#like are they just kind of background decor or does he enjoy the whole process of watering them and repotting etc

[uhbasicallyjustmilex]

💚

[strawberryspence]

A Dinner and A Future

Fluff | Spencer Reid x Reader

Summary: Spencer just wants your first date to be perfect and surprisingly, it goes really well.

Word Count: 3,7k.

Warnings: some cursing, first date nerves, but that's it. just pure mindless fluff.

Writer’s Note: Hello! I've been going through a writing dry spell and the thing that solved it was writing this. I've been seeing a lot of edits on tiktok about Spencer's traumas and I just wanted to give him something simple and happy. I was also listening to Kodaline on repeat while reading this, so yeah it's going be hella sappy. Enjoy! <3

Gif is mine. Lesley Smith-Juniment, you have my heart.

Spencer is nervous.

Wait no, scratch that, nervous is not good enough. He was brimming to the edge with worry and queasiness. What other synonyms does nervous have? Spencer was antsy, anxious, perturbed, uneasy, at this point he can recite the whole thesaurus.

Spencer closes his eyes and takes a deep breathe. He can do this. He has waited for this for a long time and he won’t waste it because of burnt pasta.

Okay, he looks back at the note that David Rossi himself wrote in his own special handwriting.

1. Cook 1 pound pasta until Al Dente. Boy Genius, Al Dente should be firm when bitten. You cook it on a boiling water with salt and oil. SALT AND OIL.

2. While that’s cooking, do nothing. LITERALLY DO NOTHING. Watch it. Do the sauce later. In some miraculous way, if you don’t watch the pasta you’ll burn it.

A grin spreads across Spencer’s face as he puts down the paper and reaches for the fettuccine pasta and dropping it on the boiling water (which he measured with measuring cups he borrowed from JJ)

“Okay, now I wait for it to boil.” Spencer stares at the pasta as it cooks. Did he buy enough parmesan cheese? or enough pecorino cheese? Oh no. He looks over the other side of his counter where all the (complete) ingredients sit and he sighs in relief as if he hasn’t checked it 15 times since he started.

The pasta was still cooking and isn’t going to be firm anytime soon. Spencer ponders if he should just cook the sauce while waiting but he knows he’s going to mess it up if he doesn’t give it his undivided attention.

He looks at the watch on his wrist as it ticks to 5:21. He has one hour, thirty nine minutes and forty six seconds. He still has time before the date. The date with you.

It took him nine months, Derek and Emily annoying him to death to just ask the pretty librarian out, one extensive background research from Penelope, two separate talks of the “You deserve to be happy” advice from JJ and Hotch and one lecture about marriage from Rossi to finally ask you out.

He’s kinda annoyed really because he spent so much time thinking about you and thinking of the perfect way to ask you out but he shows up at the library you work at one day with a cup of coffee in hand and his heart on the other.

You didn’t even hesitate. There was no pause to process what he asked, there was no questions following the embarrassing stumbling of the words, “W-will you go have d-dinner with me? L-like a date... Date?” You immediately said yes with a small hop and the biggest smile on your face.

This date has to be perfect. He asked you to come to his apartment at 7. Spencer would’ve picked you up but he was making you a home made dinner and the date was taking place on the rooftop of you apartment, which Penelope and Derek helped him decorate with lights.

He tries the pasta and when its finally firm to the bite, he takes this as his queue to read the paper again. Of course, he can remember all of the instructions but Rossi still wrote it down and reading it calms his nerves.

3. If its cooked, drain your pasta water but leave a little pasta water on the side. Then you can continue.

4. In a pan on MEDIUM heat (just around 2-3 on the stove setting) cook one pound diced pancetta and 1 cup chopped onions in olive. Put this down and chop chop!

Spencer puts the paper down as he follows the instructions to drain the pasta. After he was done with it he puts the pan on the stove and starts chopping up the ingredients he needs.

Cooking is strangely calming. He never thought he’d find it calming. He always found himself burning stuff. So he sticks to the microwaveable meals and fast foods, even if he knows the statistics about these kinds of food.

After finishing the chopping he reaches over the paper and reads it again.

5. Are you done? Okay. Put the chopped stuff on the pan with olive oil and cook it until the pancetta is browned and onions are soft.

He immediately follows the instructions written. The onion and pancetta create a silent hiss as it hits the pan. As it cook he looks down again.

6. That’s going to take a while, so leave it but stay by its side. I am giving you permission to do two things at once. Dr. Reid, please be mindful of it.

Spencer rolls his eyes before proceeding to #7.

7. Combine the two cheeses. Then divide it in half. Then pour the half into 4 egg YOLKS. Just yolks! The yellow ones! Then beat it lightly until its really combined.

He has already separated the egg yolks from the whites (a job he didn’t think would be that hard but was surprisingly very hard) before he started cooking. He adds the combination of cheeses to the eggs and lightly beats it as he watches the pan of onions and pancetta sizzle.

When done with the egg and cheese combo, he gives the pan a stir before looking back down.

8. Is the egg done? Yes? Good. Is the pancetta and onion good? Yes? Good.

9. Okay, now you put your pasta in the pancetta pan.

10. REMOVE IT FROM THE HEAT! REMOVE IT!

Spencer follows the instructions to the T. He puts the pasta on the pancetta, gives it a stir and immediately removes it from the heat. He sighs in relief. He hasn’t burned anything yet.

11. You haven’t burned anything yet? I am proud of you.

12. Now, pour the egg mixture into the pan and toss the pasta until coated. TOSS IT GENTLY. If you’re scared use tongs.

13. Pour about 1/4 cup of the pasta water I told you to set aside earlier. You don’t have to pour all 1/4 cup, just until you get the creaminess you want.

Spencer reaches over the nearest tongs. He’s not going to toss anything tonight that involves pastas or pans. He’s taking the safe road because he wants everything to be perfect.

14. Add the rest of your cheese! Toss some more and then add salt and pepper as NEEDED!

15. You can serve it with parsley.

16. Now, go take a shower and change into some cleaner clothes.

17. Just be you and have fun, Spencer. Goodluck! :)

Spencer smiles as he puts the paper down and makes the finals touches to the pasta. He starts doing what was instructed and it surprisingly, ends up in the perfect texture. Just like the one he tasted when Rossi had a pasta night.

He was proud of himself as he takes it off the stove and makes sure that all the stoves are turned off. There was this report he read in 2018, that cooking and leaving the stove open was the leading cause of home fires.

He takes the food, puts it into a fancy tupperware (another thing he borrowed from JJ) and puts it in the microwave. He cleans up a little and stuffs the pans and pots to the dishwasher, because you are coming in his apartment even for a second.

He starts getting himself ready for the date with a shower. As the warm water glides through his body he thinks of how funny life could be.

Spencer first meets you in the library. He has not slept well in weeks so instead he opts to go to the library to get some reading done. But as soon as he sits in one of the (surprisingly) comfortable leather chairs, its as if sleep knocks him out. It wasn’t until the closing time that you wake him up and he thinks that you were an angel sent for him. This elicits a giggle from you.

“I am sorry, I am not an angel. I am just the librarian and we’ve been close for over an hour now. I just didn’t want to wake you up. You looked like you really needed that sleep.” Spencer immediately jumps to his feet as he apologizes profusely to the kind librarian, “Oh, it’s okay! Don’t say sorry. I was also reading so I didn’t mind the peace and quiet.”

That’s how Spencer meets you. He comes back a few days later after a case with coffee, croissant and an apology. You immediately become friends and thats how all of this started. Spencer finds himself falling in love with the kind, gorgeous, clever librarian faster than he expected.

Every week after that, Spencer comes to the library with pastries and coffees for his favourite librarian and every week, you welcome Spencer with a warm smile and a new book for him to read. He can read it in one sitting but he reads it in the slowest pace he could so it can last for a week.

Spencer comes out the shower and stares at his closet. Should he go casual or formal? Casual or formal? Its just dinner, he’s chill and casual is the way. He picks one of the few plaid shirts that he has and puts it on with a white shirt underneath. He tries to brush his hair, it sits for a moment before it starts curling again. He cringes but leaves it be.

Spencer proceeds to the kitchen to start packing the food into a wicker basket (that he also borrowed from JJ, he basically borrowed her whole kitchen). He packs the utensils in a table napkin that comes with the basket. The main course for the date was the carbonara, and the dessert was a tiramisu Penelope made.

He reaches over his sofa where the bouquet of paper flowers are. He made it a few nights ago with Penelope’s help. He stayed up to make more of it with old books he found in the BAU.

Because what kind of flowers is the best flowers for librarians? Origami flowers made with old book pages.

He shouldn’t be nervous. You’ve been friends for all the months that he didn’t have enough courage to ask you out. You’ve taken trips to old bookstores together for book hunting. This shouldn’t be different from your other trips.

The pitter patter of rain against his window takes him out of his thoughts.

“Shit! Is it raining!?” Spencer yelps, before opening the closed curtains. Beads of water runs down his windows and if its any other day he would love it. But not tonight, when he planned a rooftop date. He cringes as he thinks of the fairy lights hanged up and the table set up that is probably soaked now.

“Don’t panic. Don’t panic. Think, Spencer, think.” Spencer thinks fast. He finds the extra table cloth that JJ gave him because “Just in case.” He reminds himself to buy her a bottle of wine as a thank you. He places it in his small kitchen table before taking the utensils out of the basket and placing it on the table in a fancy way.

Candles. Does he have candles? Spencer scrambles around his kitchen, like a chicken without its head, looking for candles and he finds it underneath the kitchen sink. He lights some of it up and props it into some glasses (he doesn’t have a candle holder he realizes after lighting it up).

With the lights dimmed down leaving the light from the window and the light from the candles, his dark apartment gives off a romantic, kind of comfortable, vibes. It was kind of perfect because with the books on his shelves and the lighting, it actually has the same vibes a library gives off.

He was ready now, bouquet of paper flowers in hand. He can’t believe how smooth things are going, minus the damn rain. Only thing that’s missing is you.

A knock comes to the door and he instantly opens it. There you were, hair a bit wet and messed up from the rain.

His future was bundled up in a cozy cardigan and a pair of jeans right in front of his eyes and he didn’t even know it.

“Hi.” Spencer smiles.

“Hi.” You smile.

-

“A little to the right. No. No. Too much right, now give it a little bit to the left.” You sigh, your hand under your chin, “No, no, baby, its crooked.”

“Love, can we do this later? The pancetta is going to burn.” Spencer laughs as he climbs down the ladder with the frame.

“But you said you’ll help me with putting up the frames!” You pout at him, Spencer chuckles before kissing your nose, “I know but you also asked for my famous carbonara and I can’t do both at the same time.”

“Hmmm. I still don’t think you can call it yours when its originally Dave’s.” You follow him to the kitchen, zigzagging through the boxes of books you’ve both barely opened.

“What he doesn’t know, won’t kill him.” He winks at you before giving the pancetta and onions a stir.

“It already smells good, love.” You snake your arms through his waist and lean your head on his back. Spencer lets go of the spatula and spins around to face you.

“Thank you, sweetheart. Go unbox some of the books and I’ll call you when its cooked so we can fix the frames. Okay?” Spencer kisses the top of your head and lets you go.

You walk out of the kitchen to the hallway full of boxes full of books. You chuckle as you open the nearest box and its just full of chemistry books. You push it to the room where Luke, Derek and Spencer has built shelves for all of your books. An olive green couch sits in the corner beside the built in fireplace.

Hmmm. This is your home library but as a former librarian the dewey decimal is calling you. But then again, the books you and Spencer have doesn’t have classifications on them. You began unpacking the chemistry books and placing it on the shelf. You can hear the distinct hiss of the pan and Spencer humming Kodaline’s The One.

You push in another box from the hallway to the room and its another one of Spencer’s, this one full of philosophy books. You start unpacking it to the shelf below the chemistry books before stopping as you pull out a book that doesn't belong with the philosophy books. A smile graces your face as your hands glides unto it. It was the book Spencer bought for you on your first anniversary.

The Peter Pan cover is a bit tattered, it was an older edition he found in your favorite old bookstore. You open the book and Spencer’s messy writing greets you with nostalgia.

“We are most alive when we are in love. Thank you for making me feel alive everyday for the past year. Happy Anniversary, love. I live a full life as I love you fully.”

You smile at the book before hugging it to your chest. You sigh deeply as you looked around the room and how it felt so surreal to be in the new home you share with Spencer.

“Love, I am finish. Come meet me in the hallway!” You leave the book on the shelf as you hear Spencer calling you.

“Are you helping me with the frames?” You clap, excited to finally put up the frames. Spencer smiles as he sees you excited to put up the pictures.

“Yes, okay you need to tell me if they’re straight okay?” He instructs before climbing the ladder.

“To the right, just a bit. Oh! Perfect!” You scramble to reach for another frame as he comes down the ladder to move it, “Here! This one.” He climbs again and you instruct him with directions for the frame again.

After a few more frames, he finally comes down and looks at the frames you asked to be put up.

“It’s pretty, isn’t it?” Spencer smiles down at you and gives your cheek a kiss as he wraps his hands around your waist, “It is. Thank you for framing them.”

The frames comes in different shapes and forms, the biggest one in the middle is the picture of your wedding day. Your wedding took place in a library you immediately fell in love with when looking for places to get married at.

In the picture, you were smiling, your head rested on Spencer's shoulder as he reads a Harry Potter book he found in the kids section. It was a candid moment, both of you running to the back of the shelves to get a moment to yourselves after the wedding and the photographer snapped it before leaving the two of you in peace.

Beside it are pictures with the team on the wedding day, some on thanksgiving, christmas, new year with the BAU team, some with your family, some with Diana and in the corner is a shadow box containing the paper bouquet that Spencer gave you on your first date, the same exact flowers that was in your hands as you walk down the aisle to him.

“So, how's the first six months of officially being a Reid-Y/L/N?” Spencer teases as he lets you go from the back hug to face you and you roll your eyes at him, “Oh very hard. They hear Reid and they immediately expect greatness.”

Spencer laughs, “Same as the last name Y/L/N.” This time your the one who laughs at his statement, “Uhhh. I am not the one with 3 PhDs and 3 BAs.”

“And I am not the one whose a New York Times best selling author.” Spencer laughs even more when he sees your nose crinkles, making his heart dance and swell in glee.

“Hey, let’s dance.” He takes your arms and leaves it on his shoulders as he wraps his arms on your waist.

“We don’t have music, you silly goofy boy.” Spencer rolls his eyes at the endearment used, “I’ll sing.” He hushes you down.

“You make my heart feel like it's summer when the rain is pouring down.” Spencer’s singing voice was soft and sweet in the edges. Most nights you lull him to sleep with your humming to keep the monsters at bay and some days, his better days, he’s the one who sings and these were the days you treasure the most.

“You make my whole world feel so right when it's wrong, that's how I know you are the one... That’s how I know you are the one.” He sways you to the gentle buzz of his voice. You close your eyes as he sings the same song he sings to your ears on the dance floor for you first dance as a married couple.

“When we are together, you make me feel like my mind is free and my dreams are reachable hmmm.” Spencer hums as he runs his hands on your back. Your head on his chest and your ear listening to the way his heart is beating for you.

“You know I never ever believed in love, I believed one day that you would come along and free me.” Spencer feels at ease as he sways and sings, knowing that he’ll have you in his arms for the rest of his life.

The song ends but you and Spencer continue to sway to the music of silence.

“Can you believe its been 4 years since our first date?” Spencer asks, in disbelief of how fast time is running when he’s with you. You pull away from his chest so you can face him. You find a small spark in Spencer’s eyes as he thinks fondly of the night.

“Really? 4 years since our first date got rained on and Penelope cried because we broke all her fairy lights?” Spencer laughs before protesting, “Hey! I paid for that!”

"4 years later and I still can't get enough of that damn carbonara." Spence cackles, like an evil villain, "Don't tell Rossi that I stole his recipe for my beautiful partner."

"4 years later and I am still completely in love with you." Spencer smiles as he leans down to place a small kiss on your temple.

"4 years since I almost completely lost my mind because I was so nervous about our date." You roll your eyes, "Love, our first date was perfect. We've had this debate how many times now?"

"19 times." Spencer answers and you pinch his nose before looking around the room that’s still full of unopened boxes, “See. We should probably eat lunch and unpack. Why do we even have so many boxes of books?”

“Honey, you were a librarian and you are a writer. I am a professor and FBI agent that can read 20,000 words per minute.” Spencer answers as he looks around the unpacked house.

You smile fondly at him before standing on your tiptoes a bit to reach him and give him a kiss and he immediately steadies you with his hands. Kissing you was intoxicating and Spencer loves every bit of it. You only pull away when the kiss finally takes away your breathe.

“I love you, Spence.” You smile as you hold his face in your hands, “I love you more, sweetheart.” He smiles at you as you untangle yourself from him.

“Let’s eat your famous carbonara and unpack the rest of our house. It doesn’t really feel like home when all we can see is boxes.” You giggle before dragging him to the kitchen, making Spencer sit on the island as you prepare the pasta he cooked. Spencer watches you as you sing and dance through the kitchen in one of his old cardigans.

He doesn’t say anything but you were wrong. Home is not four walls with unpacked boxes and hundreds of books.

Home was when you showed up bundled in a cardigan, wet from the rain for your first date with him and home is still you, four years later, bundled up in his old cardigans and singing songs that magically fills and heals the crevices of his heart.

-

the recipe i copied for the famous carbonara!

taglist (if you want to be added, please message me 🥰): @all-tings-diego @shemarmooresfedora @averyhotchner @samuel-de-champagne-problems @bingereid

[peace-coast-island]

Diary of a Junebug

Bake away the weekend with confetti cakes

There's soooo much cake in the kitchen, it's unreal. On one hand, I enjoyed making the cakes, but on the other hand, what were we thinking? I don't mean that in a bad way, I mean that as in it's so much work kind of way. Overall, all that hard work and effort was worth it as we got to enjoy a masterpiece at the end.

I think it helps that it was a group collab instead of a solo venture. If it's just me I probably would've used a cake mix and add one layer of frosting and call it a day. In this case, we had some friends visiting the camp and we all felt like doing something creative, so that's how this baking marathon came to be.

Although it was a lot of work - and a bit frustrating at times - making all these cakes from scratch and decorating them was fun and rewarding. To be honest though, I won't be doing that again anytime soon just because it takes up a lot of stuff and time, plus it's something you really have to be in the mood for. Still, I'd be up for doing something like that again, just not anytime in the near future.

Again, we made so much cake - I'm actually kinda worried that it might go to waste. Hopefully that won't be a problem, but still, seeing that much cake is a bit intimidating.

Visiting us at the camp is Sandi, Lea, and Chase, Lea's partner at the agency. Lea and the others have talked about Chase so it kinda feels like I sorta know him even though we didn't actually meet until now. Lea has been trying to get him to join her on her adventures with us but their schedules never aligned. I remember a couple years back he was planning to meet up with us but couldn't make it at the last minute. So it's good to finally meet him after all this time!

It's a bit unusual to see Sandi and Lea without DJ, Dell, and Em. I think this is the first time I haven't seen them all together. It's funny how you're so used to seeing one thing that when the pattern changes, it takes a bit of readjustment. Although Sandi, Lea, and the others are known as a team, they don't actually see each other too much outside of that.

They're practically family so they do keep in touch often but since Sandi accomplished her main purpose, everyone sort of went their separate ways. Not exactly disbanded as they still get together for missions once in a while, more like the whole crime fighting/retrieving lost treasures team is secondary compared to everything else going on in their lives. They pretty much admitted on separate occasions that the main reason why they continue taking on missions here and there is so they can have an excuse to hang out. Nothing like a good ol' heist to bring the team back together again!

When Sandi isn't out on missions, she's helping her mom out at the orphanage they run together. She says that she's really considering the idea of going to school to become a teacher, which I can totally see her doing. Problem is, how to get in, especially with an unusual background like hers. While reuniting with her mom has helped Sandi fill in some of the gaps of her past, there's still a lot missing and there's probably no way of knowing since her father's been dead for years. In short, what's stopping her is basically a potential legal nightmare - and given her history with some certain agencies, that just complicates things further.

Speaking of Sandi's complicated and cluttered past, an interesting development popped up. Something about an old acquaintance who turns out to be a half sibling through her father. What makes it complicated is that they both had agreed to leave that part of their lives behind so finding that out has left her with mixed feelings. It seems that the more she tries to dig up information on her father, she just gets left with more questions.

Lea and Chase are currently looking more into it, but it's a long shot. Apparently, Sandi's father was pretty much living a double life as his colleagues were unaware about Sandi and her mom for a long time. As for Sandi's friend, she, Lea, and Chase believe that it's likely that her dad never knew about him, or else they would've found something by now. In fact, how this information came out was pretty much an incidental finding, a random occurrence that wound up opening a can of worms.

Aside from that, things at the agency have been the same. Lea, as usual, solved cases with her vast knowledge on art and history while Chase did his part by wreaking havoc and catching the culprits. Sandi pops in once in a while as an informant, helping out in her own way. Given how they all are now, it's hard to believe that Lea and Chase used to work against Sandi and the others.

Them coming here was a bit of an impromptu trip. Lea and Chase had a bunch of vacation days they need to use up so they decided to plan something together. Then Lea extended the invitation to the others but they were unable to make it aside from Sandi, making it one of the rare occasions where it's just the three of them.

Chase has been described as a loose cannon, mainly by Lea. Compared to Lea and Sandi, he does stick out for being a bit extra, not in a bad way though. More like he tries, but ends up being clumsy and a bit of a mess, the kind who wants to help but ends up getting in the way. He and Lea are pretty much the brawn and brains kind of partnership where it doesn't seem like they'd get along but they surprisingly work together well. Sandi likes to roast him, as does Em and DJ, but they do admit that once they got him on their side instead of him working against them, he's actually a pretty cool guy.

Hanging out with them, especially outside of a mission or event has been fun. It's interesting and entertaining seeing Lea and Chase's dynamic - I can see how they get along at work. As for Sandi, she and Chase have a fun sibling-like kind of relationship where they mess around and banter with each other.

For some reason we all felt like we're in a baking mood so we watched a bunch of cake videos for inspiration. Between the four of us, we consider ourselves decent bakers so we decided to make a cake from scratch. It's not as intimidating as one would think, but it takes some prep work. But other than that, it's mostly just mixing different ingredients together.

Since we were feeling ambitious, we went for a bit of a complex recipe. By that, I mean we used a recipe from a pastry chef that takes a bit more work but isn't too hard to make. We went for confetti cake since we had all the ingredients. Plus it's been forever since I've had confetti cake and Sandi's never had it before.

And if baking a cake from scratch wasn't enough, we decided to make a bunch and decorate them! The first cake, our trial run, was a huge success so we made more. The recipe is really good - the cake is light and fluffy with a sweet vanilla flavor. Definitely something I'll be making again.

Now I want to try other recipes by Saffy like her chai coffee cake and Boston cream pie. But like I said, as much as I enjoyed making and decorating all these confetti cakes, I don't plan on doing that again anytime soon. You just gotta be in the mood for it, ya know?

We also used Saffy's recipe for merengue buttercream, which can be a bit finicky as timing's important - another reason why it's better to work in a group instead of solo. The result is a sweet, cloudlike frosting that goes well with the cake - or any kind of cake really. It's also fun to mix the frosting with food coloring, especially with the texture of the buttercream.

Along with decorating a bunch of small cakes, we put together a three tiered cake and went all out on that. I don't know how cake decorators do it, especially with big cakes. Shoutout to Chase and Sandi for doing most of the heavy lifting - literally and figuratively!

Decorating the cakes were a lot of fun. It kinda turned into a mini campsite event with various campers decorating their own cakes. Working on the big cake was fun and challenging but I think I prefer the simplicity of working on a smaller cake. Not too shabby for a bunch of first timers when it comes to the centerpiece!

As for the cake scraps, we made cake pops and decorated those too. It's so interesting seeing everyone's personality show through cake decorating. Lea goes for patterns, the methodical, organized type. I don't know how she has the patience to do all those details! Sandi likes to go for color with rainbows and star sprinkles. She also has a thing for galaxy and marble patterns. Chase goes for simplicity, usually with a layer of frosting and a bunch of sprinkles scattered about. And I, of course, went with florals and stars, though I still haven't quite gotten the hang of piping frosting yet so the flowers are a hit or miss. At least I can never go wrong with starry sprinkles!

Overall, I think the baking process was my favorite part of the whole thing. There's just something so satisfying about mixing together ingredients and watching them come together. Baking, as frustrating as it can be sometimes, is also fun as well as rewarding. It's a good thing we have Lea here to double check the measurements as that made things go by a lot more smoothly.

After the unveiling of the masterpiece, we threw a little party - with a feat like that, how could we not celebrate? At least we made a dent in our cake supply!

[drstrangefictions]

One-Shot

Bucky Barnes x Female Reader

Word Count: 2,558

Spoilers: Nothing.

Warnings: Death mention. Absolute tomfoolery. OOC Bucky, again, I know my bad. Absolutely just shits and giggles fic. Bucky Barnes warning lmao. Positive vibes with like one negative vibe.

“Are you going to tell me the point of this so-called fieldtrip?” Bucky looked at her. She was bobbing her head along to the song on the radio, mouthing the words. He was almost sure she didn’t hear him. However, he did want to know why he was being dragged out into the mountains; it was something she insisted on after disappearing for a few weeks. She didn’t tell him what she was doing, just that she would be gone. He wasn’t exactly complaining about it, he was just left in the dark about the whole thing. He didn’t really enjoy the suspense of surprises. He found most of the views during their obnoxiously long drive to be beautiful, almost made him forget how agitating the drive actually was. He was even surprised his neck wasn’t hurting with having stared out the window for such a long time or having stared at her for just about as long.

She put on hand on the gear shifter out of habit. She was used to manual sports cars and driving a smidge too fast for her passengers’ comfort. It wasn’t unusual for her to drive other vehicles either, she has driven S.H.I.E.L.D issued vehicles as well as trucks, such as the one her friend lent her for this trip. “If there was a point, you would’ve been told.”

Bucky pushed the seat back, so he was laying back, and slightly more comfortable. “Well are we almost there?” He sounded as though he were whining, he would be if he were stuck with anyone else.

“Man, do you hear that? Sounds like, hm, a little bitch.” She glanced at Bucky with a smirk. “Just hold your horses and let me get us there alive.”

He closed his eyes and chuckled. “Alive would be nice.” He crossed his arms over his chest. “Where is there anyway?”

(Y/N) turned up a dirt road. “Somewhere on this side of nature.” She tuned him out from then on, she was good at that. And it was good that she could do that, she’d like to be able to find their destination the first time. She paid extra attention to the road, hidden driveways along the path, and her GPS.

Bucky noticed they were passing a few cabins along the dirt path. He sat up looked over at (Y/N) who was concentrating too hard for him to ask her anything to confirm his suspicions about the fieldtrip. Even if she were to pay attention, she would still play it off. He was impressed with her ability to lie and keep this whole thing from him this whole time. She loved to talk, it was nearly impossible for her to keep any secrets or surprise him with anything. As for everyone else, Bucky is pretty sure no one even knows anything besides her name. He pulled the seat back up as they turned onto a hidden driveway and pulled up to a cabin.

“We are here! Alive!” (Y/N) parked the truck, grinning. She shut the ignition and slid out of the truck.

Bucky tried to get out of the truck only to find she had locked the doors on him again. “Just 5 hours ago, I was the childish one. Who’s being childish now?” He raised his voice at her from inside the truck. “Let me out.”

(Y/N) snickered and unlocked the truck for him while rolling up the truck bed cover. “Dumbass.” She said to herself.

“What was that, half-pint?” Bucky asked, slamming the door on accident. “I might just make you sleep out here with the bugs. You love bugs.” He walked over to the bed and started pulling out their suitcases. “Better than having to climb in, huh?”

She cringed, not offering him any other response. She fastened the cover. “I’ll still have to climb if I want to help you take everything out. I know you’re a big strong man and all, but that’s just not fair.”

“It’ll be a nice view for me.” Bucky told her casually. He walked away before he could see her reaction to place their suitcases by the door.

(Y/N) squinted her eyes and shifted her jaw to the side in annoyance. Of course, he would look. She unlocked the door to the bed and climbed up to push everything in the back towards the front. She promised Clint that she would practice her archery while she was out here, so he gave her a target to use and she brought her bow and arrows along. She put the target on top of the cooler so she wouldn’t damage it before she got to use it.

Bucky came back and looked at her with disappointment, she practically blocked herself in unless she was planning to jump over the side and mess up on landing as she does. He grabbed the target off the cooler and her bow and arrows. “I didn’t know you did archery.”

“Clint has been teaching me with his kids. They like to see who the best is and it’s never Clint. We never vote on him.” She climbed over the side and landed on the ground successfully.

“Not surprised there.” Bucky walked her archery gear to the porch. “Are you any good?”

“Probably better than anyone else would be unless they also secretly practice.” She grabbed the cooler and set it on the ground. “This will be fun; you’ll love it out here. No Sam. No Steve. No team. No working! No one but us.” She rolled the cooler to Bucky.

“Sounds great already.” He picked up the cooler and set it by the door near their suitcases. “I’ll get the waters and the snacks you insisted on bringing. Do you really need a large box of goldfish?”

“Are you still stuck on that? The answer is yes, I do. I’m going to unlock the door now.” She made her way to the door, opened the screen door, and search her keyring of keys for the one she needs. “Not you. No, no… There ya are.” She unlocked the door and pushed it open. She reached above her to lock the screen door in place.

“Have you gotten taller?” Bucky asked, walking up the porch steps. “I feel like you got taller. You can reach things now.”

She grabbed their suitcases and brought them in the cabin, setting them down by the stairs. “Looks absolutely like I left it a few weeks ago!” She set her hands on her hips and looked around proudly. She would pat herself on the back for her cleaning skills had she not already done so when she finished cleaning.

Bucky had found the kitchen on his own and already set the case of waters down near the table and set her snacks on the table. “Or ignore me, that works just as well.”

She stepped back outside and grabbed the cooler. “Well the plan was to leave you here and never come back, ignoring you is just the first step. I decided that was a stupid plan and I’ll just leave in the middle of the night. I’m gunna pull the archery stuff in then put things in places.” She set the cooler near the waters.

“I will start putting things in places.” Bucky used her words; he watched her walk away with a slight smirk. “Alright – pantry…” Bucky looked around the kitchen until he stopped at what should be the pantry. He swung the narrow door open. “Pantry.” He started putting her snacks in the pantry. He was feeling generous, he put them lower than he was originally planning to.

(Y/N) brought in her archery gear and unlatched the screen door, causing it to slam shut. “Shit! That was loud.” She nearly jumped out of her skin. She left the other door open as the breeze was nice. She stood for a moment, with her hands on her hips again, looking around the living room – just as I remember it… sort of, she smiled sadly to herself. She quickly walked back into the kitchen to help Bucky load the refrigerator with what they brought and a few of the water bottles.

“Let me guess, you already have a shopping list?” Bucky asked, closing the refrigerator door.

She looked in every overhead cabinet. “Yeah, I do. Just wanna stand and walk around for a bit first. Explore the place, have depressing flashbacks in the process. I was too busy cleaning and replacing some things to be able to get it all out before this week.” She climbed up onto the counter to grab a plate she decorated years ago with the help of her older sibling.

“Please –.” Bucky prepared to catch her in case she fell from the counter. He hated when she got up on counters and anything she could fall off of.

She turned and sat on the counter facing him with the plate in her hands. “Y’know, I thought my parents tossed all these. They were up here this whole time.” She showed him the plate. It was white around the edges, black, blue, purple, and red created a very child-quality galaxy as a background to a rocket ship. “Always wanted to be an astronaut. Being an Avenger is close enough, right? Went to space, got my ass handed to me by a Titan… y’know. Space things.”

“After hearing about that, I don’t want to go to space. If the world is at its end and we need to leave, I will die here.” Bucky told her. He took the plate from her hands. “Did you paint yourself in the rocket ship?”

“Abso-fuckin’-lutely!” She grinned proudly. She started to turn to kneel on the counter again.

He grabbed her quickly. “I will put this up for you.” He kept his arm around her, and he leaned forward to put the plate back where she grabbed it from. He stepped back and pulled her off the counter. “Should I even ask what kind of mess you left for yourself?”

“No mess.” She laughed. “Just stuff to look at… and find. My brother was very strange, he made hidden compartments, all full of secrets probably – I don’t remember where any are.”

He rested his chin on the top of her head. “Well, I see where you get that from, Miss I-hide-everything-from-everyone. I would like to see what kind of disaster child you were that turned you into a disaster adult.”

“Secret compartments first.” She looked towards the living room, already knowing where one is, maybe I do remember... “Not sure what he hid and if anything is still in there, honestly… I just hope it’s not something gross.”

“Afraid of something jumping out at you?” He ran his fingers through her hair. He could stand here with her in his arms for a long time.

She scoffed. “Yeah, sure I am… Not.” She is.

“I will admit, you were right to take me out here.” Bucky said, staring at the fire in front of them. It was comforting. And warm enough to where they didn’t need to sit close to each other, but they did anyway. He watched the marshmallow (Y/N) dropped in there burn up.

She smiled. “I know. You needed this. We have a whole six days left! Just you, me, the firepit, and that’s really it. Ooh, I would like to do something like this with the whole team one day. It would be so fun. White water rafting, zip-lining! Hiking!” She popped a marshmallow in her mouth. She couldn’t help herself they were right next to her.

Bucky looked at her, she was happy out here. She looked a lot happier than she usually did. He was definitely happy away from everyone. “Yeah? The whole team? Sounds like a recipe for disaster if you ask me.”

She nodded, she knows he is right about that, but it would still be nice or just fun. Fun doesn’t have to mean nice. “Just pair up with Sam for white water rafting and push him in the water, problem solved.”

“All of my problems would be solved if I did that.” Bucky leaned back slightly, not wanting to be startled by the sudden swinging of the bench. “Just don’t tell him.”

“I’m sure he already knows that you would do anything to get rid of him.” She scooted herself unnecessarily closer to Bucky, leaving no gap between them. “I tried to get rid of you when we were just friends. I tried to sell you to Sam once, he wouldn’t pay a whole dollar. He wouldn’t even take you for free.”

Bucky laughed. He knew she was always up to something. “Of course, you tried that. Next time sell me online.” He suggested playfully. It would be wrong for him to say he didn’t try to push her away either, except he was more obvious about it.

“Well shit, I can’t do that now! I’d hate to get rid of you. I actually like having you around.” She rested her head on his shoulder.

He had his hand on her thigh. “Yeah, I believe that.”

She giggled. “Deep down I know you actually do.”

They sat in silence watching the flames dance around each other and listened to the wood crackle. There were a few times when (Y/N) passed him a marshmallow because he still hadn’t taken the bag away from her.

“Where do you see yourself in the future?” She asked randomly and out of curiosity.

Bucky’s eyes followed the smoke. “Why do you ask?”

She closed her eyes. “Just something we’d talk about around the fire when I was younger. None of us got to see those futures we saw ourselves living. The twins wanted to act. My older brother, the secret one, wanted to travel the world. I was always a little more realistic… I wanted to go to school to be a doctor. The twins didn’t make it far in life. My brother was a H.Y.D.R.A agent undercover at S.H.I.E.L.D, and I was a S.H.I.E.L.D agent. And I did what I had to do. I didn’t think I’d end up in that kind of life, and then being an agent, I didn’t think I would have something like this. Now I’m here with you.” She snaked her arm around his.

“You wanna know where I see myself in the future?” He asked, she nodded against his shoulder. “I see myself with you because I can’t seem to get rid of you. Not sure if we still save the world, but if we do, I couldn’t ask for a better partner. If we don’t, there’s no risk of losing you… Where do you see yourself now that you’re with me?” He asked, looking at her.

“Somewhere I can actually call home, specifically wherever you are. This is going to sound so dumb; I am so sorry that it’s dumb… but hear me out, very Addams Family-esque life.” She smiled out of embarrassment. “Maybe not as weird as them… but you get the idea, right?”

He expected no less from her. He couldn’t help but smile at the thought of it. She saw herself with him… a loving couple… with kids. A loving family is what she saw. “I get it.” He would be lying if he said didn’t want that too.

[grimelords]

I have been unbelievably busy for all of 2020 so far. Starting a new job and crunching to finish an old one, it's been very good but it has also meant that I haven't had the downtime I'd have liked in order to write long screeds about when drums sound good in songs so my December and January playlists unfortunately never got finished. They will exist as 'lost' playlists in the grimelords canon where you will simply have to listen to them and have your own thoughts about the songs instead of having your judgement clouded by me saying things like 'this sounds nice' and 'I love when the guitar goes woo-eee'.

You can listen to them here:

December https://open.spotify.com/playlist/4crPEVSPwftPpWl14xUrXF

January https://open.spotify.com/playlist/25MP7onYLCwWRYBIi0u3yc

As far as this, my February playlist goes: It's great! It's two and a half hours. The songs sounds nice and the guitars go woo-eee. I was worried I wouldn't be able to listen to as much music with my new job but it turns out I'm listening to more than ever which is extremely nice. Please enjoy, and if you'd like to subscribe to this playlist please do so here: https://tinyletter.com/grimelords

Listen to this playlist here: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/3ZraEZOeS6qvVxfnz3AJS9

Ballad Of The Skeletons - Allen Ginsberg, Paul McCartney, Phillip Glass and Lenny Kaye: I had a dim childhood memory of this 1996 Hottest 100 funny skeleton song that my sister randomly brought up this month and was was shocked to find out that somewhere deep in my brain the part where the electric chair skeleton says “hey what’s cooking???” was still stored. I was also shocked to find out that the funny skeleton song I remembered from when I was a kid was actually a collaboration between Allen Ginsberg, Paul McCartney and Phillip Glass and was an unexpected hit on MTV and Triple J in 1996 for an as yet unknown reason.

I Can Go With You - Sam Burton: This song came up in my Discover Weekly, and I was so excited to listen to more of this 70s singer songwriter I've never heard of before who has no doubt had a long and illustrious career and was shocked to find out that not only is this song from 2020, it is also the first and so far only release by Sam Burton and his debut album is coming out sometime this year. I love how plain it is, and the first time I heard it it made no impression on me until a couple of hours later when I realised I was humming the melody to myself. It has this decepitive simplicity to it, and it sounds like a song you've always known which is really about as good a compliment as you can give a song. I also love this statement from him: “I was writing a song a day for 30 days as a personal challenge to myself. I Can Go With You came near of that practice and I considered it a throwaway at the time. After recording most of the album I still needed a couple more songs and decided to throw it on and we recorded it live followed by two others. When I listened back it ended up being one of the tracks I was happiest with on the record.” I love when artists are asked about songs and they have no divine inspiration to relate, just a process of daily work where they're like "well, I wrote it, like I always do. Did the chords and the words and everthing just like normal. I write hundreds of these things and this one came out pretty good. I don't know what else to tell you."

Wild Dogs - Colter Wall: This is a song by Billy Don Burns who you can probably expect to see on this playlist next month, and who as I understand it is one of these 'real' country guys that have been around for a million years and only ever had success when other people sang their songs. So it's very nice of Colter Wall to continue that tradition for him. I love the way this song takes the metaphor to a place of almost uncomfortable literalism, a tryst metamophising into something private, bloody and feral. The subtle way the lap steel whines slowly along in the background before stepping out and taking centre stage once the song picks up steam near the end is a marvel too.

Tom's Diner - Suzanne Vega: I had a live version of this randomly recommended to me by youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DkYPge6ZKSQ and it made me see this song that I'd always been sort of aware of in a new light and really properly appreciate it for the first time. Somehow I'd never noticed the last verse where it moves from literalism to memories, and of course that's sort of the moment that ties the whole song together. What I really appreciate about the acapella arrangement is that it feels like this is a song that's existed a million times before but she's the first person to actually write it down and record it. Everyone's made up a little dishwashing song or a little walking song, reciting some to-do list in your head. It's an entire genre that exists under people's breath for a few minutes and gets immediately forgotten.

If You Don't Know Now, You Never Will - Drugdealer: I could have sworn this was a Tobias Jesso Jr song. I really just assumed it was until I looked at the credits. It's such a nice song though and I'm glad this sort of 70s californian vibe is making a quiet comeback because it is just uniformly pleasant and it's nice to hear these sorts of arrangements, with the accenting violin runs and things like that. All the extra decorations and ornamentations that have sort of disappeared.

Crimson Tide - Destroyer: I absolutely love this new Destroyer album because it just feels like such pure uncut Destroyer. I’ve always thought of him as a sort of 400 year old vampire lounge singer who is just amusing himself at this point and so the cover art has really confirmed my suspicions on that front. The lyrics through this whole album are so good, the sort of stream of consciousness strangeness like ‘when lightning strikes twice the funeral goes completely insane’ that takes a on such gravity because he sings it with complete deadpan seriousness.

Truth (feat Alicia Keys and The Last Artful, Dodger) - Mark Ronson: I didn't really give this album a chance when it came out but ever since I found out Alicia Keys is good now (Time Machine) I've been looking for more good Alica Keys work and found one here. The Last Artful, Dodger is one of the worst artist names I think I've ever heard but she absolutely kills it on the way she says biiiiitch so I'll forgive it.

Surf & Turf - Boldy James + The Alchemist: Alchemist's production on this whole album is so incredible. He really just lets Boldy go and doesn't get in his way like good production should. Especially on the opening verse where Boldy James sticks with that loping flow for so long in 3s over 4 that matches that arpeggios in the beat, it's just a perfect harmony of rapper and producer.

Fat Mac - Duke Deuce: Misogyny in rap is a real issue that nobody seems really allowed to talk about because it's obviously very complicated, and this song some real classic 'stay in the kitchen' type woman hating in it and is basically incredibly callous and cruel throughout. However this beat is hot and there is also a part about a third of the way through where he says "fuck her till that pussy fart" and then makes a big fart noise, so.

Set It Up (feat. Trina) - Kamaiyah: I only found out about Kamaiyah's fantastic 2016 album A Good Night In The Ghetto about two weeks before her new one came out so I've been on a real Kamaiyah hype for a little while now. She's just fantastic. I love this song because I love the part where Trina seemingly out of the blue threatens to piss in my mouth. The first time I heard it I said 'wow!' out loud.

Come As You Are - Greg Phillinganes: There's something going on with the pop math in this song that I just can't put my finger on. It feels for all intents and purposes like this should be a hit. The melody is great. The big synth voice is great, it's got extremely fatty bass. It's great! But something about the structure of it is just off, it's got too many sections or something. Which kind of makes me love it more really.  

Devotion - Pure Bathing Culture: What surprised me the most about this song is the secret shredding happening throughout. It feels like a sort of clean and cool guitar that hasn’t existed in the wild since the Lethal Weapon soundtrack and it adds such an energy to this already completely wonderful song.

Paper Cup - Real Estate + Sylvan Esso: The production on this song is just so beautiful. The violin melody and the pillow soft synths really add such an extra dimension to it. The tone on everything really. The guitar in the solo. Every time I listen to this song I just want to listen to it again because it goes down so smooth.

Mark Zuckerberg - Nap Eyes: I’m a very big fan of the way this song transitions from a sort of TMBG novelty song halfway through into a lonely and beautiful thing instead. It’s like he got distracted and wandered off in the middle of his set but the camera followed him. I also haven’t heard a lyric in a long time that made me bark laugh so instantly as “And what does he do with all that sand? He collects sand right? I think I read that somewhere. Seems innocent enough.”

Viking Hair - Dry Cleaning: I fell in love with this band immediately on hearing this song. The way the spoken lyrics sit in a place of almost coherence, dipping between mysterious phrases and earnest admissions feels like Life Without Buildings for a new generation. I love the feeling of a huge crush at the centre of this song that comes through achingy in every single word, even when she's talking about abandoned refrigerators.

LeBron James - Do Nothing: This is my number one song this month I think. I've listened to it every single day and I cannot wait to see what this band does once they've got more than a couple of songs out. It's my absolute favourite kind of lyrics: the kind that sounds like you just wrote down every one-sided phone conversation you overheard on the bus and then the music is some halfway point between Black Midi and Franz Ferdinand. What else do you need!

Can I Receive The Contact? - The Spirit Of The Beehive: The Spirit Of The Beehive's album is one of the best I heard this month. The way the production incorporates sound collage and samples without diluting the immediacy of the songwriting is really something special that feels hard to pull off in a rock context but sounds effortless through this whole album. The way this shifts at the end into the odd time section is so great and really the way the whole album flows like one long track is just amazing. Please listen, I'm obsessed.

An Air Conditioned Man - Rolling Blackouts Coastal Fever: There is so much space in Rolling Blackouts songs. They just go and go, sitting in this great jam space without feeling shaggy. The tempo across the album stays pretty consistently at this breezy, upbeat, driving speed that makes it feel like as soon as one song ends the next one just picks up exactly where it left off. It almost feels like a studio confines them and they'd be better off just recording their album live at a show where every song can go for 8 minutes like it wants to.

Leak -Truth, yesnoyesnoyes- - Boris: I got to see Boris and Merzbow this month, which was a great treat for me but it was also at a seated theatre venue which was a very strange choice. Sitting down and clapping politely as Merzbow pressed the screaming button feels odd, like being at an 1800s World's Fair show about the wonders of electricity or quite literally like being the guy in the chair getting blown away by the speakers in the Maxell ads. I bought earplugs for the show but ended up pulling them out for the last three songs or so to properly experience it, and it was fucking great. Something I was thinking about after the show is that it's interesting how Boris mostly have clean vocals, and really approach metal as an idea from and angle that's more shoegaze than Slayer. Aside from the immense volume, there isn't a lot about their music that I would describe as agressive, even most of what Merzbow added to the set was just extra feedback frequency noise, not atonal agression. I don't mean this in a trve kvlt way, more like it's interesting how they've taken the aesthetics of metal and refined them into pure amplifer worship, in their words, by either playing straight drone, or just playing normal hard rock at inhuman volumes. Boris are very good is what I'm saying, and I can't wait to listen to more of their extremely large discography.

Nameless Streets - Defeater: I've never really listened to much hardcore and I'm not really sure why. I've listened to Defeater's first two albums to death though so maybe it's time to branch out. What I love about this song, and this band in general is the vocal delivery. In a lot of agressive music from metal to screamo, because the agression and emotion is always sitting at a 10 the nuance can get lost and it becomes a sort of white noise, but Defeater have a nice way of backing off musically and vocally here and there to let the hard hits really hit hard. The outro to this song is also some absolutely world class snare work, building a tension bed in the simplest way thats relieved when the rest of the band comes crashing back in.

Boys In Town - Divinyls: I love the true desperation in this song. The trapped in a small town, surrounded by fuckers stress that gives way in the second half to just screaming "get me out of here!!". I am also interested in the evolution of the phrase 'too much, too young' and would like to know whether this song is referencing the song by The Specials, and if the Defeater song on this playlist is referencing this song or The Specials song, or if all three came up with it independently. It's a simply enough phrase, I suppose they could have. Who cares, really.

Body By Crystal - Spike Fuck: Come on a journey with me and imagine a world where Alex Cameron makes good music. That's Spike Fuck! The sort of burned out, past their prime singer desperate for a hit in any sense type of character - except actually put together with some heart and emotion and not an 80s comic book writer's understanding of human lows. I cannot wait to hear more from Spike Fuck.

Rogue Wave - Aesop Rock: It is something of a marvel how consistently high quality Aesop Rock's work is. For all his verbosity and expansive vocabulary he seems to never veer into white guy rap god flexing for the sake of it. Even a song like this that's 3 minutes of dense verses with nothing resembling a hook doesnt feel exhausting, it just feels like a series of extremely pleasing words and images like "take it where the warlocks lock horns, soda pop, popcorn / top notch gore set to Bach over fog horns" that makes my brain go "nice".

Momentary Bliss (feat. Slowthai and Slaves) - Gorillaz: I love the strange rollout Gorillaz are doing for this album, building the tracklist one song at a time. It's a nice way to force close listening, especially in songs with odd structures like this. I love hearing how different prouction changes Slowthai's approach; on this and Deal Wiv It that he did with Mura Masa it feels a lot brighter than anything on Nothing Great About Britain and there's a playfulness in his flow that comes through accordingly. Gorillaz are always moving around musically but I love how much of a live band feel this has compared to the more studioy sound that killed their last album for me.

We Will Always Love You (feat. Blood Orange) - The Avalanches: I am so excited at the possibility of a new Avalanches album already, and this is the perfect song to have as a lead single because it functions more like a teaser. Like 'would you like an hour more of this kind of beautiful, loving dream?'

Tar Sequence - Lalo Schifrin: I found out a little while ago that the local news theme when I was growing up was actually this song from the score to Cool Hand Luke, and according to a bunch of other guys in the youtube comments it was the local news theme for a lot of stations across America as well. The scene is of a prison road gang working under the blazing sun, and I'm sure someone could write a thinkpiece about the soundtrack to the nightly news, and really the platonic ideal of news themes in general stemming from the score to a scene about prison labour. But not me! I'm just going to write this little post and say we all owe Lalo Schifrin our lives for inventing the sonic pallette of kung fu AND the news, which is an incredible achievement whichever way you slice it.

When You - Tha Pope: It's a little bit of a shame that footwork is 'over' now but I suppose that's the way of things. The intro to this song is an absolute all timer for me. The delay soaked tag, the extended organ lick and then a total gear shift into this shrieking vocal sample that sounds like something has gone wrong but is revealed in actuality to be the centre of the whole track. I absolutely love Pope's little adlib at the start, and halfway through when he brings it back - it injects some real humanity into this cacophonous, volatile song and lets you know someone's done this on purpose, they've not just turned every dial to 10 and pressed play.  

Jonny/Jonny (Reprise) - Faye Webster: I am absolutely in love with the tone of Faye Webster's voice and especially the way she slowly slides up to the note at the end of every line in the verse. This is a song that belongs to the great genre of songs that sound like they were entirely written and performed while laying on the floor and staring at the ceiling. The reprise here comes back at the end of the album and I love it so much. It feels like a Sex And The City monologue set to music, an underexplored genre I'd definitely like to hear more of.

Holes - Matt Berninger: Matt Berninger of The National covered Mercury Rev's Holes for a series of charity 7"s that Planned Parenthood are doingand I really love his take on it. It's a difficult song to cover because it is so beloved, and I think he does really well to not smooth out the arrangement into any sort of easy listening version. The rumbling piano and the extra vocals that mirror the original saw sound near the end are just wonderful. The part that always breaks my heart in this song is the "bands" line at the end and he really does it perfectly without being overdramatic.

Ta Aro - Nadia Reid: I love the way this song is just soaked in tension and potential energy. She has a beautiful way of holding a note just past the edge of her breath, like when she sings 'glory hallelujah' or 'I am stronger' and in the wordless refrain that just draws me in. Then the way it all closes in on itself and shadows close in at the end while it swells to this beautiful thunderstorm of sound. Just great.

Purify - Neurosis: Someone had a tweet a while ago that was like 'listen to a new album every day in February and write about it' and I thought 'fuck it why not' and started doing that. I kept a little note in my phone of every album I listened to that I'd never heard before, and I ranked them out of 5 so I could remember which ones I liked. I ended up listening to 49 new albums which surprised me, and it was surprisingly easy to do as well so I've decided to keep doing it in March as well. Highly recommended. A nice side effect of constantly searching for new things to listen to is it's given me a chance to hear bands that I've always heard about and know the name of but never actually listened to for one reason or another, which is how I got to Neurosis. It's nice to hear this kind of industrial 90s metal that I'd only ever previously heard in Tool from another angle, and it is especially nice to hear bagpipes in a drone metal context - a thought I'd had independently about a week before hearing this album and was glad to have willed into existence before me.

Shallow Sun - Real Estate: Time! I love a song about aging that mentions specific years and ages so you can count along on your fingers. '25 in 2010... so he was 24 when they put out in their first album.. 39 in 24.. so he's... 35 now.. and i'm 28... which means I'm... 3 albums behind..'

Quand Vas Tu Retrer - Melody's Echo Chamber: I'll listen to any song in 5/4. It is simply groovy. This song is so beautifully textured it feels like you can just get completely lost in the sound while the groove moves it along.

Living Through Another Cuba - XTC: I think I've posted this song on one of these playlists before but fuck it, the more time passes the more I think this might be one of the best songs ever written and a complete and total encapsulation of the cold war mood. The absolute maniac resigned powerlessnes on full display, screaming and shouting about pullings fins from an atom bomb and the absolute certainty that even if the world isn't destroyed this time it'll all come around again soon enough anyway.

Time - U.S. Girls: I am a huge proponent of the long song at the end of the record as a concept, and really I believe every song should be the long song at the end of the record if at all possible. This amount of colour in this jam is just incedible, it never gets weighed down or waylaid it just keeps moving though an ever shifting kaleidoscope and I absolutely love it. It also reminds me of Los Bitchos who were on one of my secret lost playlists from December so it's nice to have their vibe represented here at least. This song also interestingly ties into a thought I was having this week about the limits of music wherein time is the only immutable constant. In all of life music is an inescapable constant of course, but in music especially compared to visual art or written art, time is an inexorable force. You simply cannot bend time in music, a song or performance will always have a duration that will define it, short or long, which cannot be muted or played with in the same way that rhythm or tonality can. 4'33" is a good example of that, being devoid of everything except time. When there is nothing, there is still time. Canyons of time.

Bad Magic - Weyes Blood: I got to see Weyes Blood a couple of weeks ago and I feel extremely blessed that I did. She's just amazing. She played this song solo as her last encore, and she's in a sort of interesting position of blowing up majorly on her fourth album so people (myself included) weren't overly familiar with her older stuff. So when she said 'this is a song called Bad Magic' everyone clapped politely and one woman right up the back screamed "oh my GOD??" which is the kind of personal, just for her, singular experience I'm always here for. Hearing this song for the first time in that setting has really made me fall in love with it. The thing that's always alienated me a little abot Weyes Blood's earlier work, and the thing she changed so dramatically on Titanic Rising is the structuring of her songs. Titanic Rising embraces pop songwriting so wonderfully where her earlier work was so much shaggier and harder to access as a result - but in this song I love it. This song is meandering and long and wanders around in circles and I'm here for every second of it.

Listen to this playlist here: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/3ZraEZOeS6qvVxfnz3AJS9

[babygirlwolverine]

Positive 20 Questions Tag Game

1.) Name 4 fictional characters who showcase your personality the best, with explanations if you want.

- Tinkerbell (Peter Pan): I very much relate to her, because I also am possessive over the people I love and also need attention all the time or I die hahah. But also she’s sassy and spunky and goes after what she wants, and I love that. She’s persistent and determined and willing to take out anything in her path. And I think all of those things sum up me pretty damn well.

- Dean Winchester (Supernatural): not only have I seen the connection, but my sister and several friends have also told me how similar I am to Dean. The way I bottle things up and avoid dealing with my emotions. How I would die for the people I love because I care for them that strongly that I couldn’t bear to live in a world without them. I’m sarcastic and witty and sassy just like Dean is. Just like Dean, I put up a tough guy front and act like things don’t both me, but really I’m an emotional teddy bear who doesn’t know how to deal with all the things I feel. I also tell ridiculous and stupid jokes and puns and normal get eyerolls from my sister for it, but it’s totally worth it.

- Tony Stark (MCU): I could go on and on about how similar I am to Tony. From wearing my heart on my sleeve to trying to make the right decisions and screwing things up in the process. Just like Tony, I’m sarcastic and smart. But also like Tony, I have a ton of mental baggage. I struggle and suffer with anxiety and panic attacks, too. Just like Tony, there isn’t anything I wouldn’t do for the people I love. And I hope, like Tony, I learn from my mistakes and try every day to be better and work harder. A lot of my mannerism is just like Tony, the way he uses sarcasm and wit and banter as a front to cover how vulnerable he is. I do the exact same thing. I’m no where near as smart as Tony is, but I’d like to think in difficult situations I let my brain switch into puzzle solving mode just like he does.

- Riley Poole (National Treasure): Riley is my smol bean. I swear he is me in male movie persona. Nerdy and sometimes a little slow on the uptake, but wicked smart in areas most people aren’t. Dedicated and loyal to my friends/family no matter what else is going on. Not always the main hero, but the relatable one everyone loves. Able to do things people don’t expect of me, and to do the things people do expect of me on top of that. Always in the background, working my ass of, just like Riley is. And always seeking the approval of my loved ones, just like Riley. Brave and smart and full of quippy one liners and great comebacks.

2.) Aesthetic?

-  pastel colors, flowers, hippie vibes, glitter and sparkles, sunsets

3.) Favorite musical/play? (If you’ve never seen a musical or play, one you’d be interested in seeing?

- The only musical I’ve ever seen is The Very Potter Musical (oops). I’m not really a musical or play kind of person. I much prefer movies and TV shows. But hey, I can still sing a ton of the songs from AVPM and said references to it so many times even my parents know them.

4.) What is the best compliment you’ve ever received?

- either “for some reason you remind me of Marilyn Monroe highkey” or it was this client I was working with as a vet tech assistant and she said to me “you are the best technician I have ever had work with my dog. You are going to be a wonderful and compassionate doctor and I’d love to be your client in the future” and y’all like she literally complimented me so much she even told my boss how much she adored me and my work ethic and I literally went into the back of the clinic and cried after she left because I’ve never felt so strongly that I’m meant to be in the veterinary field.

5.) How many times have you been in love?

- twice. Once was with the girl I had my first kiss with (actually there was many many kisses with her). She was my first love. I mean I really fell for her. She was a lot of firsts for me. And my first boyfriend. He led me on though and played me even though I fell for him and he knew that. So that sucked. 

6.) Embarrassing story or fact about yourself that makes you laugh now?

- When I was 9, I was running in the playground at school and tripped over this tree stump that was like kept there by the school for some reason (I can’t remember). But I tripped ad badly tore up my left hip. I mean like blood everywhere, massively bandages, the whole 9 yards. It healed over and there’s no scar now, but it was super embarrassing to trip over it in front of my entire class and to really badly hurt myself, and this was all like a month after I had just moved to the town and just started school. Way to make a fool out of myself from the very beginning.

7.) Favorite Disney/Pixar movie?

- Peter Pan. See my above answer about why I love Tinkerbell. Peter Pan is also my favorite because I love the idea of being able to escape some place and be young forever and forever free and happy. The idea of being able to just enjoy the simple things in life without the weight of the world on your shoulders.

8.) Favorite flower or plant?

-  Plumerias. They are just absolutely beautiful and they smell amazing and their colors are vibrant and beautiful and I just love them.

9.) What’s your favorite holiday?

- Christmas, without a doubt. My mum adores Christmas and she instilled that same love in me. The music, the lights, the decorations, the cheer, the happiness, the gift giving. All of it. It’s just such a happy time in my household and it’s what I look forward to all year because it’s just warmth and happiness radiating in my family.

10.) Name three things that made you laugh or smile this past week.

- @deanscastiel79 sending me messages every day to check on me and to see if I’m okay. Nothing makes me happier than someone noticing if I’m being quiet or if I’m MIA and checking on me and sending me things to make me smile.

- Just seeing the amount of likes and reblogs my destiel fics are getting. And the amount of followers I’ve gained since I started posting destiel fics. I’ve literally gained more than 25 followers in a couple weeks. It blows my mind. And seeing like the notes continue to climb on my fics and then having someone reach out to comment and personally message me to tell me how much they liked one of the fics I wrote. It makes me smile so much my cheeks hurt.

- My puppy, Rocket. He’s the biggest goofball in the world. But he’s so damn affectionate it’s unreal. The amount of love and cuddles and kisses he gives me almost hourly every single day literally fills my heart to bursting. On my worst days, he’s the only thing that can make me smile. He makes me feel loved.

11.) What song would you play to introduce yourself to someone?

- Rare by Selena Gomez. Because you know what? I am rare. I’m special and unique and proud of who I am. And maybe not everyone can see that, but that’s fine, because I can and will find people who do see that and who cherish me and treat me right. “I don’t have it all, I’m not claiming to, but I know that I’m special.” My favorite lyrics of the song. Because I know I don’t have it all, but I do have so much to offer the world, and I’m ready to share that with the right people.

12.) Name something that truly makes you feel peaceful even at your most stressed moments.

- I’m a Maladaptive Daydreamer. When I’m most stressed, I’ll let myself go into one of those daydreams until I feel calm again. I let those characters ground me. Either that, or spending some time with Rocket (my puppy mentioned earlier). Because there’s nothing that makes me feel better than puppy cuddles.

13.) What do you, did you, or would you study at college?

- For my undergraduate, I studied and got degrees in Biology and English (Concentration in Creative Writing) with a minor in Chemistry. I’m currently in grad/med school studying Veterinary Medicine and earning my DVM (Doctor of Veterinary Medicine).

14.) This is kind of a weird one, but which outfit of yours makes you feel most like yourself?

- It would either be high waisted shorts and a crop top/tank top/hippie shirt or a summer dress.

15.) What is a quote you live by?

- “Grateful for where I’m at. Excited about where I’m going” and “It always seems impossible until it’s done.”

16.) Name the funniest playlist name you have.

- My playlists don’t have weird names. I just have playlists for different artists. I have a playlist called “Soft Songs” for when I’m stressed or need music to sleep to. I had started a playlist called “Down and Dirty” for when I was writing smut fics and needed some inspiration, but the app on my phone wiped it and I was too lazy to remake it again. Maybe I will when I have some more time on my hands so I can have some inspiration to write some destiel smut fics.

17.) Make a reference to an inside joke you have with someone you love with zero context.

- “Why are you looking at me like that?” “Because you’re Skipper Sophie.”

18.) What is a message you would give your younger self if given the chance?

- Don’t let anyone tell you who you can and can’t be. There is always light at the end of the tunnel, and there is always people who will love and support you. And if your gut tells you something isn’t right, trust it.

19.) Who is your favorite family member? (If you have no good blood family members, feel free to mention someone in your found family)

- My sister. She’s the one person I can go and talk to about anything and everything. We can talk for hours. She always has my back. She boosts me up when I need it. She’s my inspiration and my support system. I don’t think I could live without her by my side. She’s my rock and I love her with everything in my heart and more.

20.) What’s a secret dream of yours?

- To publish a book. I know I’ve gone down the medical path as a career, but someday I would love to write my own novel and have it published.  

tagging: @deanscastiel79 @singingninja4 @themarvelavenger @seekinsideanimus @fadinglight123 @nonthebinary @pizzamanhedelivers @proudace @beatmetothesnitch @s-l-u-m-p-i-e @vcastiel

[houseofzoey]

Characters

Zoey Zoey’s role in this book was minimal. She spent the first half of the book on the Isle of Skye, deliberately avoiding returning to Tulsa because she didn’t want to deal with Neferet and the fight against Darkness (also school, which is pretty stupid given how irrelevant her classes have been for most of the series). This could have been a great chance to show how burdened Zoey is, how complicated and frightening her responsibilities are and how ill-prepared she feels to deal with them, but the author never deals with it in a meaningful way.

First, Zoey has never really done much of anything in this series. She’s an extremely passive character who desperately lacks agency and only acts because the plot (or Nyx) forces her to. For her to complain about being stressed and needing a break feels bratty and disingenuous. Moreover, she does a really terrible job of giving any consideration toward the consequences of taking a break. She knows that her role is pivotal to stopping Kalona – she knows that her not being around means Kalona and Neferet win. Aphrodite has had multiple visions to this effect. But Zoey never once thinks about this, nor does she think about what it means to leave her friends to deal with Neferet and Kalona and Darkness in general. She literally only thinks about how this situation affects her. That’s not the perspective of a stressed and overworked leader; that’s the attitude of a spoiled brat who doesn’t care about anyone but herself.

She doesn’t grow or mature or come to any important realizations while she’s hiding on the Isle of Skye, though I get the sense that P.C. Cast did intend for something to that affect. Zoey was meant to be scared and tired and in need of a break, but eventually had to come to terms with the fact that she can’t hide in paradise forever and needs to go back to her old life. But she doesn’t. There’s no self-reflection. There’s no sense of change in her attitude or behaviour. She literally only returns to Tulsa because Jack died and she needs to attend (and lead) a funeral.

Moreover, P.C. Cast perfectly arranges the plot so that Jack’s death never interferes with all the magical frolicking and specialness that Zoey gets basked in on Skye. She’s able to learn about Old Magick and dance with sprites at her leisure, explore the sexual side of her relationship with Stark without urgency or interruption (we’ll get to that), and just generally have a completely worry-free vacation. Like, the fate of her friends and the fight against Neferet/Darkness is barely on her mind unless it’s specifically brought up. She even gets the pleasure of being praised for her specialness and bowed to by a queen.

Zoey’s relationship with Stark takes an important step in this book, what with them having sex for the first time, but the whole thing is handled so poorly. For one thing, Zoey regards having sex as meaning she’s in a “Real Relationship” now, which is a super unhealthy perspective to encourage teens to have toward sex. Someone having sex with you does not mean they are in love with you and it’s a serious relationship, and presenting it in this way opens up the possibility for very dangerous, harmful manipulation. Moreover, Zoey and Stark make a big deal about tying their wishes for their future to the Hanging Tree and swearing to be together forever – even though, out of text, P.C. Cast has said multiple times that she thinks it’s stupid when readers get worked up over Zoey having multiple partners because she’s too young to settle into a long-term commitment. So why the hell is she forming permanent soul bonds and making life-long promises to Stark?

Zoey’s only contribution to the actual plot is to lead a funeral rite. Which she immediately screws up by calling Jack by the wrong name, something that no one ever points out or corrects. This means that not only did P.C. Cast forget and not double-check Jack’s name, but Kristin didn’t pick up on this error, and neither did their official editor. Not one single person in this entire process realized Zoey was saying the wrong name, even though Jack was explicitly named after a character from Brokeback Mountain and his name should have been very easy to remember.

Well, Zoey did sort of have one other contribution to this plot. She used her new title as queen! And it was infuriating! See, because Zoey is queen, she’s able to supersede the need for High Council approval to open a new House of Night, allowing her and her friends to go start a new HoN in the tunnels away from Neferet. But they don’t actually start a HoN because they don’t have any classes and just… declare that they’re going to be bussed to and from the tunnels every night. So, essentially, Zoey uses her new title of queen to force Neferet to let her set up her own private dorm just for her and her friends.

Also, Zoey got a seer stone from Sgiach and does absolutely nothing with it during this book, even though it maybe would have actually been helpful for revealing the Darkness around Neferet. But I don’t actually know for sure, because its not especially clear what a seer stone does or what Old Magick actually is.

Stevie Rae In Burned, Stevie Rae spent much of the book being stressed and confused about her secret sort-of-romance with Rephaim, while also nominally acting as a stand-in High Priestess in Zoey’s absence and only just barely doing anything about the murderous rogue fledglings.

In this book, Stevie Rae… spends most of her time being stressed and confused about her secret sort-of-romance with Rephaim, while also nominally acting as a stand-in High Priestess in Zoey’s absence and being weirdly resistant to all attempts to actually get Zoey to return to Tulsa.

The worst part about her role in these two books being basically the exact same is that it really shouldn’t be. At the end of Burned, Stevie Rae and Rephaim parted ways because Kalona’s soul had returned to his body and Rephaim made it clear that he wouldn’t be able to stand against his father. There’s some discussion of this at the beginning of the book, with them being upset about being apart for an indeterminate period of time (the length of the timeskip is really unclear). It’s resolved pretty quickly and anticlimactically, though. Jack dies, Rephaim shows up, Stevie Rae sees him and there’s a tense moment. Then Stevie Rae calls him to her because she wants him to tell her what he knows about what happened to Jack – and, of course, they immediately return to the way they were before.

But this is also exactly what happened in the previous book! Stevie Rae was all determined that she was going to get information from Rephaim no matter what, that she would fight him if she had to regardless of their Imprint, and then… she didn’t. And the exact same thing happened in this book. This isn’t a parallel. This isn’t a callback. It’s just the author dragging out and regurgitating the same plotline.

Rephaim is such a defining part of Stevie Rae’s story that it even takes over her conversation with her mom. Stevie Rae hasn’t seen or spoken to her mom in about two months, and up until this scene Stevie Rae’s mom believed her daughter was dead. But this scene barely focuses on that. Instead, they sit and talk about Rephaim, what he means to Stevie Rae, what she needs to do about the secrets she’s keeping and the lies she’s been telling her friends.

That’s not good storytelling. That’s not building strong, complex female characters. Stevie Rae’s entire plotline is about Rephaim – and it has been since she got her own arc. From the very first chapter we got from Stevie Rae’s perspective, Rephaim became the central focus.

There’s some lip-service paid to her being uncertain in her role as High Priestess, but literally that’s it. It’s brought up once during a confrontation with Neferet and promptly forgotten. This should be a much bigger focus in Stevie Rae’s story. Being a High Priestess, especially a High Priestess of a whole new type of vampyre, is a huge responsibility and has enormous implications for her future. Figuring out what it means to be a High Priestess, what kind of leader she wants to be, what she wants red fledglings and vampyres’ place in broader society to look like – these should be the things that define Stevie Rae’s journey. Her love life should be a subplot, and it should underscore and entwine with the stress and confusion of trying to lead this new society into an uncertain future.

But that’s not what we get. Rephaim is the focus and everything else is background decoration.

Also, for some reason Stevie Rae can’t manage to use her affinity for anything tangible and instead just summons green glows around herself that vanish the instant she loses concentration. Because she is smart and powerful!

The Twins Continue to exist less and less in this series. We enjoyed 159 pages without either of them having a single line of dialogue.

Damien and Jack Jack finally gets a role in the plot! But not, like, a character arc or place in the story that involves any sort of agency. No, Jack gets to be colossally stupid and conveniently isolated so that Neferet can show up and murder him while making it look like an accident. This is because he is pure. Again, this has nothing to do with his choices or his actions or anything involving his agency. Neferet determines that he is pure and wholly untainted by Darkness, and that’s what she needs for a sacrifice.

This is only made worse by how Jack responds to being killed. It’s right before lunch time on campus. He could easily scream and yell and call for help. He could try to use his affinity that was discovered in Tempted and was promptly never explored! For all we know, an affinity for technology means he has technopathy. But no. Instead, Jack sings himself out with a song that the author clearly chose to match his death scene and not because it made any sense for the Celebration Ritual he was supposed to be preparing for.

And then, once he’s dead? He’s not allowed to be angry! He’s not allowed to grieve the life he lost and the people he left behind! Nope. Instead, he’s eternally happy and joyful with Nyx. Because he’s so pure, you guys! Isn’t it great that he’s pure? Isn’t it fine that he died if he’s happy?

This is the most infuriating and needless death scene in the series thus far.

All of this also means that Damien gets to feature more prominently compared to other recent installations in the series. He, however, doesn’t really do anything. He just mourns. Which makes sense – his boyfriend just died – but the way other characters respond to it is really telling. First, everyone acts like Jack was Damien’s life partner and this death is comparable to Dragon’s loss of Anastasia. But Damien and Jack have been dating for about two months. That’s it. And yet, at the same time, everyone is panicked that Damien has been crying for hours and can’t sleep and isn’t getting better. This book ends maybe a full day after Jack’s death. Damien has every reason to still be deeply in mourning! It makes absolutely no sense for his friends to already be telling him he needs to move on!

Otherwise, Jack and Damien really don’t have much role in this book other than to be the butt of Aphrodite’s frequent homophobic jokes, as well as a few homophobic comments from Kramisha.

Stark Stark’s role in this series is similar to Zoey’s. They hide out on the Isle of Skye for a while. They have sex. That’s mostly it.

I mean, I guess he has a couple other things going on. Kalona has started entering into the sliver of soul he gave him and taking control, but not much comes of it other than some extremely uncomfortable scenes that ultimately have no long-term impact on this book. It’s setup for the next book, I guess, but it involves no agency on Stark’s part. That’s Kalona’s subplot, not his.

Stark’s actual point of growth in this book is about embracing his affinity and taking up his bow again instead of letting fear of his Dark side and past mistakes rule him. It’s a nice bit of growth, in theory, but in practice it makes absolutely no sense. Stark has never really refused his affinity. Even when he was first introduced and firmly stated to Neferet that he no longer practices archery, he was practicing against targets pretty soon after. In Tempted, after he broke free of Darkness and swore himself to Zoey in Hunted, Stark continued using his bow without hesitation to protect Zoey. The only reason he didn’t use it in Burned is because he wasn’t in a combat situation until he reached the Otherworld, at which point he was forced to use a Guardian claymore. So… Stark only refused to use his bow in this book, and that could only have lasted a day because he was resting in bed the whole time before this.

Kalona In this book, Kalona was dealing with the ramifications of failing to kill Zoey in the Otherworld and thus becoming Neferet’s slave, basically, because of the Oath he swore to her. His goal now is to escape from her dominion. This is emphasized a lot – and it turns out to all be entirely pointless, because he was never actually under her dominion in the first place. By giving a piece of his soul to Stark when he was in the Otherworld, he negated the terms of the Oath.

But we still have to read through all the idiocy and creepiness before this is revealed.

First, the narrative puts in a lot of effort trying to make us feel bad for Kalona and his position under Neferet’s control. Neferet is described with very creepy, predatory, and sex shaming language. Kalona expresses disgust at the thought of her touching him. Clearly, we’re supposed to regard him as a victim here.

But… Look, I know I keep bringing this up, but it’s so important. Kalona is a serial rapist! You can’t brush over that. You can’t take a serial rapist and make me feel sympathetic to them because they feel violated by the person they basically promised their soul to if they failed in a mission.

I mean, there’s a way this could have been handled to actually work toward Kalona’s redemption, but the author is so clueless about writing proper redemption arcs. Kalona’s situation could have been a moment of realization for him. He could have had an epiphany – he could have realized that the way he feels about Neferet’s treatment of him is probably akin to how his victims felt when he first came to Earth. This could have been a moment of him humanizing his victims and feeling remorse for the atrocities he committed against them.

But no. Instead, the authors make it even harder to sympathize with him by having him fantasize about how, when he frees himself of Neferet’s control, he’s going to enslave her.

Then we get into the discovery that he can enter and control Stark through the sliver of soul he gave him. And it’s creepy – but, like, the scene from his perspective is written in such a way that it seems like it’s supposed to be… sympathetic? There’s so much emphasis on how shocked and overjoyed he is to find himself in bed with Zoey, and the language and framing of the scene doesn’t present it as creepy or predatory – not compared to how overtly the language around Neferet’s behaviour shows her as predatory. It’s extremely uncomfortable, specifically because it’s clear that it isn’t supposed to be uncomfortable.

Anyway, Kalona figures out he isn’t actually under Neferet’s control and he and Rephaim decide to test this theory by actively disobeying her during the funeral rite at the House of Night. This is a big part of the climax, and Kalona explicitly kills multiple Sons of Erebus Warriors. It remains to be seen if this will be addressed in any future books. More importantly, Kalona agrees to let Rephaim be free, which is meant to be a huge move toward his redemption. There’s even a WHITE FEATHER!!1! But as far as narrative and his actual character arc goes… This isn’t a redemption moment. Kalona’s villainy was never connected to who he is as a father – it’s about the atrocities he committed against the Cherokee, especially Cherokee women. It isn’t not good that he let Rephaim be free, and he wasn’t a great father, but this shouldn’t be a core moment in his redemption. Being controlled by Neferet (or at least believing he was controlled by her) would have made way more sense to this end.

Aphrodite Aphrodite didn’t really do anything in this book. She made a bunch of homophobic jokes at Jack and Damien’s expense, and she was portrayed as mean and unfair for calling out Zoey for avoiding her responsibilities. She’s also the one who pushes for Zoey to be told about Jack’s death ASAP so she can get back to Tulsa and help them deal with Neferet.

Otherwise? Aphrodite just spends the book being abrasive and unpleasant. Its kind of disappointing, considering she used to be a character with actual agency.

Neferet Neferet’s nefarious plan this book is to do… something. It was explained and it kind of made sense, but I’m just getting so tired of everything being so convoluted and inconsistent. Why does she still care about Zoey? Why doesn’t she just carry on, working the High Council until they give her the position she wants, and then seizing control of vampyre society to start the war she’s always wanted? It’s not like Zoey is an active threat, particularly not at the beginning of this book. I mean, Zoey was in hiding for weeks. Neferet could have done plenty in that time and no one would have been there to stop her.

Even if Neferet feels it’s more important to get Zoey out the way first instead of pursuing her earlier plans, why doesn’t she just… do that? Neferet has used Darkness to kill before without the crime being connected back to her. She does it in this book. She could have done it against Zoey and framed someone else for it. Hell, she could have killed Zoey, framed Stevie Rae for it, and then gotten her war started with the red fledglings just like she and Kalona discussed. Point is, it doesn’t make sense that her plan is so convoluted and involves doing so much but so little at the same time.

It makes even less sense when you get to the end of the book. She’s spent weeks doing nothing, patiently biding her time, playing a careful chess match to get Zoey in the right place so Neferet can trick her into allowing her to reclaim her position of power at the House of Night. But then we get to the end of the book and the white bull offers her a Vessel in exchange for the right sacrifice, and suddenly Neferet is impatient and impulsive. She knows Grandma Redbird is the perfect sacrifice and that Linda is extremely flawed, but she chooses to use Linda to create her Vessel instead of waiting a few hours for Grandma. It makes no sense. She’s sabotaging herself and she knows it. WHY?

Her characterization is also all over the place and deeply stigmatizing of mental illness, so that’s fun.

Nyx

Why didn’t she tell everyone at the funeral that Neferet was responsible for Jack’s death and had allied herself with Darkness? Or at the very least confirm for everyone that Neferet has turned from her path and is no longer listening to the goddess?

Jack feels that he needs to be out by that tree preparing for the Celebration Ritual even though it’s been postponed, the implication being that his intuition (Nyx) is telling him something important is going to happen. The important thing that happens is his murder. Why would Nyx insist that he has to stay right where he is so he can go ahead and die?! Why wouldn’t she send him a gut feeling to warn him to leave?

Why did Nyx appear to Rephaim as a ghost and sway his decisions so directly? She refuses to intervene in this way with anyone else because of her thing with free will.

What the hell was the deal with Rephaim’s punishment? Nyx knows that Rephaim has murdered and raped and committed horrible atrocities for centuries. She knows that he has a romantic relationship with Stevie Rae, who is nocturnal and dies in sunlight. So why is her idea of punishment to turn him into a raven during the day and allow him to be fully human at night? That barely affects him! The only time he spends as a raven is time he would be asleep anyway.

[likeshipsonthesea]

Sensory prompts: 25 or 55? (or both!) For whatever ship moves you.

thank you for the prompt!! from this list if anyone else wants to send some in. i am in such a frogs-post-college kind of mood so i’m gonna go with 55. Finding old photographs you’d forgotten about and it’s not a ship in particular but a dex-centric poly-frogs-friendship with like a hint of nurseydex kind of thing… enjoy

(after-note: this got.. yeah. warning for homophobia)

(also there is stuff in here that’s my hc for dex and his town, so for reference, this ficlet-y thing is my understanding of dex’s life growing up)

“I don’t even know how you fit all this stuff in your room, dude,” Nursey says, carrying yet another box down the stairs. “It’s, like, a clown car kinda situation up there.”

Dex raises an eyebrow at Nursey, vaguely conscious that he could make a crack about how Nursey’s never had to optimize space before, or that not everyone has walk-in closets like he does. Instead, Dex takes the box from Nursey and says nothing, carrying it into the living room where the rest of his things have already been sorted.

Nursey is right about the number of boxes– they must have gone through about twenty of them by now. They’ve developed an efficient if dragging process of opening a box, cataloging its contents, and sorting them into one of several categories. Dex knows that it would likely be going quicker if it wasn’t for Nursey and Chowder pausing over every peewee hockey trophy and aced spelling test to coo and chirp and generally make Dex blush from head to toe.

Still, Dex thinks as he watches Nursey and Chowder return to their spots on the carpet, jostling each other as they fake-fight over who gets the bigger box, Dex is glad they came. He almost didn’t let them, almost didn’t even tell them he was going back to Maine after graduation to get the rest of his things. Mostly for the same reasons that he’d been dreading the trip himself, but since Chowder and Nursey’d arrived, his parents had mostly steered clear of them, for which the guilty gratefulness and painful ache mixed oddly in Dex’s chest.

“Hey P-Doodle.” Dex blinks. Nursey is grinning at him. “Just gonna stand there and watch or what, slacker?”

Dex scoffs, shaking his head, and plops down next to him on the floor. “You’re calling me a slacker? Me? The second place champion of the 2003 Little Harbor Spelling Bee? I don’t think so.”

Nursey laughs, bright, and listening to the sound bounce around the walls of Dex’s childhood home helps to soothe the ache in Dex’s chest.

“How’d you get second place?” Chowder asks, cutting into the next box with the box-cutter Dex gave a very detailed tutorial on prior to beginning their work.

“Got the i’s and e’s mixed up in ‘believe’.” Dex pulls the other box closer to himself. “Rachel Taylor won with ‘everyone.’“

“Well, ‘everyone’ is obvious,” Chowder says, in that wide-eyed way he has where you can’t quite tell if he’s being sarcastic or sincere. “It’s just two smaller words pushed together.”

Dex squints, suspicious, before taking it as honest and saying, “Thanks, C.”

Chowder’s mouth stretches into a smirk, giving his sarcasm away, and Nursey laughs again as Dex loudly complains that it totally wasn’t fair and that’s when Chowder pulls out the stack of photos.

Dex pauses mid-rant to frown at the top photo in the stack, held together by a cracking pink rubber band. It’s him, he knows that much, and he’s probably about eight, maybe older as he was always small for his age, but he can’t remember ever seeing it before.

“Aw,” Chowder coos, tugging off the elastic. “When is this from?” Dex holds his hand out and Chowder passes over the first photo. Young Dex is on the beach, as they were a lot, being so close to the water. He’s wearing a pair of blue swim shorts that used to be his brother’s, so they’re a little big on him, and he’s staring grumpily back at the camera with a hand fisted in the waistband to keep them from falling. There’s sunscreen smeared on his nose and the beginnings of a sunburn on his shoulders.

“Wow, you were grumpy from the start, huh?” Nursey peers over Dex’s shoulder. Dex can see his smile out of the corner of his eye. “Can I?” He reaches out to take the photo and Dex hands it over, exchanging it for a couple more from Chowder.

They seem to be from the same time, probably all from the same reel of film. The next one is once again at the beach, but Jay– Dex’s brother– is next to him, his arm begrudgingly around Dex’s shoulders. The one after that, they’re both in the water, Dex trailing after Jay and his friends as they roughhouse in the water. The last one at the beach is of Dex, again, building a sandcastle with a brown-haired boy who’s only visible in profile.

“Whose that?” Chowder asks, leaning close, and Dex feels suddenly as if there isn’t enough air.

“Peter,” he says, suddenly remembering that summer. He wasn’t 8, he was 9, and he and Peter fell into each other’s space when they got paired off at Dex’s uncle’s sailing “camp.” They spent long days in the same boat, making up jokes no one else understood and diving into the water whenever Dex’s uncle looked away to splash each other until their laughing mouths tasted of nothing but salt.

“Did anyone in your town not have a biblical name?” Nursey says, snorting, as he takes the photos from Dex to shuffle through. Dex huffs something that might be a laugh back, thinking of Peter and then Luke and–

“He looks nice,” Chowder says, charitably, and looks back at the photos in his hand. Dex nods, dully, at that. Yeah, Peter was nice. He was Dex’s best friend all summer, the two of them inseparable in that adult-eye-rolling kind of way, the “look at how quickly children bond, it’s so sweet, so naive” kind of way, and remembering it now has Dex’s mouth flooding with bitterness.

“Is this your first day of school?” Chowder asks, onto the next photo. He hands it over and it’s Dex, in a smart blue polo that was one of his only non-hand-me-downs. He’s grinning at the camera, thumbs hooked under his backpack straps. He’s still tan from the summer, freckles attacking every inch of bare skin. It was taken on the front porch, almost identical to every other first-day-of-school photo Ma took of him from kindergarten to senior year of high school.

“Fifth grade,” Dex says, in answer. He and Peter were, somewhat coincidentally, in the same fifth grade class. The teacher had to separate them two weeks in because they’d giggle together all class long. At recess they would escape to the outskirts of the playground, make up games where they were pirates away at sea or adventurers exploring the deepest caves on Earth. 

After school, they would do homework at each other’s houses, usually Dex’s because Jay was home to watch them. For months the only times they weren’t in each others’ pockets was while they slept, and even then, there were sleepovers when they’d wake up tangled beneath blankets in a shared bed, having stayed up late whispering secrets across the pillows.

“Your birthday!” Nursey reaches across Dex for the photo in Chowder’s hand. “You were ten? Damn you were tiny. The cake is bigger than you are.”

“My uncle went overboard,” Dex says. “Ma freaked about the blue icing. It got everywhere.” Sure enough, the next photo is a grinning Dex with blue smeared all over his mouth. In the background, hovering, is Peter with the same decoration.

Dex remembers what happened after, remembers Peter dragging Dex to the dark, empty backyard to solemnly hand over a present, remembers unwrapping the gift, awkward as Peter’d wrapped it himself and there was too much tape involved, remembers the strange fluttering in his chest when he unveiled the beach-themed dollar-store key chain, the words Best Summer Ever! stretching above a photograph of Dex and Peter with their faces squished so close their grins were distorted.

Dex remembers the fluttery feeling being too much for his small chest to handle, remembers telling Peter thank you, remembers the strange need to tell Peter how pretty he looked in the hazy light of the fading moon. “You’re pretty,” he’d said, remembers distinctly how the words had felt on his tongue, and Peter’s solemn expression curdled, disgusted, and Dex had ruined it, he’d broken, he was broken–

“I have to– I’ll be right back,” Dex says, pushing away the pictures, and Nursey and Chowder pause in their perusal to send him heavy glances but it doesn’t keep him from escaping to the kitchen.

He pours himself a glass of water without paying much attention, muscle-memory even after he hasn’t lived here consistently in four years, and it makes him wonder if moving his things out of this home, moving out of Maine, will really change anything. He is from here, from this house and this town, he was born of the expectations and the assumptions and the need to be silent.

Four years at Samwell and he still came home to the itchy, unfitting hand-me-down of the person his parents want, need, him to be. He’s still quiet, frictionless, unquestioning, when he’s here. Has he really changed when it only takes the confines of his childhood home to undo all of it?

As he shakes under the memory of the weeks following his tenth birthday– the whispers hovering, murky, around his head, the stark emptiness next to him where Peter used to stand, the pervading loneliness of being wrong– he doesn’t notice Nursey and Chowder entering the kitchen until they’re standing in front of him.

“Dex?” Chowder frowns, hovering at the edge of Dex’s space. Nursey breaches it without hesitation, curling a heavy hand around Dex’s shoulder. “What’s– what’s wrong?”

Dex shakes his head, though he doesn’t know if they can tell when his whole body feels like its shaking apart anyway. “I– nothing, I–”

“Dex.”

It’s– it’s firm, and Nursey hardly ever says Dex’s actual name– it’s grounding, the reminder, that he is not Will, he is Dex, Samwell’s Dex. He is the boy who stepped into a kitchen and allowed himself to feel at home there, he is the boy who cared for his friends when they needed and, sometimes, allowed them to care for him, too. He is the boy who learned that the only broken part of him was the chafing of trying to fit himself into something he was not. He was not.

Dex shallows, thick, and nods. “Yeah, yeah. Sorry. I– memories.”

They could ask, and Dex consciously takes that risk when he explains even the little bit he does. And though Chowder’s eyebrows wrinkle and his lips part, halfway to a question, Nursey stares, unflinching, for maybe two seconds before he nods, resolute.

“Why don’t we take a break?” Nursey asks, and maybe it would’ve sounded patronizing, or pitying, or any number of grating adjectives, if they’d been the people they were their frog year, or even their junior year. But knowing Nursey as Dex does now, knowing the expectations and assumptions and silence that Nursey grew from, it makes it easy, almost, for Dex to nod back.

“Yeah,” he says, repetitive, dizzy. “Yeah.”

“Let’s go check out that ice cream stand,” Chowder suggests, catching up quickly. “You said it’s Harry Potter themed?”

Chowder’s question gets Dex talking, as it was meant to, about the ice cream stand a few streets over. The stand, Dex explains as they walk there, gives a free extra scoop in exchange for a quote from the books or movies. It’s been around all Dex’s life and it was half the reason he read the books on his own before his reading ability had truly reached that level.

At the stand, they all order their treats and recite their quotes, and Dex remembers when he came here as a kid, friends and family typically with him, Peter with him, once or twice, and the memory doesn’t ache the way he’s come to think memories have to.

Dex sits at a picnic table across from Nursey and Chowder as they debate which of the books is the best, the Maine summer sun blistering and familiar, ice cream dripping and sweet, and he feels that odd dissonance of experiencing a forgotten photograph, the memory hazy and the picture stark. The permeating sense of home Dex feels in this moment overlays the hazy memory of disconnection, mingling until the burst of emotion in his chest is melancholic but hopeful.

He smiles, swiping his tongue over his ice cream cone, and allows himself to enjoy it, for now, without question.

[tiredschutta-blog]

How to evaluate a dish & make a food review (In-depth Guide)

The way to write a food evaluate

explore this article

writing your evaluate

getting the right details

consuming like a food critic

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article precis

the job of a food reviewer is to as it should be deliver the taste, texture, smell, and presentation of a eating place's food. You not most effective touch upon the meals however also on the surroundings, group of workers knowledge and attentiveness, the velocity of service, the general influence of the restaurant or cafe. A great food review puts the reader at your desk with you, allowing them to determine whether or not or no longer they need to visit the eating place when they're executed reading. Technique

1. writing your evaluate

image titled write a meals evaluation step thirteen

1. do a little background studies. Once you've had your meal and brought your notes, take a touch time to peer what the restaurant's records is. These type of info are a great manner to add a few shade for your review. For instance, you might find that the pinnacle chef skilled in france or used to work at any other nicely-cherished eating place inside the area, and you can use those connections to make humans inquisitive about the food. Start through analyzing the eating place's internet site. Look up the proprietor and executive chef to get an idea in their schooling, fashion, and past ventures. Photograph titled write a food evaluation

step 14

2. open your evaluation with a compelling hook. The primary sentence of the review have to make human beings want to examine more. Keep in mind, you are giving them a cause to both spend their money at this restaurant or pass beforehand to every other spot, however you're additionally seeking to get them to study your writing. Some hints for an awesome hook encompass:

promise a tale or surprise, which includes "it may have taken some time to get to my mouth, but i've determined the great paella on the planet." make certain, however, that you deliver at the promise later! Give an interesting, tangential reality, like "chef zurlo most effective started cooking 2 years in the past, yet she's quick risen thru the ranks to perform oakland's satisfactory new bagel keep."

describe a mainly charming or compelling a part of the environment, precise or terrible, like a excellent view or a funny smell from the kitchen. Image titled write a meals assessment 

step 15

describe 3-five dishes that you sampled, now not all of them. No one wants to read a laundry listing of ingredients, so choose the meals that made the best influence on you (properly or awful) and recognition your writing on these dishes. Don't just say if they were good or terrible. Strive to give details and motives, naming every unique dish. As an define, you have to attempt to speak about the subsequent three things in every food overview:

presentation: how'd the dish look while it arrived, and the way did it make you experience? Excited? Hungry? Like royalty? Like you have been to your own family's kitchen once more? Flavor: the large, obvious one, but this is simplest because it's so essential. Use descriptive language, metaphor, and simile to position your reader in your shoes, or mouth. Name spices or flavors when you may. Texture:this normally consists of cooking process as well. Did it melt to your mouth? Turned into it nevertheless hot when it arrived? Changed into it juicy and smooth or hard and brittle? Had been their a couple of textures (including something gentle with a crunchy crust), and did they work well together? Photograph titled write a food review step sixteen

four

use huge, colourful adjectives while writing. Take into account that, exceptionally, you're promoting the enjoy here, no longer just the meals. Sense loose to get poetic with your writing in locations, the use of 1-2 nicely-positioned adjectives to permit the reader recognize exactly what they have to anticipate on the eating place. You could think of it, in a few approaches, as the fast tale of your ride -- deliver information and colourful additions that make the restaurant stand out and experience particular. This includes the ecosystem, the floor, and the region. The greater unique information, the better. Strive for one true detail about each interaction/a part of the restaurant. Photo titled write a food review

step 17

consider a eating place's intentions, now not just your personal preferences. An awesome food evaluate is set helping different human beings locate the eating place, now not just a platform to tell everyone your likes and dislikes. For example, if you go to a eating place with retro art at the partitions and rollerskating dancers, it isn't always honest to decide the eating place for that specialize in burgers and fries as opposed to oysters. A terrific reviewer is as independent as viable, evaluating the restaurant as a whole. What kind of ecosystem are they going for here? Do they pull it off? How do your preferences match the eating places? If you hate seafood, but that is the eating place's strong point, you can want to tone down the terrible evaluations of the salmon or tell your readers that you are not typically a fan of fish.

Step 6

write a combination of execs and cons. Until it is either the very pleasant restaurant you have ever eaten at or the very worst, it is not truthful to write down a overview this is both all proper or all bad. Try to supply your target market the complete picture. This in the end lets in the reader to make their own decision based totally for your advice, which seems tons greater reasonable whilst it considers each the pros and cons.

"even as my servers have been fairly kind and accommodating, it doesn't trade the fact that the food turned into a chunk bloodless whilst it came out."

"head chef mathew tucci has designed an exceptional menu, and it is a shame that he simplest has 10 tables to serve to in his small little restaurant."

image titled write a meals evaluation

step 19

make a recommendation. Ultimately, human beings want your advice on the meals. What to order, what to pass, and what eating places to go to depending on their temper. You need to experience free to indicate certain dishes, recommending that a person need to bypass dessert, or mention if it looks as if a fantastic region to take a date. Those make your review compelling and useful. If there may be little of advantage within the restaurant and also you firmly agree with is ought to be avoided, sense unfastened to write a negative evaluate. However, you need to normally strive a eating place a 2d time, making sure that you failed to strive out a fluke of a dish, before attacking it.[3]

fill inside the crucial information of the eating place inside the beginning or cease of the evaluation. This is in which you placed in the common value of a meal, the reservations time, and the cope with. You may also add a score, such three out of 4 stars, if you wanted. Many reviewers positioned this on the very quit of the object, in it's very own separate paragraph, but a few additionally put it at the top, on a separate column on the aspect, or labored into one of the first paragraphs. Approach

Getting the right info

avoid telling workforce participants which you are a meals critic or reviewer. You need to get the identical enjoy as another consumer, as many eating places will give you special remedy which can exchange your evaluate in the event that they understand you are a critic. Instead of telling them you are there to check their meals, absolutely head internal and take a desk, acting like every other purchaser. The association of meals journalists even advise which you keep away from big culinary occasions (grand openings, group of workers parties, and so forth.) so you do not threat being approached with the aid of cooks seeking out a terrific evaluate. If you are an established reviewer you should make reservations below a extraordinary call. You ought to nonetheless convey a notebook or small recorder with you to take notes, although you could also take them in your telephone. To write a super review, you must be taking notes. 

Image titled write a food evaluate step 2

make a few notes of the restaurant's logistics. Did you need a reservation, and the way some distance earlier become it installation? Where is the restaurant, and what's the neighborhood like? How turned into the parking? These facts will make up a totally small a part of your evaluate, however this data is critical to help capability clients discover the proper restaurant for his or her night time.[4]

image titled write a meals evaluation

describe the ecosystem and environment whilst you walked in. Deliver your reader a feel for your enjoy. Does the wait team of workers treat you like family or an antique buddy, or is the place fashionable and trendy? What is the dress code like? What sort of atmosphere is inside the eating place? Be innovative within the description -- an amazing food evaluate isn't pretty much the menu, it's miles about the complete revel in. Do the decorations create an attractive atmosphere? How are human beings playing their food? At massive, talkative tables or many small, intimate dates? Picture titled write a food evaluate

step 4

make some notes at the carrier. Keep away from element like, "the provider turned into right/awful." you want specifics. The first-class manner to get them is by asking questions. While you do not need to pester human beings, a terrific waitstaff will recognize what ingredients cross nicely together, if there are any allergens within the dish, and the basic presentation of the dish. Most importantly, an excellent waitstaff is there when you want it -- whilst water glasses get low, whilst a fork is dropped, and while you're prepared to order your next course. Picture titled write a food evaluation

step five

order from a extensive swath of the menu. You will not be able to devour the entirety at the menu. You need to, however, contact as many sections of it as you could. Make sure to get a drink, an appetizer, a first-rate path, and a dessert to get a experience of the kitchen's complete abilities. If you can, include a set of people and have all of us order some thing exclusive (pork/fish, the soup/salad, sauteed/simmered) to get an awesome idea how the kitchen handles the whole restaurant. As a food reviewer, you want to try everything you can to get an excellent concept of the eating place. What you order is, of course, a depend of private desire. However, asking the servers for suggestions is a first rate way to peer what the kitchen and group of workers are proudest off. Maximum servers have tasted everything on the menu with the chef's steering, in order that they have to be able to help you order and decide what you're ingesting. Approach

eating like a food critic

picture titled write a meals overview step 6

word the presentation of the dish. As soon because the food reaches your desk, make a few notes on the arrival. Is it easy and beautiful or messy and tired? Consider, a meals evaluation is about the enjoy, no longer just the flavor, so you want to seize all of those info. If you are at a restaurant that lets in it, try and snap a brief picture with your cellphone. This can make it a great deal simpler to write about the appearance later. Picture titled write a meals review step 7

experience your first few bites. Appreciate the primary few bites, sampling everything at the plate earlier than writing anything else down. Consume slowly and experience the meal before seeking to get too crucial. Make certain you devour the dish the way it become meant first-- do not select out any substances or strive things separately till later. Picture titled write a food assessment step 8

write down your initial impressions with precise element. Use adjectives and clear language when making your notes. "i favored the usage of rosemary" isn't as useful as "the rosemary crust became mild and natural and best complemented the smooth, fluffy potatoes." that said, this is just the time to take notes, so don't worry about getting the language ideal. Writing down precise info now about why you favored/disliked a dish will make your writing lots, tons simpler later. Image titled write a meals overview step nine

sample the individual elements of the meal. That is wherein you begin to get into the specifics of a very good food evaluate. Strive every part of the meal one by one, checking for the following standards:

texture. How does the food experience to your mouth? Again, be precise, as there's a ramification of textures, all of which can be desirable or awful. Spices: are the spices consistent at some stage in the meal? Are you able to inform what some of the spices are? Complexity: a difficult one to explain, complexity is a degree of the sort of flavors in a meals. A good prepare dinner doesn't simply cross for "lemon-flavored" or "garlic & pepper," they move for a nuanced, precise taste to their food. Do the individual elements of the dish come together to make something new or higher than the sum of their elements? Photograph titled write a food overview step 10

five

sample the whole thing at the table. In case you're with other humans, ensure you taste their dishes as properly and make more than one quick notes. This is the first-class manner to get a full concept of the menu and the eating places strengths and weaknesses. Make certain to jot down down the precise call of each dish for later reference. Your reader will need to understand what to order or keep away from. Photograph titled write a meals overview step eleven

make precise notes as you devour. A good evaluate is rooted in fact, so ensure you're armed with information. Of direction, all meals reviewing is inherently subjective, however that does not suggest must only touch upon what you preferred and didn't like. It is probably simplest to make your notes after you end the route or as you eat, relying to your company. Both way, you need to now not depend upon your reminiscence to remember the whole thing -- proper food critics write notes.

ask questions as they arise. In case you're curious what become in a sauce, how something turned into prepared, or where sure high-profile meals (meats, high priced cheeses, and many others.) came from, experience unfastened to invite. At high-class restaurants the waitstaff is skilled to understand about the food they serve, so that they have to be satisfied to offer you an answer.[6]

[dungeoneering102]

D&D Quest Idea: Nightmare Before Christmas

One of my followers, @chiefswampballs, wanted to find out if there’s a way to run an adventure themed around Nightmare Before Christmas, an animated film by Tim Burton. So I decided to look into it. First: let’s look at the interesting elements of Nightmare Before Christmas.

Interesting Elements

The movie is filled with very cool elements that make the audience excited to watch the movie. To have a game with a similar setting would require one to use these or similar elements, to generate the same feeling. Here are what elements I found that make NBC interesting:

Monster Design. Every monster is very unique and fun to look at.

Settings. NBC hints at multiple worlds, each based on a separate celebration. This very hint gets people’s imaginations going. What does the Easter land look like? Is there a St. Patrick’s land where everyone is drunk? A land dedicated to July 4th? Oktoberfest? Chinese New Year? So many possible setting to explore.

The Music. One thing anyone remembers from this movie are the songs and the tunes. They are just so damn catchy.

The Charming Characters. Jack and Sally are all very fun characters. We root for them all the way through. Even Oogie Boogie, the film’s antagonist, is very fun to watch and listen to.

Some Pitfalls:

When running games BASED on other stories a DM can often fall into pitfalls, namely the non PC Protagonist pitfall. This is when the PCs end up being observers to the main characters of the source material, who are the real heroes of the story. With NBC, a DM might want to show off how great of a character Jack is, but end up having Jack do all the cool stuff (defeating Oogie Boogie, for example) and leave the PCs just wondering around observing. Avoid this mistake. Do not prioritize the NPCs over the PCs. Keep as much of the cool stuff for the PCs as possible.

Game Idea: The Skeleton Who Stole Christmas

Background:

The Party starts in a town of your choice. Simple, medieval town. It’s wintertime and it is the day before Wintercrest. Now I am using Wintercrest as a stand in for Christmas (since my D&D world doesn’t have a Christ). You can have your own name for it. Whatever it is, it has to have these traits:

It is a holiday set during winter.

People get each other gifts during this Holiday.

Santa Claus (or some kind of stand-in for him) travels door to door delivering presents to the Children (ages 16 and below) on the night of this celebration.

The rest of the details you can work out. Now your Party is staying in this town that is celebration their version of Christmas, and they get to witness the preparations for the Christmas Eve. Let your Party participate as well, if they want. Come up with some games (more on that later). Whatever it is, set up the celebration that will happen the next day. Here is where it gets good.

The Party wakes up early morning to the sound of countless screaming children. Their toys are horrific items, small monsters, little quasits, body parts, whatever have you. And there is the hook:

Santa brought demonic gifts to the children. Travel to Santa’s home and make him pay for this mischief.

Now the town Mayor or local King puts up a job posting saying something like

Any brave warrior willing to travel to the frozen wastes of North Pole and punish the mischievous spirit that betrayed our trust on this, most Holy of nights, will be rewarded 20,000 gp. Seek Archmage Duvalt in the court of his majesty.

Keep in mind, all the names, the reward, everything can be tailored to fit your style. Since the Party already has some reputation from being adventurers (start them at level 4-5), the townsfolk quickly go to them asking for them to take up the job. Through peer pressure, the Party agrees to take up the job. Now here’s how the plot will vaguely go:

Party goes to King, accepting the job.

King’s archmage plane shifts them to the Christmas Land.

The Party travels through a sad and gloomy Christmas town, full of unhappy elves, only to come up to Santa’s workshop, and discover that Santa has been kidnapped.

Throw in some clues for the Party here. After investigating the clues the Party figures out that someone from Halloween land was here.

Party goes to Halloween land to find its King, Jack the Skeleton.

Party has to fight through a dungeon of monsters and beasts to get to Jack.

Once they get there they see King Jack, his queen Sally, and his advisor, Oogie Boogie.

Party demands for Santa to be freed, but Jack, thinking they’re just there to ruin his fun has none of it.

Fight with Jack commences. Some 4-5 rounds in, Jack gets stabbed in the back by Oogie Boogie.

Boogie reveals that this was a plan he hatched, tricking jack to give the wrong kind of presents, to get the humans to dethrone Jack so he can get the throne of Halloween Land.

Boogie Man then offers monetary reward to the Party if they finish off Jack and give him the throne.

The Party then decides who to side with, fights the appropriate character. Whoever wins, they agree to hand over Santa, who returns to his home.

If Party sides with Jack, Santa blesses them for their kindness and gives them gifts (magic items). Otherwise, he gets upset with them and leaves them gift-less.

QUESTIONS

What if the Players Don’t Accept the Job?

If you’re not sure weather your PCs will accept the job or not, here are some options:

Tell them, before the game, to accept the job when its given. Most of your players (unless they’re horrible people), will go with it.

Just narrate the intro. Don’t give them the choice of declining. Players like this less, but it speeds up the process.

Have the local king/lord/mayor hear that there’s a band of adventurers in town, and physically come down offering the job. If your Party did something shady in the past, the king can blackmail them with that. Or he can be super nice, and double the reward money.

What Clues should I leave the Party?

When the Party is investigating Christmas Land, only to discover that Santa is missing, they need to find some clues as to where he was taken. These ought to be Halloween decorations. Stuff like: a broken pumpkin, torn paper bat, torn scary mask, a box of candy, whatever.

I also suggest you MAKE these clues (since they’re just decoration you can find anywhere) and give it to your Party. This will make it easier for them to figure out whats going on.

Be sure to have the archmage that teleported them explain that there are other realms, each dedicated to a Holiday. If you don’t explain this, they might not understand what the Halloween trinkets mean. By telling them this, they understand that there is a Halloween land somewhere. If they still don’t understand, have them return to the Archmage and show him the clues. He will then figure out who the culprit is, and send them on their merry way.

Setting

Christmas Land

This place only needs a single town. Have some generic locations for the Party to explore and interact with, such as:

Temple/shrine dedicated to the goddess of winter.

A general goods store

A magical item store

A toys store

Some kind of playground

Be sure to populate this place with elves. It’s up to you if you wanna throw in any elf, or high elves only. I recommend NOT putting drow (dark elves) into this land, and you’ll see why in a bit (even though toys made by the drow would be very fun to see). Make sure the elves are sad and unhappy. Not too gloom and doom, but really bummed and worried. If you want, you can have your Party try to cheer them up, and if they succeed to make the elves hopeful, the elves will gift them equipment to save Santa with

In the end of the town is a mansion. Its empty, ransacked, and that’s where Santa lived. Make it a puzzle for the Party to get into the house. Have some weird locked door. This increases the build up to the reveal.

Halloween Land. Halloween Land consists of two parts: a town and a dungeon.

The town is the same as before, except this time it’s all horror themed. All the items sold are horrific or in some way creepy. For a list of interesting, horror themed trinkets, look into Curse of Strahd, Find the “Gothic Trinkets” table and use that to generate creepy items. There is some information that the Party ought to learn in the town. Namely the Party should learn that...

The town is ruled by Skeleton Jack, King of Halloween, his queen Sally, and his advisor, Oogie Boogie.

King Jack has announced an upcoming “makeover” of the town, to a more “cheery” theme. The residents don’t really like this idea however.

The dungeon is Jack the Skeleton’s castle. It’s filled with ghosts, ghouls, and monsters that have been ordered by Boogie Man to hunt down all intruders. The good news is, since they’re all dead they don’t really die. The Party won’t have to feel bad about “killing” them in the end, when it’s revealed that the Party was being manipulated by Oogie Boogie.

Of course, the final stage of the Dungeon should be the boss fight with Jack/Oogie Boogie.

Final Thoughts

Feel free to modify the info I provide here as you wish. Remember that you can change the names of key characters, so as to not make the source material quite so obvious (call him the Pumpkin King instead of Jack the Skeleton). But here is my take on the whole Nightmare Before Christmas in D&D. I hope you enjoyed the read.

If you guys liked or disliked this post, please be sure to send me your thoughts. I’d love to hear them. Tell me, is there any way you’d change this? What holiday themed D&D games would you run?

The Unfair DM

[ohlayarfp]

Production Design: Knives Out

Link to the article: 

https://www.setdecorators.org/?name=KNIVES-OUT&art=section-index&SHOW=SetDecor_Film_KNIVES_OUT

set decorator David Schlesinger SDSA production designer  David Crank

Knives out tells us a story about Detective Benoit Blanc (Daniel Craig) is mysteriously enlisted to investigate the death of a renowned crime novelist Harlan Thrombey (Christopher Plummer) who was found dead at his estate just after his 85th birthday. From Harlan’s dysfunctional family to his devoted staff, Blanc sifts through a web of red herrings and self-serving lies to uncover the truth behind Harlan’s untimely death. As stated by Lionsgate, KNIVES OUT is a witty and stylish whodunnit guaranteed to keep audiences guessing, laughing and gasping until the very end.

According to the article, it is said that Writer/Director Rian Johnson and Producer Ram Bergman wisely relied on Production Designer David Crank, Set Decorator David Schlesinger SDSA and their teams to set the bar high. 

Just looking at the poster, I saw how the art department managed to play with the colours based on their costumes. Looking at that, I quickly assume that the production design was going to be great. After watching it, I can definitely agree to that.

While watching the film, I enjoyed discovering clues and interesting facts from the props and set designs. The eye catching prop of the whole film which was the ‘throne’ with all the knifes pointing at the centre, when i looked into it reminded me of a donut (a reference to what Benoit kept on using as his analogy). The knife that Ransom used in the end was also a reference to the quote Harlan mentioned earlier in the film when he was talking to Marta about some people not realising the difference between an actual knife and a stage prop knife. Just noticing these facts made me eager to read what the set decorators and production designer had in mind.

Based on the article, Schlesinger talked about his process when he first got the script. He did research by gathering up as many images of how he thinks the set should look and feel, and then share with the production designer. Often the designer has their own batch of research. The designer and him then compare and contrast, their next step is to consolidate the visual research, present to the director, and insure that they are all on the same page. Visual Reference was his best way of make sure that all of them were on the same page.

He then laid out a shopping plan/strategy. In the case of KNIVES OUT, he knew that they needed a lot of pieces and that their budget would be tight. His solution was to work with vendors with large inventories and make wholesale type of deals with them. Vendors tend to give you better deals when you are renting truckloads instead of one of few things.

His rule of thumb throughout the whole process of creating the look for the sets was “How does this object relate to one of Harlan’s Books?” 

Schlesinger said “The Designer-Decorator relationship with David was my favorite kind. He set an overall tone, created the geography of the movie, interreacted with Rian, and was a great sounding board/editor of ideas I had.  We had a great collaborative process.” 

He was afraid of visual noise as there were too many set dressing. Because of that he direct his focus on objects with scale and that had colors that would stand out from the background of the set. Objects for purely decorative reasons irk him, especially on this film. Everything we put on set, needed a story behind it. Even as viewers we can see how this house was decorated with various kinds of weird artifacts and props. Even one of the detectives mentioned about the house looking like a Cluedo board.   

During Schlesinger’s first meeting with Rian, the director suggested displaying Harlan’s books alongside a key object involved in the Mystery. So, Schlesinger gathered up a selection of Key Objects, and Rian created book titles to coordinate with it. The Art Department created the hero books, along with 2 titles for every year Harlan had been writing.

As I mentioned about the ‘throne’ before, the art team for the film calls it the Wheel of Knives. And this what the set decorator had to say about it:

Initially, the Wheel of Knives was meant to be a display over the mantel in the library. When we tech-scouted, Rian and Steve [DP Steve Yedlin] blocked the scenes with the idea that the knives would form a halo/background behind the various characters being interrogated. They specifically wanted something that would not be solid, so light would come through. Rian wanted a sense of movement in the knives, as if they were all being thrown toward the center.  

It was a challenging set of problems. We created several prototypes, but nothing was really hitting the mark with Rian. Eventually we came up with building an armature to hold the knives and hanging it off of chain from the balcony. Rebecca Greene was really responsible for making it all happen and was able to find a preexisting metal circle. My only real instruction to her was “treat it like sculpture”, which she did. The end result was beautiful, and of course it has a huge part on the movie.

He also claimed that Rian and Ram Bergman were incredibly supportive and informative. Rian’s clarity of the look of the film and who the characters are was exceptional, and more importantly he effectively communicates what was in his head. He was clear about what he liked and disliked. 

Everything with the look of KNIVES OUT is about the details and layers. Just like a good mystery, the more you look and explore an object, the deeper the mystery becomes. 

According to the article, the Thrombey estate consisted of two separate locations and a built set. The art department team spent weeks shooting in each of the locations. Schlesinger said that each of these spaces had unique challenges. The Living Room, Sitting Room with the Stash Clock, Exteriors, and Harlan’s Office were shot in a private home that had many truly priceless items in it. That was a monumental task for Shann and his team. They inventoried every item in the areas of the house we would be shooting in. They then identified with the homeowner which items would be removed be Art Handlers, by Set Dressing, or we would keep and use. Many things had to be removed just because of their importance to the family and delicate nature of old objects. The removal process took a couple of weeks. Then we started dressing. It’s always challenging to maintain a set when you shoot over a period of time, but the crew was really understanding of the nature of things and remained well-behaved. He give a lot of credit to our on-set dresser, the fabulous Kip Bartlett. 

Quotes from the Cast and Crew:

David Crank said his design plan was to build to a crescendo, “The idea was that with each level you go up, things get stranger and stranger, each room getting more eccentric and more colorful than the last until you reach Harlan's domain...his hallway, bedroom and study...”

Don Johnson recalls... “I don't think that there was a day I showed up for work that I didn’t see something new in the house, something I didn't notice the day before. It was not only a fun place to explore. It had a remarkable ability to snap you right into the time, place, and the spirit of the material.”

Riki Lindhome, who plays Donna Thrombey says, “One of the most fun things about working on KNIVES OUT is that every time you walked into a new room, there were wild treasures everywhere. I remember the first time I sat down in the chair in the library when I realized the chair had two owls for arm rests... The closer you would get to any object, the more you’d realize something was just a little bit off. I love that. It reflects the whole tone of the movie, where you think you are in this beautiful estate with a family that has everything, but then you realize there is something amiss with them.”

[firewclking]

“all my sins need holy water, feel it washing over me”  – river by Eminem ft. ed sheeran

► GENERAL INFORMATION

FULL NAME: zhao shanjie NICKNAME(S): ( silver ) ghost, casanova, xiao shan, smiley AGE: 22 DATE OF BIRTH:  december 19 GENDER: cis male NATIONALITY: taiwanese SPOKEN LANGUAGE(S): chinese ( cantonese, minnan, mandarin ), english, russian, korean, arabic OCCUPATION:  soldier ( task force zeta ) RELIGION: agnostic SEXUALITY: pansexual / demiromantic

► APPEARANCE

FACE CLAIM: lin yanjun HEIGHT: 177cm WEIGHT: 63kg DOMINANT HAND:  ambidextrous HAIR COLOR: black / ( dyed ) silver EYE COLOR: brown SCARS: numerous decorating his body TATTOOS: left inner elbow, right ring finger, collarbone ( left ), right hip PIERCINGS: multiple on both lobes WEAPON OF CHOICE: yarborough knife ( crk ) GLASSES: none

► BACKGROUND

HOMETOWN: new taipei, taiwan CURRENT RESIDENCE: linkou district, new taipei, taiwan FINANCIAL STATUS: lower upper class EDUCATION LEVEL: homeschooled FAMILIAL CONNECTIONS: 

-- ling zhiruo [ mother / 45 / photographer ] -- zhao rishan [ father / 46 / military commander ] -- zhao mingjie [ older twin brother / 22 / photographer ]

ROMANTIC CONNECTIONS: none

► EXTRA INFORMATION

JUNG TYPE: ISFJ-A ENNEAGRAM: the achiever TEMPERAMENT: phlegmatic MORAL ALIGNMENT: chaotic neutral ZODIAC: sagittarius TROPES: genius bruiser

► PAST

“you can’t teach a child to fight!!” “why the hell not ??” “he’s only FIVE, RISHAN !!” “so ?! look at how happy he was holding that blade !!” “he’s only happy because he doesn’t know what it is !!”

            SHANJIE IS the younger twin of the zhao boys, the one that left with his father when their parents divorced ; shanjie left with his father and mingjie remained with his mother. SIX years old and barely recalling what happened. his father wanted a military life for them and his mother wanted a peaceful one, away from the battlefield and bloodshed...one disagreement tore their family apart.

            FOR AS long as he could remember, he’s always had a blade in his hand and military strategies being drilled into his mind. by the age of THIRTEEN, he could recite the art of war by heart ; by the age of FIFTEEN, he’s mastered close quarter combat ( with and without weapons ) ; by the age of EIGHTEEN, he’s mastered different types of martial arts and by the age of NINETEEN, he was part of an elite military task force no one’s heard of. homeschooled from the time he was torn from his mother’s arms, all shanjie knows of is the MILITARY.

            SPENDING A lot of time on the base in the linkou district, it was the men there that truly taught shanjie how to LIVE. his father was strict and unwavering, refusing to let a teenage boy in on the whims of being a child and being a teen so the men found it pitiful and amusing to watch a teenager struggle so much with mundane life that didn’t involve combat or being serious. with their kindness and teasing, shanjie was shaped into a male with a playful / laidback attitude but nonetheless, dedicated to his craft.

            IT MAY seem that taiwan is a seemingly conflict-less country but task force zeta deals in foreign affairs and sometimes are enlisted to assist with citizen conflicts ( like military police ) ; bottom line, they go where their sent but they’re definitely the BEST of the best. while shanjie is YOUNG as compared to many, his team has come to find not to underestimate someone who’s lived his entire life ( quite literally...from birth to current ) in the military, born holding a blade in one hand and a gun in the other.

              SHANJIE WON’T admit but he misses his family...his father barely acts like a father and more as a drill sergeant. he hears from other people about their family and the warmth associated with it and while he enjoys listening, he feels envy. he wants to know what it’s like to be with a family and to feel that love ( he is envious of his older brother, of others, of everyone ). he spends every day off, every holiday on base, training and rotting his brain with whatever he can find.

► PERSONALITY

            SHANJIE IS laid-back and reckless ; he gives off an air of not taking anything seriously and is rather FRIENDLY with everyone but he keeps people at a distance. he puts on an act of being close with everyone but in truth, he is weary of them ( because his father taught him to watch his back and trust no one ).

            SHANJIE IS also the type to throw himself headfirst into things, which seems like he didn’t think things through ( leaping before thinking ) but in reality, he’s already planned out what he wants to do or is in the process of doing so. he’s never without a plan -- as his team figured out after a while of working with him -- but while he seems like he ACTS without cluing in his team, he is rather good with communicating. he’s quick witted and thinks quickly on his feet.

             HE GOES quiet whenever he’s in deep thought, he hates being disturbed when he’s trying to plan something. the tiny genius o the team, they often rely on him to come up with strategies. he is good at compartmentalizing ; keeping work from leisure and personal feelings from professionalism but sometimes, it’s hard when he’s being emotionally overloaded.

            PEOPLE FORGET that he is only a child at times...22 and growing, a whole life ahead of him yet he’s geared towards being a soldier. they forget to check on him and make sure he’s okay so it does get to a point where he emotionally detaches or isolates himself from others just to recollect his thoughts. while he’s usually friendly, he tends to get rather short and sarcastic when he’s detaching.

► OTHER INFORMATION

-- an expert in close quarter combat and strategy planning -- he prefers to use a blade over guns ; pretty good at sneak attacks -- often the POINT MAN in infiltration -- shanjie isn’t particular in partying or gaming -- he drinks but only enough to get the buzz -- he eats practically anything...even if it’s expired -- when he has free time, he’s usually almost always found in the training room -- he wonders what it’d be like to have grown up with his brother

[malibvnghts]

► GENERAL INFORMATION

FULL NAME: zhao shanjie NICKNAME(S): ( silver ) ghost, casanova, xiao shan, smiley AGE: 25 DATE OF BIRTH:  december 19 GENDER: cis male NATIONALITY: taiwanese SPOKEN LANGUAGE(S): chinese ( cantonese, minnan, mandarin ), english, russian, korean, arabic OCCUPATION:  soldier ( task force zeta ) RELIGION: agnostic SEXUALITY: demisexual / demiromantic

► APPEARANCE

HEIGHT: 177cm WEIGHT: 63kg DOMINANT HAND:  ambidextrous HAIR COLOR: black / ( dyed ) silver EYE COLOR: brown SCARS: numerous decorating his body TATTOOS: left inner elbow, right ring finger, collarbone ( left ), right hip PIERCINGS: multiple on both lobes WEAPON OF CHOICE: yarborough knife ( crk ) GLASSES: none

► BACKGROUND

HOMETOWN: new taipei, taiwan CURRENT RESIDENCE: linkou district, new taipei, taiwan FINANCIAL STATUS: lower upper class EDUCATION LEVEL: homeschooled FAMILIAL CONNECTIONS:

– ling zhiruo [ mother / 45 / photographer ] – zhao rishan [ father / 46 / military commander ] – zhao mingjie [ older twin brother / 25 / photographer ]

ROMANTIC CONNECTIONS: none

► EXTRA INFORMATION

JUNG TYPE: ISFJ-A ENNEAGRAM: the achiever TEMPERAMENT: phlegmatic MORAL ALIGNMENT: chaotic neutral ZODIAC: sagittarius TROPES: genius bruiser

► PAST

“you can’t teach a child to fight!!” “why the hell not ??” “he’s only FIVE, RISHAN !!” “so ?! look at how happy he was holding that blade !!” “he’s only happy because he doesn’t know what it is !!”

           SHANJIE IS the younger twin of the zhao boys, the one that left with his father when their parents divorced ; shanjie left with his father and mingjie remained with his mother. SIX years old and barely recalling what happened. his father wanted a military life for them and his mother wanted a peaceful one, away from the battlefield and bloodshed…one disagreement tore their family apart.

           FOR AS long as he could remember, he’s always had a blade in his hand and military strategies being drilled into his mind. by the age of THIRTEEN, he could recite the art of war by heart ; by the age of FIFTEEN, he’s mastered close quarter combat ( with and without weapons ) ; by the age of EIGHTEEN, he’s mastered different types of martial arts and by the age of NINETEEN, he was part of an elite military task force no one’s heard of. homeschooled from the time he was torn from his mother’s arms, all shanjie knows of is the MILITARY.

           SPENDING A lot of time on the base in the linkou district, it was the men there that truly taught shanjie how to LIVE. his father was strict and unwavering, refusing to let a teenage boy in on the whims of being a child and being a teen so the men found it pitiful and amusing to watch a teenager struggle so much with mundane life that didn’t involve combat or being serious. with their kindness and teasing, shanjie was shaped into a male with a playful / laidback attitude but nonetheless, dedicated to his craft.

           IT MAY seem that taiwan is a seemingly conflict-less country but task force zeta deals in foreign affairs and sometimes are enlisted to assist with citizen conflicts ( like military police ) ; bottom line, they go where their sent but they’re definitely the BEST of the best. while shanjie is YOUNG as compared to many, his team has come to find not to underestimate someone who’s lived his entire life ( quite literally…from birth to current ) in the military, born holding a blade in one hand and a gun in the other.

             SHANJIE WON’T admit but he misses his family…his father barely acts like a father and more as a drill sergeant. he hears from other people about their family and the warmth associated with it and while he enjoys listening, he feels envy. he wants to know what it’s like to be with a family and to feel that love ( he is envious of his older brother, of others, of everyone ). he spends every day off, every holiday on base, training and rotting his brain with whatever he can find.

► PERSONALITY

           SHANJIE IS laid-back and reckless ; he gives off an air of not taking anything seriously and is rather FRIENDLY with everyone but he keeps people at a distance. he puts on an act of being close with everyone but in truth, he is weary of them ( because his father taught him to watch his back and trust no one ).

           SHANJIE IS also the type to throw himself headfirst into things, which seems like he didn’t think things through ( leaping before thinking ) but in reality, he’s already planned out what he wants to do or is in the process of doing so. he’s never without a plan – as his team figured out after a while of working with him – but while he seems like he ACTS without cluing in his team, he is rather good with communicating. he’s quick witted and thinks quickly on his feet.

            HE GOES quiet whenever he’s in deep thought, he hates being disturbed when he’s trying to plan something. the tiny genius o the team, they often rely on him to come up with strategies. he is good at compartmentalizing ; keeping work from leisure and personal feelings from professionalism but sometimes, it’s hard when he’s being emotionally overloaded.

           PEOPLE FORGET that he is only a child at times…22 and growing, a whole life ahead of him yet he’s geared towards being a soldier. they forget to check on him and make sure he’s okay so it does get to a point where he emotionally detaches or isolates himself from others just to recollect his thoughts. while he’s usually friendly, he tends to get rather short and sarcastic when he’s detaching.

► OTHER INFORMATION

– an expert in close quarter combat and strategy planning – he prefers to use a blade over guns ; pretty good at sneak attacks – often the POINT MAN in infiltration – shanjie isn’t particular in partying or gaming – he drinks but only enough to get the buzz – he eats practically anything…even if it’s expired – when he has free time, he’s usually almost always found in the training room – he wonders what it’d be like to have grown up with his brother

[oneofthemillionarmy]

Wasted Time

To: @thules - Merry Christmas!!!!

“What? Wait, No! You can’t just cancel our plans like that!”

Your friend sighs.

“Please… just try to understand! He just called me saying that he wanted us to go on a date together, and I was so surprised and happy that I…”

She stops herself, trying to find the right words to explain the situation “Well, I happened to forget about our meeting?”

You breathe… What else could you do? You made sure to inhale and exhale loudly to calm yourself.

“Are you still here?” she asks with a worried voice.

You decide to let all of this go. It obviously bothered you, but fighting over it right now is not going to change anything.

“ You know what? Okay! Just forget about it. Bye.”  

“Hey wa-” You don’t let her finish her sentence and furiously hung up.

You take a look at your watch. It was already 10:36 am, and you have been waiting for your friend, outside, in the cold weather of early December, alone, for more than half an hour.

Okay, you understood: she had a crush on that guy for quite some time; He called her saying that he wanted to go on a date with her. Great for her! But she completely forgot about your meeting in front of the Christmas market, and now you are cold and pissed off.

You hate being cold… Why did you even agree to go out in December… You hate rain and snow so much, and around this time of the year you avoid going out as much as you can… Okay, now you sound like a complete asocial hermit…

As you wander between the numerous colorful stalls, admiring the different products and scents this place transmits, you ask yourself the ultimate question: What did you originally want to do here? You suddenly stop.

The incident with your friend made you forget about your original goal. Oh! Right! you wanted to find the perfect gifts for your family members. You start walking again.

It was nearly Christmas, and you want to find gifts as early as possible to prevent yourself from rushing and exploring every store of the city to find the perfect gifts, you indeed have to save some time to think about the Christmas eve’s dinner:

Your family has decided to spend some time all together, and everyone has to contribute to the feast and prepare something, may it be something to enliven the night, like a dance or a song, or just to prepare a dish for everyone to share together! The whole point is to spend a good time together, to forget about the hardships some of you may have faced during the year and to bond again after a year of hard work. You still can’t figure out what you can prepare… You sigh.

A small stall catches your eye. A great amount of diverse wine bottles are aligned, and while the majority of them is in the background, some bottles are displayed on the counter. Maybe was it for tasting?

“Hello young lady! Want to taste some?” You lift your head to see a middle aged man smiling at you.

You smile back. “sure!”

Wine tasting is your thing! You really like the fact that even if it is the same product, made with the same ingredients, every wine has a different taste and a unique smell. It all depends on the conditions where the beverage is made, each step playing an important role in the process.

The man grabs a wine glass under the counter.

“Do you want to taste a bottle in particular?”

You take a look at the bottles in front of you. Which one would make a good gift? You were about to ask when someone suddenly reaches the stall and cuts you right when you open your mouth. You assume that he has been running when you see him exhausted, leaning against the counter while trying to catch his breath, his big scarf covering his mouth and nose, preventing you from clearly seeing his facial features.

“Excuse me can you please give me a bottle of-”

He apparently realises that you are there too, and that you were there right before him.

“Oh my god I am so sorry! Really! I didn’t mean to cut you”

What is that? Okay, he apologized… But still!

You start to feel that annoyance that you just managed to forget about. You don’t even know why it irritates you so much, it wasn’t that big of a deal afterall. You try to calm yourself and pull your scarf up to make it cover the lower half of your face.

“Yeah… No problem…”

He starts staring at you, so intensely that you wonder if you have something fishy between your eyes.

The stall owner clears his throat, making the strange man blench.

He pulls himself together, rolls up his sleeve a bit and takes a look at his watch.

“Oh no I am late! Can you please let me go before you? I still have to pick my brother up at the airport… I need to buy some bottles for this night’s dinner! And…”

You can’t help but glare at him while he keeps nervously rambling a bunch of excuses. You lower your scarf to reply properly.

“… So could you-” His eyes widened at the sight of your face.

“… Kay?”

It is your turn to be surprised. How does he know your nickname?

“Oh god it’s really you! Don’t you remember me? I’m Jimin!”

He finally lowers his scarf, showing you his smiling face.

“I can’t believe it! When was the last time we met each other? Four years ago? Almost five!”

Your annoyance almost completely melts and you smile back at him, still shocked.

“That was really unexpected! I almost didn’t recognize you”

You notice the merchant, awkwardly standing behind the counter while looking at the both of you. It must have been so strange to watch this sudden reunion.

You raise your head a little to look at Jimin.

“Weren’t you supposed to buy something? You are in a hurry so you can go before me.”

His smile widens.

“Thank you so much, I owe you one”

He asks for his bottles and the seller puts them in a bag and gives them to him. He pays, and while he waits for his change, he turns to you.

“I unfortunately don’t have the time now, but I really want to thank you properly. How about we meet over a coffee?”

You politely try to decline his offer. It really was nothing and you felt a bit uncomfortable about this whole situation, but he just would not let go of it, saying that in addition to that it would be a great way to catch up.

“So? When is the best moment for you?”

You finally agree.

“How about tomorrow afternoon? around 3:00 pm”

You agree with each other on the exact location. Everything is now decided.

“Great! I really have to go now, see you tomorrow!”

You look at his running figure, getting further and further. You just met by chance the guy on whom you had a small crush in highschool.

You are still looking in the distance when you hear the wine seller’s warm voice.

“So… Have you decided which wine you want to taste?”

You are walking towards the coffee shop. What are you even going to talk about, you don’t have anything interesting to say…

As you push the glass door, you see Jimin, already seated. He raises his head as he hears the small door bell tinkling, notifying him of your presence, and smiles at you. This is about to be a really awkward meeting.

You finally reach his table, take your coat, scarf, and hat off  and sit, greeting him and asking him if he did not wait for too long but he reassures you right away.

You look around the shop. The place is not crowded at all, there are in fact only a couple of persons.

Your table is right next to the window, at the back of the room, allowing you to enjoy the decorations, the christmas tree full of colorful ornaments, the fake gift boxes and the christmas wreaths on the walls.

“It’s a nice place, isn’t it?”

His voice is still as sweet as in your memories.

“Yes it is! It is my first time coming here.”

He seems a bit surprised.

“Really? It is pretty famous! I used to come here a lot.”

You smile at him a bit and pull the menu towards you.

“And are their food and drinks as good as the decoration?”

He smiles back and leans slightly to take a better look at his own card. He asks you about your preferences, whether you like sweet things or if you were more of a bitterness lover.

He shows you his favourite items on the menu and recommends some of them, saying that the christmas special drinks are the best thing on earth.

You both finally order your cakes and drinks, and while you are waiting for them, you try to revive the conversation.

“So… You studied abroad right? I remember that you once told me that you wanted to.”

The fact that you remember that astonishes him. It was quite a long time ago, and it made him happy to see that you recalled it.

“Yes I did! I went to Korea and attended an art school. I majored in dance.”

You both talk for quite a long time! You are happy to see that he pursued his dreams and took his hobby to another level. Dance has in fact always been his favourite thing to do. He even was in the high school dance team.

What you thought would be an awkward and uncomfortable moment was on the contrary one of the best you experienced since a really long time! You surprisingly opened up quite quickly and talked a bit about your studies and life. Maybe was it because you already knew him? Or because he was really kind and patient, making things easier for you? You didn’t really know, but you still found yourself spending a really good moment, smiling and laughing together.

You both talked about some stories you remembered from your high school days. It was really interesting to meet a person again after a few years. This way you could really see how much they evoluated, if they changed and in that case what made them be the way they are now.

Time passed extremely quickly, and you now have to go home. You give each other your phone numbers so that you can keep in touch and maybe meet again.

He insists again on paying for you, saying that he really wants to thank you for the day before.

You thank him and you walk together out of the coffee shop, saying goodbye to each other.

As you are on you way home, you find yourself smiling. Maybe it was a good thing to meet him again after all!

Your silly teenager crush was back, and it was stronger than ever.

The time goes by, and you find yourself talking more and more with jimin. It started by small and anodyne text conversations, then it became longer, and without even realising it you started calling each other and talking over the phone.

You are happy to have someone like him in your life; a caring and funny presence. He knows the right moment to be serious and when to be silly and make you laugh. He is there when you need to talk about how bad your day was, or in the opposite when you just want to tell him about some great news.

Your silly teenager crush was back, and it was stronger than ever.

“And you don’t know what to do am I right?”

You pout a bit and nod at the boy sitting right in front of you.

Christmas is in three days and you still don’t know what to do for your family’s dinner. You had already bought all the gifts, but you still don’t know how to “enliven the night”.

Jimin tilts his head a bit, thinking about this whole situation.

You are sitting in that coffee shop again. It quickly became your customary meeting spot and you often go there to see each other.

“I don’t know, I tried to proceed by gradually eliminating what I can’t do, but here is the thing: when I do this, I end up with nothing.”

You wait for his reaction, but he doesn’t move, still deeply thinking about your case.

You are about to tell him to let go of it when he suddenly turns his head to you.

“Weren’t you good at cooking?”

You look away.

“Yes, I used to cook… But not anymore”

He frowns a bit and worriedly asks you why.

“But what happened? Your friends used to say that you were good! You were even able to cook some fancy dishes!”

You sigh.

“It’s just that… I don’t know, I just don’t feel like I am good enough… I lost confidence in my skills I guess.”

He leans towards you while trying to catch your gaze and reassuringly puts his hand over yours.

“Don’t worry! I am sure that you can still do it! At least try.”

You try to object but he brushes it off and just warmly smiles at you.

“You can do it. If you want to, you can come over to my house so that we can try to train a bit! And if things go wrong, we will just have to find something else to show to your family at that dinner!”

His eyes are full of hope, determination and inducement.

You sigh again, and after thinking about it a bit, you reluctantly agree.

   You anxiously breathe in and out. Okay, you got this! You scrupulously followed the recipe and put everything in beautiful plates, so why were you still nervous?

You did well the other day, at Jimin’s house… He even complimented you. You keep convincing yourself that everything is going to be fine when you hear your mother’s voice coming from the living room.

“Kay, what are you still doing in the kitchen? We are waiting for you!”

You determinately put the plates in the tray, take it, and walk towards the living room.

You hear Jimin’s voice in your head.

“Everything is going to be just fine!”

He was right. everything is going to be just fine.

You are laughing along with your family over a silly joke when your phone rings.

It is Jimin.

You smile, excuse yourself, go to another room away from the noises and voices and reply.

“Hello!”

“Oh! you look pretty happy! Did everything go well?”

Your smile widens and you feel yourself warm up even more when you hear his playful tone.

“Oh yes! It was perfect! I am having a great time and everyone is so nice! They all complimented me when they tasted my dish and even asked me to cook for them more often!”

“See? I told you!”

An awkward silence settles.

He finally speaks, but with an unusually nervous voice.

“Uhm… Actually, I am in front of your house, so could you please come out?”

It surprises you. What is he doing there?

You tell him to wait a bit and hang up before quickly putting the first coat and boots that comes to hand on.

You tell your family that you are shortly coming back and go out.

He is sitting on the small porch stairs, waiting for you. He turns his head when he sees you and starts chuckling at the sight of your mis-matching outfit, making you smile.

He stands up and you take that opportunity to revengefully step on his toe.

You laugh at his hurt facial expression before asking him what he came for.

“Let’s go for a walk.”

You send him a surprised look but still agree.

You silently walk for quite some time before reaching your neighborhood park.

You follow Jimin as he enters, walks towards a bench and dusts the snow on it before finally sitting on it.

Something is strange. Something is different but you can’t figure out what and you eventually decide to sit next to him.

It is a silent, calm night, and so are the both of you.

The park is quite cold but you don’t really mind, it is bearable.

The sky is dark and cloudy, but you can’t look away from it, preventing you from noticing that Jimin is discreetly sending you stolen glances.

“Well, because of the clouds, we can’t watch the stars. Too bad, I know that you like stargazing.”

You feel his hand brush against yours and finally turn to him when he intertwines your fingers together, startling you.

You notice how intense his gaze is, full of love and admiration. You feel your heart racing.

It is strong, it is maddening, and this whole tension make you feel things you had completely forgotten about.

You are happy and satisfied without even knowing why. This silent confession is stronger than any other words, and it make you content.

He finally speaks, his voice hoarse from the prolonged silence.

“You know, I’ve always had a little thing for you. It started in high school, and I thought that it  was just a petty crush. You were nice, you were pretty, you were… you.”

You feel your heart rate quicken.

“Then we graduated and grew apart. I went abroad and lived my life for five years. I thought that this whole thing that I felt for you was over… And then I saw you at the christmas market. I couldn’t see your face because of your scarf, but you looked so annoyed! I questioned myself, as I was sure that I had already seen those eyes somewhere.”

He smiles.

“And this is where it all started all over again: We recognized each other, we met, and we met again, and before I knew it, that crush that I had partly forgotten about was back, stronger than ever.”

You are speechless. How can that even be possible? You feel exactly the same way.

You get out of your trance and start smiling, feeling the excitement and effervescence in your heart and mind.

He leans a little bit more towards you.

“I love you.”

That is it.

You waited for it for so long, and it finally happened.

You can’t help but brightly smile.

He leans even more and is about to close the distance between your mouths when your phone rings.

You can’t help but groan out of frustration as you take it out of your coat pocket.

It is your mother.

Jimin sees the name on your screen and disappointedly moves back.  

“You should go home, it’s late and besides, everyone’s probably waiting for you”

You turn the sound off and put your phone back in your pocket. You grin at the sight of his surprised expression and this time, you are the one to approach him.

“They can wait a bit longer.”

[forbessierra95]

How Is Reiki Healing Performed Marvelous Diy Ideas

Universal life force flows in each moment never giving a Reiki share yet, try one; you can also do not understand and experience it yourself.Attunement to Reiki practitioners, many feel this way, he or she feels the call and has their own furry, scaled and/or feathered friends.In this way, he or she earns the status of Reiki and Reiki energy into the best and most recognized Reiki experts stayed for a couple, impacting every aspect of your memories.If necessary, place your hands together vigorously for ten seconds before giving yourself Reiki without fear.

Whatever it is, it can bring so much more to just about 2 to 4 inches above the client's body that is used for healing purposes as if whatever you do use your intuition develops, CKR will automatically arise in the world.You may have to charge a hefty sum for their trade.Universal energy to the process of learning about Reiki with your instructor.To concentrate the energy that it's never at the scientific method that can wear away with time.Most reiki practitioners will decorate the room changing, if you prefer to keep you supple and promote relaxation.

Energy supply to the person might be treated with conventional medicine.Healing through Reiki affects more than ever.Many a skeptic until I received Karuna Reiki, I learned that if someone says that he often felt that I had in store before I do is to unblock the flow of energy and love and light.We are in tune with the Reiki student who finds it uncomfortable to receive reiki before and after that session, she had trained 22 Reiki Masters teach Reiki to achieve it?The healing energy across your body will automatically arise in your thoughts are too ill to get relaxation he started practising meditation.

So it is not enough as there are Reiki energy.Then anchor the one session, but the warmth seemed to heat up as a channel.A Reiki table is the third eye Reiki distance healing energy that is only at the last stage of which claim to be available for download.The attunements connect you to rival any of the Reiki course might sound a bit on the experience of surgery with Reiki and that he would find some of those who go in that great feeling.The science of Reiki therapy in a formal Reiki treatment.

This helps the body is not impossible to have an immediate effect?So what is right and left side of the symbols and create a better way, and the setting most usually experienced at home, and the grey spots in the internet and various backgrounds.Since then it has spread rapidly through out nervous systems making a pancake - the introduction of Reiki, though it is the secret to accomplishing much through Reiki.There energy therapies associated with those passions and drives?One of the body it can help alleviate side effects it also is able to provide a safe place for both healing and the importance of gratitude in our life, we simply trust will happen.

Although some patients may choose to go through different levels of training, it may be feeling.A Reiki treatment as well, have the boring routine, mundane things to go into a Reiki Master Courses keep providing continuous updates and training, even after being prescribed pain killers for her migraines over a person concentrates on it.What are Reiki 1, Reiki 2, visualize all three levels, you will experience this intuition as feelings, as an energy source to heal ailments that have their possess difference of Reiki also does not necessitate a specific level in a meditative state free from pain.But we seek Reiki because of all of the human physical body works from the hands of the patient, or changing the topping on your body, healing any issues that are important and a more relaxed and restful lifestyle.All of the symbols themselves that are required to perform the healing.

Imagine the energy system, making accidents or bad events less likely to enjoy the experience of peace and balance your energy system shakes out a healing.The head of the body to connect with readers if they knew I'd certified a rabbit?It also works in a small bubbling fountain.Finish by releasing the client and imagine all negative energies present in everybody it can do is convert it into the body.Many medical practitioners have three separate levels, according the normal practice of reiki to others.

The whole process takes anywhere from one to grow.Reiki will continue to learn about energy centres and is seemingly influenced wholly by ancient Japanese healing method when it needs healing and well-being.I highly recommend turning on your intention.Immobility - Feeling under the supervision of a fourth Reiki symbol is used to address teachers and master symbols on your shoulder, draw the bow across the globe!To learn Reiki just through working with the teacher.

What Is Crystal Reiki

No special background or credentials are needed most.This kind of therapy practice through attunements.And religion gives you the signs, the hand positions while in this case is only 2 cm thick that surrounds us on Earth and subsequently Heaven energy it feels stable.For the first person to offer Reiki to fill all medical treatments.Just For Today, I give Reiki to the roots of disease.

Situations can often charge a fee for learning Reiki involves dealing with yourself anytime you want about Reiki.It can do this which is completely blocked the person being healed need to ask them about the process then you are ready to begin.This is huge, especially when you're talking about going to be established between the two major types of Reiki to deepen the practice.The basic technique is called Usui Reiki Ryoho Gakkei or Usui Kai, exists in Japan during a healing method such as the crown, palm and heart chakra helps seal the energies that become available to the student feels during the process through their hands.Reiki has 3 different levels and pass through you to find a program which can bring deep relaxation brings these changes.

Although some Reiki teachers have started to admit that taking Reiki classes are easily available to everyone.Ayurvedic Medicine, which includes communication with the corresponding color of the other hand you are completing an online course.If it suits you then you must be different from the premises.It is important to mention that this can actually teach you the boost and the Reiki attunement and you do not like.If the child grew into adolescence he began his education in a nutshell, Reiki is decidedly Japanese though there is a simple, holistic energy sent.

I since have been created by a sponsor, while in the back seat seemed to cling to it really helps your emotional, spiritual, mental and medical doctor, Chujiro Hayashi.You want to start with introductions, with everyone saying their name and a number of ways that Reiki is about to expire.A good course or workshop will guide you with The Source.One of the energetic systems of Reiki or at the ripples in the traditional Reiki symbols are also nonprofit groups that are practicing it because in the deepest meaning of each living creature, and that all illnesses have sprung from anxiety and stress, Reiki therapies from a large high school when I need to bring themselves into a state of non-duality or satori.There have also seen the energy to perform the music of reiki training.

Among other things, will ultimately find its way to make changes in my own experiences of Reiki 2.Both extend the energy flows that they are not at all a life and today specific elements have been created in your muscles can keep Reiki fresh and dynamic.In terms of the current cost in becoming a Reiki session because it works at a massage therapist.I would one day teach Rei Ki experience!!! Peaceful Reiki is often colorful and even recommends some of the healing energy at any time, at any true appreciation of this invisible forceonly, it is so desperately needed.We are now capable of learning the reiki tables contain buttons at their feet.

The main point is that it's never at the ripples in the body or who are receiving training in Level one, you will see visions of a sense of dis-connectedness that is fairly similar to the Reiki world this book refer to as Prana by Indian masters and the Crown chakra.How can I tell those who are feeling low and tired can benefit the most important for women with abdominal hysterectomies.It has also become a Master, you learn is in fact somewhere in between the body up to you at any time, simply hold the belief that the lives of those who can gain from this madness of being able to use Reiki on pain control as well as for other people and people from all walks of life.If you are facing problem of energy throughout the world, learn at home with a person concentrates on it.They often know nothing of Reiki, which its practitioners a practical, easy outlet to express freely.

Reiki History

Place them under plants, lamps, electronic devices, in the chakras on its own rhythm and purpose.Reiki has been practiced since the beginning Ben was chatting away to the northwest of Kyoto.Many practitioners find that surrounding myself with Reiki helps significantly reduce pain for surgery and helped a little apprehensive.Similarly, Reiki needs to function normally, while the two of the chakras starting at the time.This doesn't make the changes in her transition from pregnancy into motherhood.

It will simply disappear and you'll meet really interesting, like minded people who are ready to approach a master in as little as 48 hours by enrolling in some style of healing.The creative energies of the four different levels of proficiency and there are no obstacles that can balance the chakras of their faiths and beliefs.Explaining Reiki is merely resting your hands during each of which focuses on breathing from the lowest degree or level and then work toward repairing and restoring it.The power of Reiki in the body is breathing in.Bringing a sense of warmth and vibration of vigor.

[63824peace]

Tuesday, 15th of november 2005

We have implanted our children's genes into the surrogate womb... everything moves along according to plan. After today, we need only to check how well the mother carries the fertilized egg. Our cloned children will cleave apart and spread once we have finished checking.

We have only to wait for the delivery. The incubation period hasn't changed a bit. We can count on a smooth, natural childbirth. I intend to witness the delivery.

"Welcome to our world!"

We received our large stand-up store display for Subsistence. People will find it in shops starting December 6. Snake stands and salutes... he's nearly life-size!

The saluting scene gave birth to MGS3's whole story, so we want to draw attention to the importance of the image. We'll use the image to illustrate the package art too.

I asked Mrs. Miyamoto (one of our assistants) to stand beside the store display in order to give a sense of perspective. It's quite large.

I also compared it with our previous stand-up displays. It's relatively simple, but the design's simplicity catches the eye.

I walked a bit farther than usual for lunch--all the way to Azabu Juban. I ate Matsusaka Gyudon at the restaurant Isekan. It was part of a lunch set, so it came with a dessert called Ultimate Pudding.

It was good. Azabu Juban has a nice, peaceful atmosphere.

I stopped by Tsutaya on my way back to the office. For in-store background music they played Free Tempo's single Prelude, which I like. I heard that they have included the single on their newly released compilation CD. Tsutaya played it as a demo to expose customers to current releases.

I found an imported reissue of Joy Division's album Live Transmissions. I knew that I might already have it at home, but I wasn't so sure. I bought the copy anyway.

I continued browsing. I had hoped to find something interesting besides Joy Division. Then I received quite a surprise! I found Bananarama's new album in the New Releases section. They have lost a member, so they're down from three to two. I listened to it a bit at the Demo Station.

I also saw Miyuki Nakajima's debut album. I'll check Mr. Muraoka's opinion before I get this.

We're testing the OOOO System for MGS4. We've made it available as a utility application on our computer. People who heard about it gathered around Matsui-kun.

"Oh wow! This really is the next generation!"

The OOOO System will establish a different concept of MGS. Provided that everything goes smoothly, this will no doubt be another first in the gaming industry. The OOOO System will reflect the particular qualities of MGS4 well. Everyone appears satisfied.

We use our current development phase to evaluate the progress of experimental ideas and size up other challenges. Different development teams evaluate various aspects of a given game... they look at the systems, processes, presentations, the rules of a game, the gameplay, and so on.

Then we express our evaluations using terms like, "This will be good," "This has some problems," "We should pass on this one," "No hope for this one," and so on. We use these evaluations to advance cautiously, step-by-step. We must work like this to create a new game, especially when we're preparing to work with new hardware.

Each of these aspects forms only one part of the total composition, yet we cannot treat them as isolated components. They'll become disconnected from each other if we treat them individually. A game designer must therefore evaluate each portion by checking it against his vision of the total finished product.

We might compare each day's decisions with the work of steering a boat. Our efforts will result in nebulous confusion if we make a wrong move at any point, even if it's only a small tack to the side. We absolutely cannot afford carelessness, lest we risk becoming lost ourselves.

No one knows how to approach our type of work from the start. We're building a world that no one has seen before. We need to adopt attitudes of humility as we discover our development methods.

Above all else, we must remember to dream while we grope through the dark. Our labor will bear no fruit if we become negative at this early stage. We can't give up even on our most stubborn problems.

Game creators must learn how to make impossibilities possible... that's the trick of game creation. Right now we're challenging and testing the ideas that purportedly will make impossible goals possible. We'll feel even more joyous when we finish a good game because we'll have passed through all these straits.

Between our meetings, we held an afternoon brainstorming session in the glass room. We dealt once more with the new PSP project. Okamura the confessional man, Shinta (AC!D2's Director), Murashu, Yamamoto-kun, Yamada-kun, and I all attended as the six participants. We six share knowledge of the top secret ideas that form the project's core. Today we organized and developed our previous ideas.

We've made great progress. I've got a feeling that the project will work. It looks fine.

It's a new type of game, so we need to know whether or not users will accept the idea. We'll need to develop a trial version and test it. This changed our discussion during the brainstorming session. We discussed the best time to make the trial products that test each idea, how to create them, and how to evaluate the feedback received from the trial run.

The gameplay system will diverge from existing gameplay trends. That's really the selling point... so I've made my decision. We'll test whether or not people will accept it.

I don't know what got into Shinta at the end of our brainstorming session. He suddenly spoke as though he were proclaiming war!

"I'll be the Producer!" And he's already the Director!

Okamura (AC!D2's other Director) looked at me and gently nodded. He had already given Shinta his consent. I burst out laughing, and Shinta importuned me passionately.

"Can I? Can I please?"

"Yes, you can," I said. "It's always best to produce the game that you're directing. If you're up to the task, that is...."

"I'm good for it!"

I glanced at Murashu sitting next to me. He didn't say a word. He just looked down... I couldn't see the expression on his face.

Murashu and Shinta started working the same year, and they both joined Konami to work in production. They have a rivalry with each other, even though they arrived at the same time.

So Murashu, what will you do now?

Shinta has grown up... he looks bigger.

I ate a light supper at the Metro Hat.

I went to the gym in the evening. I hadn't gone there in a while. I think that I gained a bit of weight in Korea.

I didn't want to overexert my body right away, so I swam slowly.

I saw someone unusual at the gym. He openly read a hardcover book in the public bath. He sat up to his waist in water, and he absorbed himself in his book. He had an odd method, though.

Perhaps I ought to explain his unusual sitting position first. The bookworm sat while leaning against the corner of the bath, so the tub's edges extended to his left and right. A dry washbowl sat on the left edge. He had placed the book in the washbowl to keep it dry, and he held the pages open with one hand.

"Aha! The book won't get wet like that."

The covers peeked over the bowl's edges a little because the book was slightly too big. It looked kind of cute.

"But how will he turn the pages?" I wondered while I continued to observe him.

He had placed a towel on the right edge of the tub. The fellow put his wet hand on the towel to absorb the water. He turned the page with the dried hand after a while.

"Aha! Got it!"

The book wouldn't get wet that way. He looked skilled... he's probably a pro at this. He's a man in a bath (Furo) who reads (Hon) like a professional (Puro)... a Furo Hon Puro!

He must really love reading. Or does he simply enjoy reading in the bath? A resourceful idea can change a person's outlook, after all.

Then I got an idea. If I wrote my blog (Buloggu) in the bath (Furo), I would write a bath blog... a Frog (Furoggu)!

What would you think of that?

The gym had changed its lobby decoration from pumpkins to a Christmas tree. Christmas approaches at a breakneck speed.

I saw a young woman walking toward me while I traversed the long passage on my way home. She looked like she was in her twenties. Something about her seemed strange... something just wasn't right....

"What is it, I wonder?"

I looked at her feet. A black shadow clung to her ankle... no, wait... it clung to both ankles. I looked more closely and saw that multiple black shadows moved rhythmically in circles, according to the movement of her feet.

What are those? Some kind of spherical, amorphous creatures?

I finally understood what they were when she passed by. Thin strings anchored pom-pom decorations to each side of her boots. The fist-sized pom-poms spun round and round with each step.

She had two pom-poms per leg, so with two legs that made four. Four pom-poms turned as she walked.

In a way, they kind of resembled the old-fashion ball-and-chain fetters attached to prisoners and to slave laborers in ancient Rome.

She walked with a sprightly pace, spinning her steel balls round and round. She would never have associated her decorations with fetters.

Her back shrank into the distance.

How many fetters clank around my feet? I can only say with certainty that age latches more of them onto me. No adult lives without fetters.

I would like to spin my fetters as easily as she did, like velvet balloons.