#like don’t get em wrong the whole cast is amazing
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33. Chosen, by PC and Kristin Cast
Owned: No, library Page count: 322 My summary: Zoey Redbird is in trouble. Her friends are growing more distant, her boyfriend trouble has reared its head, and her undead friend is losing her humanity day by day. Nyx is leading her to unlikely corners to solve her problem - former foe Aphrodite starts to offer help, albeit reluctantly. But when vampyres start being killed, Zoey starts to realise there are bigger things at work here. Nyx’s path is hard to walk. And Zoey is going to find herself in huge trouble... My rating: 0/5 My commentary:
I have no excuses for why I'm continuing with the House of Night books. They're awful. There's so little to like about them. They're just a bigoted mess. And yet, they're also wild in how awful they are, so much that they wind up being incredibly entertaining in all the wrong ways. So I'm gonna keep reading 'em until either I'm sick of them, or I run out. Because this is my life now.
So there's four major things in this book I wanna talk about. Obviously, it's still homophobic and misogynistic as hell, I've talked about that before, that hasn't changed. The first of this particular book's sins is Loren Blake. He's a teacher at the House of Night who's shown a romantic interest in Zoey, so much so that she counts him as one of her three boyfriends. Surprise! He's grooming her! But not in the way that setup sounds like. No, he's actually just pretending to be into her so he can spy on her for Neferet, his actual lover. The problem this narrative has with him isn't that he's a teacher preying on a seventeen year old, it's that he's spying for Neferet. Ugh. It's also tied up in Zoey's misogyny - she denigrates other girls as sluts and skanks, but has sex with Loren. Then she wonders if she's turning into a slut. Which is clearly the biggest issue here. The sexual politics of this series are a fucking mess.
Then there's Zoey's ongoing relationships with her friends, who are all still one-note. They all turn against her in this one, mostly because she's hiding the Stevie Rae thing and doesn't tell them anything. But it starts at the opening scene, Zoey's birthday, where everyone gets her Christmas themed presents because her birthday's the 24th of December, and Zoey hates that. But doesn't tell them this beforehand or after, and is treating her friends getting her Christmas themed presents as a great betrayal. Priorities, girl! I don't know how she's meant to stay sympathetic, honestly. This is not a huge deal, and she's treating it like they're being mean to her, despite them not knowing she doesn't like it. So when Stevie Rae shows up, they all freak out (justifiably!) and shun Zoey for it. And because nuance is not a concept Cast is familiar with, it's in that very black and white You Are Either For Or Against Zoey way that every relationship Zoey has winds up. We're supposed to think they're treating Zoey unfairly, when actually it's her own damn fault. Meanwhile, Aphrodite is slowly becoming part of the team, but her and Zoey still spend the whole time sniping at each other in misogynistic ways, it's really unpleasant.
Third is the whole magic and religion thing. Vampyres are being murdered by humans, who belong to the People of Faith, a vaguely Christian organisation. Stevie Rae is becoming an Actual Vampire, with the sun weakness and the need to drink blood and be invited into houses thing. (I know I keep saying it, but why is this book not about witches? Stevie Rae can still separately be resurrected as a vampire.) Of course, the vampyres are all innocent victims (it's canon that the vampyres make up much of the high-profile members of society, what is the legal situation of vampyres in this world?) and all the People of Faith are cartoonishly evil and bigoted. Nuance is dead, long live nuance. Secondarily, Zoey's just amazing at all her magic now. She said she's been practicing, but we never see her do any work for it. She can summon wind and fire and all that! Sure would be nice to see her figure that out! But no, as ever, Zoey's just Naturally Good At All Things.
And then there's what I'm going to refer to as The Incident. So here's the setup. Zoey has gone to meet her human boyfriend, Heath, to break up with him. He gets her to drink more of his blood, during which some men catcall her. They are explicitly mentioned to be black. Zoey summons her affinity with the wind to blow a car into their path, hitting them. They could have died. We don't know. Which...what the fuck? Why specifically mention the ethnicity of these characters? The point this scene is meant to make is that Zoey is losing her humanity, but we don't see that in any other meaningful way, this whole thing just feels tacked-on. She doesn't have these murderous impulses anywhere else in her life! And while Zoey feels bad about what happened, she doesn't, like, check to see if they're okay, or call an ambulance. She just leaves. Which carries the really gross overtone that a) black men (of which there are no other explicit examples thus far in this book) are aggressive and sexually harass women and b) are totally fine to murder for the above incident. It's Just Disgusting.
Ugh. And yet, I've got the next installment on order. Riddle me that. Anyway, next up something much better - a house full of magical, troubled children.
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As a huge interview with the vampire fan I had my doubts after the first episode but Sam Reid popped his whole pussy as lestat and left no crumbs
#interview with the vampire#iwtv tv#sam reid#like don���t get em wrong the whole cast is amazing#Louis voice carries so much more than it did in the original#and despite Kristen dunst being younger this Claudia feels much more tragic in her eternal youth#but lestat is my crush since I knew what crushes were#and I had doubts about this man#but my god#he fucking got me as much as he got louis#it’s me I’m the victim
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I feel, quite disappointed with MS1. I feel like it had so much potential ? I don't really get why they cut MS in two parts. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely adored Wiseman, but I really really wanted to see Sellon and Anubias get more development and maybe even get a good redemption arc ? I ship ShunSellon and AnuDan hard so yeah, I guess I'm super biased, but I feel like both Sellon and Anubias could've made great love interests if they were even more fleshed out. Both dynamics are very interesting to me.
I mean, ShunSellon could have been amazing ! Sellon regretting her betrayal towards Shun could have been a nice turn and a great start for a redemption arc on her part, maybe her even ending up realizing she had grown affection for Soon and Chris would have been very sweet. Shun could've had great moments in all this too ! At first, of course he wouldn't want to give Sellon a second chance, but he could grow to understand why she did what she did and could've helped her with her misconceptions about humans...anyways, Sellon really needs to be talked about more.
When it comes to Anubias, I would have adored more interactions with his team. I feel like he never had good moments with them, he only interacted with them to give em orders and then immediately go back to thinking abt Dan. He could've had more sweet moments with Ben, Robin, Jack and Noah. As for his relationship with Dan, even if probably wasn't the intention of the writers, it could be seen as a crush. I mean, from the beginning, Anubias seems very little invested in Mag Mel's plans, he likes brawling and he likes to do it with Dan most. He could have dropped out that some point, deciding that he likes his team and brawling too much for destroying it all like Mag Mel wants. Him ending up with Dan could've been hella cute (I love rivals to lovers), but they didn't even need to, he could've become a great friend to Dan and also become the rival Dan fights the most.
Also, Sellon and Anubias' older sister and younger brother dynamic could have been legendary during their redemption. And there's no harm in them keeping a bit of mischief even if they become better people UwU
Anyways, Sellon, Anubias and their dynamics really needed more attention in my opinion...
(Take a shot everytime I said "could've" or "could have")
Peace out ! UwU
Hi, sorry for the late reply!
MS1 fell short in a couple of areas but overall I enjoyed it. However, I agree with you that rather than making a whole new season with only 20 episodes that ultimately did nothing for the overall story, those 20 episodes should’ve been used to properly flesh out MS1’s storyline.
MS1 has a fairly large cast but not enough time to spend on them or enough time to deviate from the plot and, I don’t know, revisit Gundalia and Neathia or Vestal? Especially considering that Mag Mel threatened to destroy multiple planets and all. And yeah, the dynamic between Shun and Sellon and Dan and Anubias could’ve been touched upon more.
I think in order for Sellon to have an arc like you mentioned, you’d have to rewrite her significantly. To the point where she would almost be a shell of her former self. Sellon loathes humans for their compassion and their friendships and she’s deeply devoted to Mag Mel no matter what. Sellon found acceptance with Chris and Soon and perhaps even a second chance with the Brawlers after she had betrayed them and she tossed it back in their faces with a laugh. Sellon risked her life repeatedly in order for her master to reign victorious in the end, and didn’t care for her own death so long as she could catch a glimpse of the magnificent world Mag Mel would create. Sellon was absolutely aware of the consequences of her actions and she didn't care. You’d have to rewrite her character to be like Anubias for her to even have a chance at redemption.
With that being said, I don't see how Sellon isn't Shun's love interest already? She verbally expressed interest in Shun despite him being human and made sparkly shoujo eyes in his direction LMAO how is that not enough.And Anubias and Dan had that whole mental link, pink sparkles moment that Drago and Wavern had so. Canon™
Speaking of Anubias, he did have some nice moments with his team. Whereas Sellon’s orders were absolute to Chris and Soon, Team Anubias didn't always obey Anubias but that didn't mean they looked down on him.
They were all a tightly knit unit and kept the name “Team Anubias” even after he died. You see Anubias being a mentor to Noah.
Not to mention, Anubias and Sellon feel differently when it comes to serving Mag Mel.
If anyone should’ve had a chance at redemption, Anubias would’ve been my choice because the pieces have already been laid in place for something like that to happen. (And if anything, it would’ve been more believable than either Masquerade or Spectra’s redemption lolol)
But while we're on that topic, I wanna talk a bit about redemption arcs because to me, it’s not something you should hand out to the characters you like willy nilly. This post perfectly puts into words how I feel about redemption arcs, and it’s the reason why I’m always very critical when it comes to these, no matter which show I’m watching.
In my opinion,giving Sellon a redemption arc wouldn't make sense because, with the given storyline, it would come out of nowhere and wouldn’t be earned. Handing out instant redemption to an antagonist with no redeemable qualities or remorse is the reason why Spectra can walk around and be friends with everyone like he didn’t do a bunch of inexcusable things back in S2. I think both Sellon and Spectra should stay evil and irredeemable because given their motivations and personalities and how they’ve been written thus far, anything else would be completely ludicrous.
The questions; “what message would it send to redeem this character?” and “would it be logical or satisfying on a narrative level to redeem this character?” should definitely be asked and thought over, and I don’t think the writers of S2 did that when they decided to redeem Spectra and Gus in favor of Volt, Lync and Hydron.
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It Had to be Witches
Dean and Sam are on a hunt at Rowena’s request. When Sam is out of commission, Dean has to work with you.
Warnings: Unprotected p in v (wrap it before you tap it!) male oral receiving, fingering, mention’s of witchcraft, brief mentions of ritual style murders, brief mention of animal sacrifice, Dean is a sad boy.
Word count: 3567
All written and proofread (poorly) by me. All mistakes are my own. Please don’t copy or repost my work. Likes are great and I’ll love you forever if you repost and comment. Thanks for reading.
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Sam and Dr. Philips examined each of the women’s bodies. Carved into their limbs were runes consistent with the ones Rowena described. She said she was sending an expert who lived in the area but the boys hadn’t made contact yet.
“The other agent who was just here asked the same questions. Don’t you guys talk to each other?” Dr. Philips covered the bodies. Some of the women he knew personally.
“Different departments. You said he was just here? How long ago?”
“She. Her name is Diana Luna. She’s down at the evidence locker. All the women had the same necklace. She went to check it out.”
Sam thanked the doctor and set off to find you. First he called Dean. “Looks like Rowena’s story checks out. Her expert was just here. The bodies were marked with runes and all of their tongues cut out. And, get this, they all had the same necklace. Maybe a coven?”
“Of course. Of course it’s witches, Sam. Look, don’t go far. I’m on my way.” Sam was sitting on a bus bench reading coroner's reports when you approached him. Due to the nature of the case, Rowena insisted the elder Winchester carry out the task at hand. “Use Sam as bait.” she instructed.
“Agent Cornell? I’m agent Luna from the Lansing office.” You extended your hand. “Director Macleod sent me.”
“Yeah, I bet she did. Bring me up to speed.”
“Sure. I’ve got what you’re looking for right here.” You blew a very potent powder in his face knocking him out. You put the lankier Winchester into your truck and sped back to your house. Getting his dead weight up the stairs was a task but you did it. “Sweet dreams, Sam.”
Dean searched the entire town square for Sam with no luck. He tried his phone again and it was going directly to voicemail. Sam could hold his own against any witch but Dean was still worried. As he unlocked the door to the Impala, he heard you call his name over his shoulder and turned his head to see who was speaking. You blew the dream dust into his face rendering him unconscious.
He was heavier than he looked. You shoved him into the back seat and pried the keys from his hand. Baby growled angrily when she started but you had her purring for you in no time. You drove him back to your house and dragged him inside where you intended to tie him up. Rowena coached you on all their tricks. You took off his jacket, rolled up his sleeves and divested him if anything sharp. With his wrists and ankles bound in a pretty decent slip knot you splashed his face with water to wake him.
“Morning, handsome.” he smirked as you wiped his face.
“Big mistake, sweetheart. I’m guessing you’re the one we’re looking for.”
“Pretty and dumb. Rowena was right and you would be guessing wrong. Her name is Teresa Wilson. She came seeking asylum with our coven a few months ago. Said her whole order was obliterated. Turns out, she wasn’t exactly who she said she was.”
His face split into a cocky grin, “They never are. What do you want with me?”
“You need to help me find her. Rowena gave me a locator spell. When I cast the spell, I’ll need your fancy bullets. Problem is…”
He laughed heartily, “Problem is you can’t touch ‘em, am I right, sweetheart?”
“You would be correct.”
“And what’s in it for me?”
You took a step back just out of his reach just in case, “If you help me I’ll let your brother live.”
He strained against the ropes veins bulging in his forearms. “If you touch one hair on his head I’ll rip you apart myself. You hear me, witch?”
Your nails dug sharp into the meat of his cheeks so he would look at you. “Relax, baby. Your brother is safe. He’s asleep upstairs dreaming of puppies and rainbows as we speak. But if you don’t help me, he’ll never wake up. And, Dean, when I kill someone, it sticks. No resurrections for Sammy this time.”
You’ve never seen a human man snarl before. It was pretty cute. Rowena warned you not to be mesmerized by his sweet face and his Disney Princess eyes but you couldn’t help it. The man looked like he would, in fact, rip you apart. And, Hecate help you, you wished he would. You traced a finger along his sharp stubble covered jaw. His eyes turned up to look into yours, throwing daggers at you. “Anyone ever tell you how cute you are when you’re angry?”
“All the time. Get to the spell so I can take my brother out of here.” he growled.
“It’s not time. If I untie you, are you gonna be a good boy or do I have to hit you with my knock out dust again?” You couldn’t take your eyes off of his perfect lips smiling at you.
“Sure, mommy, I’ll be a real good boy.”
You knelt in front of him and parted his knees slightly to undo the first knot. “Such a smart ass.” He growled low in his throat when you peered at him through your lashes. His dick grew painfully hard against his jeans as you slid your hand up his legs to maintain balance. Of course you noticed though he tried to squeeze his thighs together to hide his arousal. “Do you like me like this, Dean?”
Of course he did. You were just his type. A little bratty but you had a good heart. Rowena told them about you. The little warrior for the Grand Council. They constantly sent you to do their dirty work and you did so without question like a good soldier. No wonder Rowena paired the two of you. You were the female version of him. “Like what?” His voice was low and dripping with need.
“On my knees for you. Looks like you do.” You winked at him but he looked away embarrassed.
It had been a long time since he felt a woman wrapped hot around him. Everything in him wanted to follow your siren song and happily crash. He couldn’t do it. This story always ended bloody. “You couldn’t handle it, sweetheart.” He peered down at the bulge in his pants. So did you. Your core heated at the thought.
“Is that a dare or a double dare?.” He spread his legs and licked his lips inviting you to take what you wanted. You shook it off and focused on the task at hand. “Well in any case, I made you dinner. Pot roast, potatoes, peas and carrots. Eat if you want.”
It did smell amazing. His stomach growled remembering that all he had was coffee this morning. The living room and kitchen were well lit and warm. He felt at peace in this place. More so than the bunker where it could sometimes feel clinical and cold. “You got a pretty nice place here. You all alone?”
A sly smile played on your lips, “Just me.” You sat the plate down in front of him with a cold beer and a bottle opener. The oven timer dinged and, when you opened the door, the aroma of cinnamon and spice wafted through the air.
“That pie?” He sounded choked up.
“Apple. I have an orchard in the back. Rowena filled me in on how to keep you happy.” You sit it on the windowsill to cool while you ate. “I can’t have you bashing me over the head and running off before we kill this bitch.”
He shoveled a fork full of potatoes and gravy into his mouth humming in appreciation. “Why me? You had Sam here. He’s much better at this witch stuff than I am. Why drag me out here?”
“You’re more reliable when making difficult decisions. You’re what I need. Another beer?” He nodded breathing in the soft floral scent that wafted off of your skin as you moved.
You didn’t offer any further information and Dean thought that was probably for the best. If he got in his head about the situation he would lose his nerve and that can’t happen. That’s how people die. As of late, Sam has had a lot on his mind. Dean would have to shoulder this burden. At least Sammy was getting some rest.
The two of you shared a comfortable silence only marred by silverware hitting ceramic. “Well that was delicious. Thank you….umm…I don’t think I caught your name.”
“I didn’t give it to you. I’m Y/N. But I wouldn’t mind if you kept calling me sweetheart. Pie?”
Dean's heart beat hard in his chest at the thought of calling you sweetheart “Maybe a little. So when do we do this thing?”
“Eat your pie then meet me outside. I have to prepare.” You slipped out the back door down a dimly lit path to your cauldron. You threw in the mandrake and tobacco. Last was the chicken that you had to slaughter. You grabbed a hen from her coop and stabbed her with your athame. It made a terrible sound which sent Dean flying through the back door ready to fight.
“What the hell was that?”
“Chicken.” You allowed the rest of its blood to drain and discarded the carcass. “periisti. lates. Ego te quaero. I vestrum adprehendet vos.” You chanted over and over until a glowing beacon appeared. “We have to follow it.” The orb circled the two of you then floated towards the Impala. You retrieved his keys from your pocket and started off for the car.
“Whoa whoa whoa. What are you doing?”
“Following the orb.” He grabbed your arm as you started to slide into the driver’s seat.
“No one drives my baby but me. You sit shotgun.” He impatiently waited for you to scoot over. When you reached for the radio he slapped your hand away. “Are you serious?!”
“What? There were other decades besides the 70’s.” He bit his lip and flared his nostrils letting out an unsettling growl. “Driver picks the music.”
“You are a child. Just drive. The spell won’t last forever” you huffed.
“So, just you huh? No boyfriend? Girlfriend?” You didn’t answer keeping your eyes trained on the orb. “Yeah me neither. Maybe later we can grab a drink.”
“My god. Can you keep it in your pants until we’re done? It took a left!”
He sped up taking off after it, “I see it. So that’s not a no.” That was all the invitation he needed. The truth was you would have given it up the moment those green eyes stared into your soul.
“It’s not a no. Let’s focus.”
Baby ate up miles of dirt road before reaching the highway. A couple of miles ahead the orb sped for an exit into town. You were led to the motel where the boys were staying. The door to their room was wide open and there Teresa stood bathed in the light of the orb. You bid it a job well done and sent it on its way.
Teresa, caught off guard, quickly muttered a spell pinning Dean to the wall, sending the gun skittering away. You faced each other down while Dean struggled. “She’s a kid!” he groaned in pain.
“I’m nineteen thank you. You don’t have to do this Y/N. Come on. We’re sisters. We share the same DNA. Let’s take them on together.” Tears welled in your eyes. You may have been blood but you weren’t sisters. She grew up far out of the Grand Council’s reach while you were their trained lap dog.
“Only half little sister. You’re hopped up on enough stolen magic to power the entire city. The Grand Council sent me to take you down. Adiuro te in nomine Hecate. Adiuro te in nomine Dianae. Tuae vires cum luna decrescant.” you chanted. She fought back but the binding spell was powerful. She didn’t have enough magic to hold Dean and fight you so she let him go. When he regained composure, he dove for the gun.
Without warning, Teresa gained the upper hand. She held out her arm and used all of her might to pull you towards her. Blood stained tears fell from your eyes as you struggled to breath. With every last ounce of strength you had you doubled down on the binding spell long enough to hold her so that Dean could put her down. The blast of the shot filled the small motel room filling your ears with a high pitched whining. You collapsed onto the floor where Dean scooped you into his arms.
“Hey, Y/N. Wake up. Stay with me. Shit.” He carried you to the car and gingerly set you down next to him. The drive back to your house felt long. When he got you inside he placed you on the couch and called Rowena.
“Is it done then?” she asked in her thick Scottish brogue.
“Yeah but your girl’s unconscious. She’s breathing but she used a lot of magic. A lot. I don’t think you’ll be calling on her anytime soon.”
“Keep her warm, Dean. I’ll be there soon.” The line went dead. He sat on the floor in front of you and brushed your hair from your eyes.
“Sweetheart, you need to wake up. We were supposed to grab that drink, remember?” He pressed his lips to your temple lingering there for a moment when he heard Rowena’s laugh trill behind him.
“I should add matchmaker to my long list of talents. Out of the way, Dean. I’ll get your girl fixed right up.” She patted his hand and pushed him aside.
His face flushes hot burning all the way to his ears. ”She’s not my girl.”
“Of course. Now, what seems to be the trouble, dear?” She placed her hands on your head. Her eyes glowed as she spoke over you. Your lashes began to flutter and you woke up. “There she is. Good as new.” You and Dean exchanged a look. “That appears to be my cue to go check on Samuel.”
“Thank you, Rowena.” your voice was hoarse barely above a whisper.
“Not at all, dear.”
Dean pulled you into his lap rocking you gently, “You scared the hell out of me, sweetheart.”
“I had to stop her. She hurt too many people.” You felt guilty for ending her but even guiltier for letting her go as far as she did. Guiltier still for not pushing harder to be in her life. “It was my fault.”
“Hey, no it wasn’t. What? You think you should have been a better big sister? You didn’t lead her down this path, Y/N.” You rested your head on his shoulder “All these years and all the stupid fucked up shit Sam and I did, I blamed myself. I took on that burden. Alone. It’s a lonely awful place to be. I’m begging don’t do that to yourself.” He held your face in his hands forcing you to look at him. He wanted to kiss you. You would have let him if he leaned in. Instead he brought you back down to his chest just to hold you. He saw so much of himself in you. You were headstrong and self righteous but your intentions were altruistic.
You melted into his arms so lost in him that you didn’t hear Sam and Rowena slip out. Dean offered his brother only a small nod to let him know you were ok. He had several texts from Eileen anyway. Happy to see his brother didn’t have to spend another night alone, he went back to the bunker.
You sat in silence for a while when you started yawning. “Shit. What time is it?”
“After midnight. I should get outta here.” You untangled yourself from his grasp but didn’t stand. His hands stayed respectfully at the small of your back. You locked eyes with him. Your core tingled as he brushed errant hair from your forehead.
“Or you could stay. We haven’t had our drink yet. Though, you don’t need to get me drunk, handsome.” You kissed his jaw and down his neck working your way to his collarbone. A soft moan escaped his lips when you nipped at his neck. “I mean you enjoyed me on my knees and all.”
“As pretty as you looked,” his voice was low and gravelly, “And, I mean you looked gorgeous. We really shouldn’t.”
You genuinely pouted your lips backing off of your ministrations, “Why not? I want to. And you clearly want to. You’re a fucking legend, Dean. Show me just how legendary you are.”
He arched a brow at you and smirked in the way that only Dean Winchester does. “Flattery will get you everywhere, sweetheart.” Finally his lips were on yours. The force of his kiss took your breath away. It wasn’t predatory or greedy. It was slow and sensuous bordering on hunger. His whole body was hungry for you. Dean Winchester was hungry constantly looking for something to fill the hole inside him. For the moment, that was you. He felt like he was floating and was suddenly very warm. If he stopped kissing you he knew he would just stop breathing. He couldn’t bare the thought.
“What are you doing to me?” His chest heaved. “I feel like I’m on fire.” Surely this must be a spell or enchantment. He pulled you back in for more but this time his hands strayed from your back. They traveled to your hips then under the hem of your shirt to feel your flesh warm against him. He had to feel you. To be inside of you. Deft fingers unbuttoned your jeans. Without breaking the kiss he stroked your clothed core working up a rhythm that flooded you with arousal.
“Touch me, Dean. Please” you cried. Pushing your panties aside his fingers explored your dripping pussy. His pace is maddening. Your hips snapped fucking back hard. “Fuck, Dean. So good. I need your cock. Want you to split ne open.”
“You’ve got a filthy mouth, Princess. Come for me and I’ll give you what you want.” And so you gushed around him moaning like a witch on fire. When your heart slowed to a normal rhythm you stripped naked. Before he could get undressed he took a moment to kiss and touch every inch of you. If this was only for tonight he wanted to savor you. “God you’re beautiful.”
“So are you.” You pulled him up and undressed him, never once breaking eye contact. His cock was red and weeping just aching to be touched.
On your knees in front of him you took the whole burning thing in your mouth. To Dean, you were the most stunning creature to exist. You swirled your tongue around the head while you hollowed your cheeks sucking him in deeper still.
“You’re doing so well, sweetheart. Fuck that feels good.” His hands grasped the back of your head keeping you steady while he fucked your face. It started feeling too good like he would blow his load in your mouth. He had to feel your sweet cunt. “Let me feel you, baby. Fuck I need you.” You pulled off with a pop and climed into his lap. Both of you whimpered when you sank onto his length. The stretch was exquisite. Your pussy held him so tight. You ground your clit over his pubic bone while he fucked into you with a brutal pace. “You feel so good. M’not gonna last. Come for me, baby. I need it.” Your twat fluttered around him, milking him for all he was worth. You kissed once more fighting to hang on to the last tendrils of tenderness and warmth that you could.
“Stay. Please. Just for tonight” you whispered.
He tightened his grip on you. “Of course, sweetheart. All night.”
He hated to leave you but the sun rose like a beacon calling him away. If he didn’t leave then, he wouldn’t have ever left. Last time he stuck around and fell in love, he had to learn the hard way that he could never have this. Maybe he would call you the next time he swung through town. Maybe you’d spit in his face for bailing. He brushed the hair off your forehead and kissed your temple. “Bye, sweetheart.”
You woke when you heard the Impala roaring to life in your driveway. He left a square of paper with a phone number scrawled in pencil “I’ll always answer. -DW” You put on your robe, went down to your cauldron and threw it in with a few bundles of sage and some witch hazel to sever any feelings. On the next full moon, you’d do a cord cutting to make sure it sticks.
“See you around, handsome.” In his eleven hour drive back to the bunker, any feelings that you have would slowly fade. The two of you would go back to being too afraid to feel and far too afraid to fall in love. Dean wouldn’t hear from you again. He wouldn’t really remember where you lived. But, every time he drove through Michigan, he’d feel a twinge in his chest. And, no matter how many rituals you did, you’d feel him too.
#sam and dean#dean winchester#dean winchester angst#dean winchester smut#Dean Winchester fluff#dean winchester x reader#Dean Winchester x witch reader
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rise of the guardians ... sentence starters
“Would I trick you?”
“I am not afraid of you.“
“Still waiting for cookies!“
“I don't like it. Paint it red.“
“Am I on the naughty list?”
“My nightmares are ready.”
“You really don't remember?“
“Afraid? I'm not afraid of you.“
“Oh, good. That was my idea!“
“I make a mess of everything.“
“What a pretty little nightmare!“
“Since when do we need help?“
“What's happened to you guys?“
“We should never have trusted you!”
“Oh, rack off, ya bloody show pony!“
“Ha! On naughty list? You hold record.“
“You guys have been leaving gifts, right?“
“But none of 'em believe in you, do they?”
“They... they don't believe in me anymore.“
“It's not a competition. But, if it was... I win!”
“Oh, I really wish I had a camera right now!“
“How many times have I told you to knock?“
“Now we are getting down to tacks of brass.“
“Maybe not, but you are afraid of something.“
“They can't be my nightmares. I'm not afraid.“
“I do believe in you. I'm just not afraid of you!“
“Oh, don't look at me. I'm invisible, remember?“
“We were all someone before we were chosen.“
“I'd say ‘sweet dreams’, but there aren't any left.“
“Sorry. Not all of us get to work one night a year.“
“Maybe I want what you have. To be believed in.“
“Aw, you'll protect them? But who will protect you?“
“Uh, that's not really helping, but thanks, little man.“
“No. You said you wanted to be alone. So, be alone!“
“Y'know what I think? I think we just dodged a bullet.“
“This is all very flattering, but, uh, you don't want me.“
“Finally! Someone who knows how to have a little fun!”
“You should have seen them. They put up such a fight.“
“How can I know who I am... until I find out who I was?“
“It's the one thing I always know: People's greatest fears.“
“Wow, it is you! I mean it is you! I knew it wasn't a dream!“
“No! Listen, listen... I'm sorry. I didn't mean for this to happen.”
“Well, as long as he helps to, uh, to protect the children, right?“
“You can't get rid of me. Not forever. There will always be fear.“
“You put me here! The least you can do is tell me... tell me why.“
“Whoa, whoa, whoa! WHERE ARE THE BLOODY SEATBELTS?!“
“You make a mess wherever you go. Why, you're doing it right now.“
“Okay, look. You and I are obviously at what they call ‘a crossroads’.”
“No? I don't know what it's like to be cast out? To not be believed in?”
“But that was all he ever told me. And that was a long, long time ago.”
“I've believed in you for a long time, okay? Like, my whole life, in fact.“
“You're all hard work and deadlines, and I'm snowballs and fun times.“
“Then, I'm going to ignore you. But, you must be used to that, by now.”
“What fear? Of you? No one's been afraid of you since the Dark Ages!“
“Don't be nervous, it only riles them up more. They smell fear, you know.“
“Unseen. Unable to reach out to anyone. You want the answers so badly.“
“Oh, yeah. I love being shoved in a sack and tossed through a magic portal.“
“We are very busy bringing joy to children. We don't have time... for children.”
“It is what I was born with, eyes that have only seen the wonder in everything!“
“If there's something I'm doing wrong, can you... can you just tell me what it is?“
“Don't look at me like that, old friend. You must have known this day would come.“
“If it wasn't a dream, and if you are real, then you have to prove it. Like, right now.“
“Well, let me ease your mind about one thing: They'll never accept you. Not really.“
“Slow down would you, I've been trying to bust in here for years. I want a good look!“
“Everyone frightened. Miserable! Such happy times for me. Oh, the power I wielded!“
“I did this jump, and it was amazing, and I slide under a car, and it was awesome --- !“
“Darkness. That's the first thing I remember. It was dark, it was cold, and I was scared.“
“Have you ever seen a more adorable lateral incisor in all of your life?! Look how she flossed!“
“Why I was there and what I was meant to do, that I've never known, and a part of me wonders if I ever will.“
“It was so big, and it was so bright. It seemed to chase the darkness away. And when it did... I wasn't scared anymore.“
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Notable 2020 Video Game Soundtracks That Can Be Enjoyed As Standalone Experiences
Video Game Music is gaining recognition, with many soundtracks receiving vinyl pressings, orchestral concert reviews, and an increasing presence on music streaming platforms such as bandcamp and Spotify. We’re also witnessing the uprise of indie video game development teams where games are being made by the sort of passionate type of game designer that takes soundtracks seriously. Soundtracks by small teams of developers such as Celeste, Undertale, Disco Elysium, Hollow Knight, RuneScape, and Lisa: The Joyful are titles with soundtracks that easily stand up against the likes of bigger budget productions made by reliable sources of video game music like Square-Enix and Nintendo.
2020 is no exception in terms of having one of the biggest budget soundtracks around with Final Fantasy 7 Remake, which builds upon a legacy of industry-standard-creating soundtrack work. Taken as a whole, Final Fantasy 7 Remake’s soundtrack is clocking in at over 8 and half hours of music. The soundtrack has three composers with the Beethoven of video game music, Nobuo Uematsu, most notably coming out of retirement to get the job done. Here are some other amazing 2020 video game soundtracks more conducive for standalone background listening:
TETRIS EFFECT by HYDELIC
Genres: EDM, Ambient Pop and straight up Ambient
Describing this album makes me feel like I’m some sort of burnt out fanciful raver, head permanently lodged in the clouds. The level of giddy technicolor enthusiasm rivals that of Icelandic Sigur Ros frontman Jonsi, but if he wanted to keep his post-rock firmly planted in the outdoor music festival on Mars territory. Despite the album’s notable two hours runtime, each and every song feels like its own uniquely crafted composition, no repetitive motifs or nostalgia-baiting.
There is unfortunately still a Tetris movie in some sort of shaggy state of development in Hollywood right now. The movie is being billed as a dull biopic about the creator of the Tetris game. Whereas listening to Tetris Effect you imagine a Tetris movie directed by someone more fitting like the Wakowskis. Tetris Effect’s opening song “Connected (Yours Forever)” is a bonafide vocal pop song, like a more sugary CVRCHES-style cooing of the lyrics:
“I’m Yours Forever
There is No End in Sights For Us,
Nothing Can Measure the Kind of Strength Inside Our Hearts,
It’s all connected we’re all together in this life, don’t you forget it
We’re all connected in this”
Try your best not to imagine a cast of Hollywood’s most beautiful plucky orphan mutant misfit youths using the power of Tetris to heal a broken and dying planet!
Notable Track: Next Chapter
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HADES by DARREN KORB
Genres: Progressive Metal, Folktronica, Folk Metal, Dimotika, Greek Folk Music
Darren Korb has become one of the most notable video game composers of the past decade. Korb, an integral member of the Supergiant family, continues to outdo himself with each and every soundtrack. Bastion and Transistor originally found Korb creating a niche for himself with downtempo folk-infused electronic soundscapes and even some vocal pop with collaborator Ashley Barrett. Hades is an altogether different beast for Korb, who much like the developers of Hades, have found themselves at the height of their powers.
Korb also contributes vocals on this album, and I can say without hesitation that these are some of the nicest vocals I’ve ever heard from a video game music designer, because video game musicians are bonafide musicians.The album clocks in at two and half hours and separate from its game is still an absolute thrill ride.
Notable Track: In The Blood
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DEFECTIVE HOLIDAY by MECHATOK
Genres: Ambient Trance, Balearic Beat, Progressive Electronic, Nature Recordings, Spoken Word, New Age
One glance at the album artwork is all it took for me to know that I must listen to this album. Defective Holiday is an indie walking simulator that is explicit about its intentions: a lightly interactive one hour experience. This soundtrack clocks in at only 31 minutes and it is purely the most conventional album in terms of length.
Last week in late November, Mechatok announced a collaboration with one of the leading zoomer Swedish cloud rap mavericks Bladee, the cofounder of the Drain Gang. Last month gives a pretty clear picture of what kind of circles Mechatok is floating in on. Highly online gonzo vaporwave maestro James Ferraro is another apparent influence on this soundtrack, especially regarding the way the sinister mundane dialogue is woven into the soundscape. There’s one particular track on the Defective Holiday OST, “Rescue Shot Buibo”, that is adorned with standard trap-style drum fills that give the album a shot of energy before wandering back off into the haze. This soundtrack and video game is all about the pure vibe and aesthetic nature that are currently trending in these extremely stressful times. In a time where all of our holidays were defective from the very start, I think the casual walking simulator will remain a genre high in demand. I have a feeling we’re going to hear a lot more from this empathetic young German.
Notable Track: Valley
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Last of Us II by Gustavo Santaolalla, Mac Quayle (and Ashley Johnson)
Genres: Ambient, Cinematic Classical, Dark Ambient, Spanish Folk Music
L
The Last Of Us is a horror game where the music itself is arguably playing a critical character role, which can only be expected billing two titans of audio visual soundtracks. Of course Academy Award winner Santaolalla knows his way around a soundtrack. Wielding a resume of astonishing versatility in various TV and film projects, he might have found his higher calling in not only video games but in the horror music canon. Last of Us is an extremely emotional series, and with the wrong soundtrack, the experience could become insufferably bleak. The occasional splashes of color and light are what make this soundtrack so unsettling and eerie. Not since Silent Hill 2’s Akira Yamaoka has there been such an effective standalone horror video game soundtrack experience. No wonder Gustavo Santaolalla is one of the only video game composers integral enough to the game to warrant a cameo banjo-playing character model based off of him.
As if having one major composer from prestigious TV and movies wasn’t enough, Mac Quayle, composer of the whole Mr. Robot series, contrasts against Santaolalla’s acoustic contributions. The soundtrack itself is sequenced in a way that switches between the two composers. “The Cycle of Violence” composed by Quayle, a track that more than lives up to its name, is immediately followed by Santaolalla’s somber “Reclaimed Memories.” This dance between violence and heart is what the Last of Us excels at as a franchise, and that is why this soundtrack is an effective stand-alone experience.
The only disappointing part of the soundtrack is that Ashley Johnson, voice actor of Ellie’ three songs, is not included in the game’s official tracklist. Ellie’s “Take On Me” a-ha and “Future Days” Pearl Jam covers have made a little history by being the most powerful songs sung by a video game character. When Ellie sings and plays on her guitar they aren’t some little Easter egg idling moments to provide levity for this heavy revenge horror story. These songs are used to make some of the strongest character development choices made by a video game character seen in recent years. Ellie is joining a small club of singing video game characters alongside Parapa the Rapper and maybe the cast of obscure Atlus title Rhapsody: Musical Adventure.
Notable Track: Unbroken
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Persona 5 Royal Straight Flush Edition by Shoji Meguro
Genre: Acid Jazz, Alternative Rock, Alternative Metal, Lounge, Jazz-Funk
This is one of those soundtracks that, much like Nobuo Uematsu’s work in Final Fantasy, is really the heart and soul of the entire Persona franchise (and his work in the adjacent Shin Megami Tensei universe is equally as noteworthy). Persona 5 Royal finds Meguro making his most complete, funky, and otherworldly opus that sounds like no one else in the biz.
You will find many people online scouring message boards, subreddits, bandcamp features, and Yahoo Answers looking for more music like Persona 5. Outside of Metal Gear Solid: Snake Eater, how many other games are packed to the brim with truly foxy songs!? Persona 5 could not predict how badly the title “Throw Away Your Mask” would age, despite the game being more than ahead of its time with the majority of NPCs wearing PPE. Be a good Joker, put on your mask and keep chasing Meguro’s acid jazz-infused dragon through many more semesters to come.
Notable Track: I Imagine
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Streets of Rage 4 by Olivier Deriviere & Various
Genres: Electro House, Nu Jazz, Synth Funk, Acid House
Composer Olivier Deriviere is a living definition of a video game soundtrack journeyman. He has a career stretching back to the early 2000s working on notable big budget titles like the divisive 2008 Atari fifth Alone in the Dark installment and Remember Me, an unsung buried gem from the PS3/360 era Capcom title. Remember Me is where Deriviere’s electronic leanings started becoming especially prominent in his sound. On the Streets of Rage 4 soundtrack Deriviere has completely come into his own element, developing a whole new sense of campy playfulness.
Electronic French House music can be a divisive genre. For every Daft Punk commercial success there is a band that ruffles feathers like Justice. I sense a strong presence of late departed French House titan Philippe Zdar of Cassius as well. If you’d played this soundtrack for me out of context, I would have guessed an obscure voguing tape from the 80s or a really talented mysterious DJ set. Instead, this is a sequel to a classic beat em up franchise that left a portion of players disappointed by the game’s four hour playtime. The soundtrack is over an hour and fifty minutes long of high octane House music bliss. Much like the Tetris Effect soundtrack, it is truly impressive how much depth these tracks have when they could have easily been nostalgic recycled beats. Sometimes a game’s soundtrack can offer more post game enjoyment than an actual game.
Notable Track: Chill Or Don’t
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Hylics 2 by Chuck Salamone & Mason Lindroth
Genres: Experimental Rock, Neo-Psychedelia, Hypagogic Pop, Stoner Rock, Jazz-Rock
A soundtrack that comes closest to capturing the experience of hearing the Earthbound or Katamari Damacy soundtracks for the first time. The Hylic indie RPG series is a wonderful and strange beast that is ready to frolic and show its playful side. Hylics is a part of a recent uprising of indie games being developed on the RPG Maker software. 2020 year has left us all with variations of the same stressed out adjectives: Weird. Messed Up. Surreal.
Why not listen to an album from a game that is the perfect embodiment of that surreal mantra? Step away from your computer, draw a bath, and put this album on. Thank me later!
Notable track: Xeno Arcadia
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Ultrakill: Infinite Hyperdeath (Act I Soundtrack) by Heaven Pierce Her aka game developer Arsi “Hakita” Patala
Genres: Drum and Bass, Industrial Metal, Ambient, Progressive Metal, Acidcore
Nothing says “modern indie game development” more than a game built completely from the ground up by one person. Ultrakill’s developer “Hakita” is one of those kindly folkloric DIY figures that make video games such an extensive art form. The game is a painstaking gloriously bloody ode to Dooms of yesteryear but with plenty of its own fine tuned style. The perfect soundtrack for when you’re painting your personal Hell a darker shade of gore, but also would really like to kick your ass into shape if you need an adrenaline boost to your Quarantine blues.
Notable Track: Panic Betrayer
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Risk of Rain 2 by Chris Christodoulou
Genres: Progressive Rock, Space Rock, Space Ambient, Post-Rock
Something about the country of Greece brings the best kind of futurism out of the country’s composers. Christodoulou’s Risk of Rain 2 soundtrack is no Bladerunner knock off. This soundtrack for the colorful sci-fi indie rougelike is punchier and less nocturnal than your typical synth-heavy sci-fi soundtrack. Risk of Rain is one of the more successful Kickstarter series around and has the best quality an indie game can have: it feels like a labor of love on all fronts. There’s no reason a rougelike like Rain of Ruin or Hades needs a soundtrack this good, but Christodoulou casts a spell with his electronic-driven prog rock that makes you want to keep respawning. A huge missed opportunity if Christodoulou does not get to soundtrack an earnest sci-fi action-adventure for even big screens. Oh! This soundtrack also features some spoken word segments from Werner Herzog; what more do you need to know?
Notable Track: The Rain Formerly Known As Purple
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Warhammer 40,000: Mechanicus by Guillaume David
A big debut project from an up-and-coming composer Guillaume David. Prior to the making of this soundtrack, David was a video game voice actor who worked on a Resident Evil Devil May Cry crossover voicing the character of “Hunk.” Warhammer 40K might become a franchise that more people will care about solely based on the quality of this installment’s soundtrack. When you see the title Warhammer 40,000, what sort of sounds come to mind? If you guessed “Neo gothic cyber Gregorian chants that seamlessly melds the ancient and futuristic”, you would be correct. A turn-based action game could possibly fall into dull territory, but with a visual identity as strong as Warhammer 40K melded with a suitable musical atmosphere, the action and world becomes irresistible. This soundtrack is a brisk 56 minutes and the other soundtrack on this list with a more conventional runtime. Not a second is wasted on this dynamic and fantastical soundtrack. Prior to hearing this soundtrack I had no intention of ever looking into playing a game based off of something as convoluted as Warhammer 40K, but now I very much want to know what these robot priests are about. That’s the magic of a quality soundtrack.
Notable track: Millenial Rage
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Honorable Mentions:
Happy Listening!
#Video Games#Video Game Music#Soundtracks#Top 10#Video Games 2020#Final Fantasy 7#Persona 5#Streets of Rage#Hylic#Utrakill#Risk of Rain#indie games#Square Enix#Warhammer 40k#last of us#Last of us 2
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Big Jet Plane
by: kjllingmoon (me, hi) || my twitter
chapters: 1/1 || words: 2.6k || rating: general audiences
summary:
It was a bad idea.
Still, it couldn't hurt to help.
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In which Kojiro takes a beat-up Kaoru home after his little escapade from the hospital.
This was a bad idea.
It was one thing to let Kaoru stay in the restaurant despite sneaking out of the hospital with a broken leg (which, by the way, how the hell did he manage to get to Luce by himself?), but this was in another league of its own. He could already hear the slew of insults coming his way. You dopey gorilla, what if you dropped me? Why would you let me fall asleep without knowing if I have a concussion? I see your interior decor hasn’t gotten much better since last time.
He could stand it and not fight back, if just for one night. Frankly, he felt comfort when seeing Kaoru at the restaurant. It meant the accident wasn’t too bad, at least physically. And there was the sense of superiority that came with knowing he chose his restaurant, of all places. Superiority at knowing he was Kaoru’s priority, and comfort at knowing Kaoru still cared for him. Despite everything—the years of arguing, being split up during their respective years of higher education—there was still care. Which is more than what he could ever feel towards that other asshole.
It wasn’t like he’d verbalize how he felt on the ride to the emergency room. Hours had passed and he still couldn’t figure out if he had been shaking from the worry towards his friend, or hatred towards the man they once thought they knew. All that was certain was the regret he felt upon not beating Aino—Adam to a pulp right then and there, for everyone to see.
Ainosuke, Adam. The same rotten person at the core.
That violent nature wasn’t like Kojiro, it wasn’t expected of him. Which only angered him further. How was it that he and Kaoru let it get this far? S had begun as a way of self-expression, and it snowballed into a free-for-all that sometimes made him sick to his stomach. The notoriety got to his head, despite the promise he’d made to himself years ago. It was a tricky situation, one he didn’t like thinking about yet still kept him up at night.
Kojiro sighed in relief as his house came into a clearer view (giving him a break from his thoughts), surprised Kaoru slept through the ride. The pain meds must have kicked in…. He fished his keys from the pocket of his jeans and unlocked his front door, turning a light on before carefully pushing Kaoru inside. The door was promptly closed and locked, followed by his shoes being removed and all the shit in his pockets being moved to the bowl next to the door.
Once again, he found himself debating his options. He knew fully well that he should have dropped him back off at the hospital, it’d been ringing around his head during the whole walk back to his house. How was he supposed to know he’d be okay, though? Surely one night won’t kill him. They’ve gotten into bigger problems and walked away unscathed. Then again, neither of them had gotten swatted at high speed by a fucking piece of wood and metal until that night.
Options, Kojiro.
Perhaps he could start with actually waking Kaoru up and asking if he’s okay. He crouched in front of the wheelchair, nearly eye-to-eye with the man, and carefully shook him by the shoulder. “Oi, Ru. Up and at ‘em, c’mon.”
Silence. He remained still as the other stirred, bright yellow eyes looking around in confusion. Another thing Kojiro would never verbalize was the way his heart picked up as he saw thin eyebrows knit together, chapped lips pursing.
“Kojiro.” Kaoru groaned, removing his glasses. His heart had moved on from picking up to doing backflips. He began scratching at his eyes, and the act made him look younger and even more fucked up at the same time. Amazing. “Why are you staring? Didn’t your mother teach you that’s rude?”
She never said anything about admiring pretty things. “Whaddaya need, kid? Want me to take you to bed, maybe get you some food?”
Both of them looked down at Kaoru’s lap, at the way his free hand fiddled with the temples of his glasses. It felt awkward; like he was actually… embarrassed of whatever was on his mind. Kojiro stood up, figuring he’d be doing him a favor by giving him the time and space to speak. No use in forcing words through a muddled mind. He took a seat on his couch, his back facing Kaoru.
“Back at the hospital, they just…” Kaoru sounded frustrated and like he’d given up despite barely beginning. Kojiro didn’t move. “They only cleaned the affected areas and I knocked out as soon as my head touched the pillow. I feel dirty.”
Ah. Hot springs, showers. Same difference. Kojiro wouldn’t find the courage in either scenario.
“Will you wash my hair?”
A terrible, no good idea, indeed.
And yet, he got up and wheeled him into the bathroom, with not so much as a peep leaving his mouth. It’s the friendly thing to do. It also wasn’t anything new between them; Kojiro saw it as one of the perks of having known him for more than half their lives.
And yet, as he helped Kaoru sit on the toilet seat and turned Carla off to preserve her battery, he couldn’t stop thinking about it. What a bad idea. Washing his hair, as if they were an old couple, with habits and routines.
Are you implying that friends can’t have routines? Have you seen how the kids act around each other?
“How are you keeping my cast dry?”
The two men looked at each other, playing a mental game of chess. With all the bandages around Kaoru’s face, the cast had become the last of Kojiro’s concerns, but he was right. Without excusing himself, he retreated back to the kitchen, returning shortly after with a trash bag in one hand and an old beach chair in the other. “S’not perfect, but I think it’ll get the job done.”
“You don’t have to do all this, you know.” Kaoru still had that embarrassed inflection to his tone. It was reminiscent of a time when Kojiro had to make up an excuse or other as to why they kept cutting class. “I know I asked you to—”
“And that’s all there is to it.” Kojiro took a step back from his shower, looking at the chair smack in the middle of the tiled floor. It was a ridiculous setup, but it would work, for now. Hopefully. “You’re my friend, Kaoru. You’re asking for a favor.
“Before you even think of it,” he added, now turning to face the other, trying to figure out where to begin the process. Maybe undressing the bruises would be a good start. “I’m not doing this out of pity. I know you wouldn’t let me if that were the case.”
His hands were shaking again. They were chef’s hands, trained for years to be steady and precise. The experience had roughed them up, with various small slices and healed burns around his fingers and palms serving as evidence of his hard work. They were athlete’s hands, being accustomed to heavy lifting and scraping along the concrete on his board. Hands that held pride in his achievements and deceit in the shape of women. Steady, sturdy hands, goldened by the sun and failing him before his very eyes.
He began with the bulk of the bruises—his jaw. While one hand cupped Kaoru’s chin, the other one removed the tape holding the gauze to his skin, being careful to not tug at it too hard. Gnarly purples and reds came into view, the bruise obviously still fresh. Then he moved to the bandages around his neck, then his head. Neither of them dared speak, even when they winced at the sight or the sensitivity.
The anger was resurfacing. One good punch, right in the nose. That’s all he wanted. “Think you can stand?” Kojiro felt too loud in the small room, even though his voice was low. He took a step back and extended his hands, as if to invite Kaoru to try.
The other’s felt soft. He took good care of them, needing them to make a living. They were polished, well cared for, albeit also scarred from his tinkering with his AI materials and his experience skateboarding. They were pale, seeming bright as they held the other’s. Such a contrast.
Both of them took their time in getting Kaoru to his feet. It was a process, trying to balance him to remove his robe and get him in the shower. Kojiro didn’t bother removing the arm brace; that’s a bridge they could cross later. The big plastic bag was wrapped around the leg cast, with both of them hoping the water would stay out. A messy, bad idea.
It only took Kojiro a minute to strip down to his underwear. He couldn’t afford to get lost in his thoughts again; being shirtless at Crazy Rock, being half-naked with the man consuming every waking second of his life for the last few months—what’s the difference, right? He was making himself dizzy, going in circles.
He turned the faucet on, being careful not to wet Kaoru just yet. The detachable shower head was gripped, and he pointed it at the wall, feeling the steady stream until it was at a comfortable temperature. Then he began.
The ends of the long hair were first, going up to his scalp, digging his fingers into it to make sure everything got properly wettened. The faucet turned off, and he squirted shampoo onto his palm, feeling automatic; as if this really had been a habit of theirs for the longest time. Why wasn’t it? Why had his cowardice driven him into this cycle of guilt and heightened expectations— why didn’t those girls suffice him? What made him think he could ever compare to the thrill given to Kaoru when Ainosuke was in the mix?
The sound of a sob pulled him out of his thoughts. He furrowed his brows and pulled his hands back, initially thinking he had hurt Kaoru somehow. Maybe he touched an injured area?
“Ru?”
Another sob, followed by a sniffle. It made his heart drop. “Fuck. I’m an idiot, aren’t I?”
What? “What? What’s wrong?” He was crouching in front of the other before he could give it a second thought. The sight was… it was something he hadn’t seen in a while. His stomach was churning. “Kaoru. Why’re you saying that?”
“I just—” Kaoru paused, trying to breathe, to calm down. He had snot on his red nose, which Kojiro cleaned without a second thought. “I really thought things would change. I didn’t want— didn’t need to win, but shit— I don’t even love him anymore, I just— I wanted to prove that it could— that we could still be friends. That things could go back to when we were kids.”
Eat your fucking heart out, eh, Kojiro?
“Hey.” He didn’t know what to say. There was nothing to say. His friend, the man he’d been hopelessly head over heels for, got fucked over by the same person in the span of seven years, and was crying his eyes out, injured, in the shower. It brought upon him a horrible feeling of deja vu, and he couldn’t shake it away.
But he could help again. Just like when they were teenagers, directionless and feeling everything all at once. He’d do it over and over if it meant Kaoru would be okay.
His broad arms wrapped around the man, and he didn’t let go, albeit their uncomfortable position. One of his hands was rubbing his back in soothing, circling motions, with the other one hiding in his hair. He felt cold, his body shaking with each little sniffle and sob.
“It’s okay. You’re okay.” Kojiro wasn’t sure if he was heard. His voice wasn’t much louder than a small mumble. He let go of the hug and cupped Kaoru’s pale cheeks instead, being as mindful as possible of his bruises. His thumbs wiped away the tears as they continued falling, and a chuckle escaped him, feeling his own eyes getting watery. “Fuck him. He’s nothing but wasted potential. You’ve done so much without him and I know you can do so much more.”
If I’d known this is where we’d end up, I would have cut him off ten years ago. Completely separate myself from him and take the opportunity to tell you what I’ve always felt. I know I wouldn’t have stood a chance, I’ve never been what you crave. But I wouldn’t have been such a coward.
“You look so ugly when you cry.”
The two men laughed at the feeble joke. Kojiro didn’t expect Kaoru to do that, but he figured it would happen. Both of them had always had a problem with vulnerability.
“Like you look any better. Your face is the same color as your hair.” He wiped Kaoru’s tears once more, then leaned in, pressing a soft kiss to his forehead. Allowing himself just this one thing. “You don’t need someone like that to prove things can still be good, Ru. I believe in you.”
He could tell Kaoru didn’t fully believe the words. And that was okay. He’d be okay.
Kojiro pressed another kiss to his forehead, then his knuckles, praying above all else that the actions could convey everything he was trying to say, as well as everything he felt. I’m here for you. I love you. I love you.
It was back to washing his hair then. Neither of them spoke; there was no need. Kojiro washed, conditioned, detangled Kaoru’s hair, washed his bruises, helped him dry off, and guided him to the bedroom, offering fresh, warm clothes. He even blow-dried his hair and braided it, just like he used to do when they were teens, keeping it out of Kaoru’s face. Now it was just a matter of changing into some new clothes himself, and set up the couch…. His heart wanted to explode, beat straight out of his chest and straight into bed with him.
So he did. The night was full of mistakes and bad ideas, anyway; what’s one more? He lay on his side, watching as Kaoru attempted to do the same, settling about three-fourths of the way there. They were eyeing each other, both of them seeming like they had something to say.
Kaoru went first. “Thank you. You could have just left me back home, or at the emergency room. This means a lot to me.”
“Of course.” Kojiro got closer to him, allowing himself to push his hair back, over and over, creating a rhythm. “You mean a lot to me. I’ll help any way I can.”
“Langa completely destroyed you.”
“Youth is wasted on the young.”
Kaoru was holding Kojiro’s hand by then, guiding it to his cheek. Kojiro left it there, softly running his thumb along his thin lips.
“You know I’m beating his ass if he comes near you again, right?”
Kaoru smiled, tired. His eyes were halfway shut. “Nothing in the world would make me happier.”
Kojiro smiled back, the feeling of relief and comfort slowly returning. “Need a lullaby?”
A shake of the head signaling no, followed by a sleepy sigh and closed eyes. “Just stay here. The kids’ll be okay, yeah?”
“Yeah. Yeah, honey.” Honey. Sickly sweet. He pretended he didn’t notice the way his cheek felt hotter against his palm. “They’ll be okay. You’ll be okay.”
The way Kaoru kissed his thumb sent a jolt down his spine. A bad idea for another day, Kojiro decided.
He sighed again, keeping his own hand loosely wrapped around his arm. “Goodnight, Kojiro.”
“Goodnight, Ru.”
#aly writes#do not repost#do not reupload#ao3#matchablossom#sk8 the infinity#joe x cherry blossom#joe x cherry#bisexual joe#but also#closeted joe#i just think there should've been bigger repercussions to the cherry x adam race#i consider it a fucking plot hole#mans walked away unscathed basically#kojiro nanjo#kaoru sakurayashiki#fan fiction#joecherry
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All roads lead to Hell
MC gets kidnapped and has to make their way through Hell to reunite with everyone.
GN!reader x everyone (can be treated as platonic/romantic)
Trigger warnings for this chapter: none
I apologise for the quality of writing however this is a translated version of my fic.
If anyone is interested in that I was listening to Casey tells the truth, the whole Split soundtrack is my big inspiration for this story. I’d advise onto playing it in the background while reading.
Chapter 1 - Prolouge ⇒
A few candles lit up the room. The gentle light was adding to its already mysterious aura. Solomon’s dorm was filled with all kind of grimoires and spellbooks. The floor was covered with tons of torn-out pages and patterns drawn on a yellowish paper.
Trying out one spell after another MC seemed to grow more and more annoyed. The upcoming exam was one of the most important ones and Solomon’s constant teasing wasn’t the most helpful.
"Focus or you won’t get anything done, MC." The sorcerer stated while leaning against a wall. He wasn’t even trying to hide the amusement in his voice.
"I am focused" They mumbled irritated. It was their ninth try of casting this, so-called easy, spell. A marble laying on the table seemed to look at them pitifully. It was a one bastard piece of glass. Even more irritated MC moved their hand above it once again.
"Neque ultra intuebitur eum" they mumbled. The space around them seemed to start drawing energy towards their hand. A quiet electric buzz filled their ears and they could feel their cheeks heat up. But just as they were about to direct the energy towards the toy it would suddenly unload. The marble remained untouched, and MC could bet that if it was possible it’d poke its tongue at them. Or maybe even raise a very specific finger up. "Neque ultra intuebitur eum!"
Nothing.
"No! It’s impossible! It’s impossible and that’s it! You gave me a broken marble." They grunted and dramatically sat on a chair pouting.
Solomon snickered at them and approached the table. He muttered the words of the spell and the marble was gone immediately.
"Cheater. I bet it was enchanted or something."
"Maybe." He smirked. "Try again."
MC groaned under their breath but stood up again. The sorcerer walked up to them and placed his hand on their arm giving them a reassuring look. "That’s gonna be seriously lame if you fail again tho.”
They replied with a huff and tried to refocus. Closing their eyes, MC began collecting energy again. It was a weird feeling. Suddenly they’d notice that the whole room was in fact like a river full of it. Their task was to change its current toward themself. This spell didn’t require a lot of effort, only a bit of thought. Stronger spells could even sweep someone off with an uncontrolled current.
They’d never admit it but sorcerer’s touch was rather helpful. It made them feel grounded. Goosebumps rose on their hand. They cast the spell again.
"Lame." He chuckled.
"Huh?!” Their eyes shot open searching for the marble but the table was empty. They laughed and playfully punched his chest, making him laugh. "Asshole.”
Content, MC threw themself on the bed as a mark of their victory, Solomon was quick to follow.
"You realize that this was shit compared to regular magic?” watching them struggle was incredibly amusing to him, apparently.
"Like I don’t know" They frowned. He smiled in response and laid back next to them.
The silence of the room, moving flames of the candles and its overall aura was really comforting.
"You should be able to pass the exam tho" he mentioned.
"It’s a lot, you know? Everything." MC wondered.
"I know."
"I just can’t wrap my mind around it.” They began playing with their hair.
"You could do much more without a hassle.” He stated like it was something obvious and leaned on his elbows while looking at them with a smirk.
"Wow, thanks for being an asshole.” They muttered, the hair they were playing with fell on their face.
"A supportive asshole.”
"I’m not sure if I could do more.” They spoke trying to blow the curl off. Hesitation making its way in their voice. "It’s still too new and…”
”Overwhelming?”
"Yeah… Convincing someone that hell is real is one thing but throwing them inside is something else.” They followed gentle shadows of the flames on the ceiling with their eyes.
"Why? You’d prefer a flaming river and little red devils instead of your seven demon boyfriends?”
Both of them laughed at the image of the brothers' with spiked tails and tridents.
"No, I don’t think I would.”
Empty walls of RAD were enhancing every sound, making every single word echo for a few seconds before disappearing.
"MC, ya comin’ or what?" Mammon was standing at the end of the hallway talking with Beel.
"Just a second!" they screamed while taking stuff out of their locker and putting it in a bag. They were planning on returning to the House of Lamentation as soon as the school day was over to prepare for an exam. But their Devildom History textbook was nowhere to be seen. "Ugh, I left a textbook in the classroom. Wait for me, I’ll go get it!"
"Just hurry up! I’m not explainin’ to Lucifer why we’re late again!"
The palace garden was full of exotic flowers, nothing like what they’d seen before. The number of colours and shapes worked wonders, some of the plants were gently glowing and lighting up the eternal night. Some had spots and some seemed to move on their own. MC could swear that they could even hear glassy sounds of a few.
"No matter how many times I see those flowers they always amaze me.” Diavolo was lazily examining the garden grounds. "Some of them only grow here. I’m doing what I can to keep them from going extinct. The species come from all of the three realms. That’s why you can spot some familiar ones.” He explained. ”I’m hoping to replant them one day on its original grounds.”
"Thanks to magic?” MC was sipping on some tea.
"Thanks to a good gardener, actually.” Barbatos smiled.
"Oh.” Both men laughed at their confusion.
The quiet evenings in Lord Diavolo’s castle were a nice change from their usual ones. Their small chats quickly turned into a regular thing, always accompanied by a nice tea made by Barbatos.
"Magic definitely helps as well.”
The wind was shyly blowing between the palace columns. Moth-alike creatures were roaming the garden, their wings glooming in the soft darkness.
"I don’t think I can get used to it. The magic.”
"Maybe, it’s a good thing. Living in constant awe of something." The Demon Lord smiled and gave them a soothing look.
They quietly hummed in response.
Lucky for them, the classroom was open. They entered not bothering to turn the lights on. The lost textbook was waiting for them on their desk. A dark and empty classroom felt really heavy, MC grabbed the book and just as they were about to return to the hallway they noticed an envelope that must have been hidden underneath it.
"What? " They muttered. An elegant paper and a wax stamp made it look important. If not for their name written on the back they’d probably leave it alone in fear of getting hexed or pranked. Instead, curiosity made them break the stamp.
"Geez, what is taking ‘em so long?" Mammon huffed. They were gone for only a few minutes but making HIM wait was quite an offence.
"Maybe we should go and check on them" Beel mumbled from between his sandwich bites.
"Hm, to get lost on your way for a textbook. Dumb human." Mammon stated annoyed. He was energetically tapping his foot.
"Come on, they probably locked themself in the classroom or something."
As soon as MC fished the sheet of paper from inside the letter, they started shivering. Cold air began circling them, their vision fading. All the sounds of the world around them suddenly gone. Sudden exhaustion taking over them, an empty void. It was a calm, soothing sensation. Like falling asleep…
"It’s empty” Beel stated exiting another classroom.
"Ow, come on! They gotta be somewhere ‘ere!" anxiety was slowly making its way in Mammon’s voice.
"Try this one – he pointed at the door on the other side of the hallway."
"If they’re not in the…" a powerful charge of energy went off when he tried to reach for the doorknob leaving both demons in shock for a second.
"MC!" Mammon bailed inside an empty classroom.
Loud voices filling the House of Lamentation kept the atmosphere tense.
"So they forgot a textbook…" Lucifer tried to keep calm, but his furrowed brows showed how tense he actually was. "…and went to get it…"
"Yeah!"
"…alone." He shot his brother a disapproving look.
A guilty nod.
"So, you went after them and discovered a sudden burst of energy in the classroom." The whole situation was more than inconvenient. It was a tragedy to be specific. An exchange student disappearing on the grounds of the academy. The exact one who couldn’t protect themself from any magic. The foreign trace of a powerful spell didn’t make the situation any better. The eldest took a quick glance across the room.
"We found this." Beel pointed at their textbook laying on the table.
"Are you sure that they just didn’t go somewhere?" Satan uttered.
"I’m tellin’ ya how it went! They’re just gone like that!”
"They sure can’t be far, right?" Asmo’s question was left unanswered.
A motion of loud voices filled the room, everyone discussing what might have happened.
Lord Diavolo approached the table with a stern look on his face. If it was true that something happened to MC while they were at RAD then he was the one at fault for not keeping the academy grounds safe for them. He took the book and examined it. Devildom history. It had MC’s name written on the first page. Nothing appeared to be wrong with it. Just a regular textbook. "It’s just a textbook if anything had to do with their disappearance it couldn’t be it. Is Solomon on his way here?"
"Yes, I called him a while ago he should be here anytime." Lucifer confirmed.
It wasn’t even about the project anymore, MC was missing and it filled all of them with an unpleasant feeling of guilt.
"Can’t Barbatos use his powers and find them?”
The butler sadly shook his head.
What previously was a state of anxiety, now was slowly shifting into a panic whit every passing hour. As long as they were alone in Devildom, they definitely weren’t safe.
"Something happened to MC?!" Luke’s voice caught their attention.
Both angels and Solomon were standing in the entrance to the dining room, looking rather startled.
"We don’t know yet." Diavolo stated calmly.
They joined everyone by the table and Solomon took the textbook. He gave Diavolo a specific look and the demon lord nodded in response. He started studying it.
"Are they safe?! Why aren’t you worried?!" the young angel kept questioning.
"I’m sure that MC’s okay." Simeon’s white lies weren’t exactly suited for an angel.
"Of course, everyone is worried." Belphegor stated irritated. "That’s why we called you!"
Solomon tried to quiet out the rambling and kept examining the book, but just like Diavolo confirmed, there wasn’t anything extraordinary about it. That was unless he opened it and a single sheet of paper fell out.
#obey me! shall we date?#obey me!#obey me simeon#obey me luke#obey me#obey me lucifer#obey me leviathan#obey me diavolo#obey me barbatos#obey me mc#obey me mammon#obey me asmodeus#obey me satan#obey me solomon#obey me beelzebub#obey me belphegor
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The things that stay with us...
This was supposed to be my last BFSN-post while the show is still airing - the last BFSN-entry right before the series finale. But now it’s just... a FSN-post? Call it a Big-Hug-post. A Hug-Gratitude-post. Or whatever you prefer. Though in my heart Bellarke will ALWAYS be canon (and nothing can ever change that): They didn’t give it to us in the actual show (a show, whose narrative clearly told us otherwise all this time, but well.. whatever...). It’s too much honour to grace such a disappointing last season with a BFSN, dearies. (Or... even more so now? ;P ) So, call it what you like i guess! ;). Honestly, i didn’t want it to end.. just like that... without any last words to you, the kindest, most tolerant and beautiful minded fandom i’ve ever been (proudly!) a part of since 2016. (The selfie lies. It’s not current. I’m sorry, i can’t show you my face these days.. This is from the day just before it all went inevitably down with this season: BB’s death. So... enjoy: That smile’s for you, fam! ;) 2nd pic: The tattoo i got almost two years ago now, on Sept. 22nd 2018, and that never fails to remind me of my emotional support person and the fact, that after every “down” in life there will come an “up” again <3<3<3 )
What makes the whole experience of this last ever season of The 1OO for me so incredibly sad is.... Well, please bear with me if you will... My english STILL isn’t the very best... But i’m trying to put my feelings into words:
Last year, when we got the news that S7 would be the final season, i DREADED this moment. I was AFRAID of this last day (and the hours) before the actual finale. And why so? Bc I am a person, who’s an incredible loser when it comes to let go of the things i love so dearly. Like The 1OO. I... in times i was OBSESSED with it, with the story, with the chacracters and the way they’ve been written, so credible, so tangible in their actions, nothing was just bad or good and even the villains actions had been understandable to some extend. It was amazing! I felt with almost every character! I LOVED it. (And to be very clear here: I’ll never STOP loving The 100′s 6 seasons, that are still existing for me!)
But what i wanted to say is: I dreaded the moment when l would have to let it go. THat inevitable moment, when this show with all its storylines and characters, that have been a part of my life for the last years and that i love so dearly, really ends. Forever. It would end and i wouldn’t be ready to let go, bc it means the world to me. Bc it changed me in more than just one way - no, even better, bc it made me want to change myself! “To do better...” *ugly crying...* THis show SAVED me in a way and in a time, where i was in a very dark place in life, in a very dark mind space (constant illnesses, termination of my job due to these illnesses, an ugly lawsuit etc. pp) , this show and its actors, especially one Robert Alfred Morley (yes), who helped me to look at myself and my mental insecurities and illness from a whole new point of view. I wasn’t ashamed of myself anymore. I felt... relieved. Understood. I even felt kind of loved for what i am, even with my anxieties. (There may or may not come a point or even a person in everyones life, that helps to develop this new kind of view on themselves. And for me this person was and always will be Bob Morley. And whatever happens, i’ll always love him for his open- and kindness and be thankful for his inspiration. I still call myself lucky to have talked with him a couple of times. I treasure these moments. Always.)
So, i was AFRAID of this day, when this all would come to an end. I KNEW it would wreck me, i would be devestated, i would be so incredibly sad, that i won’t be able to put it into words.
And here i am now. I AM sad. I AM devestated. But for so very different reasons that i could never imagine in my wildest nightmares... This last season... Season 7--- no i won’t start again. Not AGAIN. But... just that: What they’ve been creating for us here... it really overshadowed my joy of watching this show throughout this last season, yes even BEFORE that horrible murder of my all time fave and comfort character. I take back whatever i said about S6 or even S5. THIS... S7 was the season, that didn’t feel like the show i fell in love with anymore. Though changes CAN be refreshing and exciting... these changes haven’t been that for me.
Look. The thing is: Even WITH Bob’s request for time off and everything... There would’ve been PLENTY options for the writers to actually make it all make kind of sense! THEY COULD’VE DONE IT BETTER! If they’d really wanted to, that is... And here’s the point: I think they didn’t WANT it. For whatever reasons, whatever happened bts, they decided to do it like they did. And no-one’s able to understand their choices or the characters anymore - those characters we used to know so well, these characters i felt with over the course of so many seasons - who i could understand! EVEN THE VILLAINS! And now... look at the thanks we got. I can’t understand shit anymore when it comes to S7. Bc nothing makes sense. When i see even the GREATEST meta-writers among us surrender in their posts - than it’s really sad times for this fandom...
It’s not even just about Bellarke anymore. Sure, i AM disappointed that they’re not canon now. But then they shouldn’t have arranged the whole story around these two! “The backbone of the whole story”!!! I am laughing. In that case S7 was SPINELESS! Let me tell you. Everyone’s just... flailing around... great little side storylines, but somehow... disconnected from each other and all over the place. That’s how it felt for me to watch this season. And i’m feeling so exhausted by now... I never stopped hoping... I always thought, at some point it would make sense. I’ve read all your great metas AND I WANTED TO BELIEVE! It made perfect sense! (I seriously felt like Fox Mulder from time to time this season... and the lack of sense in the storyline as well as the complete absence of my personal faves (yes i include Clarke (Eliza) here, bc heck, she was so sidelined this season too, self inflicted or not) - all these things had been the “UFO’s or aliens i was hoping to see” one day... Guess i was wrong.)
I’m babbling... Sorry. But it will be for the last time in that kind of form. Promise.
At the end of the day (at the end of all things.. sigh, Frodo... i see you... *blinks back tears*) I am so glad that you’re all here with me, in the same boat. That I’m not alone feeling this kind of lost and baited and betrayed. Bc whatever you like to call it: The narrative promised us otherwise. Did JRott OWE us canon Bellarke? NO. Of course not. But HIS STORY did. The story he’d been telling us for SIX GD YEARS! THAT is what makes me so mad. But most of the time (and despite the selfie above) i’m just sad. Sad and disappointed. I know it will pass one day. And that i’ll find joy in watching S1-4, even S5 except for a couple of scenes, and certain episodes of S6 again. But now is not the day. Even IF they’ll give these characters a “happy ending” in some transcended form or whatever, in the afterlife maybe,... S7 is ruined for me. It wasn’t even a bliss for me before, but it was certainly ruined after they killed “The Heart” - pointlessly (THIS is what will haunt me even years from now..).
Today is the day for saying goodbye. It aches my heart, that we’ll have to do it the way we have to now. But at least we are together. So let’s raise a glass in honour of all the hours of joy and excitement this show brought us over the years, maybe even the tears and laughter, let’s raise a glass for the outstanding performances of the cast and the great storylines some writers developed for us. I am thankful beyond words. Let’s raise a glass to this awesome, talented fandom! I’ve met and talked to dozens of you guys througout the years, and it had always been a pleasure! I hope we’ll stay in touch! <3<3<3 And last but not least: Let’s raise a glass for Kass Morgan. This is HER baby in more than just one way. Without her vision... there wouldn’t have been a show. Or even Bellarke. CANON Bellarke, that is! ;) And i LOVE it!
These are the things that stay with us, these are the things we will remember.
So, have fun with the finale tonight guys! Or should i say: Good luck? ;) I won’t watch now. I haven’t watched since 7x13, and i won’t start again tonight. Not even for the finale. BUT... i’ll probably do it some day in the future. I’m still kind of curious after all. And there are still some characters i want to know how it ends for them. It‘s just... i don’t want to support any ratings. I don’t want to support JRott anymore. But i’ll probably get back to it - if what y’all will write about it afterwards looks promising or not... ;)
See you on the other side!
(Tags under the cut)
Hugs and love to you, dear fam! Tagging @together-is-my-favourite-place @natassakar @geekyogicheese @immortalpramheda @carrieeve @bellamyblake @angelbellamy @burninghoneyatdusk @iwearplaids @wankadi @katersann @nvermindiseeyou @ruggedmurphy @clarkgriffon @poppykru @broashwhat @malclmbright @kizo2703 @cominguproses13x @clarkeindra @tenmonologues @shialablunt @sometimesrosy @zavens @wonderingwhyy @charmainediyoza @the-suns-also-rise @lee-em-dee @bellamynochillblake @junebugninja @songhyeri @underbellamy @talistheintrovert @jeanie205 @bellamys11thfreckle @doontpanic @clarkegriffinblake @goddess-clarke @eyessharpweaponshot @hostagetakerandhistraitor @infp-with-all-the-feelings @theatre-steph @historyofbellarke @as-inevitable-as-morning @bisexualbellamyblake @little-oxford-st @delicatebluebirdruins in no particular order (i am so sorry in advance, if i should’ve forgotten someone... >.<), and yes, i include you too @merlination my Danny, bc without you, i wouldn’t have started watching The 1OO in the first place... ;)
#the 100#bfsn#bellarke fam selfie night#bellarke#bellamy blake#clarke griffin#bob morley#eliza taylor#the 100 cast#the 100 season 7#series 7#through the seasons#finale#series finale#final episode#episode#the last war#bellamy x clarke#clarke x bellamy#anti jroth#tattoo#selfie#my edit#my posts#my pics#my photos#mine#photos#the 100 fam#the 100 fandom
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globe anon again!! sorry for requesting a lot haha i just rlly love your writing! could i get some quality fluffy content of s/o forcing byakuya to spend a whole day with her doing ‘peasant things’ (such as going to mcdonalds or taking public transportation, etc)?? and byakuya not really wanting to do any of this but going along (very pessimistically) because he loves his s/o djsakgk tYSM!!!
Hey lovely! I love this request sm, and I tried my best with it because Byakuya is one of my favs,,, but it ended up with mostly McDonalds IM SORRY FORGIVE ME
Remember to prioritize yourself, health, and wellbeing lovelies!! 💗 - Mod Mikan who has class in like 5 minutes
Byakuya And His S/O Doing “Peasant Things”
I don’t know how you managed to convince Byakuya to follow you around all day, but I guess if you can manage to steal the Byakuya Togami’s heart, you can do anything! It’ll take a lot of patience and time for it to happen, but when it does, it’s hilariously amazing.
You were quickly slipping on your shoes to head out when you heard someone clear their throat behind you.
“Hmm? Oh, Kuya! You finally came out of that stuffy office of yours!”
“For the last time, (Name), do not call me Kuya,” Byakuya sighed as he adjusted his glasses. “I just wanted to know where you were going.” (Yea… acting like he totally didn’t just want to spend some with you, drinking expensive tea and reading together. 🥺)
“Just heading out for some errands, Bya,” you hummed as you pulled on your jacket.
“Errands? Are you referring to those peasant activities you take part in?”
“Hey, they aren’t peasant activities! It’s things normal people do!”
“You are the least normal person I’ve met.”
You stuck your tongue out at him as you huffed. “You know, you should follow me around first and then decide whether I partake in peasant activities. You might enjoy yourself!” You knew that Byakuya wouldn’t be caught doing such things, but it was fun to tease your easily irritable boyfriend.
“I’ll just go drink the milkshake Makoto and Kyoko recommended to me by myself then, Kuya.”
“...Makoto and Kyoko?”
“Yup! They recommended me a yummy drink from this place we eat at frequently together! But you never want to come!” you pouted. “Please, can you come just this once? I’ll be there so you won’t be bored, ya know!”
“Fine… only this once though. And you better not tell-”
“Alrighty! Let us depart at once!” you cheered, grabbing the end of his sleeve, and dragging him out the door. Even though he never showed it, your lover had a soft spot for you and his friends.
It wasn’t until you two were walking side by side that you realized how out of place you looked. Byakuya was clad in his normal attire - a crisp, elegant suit, which was… not very normal for other people. What’s more was that your boyfriend was taller than most, and that someone as simple as you were walking with him like it was nothing. You were a bit embarrassed by all the stares you got but Byakuya looked like he didn’t care.
“Oh, we’re here!” you smiled, standing in front of the familiar place with the big yellow ‘M.’
“(Name)... please don’t tell me you took me here.”
“Don’t worry Kuya, McDonalds’ is pretty good. I bet even someone like you have had it at least once, right?”
“... I’m leaving.”
“Oh God, you never had McDonalds before?? *The* Byakuya Togami hasn’t experienced the wonders of fast food? We have to fix that right now!” you once again dragged a very reluctant and stiff looking Byakuya into the building. Thankfully, it was mostly empty save for a few customers. The place was as you remembered it - napkins laid on the floor messily, wet tables, the menu displayed brightly. You knew your partner disliked PDA, so you opted to just stay close to him so he didn’t disappear on you.
“You see anything you like, Kuya?”
You glanced over and it seemed as though Byakuya was busy casting one of his “You’re inferior to me” looks to everyone in the restaurant.
“Right… I’ll order for the both of us then.” You decided to get the frappe for yourself. Would Byakuya like the black coffee? But that was so boring, he drank that too much anyway! So you decided to order him a mocha instead. And some fries as well, you hadn’t had those in so long,,,
Your order came quickly and you excitedly took out your wallet to pay, when Byakuya stopped you and handed the cashier his credit card instead. (He loves you too much and also has too much pride to ever let you pay. And he just likes *flexing* in front of commoners apparently, you’re not sure whether this is intentional or not.)
The both of you walked over to the tables, albeit Byakuya was more slow, not the fondest of the surroundings and the caution wet floor signs.
“Come on, Bya! You gotta try the fries before they get cold!”
“(Name), I am not sitting… on that.”
“Don’t worry bro, I got you,” you draped your jacket over the chair and beckoned for him to sit down.
He grimaced and sat down in his normal sitting position, arms and legs crossed. “Being around the 99% of the failing population makes me physically ill, (Name.)”
“Shh… and just enjoy your mocha and try these fries man.”
He sighed and hesitantly reached for a fry, inspecting it and placing it into his mouth. You looked at him with stars in your eyes.
“It’s not bad, for peasant food-”
“Really??! We got em everyone! Byakuya admitted McDonalds-”
“I don’t know why or how I put up with you for so long…”
“Haha, because you love me right! Come on, try the mocha now!” After some more encouragement from you, you convinced your lover to try the drink, to which he started listing all of the things wrong about it. You managed to listen to him critique the whole place, how he didn’t expect much from a place commoners frequent, while you sipped on your frappe.
“Ah, wasn’t that so relaxing, Kuya? Spending some quality time with you is truly therapeutic,” you giggled, retrieving your jacket while Byakuya looked at you like you were crazy.
“Why do you always wear that one jacket every time you go out? You have plenty of other options at home.”
“Wow, you paid attention to what I was wearing?”
Byakuya smirked, “Naturally, I know everything that you do.” (His way of saying he cares about you a lot.)
“Well, this was the jacket you gave me on our first date! It was cold and you let me borrow your jacket… I didn’t know you had it in you to be romantic!”
Shock quickly came and left Byakuya’s face. “So you remember that as well…” he looked to the side so you couldn’t see his face. (He was def blushing a bit 🥺.)
“Come on, Kuya! There’s more peasant activity we have to take part in right now!”
You later dragged Byakuya into a bus, and he tries to pay and then you explain that you need to have a Metro Card or coins in order to pay. Therefore you had to pay for the two of you and he never felt so annoyed in his life.
(After the two of you get home, you spread the news to Makoto about your “date” with Byakuya, who spreads it to Aoi and Yasuhiro who can’t stop laughing. They never let him live it down and now Byakuya refuses to go anywhere near fast food. But he still loves you so much, so he still lets you cuddle with him while he reads 🥺.)
I’m sorry to everyone who had to read this, idk what I’m doing.
#danganronpa#danganronpa x reader#byakuya togami#byakuya togami x reader#byakuya x reader#danganronpa headcanons#danganronpa imagines#trigger happy havoc x reader#thh x reader#byakuya togami headcanons#byakuya togami imagines#story petals
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Luck Of The Unit - Day 1 prompt from @wayhavenmonthly: Compliment
Rating: teen & up Pairing: farah&m!oc (tanner drake) Word Count: 957 Warnings: some swearing A/N: yeah, yeah it’s not march yet for most of you. but you know what it’s the 1st here so bugger it, here we go! this one’s for @mrshauville who requested some farah love for day 1. also i have no idea what to do with tags for farah&tanner stuff so i’ve just used the general tag list - let me know if you’re not on it but you’d like to be for these 2! i have some (not all) of the prompts mostly worked out, but if you have any that you’d like to see written specifically for any of my oc’s and their li’s or bff’s, let me know and i’ll see what i can do!
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“Knock knock, gorgeous.”
Farah glances up from where she’s playing a game on her phone to see Tanner leaning in her doorway.
“How long have you been here?” she asks, locking her phone and setting it down on her bed beside her.
“About an hour, I’m heading out now,” he answers, and she rolls her eyes and tuts at him.
“And you didn’t tell me because…?”
“Because Blondey’s had me in the training room the whole time.”
She casts her eyes over him, only just noticing that his hair’s a little messier than usual and there’s a light sheen of sweat covering his face.
“Have fun?”
He smirks and gives a small shrug, “I got to kick his ass so, yeah.”
“You could stick around for a while, you know? You don’t have to leave as soon as he’s done with you every time.”
“Not ready to see the end of me yet, huh?”
“You’re just about the only fun person who comes here, so not quite,” she answers with a heavy sigh, glancing back up at him with a slight pout on her face.
He nods and steps into her room, making his way over to sit down beside her on her bed.
“I feel you, you might be the best person I’ve met since being in this town.”
Her face brightens and she elbows him lightly in the ribs. “Tanner Drake, did you just give me a compliment?”
“Don’t get used to it,” he grins at her.
“What about Morgan? From what I hear you’ve been having quite a lot of fun with her.”
“From what you hear?”
Farah lifts both hands to tap her ears and winks at him, “I’ve heard a lot. Some of it’s quite frankly disturbing.”
His grin widens and he shrugs, completely unashamed. Somewhat proud of himself instead, it would seem.
“That’s not fun,” he points out, and she frowns at him.
“So what is it?”
“Fucking.” He answers pointedly, and she wrinkles her nose at him. “She’s a bitch when she’s got her clothes on, though.”
She narrows her eyes and points a finger at him, “you watch what you say about her, mister.”
“She’s a bitch to me when she’s got her clothes on,” he clarifies.
“You’re a prick to her when you’ve got your clothes on.”
Tanner pauses for a minute before shrugging again, “touché. It’s beside the point though, I like you better.”
She grins and leans over to nudge him with her shoulder. “And I didn’t even have to get naked.”
She knows that this, whatever it is, between Tanner and Morgan is more than what either of them are willing to admit that it is, but who is she to meddle?
Who is she kidding, of course she’s going to meddle. But there’s a time and a place, and when he’s in a relatively good mood after an hour long training session with Adam is not the time.
“Well, come on. Since you’re being generous with the compliments today, let me have ‘em.”
“Are you fishing?”
“Absolutely. Tell me how amazing I am.”
He laughs and throws an arm around her shoulders, giving her a light squeeze as he answers, “you’re just as amazing as you think you are, Farah.”
She cannot for the life of her imagine why Adam and Nate seem to dislike Tanner so much. At least not until she remembers that he frequently goes out of his way to antagonise both of them as often as he can. Morgan too. She may be the only person that he doesn’t deliberately try to piss off, and she’s not exactly sure why but she’s definitely not going to question it. She’s heard the stories, she’s seen the uncertain looks Adam and Nate have given each other when Tanner starts to get angry. She has no desire to deliberately put herself on the wrong side of him for no good reason.
Maybe she would be a little more annoyed about the way he treats and talks about Morgan, if not for the fact that she says much worse about him and at times treats him appallingly herself. They’re as bad as each other, but for some reason it seems to work for them and even somehow seems to increase their attraction for each other, so Farah sees no reason to get into the middle of that either.
“Damn right I am, and I’ll throw hands at anyone who says otherwise,” she agrees with a determined nod, and he raises an eyebrow at her.
“Will you?”
“Well, no. But that’s what I have you for.”
He nods and holds a fist out for her to bump before getting to his feet, straightening down the front of his jacket.
“Anytime,” he agrees before heading to the door.
“You’re not so bad either, you know,” she calls after him, and he turns to face her.
“Not so bad?” he repeats incredulously. “A glowing endorsement.”
“What do you want from me? You’re a dick to everyone else, saying that you’re as amazing as me might be too much of a stretch.”
“Fuck you,” he flips her off playfully and she wrinkles her nose at him again.
“No, thank you.”
“I wasn’t offering.”
“Sure you weren’t. You wish you could get all this,” she gestures down to herself with both hands and he fake gags, holding one hand over his mouth and one to his stomach as though he’s suddenly fallen ill.
“Please,” is the only response she gets from him before he turns and leaves her alone again.
He really is a dick. But he might also be one of her favourite people, not that she’d ever tell him that. His ego’s big enough as it is.
--
tags (let me know if you’d like to be added or removed): @admdmrtn @masonsfangs @oxjenayxo @mmerengue @agentsunshine @bravomckenzie @freckles-spangledvampire @mistyeyedbi @kelseaaa @detectivewiseman @amlovelies @forestcreatures @maraudern05
#lucky21#luck of the unit#the wayhaven chronicles#farah&tanner#farah hauville#tanner drake#kat writes
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Roadhouse Tweets. It’s okay if, in Chad’s opinion, they were not about Destiel. An Opinion Piece.
I think the roadhouse tweets were fun, but didn't necessarily have to do with Destiel, though I liked the fandom's DeanCasWedding tweets, on Valentine's Day.
People saying "Chad, you could've ignored this..." in response to fans asking/telling him to say it was a Destiel wedding would have been as equally upset, if he had ignored tweets. Then, people would be like "If you promote Destiel, unfollow me. Block me. If you promote Destiel, don't respond..." So they have something to share on their TL like "Guys, omigod, look at that they confirmed..." Similar to “Jensen! Don’t reply to my tweet if Destiel is real!” He doesn’t live on Twitter like I do, so it’s more likely than not he’s not going to respond, no matter what his opinion. It’s kind of pathetic seeing fans go that far, to get validation. And when actors do pay attention to fans and what they’re saying on social media, and share a tweet or a vid to voice their take on the show, it’s not necessarily bullying! It’s interacting with fans, it’s them expressing their views on the show, like we do ours. And “irked” is not an offensive word, for fuck’s sake! If that word literally made people cry.... 🤦♀️
It's a fic show. Fictional characters. The actors no longer film episodes, & the fact that any cast members are interacting with fans at all with the show wrapped and the set torn up and all that, is amazing. Sam's tweets rubbed me the wrong way, but I don't see Chad being a villain, in all of this. He did something fun, interacted with fans, now some entitled fans are seeing an opportunity to be told they're right or within the right, all the time.
When an actor expresses an opinion that differs from yours, they aren't bullying you, necessarily. Even when people are wrong and you really are right, they aren’t bullying you by disagreeing with you or being ignorant of the facts. So, it’s not a reason to cry. I promote the Destiel supporters of the fandom, and loved that the wedding happened. I love all of the DeanCas fan art. But people needing the actors validating every little thing they think, is weird.
A fan says "They can't take that away from us, it happened and that's..." Great! But seconds later "I'm crying. Why are they hurting us? I told the actors to tweet that their twitter is all about Destiel, & they said it isn't. This is so hurtful. They're bullying me..."
What Destiel represents is beautiful, but there are too many Annie Wilkes, in the fandom. To wrap this up, calm down. Enjoy Destiel, but don't force others to think exactly like you do. If you're right all the time, you shouldn't feel the need to have celebrities validate your opinions 24/7.
I'm sorry if your parents raised you wrong and led you to believe that you are the good guy in everything you do (we are all bullies) and that they carried you around on a pillow your whole life, because now you think that all others you look up to or like, are supposed to agree with every little thing you say in order for them to be good or “worth your time,” and that's not how things work.
“He’s doing it for likes...” And you’re not? Not a single one of you? Please. And after he loses thousands of followers, how many more will we still have, than you?
I suggest ALL SPN fans read or watch Stephen King's 'Misery.' Same with ‘Stepford Wives,’ but mostly ‘Misery’ (if you haven’t already). Be well.
P.S. - When an actor says they improvised a line or worked with the directors and writers, that does not mean they wrote the episode. Someone said “Misha wrote 15x18...” No he didn’t. Bobo Berens did. Story Editor credit goes to Jeremy Adams.
P.P.S. - And because it’s still annoying, to me...The IMDB rating for 15x20 is invalid, because a bunch of children got together and said “Leave multiple one star reviews under different account names! That’ll show ‘em..” I didn’t like the finale and it wasn’t my favorite episode (loved the opening scene and the dog, though), but honey...that’s cheating. That’s MAGA-behavior. You can’t point at the IMDB review and go “See?! I’m right!”
#Samantha Ferris#Chad Lindberg#SPN Family#Roadhouse Tweets#Fandom Drama#SPN#Supernatural#Misery#Stepford Wives#Misha Collins#Jensen Ackles#fan interaction#crossing the line#opinions#fiction vs reality#destiel#deancaswedding#annie wilkes
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Bet You Look Good On The Dancefloor (14/14) (Branjie) (and background everyone) - Ortega
a/n: WAAH the end is here!! thank u to everyone who’s ever liked, reblogged or commented on this, it means the world!! hope u enjoy the final chapter! it’s finale time babeyyy
fic summary: Strictly Come Dancing enters its 18th series and its producers, after being goaded by a rival dance show on its inclusivity, commission it to be an all-female cast. Unlike Akeria who’s just here to bone her potential dance partner, dancer Vanessa is ready to act like a professional.
And then TV presenter Brooke Lynn walks into the rehearsal room.
*****
12th December, 2020
The glitterball is casting a thousand mirrors onto the dancefloor and the bodies of the girls around her as Vanessa moves gracefully across the ballroom, twirl, twirl, twirl, STOP, kick-and-kick, kick-and-kick. She feels like a little clockwork doll as she completes each move perfectly in sync with Crystal and Courtney beside her, and with all the lights beaming down on her and the knowledge she’s got her girlfriend out there watching her it’s as if she’s made of a million diamonds.
“All these bad times I’m goin’ through, just dance…got canned heat in my heels tonight baby…”
On the last beat she freezes back to back against Phi Phi on her other side, and as the pros all hold their positions the celebrities in the audience cheer and screech and clap loudly for them. Vanessa supposes it’s weird to still be calling them the celebrities; they’re part of the huge big Strictly family now, and it’s so sad that in a matter of hours the whole experience will be over for another year and they’ll have to say goodbye to each other. Well. In theory they will, but for the endless amount of them who seem to have struck up relationships over the course of the show not much will probably change.
Melting out of their poses, the dancers all laugh, hug and hi-five each other, glad they managed to do so well in the dress rehearsal. As they all walk back over to the seats in the audience Vanessa sees Brooke’s bright smile and twinkling eyes as she puts her hands together in a series of tiny little claps just for her.
“You were so good out there! Well done,” she gasps encouragingly, holding her arms out to her for a hug which Vanessa gladly accepts.
It’s crazy how Brooke’s arms have become such a familiar and comforting place for Vanessa, and the feeling of her girlfriend all warm and soft around her makes her feel like her stomach’s full of butterflies. As the hug breaks, Vanessa tilts her chin up to kiss Brooke once, twice, three times, the pair of them smiling at each other all goofy and dumb and happy. They never really announced their relationship to the other pros (apart from to Monique and Akeria, of course, who received a number of loud voicenotes from Vanessa in the Uber back from Brooke’s the morning after she’d stayed over). To their credit, the other girls have barely batted an eye to the occasional coupled-up displays on show; apart from Crystal squealing and gushing about how cute they are and Jan giving Vanessa a sneaky wink and mouthing a told you so.
Vanessa doesn’t mind, though. Being with Brooke feels like being on a boat in a harbour; calm, anchored, safe. They’ve only really been girlfriends for a week but in Vanessa’s eyes it feels like a lot longer. If she’s been worried about not seeing Brooke after they were kicked out of the competition then Brooke has done everything she can to assuage those fears. On Tuesday they went for late-night drinks at a quiet bar in the middle of buttfuck nowhere to make extra sure there would be no press lingering about. On Wednesday Vanessa had picked Brooke up from filming and Brooke had introduced her to her co-presenter Nina, who’d gasped and hugged her and said she’d heard so much about her (which in turn made Brooke blush, to Vanessa’s delight). And on Friday Vanessa had stayed at Brooke’s again ahead of their busy day today, and they’d made cookies together and taken them in for everyone to snack on during the dress run. It all feels like paradise, the best kind of dream that Vanessa wants to stay in forever.
“I don’t think I’ll ever stop bragging about how my girlfriend is the best pro dancer on the whole show,” Brooke says proudly, Vanessa going all giggly and flattered in her arms. Just then, Jackie leans forward from the row of seats behind them.
“Aw, don’t tell me you and Jan have been having an affair?!” she teases lazily, and Brooke makes a childish face at her as she sits down on her own seat, dragging Vanessa with her onto her lap.
“I said best pro dancer, not best crier,” Brooke deadpans, then flinches and gives a cry as she’s hit on the back of the head with an empty plastic water bottle. As Vanessa howls with laughter, she turns around to see who the culprit is- an incredibly unamused Jan.
“Hey, you two cried when you left too!”
“Only cried because I thought I’d never get to grind against Brooke again,” Vanessa jokes, getting a laugh from the two girls behind her and a long-suffering glare from Brooke. As if to punctuate her point Vanessa wiggles a little in her lap, and the glare turns challenging with a minute raise of Brooke’s eyebrows. If Vanessa has anything to do with it she’ll be paying for that later. She can’t wait.
“Are we talking about grinding against our girls?” Crystal asks inquisitively from a few seats along. “Gigi’s impossible. Her hipbones are like razor blades.”
“Hey, I’m not that skinny!” Gigi objects from beside her, Crystal placating her by taking her hand and kissing it as the other girls laugh. Vanessa’s not sure when those two actually got their shit together, but she’s glad they did. She knows how much Crystal had been crushing on Gigi, and she’s happy that another set of girls get to be happy too.
“You done with your fitting then, Crys?” Vanessa asks. She knows all the finalists got called to wardrobe straight after their rehearsal, and it still looks as if Akeria and Monique aren’t done yet.
“Yeah. The skirt is so long, though, God knows how I’m gonna dance in it.”
“How’re you feeling, Gigi?” Jan asks politely, the finalist going vaguely green beside her partner.
“Like I drank a bucket of cold sick.”
“How poetic,” Crystal rolls her eyes. “You’ll be fine! Better than fine. You’ll be amazing. You’ve got me!”
“That’s the part I’m worried about,” Gigi deadpans, and as the girls roar with laughter Vanessa catches Gigi reassuring Crystal that she was only kidding, kissing her cheek for good measure.
Vanessa cranes her neck, searching the studio. When her eyes don’t fall on the people she’s looking for, she turns to Gigi and Crystal again. “Hey, you know if Kiki and Monique are done yet?”
“Nah. Still there,” Gigi says, sipping from her water bottle on one hand with her other still curled round Crystal’s.
“Right. I’m gonna go wish ‘em good luck in case I don’t see them before the show,” Vanessa says decisively, making to stand up. Brooke pulls her back into her lap, fixing her with a pout and a kissy face.
“Needy,” Vanessa teases, before pressing three little kisses to her lips that the other girls either simper, fake-vomit or wolf-whistle at.
It’s not hard to find Akeria and Monique; they’re both still in wardrobe with their partners, although Monique looks as if she is done and Akeria is dressed in her showdance dress, a riot of silver and gold sequined fringing. Asia’s is matching, and they both look like identical twins as they’re prodded with pins and needles and measured with lengths of tape.
“Wow, you two look stunnin’,” Vanessa says by way of a greeting, to which Akeria’s face lights up in delight.
“Hey boo!” she beams, holding her arms out for a hug and then forgetting she’s practically rendered immobile for the time being.
Monique greets her too, but she’s muted and quiet as she sits on the small sofa beside Monet. She looks nervous. It’s rare that Monique gets nervous. In all the time Vanessa’s known her and all the contests they’ve competed in together, she has hardly ever seen Monique look anything other than 100% sure of herself.
“How you all feelin’?” Vanessa asks, laughing as Asia sticks her tongue between her teeth and makes a noise like a big wet fart.
“Nervous as hell. I’m just gonna go out there and have a good time, though. If we win, we win, and if we don’t, well…the public have no taste.”
Akeria points at her in approval and agreement, and Vanessa’s gaze turns to Monet.
“I’m just excited! I’m not ready for the whole thing to be over. Think I’m just gonna go out an’ have fun, like Asia. But I’ve not been able to get a word out of this one all day,” she gently nudges Monique with her knee, threads her arm around her waist. “And y’know, usually I’d be overjoyed about getting a bit of peace, but it’s unnerving. I think she’s more nervous than I am.”
Monique looks up at Monet with a small smile, but her brow’s still furrowed in worry.
“I just don’t wanna let you down. You work so hard every damn day an’ you deserve the win so much. I mean what if I do fuck somethin’ up? Forget a step or do somethin’ wrong?”
“Monique,” Vanessa interjects, her lip curling in disbelief. “You are a literal dance champion. You have three trophy cabinets at your family home- don’t deny it, I’ve seen ‘em. You’re a professional dancer, for Christ’s sake! Why are you so nervous about this in particular?”
“Because she wants to win it for her boo,” Akiera raises her eyebrows at the pair of them on the sofa, and Vanessa doesn’t miss the way Monique grows all bashful and Monet develops a slightly smug smile.
“That ain’t it at all! It’s just…it’s my first final, and yeah I’m nervous, and not gonna lie, I wanna win. And…” Monique trails off as she looks at Monet. “…okay, I kind of am putting myself under more pressure because it’s you.”
Vanessa and Akeria cast each other a knowing glance, one that lets Akeria communicate to her just how correct she was.
“Babe,” Monet chuckles, pulling Monique closer. “I got six Brit awards, two MOBOs, two number ones an’ a top five album. Winning tonight would be nice, but…there’s more important things to me, like the pair of us havin’ fun together. Besides. I already won when I got partnered with you, so.”
Monet tails off, a little embarrassed at how soppy she’s got in front of the others, but Vanessa thinks it’s worth it when she sees how Monique lights up at her words.
“Go on, kiss her. It’ll make Akeria sick, an’ that’s funny,” Vanessa teases, and as Akeria rolls her eyes at her Monique peppers Monet’s face with grateful kisses.
“Now listen,” Vanessa speaks again, her tone sincere as she steps forwards and takes her friend’s hands. “If I don’t see you both before the final…go get that glitterball, okay? Do it for all three of us, we said one of us would take it. Have fun, do your best. But whatever happens, I’m so proud of you both.”
“Shut up. You’re gonna make me cry,” Akeria says stoically, but Vanessa knows there’s love behind it.
“Love you, V,” Monique smiles tearfully, untangling herself from Monet’s arms and moving to hug her.
“Fuck it,” Akeria shrugs, gingerly putting her arms around the pair of her friends.
Vanessa hopes she’s conveying with her hug just how much she loves her sisters, how desperately proud of them she is and how much luck she’s wishing them both. It’s so crazy for her to think about the three of them, in their late teens with their hair scraped back into tight buns and too much makeup on their face, meeting for the first time at the tower ballroom all those years ago. Now Akeria and Monique are in the final, and Vanessa gets to watch them.
She can’t quite believe this is her life.
In the green room all the other girls are chatting excitedly, happy they’re not under any pressures tonight other than to do the group dances well, have fun, and cheer loudly for their friends. Some of the girls are doing some last-minute touch-ups at the mirrors and some have spilled out onto the floor, surrounded by boxes of pizza that remind Vanessa of how hungry she is and make her stomach rumble. Her eyes eventually land on Brooke, tucked up in a corner eating a slice of pepperoni and busy scrolling her phone which is plugged into the wall. She’s wearing one of the dressing gowns that production provides them with, clearly too cold in her opening dance outfit. The sight makes Vanessa’s heart melt a little bit and she crosses the room to meet her.
“Hey! Woah, watch!” Brooke laughs, as Vanessa wraps her whole body around her- arms around Brooke’s head, thighs around her waist- and clings to her like a koala. “You’ll get pizza grease on your dress and then costume will shout at you.”
“You looked cold,” Vanessa mutters against her hair, by way of explanation.
It’s too late when she notices Brooke editing the photo for her Instagram story- Vanessa’s head resting on top of hers and Brooke pulling a silly face for the selfie.
Sleepy baby ahead of the finale, Brooke types, and Vanessa’s heart grows all warm.
“That’s gonna raise some suspicion, y’know,” Vanessa smirks, tapping her nail against the word baby as she releases her girlfriend from the full-body hug and settles herself down beside her.
“What? You are a sleepy baby. It’s just a fact,” Brooke shrugs, making Vanessa laugh. Brooke’s reaction makes her consider something.
“Hey, d’you think we should wait til we’re asked about us to say that we’re together? Y’know, in like, an interview? Or should we make like…an announcement?” she asks her, Brooke snorting at her last sentence.
“An announcement! We’re not the royal family, baby, let’s chill,” she taps her on the nose, and Vanessa huffs beside her.
“Well! Our fans might still want to know. I don’t know if you’ve looked at either of our comment sections lately, but they’re both full of kids wanting to know if there’s anything going on between us.”
“I think wait to be asked,” Brooke shrugs, to which Vanessa raises her eyebrows at her.
“We already got asked! And we denied there was anything at all going on!” she laughs, thinking back to their It Takes Two elimination interview where Cheryl had grilled them on their relationship status, and they’d had to smile and laugh and say they were just friends.
(Although the way Brooke had pushed her up against the wall backstage to kiss her afterwards, unable to keep her hands off her, begged to differ.)
“Well, they’ll ask again! I’ll be mad if they don’t,” Brooke huffs, making Vanessa giggle all the more.
There’s a lull in the conversation where Brooke leans over to her side, hands Vanessa a pizza box with three slices of pepperoni inside it. “Saved you some. I knew these vultures would be ruthless. I think Willam’s had five slices already, fuck knows how she’s going to dance.”
Vanessa laughs out a thank you, taking a slice that’s gone from hot to warm but biting into it regardless. As Brooke nibbles on her crust and the pair of them chew contentedly, Vanessa nudges Brooke’s calf with her foot.
“What’re you doin’ this week? I wanna see you.”
Brooke tilts her head in thought. “I’ve got Wednesday off filming. Other than that I’m free most afternoons and…Friday night.”
Vanessa pouts. “So I can’t stay over Tuesday?”
“I’ll get back from filming at, like, nine. But you can stay over, of course you can! You might need to make dinner, though. Ooh, or we could get Chinese?”
It makes Vanessa feel all excited and tingly, the fact that she and Brooke get to do this. Plan their week together and what they want to do; endless little futures, dreams becoming real. Each time Vanessa spends time with her girlfriend she swears she’s one step closer to telling her exactly how she feels about her, words she’s not said properly in quite a while. It’s a scary feeling, but an exciting one, like being on a rollercoaster or doing a bungee jump.
Brooke sees the dopey smile on her face and laughs. “What?”
“I’m just happy we get to do this. Just be together an’ do coupley shit. Never thought I’d be able to do all this again with someone,” she smiles shyly, and her words make Brooke lean in and kiss her forehead. Vanessa suddenly remembers something and flinches. “Pizza grease lips!”
“Oh, relax. They’ll stick some foundation on it and you’ll be fine,” Brooke pouts, cuddling her closer. “Hey, when do you fly back home for Christmas?”
“20th. You?”
“21st,” Brooke says, then sighs and takes Vanessa’s hand. “Will it give you the ick if I say I’m going to miss you? Like, a lot?”
“Shut up, not at all!” Vanessa tips her head back to laugh, incredulous. She brings Brooke’s hand up and kisses it three times in quick succession. “I’m gonna miss you too. But hey, when we get back we’ll have rehearsals an’ then the tour. It’ll be almost like we’re back doin’ the show!”
Brooke perks up beside her, and Vanessa uses the small pause in conversation to take another bite of her pizza, being ever-so-careful not to have it touch her lipstick.
“Where’re you most excited for?”
Vanessa looks back at Brooke and blinks, her train of thought lost. “What?”
“On the tour. Where are you looking forward to the most?” Brooke asks again patiently. Vanessa thinks, then raises her eyebrows as she decides.
“Belfast is nice. Good places to eat, good nights out. An’ the river is so gorge when it’s night and all the buildings around it are lit up.”
Brooke waggles her eyebrows. “You’re going to be taking me on some romantic midnight walks, then?”
Vanessa laughs, winks at her. “If you’re lucky. What about you, boo, where you excited for?”
Brooke tilts her head in thought. “Aberdeen interests me.”
Vanessa can’t help the laugh she splutters out. “Oh, baby. Aberdeen is dead, there’s fuckin’…nothin’ there. If we’re talkin’ Scotland then Glasgow is the best. They know how to party in Glasgow. I remember the first year we did the tour me an’ a few of the other girls had a night out there. Well Lord Jesus if it wasn’t the most chaotic night out we ever had. It was like a renaissance paintin’ or some shit. Kiki an’ Monique were just standin’ there open-mouthed at everything but me an’ Crystal were lovin’ it. Reminded us of nights out back home but on steroids.”
Brooke laughs, hums as something occurs to her mid-pizza slice. “Newcastle, though. That’s a good night out.”
“Y’know what we need to prioritise? Cute date venues. That’s what we can do while we’re both away! Make a list of all the cities on the tour an’ look up good places to eat an’ things to do,” Vanessa says enthusiastically, watches Brooke’s face light up in response. It makes Vanessa’s heart happy to know that Brooke’s as invested in the pair of them as she is, the concept of them being them.
The pair of them spend the time leading up to the finale chatting excitedly with the other girls, singing loudly along to the songs playing through the speakers with the other, and finishing off the pizza. Vanessa thinks it’s interesting seeing how all the different new couples behave. Vixen and Blair are low-key and subtle; a squeeze of each others’ hand here, a shared look of affection there. In contrast, Jan and Jackie can’t help but kiss each other on the cheek every few minutes or so, vocal and proud of each other and wanting all the other girls to know it. Willam and Courtney’s budding relationship seems to be built on Willam gently bullying Courtney, and Yvie and Scarlet’s built on Yvie laughing at things Scarlet does, even if she doesn’t mean to be funny. Gigi and Crystal are shy and still a little nervous and Jackie thinks it’s funny to call them out on it every so often and make them blush furiously. Monique is bashful and secretive and Monet is loud and public, clearly wanting everyone to know how loved-up she is.
It’s funny the way that a simple dancing competition has brought so many different girls from so many different walks of life together, who might not ever have met otherwise but now have the chance to build a future with each other. It’s nice, Vanessa thinks, as she puts her arm around her own future that’s sitting beside her, howling at a joke Yvie’s made.
Soon enough, the girls are all called through to assemble on the ballroom floor. Vanessa slips her hand into Brooke’s as they make their way through the corridors that are hidden from view with huge black drapes, her heart pounding in anticipation. It’s a bittersweet feeling; the last time she and Brooke are going to be dancing together on the ballroom floor, the last time she’s going to be dancing with the other pros for a while at least. But she wants to make it count, and she wants to be the best she can be, so she tips the scales in her mind to the more positive side, squeezes Brooke’s hand and kisses her on the cheek as they wait to be told to assemble.
“So proud of you,” Brooke murmurs against her hair, having not quite pulled away yet.
“So proud of us,” Vanessa corrects her, squeezing her waist. She wants to say it, she wants to just say I love you like it’s the most simple thing in the world.
Not yet.
When they all dance together for the last time and the audience claps and cheers, Vanessa’s heart feels full and lit up. She’s happy, and she’s no longer carrying the burden of what-happened-last-year around with her. She feels as if she’s walking on air as she makes her way up to the Divinatorium with Brooke’s arm around her shoulders, ready to watch her friends all dance their hearts out for a chance at the glitterball.
The finalists had to prepare three dances: their favourite of the ones they’d performed all season, the judges’ pick, and a showdance. The couples’ pick is up first, and Vanessa watches with interest at each of their choices. She smirks up at Brooke as Monet and Monique perform their Waltz to I Have Nothing again, explaining to her that their first kiss had been when they’d rehearsed for it. It’s still beautiful and mesmerising though, just as it had been the first time around, and when they get a perfect score of 40 Vanessa swears she’s the loudest member of the audience there is.
Akeria and Asia are next, and they’ve picked their Argentine Tango from Musicals week. Their reasoning is clever, Vanessa thinks; it was a semi-recent performance so it’s still fresh in their minds, and it was the one they performed in the dance-off so they have the opportunity to redeem themselves for the judges. When they’re scored 38, Vanessa’s heart bursts with pride.
The last couple to perform their first dance are Gigi and Crystal, who’ve chosen their movie week dance to Licence to Kill. Vanessa smiles as she watches the pair of them, remembering how Crystal had told her how gorgeous she’d thought Gigi looked in her Rhumba dress. Watching the pair of them dance now it’s filled with so much more passion and heat, and Vanessa will eat her own hands if they don’t score 40. They end up receiving 39 thanks to Bianca and her stubborn scoring, but Vanessa’s proud of them anyway.
“What would we have chosen if we’d made it this far?” Brooke asks Vanessa, as there’s a break to allow some guest performer to showcase their new single. Vanessa doesn’t even have to think twice.
“Argentine for sure. Wait no- maybe the Salsa.”
“You just want an excuse to do sexy dances with me again, then?” Brooke pokes her tongue out, murmuring quietly. Vanessa gives her girlfriend’s butt a squeeze in response and has to clap a hand over her mouth to stop herself laughing as Brooke lets out a squeak right in the middle of the performance.
“I’d do our Commercial. I never got to do it with you the first time around,” Brooke says, after she’s calmed down. Vanessa raises her eyebrows and nods in approval, liking the idea. Maybe they could do one of each on tour.
The evening soon progresses to the judges’ choice dances. For Crystal and Gigi, they’ve chosen their week one Samba- a choice that, Vanessa is sure, the girls will be cursing them for as it’ll have required a lot of re-learning. However they still perform it well, and they earn a 38. Monique and Monet perform their Jive, and as Vanessa watches it she becomes all excited for her friend, because it’s shaping up to be one of the most iconic dances in the show’s history. They receive 39, another amazing score. Akeria and Asia perform last- their Commercial, which Vanessa is pleased about. Commercial is easy and almost guarantees a good score. Sure enough, the judges give them 40, and Vanessa practically leaps on her friend when she’s finished with her interview.
After a pro dance, the final dances of the evening- the last attempt to win some votes- are the showdances, designed and choreographed to be a showcase of all the celebrities have learned over the course of the competition. Vanessa’s excited- she hasn’t seen any of the girls’ rehearsals and she’s deliberately not looked at the songs they’ve chosen, and so she’s going into the dances blind.
She clasps Brooke’s hand excitedly as she watches Akeria and Asia go first, the fringing to their dresses Vanessa had seen them be fitted for earlier making her realise it’ll have elements of a Charleston. The opening chords of I Got Rhythm blast out into the studio, and the girls immediately throw themselves into their dance. Vanessa watches it all with delight, so relieved and happy at how well the two girls are doing. When it gets another score of 39, Vanessa screeches so loudly that Aja gives her a glare, deafened from her position on the other side of her.
Gigi and Crystal are next, and their matching pink dresses are perfect for their dance to Sparkling Diamonds. They hit every beat effortlessly, and it’s clear that they’ve both put everything into rehearsals as the dance is executed perfectly. They are scored 39 too, and Vanessa bounces on her toes impatiently, a little irked. The judges are handing out the perfect scores sparingly tonight, and Vanessa badly wants Monet and Monique to get another.
When the last couple take to the dancefloor underneath a giant halo of fairy lights, Vanessa gasps. Monet’s hair is loose and curled down her back and Monique’s is matching, a little sparkling silver butterfly clip pinning some of it back from her face. They’re in long white dresses of taffeta and lace, dotted with sparkling silver diamantes and sequins, and they’re barefoot, indicating a contemporary theme. Vanessa’s heartened by how stunning they look.
And, as the piano begins playing, Vanessa hears Brooke let out a little gasp beside her.
“Oh my God, this is going to be beautiful,” she whispers, and Vanessa nods excitedly in agreement.
As the singer begins, Monique and Monet start to move; slowly, gracefully, gently, like two little figures in a music box.
“I close my eyes and I can see, the world that’s waiting up for me…that I call my own…”
Vanessa is close to letting out a gasp herself as the two girls move across the ballroom floor with skill and agility, tumbling and twirling through the air. It’s not just how perfectly they’re executing the dance though. It’s the way Monique’s looking at Monet with adoration, it’s the way Monet smiles back at her, just happy to be dancing with the girl she cares about. It’s the way the dance is illustrative of what’s blooming between them- fragile, delicate and beautiful- and Vanessa wonders if Monique intentionally choreographed it that way.
“Every night I lie in bed, the brightest colours fill my head, a million dreams are keeping me awake…”
As the song reaches its climax and the pair of them run over to a huge circular platform, Vanessa lets go of Brooke’s hand and cups her face with both of her own, awed and stunned. Because carpeting the platform are shimmering circles of white and silver confetti, and as Monet and Monique conclude their dance, kick up and scatter it, it surrounds them like stars. Vanessa doesn’t know if it’s the music, or the choreography, or simply the connection between the two girls, but she finds her eyes beginning to fill with tears, so much so that Brooke notices and pulls her in close for a hug. They watch the dance finish with their arms around each other, and that’s how the girls end too; Monet’s arms anchoring Monique tightly and Monique’s wrapped around Monet’s waist.
The judges are crying, and, to Vanessa’s unbridled delight, the girls are given full marks for their showdance.
As Vanessa gives her friend a quick hug before they have to go back on stage for the winner to be announced, she whispers to Monique.
“That dance just won you the competition, baby. Well done.”
Monique pulls away and makes a face. “C’mon, Vanj, we don’t know that for sure.”
But Vanessa does. So after the VT is shown of the recap of the full season and Michelle announces that the votes are closed, Vanessa holds her breath. From her position at the bannister she can see Crystal and Gigi, Monet and Monique, and Akeria and Asia, all of them standing within about two metres of the glitterball trophy and within touching distance of being announced the winners. Vanessa would love it to be any of the girls, but she’s sure of who is going to take the trophy. The lights go down, the audience holds their breath, and Brooke clings tightly to Vanessa from behind.
“Crystal and Gigi…” Michelle begins, her voice full of suspense and anticipation. “…Akeria and Asia…Monet and Monique. The votes have been counted and independently verified, and I can now reveal that the Strictly Come Dancing champions of 2020 are…”
Drum beat. Drum beat. Drum beat. Vanessa is holding her breath so much she feels as though she could be sick. She can feel Brooke’s heart beat through her chest against her back, and Vanessa feels as if her whole body is shaking as she looks down at the girls. Crystal has her arm around Gigi as the other girl looks to the ceiling, taking deep breaths. Akeria’s holding Asia’s hand, both of them looking to the floor nervously. And Monique is tucked in to Monet’s side, their arms wrapped around each other and both of their eyes squeezed tightly shut.
Drum beat. Drum beat. Drum beat.
“MONET AND MONIQUE!”
Vanessa immediately flinches against Brooke, almost knocking her out as she launches herself roughly ten feet in the air and screams so loud she feels as if her vocal cords will snap. When she begins crying it’s as if a massive bank has burst, the relief and the pride and the love she feels for her friend so overwhelming and euphoric.
Monique is doubled over in shock, sobbing as she launches herself away from Monet, and Monet, for her part, is simply screaming “WHAT?” over and over again. The two other pairs are laughing and beaming as they cheer for the winners and Akeria is jumping up and down, clapping so hard Vanessa’s worried about the skin on her palms.
Michelle ushers the winning girls over, and Vanessa melts against Brooke with bliss as her girlfriend presses a kiss to her temple. The win is as much for the three friends as well as Monique and Monet themselves, and Vanessa wants nothing more than to throw herself off the balcony and run to Monique and Akeria, to crush them both in a hug and never let go. But Monet is being interviewed, her arm tight around Monique’s waist as she’s asked how it feels to win.
“I still don’t believe it!!” she cries, her face a picture of disbelief as she looks at Monique with incredulity. “It feels absolutely crazy, crazy and surreal, I mean the fact that we won in amongst all this talent…I never expected it, not one bit. But you know…I should’ve expected it, I should, because I have the best teacher, the absolute best teacher and friend and straight-up best person I could’ve asked for to share this experience with, and she deserves this win so much, I just…I mean, you know how I feel about you, babe, so I’m just gonna shut up.”
The audience cheers as Monet pulls Monique in for a hug, and Vanessa can see Monique’s frame shaking as she sobs against Monet’s chest. Vanessa knows how unlucky Monique’s been with her previous partners, she knows how much she’s wanted this for so long. Michelle is smiling as she gestures to Monique.
“Monique, what would you like to say to Monet, to the girl that got you the glitterball?”
Monique pulls out of the hug, takes a few deep breaths to compose herself and breaks out into a coy smile as she looks at Monet, a little twinkle in both their eyes.
“What would I like to say to Monet…many, many things, so many things…I mean, first up, thank you, Lord, thank you for bein’ the best student, for giving your everything every single damn week, for…” Monique gestures to the trophy. “…for this…but also for bein’ the best person to share this whole crazy journey with, and it has been crazy, it’s been crazier than I ever imagined, but I’m so grateful for it all.”
Vanessa can feel the tears stream down her face as she watches Michelle rest a hand on the glitterball trophy. “Well, Monique and Monet, it gives me great pleasure to present you with this trophy, and to officially announce you…Strictly Come Dancing champions!”
The audience cheers in anticipation of the two girls lifting the trophy, but there’s a little pause as Vanessa watches Monet turn to Monique, whisper something into her ear with a little questioning look to her gaze. Monique looks to the floor bashfully, then bites back a smile as she gives a little nod. It’s when that happens that Monet turns to Michelle again, her hand on the trophy.
“Actually, Michelle, can I say somethin’ else before we lift this up?” Monet asks, and Michelle smiles indulgently.
“Make it quick, girl, we’ve got two minutes of screen time left.”
“Okay. I also just quickly wanted to say thank you so much to everyone involved who commissioned this series…it has been an absolute triumph, to see and to work alongside twenty three other women who’ve all proved their talents and who’ve all proved that same-sex pairings can work, and that the world doesn’t implode if you let two girls dance with each other…and I hope future series are going to reflect this too. And finally…” Monet smirks, curling her fingers around the trophy as Monique’s hand rests on top of hers and joins it. “…it wouldn’t be my career without me doing or saying something controversial, so why change the habit of a lifetime? THIS ONE’S FOR THE LESBIANS!”
With that, Monet and Monique lift the trophy in the air, the pyrotechnics go off in the background, and the two girls crash their lips together in a kiss that’s instantly broadcast to roughly nine million people. The audience is almost cheering the roof off the studio, Brooke is punching the air, and Vanessa screeches so loud and for so long that she’s momentarily worried for her lungs. Michelle smiles wryly as she concludes the show and the competition for another year, and the girls in the Divinatorium are given the green light to flood the ballroom floor, descending on the winners and the runners-up and showering them in hugs, kisses, and congratulations. And, just as she’d wanted, Vanessa sweeps Akeria and Monique into a tight hug, the three of them teary and euphoric, happy they’d done what they set out to do from the start.
Vanessa supposes she doesn’t need any alcohol at the afterparty given how completely drunk off Monique’s success she feels already, but she ends up being three glasses of celebratory champagne in anyway. It would be rude not to, and she’s never one to turn down free alcohol, but judging by the way the other girls are swaying around the hotel function room, she’s not holding up too badly in comparison. Blair has already been dispatched back to her flat in an Uber, Vixen’s coat thrown over her head to prevent any of the paparazzi getting any less than desirable photos. The Strictly afterparties are always riotous, and adding Willam into the mix doesn’t help matters either. So when Brooke taks Vanessa’s hand and tugs her in the direction of the fire exit to grab some fresh air, Vanessa is happy to follow and get a small break, some peace and quiet.
It’s nearing half past midnight and the street outside is becoming coated in a thin sheen of frost, one that makes the pavement sparkle under the yellow halo glow of the streetlamps. The paps have all scuttled back into the sewers from whence they came, already satisfied with the shots they got of Gigi and Crystal leaving hand-in-hand which are sure to get tongues wagging tomorrow. All is still, calm and quiet to the extent where Vanessa feels as if she’s experiencing some form of ambiguous space and time. If it’s cold outside, she doesn’t feel it.
“So? How’re you likin’ your first Strictly aftershow party?” Vanessa asks Brooke, punctuating her question with an ever-so-slightly tipsy wink. Brooke giggles as she leans against the brick wall, hissing a little at the cold.
“I don’t think I’m going to survive til the end,” she laughs. “Although Jackie keeps feeding me pints of water against my will, so it doesn’t even feel like I’ve had any alcohol despite the fact I’m making it my mission to drink the BBC out of house and home.”
“You’re too sensible,” Vanessa pouts, circling her arms around Brooke’s waist and squashing her cheek against her chest. After a moment to think, she chuckles. “Wonder how many Ofcom complaints Monet’s gonna get for that kiss.”
“Thousands. And good for her. Now everyone’s going to be talking about their win for years to come. That was a smart move,” Brooke nods appreciatively. “Guess those two will be girlfriends within the next twenty-four hours then.”
“Oh, for sure. It’s so clear that Monet’s head over heels in love with her,” Vanessa smiles, then her face drops as her heart siezes up.
It could be the night, it could be the champagne, it could be the way everything around them is sparkling, but Vanessa pulls her head up from Brooke’s chest, smiles as she looks her in the eye. There’s just one thing left to make the night as perfect as it could possibly be.
“What?” Brooke giggles a little, her gaze soft as she tucks a lock of hair behind Vanessa’s ear. “Why are you just staring at me? I know I’m pretty, but it’s rude to stare. Unless you want to take me back to yours. Then you can stare at me all you want. Preferably without any clothes on.”
“Brooke Lynn, shut up,” Vanessa laughs gently. Her heart is beating so fast in her throat that she feels as if it might crawl up and choke her, and every second she gets closer to admitting things she feels as if she’s about to pass out. But she takes a deep breath, squeezes Brooke tighter because if she does then Vanessa knows she won’t run away.
“I think I’m falling in love with you.”
Brooke’s jaw goes a little slack, in disbelief for a second before a smile slowly spreads onto her face. Vanessa can’t tell what that means, so she continues to babble on. “I promise it’s not because I’ve had a drink. I mean it. I really love you, and I know that’s a lot and you don’t have to say it back.”
“Vanessa,” Brooke brings a hand up to cup her jaw, which she immediately nuzzles into. “Me too.”
The validation makes Vanessa’s smile hurt her face. Brooke loves her. Brooke is in love with her. It’s an unspoken promise that they’re about to embark on a crazy but amazing journey together, one that Vanessa never wants to end, and she feels her heart ever-so-slightly break with how much and how intensely she loves her girlfriend.
“I love you,” Brooke says, through a nervous, excited giggle.
“I love you too,” Vanessa smiles back at her.
She tilts her head down to kiss her, their lips meeting urgently but their kiss slow, as if to match the kind of purgatory they’ve found themselves existing in. But it’s not, because kissing Brooke is like a heaven that Vanessa’s only ever dreamt of, and it’s real. She leans against her, both their bodies steadied by Brooke’s back against the wall, and when she pulls away she keeps their foreheads pressed together as if she’s not quite ready for their perfect moment to end.
It’s only in that second when Vanessa blinks that a bright flash clouds her vision and the sound of a shutter echoes from across the street. Her head snaps to the other side of the road and she’s met with the figure of a tall man, a brown bag slung over his shoulder which Vanessa instantly recognises as one which holds varying pieces of photographer’s equipment. He struggles under the weight of his long-lens camera before scurrying away out of sight.
When Vanessa turns back to look at Brooke, the pair of them splutter out a resigned laugh at the same time.
“Well. Guess that solves the problem of how we reveal our relationship to the world,” Brooke smirks. Her expression quickly changes into one of concern, and she takes one of Vanessa’s hands in hers. “Hey. You okay?”
Even a thousand camera flashes couldn’t stop how happy Vanessa feels. “I’m amazing.”
Brooke raises an eyebrow at her, as if to check. “Sure? Not bothered by the incriminating photos of us smooching in the street?”
Vanessa laughs, locking her fingers around Brooke’s knuckles. “We can deal with that tomorrow.”
Brooke’s expression relaxes and as it does, Vanessa leans against her and raises a suggestive eyebrow.
“Although maybe the poor guy needs a better shot. Maybe…” she smirks cheekily, tilting her face close to her girlfriend’s. “…we should keep kissing some more.”
And as Vanessa meets Brooke’s lips once again, she finds herself not caring about cameras, paparazzi, the newspapers or the media or the opinions of anyone else.
All she cares about is Brooke Lynn and the future they’ve got together, and all of that is worth a million glitterball trophies to her.
#rpdr fanfiction#ortega#bet you look good on the dancefloor#strictly au#lesbian au#branjie#vanessa vanjie mateo#brooke lynn hytes#jan sport#jackie cox#crystal methyd#gigi goode#akeria davenport#monique heart#monet x change#background momo#background jankie#background crygi
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Seeking: Family, Foster Twins 5
Enter Picani, Therapist Extraordinaire!
Warnings: referenced child abuse throughout, panic attack, implied separation anxiety.
First | Previous | AO3
***
Movie night went… well, actually. Roman was quiet, cuddling into Remus's side as they shared one of the couches, but they both laughed and muttered along to the kids movie they'd picked, and Patton had heard them chatting comfortably in the kitchen while they supervised the popcorn process.
The next morning he heard back from Emile about the voicemail he'd left. There was an appointment available during Emile's lunch, that he usually left in case of emergencies like this one. He had time to fit both twins individually if Remus wanted to come along too, and Patton could call in for an appointment of his own when the boys went to Remy's for their end of the week assessment.
Patton wasn't sure how to approach Remus. The boy was clearly starving for every drop of affection and kind parenting he gave him, thriving on the praise and thanks after a job well done. He'd damn near whimpered when Patton had thanked him again for swapping chores so the adult could talk to his twin, and had even tried to take on the hoovering, craving the validation.
He'd been kind but firm then, letting Remus know that this was a deal and it was meant to be kept to, because Patton was an equal member of the household and had his own share of the responsibilities. Remus didn't understand yet but he didn't have to do chores to earn affection, and it needed to be made clear from the start.
But how to broach the subject of the therapist? Children were unpredictable, he knew that. He'd seen the dissociation Roman had exhibited and he wasn't so sure Remus, even with all of his desperation to please, would be particularly positive either.
"Boys, you all done there?" He asked, poking his head into the laundry room to see them actually folding the clothes. "Oh wonderful! I've got some news for you both, if you're free?"
Remus waited for Roman as always, and when Roman nodded he did too, following Patton out to the kitchen table where Patton can push some small info booklets from Emile's practice over to them to browse through. "So I talked to Dr Picani, like I said I would to you, Roman. He has some time today at lunch. And we haven't had a chance to chat about it yet Remus, but he's offered you a spot too, if you're ready to join us today? It's just an informal meeting, so you can ask him questions and see if you'll get along with him. We'd need to go in about an hour, what do you boys think?"
There was a long silence as the twins both stared at their pamphlets. Patton waited with unending patience, before clearing his throat when the silence dragged on. "Would you prefer to have a chat about it together without me?" He suggested softly, and Roman's quick nod confirmed his suspicions.
They were a united front against the world. It didn't surprise him that this perceived threat warranted a discussion.
Patton left them to it and absolutely did not eavesdrop. He felt the temptation to, of course he did. He was human and he was trying to parent two hurt boys that were fresh out of an incredibly toxic home environment. Eavesdropping could provide valuable information that could help him understand and look after them better.
But it wasn't worth it to betray their trust like that. He made sure they could hear him move into the kitchen to set the kettle on, texting Emile with an update and catching up on some news on twitter before Remus appeared in the doorway to fetch him. The boy shifted from foot to foot, rubbing the back of his head, and mumbled that they'd talked it over, if he'd like to hear what they had to say.
"Of course," Patton replied, patting Remus's shoulder on the way into the room.
"We'll go," Roman said immediately, before Patton had even had a chance to sit down. "But we might not like it."
"Understandable."
"And we just want to ask questions. We don't want to answer anything today."
"There may be intake forms, but that's absolutely something for you to discuss with Dr Picani. I won't be involved in the process apart from as your lift either way."
"... You won't ask?" Roman checked, narrowing his eyes with what looked like a mix of suspicion and genuine confusion. "You won't get him to tell you?"
Patton had to fight not to gasp at the idea. "No!" He said firmly instead. "That would be not only disrespectful to both of you, but also breaching the confidentiality of therapy. If you boys stay and you want to we can discuss a group session for all three of us together. It can help to improve communication between family, but apart from that your sessions would be your own."
He wanted to ask so badly, if their parents had done that, but he had to leave that to Emile. Patton knew the value of trust and he knew the value of keeping things separate, and trying to pry into their lives now would never work. If they chose to say something, to come to him then it would be amazing and beautiful and precious, but to force it would be to tell them he was just there to fix them. Not to be the parent they truly required.
Not that Patton didn't hope that would happen one day; he was an excellent and enthusiastic giver of hugs. And he missed his hugs sessions with Thomas a lot.
The twins shared a glance and Remus shrugged, leg bouncing under the table, fingers picking at his lip. "So we'll go in an hour and talk to this doctor, and then...?"
"Whatever you like. I'm thinking we could go out for the day tomorrow, so if you wanted to just go to the park or hang out around here this afternoon that's cool. What were you two thinking?"
"P-"
"I want to stay here," Roman spoke over his brother. Remus didn't even react apart from to stop talking and immediately close his mouth, looking at his brother. Patton breathed deeply.
"Okay. And you, Remus?" He asked softly, keeping the tone as even as possible so Roman didn't interpret it as a jab.
Remus shrugged. "Here is fine," he said, casting a small glance and a smile at his twin.
"Alrighty then. Maybe we can grab some lunch on the way back first then. Alright guys, I'm going to go and do some office time, be ready in an hour, if you can. Don't worry about bringing anything with you but yourselves now!"
Dr Emile Picani was, in Patton's humble opinion, one of the best child- and indeed adult- therapists in the state, if not the country. He smiled that same relaxed, slightly sheepish smile when he saw the three of them walk in, greeting Patton with a hug and asking the boys for their names without trying to force any contact. Patton could see him analysing quickly in his head as he gathered insignificant bits of information, like age and school year, putting them at ease and probably running through the list of observations Patton had sent ahead.
"Well I don't know about you guys, but I'm ready to go in! Who wants to go first?" He said, while Patton filled out their forms with the receptionist. "No takers? Okay, why don't we go by alphabetical order, so that's you then Remus. Is that okay?"
Remus nodded, but Patton caught the faint gulp out of the corner of his eyes and offered the boy a reassuring smile when wide eyes found his, before the pair headed into Emile's room. Roman sloped off to the waiting area chairs and pointedly ignored Patton when he sat nearby, playing something on his phone.
"Do you think he's okay?" He asked abruptly about five minutes in. "He's not good with questions, or like, direct stuff. Maybe you should check on him."
Patton glanced up. "I'm sure he's fine. Em- Dr Picani is a professional, and if Remus was uncomfortable he would end the meeting and bring him out."
"Yeah but what if he can't tell, you know? What if he thinks Remus is just being super quiet or something?"
"Roman, it's alright, can you try and take a few deep breaths for me?"
"Because he's super quiet around new people, you're like, a weird anomaly, and he gets panicked real easy and what if Dr Picani says the wrong thing-"
"Roman,"
"Cause it's easy to do that, I do that sometimes and I should know! I know what he's like but Dr Picani doesn't I-"
"Roman, I'm going to hold your hand okay?"
Roman looked at him with wide eyes. "Okay," he gasped, squeezing tight when Patton grasped his fingers.
Patton shuffled closer and waited for Roman to look at him again. "I'm going to put your hand on my chest so you can feel my breathing, alright? I'd like you to try and copy my breathing. There's no rush, just try and copy along. There you go."
They breathed and breathed together. The receptionist gave Patton a glanced but he shook his head, wary of trying to introduce anyone else in to help with Roman's panic attack. The boy stared almost without blinking at his face, until his chest didn't heave anymore but rose and fell in a more reasonable rhythm.
He whined very quietly under his breath, and Patton smiled at him. "That was awesome, well done. Thank you for letting me help, Roman." The teenager nodded at him quickly, and yanked his hand back when the door to Emile's room opened and the doctor led Remus out.
"Oh, Ro..." Remus whispered, hurrying to his twins side to hug him while the adults shared a long glance. "It's okay, it's not really scary at all! Dr P was really nice, and I felt okay, and I'll be waiting here the whole time, right?" He looked to Patton for a nod of confirmation, quickly supplied. "See?"
Roman was still shaky but he let Remus help him up and over to the door, glancing back just before Emile closed it on them.
Remus wasn't a whole lot better, being kept from his brother, but perhaps the knowledge of what was going on behind the door helped because he mostly sat and played with the kid's block toy that seemed to be in every waiting room ever, occasionally asking Patton questions like,
"How long will he be?"
"Probably a few more minutes, if it's much like yours."
And,
"Is Dr Picani really like that, or is it just, y'know, to make you feel better?"
"Might be a bit of both kiddo. He's a real softie, but he is a professional and he is there to make you feel comfortable, right?"
"Right, right."
And lastly,
"Patton?"
"Mm?"
"Do you go to therapy too?"
Patton closed his book and sat forwards to answer Remus's innocuous question properly, feeling the weight of the attention Remus was pretending wasn't trained directly on his answer. "I do, Remus. I try to see Dr Picani when I can, and when I had Thomas we used to go to him together as well. I sometimes go extra, if I need the support once in a while. In fact, while you guys have your meeting with Remy this Friday I think I'll give Dr P a visit, so I can talk to him about what's going on in my life too."
"Oh."
"Oh?"
Remus blanched. "No I mean, I just thought you were... like, not like us."
Oh dear. Patton raked his fingers through his hair. "What do you mean by that one, kiddo?"
But Remus wouldn't answer, just shrugging and turning back to discovering and rediscovering the path of the orange block from one end of the wire to the other.
Roman wasn't exactly smiling when he came out, but nor did he have the same edge of panic to him as when he'd entered. He kept glancing at Emile with the same slightly puzzled expression Remus was, while Emile happily ignored the attention and evenly explained the next steps, bidding them all a good afternoon.
"So, who wants to grab food on the way home?" Patton asked, breaking the awkward silence that followed Emile's departure.
The boys lit up, and although they were subdued on the way back they seemed mostly to be lost in thought. Patton would take it as a win for now, and hope that when he asked later they both gave him positive answers to going back again.
If they stayed, of course.
He really hoped they stayed. He was already so attached...
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Next
#writepie#foster family au#creativitwins#ts patton#ts remus#ts roman#ts emile#ts writing#ts sanders sides#ts sanders sides aus#ts sanders sides fic#sanders sides#child abuse tw
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Stitches ch 9: Christmas Tree Farm
Well guys, after the worlds longest wait, I’ve finally got this ready for you guys. I added in a special guest in this chapter, but don’t worry, he’s not here to break up our love birds, just here to help out when something goes wrong.
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Waking up at 6:00 in the mornig was not something you were really ready for, but the drive to the cabin was seven hours long, and Shawn said he’d rather start driving in the dark than finish in it. So after getting ready, you grabbed your bags, slipped your charger and birth control into your purse, put your pillow under your arm, and made your way to the hallway to meet up with everyone.
“Good morning princess, you look cozy.” Shawn smiled, pulling you in for a hug and grabbing your suitcase. “I already put my stuff in the Jeep. Emily and Maddie left with Kyle and Jess, and Cheryl and Roni left after them. That way they could get into the cabin.”
You nodded, yawning and rubbing your eyes. “Can we stop and get breakfast on the way? I really want a blueberry muffin and hot cocoa.” He laughed at your sleepiness and nodded, placing his hand on your lower back and leading you down to the car that was already running and warm.
“So there’s a starbucks about twenty minutes down the road, can you wait until then or do you want me to stop at the one on campus before we leave?” He asked as you plugged in your phone and chose a softer playlist for the first hour or two.
Honestly you didn’y really care, so you just shrugged, “Well I’m not really hungry as soon as I wake up, so the further one? Is that okay?” you asked as you settled into the seat with your blanket and pillow in case you wanted to take a nap. You offered to take over at any time but Shawn said he’d much rather drive the whole way so you didn’t get nervous driving on the icy roads and he’s used to them.
“I can wait baby, let’s get going shall we? Emily said that every couple is able to have their own room and they all have bathrooms, that means no one has to share or risk walking in.” he wiggled his eyebrows and you laughed, swatting at his shoulder and turning up the music.
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You were now four hours into the drive, and you could tell Shawn was tired. His eyes were red from watching the road, his upper body was stiff and tense from sitting in the car, and he was yawning. “Baby are you sure you don’t want me to take over? You look really tired and I’m okay to drive, really. You look like you could use a break.”
Shawn just smiled at you and shook his head. “No, really, it’s okay. I like the driving, it keeps me awake and if something happened to us on the ice, I don’t want you to blame yourself. Besides, we are over half way there now.” He let out another yawn, thumbs tapping along to the radio. “I just wanna get there and take a nice hot shower and eat and then crawl into bed with my girl.” you squealed as he pinched your thigh and he laughed.
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Pulling up to Emily’s family cabin was like entering your own Hallmark movie. The driveway was long and had the other two cars already parked and dusted with snow. There were lights already hung around the edge of the roof, most likely there all year, and a large tree with a star on top. The house it’s self was three stories high, made of dark wood and you could see smoke from the chimney. “Oh wow. It’s a fucking winter wonderland.” You awed, you knew her family was well off, but not this well.
“I was hoping you’d like it.” Shawn smiled at you, you stared back in confusion.
“What do you mean? Did you plan this?” he just laughed and turned off the Jeep, leaning over to kiss your nose.
“Well after you fell asleep last night I was thinking about how you couldn’t go see your family and I know you really wanted to. So I texted Em about ideas and she said she was coming up here anyways and was going to ask you. Our plans just synced up perfectly.” He was smiling brightly at you as you shook your head in disbelief.
Grabbing your blanket and pillow, you put yours and Shawn’s bags on your shoulders while Shawn grabbed the suitcases and you made your way to the cabin. The warm air instantly washed over you as you stepped inside, and you could smell the burning wood from the fire. “You guys finally made it!” Emily shouted from the second story, and she came running down to hug you.
“We made a stop to eat and pick up some heavier jackets.” Shawn said, closing the door and rubbing your arms to warm you up. “Where can we put our stuff? I wanna get into some warmer clothes.” He asked, Emily pointed to the second floor.
“The third door to the right, there’s a fireplace and a bathroom in there. All the rooms have them. This place used to be a luxury ski lodge, but the owner passed away and they sold it on the market for crazy cheap, so we bought it and did some renovations and now we use it for family gatherings and sometimes we put it on airbnb near the holidays, but this year it’s all for us. We can stay until spring semester starts if we want!”
Making your way to your bedroom for the next, however many weeks, you took time to look at the artwork on the walls, your eyes fell on the fur blanket on the end of the couch in the upstairs lounge area and silently prayed it wasn’t made of real fur. Shawn walked ahead of you, opening the door to your room and waiting for you.
Walking in, you let out a gasp, the walls were a red cherry wood, the bed was huge and had a pile of blankets, and probably ten pillows. The fireplace was rock, with a pile of wood for you to use, and a tv mounted above it. This place was amazing and you couldn’t wait to spend christmas here
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“Kyle, can you hand me the box of ornaments please?” You asked, setting down your hot cocoa and dropping your blanket. It was almost midnight, Shawn, Veronica, and Jess had all gone to bed. But you and everyone else were too excited, and couldn’t wait to get all the christmas decorations up. So here you were, on a ladder, waiting to put on the top decorations of the 10 foot tall tree in the middle of the living room.
Christmas was always your favorite time of year, the lights and the music always made you happy. Looking around at almost all of your favorite people dancing around and putting up Christmas decorations, your heart almost exploded. “Hey, should we finish this tonight or let the others join in the morning?” Maddie asked, wrapping tinsel around the banister.
“I mean, I’m wide awake so I’ll probably be up until morning. Might as well get as much done as possible.” Emily smiled and looked at her sleepy girlfriend. “Why don’t you go to bed sweetie, you look like you’re about to fall asleep on the stairs. You giggled and watched as she walked up to place a kiss to her head before walking her to their bedroom. They were so cute, and you were sure you and Shawn were like that as well.
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It was almost 6am and you and Emily were still placing decorations around the cabin, everyone else had eventually gone to bed, but the two of were determined to have everyone wake up to a winter wonderland. The sun was barely peeking through the trees and casting a beautiful glow as you warmed up some water for hot chocolate.
You let out a squeal when someone wrapped their arms around you, but relaxed when you saw the tattoos. “Moring bubs, how’d you sleep?” you asked, handing Shawn a mug and leaning against his chest.
“Would’ve slept better if you’d actually came to bed, but I can see you were quite busy.”he mumbled, his voice rough from sleep. “The place looks beautiful though, byt not as beautiful as you.” you smiled as he placed a kiss to your shoulder and watched you make your cocoa.
Emily yawned and mumbled something about going to bed, so you waved at her and made your way to the couch to watch a movie. “Christmas is my favorite holiday, so I got excited and we stayed up all night putting up the decorations.” you smiled, cuddling under a blanket and wrapping your hands around the warm mug.
Shaw sat next to you, a cup of coffee in his hands, and looked around at the cabin. “Well everyone did an amazing job, but I think the tree looks the best.” he smiled and you looked over at him in shock.
“How did you know that I did the tree?” you asked, laying your legs across his and sipping your drink.
He just smiled at it and pointed at the limbs. “Because you always place complimentary colors together, you don’t let the same colors near each other, and there’s a fair amount of golden ornaments on there and I know that’s your favorite because all your jewllery is gold.”
Your mouth dropped open at his explanation and you just stared at him. No one had ever paid that much attention to your habits. “Emily said that there’s a place in town that does glass blowing and you can custom make your own ornaments. We were talking about making a trip to town later for some present shopping.” you grinned up at him, hoping he’d hint at something he’d like for Christmas.
“That sounds great but, maybe I could take you? You know, as a date?” he smiled, rubbing your back. You nodded and curled into his side, careful to not spill your drink. But Shawn had other ideas, grabbing your mug and setting it on the table. Before you could protest, he wrapped his arms around you. “I think you, pretty girl, have earned a nap.”
He was right, you hadn’t slept since you got to the cabin, so you made yourself comfortable and closed your eyes, letting the warmth from the fireplace and your boyfriend lull you to sleep.
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“Babe come look at this!” you shouted, pointing at the carraige ride set up on front of a store. “He’s got a wreath around his neck, oh! There’s even lights, it looks like something from a disney movie.” you gushed as Shawn walked up to you, handing you a steaming cup of cider. “Oh, thank you.”
You two atood there for a few more seconds before Shawn kissed your cheek. “Does the princess want a ride?” he asked and waved his hand out to motion to the horse. You nodded quickly, dragging him towards the lady selling tickets.
“Two please.” Shawn smiled, wrapping his arm around you. The lady smiled as she took his card and handed it back, along with two tickets to the carraige ride. “Thank you so much.” She nodded, smiling at the two of you as you made your way to the ride.
Now settled in the carraige, a warm blanket over your legs, you leaned in for a kiss. “Today was a amazing bub, thank you.” You spoke against his lips as the horse took off. “I’ve never been on a carriage ride before, or really even seen snow before.” He smiled down at you, eyes bright.
“Well I’m glad you’ve had a good day baby.” the two of you shared a few more kisses before turning to enjoy the scenery and look around the small town. Everything was like a Hallmark movie, from the snow to the lights, to the carriage ride you were currently on. This may be your best Christmas to date, even though you couldn’t be home for it.
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Christmas morning, everyone was awake before the sun was up and piled into the living room. “Merry Christmas my lovelies!” Cheryl shouted as she handed out gifts to everyone. It was a mutual decision that everyone got one gift for everybody, but when it came to your significant other, that was up to you.
“Here Kyle, I forgot to wrap yours.” Shawn laughed, handing him the new golf balls and custom tees he’d gotten yesterday. He smiled, eyes wide since he’d only mentioned his love for golf to Shawn once, at the Fasion department dinner. Again, you noticed his observance of everyone.
Everyone opened their gifts excitedly, Cheryl loved the new vintage bag you got her, that’s the gift you were most excited about since she recently broke the zipper on her old bag and you found one from the same brand at an upper scale thrift shop, it was really more of an outlet, everything brand new, but from the previous season. Maddie was obsessed with the silk scarf you’d gotten her from the same shop, it’d where you found everyone’s gifts. Everyone’s but Shawn’s, his where a little more special.
“Babe, open yours.” Shawn smiled, taking your mug from you. You looked at all the gifts, deciding to open the one’s from Shawn last, so you grabbed a small bag from Roniei. Inside was a metal jewelry box shaped like a butterfly, the inside lined with soft blue velvet. “Oh Ronie, this is beautiful, you know how much I love butterflies.”
She beamed at you from her place on an ottoman, Cheryl on the floor by her feet. “Open mine next!” Cheryl clapped, her perfectly manicured nails shining in the lights from the tree. So you grabbed her’s, opening the box to see a pair of golden butterfly earrings and a matching ring. “Cher! These are stunning, oh my god you guys.” You were almost crying and you still had at least four more gifts to open.
Kyle’s gift was next, it was a set of posters of sketches and the reference photos for Hayley Paige dresses. You told him you loved the way she designed her wedding dresses and you wanted to get married in one. The posters were for the dresses you loved the most, and considering the two of yu talked about her a lot, he knew exactly which ones those were. Jess had gotten you the new sturbucks cup with the glitter logo, Maddie got you a sketch pad and brand new pencils since you mentioned that you also liked to design your own items from time to time. And from Emily, you’d received a new white backpack with your name on it. Her mom made them, everyone got one from her and they were all perfect for each person.
When you reached for the three gifts from Shawn, he grabbed them from you. “They uh, they have to be opened in a specific order.” he explained, handing you the biggest one first, it was also the heaviest. You looked at him as you pulled back the paper, revealing a light pink weighted blanket. “It’s good to help you relax at night and it helps your anxiety, You know, just in case I’m not there when you have an attack and you can’t find one of these guys to help,” he motioned to everyone around the room. “It’s also from your parents as well. We all pitched in your this one.”
You smiled at him, fingers running over the soft fabric of the blanket. He rubbed your calf as he handed you another box “This one is just from me. He stated as you opened the gift. Inside was a pair of diamond earrings set in rose gold and a necklace with an “S” that matched. “I know you thought it was cute when we had that High School Muscial marathon, so I got you one too.” he grinned, proud of his gift.
“This is it beautiful Shawn, and now I have a pair of earrings for my second holes! So that way I can wear both new pairs of earrings.” He nodded, looking over at Ronie, knowing they’d planned it that way. “Can I open my last present now? I want you to open your’s.” He nodded, handing you the last bag, it was heavy for it’s size.
He watched intently as you pulled the tissue paper out, everyone in the room stared at you like they were waiting for you reaction. Looking into the bag you saw a few rolled up shirts, but something about them looked familiar. Pulling out a blue one and watching it unroll you looked at the logo “Pelican Marina Kildare Island” it said, a white on in the bag said the same thing, you let out a gasp as you pulled out a navy blue bandana. “You fucking didn’t!” You looked up at Shawn.
“Look at the white one honey.” he smiled, pulling it out of the bag. Everyone just stared in confusion as you freaked out over shirts that were too big for you.
Taking it into your hands you noticed black markings on the shirt in sharpie. “Is… is that a note, from…” You were unable to form words as you stares down at the shirt, “Remeber, deny, deny, deny. And always call housekeeping. Love Rudy.” written across the front of the garment.
“What is that?” Emily asked, still confused as to why you were absolutely losing it over a bag of ratty looking clothing.
Shawn laughed, “They are from this Netflix show she loves, Outer Banks. Her favorite character wore them, I have a friend that works in the industry and he got them from the set and Rudy Pankow, the actor signed them for her.” They all nodded and went back to talking amongst themselves. “Hey babe,” he nudged your foot, “Check the envelope.” he whispered and you furrowed your brows, not noticing one until you looked at the bottom of the bag. He obviously meant for that to be seen by just you.
Pulling it out, you read it while Shawn started to open his gifts. “Your boyfriend got in contact with me about how our show helped you during a tough time, I am so sorry all those things happened to you, and you have to suffer through the aftermath. However, he really cares about you and just know that you are not alone. Please accept these shirts that I wore as JJ as a way to remind yourself to stay strong, like him. If you ever need anything or feel like you have no one to talk to, please do not hesitate to reach out! You have a beautiful soul and I’d hate to hear one of our watchers is hurting. Xx Rudy.” his phone number written on the bottom.
You looked over at Shawn who was looking at a set of scrubs from Cheryl and placed your hand on his back. “Thank you.” you whispered. He smiled at you and pulled you to him, kissing your head and mumbling an “I love you so much.” before opening the rest of this presents.
When he got to yours, he was giddy. You refused to give him any hints, but talked about how excited you were him to get them. There were two if them, he picked the smaller one first. You sat up straight, watching his face as he opened it. He let out a gasp at the blue stethoscope, a cursive S.M engraved into the metal. “For when you’re all doctor-y and stuff.” you giggled. “Look at the ear pieces.” you encouraged. “I love you.” was also etched into the instrument in yout hand writing.
“Oh baby I love it. I can’t wait to be able to use this!” He smiled, placing it around his neck and kissing your cheek. Grabbing his last gift, you bounced lightly, your excitement getting the best of you. You don’t really know why, it was actually a pretty stupid gift, but for some reason you loved it. Opening the box he smiled and let out a laugh, exactly the reaction you were hoping for. Inside the box was a new set of drawers that you’d labeled and filled with their respective items.
“What the fuck.” Kyle laughed as Shawn pulled out the small storage unit. It was clear with four drawers. One for notes and flashcards, one for his pencils and other stationary stuff, one for his medical things like the stethoscope you just gave him, and the bottom one for snacks.
Shawn smiled, “The one in my room is falling apart and very low on everything. This is actually kinda perfect.” he smiled, watching you bounce at his reaction.
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Back at the dorms, spring classes starting in a few days, Shawn helped you unpack all your things from your month up in the mountains. Everyone stayed up until the last minute. New Year’s Eve was spent at the lodge with everyone and some champagne. Honestly, you couldn’t have asked for a better Christmas.
“Hey babe, I have something I’ve gotta talk to you about. Can you come here for a minute?” Shawn asked, sitting on your bed. You nodded, setting your stuff on the bathroom counter and sitting on his lap. “Before we left for the lodge, I can a call from my sister that a good friend of mine back home, James, is really sick. He’s not doing very well, and asked if I could come visit for a while.” You watched his face as he spoke, grabbing his hands and rubbing along his knuckles gently. “Well he didn’t get any better and they don’t really know if he’s gonna make it and I really want and need to go up and see him in case he doesn’t pull through. So im gonna leave Tuesday and say there for about a week, I’ve already cleared it with the university. I just wanted you to know. It’s another reason I contacted my friend to talk to Rudy. While I’m there I’m gonna be focused on him and spending time with him, but I wanted to make sure you were taken take of in case you started having attacks.”
You looked at him and pulled him to you, kissing his head. “Baby I understand, I’m really sorry about your friend. I really hope he pulls through, and with you there I’m sure he will. You have a healing energy to you that goes further than your medical education.” He nodded and wrapped his arms around your waist. “If you need anything, let me know bubs. This comfort thing goes both ways here.” He smiled against you skin and pulled back to look at you.
“I love you so much. I’ll try to keep in contact with you as much as I can while I’m back home, and I really can’t wait to tell him and my family all about you.” You blushed, leaning in for a kiss.
“Don’t worry about me babe, focus on James and your family. You said so yourself, you set in a plan in case I needed someone. I’ll be okay.”
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You were definitely not okay. Shawn had left four days ago, saying it would be about another week before he returned, and here you were on the carpet of your dorm room trying to breathe. Nothing had really even happened, but the voices in your head were telling you that you weren’t good enough for this school and this profession and the love you were receiving from Shawn and your friends. You didn’t want to bother anyone in the middle of the night since all your friends were learning the ins and outs of their classes.
So you called the only person you could think of. “Hello?” He asked as he answered. He knew it was you, you’d been texting him all week, and after initial shock of talking to the man you watch on your tv, you actually started to become friends. “Hey, you okay?” his voice concerned at your hyperventilating on your end of the phone.
“Rudy? Can- can you tell me about what you did tod-today?” you hiccuped, wrapping the weighted blanket around yourself, it still had Shawn’s scent on it. “Or anything really.” You shook on the floor, listening Rudy talk about going to the beach and surfing.
After a few more minutes of listening to him, you were still freaking out, unable to block out the feeling you had. “Hey, I uh, I am in the L.A area, if you want to do something, so you’re not alone.” He suggested, and you shrugged. “How about we go to the beach?”
You thought about it for a while, “Yeah, okay. Maybe it’ll be good to get some fresh air.” You nodded, wiping your face and standing up.”
“Text me your dorm and I’ll pick you up. We can get food too.” He said and hung up. You quickly put on a swimsuit and a pair a jeans, slipping into one of Shawn’s shirts and wiping your face. It’s not like you wanted to look perfect for him, you really didn’t have the energy, but this was the first time he’d be seeing you and you didn’t want him to see how hard today had come down on you.
When you heard a knock on your door, you turned off your tv and make your way to the sound. As soon as you opened the door you were engulfed in a hug, ay first you were shocked, but you assumed he wanted you to know he was there for you. “Hey there, you okay?” he asked and pulled away, sure you’d seen him on tv and on the one facetime call you had, but seeing him in front of you was different. You’d never think about leaving Shawn, but you had to admit Rudy was good looking.
“Yeah, I’m really drained and honestly I’m still in the middle of an episode, but I think getting out might help.” He nodded, rubbing your back and looking at your swollen face. You felt really comfortable around him.
“You ready to go?” he asked and you nodded, grabbing your bag and locking your door. “I’m really sorry the first time we met you don’t feel great. Shawn’s friend told me all about you and what happened, and I really am sorry about it all. I really felt for you, I know a few other people that’s been through that as well.” You sniffled, looking around the parking lot, not sure what car was his. “I parked over here.” he smiled, opening the door to a Hummer. “It’s my rental for the next few weeks.” he explained.
You nodded, smiling at The 1975 on the radio. “I really like this song.” you mumbled and he turned it up, telling you he liked them as well. The ride was really fun, he played a lot of good music.
“So, do you want something to eat? I didn’t know if you got hungry after attacks, I know some people do and some puke at the thought of food.” You nodded, giggling a little as your stomach growled. “Sonic mozzarella sticks and fries?” he asked and you stared at him. “When you called I texted Shawn, he said that’s your favorite thing. You smiled at the mention of your boyfriend and he noticed, placing a hand on yours in a comforting way. “He knows you didn’t want to worry him while he’s home, but I wanted to make sure you were comfortable.”
Sitting on the beach with Rudy was really relaxing, you two just talked and you asked him about filming. He asked you about fashion and told you that if you didn’t get the internship with Calvin Klein he’d put in a word at the studio for you for set styling. “So, what exactly happened?” he asked, referring to the reason you called him at midnight.
“Well my ex actually goes to school here and when Shawn is here I can stay calm and feel safe, but with him gone I guess my safety net and strength went with him.” He pulled you into another hug and rubbed your arm gently.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t know you had to see him on a regular basis. That sounds really tough, but hey, you’ve got me know. This isn’t some charity case or something, I really care about you and I really think we could be good friends. If you need me at all while Shawn is gone or, obviously even when he gets back, just call. I’d really like to hang out with you when you’re feeling better too.”
You stayed there until you felt better, and were ready to go to bed. “Thanks again for coming to my rescue.” you said as you stood outside your door. He smiled and gave you one last hug, you assume Shawn told him the physical contact helped you, or maybe he just knew.
“Of course! Text me in the morning okay? Sleep well, I hope you feel better.” he said before getting back into the car and driving off after you’d made it safely inside. You really were grateful for Shawn and Rudy, but you didn’t want to sleep alone, so you did the best thing you could think of. You grabbed your key to Shawn’s room and slipped inside. You instantly decided to take a shower so you could use his shampoo before you crewled into him bed and inhaled his scent on the sheets. You couldn’t wait for Shawn to get back.
#shawn mendes#shawn peter raul mendes#shawn mendes fanfiction#shawn mendes au#shawn mendes writing#shawn mendes fic#shawn au#college shawn#med student shawn#my fic#stitches
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A/N: I’m having fun writing this. Part 3 of the @marveltrumpshate fic I wrote for @wombatking
Summary: There was something luxurious about waking up at 7:30am, to an empty room, with an empty bathroom, and the kitchen all to herself. Kitty hit the jackpot.
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There was something luxurious about waking up at 7:30am. Absolutely luxurious. Kitty wanted nothing more than to sprawl over her bed, languidly stretching before she finally rolled off. Unfortunately, her right leg was a dead weight to all of this, so she had to settle for lazily yawning and spreading her arms above her. The birds had been awake for hours, her dormmates equally so, and she had the most glorious sleep. She hadn’t even noticed when Rogue had left for training, her roommate for once not waking her up with her extensive morning prep.
For a girl who claimed that she didn’t care what others thought of her, she spent an awfully long time in front of the mirror. Kitty chuckled at the thought. Rogue was full of strange contradictions and the more she learned, the more she liked. It was strange to think that at one point they’d fought like cats and dogs.
Well, if Kitty were honest, they still fought sometimes now, but they always made up after.
It was harder than she expected, to get off the bed. Her leg felt weird, her movements even more so—her legs didn’t feel in sync, her left far too light and quick, her right too slow and heavy. Walking was a strange hop and dance. Dressing even more so. She half-wished she had Velcro pants, like the ones Spike used for his stupid “my pants ripped off!” joke. The only problem was that they were ugly. On the bright side, she was more than used to putting a little pain in for her fashion.
As she passed by a window, she caught sight of Jean and Amara running through the obstacle course, sweaty and tired. “Glad that’s not me,” she murmured, grinning as she stepped into the for-once-empty bathroom.
She’d been wrong. The best part of her broken leg wasn’t sleeping in, it was the fact that there was no rush. No one knocked on the door, asking her to get out. Kitty didn’t have to bounce impatiently on her feet, waiting for the door to open so she could rush in. Nope, the bathroom was all hers, for however long she wanted.
So was the kitchen, so was the tv—if she’d realized how good it was, she’d have broken her leg ages ago. Maybe in six weeks she could break the other one. Chewing on a piece of toast, she idly flipped through the channels. News, weather, Say Yes to the Dress, Psycho—
“Ready to go?” Scott said, suddenly appearing behind her.
Kitty almost dropped her toast, surprised. Instinctively, she turned off the TV, flushing a bright red. “I, that—” She wasn’t even sure why she was feeling flustered. This was fine! Technically allowed! No one expected otherwise!
Yet it was one thing to relax when no one was around, and another to do it in front of her slightly sweaty housemate. Scott’s hair might be carefully combed, but his skin still had a light sheen to it from all the exercise. Noticing her stare, he cocked his head. “What’s wrong?”
He’d always been a slightly dense brick. Fighting back her embarrassment, Kitty scarfed down her toast and stood up. “N-nothing. Let’s go.”
“Alright then. I pulled my car up front, so just slip in.” Scott picked up her backpack and slung it over his shoulder. “You know, instead of a reality show, you should try watching the news.”
If Kitty could have, she would have stomped to the car.
-x-
“Hey girl!” Kitty got no other warning before a pair of slightly tanned arms wrapped around her neck, hugging her tight. Tabitha pressed her cheek against Kitty’s, her messy hair tickling her neck. As usual, her perfume was as loud as she was. “Heard you got hurt.”
“Tabitha!” Kitty laughed, leaning into her friend. She’d been getting lonely anyways, sitting in the playground as she was. Kurt had gone to get lunch and unfortunately the track team wasn’t practicing, so she couldn’t even stare at them. “Did Amara tell you?”
“Didn’t have to, I have eyes.” Tabitha let go and rested her hands on her hips. “I hear Blue is now two for two for training accidents?”
“It was my fault this time, not his.” Kitty rubbed her neck sheepishly. To be honest, the other time hadn’t been entirely his fault either—Tabitha had a little to do with it. Gesturing at her leg, she explained, “I broke my leg, so now I’ve got that ugly thing.”
“I know training sucks, but I didn’t think you’d go that far to get out.” Tabitha whistled as she saw the cast. “Damn, that’s clunky.”
“I know, right! It’s like I have snowpants or something.” Kitty rapped on the top of her cast. “It’s so thick! I don’t want to know what’ll smell like after all of this heat.”
“You’re lucky it isn’t summer, or you’d be roasting in it.” Tabitha scrunched her nose, her lips curling with disgust. “Broke my arm once, on a job, and not only was I utterly useless after, I reeked like Toad.”
“Seriously?” Kitty didn’t have to ask to know what sort of ‘job’ she was referring to. Wincing, she looked at her cast again. Tabitha had to be exaggerating, right? “It’s not that bad, right? I can’t get it off for six weeks. I don’t want to deal with smell on top of everything.”
“Just spray some perfume on it.” Tabitha winked. She mimed spraying it on. “Works like a charm.”
“Eww.” Kitty glared at the offending cast, her heart sinking. Just how stinky could the thing get? She groaned. “So either I smell like Toad or a flowershop.”
“Hey, the choice is yours.” Tabitha grinned, shrugging. “I bet Logan won’t like either smell.”
“I don’t think Rogue or Kurt will like it either.” Resigning herself to her fate, she hoped they’d still hang around her after six weeks were up.
“Cheer up, it’s not that bad. You get a lot of sympathy goodies.” Tabitha crouched next to the cast, a marker in hand. She started doodling something, just out of Kitty’s sight. “People open doors for you, give you seats, sometimes even food—”
“You shouldn’t eat things strangers give you,” Kitty warned, worried about that last one. Sometimes, she was amazed Tabitha made it to high school. More often, though, she was impressed the school hadn’t burned to the ground multiple times, considering her short temper. “And what’re you drawing?”
“You’ll see!” Tabitha replied cheekily, her brow furrowed as she finished her masterpiece.
Kitty rolled her eyes. “Fine, keep your secrets.”
“I’m pretty good at that, ask anyone.” Tabitha smirked up at her. “How’re the geeks taking this? Bet Logan ain’t happy.”
“They’re like, the only bad part.” Kitty grimaced, remembering Scott’s lectures. And she had to get a ride from him for the next six weeks—her mornings were going to be so ruined. “I swear, Scott and Jean won’t shut up about it, and Logan’s just counting down the days till he can make me suffer again.”
Tabitha stood up now, laughing. “Sounds like ‘em.” Hand on her hip, she gave her a wry look. “Honestly, you should just ditch that whole scene and join me. It might not be the best place to stay, but it’s the funnest.”
There was absolutely no way Kitty was staying in that rundown house the brotherhood claimed was ‘livable’. She’d been there a handful of times, and each time she wasn’t sure how the place hadn’t been torn down. At the very least, it had to be filled with lice or something. “I’m not that desperate.”
“Yet.” Tabitha pocketed her marker and waved before waltzing away. “Lemme know if you change your mind.”
“Not happening!” Kitty laughed, watching as a garbage bin exploded.
-x-
Kitty lay on her bed, examining her cast by her tablelamp light. It was, perhaps, the first time she’d gotten to use that thing without having to cram for a test or something. Today was actually full of firsts—she finished her homework without having to rush, she had dinner on time, and hey, she saw an episode of her favourite drama on time instead of catching a rerun.
Even now, she was lying in her bed, at 11pm, and not bone-tired for once. Across the room, Rogue snored lightly as she slept, too tired from training to complain about the light. The house was utterly silent at that this time and if it weren’t for the lights-out rules, she’d have snuck around to see just how different the house was at night.
For now, she bent over her cast, running her fingers along the different signatures she’d collected. After Tabitha had signed it, the rest of her friends popped in, one after another, all ready to make a mark. The once white cast was now a collage of signatures and messages. Rogue had written her name in purple ink, with nothing else added to it, and Kitty couldn’t figure out if it was because she didn’t have anything she wanted to write, or if it was because she was too embarrassed to put anything.
Feel better soon, Honey, Kurt had written in blue ink, and Kitty smiled as she pressed her fingers on the pink heart he’d drawn beside his name. It was utterly cheesy, but she liked that about Kurt.
There was a picture of a grumpy Logan next to Spike’s name, and Kitty covered her mouth to muffle her laughter. He was a terrible artist, and that only made it funnier. Logan was either a furious hedgehog or he was some new evolution of a bear. Definitely not human, at the very least.
Finally finished with all the easy to read signatures, Kitty leaned forward and strained her neck to see what was on the back of her cast. More importantly, to see what Tabitha had spent so long drawing. Biting her tongue and squinting, she could just make out the picture.
It was a dick.
Of course it was. She flopped back on her bed, and silently swore revenge.
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