#like i wasnt expecting that to be true
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i was imagining a scenario and then as a joke decided to look up if it was true or not
and yall
michael yew is not tall enough to ride in the front seat
istg i was thinking about travis making a joke about this and then
i cant
michael would do it anyway though
i love him so much
#michael yew#pjo#phoenix rambles#like i wasnt expecting that to be true#i dont know know shit about driving shit in america#even here he wouldnt be allowed#gotta be 4'9 /and/ over eight years old#hes got one of those things#i love him yall
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I can't stop thinking about the Watcher thing it's just so fascinatingly bizarre . like so many components of that decision and how they handled it were so bad and so completely out of left field for how they've operated in the past I am baffled . Someone put these guys under a microscope Stat
#watcher#like ?? it all boils down to money i know but wow#like i dont think Anyone would've cared that they introduced a subscription service if they hadnt announced it in the worst most victim#complex way possible + made SUCH a stark leap from completely paid to completely behind a paywall ?? i do not know how they expected that t#go over well#i guess i am just most baffled by the way it seems to suggest that they are just so out of touch when previously#they seemed overall very humble and down to earth#i do not think theyre just like evil money hungry freaks or something#like definitely its also that they also just want to keep improving and making better stuff and that takes more money but also .#like ....... their content Has gone a little downhill despite it all . i think most people have been thinking that and just holding out hop#that it wasnt true.#idk im gonna stop talking its not important#i dont even know why im so invested in this actually . its just . so bizarre as previously stated#trainwreck etc.#i am glad they frantically took everything back dear god#funny to watch a little i must admit#mine
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ok sitting down for a moment at disneyland. elaborating on the post-beat concert shenanigans in the tags
#for those of you invested in my silly misadventures#ok so .#there was the meet n greet earlier which as i said was short but very nice and i was squimshed against ade for the photo#AFTER THE SHOW . go around the concert venue to the area by the stage door#but unlike the beacon theatre we were a long ways away from the stage door it was the huge parking lot and we were fenced off#and based off of the spars concert from last year at the beacon where the guys just left after we waited for almost an hour#i didnt really expect the beat guys would come over or anything but i was willing to wait a while#and wait a while we did and then danny carey came out and eventually came over to us and was really sweet and signed stuff#he wasnt taking any photos but was very nice just like the epitome of fun drummer guy#waited a while more. doubting still that the other guys would come over#next was adrian! and being the absolute sweetie he is he did come over and everything abt him is true#hes just the most wondrous sweet guy ever. he was also radiating comforting dad energy bc that annoying prog fan was there again#and ade was kind of like nicely protective where i was w my friend#ade also liked my inner revolution shirt and remembered me from the meet n greet :)#waited a while more and then eventually steve vai came out and well im sorry what can i say . i was 😵💫#it didnt help that when he signed my poster (as the other guys had before him) that like. his hand was resting on my hand god anyway#im sorry. old men musicians are my number one weakness as anyone whos been following me knows#oh i had gotten a blurry photo w ade and then got a flash photo w steve. its horrifying <3#we waited like an hour more for tony who was on a long ass phone call#but very nicely he came over too and somehow the photo w him turned out nicest. hes such a sweet polite guy#he also sounds like ron mael kinda lol#and thats my adventure!#and now ive spent an obscene amount to see em again. god
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make your mean spirited jokes about men all you want but byeeeeeeeeee
#dont expect me to want to stick around and be ok w hearing it. im tired. idc anymore.#im over here trying to feel euphoria about myself and everyone else is trying to make me feel like shit about wanting to be a guy#so for my own mental health im peacing out.#i think ppl really underestimate the negative impact hearing 'men are trash' repeated over and over and over again has on trans guys#when a message is repeated enough to you you start to believe its true or at least pretend to to not upset the people around you even tho#it hurts so fucking badly to hear- that the kind of person you are is just irredeemable trash.#thanks. bye. fuck off and out of here.#like this was the website that was all 'we dont need men anymore genocide men' like i remember reading that shit ok. im tired. im over it.#im worn with enough experience with this kind of shit that i dont want to be around it anymore.#and no the 'genocide men' shit wasnt a joke. it was a serious consideration on a post about the possibility of conceiving children#through bone marrow.#I Dont actually have to hangout w you if i constantly feel like you're shitting on me
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god i fucking hate my dad
#he came home today from a bike trip he went on and he's been arguing with me about honeybee the whole fucking day#he keeps saying just let her out let her run around! every time i put her in her pen to nap#and he refuses to stop her from biting him#and he got mad at her for playing with his socks when she'd just been playing with mine and he threw them on the floor of the living room#which first of all stop being such a fucking slob#and second of all what the fuck did you expect to happen? it's a soft new toy on the floor where she spends most of her time. where all her#toys are. very similar to the two soft items she's allowed to play with (my socks)#she's fucking 3 months old she doesn't understand the difference between my socks and his socks#and i keep telling him i know what im doing i was doing all the research while he went to buttfuck nowhere on his midlife crisis motorcycle#but he just wont fucking listen to me#and hes like oh youre at that age where you think youre right about everything and are so stubborn like fuck you actually#first of all im stubborn about this because its a living breathing puppy and his actions will affect her behaviour as an adult#and bc i know what im fucking doing. ive been an animal person my entire life. i did all the research. i did this exact same thing with#parrots for five years.#and hes like you cant just put her in her pen every time shes being a dog like no i fucking dont. i only put her in her pen when it's time#for a nap and she's getting overtired. you can't just let her run around until she collapses bc for one she never fucking will#second that's only going to make her energy threshold higher and then she'll be absolutely impossible to handle#and i told him that and that i read that on like every professional dog training source i read#and he said that might be true or might not be#like it fucking is bitch omfg#and then he tried to one up me like um i actually raised you guys for a long time i know what im doing#like a child is not a fucking dog. also my mom raised us lets be fucking serious. and look how well adjusted i turned out#and he told me to relax and calm down like i wasnt even arguing with him but i sure as hell will now#like dont tell me to fucking relax. when has telling anyone to relax ever made anything better. especially a teenager. especially a (for#simplicity's sake) woman.#and i told him dont tell me to relax and he got all pissy and stormed off#like literally fuck you#im my fathers daughter. im just as stubborn as he is.#rambles
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WHAT DO YOU MEAN GARTH IS IN THE SEXYPEDIA WIKI !?!??!?!?!?
I WAS NOT EXPECTING TO SEE THIS TODAY
WHY IS HIM THERE BUT NOT OLAN IVE SEEN SO MUCH THIRSTY ART OF OLAN TOO GHGHHJDHJDFHJDFHJG
#ive been laughing super weirdly for 10 minutes im dead#PALE TWINK AJSAHAFSA#UNKEMPT BEING A SEXYMAN TRAIT AGSAHAAHAGAFDF well its true#lisa rpg#garth lisa rpg#PUT QUEEN ROGER IN THE WIKI TOO WHATS WRONG WITH YOUUU#i feel like im having a fever dream#I LITERALLY LOOKED FOR HIM IN THE WIKI LAST YEAR AND HE WASNT THERE#AND RIGHT AFTER THAT HE GOT ADDED#i feel like brad and terry should be there too to an extent#MF BUZZO AND RANDO SHOULD BE IN IT BUT I ONLY FOUND HIM NO WAYY#i was just translating an img with google lens and it took me here i was not expecting this at all
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idk, its just. like. a person comes up to you with their heart cradled in their hands. says it is broken, says it hurts. places it in your hands, asks you to please make it stop and trusts you to fix it. wouldnt you be scared, too? wouldn't you be haunted by visions of you tripping and shattering it beyond repair, of driving the thing thats hurting them even further down so that maybe no one can ever get it out, of someone in their deepest darkest moment trusting you with their life and you fucking it up? how could that ever feel like anything but defusing a bomb? trust is such a valuable thing, a powerful thing, a delicate thing, and the more you have the more you get given and the more careful you have to be with it because what if someday you drop it and break it and it turns out you never should have been given it in the first place. wouldnt you be scared?
#origibberish#idk. obviously im not a therapist of any sort myself but. i do know that that essentially is the role ive been playing in uquiz convos#and im happy to help but. it does definitely start to weigh on a person#the expectation to have The Right Answer On Who You Are even though i dont really know who i am#and the knowledge that this isnt like. characters im analyzing from a book‚ these are real people with real lives‚ it just. idk.#i keep having to tell people i wont just assign them a new gender and then realizing that like#the fact that im having to do that means that i. could. if i wanted to. and THAT means i have to be careful not to do it by accident either#like. people are coming to me for this bc they see me as an authority figure and if i just went 'nah you dont seem trans' then theyd.#probably listen. at least for a while#i could take the easy way out and just pick whatever answers i want but the entire point is to not do that so of course im not going to but#that doesnt stop people from wanting or expecting it#you want me to be an objective mirror impassively reflecting your true self back to you but that just. isnt possible. im sorry#there is no '''true answer''' for me to unlock for you. there is only the present and the future and what choices you make going forward.#uquibberish#<wasnt sure if i was gonna include this in the tag but. idk i think it probably is important too#i know the conversation is about you and i dont want to make it about me. but. i do want to be considered. at least a little#the disclaimer in my pinned is for yall but it is also for me
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I've gone so far down the kazui mukuhara rabbit hole that I'll listen to any fucking song ever and it'll still remind me of him. FOR EXAMPLE
DO YOU SEE MY VISION....
#like yk the way he wears a mask for the majority of half and the mask is meant to represent his lies and like hiding his true self#yk like putting on a mask becoming someone else on stage actor shit yada yada#SO LIKE. “i know you've been hiding secrets in your past” and kazui mentions thoughts on his mind that he “gave up A LONG TIME AGO”#“whats behind the mask” like asking him to tell the truth and !!! be his true self !! to stop acting !!!#AND THEN LIKE... “curiosity killed this cat/sorry i ever asked” because kazui talks about how hinako would still be alive if he kept lying#it just . reminds me of him#ALOT#and i wasnt expecting it man i was just doing my sphe cba#i cant listen to music normally anymore and its all milgrams fault#milgram#kazui mukuhara#sorry for the ramble im procrastinating having a shower and going to sleep and i also just wanted to share this. discovery#Spotify
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#i forget that tumblr is almost entirely american#because a lot of my mutuals are european#and a lot of british#presumably from liveblogging eurovision and bake off each year#but uh#its kinda annoying when you make a post where youre like hey british mutuals what do you call this thing#with a not british option in the poll#and just a lot of americans start reblogging it and being like ''in true usamerican fashion i clicked before i read''#and its like#i made this poll mostly because i wanted to know how many other british folks call them x#i probably should have been more specific but i wasnt expecting it to get more than like 10 notes#usamericans#thank you for telling me you call them that#but in this such case#i really do not care#not everything is about you#especially when we specify in posts its not#i know its because most of the internet is americanised so yall just assume everything is about you#because most things are#so i shouldn't really be surprised in anyway#but is it too much to ask you guys to at least read the post before voting#i mean i deleted the poll because i do not want to see more tags from it shdjsjjskd#and im writing this in a tag vent post because i dont want to just insult an entire swath of people#because i know a lot of americans and you guys are great#its just frustrating sometimes lmao
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Watched a playthru of Mouthwashing bc of all the hype I've seen and it's really cool! I just think the buzz I saw completely advertised it as something else lolol
Might sit with it some more bc I did like it
#txt#idk i wish i heard more about “the horror is man!” than “the horror is disability!” bc it is there but it wasnt like. the MAIN thing yk?#it wasnt a story ABOUT disability like i was expecting it to be from what i heard people talking about#it was just an ASPECT of the bigger theme of people being the true evil (and you are people)#< dont think i worded that roght#ANYWAY just kind of wishing there was more media from the PERSPECTIVE of the disabled while they are disabled ig#bc thats what i thought i was going into lol#i dont hate that jimmy is the protagonist it WORKS#but now im like weowg wish there was a game that i thought this was gonna be
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me when ihave a dream about my 3rh closest friends all beyeaying me 🤯🤯🤯
#vent#duh#it was sostupid too im jjst. an idiot and emotional and i hate being left out and everyoneknows that wnd that dream has genunlu runed my day#woke up sobbing oops!and in that drupid thing everyome was like get over it itsnkt a big deal like ok sorry. sorry sorrywjqyever#amd none of themare here rigjt now and i miss them all so much and its not fair because ik they wuld never just abandon me for eahc otherbut#everytime i introduce my feiends to each other its like oh duh juli they like each other more! what did u expect! and im the stupidone for#feeling upset at being left out asthey go on witjout me and its like ok talk witjoug me whatever idc but. reallh. really#i was gonan wake up early and do all this stuff but i dont wang to get up anymote im so tired already i feel horrible#idec ab the otjer ppl calling me atupid and emotional or whatever buf ughj b#on the other hand in that dream i did a one pull and got childe twice excepf there were 2 versions of him for some reason???#like u could be childe OR tartaglia ?! idek what fhe difference was one jusg looked younger#erm. anwyay ☺️#post#maes tag#to delete#actually idk if fheyre aroun d rn im kind of too scared to do anything relagimg to them bc what if my nightmare was True!#(def wasnt)
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anyways sry its not srs eventually ill get it together . and be a person again. one day
#its just like atm everything that i need is like . not possible. which is oartially my brain being like We have to do this before we this#which sometimes isnt true but sometimes is#like i cant get medicated again or back seeing a psych or back on t until i get a job again#but i cant get a job again utnil i get my ged <- partially untrue but ged would make it a lot easier#but i cant get my ged until i have a job bc it costs money <- if i asked my parents they would probably help me If they had money 2 spare#since like. yk. they want ne to be able to work again so i have money again and ill be another source of income and they care abt me also .#affirmations . ppl donot just see me as a piggy bank they do see me as a person im not judt someone to squeeze money out of thats not how#ppl view me and its fine its fine its fine its fine . it feels so stupid being scared abt that i feel like a rich person whos like She only#likes me for my money 😭 like stfuuu annoying ass. i just ummmm. have a massive fear of debt and like. ppl demanding money from me#unexpectedly or expecting i am going to give them money. not in like a Ohhh fucking ppl want me to donate not it at all im happy to donate#but in like. god this is dumb. eveeytime i got birthday or christmas money as a kid i had to give it to my parents so they could buy food or#gas or whatever. and it never got paid bsck and it felt like shit. but i couldnt ever say no bc then itd be My fault we didnt have food that#week . yk. my first paycheck i had to give it all to my mom for groceries and we got in a fight in the store bc she was like Ok im gonna go#buy pop and my dumbass got upset abt it bc like. my mom told me itd be Necessities nd like. yk. wtvr. it was fucking stupid my entire family#r caffeine addicts so pop is a necessity i was just. rly upset and it felt like my parents saw my money as just. theirs but they had to ask#abt it so i wouldnt get pissy. yk. and they ask me for money a lot usually for food and i dont mind but it like. idk im rly paranoid abt#being a provider and ive got a Lot of guilt abt like. anytime we dont have enough food it feels like my fault bc it was my fault when i wasa#kid if i didnt give up my christmas money for pizza. or whatever. idk its so dramatic like i didnt need the money i was 8 it was selfish of#me to wanna buy fucking. toys or whatever that wasnt more important than My parents being able to get to work or my siblings being able to#fucking. literally eat. or paying bills. like its selfish that im like wahhh wahhh but i wanted to buy vibeo game wif my bday money i#shouldve judt been fucking grateful i was able to help my family. wtvr. I hate connor. wtvr#n then the shit with ugh last year like. yk. and stuff. and then the them stealing 1000 from me not getting into it b4 i get mad. idk.#and im just lazy now i need to get a job again but all the shit like. as i was saying earlier b4 i started whining. idk. i should be happy#that i get to help w bills and stuff that was my dream as a kid#like ever since i was 5 when i was fantasizing abt my future i was like Im gonna marry a prince and then ill be able to afford to pay all of#my families bills and my parents and siblings will be able to go to college and be happy and maybe never have to work bc ill be able to#handle it and ive always like. yk. when i was a dumbass kid i was like Ill go to college so i can get a good job and be useful. of course i#cant ever go to college bc im fucking. useless. and itd just be another burden on my family if i was in debt bc i couldnt help them as much#if i had debt and itd be selfish. and it doesnt matter bc im too stupid to go to college anyway. idk. i wish i could just fix everything#it just feels awful rn im literally just a drain and my family doesnt say it to me yk like. ik theyre happy imback i think they are
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Honestly tho it's the "I don't love you" and "every time I said it was just automatic impulse" that's got me the most messed up. Like u couldn't even let me down softly by saying it just wasn't working out? You had to essentially tell me the whole thing was a lie??? After I TOLD you I had trust issues and felt like everyone is just going to leave me in the end???
Way to make me feel unlovable lol
#speculation nation#tho of course what has me the Angriest is her breaking up with me over text. that takes the biggest fucking cake.#idk there was a lot said in all of that bullshit. including her admitting she was probably self-sabotaging.#i hate being used as a tool of self harm. being shoved away as a form of self sabotage.#like if youre gonna be a messed up bastard whyd you have to include me in it??? fucking bitch.#i let her know just how pissed off i was. called her every applicable name under the sun.#selfish coward bastard asshole piece of shit bitch. tossed in a few Fuck Yous as well. fully deserved.#and yet she just kept on with that sniveling 'im so sorry' and 'i know ill regret this' and 'i just have to do it'#you didnt have to do anything. you couldve had it poly but you just couldnt look last your infatuation.#also her calling days old feelings Love. as if that kind of immediate and extreme kind of feelings arent By Definition infatuation.#she's in the honeymoon faze. found her nice new fixation. said they understand each other like no one else.#but it's only been Days. how well can you know a person in that time? not very well usually.#threw out a nearly 6 month long relationship just like that. what a joke.#and when she'd brought up just last thursday that our 6 months was coming up (on the 23rd)#and mentioned wanting to do something to celebrate it...#im just like. i guess you really cant know everything in a person huh?#i knew she wasnt perfect but she always treated me so kindly. so considerate and attentive.#who knew she'd be the type to drop me for the new shiny fixation? i sure didnt expect it.#id started to trust that she genuinely liked me. even if i didnt understand why.#but now im back to square one. wondering whether anyone can ever like the true me.#i know theres gotta be someone out there for me. i just... have to find them.
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AAAAA OMFGGG WTFFFF MLB FINALE
#OKOKOKOKOKOK#like#tbh#not far off from what i was expecting BUT ALSO WTF#i really enjoyed it!!!!! like!!!#YEAH IM IN PAIN#like MY BOY DOSENT KNOW HE DOSENT KNOW OMFG SOMEONE TELL HIM#and i wish he had been a bigger part of this whole thing BUT i still Really enjoyed what we got#also not fully sure if thats his mom or not cus the color coding and gabriel flying off into space with her corpse but also if it wasnt her#then why have her so centered in the frame instead of natelie who like was dying#the fight between marrientte and gabe was good#i dont know how theyre gonna make lila a compelling villain like the emotional core isnt there#i liked plaggs true form#tiki was cute 2#that was a fun twist that u didnt make the wish while wearing them but by revealing them#also very exited about evil ladynoir#i also liked noirbugs deisgn expect the 3rd braid was kinda weird tbh...#but the rest was cute!!!#should draw her with my scarlet chat#rambles#cant wait for the angst fics about adiren fidning out. or alt versions where he was there 2 i just#MY BOY DOSNET KNOW 😭😭😭😭😭#he didnt get to confront his shitty dad...#he desvered to get to ounch him in the face#punch#please 😭😭😭😭#crying
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NEW JA REVIEW: im literally nonbinary and i love wearing overalls. happy pride month to nb j&a canon jake
#is it a stereotype that nonbinary people like wearing overalls???? not sure dont remember. its true about me neways#ANYWAYSSSS my actual review is that i liked it!!! which caught me of guard bcs uh. i wasnt expecting to lmao#imo all the post canon insecure jake eps have fallen somewhere between bad and unwatchable. i defo felt like they lost the knack for that#genre of episode after the og canon run ended (and maybe even a little bit before that rip)#BUT like ive been saying this season of j&a RULES so even though i had already decided i didnt like it before. i did like it!! pretty good!#had some funny bits for sure and didnt have the forced energy i personally feel like some of the other insecure jakes have (esp post-canon)#that made them pretty hard to watch for meeeeee tbh#also uhhhhhhhhhhhhh jake looked pretty good in the overalls. im not afraid to say it. ill speak my truth. i wont be silenced on this#also amir actually liking them was pretty cute lmao. put him in overalls too asap i would like 2 see it#but yeah i liked it!!! feels like every month i come on here like “WOAH is anyone else also shocked that the new j&a is ACTUALLY GOOD??????#like maybe i should start having faith in them. i probably wont though. :)
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obviously vote however you want and I respect kazui guilty voter's opinions but if I see one more person say that kazui used hinako i will riot
#like ur opinins are yours but thats just. wrong??#“or perhaps IT COULD COME TRUE.. like.. its FOR THE SAKE OF TRUE LOVE.. who wouldnt lie for that?”#he says “perhaps it could come true” like he married her because he thought it would make him fall in love with her!!!!#it wasnt his intention to use her and he never. did. he was just stuck in a situation he didnt know how to get out of#like i dont like when people villainize hinako to support their kazui arguements but i also dont like it when. its the other way around#the prisoner's r morally grey thats the point nobody there is inheriently evil#also some of you dont know how internalised homophobia works#(this is assuming the gay kazui theory is correct)#like its not just something that. happens. you INTERNAILZE the ideas and view u hear other people say#whether thats society or family or friends or whatever#and seeing as kazui has said that his family are embarrased of him. well.#ive just seen some people say “even if kazui has internalized homophobia it isnt an excuse” and like.. yeah its not its a reason#but like. thats not an easy thing to deal with (ESPECIALLY if it because of family views) like thats not just something you shake off#idk.. i just feel like people are dismissing his a big part of his character being about societal expectations on love#okay. rant over#milgram#kazui mukuhara
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