#like at one point i was just genuinely disgusted with her because like??? she fully condoned an artist for getting harassed??? for the

[dollarbils]

nothing like your tattoos | b.eilish

billie eilish x fem!reader

context. when you spend the night together, billie never fails to leave in a hurry.

warnings. angst, kind of suggestive, little bit of fluff (this is SO dramatic i’m sorry 🤧) not proof read

masterlist

her skin was sweaty as you traced her tattoos, baby hairs sticking to her forehead, and her chest beating up and down, to the softening rhythm of her breath, reminding you of previous events.

“okay, i gotta go baby, that alright?” even though she spoke as if it was, it wasn’t a question. but regardless, she made no attempt to move, no effort to escape your grasp.

“what do you think about me?” she raised her eyebrows, clearly confused.

“what do you mean?” riddled with your words, she awaited clarification. but when you didn’t speak, she grew worried.

“baby? what’s wrong?” her genuine concern never failed to fool you, trick you into believing her words of comfort. but the result was always the same. her absence.

“what am i to you?” she clearly didn’t like the sound of that question. unsure of its proper answer and naturally, of a response that would satisfy you.

“why would you ask me that?” disappointment spread across your features, unmistakably.

“you’re nothing like your tattoos.” she seemed amused now, puzzled by your misleading words.

“what do you mean?” she turned to look at you, careful not to move her hand as you traced the fairies that littered it.

“there’s nothing permanent about you.” her expression faded, a sense of sadness taking place instead.

“hey,” she caressed your face before speaking, demanding your attention, “i’ll stay, if you want me to.” and you knew it was honest. she would, she’d do it for you, but never of her own accord.

“that’s not what i want.” you sat up, and out of her grasp as she followed.

“then what do you want?” the question was too complicated for a simple response.

“i want you to want me.” her breath hitched slightly, almost faint enough to miss.

“i do want you.” she brought her hand to your face in attempt to comfort you. but her words were empty, meaningless. because she was never clear about her true feelings behind them.

“no you don’t, not really. i’m just a good fuck to you.” you said it like you were disgusted, disappointed in yourself for letting it get this far.

“good? don’t underestimate yourself babe, you’re a whole lot more than good.” a hint of humour could be found in her tone but it wasn’t amusing. not to you, not under the circumstances.

“billie, that’s not the point.” your saddened expression gave her the hint that the humour was misplaced.

“sorry, i just- i guess i just don’t know what you want from me.” she was lying through her teeth, fully aware of what you desired.

“oh please! you know exactly what i’m talking about.” she looked away for a second, taking a moment to think.

“i’m just not one for relationships. it’s too much for me.” she rubbed your cheek with her thumb, sending a river of mixed signals and emotions.

“well this,” you gestured between the two of you, “it’s too little for me. i can’t do this with you anymore.” you made a move to get up, shifting away from her, but she pulled you back by the arm.

“wait, no. i can’t lose you.” she seemed surprised by her own words, as if it was more of a reflex rather than a conscious expression of her feelings.

“that’s tough then, billie. because you’re not even willing to try.” when she didn’t say anything, nothing to confirm nor deny, you grew frustrated.

“whatever bils, I’m sorry i can’t keep this up. but it just hurts too much.” her eyes were teary when you turned away from her, your own tears now spilling down your face.

“i can’t promise permanence but i can promise you i’ll try.” she said it all at once, a desperate plea. you almost didn’t catch her words.

“what?” you turned around to look at her. her eyes were big, her lips plump. it was so hard not to fall in love with her.

“i just want to be with you. i don’t care how, i just need you in my life.” she chewed on her lip, a physical expression of her stomach churning out of anticipation.

“really?” your emotions neared disbelief. not quite sure if anything was real.

“yeah. please let me stay. i want to stay.” you nodded and she kissed you like you were hers. she kissed you like she wanted the feeling tattooed on to her lips forever.

taglist @adinda-eilish @ijustlovemaths @sweetcherriexs @jaxon-nathaniel-drake @mybluebossanova @diceroll65 @tothediner @st0nerlesb0 @bilssturns

[swallowtail-ageha]

The genshin evil character discourse girl (who was also different from the "if you watch made in abyss you are a pedophile girl" but somehow both ended up in the fucking same class as mine) would often try to pull me into shipcourse like abusive bakudeku oh my god isnt it gross that they ship siblings in the bsd fandom etc which again it was funny considering. My ship tastes but also like sometimes she'd be like "oh my god lets make fun of [this corny fanfiction/fanart] in the comments" and would get mad that i even dared to say "hey thats kinda mean"

[bicth-and-in-that-order]

Let’s talk about THAT CaitVi scene and the fandom’s response to it

All cards out on the table, I used to adore CaitVi. I was there in the trenches reading the fanfics, watching the shipping videos, even going on fucking dynasty scans for the fanart + doujinshis😭 (iykyk). I loved CaitVi down bad, and of all the things I was most excited for in S2, this ship becoming canon was near the top of the list. I say this to say I don’t come from a place of apathy or hatred when it comes to this ship, but just genuine disappointment and disgust for how it was mishandled in season 2. Particularly when it comes to the abuse.

In preparation of this rant, I did my homework to fully understand both sides. I watched this video:

Which explains Cait’s behavior and even addresses her physical abuse. And, as much as it pains me to say this, I looked through the CaitVi tag on tumblr and read as many posts as I could defending Caitlyn and CaitVi as a ship.

Before I begin, I think it would be fair to lay out the main defense before tearing into these people. So let’s talk about Cait:

The main thesis of “Stop Me Oh’s” video and many other CaitVi shippers is that Caitlyn is someone who doesnt like to communicate her feelings and thinks actions speak louder than words. By helping Vi without hesitation during Act 2 and putting aside her grief to allow Vi a chance to talk to Jinx, someone who murdered her mother, Cait is already showing immense remorse. She’s taking steps to make amends for her actions and proving that her love and trust in Vi outweighs her desire to get revenge. She doesn’t need to actually utter a single apology when she’s done more than enough to make up for her misgivings.

And excusing the whole fascist thing, ALL she did was hit Vi. She didn’t kill the poor thing like Jayce and they weren’t fighting to death like Ekko and Jinx:

And, let’s be honest, wouldn’t you do the same? Put yourself Cait’s shoes. Imagine your family was blown up by your partner’s crazy lunatic sister. You watched her turn your world upside down. And while your partner is fully supportive of hunting down your mother’s murderer, she suddenly switches up when it’s time to actually go through with it. She’s stopping you from shooting this deranged killer all because you MIGHT shoot some annoying child. And then you miss the best chance you’ll ever get to take down this terrorist and your partner comes crawling back to you, talking about how you’re just like that murderer. Then, in the heat of the moment, you hit her with the butt of your gun. You hit her and you abandon her in a hole while she cries on the ground. It’s harsh, but doesn’t she deserve it?

Don’t you see? Cait is a poor rich girl who lost her mother. Unlike these other murderers and thugs, all she did was hit Vi during a moment of passion and would never, ever, ever, ever, do it again. Vi should be grateful Cait even let her see her only family, she could’ve just fucking killed the bitch.

Okay. Jokes asides, let’s just address each of these points one by one.

1. Cait already apologized through her actions

This is the most common defense I see for Cait, and it’ll be the lengthiest one too.

So my question is: For what?

Ignoring the fact that verbally apologizing IS an action, how does Cait deciding not to pursue Jinx and allowing Vi to see her only family correlate to her making amends for the physical abuse?At the very least , I can see Cait siding against Ambessa and admitting she fell for propaganda as “apologizing” for her turning to fascism. I guess. But what is Cait atoning for exactly when she helps out Vi? I’ll try to explain what I think it is:

When Cait says Vi has Jinx’s blood, shoves her gun into her stomach, and leaves her in a ditch, that represents her no longer trusting Vi. Cait thinks she’ll choose Jinx over her. So later, when Cait sides with Vi and allows her to see Jinx, it’s shows that she’s willing to trust Vi again and her judgement of character. Which Vi understands. When we think about it this way, Cait hitting Vi isn’t read as “physical abuse” by the narrative because the physical act of violence isn’t the issue the writers are trying to portray. No, the issue is Cait no longer trusting Vi. Physical abuse was just used as a vehicle to convey Cait’s distrust of Vi, who she now sees as a stranger/enemy….for like, an episode or two, then switches up lol.

But my point in saying all of this is, Cait isn’t really “apologizing through her actions” about the physical abuse. In fact, that was never even a consideration. And no, we’re not going to brush it off by saying “well shouldn’t this count for Cait hitting Vi too”. If we’re to take physical abuse seriously, and WE ARE you freaks, this is an offense that Cait needs to address separately. Properly.

Imagine if someone punched you in the face then stole your cookies. They never apologize to you for anything, but over the following days, they buy you cookies, maybe even some milk. Do you think these actions are enough of an “apology” for punching you in the fucking face? If they are then you need some serious help.

Ah, and contrary to the popular belief that Cait doesn’t need to verbally apologize bc she shows her actions through words and yadda yadda yadda, Cait does, in fact, try to apologize in Jinx’s suicide cell. About fucking Maddie. Then she gets cut off. You would think Cait wouldn’t feel the need to apologize about Maddie since “aCtIonS sPeAk LoUdeR tHaN wOrDs” but I guess Cait picks and choose what she feels sorry about.

And I can already hear the counter argument. “It’s not about if I forgive Cait, but if Vi does since she’s the victim. Cait and Vi kiss and make up, and by the season’s end, they’re a couple. Therefore, Vi forgives Cait about everything.”

Putting aside the cycle of abuse, my question is: how does Vi feel about Cait hitting her? And vice versa. Since the fandom loves throwing “media literacy” around so much, let’s put that to the test. While the physical abuse is never brought up, hinted at, thought about, or addressed ever again (much like how the fandom treats it), that doesn’t mean we can’t talk about the implications.

If Vi doesn’t specifically mention the physical abuse, what does that mean for her character? Did Vi think she deserved it, or maybe she was just used to it, maybe she thought it was in the heat of the moment and Cait would never hurt her again (super toxic mindset btw), etc etc.

If Cait never mentions her physically abusing Vi, what does that mean for her character? Does she even care, does she think she was justified, did she think Vi could take it, why is Maddie the first thing she apologizes about and not hitting Vi and leaving her in a dank hole?

Because we could easily be getting into toxic/abusive territory, and when it comes to physical violence, there’s very little wiggle room for a more positive interpretation.

2. These characters aren’t perfect, they’re flawed

So this argument falls back on the “well pobody’s nerfect” defense and to that extent I agree. I think Cait is selfish and callous, but all the other characters who have similar flaws (think Silco, Marco, Ambessa, probably more) end up fucking dying and/or have actual narrative consequences. I’ve seen people argue that Cait losing her eye is a narrative consequence and IT IS for Cait’s alt right phase and choosing to follow Ambessa but it’s NOT for hitting Vi. Neither is Maddie betraying her. An appropriate narrative consequence would’ve been Vi leaving her ass, but I promise you the same people defending Cait would’ve had a thousand think pieces about how the writers sabotaged Cait’s character. Arcane is NOT a show about bad people getting away with bad things either.

3. Well Jayce killed Viktor / Ekko and Jinx tried to kill each other

So this argument acknowledges Cait’s abuse and her lack of apology but tries to deflect by claiming the other couples are violent, if not more. Even though this is a classic whataboutism, I’ll address it. I won’t acknowledge the timebomb side of the argument because it’s incredibly dumb, but for Jayvik, where do we begin? Recall that after Cait and Vi kissed, they were on romantic terms. That’s why Cait even bothers bringing up Maddie, and it’s really more so to let the viewer know Cait will excuse abuse but draws the line at infidelity. During Act 2, Jayce and Viktor are enemies and Viktor will literally kill everyone if he continues on his path. Jayce could have at least talked to Viktor first, but the writers chose to make him deranged or whatever so that was out of the question. And again, they’re enemies. Fighting isn’t off the table, even killing. If Viktor sucker punched Jayce while they were astral projecting together, then that might be analogous to Cait and Vi, but they don’t.

4. Not all relationships are perfect

This is one is similar to point two, but I’m taking a different angle. No, not all relationships are perfect, but I would never call physical abuse a “flaw” that’s to be expected in a normal, healthy relationship. Once you introduce violence, we call that abusive. I didn’t know we were in dire need of an abusive lesbian relationship, but I’ll walk with you.

If Arcane had the balls, CaitVi could’ve been portrayed as the toxic yuri couple it clearly is. They could’ve leaned into Vi being desperate enough to take Cait back and Cait not giving a single fuck about hitting Vi and leaving her. And if they did, this post wouldn’t exist. But they don’t. We’re genuinely supposed to like this slop and view it as a good thing because they kiss and play fun pop music while they fuck instead of the more appropriate “Poison” (by Bell Biv DeVoe ofc).

5. Well Jinx did XYZ to Vi

Another whataboutism. At risk of making this post longer than it already is, I’m gonna be brief. Yes, Jinx did awful things to Vi, but the narrative properly punishes Jinx for all of her actions (I mean the girl literally sacrifices herself) and wastes no time calling her out, especially Vi. Behind Cait, Vi is Jinx’s biggest hater. Literally chokes the girl out on sight. So let’s not pretend there’s some hypocrisy going on here, though it doesn’t escape me that many Cait fans end up being Jinx haters.

With that, I think I’ve covered all the major defenses for Caitvi’s physical abuse. All I can say is that the relationship is fucked and Vi deserves better.

[synthetickitsune]

Milk Swirls Of Destiny ✧ y.jh

Pairing: Yoon Jeonghan x reader (gn) Genre: coffee shop au, fluff Summary: Yoon Jeonghan is mildly inconvenient at best and infuriating at worst. He's somehow the worst and the best coworker you have. Definitely the most annoying. Word count: 6.8k Warnings: food mentions A/N: he just lives rent free and his pretty best friend too and @hanniedream is holding me hostage in brainrot (aka being my partner in crime and emotional support and muse here) [series masterlist] [next chapter - wip]

“Aaaah… I see now. Hm…” Jeonghan swirls the cup slightly, a look of concentration on his face.

“What- what is it?” the girl standing on the other side of the counter stumbles over her words. She’s looking at him with bated breath. Her hands are clasped together as if she was praying. As if she was looking at something holy. You scoff quietly and roll your eyes once you turn your back towards them. Like there’s not enough work to do.

“Look here,” Jeonghan says and points to the squiggly line where he messed up the milk pour for a flower design. His face is the mask of seriousness. “See the waves? Clear sign of turbulent times ahead. But it smooths out eventually - it looks a bit like a star here, see?”

No. No, it doesn’t.

“-That means you’ll succeed. Just hang in there.”

The girl seems on the verge of tears as she takes the cup from Jeonghan, clutching it with both hands as she thanks him relentlessly. It’s only after a couple minutes that she finally walks off with what has to be a cold and disgusting latte. 

You understand trying to predict the future from coffee grounds, tea leaves, whatever, but to do so from a milk pour in a latte made by a barista who couldn’t pour a heart if his life depended on it? 

“You’ll scare off the customers with that sour face,” Jeonghan nudges your ribs with his elbow once he comes stand next to you and finally starts helping you with the backed up orders.

“Yeah, and the thin ice you’re dancing on will break under you one day when the customers start complaining about their coffee being cold by the time you’re done with your little fortune teller charade,” you snap back. He snickers.

“Someone’s grumpy,” he hums, “I’m here now, we’ll have these done in no time.”

You’d like to believe him. You really would. But you’re annoyed and you know it’s only a matter of time before he runs off again.

It’s not his fault that the new guy called in sick last minute. The boss knows that it’s better to have at least one more person behind the counter whenever Jeonghan is working - partly because he’s busy with his fortune telling side hustle and partly because he brings in a lot of customers. A lot of customers. And without fail all of them become annoyingly obsessed with him, it’s only a matter of time. It’s fine as long as they only come in and stare at him, it’s the ones who have to have their coffee made by him and have him read their fortunes. Like he’s not just making shit up. You’d swear you saw some fan pages dedicated to him online. 

You guess the traffic he brings to the cafe is the only reason the boss is okay with him doing his thing and leaving the rest of you to struggle.

For now though, you work efficiently and neatly together. Working with Jeonghan, when he is doing his actual job, is always smooth. You don’t need to talk to get the orders to the waiting customers fast. At times like these you only have half a mind to cringe at the winks and apologetic smiles he sends to his flock of lovesick fans. Sometimes you want to tell him he’d get even more tips - like he’s not already getting a ridiculous amount - if he let his fingers brush against theirs, but whenever you open your mouth to do it, you can’t. Your stomach twists when the words make it to the tip of your tongue. It must be because you couldn’t witness that without gagging.

“See? We’re doing so well,” he hums proudly, and you fully intend to give him a genuine smile back. You really do. That is until you see the customer he’s handing the cup to. He frowns a little at the way your face falls and your lack of reaction. Before he can say anything, though, the girl squeals: “You’re the one who can read the future, right?”

It honestly looks like she’s meeting an idol. To be fair, Jeonghan has all the predispositions to be one and has the professionalism to match. You’d think the flustered but excited smile he gives the girl is genuine if you didn’t know any better. He always gives them conspicuous smiles like his role is a secret between the two of them. Like he feels seen by them. You sigh, your smile purely professional while you hand the glass to the other customer and simply motion towards the straws and sugar packets. And then you rush to work on the next drink.

Jeonghan breaks character for just a second to give you an apologetic smile - which you pointedly ignore. You’re too busy. Just one scan of the growing line and pool of waiting customers is enough to tell you Jeonghan won’t be helping you any time soon.

And eventually, any time soon turns into well after rush hour, with the most dedicated - and delusional - fans forming a line of their own just to get the most useless fortune reading of their lines. 

It’s honestly admirable in its own way that he acts with the same dedication with all of them, no matter how many there are. Right now though, you finally get to sit down and can’t be bothered to try and think anything good about him. You feel abandoned. Betrayed.

You know you’re the one being dramatic now, but you can’t help it. Your social battery is drained. 

You didn’t even get to go on lunch break - you couldn’t leave the other newcomer, Chan, there alone. No way he could handle both taking and making the orders. He hasn’t even been properly trained for that yet. And it feels like Jeonghan slacked off the whole time. Honestly you had no idea how this could be profitable for the owner but hey, it’s her business and not yours.

You’re still sulking when you finally take off the apron and your work shoes. Even walking to the station and walking home doesn’t seem appealing right now, but you really need a nap. And a nice warm meal. Still, you can’t find the energy or will to pack your stuff, so you’re just zoning out for a couple minutes. Which turns out to be a mistake.

The door flies open to reveal a disheveled Jeonghan. His hair is a mess, like he’s been the one getting through the rush. Once he sees you, however, he breathes out seemingly in relief and smoothes down his birdnest of a hair with his free hand. In the other he’s holding a cup of something iced. 

“I thought I didn’t make it,” he smiles at you, carefully coming closer. You heave a long and exhausted sigh.

“Leaving all the work to the others again?” you say, and although you try to sound unbothered, there’s a bitter edge to your voice. He frowns a little, turning his head towards the door for a second.

“I made sure no one was there when I left,” he shifts his weight, “And I just wanted to bring you this. As a thank you and a sorry.”

He offers you the cup in his hand and you take it. Or you’d like to before he steps a little closer and his eyes fill with that mischief you’re so used to seeing during his interactions with the customers.

Not this again…

“If you look here,” his finger draws a swirl above the transparent lid, “See how it looks like those curls want to tie together? A clear sign someone’s trying to court you. And they must be close.”

While he explains, Jeonghan keeps his eyes on the coffee but once he’s finished he looks at you. His gaze is so hopeful, so so hopeful, and you remember it working on you the first couple tries. It gets old after a while, though.

“Yeah, thanks for the coffee,” you shut down his efforts and take the cup from him, “For what it’s worth, I’d prefer for someone to have my back when it’s busy.”

“I’m sorry,” Jeonghan blurts out. He frowns again when he sees how resigned you look, licking his lips uncertainly. “I’m sorry I made you do all the work. I didn’t mean to.”

“Yeah, I bet you didn’t. Like you didn’t mean to on Monday, or last week, or literally any other day we were short on people,” you roll your eyes. Finally you get the motivation to take your things from the locker and leave. 

“Arguably, the cafe being short staffed is the issue here,” he says almost sheepishly - and visibly regrets it the moment you scoff and set the coffee down to cross your arms on your chest. “What?”

“‘Being short staffed is the problem’ yeah - yeah you can argue that and lose the fucking argument because we only need the extra person because you’re no fucking help,” you snap at him, throwing your bag over your shoulder and slamming the locker shut after hurriedly throwing things in. Jeonghan opens and closes his mouth, the corners of his mouth downturned and eyes wide. “Goodbye Jeonghan. See you Friday.”

You push past him and leave, waving at the poor cashier left stuck here with him. 

Jeonghan looks after you until the door closes and the loud noise makes him jump. He looks at the cup left behind, dripping water on the bench. He groans, sitting down with his head in his hands. He rubs his face, knowing he shouldn’t linger here. You might be gone, but his chest feels tight anyway. Now more than ever, like he’s just proving you right by wasting his time here where he is of no help to anyone.

He picks up the cup sadly and takes a small sip. It’s the best one he made, it shouldn’t go to waste. It’s just the way you like it, your favorite he thinks, yet it doesn’t make him feel any better or like you’re still here with him. 

When he returns to the front, a customer has just finished ordering - an older man, and Jeonghan immediately proceeds to prepare the order. His mind is blank but his heart feels heavy. You didn’t even taste the drink…

“Did you seriously just disappear to the back to drink your coffee?” Chan whisper-yells at him after he hands the order to the customer. Jeonghan is about to argue but then he realizes how pathetic he’d sound and just laughs.

“Eyy, I returned just in time, didn’t I?” he bumps his hip against the newbie’s. 

“Dude, you’re just flirting the whole day. Me and y/n did all the hard work, do you really think you’re the one who deserves a coffee break?” his coworker sighs and takes a rag to wipe down the counter. His smile falls immediately and suddenly it’s hard to swallow.

Way to go, Yoon Jeonghan…

Although you don’t work with Jeonghan again until today, you can’t say you feel any better. It’s not like you hate the job - actually you quite like it. The pay’s decent, the boss is fine for the most part, and your coworkers are all nice people too. At the same time you’d lie if you said you wouldn’t rather stay home and sleep and that your stomach doesn’t feel uncomfortably nauseated just thinking of another shift with Jeonghan. Your only hope is that it’s Friday and those usually aren’t as busy in the area. And it’s your last shift for the week. You can do this.

You wash your face and pray. There’s not much else you can do.

The least you can do is to use your limited control over the situation to take the last possible bus so that you make it in time. So you do. Every minute of peace counts. And although it does make you anxious to imagine being late, it’s not like you come late regularly - you never did, actually. So not a big deal. Maybe it’d show Jeonghan what it feels like to be all on his own.

For a while longer, you let the world fade into the background with music blasting in your headphones. It’s easier to ignore people if you can’t hear them. You push it, only giving Chan and Joshua behind the counter a friendly wave to greet them while you pass them. 

You push it further, opening the door to the staff room. You keep the music on until the last moment, until you open your locker and pull out your shoes and stuff your things in, and then you have no choice but to turn the music off and return to reality.

The first sound to reach your ears is annoying high-pitched whining complemented by a fluff of blond hair buzzing around you.

“You’re so mean,” Jeonghan complains, “Are you ignoring everyone today or just me?”

The temptation to just keep your mouth shut is so strong but you never learn. You still have hope that today will be better. And then you’ll need to get along with him. You’re closing the place together too…

Luck seems to be on your side for now, however, and lets you keep him waiting without any need for an excuse.

“My condolences, y/n. He’s so annoying today - he kept bugging us at the front before you came,” your savior, Joshua, declares right as he comes in and heads for his locker.

“Hey-”

“Are you leaving Chan there alone?” you quirk a brow at the newcomer while you change your shoes and throw on a fresh apron. It’s mostly just an excuse to ignore Jeonghan for a bit longer. But also it’s not like Joshua to skirt his duties.

“He can handle himself for five minutes,” he shrugs, “He’s a quick learner and it’s basically empty.”

You hum and snicker, “So was Vernon and you know how that went.”

Joshua shakes his head with a laugh while Jeonghan, very much cosplaying a fluffy and persistent bee, hovers closer to you at the edge of your vision.

This is a conversation he could join in but he doesn’t want to join in on a conversation you have with Joshua - he wants to talk to you! Alone! 

“Aren’t you supposed to be clocking out?” Jeonghan snorts in the direction of the other man. Joshua smirks, leaning against the lockers.

“Aren’t you supposed to be clocking in? I bet there’s already a line waiting for you,” the other never backs down from whatever Jeonghan throws his way. It’s impressive. It’s what he likes about the guy. It’s a challenge and he enjoys one. Even now, he’d bite back - oh, he would. But from the corner of his eyes he can see how your face falls just a little.

“Well, they can all wait because first, I’m gonna do a very exclusive reading for our dear y/n here,” he can’t let you see him weak and he can’t lose, and by changing the direction, he’s definitely not-

“Nah, thanks, I’d rather Shua does it,” you smile at the other man.

Now it’s turn for Jeonghan’s face to fall. Not like you will notice.

(It feels like a dagger to the back. The boss had this big idea of having more people on rotation for those readings, and with his acting skills and similarly mischievous personality as well as good looks, Joshua was the obvious choice. Jeonghan poured his heart into teaching him. Their back and forths were on another level, Joshua truly was the perfect student and the only one who could possibly match Jeonghan’s skill. Unfortunately, Joshua is also fucking crazy and his readings were anything but the wholesome, uplifting messages meant to comfort and heal that Jeonghan is trying to hand out. So in the end, Jeonghan alone is the chosen one.)

Joshua laughs back, throwing out a casual “anytime” that makes Jeonghan gag.

“y/n,” he whines, propping his chin on your shoulder - and he knows it’s just the surprise that stops you from immediately shrugging him off but whatever - “But he’ll just tell you you’re gonna grow a third eye or something. I’ll give you the truth.”

“If I had a third eye, I’d be able to see when we’ll get busy so I can, I don’t know, slip and break my leg and go home,” you roll your eyes and now you shrug him off and he pursues his lips more. 

Is it really that bad?

“We’d miss you here, you’re one of the good ones,” Joshua smirks at you and checks his watch, “Time to go! Good luck, both of you.”

Jeonghan hears you grumble something along the lines of ‘like he needs it’ way too clearly. He lets you walk in front of him, so he can sigh without you noticing. Joshua pats his shoulder while he passes him and gives him a kind smile. He hates how easy it is to like the guy.

Fortunately the cafe remains virtually empty when you come out, so you greet Chan again but with a genuine smile for a change. He seems to notice and beams at you too.

“Shua said you did well today,” you hum, trying to warm up to the newest addition to the team. Safe for the dude who’s still sick and you haven’t seen before. You don’t even remember his name.

“You know Shua, he’s just kind,” Chan dismisses, but there’s a happy sparkle in his eyes. One that is very much missing in Jeonghan’s - a fact which goes unnoticed.

He goes through the motions of cleaning the counter even though it’s sparkling clean. He refills the beans even though the container is full. He checks the labels and everything is in order…

“What’s up with him?” the cashier nods towards him. You shrug.

To be fair, Jeonghan works hard. Usually he’s pretty cheerful too, but now he’s just a lifeless husk and you wonder if it has anything to do with you basically ignoring him. Maybe you were too harsh on him when he was just being friendly.

“Anything needs a refill? Do we need anything from the back?” you slide closer to the man in question and take the rag from his hands. He looks surprised but before you can even blink, he’s smiling at you and smirking mischievously.

“Are you hinting I should go get it myself? That’s so mean,” he grumbles. He’s giving you a very convincing kicked puppy look but it’s not like there’s anything he needs to convince you about. Safe for his competency maybe, but that would take much more than him acting cute.

“I’d do it myself. This is just me giving you a chance to pull your stuff out.”

He grimaces a little, as if he forgot about it. Still he thanks you quietly. This one you can’t blame on him; it was just another of your boss’ bright ideas.   

‘Jeonghan’s stuff’ is really just a cloth, a nice deep shade of purple with golden embroidery of sun and moon and some more astrological motives that he spreads out on the area of the counter where he does the readings. It’s also an assortment of crystal candy handmade by Minghao.

(Minghao is only a part-timer and has the least hours of all of you, and occasionally you somehow go the whole month without seeing him once. You wonder if it has anything to do with the time he needs to make the candies.

They don’t match the cafe’s vibe - they look too luxurious, especially next to the plain looking macarons, roll cakes, cookies and other goodies - but they do fit Jeonghan’s vibe.

They’re delicious too, so you hope that whatever is Minghao’s contract doesn’t change. Although he could give out employee discounts.)

Anyway, Jeonghan’s corner isn’t much, and thank god it’s not flashy, but it’s a little extra something for whenever Jeonghan’s working. You usually notice some of his groupies peeking in through the front window to check if his stuff is out. It’s also a good way to tell if the day will be a good one or not if he’s in.

“Found something we need from the back?” Jeonghan joins you right as you’re finished going through the supplies.

“No, I think we’re good. Shua usually leaves everything ready for the next shift anyway,” you hum, double checking the dates on everything just to be sure. Not that you expect to find anything amiss.

“You’re so nice to him.” You roll your eyes at him before you can stop yourself, which Jeonghan takes a personal offense to. “I always do my best too!”

“Yeah, but Shua is just more reliable,” you shrug. Unswayed by his sulking, you keep working around Jeonghan, who follows you while listing all the nice things he’s ever done for you. You catch Chan watching you from the side and laughing. 

“If you have nothing better to do-”

Just as you’re about to find a task to give to the youngest, the doorbell rings and in walks a pair of friends. Their giggling and badly hushed squeals tell you everything you need to know.

“Better get in the character,” you say, already giving up, and move on to the cake display and check the temperature. The display cooler is new, but after the fiasco that was the last one you want to make sure.

“What do you mean by character?” he puts a hand over his chest. He’s already acting, though. “I just have powers nobody can explain.”

You scoff, almost bumping into him while he keeps shuffling on the floor. He’s just doing it to get on your nerves at this point.

“What the hell?” you hiss at him quietly.

He looks at you for real. The look in his eyes is close to desperate when his gaze flicks towards the girls and then back to you, standing conveniently between them and him. You only laugh a little. It’s ridiculous how dramatic he’s being, and you wonder why he has to be this eccentric all the time.

“Not ‘hell’, they’re powers from a higher good! And I wasn’t kidding yesterday,” he remains serious - whatever his version of serious is anyway, “There’s someone really close to you who’s interested in you.”

You don’t really want to indulge his delusions but since he’s still behaving like a child seeing his least favorite relative and the girls are taking ages ordering, you decide just once won’t hurt.

“Yeah? Tell me more,” you say simply.

At this point he’s basically cornered against the counter and the girls keep looking your way. There’s very few options left how he could cower from them. He seems more focused on you, however, delight written all over his face.

“Literally so close that when you realize you’ll feel so stupid you’ll want to bang your head against a wall.”

“Already do,” you sigh.

You might say that but there’s something charming about the way Jeonghan tenderly holds onto your sleeve, the way his head isn’t buried in your shoulder but you feel his every breath on your skin anyway. He’s careful not to press himself against you and you appreciate that, even though you’re long since you used to people being squeezed together behind the counter on the busier days. His current position makes your work much harder nonetheless. Though you suppose you’re just making yourself look busy at this point.

Not that you’re not grateful to Joshua, but damn, couldn’t he leave at least something for you to do without customers around?

“Yeah? Any guesses who could be your secret admirer?” Jeonghan whispers. The girls are paying already and you have no idea what he's hoping to accomplish. They’ve seen him already when they walked in and they see him now.

Fortunately they sprint over before the silence after his question gets long enough that it’d demand you to answer.

Like somebody flipped a switch in Jeonghan’s brain, he springs us from behind you and greets the girls at his corner, asking them for just a moment to let him work his magic.

You join Chan in Jeonghan-watching while he works after he sends you away to prepare the order himself. Not that unusual, although you’d like to have something to do so that the shift passes quickly. It always pleases the fans, though, and this time too it doesn’t fail to make them swoon over his long fingers, his tongue flicking out to wet his pretty lips, or the bow tied on the small of his back that looks so cute and accentuates his slim waist. It’s always this way. You think you learned what they’re into quite well. And it’s not difficult to see. 

You’re just more used to it now.

“Do you think my training could include some one-on-one with him?” Chan whispers to you, “I mean I have no problem getting a date if I want to-”

“You must be really against dating right now then,” you can’t resist teasing him. You have no idea if he’s dating or not, but you suppose if he wants Jeonghan’s help of all people, he must be desperate. Then you remember he’s just a newbie. He doesn’t know him well yet.

“Hey!” he punches your shoulder lightly, “It’s just- He’s on another level, okay?”

“I guess,” you murmur, “But he’s still as single as us, so he must be a loser beyond getting a number.”

“You think so?” he tilts his head, “Makes sense.”

“Yeah, so you just do you.”

Fridays tend to be slower, what with most of the students from the nearby university preferring a club to a small cafe by the time the end of the week rolls around, but it’s just as well. At least you get to show Chan how to do things properly whenever a learning opportunity comes around and for once it’s Jeonghan who has his hands full with work. So much so that both you and the cashier help - at least when all the customers are waiting to get their coffee and reading.

There’s not much you can do to actually help, but whenever you slide the plated desserts on the counter, ready to be matched with the coffee, prepare the boxes for the takeout orders, or you hand him a cup only waiting for him to mess up the milk, he gives you a grateful smile. You think that when your fingers brush occasionally, he might be doing it on purpose - occasionally here being an understatement, but it doesn’t happen all the time either. Whatever, you suppose that’s his own way of saying thanks. 

Slowly, though, even that crowd starts to thin out. 

Back when he used to work here, Seungkwan would always say that seeing Jeonghan and getting a cake were both a sweet treat for the students coming here on Friday evening. 

You wonder if they’d think of him as sweet if they were forced to work with him and deal with his whining.

It’s not that you want to entertain his quirks when you let him rest his head on your shoulder after the place empties. It’s just for now. And when you pet his hair whenever he sighs deeply, you’re just being a supportive coworker. It’s just that he really did work hard.

Jeonghan’s other shenanigans and the shit he puts whoever is unlucky enough to be on the shift with him through make it easy to forget the effort he puts into what he does. All the talking, making stuff up on the spot, the creativity that requires. You don’t think you could ever match that - especially with your social battery being as faulty as it is. And whenever he can, he insists on preparing the orders entirely by himself - and whenever he abandons you to the rest of the orders, even this is a big help. He never really complains either, his sighs and whining are mostly for attention.

Perhaps you’re too harsh on him sometimes. He doesn’t have it easy, just the same as you. 

“We’re almost done,” you pet his hair one more time and wave goodbye to Chan. For the remaining two hours, it’s gonna be just you and Jeonghan. The man on your shoulder doesn’t bother to lift his head and blindly waves as well.

You look around the cafe, empty safe for a single man at the table in the corner. He looks like he’ll be leaving soon too. It’s a relief, especially after the catastrophe that was your last shift together.

It’s been a while since you last closed with Jeonghan, however, so you can only hope that in the little time you have left he won’t do anything that would sour today’s experience. 

“If we start now, we’ll be finished sooner,” you whisper to him, and finally he raises his head. Over the couple months you learned that nothing motivates him quite like the prospect of going home soon. At least one thing you have in common.

“Do you want to do the clean up here?” Jeonghan suggests, but his tone couldn’t be more hopeful that you’ll say no. You huff and shake your head.

“It’s fine, I’ll just do the lobby and help you out when I’m done,” you grant his wish. Truthfully you don’t really care either way. And at least on lobby duty you get to have some space and walk around.

He thanks you cutely, promising another free reading just for you - which you immediately decline, but you know better than to expect him not to go through with it.

The time you have left passes in a breeze. Barely anyone comes in and when they do, they usually take their coffee to go. Stars really must have aligned for you today. Thus you get to wipe down the tables and the counter, clean the bathroom and sweep the floor before it’s officially closing time. You’re so excited by how lucky you’ve gotten that you don’t mind Jeonghan’s victorious smirk when you automatically take over some of his tasks once the clock strikes the closing time. After all it doesn’t matter that he gets to go home sooner when it’s a win for you too.

Once again you’re amazed by how smoothly you work with him. It’s an effortless flow without the need for words. Sure, the tasks you’re capable of doing on autopilot, but whenever you help out the others, it’s never this simple. 

“Thank you,” Jeonghan smiles at you once everything is done and you join him at the back after checking again that you haven’t forgotten anything. 

“Don’t mention it,” you return the smile and stretch your arms above your head, closing your eyes in bliss. You can’t wait to be home.

“No, I will - I promised, didn’t I?”

You don’t like his tone. You really really really don’t like his tone. Allowing your arms to go limp, you let them hang beside your body. Your eyes stay closed.

“Come on, it’s nothing bad,” his voice softens. Maybe you get why he’s so popular. Or maybe it’s late and you’re tired.

When you open your eyes, there’s a small cup of ice latte being held out to you. You frown but he just chuckles. “I kept it in the fridge.”

“And I was wondering why you were acting so weird,” you sigh but you take the cup - or try to, only he doesn’t let go. “Not again.”

“If you look here,” he dismisses your protests. His fingers are cold against yours. “That line and this line are almost one, see? Your secret admirer is closer than before. You should take your chance.” 

You try not to smile but you do anyway, tired and resigned to your fate. “Anything more?”

“Yeah, actually if you follow this… You’re not listening, are you?” Jeonghan pouts when he realizes that you’re not looking at the coffee at all. He holds your gaze.

“Thank you, I really appreciate this,” you finally manage to slip the cup from his hand. You immediately take a long sip, you need something to get you through the way home. It’s good, great, but that’s no surprise. He might not be trained in latte art, but he makes good coffee.

“What are you going to do about your admirer though?” he wiggles his eyebrows at you. You give him a long look and note the discrepancy in his body language and his voice. He sounds playful, the upward curl of his lips give off that feeling too, but he seems tense otherwise. His eyes seem nervous. The late hour must be getting to him too.

“Wait,” you shrug, then elaborate when he gives you a confused stare, “I’m not into this kind of game, Jeonghan. If someone likes me, they shouldn’t be hiding it.”

He looks caught off guard, his mouth hanging open slightly.

“That is - if there was a secret admirer. I’m not buying your nonsense,” you push his shoulders and turn to your locker with a satisfied smile to take your things and stuff the rest in. Finally you silenced the great charlatan Yoon.

“Hey, my predictions always come true,” he bounces back quickly, “The customers tell me all the time.”

“You literally tell them the most generic shit,” you roll your eyes, shutting your locker, “Look, it was really nice today, so let’s not fight.”

He opens his mouth with, displeasure tugging at his lips. There’s a moment of tense silence before he eventually settles on a short dramatic monologue about never being taken seriously by close minded people like you. You watch him while you sip the coffee and check your watch. There’s enough time before your bus comes and now that your last shift of the week is over, you feel relaxed enough not to mind his company.

You make sure to lock up the place and have Jeonghan check that it’s actually locked. Just to be sure, despite the teasing that follows. There’s no malice in his voice, if anything he looks fond and nudges you with his elbow, reassuring you that he only finds it cute.

Sipping on the coffee while you walk, you enjoy how peaceful the night is. The street is empty, safe for the two of you, but you know it’s not gonna be that way once you reach the main road. For now, though, you actually feel quite comfortable chatting with Jeonghan. He's good company when he’s not infuriating.

“So anyway, I won them the whole game,” Jeonghan finishes boasting about his recent outing with Joshua and the new guy you have yet to meet - apparently he’s called Jun and is hopeless at basketball.

“Sure you did,” you snicker. Just to see him whine and try to persuade you he’s not lying. Although unexpectedly you have to admit that seeing him act out some complicated moves without the ball is both amusing and strangely impressive. He never striked you as someone as athletic as he seems to be. 

“Alright, alright, I believe you. Don’t hurt yourself, you’re working the weekend, aren’t you?” you laugh, holding him by the elbow to stop him from more demonstrations. 

“Yeah, jealous hm?” he frees his arm from your hold and throws it around your shoulders. You scoff and shrug him off. 

“Not really, the older I get the more I value my free time over money,” you push him away when he moves too close again. He just laughs at the annoyed glare you give him.

“You know I think your secret admirer is tied to the cafe, so maybe you should come in. Make sure there’s someone to grow old with you,” he hums thoughtfully, but the look in his eyes lets you know he actually means the suggestion.

“No thanks, I’ll be happy not to see the place for a few days,” you wave him off. The ice clashes together as you shake the almost empty cup. Just in time. The main street is already in sight and with it, the bus stop too. Only a few minutes now and you’ll be on your way home, spacing out with your music. “Also you’re more obsessed with this idea of a secret admirer than me. Maybe you should confront one of yours.”

“What do you mean?” he stops walking suddenly. You stop too, your brows furrow on their own. He looks the most serious you’ve ever seen him. Actually serious.

“Your army of fans, duh,” you shrug, keeping your tone playful to hopefully lighten the atmosphere, “I bet every single one of them is in love with you. They’re not exactly discreet.”

He puts his hands on his hips and takes a deep breath, then exhales just as slowly. If it wasn’t him, if you didn’t know him as well as you think you know him, you’d be scared. Even so you watch him warily.

“I don’t care about them,” he says plainly, “It’s fun for the job, but I don’t care about anything beyond that.”

You swallow uneasily, watching him stare at you with an unreadable expression.

“I was just kidding. I’m sorry,” you apologize. He must notice how uncomfortable you feel because he runs a hand through his hair and gives you a small smile.

“I didn’t mean to scare you,” he catches up with you, “I just take my magic very seriously.”

You burst out. You’ve had people call latte art magic. Never the fuck ups. At least Jeonghan seems relieved to see you laugh too and you can continue the walk comfortably again.

For someone who spent the day making shit up, he has enough inspiration to keep going. By the time you reach the stop and the bus comes into view, you have tears in your eyes as Jeonghan keeps exaggerating and telling you, very seriously, about the inner workings of his magic and deals he had to make with different deities to acquire his powers.

He only shuts up when the bus stops in front of you and the doors open.

“Thank you for today, Jeonghan,” you babble through fits of laughter, “It was great.”

“Thank you too,” he smiles gingerly, “And don’t laugh at me. Or you’ll make some powerful enemies.”

“I don’t doubt that,” you shake your head, “Bye now.”

“Bye.”

You get on the bus and take a seat by the window. Jeonghan doesn’t move from his spot, you see him get smaller and smaller as the vehicle takes off. 

Despite the coffee, you feel tired. Tired but happy, you realize. You wipe your eyes and chuckle. If only every shift could be like this.

You keep grinning even as you put on your headphones and start the music. The glass is cold against your forehead and you hope it’ll keep you from falling asleep. Although you suppose it wouldn’t be so bad now that you feel this content.

The weekend passes by way too quickly. The bed remains unmade and the couch remains a messy nest of blankets and pillows, although that’s hardly surprising seeing as that’s where you spend most of the time. Some chores got done, some didn’t, but you tell yourself that’s fine. You’ll just do them before or after work, it’d be pointless to waste your completely free days on things like that. Starting on Monday sounds better than starting on Sunday night.

Some part of you feels guilty about not being more productive, but when you lay down in bed, you realize that you hold no tension in your shoulders and you remind yourself you’re not a machine. You need to rest too. Chores will wait. Being productive will wait. What needs to be done isn’t going anywhere - the time you get to spend on your hobbies is.

You settle in bed and set up the alarm for tomorrow. You don’t work until afternoon and you’re going to bed early, but you’d rather be safe than sorry.

Staring at the ceiling, you don’t think you’re gonna fall asleep any time soon, but that just can’t be helped. Just closing your eyes should provide some rest, and who knows, maybe your body will surprise you.

It’s hard to keep track of time with your eyes closed and your mind racing. You’ve already thought of six sick burns that you wish you had ready when you needed them, you’ve won two philosophical debates, and you were about to invent a life changing knick-knack if only your phone didn’t light up and didn’t alert you to a new text message.

You consider ignoring it. Nobody really texts you, so it’s most likely just some spam or they got the wrong number.

But then it rings again.

And again.

You pick up the phone and squint at the screen.

The messages keep going.

[godmadeaterribleerror]

The Only Place That I Call Home - No Love Love Bonus Chapter

Series Masterlist

Read on A03!

Author's Note: The real tragedy in No Love Lost is The Boys having to watch Her and Ben pretend they're capable of being normal about each other. Title from Heartlines by Florence and the Machine.

Word Count: 3.2k

Summary/Warnings: It's team game night, and everyone is sick of you and Ben's shit. Takes place in Chapter 24. Usual warnings.

Tags: Soldier Boy/Supe!Female Reader, canon divergence, tooth-rotting fluff, pre-established relationship, smut (blowjob, some fingering, p in v sex)

“We’re not playing codenames,” MM snapped. “The ban is fucking permanent, so drop it.”

“It’s a stupid ban,” She muttered, glaring at Ben’s hand as she turned it over between her fingers. It was hard to focus when She touched him like that. So natural and thoughtless, like he’s only an extension of her. He might be. She was perfect, and Ben would gladly just be a fucking extension of her. There wouldn’t be another goddamn idiot pussy he’d rather just be a weapon or tool of. “You’re just a sore loser-“

“We ain’t sore losers, Love,” Butcher snapped. “We’re just bloody sick of you always winning. Because you fuckin cheat.”

Ben almost snorted at the look of indigence on Her beautiful face. It was adorable, how She looked so genuinely offended by the very idea that she’d ever cheat, when they both knew that she cheated at almost every goddamn game they played with the team. Codenames is just the only one everyone else has caught.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” She stuck her chin up at Butcher, and it would be regal if she wasn’t full of such fucking bullshit. “I’ve never cheated in my life, Butcher, and I’m wounded you’d think that low of me.“

“I’ve thought a lot fuckin lower,” Butcher drawled Her name, and she scowled. “And you are cheatin. Because that cunt,” Butcher nodded to Ben. “Always helps you.”

Her hand folded fully over Ben’s as she held Butcher’s glare. “Last time we were on different teams-“

“And that motherfucker sabotaged everyone for you,” MM grunted. “No fucking codenames.”

Her sharp eyes turned to Ben. Are you going to fucking defend our honor.

You don’t have honor, Sunshine. He grinned, kissing the top of Her head. And we do cheat. All the fucking time.

I don’t make you cheat-

My loyalty is to you. He shrugged. Not whatever pussies I get put on a stupid fucking team with. And you never complain-

Because I like winning, Benjamin, and-

You don’t have any fucking honor.

Fuck you.

At the dinner table? In front of everyone? He raised his eyebrows, smirking down at her pretty, flushed face. That’s fucking disgusting-

I hate you.

No you don’t. Ben smirks, pulling her closer to his side. You love me.

I do, She sighed, whacking his arm before dropping her head on his shoulder. You’re such a fucking asshole, but I do.

“You twats want to clue us into your secret bloody brain sexting-“

“No.” She shot Butcher a glare, and he was smart enough to just wink back. “If it’s not codenames, what are we doing.”

“We could do Monopoly-“ 

Annie shook her head, cutting Hughie off. “Butcher always wins Monopoly, and he’s always a smug ass about it after.”

“It ain’t my fault I got killer business instinct-“

“I think you’re just a heartless dick,” Annie shrugged. “Only psychos are good at Monopoly-“

“You’re just real fuckin salty, Starlight, cause you hate admittin I’m good at somethin-“

“Oh, shut up-“

“What about Clue?” Frenchie cut off Annie this time, flinching slightly at her glare. “My apologies Annie, but I would like to begin with a game before it becomes midnight-“

“No Clue,” MM grumbled. “Those two cheat with that one as well.”

Ben decided not to punch MM, because they did in fact cheat at Clue, and Her annoyed pout made him want to pick her up and suck on her lips until she moaned, and they did end up fucking at the dinner table.

Ryan raised his hand slightly. “Could we, um, could we do Uno? I like Uno.”

The table fell silent, nobody willing to point out that She and Ben would almost certainly be cheating at Uno when Ryan looked so fucking hopeful, and Her glare made it pretty damn obvious she’d kill anyone who shot the idea down.

“I can do Uno,” Hughie mumbled, and when everyone gave small nods of agreement he rose up, going to retrieve the game from wherever the fuck they kept it.

Ben felt a tug on his arm, and looked down to find Her very pointedly not looking at him, attention focused on Frenchie, explaining Uno to Kimiko.

What.

Are we cheating.

He coughed, failing to cover his laugh as Annie gave him an odd look. No fucking honor, darling-

Shut up. I had a fun idea, but if you’re going to be a dick-

Ben tangled Her fingers between his, muttering Her name between their heads. If you want to cheat and win, I don’t give a fuck about it-

I want to win. She glanced up at him. But I can win at multiple things.

Ben frowned. What the fuck are you talking about.

No cheating, a smile played on her pretty lips, and Ben wanted to trace them with his hands and mouth and cock. She was so fucking beautiful, it was an issue to his attention as she continued. Because we’re competing against each other.

Why the damn hell would we do that.

Because whoever wins gets to be in charge of sex tonight.

Christ, he fucking loved Her. You sure you want that, Sunshine? Ben leaned down, bumping his nose with Hers, smirking as her heart jumped slightly. Because I’ll fucking kick your ass, my love. And you won’t get off easy, he nipped at her lower lip, and her mouth fell open. When I win.

If you win.

He chuckled. Brat.

Cunt. You in, or are you too much of a fucking pussy-

Ben tangled his hand in Her hair, pulling her up into a deep kiss. I’m in. Get ready to fucking lose.

Take your own advice, Pretty Boy. She pulled back with a wide smile, and Ben had never seen anything better. I’m going to make you regret being born.

That wasn’t fucking possible. Ben didn’t think he’d ever regret a thing again, when whatever he’d done before had gotten him here. Feeling all Her love for him in every corner of the world, with her perfect, sharp, bright eyes on his and her body fitting like a missing half against his.

She was real fucking serious about winning—she’d stood up, moving to sit beside Ryan across the table so Ben couldn’t see her cards—and it was going to make it so much more satisfying when Ben emerged victorious. He was already lining out what he wanted to do—maybe some edging, make her moan and beg and squirm under him as he teased her—but he was adaptable. If they got home and he realized she was already fucking dripping through her underwear, he’d probably just fuck Her. But he had to win first.

They’d had to combine two Uno decks—nine people was apparently too much for one fucking pussy deck to handle—and it took Ben about fifteen seconds after Frenchie dealt to realize that he couldn’t fucking remember how to play Uno. And when he looked up at the casual, sharp amusement on Her face, he realized She’d fucking expected that.

You cheated.

We’re not cheating, Benjamin. We agreed on that-

I didn’t fucking say we, I said you.

I don’t know what you’re implying. She glanced up from her cards with almost fucking sparkling eyes, and Ben felt like someone had dropped a building on him. Actually, he’d had a building dropped on him. This was a whole lot fucking better, because it was made of all her love and adoration and perfect, clever brain and smart fucking mouth. Are you getting worried, Pretty Boy? Want to call it off?

Never in a million goddamn years. Want to hear how I’m going to fuck you when I win?

She hummed, looking back to her cards. I think that’s foul play.

This whole thing is foul fucking play. Distracting Her with dirty talk was also the only fucking chance Ben had to win, but she didn’t need to know that. I’m going to finger you first, darling. See if we can get three fingers at the start this time, if I make you wet enough. Her heartbeat picked up, her eyes becoming slightly glazed, and Ben pushed on. You might already be fucking wet enough, you’re always so fucking wet for me, but I’d like to get you so wet you fucking squirt all over me. Make you fucking scream-

Ben. She shot him a half-hearted glare. Shut it. Stop cheating.

You started it.

She wrinkled Her perfect nose at him. Fuck you.

I will. With three fingers, then my tongue, then my cock, until you’re a beautiful, wrecked mess-

A crumpled up napkin hit him in the face, and when Ben glowered at Her, she just shrugged. I told you to shut it.

Ben didn’t shut it. By the time the game was halfway done, he’d gotten hit in the face with five more napkins, a plastic spoon, and a cup that still had some fucking water in it. But he was still fucking losing. By a lot. Half the damn deck was in his hand, She was down to two cards, and there was no actual warning in Her glares or distress trading between their bodies, so Ben kept telling her every single filthy thought that crossed his mind.

And he still fucking lost. Kimiko—despite only learning the game twenty minutes ago—won first, but everyone groaned to keep going for second place. When Ryan won soon after that, it became about third. Ben was hardly able to hold his cards in his hands—everyone had a fucking vendetta against him, and he’d been hit with so many plus two cards it had to be some sort of targeted fucking play they’d all agreed on behind his back—and the game was between Her and MM.

She won, with an overdramatic slam of a green five on the pile, and a wide grin around the table. And when Her eyes met Ben’s, already blown out and thirsty, he felt his dick twitch in his pants.

“If you losers will excuse me,” She stood up, still holding Ben’s gaze. “I’ve had to shit for the last fifteen minutes.”

MM’s face twisted in disgust. “You could’ve just fucking left, you don’t need to tell us-“

“Sorry,” She shrugged, clearly not fucking meaning it. “If you wanted not to hear about my bowel movements, you shouldn’t have shot yourself in the foot by changing it to green.” 

As She turned away from the table, walking off to the dining hall bathrooms, her voice rang in Ben’s head. Give it five minutes, then follow me.

He gave it three. They were now going for fourth, nobody seemed to think he was a serious contender for the title, and Ryan eagerly volunteered to play for him, so with a grumbled thanks and half-run to the bathroom, Ben followed Her.

She was waiting for him, arms crossed as She leaned against the wall. “That was not five minutes-“

Ben locked the door behind him, and slammed his mouth onto Hers with a groan, swallowing every single moan and pulling her half off the ground as he touched Her fucking everywhere.

“Ben-“

“So fucking smart,” he muttered, dropping his head to her neck and sucking on that one spot that made her like putty in his hands. “You’re such a fucking brat, Sunshine-“

“And I won,” Her voice was breathless, but still smug. “So I’m in charge, Benjamin-“

He chuckled Her name against her skin, moving one hand under her shirt, palming at her breast. “We both know this ends with me fucking you, darling, so just damn say how you want it-“

She pushed him off—her hands heated enough to grab Ben’s attention, but not to burn him—and dropped to her knees, smirking up at him as she ran a hand up his thigh. “I’m in charge. And I want to suck your dick. Can I please-“

Ben had never moved fucking faster. Belt off, pants down, freeing his cock to press against Her pretty, parted, slightly swollen lips. Even if she hadn’t won that stupid bet, he’d never fucking turn Her down for this. Not when she was smiling up at him under her lashes, playing with his balls as she swirled her tongue over the head of him, teeth scraping as she squeezed him and he bucked forward slightly.

He growled Her name, fighting every single instinct in his body to just pick her up and fuck Her. Push himself into her perfect pussy, make her breathing as heavy and ragged as his was. Cover himself in the wetness he could see dripping onto the bathroom floor, her pants having been tossed off to the side so she could fucking finger herself. “If you don’t move-“

She leaned back, giving him a fake pout that made his cock jump in her hands. “No.”

“Christ, woman-“

She started to stroke him, gentle and almost fucking painful with how goddamn slow it was, and he groaned.

“I won, Ben. And I want you to fuck my face,” He hissed through his teeth as She licked the underside of his cock. “But if you’re going to be an ass-“

“You won,” he grunted, gripping the sink with one hand and tilting her head back with the other. “You fucking won, and I’ll fuck your face any goddamn day-“

She nodded, grinning. “When I tell you, pull out.”

“What-“

“Trust me.”

He nodded slowly, and when Her mouth fell open, Ben pushed himself down her throat, almost fucking moaning at how good she felt. Fucking sinful, Her tongue swirling around him, Her pretty eyes fluttering as he bumped the back of Her throat. He was pretty sure that he could find release just like this. Watching Her below him, her cheeks hollowed out and one of Her hands playing with herself as she held his gaze. She was fucking threat to Ben’s health, with how goddamn perfect she was. With a little drool escaping her lips as Ben’s cock rested between them, a hand steadying herself against his thigh, grinding onto the fucking floor-

That’s what got Ben to move. She was squirming against her own touch, and he could fucking smell how wet she was, hear her whimpers around his dick when his hips rutted slightly, and he wasn’t allowed to take care of Her until after this. So he tangled his hand in Her hair, tugging her almost fully of of him before slamming her back down, bucking his hips before repeating it over and over until She was moaning, pretty eyes rolling back in her head and her lips perfectly fucking puffed.

He was close. She’d started to suck on him when he hit the back of her throat, and lick the tip of his cock when he pulled back, and Ben could feel the coil in his gut growing tight and hot, and fuck She was so perfect and beautiful and he felt goddamn high-

He hissed Her name as her nose bumped his lower stomach, her high and desperate whine making him rut up into her. “Christ, you’re so fucking good. Gonna fucking paint your perfect fucking body in me, darling, fucking love you, look so fucking beautiful with your pretty fucking mouth stuffed with my cock-“

Her nails began to sink into Ben’s skin, Her hips rolling against her own touch. Ben had never been fucking jealous of someone actively sucking him off, but god fucking dammit it should be him touching Her. She should be squirming under Ben’s touch, not having to fucking drip all over the bathroom floor. Everything was fading into a daze of Her, bright and soft and so fucking full of love it made Ben a little insane, and he was so fucking close to cumming right in her fucking vice of a mouth-

Out. Her voice was breathless in Ben’s head, and his hand loosened on her head before he’d even fully registered the words.

“What-“

She surged upwards, grabbing Ben’s face and pulling it down to hers, and he let every fucking instinct of Her, Her, Her take over. Spinning them around, slamming her into the wall as one hand dropped down, pinching and flick at her clit until she became putty in his arms, running one finger between the lips of her pussy, teasing at her opening but never pushing in-

“Ben-“ She gasped as he dropped his mouth to her neck, biting that one spot as he pressed his thumb around her clit, rubbing slow circles everywhere around it. “Fuck-“

“So fucking good, Sunshine-“

Ben’s words were cut off with a strangled groan as her hand wrapped back around his cock, pumping him so fast he was pretty goddamn sure it might make him pass out.

“Inside,” She whispered, lips brushing against Ben’s ear as his arms tightened around her. “Want you to cum inside-“

Ben dropped one hand to Her thighs, pushing them open without a further fucking question and ramming himself into her with a half shout of pleasure. He felt himself bottom out, rolling his hips just enough to angle himself against that deep part of her that always made her scream, and when She came—her moans and shouts of his name in his ear, her pussy contracting around him, and her hands scratching at his back—Ben cracked the wall as he slammed up into Her, relief crashing through him.

“So fucking tight, darling.” He growled against her skin, and she whimpered. “Good girl, taking me so fucking well. Fucking love you-“

Someone slammed their fist against the door, and they both froze.

“We can all hear you horny cunts humpin like bloody rabbits! Keep it in your fuckin pants!” Butcher shouted through the walls, hitting the door one last time.

“Either we cheat or we fuck,” Ben drawled back, letting Her bury her beautiful, flushed face in his chest. “So let us cheat, or buy some goddamn earplugs.”

“You could just not fuck,” MM yelled, sounding a little further away. “Not fucking is an option-“

Ben rolled his eyes, and turned his attention back where it belonged. With Her.

“If we run,” he muttered, forcing himself to pull out of Her and ignore the way he was already half-hard again from the sight of his cum, dribbling down her thighs. “We can get you back to the apartment, and keep fucking without any goddamn interruptions.”

“I, um,” She leaned against him as they dressed, and Ben realized there was a slight wobble to her knees. He’d fucking done that. “I don’t want to run-“

He scooped her up into his arms with a smirk and a kiss to her brow. “Hold on.”

“Wait,” She looped her arms over his neck, playing with his hair as she studied his face. “I’m still in charge. When we get home.”

Ben snorted, hauling her further up his chest to mutter against Her lips. “Tonight you’re in charge, Sunshine. But next time, I’m fucking winning, and you’re going to cum so many times you can’t walk for a goddamn week.”

She swallowed, mouth parting, and Ben pushed his tongue between her lips, sucking on the lower one in a silent promise.

“And if I win again-“

“You won’t.” Ben pulled back, giving her a wink. “Because we’re going to do a team game, and I’m going to take Ryan. And you’ll lose for him on fucking purpose.”

She scowled. “Cunt.”

“Brat.” Ben grinned at Her, and her pretty lips—still fucking swollen from his cock—pulled into a smile as pure, raw fucking joy painted Her feature. “Let’s get you home.”

End Note: I feel like the Boys would have the most foul Jackbox night. Things would be said that should've never been said in the first place, and will never be said again. She and Ben would make a voting block. MM would quit when his smart joke lost to Frenchie writing "massive balls" for the seventh time in quiplash. Someone would break the TV.

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@manicjk @lordofthunderthr @artemys-ackles @brtodd

[useless-catalanfacts]

One thing that really shocked me when I visited Madrid is that some people seemed genuinely offended when I said I only spoke Catalan. I'm from Germany and my boyfriend is Catalan. As he has a very strong Catalan identity and is very much an activist for the language it made sense for me to learn Catalan instead of Spanish. I don't speak it very well yet, but enough to make casual conversation. Trying to have a conversation with an acquaintance when visiting Madrid, I threw in some of my basic Catalan when English didn't fully work (not to piss her off, because I had no idea it would, but simply to make myself understood as English was failing us and I figured the Catalan might be easier and closer and sometimes even the same words as Spanish). This led to a lot of questions from the friendgroup, but this one person seemed personally hurt that I had chosen to learn Catalan and NOT Spanish. She argued that all Catalans spoke Spanish anyway and that my mindset was childish and "excluding the rest of Spain just to make a point". I thought this was such a strange way to look at it. I know this person is not representative for all of Spain, but I thought it was really worrying that some people think like that. She seemed convinced that there was no purpose of learning Catalan beyond "making a silly, political point" as if there wasn't an entire culture and history that came with it. As if Catalans speaking Catalan were like... being difficult on purpose and not.. you know... practicing their f*cking culture and living their damn lives. Good thing I actually am childish, and spoke exclusively in Catalan to her for the rest of the evening.

That's exactly how many Spanish people see it, it's a shame but your story doesn't surprise me. When I was a teenager I went for a few days to do a thing with other teenagers in Madrid and they reacted in a mix of disgust and offence when they heard me speak to my parents in Catalan on the phone. And I've heard quite a lot of other people explain very similar situations. It also reminds me of a video I shared a while ago (post here) where Judit Mascó explains that when she's working in Madrid and she answers the phone to her mother or friends calling, her co-workers told her it bothers them that she speaks in Catalan to other people, when she's not even talking to them.

Many Spanish people just can't understand that Catalan people would like to continue speaking our language, period. They are so convinced that Spanish is superior, that they believe that for our own good we should want to abandon our language and assimilate to theirs, and if we don't, well, then the only possible reason is that we're doing it for the sole purpose of excluding them, as if they were the centre of our lives.

They can see how they use their own language (Spanish) for their family, friends and the rest of their lives, but they can't give us the same amount of humanity and respect to imagine that we can want to speak our own language for the same purposes as they want to speak theirs. No, according to them, we must do it for bad faith proposes.

And let me say: you are doing very well in learning Catalan for your boyfriend. If your boyfriend speaks Catalan, I assume it's most likely that his family and friends speak in Catalan too, it's normal that you'd want to learn the language they use. This will bring you closer to his heart, because you can understand the words with which he has grown up and that are around him, it strengthens your bond. And it gives you the opportunity to communicate with other people around him and participate in conversation. Why would you not want to learn the language? Why would you, instead, want to learn a different language, and does that Spanish person expect you police what your boyfriend and his family/friends speak so not to exclude you (when you would have been the one to decide not to integrate)? It's just such a self-centered way of thinking from them.

[crooked-wasteland]

You most likely have multiple WIPs which I understand, but do you think you might write a piece about the latest episode Full Moon? It seems to substantiate your pinned essay quite a bit. I’d love to see your breakdown of that utterly bizarre excuse for a duet, and the decision to make Blitzø excited for the encounter for the first time in the series. Probably to hush people pointing out stolas is forceful and creepy.

The part of Full Moon the fully encapsulates my feelings of the episode is Stolas' disgusting reflection singing how he "will set [them] free". As in, free from the sexual contract that he made. Alone. With no one else's input.

He places himself on a pedestal for "taking responsibility" but he still refuses any accountability and it is why this last episode also failed. Stolas admitting how much he hates his wife, hates the life chosen for him, and how he wanted to rebel against Hell's expectations because breaking the rules was the real thrill. Even have him question his infatuation with Blitz and admit he knows nothing about this supposed "childhood friend" would have genuinely fixed every issue and left Medrano free to have her soap opera season 3.

After all, if Stolas lying about a malicious intent to potentially harm Hell only got him a time out for 100 years, him being honest with how petty and selfish his intentions were would have still set him up as the "Mastermind" and still resulted in the same outcome.

The chandelier being an environmental theme for Stolitz was baby's first symbolism and completely misunderstands how that technique works. Medrano thought it was deep. It's a chandelier that came with the house. It has absolutely no relevance to Stolas and Blitz as people aside from that aesthetically lacking scene attempting to invoke Bridge to Terabithia levels of whimsy.

Blitz being told to come to Stolas and singing about how "excited" he is that they are going to have sex when Stolas apparently told Blitz he didn't have to come the last several moons is cognitive dissonance. He could have also gone all those months if it was really what he wanted. Personally, I see it as Blitz just looking for a return to normalcy, only for Loona to make him anxiously attached.

Loona's pretty terrible for the part she played in this, just my personal opinion.

[appleblueberry-pie]

There aren't many Yandere Nanami requests, so I came up with one. How would you react if the reader was a second year student at Jujutsu school, was a beautiful and intelligent woman, and had one of the most powerful rituals in her clan? Maybe she would have tried to get closer, but she didn't count on the fact that she turned out to be Gojo Satoru's girlfriend (this would be set in her teenage years to be precise).

Kento was a little nervous. No, he was extremely nervous and even anxious. He couldn't eat this morning or even eat lunch. He knew he was going to confess to you today. Kento has a hard time with hiding things from people he admires and are close with. So, it's about time to tell you about how he truly feels, knowing it's been clawing at him to finally tell you the truth behind his actions.

The only reason he was regretting this moment and how it can end is because you never seemed fully receptive in his gift giving. He always got you your favorite juice boxes from the vending machines and even bought you lunch a handful of times when you didn't have one. But you always seemed.....he doesn't want to assume, but it kind of feels half-assed when you say you genuinely are grateful for his gifts and his efforts to get to know you better.

But nonetheless, he will tell you today how he truly feels. Right now. As he sits next to you and fiddles with his fingers as you wait for him to spit it out.

"Yes.....um....Y/n, I have to tell you something very important that I feel you deserve to know." You nod and scoot closer, thinking something bad happened, especially with how his voice was shaking and he was almost sweating. "I-...........I have had a romantic interest in you for quite some time now."

He watched your face drop as if you had seen a ghost. You seemed to almost lean away from him when you sat up straighter at his words. His heart dropped at your reaction and his stomach began twisting and turning when your lips pursed together.

He was gonna puke. He can't say anything else knowing you definitely didn't feel the same way. That reaction told him everything he needs to know. He can't even look at you anymore and this silence was giving him a heart attack. God, just say something so he doesn't do something stupid. "Nanami...." You just said his last name instead of his first. What has he done?

"You know I'm dating Satoru, right?"

Would he be crazy for trying to act like he didn't know this? "I......."

You brought your hand to his shoulder, as if you were comforting a child, and suddenly, he felt like a disgusting little kid. He never deserved you. But knowing you will always be had the hands of his terrible classmate will continue to make his heart burn in rage. All he wanted was you, and he can't because he was too late. He can't even prove a point. Not when he was weaker than you. Not when he can't protect you and Gojo can. Not when he was a pathetic little boy holding onto a broken dream to finally have the girl that was meant for him.

'Don't be sorry for me. Don't look at me like that, and please don't tell me that disgusting truth all over again. I see it every day.' He wishes he could say that out loud, but the last thing he wants to do is break your beautiful heart. He wants to hug you, but it would never feel the same as it used to, and all he wants now is for things to be how they used to.

All this does is piss him off even more. He will find a way to have you. If he has to meet your family himself, find a way to kill Gojo Satoru, steal him from you, find a way to meet your strength to show you what devotion means, find a way into your mind to make you see the truth and what will always remain true between him and you, then he'll take his sweet time to get to where he needs to be to make that happen. He will always be yours and you won't know it until he can show you. Until then, he'll take this slap to the face.

i feel so fucking bad for him in this oh my god

[xmycxx]

hello! how are you?

i wanted to say i love your tattoo!artist ellie and how you write. i don't know if anyone has already sent you this ask, but could you do a headcanon about jealous ellie?

💗💗💗

oh fuCK YES!!!

alright so in tattoo!ellie universe, i genuinely and very strongly believe that she would tattoo her initials or some matching tattoos with you so everyone can see you're hers

i feel like she wouldnt get jealous too easily, ik loads of writers say that but i stronlgy believe that while yea she would get jealous she wouldn't act on it

let's say she takes you to a bar and it's been like one hell of a long week, you're sitting there with your friends on a saturday night

ofc there's no spare seat so she offered you her lap

you get up to get her another drink, in my mind she drinks an old fashioned on the rocks, prolly jack daniels

so you go to get her another one, this guy comes upto you asking you who "the man who ordered that nice drink is."

you just laughed and tried to get away bc yknow, creepy man at a bar, but he just sorta kept going

at this point, i don't think ellie would be jealous, concerned? yes, jealous? no, you look like you stuck your hands in mud, you're disgusted

after a minute or two, she'd slide over and put her hand around your waist, taking the glass from your hand and taking a sip while making direct eye contact with the guy

"Oh this is my girlfriend, I was trying to take her drink."

your rexplanation was fully lost on this man as he scurried away from her death glare

if we're talking jealous jealus and not just protective? Buckle tf up

it'll be like if you're spending too much time with someone who isn't her

like everytime she asks you to hangout? "sorry babe, she just asked me to come out for drinks" or "I'm so sorry els, she said she needed help with something"

she'd get pissed

not because she's insecure, well, partially, but because she's so fuckin needy for you

you'd be getting ready to meet her for something, getting all dolled up, wearing her favorite outfit on you for someone else, girly would fully break

all up on you, kissing your neck, hands circling around your waist, distracting the fuck out of you so you can't even formulate a thought about leaving her

"babe i'm... fuck... I'm running late."

"Leave then."

let's just say you had a Nice Long Talk (AKA she fucked your brains out with her tattooed arm so you never even have a thought that isn't about her for the next week)

[avinwrites]

When they sing to you ♫ 

A headcanon/short fic mix of Demi, Melly, Norton, and Naib when you ask your significant other to comfort you with a song.

Demi

-Demi likes to hum when she’s working hard

-whether she’s mixing drinks or decoding

-it’s not unusual to hear a tune come from the depths of her throat

-but you’ve never heard her sing

-of course, sometimes, if she’s drunk, she’ll belt out whatever song she may have stuck in her head, but that’s different

-the day you actually did hear her sing for the first time, you almost missed it

You had returned from a rough match. It did more than just roughen up your body, your mental psyche was near destroyed. No one escaped, there were still three ciphers left, and you had already been downed two times previous to your state. It didn’t help that the Hunter finally got you by terror-shocking you. To put it lightly, you were beat.

You sought comfort, and your heart pulled you towards her. Demi was your epitome of contentment. Anything you need, she’ll be there. And while you tried not to ask for too much, in this case, you need her, no way around it. When you finally found Demi, conversing with a few others, you silently pulled her away and to your place of comfort. 

“You look rough.” She comments, understanding that all you need at the moment is her, and accepts this fact. without saying anything, you have her lay on your bed, your face finding the perfect space nestled in her chest, her arms around you, stroking your hair softly. In this position, you aren’t far from sleep, but an ethereal voice floating in the air keeps you from fully slipping into the realm of dreams.

It was Demi’s voice, singing a lullaby you don’t recognize, but you find solace in the words and the melody. You can’t stop yourself from drifting off, finding yourself in the same indulgence in your dreams.

Melly

-she’s not very vocal

-you like to ask her to tell you about bugs

-because even if you’re disgusted by them

-she’ll make even the most hideous creature sound like a genuine grace from the heavens with her words

-she’ll even tell you stories if you’d like

-but she gets very uncomfortable with the idea of singing

-and you’re ok with that, you’d never force her to do something she’s uncomfortable with

-but one day, as a gift to you, she surprises you

“I’d like you to meet me in my room tonight after dinner.” She says to you out of the blue. This was earlier in the afternoon. Now, it’s dark, and everyone has gone to their respective places of rest. Melly had practically locked herself in her room when she said that to you. By this point, you were worried sick. So, as soon as possible, you made your way to her room.

You open the door to find her sitting on the floor of her room, mask sitting neatly next to her, face reddened.

“You’ve expressed your desire to hear my voice before…” she starts, unable to make eye contact with you. 

“Oh, Melly, it really is ok, I don’t mean to push! I-” before you can argue further, she stops you.

“This is something I want to do for you. I recently learned a song I wish to share.”

So, you mimic her sitting position in front of her. She clears her throat and shakily serenades you, though gains confidence the longer she goes on. You’re awestruck; as if you’ve never heard a melodious note in your life, her voice changes you. You have to admit, of course she doesn’t have the voice of a professional singer, but it’s her. Not only are the words coming from her entrusted to you, you’re the only person to hear this, and it’s beautiful. When she finishes, face vibrantly embarrassed, she looks to you for your reaction. 

Your mouth opens and closes a few times, unable to form proper sentences. So, you do the only thing you can think of to properly express your feelings. Leaning forward, you gently press your lips to hers in gratitude, thankfully for you, she accepts, leaning in as well.

“Thank you, it was perfect.”

Norton

-Norton has never sung a day in his life

-maybe, possibly, in the mines with what used to be his friends

-but he usually left the tunes to them

-just silently listening

-now, he couldn’t even imagine warbling out a tune

-both from his unfamiliarity with the action and the memories it would bring

-he’s also never considered himself a protective person

-until he met you

-your kindness motivates him more than money could

-he values you so much

-so, for you, he’d try anything

This certainly isn’t the first time you and Norton have laid together in an attempt to sleep, but it is still new to you both. It took quite a while to get here, him holding you loosely, and you, careful not to constrict him. 

“You can’t sleep, can you?” He asks, after feeling you shift for the umpteenth time.

“Sorry, I’ll try to be still.”

“No, it’s ok, that’s not what I meant.”

Tentatively, he pulled you closer, resting his chin on the top of your head, and just as carefully, you adjusted your soft grip on him.

“This is nice.” You whisper, closing your eyes and trying, still, to fall asleep.

“Listen, I’m going to try something, just… stop me if it gets unbearable.” You’re awfully worried about what he’s going to do before you’re met with a deep, rumbling voice singing lyrics, something similar to what he would’ve heard in his mining days, and it's soothing coming from him. As he murmurs his tune, the deep rolling in his chest lulling you to sleep, he too seems to be falling deeper. Though you don’t dream, you feel a keen sense of warmth throughout the night.

Naib

-also not a singer

-he considers his singing voice “terrible”

-and that's the excuse he uses to get out of any situation where he’d have to sing

-but you, you wanna hear it

-you don’t care how bad it is

-but no matter how much you beg

-he gets that bashful blush on his face and refuses to comply with your request

-so, you let it go

He does feel kind of bad when you give up, sullen, but what is he supposed to do? He’s never sung before. Well, he can almost remember one time, drunkenly yelling some raunchy song while linking arms with his comrades, swaying about. When that memory fades from the forefront of his mind, he knows what to do for you. Despite his stoic outward demeanor, once you’re behind closed doors, he’s as affectionate as can be. You don’t blame him at all, and indulge him frequently in his request for physical closeness. This was one of those nights. After fondly remembering parts of his past and his family, he wanted to spend time with you, now considering you his family. As usual, you laid together, preparing for a long night’s rest, and he suddenly started to hum. His lips moved as he began to whisper comforting words in a language you couldn’t understand. 

“You remind me of my mother’s lullaby.” He finally says to you. “I had trouble remembering the words, but I’d like to entrust you with its melody.”

“I’d be honored.”

And the night continues. His voice becomes shaky, both from lack of use, and the emotions that come with the subject, but he sings for you in his mother tongue the same tune that would comfort him as a child. 

“Naib,” you start, sleep evident in your quiet voice.

“Yes?” He whispers, just as silent.

“Can you sing to me again?”

This time, he doesn't deny your request.

[pensbridge]

An Outline of the Reactions of the Bridgerton & Featherington Families walking in on Polin

ANTHONY *He is furious, but a toned down and "lighter" furious than that of what he held with Daphne. He's learned...somewhat, and significantly calmed down since marrying Kate, but "How could Colin do this and compromise Penelope Featherington?!?" [in fact he might go to Kate with these words]; eventually he acts as the older brother and after the harsh, hurtful words and unintentioned insults occur comes the sweet, heartfelt and sentimental moment where he gives advice/attempts to find a solution to any situations needing action.

BENEDICT *doesn't care/finds it amusing; proceeds with all the ammunition-> makes jokes to Colin & 100% roasts him on his cluelessness to, in fact..HELP her find a husband that is not him

ELOISE *ACTUALLY furious!; she is shocked as she never foresaw this coming; grossed out and in need of something to obscure her vision from the nightmare she just witnessed//she will question if Colin is clueless to Pen's secret, and (if she discovers them b4 her and Pen make up,) advise Colin to stay away from such a "snake;" however she will also at some point yell at him for going for her friend as her protective-mode chimes in

FRANCESCA *less severely grossed out; possibly saw it coming, because she's been extra observant the past few months; the worst person next to Benedict to be in possession of this knowledge for the fact that they are not subtle-she makes little comments and snarky remarks in front of Mama Bridgerton and the family that lets the cat out of the bag literally seconds after Colin even presents the prospect of a wedding to them

GREGORY *Shocked/surprised; he is tired of all these intelligent, beautiful women-as if they are not sunshine perfection-falling for his idiotic older brothers (makes that face like when Anthony proposed to Edwina)

HYACINTH *complete disgust, though not surprised... also a tattletale

PORTIA *I think she will be shocked/amazed that her daughter snagged a Bridgerton-and already thinking of the benefits (and plotting next moves), but also has a moment to think back on all the suspicious moments between them that she walked in on where it all just clicks!💡

PHILIPPA *shocked; later annoyed at any family gathering that she's not ½ of the only couple, and secretly jealous about how well they work

PRUDENCE *shocked and loud as hell; Portia will know immediately after she steps foot in whatever room, unless blackmail is involved

KATE *apologizes immediately; startled and unsure if she should excuse herself or take a page from Anthony to her new brother-in-law; her Anthony-like scolding turns to coy smiles and knowing looks in group settings that she walked in on the later engaged couple, that some others are completely unaware to

VIOLET *mortified (on both her end and Colin's) -> turns to reprimanding and lecturing

(+) for more fun >

SIMON *a cross between startlement and a chuckle; he lets out his laugh/smile before the door is even fully halted from opening

DAPHNE *she would be startled and surprised; would scold Colin for compromising Penelope and give him a reminder about judgment and if they were to be found out before marriage; also a heart to heart about love, because she would be the one he'd be able to open up to

non-family:

WILL *laughing all the way back to the boxing ring until he gives his genuine joy that Colin has found his own wife

MADAME DELACROIX *wide-eyed in shock, but then somehow a knowing look that all the while conveys a thought that says "of course"

LADY DANBURY *knew

[justafilmfan]

Nosferatu (2024) review {spoilers}

(sorry if there are typos I did not proof read)

Before I get into it let me just say I LOVED this movie. It was so beautifully done, the cinematography was fantastic, it was disgusting and sexy and dark. It was goth! (love a gothic movie) I could go on and on with all the things that I loved about this movie.

As a person who has sexual trauma I felt very seen through this movie and I think there are a lot of ways to view count Orlock. He could be symbolic to abuse, specifically childhood sexual abuse. The way Helen calls out to someone, anyone, for comfort as a child and that is taken advantage of and she falls into something much darker. There is a genuine connection between Helen and count Orlock, a genuine yearning that both intrigues and horrifies Helen. Often when people find themselves in a sexually abusive situation it's not uncommon for our brains to try to put a positive spin on it, a natural curiosity to what had happened to you and the confusing and conflicting emotions that can follow.

You could also view count Orlock as a representation of the taboo and "darker" wants. In the Victorian age era; women aren't allowed to be sexual creatures, they aren't supposed to have wants and needs that society dictates is unbecoming of women. We see this with Helen's diagnosis of hysteria and melancholy. Her desires present themselves in a raw and frightening way. She shows genuine yearning for Nosferatu that makes her feel disgusted and ashamed, because of the societal expectations placed on women, especially during this time period. At one point in the film Nosferatu refers to himself as an appetite, nothing more, which could further showcase Helen's wants and desires.

You could also view Orlock as a representation of Helen's mental illness. I like to image this when I look at Thomas Hutter's performance. Helen has for a long time been plagued with horrible dreams and terrible anxiety, which is worsened when Thomas is away. As Thomas is horrified and traumatized by Nosferatu and Helen talks of this vampire as terrifying and horrible but also gives her feelings of happiness and comfort. I think everyone who has lived with intense mental illness can attest that sometimes we find comfort in the familiarity of our symptoms. As Thomas goes through these experiences he never once lets himself lose love for Helen. Through all the trauma, he stills fights to make it back to his love and to save her from something that scares him to no end. I also imagine the ending being symbolic of Helen succumbing to her mental illness in attempts to protect her loved ones, thus ending her own life (only leaving heartbreak in her wake).

Basically I think there are many ways to look at the new Nosferatu movie but overall the movie is absolutely fantastic. I love how seriously they took this movie, it wasn't silly, it wasn't goofy, it was raw and horrifying and gross and sad.

I also need to give some love to the Nosferatu monster design. What an amazing design!! Of course, the mustache took me by surprise (as did it most people) but I did not hate it! I actually really love how they designed Orlock to look like a Romanian man of the time but made him taller, scarier, and more decrepit than just a regular man. They were able to make him supernatural and vaguely human and I wouldn't change a thing.

Lastly I need to give appreciation to the acting in this movie, every single actor gave a performance of a life time and made this movie so special. I have 0 complaints about all the acting performances, I felt so drawn into the movie, I was fully immersed in the story line and in the characters and their feelings.

In conclusion, if you like well thought out gothic vampire movies with amazing monster design, a well thought out plot, fantastic acting, and gross sexy monster loving then this is the movie for you.

5/5 stars

( I also need to add that the ending was *chefs kiss* incredible)

[jarofstyles]

Sugar, Sugar 9

Hello my loves! Here is Sugar Sugar part 9!

I hope you enjoy a bit of domestic bliss. Things are about to get interesting 🤭

Check out our Patreon for early access and exclusive writings!

WC- 3.5k

Warnings: mention witchcraft and rituals, Harry being so cute it’s disgusting

—-

Wrong.

Delilah’s glare was something to be fearful of and Harry knew that now. The blueberry muffins had barely made it budge. Thankfully, when he popped the iced caramel coffee on the counter and promised to pay for a ‘deep clean of the couch if you two are going to be canoodling on it’, she returned to normal.

Harry had visited the store a few more times and became a bit more acquainted with her as he waited for Y/N to give her readings. She was a genuinely cool woman, and Harry even learned a thing or two. She had insisted on seeing his palms, making him a bit nervous when she hummed, a long nail running over one of the indents in his hand. “You had a very serious ex before. Or… hm.” She mumbled. “Not a good ending. There’s lies in there. You should tell her about it.” Was all she said before dropping his palm and going to help a customer about to knock over a bowl of quartz.

He hadn’t, yet. Y/N was still getting to know him but they hadn’t exactly fully opened up about the extreme details of their relationships. Taking it slow… or something along those lines. Harry had told her he had been in 2 other serious relationships before but one hadn’t been what you’d typically expect. It’s why he was unsure when to bring it up. For now, he was happy finding out tidbits about her as they walked around the thrift store. Focused on her. The current. He had spent too much time in the past, and now he finally had a future that looked like something he wanted.

“This is perfect.” She mulled over the dresser. “For your room. It matches the headboard we found earlier.” Manicured fingers brushed over the stained wood, feeling the ridges. Furniture had energy, and she quite liked the one this was giving off. Warm. Home-y. It would fit the vibes that Harry and her had decided on.

“Whatever y’think, Sugar.” He was a bit distracted looking at her. Observing how she speculated over pieces, running her fingers over each and every one. Some would make her wrinkle her nose and shake her head, a few made her pull her hand away like she had been zapped. This one was to her liking, though. Her face looked it’s usual calm, soft content. Her nose unwrinkled and brow unfurrowed, tapping her nails against it as she placed a ‘hold’ tag on it that she had asked the front for. She’d called it, saying she knew she would find some gems in here.

“It’s your room, H.” Her laugh was soft. “You’ve got to give me some feedback sometimes. As much as I do like this ‘yes, honey’ attitude, it’s your space. Want you to like it just as much as me.” She removed her hand from the dresser, adjusting the tote bag strap on her shoulder. It kept falling off because of her knit cardigan. “Ugh.” The wrinkled brow returned on her face.

Wordlessly, he tucked his fingers under the strap and took the bag from her, placing it on his own shoulder. She had been irritated with it falling off all day and he didn’t mind holding on to it, the beaded stars and solar system needing a break from the pull and slide. “I know. But we made our pin board. You know what I like. And it is important that you like things too. You’ve got a good sense of style, for one, and also… I want you there a lot at some point.” Harry wanted her there or to be at her place a lot. She was already his best friend- mix that with his girlfriend.

He did worry a bit about being clingy. It wasn’t something he worried too much about in the past, however it wasn’t a feeling that he had experienced. Wanting to be around her. Wanting to touch. To bury his face in her neck and be the obnoxious couple in the theme park line. That had always made him cringe- but now he got it. He had a hard time not wanting to touch her, to follow her like a shadow. Y/N was magnetic.

Her face softened as she turned to him, placing her hands on his forearms. Squeezing them lightly, she gave a tender smile as it was obvious his words had affected her. “I will want to be there because you are. As long as you like the place, I’m happy. I just need a bit more input, okay? I can feel you staring into the side of my face, and as flattering as it is, it’s also going to melt it off.” And it unnerved her. Harry was so… attentive. He paid so much attention to her, with a slight intensity that made her feel a bit squirmy. He was also someone who seemed to be trying to match some of her energy which had made her feel a bit off kilter.

“Okay. That’s fine. I’m just trying to be good, sugar.” His fingers nudged her elbows to release her hands from his arms, grabbing one into his own to tangle their fingers together. “I do like that lamp over there. The tall gold lookin’ one. It’s kinda 60’s, don’t you think?” He could go back to his soft pining over her later. She had expressed a wand and Harry wanted to make her happy.

“I do.” She chirped back, happy to see him giving some sort of input back. “Want me to put a sticker on it?”

“Sure. Why not. And that cool marble statue thing. Dunno what I’d do with a giant hand but hey, it’s art right?”

…

“Baby-“

Y/N ignored the cinnamon like warmth swirling around her gut at the term of endearment, slapping her card down on the reader.

“No. You just spent hundreds on stuff and delivery. And you bought me a few frames.” Her stink eye made him snicker. “Let me take care of lunch. I’ll gladly let you spoil me sometimes, but I like some equality. I like to spoil, too. So let me.”

Harry wanted to argue that his girl shouldn’t have to pay for any sort of meal, any sort of anything- but she would find that out later. It was early in the relationship and she didn’t exactly know his financial situation yet, didn’t know some of the things he wasn’t necessarily hiding but not putting on blast. Plus, the self smug smirk that came when he merely waved his hand and opened her tote bag for her to place her wallet back in was adorable.

“Fine. But I’m getting dinner later.” It was lunch now and Y/N had needed a smoothie and something with substance before they went back to his place to prepare for some of the things to be delivered. “And I expect a proper cuddle later too. You’ve been stingy with them today.” The faux indignant sniff was met with a laugh from her, her hand being caught by his as they went to the pickup counter to wait for their drinks.

The shopping trip had been a major success. Y/N felt oddly domestic with him, understanding a bit of how people would say how much more fun things were just by having the presence of someone else. She usually did those things on her own, being joined by Delilah and some other friends sometimes but she was an independent person. As much as she hated to admit it, sometimes shopping with other people was a chore to her. She was impatient once she was done browsing, hated having to go back over sections and pretend to look too while they finished. It was a trait that had led her to believe perhaps she just wasn’t the right person to go on shopping trips with people, but with Harry? It had been different. He traveled at the same speed as her, walking behind and sometimes straying and coming back with items, but he matched her energy in a way that felt relieving.

The smoothies were grabbed, along with the bag containing their food before they walked out to Harry’s car. “I’m excited for the deliveries.” The pink drink in her hand was sipped on as she watched him beat her to the door, opening it for her. He had been highly upset when she hadn’t waited for him to open it last time, so she instead let herself revel in the giddy feeling it brought her. He was truly a gentleman in every sense of the word. A huge upgrade from her past relationships.

“Me too. They said 4, yeah?” He recalled as he took her bag and placed it into the backseat. Truth be told, he hadn’t been paying much attention to what the store manager had been saying when they checked out. He’d been distracted by Y/N and how the light in the store had been hitting her just right. It was almost embarrassing with how taken aback he was with her beauty each time.

“Mhm.” She hummed around her straw. “We have 2 hours to clean stuff up and make room for the delivery. Then we can start setting things up when you get them. It’ll probably take a while for your place to feel finished but at least it’s a start. Right?” Her eyes went to his face as he pulled away from the curb, his hand finding her knee as he began the track back home.

“Right, Sugar.”

——-

Y/N really did love his space. The home was lovely and airy, the exposed brick some of her favorite bits of the house. It had a bit of a mid century vibe to the fixtures, one of her personal favorite design choices that he had said came when he moved in here. It was just… very bare bones.

“It really is beautiful, Harry.” She placed her smoothie down on his kitchen island, arms wrapping around himself as she looked out into the living room. It was very obvious that a man lived here, a man who hadn’t found time to unpack much or decorate. Luckily, Y/N loved doing both things. The nearly blank slate excited her, and the prospect of spending this time with Harry? Even more so. “It’s going to be perfect once you get it fixed up.”

Harry honestly didn’t spend much time at home. Part of it was that, yes, it didn’t feel very much like a home yet. But the other was that he had moved here and thrown himself into renovations for the bakery. It took a lot of time and effort and he had wanted to be involved in every step of the process. Having his own bakery had been his dream come true.

“I can see what sold you on the place, though.” She teased as she went around the kitchen. Double oven, large fridge, a nice stove. It was spacious and had a large window over the sink. Over the island was a hanging rack for pots and pans. “It shouldn’t surprise me that this seems to be the most lived in area.” There were fresh flowers on the counter and dishes in the drying rack, photos stuck to the fridge with magnets. “Kitchens are the heart of the home, Baker Boy.” She sent him a look over her shoulder, sticking her tongue out at him playfully.

“Oh yeah?”

It really was doing something to him, seeing her in his space. Seeing her walk around his kitchen, her bare feet padding against the wood. Her hair had been pulled into a low ponytail somewhere in the middle of shopping because she had gotten a bit hot, a few tendrils still framing her face. His eyes tracked her everywhere trying to commit this to memory. His feet coaxed him towards her, reaching to her hips to pull her body into his own.

“Yep.” She popped the ‘p’ of the word, looking up at him with a nervous giggle. It still made her want to flinch a little bit when his hands grabbed at her softest places, so used to pushing hands away or feeling ashamed when people felt it- but all harry did was dig his fingers in a bit deeper and look at her with a slightly darker glint in his eyes. It was a desired look, one she felt to her core. “Why are y’looking at me like that?” She mumbled, placing her hands on his forearms. She hadn’t done anything to warrant a hazy look from the man.

“Just like seeing you in my space, is all. The kitchen, its my happy place.” He released one side of her hips to gently tug the scrunchie from her hair and let it fall down. “My mind goes a little crazy with imagining things.” The admission made her tummy swirl, mind race.. his fingers tangling at the bottom of her hair as his mouth fell on to hers for a sweet kiss that surprised her.

“What things?” She whispered back, feeling his lips still incredibly close to her. Curiosity killed the cat, sure. But she would have 8 more lives.

“Just… seein’ you in here after you spend the night. Bet you look so beautiful, sleepy and soft.” He started, exploring her eyes with his own. They were one of his favorite parts about her. “Thinking about teachin’ you how to bake a bit in here. You look really good in my spaces. Like you belong here.” He felt a bit shy saying it, but the smile that grew on the corner of her lips made it fade.

“I’d like all of that.” She replied. There was no reason to be talking so softly, so close to each others lips- but it seemed like when they got moments alone, they ended up being as close as possible to one another. Like their bodies were magnetized to drift as close as they could each time a door was closed and they could be private. “I am a shit baker though, H. I really hope you take the lead or I may burn down your kitchen.” Her joke made him laugh through his nose, a slight shake to his head.

“I will, but you’re probably selling yourself short, Sugar. No way someone so sweet could be that bad at baking.” His praise made her soften, eyes looking away from him as she finally pulled away and let her head fall against his chest.

It was insane, how quickly he was chipping away at her piled high walls. How he had sweet talked his way past the guards that were supposed to be protecting the barriers of her heart. Harry was stupidly charming and sweet, understanding and respectfulness that it wouldn’t feel real if it was anyone else. She had even tried to convince herself that perhaps something wasn’t right but her intuition outweighed her insecurities. He was being honest. His fingers stroked over her back in the embrace, lips pressing against the side of her head as he let her stay there. It was warm and comfortable in every sense of the word and neither wanted to break it.

“I am.” She reassured against the material of his shirt. “But…” Harry wanted to whine when she stood back from his chest, his hands keeping his grip on her as he tried to fight moving from their position. “I brought the stuff to cleanse the house… spiritually if that’s okay.” She still felt a little shy with witchy things around him

“Oh shit. Absolutely. Why? Is the energy bad?” He looked around to see if he could feel something but he didn’t have the abilities she did, he was pretty sure.

“No, no. You’re cute.” She laughed, patting his cheek. “It’s just something we do when we get new houses or move into new spaces, even just to refresh the environment. When the energy gets… mm, maybe a bit heavy or dark? After a really bad day, a death in the family, loss of friendship or job, or just to lift the mood. But for this its to get rid of any leftover stuff that may be there from the last owner and anything that isn’t the best possible energy. Like a restart.” She stepped from his grip and went for her bag, pulling out a wrapped bundle of herbs, incense and a bell.

“Can I ask what the bundle is?” He murmured, looking over her shoulder as she placed them on the counter. He knew what incense was and he could tell there was a bell but he wasn’t sure why.

“Of course you can.” She smiled to herself at his questions. He wasn’t just letting her do it to humor her- he was actually curious. “It’s a bundle with juniper and rosemary. I’ll burn it and walk around your house. We’ll open the doors and windows to let the old energy out and welcome the good in.” She explained. “It’s a smoke cleansing. After that we’re going to chime the bell in each room to invite positive energy inside and then you’re going to keep it somewhere safe so you can do it whenever you want.”

Harry listened intently, nodding along as he watched her pick up the herb bundle and her lighter. When she lit it, it smelled surprisingly good. His eyes trailed her as she opened up the kitchen window, letting the smoke waft in the air. Under her breath he could hear her mumbling something over and over again but didn’t interrupt. Instead he followed her around and opened the windows for her, watching her smile as she did this favor for him.

He had to admit that he did feel a difference in the air. As crazy as some people may think it was, and maybe he was just reading into it, the energy felt lighter in each room after she brought the smoke inside and let it reach each corner of the room. He noticed that in each room she went into. He caught some of what she was mumbling, something about only positive energy being allowed to remain, that anything not of love and light and something else needed to leave immediately and not return. He felt chills once he realized it, a little nervous but also excited. This was fucking cool.

Once all the rooms had been cleansed she returned with him to the kitchen and grabbed a ceramic bowl, letting it smolder out in it as it burned down. The steps repeated, the bell being rung in each room as he followed like a puppy, eager to understand even if he didn’t quite get how it worked.

“There we go.” She murmured. “Much better.”

“Was the energy bad before?” He asked even though he was a little nervous of the answer. It was a little odd, how she felt things. Harry wasn’t quite a believer but he wasn’t a complete skeptic either and Y/N believed in it, so he would do his best to get it.

“No. It was just… the way I’d describe it is cramped. Like you’re in a subway car at rush hour. It made sense that you probably didn’t spend much time here. It can be hard for people to adjust to new places and it adds up to me why it takes a while for places to feel like home. You’ve got so much residual energy from other people. Now it’s yours.” She turned to him, showing him the incense and its holder. “I was thinking this can go on your fireplace mantle. If you want to, i mean. It smells good and it can attract good energy, but if you’d rather not I understand.”

Y/N didn’t want to overtake his space and make him think he had to do anything here for her. It was all to help but she had felt excited that he hadn’t just brushed her off like everyone else had.

“Oh, sick. Sure.” He took it from her. A gift from her, a reminder of her when she wasn’t there. It was hard to hide how excited he was to have her bring it here for him but he failed when he nearly skipped over to the mantle and placed it down. “I’ve never lit incense before though. Does the flame just go out?”

“I blow it out and then it continues to burn. I’ll show you.”

Harry hoped one day he could have her here to do it whenever she wanted.

[horizon-verizon]

As a severely autistic woman, I genuinely believe they only made Helaena autistic and detached from reality so they could avoid having her interact in a meaningful manner with her brothers, her children and have an excuse for not giving her a personality, and deepening and exploring her character. B&C also loses its impact, from the way they portrayed her in that sequence to the aftermath. They only allow her to grieve for one episode and then quickly moved on it’s oh, well, children die every day. Some people may act like this to cope with loss, but how come we only see this from Helaena ? It’s like she completely forgot that Jaehaerys ever existed. They only made her a “dreamer” so that they don’t have to do anything with her character and wr

Which is disgusting because we aren’t emotionless shells that are incapable of having loving connections with people, and experiencing rage and grief and loss, as well as happiness and joy. Autistic people can lash out, get very emotional and attached. Not showing that isn’t giving a fully rounded character. HOTD used a lot of harmful stereotypes, “magical autist”, “pure innocent childlike”, “robotic/unexpressive autist.”

Funny how I mentioned something like this in many of my posts about how I disliked Helaena's characterization in the show HERE, HERE, HERE, HERE, HERE, & HERE. Thank you for listing out the specific stereotypes, and yeah I agree. i just can't like Helaena becoming a dreamer or how she's written in her neurodivergence the way that she has.

Even though one asker mentioned Patchface and Duncan the Drunken (these were for if the show really wanted Helaena's "dreams"-that-are-not-dragon-dreams to have any point or significance in their fanfiction) I still dislike Helaena becoming a non-dreamer. I'd still hate it for the overall story bc there was no point injecting an intense magical elements in the humans of this particular generation of Targs and it is still lead by this weird "Cassandra" thing on the writer's part. Helaena was made a "dreamer" not bc they were interested in exploring her part in ASoIaF's magic but to psychologically isolate her.

They only allow her to grieve for one episode and then quickly moved on it’s oh, well, children die every day. Some people may act like this to cope with loss, but how come we only see this from Helaena ? It’s like she completely forgot that Jaehaerys ever existed.

Yeah, we don't really see her mourn Jaehaerys in the what...few weeks or days after his death even without words. Have her fidget with an object he used to play with or visit his dragon or tear up now an again, plz!

But of course she was never meant to be a real person, just a "Cassandra" firgure.

[accirax]

initial thoughts on DCAS episode 7

very notable that this was within the context of being about "love" specifically. (at least) one-sided trevek canon? (i'm not even a huge trevek shipper i just think this whole plotline is funny)

okay, so Yul's foot injury IS real. or at least, he's using it as an excuse to complain. still, the fact that it was brought up again an episode later makes me think that it's going to have SOME relevance to the plot.

any time that Yul has to parrot something in Emily's "you go girlfriend ;D" manner of speaking i cackle. he didn't choose the home decor saying any time is wine time lifestyle, the home decor saying any time is wine time lifestyle chose him.

Grett i am... genuinely confused. how can you possibly think that Yul is actually in love with you? did you really receive THAT little love in your home life? you have no ability to distinguish catty and fake praise for your accomplishments from real ones because your family gave you THAT little recognition? man. now i made myself sad :( ily Grett

okay, confirming that 1) it was Tom's trap, 2) they are willing to eat squirrels, 3) Tom is serving as the provider for the Cyan tribe. all things to take into account for any upcoming Cyan eliminations.

why

and how does said boyfriend feel about you kissing another man on television, Tom? this is a stupid lie.

again, why? it's probably already apparent from my earlier comments, but i changed my mind; i'm fully with Jake in this argument now. sure, Jake is really insecure and overly emotional, but what the HELL is Tom doing? making up a boyfriend is a really shitty thing to do, whether Tom had a legit reason for not calling Jake these past two years or if he didn't contact Jake due to his own mixed feelings/indifference. in either case, he should have told Jake the truth. at least when Jake was acting immature in S1, he was 24. Tom is a nearly 30 year old man. ACT LIKE IT.

Fiore slay

this is a really interesting response due to how vague it is, including in the vocal performance. was he taken off guard by his boss being nice to him? does he believe that she's telling the truth? does he feel bad for Trevor, or will he come to believe that he IS way better than Trevor? i'm glad that they're continuing on with the concept of the hosts having a plotline, because imo that was one of the highlights of S2, but they aren't doing it in a way that eats up as much of the screentime as it did in S2.

if Will was out of the picture i would be shipping these two so hard. who am I kidding, i kind of still am anyways.

Ally's other gf is here :,) glad that they got to reconnect (and neither of them were eliminated for it)

Fiore slay

the confirmation that Aiden thinks that the idea of him having any attraction to Tom is laughable and disgusting is HILARIOUS to me. bro really said, "why the hell would i be into YOU when i have JAMES lmao" straight to Tom's face. tbf, James and Tom are like... opposites in terms of personality and appearance (beyond being generally handsome and athletic young men).

"silly me, i keep forgetting that not everyone met their super cool and attractive boyfriend on reality TV. my bad!" (/pos)

(i tried to type "hubby" instead of boyfriend but i spared you all. it was too cringe even as the one subjecting others to the cringe.)

okay this was very fitting for her. iconic.

honestly, Alec and Riya's villainous alliance/friendship is really fun. leave it to Alec to always find himself in the least likely but most entertaining duos. Riya really benefits from being paired with a legitimate strategist, and someone who won't just let her totally get away with stuff.

we had to get in one last Fiore taking unnecessary damage for the road :,(

feeling like Jaiden is going to be winning the starting couples' survival roulette. and Wishley, to the extent they count.

now i'm no physicist, but how did this work? shouldn't the ball be a fast and heavy enough object at this point that it would jump over the log, not ricochet off of it? i suppose if the ball is made of something more like wicker than yarn, it could be a bit more likely to do that. but then why is it going to the side? it hit the log straight on!

... are you not allowed to help him anymore? what?

ellie is going full villain mode fr. if her and gabby's relationship gets messed up, that would definitely be karma. but, i suppose she survives this episode...

this is funny because nobody strikes me as the pizza and soda loving type. Alec, Grett, Yul, and Riya all seem like people who would want to eat something that's both fancier and healthier.

communication W (for both of them)

Fiore is such a best girl that she's not even a salty juror. she's not mad at them for so long that she can't use her final moments to throw a wrench in the works for everyone else. the grind never sleeps, clowns <3

and she even conquered her greatest nemesis, the bus, this time. fly high, queen. i'll miss you.

well, as a Fiore stan, this episode was a bit sad for me. but, i do totally understand why Magenta would both vote for Fiore and lose the challenge. (damn you, Ellie...) Fiore already did super well in both S1 and the original Adventure Camp, so i understand why they wouldn't have her go super far again in this season, especially when everyone knows she's such a threat.

i just hope that we can still get a little more closure for her and Alec than we got already in this season. all it has to be is, like, him being sad at her elimination for reasons other than pure strategy and maybe a nice conversation at the finale. it doesn't have to be Alec finally adopting her... even if i did want that to happen... i'd just prefer to know that they leave things on good terms.

anyways, another really solid episode! i look forward to the next one. thanks for reading!

[helloimsoverybored]

A Pretty Long Rant on RPF shippers in the context of David Tennant and Michael Sheen

the entire georgia/anna discourse is so. bullshit. because those are actual, real people, with real lives and real relationships with those around them

Regarding dt and gt, just saying, no one has five children together as part of a pr stunt. Same with Michael and Anna.

And the fact that rpf people fail to realise this is concerning- taking the "my wife" jokes quite literally. News flash, it's a fucking joke. It's not something gt and al are making up to cover up for the fact that their respective partners fell in love with each other (yes, this is an actual take i've seen on this matter)

And idk if the rpf people are just dumb or are fully aware of what they're doing, despite the fact that they're completely tearing apart the lives of real people.

Another retort I've often seen is that fans have the right to criticize celebrities. Yes, yes they do. But breaking down a marriage spanning over a decade isn't criticism! You're creating fake problems out of thin air and for what? Genuinely, for what?

Rpf shippers just automatically assume the worst in both Georgia and Anna, and you know what? God forbid women do anything. Because that's exactly what this is.

They're completely vilifying gt and al because... they're in a relationship with their "blorbo actors?" They're acting like gt/dt and al/ms are fictional characters that you can play around with like dolls but you can't play around with real people's lives! Simply put, it isn't ethical.

I feel like the rpf people just fail to understand the meaning of “real”, because I don’t even know how one can feel so alright and happy by tearing apart the lives of real people. The fact that people are finding every possible way to find problems in their current relationships to suit their fantasies is so fucking disgusting.

Okay now if you're with me so far, I'm impressed. Stay with me because I'm not done yet.

Regarding Georgia, don't rpf blogs just love to criticize her and her parenting methods? That Georgia's just lazy and only wants to drink wine, but omfg. wtf. She has fucking 5 children. I don't care what you think, managing those many kids is NOT an easy task. But also... posts I've seen on this matter never seem to bring up David? Why? Isn't he a parent? Shouldn't he also have a role in parenting? Whatever Georgia does surely won't be against what David believes, right? Wake up, rpf shippers, wake the fuck up.

David almost definitely does have a role in the parenting (anyone willing to fight me on this, come off, I'll give you the reasons) but since he’s all over London at the moment, he probably doesn’t have much time. Which means that gt has to manage 4-5 kids all by herself. So she does actually deserve a break, more than anyone else. But she doesn’t because wahoo god forbid women do anything.

And putting all that aside, what the hell gives rpf people the right to hate on her as if they know her irl. Their default behavioral status is set to mean and bitchy and that’s just. concerning. rpf people need to understand the difference between real life and fiction istfg.

Okay, i swear I'm nearing the end of this rant, please don't go yet.

Sometimes fans do have the right to speak up against an UNHEALTHY relationship. There are multiple examples all over the place where one person has expressed dissatisfaction but no one took them seriously. Except… neither gt/dt nor ms/al have expressed dissatisfaction. At all. It’s actually the exact opposite where they keep fawning for each other. There’s 0 suggestions of any of them being unhappy in their respective relationships apparent from yall overanalyzing their body language to the point where it becomes false.

Do Georgia and Anna ship themselves with each other and ship David with Michael? Yes. But that's a fucking joke. Learn to take a joke, yalls, it will get you a long way. And even if they are the ones doing the shipping, so what? That doesn’t give you the right to. It’s their lives. You’re just a person viewing their lives from a small peep hole known as Instagram.