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compressingsins · 1 year ago

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Jjk Men x chubby reader honeymoon Pt. 1

ft. Sukuna , Gojo , Nanami , Toji , and Naoya

Minors, do not read this, it’s nothing but smut. Pretty much jjk men and how their wife celebrates their wedding during their honeymoon.

Please do not copy or rewrite my works without my permission. 🫥

Sukuna - Your husband Ryomen Sukuna never seemed like the romantic type, which he wasn't. But for you, he didn't mind bringing you to this waterfall picnic, in a secluded oasis in the woodlands that was owned by a rich family. You were sitting underneath the waterfall, just taking in the gorgeous view of it, holding a glass of wine in your left hand. The view was gorgeous, a swimming hole was being filled by the waterfall, the was filled with coy fish.

Sukuna was setting up the picnic table that was big enough for the two of you, and you still couldn't believe how romantic this was. Sukuna even dressed up for you, which was also such a rare thing for him to do. You enjoyed this, though, smiling due to him finishing setting up the table, now sitting across from you. He wasn't expressing it, but you knew he was enjoying this just as much as you were.

"Thank you so much for doing this, baby. It really means a lot to me, especially after the week we've had." You two just got married a week ago, and now this celebration was going to also last a week long. You've been waiting for this moment your entire relationship with your now husband, and he'd be lying if he said he wasn't waiting for the same thing. "It's really gorgeous out here, especially the coy fish, birds, oasis, and waterfall—oh my god!"

He loved seeing you this happy, so he couldn't help himself as he reached over the table to grab your hand with your wedding band on it. That of course got your attention, romantic Sukuna, was one of the best versions he's ever displayed to you. You loved him no matter what, but this was amazing. "I never thought I'd be telling anyone that I loved them. Not on the extent to which I am loving you, ____. This day is all about us, nothing or no one will ruin it."

Your heart throbbed so much for your husband, especially after he leaned over the table to kiss your plump lips, your left hand placing the glass of wine down so you could interlace your fingers together. The kiss was full on tongue boxing, your lips meshing together as the wetness from your saliva's joining and coating the thickness of your lips. Sure enough, Sukuna needed way more of you.

Nsfw —

You found yourself bent over the picnic table, thick fingers tangled in the locks of your hair as another huge hand smacked red prints into your plump ass. "Look at your ass jiggling on my cock, ____. Fuck, you've always been so beautiful." His free hand went to your thick hips to harshly pull you against his abdomen, his cock always splitting you in two. "You don't know how majestic you fucking look right now."

You couldn't register his words, especially with the way his cock so delicious slide throughout the spongy soft and sensitive interior and your pussy. All you could hear was his deep groans and the wetness of your pussy when his dick pierced precisely against that tingly spot inside of you. Sukuna loved how your body reacted to him, especially when your body released fluids that only he could ever make your body release.

"Fuck, look at you creaming on my cock. The wine was supposed to get you drunk and groggy, but apparently my dick is even better, huh?" You were definitely drunk on his dick, but not from the wine, literally from how addicting his cock fucked your pulsing and dripping pussy just right. "You're fucking cumming for me already, ____? Come here." He chuckled, yanking you up to stand on your feet and against his chest, one arm wrapped in between your breasts, the other reaching around to place thick finger's against your throbbing clit.

This only drove him to fuck your harder, "I'm gonna cum inside this time, ____. It's our honeymoon, why not make it even more special?" Your body trembling against his only egged him to go faster and deeper, he knew you wanted the same thing. "Just a little more baby, come on. Fucking cum with me!" His rumbling voice was all it took to get you there, along with himself, his other arm securing a spot back around you so he could hold you tightly as you both released harshly against one another.

Him not pulling out was the best feeling in the world, his lips landing against the back of your neck, sinking his teeth in only to slightly pierce the flesh. Sukuna let you rest against the table, but he didn't pull out. Instead, he placed both hands on the sides of your body, leaning over the table to whisper to you, "Come on ____, you always take my dick so well. You're definitely insane, if you think we're done."

Toji - Laying in a cozy log cabin, you were currently enjoying a tv show. The smell of food engulfed your nostrils, the holes flaring up from how delightfully pleasant the smell was. Your now husband, Toji Fushiguro, was putting his cooking skills to the test for you in the kitchen of the log cabin he rented for three whole days, for the both of you to enjoy.

Knowing that Toji was married before, you didn't think that he would've popped the big question on you so suddenly one day, but you did not regret it. Him getting down on one knee and saying those four magic words, "Will you marry me?" Is always the reoccurring memory in your head. You didn't think Toji loved you that much, up until that day where he finally asked you to marry him, the most special day of your life.

"I see you're still in a good mood, ____." A deep voice spoke from the doorway of your shared room, and of course it was your husband Toji. Standing with his arms crossed over his chest, shirtless with only pajama bottoms on, he smiled handsomely at you like he always do. It was his one way of teasing you, because he knew you loved every small thing about him. Walking up to the bed you were laying upon, Toji settled himself on top of you and in between your plus thighs, his arms wrapped around your waist as he stared up lovingly at your face.

Placing your hand on his head, you smiled at Toji and said, "This is the best moment of my life, Toji. I'm glad that we were able to spend this time together." You slowly stroked Toji's black locks, staring down at his handsome before bringing your other hand to his face, slowly tracing the scar permanently imbedded on the corner of his mouth. "Besides, the food that you're cooking smells really good too. I'm taking it as the food is done?" You asked.

With a groan and shrug Toji replied with, "Hm, well yeah. But you know what tastes as good as it smells?" Your husband asked with a sly smirk, and you already knew exactly what he was mentioning, especially when his arms tightened around you. "We been here ever since 8 o'clock this morning, and now it's what-" He asked and looked to the night stand with the clock on it displayed 8:41 at night. "8 p.m. How about we enjoy a special treat, then eat together?"

Nsfw —

"I love how you shake, when you're taking my cock, baby. Look at how sexy you are—fuck!" A deep grumble erupted from Toji as he slowly but surely drilled his thick girth against your velvety walls. Your body always reacted in such a over dramatic way, every drag and pull of his cock against your walls sending a tingling sensation throughout your abdomen, as if every thrust he delivered was an orgasm in itself.

He loved putting you in missionary, so your plush body could receive stimulation in deeper areas to where you could almost instantly cum on his cock. His hand was wrapped tightly around your throat, your wind pipe struggling to get air, though you and Toji both loved it, especially since the sensation made your walls tighten impossibly harder against the thick organ that was fucking itself in and out of your deliciously fat cunt.

Toji loved this kind of love making with you, one hand around your throat, the other against the mattress you two laid upon to hold himself up and watch every part of you. His eyes trailed to watch his cock that continued sinking into your heat, his tongue sticking out from how erratic your clit looked from swelling and twitching from the way he pumped himself into you.

Your arousal coated his cock every time he pulled out, a slick white sheen decorated the black hairs at the base of his cock and made him impossibly harder. Your hand went to his wrist, getting Toji's eyes back on your face and he smiled in victory as he heard you struggling trying to speak, "Toji— fu— fuck! I— ugh— Toji!" Was all you could produce, your eyes rolling back as your walls clenched uncontrollably until he hit the back of your cunt, your pussy basically trapping him inside as it creamed harshly from the strong orgasm. "Toji—!"

Your voice reached an octave that he has never heard before, but the hard clench from your cunt instantly made him shoot thick jets of hot cum into your tight walls. His eyes sealed shut and his body twitched, though he wasn't done, his arms wrapped around you and held you close to him. "I'm glad you're a Fushiguro now, baby." Toji continued to slowly fuck into you, hearing squeals from you everytime he thrusted into you. "It's our honeymoon baby, we gotta keep this up."

Naoya - You didn't know how to describe this feeling. Absolutely terrifying, shocking, downright frightening, you didn't know. Your husband Naoya Zenin thought that facing your fears would be an appropriate experience on one of the most important day of your entire life. You were so many feet in the air, on a private jet that Naoya purchased just for you two. You enjoyed the time you two were sharing, but this jet experience turned your stomach.

He was comforting you every second though, and you didn't know that private jets had dedicated 'bedrooms' with classic King-size beds for total rest and relaxation on board and master suites. That part was very nice to know, but you still found discomfort in it. You both layed together in bed, the night being young and beautiful as he continued trying to get you to look outside the window that was above your bed.

You, however, were just clinging tightly to his shirtless chest, his arms wrapped securely around you to try and get you to calm down but it just wasn't working. "Honey, why are you so afraid? Just look at how beautiful the city looks from here, it's almost, just almost as beautiful as you are." But you weren't going for that, this was the scariest thing you've ever had to do in your life, and doing it on your honeymoon just wasn't making it better.

"Baby, come on, please?" He sighed out as you snuggled up tighter to his muscular chest, not letting him go for a second. "Look, if anything happens while we're on this jet, you know that I could save us both. No matter how high we are, you and I both will be fine, I promise." Naoya assured, his large hands rubbing soothing circles on your back. "You have nothing to fear in the presence of me, ____, and you know this. I want to enjoy this, but with you."

He sounded so sad that you couldn't help but look up at him. "But Naoya, it's just so scary." You confessed once again.

Thinking to himself, Naoya sat himself up with you following. "Listen baby. You hear that?" He asked as a brow of yours raised in question. "Does it sound like our jet is going to malfunction any second?" You could hear nothing, but the sound of the jet blades spinning on the outside. "Now look—look at that." Naoya smiled, taking your hand and slowly lifting you both up to look out the window above your bed. He settled himself behind you, his arms around your waist, and his head on your shoulder. Your breathing and body instantly calmed, "Look at how beautiful the city is from above, baby. Almost as beautiful as you." He softly spoke, his hands wandering your body as his lips planted a gentle kiss against your temple.

Nsfw —

With one big hand on the back of your head, and the other wrapped tightly around your throat, your body was puzzled together with your husbands. The slow upward thrust of his cock battered precisely against your delicate spots that had your mind racing like a track full of horses. His grip on your throat was tight, his hand holding your head still as you were forced to look at the city that he found so beautiful and adored so much.

"You're enjoying this now, aren't you ___? City looks really beautiful, right?" He was so cocky, knowing that when he made love to you, it would always be the best that you've ever had and he took pride in that. So he felt as if he could talk to you in whatever way he wanted. "What if I got you pregnant, up here right now baby? That would make the night even more beautiful."

The way your walls clenched on him only egged him on more, "Shit—you want that, don't you? I wasn't planning on pulling out, anyway." He whispered against your ear, his hot breath causing your pussy to leak around his cock, so much so trying to flood him out of your gushing hole. Biting his lip with a deep grunt, Naoya pulled you off the window and against his chest completely, "You really want me to get you pregnant, huh, ____?"

He wrapped his strong muscular arms around your body, his left hand gripping your chin and turning your head so that he could capture your lips in a heated kiss, his eyes sealed shut just as yours were to embrace the impact of this intimate moment. His balls slapped softly and gently against your clit, your juices soaking him in a delicious sheen of your juices. "I love you so much, ____." He desperately pleaded, letting his hips roll into yours in the most intimate way that had you pretty much drooling.

"Come on baby." He smiled against the side of your face, his hands sliding down your body and going to your thighs to harshly pull you against his hips and help you piston his cock faster and harder inside you. "I feel your little pussy clenching on me so tightly." With a deep moan, Naoya placed fingers against your clit to harshly draw deep circles on your wet nub. "Cum on my cock so I can get you fucking pregnant."

Nanami - Being in a five star classy hotel was the best way you could've thought of spending your honeymoon with your newlywed husband, Kento Nanami. The two of you were cuddling on the bed you shared, laughter filled the room as you watched a movie that was categorized as comedy. Everything at this moment was perfect, your husband holding your hand with your wedding band, occasionally playing with the rock inside it.

This moment was so special for you two, all this effort you two put into loving one another finally turning into a successful accomplishment. Not that anything else wasn't an accomplishment, but this was the best feeling either of you could've asked for. Nanami was in heaven, which is why he wrapped an arm around your shoulder, before placing a kiss to the side of your forehead.

"I love you so much, ____." Nanami confessed, even though he reminded you of this every single day, and every single chance he got to say this. Even with those three words and you hearing them occasionally, you adored them every single time, because he knew that you loved the reassurance. And that he loved you with every fiber in his body, he couldn't keep his emotions to himself now that you're both married and together forever.

"You don't understand how much I love you more, Kento. More than you ever could imagine." You whispered back, your soft words sending a jolt of lightening to his heart. He couldn't help how much he loved you, you were literally the best woman a man could ever ask for. His main life goal was to literally grow old with you, going through life together no matter how hard it is.

His hands wrapped around your hips, pulling you on top of him to straddle his muscular thighs. You could feel him, and judging by that look on his face, you could tell he wanted to completely forget this movie and just ravage you. But you loved how he asked when engaging these kind of moments. "Can we—indulge in each other a little more than this, ____? Only if you want to."

Nsfw —

Slowly but surely, you rode Nanami's cock so heavenly it had his eyes closed and his mouth halfway agape. Nanami had his hands stationed on your thighs, letting you ride him at your own pace, getting your own rhythm and letting you take whatever your body desired. All he could do was moan your name, the deep rumbles of his chest making your walls suction strongly on his cock.

Given his size, Nanami never minded being patient with you, he let you take control only when if you asked otherwise. "Kento—you feel sooo... sooo good, babe." The way your arms wrapped around his neck and hugged his torso caused your body to lift up on him more, shifting your hips in an angle that made his cock curve and deliciously slide across the silky surface of your tight walls. He loved moments like this, only with you.

"I love you, baby." His voice choked out. Your body was so beautiful, he loved how it felt when you pushed yourself all the way down on his thick cock. The way your body jiggled added more sensation to his body, the dopamine boost to his brain boiling sweat across his body, his thick organ leaking pre-cum and adding a tingly sweet feeling to his abdomen. He could feel himself about to burst, "____, I'm about to—"

"Please Kento—just—cum inside please, I'm cumming." Your voice broke in a way that had Nanami's sack tightening in a way its never done before. He wrapped his arms around you, grounding you against his cock to thrust up into you, assisting your body to rush the delicious taste that you both could feel on the tip of your tongue's. Your orgasms were right there, the feeling approaching faster than it ever had before. "Baby—!" You practically screamed out.

Nanami couldn't help himself, holding you against him as he lifted you with one arm and pushed you onto your back, keeping up the momentum and continuing the onslaught of his thick cock inside your sopping wet pussy. He concealed you and his moans with his delicate lips, letting his dick stir your insides in the way that instantly made you clamp down on him, your pussy making his body stutter and splatter a thick load of cum inside of you, painting your insides white like a beautiful canvas. He kept his hips moving, however, the overstimulation making your eyes water and your hands shoot up to push at his chest. "We have to keep going baby, I need you to know I love you so much."

Gojo - It was the second day of your honeymoon with your husband, Satoru Gojo, and here you were trying your hardest to get comfortable in the heat of this spa bath. How your husband was able to rent the entire spa place to yourselves for a day, you had not even the slightest clue. You were currently sitting in the water, trying your hardest to accommodate to the hot sensation of the water, but it just wasn't working.

Trying to imagine the water being cold, that didn't work, trying to imagine yourself at home in your bath tub where the temperature was just right, and bubbles popped around your body but nothing worked. Gojo told you that he just wanted to have a relaxing day with you but if you're being honest, you've never been to a spa a single day in your life. So this is all new to you, you didn't know how people could get comfortable in the heat of this water.

You were standing halfway out of the water, only half of your body in the water with your hands covering your chest. It was just so hard to get comfortable to the point where you could sit back and relax, but apparently your husband loved spas. And hearing the deep chuckle from behind you, you could also tell that he was enjoying the view of your body sticking out of the water.

"I must say, your ass looks good as hell from this angle, baby. Mind if I join you?" You didn't even have to say anything because he was already dropping his towel and for you, he always removed his blindfold, placing them both to the side. Stepping into the water without a second of hesitation, your husband sat on the edge of the water, his arms propped up on the edge as his legs spread open wide, a spot that was only reserved for you. "Come here, babe."

"Babe, how the hell am I supposed to get comfortable in this water? I mean, it's not like my bath at home."

Without hesitation, your husband grabbed you and pulled you into his lap, his arms secured tightly underneath your breast, his head on your shoulder with a small smile. "You'll get used to it, ____, I promise it's not too bad depending on how long you stay in. And if you want—" Your husband chuckled, "I know a sure fire way to make you more comfortable."

Nsfw —

Water splashed alongside the spa bath, Gojo holding your legs against his chest with one hand and his other hand having a tight grip around your throat. He loved the way your throat bobbed up and down desperately trying to get air from how tight his hood was around your neck. He let his cock slowly sink deeply into your heat, though, the impact of his hips caused your body to move harshly back and forth against the spa edge.

He looked so angelic fucking into you, his crystal blue eyes piercing daggers into your face. He loved staring at your face, watching how your facial expressions morphed into different one's with each thrust he shook through your body. "I'm so glad I rented this place just for the two of us—fuck, you look so good." His hold on your throat tightened, the rosey tint that appeared on his being one of the signs that your pussy was gripping him just right.

You loved hearing your husband moan from the tightness of your walls, and it was pretty hard to tell your soaking juices from the actual water. "Your pussy is warmer than this water babe, fuck—you don't know how much I love you." With your legs still on his shoulders, Gojo decided to fold you completely in half with his body weight, his long cock thrusting languidly into your wet walls, his hands holding your wrists flat against the surface of the spa. "You know babe, I don't think you've ever been tighter for me."

Your head lolled back against the edge of the spa bath, Gojo taking the initiative to suckle deeply onto your throat. "Satoru—everything feels so... fuck—! I love you!" That only edged him on to continue his administration's on your pussy, the slow methodical thrusting of his hips touching every sensitive spot inside your velvet walls. "Please do it this time, babe!" And that stopped him, the white haired male sitting up to look upon your face. Trying to see if you were serious or not.

"Are you serious, babe? You want it now?" Your desperate whining moan was all he needed to reel his hips back and continue his onslaught, his mouth engulfing yours to swivel his tongue around with yours. If you thought this was the right time for it, then Gojo definitely didn't mind trying. He's never done this before, but he was ready to see how it felt. "If you think now is the right time to get you pregnant, let's put a baby in you."

This work was originally written by @compressingsins , if you see anything similar, please report it to me. 🫶🏾

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munsonsmixtapes · 8 days ago

Note

Does anyone have an steddie x reader requests? Can be smutty or fluffy, I have no preference.

I DOOOOOO!!!

SMUT 🥰Reader (f) is with Steve, has been for over 5 years. Moved really fast, was all good and dandy fell inlove, live together. But reader is craving the attention of another, just to feel something new, to know she’s still wanted or attractive to others. Eddie is one of Steve’s close friends / reader broke down and explained to Steve how she feels (still loves him and only wants him but craves just something more) / Steve brings this up to Eddie asking for advice, and somehow ends up with Eddie confessing that he always was attracted to reader and it goes from there….. ? Eh? 🫠

cw: MDNI (18+) smut (p in v) voyeurism, zelophilia, choking, spanking, degradation (by both reader and Eddie) masochism, Eddie calls reader a slut and whore, perv!steve

"I don't think I understand," Eddie says as he sips on his beer. Him and Steve are sitting on his couch while a movie plays in the background.

"I know it sounds weird," Steve replies. His cheeks are flushed as he thinks about you having sex with his best friend. He doesn’t know why he’s to turned on. He’s unsure if it’s creepy or hot and feels a chill run down his spine as he thinks about it more. He doesn’t want to freak you nor Eddie out, so he’s trying to play it off like he’s uncomfortable with the whole thing.

"No, just tell me again and I think I'll get it." Eddie sets his beer on the coffee table as he turns to Steve to give him his full attention.

“Y/n...she...she wants to sleep with you." So that was what Steve had said and he wasn't just hearing things. This is the exact thing that's played out in his head more times than he can count, but he never thought it'd actually happen.

“Why would she want to do that when she has you?" That's what Steve doesn't understand. He knows that what he's into is a little vanilla, but you've never complained. In fact, you've told him that you really enjoy it on multiple occasions.

“She wants something different." Steve doesn't fully understand it himself and he's just trying to not feel offended about the whole thing.

Steve unfortunately knows about all the freaky shit Eddie is into (even if he really wishes he doesnt) and he knows that's why you're so interested in fucking him. He supposes he gets the appeal to a certain extent, but not really, though.

"Are you offering me the opptortunity to fuck her or just asking for advice?" Eddie's secretly hoping it's he first one as he's been wanting to do exactly that for so long. He wants to know if you're as much as whore as he thinks you are.

"Both...I guess?" Steve's still having a hard time wrapping his head around the whole thing so he's not exactly sure certain what he's supposed to say.

“Well, if I'm being honest, man, I've always had a crush on her," Eddie admits and he feels his cheeks heat. He wasn't planning on ever telling anyone that, fully prepared to take it all to the grave, but he supposes it's too late to take it back now.

Steve doesn't know why Eddie is telling him this as it has always been so obvious, but he can see that a huge weight has been lifted from his chest. He doesn't care, though. Eddie would never do anything about it and has been nothing but respectful about the whole thing.

If anything, Steve feels bad for the guy. He's watched the two of you with longing throughout your entire relationship and said and done nothing about his feels for you. And now Steve feels like a dick for unintentionally rubbing the whole thing in his face.

"Alright," Steve sighs. "I'm gonna offer you something I've never offered any other friend. This is a one time opportunity so if you say no, that's it, I'm not offering it again. So...choose wisely, alright?"

Eddie is actually on the edge of his seat now as he leans forward, so invested in what Steve's about to offer him even though he has a pretty good idea. Steve licks his lips then takes a deep breath then speaks again. He can't believe he's about to do this, but he feels like he owes the both of you.

And because he's such a good boyfriend and best friend, he says, "I'm offering you one fuck with my girlfriend. The only condition is that it has to be tonight and it has to be right now-"

He doesn’t know what this feeling is, but the jealousy is making him feel some type of way. He can feel his cock getting hard just by the thought of it and now it’s all making sense.

"Yes," Eddie replies before Steve's even finish his sentence.

And if Steve’s being honest, imagining watching you and Eddie getting it on is making him even more hard, to the point where he has to cover his crotch with the blanket on his couch to hide the whole mess.

"Alright, let's go then." The two men rise from the couch and head to Steve's car to head to your apartment., one buzzing with excitement while the other feels a little queasy about the whole thing.

The front door to your apartment opens and there's Steve and...Eddie? What’s he doing there? Unless…no, there’s no way. Why would Eddie be there for that? And would Steve have asked him? It was very clear that he was uncomfortable by the whole thing so you dropped it, not wanting to make him feel even worse.

The two of them move into the living room and you’re quick to turn off the tv once they stand in front of the coffee table. Whatever is going on, they mean business.

“Can we talk to you?” Steve asks and you give the duo your full attention.

“Sure,” you nod, making yourself comfortable on the couch. “What’s this about?”

“Well,” Steve, sighs then turns to Eddie. “You tell her.” Now your interest is piqued. They really have you on the edge of your seat now.

“Steve has decided that he’s going to let us…” Eddie trails off, but you know exactly what he’s getting at.

“Let us what?” You know what he’s referring to, but you need to hear him say it. You actually need to hear the words come out of his mouth.

“I’ve decided to let the two of you fuck to get it out of your systems,” Steve tells you and you can see he’s still hesitant about it. You told him that you would leave it alone, but it’s become clear that he just wants to make you happy.

“You’re going to let me fuck your best friend?” You ask with a chuckle, not quite believing what’s happening.

“Yeah,” he nods. “I-I don’t know, the jealousy…turns me on.” You can see his cheeks flush and think it’s adorable. Everything’s starting to make sense now. Now you totally understand why Steve was always asking you to flirt with guys in bars beige taking you out to his car to show you that you belong to him and only him.

“And I don’t now, I also want just want to see you guys…I think I’m coming around.”

“You are?” You ask, unsure if you believe him considering that just last night, he felt uneasy. But what you didn’t know was he was just desperately trying to hide his kinks. He was just afraid that you were going to judge him.

“I am,” he nods. “I think it’ll be hot.”

“Wow, Steve, I’ve never pegged you as a perv.” You step closer to him, pressing your lips to his briefly before pulling away. “You wanna watch me fuck your friend, hm?” All he can do is nod and you find yourself stepping closer to Eddie.

You feel your heart race with excitement as you grab onto his arms, leaning forward and capturing your lips with his. They’re soft and his kisses are rough unlike Steve’s. His tongue takes no time to slide into your mouth and you moan as it tangles with yours.

His hand moves into your hair as Steve moves closer, already turned on by the whole thing. Watching his girlfriend making out with his best friend was doing something to him.

Eddie’s lips move to your jaw and he gives it a nibble, causing you to gasp and a whimper falls from Steve’s lips.

“You like that?” Eddie asks. “Does Steve do that to you?” He does sometimes, but Steve doesn’t even care what Eddie says. He’s so close to coming and he knows he can get there if you guys just fuck already.

“Mmm,” is all you respond and then Eddie’s lips are on your neck, licking and sucking in the skin as he forms a hickey on the spot right under your ear. Your moans are getting even louder and Steve is loving hearing it be caused by someone who’s not him.

“Fuck,” you whine and Steve moans, resisting the urge to get himself off right there. “More.”

Eddie’s teeth scrape along your neck and you feel your knees buckle, but he’s quick to catch you, pulling you so close to him that you can feel his rock hard cock against you.

“God, Eddie, take her top off,” Steve whines and as you moan again, Eddie’s hands moving to the buttons as his teeth slide against your skin again. Your orgasm is approaching fast and you can feel it.

Eddie pulls on your top and it opens as a couple of the buttons fly across the room. You gasp as the suddenly movement and Eddie is quick to push it from your shoulders, pulling it from your body and letting it fall to the floor in a crumpled pile.

He then moves to your bra and unhooks it as his lips find your collarbone as the thing fall to the floor between you. He then pulls away to get a look at your tits then buries his face between them.

“They’re even more beautiful than I thought they’d be,” he mumbles against your skin as his hands fumble with the button of your jeans. You help him and together, you’re able to slide your jeans off your legs before throwing them down onto the floor next to you.

He then grabs onto your ass and pulls you close to him, giving it a squeeze as his lips find yours again.

“Give it a smack, Eddie,” Steve instructs and Eddie obeys, smacking you hard, causing a gasp to fall from your lips as you fall into him from the impact. “Again,” he says. “Harder.”

Eddie smacks you even harder and you feel your cheeks stinging, but love the feeling. It feels almost euphoric having someone do these things to you.

You slide your tongue into Eddie’s mouth and push him back towards your room as his shirt comes off. He takes off his pants as Steve retrieves a condom for you, hurrying back so he doesn’t miss anything.

As soon as Eddie’s underwear comes off, you can’t help but stare at his rock hard cock, noticing immediately how much larger it is in comparison to Steve’s. You’re now wondering how it can possibly fit inside you, but you definitely want to try. You want him to fill you. You want tears to well up in his eyes as both he and Steve tell you that you can take it.

He grabs you and pushes you down onto the bed and Steve is quick to follow, sitting on the backs of his legs as he watches Eddie get on top of you after he's put on the condom, both of you moaning loudly as he enters you. He thrusts hard and deep as he pins your hands to the bed so you can't move anywhere. You're so hot underneath him like that and now he can't even blame Steve for wanting to fuck you any chance he gets.

Your moans are so loud and hot that both men swear they could both come just by hearng them. And Steve is close, God, is he close. Eddie's thrusts get harder and faster as he slowly tries to fit all of himself inside you inch by inch. He's only halfway there and you already feel tears pricking in your eyes.

"A little more, honey," Steve tells you. "You can take it." You can take it, you know you can. It hurts and you feel like you're going to be torn in half, but there's no way you're asking him to stop. You can't.

"Yeah, listen to your boyfriend, y/n," Eddie commands. "Just a little more." You can't help but notice how much more rough he is than Steve, and how much you enjoy it. You want him to degrade you, to tell you how much of a good little slut you are. But all of that comes to a stop when Eddie's hand wraps around your throat, giving it a tight squeeze.

Your eyes bug out as you stare at him in shock. You have no idea how he knows exactly what you like, but he does. He's not afraid of potentially hurting you like Steve is. And the thing is, you like the pain. You like the way his hand chokes you, the way you feel your throat closing up and how he lets up just when you feel like you're going to pass out.

And little do you know that Steve's taking notes, paying full attention to what you like and what you don't so he knows for the next time he fucks you. And he's not even upset. He knows that you never fake it, but maybe it's time to do something new.

Once you're breathing again, his movs back to your hip, pounding into you again and again sliding the whole ting in and out as you cry on his cock, feeling it stretching you out. You finally reach your orgasm and feel yourself slipping away as you go dumb.

"That's it, baby," Steve says as he encourages you through your orgasm, pushing your hair away from your sweaty forehead. "Taking Eddie so well, honey."

Eddie's pace slows down as you're fading away and he thinks it's best to call it a night, hoping, praying that you can't walk in the morning as he pulls out of you. He gathers his clothes from the floor as you tell him over and over how good he was. And as Steve walks him to the door after he's dressed, he makes sure to let his friend know that he can do that as many times as he wants as long as Steve can watch again. Eddie agrees and flees the apartment as Steve goes to take care of his fucked out girlfriend, wondering how he got to the point where he got to the point where he got off by watching her fuck his best friend.

#stranger things #eddie munson #eddie munson x reader #eddie x y/n #eddie munson x you #eddie munson smut #eddie munson x fem!reader #steve harrington x y/n #steve harrington x fem!reader #steve harrington x you #steve harrington x reader #steddie #steddie x fem!reader #steddie x y/n #steddie x you #steddie x reader #steddie x reader smut

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peopleareaproblem · 8 months ago

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"It's the only name I can say."

So last ep, Kalina dropped this line after saying "Ragh Barkrock" again. She's really trying to get the Bad Kids to deduce who she could be referring to via Ragh. We've found out about the Spy's Tongue Curse since she last dropped Ragh's name, so it's clear that she's implying that she cannot say the names she wants to say and is dropping Ragh's name as a clue. I've been seeing a lot of theories about this line that are convinced it's implying Lydia Barkrock. I disagree: I think she is referring to Arianwen, Jace and Porter. Here's why.

First of all, and most obviously: Kalina says Lydia's full name in Sophomore Year episode 6.

Kalina: But you do have some time to talk it over because I'm gonna head out and kill Lydia Barkrock. So take care.

I don't think Brennan or the D20 Lorekeeper would have missed this. Kalina doesn't have a Spy's Tongue Curse with Lydia.

Secondly, the gang already investigated Lydia and got relevant clues from her, and Brennan did not encourage suspicion towards Lydia in any way. This repeat of the clue really feels like a "you guys didn't get it yet" type thing. Last time they assumed Lydia and that wasn't it. Try again.

Thirdly, Ragh's only real interaction with Kalina is about a single time he saw something he shouldn't have: Jace, Porter and Arianwen talking to someone invisible (Kalina) on Prom Night. I believe that if the Bad Kids just asked Ragh what Kalina could possibly have meant by "Ragh Barkrock" and "It's the only name I can say," he would absolutely bring up this fact. But they haven't!

That's why I am convinced that Arianwen, and to a lesser extent Jace and Porter, are who Kalina was referring to.

Below the cut are some bits of the trancript from Episode 4 of Sophomore Year, where Ragh reveals this to the Bad Kids.

Ragh is describing the aftermath of the fight with Kalvaxus:

Ragh: I ran into the school. And I went and I saw there was this conversation, and I was going, 'cause a lot of the teachers had been trapped in the crystals and had come out again. And I saw Jace, the sorcery teacher-- Adaine: Mm-hmm. Ragh: Talking to this woman that I didn't recognize. She was an elven woman, she was wearing sort of like black, dark robes, it looked like, they were very light. She was blonde, she had glasses. Adaine: She look like this? [points at her face] Ragh: She look like you? Adaine: Mm-hmm. Ragh: I mean, yeah. Yeah, she looked like, yeah, she looked like you. But older. She didn't look like-- Adaine: Right. Ragh: Um, you know, I mean, elves never look that old, but she looked like, you know, not a high schooler. Um. Jace and them were talking, and they were talking to somebody else who I couldn't see. I just assumed somebody was like, invisible. Um. Later, um, Jace and Porter came and talked to me--

Ragh goes on to describe Porter healing him, despite Ragh not feeling "that injured, honestly", and after that he can see Kalina despite not being able to see her moments before:

Ragh: And after that, I was like walking home, and I saw this cat woman, this tabaxi. And she came up, and told me all this stuff about my mom, and she said if I ever talked to anyone about it, she would kill my mom.

This indicates that Porter infected Ragh with the curse, on purpose. Probably to allow Kalina to threaten and manipulate him so he wouldn't tell anyone what he saw. She really doesn't want him telling anyone that he saw Arianwen there.

Ragh: She told me if I ever mentioned to anyone what I had seen about that elven woman-- Adaine: Mm-hmm. Ragh: That she would kill my mom.

They have a short conversation about wether Jace is suspect, but dismiss it. Adaine shows Ragh a photo of her mother and he confirms that it is the woman he saw.

#fhjy #fhjy spoilers #dimension 20 #dimension 20 spoilers #fantasy high #fantasy high spoilers #fantasy high junior year #fantasy high junior year spoilers #ragh barkrock #lydia barkrock #arianwen abernant #jace stardiamond #porter cliffbreaker

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mythicmanuscripts · 3 months ago

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Hiiii <3 i absolutely adore your works, I have been SEARCHING for someone who appreciates the sub!hotd boys

I saw that you recently wrote this for Jace, but I've been thinking so so hard about taking care of sub!Aemond when he's not feeling good/sick, the way he would absolutely install all of his trust into his beloved, and completely melt away in their arms! Especially if he has a stomach bug or something like that.

We know how he feels about people in his space, so he definitely doesn't want the maesters or servants near him, so all of his care is basically through his lover 😵‍💫😭

I love this idea! I also think it's very funny how much we all love torturing these characters.

There's nothing NSFW in this answer but the vibes are definitely sub!aemond and also I do make reference to what happened at the brothel when he was 13 so I'm gonna hide it behind a cut just in case.

Firstly, Aemond trust is very VERY hard to get. You are the only person he actually trusts. Sure there are some others he trusts to certain extents, but you are the only one with his full trust. A big part about why you have that level of trust is because of how you protect him and his vulnerabilities? You will never ever let anyone else see him in a vulnerable position. Plenty of people have tried to get you to reveal things about Aemond to them and of course you always tell them to get lost and then tell Aemond about it later. There are no secrets between the two of you, ever.

(And I really do mean ever, not even white lies, not even a lie that sets up a surprise for him, nothing. In fact you go out of your way to always ensure he knows what's going on with you and letting him tell you what's happening with him. It's this constant, open communication that really solidifies the relationship for Aemond. You become his safe space, and he becomes yours)

So when Aemond gets sick, his first reaction is absolutely to find you and ask for support. In fact, he probably doesn't been realise it? He just feels bad and before he knows what's going on he's wondering around the keep trying to find you.

It's because he always feels better when he's in the same space as you? He just feels so much more secure when he's with you, when he knows he has someone who is 100% on his side and have his back.

You know something is wrong the moment you spot him because he doesn't actually come to you and join the conversation you're having, instead he just stands there watching you. He looks even paler than normal. You quickly excuse yourself from the conversation and go to him.

The first thing you do is ask what's wrong and he actually doesn't answer the first time. There are too many people around and he doesn't want anyone else hearing that he's not feeling well. So you take him to your shared chambers and only then does he confess about how bad he feels. You try to convince him to call a maester, but needless to say that doesn't work.

You arent too surprised with that refusal, considering how reserved he is and how much he hates seeming weak in front of others. You're just glad he's come to you. You don't even consider calling a maester anyway. It doesn't matter how sick he is, you won't break his trust like that. He came to you for help.

You help him get undressed and then help him into a wam bath to get him feeling a little better. Only once he's in the bath do you ask if you can remove his eye patch, and part of you think he'll say no because of how clearly vulnerable he is. But he nods and asks you to do it for him. You, of course, gently taking it off him and then help him wash himself. Aemond absolutely ADORES when you wash his hair, so when you make the offer to do that he agrees immediately.

Once he's nice and clean, you help him onto the bed. The moment he's changed into more comfortable clothes he's pulling you into bed with him and turning into your arms. You let him rest against your chest and run your hands through his hair, untangling it with your fingers.

He just lays there for a while, eventually he starts shivering and you pull away to ask what's wrong. That's when you feel his forehead and realise he has a fever. Again you suggest calling a maester and again he refuses, choosing instead to dive back into your chest and cling to you as he shivers.

You wait a little while longer and ask again when you realise he's not getting any better. You then offer to call the maesters but ensure they don't touch him. That's an option he considers, and eventually he agrees. `

You go to fetch the maester on duty, and you give them a very stern talking to because allowing them into the bedroom, making them promise they won't touch Aemond.

Aemond is sitting in the bed when you return, and he immediately holds his hand out to you. You come and sit on the side of bed, taking his hand and then telling the Maester what's going on. The maester tries to say he needs to feel Aemond's forehead, but you stop him mid sentence. Aemond doesn't even need to tell the maester no, you've already stopped him. You can feel how aemond's grip on your hand relaxes when you prevent the maester from touching him.

The maester prescribes some medication and to keep a cool towel on his forehead. You administer his medication and put a damp towel over his forehead as instructed. Aemond doesn't even bother listening to what the Maester said because he knows you would have listened closely and would ensure he follows all instructions.

When aemond is sick is the only time he will actually be openly needy with you. When you try to leave the room he actually whines and begs you to come back. And he's so hostile to anyone else who tries to enter the room, because he mostly just feels so vulnerable and he can't stand the thought of others seeing him that way. You basically have to guard his door for him to be able to relax enough to actually sleep.

Oh and if he made you sick as a result, he'll look after you and lord help anyone who tries to get him to move away from your bedside.

#sub!aemond #aemond targaryen x reader #prince aemond #aemond one eye #aemond targaryen #hotd aemond #aemond x reader #house of the dragon #house of the dragon fanfiction #hotd #house of the dragon imagine

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blondwhxrewrites · 6 months ago

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Tom would have you under the Iegilimacy curse and imperio curse from the start of your relationship

He cant risk it!from the second you defy him or god forbid you argue with him,hes drawing his wand from his robes and casting the legilimacy curse at you,making you his pretty,compliant doll.But thats not enough for the mysterious sadist,as he needs full control over you.Thats why he spells you with imperio.A few weeks after you begin to date him,youre a different person.More reserved,all wayslooking at Tom if someone asks you a question,always draped around his arn but although you see to lose all personality,your grades are perfect.Because how could he let his girl have such horrid marks?you need him!

He also reads your mind.Every day.He did it since he took an interest to you,but now its useless because he basically owns you.

But its ok,he's hot!

IDGAF if wandless magic isn't canon IT IS TO ME also don't worry you guys are gonna get a lot more of Tom controlling Dearest

If there was one thing Tom Riddle knew, it was the mind—a fascinating thing that not even the best of wizards could fully understand throughout the ages. It was, in its own way, beautiful. From an early age, he knew he had a gift, and it wasn't until Hogwarts that he realized the extent of it. From the countless books he read on the subject, the ability to read one's mind came naturally to him. And it had come to be useful in his endeavors, especially when it came to you.

You—his dearest—and while Tom long since accepted he would never be capable of love, what he felt for you was close enough for him. He guessed most would say what he felt for you was obsession, a type of twisted love that consumed his whole being until there was nothing left but the thought of your, soft, fleeting touch on his skin.

"Dearest, we've talked about this," he watched in disinterest as you paced around the room, all pent up from a comment made earlier by one of your pathetic friends. Your thoughts were loud, practically screaming into his mind.

"But Tiffany has a point, Tom. You're controlling."

You paused and stared at him, thrusting out your arms and waving them dramatically to accentuate your point, to which he scoffed and rolled his eyes.

Tom rose from his chair and stalked towards you, and your instincts screamed at you to cower away from him. Putting on a brave face, you stood your ground, and tilted your head up—he was way too tall.

You were determined today, huh? Two can play at that game.

"I'm not controlling, dearest. I just don't want you to get hurt by anyone, whether it be emotional or physical. I get worried."

Your thoughts echoed throughout his mind, telling him how easily you were to believe his words. It was cute how open your mind was to his manipulation, like a lamb being unknowingly led to its slaughter. "I- I know but it gets suffocating having to deal with you whenever I want to go out."

He placed his hands on both of your shoulders, and sighed when he watched you flinch. You were always so reactant to his touch. Your voice had gotten weaker, and your gaze fell to the floor. Intimidation had always been a strong suit of his. "Now I'm going to need you to listen to me very carefully, dearest." He leaned down, and pressed a feather light kiss to the shell or your ear before whispering.

"imperio"

#reader insert #slytherin boys #harry potter #tom riddle #tom riddle x reader #tom riddle x you #tom riddle x y/n #tom riddle prompt #tom riddle blurb #tom riddle ��🐍

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weirdmageddon · 5 months ago

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ok. let's finally talk about this thing i've been wanting to go public with for ages

so i am not a fan of needing THC to help me curb the embarrassment i have in being happy talking about my real realll special interests, because perceived rejection of my interests feels like rejection of myself since i put so much of myself (my time) into them. i anticipate rejection from others because the stuff i find myself occupied with is detached, abstract, highly technical, or niche, and i'm aware of the surrounding cultural assumptions. some of them, and the level at which i am in involved in understanding them, are really specialized or esoteric, so even opening up about them is like "fuuuck im gonna be made fun of or it’s gonna be too technical that they zone out and dont understand why this is so meaningful to me" ive even posted about that feeling before.

see if i start accumulating too much self-context made in my own mind without sharing it i start to feel more and more isolated from other people around me, that they’re not seeing the full extent of what im seeing myself. i don’t share it, because i fear rejection or superficial judgments in other people’s eyes (probably because it’s happened to me and i’ve seen it happen to others). but at the same time it has to be shared with more people around me or else i feel like i have an intestinal blockage in my mind. what happens is my mental colon explodes from all the shit accumulated over time and vou get a post like this. i’m sorry for that mental image btw. anyway back the point of this post

anything where i can systematize archetypes in real, everyday situations has always been my strong suit. so when people ask me my hobbies im like ... uhhh what am i supposed to say? i analyze stuff about the world and rotate it in my mind. when carl jung wrote there are “as many archetypes as there are typical situations in life” i know exactly what he was talking about.

i’ve been toeing the line to really talk about this thing for two years, so let me tell you about socionics. if you already know what im talking about i love you. if you don’t (or even if you do, keep reading there’s probably stuff you don’t know in here), it is part abstract cybernetic model, part jungian concepts, part philosophy of information exchange. it classifies how people communicate and exchange information. it was created in eastern europe in the late 70s, developed primarily in the 80s-90s by other authors and it’s been an endlessly fascinating, elegant, and reliable tool for me.

usually people dismiss personality typology systems because the mbti became so watered down and pop-culturally saturated that people seemed to collectively take a stance of not taking anyone that genuinely cares about it seriously, or at least that’s the impression i got.

(btw — i need to go on this brief rant — i will never forgive 16personalities for being the big five rebranded and people thinking it's mbti. 16personalities gives you your big five type. they explicitly state on their website that they don’t borrow any concepts from jung. -A and -T don’t exist in the mbti and correspond directly to low and high neuroticism respectively. i figured out myself they mapped each letter dichotomy to the other four measures on the big five: extraversion (I/E), conscientiousness (P/J), agreeableness (T/F), openness to experience (S/N). which is stupid and it’s false advertising. take 16p and a big five test see for yourself how they match up. your personal mbti type can be different from its correlated big five type. the actual mbti using jungian concepts as a base is alright though. oh, and the best neo-jungian mbti stuff is by far michael pierce’d takes on it. if you actually fw that heres a carrd i created a few years ago about the cognitive function axes.)

but i always end up going to the bottom of the iceberg in anything i get really into, and i basically integrate it into my own understanding of the world around me for a while. maybe it was because i had a bad experience genuinely talking about it a few years ago from some people who made superficial judgments about it that made me sort of quiet about my interest in typology systems. i assume it’s because myers and briggs used the tool towards racist ends; it acquired negative connotations, bullshit intuition supremacy, and left the study of psychological types tainted in the united states. even if the individual’s study of the system is neutral, unbiased, out of pure curiosity as a way to classify and relate different personality structures to each other, as was the case with me. in addition to 16personalities being an invalid “mbti” test that bought their way to the front page of google, and rampant superficial information at all levels of study, finding anyone who was into it like me was basically impossible. the reason i have a preferred interpretation of jungian + mbti concepts is because i’ve tried different ones on and sensed how well they conform to reality as a way of describing phenomenon, ditching old ones that werent as clear. michael pierce’s i’ve found are the closest to what i sense jung's intentions were. (actually quite likely this is something i would attribute to being because all three of us are types LIl (and also all infj too, how about that?) brain-to-brain communication LII (carl jung) to LII (michael pierce) to LII (me)). so i felt like michael pierce kept the things that worked in real life and ditched the things that didn’t, leaving behind his elegant integration of the concepts.

anyway, i was under the assumption that anything that could be mistaken for it—which socionics often is at a glance—would be dismissed out of hand, even though it’s entirely different. plus, there’s all the context i’d need to clarify about how “it’s different from the “fun” unserious pop-psych mbti and also absurdly more technical” and what's the point in doing that if they don't respect you enough to hear you out anyway? so it just made me closed off.

they share a common ancestor though. the concepts are still based on carl jung’s book ‘psychological types’ which is why there is some shallow overlap, but the scope, structure, and application of it is different. i feel like this system is a lot more “living” and relevant to real interactions and communication between people in our everyday lives. i am always seeing specific examples of these concepts in play in real life and in characters depicted in media. it’s also been more empirically studied and successfully implemented over in eastern europe, and has gone under constant development and contribution. while since the 50s, mbti had crystalized and become stagnant with diverging interpretations to the point where it’s become basically meaningless to try to talk about because nobody can agree on concepts or semantics; there are virtually no distinctions between “schools” or “models” to differentiate interpretations — (although i have my preference for what i think are the most meaningful and reasonable one; as i said, that goes to michael pierce.) eastern (not so much western) socionics is incredibly more well put-together than mbti or kiersey for squeezing the potential from jung’s original ideas, and goes much deeper. that said, i will ALWAYS advise self-studying typlogy concepts over taking a test. the algorithm of a test can never possibly know you and your individual biases in interpreting the meaning of the words better than the knowledge you just have about yourself. if you learn the theory underlying it you will actually learn about yourself and others and it will actually mean something to you instead of a being an empty decoration for your profile.

here is a comparison chart i translated into english so you can get some idea of where these systems actually differ.

Букалов, А. (2019). On the advantages of socionics over other post-Jungian typologies. Socionics, Mentology and Personality Psychology, (6), 5–7. Retrieved from https://publishing.socionic.info/index.php/socionics/article/view/2603

for me it’s been super insightful applied to real life. it is like a toolkit for interpreting why some people just rub me the wrong way and our communication feels disjointed. or why some people pass my vibe check to enter my personal inner circle and i feel like talking with them is easier and not an uphill battle. who i feel drawn to and want to get to know better. to deconstruct why i and other people interpret information in the world the way they do, and how that explains the kind of people i end up curating in my life. it has put into words the concepts i haven’t been able to find the words for beforehand, and thus enables me to retrospectively pinpoint exactly what unconsciously makes people feel more at ease or why communication is just easier with some and why it’s harder with others, regardless of any other factors. there are other factors of course, that are the result of unique circumstances—nurture, culture, and upbringing—and i of course account for those, it’s not as pertinent to me as the framework that provides the skeletal structure regardless of those individual variations that are simply already a given for me. that was actually the whole point of its creation.

the system gives me a common language to communicate these ideas with, at least to the few people i talk to who have learned it, but i can adapt the concepts in how they relate to specific circumstances and convey it to a lay audience. i’ve been doing just that to explain why, of the people who have been made aware of the hs rarepair john-aradia, i have seen no one object to it, and instead, everyone i saw found it intriguing the more they thought about it, even when they initally thought was “so random”. and i realized, “hey wait! i know how to explain that!”, but that's in another post i've been working on.

[i was actually originally writing this post in the middle of said aradia and john analysis but i felt like there was way too much i wanted to talk about as its own thing. i figured people are going to be reading that post for john-aradia explanation, not public updates about my mind. i just didn’t want to rewrite this to account for the context because the point i made was still relevant]:

but now i’m thinking okay… i’m talking to a bunch of homestucks. why am i prostrating myself here? why am i so defensive? they’re probably creaming their pants at the idea of another symmetrically divisible system of classification to get their hands on. homestuck itself is founded upon a bunch of ideas with symmetrical divisions and classifications (divisible products of 2). aspect dichotomies, quadrants, cards, black-white, yin/yang and literally countless other abstract systems. if there is a common word to refer to these sorts of things, please let me know.

but in socionics terms, all of this sort of stuff i’m refering to would be within the domain of extraverted/black intuition (Ne) information, and classifying or positioning someone within those frameworks would be introverted/white logic (Ti). you can read more about these “elements” here. homestuck has familiarized you with notionally irreducible aspects present in everything, dual yin/yang forces permeating everything, so if you understand all of the sorts of abstract classification systems in homestuck you’re basically already 75% the way to fundamentally grasping model A socionics. it is way more structured and stable than the typologies in homestuck though. but you will perceive there to be similarities in the need for archetypal/thematic sense skills.

if you want to learn socionics, for the love of god start here. there are many weak places out there to start out with that will set you up with a faulty and loose understanding, but school of classic socionics is the best foundation to start with. i saw it emerge from the beginning when it was founded, having been part of it since late 2022.

this is an introduction to SCS, what makes it special, and and how differs from other socionics schools. i find SCS to be the most comprehensive, and i’m active within a side discord to discuss theoretical constructs related to model A. i’ve helped find the links between some concepts in model A that weren’t fully substantiated in augusta’s original works, specifically the importance of the asking/declaring reinin dichotomy, how it fits with regard to the rest of model A’s structure, how it underpins the ring of social benefit (which was missing from her writing), and how it can be used as an information element charge just like positivist/negativist can (i.e. all process types have positive asking Ne (+Ne? and all result types have negative declaring Ne (-Ne!). i’m still working on transfering my essay on that to a document.)

i know the intricacies of this system like the back of my hand but yeah i never post much about it because it’s so niche and i dont know who would even want to hear it besides people who i already know would, like in that small specialist group, but they actually been quiet lately even though i’m still active in there sharing things i realized. and i even feel alienated in most casual socionics discussion groups, especially larger ones. i need people who can match my freak about it.

because i have nowhere else to talk about it i’m starting to feel guilty yapping my friends’ ears off about it when i deconstruct everything i come across in light of this system like i’m being annoying about it. but at the same time when im doing that i am constantly reinforcing the merit of the system in successfully finding some dynamic i see in the drama of real life in connection to some idea from the model. i can immediately lock on to the core principles that are at play in any situation, validating the patterns that have been observed by others. by what measure do these people / characters / groups relate to each other, how do we define the specific “feeling” of the energy between them together? i could do a socionical analysis for anything that captures my interest.

it’s also been incredible for self-insight. i can now accurately explain my thought process.

i can change my perspective of the scope of my thinking on different levels. depending on the urgency of a situation developing around me and my respect for other people’s time, i can expand my reasoning from splitting hairs at the smallest pedantic specifics—although i prefer not to, to the most holistic global hard binary 0/1 (no/yes) judgment.

it’s fractal-like; once i know how to classify and compare the features of something to another, everything else with overlapping logical relationships instantly rises up in the same way, which of course is what leads to me having insights that reinforce the potential inherent in the things around me, because my way of thinking is isomorphic. i also experience strong animated mental imagery accompanying my conscious thoughts about these systems, minimalist shapes or lines of the barebones motion happening. i feel like my mental activity and what i actually write down is trying to capture what im seeing in my head.

i prefer to be brief, but that requires sharing contexts with someone. once i've established similar ways of talking about the same thing with someone so that we’re on the same page, our messages basically become exchanging code words with each other. all of the potential densely packed into these efficient little terms.

the effect is that i am reducing the amount of time and energy i have to spend trying to explain things to someone. i just want to communicate easily and be understood by the people i talk to so that i can enjoy my time with them. this is why i felt like such a long, clarifying, in-depth post was necessary, which would rip the bandaid off and pull it all up at once, instead of on a private, individual-to-individual level. i had to have it engraved somewhere i could just point someone to instead of repeatedly having to explain the same thing over and over cause that’s a waste of time and energy.

in fact, that revelation i had about myself just now can be explained by model A too! my own type is LIl and this type’s id block houses the information elements +Te! → +Ni?, which aushra describes as “The quality of deeds and actions and the efficient expenditure of energy in work—only performing for what is truly necessary—leads to peace of mind in the future.”

or, for example, coming at it from another angle, here is an older post i made before i was even aware of socionics. i was already talking about my experiences, patterns of thinking and self-awareness in a way that was so on the nose for a socionics analysis.

is that not the clearest example of phase 2’s sensitivity (for me it is information about sensorics)? -Fi? → -Se! superego block, anyone? and did you see how much i gave attention to the time i spend working; +Te! -> +Ni? id block? [information element descriptions here]. you could also derive the progression of the information metabolism stages in my own psyche (phase 1: Ethics -> phase 2: Sensorics -> phase 3: Logic -> phase 4: Intuition).

(from The Characteristic of SLI)

so through socionics it’s like i can find an explanation for just about everything i observe in others and myself just because i’ve extrapolated the logical relationships from that system and can isomorphically apply them to anything.

and i don't say that lightly! i'm not saying anything in this post lightly. like i have a degree in biopsychology from an honors college (ncf; yes, the liberal arts college desantis got his soulless hands on because it was “too woke"). having taken courses in statistics, research methods in psychology, and others, i know all about proper research design (and designing them myself). and of course i ended my four years there with my undergrad thesis, examining temporoparietal synchrony in autistic individuals when working alone and together, where for months on end i was doing nothing but reading and interpreting the validity of research papers. i even deconstructed poorly designed psychological constructs commonly used in autistic research in mine.

i also took personality psychology as a course during my time there. i got a birds eye view of most of the popular paradigms and still felt like i was more knowledgeable in the discourse behind some of the topics we glossed over since the course material was more of a broad comprehensive thing than an in-depth one for anything specific. in totality, all of the models i read about in relation to each other seemed so fragmented into different cuts and perspectives in trying to understand and find the patterns in people’s mental life. and yet none of the models i read about hold as as great of an everyday explanatory power as socionics does for explaining ways of thinking, people's proneness to certain tendencies, and the energetic tension that happens between certain people.

people can say otherwise that it’s pseudoscience. even though there are numerous studies built on real-world observations, the large-scale statistical data like from victor talanov. there's school of system socionics who emphasize its practice. it would be impossible to add all the evidence i can to support my claims to this post but you can see for youself - there are still countless new articles being published from different authors. regardless of that, even if it isn't accepted within the rigors of “scientific canon” i really dont give a fuck since it absolutely does indeed have explanatory and predictive power, and that’s all i care about. i’m confident in this not only through firsthand experience, the ability to frame what i know to be true about the real world within it and have it successfully describe those things, as well as talking to other people about my observations.

additionally, i see people make conclusions about interpersonal dynamics where they unknowingly repeat information that can be derived from socionics concepts.

something i noticed a LOT and ive repeatedly thought about and come to the same conclusion multiple times is that i think i naturally might "embody" the most optimal ways of interacting with other people for myself. it gives me insight into the nature of the personal relationships that i already procure in my life, but it’s not really a self-fulfilling prophecy because i dont use socionics to prescribe who i "should" be friends with. that's silly. thats a silly thing to do because people do have idiosyncracies that don't perfectly align with a system if you rigidly adhere to it, so you're bound to be set up for failure if you try to force that and you will be disappointed. it's better to let these feelings happen naturally without pretense, because that's where the observations that fuel my insight comes from.

i have a subconscious sense for who i will be able to get along with in the long term almost instantly without the need for any kind of system, just based on their actual mannerisms and “vibes”, but that alone is not good enough for me, i want to know why. socionics just gives me tools to figure out why so that i know what im dealing with and its not just ineffable energies, but i can put a name to those energies to think and talk about it and compare and discover patterns in what ive curated in my inner circle over my life, what i feel drawn towards. and indeed i do find plentiful amounts of recurring patterns. the simplification and abstraction is not to destroy the soul and expression of individuals but to wrap my head around them and understand them deeper in relation to everything else, including myself.

i am aware it can be confusing for many people which turns them away. but if theres any questions you have or youre confused about any concepts i can answer them

but yeah um, i’ve really only scratched the surface of this cognitive cybernetic tool. if you are genuinely interested in what i have to say and want me to talk more about it please openly tell me since i’m not a mind reader! i assume disinterest by default.

anyway if you got to this point thanks for reading. i wanted to just put it out there for context about any posts i make in the future. just stating my honest thoughts and whats been occupying my mind for the past two years.

be on the lookout for the john and aradia analysis soon where i’ll use it in practice to deconstruct some things about those characters. and if you’re coming to this post from that analysis after ive posted it, i’m sorry this post is so long in the middle of an already long-ish post. i just thought the context was important.

#mine #socionics #model A

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foreverisntenough · 2 months ago

Text

I know this is kind of a silly concept to jump thisss far ahead but it felt cute to me 🥹 Going far into the future of the You’re Mine*, Ours*, and The Epilogue world!

--------- My tiny one shot below for you 🤍

'15 Again' - 4.1k words |

↳ A boy invites Teddy, now 15, to go to the cinema. Y/N reassures her it will go well but both you and she are nervous about how Trent will act.

Other ForeverIsntEnough One Shots

---------

“Mummy, please just don’t let him make it a big deal. It’s one thing if he wants to drive us but if he’s gonna go all ‘dad mode’ I just won’t go.” Teddy complained with a devastatingly cute pout that she’d carried since she was born.

“Baby, he is your dad. If there’s one thing he’s going to do, he’s going to ‘dad.’” You sympathetically smiled at her. Teddy had been talking to a guy. It was very evident there was a crush in full bloom. He was cute, reminded you a little of Trent to be honest when she showed you a photo. You weren't totally sure of the extent of it but she’d been filling you in here and there but keeping it fairly sparse the second Trent came round. She of course told Trent but it took a lot of encouragement for her to muster up the courage to ask him if she could go see a movie with the boy. She covered by saying it was a group of her friends all hanging out, that was true, but the only reason Teddy took any interest and felt the need to ask was because the boy invited her. You had told Trent this one night in bed.

“T… I know it’s not your favorite thing in the world but she was excited and I want her to feel confident going. I don’t want her to not tell us things.” You cooed lying on his bare chest dragging your nails mindlessly over his warm skin.

“I know you’re right. That’s the last thing I want with our kids.” Trent sighed. “I’ll do whatever you want me to do baby but who the fuck is this kid?” Trent asked, shuffling to sit up in your bed pulling you with him. “Why’s he inviting her anywhere?” He asked you naively.

“T… she’s stunning. It’s not exactly shocking a boy is interested. Remember when you used to bring her to training and everyone’s little boys just used to flock. I hate to tell you this, it’s only getting worse.” You giggled. Teddy from day dot just drew people in with her looks. Yes, you would argue her personality and heart were her best attributes but she was gorgeous and from the age of probably about four on, boys around her age took note.

“Yeah, but I was there to tell them to get the fuck away from my baby.” Trent told you with a stern face. He definitely never told a teammate’s five year old son to 'fuck off' but he thought it anytime a boy came near Teddy. “I made her. I know that she’s beautiful. She’s perfect but baby, she’s smart and she’s funny and she doesn’t need him.” Trent subconsciously pouted.

“No, you’re right, she doesn’t need anyone but she likes to have friends, T. It's nice to be liked.” You gently cooed, running your hands over his soft warm skin in consolation.

“Do they have to be lads?” He held his pout but shifted his gaze to look down at you with signature pooling puppy dog eyes.

“Look, if anything, you know from first hand experience it’s possible to truly love and care and support a girl, hmm?” You smiled before craning your neck up to Trent for a kiss.

“I kn…. She’s just my baby.” Trent sighed hating that you had a point but he was sure there was no way a boy Teddy’s age could love someone the way he loved you and there was no way they deserved Teddy, full stop.

“She’s fifteen.” You frowned at him. An ache rifled through your own heart realizing your baby girl was so grown. Teddy was two years old forever. That was Trent’s baby, she was spoiled but he expected the world from her, and boys weren’t allowed to exist. That’s how he liked her life to be.

“Teddy bear just take it as a win, hmm?” You cooed as you made food for Teddy, her friend, Sophie, Tate, and Theo. The agreed upon plan was that Teddy could go to the film as long as Trent dropped them off at the cinema to meet their friends.

“People love dad.” Theo added stealing a strawberry off your cutting board before popping over to your kitchen table to take a seat next to his younger brother.

“Dad’s the coolest, Ted.” Tate added. His smile incredibly innocent, sweet and identical to Trent’s. Your youngest baby, now ten, which was a big deal to him, just had this purity about him that made you want to just squish him.

“He’s pretty cool, huh?” You cooed gently, walking over to kiss Tate’s hair as you put down a plate for him and one for Teddy’s friend, Sophie. He hummed, turning to hug your waist as you swatted at Theo who was reaching to steal some of his food. You had made him a plate you just needed to go grab it, if he could wait.

“I know people love dad, that's the problem.” Teddy sighed. Teddy adored Trent, of course she did. You had yet to hit a year where she hadn’t but add a teen crush into the mix and things seemed to go a bit hairy.

“It’ll be fine, seriously.” Sophie tried to reassure her. She wasn’t nearly as nervous as Teddy was but her dad also wasn’t the one driving them.

“Mum…” Teddy whined looking for some sort of reprieve. Some saving grace as if you could miraculously change Trent’s mind.

“Baby… if you’re that worried about it just talk to him. You know you can, no?” You smiled bringing over the remaining plates for Teddy and Theo.

“I know but what am I supposed to say?” She groaned, dropping her head into her hands.

“That you have a fat crush.” Theo teased her with a cheeky laugh. He reached over prodding at her side.

“Tio!” Teddy complained. Her nickname for Theo had stuck. The ‘h’ in Theo’s name had never really made an appearance in your house. Your oldest boy raised his hands claiming his innocence. Childish giggles escaped from Tate. For context, your fourth baby Tyde was out at a friend’s house but despite missing one, your house was constantly filled with laughter. Trent had taken Tyde this morning on his way to training which he was supposed to be home from soon to take Teddy and Sophie. It was busy but it was what you’d always wanted.

“Hi babyyy! I missed you, T.” You sang with a big smile seeing Trent come into the kitchen on time after training.

“C’mere, beautiful.” Trent cooed, pulling you by your waist into his embrace. He kissed you in a way that was sexy but stern before he kissed the tip of your nose. “You missed me?” He flashed you the most gorgeous smile that still managed to fill your stomach with butterflies. You bit your lip and nodded completely smitten as if you two were fifteen years old. Teddy’s friend's eyes widened and a cheeky smile grew on her face as she watched you two in awe of the chemistry that was old hat to your three kids who sat unphased at the table.

“Can you guys like not… I have a friend over.” Teddy quipped feigning a dramatic grossed out face.

“Dad’s just a simp! Good for mum. Just let them live their life.” Theo laughed, taking a jab at Trent. Teddy tossed a less than impressed ‘ew’ comment at him.

“Sorry baby bear. I love mummy and that's not changing anytime.” Trent told her as he swayed you back and forth in his arms. He stood behind you resting his chin down upon your shoulder.

“Y/N... how did you guys meet?” Sophie asked you, putting her elbows on the table and her face in her hands looking on with great fascination.

“Oh… erm… We met in Manhattan where I was living at the time. He was on holiday and we just clicked. Then I gave up my whole life just to make all these beautiful new ones though so don’t forget that. Miss. ‘Can you not.’” You kissed Teddy’s cheek, pinching at her waist teasingly for her cheeky complaint moments ago.

“Honestly… stand up, mum. You’re so embarrassing for him. He was a professional footie player, it’s not like you were making a big sacrifice.” Teddy quipped with some bite you weren’t loving that she was developing lately but she was a teenager. It ebbed and flowed. She knew her place and the respect you expected at the end of the day.

“Boo hoo trading my penthouse for my mansion.” Theo piled on with a tease. “I’m kidding, I’m kidding. I love you mum.” He rectified immediately, holding his hands back up in innocence knowing a reprimand from his dad was forthcoming. Trent shot him a glare. Trent would take crap banter from your boys but you weren’t really on the table. Trent wouldn’t let them.

“You know you used to get so fussy when I talked about the times I hadn’t met dad yet and here you are now switching up on me.” You cooed to Teddy recalling that since she could even speak singular words, she’d complain the second Trent wasn’t the topic.

“Yeah well… She dipped on my aunts to move here.” Teddy turned and relayed a fairly incorrect version of your past to Sophie. You cautioned her with her name. “You did! You dipped on Lauren and Winnie!” She yelped.

“Ted, you wouldn’t even exist if she didn’t move so I don’t know why you’re complaining about this.” Theo piped up in the midst of continuing to steal food off Tate's plate just to get a rise out of him.

“Okay, okay, enough. This conversation is over, thank you.” You moved to go pluck a few berries off Theo’s plate and plopped them back over onto Tate’s. “I’m happy with my decisions but I appreciate the feedback.” You smiled walking back over to Trent at the kitchen island.

“I am pretty happy with your decisions as well. Somehow look even better than you did then though, how’d you manage that, hmm?.” Trent whispered in your ear but everyone in the room could hear. You giggled. Maybe Teddy was right, you were embarrassing for him.

“Dad, don’t lie.” Teddy groaned.

“Aye.” Trent sternly cautioned her.

“Sorry. I didn’t mean that, mama. You’re gorgeous… It's honestly annoying.” Teddy sighed. She stood up to come and give you an appologetic cuddle. You welcomed her into your warm embrace.

“Yeah, Y/N you’re so fit. Like good on you. All our guy friends think you’re hot.” Sophie added. You waved her off but internally you were celebrating a fifteen year old thinking you looked good. Trent winced when he heard the phrase ‘our guy friends’ come out her mouth though.

“Bye my Teddy girl.” You gently cooed as Teddy came to say bye to you before heading out.

“Bye mama, I love you.” She softened immediately upon seeing you as her anxiety began to rise ahead of leaving the house. She felt like a little girl, and to you she always would be.

“Be brave, okay? You’re beautiful, baby.” You reminded her cupping her cheek.

“I’m kind of nervous now.” She confessed even though she didn’t have to. She knew you already knew it but it was nice to get off her chest.

“You’ll have fun. Just text me, yeah? And don’t let daddy play his music.” You smiled at her with some reassurance and a joke.

“Definitely not.” She laughed. “You really think this looks okay?” She asked you. You had let her borrow a tan Miu Miu knit cardigan of yours to wear. The white fabric highlighting her golden tanned skin.

“Perfect. Promise. My gorgeous gorgeous girl. But baby if you're nervous tell daddy, please. You know he always helps you. He has good advice.” You sympathetically smiled at her stroking your thumb over her inherited high cheek bone.

“I know, thanks mama.” She whispered, hugging you.

“Love you, baby.” You said as you fixed the necklace laying on her chest. It was the diamond band Trent gave her still on a chain from when he proposed to you. You had to get a new chain length over time but it was just the same. “Say bye to your brothers, please.” You cooed.

“Bye Tio, bye Tatey.” Teddy yelled out to them. She was met with teasing ‘good luck’ sentiments.

“Dad…” Teddy hesitantly called to Trent. Sophie had tucked to the toilet before they left, leaving only Teddy and her nerves in the foyer. Trent hummed, turning towards her. “I know it’s lame....I’m sure you wouldn’t get it... but I don’t know...you probably don’t even want to hear about tonight but I’m nervous.” Teddy mumbled, scared.

“C’mere baby.” Trent pulled her to sit on the bottom of the stairs with him while they waited for Sophie. “I will listen to you about anything, always. I get it. What makes you think I’m immune to nerves! Hmm?” He smiled at her wrapping his arm around her.

“Dad…you’re you.” She pouted, incorrectly thinking Trent never got nervous.

“Ted, I get nervous all the time. It's just all about what you do with those nerves. You think I’m not full of nerves before.. “ Teddy sighed, gearing up to hear about football. Trent caught her disappointment though. “You know what, baby? When I first took mummy on a date… god, I went in confident. I thought nothing could shake me but I saw her and mummy’s gorgeous, we know that…” Trent smiled recalling your first date.

“Yeah? How is this helping me?” Teddy raised her brow trying to think how hearing how attractive you were would help her right now.

“Listen. I barely knew her. I was terrified but those nerves helped me to understand it clearly was something that was important to me. I wanted the night to go well. And it did because that’s the other thing, Ted, if you like someone, they should put those nerves at ease overtime, sure not out the gate, it’s good to have butterflies and all that, but you should be able to relax.” Trent kissed her temple.

“What if he doesn’t relax with me… what if I’m not pretty enough? Mama is kind of a tough person to compare to.” Teddy sighed once more resting her head against his shoulder. Trent pulled her tighter to him.

“Hey. You are the most stunning girl. I’m serious. And you know it as well. Yeah?” Trent clicked the power button of his phone to light up his background. It was a photo of your family but Teddy was sat in the middle. He tapped on her figure, pointing out that she was indisputably beautiful. “When I met mummy, did you know what really made her gorgeous? Makes her gorgeous? What made me really fall in love with her? Not just a girl… her specifically?” Teddy shook her head

“She was just her. That's what sets you apart. There is no one like you, Teddy Alexander-Arnold. You are beautiful, smart, brave, funny. Baby, I’ll be the first to tell you - this lad doesn’t deserve your time but if you want someone to like you, they’ll like you for all that you are and nothing but that. I won’t have it any other way.” Trent told her sincerely.

“Thanks daddy.” Teddy cooed, hugging him.

“Not another way, alright? I’ll fucking tell him that as well.” Trent quipped with a serious face.

“Dad, please.” Teddy giggled.

“I have pull around here. That lad won’t step a foot near another footie match.” Trent laughed but both of them knew he was being serious.

“I think he’d probably hate that.” Teddy laughed, feeling a weight lift off her.

“Well then tell him if he doesn’t think you’re the most perfect girl in the whole world he can forget about going to a footie match any time soon… and he’s an idiot. My most perfect girl in the whole world.” Trent cooed. Their identical dimples sunk further into their smiling cheeks. “You and mummy, you know? Little bit of a tie for me.” Trent grinned at her, squeezing her side.

“There it is.” Teddy giggled. “Tio’s right, you are a simp.” She said standing up, Trent following. .

“Gimme a cuddle, baby bear.” Trent cooed pulling her into him once more.

“I just want to meet the lads. Relax!” Trent laughed a little as he drove into the car park. Trent drove Sophie and Teddy to the movie theater. Teddy happily taking care of music on the way there. As Trent's sleek black G-Wagon rolled up to the cinema, its tinted windows reflecting the streetlights, Teddy felt a mix of excitement and dread. She loved her dad more than anything, but she also knew what was about to happen. The group of boys gathered outside the cinema—all waiting for Teddy and her friend—began to mutter amongst themselves the moment the car pulled up.

"You think her dad will bring her?" one of the boys whispered, eyes wide with a mix of awe and nerves.

"I hope so, bro.” Another replied, trying to play it cool but failing miserably. Teddy glanced at her dad, hoping he might just drop her off without too much fanfare. But of course, Trent had other plans. He turned off the engine and gave her a smile that was both reassuring and mischievous.

"Dad, please no.” Teddy groaned softly, feeling a wave of embarrassment wash over her. She wasn't mortified by Trent himself—she loved him dearly—but she knew he was more than just a dad to most people.

“Nah, c’mon.” To these boys, he was a legend, a celebrity, and her personal hero. When Trent stepped out of the car, the boys straightened up, their eyes widening even more. They all tried to play it cool, but their excitement was palpable. As Trent approached, a few of them began to stammer,

“M-Mr. Alexander-Arnold, we're such huge fans—" Trent chuckled, his smile easy.

“Yeah? You know ball then but it’s just Trent, lads. No need for all that." He extended his hand, dapping each of them, but his eyes were searching for one boy in particular—the one Teddy had mentioned. When he spotted him, he motioned for the boy to step aside.

“Mate, come here a second," he said with a nod, his tone friendly but carrying an unmistakable authority. The boy, clearly nervous but trying to keep his composure, walked over to Trent. His friends watched in a mix of envy and curiosity.

"Yes, sir—I mean, Trent," he stuttered. Trent gave him a firm but kind smile, placing a hand on the boy's shoulder.

"Listen, mate," he began, his voice lowering so only the two of them could hear. “You’re not going to touch my daughter, you got that?” Trent explained very seriously.

"Of course, sir—I mean, Trent. I understand…" the boy nodded quickly, starting to loose the life in his eyes. Trent cut him off with a smile, though there was a seriousness in his eyes.

"Good to hear. But let me tell you something, and I mean this in the nicest way possible," he continued, his tone still polite but unmistakably firm. "I need you to know that that girl over there is perfect and she has me, three brothers, two uncles, and the entire England football association that will hurt you lad if you hurt her, got it? She’s perfect, yeah?.” Trent told him.

"I know sir." The boy gulped, nodding fervently. Trent patted his shoulder once more, his smile returning to its usual warmth. “Thank you for letting her come.” Trent was shocked the young boy continued talking but softened at his demeanor. It was genuine. Not fearful but secure and earnest. Definitely nervous though. “I… I.. Well, she said she’d never seen Harry Potter and I thought she’d like it. I don’t know what you think of it but I just thought you’d… like you have to see it at least once so.” The boy nervously babbled. It took all Trent had not to fall into the nerd he was to talk about those films. Teddy hadn’t even shared that she and her friends were going to see those movies rerun tonight.

“Yeah. Course. She’ll like the films. Threat still stands but I agree. She’s beautiful and protected, don't forget that.” Trent reminded him snapping back into his protective dad mode.

“I won’t. It was really nice to meet you, sir.” Trent gave him a simple head nod.

“You’ll call me or mummy, hmm?” Trent cooed, walking back to Teddy to say goodbye. Feeling a little more at ease now that he made his presence known to this boy.

“Yeah, I promise. Thank you. dad. You didn’t say anything bad right?” Teddy sheepishly asked Trent, terrified of his response.

“Teddy girl...” He gave her a cheeky grin and she pouted. “I will never not protect you, baby but I want you to have fun too, yeah? But not too much, you know?” Trent cautioned her.

“Dad!” Teddy yelped with a grossed out face, hating Trent’s insinuation.

“Ted! It’s a valid comment to make! If he tries to kiss you….” Trent tried to keep talking but Teddy cut him off with another yelp. “Just be a good girl for me, please, yeah? Maybe next time you take him to a match day instead.” Trent smiled, pulling her into a cuddle.

“Really? Teddy’s eyes opened wide. Match days were fairly Alexander- Arnold family heavy days so she was surprised.

“Yeah, consider it a step before bringing him home. I think he likes ya, baby so we’ll have to get to know him a little more.” Trent winked at her.

“I feel like Anfield would be slightly more intimidating whereas Mum and Tatey at home aren’t exactly the most threatening people.” She softly smiled trying to really weigh what Trent was offering. “Oh my god… Celly will kill him.” Teddy came to a very quick realization about the facts of brining a boy to a match.

“That’s the point, Ted. That’s the point.” Trent smiled, kissing her temple. Teddy rolled her eyes. As Trent walked back to the G-Wagon, Teddy could only cover her face with her hands, half-laughing, half-groaning in embarrassment. But deep down, she felt a swell of pride and love for her dad. Even when he was being a bit overprotective, she knew he had her best interests at heart. And seeing the boy’s awestruck expression as Trent walked away, she couldn’t help but smile— maybe this wouldn’t be so bad after all.

“It went okay?” You tentatively asked Trent getting into bed that night.

“It was fine, baby.” He laughed climbing into bed beside you. He pulled you into his embrace.

“How embarrassing were you?” You asked with a smirk knowing that the question would evoke a response.

“I genuinely was not! I’m so offended you and Teddy always make it out like I am.” He responded with a laugh feigning offense to your question. You shot him a glare knowing he had been acting a little over protective and it wasn’t all that far fetched. “Baby, Ted said she was fine. I told her she should invite the lad to a match. He said he liked football.” Trent hummed kissing your hair.

“Wow… little 180 huh?” You looked up at him surprised by him offering the invitation when just the other night Trent was furious the boy even looked in Teddy’s direction.

“Nah, I just want to sus the kid out. Seemed cool, seemed to understand that she’s perfect and that there was a high likelihood of him getting hurt if he did anything.” Trent explained with a proud smile.

“T!” You whined.

“Nah. Relax, beautiful. I just chatted with him. All her friends were excited to meet me and then I left.” Trent told you keeping his smug self satisfactory grin plastered to his face.

“Her friends seem to be quite excited by a lot of things.” You mused dropping your tone as you moved to straddle him, recalling what Sophie had shared earlier.

“Mmm you’re making me excited right now.” He cheekily hummed. “But I’ll tell you right now, if I find out which one of them said you’re hot. I’ll tell him he’s not fucking wrong but he need to shut his mouth. Get away from my wife.” Trent’s face falling from lust into seriousness and then swiftly back into a teasing smile. “You are just too beautiful, hmm?” He pulled you down tight to him, eliciting a giggle from you. “Then you go and make that gorgeous girl. Now, I have to protect both of you.” Trent explained dramatically.

“Baby.” You pouted at him before kissing his lips.

“You’re just for me.” He whispered, his lips ghosting over yours.

“Always always always.” You cooed.

⇨ Read other ForeverIsntEnough here!

#trent alexander arnold #trent alexander arnold x reader #trent alexander arnold imagines #taa x reader #footballer x y/n #footballer x reader #trent alexander arnold smut

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isa-ghost · 7 months ago

Note

Do you have any headcanons as far as Philza and BBHs' relationship? I've enjoyed thinking about that because I think it's one of the few relationships on Philza's side that's actually a bit more complicated? But also Philza saying that BBH wouldn't lie is the funniest thing ever.

Or if no headcanons about Philza and BBH specifically what about Philza, Bad, and Cellbit as a trio in charge of the order because I really loved that

OOOH this is gonna be an interesting challenge because I don't watch a lot of Bad :0!

qPhil headcanons masterlist

Obligatory they're both thousands of years old mention. There's some things they can talk about and relate on that no one else on the island can. MAYBE Foolish, but Foolish tends to just focus on the present and vibe. Phil and Bad though, in the right conditions, they could and will have deep conversations about the past and their experiences.

On that note holy fucking shit these two would be terrifying teamed up together. If the Feds ever do something harmful or permanent to the eggs, god help them when these two decide they're armed enough and hatch a plan. They'll rain hell on the entire island and then some. And every other parent will be more than willing to join them. Do Not Piss Off The Immortal Murder Dads.

Phil could tell clearly that Bad is part demon. Finding out he was part reaper was a surprise. Honestly with how much of a lil trickster Bad is, Phil is surprised he isn't part Fae or something.

Phil takes one look at how Bad goes "no idea what you're talking about, nothing happened :D" about stuff like him Literally Dying and is like [uncanny Mr Incredible] "at least I'm not that bad." Phil just (very poorly) hides things and says he's fine. He doesn't straight up deny anything happened (and couldn't convincingly act like nothing is wrong the way Bad can if he tried)

Missa is a reaper. Bad is a reaper. Phil wants to see them talk about reaper things together. Or see them both in action. He himself can also carry small conversations about it since he's learned so much through osmosis :D

Actually that's kinda why Phil feared Bad so much during Purgatory. That was him in action. And he never wants to be on an opposing side of it again.

He doesn't resent Bad for Purgatory btw he just jokes like it sometimes. Same as with Tubbo (or anyone else for that matter), he blames the Watcher for trying to destroy their friendships.

Has straight up looked Bad in the eyes like "are you aware you are raising the most terrifying egg. Are you." He genuinely thinks if Dapper wanted to, he could kill Phil in his sleep. Every time he sees Dapper, he's learned something new and insane.

Tbh Phil sometimes envies how full of whimsy Bad is. He's seen infinitely more horrors than Phil for sure, yet he always ironically seems like a little ball of sunshine despite being a literal shadow lookin demon. What The Fuck is this man's secret to staying so silly.

Phil is endlessly fascinated by the extent to which Bad can come up with more and new protections for the eggs. He thinks of stuff not even remotely on Phil's radar. See, Phil's a safety expert as a survivalist, but most of his skills involve using what's around you and your wits, because survival is largely about relying only on yourself because you rarely have any other choice. Bad on the other hand will not hesitate to seek out new tech, other people, or tinker and experiment until he discovers new ways to use anything and everything he can get his hands on. Phil admires how intuitive he is.

Also Bad is really good at making bases and Phil enjoys seeing how balanced the aesthetics and practical parts are. Bad can make something look cozy and lavish as hell while also putting like a billion farms and gadgets into it.

I wonder how a conversation about possession would go. :) Surely Bad has some insight on it as a demon?

Something about how the two of them have arguably the most horrific egg death nightmares. I don't know where to go with this but goddamn would Crows and Ghosties be feasting.

Actually wait shut up, I just realized something kinda cute. In the same way Phil can talk to birds (particularly crows ofc), Bad can talk to the dead/undead (particularly ghosts). Imagine the sillies that could come out of that. It's said that animals can see the dead, what if Phil's murder conspires with the ghosts that follow Bad around ;D

The moment Phil would use his wings if they were healed, Bad would clock that he's the Angel of Death. I'm not sure he saw Phil flying during Purgatory, but if he did, he knows. And that would lead to many interesting conversations. :)

#qsmp #qsmp philza #philza #q!philza #qsmp bbh #qsmp badboyhalo #badboyhalo #q!bbh #q!badboyhalo #qphil headcanons

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angelcakestarlet · 9 months ago

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salvatore part 3.0

richie jerimovich x reader

warnings: age gap, cheating (eventually) (guys it's for the plot i swear), drugs mentioned, swearing.

guys this part is gonna be divided into two bc it didn't fit into one post :< they've been posted at the same time, u can find part 3.5 on my acc! thanks 4 all the love cuties <3

most people would call richie an asshole, it was just his nature y'know? how he walked around with that smirk you couldn't wipe off his face, fucking with cousin, trying to 'man the ship' and take control with his abrasive voice and attitude. after you got hired at the beef though, everyone wondered to what extent of an asshole richie really was. carmy and tina were on his ass the most, gifting him a quick smack on the shoulder or upside the head whenever they caught him staring at you, eyes trailing you out the door. they knew he could be an asshole, obviously, but they wondered if he was really the type of guy to take one look at your gleaming eyes and full cheeks and not be able to help himself. everyone in the kitchen called you 'baby', there was no avoiding how obviously young you were. richie knew, of course he knew, the way you looked up at him through your long lashes. the bags under your eyes nowhere near as dark and deep as his or carmy's. you were achingly sweet, and it killed him. when you smiled at him, bidding him his daily 'good morning, richie!' he felt his teeth rot in his mouth. like he wanted to store you away in his pocket and never let anyone ruin that sparkle you held behind your eyes. yet at the same time, if it was up to him, he could be the one to do it. a reminder he felt every time he played with the ring on his left hand. god, he could ruin your life if you let him. it's not like actively wanted to, but whenever he caught a glimpse of the sun hitting your soft skin he felt something intangible. so when you came up behind the alley and sat next to him on your first day, and he saw the way your glossed lips wrapped around his cigarette he knew he couldn't help himself, he wouldn't. he saw it that day, a part of you is sick enough to want this too. from that point on, you play along. his sweet names for you, soft touches, like he wanted to guide you, teach you.

"tell baby she can't be ringing in the orders all at once, cousin!" carmy yelled over at richie through the expo. "well maybe if you picked up the pace, did the damn system the way it's meant to be done you'd get it done, cousin." richie yells back rolling his eyes, he was being stubborn about all of carmen's new 'rules'. "just tell her, asshole!". richie threw his hands up, exiting the kitchen to find you ringing in orders on the new tablet that only you can seem to figure out. he comes up beside you, gently pulling your hand off the screen. you turn, recognizing richie's strong cigarette and minty aroma. "cousin's being a little bitch so i'm just gonna need you to slow down on ringing in orders. alright, sweetheart?" he nods his head towards you. "oh shit, i'm sorry richie i forgot you guys were short staffed today! if you want i can help back there-" richie chuckles at you stumbling over your words. "no no, don't worry about it, doll. you keep your pretty little self up here-" he grabs your shoulders facing you back towards your tables, "and let me worry about what's going on back there". you let out a small laugh and agree, feeling his big hands gripping your shoulders. "keep raking in those tips, baby!" he yells back as he makes his way back into the kitchen. "yo, you told her, cousin?" carmy questions as richie walks back into the hectic kitchen. "yeah fuck off, she's doing great out there. that face brings in the big bucks man" sydney throws her head back at his words, "richie you can't be saying that! i think even the way you look at her is an HR violation." "syd, fuck off, i am HR" he responds with a cocky tone making sydney roll her eyes.

it was a few days after the day of the game, and the little show richie put on to protect you from some drunk asshole. he had laughed to himself the entire way home, imagining your 'boyfriend' picking you up that night. and every night after work as a matter of fact. how you'd go home to him and lay in bed thinking about richie. his hands, the scruff on his face, the shadow his figure casted over you when he stood behind you, the way his gaze imprinted on you, and the way his voice changed when directed towards you. richie could always clock the want in your eyes, almost like you would surrender yourself to whatever would fall from his mouth. finding out about your boyfriend just confirmed his suspicions; you were just the type of girl who's looking for someone to take good care of her.

it was the following friday night after a particularly stressful shift at the beef (when wasn't it) and tina had rounded everyone up, convincing everyone to head to the bar. "ugh, but tina i'm all sweaty" you frowned, always wanting to head out looking your best. "baby throw on a dress and some lipstick and i promise you'll look just fine, mija." she came up to you, reaching up to flatten your fly aways with her small hands. "plus who you trying to look good for anyways, richie?" she laughed but then quickly noticed your red face and paused. "what?" you asked slowly with a nervous tinge. "don't tell me you got the hots for richie, girl." she looked at you, eyebrows as crinkled as ever. after your lack of response she let out a long sig, "ay no, niña. i love that boy, i really do but he is bad news. plus baby he's too old for you, my god, and you're too pretty. no no no you stay away from him." she ranted on before you could even get a word in. "no, tina! i don't, I promise!" you exclaimed, she stared unconvinced, "plus i've got a boyfriend". "hmmm, okay, i'm watching you girl. go get ready." her tone still sounded unconvinced, just a bit more at ease knowing you're at least 'taken'. you quickly composed yourself in the dim fluorescent's of the beef's bathroom as everyone made their way to the bar. slapping on some lipstick, your hoops, and trying to manage as much of your hair as you could. "wepa!! look at you, come on let's go before everyone gets drunk by the time we get there" tina pulls you off into her car.

pt 3.5 up now!!

#carmen berzatto imagine #carmen berzatto x reader #carmy berzatto #carmy x reader #richie jerimovich #richie jerimovich imagine #richie jerimovich x reader #richie jerimovich x you #sydney adamu #the bear #the bear hulu #the bear imagine #the bear fanfiction #the bear x reader #the bear fx #sydney x carmy #syd adamu

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atxxzist · 9 months ago

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a choice to be made | c.s, c.jh

summary: between the one who came first and the one who came later, there's only one choice to be made

pairing: choi san x f!reader, choi jongho x f!reader

genre: angst, fluff, love triangle-ish?, smut, etc

word count: 11k

(ao3) if you don't like lapslock

jongho's known you for a long time.

he's known you since the fourth grade when he found you huddled in the corner with doe and scared eyes after the teacher sent all you nine years old to go find a partner for a small assignment.

watching as your much smaller hands curled together at the front, all kinds of nervous and uneasiness on you playing for him as a witness that he couldn't help but to feel extremely bad.

so quiet and reserved you were; he hadn't even realized you were in his class until the very moment.

he had politely excused himself from his friends, telling the two they were fine to partner up without him and made way toward your smaller frame, the pout on you as if you were about to give up on anyone asking until you caught him in a short staring contest.

"would you like to be my partner?" he asked, even from that age conscious of the fact he had to be gentle as to not scare you away--contented when you nodded with the lightest smile gracing your lips.

"what's your name?" he tried breaking the ice, sitting at the desk beside you that the teacher had told the kids to put together.

"y/n..." you answered, short of a whisper and so shy, you refused to look him in the eyes which made a giggle bubble out of him as you could only stare at the kind boy who saved you.

"nice to meet you, y/n. i'm jongho."

and you had surely thought that it would a one time thing; that after the task of having to name a bunch of a things based on categories with him doing 70% of the work was finished, he would never want to speak to you again.

but jongho with his determination to get to know you and become friends, never left you alone a single day in your life after the first meeting, his persistence to start small conversations or include you in everything never failing because you started coming out of your shell bit by bit.

by the time you two entered fifth grade, you were practically friends even if you wouldn't admit it at the time, jongho could see the new changes and eagerness that wasn't there before.

he saw smiles you would try to fight and laughters with attempts to hide them, sometimes even courageous enough to return snarky replies that took him by surprise in the greatest way possible.

he knew he wanted to be friends with you for a long time.

you weren't only full of surprises, but you were genuinely a good person. someone he wanted to be around despite some obvious differences as humans, nonetheless, able to be held together by similar morals and ethics that carried the relationship to high school; the starting realization that you understood and got him even more than his friends.

you became a safe space for him; a place of comfort where he never felt judged or like he had to be perfect.

he would cycle his lunch and free times between you and his friends, often than not favoring the time spent with you because you were still too shy around people who wasn't him, but mainly because he was tired of hearing his friends' teases and remarks.

comments about him having a crush on you that he would passionately deny every time, trying to persuade his friends and himself to an extent that he only saw you as a friend and no more.

even going as far as to disagree with them you looked good the day you started to put more efforts into your appearance just so he could prove a point and show you didn't have an effect on him.

unfortunately much to his dismay and failed act, he wasn't even offended his friends called him a pussy, his mind unable to rid of the statement that was only said in a lighthearted manner that if he doesn't step up his game, he's gonna be sorry for it one day if someone else comes along.

so maybe the thought scared him a little to the point he could admit he liked you; such thing never crossing his mind because he never really felt threatened, especially with how you were.

your nose always rather in a book and boys never on your mind, jongho hadn't ever heard you talk about them a day in your life that by the time college entrance exams rolled around, it was as if he was worked up and worried for nothing when four whole years went by and nothing practically changed, except his feelings for you that only solidified and grew stronger.

it wasn't that he wasn't ever gonna ask you out. he was just scared of what could go wrong and what it could mean for the friendship if you didn't return the same sentiment, the bond built with you too precious to possibly ruin at the moment.

you two talked and shared college goals and which university you both wanted to get accepted to, studying every waking moment together because it would be great if you could attend the same one.

then came the acceptance letters, your mom running with yours one morning with a teary but proud look in her eyes and screaming at the top of her lung that you had gotten into the university of your dreams.

you couldn't wait to tell jongho, mostly because you knew if you got in then he must had as well considering his marks were better than yours by a smidge, and you both spent that afternoon celebrating and excited for the new chapter of your lives.

when it was time to pack and head for the new city, you both reminiscent and talked about the small but dearly hometown you grew up in and all the people you were gonna miss, especially your guys families and jongho's friends who had different things lined up for them.

the sight of the new city and big campus mesmerized both you and jongho, the life and people so different compared to the smaller town.

unable to help but to be excited and scared as the two of you walked past groups of college students and every welcoming signs and banners on the way to the dorms, the reality finally starting to set in and making you on edge.

feeling nervous about your roommate because of the endless possibilities of who you were gonna have to spend the next few years with, having to share a living space and see each other every day, so you hoped it was someone you could at least tolerate.

but your worries were put to rest when a girl with a friendly smile greeted you, telling you she goes by chaewon and was also equally concerned her roommate was gonna be a creep, but relieved after to find you are very much normal.

jongho on the other hand, didn't have any problems befriending his older but much quieter roommate, kang yeosang, who he had to admit was one of the most striking people he had ever seen.

it wasn't just the boy's looks though that made jongho want to admire and respect him; his kindness and friendliness something that made him incredibly easy to like.

after barely settling in, the semester was approaching fast, leaving hardly any remaining time for you and jongho to talk and share class schedules before the first week started.

and in that first week, a chemistry class that is a core requirement, is where he meets san.

bumbling into the classroom out of breath almost 30 minutes in after lecture already started, jongho can't hide the amusement he gets from the male succeeding with a deep bow and charming smile toward the professor that he swear made her slightly blush before the unnamed boy starts heading jongho's way. the seat next to him one of the only two available.

"hey bro, mind if i sit here?" he asks, the chair already pulled halfway.

"you're good," he replies, the boy quick to nod and take a seat, quietly thanking jongho with a smile.

within the next few days and dragging onto the second week, jongho learns punctuality isn't san's strong suit. he's never on time or even just 5 minutes late. jongho's known to not expect him until the 15 minutes mark where he'd show up casually and the professor wouldn't even bat an eye.

"he like--talks a lot and i'm sure, probably has no idea what's going on in class more than half the time," jongho tells you of his remarkable seatmate after you passed a simple question of how things are going.

the both of you seated at a table in the corner of the library, far enough from the public's eye to gossip and chat.

"maybe he wants to become close? i think it's good to get to know a couple new people around campus," you say, looking up from the notes you were writing, because no one has even talked to you if not for class obligations other than your roommate.

"i doubt it," jongho disagrees, "if you met him, i think he'd tired you out."

because while jongho is more outgoing and willing to step out compared to you, he's still selective, choosing only from a small pool to hang and have long, winded conversations with.

but san--he seems to talk to just about anyone and everyone. the man able to start and continue a conversation like he's known the person for years, capable of just spurring words after another without it being awkward, jongho can't help but to almost admire him for it.

how, there's really just people like him walking around and having it so easy due to their charms and charisma. because though it definitely annoys him to an extent; the professor having to shush san and him twice mid-chatter, it was also the undeniable welcomeness that made him already comfortable by the fourth week.

"91 out of 100. not bad for the first exam," jongho mumbles, holding up the test he just got back; all the studying and sleeping at 3 a.m. paying off.

"fuck."

he hears the boy next to him curse the same time a look of frustration befalls his seatmate now somewhat friend.

"a 48, are you shitting me?"

and it's then that jongho finds out this is san's second time taking chemistry, already having dropped the class last semester when there was no way he was gonna pass even if he did well on the last exam.

"but you have to promise."

"okay okay, i promise i won't be annoying," san eagerly assures the younger boy after he agreed to tutor him with the exception that he's to be on his best behavior because you're gonna be there too, usually writing notes or working on assignments and they can't be distracting.

you already know what to expect that monday, jongho warning you ahead of time but you're surprised you can already hear them within earshot before even reaching the table. the first voice an unfamiliar one followed by jongho's response.

"no cause why would you accurately assume i got in due to a sport scholarship."

"because there's no way someone who doesn't even know what fucking h2o is would even get in."

"uh... hi," you awkwardly interrupt, not intending to but having no other choice but to introduce yourself.

the both of them snaps to you and immediately drop the topic--the conversation starting in the first place because jongho was appalled his friend could throw a ball but apparently not get some of the most simple questions right.

and maybe it was this exact moment where jongho's senses and alerts started going off, because seeing san freeze up at the sight of you and you getting taken aback because you didn't think san would be so handsome; it brings a queasy and sickening feeling to jongho that he can't shake off.

watching san greet you with a simple 'hi' and gaze unable to leave you, too entirely fascinated, and your own that makes him even more nervous because he can see the twinge of shyness in them caused by the older boy.

"don't mind me. you won't even notice i'm here," you say, breaking the quick silence and taking a seat.

but it isn't just the first meeting that makes jongho think san might take the slightest interest in you, because if he isn't struggling with the materials, he's either stealing glances or trying to make you laugh so he can see your pretty smile.

"this is the last time i am tutoring you stupid jocks," jongho sighs in annoyance, but his tone rather teasing and lighthearted.

san scoffs and lifts his head up and toward your direction.

"if you quit, i'll just ask the pretty girl then."

the compliment making your cheeks burn a shade of red, startled by san's bold and daring personality, but jongho has to laugh off the sight to jump in.

"don't be silly. i helped y/n pass most of her science classes in high school."

"y-yeah," you manage to say. "i'm not that good at science."

but the boy currently sending a strangely tight feeling to your chest goes on to smile that dimply one you've seen a couple times by now, seeing the deep indentations on his cheeks that you think are so cute on a grown man.

"first thing we have in common," he coos softly, your heart almost taking a leap at that, jongho only able to stare in apprehension because you don't look disgusted or creeped out by his friend's shameless behavior at all.

judging by your reaction, he's sure you like it. your fluttering eyelashes and nervous twitch because san's starting to crack you open the same way jongho did so long ago.

each passing day at the library together, jongho can see your walls slowly coming down every time the older boy will ask a question or say something just so he can talk to you.

so when san quietly passed a mention of you during class and start coming into the library even on days jongho isn't tutoring, he knows san has more in mind than just trying to pass chemistry.

and when he finally drops the bomb one day in the confidence of the hushed and peaceful corner because you haven't shown up, jongho wishes he didn't see it coming.

"i like her," san tells him, jongho sitting across and far enough to be grateful that the older boy doesn't hear how fast his heart is beating.

but san's sure of it. maybe he still doesn't know much about you yet, but he wants to. you're way too endearing, cute, and shy and he wants you to be his. he just has to make sure of one thing first because he doesn't want to be that guy.

"but if you like her too, i understand, you know? it's all good. just thought i'd ask you first."

because san thinks, with a girl and boy hanging out and becoming friends, there's just the smallest chance one of them will eventually develop feelings and he respects that if it's the case.

"me? nah. it's cool, bro. you go ahead," jongho brushes the assumption off with a blow, but he regrets it as soon as he finishes, but unable to take it back because he went into panic when it seemed like san was able to see through him.

see that he has the fattest crush on you and has liked you for a long time, but so afraid of ruining everything if it's to come out because you've never shown even the slightest possibility of feeling the same way.

he's uneasy for the rest of the day, the conversation at the library always at the back of his head and bringing upon a sense of doom and anxiety because though san makes him want to pull the boy's hair out, jongho admits that he can be really sweet and just exactly what you need.

always grateful and thanking jongho with either his kind words or money for tutoring him and improving his grade in the course. the man's not exactly book smart but he does have a heart of gold that jongho can't help but to think if you're to ever date anyone, he's glad it's gonna be san.

you were just on your way to your next class when someone pops from behind to beside you, his shoulder knocking into yours lightly and taking you by surprise, but more so when you realize who it is.

"hey," san says, a smile on his face as he looks down at you.

"hey!" you return, never having seen him outside of the library before, or next and walking with you. "you heading this way, too?"

he shakes his head.

"i came looking for you."

you can't control the way your eyes swell at the statement, feeling both flustered and weirdly flattered but honestly impressed at san's confidence and how he's able to just say things for what it is without feeling embarrassed, ever.

"oh?" you raise a brow, your steps slowing and san giggling at the confusion. "how did you know where to find me?"

"i asked jongho about your schedule," he answers, catching just how creepy and invasive it sounds a second after and attempts to save what he can. "hope that didn't came out too weird."

you chuckle, looking to the floor and shaking your head.

"not too much. i don't think so."

"okay, good."

the air's met by silent giggles from the both of you after, and a smile on your lips that san can tell you're trying to fight even with your head down and focus on the books clutched to your chest.

"so, have you checked out every place on campus, yet?" he asks, snatching the perfect chance to be with you and bring you somewhere.

you hum a low denial before replying, "not yet. the size's a bit overwhelming."

"oh i understand," he says, tone shortly switching to mischievious and cunning. "you want to?"

you shrug in response.

"well, it would be nice. get familiar with the campus and whatnot."

"if you want, i can show you. whenever you're free," he offers casually, yours and his shoulder bumping into each other along the walk and in a manner san can almost call shameless flirting from his side.

"i mean, i wouldn't want to bother you," you say lowly, voice soft, sweet and empathetic, and why san is so drawn to you. there's almost a hint of eagerness in your eyes that is held back by the shyness and proper courtesy.

"are you kidding? it would be a pleasure," he beams, volume upping and loud enough for even the passerbys to hear. "just let me know when you're free and we can arrange something."

you watch him pull his phone out of his pocket and hands it to you, both your steps halting that second.

"you may put your number down and i'll text you?"

you hesitate, not because you don't want to but because san makes you feel a certain way and now that he's inviting you to actually do something, it's as if you've been put on the spot.

but eventually, you nod and take up the offer, typing out your number and giving yourself a contact name before returning his phone.

"i'll text you." he smiles.

when friday finally arrives; you telling him that's the day you'll be available, of course you're nervous.

not only did jongho refused to come along, but this is gonna be your first time out with someone else without him; let alone another boy. and a cute and kind one at that who gave you the first real experience of butterflies in your stomach a few weeks ago.

you both meet up in the library because it's the only place you're somewhat familiar with, the boy showing up so handsome and welcoming, your palms already sweating and you feel like you're gonna make a run for it.

"hey," he greets, and you try your best to return it without all the turmoil showing itself that you have been very obviously deprived of any interactions with the opposite sex (besides jongho) for who knows how long.

but san does such a good job of settling your nerves, his willingness to answer every and any questions you have throughout the tour calming most of your doubts until you realize you were overreacting.

he stands tall next to you and you still can't believe he's taking the time out of his day to spend with you, but you feel a lot more at ease because san is incredibly easy to talk to, you can see how jongho and him came to form a bond so quickly.

before you know it, three whole hours already went by and the tour's come to an end, san having shown you everything from every department buildings down to where students usually try to pass time.

"big school, huh?" he starts, the two of you stopping right in front of the girls dorms and you nodding in response.

"pretty insane."

he snickers and you try not to stare at the dimple provoking you because if that isn't your favorite feature of him. your thought soon interrupted by his mellow voice spurring a rather questionable remark that makes you think twice.

"but that was a good first date," he says, hands in his pockets and not a single shame on his face, instead biting back a smirk.

"first date?" you repeat, your feelings a mix of nervous and surprise... not in any bad ways. you can't say you don't enjoy the flirty and coyish tone that's starting to set in, even if you have no idea how any of it works.

he smoothly recovers, "i mean, if you want it to be?" as if he wasn't the one who started it in the first place. "but you know, if you don't, i respect that."

you're silent for a quick second before confessing, "well, i-i've never been on a date before." to which you immediately want to face palm after because you're not sure why he needed to know.

once he giggles and really look you in the eyes, you feel like you're gonna have a breakdown because the entire day has really been an overload of san that's gonna make your heart explode. and now he's staring at you like he wants you.

"then it should be done properly. how about a real first date?" he tilts his head slightly, hands now out of his pockets and delivering such bold words with all the confidence and cheekiness in the world.

you can only swallow and gulp, breaking the tension with a serious, "are you asking me out?" that's the last thing in pushing san to a laughter because he might enjoy messing with you a little too much.

"i am," he says once he can look you straight in the face and not have the urge to start laughing at how cute and clueless you really are.

but in spite of his endless teasings and your uncertainty (not your feelings for him), you do eventually say yes. now that you're out of high school and is an adult, you want to push out of your comfort zone a little and actually go out and do things.

see if it's gonna work out because ever since meeting san, you've been experiencing emotions and symptoms you've never had before.

the date takes place in a small and cozy cafe down the street from the university, san having said because it's the first, it's important to get to know one another before deciding on anything grand.

you show up in simple jeans and a blouse with your hair and makeup done, and san's in a black sweater looking effortlessly just as good as he did the last time you saw him.

the conversations and atmosphere not as awkward or bumbling as one would expect a first date to be since you've already become a lot more comfortable due to previous encounters.

you two talk over breads and two cups of cappuccino, san laughing and poking fun at you again when he sees the line of microfoam on top your lip, reaching out with his hand to clean it and bringing a light blush to your cheeks in the process.

unsure how a date's supposed to go and play out exactly, but following san's leads because it just feels so right with him.

and on the way back to the dorms, he catches you by the waist when you miss a footing, time suddenly stopping when he keeps his grip there with you two staring into each other as if in a melodrama; san sealing the relationship with a kiss before the end of the night when you said yes to being his girlfriend.

still scared and inexperienced but so sure that you want it because you have a good feeling about san and how you can't wait to tell jongho the next day because you know he will be happy for you.

jongho still can't wrap his head around the fact even almost two weeks later. that you and san are dating now, and it's not that he isn't happy for you--because he respects and knows very well that it was your choice.

he just hasn't gotten used to it; the sight of san snuggling so closely by your side in the library or playing with your hair affectionately, because the truth is--he isn't used to you being with anybody else ever. especially not this intimate.

"guess what, babe," san squeals, seeing your arrival and pulling you to the seat beside him that instant, jongho can only stare as you go on to mutter a "hmm" at your boyfriend.

"i passed the second exam," he tells you so happy and excited, shoving the laptop screen in your face displaying the score of an 83 on exam 2; his antics met by an endeared giggle from you.

"congrats," you say.

he smiles in response, pushing the device away and supporting his elbow on the table to lean in and mumble, "i think that deserves a kiss." before flying in to steal a quick peck on your cheek that barely misses your lips, making you swat at him in return.

"san!"

you wouldn't be so flustered if it wasn't a public setting, with jongho blatantly sitting right across, blinking and watching the entire time.

it's almost a daily occurrence at this point, jongho toughening his heart up because he knows you're gonna get kissed or teased and it's gonna make him feel a little restless.

he thinks san is a good man, the way he treats you full of love and regard puts jongho at ease because you deserve nothing less than that. the past week and a half with him already doing you some good, small changes on the surface from being with someone as upbeat and positive as san.

you laugh and smile more, and you've gotten more confident now that there's someone to tell you how beautiful you really are every day.

jongho is happy for you. he just needs more time to process everything, especially the changes.

after all, it's not like he became friends with you in hopes of only taking the relationship further. you are still his friend first and foremost.

"he wants me to meet his friends, and i think it'd be better if you come, too? so we can all go, you know," you tell him over the phone, on the topic of a party san's gonna take you to.

"it's fine. you guys go ahead. i'm gonna work on catching up with assignments," he replies, not lying exactly but it's the first thing to come to mind that he could use.

you pause before returning a disappointed, "oh, okay. maybe next time?"

"yeah. next time."

because you do think it would be funner with your best friend next to you, you and him usually experiencing lots of first together and you wanted him to be there when you walk through the house of your first ever college party. but it's fine since san's gonna take you and he promised to be by your side the whole night.

when the party's arrival comes, just the outside already loud and overwhelming enough, san takes you by the hand intertwining his fingers with yours and guiding the way into the house. your other one slightly wrapping it around his arm because you don't want any chances of separating from your boyfriend.

the inside is stuffy and definitely reeks of alcohol, feeling yourself picking up the pace and huddling even closer to san, prompting him to suddenly stop and turn to you, his head over his shoulder.

"how you feeling?"

"alright," you answer. "just a little overwhelmed."

he reassures you with a smile, mumbling out "almost there" and pulling you just a few more steps until you can hear piercing laughters even through the booming music, followed by an array of voices.

"ha! you fucking wish it was you!"

"shut the fuck up wooyoung. i don't see you having song credits to your name at the mere age of 20."

"wow, hey guys," san breaks the banter between his friends, all three of them snapping their neck to him that second. "such classy introduction."

you can only gulp and stare at the three men in front of you, all of them just as good looking as san and a bit intimidating the way they're staring you down.

"guys, this is y/n, and y/n, these are the three musketeers," san quips, the remark swooping a tiny smile from you.

"pfft," the boy who spoke second earlier blows, his striking red hair is the first thing to catch your eye. he's the shortest among the group as if missing a centimeter the one across from him has. "cut the shit, choi."

"ah! y/n!" says the one who spoke first--wooyoung, you think, the one currently sounding the most playful and loud. "so you're the girl who gave san a hard-on in the library. we've heard a ton about you!"

it's from how tight san's grip has gotten that you know he's tense, and you're grateful for the dark lighting because you can feel the heat radiating off your cheeks from the comment.

"wooyoung! you can't just say that!" the red-haired boy reprimands, while the one in the middle as tall as a mountain and hard to miss just chuckles it all off, not a single word fallen from his lips once.

"sorry about my friend," he continues, reaching out to offer his hand for a shake. "i'm hongjoong."

"y/n," you say, amid the exchange though san's already put your name out there.

"mingi," the tall one in the middle finally speaks, his voice an unexpected deep. and then wooyoung jumping onto the train because he can't break the pattern.

"well, you are definitely a lot cuter in person though san already couldn't shut up about it," another remark leaving wooyoung once again, the only one to be spilling everything and saying it without an ounce of shame or embarrassment. and you thought san was the most shameless person you know.

"thanks," you reply, your current dilemma between the urge to laugh or keep a straight face. "he didn't mention you guys were a little loud and chaotic."

"ooh okay, i like her already," says wooyoung, a playful smirk settling on his face.

"--and embarrassing," san adding once he's finally able to pull you away from the nosy boys and to a part of the house more discreet.

they wouldn't stop asking questions or retelling you san's past relationships and how pathetic or yearning he gets once he's fallen for someone.

"sorry, babe. maybe bringing you to meet them the first party was a mistake."

you shake your head, a small giggle bubbling out.

"no, you're fine. they were interesting."

chaotic and just as extroverted as san can be, but also like him, you were quick to warm up to them. their loud personalities made it easy to join conversations and feel invited.

"want a drink?" he asks, nodding his head off the direction behind you. your back pushed against the table with the party drinks, you just noticed.

you shake your head. "maybe later."

but he goes in to grab one anyway, keeping it in his hand while staring down at you.

"try it. it'll loosen you up." he smirks, and you don't want to but san has a way of tempting you into doing things you usually wouldn't.

"is it alcohol?" you softly ask.

"yeah. beer."

"oh."

and when you still keep quiet, he starts again, "i'll go first and you after."

"well that's unfair. you've been here before," you whine, a pout crossing your lips without notice and san has to resist the urge to kiss you right there.

"no. i don't even like alcohol," he defends himself, tall and true because yes, he's been to lots of parties but he still cannot take it, his body and face turning a red flush like none others so really, he's not sure why he's so adamant in making you drink as well.

"hmm," you hum a suspicious tone, but san's already pouring the cup down his throat before you can finish, watching his eyes go round before passing it to you.

"try it."

and you do, the liquid barely touching your tongue when you can already taste the foreign citrusy and earthy flavor to the drink, your face twisting in response that makes san laugh.

"oh you love it," his teasing and sarcastic comment earning a scoff from you.

"why do people drink this stuff?" you say, the taste still lingering and passing the cup back to him.

"well, according to wooyoung: to have fun."

he's quick to pour the remains into the sink before tossing it to a nearby trashcan, his head prancing around looking for something to do.

"wanna dance?"

you follow his gaze to the dance floor, the confident and bold partygoers with their moves intimidating you a bit.

"i don't know." you look him in the eyes and his blank expression melting into a tender smile.

"come on. you're gonna have fun," he squeaks, pulling you by the wrist and to the dance floor, the strobing light hitting your eyes and making you squint.

"i don't know how to dance," you yell over the music to a slouching san attempting to hear you out, and when he does, a snicker escapes his lips before whispering into your ear.

"i'll teach you."

you don't get the chance to protest or hurl another complaint about your dancing skills (or lack thereof), san already spinning you around until your back's flushed against his chest, resting his chin on your shoulder and arms wrapped around your waist as his breath ghosts the tip of your skin.

"just move along to the beat," he whispers, the goosebumps on your neck raising because of the position. the two of you never this close and sensual before.

but you do as he say, rocking slowly together in a romantic manner to the upbeat pop song but it is nice and brings upon a certain arousal between your legs.

everything with san has been like a dream, from the way he's so perfect you can't help but to question if it's real he's really your boyfriend, to how he treats you as if you saved a planet in the last life.

he really is everything you could ask for in a partner. funny, respectful, and just so fun, there's never a dull moment.

the two of you have been spending lots of time together, whether in between passing periods or just laying around in the dorm when chaewon's out--each day riskier than the one before with san's comments and remarks more daring and uncensored.

"how can i not have a boner when you're so pretty and hot, baby."

you were just laying on his chest in his bedroom and house that he's finally brought you around to, the place big and with a richness you've never seen before, when one of your knees accidentally brushed over his crotch area and you immediately questioned the bulge growing in his pants.

you've come to embrace his rather pervertedness than to shy away, now that there isn't much to hide between you guys; sometimes getting the itch yourself but much better at keeping it together in comparison.

"well, keep it in your pants," you tell him with a playful and dismissive tone, a smirk at the corner of your lips and going back to your phone.

"can i keep it inside you instead?"

the innuendo makes you lower your phone to shove his chest lightly as you yell out his name, his heaving chest from the laughter felt on the palm of your hand.

"just kidding. whenever you're ready, baby," he assures, pulling you closer by snaking one arm around your body and snuggling into the top of your now blonde hair that he helped you with.

it's really all jokes and passing comments at first, san not in the rush for it if you're not ready, and you not thinking much because you just like being with him and there's no pressure to get to that stage yet even though you know it's coming.

but you trust and believe in san enough at this point that if he wants to, you figure you'd give yourself up for him.

"we were just too different, i think. but it's okay. we ended it on good terms and there wasn't any bad feelings," he recalls the story of his ex after you had asked, your ears and eyes intrigued while sipping the cup of pepsi in your lap.

san had gotten a new car, gave you an entire tour on it although you lacked any knowledge besides the fact it's a sports car and said he wanted to go driving around.

after almost a whole day of sightseeing and places he wanted you to see, almost every restaurants closing except fast foods, you two stocked up on burgers and sodas, driving to a cliff overlooking the city and now just chit-chatting.

the current topic crossing your mind because of what his friends said just piquing your interest, and you're honestly just a little nosy.

"but we're different too, no?" you blurt, lashes fluttering at the fact, because you two are different. he's so much more extroverted and carefree, and you're well... you. but your next comment more lively and lighthearted. "does that mean we're also doomed?"

san chuckles and shakes his head.

"but we're a good different," he says with a soft smile. "me and her, we were a kind of different that was never gonna work out. but you, you try for me even if it's out of your comfort zone."

the compliment makes you detach from the straw to return a heartwarming smile, but all of that gone the second you ask the next question.

"is she the one you lost your virginity to?"

and san can't control the snicker that rolls out; the view of you so serious bringing him a form of amusement.

"well, yes. my only other girlfriend was freshman year of high school."

"ooh..." you mumble, nodding and shifting in your seat and san thinks it's the last of it until you're hurling out another one. "how was it?"

he scoffs, but you're dead serious, he don't know whether to laugh again or be amazed at how actually willing you are to talk about it.

"i'm not gonna talk about sex with someone else right in front of my girlfriend," he counters, head shaking but tone amused. "y/n, you cuck."

you roll your eyes at the name, sitting up and shrugging to mutter a response that gets a quiet chuckle out of him.

"just wanted to know how it's like."

"then go watch porn."

"they're too unrealistic and exaggerated," you reason. "the fake moans, crazy positions, and the fact everything always go perfectly."

san smirks, jumping the gun to tease you, "well how would you know, you never had sex before."

"pfft," you huff, the next sequence of words leaving without much thought. just that you want to win the banter. "that's 'cause you won't fuck me."

san stiffens in his seat immediately, both taken aback and aroused by what had just fallen from your lips, throwing a "woah!" that settles the reality for you as well.

"i'll fuck you, alright. if you let me, i'll fuck you good."

and he's only kidding, though a bit turned on, not actually expecting for you to go silent as if having to make the toughest decision ever, only for you to blurt out the green light that takes his breath away.

"t-then do it," you say, nervous and shaking a little, but also confident that you're ready and want to give yourself to the man in front of you, the food and drink between your thighs forgotten at this point.

"y-you're serious?" it's his turn to stutter, the turnout of the entire situation a bit unbelievable. "because if you're just playing with me, i think i might cry. you've already given me blue balls one too many times."

you giggle at the desperation and almost denial crossing his face, assuring him you're being truthful, but the man still won't stop talking as if he's a caveman finally securing the chance to get laid.

"no because you're so mean if--"

you cut him off with a kiss, the silence thickening and finally pulling away to his blinking and innocent lashes before something else entirely comes over him. the thin line on his lips turning to a smirk.

"you don't know what you just did," he mutters, deep and sinister and so sexy that your knees can't help but to go a little weak before he pulls you right back for an even messier kiss--tongue and all.

when you feel the food faltering, the drink now even colder and wetter against one of your thighs, you push him back lightly by the chest, mumbling a "wait" as he watches impatiently for you to remove the obstacles so he can resume the kiss.

it's immediate and happens fast, his lips connecting yours again with your fingers dipping around his shirt to find a place to rest, your breath taken away at this point by how eager he's moving that by the time he finally lets you catch your breath, it must've been a whole minute.

"just gonna come over to that side," he tells you ahead of time, your equally desperate body and head nodding before he climbs over and pushes your seat back, adjusting it just enough for you to be in an almost sleeping position.

and one thing leading to another, the night long gone and something else in yours and san's heads; for you, the fact you're about to lose your virginity in his new car and so sure but also shy of it when he's moved on from kissing to wanting to eat you out, but stopping when a sudden realization hits.

"are you sure you want to do this?" he asks, voice soft and eyes full of warmth unlike the person he was just five seconds ago.

you nod, muttering, "i'm sure."

"alright. then we're gonna have to go get condoms," he informs. "to be safe."

it's always a little embarrassing and flustering even for san although it shouldn't be, but a mere glance and reminder of you makes the awkward encounter at checkout worth it.

"should we go somewhere else more... private?" you voice concernedly, the car no longer secluded and with a view of the city but now in the parking lot of the 24 hours convenience store.

san swipes a few glances out the window and shakes his head.

"should be okay. there isn't anyone," he says, tone calm and not at all fazed unlike the current expression you have on that brings out the tiniest smirk from him. "why? scared someone's gonna see?"

he's cocky and annoying and kind of hot at the same time, you just roll your eyes.

"don't worry about it, babe," he assures once more, the softer and slight playfulness gone the next second. "now can i eat you out?"

and you've gotten accustomed to his blunt personality; how he just blurts and say things without a filter, but your face still gets a little hot and your cheeks still turns a blush pink.

you don't say anything except nodding your head slowly but surely, a minuscule smile on san's lips before crossing to your side again to settle on his knees as he stares up at you through the faint car lighting, his hands holding no hesitation to grip the end of your skirt while you widen your legs for easier access.

a whimper's followed by the biting of your lower lip when he's managed to bunch your skirt all the way up to your hips, the skin on your legs now more exposed than ever and feeling all kinds of naked under the eye of san's hungry gaze.

"no safety shorts?" he teases, that cocky tone making a comeback. "you want it quick and fast, don't you?"

you'd probably hit him if not for the fact he's right, the itch you have dying to be fulfilled by only him that all you can do is whine a pathetic, "h-hurry" never have a single word satisfied san so much to this extent.

with a smirk and eager pull, your panty's on the floor of the car and your bare flesh on display for san and he's sure he already came a little.

when you start growing insecure, never in your life have you reveal and give this much of yourself to someone before, san is quick to jump in and comfort you, mumbling the word 'beautiful' as he kisses up one of your thighs with his hand on the other until he's close to your entrance.

with one suck of his breath and grips spreading your legs apart, the loudest moan yet falls from you when he dives in, his lips dancing on your vagina already sending you into a frenzy.

your legs can't help but to jolt in the air instinctly from the pleasure, more hot moans befalling when he sucks on your clit.

"oh fuck," you curse, lower lip now caught in between your teeth again because your boyfriend can eat pussy, his tongue and skill continuing to prove the point as it generates more moans and prompts your grip to rest on his hair, groaning and looking up into the ceiling of the car.

he finally pulls away after a few more seconds, your already fucked out face and harsh breathing feeding into his ego, going to cockily say, "like that?"

you nod, still trying to recover from the high and seeing a smirk overtake his lips.

"i think you'll like my cock even more," he says, sly and teasing, reaching for the condom and ripping the packaging under your watchful eye.

his arms are shortly wrapped around your body after, flipping and switching position till he's the one being seated and you're sprawled all over his lap, knees guarding his legs and poking the cushion underneath, just up and gawking at him as if waiting for the next instruction.

"can you be a good cowgirl?" he whispers, looking you in the eyes so smugly and boldly.

"guess we'll find out," you mumble, trying the utmost best to sound like you're not just the tiniest bit intimidated by having to stuff his entire cock inside of you; and especially scared when he unzips his pants and it springs out immediately as if screaming to get out the entire time.

it's veiny and thick and san can see through the doubts in your head, a giggle rushing past to hopefully lighten the situation.

"take your time, baby," he comforts, soft and heartwarming unlike the monster in his pants. "i'll help you."

his hands travel down to your ass and lifts you up, both your grips now on his shoulders and attempting to line your entrace to his tip, a moan flying from san when his tip just touches one of your folds, the silent curse from him so sexy and stimulating.

it's your turn to giggle at the slip-up, the man doing his best on self control tonight when he really was ready to start ramming the instant you gave him the go, but because you're new to all of this and inexperienced, he has to take it slow; let you know that there isn't a single thing to be rushed.

you can feel the warmth of his flesh when you finally lined up, throwing your arms around his neck and burying your head into his chest as the attempt start; something inside you both nervous but also excited.

the first half is met by moans from the both of you and a burning sensation at the stretch, but still so persistent to take all of him. make you and him feel good and ride him; his passing comments only fueling more of that determination.

"shit, baby. y-you're so tight," he puffs, his clutch on you getting tighter the lower you go, until he's fully in you and you're both breathing out signs of relief met by a quick silence shortly after.

you remove your head from his chest to look him in the eyes, his features always the perfect mix of sharp, handsome, and cute; when he swipes at your forehead to tuck a few strands of hair behind your ear, your stomach still flutters with butterflies despite the current position.

"you can move when you're ready," he says, breath against the tip of your skin when he presses his forehead to yours and take you in for another kiss. this time more messy and desperate, tongues clashing like it's the last time you're ever gonna kiss.

and once the makeout settles you in, the confidence and passion heating up, you start moving slowly with san's help, the pace picking up each time the kiss gets even deeper; moans and whimpers filling the air of the car until the fear's all gone and only replaced by the need for pleasure.

it feels good, and even better when he lands a slap to your ass while his other one squeezes at your breast, the seat creaking underneath but both too busy to care about anything else.

when your high's finally on the edge after a few more bounces, you tell him ahead of time, detaching from his lips and to his neck in preparation, your walls clenching and hitting its max just shortly after that also sends san into his climax from the sensation.

you pull back after catching your breath, staring into san's softer eyes before smiles and laughters take over the scene, san going on to ask, "how was it?"

"good," you answer. you can't believe you both just had sex in his new car.

mostly everything is still good; passing all your classes and still absolutely in love with san, every day learning something new about the other person as well as taking the time to explore what each other likes in bed.

mostly everything because you can't even remember the last time you had a proper conversation with jongho.

just a few weeks before the end of the semester, he already started coming to the library less and less until he just stopped showing completely.

his texts now always short and infrequent, nothing like the boy he was in high school when he'd send memes or daily complaints just to rack up your notifications.

every invitations to hang out or go somewhere with you and san always met with rejection. he's either busy with school works, has a club meeting, or already made plans with the members he met from the club.

you're happy for him and glad he's meeting new people, but you still can't help but to feel on the occasion that maybe he doesn't want to hang with you anymore now that he's met much cooler people; a bowling invitation yesterday that he also said no to although it's summer and you're sure he could spare just an hour or two.

because you love being with san and you're glad for chaewon's girl presence providing you an understanding and relatability neither san or jongho could, but you miss your best friend.

you miss having long discussions about the chosen movie of the night, sharing inside jokes and just talking about things only the two of you would get because he's been there for you since the fourth grade.

on the tuesday you have nothing to do in particular, you thought it's the perfect time to catch up and do something, even if just talking over slices of pizza.

you had texted him to make sure he's in the dorms and when he replied saying he is, you thought it'd be better to just walk the distance between the girls and boys dorms and ask him personally.

after all, he couldn't have too much on his schedule if it's summer.

but when the knock on his room isn't answered by him or his roommate who's hard to not remember, the disappointment that floods your system from seeing he has company is defeating.

"y/n?" you hear his voice from behind the much taller unnamed boy before his head peeks out.

"hey," you say, attempting your best to sound as normal as you can, and not like you're disappointed because you thought you were gonna get to spend some time with him.

"what's up?" he asks, face and body calm as if he hasn't been trying to avoid you. "you texted me. did you need anything?"

and you just panic then. all four boys staring you down and you can't possibly ruin their guy time by pulling your friend away just because you miss him.

"uhh--yeah. was just wondering if i can borrow your laptop. i'm gonna have to take mine to a repair shop tomorrow," you lie through your teeth, jumping onto the first thing that comes to mind.

"yeah, sure," he replies, turning his back on you to grab the laptop in his bag and handing it over once at the door again. "anything else?"

"ah--no," you stumble, retrieving the device and stumbling out a 'thank you' almost too awkwardly as a permanent smile stays on his face, but as if he's also waiting for you to be done with.

"well, i'll see you then," you mumble, hiding just the tiniest bit of sad behind your voice.

"i'll see you, y/n."

san said he will text you once he's on his way, so your head's currently against a pillow and scrolling through endless social feeds to pass time when the knock at the door gets you on your feet.

you half expect it to be chaewon because she forgot something, but the sight of your best friend takes your breath away a little, because maybe he's finally realized just how long you two have been apart.

"hi. i came to get my laptop."

your growing smile's wiped off that instant, only watching as jongho walks past you into the room with wandering eyes as you close the door.

"it's true girls are cleaner than guys," he comments, yours and chaewon's things neatly placed and arranged to the belonging side, nothing like his and yeosang's.

but you don't reply nor react to the comment, instead pulling his laptop out of the drawer that's been there since yesterday and still untouched because yours is completely fine, figuring you'll just try one last time.

"you know, you should really come bowling with me and san," you say, the same time you return his laptop.

you can see the exact moment he tenses up at your words and all composure from him before now gone.

you can also see the wheel spinning in his head and scrambling for an excuse because it's almost like despite asking, you knew he's gonna say no.

"eh, it's fine. i gotta catch up with some of the guys anyway. seonghwa's making us come up with a list of possible club activities for next semester."

it's a plausible and reasonable excuse, but still not good enough because you don't want to think about how much a semester of college's already drove the two of you apart.

"but you guys have fun. maybe another time," he tells you, completely unsuspecting to the apprehension on you or the conflict running round in your head.

"and when is that gonna be exactly?" your surprisingly abrasive tone stopping him before reaching the door, jongho turning around and meeting your unamused eyes.

"you always say the same thing whenever i ask," you add, the atmosphere scarily shifting when it all dawns on jongho how serious you are.

"it's true, though? i really can't today."

"i asked you two days in advance. you couldn't at the very least try and make some room?"

you're fast and filled with hurt, jongho's struggling to process the sudden hostility. he thought he was doing you a favor, to be fair.

"i didn't think it was gonna be this big of a deal?" he says, pitch high and confused almost like a question, because it isn't his intention to make you feel like he doesn't want to hang with you anymore.

"when was even the last time we did something together?" your voice a kind of disbelief because you feel you have the right to complain considering how long it really has been.

but jongho still looks rather unconvinced, like he doesn't understand why you're bringing it up and turning it into something to argue about.

"i didn't think it mattered all that much whether i was with you or not since san was there."

since you looked so happy with him and he could do two times more for you than jongho could, he didn't see it a problem if he let you guys be while he took some time for himself. to process the changes and come to terms with everything.

and it's obvious you weren't expecting the response by how you kind of just freeze up momentarily and swallows down before eventually finding something to say.

"of course it matters. you're my best friend, and it'd be even better if you could be there, too."

"but i can't always be with you," he counters, appreciative that you never forget him, always asking him to tag along with you and san but you also don't seem to be processing the changes as well.

all the perks that comes with being in a relationship and how jongho just can't stick and follow you like a lost puppy because you have someone else to be directing all the love and attention to.

he adds, "i only said no because i thought it'd be better for you to spend time with san alone. the dude's cool and all but i think even he'd have a problem if i was to tag along with him and his girlfriend all the time."

san already saw through him once and jongho doesn't want any chances of reviving his suspicions.

"you could've just told me that, you know... instead of avoiding us," you say, after a few seconds of silence because it felt like the entire thing could've been made much less dramatic if he did.

"yeah..." he mutters under his breath, "i'm sorry."

"it's fine," you dismiss, swallowing the knot in your throat. "but i hope you know... just because i'm with san now, it doesn't change anything between me and you. you're still someone special to me. someone nobody else can be. i do love san, but he also isn't you..."

san can't seem to get your words out of his head.

"but i hope you know… just because i'm with san now, it doesn't change anything between me and you. you're still someone special to me. someone nobody else can be. i do love san, but he also isn't you…"

it wasn't in his intention to snoop or listen in, his arrival coincidentally just in time to hear the voices coming from the room and even more surprised when he heard jongho's.

"i only said no because i thought it'd be better for you to spend time with san alone. the dude's cool and all but i think even he'd have a problem if i was to tag along with him and his girlfriend all the time."

it was jongho's initial response that took his attention, not wanting to listen any further on a conversation that he wasn't meant to hear, but now intrigued and curious because he didn't think it'd be him who was the topic.

each second feeling the thickening tension even though he was just a witness, but it was clear you guys just had an argument. and when he decided he'd just go wait for you in his car until you text or call back, he didn't expect your mumbling voice and words to hit so hard.

"i do love san, but he also isn't you…"

words that makes him sit in his car and just contemplate because it was exactly what he was afraid of: possibly taking you from jongho when he likes you as well.

you and jongho have a chemistry and bond even he's a little jealous of. the boy with the upper hand because he's known you since forever so it's natural you would be the most comfortable around him.

san understands and acknowledges that, but if it doesn't make him insecure at times, he'd by lying. and now for you to say that, it only heightens his worst insecurities.

hey, i'm sorry. something came up. but i should be ready now. are you in your car? ❤️ - y/n

yeah 🙂 - san

he greets and kisses you upon arrival like any other day, your pretty presence getting in his car and him driving to the bowling alley a couple blocks from campus.

but how you know something's bothering him is how easy he is to read. always so loud and chaotic but now all of a sudden so quiet to the point you're doing most of the talking.

and by how much of his balls are landing in the gutters, it only confirms the thought; carefully thinking of how to bring it up once you two finally gets back to the car, you asking a soft, "you okay, baby?" that snaps his head towards you.

even his response a bit dazed as he tells you he's good.

"if something's bothering you, you can tell me," you assure him, sympathetic and loving eyes his direction.

san isn't very good at holding back even if he tries, his heart always on his sleeves and his emotions big and reactive. he's never been one to be afraid at expressing himself so he doesn't see the need to be now.

he lets a low sigh escapes first, not exactly scared of telling you what it is, but of your response.

"i heard what you said to jongho," he breaks it, voice sharp and a bit grumpy.

"oh," is the response that slips because you had a feeling, his text from 20 minutes ago showing on your lockscreen when jongho finally left, but the conversation wasn't exactly of any importance to yours and san's relationship... at least you don't think.

"did i say something wrong?" you ask, nerves beginning to tense because you would never do it intentionally.

"i don't know if wrong's the word, but it definitely hurts to hear i'm not the one despite being your boyfriend," he says, a mix of sad but also cute with a pout, you can't help but to find it a little endearing because you love him so much and don't know why he would ever think that.

"i would never say that," you barely defend, causing the pout on him to be paired with angry brows because he don't know why you look like you want to smile. he's in a literal crisis.

"but you did. you said you love me but i'm not jongho, so i don't know how anyone's supposed to interpret that?''

he's puzzled when you just giggle instead, shaking your head.

"san," you say his name with a certain fondness and love, "yes, you're not him. but he's also not you. you both are so different but special to me in your own ways, i meant to say that... if only you had stayed longer."

you watch the apprehension on his face turn a calm one at the realization; his droopy lips settling to its normal shape again as he lets out an, "oh."

"yeah. but i do love you. as my boyfriend and partner." you smile as you see him try to fight an even bigger one at your consolation.

"i love you too," he returns, his heart now fully rested and relieved.

jongho thinks about what you said to him. how much love you have for him and how much he means to you... as a friend.

and as he watches you get out of san's car, a sight he wasn't really meant to see but more so an overlap he just so happened to come from the library the same time--he's happy you're in the hands of someone like san.

he knows he will treat you right and make you feel like the most special girl in the world.

and one day, jongho will find someone who he can give the love san's given you, and it won't hurt anymore.

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