#like how many people has he actually had to influence on purpose? how many just fell for him on sight and didn't question it?

[the-angel-of-the-bottomless-pit]

reasons why i like rire

scary

tits

"puppy"

endless breedings and no babies (perfect deal)

his grabbable hips

so gender he could just be anything

sharp teeth

extremely cunt clothes

could crush my neck in his hand

impeccable class

long hair

the soul patch.

TENTACLES

[usagifuyusummer]

Is this what you meant @jjimene123, on the Timmy Turner and Pink Diamond parallels lmao?

Been thinking abt this quote from end of an era!! It makes me THINK

[murderofsomeone]

it's probably decently obvious that my main lemon demon design was created BEFORE seeing any fandom depictions (or even really that much official art past the logo) because of how violently he stands out in comparison to other designs. it's a little obvious that my inspiration was self-contained and it granted me a bit of creative freedom along with a completely different train of thought while designing him. his three eyes however is very much a relic of 2022 because I was designing a lot of demons with asymmetrical faces at the time and well, why not make another

anyway here's a comparison of him to my most recent lemon demon original design (where it's a bit more obvious I was influenced by somewhat of a fandom culture)

extra bonus rambling under the cut

my general design process has actually stayed relatively contained with a few exceptions like soft fuzzy man's color and weirdly neil himself. yeah sorry chat neil is the first guy that was highly influenced by someone else's design you can shoot me too if you'd like. but I legitimately believe he's the only real example because every other character that has a design remotely similar to someone else is likely due to us both following a similar source material (like my cabinet design being based off polybius) or there being only so many ways to interpret the design (gef the mongoose would've fallen into this category if it wasn't for the fact I made him Joker colors)

in general I tend to follow a mindset of how "weird" I can make a design or how much I can push a lyric/implement it into a design. I also like to twist around the convention and try new things. a good example of both of these apply to my doctor amnesia design.

really the main things going through my head were "well he didn't state HOW many eyes", chosing an eye color that often is overlooked in conventional beauty standards to elevate them and cause you to think, while leaning into the somewhat otherworldly nature she's depicted in by giving her blue skin, a color I associate with the song.

another fun thing I'll do is create a "design pipeline" where I'll take an attribute and run it through a list of connections before we end up in a place long past where we started or just combining a bunch of traits that could be interpreted that way, resulting in designs like this.

though wolfgang isn't my weirdest design, he definitely did not start where we ended off. I believe before the wizard of oz theming for clown circus was set in stone (a choice that has EVERYTHING to do with oz explodes and an element I'll explain later), he was some kinda mirror object head that had absolutely nothing to do with his current namesake. since I wasn't satisfied with that design, I kept a relative aspect of the personality and shapes and thus ended up creating a really interesting take on a character who is largely depicted as... well there's no really good way to say this, but Bad.

since I was working with a new fresh aspect I started by making him a wolf... and then connecting him to "there's a robot in my head". this kind of connected the dots to ultimately make him associated to the tin man, since no one was connected to that character for the wizard of oz element and it was up for grabs (this is also how he somehow got associated with toasters via connecting the previously mentioned song to "what's in the toaster", etc etc). these pipelines of connecting songs that aren't normally related, but making them Work in a believable way makes designs more interesting for me and gives them a bit more purpose and personality. I think this is what ultimately makes people get a bit lost on my interpretations considering they aren't super simple by just being about One Song, but by being about multiple that aren't originally related in the source material. just like how I connected dr amnesia to when he died, explaining a bit of her more mildly supernatural or off-putting elements by making the man in that song her father.

the final real design element that I focus on is the strange rule I follow in terms of how these characters are shaped. there's a massive sort of "alice in wonderland" theming going on in terms of how human/humanoid designs look in contrast to designs that look less and less human. their proportions become more cartoon and shaped, their sizes are affected etc etc all while the human/humanoid characters stay relatively normal next to each other with more believable design elements.

here's the horrid long strip of nearly 100 different character renders next to each other to get a general idea on what I'm talking about

the silhouettes of the human characters "pop" less because they're supposed to contrast to their nonhuman counterparts. which isn't something I normally do, but given the source idea of a sort of "wonderland", I think it works in this specific context.

in conclusion: I'm design autistic and like to use designing to try new things, which is why I fucked that lemon up. sorry about that chat

[linktotheheart]

One of my personal favorite legend of zelda headcanons is that Lynels were either not always bestial monsters who would attack on sight (or can evolve to be an intelligent social race after being freed from Ganon's influence, but I like the deep lore of them having been corrupted by Ganon and being able to return to their previous state once he is gone).

They're already clearly very intelligent. They're the only enemy that can figure out you're not a Lynel when you're wearing the Lynel mask just by looking at you. They're able to fire an arrow up into the air and hit you even if you're standing behind an object that obscures you. They switch from ranged to melee weapons based on how far you are from them. It shows they have some reasoning abilities and even understanding of physics beyond a very base instinctual level.

I like to imagine that Lynels would still be largely solitary creatures in their uncorrupted state, sometimes moving about in small groups based in either family units or teams united for a common purpose. But maybe they did at one point in the very distant past have a homeland where they could congregate, perhaps outside Hyrule which is why it's unknown in the present.

I think they'd actually be very academic, and would travel a lot to study and document in their chosen field, hence the largely nomadic lifestyle. The combination of hardy hooves and dextrous hands would help them easily traverse places that would be impassible for normal hooved creatures and footed creatures alike. They are capable of feats of both great strength and delicate dexterity, and once produced great works of art.

Given the way they seek out very high, isolated places, astronomy may have been a common chosen field of study.

Their fall was concurrent with the beginning of the imprisoning war, which was the first time they were recorded appearing in Hyrule in official histories. They had previously traveled into the wilds of Hyrule, but any accounts made by people of the time were lost to the ages, and the accounts from the war only survived due to the fact that so many Lynels appeared together that they were witnessed by many people.

I like the idea of, after the events of ToTK, the Lynels regaining their full intelligence and appearing to speak to Zelda. Link immediately moves to attack but everyone is startled when the Lynel speaks. Zelda orders Link to stand down and gives him the chance to explain, and he does so and offers allyship of his people, who mean to reestablish a society outside of Hyrule. Zelda offers aid and they accept, and though all the races of Hyrule are extremely nervous about them, they start to interact and work together.

Also, in any story where a version of Ganondorf is saved, is able to return and be reformed, etc, the Lynels at first regard him as a mortal enemy for what he did to their people, and only eventually tolerate him if he proves he has changed (or, alternatively was corrupted by a being/force like Demise himself, in which case many Lynels actually turn around and accept him and mourn over what was done to all of them together).

I have so many fanfic ideas now, tbh.

[yuurei20]

Hello hello. If I don't mind asking, what's this Crowley's fan theory rejecting Deuce's application for a Magical Wheel club about?

Hello hello!! Thank you for this question! (and apologies for the delay!)

Crowley's rejection of Deuce's application for a Magical Wheel club is one of many threads connecting back to a popular theory that Crowley is making the overblots happen on purpose!

It encompasses many things, such as the three light-magic users: Kalim's enrollment is particularly suspicious, as he received his letter of acceptance a month into what would become his first year at the school.

Jamil observes, "And just like that, my nice, free campus life went up in smoke."

Kalim was homeschooled prior to NRC and Jamil says, "Some days I just didn't want to go straight home after school" (where he would have to tutor Kalim, in addition to his other duties as Kalim's servant).

Did Crowley (or someone 👀) intentionally give Jamil those two months of freedom so that he would feel the loss of that freedom all the more acutely, contributing to his overblot?

The admissions process may have been more straightforward for Silver and I do not believe we have heard anything about Rook's, but both characters were, like Kalim, the catalyst to their respective housewardens overblotting:

It is Rook who convinces Vil to watch Neige's rehearsal (which is what finally compromises Vil's tentative mental stability, and it is Crowley who put Vil in charge of production for the VDC), and Malleus' overblot is immediately preceded by a conversation with Silver.

There is also Ruggie, who says (twice) that it is rare for people from his home to become mages and who had never attended a school prior to NRC. He is an odd choice for a prestigious magic academy.

He has also only become a "middling" student thanks to Leona's tutoring, and Leona's desire to help secure a future for students like Ruggie has a significant influence on Leona's overblot.

(A point that is emphasized in the novel: "I cannot let the pack starve.")

Crowley offers the choice of retiring Malleus from the tournament in Book 2 in a decision that the famously perceptive Vil says “reeks of unconscious bias.”

Crowley also goes out of his way to emphasize how many Savanaclaw students aspire to play in the Spelldrive Pro Leagues, how Savanaclaw has lost in the first round to Diasomnia two years in a row, and how it is affecting their future.

Leona points out that he seems to be telling them to quit while they are ahead because he expects them to make fools of themselves.

When Crowley denies this, saying, "That is not my intention," Leona asks, "Then what is?"

Is it possible that Crowley never intended to retire Malleus at all, but he knew that threatening to do so would be the final straw needed to push Leona into desperation? Making him desperate enough to contract with Azul, which connects directly to his destroying of Azul’s contracts to cover up the evidence, thus instigating Azul’s own overblot?

This also ties in to some interesting coincidences around certain school events:

Savanaclaw being paired against Diasomnia in the first round of the Spelldrive Tournament every year since Malleus enrolled?

The members randomly selected for the Starsending? For Glorious Masquerade?

(Idia: "How do three Housewardens just 'coincidentally' get drawn in a raffle? That box is rigged." - Trey: "The headmage claimed he used astrology to pick us...you don't think he was lying about that, do you?")

Have all these things been as coincidental as Crowley claims, or are the suspicions of students like Trey and Idia correct and there is more going on than it seems?

There is also the inconsistency of Crowley’s money-mongering.

Is he actually interested in perks like 10% of profits from Mostro Lounge and donations from Kalim’s and Idia’s parents, or is that just his cover-up to get Jack (and thus Leona) to interfere with Azul, and to get Kalim and Ortho to NRC?

Then there is Crowley's encouraging of Ace to battle Riddle, and it is not impossible for him to be the anonymous person who reported on the school's overblotters in Book 6.

Idia himself asks, "Could someone be inducing overblots on PURPOSE...?"

To return to the original question: Magical Wheels are a hobby that Deuce has in common with Epel, as both characters discover about each other in Book 5.

Epel and Vil bond (briefly) over a blastcycle in Epel's dorm vignette, and Deuce goes on a long monologue about the freedom of blastcycles to Ace:

"If you're ever feeling blue, you just get on a blaster and tune out the world...I haven't been able to since the first day of school."

This all ties back to an even wider theory about time loops: is Crowley reliving these scenarios over and over again, and granting Deuce and Epel the stress relief of a blastcycle club resulted in an undesirable ending?

If the freedom of their own club (and being able to confide in each other earlier on) resulted in them not going to the extremes that they did in Book 5 in order to escape Ace and Vil, it is possible that Deuce did not learn his unique magic in time to stop Vil.

And that fight on the beach that led to Deuce's UM? Was over a blastcycle!

To get Deuce and Epel down to that beach for that fight they had to be feeling stressed, trapped and desperate, to the point that they were willing to break campus rules (or were flustered to the point of forgetting the rules existed, in Deuce's case) to get there: and what better an opportunity than a long-awaited chance to finally ride one of the blastcycles they have both loved for years, but Crowley has been denying them?

No fight on the beach may have meant no UM for Deuce, which may have resulted in Vil winning the overblot fight and Crowley needing to reset the world in order to try again--and this time, without a Blastcycle club.

It is all theory and conjecture :> But very fun to think about!

[changbinsboobs]

Can you please do Stray kids, what physical traits they look for and how would they act around they crush 👀please and thank you if you have done it

Hi:) i just posted a reading on physical traits💗

I also have a reading on skz on how they are when they have a crush but its more focused on their internal state of being, so I'm gonna do a separate one on their specific, outwards behavior towards their crush specifically! Enjoy💗

I'll be using the 3rd Eye Tarot and remember :

*This reading is for entertainment purposes only!

How would stray kids behave around their crush?

Chan - The High Priestess, Page of Cups

He mimics his crush a lot. Like not in a mean way or intentional. Yk this psychology fact that we unintentionally mimic our crushes or people we like/admire, cuz we want them to like us too. I think he's doing that A LOT unconsciously but for the person on the other side i think its pretty obvious, pretty quickly😂

I also think that he would try and change himself a bit. Like his appearance or his likes and dislikes - according to his crush. I think it would be unconscious tho. Not like he thinks "oh she likes guys with blue hair so im gonna dye my hair blue". Its more like his crushes opinion just influences him a lot. Other than that im not seeing much i think he just matches his crushes energy and i wanna say pace too, but im unsure. So just leave it at he matches his crush😂 and he kinda copys them. Whatever his crushes behaviour is to him, that would be his behaviour to them.

Lee Know - Ace of Wands, 6 of Cups

He's normal and nurturing. I don't think his crush would think he's flirting with them, they would just think that he's really kind and helpful and has a big heart to give love and care from. So his approach isn't very demanding(?). Like whatever he does for his crush, u can feel he doesn't do it cuz he expects something in return, but because he genuinely likes them and wants them to be good.

I also see him making some advances but like...ugh idk, like his crush can't really tell if its flirting or if he's just a touchy person or if his humor's just a little perverted. Like what im seeing is a few perverted comments and an evil smile or something😂 and i think his crush would be a bit confused at that but not really take it as a sign of flirting or interest towards them. (Btw the 6 of Cups has already come a few times in his readings! He's definitely a very nurturing person!!!)

Changbin - 9 of Pentacles, 8 of Swords, Queen of Cups

Changbin of course had the most cards😂 he had so many cards (7 in total) im too lazy to write them all up there, so im just gonna write the 3 most significant ones. Also this is something i notice a lot with his readings he almost always has the most cards cuz i keep feeling theres more he wants to say, and that he's not done yet, so i keep drawing more and more. Then when i look at them i have 9 cards and 3 if them say thing A, 3 say thing B and 3 say thing C😂 like...my guy you could've just let me say all that in 3 cards m, why'd u make me work so much😂 i feel like its very important to him to describe the details and to explain everything the best way he can so that he does not get misunderstood. And details for him are very meaningful and actually very big, so he pays lots of attention to that and finds it important and wants it to be clear to the readers as well (or whoever's listening)

Sooo he tries to put himself in a good light. Like put his macho on, his gentlemanness, act nonchalant and poised(?), flex his wealthyness a little😂 (i love reading this😂💗)

But at the same time i see him being plagued by his thoughts an fears (literary the same cards as the previous crush reading came on) and thus why i feel like he would be giving mixed signals. Like being awkward one second, avoiding his crush, going out of their way, barely responding, barely having eye contact. To being stern and cold, acting almost as he doesn't like them or is angry at them or something. To being so genuinely kind and welcoming and i see even going for some slight, friendly skinship. To being boastful and slightly flirty again😂 its a rollercoaster i think every time his crush would be getting a different changbin. And maybe not even on different occasions. Maybe they can get 3 different version in one day alone.😂 poor girl.

I also see him having a hot-cold streak in his verbal communication too. Like one minute he's mimicking them (like chan), the other he's jokingly mocking them, annoying them, trying to get them a bit agitated and triggered even😂 he wants to get a reaction out of her. (God i think next time ill leave changbin's reading for last, every time im doing him i get so exhausted and i hope im already at the end of the reading (the whole post), but im not even halfway cuz he's so far up🥲. Now i did him first cuz he had so much cards, and now i wann cry cuz i have ti do 7 more guys🥲)

Hyunjin - Temperance, 10 of Wands

I think he's pretty calm around his crush. Tbh i don't see him making any impression of that kind. I think his mind is way too preoccupied to actually do something.

He might seem clumsy. Stutter, make weird sentences, have s bit if weird facial expressions. All of that is i feel whenever he gets into close contact with his crush. If u look at him from afar he's calm and collected and cool and poised. But if you come up close and actually converse with him he would be rally awkward.

Han - 5 of Pentacles, Wheel of Fortune

Ughh...a bit of a looser i fear. Like he's behavior would be very off putting. Like those pick me guys😭 ugh im getting such an ick.

He would be mostly like that, but every once in a while would have a moment where he shines and suddenly gets a boost of confidence and just is being himself and them he does so so well. Rally well! But that doesn't last long sadly and he becomes a pick me shortly after once again.🥲

Felix - 7 of Cups, King of Cups

Proactive. Isn't afraid to approach them. Just shamelessly goes up there and gives them a compliment, makes small talk, ask for a number or a date or whatever. I would say he's pretty smooth but he actually isnt😅 but it doesn't really matter cuz even if his approach isn't smooth, his energy is, and lots of people perceive only that. His overwhelming energy of confidence.

He might think a lot of them and give them small random gifts he thinks they will like, or that reminded him of him. Each time he gets the opportunity to be close to them again and talk to them.

Seungmin - The Emperor, Queen if Pentacles

Very helpful, very initiative, very supportive. He immediately shows how reliable he is. He proves his seriousness and that he's not in it just for the game but for a purpose.

Very stable and straight forward with his feelings and intentions.

Shows patience and doesn't pressure his crush all too much. Just leaves them in peace to warm up to him, while continuously showing up and being there. Reminding her of his high quality and value.

I.N - 3 of Wands, 4 of Pentacles

Straight forward with his feelings and pursuing. I think he's someone that as soon as he realizes he has a crush he goes over there to confess😂 brave guy that one!

He's very possessive of his crush even if they aren't together yet snd i think he would often show that in some ways, like wanting to walk beside her, wanting to take care of her, to answer her questions, to buy her food or other stuff. He doesn't want her to do those stuff by herself or even worse to ask other men about it. Or even allow other men to do that for her. Who are they to allow themselves that😂 only he can take care of her!!!😤😂

[tiredsurvivoronmain]

When they were talking about Wesker, I can't help but when he said this to Jill (when she said it was like living in a nightmare being controlled), I think he was also talking about himself when he said this.

He had only just opened up to her about Piers (apparently the first time he's told her about him years after his death), and it almost felt as if he was confessing his guilt/loss and that he had planned on retiring, Piers being the one to take over from him. He looked vulnerable telling her, the way he held the water bottle with both hands as if he needed something to hold and ground him, like it took real effort to open up (he's still affected by Piers' death). When it came to Wesker, him 'opening up' carried over and he may have confessed how he felt about Wesker still being in his mind, memories and nightmares. It could have also been Piers he was having nightmares about and he struggled to come to terms with the loss. Not necessarily in a romantic sense but it's obvious losing Piers hit him hard. However his relationship/rivalry with Wesker was longer and more intense, it would make sense that he'd still feel that connection to him like an old scar that won't fade and gives him pain. He also uses replicas/weapons that were Wesker's, if he wanted to be done with Wesker, why use them at all? Would he have not had other alternative weapons to choose from? Wesker's dead (as far as he's concerned) yet he still has that connection to him. If he was the one who commissioned the series of weapons or was the one to name them after Wesker... Did he do it to honour his memory? Or that he wanted something of Wesker or that connection with him to stay? And what would Jill have thought of it? Chris using replica weapons of the man that controlled her and made her live a nightmare? "And if you're not careful, it'll swallow you up." Perhaps he said that because that's what has happened to him, that the nightmares of Wesker have consumed him or had at one point consumed him.

The why he looked and acted empty after killing Wesker, you'd think he'd be happy or relieved it was over like the others were. Maybe he was at first but after a while the emptiness began to settle; he trained for so long to fight Wesker, he had a purpose and a goal. When Wesker was gone it left a void that needed to be filled. But something that had such an impact and influence on his life would have left him feeling empty. In a way, he killed part of his identity that day.

Then there's this scene in RE6

WHY was Chris prepared to die because he killed Wesker? As if he felt guilty or regretted it? He didn't know Jake personally, he didn't try to defend his actions or explain that Wesker was trying to destroy the world. Yet he willingly confessed and felt he deserved to be shot for killing him.

It took Chris a strangely long time to answer, why did he have to even think it over? He wanted to take Wesker down for personal reasons and because he was ordered to, it should have been a quick and obvious answer. My guess is that he was having flashbacks to Wesker, possibly his final moments. The way he sounded when he answered was as if he had no choice but to kill Wesker, that it wasn't for the same personal reasons he had before. He had to kill him in the same way of putting down a rabid dog, to protect people and to put it out of it's misery/pain. "I had to, he wouldn't stop. He was beyond saving."

Whether he felt actual guilt/regret for killing Wesker or it was merely a very dangerous tactic to get through to Jake, it's hard to say.

Ironically, there have been many occasions Wesker has aimed a gun at Chris and never fired, not even to miss for plot or as a warning. Jake, his son, did what Wesker couldn't in his 10 years of rivalry with Chris.

And of course, this scene in the RE1 remaster.

I've talked about this in another post but long story short, he still cared about Wesker despite being betrayed by him, that just moments ago shot Rebecca. Chris laughed and mocked him seconds before and was held at gun point, but the moment Wesker got attacked he immediately tried to help/save him. He cared.

And he still did, even after his death. Using Wesker weapon replicas, protecting and defending his son, possibly still having Wesker's STARS knife from the events of Code Veronica...he needs to have something of Wesker to be part of him. Whatever his reasons, despite all the pain, anger and hatred, he refuses to let him go and let the past be buried. He is both haunted and embracing the ghost of Wesker. The longer the absence of Wesker goes on, the more Chris is changing. Deep down he may have been hoping, wanting, Wesker to come back. 10 years pass and there's still no sign of him, the realisation turning into grief and regret. Wesker gave Chris purpose (just like how Chris gave Wesker purpose), now that purpose was gone, things just aren't the same anymore and there's nothing he can do to get him back. Wesker may have been right after all; their fates really are forever intertwined.

[fatalism-and-villainy]

Rewatching season 2 had me really struck by the sheer amount of time Will spends performing for other people, and how few fully authentic interactions he has. In fact, I’d say one of the biggest through lines between the first and second halves of the season is Will learning how to wear masks, and then actively deploying that for the purpose of catching Hannibal.

(And how fitting is it that the promo for season 2 had Will wearing the iconic hockey mask? Not just a franchise in-joke, but a reflection of the fact that he “becomes” Hannibal in this season, begins to symbolically merge with him, to the point in which his own goals become clouded to him.)

It's a natural extension of season 1's establishment of his empathic abilities, where he begins to more actively use his ability to read other people and discern their motivations as a tool, or weapon. Simply telling the truth about his innocence doesn’t serve him - so he adapts a façade very quickly, in his faked tears for Hannibal and Alana. All of his interactions with others while in prison - Chilton, Lounds, Matthew Brown, etc. - are very deliberately engineered, and lean into what Will knows (or thinks) each person wants to hear - all setting the stage for him doing the same thing to Hannibal. Every word, everything about his intonation, is so precise - something that specifically struck me in this stretch of episodes was when he talks to Gideon and very carefully leans forward as he’s trying to drive his point home:

(And the body language, interestingly enough, is not just persuasive, but also mirrors the way Gideon sometimes leans/dangles his arms out of the cage when talking to others - and it reminds me of Will also mirroring Hannibal’s body language during the “not now that I finally find you interesting” scene, when he bites his lip in the way Hannibal so often does.)

It really highlights how so much of how he interacts with others during this entire stretch of the plot is a very carefully crafted performance, with so many of Will’s actual feelings and motivations subsumed into his manipulations. I remember watching the DVD commentary on Su-zakana, and they talk about how Will’s visible surliness with Hannibal was meant to stem from the fact that he didn’t want to be too friendly with Hannibal right away, because it would look suspicious. And I think that gets at something that’s present with how both Will and Hannibal manipulate others - they’re not necessarily lying about their feelings, just consciously using genuine feelings or motivations as a method of influencing others. With Hannibal, he frequently does feel genuine affection for others, and his care for them stems from that, but it’s also often used to put them at ease, serve his own ends. Will, for his part, is genuinely angry with Hannibal, but actively uses those feelings to fashion an aura of standoffishness. And of course, Hannibal has a genuine pull for him, and he deliberately leans into and cultivates that enjoyment for the sake of entrapping Hannibal. …Which of course leads to a situation where he has to put on a show for Jack as well, in which he downplays how deep into it he’s getting.

So it’s entirely fitting that the opening of Mizumono features the two halves of Will’s face - the front he’s presenting to Hannibal, and the front he’s presenting to Jack - merging, mask-like, in the middle of the screen.

They’re both the real him, and they’re both masks - and he gets so subsumed into his performances for others, the modulation and accentuation and sublimation of his feelings that they require, that he gets lost to himself (and is also terribly lonely and isolated). No wonder he’s confused and unmoored in early season 3.

[brf-rumortrackinganon]

I don't know if you have enough data to answer this, but I believe that the Sussexes are becoming more irrelevant, people have just lost interest: do you get the same number of rumors nowadays as you did a couple of years ago? Or less?

What's your "sentiment" about this, if you feel inclined towards a little speculation?

I don’t have any quantitative data, this is just based on my observations.

First, the media’s interest in the Sussexes has dropped significantly. It used to be that they had new stories on them daily. Every day, no matter the occasion or what else was happening. Now, it’s about once a week, if that. (Excluding when they’re on “foreign tours”.)

Second, they’re not organic discussions on social media. They aren’t in the algorithms unless there’s a huge PR push (aka $$$) involved, like with the recent ARO product “launches” or the rumormongering about Kate’s health/the Waleses’ marriage. That means people aren’t talking about them until they’re paid to talk about them and then they go to work with trending topics and algorithm manipulations.

Third, there was a huge reckoning during the pandemic that saw an enormous shift away from the celebrity influencer culture of the ‘10s. People aren’t paying attention to celebrities just because they’re pretty or famous or wealthy anymore. People are paying attention to, and supporting, people who have values, who do something, who are meaningful.

That’s not the Sussexes. The Sussexes - Meghan more so than Harry (because Harry still offers purpose through Invictus Games, but he destroyed a lot of it with the whining in Spare) - are trapped in their “famous for being famous” mindset that was the late ‘90s - mid ‘10s. They haven’t evolved as the culture and as society has evolved. Meghan tried, with all those bandwagon trends and topics she spouted 2018 - 2021, but they always failed because everyone could clearly see she didn’t actually care about those things, she was only using them. So people aren’t giving them attention because they don’t fit the current model for our idea celeb. (And that’s why you see a lot of celebs hustling with their own companies and brands or charities now, separate from their acting or music or modeling - the market has shifted from their pretty faces to the contributions they give to society at large.)

Fourth, the Sussexes greatly overestimated the Oprah interview and their “revenge era” against the BRF (the time from Oprah to Spare when they were, more or less, gossiping about the BRF and whining about not having enough privilege). Their expectation was that everyone would be on their side and we would all condemn the BRF with them. They overestimated and misunderstood that the global majority of the world a) respected The Queen as much as we did, b) saw it was completely ducked up to have done the Oprah interview while Philip was literally dying (and also the Sussexes’ claim that “they’re just saying he’s sick so we don’t do this interview” was all sorts of inappropriate), and c) would never air our own family’s dirty laundry in public like that and judged them horrendously for doing that to The Queen and the BRF while their patriarch was dying. That alienated a lot of people and the result wasn’t “all hail Harry and Meghan, Royal Freedom Fighters” (which was the Sussexes’ expectation); it was “who the f@&k do they think they are” (especially after Fleet Street published about all the lies they told during the interview with receipts).

And finally, the biggest indicator that they’ve become irrelevant is the blogs here. Just look at how many blogs have stopped posting or changed their content. There’s a huge group of bloggers that left or lost interest, and the blogs that remain tend to fall on either side of the spectrum: they either love the Sussexes or they hate them. There’s no middle ground anymore, and it kinda does actually suck. It doesn’t mean the neutral/middle blogs and anons and readers don’t exist (they do, they’re here, I see them on my dash and in my mentions) but they’re lurking more than engaging. The people engaging are people that either love or hate the Sussexes, so there’s a lot of “same” being blogged and discussed. (It’s why I’ve not been posting recently - I get bored when we talk about the same things over and over so I check out for a bit until I can think of something (or see something) different to change the conversation with or I get anons with questions (like this one) that scratch an itch in my brain.)

So to that question, yes, the Sussexes are becoming irrelevant. They’ve become quite irrelevant if you go by the media and social media that was happening in 2017 when they got engaged.

For your question about the rumors and theories, yes. There’s been a huge drop off in those as well. I used to be updating my spreadsheet daily with all the gossip and discussions happening, but now, it’s just once or twice a month. I will admit that part of that is because the sources I used have become venomously anti-Sussex or anti-Kate and I’m just not interested in that so I don’t go to those places as much anymore. But another part of it is that there’s just an absence of people talking about it. The people left discussing the Sussexes are, again, either you love ‘em or you hate ‘em and that brings a certain bias to the rumor mill and the conspiracy theories, which can actually become very toxic very easily because there’s no one left to moderate or play devil’s advocate to remind everyone that these are real people with real families and real lives; yes, running away with your imagination is fun but it’s also not a realistic barometer of who these people (the subjects of the gossip, the sources of the gossip, and the consumers of the gossip) are.

And I think when you’re left with the two extremes of the spectrum - haters and lovers - that’s the ultimate show of irrelevance. The “middle” (or the silent majority, if you will) has completely noped out of the conversation and doesn’t have even a rat’s ass to give you.

That’s why all the Sussexes have left is either divorce or reconciliation with Charles, William, and Kate. If either one of those things happen, they’ll suddenly become relevant again. But they don’t either of those. They can’t afford either of those options reputation-wise because both options end with egg on their faces and a global chorus of “I told you so” from family, press, and the public.

So they’ll just stay stuck getting more and more irrelevant because their egos are too enormous to allow being served some serious humble pie.

[jakowskis]

have i talked about my headcanon that jack and owen hooked up a few times pre-s1. i think it makes a lot of sense considering they're both characters who default to the intimacy of sex as a coping mechanism. owen would've been hurting and seeking comfort after katie and jack likes to feel like he's helping people. i don't think it's a reach to say that at some point early on owen might've been trying to drink himself to death, jack showed up to take him home, and owen impulsively (and angrily) tried to kiss him, like that could 100% be canon to me. and they very possibly could've slept together, too, depending on how you think jack would handle that situation. i always felt there was a palpable sexual tension between them in the early eps of s1, and you can read that as torchwood's token flirtatiousness and the way every single combination of characters has a 'will they wont they' going on, but considering they're the two most likely to actually act on attraction, maybe they already had smth by the time we first meet them. and idc how this fandom views them, to me they're absolutely mutually physically attracted to each other. like, come on. it's torchwood.

more than anything though i think it'd explain owen's weird preoccupation with ianto + his relationship with jack, and the way he's, of all things, competitive with him in particular - in a way he's not with gwen, who also gets a lot of jack's attention. if jack and owen hooked up once or twice but it was very casual / probably even kind of combative, but then jack chose to have a romantic relationship with ianto, i could very easily imagine some part of owen, regardless of whether or not he actually wants jack in any capacity, feeling like "why would he want him over me? what the hell's the teaboy got that i don't??" we already know owen feels... insufficient, as far as his importance in jack's life (i think 'i found my doctor.' 'did he fix you?' says sooo much), i think he badly craves being important within torchwood, obviously, but just as equally, being important and useful to jack - and considering how sex kind of influences everything with owen, i could just very easily see that manifesting in a brief no-strings situation. again, very early on; jack acting on attraction to his angry new employee (his substitute doctor,) who's so very desperate to be saved and given new purpose by him (and isn't that good for jack's ego, too), who hates him and wants desperately to please him in equal measure, and owen acting on a desire to please his new boss, to try to ensure this job's a sure thing even though he's been acting out and not showing up at times, and what a fine way to self-destruct, to self-punish, too, sleeping with the man he blames for his fiancee's death and who's surely gonna lead him to his death.

i just. hrgh. i love how much fucked up shit you can do with jack/owen, like there's so many dark miserable things to play with there. i love it

[total-drama-brainrot]

hi idk if this has been said but . pls hear my vision… lindsay and noah platonic duo. brains and the beauty. noahs the brains. lindsays the beauty. noahs like “jeez this girl is dumb i cn manipulate her or smth” but then he starts warming up to her and they like paint eachothers nails and talk about boys or somthing idk please theyre besties trust 🤞

(also noah finally gets a makeover courtesy of lindsay)

I think I might've mentioned this exact duo before, though I may be wrong about that. Regardless, I've had Many A Thought about the potential dynamic between Lindsay "reclaiming bimbo as a term of empowerment" and Noah "could be god's biggest hater but was nerfed with an inability to GAF", to the point where I have a few drafts exploring this exact concept.

Through the lens of my eyes (blurry as it would be, my prescription fairly strong), I don't think Noah would ever consider manipulating Lindsay- at least, not in a similar manner to the likes of Heather or Alejandro. He's shown in canon to be pretty adverse to the idea. Why else would he make those comments about Alejandro in "I See London..."?

Not that he doesn't think about how easy it would be to use her. But his morality wins out over his scheming thoughts pretty quickly- no one wants to be New Heather, after all.

However, he's also shown a capacity to explore sneakier options of deception and trickery; pretending to pass out during the 20k run in The Big Sleep, trying to excuse his comment about Alejandro under the guise of it "being a compliment where he's from", tricking the Sasquatch with his fake ball throwing, getting himself eliminated on purpose in Dodgebrawl. I'm trying to think of other examples In Canon off the top of my head, but I'm coming up short since most of his actual speaking lines in the show are 'zingers' and 'witty one-liners' instead of actual character moments.

And we also know, from the way he treats Owen, that he's a lot more patient and indulgent towards the... 'slower' or 'simpler' contestants. He very rarely gets mad at Owen's mistakes- see how he gently chastises him in "Super Happy Crazy Fun Time Japan" when he's disturbing their set, he'd pretty much gentle parenting him, or how he doesn't even raise his voice against Owen after being blasted by nose-shake in "I See London...". You could argue that Owen just has best friend privileges, but given the way he also talks about his dog I think Noah just has a soft spot for happy-go-lucky, heart-of-gold, kind of stupid people (and blondes). Sound familiar?

Lindsay would fall under this umbrella of 'treat with kindness' because of this, but that doesn't mean he wouldn't try to subtly nudge her in the 'right direction'- out of Heather's and/or Alejandro's influence and into his own. For her own safety, of course.

Not that I think he'd even like Lindsay at first. The two of them are opposite ends of the social spectrum; I'd take a while for Lindsay to break through his snarky exterior, but I think eventually Noah would realise that she isn't the 'two-faced airhead popular girl' he'd assumed her to be and quickly warm up to her (she's airheaded, sure, but there's nothing two-faced or nefarious/mean-spirited about Lindsay). It's a classic case of "extrovert adopts introvert".

Meanwhile, Lindsay would be dead-set on breaking Noah out of his sour little shell. Either because she overhears Owen/Izzy/Eva explaining how Noah struggles to make friends because he's "very shy" and "mixes up his insults and his compliments", thus she assumes that, hey, Noah's made fun of her a few times, maybe that was just him trying to be friendly? So she makes it her mission to reciprocate his efforts and befriend him (much to Noah's initial suspicion, and begrudging appreciation).

Or she gets the concept of a 'gay best friend' stuck in her head (an impressive feat, getting anything stuck in such a vacant space /j) probably from watching too many high school teen dramas, and sees Noah as the ideal candidate since he pretty much embodies most of the stereotypical GBF traits; a sassy twink who's defining characteristic is making snarky comments. If Noah ever caught wind of this, he'd either be mortified by the concept and avoid Lindsay like the plague until she'd eventually hunt him down, or he'd think the whole concept is too funny to pass up and gladly play the part- if only for his own amusement. (Personally I headcanon him as bi, but he's so canonically queer coded that he fits the stereotype anyway.)

Which is all just a long-winded way of me saying I think Lindsay would kindle the friendship without giving Noah much of a choice (again, extrovert adopting introvert) and Noah would just go along with it, being the lazy guy he is, and quickly grow fond/protective over her.

If he and Owen are the golden retriever and black cat dynamic, Noah and Lindsay are an afghan hound and a black cat; Noah has a lot of black cat energy (that's just a given) and you cannot tell me that Lindsay isn't an afghan hound- they're pretty, gentle-natured and renown for their low intelligence.

Plus, Lindsay's capacity for meanness (as unintentional as it may be) would be comedy gold to Noah. He'd encourage her to keep that sharp tongue and steel spine, if not for his own entertainment, then to ensure she doesn't become someone else's doormat again. In return, Lindsay would bring out a softer side of Noah, likely a result of her reminding him of his several older sisters.

She'd absolutely abuse her 'soft Noah' privileges too by roping him in on sleepovers where the two of them gossip and paint each other's nails (Noah's against the idea at first but Lindsay hits him with the puppy eyes and he folds like a lawn chair), eventually leading to Lindsay giving Noah a much needed glow up. He finds himself enjoying the pampering- though he'd never admit it- and Lindsay's just ecstatic that she has someone to use as a dress-up doll (Tyler wouldn't let her give him another makeover after Paris).

[deuxcherise]

Collar Crimes: Red Letter

C/w: Unhealthy behavior, yandere OC, yandere male, Eris being Eris, gender neutral reader, reader has some personality in this one, comfort, fluff, angst (?), mentions violence (eye plucking), flashback scene, may include annoying use of "my" a lot, includes a picture of a simple sponge cake (because why not? You'll see~)

A/n: So I happened to come across those Chad skits from SNL (yeah, I know I'm late to the party) and I was also thinking of how Eris met the reader. So this is kind of a prequel to Weasel In, I guess? I highly suggest reading Part 1 before this, but do as you like. Enjoy~

Masterlist | Part 0 (you're here!), Part 1, Part 2

There were many times in your life when you almost regretted taking this 9-to-5 customer service job.

Briiing! Briiing! Tch.

“Hello~ This is Lychee speaking~” you sing into the phone. “How may I sweeten up your day today? Or is there something on your mind today that you'd like to share with me, my dear?” 

Shlick. Shlick. Shlick.

You hear a growling male voice on the line groan, “Oh god, keep talking–”

You immediately hang up.

Briiing! Briiing! Tch.

Professionalism, be damned. Yeah no. You definitely regret taking this job. How did you even get this job anyway? Well, however you got it, unfortunately, it just pays too well for you to just up and quit now.

“Hello~ This is Lychee speaking~ How may I sweeten up your day today? Or is there something on your mind today that you'd like to share with me, my dear?”

Then again, being an anonymous voice on the other side of the line is far better than your last job, where you had to wait tables for the mafioso in a very, very scandalously short waitress outfit. You were quite popular because of your unintentional moe gap where you would say some of the cringiest lines in history in a cutesy voice while wearing the stiffest expression. It wasn’t on purpose, the facial muscles on your face just don’t work the way most people’s do.

There are times you think about staff, especially Remy,  the most buffest and nicest chef you have ever met. As much as you wanted to stay with them at the time, you were sure that sooner or later you'd be kidnapped by one of those criminals if you continued to work there.

…..

Well, you technically did get kidnapped, which proved your point. That’s a story for another time.

Back to the point, when you left that job, left everyone and everything behind, you made sure you left without a single trace. You had to. The slightest crumb left behind could have created a scent trail all the way back to you, and you would have been left with only one way out…

You shake your head and body, ridding yourself of those kinds of thoughts. It’s time to re-focus on maintaining your character for your next caller.

Briiing! Briiing! Tch.

“Hiiii~ Cherry, Cherry here! How are youuuu~?”

“Salutations, this is Blueberry, sweetheart~ And you?

Although your face lacks the ability to show emotion, internally you smile at the voices of your coworkers, who must endure the same cringiness of stating their work names aloud. When else would one be able to call themselves fruit names?

… Well, you suppose Cherry would, since that is her actual name. How she hasn’t been kidnapped by any of her callers in this godforsaken city is gosh darn miracle in your book.

Your company, Fruity Friends, was created by some previously closeted man, who felt people needed someone—a complete stranger—to share intimate details of their love lives with, without the fear of being outed. Apparently, it was an idea that conjured up during his break at work when he once sat in the restroom stall and spoke to a floating voice who gave him advice to confess to his long-time highschool crush turned coworker. He found out who the voice belonged to, but lo and behold, he ended up getting married to his long-time crush, and thus, with the amount of money and influence he possessed, the company was born.

A noble endeavor, no doubt, but, in your opinion, he might've failed to account for the… inappropriate individuals who you feel should’ve gone into proper therapy instead of taking advantage of a nice-sounding voice. Seriously, the lengths these hooligans go through just to harass other people… Then again, these are often the very people who pay your bills, so who are you to complain?

You hang up the phone with a satisfied sigh, having finished another long call. You had given them the advice to make a list and check it twice before going ahead with their big proposal to their lover. You interlace your fingers and stretch your arms out in front of you. Time to take a—

Briiing! Briiing! Tch.

“Hello~ This is Lychee speaking~ How may I sweeten up your day today? Or is there something on your mind today that you'd like to share with me, my dear?”

“A-ah… um… h-hi there… I'm… Eris… um…”

If you weren’t a professional, you would have squealed out loud. The rowdy ones are common, but the quiet and meek ones are so adorable! Some of your most loyal clientele had started out as nervous wrecks, which means you have quite a few scripted lines to choose from. Although this one chose the most basic package, according to the call line, you always bring your best.

“Hello Eris~ What a lovely name. A pleasure to meet you! How are you?”

You hear him mumbling to himself on the line before he comes back. “Um… is this… really… uh… confidential?”

Ah… Sometimes, they turn out to be one of those perverted bastards like the one earlier. This one sounds too cute, it would be such a shame…

“Why yes, of course, my dear Eris! Everything you say here is completely safe with me. And if you don't believe me, then believe in the contract that had brought us together. There is nothing you say that can be taken as evidence! Rest assured, you are safe here with me, here at Fruity Friends.”

You hear him gasp. “O-oh…okay… Um… I-I'm… your dear Eris?”

Aww, how cute! You hope this customer becomes one of your loyal clientele. Still keeping up your cutesy persona, you answer, “Why yes. And I am your Lychee~”

“O-oh… M'kay… my Lychee…”

You pause, quickly mute the phone for a moment, and squeal to your heart’s content for just a second, before unmuting the phone.

From then on, Eris would return and call for you every single day for months, except for the weekends. Calls could only last about an hour, as per the package deal, since that was the company policy to accommodate multiple customers per day— unless they were willing to pay for the package multiple times. 

On the following Mondays, he'd call in to check up on you and pout about how much he missed you and wished you could talk to you all day every day. And you, in your persona, would reply that you wished you could talk to him all day as well.

It did occur to you how Eris somehow had the funds to completely take up your entire work time. And even stranger is how so far your manager hasn’t complained at all… Well, you’re making your rent on time so it doesn’t matter, right?

Besides, you quite enjoy your conversations with Eris. Once he became more comfortable, he started asking about all kinds of topics, ranging from philosophical takes such as:

“Which is better to eat first first? Steak or salad?”

“Depeeeends! I heard Americans usually eat salads before steaks and the French eat steak before salad. So it's up to you, really, ya know?”

“I see! … Hey, do you think graham crackers are cookies or crackers? I think they are crackers, but what does my Lychee think?”

To things that happened to him recently:

“LyCheeEeeEe!” he whines on the other side of the phone, voice clearly indicating he's been crying. “My LycheEee.”

You play along. “WhaAaaAt, my dear ErIsssSss?”

“T-there…” he sniffs. “There was-was this guy…”

“Awww, noo! What did this mean guy do, my dear Eris? Tell your Lychee.”

You start noticing recently that it seems once a week, Eris would encounter some mean dude who'd insult him and then he'd come to you for comfort. How he always ends up in such situations is beyond you.

And he's always… always does something about it a week later.

“My LycheEeeE.”

“YeeSsss, my dear Erisss?

“You know that one guy… you know the one I told you last week who I keep meeting in the subway, the one who kept saying I keep looking at him funny and kept shoving me?”

“Yeaaaah?”

“I finally ripped his eyeballs out!” he says, almost shrieking from excitement. “So he can't tell who's looking at him wrong or right anymore! Isn't that great??”

Your mouth falls open in shock, only to close it and consider the next words that should come out. Due to the confidentiality clause, unfortunately, whatever a customer says is not liable to use as evidence. Even if it means allowing… crimes like these to continue.

“That's greeaaaat!“ you answer, your throat tight. “You feel better now, don't you, my dear Eris?”

“I do, I do! Hehe~”

Such a troubling life, he has. Even if there is a person you could talk to, you'd never admit that sometimes… sometimes listening to him makes you feel better about your uneventful life, only having to worry about keeping your job, keeping a roof over your head, and keeping your belly full.

Besides, what's there to worry about? Your identity is unknown and your persona is too friendly to get on anyone's nerves.

-----

[Some time later…]

Briiing! Briiing! Tch.

“Hello~ This is Lychee speaking~ How may I sweeten up your day today? Or is there something on your mind today that you'd like to share with me, my dear?”

“LYchEeeeE! My LyCheeEee.”

Oh, his feelings got hurt again. What is it this time?” “YeeEeesss, my dear Eris? What's wrong? Tell your Lychee.”

You listen to him bawl his eyes, cooing and offer your sympathies, like a mother to a child.

“M-my best friend… he said…  he said…”

Oh, his best friend. Eris has never revealed his friend's name, but based on the description he gives you, sometimes you wonder why someone sweet and innocent— albeit a little violent— like Eris was friends with someone like that…

“Aww, no! Was he being a meanie again? What did he say?”

“He said… that I should get a life and stop talking to you.”

You feel your heart drop. “R-really? He said that?”

Ah… well. It isn't the first time a customer has left you, or rather left Lychee due to personal reasons.

Lychee is a cute person, someone who likes to hang out with their friends, who likes to party all day and all night, who likes to share the most scandalous gossip from their supposed life. Lychee is someone who wants everyone to like them and to help people get through difficult times…

But in the end, Lychee isn't a real person. Lychee couldn't leave their job to hang out with friends. Lychee couldn't attend parties and weddings. Lychee couldn't fall in love. Lychee was just a faceless voice who only spoke once you paid the price, and even then only for an hour or two out of the entire day.

You, on the other hand, couldn’t care less about all of that. Who has time to party and hang out with friends and share other people's business when you have no safety net to fall back on if you were ever to go jobless? Forget about reputation, you were already used to people making assumptions based on your stoic appearance.

That being said, it wasn't like it didn't hurt when your customers got on with their lives. It was just… inevitable, and you had long since accepted that. Perhaps, this was a sign that it was time for Lychee's Eris to move on. He's spent over thousands of dollars just to speak to you over several hours per day over a span of four months already, single handedly paying your entire rent. As a fellow human who has to work their ass off in order to live, you can't bear to become the reason he goes broke.

“Yeah… but I don't want to! I love talking to you, my Lychee! And you love talking to me too, right? So I don't see why he’s telling me to have a life. I am living! Ugh, stupid…”

You mull over all kinds of lines but in the end, you whisper, “... Maybe, he's right.”

….. 

“What?”

“Listen, Eris-”

“Your Eris. I'm your dear Eris. Right? Right?”

His voice sounds sharp and metallic… you've ‘slipped’ up a few times, and he'd always softly correct you with his usual whiny voice. Not like this.

You cough, getting back into character. “Yesss, you’re absolutely right! My dear Eris. Sorry~ LiSteeEeen. As much as I love talking to you, I think that you're spending way too much money on me! I feel flattered and all, but I’m scared you're going to go bankrupt at some point!”

Silence on the phone… until you hear him cackle loudly like you had just told him the funniest joke ever. Moments later you hear him again. “Aha… ah… Is that what you were worried about, my Lychee? Aww, you're the best~ That's why I… But don't worRrrRry~ As the eldest son in my family, I inherited everything after my parents died. Enough to last me years to the point I don’t even need to work. Money isn't an issue at all, my Lychee.”

A bitter taste on your tongue. “Bas-” You clear your throat, the curse word almost slipped from under your persona. “Bestieee, even if money isn't the issue, your mental health must be taking a toll with all those troublemakers you have to deal with a lot. Other than your best friend and of course me, your Lychee, do you ever talk to anyone else?”

“... Why should I? I only need you, don't I? Also, I'm not your ‘bestieee’, I'm your Eris.”

“R-Right, my dear Eris~ I'm just saying. One day you'll want to… you know? Hug someone, hold hands, kiss, or even just… be next to someone. In person. We both know, I can’t do that for you. Don't you want a more… authentic relationship or friendship with someone? Besides your best friend. Besides me.”

A pause. “... Is this part of your character?”

You blink. “What do you mean, my dear Eris? What character?”

“... Huh… Come to think of it… I’ve never thought about it before, but Lychee’s not your real name, right?”

Your voice gets caught in your throat. “... Ehhh? But it is! I wouldn't lie to you, my dear Eris.”

Another pause. “… This line is confidential, right?”

“Mmhm! Always have been!”

“Then what’s your real name?”

Your free hand wraps around the cloth of your pants as you hold the phone against your ear. “I… My dear Eris, I told you. It’s Lychee. Your Lychee!”

You hear him sigh, before he suddenly hangs up. You look at your phone, very confused and worried. He has never hung up on you just like that before. Did he just… leave?

After several weeks of no calls from him, you figure he finally did leave. Fortunately, there are always new callers on the line along with some really loyal customers who've been patiently waiting for you to pay them some attention. While it bothers you, at the same time, it sort of relieves you. He must be finally living his life now, instead of spending it all on you.

…..

It’s a shame though… He was such a charming fellow, so open with his emotions and sweet with his words. It was… different from your other customers. Somehow.

Once you finish your 9-5 job for the day, you bid your coworkers goodbye, drag yourself out of the office to the bus stop, wait for the bus, get on the bus, wait until your stop, get off your stop, drag yourself home, enter your home, lock your door, and collapse on your couch, still in your work uniform. Same as usual. Why your company felt it was necessary to have a uniform when your job only requires your voice is beyond you.

You close your eyes and let yourself be whisked away to dreamland… 

.

.

.

.

.

Shick shick shick shick!

You wake up at 3AM, according to a glance at your clock, to the odd sound of… whisking? You slowly sit up, get off the couch, walk to the source of the noise, and find a handsome young man standing in the kitchen, whisking away at some white fluff in a bowl.

You rub your eyes and blink several times, wondering if you’re still asleep. What the heck am I looking at?

The man stops whisking and looks at you. He smiles bashfully. “My Lychee-”

WOW! Has it really happened? You’ve finally reached the point you’ve overworked your mind and body to exhaustion! And now you’re either hallucinating things at 3AM or you’re in the middle of a nightmare! There’s only one person in the world who calls you that and there is no way in hell Eris would be in your kitchen at 3AM, covered in flour, and smiling at you like this is all normal! WOW!

You slap your cheeks with both hands. Hard.

Eris gasps, dropping the bowl of whipped cream on the counter. He grabs onto your hands and inspects your face with a worried expression. “Lychee! Are you okay? Why did you slap yourself?”

His hands feel oddly very real and your cheeks oddly hurt really bad… but there's absolutely no way Eris is actually in my home, right? Wake up wake up wake up-

“Lych–No, I should say (Y/n), right? I would call you my (Y/n), but you're already mine, so–”

Oh, heck no.

You take your hands back and head out of the kitchen, take out your phone from your pocket, and quickly tap on the screen.

Briiing. Briiing. Tch!

“Local Police Department, how may we–”

Your phone is suddenly snatched from your hand. You throw your hand out towards it, only for Eris to take several steps back and hold your phone out of reach. He looks at the phone and immediately hangs it up and tosses it somewhere on the ground. Then he moves so quickly you don't have time to react until he's wrapped you in his arms. He places his head on your shoulder, his lips tickling your neck. “(Y/n)... Don’t do that. I missed you… so, so much… ”

You can only stand there, hands awkwardly hanging there at your sides, trying to absorb the bizarreness of this situation. “W-why are you here? H-how’d you get in?”

“Never mind that, your dear Eris is here now.”

You take deep breaths. “Eris…”

“That's me~ I'm your Eris~”

“Right… Uh, could you… let me go?”

“I don’t wannaaaa.”

Your eyes look all over the place, as if looking for a camera that’ll pop out and announce that this is all just some elaborate prank. Except there are none, and this is all very real.

You clear your throat, collecting yourself. “Okay… Fine… Listen. I… I think I get why you’re here. It’s because you like Lychee, right?” you try to reason. “Well, sorry, but bad news is, I'm not anything like Lychee. Lychee is just a character.”

“I know.”

You purse your lips, and then say, “Okay… so that means you don’t know me. Me. We’re strangers! You have no reason to be here! Get off me!”

He lets go of you but slides his hands down to your arms. You’re unable to pull away. What’s with this strength?

“Eh? That’s not true!” he says. You're (Y/n). You like (favorite animal), (favorite fruit), (favorite TV show), (favorite dish), (favorite pos–)”

You begin to sweat as you listen to him list of all of your favorite items, before moving on places you’ve ordered food from, to private details, such as your age, your highschool, your address, your family home address, even your Social Security number–Who the heck is this man and how did he find these things out?

“–and that’s all I have so far. What do you think, (Y/n)?”

“Get out.”

“Nooooooooo!”

He pulls you into a hug again, as if to emphasize the point that he’s not going anymore. You try to twist and turn your way out, but you find his grasp to be extremely difficult to get out of, despite how gentle he’s being with you.

“(Y/n)... You know…” he mumbles into your shoulder, making you still. “For the last few days, I finally realized what you meant the last time we talked. It’s true. One day, I will want to be with someone. In person. Hold hands with them. Hug them. Kiss them…”

He leans into your ear and whispers, “But I have also realized that I would only want that… with you. Only you. I love you, (Y/n).”

…..

“I’m… sorry,” you stutter. “I don’t…”

“Oh, that’s okay!” He releases you and steps back again, interlocking his fingers with yours this time. A blush appears across his cheeks as he bashfully looks up at you with his head tilted down shyly. “We can start over. Today can be our Day 1?”

His fingers have incredible strength, again you’re unable to escape their gentle grip. “What? Day 1 of what?”

“Oh? You don’t know?” he says, softly swinging your hands side to side. “Day 1. Dating.”

…..

“Who says we’re dating?” you screech, wanting so badly to rip your hands away from this deranged man.

“Eh?? What do you… Ohhh! I haven't asked you properly yet, huh? Sorry, love. Will you date me?”

“No! We've just met!”

“Oh.” You can see the cogs turning in his head, before he tilts his head and giggles. “But that’s exactly why we should date. People date to get to know each other more. Silly, (Y/n). But if you need further convincing: as you can see I’m handsome, and I have money! Lots of it! You’ll never have to work a day in your life. I’ll be the best boyfriend for you.”

Tempting as that sounds, the idea of placing your life into the hands of someone else just like that? Hah! No thanks. “No.”

The cogs are turning again before he reaches another answer in his head. “Ohhh, I get it! I'm so dumb! It took me so long to realize… You haven’t realized you love me too, right? That's okay. I can wait. Hehe~”

You stare at him incredulously, speechless. What the he-

Ding!

“Oh!” He drags you back into the kitchen before letting your hands go to don your oven mitts and take out a freshly baked cake to flip it over a rack. “Ta da~! Mmm, sorry. I was hoping to decorate it before you woke up but… well, who needs frosting anyway, right?”

You place a hand against your forehead “What… why?”

His eyes widen in surprise. “Eh? Did you forget? Oh, love. It’s your birthday today. Happy birthday, (Y/n)!”

-----🔔-----

[Many, many years ago…]

“Happy birthday to you~ Happy birthday to you~ Happy birthday, dear (Y/n)~ Happy birthday to you~ Now, make a wish!”

You close your eyes, make your wish, and blow all the candles out in one go, ensuring your wish will come true as it always does every year.

You receive two presents to open. One from your Mom and one from your Dad. That’s how it always is on your birthday, or your Mom or Dad's birthdays. Just the three of you. No one else. Even now in your teens, your birthday party has only three members and there is nothing more that could make you happier.

After a fun-filled birthday, you went to sleep so peacefully that you didn't wake up the next day. Your parents decide to go grocery shopping without you, letting you rest in because it’s a Saturday.

It was a normal day. Just a normal day.

Sometime after you wake up, you hear heavy knocking at the door. Curious, you open it and find the police. They come bearing heavy news.

There was a drunk driver on the road.

Your parents didn’t make it.

Your wish didn't come true.

-----🔔-----

[Present…]

No matter how many candles you blew out, your wish didn’t come true. It didn’t the year after that. And the year after that. And the year after that. It would never, ever come true ever again, and at some point you just stopped celebrating your birthday altogether.

“(Y-Y/n)? Do you not like it? I’m s-sorry…”

Your vision turns blurry as memories flood into your mind. Your eyes fill with hot tears to the point it flows down your cheeks. For the first time in a while, your face twists in agony as you try to stop the dam from breaking in front of a stranger, but your knees give out instead.

Eris catches you and you both slowly sink to the ground. He holds your head gently against his shoulder, letting you cry out years worth of contained sorrows and to your heart's content as he pats you on the head, cooing at you and offering you words of comfort. He doesn’t understand, but at least you aren’t pushing him away.

Once you run out of tears to cry, you whisper with a broken voice, “Thank you… for the cake.”

“Anytime, my love, anytime.”

“... I'm not… your love.”

“Shh, shh… Take it easy… I'm here for you…”

“Idiot… Just leave me alone…”

“M’kay.”

…..

“I said leave me alone. Why are you still here?”

“Mm… because I don't think you want me to leave you alone right now?” he offers.

You sigh, giving up completely.

…..

Grumble…

“(Y/n), before I go, would you like to eat some cake?”

“... No thanks.”

“Oh… Okay. Well, I also got a present for you too.”

“Don't want it.”

“Can't return it, I'm afraid,” he sighs. “It cost so much too…”

“... Fine. I'll take your stupid gift and eat your stupid cake.”

“Yay~”

[johanarchy]

Lately I've been having a lot of fun creating some Chaos Marine OCs and I thought I might introduce them here !

So behold ! A very unlikely friend group :

The Iron Warrior is called Cassius Merle, the Death Guard is Mychos Ankou and the Emperor's Child is named Antares Fitz.

I have a whole story for how they met, but the short version is that they all got stranded on a ruined world after the end of the 13th Black Crusade and had to team up to get away.

I have informally named them The Smelly Trio because they all stink. They bicker. They share a braincell. Together they can overcome anything.

Mychos and Antares are in a romantic relationship. No one understands how it happened, least of all the two of them. Cassius is in some kind of queerplatonic partnership with both, though he would rather die than to admit that he actually likes them.

More doodles and yapping under the cut (ft me not being fully set on what their armours look like)

"I really don't care for the Gods. Like everything, they serve a purpose, but I have never needed their help blowing walls up, and I don't see why that should change."

Cassius is the youngest, he was recruited just a few decades before the Black Crusade. As most post-Heresy Chaos Marines, he isn't his Primarch's gene-son; he comes from Imperial Fist geneseed, something he feels extremely angsty about.

He's short of height and of temper, and though he tries very hard to be the hypercompetent brain of the group, he is absolutely not suited for leadership, or for functionning outside of the rigid structure of his legion. That's not his fault, he was just never really taught critical thinking. Or proper social skills.

He likes manual labor, it makes him feel useful and lets him turn his brain off, both things he desperately needs.

"You misunderstand me. I do not wish for the end of humanity. Humanity delights me, like all species of living beings do. But to think that, just because I am part of it, that I should believe it above the laws of nature ? No, this is something that I cannot accept."

Mychos is the oldest, having actually been part of one of the first waves of Death Guards from Barbarus. He used to be, and technically still is, an apothecary, but nowadays his duty is mainly to create more and more elaborate biological weapons for his fellow Plague Marines to use.

He carries himself with the unnerving friendliness and cheerfulness that only nurglites can have, and with a sort of "gentle giant" attitude that makes many people dismiss him as slow and simple minded; but do not be deceived, this is a wisened veteran who knows the world he lives in, he's just very chill about it.

He is a big nature lover, with a soft spot for fungi, which he lets grow over his exposed bones. He tends to start little gardens in every place he stays in for more than a few weeks, something he is exceptionally skilled at. He talks to all living things in his little ecosystems, plants, fungi, insects, even bacteria, and sometimes they actually answer.

"The problem with the Imperium is that it's run by losers and prudes who have never had a single minute of fun in their lives, and they expect everyone else to be as miserable as them or die. I say fuck them. Do whatever you want. If your so-called-God has a plan, you won't live long enough to see it happen anyway."

Antares is also fairly old, being of the original Emperor's Children stock, but he joined the legion at the tail end of the Great Crusade, just before the Heresy, so to him, the influence of Slaanesh has always been an integral part of it.

As such, he became the very picture of selfish hedonism; indulging his impulses and never thinking about consequences. This makes him a pretty bad soldier, as he does not respond well to authority and struggles greatly with delayed gratification. His saving grace is his skill as a fighter, especially on difficult terrain where his satyr-like mutations offer him great mobility. He had to heavily modify his armour to accomodate his legs, but his own vanity was also very much a factor in some of the choices.

Like any good slaaneshi, he loves his drugs and sex and music, but his true passion is food. He is teaching himself to cook, to varrying degrees of success, but mostly he tends to pillage the kitchens of whatever place he is helping raid at the moment. His taste is not refined, he just chases intensity in flavour.

I have more to say but it would take entirely too long to type it all up so I will stop there for now. Thank you for your time !

[almacambiondaughterofsaleos]

Miss Heed & Stolas: Two Rich Assholes Who Became The Breakout Characters Of Their Series

They are both immature, attention seeking assholes with a rich/noble background whose love interest is in the main cast or is the main character. They tend to be very flirty and sexually provocative. Their behavior partially stems from having a lonely background with a lack of self-esteem. As a result, they try to feel their existence with other people's love while doing it at other people's expenses. They can be rather self-centered and have a tendencies to deny responsibilities for their actions. And still they have tons of adoring fans.

However, the biggest difference is Miss Heed is shown to be and treated as a bad person while the second season of the show is doing everything to make it seem Stolas is this innocent baby who deserves better. And it's also the way the narrative takes them to task for treating their love interest as well. Where Miss Heed is rightfully treated as horrible for the way she manipulates and uses Flug's feelings for her, meanwhile, Stolas is treated as the victim when Blitzo rightfully tells him he's been belittled and exploited by him. Despite Miss Heed being given pity for how she lacks self-esteem, it still remembers that she still is responsible for her horrid actions and has no excuse for it. This unlike Stolas who has to be made an angel just so we don't have to call him out for his actions and treat him as an adult.

Also biggest similarity is how immature and childish they are. Despite Miss Heed being near her late 20's and him being in his mid 30's, they act more like hormonal bratty teens when they don't get their way and can as a result be very selfish. But again while Stolas' background as a noble has given him an excuse by fans and narratives of being naive, Miss Heed thankfully is given that and again just because you were spoiled and not taught right doesn't again mean you can't be treated as an adult. And it's ironic he's given he's just a baby treatment when his own daughter is told to grow up when she is rightfully mad he cares more about satisfying his boner rather than be a parent to her. And I have a feeling if Miss Heed had a child she would be a poor parent who focuses more on using them for clicks rather than actually be a mature mother they need.

A lesser aspect I have seen on both of them is that they also have the traits of being a sexual offender. And despite what stans say yes Stolas is a sex offender due to coercing Blitzo into a sexual relationship then wanting a reward for decency when he calls it off so that he can have an actual romance with him. And I am going to be frank while I like Miss Heed more than Stol-ass, she is just as much a sexual predator. Because her perfume is basically a date rape drug and what she's done could be considered assault. She also was willing to kiss someone under the influence of her drug (even if she didn't know he broke out of it). And again it's implied she possibly was using Omega and Coyote for other purposes besides bodyguarding. Seriously, if this woman wasn't rich and the gender double standards weren't in place she would be on the sex offender list. Since it's a kid show they don't outright call her a predator, but her actions are treated as more scummier than Stolas ever were.

Overall, what makes Heed a better character is that the narrative doesn't coddle her for her horribleness while Stolas has that creator pet's creation that has made him insufferable to many people.

[jeannereames]

hello dr. reames! I've been wondering if you have some sources you can recommend on fashion and clothing in alexander's empire. greek clothing is a little easier to find, and military dress is decently enough documented, but I was wondering if you know of anything that would talk about the clothing in all the different provinces of persia and possibly cover more than nobility/royalty. image search results are a little lacking on this - many are either not described or the credibility is suspect, not to mention the influences of orientalism. do we have any legit documentation? were there any restrictions in who could wear what? how did the servants and working class dress? how different was clothing in the heart of the empire to, say, the easternmost provinces? how did persians influence dress in the greek city-states they ruled? that sort of thing.

Unfortunately, there aren't many recent books on this. Harry Thurston Peck did a lot of things in the late 1800s, and there are some others from the early 1900s, when there seemed to be a boom of interest, and not just in Greece and Rome. Textiles were a thing, but more in an "oriental exotica" way. There are also nationalist sites that sometimes elide when things started, to intentionally push back the advent of certain clothing trends. Some years back, I was told about a billboard in Tehran showing stone carvings from Persepolis of people wearing the face veil, meant to make modern veiling more palatable for women. Problem: the figures they were showing as "women" were actually MEN. Veiling in the ancient world had a different purpose (namely, the expression of power: I can see you but you can't see me). So there's that sort of thing to beware of. As well as just uncareful research. I've also spotted mention of "lemons" in Achaemenid cooking. Er, no. Citrons yes, lemons no.

Probably the best recent book for Greece is Lloyd Llewellyn-Jones's Aphrodite's Tortoise: the Veiled Women of Ancient Greece. But as the title suggests, it's almost exclusively about women. Fun fact, Lloyd was one of Oliver Stone's advisors on Alexander, at least for clothing. So most of what you see there is pretty accurate, except for whatever the hell that was Angelina Jolie wore as Olympias...because (I've been told) she refused to wear what Lloyd told her to wear. 🙄

Anyway, as you mention, military is easier to find. For others reading, I'll link to the Osprey series on military history that often includes illustrations that give some idea of clothing, but it's military specific. My other complaint is that they're a little too inclined to give the suggestion of "uniforms" in a modern sense, although maybe they've improved on that in recent years.

Harvard has a pretty good website (with long bibliography) about ancient Greek weaving, which would, of course, include a little about making clothing. And there's material on daily life--which includes clothing--in various collections of that sort. Robert Garland has a good one I use in class. But again...Greece.

The Getty has a website with pictures of Persian material from their own collection, but I saw nothing there about clothes.

For Persia...yeah, there's not a lot that I know of, alas. Again Lloyd Llewellyn-Jones might be the best name to chase, as he does both clothing and Persia. You could even email him and ask if he can recommend some material--probably going to be in article form. And it might be in German. A fair bit of good research on the ANE is in German. I just don't know what's out there on clothes, specifically. But he's probably the most likely to.

I do recall an article by Olbrycht that includes, inter alia, a discussion of what pieces of Persian royal wear Alexander adopted. But that's obviously royal, and probably not much help.

That's the best help I can offer. I'm sorry!

Perhaps other people know of reputable sources and can either reply with them or repost with them.

[aihoshiino]

Hi hello!! I adore your oshi no ko analyses and chapter reviews/thoughts! I always make it a point to, whenever a new manga chapter releases, always to read your reviews after reading the chapter =3=

I wanted to ask!

What are some of your Hoshino Ai headcanons?

I had a very silly one for quite a while ever since the DVDs were brought into the story and that is when Ai recorded them, there were times she had to stop what she was saying and walk out of frame after hearing baby Ruby crying or something like that. Just having the twins interrupt her and just turning into a wholesome, funny thing for Ai.

GOD I HAVE SO MANY AI HEADCANONS I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHERE TO START… I'm constantly playing Blobo TV with her in my brain both for RP/fanfic purposes and also just for when I'm bored at work lol so I have so many in my head… So I'll rapidfire a bunch off the top of my head!

Ai can't cook! Most of her meals are premade stuff or like, bentos bought from supermarkets, etc. She was never taught literally Anything about cooking when she was younger so she has zero instinct or starting knowledge or lbr even time to try and learn, but she commits to at least trying once Aqua and Ruby are born. She is absolutely not good at it even when she really gets her nose to the grindstone but eventually becomes passable. Ironically, she's actually better at baking then cooking, because baking recipes are WAY more precise and exact and she has an easier time when she has a set of Very Exact Step By Step Instructions to follow.

On a food note, she has really bad spice tolerance…!!! Anything hotter than like, the medium spicy Golden Curry range is so far out of her strike zone it isn't even funny. Ruby is the same (a hold over from eating mostly bland food as Sarina) but Aqua really likes spicy stuff and his tolerance is really good as a result. Unfortunately, he also doesn't really realize just how high his tolerance is - it was way worse as Gorou so he keeps underestimating how hot things are. So anytime Ai is like "hey Aqua how spicy is this" he's like "oh it's not too bad" and then Ai takes a bite and dies and it takes years before they manage to figure out the differences in their tolerance LOL

She's a little clumsy…! It's a side of her people rarely see because she's so graceful and careful as an idol, but the #1 way to tell she's comfortable with someone is that they're allowed to see her being a bit of a failgirl.

I mentioned this in another ask but I like to think she gets back into video games on her hiatus… not super deep, but she grabs a cheap secondhand GBA SP and one of those carts that's like 20 puzzle games in one or something and keeps playing it even after she goes off hiatus. Since she's so busy, it's easier for her to get into things like Tetris where your play sessions don't have to be that long and there's no story to follow… anything like an RPG would be no good. Eventually one year, Aqua and Ruby pool some money and get her a jailbroken DS or something for her birthday and even though she has a bajillion games on it, she mostly still just plays Tetris………..

She really wants to be a plant mom but her schedule means that she inevitably gets so busy she forgets to water them and they end up dying and she's depresso every time…

Appearance wise, between the twins, Aqua is actually the one who looks most like her - Ruby definitely does too but grows more into her own features as she grows up, whereas Aqua still really strongly resembles Ai even once he's all grown up.

She has a ton of those influencer ass hyperspecific trendy gadgets and appliances around the house, not because she buys them but because companies keep sending them to her in hopes of getting her to promote them and she never does LOL. If she actually gets a sponsorship deal through work then she'll do it, but even then it's mostly her just hyping something up and saying she uses it every single day when 90% of the time they just end up rotting at the bottom of her drawer. Pretty much the only thing she ends up regularly using is like, toiletries and hair care products and that's just because it saves her having to shop for them but she has absolutely zero brand loyalty.

As an adult, she copies a lot of her fashion sense from Miyako! Her style leans more girly and fresh than Miyako's does but Ai doesn't really care about clothes so she never developed a sense of fashion growing up. But she knows Miyako is a pretty stylish person and looks up to her as someone to emulate fashion from. Of course, when she's incognito or chilling at home, she still always prefers her comfy hoodies and sweaters and plain, loose clothes.

Ai likes Kana a lot! This was technically canonized in the Da Vinci interview and I felt so smug when I saw it lol. But I've always thought Ai would like Kana - she sort of vicariously enjoys her cheekiness and confidence and admires her drive and her passion and craft at such a young age. When Kana joins B-Komachi, Ai sort of recognises how much of her fire has gone out and its immediately like free daughter??? Free daughter for Hoshino Ai???? She and Mem also get along really well but because they're closer in age, the dynamic is more friendly coworkers whereas she and Kana have a more senpai/kouhai surrogate mom figure thing going on.

she's our strongest aqukana warrior btw

Aaaand finally… If Ai had ever found out about Aqua and Ruby's past lives, she would have loved and accepted them all the same. If anything, knowing just how terribly alone and starved of care they both were would have encouraged her to make sure they felt loved, safe and accepted as her kids. After all, Ai, too, is a "motherless child" as Tsukuyomi describes the twins - she'd absolutely understand.