#like idk I literally don't care if I'm mutuals with someone??
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lastoneout · 1 year ago
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tbh with tumblr rolling out the new notification system that explicitly tells you if you're mutuals with someone or not I think we should take this time to stop making such a big deal out of "being mutuals" in the first place and reintroduce terms like "friend" and "acquaintance" into our vocabularies
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ilovecoffeeandchemistry · 23 days ago
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ooooh i woke up in a bad mood and it's so hard not to be a bitch about it
#i don't want to ruin the mood for my family so i'm just laying in my bed and think about everything that pisses me off#and i'm getting more and more mad about it#come to think of it it's kinda funny but also really frustrating#i probably just need to cry because i've been extremely tired and stressed for the past week#but i don't want to make myself sad on purpose so now i'm really angry over literally nothing lol#for example today i saw my colleague and turns out she knows my father#and she was like 'oh your dad really misses you!! he mentions you all the time!!' and i was like '....really?.....'#because i thought he didn't care at all (and the feeling is kinda mutual)#because call me crazy if you want but if i miss someone i just go talk to them.... problem solved........#we barely talk but apparently he's yapping abt me all the time to everyone so everyone thinks that he's oh such a loving and caring dad#which makes me look like a bitch of a daughter#which is like#on one hand i couldn't care less#but on the other#why would you talk about missing me to other people and bever bother to try and talk to me yourself??#though i probably dodged a bullet#talking to him is extremely hard because he's incredibly stuffy? boring? english doesn't have enough words for that#and i don't wanna listen to him talking about himself for 2 hours straight without having a chance to interrupt him 🤩🤩🤩#ooof#idk how to stop being mad i probably need to distract myself somehow#anyway there is probably a ton of mistakes here but i'm too lazy to fix them#idk i wish i could scream so loud that every bad thought in my head would disappear forever#i'm so tiredddddd
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byanyan · 9 months ago
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i love when people like ur promo and then don't even give u a full day to take a look at their blog so u can decide whether u want to follow them or not... when they're the ones who don't provide mobile friendly info options
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thursdaygrl · 1 year ago
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morning 🫥
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niallandtommo · 2 years ago
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#sometimes i go through my following list and i get a little emotional lol#i still follow a lot of old mutuals who haven't been on here in like literally 4 years#idk why i still follow them but i just can't bring myself to click on that unfollow button#and i just looked at a bunch of these blogs and I'm just like#how did these people go from being on tumblr all day every day and loving this band and these boys more than anything to niall who?#like some of these people used to be on tumblr 24/7 and then they just. moved on i guess? how does that even work lmao#like even all these big popular niall blogs that everyone knew back in 2014/15#all of them just. left#haven't heard from them in years#i still follow a few people on instagram#but i don't think they still care about 1d or what the boys are doing#and like it's fine! obviously#i'm just confused dkfksf#like how do you move on from this#how do you spend every day on this website for years and then you just. stop#how can you be so obsessed with someone for years and now you don't even know that they released a new song#like yes I've had a lot of hyperfixations and i moved on from them#but most of them only lasted for a couple weeks and it was never on a one direction level lol#but i know these people spent years on tumblr in this fandom#they made gifsets and everything had a bunch of friends on here and talked about one direction 24/7#and now. nothing#idk i'm rambling lmao#it just baffles me that some people go from one extreme (being completely obsessed) to another extreme (not caring at all)#anyway i should go to sleep
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honeyydrunk · 9 months ago
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NOW this is a very niche problem but i don't care!! but i am sick of these y/n rejecting the guy whenever he's like flirting or smth. ill genuinely get so annoyed whenever i see a smut post and reader y/n is like being sassy against the guy's advancement. like haechan or someone will be horrendously flirting and the reader will be like "yeah im never having sex with you," UHM¿? WHAT? I WOULD NEVER SAY THAT. tf you mean y/n? idk who this PERSON is but any neo remotely alludes to a sexual encounter and i am already on him. genuinely y/n declining is CRAZY. we have a whole tumblr acc and are searching for smut fics tf you mean the reader in the story is being oblivious and refuses him!?!?
ME? ME PERSONALLY? ! id be doing everything for those neos. id start a ridiculous self care regime just to be so hot for them . eating cranberries and pineapple, my fruits and veg NO UNHEALTHY FOOD HERE. drinking 5 liters of water a day or smth ridiculous. hitting the gym get my stamina up 💪💪😤. paying 700 or smth for laser to make that pussy HAIRLESS. ripping my whole uterus out getting rid of periods and pregnancy. making myself as available as possible. maybe even becoming an sm trainee to get their plastic surgery u know. id be improving my life becoming the best version of myself studying, getting rich, severe self care, JUST to be amazing got those neos tf?
i am NOT declining anyone's advancements i am not playfully rejecting anyone. i'm the one flirting, i'm making advancements.
those text posts where the guys are sex addicts and the readers like "bro ur an addict" MAN IF I GET A HINT HE WANTS ME, IM THERE !! im the sex addict w them atp
i want to see a reader hopelessly delulu batshit crazy for these hot talented men but bro doesn't confess bc obviously fear of rejection u know maybe just once we get mutual pining mutual downbadness
LETS REFLECT THE DEMOGRAPHIC HERE we're not rejecting anyone, we are literally actively searching for smut fics lets be ridiculously real rn !! pick it up !! (ignore these tags i'm being silly and ridiculous)
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magicxc · 6 months ago
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Frenemies
Pairings: Survey Corps - people they cannot STAND
Word Count: 1076
Warnings: none
A/N: Idk man I love a good tussle jskksks. Like give me two characters who absolutely hate each other! And with AOT I really don't have to look too far, yay. This is basically canon but it's funny to think about so here it is as well. 
Headcannons Masterlist
Eren  - Jean, Weak People
I think the Jean one gets over exaggerated a little, and for good reason too, cause the girlies be EATING with those tropes. But at the end of the day they have a mutual understanding and are cordial at best. They're mostly cool because they share mutual friends and spaces but it’s no longer beef per se. 
Hear me out, I don't think anyone wiping out 80% of humanity is willing to kick it with people who aint about it. Mans need someone who’s willing to stand on business behind him. Even throughout the show he’s always admitted to not liking people who’s willing to live like “livestock.” So this is not to be confused with physically weak people by the way but psychologically weak people. Essentially Eren has beef if you’re willing to take it lying down. 
Levi - Zeke
Listennnn I LIVE for their fight scenes okay lmao. Like it's almost always on sight for them and their lil jabs at one another? It’s chucklessss for me omg. Lets be clear, their beef is absolutely warranted. It can be safely argued that Levi doesnt really care for most people but Zeke?? Oh baby its all smoke for him. 
Erwin - The Government 
I swear if it wasn't for the literal fate of humanity and his brewing theory Erwin would've just said fuck it cause baybeeee, they wanted that man GONE. They've tried to get him fired, pointed guns in his face, and built a whole ass guillotine to unalive him; in front of the entire town mind you. Maybe that was the custom back then I don't know. I don’t remember Erwin outright saying that he doesn't fuck with the government but fuck it, I’ll say it for him. Cause I'll stand ten toes down behind this one here. 
Connie - Ymir
I promise you I let out a nasty ole chuckle at the thought cause he don't even dislike her fr fr. I think it's a situation similar to Eren and Jean's in the sense that their friends and environment often see them in the same places. Because if we’re being real, not only do they have little in common but they just don't really vibe like that. I think they could've been a little more cordial but Ymir be on her own timing and it's usually at the expense of the squad. Like when she made fun of Connie for suspecting his mother was a titan or when she kidnapped Historia like 3 times and put them all in danger. And I can't even be mad at Connie for being the voice of reason cause him calling her ugly was simply the truth. I, too, reared back when I first saw Ymir's titan form. 
Jean - Eren, Reiner, Annie, Bertholt
The whole Eren thing is basically squashed but it’s worth noting that if he were to see him in public, he’d walk the other way. 
I lowkey had to dig deep for this one cause I genuinely forgot. But even though they’re all kumbaya now, those three bitches literally watched his homie get half his face chewed off by a titan. Jean is absolutely pouring one out for Marco every birthday by the way, but yeahh it’s still fuck them. Like if they were playing uno stacked, he’d save all his draw 4’s and make them draw 16. 
Onyankopon - Yelena
I'm not too sure that Ony dislikes anyone honestly. But I'm going with Yelena here mostly because she’s the reason he found himself in his current predicament. On what was supposed to be a solid plan in motion to save his people quickly turned into Ony modernizing a primitive people, helping build their resources from scratch, having people question his race (and I'm willing to bet my bottom dollar it was mfs that got ignorant), seeming untrustworthy among his peers, almost getting killed, fighting in a war he had nothing to do with, and probably losing his entire family in the rumble. Now, one or two of those things were inevitable, but if you were to view things from Ony’s POV everything went to shit over a bitch with a fatal attraction to a man with daddy issues. 
Reiner - Himself
Lmaooo I LOVE a good Reiner drag. And while this started out as a joke, I'm deadass now. This man stays talking about wanting to end it all but never follows through, smh. With lots of therapy and support, I genuinely think that Reiner would be on the road to recovery and a healthy lifestyle; but there’ll always be that lingering thought on if he’s worth it or not
Honorable mention: Ymir. But solely because she would get in the way of his fantasy life with Historia. 
Armin - Floch? 
This munchkin is damn near Tanjiro levels of sweet cause omg who does he even hate??? He is always looking for the good in people and I'm about to dislocate my shoulder reaching this hard BUT, hear me out - It’s Floch even if he doesn’t outright say it. The same Floch who damaged the flying boat and almost ruined their mission before it even started? The same Floch who fucked it up so bad that Hange had to sacrifice herself which resulted in Armin taking on an even bigger responsibility? The same Floch who got in a lil too close with his bestie Eren? Close enough to be trusted with his future plans? The same Floch who when he lay on that ground bleeding Armin was nowhere in sight? Even at the port where they attacked the Yeagerists and Armin got shot in the face, he pleaded with his old comrades to stand down but Floch is beneath that level of reasoning huh? Whether Armin despises Floch or not it's safe to say if Floch were getting jumped, Armin would definitely sneak in a kick before helping. 
Floch - Erwin
This is literally one of those cases where its like I disagree but I understand lol. That man legit made them do a suicide charge and yeah he lead the charge blah blah blah but I could never be that brave. And so that resentment is understandable but in all fairness it shaped Flochs character for the better to be honest; cause that whole pwussy boi arc was annoying. 
Also adding the main cast of the Scouts lmao. They thwarted his plans and he spent his DYING breath standing on business. Gotta respect it.
Tags - @eveningatthemoviesnetwork
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NSFT Alphabet: Joseph Desaulnier
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I have no idea what im doing lol
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A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)
So ideal you prob are expecting him to run you a bath, wipe you down, cuddle all that jazz but tbh he needs a second to recover. Would cuddle if you are a cuddly type but are content lying beside you just listening to your voice. He does like to touch you after with his nail tracing your skin or kissing a spot he might have bitten too hard during the moment. I do believe this man would have after-sex snacks ready lol food and wine guy. The bath happens later 
B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)
His favorite part of his body I think would be his hair idk he seems like the time to take extra care for it. On you, I think your face if you are an expressive person or your hands. 
C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)
He likes cumming on your face. If you let him he will paint you with his cum and take a picture of it uwu
D = Dirty secret (pretty self-explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)
He likes giving those he likes pet names (‘gray little mouse’ for Aesop). He rather likes it when someone fights back rather than just accept their fate-- this goes in the bedroom too. He likes the tussle before you give in. Would let you peg him if you are into that
E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)
A lot. Trust me this man in no way is a virgin, no way and with both genders
F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)
You riding him 
G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? Are they humorous? etc.)
He is serious but might smile but he takes this very seriously
H = Hair (how well groomed are they? Does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)
Uh-hm I don't think his a hair guy based on his once skin, I doubt he has much hair down there
I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? The romantic aspect)
He can be romantic depending on the mood and 
J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)
I don't think he does this unless he is already in a relationship
K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)
Petplay, degradation, mutual masturbation, 'human furniture', titles used in the bedroom, brat taming
L = Location (favorite places to do the do)
In his bedroom he is not all that into public stuff but something you inspire him in matches (more like he bullies you for being bold)
M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)
You being a brat
N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn-offs)
He will not sub he just wont (until i find a plot reason for him to sub lol)
O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)
Too good, evil good, life-changing even 
P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)
Slow and sensual or fast and rough it all depends on the mood and place
Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)
He hates quickies at first until you tease him enough then you getting it
R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)
He can if you present it to him
S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)
The man literally can cheat using camera world to make you cum faster without having to do much work lol but also he is a swordsmen i think he can last fairly long
T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)
You need to show him what a vibrator is (but be ready to suffer)
U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)
100% unfair
V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)
Depends he can be loud or quiet (plot reasons)
W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)
Pull his hair before he cums 
X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)
Perfection 
Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)
I think he does not have a high sex drive as he got older, but if you have a high sex drive I'm sure he can match it
Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterward)
I think it depends on how long you two have been going at it. He tends to stay awake to watch you sleep, the calm after the storm feelings. Here you are vulnerable with the person who is technically your enemy in these games, peaceful and covered with his marks.
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daylighteclipsed · 1 month ago
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What's it about cloti that you like? I'm curious, bc we otherwise tend to ship the same things. I love both cloud and tifa, and they have some cute scenes, but I don't feel it with them. Idk if it's because of the truly awful shippers, or something else. For me it feels like sokai in kh 1, I see why ppl ship them and that the narrative is pushing for them to be together, but i don't really care about that aspect of their relationship. Your answer doesn't have to be elaborate or anything, it's genuinely only curiosity on my part. Other than that, how do you like rebirth so far? I know some ppl dropped it pretty fast, bc they didn't like the crazy amount of mini games. Which I get, bc some of them were a hassle, but all in all i still had fun.
Short answer: I really like their individual characters and their complicated friendship and past that Rebirth starts delving more into, and that’s made me warm up very quickly to the romance between them.
Long answer: Cloud and Tifa’s dynamic is so interesting to me in Rebirth. I feel like the game does a good job of pulling back the curtain on a relationship that up to this point has been summed up as “childhood friends” to reveal how much more complicated it is than that. Imo, these are two people who have always yearned to know each other but never really have. They were friendly when they were very young, it seems, like under the age of 7. Then, Cloud started pulling away, and Tifa has never understood why. And they haven’t been able to really reconnect since then, made all the more difficult by Sephiroth and Shinra.
FF7 pushes romantic angles with both Tifa and Aerith, which I don’t really love tbh. I do wish it was a little more toned down and optional. But I really like the sense of yearning and desire to connect that threads Cloud and Tifa’s entire relationship — and the consistent symbolism of reaching for each other, trying to bridge that physical and emotional gap between them (usually when one is about to literally or figuratively fall), that goes with it. I like watching them bond and get to know each other now, so many years later, as best as they can (considering Cloud’s memories and sense of self are all screwed up), while navigating the unique trauma of being two of the only survivors of the massacre of their village. I like their mutual support, how they take turns supporting/grounding/saving each other.
I like that memories play such a big role, that they both have precious memories of each other that are key to who they are and which no one else knows. Fucking love when Tifa falls into the Lifestream and she realizes Cloud tried to save her from crossing the metaphorical bridge of death/falling when they were kids, and you see how much the past seems to parallel the present with their roles reversed this time. I want to see the whole memory so much. I don’t know if we ever will, but man. I really feel like even if Cloud couldn’t stop Tifa from falling, he must’ve saved her from drowning. There’s a river below that bridge, right? She hit her head and presumably passed out — someone had to keep her head above water, and he was the only one there because he refused to abandon her… I think, metaphorically, that’s pretty much what’s gonna happen in the game. I don’t think Tifa is gonna be able to catch Cloud from falling, but I think she’s gonna hold his head above water when they hit the bottom.
Sorry, I’ve been thinking about this part so much shsbdbsbs I just feel like it’s so interesting and crucial to the story. I think it really helps Tifa understand what’s going on with Cloud and Sephiroth on a level the others don’t. She’s much more conscious of Cloud’s behavior and notices the distinctions between Cloud and Sephiroth. She’s usually the first to notice when something’s not right and intervene.
I like that Tifa is established as the truth to Sephiroth’s lies and the one who can kinda “wake” Cloud up because, unlike everyone else, Tifa was there when Sephiroth (and Zack and Cloud) came to town and Tifa has seen what Cloud was like before the Jenova cells/false persona (even if she’s never been able to fully understand him). She’s the only one stopping Cloud from losing complete touch with reality, which is why Sephiroth is trying to undermine her credibility and eliminate her.
Like it’s really obvious, to me, that if Cloud and Tifa could properly reconnect by finally understanding the past and each other, Sephiroth’s manipulation wouldn’t work. Like, you know in the Loveless play how the bad guy’s weakness is true love. And then the hero (Cloud) and whoever is playing the princess (I had Tifa) try to declare their love, and it doesn’t work. The bad guy just laughs and says their love is an illusion or whatever? That’s what’s going on in the game, I think. I do think they love each other, but they don’t understand each other yet, Cloud isn’t even sure who he is, his identity is scrambled eggs, so it’s not a complete or true love. They have to bridge that gap, discover the truth and really meet. You know what I mean?
I still haven’t talked about the actual romantic stuff fbdbdbsbe I’m sorry, romance is usually always secondary to me. Um. I like that Cloud initiates a lot of those intimate moments with Tifa. Other people usually invade his space and make him uncomfortable. But Tifa’s patient with him and doesn’t pressure him. He reaches out to hold her hand and hug her and stuff. He opens up to her about his doubts and fears. It’s sweet how bashful they are, how realistically awkward they are sometimes. Yeah, idk, I just think they’re neat. I want them to understand each other, finally like really know each other, and I like when they hold hands.
As for how I’m enjoying Rebirth as a game (as someone who has never played the og FF7): I’m really loving it. I think it’s so much more fun and interesting than Remake. Love the open world, the different regions, the exploration, side quests, party bonding and banter, chocobos, whatever tf is going on with those protorelics and the Queen’s Blood creator, the battle challenges, Chadley (I know he was in Remake, but I grew more attached to him in this game), the return of other old NPCs, the new ones, the fun silly stuff like the segways in Costa del Sol. Rebirth fleshes the whole world and characters out, and I’m never bored. I have very little complaints. If it sticks the landing, it might be one of my favorite video games. Rip to the mini game haters, but I’m different. (Except the piano. The piano can go fuck itself.)
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corvuscorona · 10 months ago
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"You Never Forget Your First Love."
The other day, a mutual (hi! you know who you are I think probably hello hi! thank you for the Posting Impetus!) said something that made me curious (for, like, the 80th time, actually; lol. I Have Thoughts) about something: what's the split on people who subscribe to the "Stranger of Paradise probably intended for us to believe that Jack & Sarah were in love" mindset, vs. not? In general, but ESPECIALLY around these parts.
I genuinely didn't read it that way myself (& I do NOT normally give media (general) this much credit, but the writing in this game is sublime; I had no choice but to fully engage Scholar Mode on it), + I think it's interesting that SPECIFICALLY any of my fellow tumblr people / AO3-heads / Gay People Online / etc. seem to have. (I expect nothing from people who haven't been basting themselves in the same online sub-subcultures as me for over a decade. They're allowed to write wrong things on wikis, and have done so already; it's whatever.)
I wanna metapost badly again, so let's go. Join me. No poll. If you have an opinion on this, I'm looking directly into your eyes and beckoning you towards your own keyboard + also the reblog button / comment section, like a weird ghost. What did you think when you first played the game?? What do you think right now? What are you about to think after you have read a bunch of my words. Tell Me. I Need To Know This.
Spoilers for, idk, everything? Today we will use everything we've got to talk about Princess Sarah.
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1. As a Narrative Element
This game makes a point of referring to Sarah as things like "a symbol of hope and peace" as often as possible, & when it isn't doing that she's usually in the role of An Object Or Device Of Some Kind, anyway. She's important because she's capable of holding light and dark in balance & SOMEONE'S gotta hold onto this dark crystal for safekeeping, and also we're gonna need to upset that balance on purpose later. There's that conversation in the Wicked Arbor about whether the Strangers would "choose" her (as opposed to "treasure") as the "reward" for succeeding in their mission[1], & there's the one in the Sunken Shrine where Jed asks Jack what he thinks of her and Jack says that he doesn't care about her as a person[2] BUT that protecting her is mission-critical (lol), too.
Sarah's death is metaphorically charged. It's the point of no return: the dark crystal breaks, the balance of light & dark gets extremely ruined, & Literally All The Darkness In Cornelia converges in one place (Fool's Missive XXVII). That's the payoff for the "symbol of hope and peace" motif, and communicating this idea that "the metaphorical light of hope just For Real Died, Like Catastrophically Imploded, No Take-Backs" feels to me like it was the highest priority here. Second-highest goes to "Jack had way more humanity before, but he set it aside on purpose and is actively in the middle of losing the rest of it." "Sort of." "I'm not getting into what counts as humanity or doesn't because if I did we would be here forever."
Basically, I'm saying that the tidiest read on the situation is "Jack despairs because Sarah dying means in a very literary and final way that everything is ruined forever, which doesn't necessarily have anything to do with, like, Love (romantic)." I don't think the text of the game is particularly signaling that Love (romantic) is involved, and I think that if it meant to, it would be more obvious about it. You could bundle "an romance" into the "humanity" thing if you wanted to, but I'm not inclined to, based on some additional list items that you can read below this one.
[1] The fact that Neon ALSO says she feels bad for her for being thought of in this way only reinforces my conviction that the game is pointing at Sarah & yelling "REMEMBER THAT SHE IS MOSTLY A SYMBOL!", tbh. Who wants to go point out how freaky the mechanics of Being An Royalty are w/ me and the boys??
[2] I will give the Wiki WrongPosters this: I can totally see this as some kind of irony thing, given that he's still missing like a fucktillion of his memories when he says it. However! As mentioned above, I have other reasons not to read it as evidence that he was ever, like, romantically interested in her.
2. As a Sheltered Youth™
We don't have a TON of information to work with RE: Sarah as, like, a person, but here are a couple of hard facts to start with: she's 19 (per the data book, but she'd have to be somewhere in the 18-to-early-20's age range regardless or her whole deal wouldn't really make much sense, imo. She's a baby...!), and she's royalty. I think this ties into her utility as a walking metaphor, among other things; she's archetypically young, fresh, & idealistic. I'd call her naïve but the game obviously isn't interested in portraying it as a weakness, so positive words only; why not.
You could argue that people look to her as a symbol of hope because she hasn't directly experienced enough strife to exhibit hopelessness or fear in response to bad news in the abstract. I find it interesting that before Jack, like, knocks the wind out of her & tells Sophia to take her outside so she can see for herself how bad things have gotten at the end of the game, she says that her duty is to die with her people if she has to, & it doesn't even seem to occur to her that she could lead at least some of them away to safety...? When she changes her mind, she still talks about herself as a symbol before she ever uses the word "leader". She sees HERSELF in terms of symbols and metaphors, and takes action based on her designated role As One Of Those. Not very practical.
There's also the dialogue you can have with the queen the first time you're allowed to run around in the throne room at the beginning of the game, where she asks Jack to smile in front of her daughters (NOT just Mia; daughters, plural). Even if she only means "dude can you be polite please," the fact that this is The thing she has to say to Jack is telling. Is it going to upset your 19-year-old daughter to see that the Guy Whose Job It Is To Kill Monsters looks serious? Why do you think this? Does your 19-year-old daughter understand how serious the situation is, generally speaking? Do you not WANT her to for some reason? Boats don't work anymore unless a weird elf messes with them first. Not thinking very hard about the implications of this is something a sheltered person does.
Residual time loop un-memories aside, a young woman in this situation is so obviously going to have a huge crush on Jack Garland no matter what. He Is So Cool, first of all, & he's also Different from the adult men she gets to see on an everyday basis (family, guards, rando townspeople[3]...). It's not like the political social scene could POSSIBLY be thriving in this world, either; it all seems to be one kingdom we're dealing with and they're kind of busy with the external threat of being Under Fucking Attack By Monsters. Does she even get fun treats like "handsome visiting dignitaries" & what-have-you? The game doesn't present us with any potential options, here. Jack is mysterious, he has special-boy Warrior of Light status, his one job & apparent life's purpose is protecting the kingdom she loves, he's pretty nice to her (even in later cycles he at least goes out of his way to be polite!), & additionally, he's shredded. THIS makes sense to me.
There's a Q&A in the data book that has something to say about JACK as a symbol & what that has to do with this whole thing but we'll get there. We'll get there.
[3] Tangent: what's up with how Cornelia's entire adult male population appears to consist of aging queens. Why did they only make models that look Like That for the NPCs? It's awesome but I have 1 quastion
3. JACK JUMPSCARE !
I'm not about to say that he's just humoring her, or anything, but please humor ME for one second & put yourself in Jack's shoes. Not the default shoes; we can have more fun than that. Maybe the Banded Boots. Blurple ones? Shaped like a cartoon would wear them? Big spikes on the back for no reason? I love those things. Anyway, you're Jack. You're working for literally the king, & the work means Everything to you for reasons you can't even necessarily explain except to say that it JUST does. The king's eldest daughter (very young adult; Never Been Outdoors; a little overly-sociable but nice enough & what do you expect from a princess, anyway) has imprinted on you like a duckling for whatever reason. You would be nice to this person, yes? You'd be patient with her while you're in town. You have Brutal Murders to be doing, but not until, like, 2 days from now, or whatever; you're sharing space with her in some capacity in the meantime & it's in your best interests to keep her happy. (You probably even enjoy doing this, if you're Jack of a Way Earlier Cycle; I'm in no way ruling that out. Sharing your music collection with an enthusiastic Baby Adult? That's fun. I think he was probably having fun. Okay, you can step out of the fun purple shoes if you want; the Humoring Me Minute has concluded; thanks.)
Also, @2000sanimeop and I think that if Jack felt that way about her Astos would have been a little More Something about how much it was gonna suck for him when she died. In Fool's Missive XXVII he uses the word "painful," but that's about it. He doesn't even bring it up in XXV, which is the one where he says he's curious about whether she'd survive being turned into a fiend (side note: Astos fucking rocks. Why did he write that down?? I love him). & Hey SPEAKING OF ASTOS,
4. I wouldn't put Jackstos on a wiki, either.
The writing in Stranger of Paradise, SERIOUSLY, WITHOUT EXAGGERATION, is some of the best I've seen in literally anything ever. It suits not just its medium but also its sort of Place in History Relative to Other Video Games & the things it chose to DO with that medium & that niche INSANELY well. It is CUSTOMIZED. It's SO INTENTIONAL. I can't get too far into this or we'll be here all day, but the essence of what I want to say here is: there are relatively few facts presented to us by this game, compared to the implications we can go about drawing from those facts & other, external sources of context.
Sarah calls Jack her first love; that's a fact. No facts are presented to us that REALLY say much one way or the other[4] about what Jack thinks of this, himself; "fucktillion memories missing" Jack says he doesn't care, but he's missing a fucktillion of his memories, and DLC2 Jack has a set of dialogue options (hi Anne the Malboro I love you Anne the Malboro) that can point either way depending on what the player chooses, which is kind of nothing, on balance. As the audience, we can (should!) draw whatever conclusion we want about it, but none of those conclusions are text.
[4] I WILL GET TO THE DATA BOOK IN ONE SECOND. HOLD ON.
And, okay, please let me level with you. Let's be on the same page. Jack & Astos had some kind of thing going on, imo, OBVIOUSLY, but I want to be CLEAR and I want to get CREDIT for the things I'M bringing to the table to help generate this conviction. I drew that conclusion & I read that reading based on subtext, context, personal history, personal preference, & sheer gay zest for life. It is also, emphatically, NOT TEXT.
Astos refers to Jack with the ol' "...friend" in Fool's Missive XXI. He calls him "my Jack" in Fool's Missive XXXI. Canonically, textually, he has some big fucking COMPLICATED fucking feelings about this man. These are facts. If you're playing this game as Some Guy, I can see how you could potentially absorb these facts & still pay them much less regard[5] than I did & continue to. My argument here is that god I wish I lived in a world where Some Guy could extend the same courtesy to me and not treat Sarah's textual affection for Jack as something that necessarily indicates Some Kind Of Reciprocal Romantic Whatever, Definitely, Obviously, Of Course.
[5] Longer Tangent: I have been informed that the Some Guys of the world are currently pretty good at Recognizing a character that behaves in a way that's Pretty Gay, but tend to stop there, possibly for the combined reasons that A. they're not very familiar with a lot of the the ways gay relationships often work (you know, soul resonance. mutual recognition. sharing a brain etc.) and B. the Object Of Affection is usually the player character and they subconsciously shy away from thinking of a Guy They're Supposed To Identify With as gay. This is practically a lead-in to an entire separate post I could make, so I'll leave it at that, lol.
The writing is too good for that kind of assumption! I'M SERIOUS!! It's mind-blowingly subtle & endlessly fascinating to hold up to the light & view from every possible angle, and "Jack & Sarah were in love" + "Jack & Astos were in love" are BOTH ANGLES. I'm personally very very interested in giving the text credit for that. I think it's impressive. I think it's really, really cool, and I think it was on purpose. Speaking of which,
5. Word of God agrees with me, btw
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This is from the Q&A section on page 156 of the Confidential File. The translations below are my own (I think they're straightforward enough, but lmk if you know more than me & I'm actually being stupid in there somewhere. Alt text has the JPN, if you want to copypaste it or something). Someone asked:
Why is it that you established Garland as someone Sarah has a romantic interest in?
The answer is from Daisuke Inoue (director, one of 3; the other 2 are from Team Ninja; he's from Square Enix):
That was because, from a narrative standpoint, we wanted Sarah to be the kind of person who holds onto hope. You can imagine that she saw the "hope" to save the world in Jack, a potential Warrior of Light. Sarah is seen by her people as a symbol of a bright future, but if there were nobody to give her hope, that might destabilize her emotionally. As for whether she felt genuine love for Jack, or just mistook her feelings of admiration towards him for "first love," we'll leave that to your interpretation.
The first time I read this, I thought the question was implying the aforementioned Reciprocal Something, but on closer inspection that doesn't even seem to be true! "思い人" seems to indicate a directional relationship; as in, the question assumes that Jack is an object of affection to Sarah, but assumes nothing about what Jack thinks.
Also, the answer uses the word "初恋" (hatsukoi), which is a very established Concept as far as "first love" goes, but in that one cutscene, Sarah says "初めての恋" (hajimete no koi), which is. Different, but I couldn't tell you how, lol. It's Not The Exact Same Phrase, but I'm not sure whether it's meaningfully different in this context. If I had to guess, I'd say that IF ANYTHING it could be a way of saying "first love" without invoking the cultural CONSTRUCT of First Love (as much)? But it's whatever. The localization holds up. All sources show that Sarah had Feelings about Jack, and all sources CONSPICUOUSLY neglect to mention Jack's feelings about her.
It was on purpose. This is my license to be as annoying as I want for one second here. I am right. All the other writing in this game is notably subtle, efficient, intentional, and skilled, AND ALSO, WHEN do you ever see anyone write such a richly beautiful, mostly-subtextual relationship between two men, which can easily be read as a romantic thing, and NOT explicitly canonize a very possible romantic relationship between at least one of those men and a woman, like not even in an interview or anything. What the fuck, man.
I'm putting away the Respectable Scholar Hat now. This is so funny. The person asking this question didn't EVEN go as far as assuming Jack & Sarah had any kind of Actual Romance going on, & the answer STILL dials it back to "she might have been conflating her feelings about Jack AS A SYMBOL with actual affection, also. We'll let you decide : ) ". This game is everything ever.
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woah-uhuh-uhuh-uhuh · 1 year ago
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Christine Canigula was socially ostracized & developed a complex to protect herself: an essay
(suddenly i NEED to infodump about Christine actually so here)
Something I only noticed on rewatch: the way Christine will say something silly and then just kind of gingerly wait to see if Jeremy reacts well to it before continuing, almost like she's asking permission?? (e.g. the gap after the first stanza of "Play Rehearsal"). And it's only after he riffs off her bowling alley bit that she feels comfortable talking about her personal feelings with him (right before "Guy that I'd Kinda be Into"). The same happens with their "weird noise" exchange immediately before "It's pretty killer to sit and chat with you." I know theater relies on being succinct, and that 'bonding over shared quirks' and 'feelings talk' are both just crucial parts of relationship development... but I don't think it's a coincidence that it always goes in that order!
It's like Jeremy has to pass these *trials of weirdness* before she feels safe opening up to him and it drives me BONKERS so I wrote a whole 1000 word thing about it under the cut and this got too massive and I'm sorry. Also some autistic Jeremy meta at the end if that sweetens the pot hehehe
Table of contents:
Why she was ostracized
How she was ostracized
How that might inform her pattern of relationship development with Jeremy and Jake
How gender caused Jeremy's experiences to differ from hers, and how that affects their current relationships with "popularity" and peer acceptance.
1. Why she was ostracized
I am just so certain that Christine has been bullied or at least majorly outcast for a lot of her life. She's very obviously neurodivergent and because of that she can have these obnoxiously deep and repetitive interests, she can't judge if a piece of information will be genuinely interesting to someone, and she doesn't take social cues very well.
She frequently interrupts people when they're talking (an ADHD symptom btw), even when they're literally talking to her about the thing she wants to hear!
(C: "Do you find that? Because I totally find that!" J: "Uh, yeah, I-" C: "-And no matter how hard I try....")
(J: "I know the last thing I deserve is another shot, but-" C:"Jeremy, just... say what's on your mind.") (girl I'm sorry but that's what he was doing..... I have a whole other thoughtpiece on how this particularly fucks with Jeremy while they're dating but thats another thing...)
She doesn't seem confident in her interpretations of people's emotions and she'll ask/talk about them point blank (both theirs and her own) in a way a lot of people would find rude
("Uh, you seem really nervous...") ("Popular people are fucked up! *mutual laughter* …I mean, you're one of them!") ("I am flattered, this is new / still I'm not sure what I should do" <- as a response to getting asked out, that's pretty bold! Plus the entire part where she laughs at Jake's "rich boy routine") (also compare and contrast to Jeremy's "I don't know what I'm supposed to say right now." idk. are your allistic stage dorks in the room with us right now motherfuckers)
I'd go on about her hyperfixations/special interests too but I think Play Rehearsal pretty much sums it up lol
2. How she was ostracized
All this to say that I am CERTAIN she spent a lot of her schooling having "nice girls" patiently let her sit with them at lunch for weeks at a time until they finally get sick of her rambling and faux pas. Only when they leave does Christine realize that they didn't actually care about anything she said... And this happens over and over and over. (I know this seems hella specific but I swear it's an actual phenomenon... at least I'm pretty sure? sdjflksjf)
But anyway, it's clear that by the time they're juniors, Christine has kind of (and I do only mean kind of) figured out what behaviour other people respond poorly to. And from evidence I stated in the intro, I think she's become really careful about which people she lets herself get attached to. She doesn't want this to ever happen again - which means if she's going to hang out with someone, she has to know that they actually care about her, that they know she will sometimes be obnoxious or blunt, and they'll still be okay with that forever.
3. Applying this to her canon relationships
You can extend this to Jake, someone who sees her in her element in drama rehearsal (the thing everyone finds annoying about her because she won't shut up about it) and STILL likes her. I think it's a totally valid reading that her bluntness with him later ("Upgrade") is just because she misreads him / doesn't quite get the social standard that she should be white lying instead. But I think you could also read her as testing the waters. If she's really going to commit to dating this guy, she's gotta know he's okay with her being herself. And the fact that this guy (and I think it's significant that he is a boy, for reasons I'll explain in the end note) genuinely seems to like her is a whole new level of peer validation ("I am flattered, this is new") -- so of course she's gonna fall at least a little! It doesn't hurt that he's "tired of being the person that everyone thinks that I am..." just like her!
Her history with being pity-liked makes Chloe's "advice," that Jake's just toying with her and is going to move on soon, even scarier, because that's genuinely happened to her (on a platonic level) so many times before.
Jeremy is also a good candidate from the beginning because he's weird he's a weirdo he doesn't fit in and he doesn't wanna fit in you ever see him without this stupid cardigan on? that's weird! And she keeps warming up to him not only because they're getting to know each other but because he gets progressively more willing to not only tolerate (as Jake does) but *participate* in her weirdness!
First, she does something weird and he tolerates it ("Play Rehearsal"); the next time she's weird, he participates! (bowling ball before GTIKBI). Then finally finally finally he initiates the weirdness and lets her join in! ("weird noises" exchange before GTIKBI reprise).
And notably, it is THIS moment that canonically signifies that they've hit the apex of their canon relationship development. If there was an achievement called "Befriend Christine," it would have popped up right then and there!!!
IN CONCLUSION: YOUR HONOR I LOVE THEM T_T
4: Christine vs. Jeremy: Gender differences & how that ultimately impacts their social goals
I also think all of this would have happened to Jeremy too if he'd been a girl. But because, generally, young boys feel less social obligation than girls to take pity on the autistic kid (and because boys tend to be more quickly recognized as autistic) he just ends up completely alone for most of his school life (Michael nonwithstanding - and yeah there's an important distinction between your childhood friend putting up with you and knowing that, woah, I guess literally nobody else ever will).
Meanwhile, Christine has had people "put up" with her, and she's SICK OF IT!
That's part of why their complexes are so different, because Christine is trying to check everyone she meets to make sure they'll be okay with her weirdness before she gets attached, Jeremy is trying to eliminate his weirdness altogether because he's never even experienced his peers listening out of *pity* so how the hell can he expect someone to ever listen to him out of *interest?*
Jeremy has never had someone pretend to like him before, so he completely lacks Christine's fear of befriending someone who secretly hates you. He doesn't realize how bad it'll hurt him if he destroys his real self for popularity, if he befriends people who would have bullied his real self. He doesn't know what disingenuous friendship feels like, so like a very young Christine he's still actively trying to get there because he thinks it's the only kind of validation he'll ever get.
Do you see what im saying? Do you see it???? AUAUGUGUUGGH
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THANK YOU FOR READING!!! If you have thoughts or even rebuttals please share i am so desperate to discuss the blorbos
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gyougherea · 5 months ago
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crp/mh pride hcs
got inspired by a mutual (the-s1lly-corner) <3 i wanna have a silly post about my silly guys. under cut bc i might get long
jeff the killer
jeff feels very greyrom/aro bisexual to me, i think he "prefers" women because he doesn't wanna admit he's bisexual at first. idk if he explicitly uses the greyrom label or anything but it describes him pretty well. he/him
liu woods / homicidal liu
can we give it up for TRANSHETS!!!!!!! realized he was trans (ftm) at a young age, didn't get to transition until adulthood because the only family who supported him was jeff. mainly to hide from his past he's also stealth about being transgender. he/him
sully (liu's cohost and protector) is arohet i think? idk haven't thought much but i do think liu and sully have slightly different seuxalities. it/he (EDIT: its sexuality is also influenced by the fact that it's an introject of jeff)
jane the killer
lesbian and also trans mtf!!! transbian jane epic win. i think she knew for a while that she was a lesbian and then also realized she was trans in high school as she was going further through puberty. i think she's femme lesbian specifically??? she/her
nina the killer
bisexual (initially had a pref for women, now just has a pref for the glasgow killer, aka jeff), cis girl but LOOOOOVES experimenting with pronouns!!! she/her default but PLEASE use neopronouns on her she would literally die for you if you got wacky with it
ben drowned
even if he wasn't ethereally both 12 and 32 he would still 100% be aroace. that shit does not intrigue him! he also uses he/they pronouns, maybe it/its. lost their gender in the whole becoming a computer shit
ticci toby
transmasc nonbinary, biromantic asexual! he/him pronouns specifically, despite not being a man he really leans into masculine terms and also even is on T and gave himself top surgery! yes. to himself. don't ask. it looks awful. world's worst top surgery scars award
clockwork
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she/her. not butch not femme but a secret third thing (the butchest lesbian twitter can handle before getting scared /ref)
tim wright (two hcs)
normal hc is that he's biromantic aceflux! he doesn't really have a preference, frankly he's nervous about entering a serious relationship regardless of gender. his asexuality is kind of a roulette; he also probably falls between sex-neutral and sex-repulsed. he/him
"my house now" hc is that he's an intersex butch lesbian (not sure which exact intersex disorder but one of the ones i'm debating is something with 46,xx dsd?) that doesn't care about gender but uses he/him and masc terms because someone called him that and he was like "why not lol". he/him but frankly not offended if any other pronouns used
masky uses he/they in the first hc, it/its in the second hc
brian thomas (two hcs)
normal hc is that he's a gay man! discovered he was gay pretty early on in life and was probably tim's unofficial bisexual awakening back in college. very open about his identity, he's like the queer beacon in my eyes. he/him
"my house now" hc is that he's a lesbian and trans mtf! for the longest time she thought she was a bisexual man, but then in her late 20s to early 30s realized that not only did she feel like One Of The Girls(TM) but also that the only "man" she was attracted to was tim, who's not a man, so whoops! transbian time! she/her
hoodie uses he/it in the first hc, it/they in the second hc
jay merrick
trans ftm and bisexual! went on T but hasn't gotten top or bottom surgery before becoming the nefarious skully or whatever. cracked his egg in college, but probably figured out he was biseuxal in high school. he/him
skully uses no labels just vibes. queer/abrosexual and genderfluid are probably the labels that best describe them but again they don't fucking care. they/them default but sometimes uses others depending on which of their "many" are at the forefront
jessica locke
now if that's not the biggest lesbian i have ever seen in my life... her and taylor absolutely get married in lesbians after the comics are over. jessica probably always knew she didn't like boys but didn't realize she liked girls until a fateful sleepover in middle school or something. she/her
nothing specific for the others rn, might make a part 2 if i come up with more <3 adios
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lightsoutletsgo · 8 months ago
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Hey Mimi! I've noticed lots of people doing the "which mutual is which driver" tag and so I wondered what your choices would be? If this isn't your kind of post don't worry about it! xx
oooo this is so fun! tysm for sending this in, I love this kind of stuff! I only have a few mutuals that I talk to because I'm super shy about starting new conversations! (so if we are moots, pls dm me! I'd love to talk to you) ₊˚❀.ೃ࿔*:・ okay so this is all my personal opinion guys pls don't be offended 🥹 ily: LANDO NORRIS — @jamminvroomvroom; jas is 100% lando 🥹 the chaotic energy is just too similar for me to pick anyone else. always up for a laugh but knows how to be serious when needed. says the most silly goose things but it's just too fucking funny and iconic. also the loml 🤭
CHARLES LECLERC — @thebearchives bear! my baby 🥰 idk why but I like... have to give you charles? it just fits. I think bc you're both silly and goofy but hard working and dedicated. plus you both sometimes say things and then realise you made an oopsie and it makes me giggle! (also ur the charles to my carlos soooo)
OSCAR PIASTRI — @norrizzandpia; the dry sense of humour and the way you both say things so deadpan is literally the same 😭 funny asf but also sweet asf. just two small beans I want to put in my pocket and protect forever
ALEX ALBON — @scuderiahoney; lee! I honestly could not pick anyone else for lee. both of them give me warm hug vibes. alex is v much someone that's super supportive and caring and lee is the same! also scrolling through lee's blog makes me think that they're both quite memeable 🤭
MAX VERSTAPPEN — @verstappen-cult; so I haven't really spoken to you yet (I may or may not have freaked when I saw you'd followed me sksksks) but just from scrolling through your blog you give me max vibes - not just because of the user! again I can't explain it, I just get the same feeling from you that I get from max (it's a nice one don't worry!)
PIERRE GASLY — @jackhues; naqia! we haven't talked in dm's but I love scrolling through your blog and catching up on what I've missed! you give me big pierre vibes. just the way you seem so cool and your blog is super aesthetic and chilled!
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luxesiren · 2 years ago
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HELLO! You're literally one of the best writers that I've found here on tumblr, you write Eren so good😭, Idk if you're accepting any requests ATM if you're not, just ignore this🙇🏻‍♀️ BUT I HAVE THIS UH THOUGHT, college student Eren x reader likeeeeee Eren is chasing after reader, (Zeke's best friend, they're both also in college) that's all, iloveoyyou
hi!! omg thank you! i think there are better writer’s out here but thank you so much! i am accepting requests, i just haven’t gotten any but i can do this for you! hope you enjoy!
warnings; black reader, thick/chubby reader, uses she/her pronouns, third person POV, mutual pining, heavy kissing, and fluff.
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eren had been obsessed with his brother's best friend for as long as he could remember and at first, he thought it was just a crush that would just go away but as time went on and his crush didn't lessen - he just let it build up.
she didn't know that he had a crush on her but he couldn't but stumble over his words whenever he was around her or try to act cool because he wanted to impress her.
"zeke, please. at least introduce me to her." eren pleaded with his older brother for the umpteenth time this week and zeke was growing tired of his begging, "i will leave you alone after this, i promise."
"eren, please. you said that last time and plus, how do you know that she even wants to get to know you." zeke said, rolling his eyes at his younger brother's antics.
see, zeke didn't know if he really wanted to introduce his best friend to his brother. his best friend (in his opinion) was out of eren's league. he could remember the first time they met and eren was a nervous wreck, at the time, it was hilarious but looking back at it, eren was really infatuated with her. "okay, i'll let you meet her and get to know her but don't fuck this up. she's a nice girl and deserves to treated as such." he advised his brother.
eren cheered internally.
~~~~
a few weeks went by and eren found himself in front his brother's best friend and stumbling over his words again. "shit. i'm sorry, that was bad. i'm eren."
her laugh was light and airy, "eren, i know who you are. you're zeke's little brother."
"wait, you know me?" he asked with a smirk, confidence coming in and making her blush and he liked how it looked on her cheeks. he observed her appearance, her natural hair out and curly - she had her hair in a high puff and eren loved it. her shirt baggy and her tan cargos hugged her thighs beautifully, eren couldn't have been more obsessed with her.
"yeah of course i do." she replied with a beaming smile, eren snapped out of his thoughts and smirked. "how could i not remember someone who's been chasing after me?"
"i- uh i dont know, what-" he stuttered.
and there was that laugh again, "no, it's cute." she said with a soft smile and looked at her watch, "i've gotta get to my next class but here." she scribbled her phone number down on a small piece of paper and handed it to him with a wink.
he was joyous.
~~~~
eren's crush on her had only grown more within the few weeks they got to know each other more. he walked her to class every day and spent his free period with her, taking her to get coffee and to study more for their tests.
she'd grown to like eren more too, albeit, she had a major crush on him too. she enjoyed their time together and she cared for her best friend's little brother in ways that she couldn't really explain. he took her on various dates, sometimes they were lowkey and others were more extravagant but she enjoyed all of them regardless, but the ones she enjoyed the most were the ones where they relaxed and watched tv shows together.
like the one they were on right now, although the show they were watching was background noise seeing as her hands were trailing up eren's chest underneath his shirt, their lips locked, and eren on top of her.
their tongues tangled together and he swallowed all of her small moans, eren's hands wrapped around her waist and pulling her closer to his chest. "baby, you wanna be my girlfriend?" he said as he pulled away from her lips, her gloss smeared on his lips.
"you didn't even have to ask. of course, i will, ren!" she answered excitedly, her arms wrapping around his shoulders and pulling him back into a kiss just in time for zeke to walk into eren's room.
"seriously? i did not need to see you locking lips with my little brother." his disgust evident.
"who walked in without knocking?" she asked before eren could say something, he looked at zeke with a smug grin and his eyebrow raised.
zeke nodded and walked out the room, closing the door behind him.
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i hope this was what you expected😭! thank you for sending the request, i appreciate you!!
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writteninlunarlight-years · 6 months ago
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Heya! I sent in a matchup request before but I kinda rambled off in it (and I think I was on anon too-) so imma try again and be less ramble-y 😅
For Hazbin Hotel please!
-------------
Gender/Pronouns: She/They AFAB
Sexuality: Asexual, questioning-aromantic who would date men/masc
Age: 25
Appearance: 5'11 White Australian with pale as fuck skin, blue eyes with dark bags under them, half my head is shaved the other half long, currently dyed red hair but it changes once it washes out and I get bored of my natural blonde. Slightly chubby belly with average breasts I wanna remove completely 👍
MBTI: INFP-T
Mental Additives: I have autism, clinical depression, clinical anxiety, PTSD and lowkey a hypochondriac.
Personality: I'm told I'm open-minded and easy to get along with. I am also a completely open book who talks about 98% of things I have been through; including trauma and random factoids I have learnt.
I smile all the time, even when crying I find myself smiling sometimes. All I want is for the people I care about to be happy; and I don't always include myself in that list but I've been getting better at doing so!
I don't have a job but I am slowly looking. I think I've just gotten used to not having a job or going to school? It's boring and mind numbing, but the last job I had gave me anxiety attacks. Doesn't help I have no ambitions in life. Except for whatever hyperfixation I'm on!
Yet I also verbally yet playfully threaten violence on friends, but if need be I can't ever throw a punch. I diffuse situations with words and pacifist action (like leaving). But I will use my height and build to be threatening to protect a friend, despite knowing that I can't defend myself. I also break into tears if I feel like I said the wrong thing to a friend or family member. I'm not as scary as I sometimes look or act.
Imma list off words that remind me of my personality since idk how else to explain myself: Helpful, imaginative, leisurely, loyal, protective, self-critical, absentminded, touch-starved, irritable (prob the anxiety talking hopefully), unable to flirt or recognise flirting, quirky, anxioussss!, logical thinker.
Likes: True crime, reading/writing fanfic, my cat, my five birds, my two fish!, I want reptile pets, random facts, the cold (jumper weather), playing all types of video games, watching YouTube, thunderstorms, chocolate, soft drinks, my lil brother, my OC that I shape into whatever fixation I'm on!
Dislikes: Having writers block, drinking alcohol, smelling cigarettes/weed, being called lazy, being compared to others, the heat (remove my skin), drinking water, my lil brother (when he's in mean mode), racists, terfs, literally all dumbasses who think they're better than everyone, routines.
Hi, I love you! I hope you enjoy this! I want everyone to know that this bean is an amazing Mutual, and you should all check them out! Okay, okay, now to the show!
~~~~~ MATCHUPS ~~~~~
HAZBIN HOTEL
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Alastor
~~~~~ HEADCANONS ~~~~~
Alastor really doesn't care for people in general. If you aren't one of the few he deems good enough, stay out of his way.
That's why he was thrown for a loop when you came along. Is someone so kind and genuine not being scared of him? Who do you think you are?
Alastor is very protective, and though it may take ages to realize he has feelings, he will firmly defend and protect you.
When you and Niffty are hanging out, he feels so proud and almost giddy, an emotion he only feels when murdering normally.
When you fought the Angels, he was in awe of you. Though you needed training from Vaggie, you were fierce and ready to do whatever you could to save your friends.
The first time he snapped at you, he felt horrible, and when you started crying, he was practically a dead man, times two. He spent weeks trying to apologize and make it up to you.
He isn't big on touching or affection, but he shows you he cares in his own way. He is always opening the door for you, cooking for you, and taking you to special events or places.
He supports all your hobbies and interests and even tries to help you find new things to enjoy. This way, when he is busy doing whatever he has to, you are entertained until he returns.
He loves just having lazy days with you in the Radio Tower. There, he can work on his master plans, and you can do whatever to your heart's content.
When he finally accepts he has stronger feelings for you than his regular crew of Mimzy, Rosie, and Niffty, he asks the girls what's happening to him.
They collectively help him confess to you, and when they find out that you two are a lot more similar than they thought, they are thrilled for you two now that you guys have found your person.
If you ever mention physical touch or intimacy with him, he will allow it, but only if you are comfortable with it. Do not force yourself to think it's the right thing to do unless you 100% want it to.
~~~~~ BLURB ~~~~~
You had been working with Niffty on a surprise for Alastor. He had been working hard to take down the Vees and especially hard to piss off Vox after a particularly vile comment he made about you. Niffty was out collecting the materials while you were researching how to make a cape, crown, and scepter. Once everything was rounded up and ready to go, you two got down to some serious work. Building your masterpiece for Alastor was moving along well, and you two couldn't wait to see his face.
Sneaking up to Alastors room, you set up the creation. While you were busy making it look perfect, Niffty distracted Alastor. However, Alastor knew that something was off as soon as you weren't downstairs ready to greet him. Making his way to your location, Niffty did her best to stall the tall man, but it was too late. Luckily, just before the door opened, you had set up the display. You remembered before the battle against the Angels that Niffty had dubbed Alastor 'King Roach'. Alastor was a king in your eyes, so you wanted to show him how you honestly thought of him.
There before Alastor stood a mannequin with a deep red cape adorned with blackthorns, a crown made of black cardboard and gold glitter glue, and lastly, a scepter made out of a large stick and one of Lucifer's rubber ducks that looked like Alastor. The man couldn't help but laugh at the creation in pure enjoyment. As he walked over to start putting on the new outfit, Niffty crawled up your shoulder and perched there waiting. Once King Alastor was officially crowned, he bent down and asked, "May I kiss you, my love?" You nodded gently, and all that was heard after the kiss was a 'blegh' sound from the tiny woman perched on your head.
~~~~~ EXTRA ~~~~~
(You had been sitting in the Radio Tower for hours and were ready for fun. However, Alastor was still trying to work.)
Y/N: Can we please do something else, Alastor?
Alastor: Dear, you are always more than welcome to do whatever you please. The most powerful demon lord is your partner.
Y/N: Noooo, Alastor, I wanna do something with you.
Alastor: Hmmmm, is that so, like what?
Y/N: uh uh uh....damn it! You can't put me on the spot like that, Alasor.
Alastor: Alright, alright, come on, let's go to Rosies for some tea and a break.
Y/N: Hell yeah! Field trip!
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trillscienceofficer · 2 years ago
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Imagine if Voyager truly cared about what B'Elanna and Seven wanted, like. once in seven years? For all the screentime Seven gets, it's never about what she wants, just what she has to do in order to fit in better, and B'Elanna... well. She truly gets shit from everyone for no reason whatsoever.
One of the main reasons why I would've love for them to interact more is that, for all their mutual annoyance, somehow they aren't as dismissive with each other as others are with them. Seven is a an arrogant little shit but she apologizes to B'Elanna very frequently when B'Elanna expresses her annoyance, more than most other characters generally do with B'Elanna honestly! And Seven seems to notice pretty quickly when B'Elanna is upset too, which always makes me raise my eyebrows because we're constantly told Seven is not very socially smart... she is though, once she starts learning. B'Elanna in turn only tells Seven to cut it out when she crosses a line and is not at all about giving her a lesson in 'humanity' or whatever.
@nebulouscoffee left some tags that made me think last night:
#on rewatch especially!! I noticed how much the script kept telling me these two hated each other #but they so rarely ever really came off that way? #and even when they did it always felt so... idk Scripted
And I totally agree with this. Voyager to me is a fundamentally unselfaware show, especially when it comes to B'Elanna: we're told things about her by other characters, but those never, ever gel very well with how she acts, how she expresses her feelings, how justified she she is in being irritated when others treat her like anything she says or does is unreasonable. On a lesser degree Seven is also treated that way; constantly, constantly told 'this is how you need to act', 'this is what you need to learn', 'this what it means to be human' and punished every time she's not good at it which is inevitable because literally no one else (except B'Elanna! or maybe Harry, although he is exempt from sexist tropes) is held to the same impossible standards. And Seven tries very hard every time! But of course the show is convinced that she needs to be taken down a peg in order to become 'a real woman' (yikes).
The way the show wants to present B'Elanna and Seven together is always 'look how catty they are with each other (wink wink)', and imho it isn't different from what's going on with them taken singularly. We're told they don't like each other, but what is shown to me is... way more nuanced, especially taking into consideration how they both fit (and not fit) within the ship. In a way, the way they relate to one another is the most honest rapport either of them have on Voyager. They don't really want anything from one another, they aren't thinking about fundamentally changing the other so their lives can be easier (again, when B'Elanna gets annoyed with Seven she only reiterates her own boundaries). Granted the show makes awful jokes at their expense sometimes (“Infinite Regress” and the cold open of “Someone to Watch Over Me” come to mind) but show me a character or a relationship on Voyager who is exempt from this kind of deeply uncomfortable and not actually very funny situation.
I truly believe that exploring this relationship more could have given them some much needed space. Space is a concept I always come back to when I think of B'Elanna and Seven, because I think both of them (especially B'Elanna) needed more of it to be themselves on their own terms for once. And I'm not talking necessarily about minutes of screentime—I'm talking about the writing being less sexist and racist, being less enamored with the idea of conformity, caring about them as characters and not as props in the absurd sexist, idiosyncratic fantasies of a 90s production: even beside Seven's horrible biosuit, B'Elanna is so often 'the girlfriend who doesn't understand what the protagonist is going through and will be insulted onscreen', it makes me genuinely mad!
Obviously I'm not exactly wishing Voyager had actually done it, because again, totally unselfaware writing all the time, but thinking about B'Elanna and Seven interacting always leads me to think about how they could both let each other simply be, even if they would still likely annoy the shit out of each other. And I wouldn't ever want to change that, honestly: willful women deserve to be themselves, that's all.
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