#like obviously i dont think it was all me teaching him stuff but like i like to think that all his questions about like social issues

[gales-boyfriend]

.

[bug-bites]

batfam beach episode?? real not clickbait no glue no borax??

cw: nothing! pure vacation beach fluff (p≧w≦q) also barely proofread,,,

pairing: gn!reader x batfam (NOT ALL AT ONCE.)

characters: dick grayson, jason babygirl todd, cassandra cain, tim drake, damian wayne (all intended to be interpreted as either romantic or platonic unless its damian. ik in some comic runs he's like an adult but hes like permanently 12 in my head and i dont fw that :/)

a/n: im back with a new dc obsession tee hee (soz to everyone who wanted more abt the cod guys or spiderverse im comicsmaxxing and redhoodpilled) will probably make a part 2 w/ bruce, babs, steph, and duke eventually :3c

Dick Grayson haha dick

oh he loves the beach so much

the sand beneath his feet make him feel nostalgic from when he would practice tumbling with his parents in the circus ring i think there's sand in circus rings right? I dunno someone fact check me on that one

the victim of being buried in the sand, always asks for a mermaid tail but ends up with something like massive sand tits (courtesy of either tim or jason), he laughs it off anyways

somehow gets the worst tan lines. He wore a swim shirt one time and never again because the tan lines looked SO BAD which is a total shame because he tans gorgeously

will beg to do play shoulder wars i have no clue if this is the right name, again fact check me for this thing where you get a piggyback ride from someone and you try to knock someone whos also getting a piggyback ride over in the water

you’re on his shoulders since bro is strong asf and you square up against tim and damian

obviously you lose because hello that's damian wayne we are talking about but at least its fun!!

cass and jason are forever the undefeated champions of shoulder wars though, that goes without saying

Cassandra Cain

shes always seen beach episodes in animes that damian practically dragged her into watching so when she gets to actually go to a beach she is so excited peak sibling bonding is dragging your siblings into your interests

loves building sandcastles and writing things in the sand, watching it get washed away, and then do it all over again

hold her hand and jump over waves together on the shore and she will be the giggliest and happiest human being alive on planet earth

but out of all the beach activities she loves beach volleyball

shes actually scarily good at beach volleyball for someone who has never played volleyball before

dick thought it would be fun to teach her and have a friendly match between him and bruce vs you and cass

yeah bruce and dick were COOKED. huffing and puffing like they have a vendetta against the three little pigs at the end of it while cass is like “this is so fun, lets go again!”

ends the day with a little sunset stroll along the shore i need her so bad you do not understand please bbyg ill treat u soooo well

Jason Todd

beaches are fun on paper for him, in person not so much

PERSONAL HC INCOMING! He gets migraines after the lazarus pit so he can only have so much fun before needing to lie face down with his head covered with a beach towel to make everything less overwhelming or he wears sunglasses the entire time

he brings a book to read at the beach and stays in the shade the entire time yes he is that bitch

usually at home in the comfort of his little library he likes to read things that have an impact on him or just stuff that makes him want to analyze deeper. think books like frankenstein, lord of the flies, all quiet on the western front, just generally heavier stuff

but his vacation books? totally different. usually something super light, maybe a shitty romance book that you find in walmart which are clearly just results of book packaging, or a some booktok recommendation he got for shits and giggles because it just was so laughably bad, maybe even a childhood feel-good book like percy jackson or the little prince (mostly just books he would not grieve over if sand permanently got in between the pages)

he tried reading a colleen hoover book once and honest to God wanted to toss it into the ocean HE WOULD HATE HER BOOKS AND I WILL DIE ON THIS HILL

but out of everything he likes watching you enjoy yourself, his book wasnt that important anyways. show him that funky sand dollar you found or that really cool piece of seaglass, he’s probably gonna bring it home with him. a little keepsake along with the millions of grains of sand that never seem to go away

Tim Drake

Burns so easily

At first its kinda cute, like hes asking you to help him get that spot on his back he just cant seem to reach and its just a little sweet moment between you two as you rub the sunscreen into his sore muscles

But then it happens again. And again. And again to the point when he goes up to you, you automatically reach for the tube of SPF 100+ 

I just know his vitamin d deficiency goes crazy

Leaves the beach looking like a lobster, sunburnt, a crazy bump on his head from getting hit with a volleyball, and some god awful sunglasses tan lines

Overall, beach activities are not really his thing bros job is NAWT beach

Enjoys the boardwalk a lot more than the beach itself, likes the touristy stuff but still goes to the beach because dick loves it and he loves his older brother :(

Damian Wayne

i feel like he wouldn’t care too much for typical beach stuff. like at every beach that has sand and decently clean water you can do most beach activities

one thing that is never 100% consistent at all beaches is what lives on the beaches. this boy will spend hours staring into tidepools 

bruce was lowk concerned because his son did not gaf about normal beach activities that kids do but eventually he reached a point where he was like "i mean at least hes having fun and being safe"

i feel like talia would always show him books of sea creatures when he was little but he never ended up being able to see them in their natural habitat someone take this boy to an aquarium now

tells you fun facts about each creature you come across

will scold you if you take a shell from the beach, definitely says some shit like “how would you feel if someone ran into your house and just took your bed?”  based though, leave shells at the beach yall! taking them is like bad for the ecosystem

brings his notebook around and has little sketches of the sea creatures

even though typical beach activities arent his favourite, he doesnt hate it. he likes that he can catch a break from all the vigilante stuff and spend time with his family as a family and not just as a team

loves scuba diving. idk it just somehow makes sense and i think he would look really stupid in a wet suit

also i feel like he would never mention it but in his mind hes fully thinking "this is just like a beach episode" but he would rather die than say it out loud FUCKING NERDDD

[sharkboywrites]

Hello! May I ask for the BG3 gang with an autistic gn Tav who is. Very Very Large but also quite young (think like... Older teen.) who just decides that Astarion/Wyll/Halsin/Gale etc is their new favourite person and WILL NOT leave them alone.

It would be very funny if they just... didn't realise Tav was actually A Kid™ and thought they were just a weirdly clingy grownup. Except Halsin. Halsin would know Immediately.

Inspired by my dumb ass being enormous and this having happened to me irl many times.

Bg3 Characters With a Young Older Looking Autistic Tav

A/n: This idea is so silly I love it. This is obviously written as platonic because reader is younger and baulder's gate characters are older and I don't write weird stuff like that lol although I'm sure that's expected. Also also i did all of them together because I do not have the energy to write sperate headcannons for each of them, dont worry they all get their moment

Gn Reader, Child/teen Reader

This was an... interesting situation

Everyone on the team assumed you were just assumed you were a bit childish for an adult

I mean could you blame them? You were massive, anyone would assume you were an adult

Except for Halsin

He could easily tell your age, but it's something he kept between the two of you, mainly for safety

Halsin takes more of a dad approach if you cling to him

He's very protective of you and teaches you new skills

He also keeps anyone else on the team from hitting on you, for obvious reasons, but wouldn't say why

He's also the most attentive when it comes to your autism, he's always keeping an eye out for you and helping when he can

It took the others longer to find, though

Wyll was the second to put two and two together

Once he realized, he grilled you about why you didn't tell anyone about it

He isn't too harsh though, and takes a more "fun uncle" role

He always makes sure to entertain you, he's the guy who's got fidgets on him just for you incase you need them

He also decides not to tell anyone for your safety after consulting with Halsin, but he does wish you said something sooner

Gale is the second to last to find out, after trying to teach you something about magic

He had questioned why you didn't know any of this, it was supposed to be common knowledge for someone your age

Or someone he thought was your age

He just stared at you blankly for a good minute after you told him how old you actually were

He's more upset at himself for not noticing to be honest

He realizes how that actually makes a lot of sense

Gale, like Halsin, also takes a more fatherly approach

he teaches you things you may have not known before, and is one of the most helpful when it comes to working through your autism

He's a knowledgeable man and can tell what you need, probably before you do

He's very protective, often insisting that you stay out of battles, but it's not like you listen to him in that department

For comedy's sake, Astarion is the last to find out, and he is pissed

He's mad that no one told him, even if it wasn't too long Gale found out and most of the party knew

He looked so dumbfounded when he found out and like Gale, was more mad that he didn't realize sooner

He's upset, but he gets over it quickly after a day or two of snarky comments and like Wyll, takes on a cool uncle postion

The whole party suddenly wants to protect you and it's suddenly become one of their top goals to return you to your parent/guardian if you have one, next to y'know, getting the worms out of your head

If you don't have somewhere to go they may or may not argue on who takes you once it's all over

Generally, you're taken good care of from then on, much better than you were before

Everyone's very attentive to you and tries to be aware of what you may need at any given point

Since they all have some type of trauma, they want to make sure the same doesn't happen to you, especially so young

Being in this situation is stressful for anyone, let alone a child, and a child with a disability

They do their best to make you happy and keep you safe

They may struggle, but they do their best, and now you have people to call family

[b1adie]

looking into it i think yingxing would have been fire hunt. he’s hunt for sure considering his main thing was hatred of abominations of abundance anyway but he was trained by huaiyan who is known as ‘the flaming heart’ on the zhuming. people and heliobi hang out together there. flint emperor is there. they use the flint emperor’s flame to forge weapons. the forge is called flamedisk forge. lots of fire stuff. so if he learned there he should be fire element. also makes sense with blade’s trailer showing that he is the single candle still lit despite the rest having gone out. would be cool if he had bluish/teal fire bc heliobi and whatnot.

i was gonna say something about how his skill could be him like heating up his sword as one would to forge it (but not THAT hot obviously) and now im thinking about how with blade’s skill he turns his sword from black to red? he is forging that thing. also crazy that that sword weighs like 4000lbs and he launched it through the air like a frisbee and dan heng got impaled with it and hardly even stumbled. how strong are these guys. OOOH or yingxing could have a FLAMETHROWERRR thing. he made awesome shit and everyone loved him ok? i know he’s never going to be playable as old man furnace master yingxing but i am just imagining if he was… hehe. arrogant craftsman. god they need to let me see/hear more of him like that. I WANT TO SEE OTHER WEAPONS HE MADE I WANT TO SEE HIM SMILE AND BE PROUD AND ANNOYING!!!!!! OLD MAN NOW!!!!!!

anyways fire/hunt yingxing. imaginary/hunt would be cute and fire/destruction makes sense too and obviously most characters playable paths dont line up with their actual beliefs but idc he seems very hunt to me. i miss him. you guys remember when he said “be careful, high elder, lest you hurt yourself with it.” that was some crazy shit. show me geriatric bladie again pleeeease. blade companion mission better be 6 hours long and at least 100k words and 2 cinematics. i’ll wait. give me his life story all 800 years of it. well i guess that’d be like

age 0-7: love my family. sure hope the beasts don’t arrive!

age 8-15: beasts ate my planet. went somewhere else they are teaching me shit here

age 16-30: i am the best at the shit i was taught. idc that everyone is rude to me about it cuz they can be rude but they can’t beat meeeee 😋

age 31-70: im still the best and now i’m hanging out with my immortal friends yay :) they’re all going to outlive me but that’s for the best i think. Right guys?

age 71-800: Ow ow ow ouch ow. Where the fuck am i btw & who the fuck am i as well. Oh well guess ill stick a branch in my hair

age 801+: kidnapped by robot and woman but it’s fine. girl keeps asking me to play games with her even though i tell her i’m busy cutting my hand off each and every day. beast upon my shoulder saying ‘Meow’ frequently. unsure of the implications of this. robot here sometimes. i like it. woman tells me to stop foaming at the mouth so i do because i respect women. except ONE OF THEM. (can’t remember which one right now). branch growing from my stomach again. not my problem. i will be taking a week long nap now.

but i want 6 hours and 100k words of it with pictures and voice acting as proof.

[narwhalandchill]

spicy take incoming but i kinda wish ppl werent so desperately attached to and protective of this moniker of Great Big Brother 100% Perfect So True And Real when it comes to childe bc honestly. he really isnt (perfect or even that good at times) and to me acknowledging the ways both he and his family (for enabling him) are in some ways kinda just. doing teucer incredibly dirty in the long term but only with the best of intentions in the short term is so much more interesting than just pretending hes a flawless brother?? like it only adds to the drama and irony of it all man like theyre rly so dysfunctional as a family unit its great. even if hoyos likely never exploring that shit in its true depth it still lives rent free in my head for sure lol

like. you rly dont have to turn ajax into some sort of unfeeling uncaring monster of a shit brother to acknowledge that he does, in fact, repeatedly make incredibly reckless and selfish choices during his SQ with teucer and in general by choosing to obstruct the truth of who he is from lil bro so completely?

like this stuff can be nuanced and coexist with his absolutely 100% genuine commitment to protecting teucers bubble of a worldview (and w the theme of childlike dreams and wishes being so prevalent in general who knows what could be cooking w that one in particular) and his loyalty and love for his family without just having to whitewash the dumb shit he does lmao

like just bc hes capable of and willing to face the potentially grave repercussions of absolute bangers (🙄🙄) like teaching an actual fucking child to consider ruin machines fun besties and 100% insta ready to fuck himself up by protecting teucer at the cost of aggravating his still-unhealed injuries from the liyue AQ when dottores abandoned lab turns out to be more lively than expected doesnt. make that choice not a very irresponsible one yall im begging 💀

like. hes the adult here . the entire situation unfolding as dangerously as it does in the factory is Absolutely all on HIM for not being able and/or willing to disappoint teucer by just . Doing the mature thing and sending him away to safety because HES gotten too attached to this idea of being his lil siblings' loyal knight and perfect brother that Always finds a way to surpass the expectations no matter the cost its a role HE wants to keep playing despite the risk

like its So obviously a pride thing for him too and thats so fucking interesting because Of how flawed and questionable the logic is!! like yes he truly cares about teucer and ensuring he has a great unforgettable time during this impromptu escapade in liyue like thats not up to debate but the point im trying to make is that the choices he makes are Still very much intertwined with his ego and overconfidence and not really based all that much on Whats Actually The Best Approach Here. he improvises a way to give teucer the best mr cyclops outing he has ever seen bc HE wants to be the one offering him that experience and ends up biting off a bit more than he can chew and he can only blame himself for that one and This Isnt Fucking Sustainable

like i dont think that makes him evil but i do think it showcases his arrogance and flaws in a very concrete way and is a part of why calling him a perfect brother or at least one without an asterix just. rubs me off wrong lmao

like idk feel free to keep calling him that if its important to u and all if u want idc (and i do to some extent get why this defensive narrative of insisting hes great no issues at all emerged bc i remember 1.1 some ppl acting like hes childcare satan for how he treats teucer lol) but. at least like . Be willing to chip in to fund the therapy teucers going to need for those lifelong trust issues in the future man 💀

Bc Thats The Other Thing. now tonia and anthon i dont consider a part of this bc at least they Know hes in the fatui and hiding the gory details of ur harbinger job from ur baby sibs is like. fair enough and reasonable. but. crafting an Entire different AU version of yourself and feeding it to your baby brother as what constitutes actual reality surely is a choice of all times like ajax ily but genuinely . What the fuck if you were real id throttle you

AND HIS FAMILY ENABLING IT THE ENTIRE TIME ITS CRAZY LIKE. As a person with multiple siblings both older n younger with some similar age gap cohorts involved. God id snitch so fucking fast i dont think ppl rly stop and think much abt how objectively horrifying this shit is from teucers long term pov 😭 in the best way obviously given its fiction like its so scrumptiously awful and dysfunctional .

(& just in general man im just so obsessed with the way ajax 14 basically broke the eggshell of his past life and emerged to rise towards his destiny drowned in the guts and gore of the place and people and community he once called home unconditionally. Bro he fucked that town UP and now his family relations will never ever be the same its so fucking Delicious. those 3 days missing and what followed are just Actually a literal fucking horror movie when you stop blindly stanning our ginger menace, forget ajax' side and take the pov of his family and morepesok in general Why Are People Not Talking About This)

like. its not that i dont understand Why this is sth childe ended up doing as i said Thats The Point. its human. teucer is the only one in the family who wasnt there during that fateful 3 days/months . Like yea anthon and tonia were prolly sheltered from most of the carnage back then too but they still Know where he was sent when he became literally uncontrollable and almost killed the neighbors (everybody & their mom loves demonizing his parents as if his demon spawn ass left them a fucking choice JFEJSJSJSKDKS) . like its at least Known.

but then theres teucer.

And like. teucers the Only one with whom ajax can even pretend to have that delusion (ha) of normalcy and a family that hasnt seen him gaze into the abyss and stare back bloodied and grinning ear to ear . like. hes the only shot childe can have at even playacting some crude imitation of normalcy before Everything and even That comes with an expiration date hes fully aware of. so theres just lies after lies after lies and the fact that even his family just. if not actively partaking in the charade then at least silently allows the entirety of it to happen to teucer whos the Only fucking one out of the loop is just..... dude its not fair on him At All

Misleading teucer THIS much is just. its fucking horrible man but i GET it. thats why its so delicious man i GET it but god its just . imagine being teucer in this situation.... thats his entire fucking World shattered once the truth comes out. Everyone close to him has been lying to him his entire time. They all knew and they let him be misled. Like sure he might be happier Now with ajax dutifully protecting that childhood dream of his but after that. Just. sit on this for a bit. after everything do we Really think teucers just going to understand why it came to be and see it as worth it???? Will he really????

yet at the same time as awfully cruel it all is its just So human!!!!! Its so human of both ajax and his family to use the innocence of the only child that was spared the aftermath of worlds best/worst 3 month abyss training camp to indulge in this flawed false reality where their third son didnt walk into the void and come back hungry for More until only the fatui could take him and even then it only spurred him on further on that path. Like its all an act and a lie and its just. Not fucking fair on teucer but hes still doing it and theyre letting him even tho they Know it wont last theyre all looking teucer in the eye every day and letting him believe like man....

like in both the entire ruin factory sequence And in general hiding the truth from teucer as extensively as childe does hes being incredibly selfish but at the same time its selfishness only rly in the way all people are when it comes to Wanting to be seen a certain way by the ones they love and care about. and thats what makes it so interesting. bc as much as the choices he makes are dubious (or like. this decision makes sense to him. a morally bisexual total omnivore ethics-wise narwhalpilled since 14 who sees exclusively in abyss shrimp colors and acts accordingly) both they and the motivations behind them are also just. So very human ones . as terrible as the implications and eventual inevitable downfall of those choices can (will) be.

like. is it not that much more fascinating to consider all the ways that childe is neither a particularly exemplary nor an egregiously bad brother just one that. Happens to be wired weird in the head and proud and flawed and with a track record of heavily suspect decision-making but that also very much genuinely loves his family man. Like i can love that about him without dismissing the fact that theres parts to how hes treating teucer that 100% can and imo rly should backfire horrifically bc. It really just is that fucked up

hes not a good brother hes Worse AMD better than that and also not alone in this like. his family is an active fucking part of this . But like still . Is he trying his best with his abyss shrimp colored vision ? Yes. Is his love genuine? Absolutely. What are the marks? 3/10 meet me in the office after class mister youre just actually horrible (affectionate) 😭

A perfect brother? Not My Ajax man 🗣🗣 and like theres SO MUCH to explore in that it makes me so sad you just. Never see any of it p much in fanworks bc we all just call him best bro and whatever and thats that like its so sad. this family is terrible horrible awful and no good and they deserve it but also didnt deserve it it was misfortune it was fate it was inevitable . justice for teucer man i need to get him in therapy asap

[munsster]

kurt kunkle and his bimbo girlfriend

A/N: this week has literally forced me to be obsessed with this greasy little slasher (soooooo my inbox is surely open!) (gif creds: @stevesnailbat)

Pairing: Kurt Kunkle x Fem!Bimbo!Reader

Warnings: Spree (2020) related content, kurt kunkle, smut/suggestive themes, MDNI, slasher themes (blood, gore, murder, ghostface), pet names (baby, slasher), cam/stream sex

im sorry but gamer bf x bimbo gf trope is actually flooring me rn

he’s just this greasy little streamer you started watching and you’re this total babe who’s obsessed with him

and you are really obsessed with him

you are literally his Number one fan

if kurt kunkle has 100 fans, youre one of them. if kurt kunkle has 1 fan, its you. if kurt kunkle has no fans, you’re dead.

you plugging kurtsworld96 at any given chance, like he’s so confused the first time he hears you do it, but then he gets so happy and just pulls you in

you being the first one to be super excited about his amount of viewers/followers

a celebratory kiss for ur streamer bf 🥰

also getting really worried when he seems to be in a little bit of trouble (ie cops in the background yikes)

him always reassuring you that he’s fine and he’ll figure it out

you dont know it but he’ll do anything you say, even if it meant turning off his stream for the night

you literally suggested doing cam stuff together before chat suggested it, but now chat is like obsessed with that because theyre a bunch of pervs

you treating chat like a sassy lil mama (“ew! behave yourselves” “ask nicely” “‘put it in her ass’ oh cmon, you know better” “shhh, quit being bratty, thats not how good little viewers get what they want, now is it?”)

youre such a lil price gouger, youre like “okay if someone sends in $50, i’ll let you guys watch us” and chat loves you so obviously they end up doing that

kurt really really loves you, plus you do wonders for his numbers. viewers basically double when he even mentions you

“‘kill your gf’ pfft yeah right, i know all his tricks, i’d like to see him try!” and you’re like in his lap and grinning and he just grins at you and when you turn to face him, he lands a big ol smooch on you

even after months of being together, he still gets nervous around you

and you always tell him to “relax, baby, it’s just me” all while he’s literally buzzing in your presence

he probably likes his hair pulled tbh

like even when you just run your fingers through his hair, he’s purring, he’s so slutty for it

asking him to do skincare/haircare with you as an excuse to take showers together 😝

like of course he’s gonna do it 1) because he loves you and 2) because afterwards, he smells like a candy store

you picking out his outfits because what he wears now is actually a cry for help

no because he would actually let you treat him like a dress up doll

you being really excited about it and telling him to do GRWM and OOTD segments on his streams (which are completely led + narrated by you, but he doesn’t need to know that)

him teaching you how to play video games (even though you already kinda know, you let him have his moment)

you designing the clickbait thumbnails for all of his youtube videos and they’re definitely all sparkly and pink and cute

you begging him to come with you to get your nails done, telling him he doesn’t have to get his nails done, you just want him to go with you

but of course, you convince him to get his nails done (just a basic polish *cough cough* in literally neon green, his choice) and he flaunts it to stream

he definitely makes fun of bobby like “my girlfriend is literally so hot. where’s yours? oh wait……”

and you HATE bobby

you think he’s a bad friend to kurt, but you’d never tell him that. you just scheme like “noooo baby, hang out with me, not bobby” and he’s like okay 🥰

also him being a little protective and possessive over you

like when other attractive people glance at you, he’ll grab your hand or put his arm around you or ask for a little kiss (all of which you do happily)

i love yous are thrown around like none other, and it makes him blush everytime. even when youre just tuning in, if he gets that “i love you, slasher” message, he’ll go red as a tomato

oh that reminds me: youre favorite movies being slasher films like scream and scary movie and american psycho, and he’s not stupid so he definitely senses the theme there

bonus: he definitely buys one of those ghostface masks just to surprise you (and get into your pants)

you offering to help clean his car after particularly gory kills (and he knows ur really good with aesthetics and detail work)

also you cleaning him up after particularly gory kills 🥺

like he’ll come home with blood streaked down his face, and you’re like “aw baby 😟 c’mere”

he LOVES it, he feels like a little puppy dog around you because you take care of him so well

you are all about sneak attack kisses, and he never knows what to do with them, he just sits there and smiles while you hold his face and pecks his lips

bro eventually, he’ll start laying the rizz down on you (and he’s not very good at it but) its so sweet that he’s genuinely trying and happy

like he’ll just spit pick-up line after pick-up line whenever you’re around, and you just giggle and kiss him on the cheek

you don’t even have to ask and he’ll buy you cute clothes. not that he’s insanely rich or like raking it in, but he makes enough, and he will spend money on something nice for you before he buys something for himself

him begging to drive you anywhere and anywhere even though your car works perfectly fine, he just wants to do things for you

also him begging to rig your car with cameras, too, just so when he does have to be in your car, he can still stream

ummm bonus: he definitely sets up a camera above his bed so like not only can he do sleeping streams, but…. you know…… angles 😌

you bringing him snacks and drinks during his stream and he gets the biggest googly eyes

you’ll just walk in in like the skimpiest little outfits, grinning and winking at the camera before giving kurtie a sloppy kiss

yall he’s so fucking dumb (in a loving way), but you’ll get into the car in like the most revealing and tight top and he’ll get all nervous and try to angle the cameras like ‘yall seeing this???’ all while smirking to himself

him accidentally referring to you as his wife on multiple occasions while streaming

letting you put your songs in the queue every so often

bonus: after hearing you play it literally once, his new favorite song is ‘stars are blind’ by paris hilton. that shit bangs and he knows it

him making you a playlist of all his songs (and he actually falls in love when you mention the fact that you listen to it almost constantly)

he actually can’t believe you love him and you’re of fan of his work and you’re actually the cutest thing he’s ever seen (nice tits, too)

it takes a lot of convincing and proof on his part that you truly love him, but you’re not shy about showing it and you’ll prove it to him anytime he needs

masterlist

[rainbow-neko-artblog]

I'm gonna guess it's because it's unclear how much of the child actually remains once their parts are used in a toy. A lot of the toys talk like adults, and also Catnap has committed horrific torture and murder, so there's some basis for the thought.

Personally I think it could go either way but regardless what canon makes clear later (or not) people are gonna ignore what parts of canon they wanna ignore. I do it because the idea of a child doing all that murder and torture makes me intensely uncomfortable.

Also Look no further than the outpouring of love for Dogday and aus rescuing him as evidence of people deciding sometimes canon just isn't totally for them andjsjfkg

TW: Child abuse and Violent Content ahead

I think you're missing the point that people shouldn't be sexualizing kids just because their trauma makes them act less like kids, Which is what people are doing right now and why I am speaking up about it.

These kids- Catnap specifically even, were subject to traumatizing abuse as a child and in toy form. This isn't even mentioning that they were teaching kids advanced subjects in science- possibly to imply that kids that weren't turned into toys became workers for playtime co. Of course he doesn't act like a kid, and of course he does all these horrible things. They were never treated like a kid. They were never taught anything else.

It's horrible and awful for that to happen to a child- but like most (Fictional, this obviously isnt always the case in real life) horror games- when a kid is subject to that kind of learning they repeat what they see. (Ie: Fnaf is also guilty of letting it's fanbase make sexualized art of the animatronics when they ALSO had dead kids in them. Kids who killed security guards in the worst way they could because it was all they knew and they were vengeful)

What specifically irked me and made me remind people that 'hey these characters are kids, don't be gross' is that theres already a massive amount of p*rn of them, and im sorry but i just DONT think its appropriate to be making that stuff, au or not, of a child character. Maybe if the context was REALLY FUCKING DIFFERENT, but a lot of what i'm seeing ISNT DIFFERENT FROM SOURCE. Which is really gross.

I am not sorry when i say that i will be blocking people who are doing it- because I just don't condone it. It's gross icky nasty. They're kids.

[reyislikesotired]

i might doodle smth for this later dont quote me on that and so here is my very self divulging list of:

the batboys with who i would think would make an excellent emotional support greenbean

izuku and tim

probably the most obvious team up but it deserves to be APPRECIATED

tim would prob figure out one for all rq

after seeing the mediocre training, tim takes it upon himself to make sure izuku has a better training regime and diet

they go hero watching and take notes together

the rants they have,,, god tier

izuku sees tims self destructive night binges and is the only one able to get him to sleep without the use of drugs (izuku literally just hid his coffee stash, cuddled up to him and boy was passed out in SECONDS, new record)

dick offered to pay izuku to stay at the manor just to get tim to sleep

collei and damian

its crazy ik but hEAR ME OUT OKAY

damian is a too serious person who i can see loosening up around collei

damian, frustrated after seeing collei not read the information as quickly as him: what, are you illiterate?

collei, sheepish: i learned how to read properly just a few years ago, im sorry

damian, blushing in embarrassment and wanting to now take over her education because HOW-: *proceeds to quickly summarize the information*

after that damian lets collei take her time and even aids her by explaining certain words

collei asks genuine questions and damian answers them almost kindly

damian thought collei would be dead weight but then he saw her shoot an arrow and throw her cullei anbar and was pleased to see she could also throw a good punch

he also trains with her, obviously he has given her some help but she has even given him pointers on how to deal with certain elements and how to treat injuries in the field more efficiently and how to make certain cures and ointments from stuff found in the pantry and outdoors

idk i can just see damian adopting collei and collei just treating damian like the little brother she would dote on whenever she could

tim sees this and thinks the apocalypse is going to start, jason's here just to see how someone was able to tame the demon brat

huohuo and jason

jason and tail teach huohuo how to use a gun

huohuo is close to fainting every time she pulls the trigger and jason is sure to have tea and a spa day planned out after

huohuo texts jason often and jason reassures her whenever she gets insecure about it

huohuo is jumpy 25/8 so jasons pit rage does spook her but she's been with tail all her life, she's used to her life being in some kind of peril; after it, huohuo prob gifts him smth as an apology for the rage even tho it wasnt her fault and jason just protects the lil bean more

gon and dick

gon: so my dad left me to become a hunter so i became a hunter to find my dad :D

dick: oh thats so cute of u, mind if i tag along? i would love to talk to ur dad 😇🔪

BONUS +

zoro and damian

i would really just like to see them talk technique and spar

damian would prob be so flabberghasted at first seeing the use of 3 swords but then sets his whole regime in understanding and countering it

[denny-artsss]

I really like that last idea where he gets to sub her class, can we see more of that scenario?

Jax: *walks into her class and sits at her desk, resting his legs on it as all the students stare confused*

Student: um... that's our teachers desk-

Jax: Well, your teacher is not here. She's sick, so I am the substitute.

Student: are you... even old enough to be a teacher?

Jax: Obviously! How old do you think I am?

Student: I thought you're a 14 year old at best. Considering your childish clothing.

Jax: it's called an ALT style? God, I thought you people are in art school. *opens a random book and tries to read from it, nervously tugging the bunny ears on his hoodie*

Student: so... our teacher- she asked you to substitute?

*Jax having a flashback of Gangle talking to him* "You go there and tell them I'm sick, and the class is off. Got it?" *end of flashback*

Jax: Yeah, she begged me basically because I'm such a good art teacher- I'm always busy with teaching art and stuff- so where did you guys last leave off?

Student: color theory-

Jax: Why the hell do you need the theory of it just color your drawing.

Student: I'm pretty sure it's needed because-

Jax: *interupts him* okay NERD if you're so smart, why don't you come up here and teach it? Oh yeah, that's right, because I AM the teacher, and you do WHAT I SAY.

Student: ...

Jax: Okay, let's see um- how about- a creative exercise- *reading from a notebook he found in her desk* draw the thing you hate drawing the most- and study why you hate drawing it- did you guys do this before?

*they all shake their heads*

Jax: Okay, then this is it! Start drawing! *looks over at them drawing until one of them catches his attention* why are you drawing your teacher? You hate drawing her?

Student: yeah.

Jax: why is that?

Student: I can't stand her.

Jax: *tries not to laugh* That's not very nice- *bursts out laughing and tries to seem serious*

Student: she's failing me just because I'm not paying attention. It's so stupid.

Jax: I never pay attention to her either. That's why I'm here today. *walks back to her desk and waits for the period to be over*

* Bell rings, and class ends as he walks out of the school, hearing a car door open*

Gangle: *holds it open for him* I swear if I get fired because of you, I dont know what type of crime you'll become victim to my hands.

Jax: *gets in the car with her and buckles up* Geez Gang relax. I just looked over your notes and taught them something from there. I'm not as incapable as you believe I am.

Gangle: it takes a lot more to be a teacher than just teaching one lesson. It's about how to act and make them behave properly.

Jax: *laughs* you sound like your mother.

Gangle: *drives home* never say that again.

[moescaria]

Hi! I started following you after developing an obsession over our favorite weirdo, Shiryu. So if you dont mind me asking, do you have any personal headcanons for him?

Ohhh, wow... I'm so flattered that you think I'm qualified to give headcanons, but I'll throw some your way! - For real-world nationalities, I think he would be Japanese and Eastern European/Russian, since he's referred to as Shiryu (Japanese) and Shiliew (couldn't really find much on this name aside from stuff with the suffix -ew, which allegedly has roots in East European countries and Russia... I know Shiliew is the stupid version of Shiryu but let me live. I definitely don't think he's 100% Japanese and couldn't decide). In terms of the OP world I think he's from Wano (like everyone else's headcanon probably). - BLONDE HAIR UNDERNEATH THE HAT! Also shaves pretty much every day and never has stubble. I think he is pretty on top of his hygiene in terms of shaving/body hair... I've never seen someone in the military with a beard so I'm pretty sure he needed to be cleanly shaven (notice how hes cleanly shaven in jail too! Force of habit after he was imprisoned). - I think he likes to sit on his big couch with a glass of whiskey and listening to rock on a record player... white dad style! - Obviously has that lingering smell of tobacco... to a degree you wouldn't even imagine. As soon as he walks in the room it hits you like a ton of bricks. I have a headcanon (with a few others) that he isn't even fully undetectable when he's invisible, since he reeks of tobacco. To a lesser degree ... he smells like leather and always kinda smells a little like sweat (HELP). I don't think he'd use a very strong cologne and if he does its sooo overpowered by the Pungent tobacco... yuck! - (sorry for this one) Has a bit of pudge on him... I mean look at the shape of the guy! He was sitting on his ass on level six for a while without training (and slides my own lore into this headcanon... my oc Freya is a cook at Impel Down and brings him big rare steaks at least once every day while they're both there... feeding him well). Has a big ol' tummy. Love! - Probably really tense from wearing that heavy ass jacket for like... twenty years and is sooo grumpy about it. You already know he just slumps down on the couch after taking off his coat and kicks his legs up with a big harumph. This being said, I like to think he wears nothing but a white beater and those green-ish pants underneath that uniform of his!

^^ Following up with the uniform thing... he definitely doesn't train with that heavy ass jacket and gloves on so his hands are pretty rough and calloused. After the time skip when he starts training extensively again he loses a little weight (boohoo). Can't decide if he takes off the hat when he trains but I don't think he's Shiryu without the hat. Can you picture him training, all out of breath and he reaches for a cigar... dude you're a loser actually - Another shared headcanon with a few of my friends, and one of my favorites... I think he talks to Raiu, to keep it brief. Sees it—or her, in his words—as his companion. The thrill of the chase is a feeling that will never get old... he expresses his gratitude for his beloved katana in its strict up-keeping (which we saw in that little scene with Shiryu and Laffitte)! He loves his sword more than the air he breathes... probably the most (and only) honorable trait the man has as a swordsman. It's something that grants him so much power... Raiu's seen it all! - Again, another shared friend headcanon (shout out... heeyyy... kicks my legs cutely), Laffitte and Shiryu have a rather interesting relationship as Teach's right-hand men. Surely, there's reasons why Teach has Laffitte as his Chief of Staff, and Shiryu's allegedly the strongest (aside from Kuzan probably)... after that scene in Zou, tell me there isn't some sexual tension. What were they doing, what did Burgess interrupt..? Can't get too far into this without having a stroke, but they have the dynamic of an old money couple. Each has the other wrapped around their finger... it just works. ANYWAYS. Hope these will suffice... dms are always open for discussion since I'm really not trying to write about Shiryu dick and balls on the tl LMFAO... happy to see he has fans, though! :-)

[ask-carmenpondiego]

Chapter 26: Timey Wimey Time for a New Era

“Its not a damned crush. I swear you busybodies have nothing better to fuckin do. Get back to whatever the fuck you were doin!” M exploded, the faintest blush upon his cheeks as he stormed off to his room, slamming the door. Wally shrugged, “Ah he’ll get over it! Its not like its his first.” Daring and Kiros looked at each other with a questioning look, Daring asking, “Dad, has he done this with that other girl Molli?” He thought back for a bit, “My memory that far back is a bit fuzzy still but I think that was pure hook ups to appease her or using her as a vent for frustration. I dont remember him being that tender to anyone really. But then again like I said, my memory.. aint what it used to be.” Kiros hmmed a bit and shrugged, “I think I’ll see what he’s up to, maybe he just needs a bit of a chat and not bullying.”

Daring raised an eyebrow. “Like bro bonding time? You have already known him how long now?” Kiros chuckled, ruffling her bobbed hair, “Just because we’ve been teammates for a couple decades doesnt mean I cant check in on him. He’s usually a loner out of all of us. He probably feels a bit of pressure to get you up to speed on things.” Daring scowled, thinking. “I think you should let him cool off for a bit. I know you have some high security access, you could teach me a few things. Plus he still kinda creeps me out.” Kiros laughed, “Him? Other than the horror show wanna be vibe, he’s a big grumpy softie. Come on, I’ll tell you more while I show you more of the research lab and library. You’ll need to know how to access the good stuff.” They headed out and Wally sighed, scratching his head. “Well.. it sure is more quiet around here.. its like a mini vacation.”

It in fact was not quite like a mini vacation. That night Wally tried cooking a meal for everyone… which turned out completely inedible. And the cabinets above the stove also became a charred disaster. For the entire month, everyone had some sort of take out as the kitchen was slowly repaired like new. Daring was actually learning the ropes and liking it, as the month flew by, once planning a heist of her own and borrowing her mother’s coat and hat. As luck would have it, the TARDIS showed up shortly before and a blonde maned pink earth pony mare stepped out in a bit of a baggy coat one would see from a thrift store, with a mechanical component and an odd looking sonic screwdriver. “Right, hello. I’m the Doctor, I returned with that thing you needed for your portal door.” M, being skeptical, gruffed, “What the fuck happened to the older silver haired gent?” The mare chuckled, “Oh, thats me, new face. I was forced to regenerate but thats no big deal right now. Lets get you up and running finally, yeah?” M crossed his arms after showing her the way again, narrowing his eyes. “Bah.. too cheerful. I was amused by the bickering before.” The mare Doctor shrugs and begins to tinker about the console and installed the component, buzzing her screwdriver here and there. “Yeah well, times change and so do people. I bet you could change too. Always so angry and cold. You should find someone you like and I dunno. Have a date! Or just hang out. Something with someone you dont mind spending time with, doesnt have to be romantic.” M snuffed in silent retort, looking away as she mentions dates and such. “I have no use fer that fuckin stuff.” The Doctor got up from being on her back and under the console, dusting herself off. “Aahh, I see that eye avoidance though. You thought of at least one person you would consider. Obviously you dont have to, I’m not going to force you. You do what you want. You know you best.”

M rolled his eyes and went over to the console to inspect it, “So is this ready to go? We can open portals and not be fuckin flagged or seen? No beacons or flares or anything?” She shook her head, “Completely off the grid! Now when you see Carmen again, tell her that she owes me one. We aren’t even fully yet! She still owes me from stealing Sexy from me twice!” M scoffs, “Eehh you know Red, she keeps her word, but she is a bit of a weird monster fucker.. I suppose Police Boxes fit that category some fuckin how.” Daring walked into the mech lab with an oversized red trenchcoat and hat. “Are you sure I need to wear this? Didnt she have a smaller size?” She sees the Doctor and blinks, “Oh, I’m sorry, I didnt realize I was interrupting something.” The pink mare beamed, “Oh my gosh lookit you! You shrank! No. Not shrank. You’re not Carmen. Who are you?” Daring kept trying to adjust the hat, “I’m her daughter Daring Do. She calls me Adora.” The Doctor beamed more, “Oh that is stonkin!! A family heist then?? Is it your first one? Oh you’ll have fun! Ol Marehem here will keep you safe. I’ve heard a lot about you and your brother. I hope to see him someday! For now, I do have to run. Just call if you need me!” She had looked at her watch and was already half in the TARDIS before Daring got anything out to say.

M snorted a bit, “Liked the previous Doctor better. More realistic and not so… chipper.” Daring pointed to where the TARDIS was already faded away, “Did I just meet the Doctor? She’s kinda all over the place, isn’t she? Is she always that hyper?” M threw up his hands, “I don’t know, they’ve all had their fuckin hyper moments. Especially when they are fuckin easily excitable. Anyway, lets get this fuckin thing started up. You said you want a heist on a different Earth if we got this running before yer mom got back. Sooo.. Where the fuck you wanna go?” He took a closer look at her and gave a face. “What? Do I disgust you or something?” She huffed. He reached into the shadow and pulled out a fake horn and a brown wig. He fixed the horn to the hat and plopped the wig onto her head. “She hasnt been seen since the accident, so no one knows her change in appearance. She is fuckin self conscious of what the media says, so put this on and from security cameras, you should look spot on.” Daring scowled as she adjusted the wig, “Why would it matter if we’re going to another world? And where did you even get this stuff?” M planted the hat haphazardly onto her head, “Hey, I dont ask where you get your fucking audacity but here we are.. just fuckin use it, and we’ll go from there. Its all her fuckin image reputation shit.. Alright, call yer troops and let’s head out fer yer first heist.”

Daring smirked, “Right.. um.. Oh one more thing to bring.” She had him follow her to the loot storage and pulled out a rolled up tapestry from a museum from their world’s Italy. “I saw that Mom already nicked this one. What if I play a prank she may appreciate? What if we switch the tapestries? Another Earth is sure to have one like this as well? Right?” M took a look at the label Carmen had made for it and he chuckled. “Ya know, I think that would be rather hilarious. Probably against her wishes of letting this go to the hands of someone she doesnt know but, then again, we are fuckin providing her with a technically more rare one. I’ll run it through 079 and see if there is another one of these elsewhere in the fuckin multiverse.” He scanned the tag from his phone and shortly 079 brought up a result and even more information.

“So the tapestry you were seeking is from Earth N37FL1X, it was in display in Italy just a while ago. Mostly populated by animated beings called humans. Very basic species, not very colorful except in culture and language.. and there are reports of what looks to be a young Carmen in her 20’s running about, stealing from an Organization called VILE, oh what a coinkidink and is pursued by a policing agency called ACME. Sounds familiar. Currently if you leave now, I can set the date to when they are in pursuit in a place called Moscow, leaving this Italian museum open for your little field trip.” Daring smiled, “Sounds good! Wait.. why am I excited about that?” M puffed on his cigarette and grins, patting her head, smooshing the hat a little. “Because you just made a basic plan of action and its working in yer favor. Yer mom gets the same way, must run in the family. Now, next thing to do check what kind of other security is involved. Just because this ACME group is preoccupied, doesnt mean the rest of the world is unguarded. 079, can you get the layout deets fer that fuckin museum? A simple fuckin sneak and steal should be an easy first heist.”

Later that night, Blendin came in exhausted and covered in glitter. “Ugh.. I am never doing that again..” He paused as he closed the door, “Hello? Anybody here?” The house seemed very quiet. Asta and Ninoga were off for their anniversary, while Drake and Vasha were off on their own air pirate adventures, Molli was glued to her phone with earphones in, and Wally left a note saying he went shopping for snacks. Blendin had texted Daring and she hadnt responded back yet so he went to a wall display and checked the rosters, finding out Daring, M and Kiros went off world and Skyggja and Sigryn were in their lab. Blendin almost had the whole house to himself. He went to his room and flopped into his computer chair, turning on his gaming tower, and putting headphones on his head as he grabbed a game controller.

He was just about to start a game when a soft set of black pawhands covered his eyes. “Aah! You’re getting fingerprints all over my glasses!!” He exclaimed, hearing laughter from the young sphinx, “Ty! What are you doing here? Arent you in Guardian training?”

The sphinx teen hopped onto Blendin’s bed, his adult coloration coming in finally. He was a little more filled out muscle wise than slender Blendin, since he was part of the wrestling team. His fur becoming a soft midnight with a slightly lighter brown stomach, his humanistic parts were still a honey brown, his human features becoming more of that of a handsome middle eastern man, though still lingering in the awkward teen stage. His black hair was resembling more of black iridescent rooster feathers as was his chest fluff and tail tip. His eyes were a golden honey color, and he was wearing a simple blue tunic and khaki board shorts, sandals on his feetpaws. “I’m done with training, I graduated top of the class and was even given the choice of my Librarian to guard!” Blendin hung the bulky headphones around his neck and turned his chair to look at him, “Thats awesome, dude! Who are you thinking of picking? Is it Emily? Please dont say Emily.. she is sooo insufferable with the fairytale sector.” Ty laughed, shaking his head, “No, I think she’s allergic to cats anyway..” Blendin raised an eyebrow, “You sure she aint just sayin that because she’s a Mouskin?” The feline smirked, “She sneezes all the time around me, I’m not picking her. I was actually wondering.. if perhaps I could pick you.” The young stallion tilted his head curiously, “But I thought Guardians and Librarians often become lovers. At least I think they used to-“ Blendin blinked as Ty suddenly was pressing his lips to his, their first kiss.

After a moment the kiss broke and both boys blushed, Blendin smirking, “Wow. How am I going to refuse after that??” Ty laughed as he leaned on the headrest of the chair, “I was thinking of maybe having a code name Wonderland. You know, Lion and the Unicorn?” Blendin snickered, “Are you calling me fat? That unicorn eats all the sweets while the lion wins the fight.. if anything you have more meat on your bones than I do!” They laughed and Blendin rubs the back of his head a little, “So does this mean that we’re a couple now too?” Ty shrugged. “I was thinking about leaving that part up to you, if you’d have me.” Blendin felt his cheeks blush even brighter than before. “Hells yeah!! I mean..If you want to, I don’t mind..” Ty laughed and ruffled Blendin’s hair, “I wouldn’t be asking you out if I didnt want to!…is.. is that glitter? Why are you covered in glitter?” Blendin gulped and shrugged with a grin, “Fairies?” Ty raised an eyebrow, “As much as that tracks, try again. I know your recent missions were not involving fairies.” Blendin sighed defeatedly, “Okay, fine, but you can’t let anyone else know… its kinda embarrassing.” The Sphinx crossed his arms, “Dude, I’ve seen you after taco tuesday when experimenting with tofu and bean burritos. There ain’t nothing I haven’t seen you do for some fuckin toilet time.”

Soon the date came by that the wives were due to arrive back. A new tapestry hung in a display in the loot storage from Daring’s first heist and switch, the kitchen was restored to near mint condition, and M was relaxing by the pool, a large dunking device sitting next to him. The device’s long arm was dunked in the deep end, the subject tied to was bubbling and thrashing for a good few minutes. The changeling didn’t seem concerned at all for their breathing. He reclined, arms resting behind his head, eyes shut behind some sunglasses, yet he was still dressed in a full black and dark teal suit. He crossed his ankles, his fetlocked hoof tapping the air as if he had a song stuck in his head.

Kalai had wandered down the stairs from the main floor, since the pool was currently residing in the open basement looking out towards the ocean sunset. “I thought you were going to meet us at the entry point, Mr. Tall, Dark and Moody.” She shapeshifted her clothes to be more fitting for the poolside, a golden bikini with a sheer hip wrap. M raised an eyebrow and smirked. “You gave me a date. Not a time. Besides, I got… distracted.” He nodded towards the commotion under the water. He looked at his watch and stood up, “Pardon me a moment..” he grunted, stepping on a pedal that lifted the device’s arm, showing a very disgruntled and soaked red changeling girl, Molli. “Now what have we learned about putting C4 in Red’s room while she was gone??” Molli writhed against the ropes and spit out curses at him, “Fuck you! You’re an asshole! She’s no good for you and you know it!” He stepped off the pedal, careening her back into the water, “Correct observation, wrong fucking lesson..” he chuckled as he resumed his spot on the lounge chair. “Should I even ask?” Kalai chuckled. M lit a fresh cigarette and shrugged, “Neh, just a crazy jealous ex who thinks every woman is out fer my cock, which is fuckin hilarious since I haven’t fucked in like two hundred or so years. Just ain’t interested. And who told her it was only women? There’s other people out there who would love a piece of this.” He gestured to his crotch with a small hip-lift and took a slow draw from his cigarette, Kalai shifting her weight to one hip and curiously tapped her finger to her chin. “Well, is it just women for you?” He let out the smoke in a steady blow, shrugging. “Since forever and fer now, I guess. Never bothered to want to explore it. Broads feel comfortable fer now but what really tickles my fancy is seeing who is stronger. If I can overpower them, I can control them and break them, feed off them. If they are stronger, I respectfully know my place.” Kalai smirks, nudging his legs over so she can sit on the edge of the lounger, receiving an annoyed flash of a sneer before he readjusts himself to let her sit. “So whats the deal with your sister in law then? She’s obviously weaker, or was for as long as you’ve known her, yet you treat her as equal or higher.” M gives off this groan of uncertainty, “Neeehhh its.. complicated. We found common ground and common needs that we could help each other with at the time and it just went from there.”

“She outsmarted you with logic?” Kalai chuckled, raising an eyebrow. “What? Fuck no. It was just a deal to help each other out. And she just kinda grows on yeh. She’s very persuasive.” M grimaced and scoffed at the audacity of the notion that he could be outsmarted by a simple mortal unicorn. “Well then what about me? Where do I stand?” She leans closer to him, batting her eyelashes. He looked over his sunglasses at her, looking her up and down before leaning his head back. “Eh.. hard to say. I recognize your powers differ from mine, yet are extremely similar. Not quite eldritch as I like to describe it. You do surpass me in power levels, but that could be due to age and experience easily.” She cocks her head a bit, with a confused gaze, “Are you calling me old? I’m not even middle aged yet!” M smirks, “I call it how it is. Yer older than me and I’m fuckin old compared to the fuckin morons on this planet. To me, you don’t look a day over 1,000.” She smiles, “So what you’re saying is you like older women.” He sits up and looks over his sunglasses again, “What I’m sayin is that I know my place around you and I’m comfortable with that.”

She smirks with an upward chin tilt and stands up, stepping on the device so the arm lifts Molli out of the water, coughing and sputtering. “And you were comfortable with leaving her underwater for this long?” Kalai sends out her vines and unties Molli and holds her, wrapped up like a python. She brings the little changeling closer to try to soothe her, reaching out a hand to brush Molli’s face. Molli in return hissed and shifting into a viper and bared her venomous fangs and was about to strike Kalai. “You will never sssteal him from me!! I will make sssure you dont sssee another sssunrisse!!! DIE!!”

M ripped off his sunglasses, seeing the fangs and noticing her particular venom, he turned himself into shadow, within what seemed like milliseconds if not instantly, took hold of the captured viper from the vine’s grip and forced her to her true form as he solidified, slamming her against the wall by her throat. His body suddenly bigger, and more monstrous, almost hulking with multiple limbs, most thin and spindly like spider legs, caging around them. Tentacles swarming as three sets of insect wings splayed open, his face almost looking skeletal with multiple glowing eyes, green with shades of red, bared down upon the offending changeling who clutched to the claws holding her throat, her hooves kicking for some footing to stand on, her own segmented eyes filled with absolute terror, he slowly growled at her, threatening sounds of his chittering sounded in the back of his throat.

“DID YOU LEARN NOTHING WHEN I THREW YOU TO THE SIDE CENTURIES AGO? AND YOU DEIGN TO RETURN TO ME AND THREATEN WHAT I HAVE RIGHTFULLY EARNED ALL BECAUSE I DO NOT RETURN YOUR AFFECTIONS? LET THIS MOMENT SET THINGS CRYSTAL CLEAR. IF YOU REMAIN AT THIS DOMAIN, YOU WILL CARE AND PROTECT YOUR TEAMMATES AND HOUSEMATES AS FAMILY. GENUINELY AND WITHOUT SEEKING REWARD. I TIRE OF YOUR GAMES AND HAVE WORN OUT MY HOSPITALITY AND PATIENCE. CHOOSE YOUR PATH TONIGHT. IF YOU CHOOSE TO CONTINUE THESE GAMES, I WILL DEVOUR YOU COMPLETELY WITH NO REMORSE. YOU WILL BE SPARED WITH NO ILL WILL IF YOU STAY AND CHOOSE TO TRULY BECOME A VILE AGENT OR IF YOU CHOOSE TO LEAVE YOU WILL BE SPARED BUT NEVER ALLOWED TO RETURN. MAKE YOUR CHOICE BY DAY BREAK.” Molli nods panickedly as he lets her go, dropping her to the floor and turning back towards Kalai, almost instantly back to his normal form, straightening his tie and putting his sunglasses back on, striding towards her. Molli ran back upstairs into the rest of the house to think about what she needs to do next. Kalai, on the other hand, watched M with his hulking form while biting her knuckle, her legs crossed tight. She stands to meet him as he returned towards her, her tail swishing a bit excitedly. “I apologize that you had to see that. Are you alright? Did she bite you at all?” He took her hand, examining it. Kalai let him hold her hand, a deep blush spread over her face as she looked into his shaded eyes. “N-no. I’m very fine. She didn’t bite me. Even if she did, it wouldnt do anything to me. Hell, I’m still holding and processing your brother’s disease in my own body so I can cure it fully. That is proving difficult but its not impossible.” She shifts the shape of her own body, as if dropping an illusion, her body riddled with small crystals ripping through her flesh before putting the illusion back on. M frowns, shaking his head. “I know you are helping but endangering your own life like this, you’ll run out of time.” Kalai laughed, “No I won’t. I’m practically life and death incarnate. This cannot harm me like it does your brother. So be at ease. I have it handled. Just like how you handled that girl back there.” She looked past him at the partially cratered wall. “That was impressively sexy by the way.” She reached up and fondled his tie within her hands, looking up at him. “Wut, That back there? That’s not supposed to be fuckin sexy..” M gave a questioning look, before she pulled his tie, bringing him closer like a leash. “Shut up and take the compliment.” He growled close with a smirk. “How about you shut up?” She grins, daring him. “How about you make me-Mmmh!~” He didn’t let her finish her challenge before his lips locked with hers, his hands wrapping around her hips. She melted a little as they kissed, her hands on his tie still. She pulled away first, softly giggling. “Touché.” He smirked, “So, did I do it right?”

“Do what right?”

“Did I seduce you?”

“You are how old and you forgot how to seduce?”

“I didn’t forget!!”

“You did! You totally forgot how to seduce a woman!”

M huffed. “I can seduce any woman I want!”

Kalai slid her neck to the side, “Then why did you ask?”

“I dunno, Red makes it look easy! And I tried being, I dunno, fuckin coy or something!”

“How can you forget how to seduce?! Its like forgetting how to eat!“

“Look, I don’t think you are aware, but I don’t like actual food.. like ever.”

“You don’t like food?”

“I can fuckin absorb emotions, why would I need food?!”

“Its called fun!”

“I don’t need food for fun..”

“And this is why you didn’t get laid for the past 200 years.”

That night, everyone had sat down for a well deserved home cooked meal by Carmen and Lekir, and a few more settings were placed for the new visitors. A Dragon King named Anorath had joined Carmen and Lekir for dinner along with a Lizard woman named Celica and the black and green Vixen Kalai, who had chosen to sit next to M. A fourth individual was also welcomed to the table, sitting by Daring. A tall and slim Kirin teen with some wolf like features, about 18-19 years of age. His long mane was an arctic blue while his fur was white, a single blue curved horn jutted from his forehead as much smaller horns ran along his hairline. He was exceptionally pretty, as Daring couldn’t take her eyes off of him. Instead of a normal Kirin tail, he had a canine one, yet still had the cloven hooves with long blue fetlocks. He smiled and joined in conversation, one would notice his teeth were also canine.

As Carmen stood to help serve the food, she clinked a glass for the undivided attention of the table. “All right, settle down, I know we’ve been gone a long while, longer for us than most you, but I wanted to say how glad we are to be back home! I wanted to thank Anorath, Celica and Kalai for helping us during this whole endeavor! And I wanted to formally introduce a new member to the family. Not new to me and Lekir but new to you all.. ya know.. time travel..” The table chuckled, and she continued, gesturing over to the Kirin teen, “I’d like you all to meet Aciano. He is our son. Lekir and I had a baby apparently. I have also updated my birth control to be strong enough for this demon Jirvi-Ketsru blood I have, since thats why this happened. My old birth control was not strong enough for my body anymore. So yeah. Thats fixed now. Um, so Aciano is going to be staying with us, he wanted to go see this world and see if he is interested in any special talents he may develop here. He’s a bit shy right now but I’m sure he’s grow into his place here with no issues.”

The table erupted into welcomes and laughter, Daring somewhat dropped her shoulders, “He’s my brother?! I got two brothers now? Dammit, I was hoping he wasn’t related!” Kiros nudged her with his elbow, chuckling. “That quick to change crushes?” Daring sputtered and glared at him, “What?! Psh.. No… what? Mm-mm nope. I have no idea what you’re on about.” Carmen smirked, “I just wish Blendin was here to meet you. He’s been rather busy with his Librarian duties. Oh! That reminds me, Adora, theres a magic show in town this weekend. Why not get aquatinted with Ace and show him around, you’ll have a blast! I just know it! Aaand I hear the magician has a new assistant you may like. I hear he’s your age and already has quite a following on Tik-Trot.” Daring blushed bright red and slouched, hiding in her wings. “Mother!! Stop trying to set me up with random boys! I’ll pick someone when I’m ready!” Carmen blinked, thinking she was mistaken, “So sorry, Would you rather me see if theres any girls you may like instead? Just let me know if thats what you prefer..” Daring hid more in her wings, groaning. “No Mom! I like boys but I don’t need any help finding anyone! Fuck!” Carmen raised an eyebrow, “Adora Knapsack Yearling! Language! We have guests!!”

M piped in “Oy, Red, give the kid a fuckin break, yeah? She pulled off a hell of a first heist while you were gone. Give her some slack. And mind you, she was the FIRST VILE agent to go across dimensions for yer precious loot. I’d say she deserves extra dessert or somethin!” Carmen beamed, “Thats absolutely wonderful news! Absolutely she can extra dessert! And You can help her write up the report after dinner.. which by the way, M. Hand me your plate, I’ll put it in the cupboard for you.” M scowled, in mid reach of a plate of stuffed artichoke. “Um why the fuck would I do that? I’m eating right here with the rest of yez.” Carmen smiled wide, motioning to Kalai, “Oh Kalai and I had a nice conversation about dinner and how you dont like food in general. So I’m not going to force you to eat if you don’t like my cooking..” M stood up, insectoid chittering could be heard faintly as his ears pinned back, “What the absolute fuck? I never fuckin said I didnt like your cooking! I just dont eat for fun! Appreciating the hard work of a home cooked meal is a whole ‘nother fuckin thing entirely!”

Carmen slow blinks at him, and gestures for his plate again, “And your appreciation is noted and welcomed, but I won’t force you to eat if you don’t like to eat. Now hand over your plate.” M scowls and keeps his hand on top of his plate. “Fer fuck sake, Red! I want this food! Yeah I can fuckin absorb all yer good feelings and shit but I like having fuckin solid food too even if I don’t need it to survive!”

Kalai smirked at him, “So what you’re saying is that you do like eating food for fun? You keep falling for her logic, I can see why you see her as an equal..” M glowered, “I will find where you fuckin sleep and I wont even bother making it look like an accident..” Kalai just leans towards him with a grin. “Mmm. Kinky.”

[noctilu-uca]

I feel like everyone know about that one line in own stage but like.............. Hear me out.......... Ik a lot of people are like "hes talking about sasara !!!" BUT what if in some magical way that line was about himself....

"We are like the moon and the sun As always, we move in opposite directions Many moons ago while watching TV Sometimes remembering back then To memories burning with emotion, say goodbye Now I won’t think back anymore; never looking back Those happy times have passed, but I feel I’ll be alright Occasionally his dazzling talent seemed to completely eclipse me Like being overshadowed by his shine before my very eyes I didn’t get it I, the moon, wanted to be like that sun Instead I should have been chasing my own dreams all day Now that I’m moving on, it’ll be okay Even the moon can be beautiful sometimes, right?"

THIS CHUNK IS WHAT IM TALKING ABOUT AND WHAT I WILL BE FOCUSING ON !!! Rest of the song idgaf about for this post

ok so like obviously he is talking about sasara for a good portion of this verse by referring to him as the sun and all but i feel like a lot of people are overlooking roshos development as a character. His whole character is that he detatched himself from sasara and focused on himself instead of trying to pursue a life by his side. HE STILL WANTS TO BE WITH HIM !! Im not ignoring that one glory or dust line.... But for the most part rosho sees himself as seperate to sasara so as to not drag either of them down, letting sasara boom as a solo comedian and letting himself find his new passion for teaching !!!

The line in question im yapping about is "Even the moon can be beautiful sometimes, right?" which for people who dont know is basically a love confession i dont wanna get into it BUT ITS A LOVE CONFESSION !!! And ive seen a lot of people use it for sasaro art and stuff which isnt bad Be Who You Are but also............. What if hes talking about himself ??

The lines that build up to it are strictly talking about roshos realizations and healing process from his time with sasara. Even with a few lines recognizing the fact that we will be okay without sasara there and that he has moved on from those times.

Basically what im trying to say here is that i think this is a confession of self love and appreciation. He refers to himself as the moon and uses the line "even the moon can be beautiful sometimes" guys he is saying that he himself is beautiful in his own way and that he doesnt need anyone else to prove it for him I LOVE ROSHO

[monosanimegenericzone]

Hunter x Hunter

yall think that everyone from meteor city can use rhythm echo or was it *just* canary.

like it would be a skill that the less fortunate would use to

canary technically comes from an era post-troupe reformation so its likely she has to dodge a lot more shady people but like.

would it be too unreasonable to say that silva saw kikyo use this technique and decided to have her teach it to his children and eventually had him going back to meteor city to collect more people who knew it so that he could monopolize the power

but then what if it wasn't exclusive to the people he singled out.

do you see where im going with this? yes im implying that most if not all phantom troupe members are capable of using rhythm echo but because they are fighting against practiced nen users the technique is basically useless. even so- it seemed to work on the few that weren't expecting it.

like feitan, obviously. yes he is the type and even in the chimera ant arc we saw him use at least *some* iteration of it. i would guess that people like nobunaga and machi know it too since they are extremely practiced in technical know how and martial arts.

kortopi too, i suspect. he has no need for it since his power can just clone himself anyway- but imagine before that.

im nerding out about stuff that was discussed years ago but im rediscovering it and its driving me insane.

another possibility is that its a transmuter only ability and ive just been lying to myself this whole time. we dont know canary's nen class but im willing to bet its transmutor.

[acidsaladd]

incoming rant abt a possible ninjago atla au u have been warned

the gist of the au and what i have in me head is that lloyd is the next air avatar but for some reason the air nomads are skeptical/afraid of baby lloyd so misako takes lloyd and skidadles far away from the temple. because of this, lloyd grows up as a regular kid with no air benders around to teach him air bending And no knowledge that hes the avatar (and therefore that he can bend the other elements)

fast forward to when hes like 9?? 10? wu finds him, surprise ur actually the avatar its training time something something big spiritual evil that might be related to garm something something then wu Leaves and so the training bit falls onto the ninja. which. none of them is an airbender mind u and lloyd Still doesnt know airbending. so they teach him the other elements and Hope that he somehow learns air by proxy

i have a very small and not rlly thought out idea for what an equivalent of the aging tea could be but this is basically it in terms of bg and going forward its just ur usual avatar and ninja shenanigans

ok. now. i have a couple ideas for why the air nomads could be wary of lloyd. one is that they know garmadon is his dad and garm has been cursed by a Particularly Evil spirit and so they think evil dad equals evil son and they dont rlly wanna deal with that so they r like we must get rid of the child he will reincarnate either way its no biggie which,,, uhh yea lets not

the other one is that the nomads have discovered that lloyd is going to be the first avatar that is a direct decendant of the first ever avatar (the fsm) and so they want to like?? harness his power or smth idk.

(the only problem with these ideas is that it kinda relies ok the air nomads having kind of violent and evil solutions to problems so i stil. dont rlly know 😭)

the point is!! one way or another, misako starts seriously fearing for lloyds life and the fact that he might not ever have a choice over it as his own so she takes the baby and Runs.

[abt the fsm, raine lowkey gave me this idea entirely so shoutout raine hello but i was thinking that theres two of them. like. u have the FSM, the first ever avatar, all plwerful godly being. and then u have the dad, the f in fsm stands for Father, this guy is just wu and garms dad. i dint have much else thought out for him just. yea]

now. if i want to talk abt the possible aging tea equivalent i need to talk abt garm. soo augh idk abt garm but i think rhe gist of it is that hes been possessed/corrupted by a spirit bc of a deal he made or for messing with a spirit when he was researching things. the point is hes known as this being that brings chaos and stuff but then wu and misako reveal to lloyd like, thats ur dad actually, and misakos being researching ways to bring him back and lloyd stumbles on this research and decides (not so smartly) that if one qants their dad back one must do it himself so. he manages to contact the original spirit that garm annoyed

so they talk and the spirits like "well i Would give him back but he kinda made me lose my time and energy on him for like,, 4/5 years so unless u figure out a way to give me rhat time back i aint giving him to u" and lloyd goes bet take does from me no biggie

so then lloyd makes this deal not rlly knowing what hes doing and he goes back to the real world and suddenly he has a brand new dad and also abt two whole heads more in height woops

(this all happens post training arc starting so lloyd already knows the ninja and has been living with them for a while)

OK NINJA TIME

so ive been Rlly debating whether i should do the Usual thing and just stick em in the element rhat they have in the show. OR (and this is the idea im leaning more towards) i go with vibes. obviously the vibes are still informed and consider their element in the show

ok first kai and nya. i want them both to be fire nation buut idk if i should make them both firebenders or make them have their usual elements. i do wanna let nya be a waterbender, However since they do live in the fire nation (most likely in a more rural town far from the mainland) nya would be a waterbender that uses mostly firebending styles and techniques. i just have always found this type of mix and match they do with aang and zuko specifically SOO COOL i love it so im gifting that to nya

cole is an earthbender obvi. i havent rlly thought much abt cole bc i immediately decided he would stay an earthbender and didnt question him further.

NOW HEAR ME OUT HERE. i kinda rlly want to make jay earth kingdom and leave him as a non bender. why??? bc the Vibes man. i want to rlly focus on his engineering and tinkery side. i think he would still be rlly involved with bending and stuff and he tries to find different uses to bending outside of fighting. maybe him and cole are childhood friends and jay is always bugging cole to try some of his projects with coles bending.

and finally zane!! hes water tribe but i struggled to settle him on either tribe. i think the northern tribe could fit him in the future but i do think he's originally from the south. i feel like the south gives him more potential to be the specific brand of Peculiar that zane was in the beginning of the sbow. and since this is situated pre war, the southern water tribe would be bigger and better off than how we see them in atla so it would be cool to explore that

so im picturing him as the weird son of the local medic and whatever else dr julien gets up to . so maybe dr julien is teaching zane stuff and he gets Rlly Rlly good so they send him to a bigger settlement with better teachers and eventually he decides to leave the south pole to continue learning and stuff.

i do have ideas abt how wu gathers them together but ive ranted way too much so i will make another post on that if i remember to

[theaviskullguy]

D&D Obey me- Lucifer, Mammon, + The Twins!

@trash-opposum here you go. seperate post so people can find it but here!

Disclaimer, if i do the rest, im going to avoid making EVERYONE a tiefling or aasimar, those are just for who i think are exceptionally appropriate/is how im playing them as my current dnd character is just Belphegor. If yall want me to make the others (Asmo, Levi, Satan, maybe Diavlo but who knows) let me know!

so let's GOOOOOOOO

Lucifer

Aasimar, the kind from Mordenkainen so no special extra type

Noble background, mainly cause i cant think of anything else

As for class, we have four potential options

Two varieties of Paladin, cleric, or warlock

First paladin variety- Oathbreaker

In this case he was probably originally Devotion before the revolution, and whoops! Oath Broken!

It'd either be a point of pride for him ("I fought for what I believe is right, and there is no shame in that") or he'd hide it from everyone

Second paladin- order of the Crown! obviously because of Diavlo. fellas is it gay to swear undying devotion to your future ki- *gets shot*

Cleric, then Order Domain. clerics are sworn to gods and not demons but shush his patron might still be Diavlo. in an actual D&D setting i can see him instead swearing to like Tyr or something.

he wont be healing. clerics are tanky he's out here ordering people to drop their weapons and then fucking murdering them

Warlock, gotta be fiend patron. im not sure if its possible to be your own patron but itd be funny as shit. worse case its fiend patron with some flavor homebrew as i call it to literally just be a fiend in his own right climbing the infernal ladder as he levels up

i promise the others wont be as long

Mammon

Earth Genasi as those are descended from the Dao, which are the greediest genie. Also, they just look rich with gem-like stuff growing in cracks on their skin you just know Mammon's one of them

Charlatan background. he is scamming people left and right and it works

Rogue, thief subclass. Honestly any subclass other than Arcane Trickster (hes not smart enough) or Scout (hes not equipped for the "outside of civilization" shit)

Unlike for Lucifer, the others have Backstory! Woo!

Mammon is the son of a Dao and a human. His human parent helped him escape from the Elemental Plane of Earth, but then he was left on his own

So. He quickly learned how to con people. At first it was for survival, and then greed.

He found Lucifer while running one of these cons. In particular, his "con" was a vanishing act. He claimed he could become "one with the earth" when really he was curling up on the ground and casting Pass Without Trace. Lucifer saw through this illusion and threatened to out Mammon as a conman, unless he joined him as his ally. So, he did.

Lucifer keeps him in check, but that's not to say Mammon isn't fully on the straight and narrow

Beelzebub

Tiefling!!! variant tiefling favored to have fly wings.

Outlander background, ill explain why in a sec

Barbarian. Need I say More?

actually i will- Totem animal, spirit of the bear. Since bear gets resistance to all damage (other than psychic) while raging and i feel that works with Beel more than anything

now for his backstory! he isnt canon in the campaign im playing belphie in but his backstory has the same catalyst. When he was five years old, the kingdom he lived in was caught in a rebellion against a tyrant. In which, Beel saw his older sister get killed by a royal guard. Belphie was going to be killed- but was protected by a tiefling in a knight's armor (my previous character who was killed. rip avi)

Beel, in his five-year-old mind, just ran. He took off without a second thought- a decision he now regrets deeply.

He ran into the surrounding woodlands. And gets an Atalanta-style backstory. For those who dont know, Atalanta was a princess who was abandoned in the woods and raised by bears

So Beel is raised by bears. Which is way better than being raised by wolves

They teach him how to hunt, gather, and its all well and cute. He sometimes entered the rebuilding kingdom to trade in leftover meat for clothes and weapons- and, to try and find Belphie. No luck.

Eventually, Beel grows to be a powerful warrior. Hangry, sure, but his rage hold the rage of freaking bears. so keep him fed. please.

Anyways Lucifer and the gang (everyone minus belphie) encounter Beel in the woods, watching the cubs. Beel agrees to adventure with them. He says goodbye to bear mom and promises to visit- hopefully, with his twin, next time.

Belphegor

hehe its ME

Zariel Tiefling but i dont give a shit about the infernal legacy its just There. tail is a cow's tail he basically just looks like his demon form

Hermit background. again ill explain in a sec

Druid, circle of stars! to people about to scream "i just checked the wikidot why he no circle of dreams??" because that doesnt have to do with dreams and sleep as i wished it did. its the obligatory faewild subclass. i hate the faewild subclasses (other than the bard one that ones fun)

Currently n the campaign im in we're level 5, so his two wildshapes are wolf, and a bull. But he also has his three starry forms due to being circle of stars.

now. backstory! strap in this is Long

he's saved by my previous dnd character- Avi- and is taken in by him and his husband when the rebellion was over.

Except. due to seeing his sister die and not seeing his twin after that, Belphie assumed the worse and thought that Beel also died and he was the last one of his family

He fell into a pretty deep depression and had no motivation to do anything besides sleep, cry, and eat very tiny portions of meals.

eventually his adoptive dads start telling him stories. and. surprisingly. they seem to help! Belphie is still a shrinking violet but he eats more and can cook and do basic chores!

And Then Avi Goes Missing

His husband- Skull- asks the now 11 year old Belphie if he wants to come along to find him. Belphie declines, saying he needs to get in control of his life and some big quest is probably just gonna leave him with more trauma

Skull lets him stay home, and gives him one of his feathers. So if Belphie ever needs a hand, he can call Skull over and. well. have one of his dads at least

For five years, Belphie took to studying druidcraft, and the stars. He also enchanted his favorite pillow to float and be able to carry him. So he had a little more comfort when going out to buy groceries. He'd make detailed star maps to sell in return

When the sun rose on his 16th birthday, he left a note at home saying he felt ready to tackle his own destiny, and left.

He had a brush with Lucifer, but not Beel. so close, buddy.

Anyways he arrives at The Hunters Guild, finds his parents again, and takes residence in the observatory, where he studies his stars and druid magic again. But also, sleep and dreams.

and. yeah thats where we leave off! god that was long im sorry

[sassykinzonline]

Going off on a tangent (I’m lowkey obsessed with your blog so now I’m going to yell my thoughts at you)

I get so disappointed at the lack of any lore drops between Naruto’s heritages like obviously the uzamaki’s were exploited and basically had a like genocide (Karin’s backstory had me so fucked) and maybe it’s to show how normal it is in shinobi society to just brush anything under the rug when it comes to genocides and systemic issues which duh but I wish I could’ve seen more nuanced stuff like diaspora between the few survivors of lost clans, how they survived or heck how they try to preserve their culture.

Idk maybe I’m not making any sense but as someone who has like no ties to my origins (AA, especially growing up to ppl denying AA culture and how AA culture gets sold) I wished I saw that kind of relatability in Naruto since he himself is basically separated from his culture and didn’t even know who his parents were I feel like that could lead to some like deeper stuff. I feel like Naruto would try to preserve his cultures and clans (he does in way ig in boruto but I barely seen that anime and that’s a whole other discussion with how clans are treated)

And in a way I guess it’s the most realistic part of Naruto like yea the ppl in charge might give a nod in acknowledgement of how they were bystanders and that the system failed ppl (if they even go as far as to accept that) it’s just to make the ppl they exploit/ed shut up and be happy that they were even seen in the first place (working class, blm, Palestine, Native Americans etc)

But god do I wish Naruto dived into the isolation of the lack of culture or even the lack of your own ppl can have.

first of all thank you for your support and engagement, it gives joy. feel free to yell at me whenever, i have a naruto so im used to it.

this is also something that used to upset me and now just frustrates me. i technically wasnt the last uchiha until after the war, but itachi and i couldnt communicate, madara cut ties with the clan, and just like me obito left the village as a child. one of the worst things about the genocide was this crushing anxiety of "what will become of our history?" i was old enough to have pride in the concept of "uchiha" but too young to have a meaningful understanding of it. and i guess deep down thats what contributed to my steady depersonalization and increasing franticness-- i knew there was really nothing i could do to preserve my clan so at least i needed to preserve their honour (and this was also why i understand itachi's reasons for not sharing the truth).

all this to say, my heart breaks for naruto because he doesnt even know what he doesnt know. and like you said, thats mostly a function of how konoha chose to operate. i still dont understand why they couldnt at least tell naruto about his mom. i dont understand why jiraiya didnt come back to teach him sealing. but i do know why and its because the shinobi system works best if you dont see yourself as an individual first. everything you are and have needs to belong to the state, and if it doesnt, then they will eliminate it. konoha took advantage of the genocide in uzushio to essentially traffic their women and then say there was "friendship" between the two villages...then do nothing to preserve the uzumaki or uzushio history. disgusting.

youre making sense. ive actually thought that naruto's case is similar to children from asia who were trafficked and brought to western countries post-war, completely removed from their culture and often neglected and abused for a culture they couldnt even own. i think the uchiha are a bit similar to african americans given the systematic lack of consideration for contributions to the development of society, the war between respectability/assimilation and self-determination/anti-discrimination, and like you said the commodification and demonization of culture. and i do agree with you about naruto, but i think it also helps him sometimes. for better or for worse hes...simple. he doesnt think too much about things he doesnt know, and that helps him get through his days with less of a load. he does have his bad days, where hes...lost, but if he were any other way he wouldnt be naruto. luckily the boruto versions of us arent real, but even then i think they make sense given what they were trying to accomplish with that show (ie. dumb down everything for the Manly Men who didnt get what was happening the first time).

when i was traveling after the war i did try to do some preliminary investigation into existing uzumaki refugees and diaspora, but it was a bit difficult though due to their history. ive been thinking about putting together an extended campaign and mission for us to reunify the uzumaki, for his birthday. i just need to figure out how best to go about it. keep it a secret between us.