears the finest most expensive designer clothes. But one day I woke up and He shot a music Video wearing a vest from my brand. This was a big day for me because I wasn’t that known and I thought this would happen when I was popular. But no, he was one of the first celebrities to recognize and endorse the brand. And that was so big for me because he has some of the most influence on fashion and hip hop in our culture. Everybody steals Sauce walkas drip. Almost every artist in hip hop has been influenced by him even drake and Jay-Z so for him to wear my brand was so big to me and I will forever respect him.

Q: With the fall right around the corner, what can the fans of filthy genius be on the lookout for?

With Fall around the corner people can be on the lookout for High quality clothes that’s going to make you look good. A few pieces to make you stand out and give u attention. What you do with that attention is up to you.

Q: With the city of Cleveland on the rise, does filthy genius plan to branch out? or is your main focus to still build your following in Cleveland?

Yes, I plane to branch out and get some steam all over the country and eventually be a worldwide brand. We are most popular in Cleveland as we are the leading local streetwear brand in this city. But we also have a Buzz in Houston and Miami right now. I want this to brand to be known all over. I want Cleveland to be proud that one of the top clothing brands in the world was birthed in this city. This city deserves that. I’m not sure if people realize this but we are one of the stylish cities in the world and I’m going make sure we get our recognition.

#Cleveland #Fashion #Streetwear #Creative #Clothing Brand #Filthy Genius

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zillowcondo · 7 years ago

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The Top Things to Do for the New Year

Are you a fan of New Year resolutions? Do you find them easy to stick to? Here are some suggestions for little actions that could make a big difference to your life. These top things to do for the New Year should ensure that you make the most of the months ahead.

Make a Realistic New Year Resolutions List

It’s tricky changing old habits and sticking to new ones. If you simply write a list of negatives that you’re not allowed to do, such as eating sugar then you may be setting yourself up for failure. Instead, create a list of positives that you want to achieve such as drinking a glass of water 30 minutes before meal times. Try to make SMART goals – i.e. those that are Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant and Timely. Tell a few close friends about your goals so that they can hold you accountable for them. Studies have shown that we’re far more likely to stick to a resolution when we’ve mentioned it to other people. It’s generally best to set one resolution only and to stick to that rather than a whole host of goals.

Focus on Healthy Eating

Are you getting your five a day – the minimum recommended intake of fruit and vegetables? It can be challenging to fit so many in but we have a few suggestions that may help. Rustle up healthy and delicious juice drinks to start the day right. Why not try a new fruit or vegetable every so often too. Jerusalem artichokes, Romanesco broccoli or dragonfruit are just a few examples.

If you find it hard to resist temptation when eating out, go to restaurants that only serve healthy food until you’ve achieved your ideal weight. For example, in London there’s Redemption which has branches in Notting Hill and Shoreditch. Billing themselves as the world’s healthiest restaurant, they serve sugar and wheat free vegan food and they’re also alcohol free. It’s pretty tasty and we particularly like their Buff Burger with shitake mushroom, black bean and ruby beet rather than meat in a gluten-free bun with lettuce, tomato and caramelised red onion marmalade. A jackfruit rendang coconut curry was another interesting option, and we finished with strawberry cheesecake and some Bliss Balls – a lovely blend of raw dark chocolate and medjool date truffles rolled in coconut. Their Shoreditch restaurant even has angel wings that you can pose in front of if you’re feeling virtuous after eating there!

Get Fighting Fit

It’s a popular time of year to join a gym but first ask yourself if that’s your favourite form of exercise. You’re more likely to stick to something that you really enjoy. Dance classes such as zumba are another good option for getting fit and they burn a lot of calories too. If you like being in the great outdoors then consider cycling, running or a bootcamp. Break your goal down into small, achievable steps for the best chance of success. For example, if you’ve always dreamed of running a marathon, start by alternating walking and running over short distances before working your way up to hill sprints to build up endurance. High intensity workouts are extremely effective – try our favourite plyometrics exercises if you want to see rapid improvement.

Apply the Pareto Principle

According to the Pareto Principle, 20% of your activities will give you 80% of your satisfaction. It’s also known as the 80/20 rule and holds that 20% of efforts give 80% of results. You might be wondering how this applies to things to do for the New Year – well, the rule can be applied to almost any element of your life. For example, you probably wear around 20% of your wardrobe most of the time. Therefore, think about decluttering your closet and keeping only the most frequently worn items. It’s a similar principle for your home and if you find getting rid of things difficult, ask yourself whether an item is beautiful or useful. If it’s neither and you haven’t used it in at least six months, then let it go. Objects that are in good condition will be welcomed by charity shops and old CDs or books can usually be donated to a local library. You can even apply the Pareto Principle to friendships – spend the most time with those who make you the happiest. We’re not advocating cutting all those who don’t fall into this category but simply focusing on those who are the most enthusiastic about meeting up with you and who contribute equally to the friendship.

Start Travel Planning

Now is the time to plan your trips for the year ahead. Whether you prefer to use a printed or online calendar, we suggest inputting key dates first like national vacations and school holidays. With careful planning, you can maximize your time away by booking off dates either side of some national holidays. Just make sure to reserve the flights and accommodation as soon as possible, since they’re likely to be expensive at these peak periods. Think about the trips that you’d like to make in the next couple of months – skiing is a must for all fans of Winter sports. If there’s a bucket list destination that you’re keen to travel to, start saving all articles about it that you can find online. One of the best ways to do so is on Pinterest, which is a mine of information for travel planning.

Each evening, jot down what you want to achieve the next day. It definitely helps to focus the mind. Don’t beat yourself up if your goals slip from time to time but give yourself a small reward each time you achieve one.

We hope you’ve found these suggestions for things to do for the New Year helpful. Here’s to a fantastic year ahead. What are you planning for 2018?

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