#like YEAH its from recovering from surgery and not being able to do shit and also being on tpn

[itsscromp]

Jaime Reyes/blue beetle x reader platonic

Welcome to another blue beetle fic, It's closer and closer by the minute. Even though I have to wait an extra month as it doesn't release in Australia until September lol. But for this fic, if anyone has seen Homecoming, you'll get the idea ;) word count:849

Jaime, Your best friend, The freaking Blue Beetle !!!, holy shit. When you first found out he was Blue beetle when he rescued you from coyote, You had to calm yourself and not go full nerd. He did just save you, But once you recovered and went back to school.

"Jaime, we gotta talk" You had to whisper so that people didn't know he was Blue beetle.

"y/n I know but please not right here"

"I know I know but..." He was right you had to keep quiet but you had a million questions and zero answers.

During different points of the day you asked a question relating to blue beetle.

"Can you summon an army of beetles ??"

"No"

"Is the amour titanium or something ??"

"No, it's extra terrestrial"

"Ok ok... Is the suit fart proof ??"

"What kind of question is that ??"

After school Jaime decided to show you the powers of blue beetle

"Ok Y/n, follow me. I'll show my powers. Just please no more questions"

"Alright alright."

Jaime then brought Y/n to a rural area just near the edge of El Paso to make sure no one see's his identity.

"Ok before I show you my powers. There's one thing you gotta see."

He turned around and lifted his shirt

"What are you do.. OH MY GOD !!"

His back revealing the scarab, wedged right into his back. No surgery seems to be getting that off anytime soon

"I know, it took me a while to come to terms with it as well"

Their was silence for a bit.

"Look I trust y/n ok, they won't reveal my identity ok ??"

"Uhhh, who are you talking too ??"

Jaime sighed, It looked like he was talking to himself.

"Its the scarab, I don't know how but it seems I can only hear it and talk to it"

"That's freaky but awesome."

"It is, but It's like almost being nagged by Mom."

Quiet again

"Look scarab just trust y/n ok ??"

It would take some getting used too to see Jaime talk to scarab.

"Anyway, Now my powers, with them, I can be able to summon anything just by thinking to scarab what I want."

"Wow, that's so cool !!" Y/n was smiling wide.

"Alright, so the first thing... the armour. Originally I could only do it when I was in danger. But I figured out how to summon it at will."

Then Jaime stood there, shutting his eyes. Withing seconds. the blue beetle armour started to take over him, the pincers popping out, his face then turning into a mask, his eyes glowing yellow.

"Pretty cool right ??"

"Oh my... HOLY SHIT !!!" you were bouncing from pure excitment.

"That was awesome !!"

Jaime couldn't help but smile under the mask from your excitement.

"You ain't seen nothing yet amigo."

*queue sword*

"Final fantasy fan I see."

"What the buster sword is a classic."

"OK what else can you do ??"

Jaime then summoned arm cannons, his hands melting and reshaping into cannons.

"Hell yeah !!, these bad boys are my favourite"

"Woah !!, ok uuh, test it on that boulder"

"Say no more"

Jaime then aimed at the boulder and with one blast the boulder was completely destroyed. But as Y/n was still in awe from it they didn't see a big chunk of the boulder falling to your direction.

"Jaime the boulder, it's gonna crush y/n !!" The Scarab warned him, Jaime quickly then pushed Y/n out of the way and caught the boulder with his bare hands, Struggling for a bit before tossing it away from harms reach.

"Are you ok y/n ??"

"Holy... You. Have. SUPER STRENGTH !!!!!"

Jaime started smiling again before the mask disintegrated revealing his face again.

"That is the power of the blue beetle y/n"

"This is awesome !!"

"But y/n look, real talk here buddy. While yes this is awesome to see, you can't go telling anyone about this, not even your dad or my family. Only you know about this." He took your hand and squeezed it, in a way of seriousness. "Can you promise to keep this secret for me ok ??"

Your smile faded slightly knowing the seriousness of the cause, You squeezed his hand back. "I promise Jaime, I promise."

"Thank you y/n" He smiled and hugged you tightly. "Your a great friend you know that ??"

"Can say the same to you" You smiled as you hugged him back

Jaime saw the sun setting before realizing he's been out all afternoon.

"Oh mierda, I gotta get home before mom kills me, I'll see you at school tomorrow ok y/n ??"

"Shoot I should get home too" You saw a bus stop and had some money, so you then went to the stop.

"See you tomorrow Jaime !!!"

Jaime waved goodbye before grabbing his backpack and activating flight mode, zooming back home.

You smiled as soon as you saw him fly off, Your best friend was a superhero. A freaking superhero. El Paso was in safe hands with Blue Beetle.

Taglist:@callofdudes

[notokayjuslikefuckinmcr]

looking at old body checks while trying to recover is like "what the fuck i looked so unhealthy" while also being like "damn,,,, kinda miss that"

bitch no you dont you were so fucking sick and felt like shit constantly pls just continue recovery i dont wanna relapse again,,,

[sunaswife]

𝕻𝖗𝖔𝖌𝖗𝖆𝖒𝖒𝖊𝖉 𝖋𝖔𝖗 𝖍𝖎𝖒

Shigaraki X f! Reader

Warnings: 18+, NSFW, brainwashed/ programmed reader, implied kidnapping, Dom/sub, use of the word ‘pet’ and ‘master’, first time sex, uh..does this count as yandere..? Idk lol

🔪: this is like my second time writing smut so I’m sorry if it’s bad 🙇‍♀️ plz don’t spank me. N E Wayz I dedicate this fic to @aoi-turtle 🖤 and Any other shiggy whores out there

Edit: I FORGOT TO TAG @dinablossom and @toworuu IM SO SORRY BSVAKAGSJA

Summary: Imagine being programmed to be the leagues healer but also Shigaraki’s little cum bucket

♡︎☠︎︎♡︎☠︎︎♡︎☠︎︎♡︎☠︎︎♡︎☠︎︎♡︎☠︎︎♡︎☠︎︎♡︎☠︎︎♡︎☠︎︎♡︎☠︎︎♡︎☠︎︎♡︎☠︎︎♡︎☠︎︎

“Master what is the meaning of this.” Shigaraki looked at the television screen as he scratched his neck. “I took her quirk and made it a thousand times better.” He said simply. “Tomura shigaraki where should I place her?” Kurogiri asked. “Anywhere. I don’t care. I just don’t understand why you brought a stupid hero here.” He said annoyed.

“Now now—“ “Shut up and put her somewhere out of my sight!” Tomura demanded and Kurogiri sighed and carried your body to the spare room by shigaraki’s private quarters. You looked dead, you were exhausted, traumatized, in shock.

You were frozen. Your eyes stayed open, unblinking as you stared at the ceiling. It looked as if you were dead. But your body is warm and you were breathing, you’re alive and you’ll recover quick. Thanks to the quirk All for One fixed for you.

Dabi smirked at your ruined form. Spinner hid his rosy cheeks, you were a cute one. Toga was excited to have another girl in the league she talked with Twice about all the fun things you two could do together. Whether it be painting your nails, doing your hair, torturing someone, or making them bleed. She was excited.

“What’s so good about her quirk that you needed it.” Shigaraki asked. “It’s come to my attention that the league has been missing an important puzzle piece.” He started off. “Yeah? What’s that?” The light blue haired man asked. He was beyond ticked off to have a hero here. “She’s not a hero. She was training under UA’s school nurse. But she fell into the hero course for recovery and first aid training.” He said and everyone stayed silent and patiently listened to the brain behind the league.

“Her quirk is pyrokinetic regeneration. She manipulates fire with the energy of the person who needs healing and together she heals with so called fire. Her quirk was small, only a few cuts a bruises here and there could she heal. But I added cell regeneration so she can even fix up deep wounds that could need surgery in a matter of days instead of months.”

“Sounds amazing! No she could use her fire against us!” Twice said and Toga nodded. “She won’t. Her fire doesn’t burn unless you’re hurt.” Kurogiri returned. “But she’s still a hero brat so wouldn’t she try to resist?” Dabi asked. “I don’t know but let me try and see!” Toga giggled and pulled out a knife she easily slit her wrist and skipped her way to your new room.

Out of curiosity the other members followed suit. Shigaraki first, he wanted to see if you were truly useful if not then he’d disintegrate you right here and now. “Hi hi new friend! My name is Toga!” The psychotic girl giggle as her blood dripped all over the floor. You looked up slowly from your spot on the bed. “H-hi...T-toga..” your voice was low. “Kurogiri Can you bring her some water?” Toga asked and he left and came back in the blink of an eye.

Your hands were shaking for the cup of water but Toga held it back, away from you. “If you want the water then heal my wrist first.” She said sweetly with a giggle. “Heal your wrist?” You whispered and she nodded. “O-okay..” you stuttered and you slowly removed the blanket from your lap. You stood up with wobbly legs to go to the girl but you fell. The chain on your ankle pulled you back. You winced and looked at her, pleading for her to come to you. She asked if you were okay and when you responded she shoved her bloody arm to your face. “Take a deep breath. This may sting...” you started and a small green flame came upon your hand. You rubbed the flame over both of your hands like you were putting on lotion, finally when the flames covered both hands you pressed hard on her wrist. She winced, “ow ow ow.” She whimpered, you removed your hands and everyone stared at the flame around her whole wrist. “Give it thirty seconds....or not...” you said as you stared wide eyed at her already healed cut. It was barley a touch and it’s gone now. “Wow. No scar!” She giggled and turned to show the guys. “Wow stab me next, please don’t or else I’ll bite ya!” Twice said and you reached for the water. “Interesting.” Shigaraki mumbled with a small squint. Kurogiri looked over and hoped he wouldn’t do anything bad to you.

“Shows over. She needs her rest.” Kurogiri said and everyone left one by one. Toga gave her a hug and wished for you both to be the best of friends and she skipped away. “Tomura Shigaraki. What are you thinking?” Kurogiri asked as Shigaraki began to walk into your room. “Nothing that concerns you.” He spat and slammed the door. Kurogiri sighed but returned to the bar nonetheless.

“Do you know who I am?” Shigaraki asked, “Yes you’re the leader of the league of villains, You’re name is Tomura Shigaraki and your quirk is decay—“ “that’s enough!” He raised his voice and looked at you with wide eyes.

You looked so sad and you glanced down at your cup. “Mr. shigaraki I know I don’t usually talk this much. I’ve always been the quiet type. I think whoever kidnapped me gave me a huge sense of knowledge. I know the league is bad but I don’t care about the heroes anymore and I don’t know why. I know everything about you guys, your true identity, your quirks, your past. And when I see you I—“ you quickly stopped yourself.

Shigaraki raised a brow. “You what?” He asked curiously. “N-nothing. Just forget it.” You answered and he growled. “Answer me now before I kill you.” He said and your legs subconsciously clenched together. You stayed quiet and your chest rose and fell a little more quickly. Why was this feeling in your chest when this killer, this man child looked at you? What exactly did the man he calls master do to you?

Before you knew it he gripped your chin and lifted it harshly so you could look at his wrinkly red eyes. Even though he looks like a bum he smelled nice and clean. A hand was covering his face and you slowly lifted your hand to touch it and his other hand grabbed your wrist. “What the fuck are you doing? Do you have a death wish you fucking idiot?” He growled and you gulped. “C-can i see your face?” You asked and he tilted his head confused.

“No. Answer my question-“ before you both knew it, as if your body had a mind of its own you tackled shigaraki down and you snatched the hand off his face. His hand quickly wrapped around your neck and arm and you pressed your lips against his. He halted his finger from pressing against your neck. He was beyond confused.

“If only tomura finished listening to what i had to say.” All for one chuckled loudly. You both were able to faintly hear the television from down the hall. “He would know that I managed to change y/N’s desires and whole way of thinking. She’s now with the league of Villains and she’s in love with its leader, Tomura Shigaraki. Consider it a present and motivation for the future of the league.” You both heard and you pulled away from him. “I’m sorry. I should have asked.” You said lowly. He stood there stunned and silent.

He slowly sat up and looked at your figure. “So you were brainwashed like my Nomu.” He hummed and took a few steps back. He noticed how you crawled closer to him but the chain was keeping you away.

“Who do you love?”

“You.”

“Who do you belong to?”

“You.”

“Who’s your master?”

“Tomura Shigaraki.”

You said and he smirked. He was gonna have fun with you. “At least master was kind enough to give me a beauty.” He said as he held on to the chains. “Don’t freak out.” He warned and you nodded. He disintegrated the chain around your ankle and he pulled you by the arm. You were wearing an ugly hospital gown and you were barefoot. You couldn’t help but shiver. He went next door to his room and he shoved you in and slammed the door. You nearly tripped over the mess and you turned to look at shiggy. “Why are you just standing there?” He asked, “You haven’t given me orders.” You deadpanned. “You can’t think for yourself?” He questioned. “No i can but I Don’t want to upset you.” You replied.

“Fine then clean this shit up.” He referred to his very very messy room. You nodded and began to lift up a piece of trash but he pulled you away. “Change first.” He said and handed you a black hoodie. “Do you have a bathroom?” You asked. “No change here.” He said and you nodded. You turned so your back was facing him and carefully began to take off the gown, leaving you completely bare and Shigaraki couldn’t help but look.

Your skin was so beautiful and looked so soft. He saw as you carefully put on his hoodie and it completely engulfed you. It reached to your mid thigh. You slowly turned to look at him with rosy cheeks. The hoodie smelled just like him. “Tomura—“ “It’s master to you.” He Interrupted and you nodded, subconsciously squeezing your thighs together once more. “Sorry...m-master.” You said and played with the hem of his hoodie.

“Master..can I have some underwear too...? I feel weird, when I’m bare underneath..” you asked. “No, continue cleaning my room.” He answered coldly and sat on his gaming chair. He turned on his console and began playing whatever game he had.

You sighed and you couldn’t help but admire his gorgeous yet scarred face and his beautiful long fingers. In an instant he can kill you, but if you’re good..then he might even reward you. If you were to die, I’d rather be in the hands of your master than anyone else.

You quickly began you pick up the instant ramen bowls and bags of chips. You separated recycling and trash. You even managed to pick up all his dirty clothes and put it in the hamper in less than an hour. Tomura was stunned, one minute he can barley walk in, the next It’s almost spotless. He saw you from the corner of his eye, you were folding his clothes that practically had the same color scheme.

“Can i go through your drawers to put your clothes away..?” You finally spoke up. “Yeah it’s whatever. I don’t care.” He mumbled and returned to the screen. “Ugh stupid game!” He huffed and began pressing the controller more furiously. You chuckled and thought that it was so cute and adorable when he was frustrated.

You went to his California king sized bed and began to fix the sheets and make his bed. Since it was so huge, you had to climb on to properly fix it. You were completely in your own world when Shigaraki turned and saw your wet cunt on display in all it’s glory. Ever since he saw you he couldn’t help but feel that urge to take you. His resistance was getting to him and now he wanted to give in to his urges even more. He was too distracted that he lost the fucking game and he growled and disintegrated the controller. That was his own form of rage quitting.

You heard his sound of frustration so when you turned you expected him to be in the same chair uttering bullshit, but you were shocked when you felt your hips being pulled back. Your cunt was touching his pants, but you can feel his bulge. “Um..master..I—“

“Shut up.” He said and reached for your neck. He pulled you back to him and wrapped his other arm around your waist, hovering your aching clit. “This is whats gonna happen.” He started off and you nodded. “I’m going to fuck you. And you’re going to like it. Okay?”

“I understand.” You said softly, you felt his hands slowly lift up the hoodie just a bit to get a better view of your ass. You couldn’t help but feel slightly embarrassed. “I know I’m probably not your dream girl but I promise to be a good girl, master..” your voice shook. He tilted his head, were you getting insecure?

“No pet, you’re perfect to me.” He assured and you could hear his belt jingle as he took it off. “You seem pretty wet already, pet. Since how long have you been like this?” He asked as he got out of his jeans. He slowly open your cheeks to reveal your little pussy clenching around nothing, how cute. “Since I saw you..” you mumbled. He smirked and leaned down. He immediately began to eat out your cunt causing you to gasp in shock and grip the sheets. Your chest layed roughly against the bed as your ass stood proud in the air for the leader of the league of villains to enjoy.

“Fuck—“ you moaned and you felt a slap on your ass. You slightly jumped released a small yelp. “Watch your language.” He growled from your pussy. “Yes master.” You whimpered and he slowly began to rub his thumb on your other hole. Your small moans filled the room and he easily slipped his middle finger in you. You squeezed around him so deliciously, he couldn’t help but wished his cock was inside.

This has never happened to him before, this feeling in his chest. Someone that loves him and will obey his every command. You’re so beautiful as well, and your sounds. Your moans and whimpers, in all honesty he jut wanted to get himself off. But after hearing you and seeing you. He wants to make sure you have pleasure as well.

He continued pumping his finger in and out of your slick walls and your voice started getting slightly higher. “Master...I—I’m gonna cum...”you panted and your toes began to curl. “It’s okay, cum for me, pet. You’ve been a good girl.” He said softly and he felt you clench around his finger. When you came he slowly removed his finger and examined it. You must be new to is if you could get off with just one of his long fingers.

You layed on the bed a bit tired, not paying attention to your master who had tasted your cum on his finger. It was delicious and he wanted another taste. When you felt a lick on your cunt again you immediately shivered and clenched your thighs. “Hold still I just wanna taste some cum.” Shigaraki huffed and he pulled your thighs apart. You were pretty sensitive but you obeyed nonetheless.

You moans began to fill the room once more and before you could finish and cum again he pulled away. You automatically whimpered and turned to give your master puppy dog eyes. “I would let you cum again, but my cock is so fucking hard I don’t think I can wait another minute.” he said and began to pull down his boxers.

Before you could get back in position, which freaking hurt, he flipped you over on your back and you made a small oof noise. You looked up to See shigaraki focused on his cock, he was rubbing himself up and down your slit to use your cum as lube. “Alright I’m going in.” He announced and slowly pushed his rather large member inside your tint cunt. You immediately yelped and held on to his biceps. “M-master wait—it hurts..” you pleaded and Tomura finally looked up at your face.

He loves inflicting pain, he loves watching people’s painful expressions when they’re hurt or when they’re gonna die. Chisaki’s face was so amusing. But when he saw yours, his heart shattered and he didn’t want to hurt you at all. You’ve been nothing but good to him, he doesn’t want to hurt his little toy. “I’m sorry.” He apologized, “it’s okay..” you sniffled. After a minute of him being patient you gave him a nod and he continued to slowly bottom out.

You both released a moan when he was all the way in. You both have never felt anything like this before. “Can I start moving?” Shigaraki asked you as he brushed way the hair from your face. You nodded and he pulled almost all the way out and he slammed back in. Your little gasps and moans came back which made shigaraki feel at ease. You can clearly hear your slick with every thrust and it was music to his ears.

“I’ve been neglecting these.” He grunted and lifted his hoodie over your chest. Finally he was able to see your beautiful soft breasts bouncing with each thrust. “Fuck you’re so beautiful.” He moaned and immediately lowered his mouth to one of your nipples. You squealed and your back arched and he pushed you down. “Master...” you moaned softly. His tongue swirled around your hardened bud and your fingers tangled in his light blue hair. Two of his fingers pinched your other nipple and he lightly bit the nipple in his mouth.

“I think I-I’m close—“ you gasped and he removed his mouth. His thrusts decreased in speed but they became harder. He had a stupid smirk on his face and your eyes widened when he wrapped his hand around your throat. “Hold it until I say so.” He demanded and you muttered a weak yes. He felt how your gummy walls squeezed against his large dick, he was getting close too. “Fuck Fuck Fuck.” He groaned with his head tilted back and your mouth watered at the sight. Why is he so fucking handsome?

He could feel himself getting closer to his climax so he rubbed his thumb on you clit while increasing his pace once more, causing you to be even louder than before. Everyone in the bar could hear and a certain fire villian grumbled in annoyance. “Master I can’t hold it anymore!” You screamed. “Then cum my stupid little pet. Cum all over my cock like a good girl.” He grunted and bit his lip at the sight of your sweaty body. Your bouncing breasts, crazy hair, your adorable ahego face, your twitching legs and finally your grip on his biceps. You were so prefect and so good to him and only him.

When you came you felt his cum shoot inside you as well causing you to gasp at the delicious feeling. Tomura rested his head on your shoulder and tried catching his breath. You couldn’t help but smile and blush at the closeness. You slowly wrapped your arms around him and you gave his shoulder a kiss causing him to freeze. “I love you master, thank you for making me feel good.” You said softly. He chuckled and pulled you closer, “I love you too.”

I wanna write a part 2 of Shiggy finding out his little toy is being used by a certain fire boy 👀

[comfyswitcherblanketfort]

Wash Day

Yall I just really want Trisskel to be a solid couple from like, day one and be happy and in love and hhhnnngggg. I have feelings. (specifically Netflix Triss and Game Eskel) 

Summary: Modern AU Eskel helps Triss with wash day when she cant use her arms. 

Warnings: Mentions of burn injuries and burns in healing process, nothing gorey, just the mention of scabs, temporary dependency, dealing with the shitty mental part of recovering from major injuries/surgeries - not fucking bathing, eskel is not flexible and tries so hard to do things right. bless, lol swearing as is usual

I’d like to put a little disclaimer that I did a bunch of natural hair care research for this but I have no experience save from helping my friend diffuse her hair before class. 

________________

Triss groaned and tossed her phone to the other end of the couch she was perched on, wiping her one good hand over her face. Her burns over her chest still weren’t allowing her much range of motion with her right arm and her hair was starting to drive her absolutely insane. Yennefer was going to come over and help with wash day, but Ciri got in a fight at school, leaving Triss to sit with an itchy, ratted, and, frankly, horrendous head of hair. 

She leaned her head back against the arm of the couch and sighed, not even able to adjust the bun Eskel had helped her with that morning. 

Speaking of…

She scooted over the couch to pick up her phone, tapping the little call icon under his nickname, “Hey, Yen can’t come over tonight. No need to pick up the wine,” she sighed. 

“Are you sure? Nothing wrong with a little treat, babe.” 

“I’m sure. It was more for her efforts than my treat anyway.”

“If you say so… How are you feeling?”

“Less shit than this morning. I’m just tired,” she didn’t add the feeling of hopelessness that went along with not even being able to bathe on her own. He worried enough for the both of them and then some. 

“I’m picking up the good wine. I’ve got one more client then I’m done. Maybe take a nap?”

“Skel…”

“I will spoil you if I want to. Oh! Look! There’s my 3:30! Bye Bug! Love you!” he hung up on her before she could protest.

She rolled her eyes as she lowered the phone into her lap, smiling a little despite her annoyance. 

Gingerly, she made her way to their bedroom and laid down, running the risk of taking out the bun to lay comfortably. She turned on a podcast she told Jask she’d listen to and hoped to zone out at the least, if not actually sleep. 

-

Triss was woken by Eskel stomping in their front door and dropping his gym bag with a dramatic thud. A few moments later she could hear grocery bags settling on the kitchen counter, the distinct sound of wine bottles bumping together reminding her what he probably had planned. 

She ever so slowly tipped over and pushed herself up with her left hand, catching a horrifying full-body reflection in the mirrored closet doors. 

The scabs and little spots that were still bandaged she was starting to get used to, but the rest of her? Looking at herself in sweats that hadn’t been changed in two days, a summer tank top with no bra and coffee stains, and mismatching fuzzy christmas socks was… difficult. Her hair was wild, all the curls stretched out and sticking together in big frizzy clumps that stuck out at odd angles. 

She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. It had only been four weeks. No one was going to be back to normal after four weeks. Her body was using all its energy to heal, not look put together.

Regardless of her efforts she felt the tears well up in her eyes and her breath hitch with the effort of holding them back. 

It still fucking sucked.

Eskel’s soft touch on her thigh made her jump, “Is it hurting again?”

She shook her head, opening her eyes to see him knelt in front of her with his eyebrows drawn up in worry, “No. I’m okay,” she whispered, pulling herself together and resting her hand over his. 

Eskel tilted his head, “Then what’s wrong?”

“I… I look like I fell down the garbage chute,” she laughed. It wasn’t her usual, musical laugh, though. She laughed because she knew, in the grand scheme of things, it was ridiculous. It felt stupid to be worried about how she looked when she’d lived and, well, laughing was better than more tears.

“You’re always lovely to me,” Eskel hummed, brushing her tears away with the back of his knuckles.

She leaned into his touch and took a steadying breath, “I just don’t feel like me.”

He stretched up to kiss her forehead, “I’m sorry, Bug.”

She just shrugged and squeezed his hand. 

“Yen called. I got a very long lecture on wash day and firm orders to help you wash and deep condition your hair. If you’re feeling up to it,” Eskel flashed that crooked grin she could never resist and she shrugged, a small smile tugging at the corners of her lips. 

“Are you prepared to follow instructions?” she teased. 

“Babe,” he raised one eyebrow, “the only instructions I don’t follow are on Top Ramen packs.”

-

Eskel seemed to have confused ‘instruction’ with ‘directions’.

“I swear to God, Eskel. You don’t have to read the ‘how to use’ blurb,” Triss groaned, sitting on a kitchen chair they’d moved into the bathroom with dripping wet hair, “Just section off my hair and do what I tell you.” 

“But I don’t want to use too much,” he protested, “This says to use one tablespoon!”

“Yeah! For natural blondes! I have completely different hair and know what I’m doing. Use half the bottle! I don’t care! Just get it fucking clean!” 

Eskel rested his hand on her good shoulder and gave her an apologetic look in the mirror, “I’m sorry. How many sections do you want?” 

“I- it’s not a number. You just- kneel down for me I’ll show you,” she pointed at the floor next to her and sighed, missing Yen more than ever. She drew little lines with her nails through Eskel’s hair as she explained just how to scrub while making the least amount of tangles possible. He watched her in the mirror and pointed to the points on her scalp she was talking about with a look of serious concentration. 

It was cute. Even if he was a little inflexible he really did want to do a good job. 

Conditioner was easier, even combing out the tangles went fairly smooth. They took a break and made dinner, breaking open the good wine. 

Just having her hair down and somewhat bouncy again made Triss feel a million times better. The sweats were exchanged for yoga pants and the tank top for one of Eskel’s sweaters too. It almost felt normal. 

They ate ice cream while he worked the deep conditioning mask through her hair. 

“You sure I’m not using too much?” he asked, leaning over her shoulder to take the bite she held up for him, nice and small so he didn’t get a brain freeze. 

“Fbe moreb fbe bedder,” she tried speaking around a giant bite of ice cream, giggling at the face of confusion he made with the spoon still sticking out of his mouth. 

She swallowed and scrunched her nose at the light brain freeze, “The more, the better. We’ll rinse it out in the morning and I don’t want any dry spots.”

He nodded and waited for her to take the spoon back before getting back to work, “Yes ma’am.” 

“Mmm, I like that.” 

Eskel rolled his eyes as she let down a new section, “Oh do you, now? I had no idea.” 

“Mhm!” she nodded with a proud smile, taking another bite of ice cream and earning a chuckle from him. 

She walked him through a couple rough twists and adjusting the plastic soaking cap before attempting to explain how to tie a headscarf. He was… truly awful. Somehow she ended up almost blindfolded before she just gave up and found him a video to follow. It took him a few tries, but eventually he got it the right level of snug. I 

She tried to tilt her head back to look at him but that pulled at some of her new scar tissue, so she tried another angle and another before she huffed and resorted to standing up to look at him, “Thank you Skel.”

“No problem, Bug,” he hummed, wrapping his arms around her waist and kissing her nose. 

Triss laid her head on his chest, the perfect height for him to rest his chin on top of her head, “No, I mean it. It… helps. A lot.”

He rubbed soothing circles over her back, swaying them slightly, “I’m just glad I could do something…” he took a breath like he wanted to say something more but settled for pressing a kiss to the sloppily tied scarf. She hummed and leaned into him, snaking her hands around his hips and up under his shirt to rest over his back dimples. 

Triss could have stayed there forever. 

[starr-fall-knight-rise]

HASO, “Freak of Nature.”

A continuation from yesterday. I hope you all enjoy, and I hope you enjoy the setup for some other stories I am planning on doing :)

Have a good day!

Breaking News

The Galaxy is left stunned after the events of late yesterday evening, when a single armed shooter appeared from the crowd and fired on UNSC leader and cultural icon Admiral Vir during a routine press conference given at UNSC headquarters Fort Harmony on the eastern Mericandian coast. Reports describe the event as happening midway through Admiral Vir’s address as the single, hooded female pushed through the crowd and drew a handgun on the Admiral firing once before fleeing into the crowd. She was apprehended by armed security agents only moments later as she tried to flee the scene. On scene witnesses report that an accompanying marine tackled Admiral Vir to the ground just as the shot was fired.

 In a statement made early this morning by Admiral Vir  he reports that, “Thanks to the brave actions of Corporal Angel Ramirez I am alive and unharmed.” Corporal Angel Ramirez is a decorated veteren of the UNSC deep space division and served his first tour aboard the UNSC Enterprise on its maiden voyage. Since then he has served under Admiral Vir on both the UNSC Harbinger and most recently the Omen distinguishing himself in combat during the Burg war and the Kree engagement. Our sources report that Corporal Ramirez was once an up and coming champion in the Mericandian winter Olympic ice skating team before joining the marines. 

Reports say that the corporal came out of surgery early this morning and is in stable but critical condition. 

The only question remains is who would attempt an assasination on such a beloved cultural icon. More on that with our crime reporter Jim Shaw.

Thank you, Emily, early this morning we received reports from Fort harmony officials that the name and identity of the shooter is 37 year old Adrea Halen member of a traditionalist leaning moderate group the Hunt Party, who have condemned Admiral Vir in the past for his support of legalizing extrial relationships. President Hunt, leader of the hunt Party and CEO of Hunt Metals said in a statement today. “Our party had nothing to do with Ms. Halen’s actions, while we disagree with Admiral Vir on some fundamentals of government, we would never attempt to silence him through violence. At the end of the day Admiral Vir has done far more good than he has bad and no man deserves to die due to his political views. What Ms halen has done is condemnable, and the party does not support her actions.”

Further comment was withheld until a later date. As of yet police have been unable to determine if she acted alone or with the assistance of the group. Police chief Henry Winzer added in his statement today, “Ms. Halen has not, as of yet, divulged her motives behind the shooting, however based on preliminary evidence of the scene it seems as if these were the actions of a woman acting alone. Detectives have been unable to find any correspondence between her and a third party and even her husband had been out of the country for the past few months.”

Her motive remains, as of yet, unknown. There is evidence of a radicalized political view since she did attempt and target Admiral Vir, and some of her personal social media content has been leaked to the public reporting her dissatisfaction with going the GA and her open disgust for extrial activities especially in regards her oldest son who was in a relationship with a Finnari before moving to Noctropolis. We have since been unable to contact him.

In the past Admiral Vir has been known as a great political proponent in favor of extrial relationships, and a non isolationist view having once said that, “Cooperation and companionship with the GA will be the bedrock of human expansion into space.” With the popularity of Admiral Vir as a cultural Icon, it can be said that his political views have been influential on the younger upcoming generations of today, while the older populace still remains wary of political involvement with extraterrestrial life. In oth-

Adam shut off the TV sinking back into one of the stiff plastic chairs that adorned the hospital waiting room. His eyes felt grainy and dry, and his head ached dully behind his eyes. Off in the corner of the room much of Ramirez’s family lay asleep on the plastic chairs including his father and otters who had arrived late last night. They had fallen asleep after a nurse ventured in a few hours to go to let them know that he was stable and alive. Adam himself had not been able to sleep thinking about his friend, replaying the moment over and over in his head wondering if there was something he could have done to prevent all of this from happening. But the more he thought the more he realized that it was probably unlikely. He might have been able to dive out of the way himself before the shot was fired, but Ramirez was already in motion before that.

He couldn’t have seen it coming, no one could have, and no one did.

Ramirez had just been the fastest.

He sunk back into his chair miserably and stared at the wall. There were no windows in this room, the guard detail had insisted upon it incase someone else tried for his life. It all seemed so strange to him. Why would anyone want to kill him? 

He knew the answer though, as much as he wanted to think he was just some nobody, he wasn’t anymore. He was… a political figure, someone who could influence what happened in the galaxy and there were plenty of people who weren’t bound to agree with him on a lot of things.

He just wondered why he hadn’t seen this coming sooner.

His implant buzzed, and he looked down to see that his mother was calling. Whoopse, she wasn’t going to be happy that she was just hearing about this over the news, but he knew he needed to talk to her. He stood and made his way into the hallway, where a protection detail eyed him hawkishly.

Closing the door behind him, so as not to disturb its sleeping occupants, he answered the call, speaking out loud as the implants in his throat and ear picked up the sound, “Hey, mom.” 

“Adam! Adam are you alright! I just saw the news.”

“Yeah, yea I’m ok.” He took a deep breath, “Sorry I didn’t call. It’s just been kinda hectic.”

“And you’re sure you’re ok?”

“Yeah, I mean, I feel like shit but no bullet wounds….” he trailed off 

There was silence for a moment, ‘I’m so sorry sweetheart, how is Ramirez?”

“Doctor’s haven’t given us all the details yet, but he's at least alive and survived surgery.”

“Thank goodness…. We owe that boy.”

“I know, mom…. I know.”

Just then he heard voices off down the hall and turned to see Dr. kill and Dr Katie approaching from the wings.

“Mom, I’ve gotta go, but I’ll call you as soon as I can, Ok?”

“Ok.” 

She let him go and he hung up as the two doctors approached.

“How is he!”

They motioned him into the room and he followed just as Ramirez’s family members were waking up.

Adam hovered near the door not entirely sure if he was supposed to be there. Ramirez’s mother sat up, “Is h ok!”

Dr. Kati and Dr Krill glanced at Adam. Adam realized with Dr. patient confidentiality, and it being family, he probably wasn’t supposed to be here. He went to step outside, but Ramirez’s abuela waved him back.

Ramirez an Dr Katie nodded.

The little alien stepped forward towards the family, “I have both good and bad news.”

The group waited with bated breath.

“THe good news is that your son made it through surgery. He is stable and recovering in the ICU.” he glanced over at Katie, “The bullet went in through his back, through his right kidney and perforated some of his lower bowl. We were able to fix the tears but the kidney…. Was not salvageable.”

The family glanced back and forth between each other, “That…. That’s not so bad though. He has two….”

Krill shifted slightly, “Well that is the remarkable thing and also the bad news but…. Your son only had one kidney. We wouldn’t have noticed it were it not for our imaging, but it seems he has lived with this defect his entire life without complication.”

Dr. Katie Cut in just then, “Since he was born with the defect, his body compensated. The kidney that was destroyed was much larger than average…” She trailed off 

The family members looked between each other, “So…. So what does this mean.”

“We have him on dialysis right now, and he is going to need a kidney transplant.” Dr. Katie folded her hands, “There are a few options, there is always the possibility of getting him a donor kidney or equally possible and more…. Advisable would be to have a kidney grown for him using his own stem cells, that way we can grow him one like the one he lost considering there is no way for us to give him two. If he were to get a donor kidney, he would have to undergo chronic gene therapy to avoid medications that would leave him immunocompromised. However in that case he would need to be medically discharged. If we were to grow him a new kidney, he would be able to return to his post without being discharged, but the cost is…. Admittedly much higher.”

The family glanced between each other their faces pulled into grimaces.

Adam knew their financial situation. He had heard stories about Ramirez growing up and knew enough to know that his family had never been well off. They had been close, his childhood had been excellent, but they had never been rich. Affording either of those options was going to be a stretch.

“Well we will have to talk about-”

“I’ll pay for it.”

The entire room turned to look at him.

“You-”

“I said I will pay for it. With the settlement for the court case, I can pay for it. He saved my life this is the least I can do, Please…”

His pleading was so plaintive that the family could hardly say no. He did have a point as well. Instead, he received an enthusiastic hug from Ramirez’s younger sister who clasped her arms around him and nearly snapped him in half with her strength. She was an olympic boxer after all, so he wasn’t surprised.

“Thank you thank you thank you.” She repeated.

Dr. Katie looked at him with a pointed expression, but she didn’t need to ask. He intended to pay for every last cent of Ramirez’s treatment even if he had to fight his abuela for it. He wasn’t entirely sure he’d win against her, but he would damn sure try if it meant doing something fo his friend.

He owed him after all.

And even if he didn’t Ramirez was his best friend. This wasn’t about owing him, this was about doing anything for someone he cared about.

Dr. Krill shifted in his place, “We will get the equipment ready and start later this week. I…. would be honored to perform the operation. I will be upfront with you and say that I am the universe's foremost surgeon, but I would also be the first Alien to perform a transplant”

“I of course, you saved his life last night-”

They seemed almost in shock. Everything was being paid for and the universe most renowned surgeon was practically begging to do it.

The only way this could have been better is if their son hadn’t been shot in the first place.

***

The steady beeping of the machine echoed around the room. Adam sat with one ankle crossed over a knee looking down at his implant and absently reading through that day’s news report as a soft whirring came from the machine just to his right. He wasn’ technically supposed to be here, but the doctors had made an exception for him and the family. On the other side of that a glass tube was busy growing an extra kidney. There was security outside the door and a doctor came in every few minutes to check on the kidney, and the man to which the kidney belonged.

Adam scrolled dow.

There was a shifting just to his side, and with relief Adam looked up to find Ramirez stirring. The man tried to open his eyes but squinted against the light and groaned raising one IV tethered hand to block the light.

Adam leaned over resting a hand on his arm, “Hey you’re finally awake.”

Ramirez cracked an eye at him and groaned.

“Come on ya freak wake up.”

Ramirez closed his eyes again, “Why…. When I wake up do I have to see your ugly ass.

Adam snorted, “How sweet, freak.”

“Freak, have you looked at yourself lately.”

“At least I was born with all my kidneys.”

Ramirez opened his eyes and frowned, “What?”

Adam smiled slightly, “Turns out your dumbass has lived his entire life with only one kidney. Congratulations, you are a freak of nature.”

“No shit, really? I had no idea.”

“We know, anyway the bullet sort of ruined it, so you have to get a new one. He pointed across the room to the glass tube and its slowly growing kidney which was no bigger than a jellybean right at that moment.”

Ramirez looked and frowned, “Ew, gross… wait who's paying for that,because I don’t think the military covers transplants.”

“It's taken care of.”

“By who.”

“By someone.”

“Someone who.”

“Someone who would rather remain unnamed.”

Ramirez looked at him,”It’s you isn't it.”

Adam sighed, “You saved my life, so shut up and let me buy you a new kidney. I owe you that much at least.”

“Fne, fine.”

There was a pause between them.

“I….. thank you, for saving my-”

“Dude don’t get all sappy and shit on me ok. You would have done it for me.” Adam went quiet still wishing to thank his friend but knowing Ramirez would never accept i.

Ramirez shifted to look at him, “So, you know why they tried to kill you?”

Adam shrugged, “Not really, the lady who did it has some political affiliations who don't tend to agree with me, but that connection doesn't seem to fit completely. Either that or she blames me for making her son an extrial in which case….. That hardly makes sense either.” he shrugged, “Either way she isn’t talking, and now I can’t go anywhere without five to six bodyguards spilling out my ass.”

Ramirez snorted, eyes closing, breathing deeply.

“You feeling ok.”

“Yeah…. I’m alright, just tired.”

“Then go back to sleep ya big idiot. Maybe if you’re a good boy santa will leave a kidney under your pillow.”

Ramirez let off a weak huff, “Didn’t know santa was a black market organ dealer.”

“He is this christmas, now shut up and go to sleep.” Ramirez didn’t argue with him beyond that point, and fell back asleep just as a nurse ws coming to check on him.

Adam was relieved. 

Ramirez was, hopefully, going to be ok.

Though what remained were far more questions than there were answers. 

[honey-dewey]

Wisdom Teeth Imagines

My sibling is having their wisdom teeth out tomorrow and I felt like writing wisdom teeth imagines because I dunno I was bored? This’ll focus more on Reader getting their wisdom teeth out, but who knows. Maybe I’ll do this again. 

Total Word Count: 2,988

Permanent Taglist: @phoenixhalliwell @star-wars-hell

Din Djarin:

Din watched as you stumbled a bit coming up the ramp into the Crest. You’d just had surgery to remove your wisdom teeth and if Din had known you’d be this high, he probably would’ve left you with Peli until the drugs wore off.

“Din,” you whined, reaching out and stumbling over your own two feet. Din caught you, carrying you to the cockpit. He’d set up a sleeping spot there, warm and cozy so he could keep an eye on you while you recovered.

You looked at him with wide eyes. “Din,” you said again, putting a hand slowly against your face. “Din!”

“Yes ner ka’ra?” Din said, crouching down so he was at your level.

“Can’t feel my face!” You said, voice overly worried. The cotton in your mouth and the numbness of your face give you a lisp, and Din couldn’t help but grin.

He smiled despite the helmet, putting a hand on the top of your head. “It’s okay, that’s normal. Lay back now, my star. That’s it, it’s time to sleep.”

You didn’t fight as you sunk into sleep, eyes flickering shut. Din took a minute to admire you, cotton stuffed cheeks and all, before he stood to sit in the pilot’s seat. He wanted to find somewhere safe where you could recover for a few days, at least.

Sorgan was a day’s trip out of the way, and Din set course for the backwater planet. He turned once the coordinates were set, looking at you.

Din sighed, sitting on the floor beside you. He’d gone through this years ago, and knew that what you’d need most was comforting company.

As you shifted in your sleep, he moved so you could use him as a pillow. While you slept, Din relaxed, his helmet off. You wouldn’t remember anything if you woke up, so what did it matter?

Your eyes cracked open and you grumbled. Din, above you, smoothed down your hair and smiled. You gasped softly. “Brown eyes,” you murmured.

Din chuckled. “Brown eyes,” he agreed. “Go back to sleep.”

“Okay Brown Eyes,” you said softly, rolling over and falling asleep once more.

Marcus Moreno:

(Side note! For more Marcus wisdom teeth shenanigans, go read When I’m Older and I’m Wiser.)

“Oh babe,” Marcus said, trying not to laugh as he walked into the operating room. You stared at him, wide eyed.

“Holy shit,” you slurred, still staring. “You’re hot.”

Marcus pressed his lips together and suppressed his laughter. “Thank you,” he said. “Are you ready to go home?”

You nodded, trying to stand and immediately falling into Marcus’s arms. “Are you single?” You asked as he carried you to the car.

“No, I’m not single. I’m actually engaged,” Marcus said, and you immediately started to sniffle. “What? What’s wrong? Does your mouth hurt?”

You shook your head, nearing tears. “Why aren’t you single?” You wailed as Marcus put you in the car. “This isn’t fair!”

Marcus’s worry melted away. “Oh, honey. No, hey, I’m engaged to you!”

Your eyes went wide as your tears stopped. “What?”

“Yeah,” Marcus said, showing you the ring on your hand. “I’m engaged to you.”

“Woah,” you breathed, watching his face as he buckled you in. “Damn, I hit the jackpot.”

Marcus had to turn away and take a few breaths so he didn’t start laughing. “Okay babe. Ready to go home?”

You nodded, leaning against the door. “Can I sleep?”

“Of course you can sleep,” Marcus said, getting into the car and kissing your temple. “Close your eyes, we’ll be home before you know it.”

“Okay,” you mumbled, looking down at your hand one last time and grinning. “I’m so lucky.”

Max Phillips:

“Head still hurt?”

You groaned in response.

Max chuckled softly. “I’ll take that as a yes,” he said. He’d been looking after you since you got your wisdom teeth out, and now that you weren’t high anymore, everything hurt.

“Wanna eat something?” Max asked, looking over at you. You were face down on the couch, breathing slowly through the pain. “We have ice cream.”

You nodded, mumbling something softly. Any normal person wouldn’t have been able to hear it, but Max was no normal person.

“Okay,” he said, standing and closing his book. “Vanilla it is.”

He made you a bowl of vanilla ice cream, grabbing himself a Max popsicle while he was in the freezer. Sucking on the popsicle and letting the metallic tang coat his senses, he handed you your bowl. You made a face at his blood popsicle, but didn’t say anything as you sat up and very slowly spooned ice cream into your mouth.

You’d eaten maybe five bites by the time Max had finished his popsicle.

“Oh for the love of god,” Max said softly, scooting closer and taking the ice cream from you. You whined, but he shook his head. “Open wide.”

You did so, opening your mouth as best you could. Max put the spoon in, and you swallowed the ice cream.

“Better?” He asked, spooning up another bite. “Probably faster.”

You stuck your middle finger up and Max and took the next bite of ice cream.

“Mhm,” Max hummed playfully. “If you’d let me turn you, you wouldn’t be in pain right now.”

“Fuck you Phillips.”

Max’s grin grew. “I’ll take you up on that,” he promised. “Once you get better.”

You groaned. Later, you’d punch him for that comment, but for now, you resigned yourself to being spoon fed by the world’s most annoying vampire.

Frankie ‘Catfish’ Morales:

“Okay Sparks, in the truck, there you go.” Frankie held your hands as you unsteadily got into his truck. He’d been the only one available at seven AM, so he’d driven you to your wisdom tooth appointment.

You hummed slowly, watching with unfocused eyes as Frankie got into the truck with you. “Fish?”

“What’s up Sparks?”

“I-“ you stopped abruptly as the truck growled to life. “Rumbly.”

Frankie put his phone on its holder and hit the record button on the camera. “Sparks. You okay?”

“The truck is purring!” You said, patting the dashboard. “Like a cat!”

“Like a cat,” Frankie agreed, driving out of the parking lot and across the street to the nearest fast food place. “You still want that milkshake?”

You nodded. “Cookie?”

“Oreo, if they’ve got it,” Frankie said, putting a hand on your shoulder as he pulled into the drive through line. “If they don’t, we’ll do vanilla, how’s that sound?”

“Okay.”

“Perfect,” Frankie said. “And then we have to get your pills, and then we can go home and take a long nap.”

You pouted. “Wanna nap now.”

Frankie smiled. “Go ahead. You’ve slept in this truck before.”

“Oh,” you said softly, leaning your head back and zoning out.

In a blink, almost five minutes had passed, and Frankie was pressing a cold milkshake into your hands. “Oreo, just like I promised.”

You looked down at the small cup in your hands and immediately looked up at Frankie with pure love in your eyes. “I love you.”

Frankie almost crashed the truck. “I’m sorry?”

“I love you so much,” you said again, scooting closer to Frankie and leaning your head against his shoulder. “Have for a looooong time. Napping.”

Frankie floundered as you fell asleep. He had no idea what to think. You were high as hell, but not entirely unreasonable. Was his massive crush actually reciprocated?

Deciding he’d wait until you woke, Frankie put an arm around your shoulders to steady you against his side and kissing the top of your head at a red light. “Sweet dreams.”

Jack ‘Whiskey’ Daniels:

“Jack?” Ginger said, poking her head into Jack’s office. “I’ve got them here.”

“Bring them in,” Jack said, standing.

Ginger wheeled a wheelchair in, you sitting in it. Your cheeks were swollen and your head was wobbly, but Jack expected that. He helped you up, kissing your forehead and scooping you into his arms to keep you off your unsteady feet.

“I got it,” he promised Ginger. “You don’t need to hover Ginge.”

Ginger left, leaving Jack to deposit you on his lap in his office chair. “Darlin’,” he said. “I got a meeting soon. Think you can behave?”

You nodded, cuddling up to Jack and promptly falling asleep.

You were awoken by the door opening. Champ walked in, looking over you curled up in Jack’s lap. Jack simply gestured to the chair opposite his. “Cosmopolitan had their wisdom teeth out today,” he explained as Champ sat down.

The meeting was boring. Boring enough for you to zone right back out, breathing Jack’s intoxicating whiskey and leather smell. You must’ve fallen asleep again, because one minute Champ was talking about the New York branch, and the next, he was standing and leaving.

“Naps?” You asked softly once the door closed.

Jack chuckled, carrying you to his couch. “Of course,” he said, kicking off his shoes and laying you down. He grabbed a blanket and lay beside you, lightly kissing your cheeks. “Love ya.”

“Love you too,” you mumbled, right before falling asleep yet again.

Ezra:

“I told you not to come,” Ezra said, reading his book while you put your face on his thighs and groaned loudly. “But no, you had to be stubborn.”

“Fuck off,” you mumbled into Ezra’s pants. “Didn’t hurt yesterday.”

Ezra rolled his eyes and flipped a page in his book. “Songbird, I love you, but you should’ve stayed home with Cee.”

“And let you come alone?” You said, rolling over so you were facing the ceiling. “I think not.”

“Then stop complaining.”

A throb of pain his your face and you winced, curling towards Ezra and whining. “Distract me?”

Ezra shut his book with a sigh. No matter how much you annoyed him, he loved you unconditionally. “Okay. How shall I distract you?”

Another worse throb, and your whines grew in volume. Your eyes screwed shut, muscles tensing. “Ezra!”

“Oh songbird,” Ezra said softly, leaning down to kiss your forehead. “Songbird I’m so sorry I can’t make the pain go away.” He pressed his ice cold hand against your cheek, hoping it would help with the pain. “Do you want medicine?”

“Took it already,” you said, leaning against Ezra’s hand.

Ezra smoothed his thumb over your cheekbone. “Ah. Apologies. There is nothing else I can do.”

You eventually fell asleep, somehow. When you woke, Ezra was in the kitchen, making a smoothie. The loud whirring of the blender woke you up and spurred you to your feet, head still aching something fierce.

“Songbird!” Ezra said upon seeing you awake. “You should be laying down.”

“Nah,” you said, sitting on the kitchen counter. “Can’t sleep. Blender’s too loud.”

Ezra sighed. “I made this for you,” he said, handing you a cup full of pink sludge.

Unable to use a straw, you grabbed a spoon and began to eat, humming around the frozen drink. “Damn Ez. This is good.”

Ezra smiled, kissing your temple. “Only the best for my songbird.”

Shane ‘Dio’ Morrissey:

Dio paced the waiting room, worry making his stomach twist. He was the only one here aside from the receptionist, who’d stopped giving him odd looks after the first twenty minutes. Dentist’s offices made him incredibly anxious, and the prospect of you having a full blown surgery right at this moment made him want to puke. But he had to be here. Had to be strong for you.

“Mr. Morrissey?”

Dio’s head snapped around. “Yes?”

The surgeon looked at him. “The procedure was a success and they’re waking up. Do you want to come get them?”

“Yeah,” Dio said, following the surgeon back and trying not to freak out.

“Dio!” You said happily upon seeing your goth boyfriend. You were in a wheelchair and had a very far away gleam to your eyes. “Dio!”

Dio sighed. “Hey. Feeling okay?”

You nodded. “I feel great,” you said loosely. “You don’t look okay.”

“Let’s just go,” Dio said tightly.

“Oh right,” you said, looking up at the nurse pushing your wheelchair. “He’s scared of the dentist.” You said it in a loud whisper, like you were trying to share a secret. The nurse smiled and looked at Dio.

“The anesthesia loosens the lips,” she said. “Try to keep an eye on them until it wears off.”

Dio nodded, just eager to leave.

You were high for another three hours, most of which were napped away in the safety of Dio’s apartment. He messed around in his spare room, which had been converted into a sewing room. He kept the door cracked open so he could see and hear you.

Eventually, you sat up, rubbing your eyes and poking your nose experimentally. “Huh.”

You stood, shuffling into Dio’s sewing room. “Dio?”

Dio turned, halfway through putting a new patch on his jacket. “You’re awake.”

“I am,” you agreed, holding your arms out. Dio stood and hugged you, his project abandoned on the table. “Sorry I made you go with me. I know you hate it a lot.”

“I didn’t mind,” Dio promised. “Not for you.”

You made a face, and Dio smiled. “Okay, maybe I minded a little bit.”

“That breaks your what? Ten year streak of not entering a dentist’s office?” You asked, pulling Dio into the living room and sitting on the couch. “That isn’t healthy.”

“Eleven,” Dio said, sitting next to you and pulling you close to his side. “And I know.”

You didn’t press further. Instead, you snuggled up to Dio’s side and yawned, wincing. “Ow.”

Dio pressed a kiss against your head. “Go back to sleep,” he said softly. “I’ll put on that documentary we were watching last night.”

You nodded, closing your eyes. You were asleep before the documentary even began.

Javier Peña:

Javier had seen some shit in his day, but watching you come out of surgery and go almost directly to work was one of the most ridiculous things he’d seen in a while.

“Go home!” He said for the eighth time, watching you rub your jaw. You’d napped off the drugs, but walked into work as soon as you were sober. For the past hour, you’d been suffering through work with what had to be a raging headache.

You rolled your eyes. “Javi, I’m busy.”

Javier stood, finally at the end of his rope. He scooped you up out of your chair and you squealed indignantly, thumping your fists on his back as he carried you out to his car. Steve gave you two a look as you exited the building, but didn’t try and stop Javier as he opened his car door.

“Stay,” he said firmly once he’d put you in the backseat. “I’m taking you home and you’re getting the appropriate amount of rest.”

You pouted, but your pounding head made you sit still while Javier drove you home. He watched you carefully as you set yourself up on the couch with soft foods and your phone nearby, and then you turned your eyes on him when he didn’t leave.

“You aren’t gonna go back to work?”

Javier shook his head, sitting on the couch with you. “I don’t trust you. So no, I’m gonna stay right here until you’re better.”

Your eyebrows went up. “Javi, that’ll be days!”

“I know,” Javier promised. “I’ve had my wisdom teeth out. Now, get some rest. I’ll run out later and pick up some pain meds for that headache you haven’t told me about yet.”

Another eye roll, and you were snuggling down into the safety of your blanket cocoon. Your head did really hurt.

The gentle sounds of Javier working, his typewriter balanced on his knees, lulled you into a gentle and well deserved sleep.

Maxwell Lord:

“Hey doll,” Max said, smiling as a nurse helped you out of the office. “How’re you feeling?”

You groaned, and Max laughed. “Oh really? C’mon, let’s get you home.”

You were mostly quiet on the ride home, head cradled by the car door as you napped. Max had expected this when he’d sent you into the office an hour ago to get your wisdom teeth out, and he was definitely prepared.

“Let’s get you in the house,” Max said, helping you up once you’d gotten home. Your legs were still wobbly, so Max basically carried you in and set you in the bed. Duchess looked up and meowed indignantly, but when she realized it was just you, she sniffed you over and plopped down at your side.

“Kitty,” you said softly, petting Duchess. She purred, rolling over and butting her head into your side.

Max smiled. “I’m going to grab ice for your face. Want anything else?”

You shrugged, engrossed in your actions of petting Duchess.

“Alright,” Max said, kissing your head.

When he came back, you were asleep.

Chuckling, Max put the ice bag back in the freezer and set his book on the bedside table. Duchess left, probably because you’d stopped petting her, and Max took her place, curled up at your side.

“Daddy?”

“Alistair,” Max said, looking over. “Hey.”

Alistair looked hesitantly at you. “Are they okay?”

Max nodded. “Of course. Just napping. Wanna stay with us? I was going to put on a movie.”

“Can we watch the Jungle Book?” Alistair asked eagerly, jumping up into the bed.

Max smiled. “Of course. Stay here, I’ll go get it.”

You woke up a while later to the singing monkey, blinking slowly and rolling towards Max’s warmth. “Max.”

“Good morning sleeping beauty,” Max said softly, kissing your forehead. “How was your nap?”

“Good,” you said, looking around and seeing Alistair curled up in the bed with you. “Whole family’s here.”

Max chuckled. “Duchess is even here,” he said, pointing to where Duchess was laying in her bed.

You leaned against the pillows. “Love you.”

“Love you too,” Max said. “Still wanna sleep?”

“Yeah,” you mumbled. “Wake me at dinner.”

Max pressed one more kiss to your head before you fell asleep once more.

[mst3kproject]

The Ape

In the vein of movies that should not be confused with eerily similar previous entries, The Ape is distinct from The Ape Man... but not by much.  Both feature a slumming horror superstar, glandular secretions, and a stupid gorilla suit.  All these things also showed up in early seasons of MST3K, of course, and The Ape Man also has a surprise bonus.  Apparently, the guy in the gorilla costume is none other than Crash Corrigan, of Undersea Kingdom!

Long ago, Dr. Adrien lost his daughter to polio, and ever since he's been obsessed with finding a cure.  That sounds pretty noble, but unfortunately, Adrien is a mad doctor, so the cure he comes up with requires killing healthy people to drain them of their cerebralspinal fluid!  In order not to arouse suspicion, he kills and skins a gorilla that escaped from a circus, and wears its hide when he murders people... you know, as one does. To nobody's surprise but his, he ends up getting shot, but hey, at least he cured beautiful young Frances' paralysis!

This is a weird, dumb movie but one thing I can say in its favour is that everybody seems to have given it a good try.  This material was far beneath Boris Karloff but he takes it seriously and actually gets a couple of decent moments, as does Maris Wrixton (who was also in The Face of Marble) as Frances.  Nobody else is even close to Karloff's level, being just bland 40's actors who talk too fast, but none of the main cast are phoning it in, either.

Conversely, the worst thing in the movie is its truly horrendous gorilla suit.  The puppet face shows the actor's eyes and can curl its lip, which is cool, though the features don't look very gorilla-ish.  The rest of the suit, however, is terrible. It's way too shaggy and in order to give it a gorilla-like silhouette, they stuck a big hunchback on it.  This might have worked if Corrigan had tried to walk on all fours like gorillas actually do, but instead he waddles along upright like a toddler with a full diaper, which ruins it.  The people who made the movie also appear to think gorillas are nocturnal which, for the record, they are not.

Gorillas were kind of a big thing in movies of the 40's and 50's.  The species had been scientifically described a century earlier, but hadn't really been studied until the 1920s and most people had never seen one outside of King Kong. Films of the period were not kind to the gorilla.  One of the first gorilla movies was 1930's Ingagi, which purported to be a documentary about gorillas kidnapping women as sex slaves.  That kind of set the tone, and subsequent movies depicted gorillas as creatures prone to violence and rape.  Examples from this blog alone are numerous: The Ape Man (1940), Panther Girl of the Kongo (1955), and Bride of the Gorilla (1951) for starters... Robot Monster (1953) might also count.

The Ape has a slightly more nuanced approach to gorilla behaviour.  Yes, its gorilla does maul people to death... but the first victim is its trainer, who has been shown mistreating it.  Another circus employee even tries to tell him that he'll catch more flies with honey.  When the ape batters its way into Dr. Adrien's house, it does so in order to get at the trainer's coat, which Adrien left draped over a chair when the dying man was brought to him for treatment.  We see far more fear of the escaped ape than we do of the animal itself, and it does not commit near as many murders as Adrien does while dressed in its skin!

So that's halfway progressive for the 1940s.  We can also look at the treatment of Frances, the wheelchair-user partially paralyzed by polio.  She is clearly meant to be an object of the audience's pity, and Adrien is obsessed with making her able to walk again – as he could not do for his own daughter.  To some extent the movie infantilizes her, as she is clearly dependent on her mother, unable to have much of a social life, and her boyfriend Danny professes his willingness to 'take care of her'.  When she regains movement in her legs at the end of the movie, she and her mother immediately burn her wheelchair.  Apparently she's not allowed to build up her stamina slowly... if she walks ten minutes from home and then can't continue, she's just gotta sit there until she recovers or somebody finds her.

On the other hand, Frances' family aren't trying to force Adrien's possible cure on her, but let her choose it for herself. Her mother doesn't mind looking after her, and Danny is happy to accommodate her by, for example, hiring a cart so she can accompany him to the circus.  Danny in particular is very suspicious of the fact that the injections Adrien gives to Frances are causing her pain, and takes the doctor to task for it, telling him he would rather have her disabled and happy than walking but in pain.  “I'd rather carry her around all my life!” he says.  Her loved ones are willing to try for the cure, but it doesn't seem like anyone will be miserable if it fails.  Frances herself wistfully admires the acrobats at the circus, but shows no anger or bitterness that she cannot be like them.

Frances is even allowed some initiative, as she hurries down the road in her wheelchair calling to Dr. Adrien and trying to warn him that the gorilla is in the area.  This, ironically, is what leads to Adrien getting shot, as it attracts the attention of the posse hunting the animal.  But as Adrien lies dying, he gets to see Frances standing for the first time in ten years, so I guess we're meant to think this was all worth it.

But was it?  Several people died in order to provide the spinal fluid that helped Frances heal.  The movie shows them as terrified of Dr. Adrien and/or the gorilla, but other than that it is oddly uninterested in their fates.  None of the deaths are presented as tragedies, with families left in mourning... the only family we hear about for the gorilla trainer is a father who is already dead, and another one of the victims was an asshole who told his wife if she didn't like him cheating on her she could always drown herself(!??).  So... are we supposed to think they don't matter?  That their deaths are acceptable because they helped Frances – who was not dying or even deteriorating, and was satisfied with her life as it was – to a cure?

It is notable that we do not see what happens when Frances finds out that people had to die for her to be able to walk.  She would have to reassess her opinion of Dr. Adrien, whom until now she has thought of as a loving father figure.  She would have to figure out what this means for her future and perhaps need reassurance that she is not culpable.  Her unconcerned happiness at the end suggests that nobody bothered to tell her, and that she has not yet made the connection herself.  This is really quite unfortunate, because it deprives Frances of her only real chance to be a character rather than a plot point – which is ultimately all she is here.

Nobody else is shown dealing with the aftermath, either.  The town has long mistrusted Dr. Adrien because of rumours that he was experimenting on his patients, and a recent spate of missing dogs is shown to be his fault.  An early scene shows a group of boys bothering the doctor by throwing rocks at his house (which made me wonder if toilet paper hadn't been invented yet. According to Wikipedia, it dates to 1857, so there's your Fun Fact for the day). Seeing their worst fears realized really ought to have some effect on the people.  Even if nobody bothers to tell Frances how her miraculous cure was effected, others will surely figure it out and have to weigh up what he achieved versus the crimes he committed to get there.

Yeah, I know: this is a movie about a guy killing people while wearing a dead gorilla.  I'm thinking too hard.

Finally, I want to note some interesting possible connections between The Ape and a number of other movies I've seen.  Both The Ape and The Ape Man appear to have been inspired by the 1932 movie Murders in the Rue Morgue, which also features a gorilla and injections of bodily fluids in the name of mad science, and did not feature very much resemblance to Edgar Allen Poe's story of the same name.  I don't know if these films directly inspired each other, and it's been ages since I saw Rue Morgue... but the combination of plot elements here seems weirdly specific to be something different people came up with independently.  I should watch all three again and see if I notice any more similarities between them.

There are also interesting likenesses between The Ape and another Boris Karloff movie, 1945's The Grave Robber.  The latter is the story of a doctor who needs fresh corpses as part of his research, which culminates in surgery to allow a paralyzed girl to walk again.  The doctor in this film is more a victim than a villain, himself, as he finds that the man he's been paying to rob graves for him is actually murdering the homeless, and he can't expose this criminal without jeopardizing his work and incriminating himself.  It's been a long time since I saw this movie, either (as I mentioned a few weeks ago, I've had some shit going on and I haven't had a lot of time for movies, bad or otherwise), so I can't actually say if it's better than The Ape, but it's definitely less silly.

Anyway, the moral of this story is vaccinate your fucking kids or a gorilla will kill you.

[supercalvin]

Hi! I saw your ficlet that you wrote to cheer up someone who came out and didn't have a good experience with it and I was wondering if you could maybe write another one? My girlfriend and I came out at the same time and no one's taking it too well. We're both big fans of Merlin and especially your ficlets. I was wondering if you can write a nice supportive coming out ficlet to maybe cheer her up?

So I will tell you what I said to @ancient-depressed-druid over on that other ficlet: *Immediately drops all other prompts* LOOK AT ME. I’M THE PARENT NOW.

NEVER SPEAK TO ME OR MY KIDS EVER AGAIN

1. I hope you don’t mind that I based on a fic idea my friend gave me. It’s really funny, although it’s not necessarily a ‘coming out fic’ I hope its enough to cheer you both up.

2. This turned out wayyy too long again. Whoops.

3. Did I take 20 min to make that image?? YES I DID

Prompts + Ficlets

***

Balinor arrived at the oral surgeon’s office with a sigh. To say that this was not how Balinor expected to spend his afternoon would be an understatement.

“I’m here to pick up Arthur Pendragon,” He told the receptionist.

There were a lot of things about the last fifteen years of Balinor’s life that he hadn’t expected. For one thing, he hadn’t expected to run into an old flame when he moved to Camelot. He hadn’t expected her to have a little toddler at her ankles who had looked so similar to Balinor it actually knocked the breath out of him the first time he saw Merlin.

He hadn’t expected to fall back in love with Hunith or to suddenly become a full-time Dad as Hunith worked full-time at the local senior home.

He also hadn’t expected when Merlin came out to him, but Hunith had admonished him for not noticing Merlin’s small probing conversation starters before. Balinor had never been very good at social cues. Merlin had gotten all those genes from his mother.

“Da, can Arthur come over after school tomorrow?”

“Who’s Arthur? You’ve not mentioned him before.” Balinor had asked, not looking up from the wood he had been cutting. (Merlin had become an avid reader and needed a new bookshelf in his room. Merlin had said they could just buy one but Balinor had insisted on making one for him.)

“Um…Well… He’s my boyfriend. Maybe.”

Balinor had looked up at that. Merlin had his arms wrapped around himself and he had hovered by the door, as if he was about to run out.

Balinor had nodded, “Fine. But you have to keep your door open when he’s here.”

“Da,” Merlin’s face had been bright red, but he had also looked pleased.

“Get back here,” Balinor had stopped him before Merlin bolted out the door. Balinor had pulled his son into a quick hug and pressed a kiss to his hair. At seventeen years old, Merlin was skinny and soon he would be just as tall as Balinor himself. When that day came, Balinor would miss being able to coddle him so easily.

“Thanks, Da.”

“Don’t be too happy, I haven’t met this Arthur yet.”

On principle, Balinor did not like Arthur. No one would be good enough for Merlin, but especially not some spoiled brat. Hunith liked Arthur, which was the only reason Balinor tolerated Merlin having the kid over as often as he did. It wasn’t that he was mean to Arthur (of course not) it was just that Merlin was the most important thing in Balinor’s life, and there was a high possibility that young love would turn to young heartbreak. Balinor only wished he could spare his son that.

Today, Arthur was getting his wisdom teeth removed and the original plan was for Hunith and Merlin to pick him up. Apparently, Uther was on a business that had been scheduled for the same week as Arthur’s surgery. But then Merlin had had to help his Uncle Gaius at the shop and then there had been an emergency at the senior home and Hunith couldn’t do it.

Which left Balinor.

Balinor was ushered into the back room where Arthur was holding an icepack to his face, eyes glazed over.

“Arthur?” Balinor leant down to catch the boy’s eye.

Arthur blinked a few times and then he seemed to recognize Balinor.

“Mr. Emrysss!” He said with what Balinor assumed was a smile, although his cheeks were so puffed that it was hard to tell. “Ow.”

“Careful of the stitches,” The nurse said. “Maybe get a milkshake, love.”

“Milkshake,” Arthur said with wide eyes, looking up at Balinor.

Shit.

Which is how Balinor found himself driving down the road trying to remember the closest ice cream shop.

“Sorry you got stuck with me. I know you don’t like me.”

Balinor was surprised that despite the slow and slurred speech Arthur seemed aware enough to say this.

“I don’t dislike you. You’re dating my son. I’m just watching out for Merlin.”

“’das fair.” Arthur said and then poked his own cheek a few times.

“Stop that. You’ll pull the stitches.” Balinor pulled his hands away from his face.

Arthur sat on his hands, looking like a scolded five-year-old instead of a bratty teenager.

Arthur still seemed very out of it and didn’t say much for another few minutes. He might have dozed off, but he woke up again when Balinor handed him a vanilla milkshake.

“’hanks”

With a bit of sugar into him, Arthur became decidedly more chatty.

“You know, I really do like Merlin.”

“I would hope so,” Balinor said as he drove.

“I love him, actually. Haven’t told him yet. Scarred.”

Balinor’s heart tugged a bit. He wasn’t heartless. He just worried over Merlin. But he could also recognize that Arthur was also a young boy in the throes of first love too.

“Don’t be scarred of your own feelings, Arthur.” Balinor said, a phrase that he had told Merlin many times before.

“Not what my Dad says. Always tells me to get over it.”

Balinor had only ever met Uther once, but he was starting to really not like the man. Really, what kind of man had a business trip on the same week as his son’s surgery?

“You know, I really respect you.” Arthur said, “You’re always so good to Merlin. And saying things like that about feelings. Even if you’re all stoic. I like that. Wish my Dad was like that instead of just being an asshole. Shit, sorry for cursing.”

Balinor had to hold in a laugh, although it was hard. The poor kid was out of his mind on pain meds.

“You know, when Merlin invites me over on Sundays, and Ms. E makes dinner and we watch a film, it’s like the best thing that happens to me all week.”

At a stop sign, Balinor looked over at Arthur who was cradling his milkshake with reverent hands. He also was looking out the window, not really aware of Balinor. As if he was just saying his internal monologue out loud.

“Sometimes I don’t see my Dad all week and I’m alone in a big house for days in a row.” Arthur said, his voice sounding distant, “Dad doesn’t have a clue about Merlin. He barely knows I’m alive, let alone gay. So I’m glad Merlin has you,” Arthur looked back over at Balinor, suddenly pinning him in his seat with round dilated eyes. “You’re a good Dad. Maybe you don’t like me, but it’s because you want Merlin to have the best. That’s alright by me. I don’t think I’m good enough for Merlin either. But I’ll stick around because he wants me to.”

Balinor cleared his throat and turned back to the road after realizing he had been stopped at a stop sign for over a minute.

***

A week later, Arthur was fully recovering from the surgery and he had no recollection of anything he said to Balinor. As far as he was aware, he got a milkshake, took a nap, and woke up groggy on the Emrys’ front room sofa.

The following Sunday, Arthur was invited to their family dinner. Afterwards, when Arthur offered to do the dishes, Balinor quietly started drying, telling Hunith and Merlin to go pick a film.

There was tension pouring off Arthur in waves.

“We’re going on a family trip to Ireland in the summer,” Balinor said, wiping down a pan.

“Yeah, Merlin told me. Sounds nice,” Arthur said awkwardly.

“You’re invited.”

“What?” Arthur dropped the bowl back into the soapy water with a loud ‘plop.’

Balinor made eye contact with Arthur, who looked utterly baffled. “Do you want to go?”

“I mean…uh,” Arthur blinked.

“It’d be nice for you to come,” Balinor said. “Merlin would be ecstatic. You two could go off sightseeing while Hunith and I visit old friends.”

“You wouldn’t mind?”

“Arthur,” Balinor said, trying to make himself clear. “Merlin didn’t ask me. He doesn’t even know I’m asking you. I’m asking because I want you to come along.”

Arthur nodded. His mouth was still half open in surprise. “Yeah. Um. I’d like that. Thanks.”

“Good,” Balinor dried off another plate and ruffled Arthur’s hair. “Finish up here. Those two are likely picking some horrible film. I need your vote against another historical drama.”

Arthur looked baffled, but he also looked pleased.

Good, Balinor thought. Maybe it wasn’t too bad having another son around the house.

***

Prompts + Ficlets

Balinor said, “Is anyone gonna adopt this kid?” and then didn’t wait for an answer.

[saeransangel]

Fine Line

Spencer Reid x Reader

*Trigger Warning*

Warnings: addiction(use of narcotics/opioids), swearing, angst

**This is in NO way condoning the use of drugs or glorifying/romanticizing addiction... Many of the things in here are based off personal experiences I’ve been through in the past. I know how draining and horrible it is. This is a vent piece for me. Please do not read if you are uncomfortable with reading about drug use.

The reader starts to fall into a rough group of friends while occupying time when Spencer is away. As Spencer starts to catch on to her blossoming addiction, the reader admits she needs help.

Word Count: 2496.

You and your boyfriend, Spencer had finally gotten into bed together after a long day. He had just gotten back from a case in California and was completely exhausted. You on the other hand, were still recovering from a party you went to yesterday. You were told the night was fun, but it was all a blurred memory to you. After about three hours of sleeping together, the phone rings. It was Spencer’s cell.

“Hello?” He answered, his voice sounded tired and drained. You both knew it was the BAU calling. You sighed in annoyance. He had just gotten back, you haven’t gotten to spend any quality time together in two weeks and it was putting a strain on your relationship. Neither one of you said anything, but you could feel it. It was starting to feel different. The connection between you wasn’t as strong as it always had been, and that worried you. But you were too scared to bring it up. Not that there was ever time anyways.

“Okay, I’ll be right there.” Spencer said after a while. He hung up the phone and got out of bed, careful not to disturb you, though you were already awake.

“Spence, again?” You sighed.

“I’m sorry Y/N. I should only be gone a few days, then we can spend all week together.” He promised. You knew he was trying and it was just apart of the job, but recently it’s been too much. You’ve spent too much time away from him. 

“You said that last time, Spencer.” It came out more aggressive than you wanted and you instantly felt bad.

His eyes softened as he looked towards you. He sat down beside you and embraced you gently. “I really am sorry, Y/N. I love you so much, but this is my job.” He sounded so upset, knowing he hurt you. Slowly, you melted into his arms and wrapped your own around his slim figure.

“I know, I’m sorry, I just miss you so much when you’re gone.” You whispered, almost tearing up at the thought of being without him again. It might seem dramatic for only a few days, but he was your moral compass. It was hard without him around.

He kissed your forehead and gave you one last loving embrace before grabbing his Go Bag and leaving the bedroom.

As you lied back down into the now empty bed, you felt like you were sinking already. What was the point of this relationship if it was a constant revolving door of leaving and being together? Before you could get too deep into your thoughts, you heard a ping sound come from your phone. 

“Hey, Y/N, I know we just raged together last night, but I miss you so much already lol! Come to my place right now. Zoe is bringing the usual. It’s gonna be fun!!”

It was your friend Sam inviting you over for a party...at 2 am. You sat and stared at the message, wondering if it was a good idea to go. Your body still hadn’t fully recovered from last night, but you didn’t want to be alone tonight. You shot back a quick response and put some different clothes on that were fit for this type of party. As you headed out the door, your body was already feeling excited for the rush this night was going to give you.

When you arrived at Sam’s house, you took a deep and shaky breath. Was this really what you wanted to turn to? Finding comfort in a six hour euphoria? Whatever your better judgement told you, it was too late. You were already getting out of the car and walking up to the house that was flooding with people and blaring loud music. You stepped through the front door and took in your surroundings. Sam, Zoe and a few other people you recognized were sitting on the large sectional couch, passing a blunt around with each other.

“Y/N! You’re here!” Zoe shouted over the music. You approach the group with a vibrant smile. You took the blunt from Sam and took a long drag off it. The smoke filled your lungs. It felt good, you slowly started to relax.

“You look like shit.” Sam said bluntly. “What happened to you?”

A long sigh escaped from your lips. “I’m still a mess from last night I guess.” You replied trying to just laugh it off.

“It’s more than that, tell us what’s wrong?” She pushed. You didn’t really want to tell her, but at the same time you needed to vent. They were always there for you. Why was now any different?

“It’s Spencer. He’s always leaving me because he has to go fly across the country to do whatever it is he’s doing!” You didn’t mean for that to sound as selfish as it did, and you knew if Spencer ever heard you say that he would be crushed. He loved you unconditionally, and here you were acting self-centered and mean. “He’s means well though, I know he loves me. But it’s hard someti-”

Zoe spoke up. “Save it, Y/N/N. We understand.” You gave her an apologetic smile. You shouldn’t have said anything. Spencer is the best boyfriend you could ever ask for, even if he was gone more often than you would like, you loved him and he would never talk about you like this. The feeling of missing him was being overtaken by the guilt you felt from talking about him leaving. Tears welled in your eyes. You looked down to try and hide the fact that you were now a teary mess.

“Y/N/N, we’re here for you.” Sam said while rubbing circles on the small of your back. The music was blaring so loud you almost didn’t hear her. You recognized the song. CANT SAY  By Travis Scott. You smiled, remembering all the amazing ragers you went to with Sam, Zoe, and the others. 

Your reminiscing was cut short. You noticed Zoe placed a small bag on the table that everyone was sitting around. There where small, circular, white pills inside. Your heart dropped into your stomach. “Is that...” Your voice trailed off.

“Oxy? Yes, ma’am it is.” Zoe smirked. You instantly got the feeling you shouldn’t have come tonight. In the past you struggled with a lot of substance abuse issues. Opioids in particular. It started after a surgery, Valium, then  Hydrocodone, then it escalated to Oxycontin. You even rolled on molly every so often. But you went to rehab about three years ago. You were clean, apart from the occasional marijuana use which seemed to becoming more and more frequent.

“I don’t know if I should. I haven’t in years.” You try and protest. They didn’t seem to care. Zoe grabbed two out of the bag and held them out for you. Upon reflex, you opened your hand and watched as the two pills fell into the palm of your hand. The whole group was looking at you, waiting. Sam popped one into her mouth and swallowed it. She looked eagerly at you. Part of you didn’t want to throw all the years of sobriety down the drain, but the bigger part of you wanted to stop feeling the guilt and the loneliness you felt when Spencer was away.

You didn’t even remember putting them in your mouth, you just remember the feeling of them sliding down your throat. After about twenty minutes, you felt the effects of the narcotic. Your body felt light and weightless. Your thoughts were cloudy. Why were you even here? This is fun right? As you danced through the crowd with your friends, you felt a moment of euphoria as ypu forgot the reason you came here in the first place.

Two Days Later...

You woke up on a scratchy couch that was definitely not apart of your home. You took in your surroundings, head pounding. You were still at Sam’s house. You grabbed your phone to check the time. It was probably late the next day...

“It’s been two days?” You gasped. You shot up, looking for Sam. Her house was so big, you didn’t even know where to look. Luckily you didn’t have to go far. She was in the kitchen with Zoe and another guy named Jared. They all laughed and turned towards you as you walked in.

“Look who decided to wake up,” Zoe teased. 

You glared at her. “It’s not funny.” You spat. “How long was I asleep?”

“Only, like ten hours, chill.” Sam laughed awkwardly.

“I got here Friday night, its Sunday now.” You were growing impatient. So many questions raced through your mind.

“Yeah... we were together partying all weekend, are you okay?” Zoe urged.

“I don’t remember anything except for Friday night.” You admitted. Instinctively you checked your phone again. Your eyes widened. 

Missed Calls: Spencer Reid(16)

Upon looking further you found dozens of texts, to which you replied, “At Sam’s party!” You had no recollection of sending that.

Spence: What?! Why are you with her??

The most recent text was from a few hours ago.

Spence: Hey angel, I’m just checking in on you... You’ve sent me one text the past couple days. Are we okay? I love you so much. I’ll be home in a few hours. Please call me. 

Your heart broken into a million pieces. Your free hand covered your mouth in an attempt to stop the sobs from coming out of your mouth. You stared down and the phone in your shaky hands. He knew who these girls were. He knew they always were trouble and fueled your addiction in the past. You knew he was concerned for you. The thought of him being upset and not being able to see you was suffocating. Zoe and Sam rushed over to you right away.

“Hun, what’s wrong.” Sam pleaded with you. You didn’t want to be here anymore. You hated them for doing this to you. For doing this to Spencer. You hated yourself even more. You needed to get out.

“Get away from me.” You cried. Fighting there grip, you pulled away from them. You ran into the living room and sat on the floor, back leaning against the sofa.

The two girls followed you into the living room, worried looks strewn across their face. Before they could say anything, the doorbell rang. Sam paused before going to open the door.

“Spencer...” She exclaimed surprised. You looked up. The tears wouldn’t stop falling now.

“Y/N, where is she?” He said sternly and he pushed his way through the door. He looked around for a minute before his eyes finally fell on you. He immediately rushed over to you. The look in his brown eyes told you that he knew what you had done. You knew you looked like a mess. It was a dead give away.

“I’m so sorry, Spencer.” You sobbed. His warm arms wrapped around you so tightly you thought you couldn’t breathe, but you didn’t mind. You needed this. 

“You’re going to be okay, Y/N. We can get through this. I promise.” He whispered. You closed your eyes and melted into his comforting touch.

“Is she going to be okay?” Zoe pressed. “I mean, you keep leaving her to go do God knows what. Did you know that’s why she came here.”

Spencer’s grip on you loosened. He leaned back to get a good look at you, trying to see if it was true. NO. This was not his fault. Not after everything he’s been through. You’d be damned if you were going to let him think this was his fault too.

“Shut up.” You said venomously.  She shot you a confused glare. “Don’t you ever speak to him like that EVER!”

“What? I’m trying to defend you?” She shouted. You couldn’t believe her. You couldn’t believe yourself. Everything felt like it was spiraling.

“You’re not defending me. You’re trying to drive the one person that loves me away!” You were screaming now.

Zoe walked closer to you, she was in your face. “At least I care about you!” Her voiced boomed through the house.

“If you really cared about me you wouldn’t have gave me the fucking drugs in the first place.” You wailed. Spencer grabbed you arm. Your head whipped back to look at him. Tears threatened to spill from his eyes. You let out a despondent sigh at the sight of him. You never wanted any of this. You just wanted him to stay. Now look what happened.

 Lost in your thoughts, you hadn’t even noticed Spencer guiding you out the door. He put his arm around you, and without another word to Sam or Zoe, you got into his car.

It was silent for the whole car ride home. You were thinking of all the ways to apologize to him, all the reasons he had to leave you, all the reasons why you didn’t deserve him. When you both arrived back to his apartment, you broke down.

“Spencer, I’m so sorry. It’s not your fault. None of this is.” You sobbed.” It’s all mine. I’m sorry. I love you so much. Please, don’t lea-”

You were cut off by a pair of strong arms embracing you. How did you get so lucky to have a man like Spencer in your life? “Y/N, it’s okay.” He cooed.

“It’s not!” you cried, pushing him away. He looked confused and sad, which only made you cry more. “I’m supposed to take care of you. You’ve gone through so much with your job, your mom, everything. You don’t deserve this, Spence. I don’t deserve you.”

He examined your weak figure before giving you the softest smile you’ve ever seen. “If there’s one thing you have taught me, Y/N, it’s that it’s okay to need a little help sometimes. Recovery is not linear. Slip ups can happen. I know you didn’t want this, but I love you and I’m not going anywhere.” He declared. He slowly wrapped his arms around you again and you let him. He held you as you cried and he didn’t let go even when you stopped the relentless sobbing. His soft hands traced patterns on your back while he listened to your breathing regulate. 

“Nothing you could ever do would make me leave you.” He whispered.  “Because I love you. Nothing can change that.”

You kissed his neck delicately, amazed at how insanely lucky you were to have him around. “Thank you Spencer. I love you so fucking much.” He held you tighter, letting you know that you were safe and everything was going to be okay.

A tear slipped down your cheek. But this wasn’t from sadness. It was from adoration. You knew with your full heart that Spencer loved you, and he was going to get through this with you. One step at a time.

[drivingsideways]

Based on this excellent post and tags  by @frankdelfino, and thanks to @rain-hat yelling in the chat window for twenty minutes, here’s a not-fic outline in the universe where Jo Yeong and Jo Eun-seop are actually brothers. 

So here's how this goes. This is RoK verse, monarchies are passé, thank you for coming to my TEDtalk.

- Jo Yeong and Eun-seop grow up middle class, and look like peas in a pod, have completely opposing personalities and can generally be trusted to get up to the WORST POSSIBLE SHENANIGANS ever known to a pair of long-suffering parents who've had the temerity to have not one, but two sets of twins. Anyways, Eun-seop is absolutely the one GETTING them into the shenanigans, and Yeong is the one getting them OUT of it, despite the fact that Eun-seop is older by 4 minutes

-Eun-seop loses a year at school when he gets into an accident at 14; a drunk driver, a bicycle, and Yeong just a little too far away to do anything but call the ambulance and hold his brother's hand right until they force him to let go as they rush Eun-seop into surgery. He holds it again, once he's wheeled out, and right upto when he wakes up so he doesn't wake up alone (he hasn't gone home in 48hrs, I'm fine, thanks eomma, you should go home to the babies, they'll be scared without you.). Anyways, Eun-seop wakes up, demands to know whether he'll have a cool scar from the surgery (before he demands to know whether he will be able to walk again) and Yeong's like you're never going to be as cool as me, now shut up and sip this water slowly.  Eun-seop recovers, and Yeong's there through every single physio session and taking extra notes in class, and recording videos surreptitiously, so Eun-seop can see how all their classmates are faring and also failing at everything, now that they're in first year of high school. (Yeong would have stayed back a year at school, but Eun-seop forbids it, and uses his Oppa-pass, which he only uses when he's really serious about something, so Yeong has to listen)

- Eun-seop notices that some of his videos begin to feature a rather weird looking dude, who can be seen hanging out with this one girl. Eun-seop knows Tae-eul noona, her dad runs that taekwondo academy two blocks away, right? And there was that one time when Eun-seop was being bullied and Yeong wasn't there that day, and noona had stepped in and scared those assholes away. Anyways, so yeah, he also remembers that there was this other guy with her, who'd also clearly been ready to throw down, if those goobers had put up a fight, but later, he just grabbed noona's hands, checked for injuries, and given Eun-seop some candy that he got out from his bag.

Anyways, so Eun-seop is like why do you have pictures of Tae-eul noona and her weird boyfriend, and Yeong snatches the phone away and mutters, THEY'RE JUST GOOD FRIENDS, in all caps as though he knows anything about life or girls.

Oh my god, Yeongie, he says, you know she's way out of your league right? She's a senior? And like would absolutely beat you to shit, wouldn't need her weirdo bf to do it either-

HE'S NOT HER BOYFRIEND, Yeong says, loudly this time, as loud as the time when Eun-seop had replaced his hair cream with toothpaste and Eun-seop quickly recalibrates and gets it right this time, and he says, hushed,  Yeongie, my Yeongie, did you manage to fall for the one dude who'd give you a run for your money in "the person most likely to end up a serial killer" stakes?

He starts cackling so hard that his ribs start to hurt, and then his back, and Yeong (who's run away – RUN AWAY) doesn't come back to help him up. It's alright, Eun-seop will live, and also, he's gonna help his Yeongie get his guy, even if Eun-seop cannot see the attraction, and he thinks this isn’t going to work for many reasons, only one of which is that CLEARLY this dude- Kang Sin Jae, he remembers now- is in love with Tae-eul noona, which, props, anyone might see she absolutely kicks ass.

But the point is, the Jos are fighters, and he's damned if he's going to let Yeong slink away from this one.  

The next time he sees Yeongie- two hours later- they all have a bedtime in the Jo house, ok- he's like, fine, I'm sorry, and I KNOW YOU DON'T HAVE A SINGLE USEFUL THOUGHT IN YOUR HEAD, so I got this for you, ok?  What do you know about him?

Turns out, Yeongie has a whole folder on him.

Eun-seop's proud of his little stalker baby brother.

Anyways, that's how Yeong learns enough about sound systems so he can turn up for the post when the school band that Kang Sin Jae plays bass guitar for advertises for a sound engineer.

He turns up for the "interview" in his neat trousers, and button-down shirt and Sin Jae says, uh, are you Jo Eun-seop's non-identical twin? Aren't you just a freshman, do you really- and Yeong says, quietly, confidently, I can solve that problem you're having when you play your arrangement of The Wizard and Sin Jae stares at him and mutters, but can you do anything about how only three people turn up to listen, and Yeong tilts his head, and says maybe? Also, Eun-seop and I are identical, just fyi.

Anyways, yeah he fixes the faulty wiring in the speakers at the auditorium, and also gets more than three people to turn up (so what if it's all a bunch of scared looking freshmen? They've all been paid more than enough to bang their heads in time to the music and cheer later.)

But he never does ask Sin Jae out, that entire year, even though these days, Sin Jae smiles when he sees him, and puts an arm around his shoulder sometimes, after a practice, what are you waiting for, Yeongie, did I raise you to be this much of a coward? Eun-seop wails, but Yeong is like, Sin-Jae-ssi would feel awkward at having to refuse me if I did, and he needs a sound engineer more than a boyfriend, and that's fine.

(He needs at least three shirts more, a hair-cut and perhaps better taste in music, Eun-seop thinks, but doesn't say, because he knows Yeongie's fragile like that. Yeongie can take anything anybody says about him, personally, and will brush it off or dole out appropriate punishment, but if someone comes after someone he loves, he'll break the knees of the person and leave them for dead in a ditch. And obviously, he can't do that with Eun-seop, so Eun-seop doesn't say anything, he's a good elder brother.)

- Sin-jae and Tae-eul noona graduate and both of them go off to KNPU, and Eun-seop says, listen, nobody does that if they're not dating, at least. IF NOT ACTUALLY ILLEGALLY MARRIED. Yeongie, please, for the love of god, find a boy who's available. See, here's a list.

But Yeong just shrugs, and says, let me see your homework (because Eun-seop's back in school now) and then proceeds to put red slashes through everything and says, "apply your brains Eun-seop, don't act dumb when you're not". THE AUDACITY.

Yeong never dates anyone through high school, Eun-seop dates a different person every month.

- So Eun-seop is never going to have to serve in active military duty, because of his accident, but Yeong will have to. He's fine with that, and he'd rather do it in these two years, just after school, because that way, it's only really one year when Eun-seop will be at college before him, and that's fair, it evens out Yeong's having to graduate from school first.

-So off he goes, and there he meets Lee Ji-hun, who's an ass, Eun-seop clocks that straight away, born into some goddamn chaeobol family, but for some reason drawn to actual military service, because he has a hero complex. The only good thing he has going for him, as far as Eun-seop can tell, his that he took one look at Yeongie and decided that he was the best boy in the whole universe, and that shows good taste, Eun-seop will be polite to him, fine.

- Of course, the other thing that happens in those two years is that Yeongie gets brainwashed into joining the Navy- it's not brainwashing, Yeong tries to tell him, I get to protect the people I love, the country I love. And of course, Lee Ji-hun, fucking asshole, is just sitting there, nodding along as though any of this was fucking REASONABLE. You could DIE, Eun-seop yells, DO YOU REALIZE THAT. WE'RE STILL AT FUCKING WAR.

Yes, says his stepford-wife brother, womb-sharer, soulmate, exactly.

- Anyways, off Yeong and Jihun go to join not just the Navy, which would be bad enough, but the ROKSWF, that's insane, they're going to die, and what can Eun-seop do then but go join the NIS and immediately get picked for North Korean Affairs by an astute senior officer who listens to Eun-seop goofing around in the canteen on the orientation day and still get everyone to give him their portion of the only decent thing on the menu- the crème brulee- and says, I'm taking that one.

- It's a lot of paperwork and dull as ditches monitoring work at the start, and that's ok, Eun-seop can live with that, it means he gets time with the other twins, who are at a fun age. And that's how Tae-eul noona and Kang Sin Jae re-enter their lives because Eun-bi and Kka-bi are learning taekwondo from Tae-eul's dad. This is also how Eun-seop meets the love of his life and future wife Myeong Na-Ri, and it's ok if she doesn't know it yet, at least Yeongie is not here to see him turn into a complete doofus everytime Na-Ri so much as breathes in his direction.

- Yeongie and Jihun come back on shore leave (AFTER TWO GODDAMN YEARS) and that's when Ji-hun meets Tae-eul and falls like a ton of bricks for her; she manages to keep her sense of balance and also life in order, thanks, she's not going to fall for some floppy haired dude (his hair grows really fast out of its crew cut) who thinks that parallel universes are a thing, even if he has extremely long legs.

Meanwhile Kang Sin Jae has also cleaned up nice, Eun-seop will admit, and he's-he's a genuinely nice dude, ok, even if a bit brusque, and when Eun-seop finds out about eomeonim's gambling problems and that whole story, he's willing to admit that he may have been a tad harsh on Kang Sin-Jae way back when.

Anyways, that's the past, right, Yeongie, I can't imagine what a bunch of men locked in a submarine can possibly do except have orgies, please tell me that's what you've been doing? Please?

"Shut up" hisses Yeong, and then practically jumps out of his chair when Tae-eul noona and Sin Jae come over to their table at Na-ri's coffee shop. Yeong's in his uniform- he was on his way back from some conference thing he'd had to go to despite his leave- so that was the saving grace, because Eun-seop sees the subtle double-take Kang Sin Jae does,  because let's face it, his baby brother is the most beautiful, it's true, but then Yeongie is also red in the face and says "toffee" instead of "coffee" as in "Won't you get some toffee, Sin Jae-ssi?" and Sin Jae gives him a blank look while he decodes that, (gay panic, Eun-seop wants to tell him, my brother is a panicked gay, go easy on him), and finally says, uh, I don't think they have that flavor here?

- God, Eun-seop says later, I CANNOT BELIEVE YOU, BABY BROTHER. HAVE YOU BEEN IN LOVE WITH THE SAME BOY FROM HIGH SCHOOL? ARE YOU STILL A VIRGIN? (AFFIRMATIVE ON BOTH) and Eun-Seop has FAILED, FAILED, FAILED. Alright, he says, taking a deep breath, how long do you have?

Two weeks, says his stupid fucking brother, and so Eun-seop has to go into EMERGENCY-FUCKING-MODE because he may have to DIE getting it to happen, but his baby brother is GOING TO GET LAID, AND BY THE LOVE OF HIS LIFE, EVERYONE'S FIRST TIME NEEDS TO BE SPECIAL OK, Ji-hun? Ji-hun nods, very seriously, and proceeds to describe his extremely un-special first time, and Eun-seop is like, wow, you probably don't know this, because you've got that puppy face that make people not want to hurt you, but every single woman you've ever slept with has faked an orgasm with you. Well, that discussion gets pretty heated, of course, and also comes to an abrupt end when Tae-eul noona pops in- she's come by to ask if they all wanna hang out and watch a movie this weekend- and look, noona's GREAT, and obviously the first person he needs on his ally list as soon as he makes sure she's not really in love with Sin Jae, because that would be bad.

"Hyungnim?" she says, surprised, when he asks, because Eun-seop knows the best way to get noona to answer anything is to play no games, and she says, "No, why?" and then, suspiciously, "Did that rat Jihun put you up to this?" And he says, absent mindedly, no I was asking 'cause Yeong, and noona yelps, "Jo Yeong can't be in love with me, shit!" and Eun-seop says, what, why, and that's how he finds out that hey, Kang Sin Jae may also have been a little into his idiot brother from way back when. "He was too young" Tae-eul noon confides, "Sin Jae didn't feel right about it, especially when he was graduating that year" and honestly, THIS IS THE SADDEST STORY EUN-SEOP HAS EVER HEARD AND HE'S WATCHED TITANIC FORTY TIMES AND CRIED EACH TIME OK?

- RIGHT. So maybe Eun-Seop and Tae-eul manage to get their idiot friend and brother a little push in the right direction. Well, noona basically goes to Sin Jae and says, for fucks sake, ask the poor boy out, I heard he's still a virgin for you.  And Sin Jae goes red in the face, and then green, because omg the PRESSURE, and then red again, and then ultimately does find Yeong one day at the coffee shop alone, as Eun-seop had assured him he would be - (Diligently reading some book? A recipe book? Italian recipes? Sin Jae may have mentioned one day that his favourite cuisine was Italian?)- and there's some part of him that melts, like the cheese on the cover of that recipe book, and he's like, uh, do you, maybe, and then rushed, I know this great Italian place, if you like, and yes, Jo Yeong would like very much.

- Jo Yeong returns to Jinhae Naval Command very much not a virgin, and Jihun returns still single, but undaunted by the task ahead of him; don't worry, Yeong-ah, he says, confidently, I'll wear her down, even if it takes me years, and Yeong knows Jihun, he knows how much of a barnacle he can be, and also it wouldn't be nice of him to shit on other people's happiness just when he's found his own, so he nods and says, yes, of course, and even listens to Jihun rhapsodize about Tae-eul noona's everything for about two hours straight. He texts Eun-seop at the half-way mark- kill me now, please-and Eun-seop is like, what's North Korea there for, then, I told you to dump his ass in the sea. But of course he won't, Jihun and he are ride or die, and it turns out dying is more likely in this case, because right about that time is when North Korea decides that it needs to remind the world that yes, they exist, and yes, the men that rule them are crazy fucks.

- What happens is this: Koo Seo-Ryeong is a brilliant pianist, who's one of the few DPRK citizens who's let out to see the world has disappeared with her mother and sister, while she was on tour in Australia. And look, she did it in Australia, it has nothing to do with RoK, except that Kim Jong-un has decided that it has, because her (estranged) father happened to be one of the top honchos in  DPRK military brass, and this was all clearly a conspiracy hatched across the border to get at him and the military secrets he knows.

- Eun-seop is there when the news comes in that there's a Sang-o class submarine in the waters at Jeongdongjin, and he's also there when it turns out, that yes, hello, they were trying to get the Koo family out, and he's also the one that gets a single line text from an unknown number that's the code he made Yeongie swear on everything they held dear that he would send if he was going behind enemy lines. Shit. Shit.Shit.

- OK, I confess, I don't know how this next part goes, reader, because I am not John Le Carre or whoever, and this is still NOT-FIC,  BUT SPY THINGS HAPPEN and at the end of the day, Eun-Seop has to choose between saving his brother and letting the Koo family back into the hellhole they'd just managed to extract themselves from, and listen, noona made him listen to Koo Seo-Ryeong's playing ok, and there's- even if she were a shitty musician, even if she were just some rat bastard politician or a fisherwoman- he knows he can't make a choice that is sending her back to her death, and the deaths of everyone she loves. And if he did, and if he did, just to save his womb-brother, his true love, his soulmate, his blood and bone and heart- why, he knows that Yeong would never forgive him, Oppa-pass or no. So he's gotta rescue Yeongie and save the Koo family AND STOP WORLD WAR THREE, good thing he's totally up to the task.

- MORE SPY THINGS HAPPEN AND HE SAVES THE DAY, OK.

- He does, and so this time he gets to be the rescuer, and honestly, this was a big one, and it totally evens out all the 15 million times in their entire lives that Yeong had rescued him, what does Yeongie think? Yeongie thinks he should shut up and let him sleep, and because he's a good oppa, the best oppa, Eun-seop curls around his baby brother in their too narrow bunk bed, just like they did when they were sixteen or ten or five or in the womb, and goes to sleep too.  

[jennbabeyy]

Stepmom Material (Pt. 8)

A/n: Sorry for the long wait ! Part 8 is finally here. We get to see a little glimpse of what was behind Coco’s decision. Thank you guys for loving Stepmom Material. Let me know what y’all think!

Coco leaned against the wall, his eyes moving around the crowd. The murmurs and conversation carried around him without any distractions or any glances at him. It was a bit of a reflex, something he found himself trying not to do when he went somewhere. Though this time, it wasn’t a reflex, he was looking for the face he now only sees in his dreams.That certain face he was looking for was no longer in his life and he didn’t really have anything or anyone to blame but himself.  

The crowd around him seemed to get bigger by the minute and Coco tried to not let the noises get to him. He’s not a huge fan of big crowds but something in him wanted to be here. There wasn’t a personal invitation from any of them and he knew he had no right trying to be here after all the shit he has pulled. 

But he was proud. 

Johnny Coco Cruz was proud of his daughter when he heard first from Angel that she was getting the highest achievement award from her high school. His daughter was doing big things and he wasn’t there next to her side to be able to enjoy it. But someone else was. 

Y/n had taken Letty in during one of the most difficult times ever for everyone. Coco didn’t remember much except from finally waking up in a room at the small clinic that the Mayans used when someone got hurt. The only thing that came to mind was his entire body screaming in pain.The days after that were a bit hazy. 

Shit was tough for a while, Coco was tied down in a bed recovering from two gunshots, one in the shoulder, another in the chest. His recovery took twice as much as expected and there was nothing he could do. He was alone most of the time, only company besides his brothers was the nice older nurse with the motherly touch he never had. 

She took care of him, encouraged him to get better. He was in pain most of the time but he deserved it. The pain reminded him of the shit he’s done in the past and he took that shit in with no complaints. According to Angel he almost died during surgery and having Creeper and Tranq in the operating room wasn’t helping the doctor.  His brothers thought he was some type of badass, a legend going down in Mayan history for surviving the worst of the worst. 

Though he didn’t feel like it. 

They never visited him those 6 months he was recovering. 

That was everything he needed to stay away. He was the poison in their lives and he didn’t want to bring any of them down. 

A small cough next to him brought him out of his daydream and he knew who it was without turning his head.

“Thought I would find you here.” Angel spoke, his eyes wandering the crowd before stopping on the familiar head sitting in the front row. 

Coco starred in the same direction, his eyes never leaving Y/n. Her hair was longer than he has last seen before and his fingers twitch at his side. His favorite thing was to run his fingers through her hair while cuddling on the couch. He still remembers the softness of her hair, especially when he misses her the most. 

“I couldn’t bring myself to miss this , even if they don’t want me here.” 

From the corner of his eye, Coco saw Angel nod his head in agreement. There wasn’t much he could say to him about everything that’s happened. He already had to deal with Bishop lecturing him the moment he woke up in the clinic. 

News had already broke that Johnny was giving up his rights as a father and leaving Letty in Y/n’s guardianship. And Bishop made sure to use every second he had to let him know how much of a good one he had lost because of selfish reasons. But little do they know what he was doing was the most selfless thing he’s done in years. 

“Ez said she’s doing good. No more sneaking out late and shit.” Angel nodded his head towards the former prospect, who was sitting in the front row seat next to Y/n. Both of them were currently laughing at something one of them said.

She looked carefree, and glowing. Ez had made an impact on both girls' lives, keeping his promises to not only Letty but Y/n. Making sure Letty could understand her homework or even challenged her with new books everytime he came to visit. 

“She happy?” Coco turned to finally face Angel, eying his best friend since they were teenagers. He was the only one during these couple of months to completely take Coco under his care.

“Leticia? I mean yeah, but she’s a teenager and she’s got all these hormones raging up. Ez said there were a couple of times she lost her temper at the teacher and Y/n had to take over to make sure she wouldn’t get a full month of detention. Something about challenging the teacher over some sexist shit he said in class.”

Coco chuckled, and shook his head. Yeah she was all him all right. There was nothing that Leticia took after her birth mother and he was fucking thankful for that. She has been a one night thing and ended up back at his place pregnant. 

He thought his life was over at the thought of having a child. And when Leticia was born, a part of him warmed up to the idea of being a father. He was on the right track and he was going to be the best dad he could even if he never had one to begin with. 

And he thought he was going to make it. 

Until she left them, stating he wasn’t good enough to be a father with the type of lifestyle he had going. Her words played on replay that entire night, and it got to him. He couldn’t be a single dad to a four month old baby. 

Leticia wasn’t going to have a better future if she stayed here with him. He didn’t know shit about being a parent, his own mother was a shitty parent. 

Angel found them a day later with Letty screaming her lungs out and Coco being sleep deprived.   

While Angel took care of Letty, Coco took a shower where he finally made a decision. 

Letty’s mother was right, one night and he couldn’t even get through it without Letty crying the entire time. The best thing to do was putting her up for adoption with a family that would be able to give her anything, and everything she wanted and deserved. 

Because she deserved more than him. She definitely deserved more than his shitty ass mom. 

And that’s what he did. Until his mom found out and took her in. 

Then shit really went bad. There’s never a day where he beats himself up about the way his mom treated Letty or about the way Leticia spent almost her entire life thinking he was her older brother. 

He couldn’t take those years back, no matter how much he tried to make sure she was good. To have a family she deserved. Something always came to ruin everything. 

Coco cleared his throat, turning his attention back to the front row. Leticia had now joined Y/n and Ez talking to them excitedly, her eyes lit up as she explained something to Ez. And he laughed at her explanation. 

She deserved that. 

Looking at both of them took him back to the night. Noone knew about it. He kept it to himself. Not even Angel who at this point knew his darkest and sinful secrets and he wanted to keep it that way. 

That night at the clubhouse when it was boy’s night playing poker with his brothers. Noone knew that before that he had been riding through town when he ran into her. 

It had been 16 years since he last saw her. The last thing he remembers of her was Letty screaming in the background and her walking out the door with bags in each hand. 

In all honesty, he thought she would’ve overdosed by now. Letty’s mom was no saint, never really had a permanent home. Always hanging with the wrong crowd and doing favors in exchange for some sort of drugs.

But there she was, hanging off some random dude without a care in the world. He wanted to leave before she saw him, but the second his eyes met hers. He knew shit was going to come crashing down. 

A smirk appeared on her face, and when he heard Letty’s name come out of her mouth. It was like a rage of anger overcame his body and he saw red. 

How dare she say his daughter’s name just like nothing. The same one she left behind so she could still be the street hoe who gives daily blowjobs for some drugs. 

The same words she once yelled at him 16 years earlier, were the same ones he heard as he walked out of the place and hopped on his motorcycle. 

The words he tried to keep out of his mind were finally set free and she fucking did it. 

16 years later she fucking broke him again. And she knew what she was doing. 

Angel’s voice brought him back to reality and he followed Angel's eyes toward the front of the auditorium where the principal finally started the ceremony. 

Coco tried to stand still while the ceremony continued and saw as other kids were honored. He heard Angel chuckled beside him as Coco shifted once again. He couldn’t really be in one place for a long time, his nerves were getting the best of him. 

Angel nodded his head towards Letty’s direction where she was acting the same way. Shifting in her seat and constantly fixing her hair. She was nervous as well. Y/n had given up at telling her to stop, it was no use. Leticia always fidgeted in her seat, it was their thing.

A smile made its way towards his face, even at times like these they were in sync. It was like they have always been in each other's lives. And he wished it was like that. 

“And for our next award, I would like to take the time to list the many accomplishments this young lady has achieved. She has managed to become our only student to reach the highest GPA in our school. We had a bit of a troubled start when Leticia first started out with us. Lunch detention became a constant thing with Letty. I like to joke that maybe she just wanted to eat lunch with me.”

The crowd laughed, while Letty covered her face with her hands in embarrassment. 

“But after getting to know Letty, I realized that she is a passionate student. She is intelligent and she is not afraid to give the boys on the debate team a piece of her mind. Which let me tell you, I have never seen a group of boys constantly being challenged like that. She stands up to defend others and she is kind to those around her. This past year I have seen an amazing change with Leticia, not only were her grades going up but actually attending every class. She has truly made a difference not only within herself but here at this school. All she needed was a push and people to believe in her.”

Coco watched as Letty leaned on Y/n, and his heart soared at the sight in front of him. 

“So on behalf of the school and myself, we like to honor Leticia Cruz with this academic achievement award.” 

The room roared with applause as Letty stood up giving both Y/n and Ez a hug before making her way towards the stage. A folded piece of paper in her hands and from where Coco was standing he could see her hand slightly shaking of nerves. 

Next to him, Angel had his phone out taking pictures as Letty received her award and shook hands with the faculty staff. Coco never took his eye of his daughter, taking in the pride he felt in that moment. He’ll just have Angel send him those photos later, he didn’t want to miss anything.

And watching his daughter march up on stage with a sense of confidence, this was it. This is what he wants for her and no one around him saw that Letty wouldn’t be able to achieve this with him in her life. She was meant to be out of his life for the better. Like it was planned 16 years ago.

The room became quiet when Letty reached the podium. Placing her piece of paper in front of her, she let out a deep breath. 

“Uh, when Mrs. Rivera approached me a couple weeks ago about writing a speech, I instantly said no. I’m not a big fan of crowds even if she threaten lunch detention.” Letty looked around, feeling every eye on her as the crowd chuckled. 

“But my guardian made me realize that I should be proud of my accomplishments, to be able to take this moment in and she also threatened to ground me. And she is kinda scary so-” Letty smiled at Y/n, who shook her head.  

Letty continued her speech, not sounding as nervous, “I want to thank Mrs. Rivera, for not only taking the time to push me but to be able to give me a second chance. Most people take a look at me and instantly decide that I shouldn’t be able to achieve certain dreams or be even be given a second chance. I was given a second chance, not only in school but at home too. I want to thank Y/n, ever since I’ve met her she's been the rock I never had but needed.”

Coco watched as Ez wrapped his arm around Y/n and shook her gently to congratulate her. 

“She’s been the mom I’ve never had and I know we go at it sometimes but I’m thankful to have you and be able to just talk to you. You’re my mom and thank you for taking that role and taking care of me.” 

Letty looked up from her paper as she searched the audience in front of her. Coco leaned against the wall, and held his breath knowing what was coming next. Angel cleared his throat, as he looked at anything besides the teenage girl in front of him. 

His eyes met hers, and he saw the shock go through her body. She gasped quietly but the microphone in front of her picked it up and even from where he was standing he could hear it clearly. He could feel her eyes searching his body, and he knew she was making sure his injury wasn’t as bad as everyone made it seem. He was covered up though, his scars were there but no one will be able to see them. And he wanted it that way. 

Letty stood still, her eyes never leaving his. It was a few seconds but Y/n managed to notice that Letty’s attention was taken away and turned around to see what Letty was looking at. 

When he finally took his eyes away from Letty, he immediately met Y/n and he could see the tears gather up in her eyes. They weren’t expecting to see him anytime soon or if he even was healed enough to walk around town.

Shallowing the lump in his throat, Coco managed to take away his eyes from the beautiful face he had missed all these months and when he saw the tears stream down her face, he knew he couldn’t take it anymore. So he painfully broke eye contact and turned to Angel as they walked out of the auditorium. 

A smile reached his face when he heard Letty continue her speech as if nothing happened and continued to thank Ez for helping her with her homework, along with other teachers. 

That’s my girl.

Tagged: 

@carlaangel86​ @xnarca​ @bellamyblech @royale-trash-slytherin @hgs2018 @imagines-and-preferences1216 @i-just-feel-gr3at @sweet-bumble-bee @plentyoffandoms @technicallyvirtualmilkshake​ @poetsheart @onelovesr @docsangel​ @may114​ @glimmerglittergirl​ @whovianayesha​ @trulysucuubus @laricebabe

[femmeharringrove]

we belong - chapter one

tag squad!! - @a-magey​ @harringrovetrashh​ @lostnoise​ @greyspilot​ - if you’d like to be added to the list hmu!!

     Steve Harrington is arguably the strangest beta in Hawkins. Everybody agrees on this one fact. In a town comprised mostly of betas, it’s easy to notice when one is different, and Steve’s behavior has him sticking out like a sore thumb. He’s got plenty of normal beta characteristics, sure. He’s an excellent peacemaker, a level-headed thinker most of the time. But he’s incredibly fiery when he wants to be, aggressively protective, like an alpha hovering over his pack. He’s also adopted six older pups out of the blue, and the rest of Hawkins has watched in utter confusion as he’s marched about town herding his kids along like an omega watching over his litter.

     Billy Hargrove isn’t sure what to make of it.

( read on ao3 )

     And it’s not like he usually spends his time thinking about the brunette’s habits, not outside of the night the other started swinging fists in an attempt to protect Max and her dipshit friends from his rage, but he’s had plenty of time to think lately. He’s had nothing but time in this stupid hospital, with its stupid walls and stupid sterile smell. Once he gets out, he’s determined to never step foot in this place again. Max has been visiting every day, according to the nurses, and her company makes it bearable at best. She actually spent the first three nights sleeping in the waiting room with Harrington of all people.

     Harrington, who, according to Max herself, was admitted into the hospital the night of the mall incident too. Billy just barely remembers seeing the beta there that night; his face littered with bruises and oddly bloody. Max didn’t know what exactly happened, Steve and Dustin won’t tell anyone about it, but from what she gathered the Soviet Union was involved. Billy doesn’t think about that too much – he’s more interested in the way Steve’s been at the hospital every single day with Max, as long as he’s been conscious to see it.

     The nurses say Steve’s been with her ever since he was discharged, coming in every day and comforting her whenever she gets upset. He’s seen the beta do it too, the way he opens his arms up the moment Max’s lip begins to wobble and holds her close until she’s calmed, petting her hair and murmuring in her ear something he can never hear.

     Sometimes he brings little Byers with him, and the kid’s nice. Billy likes him. The first time the pup came to visit, he sat right next to the scowling alpha and told him that he got it, he’d been there before, and if he ever wanted to talk about it he’d listen. At the time, Billy snapped about not needin’ to talk to some pup about any damn thing, but that didn’t deter the kid, and now the blonde was thinking he just may take the kid up on the offer. Every time Will comes, he sits by Billy for a few minutes and makes easy conversation before retreating to Harrington and plastering himself to the beta’s side so Max can be close to Billy, piping up to add to the conversation every now and again.

     Other times, instead of Byers, Steve brings the Henderson kid. This one’s loud and pushy, but it’s clear to Billy that this is Harrington’s pup. Steve looks at the curly-haired bastard with all the fond pride of a pleased parent, even when he’s trying to scold the pup. And the kid’s smart, he knows Steve would be hard pressed to actually get mad at him, but it seems he doesn’t really want to make the beta mad anyway – the bond between them goes both ways, that much is clear. They make an odd pair; Harrington’s on the quiet side, more reserved than the pup. Henderson can’t seem to stay quiet longer than two minutes, and he likes saying whatever comes to mind, almost painfully blunt in his mannerisms. Billy has to admire that a little bit, even if it irks him at times.

     Harrington brings the others too, sometimes, but for the most part it’s Max, Dustin, and Will. El will occasionally tag along, quiet and observant, her large eyes filled with kind understanding every time she looked at him, and Sinclair came by once to keep Max company. The kid’s still wary of him, and the alpha can’t really blame him, not in the slightest. Billy supposes he owes the kid an apology. He’s not good at those, but he’ll spit one out sooner or later. He owes a lot of people apologies – Max, all of her little friends, even Steve. Steve’s promises to be the hardest, because the guy’s got this obnoxious habit of being unbearably kind even when Billy’s a dick. Every day he’s come into this hospital he’s offered a gentle smile, a kind greeting, and brings him books to help ward off boredom when he’s on his own. Last week, the beta brought a bag full of yarn and sat there for a good half hour showing him how to crochet and knit. Billy, of course, bitched about it the whole time, because what alpha willingly learned that shit anyway?

     And, hey, if he now has a scarf in the works hiding in that stupid bag, who’s going to say anything about it?

     The answer is Neil, he knows. Neil would kick his ass if he saw the way Billy’s fingers nimbly dance with those needles, regardless of whether his son is sitting in a hospital bed or not. But the nice thing, if it can be called nice, is that Neil Hargrove hasn’t shown his face once in the hospital. Max told him that he came the night Billy was admitted, stayed until the blonde got out of the barrage of surgeries he’d underwent, and promptly left. And yeah, it’s sucky, but Billy supposes it’s for the best. Neil can drain a room of warmth faster than anything, and Billy’s uncomfortable already. And if he came and found Steve sitting there, the chances of being called a fucking fairy were higher than he’d like them to be, as well as the chances of getting the shit beat out of him. Sure, he supposes he can just tell Harrington to go, but the thing is the beta’s good at making the cold hospital room feel a smidge warmer. Billy isn’t sure he wants to willingly force that warmth out for anyone, let alone his father.

     Which is why Billy’s mad at him. It’d be easy if Steve was cruel to him, but the doe-eyed brunette is surprisingly soft. He’s got his edges, his eyes flash with a certain element of danger every now and again, but he’s overwhelmingly made of soft lines and gentle corners. And Billy isn’t sure how to respond to that most of the time. Today, however, crossing his arms as he stares at the beta and his redhead sister, he knows just the answer to give to Steve’s kindness.

     “Absolutely the fuck not.” Max’s sharp blue eyes are wide as she glares at Billy, unimpressed with the alpha’s stony expression.

     “Why not?” she demands. “Bill, you know you can’t come back home, it’s not a good idea for your recovery. Steve’s house is huge, you could avoid him all you wanted!” Her eyes flicker towards the man next to her, features softening for a brief moment. “No offense, Steve.” Steve smiles faintly in reply, hands raising up slightly.

     “None taken.” Billy rolls his eyes, lips pressing into a thin line.

     “Look, I’m not going to live with your stupid babysitter, Maxine.” His voice is a nasty growl, mean and sharp and fully intended to stop this conversation, but Max isn’t that easy to put off.

     “Can you stop being so stubborn?” she growls right back, arms crossing over her chest and teeth baring in a snarl almost identical to his. “I’m just trying to keep an eye on you, you dumbass, because I don’t want you to end up getting worse, and we both know you’re not gonna be able to recover all the way at home!” She’s so goddamn fiery, Billy gripes internally. She’s learned that from him, however, so he hardly has a right to say anything. If he has to put money on it, he’s almost completely convinced this kid’s going to be an alpha. Neil isn’t going to like that, and the idea sends a flash of worry through the blonde for a fraction of a moment.

     “And, what, you think I’ll do better with him?” His head jabs sharply towards the other man. “I’ll try my luck in my own damn house, thanks.”

     “Billy, please!” Max’s lighter blue eyes clash with his ocean hues, her face pinched and far too serious for any fourteen-year-old. “Look, I get it. You and Steve aren’t friends or whatever, but he said he’d let you stay – not live there, you don’t have to move in forever.” Max’s reasoning isn’t half bad, Billy has to admit. Her hands grasp at one another as she presses on, words tumbling over each other in their haste to escape her lips. “It’s just for a little while, just until you finish recovering, then you can come home. Just think about it!”

     “And you think my absence won’t be noticed?” he interrogates. Because Neil certainly isn’t going to react well to something like this. If the man finds out he’s staying with another boy, it’s going to lead to trouble for him and for Harrington. Max waves her hand frantically.

     “We’ll just tell him you’re still in the hospital! He won’t check, you and I both know that.” And she’s right, he does know it. Neil hasn’t so much as called, the chances of him deciding to do so anytime soon are slim to none. His sister’s eyes are staring at him wide and hopeful, and Billy’s too tired to fight her on the matter any further.

     “Don’t you and your stupid friends spend, like, all your time at his house?” he asks, shoulders dropping slightly. Max sees the move for what it is and grins broadly.

     “Well, yeah, but we won’t bother you! Promise.” Her promise isn’t worth shit, they both know it, and judging from Harrington’s knowing look, so does he. Billy’s icy eyes settle on the man.

     “You’re awful quiet over there,” he grumbles. Steve’s shoulders rise and fall in a loose shrug.

     “I wouldn’t have agreed to do it if I didn’t want to,” he replies. “It’s like Max said, we aren’t friends or anything, but she’s convinced you’ll get better faster at my place. If it means that much to her, then I’m game.” Billy’s eyes narrow as they consider Steve. Brown eyes blink back at him, wide and surprisingly kind all things considered. He really hates that. He hates that Max is so worried. He hates most of all that this is his best bet in all truthfulness. A heavy sigh escapes him, turning into a defeated groan as it draws out.

     “This is only until I think I’m better,” he relents, scowling at Steve’s relieved look and Max’s elated bounce. “I don’t give a shit what the two of you think, when I think I’m done, I’m done. And don’t think we –“ A hand shoots out to point at Steve warningly. “ – are gonna get chummy or something. I’m only doing this to get her to shut up.” The beta’s shoulders relax as he leans into his seat. Max, standing beside Harrington, grins broadly.

     “And I promise, I won’t say anything about it,” she relents. “You can come home as soon as you’re better again.” She moves closer to him, wraps her smaller hand around his, and squeezes, a hesitant smile on her face. This is another new thing about their relationship, the ease with which Max shows her affection now. Billy supposes that’s what happens when you almost die. And he likes it, really. Even if he’s been shit at showing it over the years, he does care for Max. He’s protected her from Neil for a long time, and she’s patched him up more times than he’s willing to count. Their dynamic has always been a strained one. But the way Billy’s seen it, his dad’s a bad alpha, and he’s always needed to step up and take that position for the pup.

He’s not sure he’s ever been particularly good at it, but he’s trying, you know?

     And so it’s settled that day. Billy’s going to move in with his high school rival, and he can’t make sense of it for the life of him.

     The thing is, Steve’s not really used to the idea of having a pack. Richard Harrington needed an heir for his company, and Antonella Bianchi-Harrington thought a baby would solve her marriage problems; that was the only reason they’d had a pup. Both had planned on a quiet, strong alpha son, but Steve destroyed that concept the moment he was born; of all the dynamics, only omegas could be spotted at birth due to their genitalia, and when Richard saw what his son was he nearly abandoned him in that hospital. Antonella’s maternal instincts demanded they keep him however, and so he was brought home; that was where her mothering ended, essentially. Growing up, Steve didn’t know that was the cause for his parents’ distaste for him. He knew they despised omegas, but he hardly knew what an omega was, and certainly didn’t know he was a part of that group. All he knew was that his father always looked at him with disgust, that his mother avoided him like the plague, that they never talked about dynamics except when Richard felt like sneering about omegas and boasting about alphas.

     Neither of them were home when a thirteen-year-old Steve woke up drenched in sweat, his leaking slick soaking the mattress, his abdomen cramping and his mind panicked and hazy. He suffered three days in that state, cried and curled up in bed trying to comfort himself. On the fourth day, he made his way to Melvad’s to purchase scent blockers, and that’s how he’s lived life up to this point. That day he presented was the day it clicked, the day he’d realized why his parents despised him.

     And the thing was, he couldn’t blame them, still can’t blame them. Male omegas are a rarity, and many people think of them as abominations. Those who ended up with women are seen as unmanly, and those who end up with men are called names Steve wouldn’t dare repeat in his own head, let alone out loud. Steve knew that before he presented, and he knows it now, so he’s kept his presentation a secret. As far as Hawkins is concerned, he’s just a beta, and he’s not planning on telling anyone otherwise anytime soon.

     But he’s got the kids now.

It was a matter of instinct; Dustin needed help, and so he helped. Max feared Billy’s rage in the Byers’ home, so he fought the alpha. Mike wanted a listening ear to rant about Nancy too, so he began letting the kid come over. He never meant to adopt the gaggle of older pups, but here he is, constantly scenting them and making sure they’re safe and comfortable. Will likes to joke that Steve’s become their pack omega. He’s not entirely wrong, but Steve’s not going to tell him that.

     And it’s the first time he’s been allowed to be himself, really. With the kids, Steve can just be an omega, he can worry over them and fuss and feed them copious amounts of baked ziti. Steve can let them curl up on his chest and groom their hairlines and listen to their troubles. He can mother them about and spoil them to his heart’s content. He’s allowed to give in to his instinctive need to nurture and care for and protect, and he’s beyond grateful because he can’t do this for other people.

     He especially can’t do it for Billy fucking Hargrove, if he wants to keep some sense of dignity. And that’s going to be easier said than done. He sits in his Beamer and watches silently as Max guides the familiar blonde out of the hospital doors. He looks good, Steve decides. He’s got a little limp, looks a little stiff, but he’s moving on his own mostly, and judging from the faint noise Steve hears and the annoyed, faraway look on Max’s face, his talkative attitude hasn’t taken a hit. The omega takes a deep breath and prepares himself as the passenger door is yanked open by Max.

     “ – Which is why I’m half-tempted to write to one of those big-time newspapers and tell them all about this shit,” Billy is ranting. Max looks ready to stab someone.

     “Can you shut up and get in the car, please?” she growls. The elder of the two alphas obeys without much of a fuss, easing himself into the passenger seat while Max deposits herself in the back.

     “Hey, what did those fuckers do with my Camaro?” Billy questions, his sharp eyes landing on Steve with an accusatory look. “You totaled my baby, Harrington, you might owe me a new fucking car.”

     “I’m not buying anyone a car,” Steve replies, throwing his car in reverse and backing out of the parking lot. The Camaro is sitting in Hopper’s driveway at the moment, Steve asked the chief to help him fix it after the mall incident, after learning that the other boy was still alive. The keys are sitting in a dish in his kitchen right now. But Steve’s not handing that thing over until he’s sure the blonde is capable of driving without keeling over and dying on the side of the road. Billy makes a face at him, narrowing his eyes.

     “Well, you at least owe me a pack of smokes, amigo,” he drawls, that stupid smug look creeping over his freckled features. Steve makes an indignant sound.

     “Are you fucking insane, Hargrove?” he spats. “You’ve been in how many lung surgeries and you want to smoke? Absolutely fucking not.”

     “Aw, you’re no fun,” the alpha groans, slouching in his seat and reaching out to lazily flick the radio to life. Steve’s eyes drift off the road long enough to glare at the other boy.

     “Stop complaining and put your damn seatbelt on.” Billy growls, but obeys again, switching the station to some garish rock music and turning it up loudly. Steve’s head is beginning to throb.

     “Hey Steve,” Max pipes up, “can we stop by McDonald’s?” He notes with interest the way Billy perks up at the mention of the restaurant. It’s been months since the guy’s eaten anything outside of the hospital’s shitty cuisine, he supposes greasy fast food sounds as good as a five-course meal in his grandmother's Venetian home right now.

     “Yeah, yeah, alright.” Billy’s master plan must be to drive Harrington crazy, because he begins chanting various menu items like a child as Steve zips down the road.

     To Billy’s credit, if that’s his plan then it’s working. Steve’s considering driving into the next tree he sees.

     He dishes out a stupid amount of money at McDonald’s; Billy demands four burgers, a hefty order of fries, and a huge milkshake. Max settles for one burger, and Steve orders chicken nuggets for himself, much to Billy’s amusement. He teases Steve most of the way home. The brunette throws a nugget at him at some point and Max laughs so hard she chokes on her root beer. Billy is blissfully silent after that, though he grins triumphantly as he chomps on the thrown piece of chicken.

     In a stunning turn of events, today is meant to be a kid-free day. Steve drops Max off at the Byers residence on the way home and cruises on into Loch Nora. Billy’s silence comes to an end with a low whistle. “Damn, pretty boy, I forgot you live in Rich People Central,” he muses. “I’m gonna get so bored around here, everyone knows rich people are stuck up as all hell.” Steve doesn’t feel like dignifying that with a reply, his hands flexing around the steering wheel instead. By the time they pull into the driveway of the Harrington family’s ridiculously large house, Billy’s openly staring at him, and the omega finds himself on edge. He slows to a stop in his long driveway, turns off the engine, and turns to meet that blue-eyed stare, his eyebrows arched upwards. Billy’s eyes are completely unreadable, he hates it.

     “Do you want a picture, Hargrove?” he deadpans. The alpha skips over the question and instead offers his own.

     “Shitbird says you’re here alone most of the time, that true?” Steve’s hackles go up faster than anything, his arms crossing over his chest as he glares openly at the boy across from him.

     “Why the fuck do you care?”

     “Never said I did, Harrington.” Billy holds his hands up in a placating gesture, before settling back in his seat. “Just wanna make sure I don’t wander into the kitchen one morning with my dick out and find Misses Harrington trying to enjoy her coffee or something.” Steve scoffs and rolls his eyes, getting a cheeky grin in response.

     “If I have to wake up and see your dick in the morning when I’m drinking coffee I’m kicking you out, Steve announces, getting out of the car. He hears Billy follow him up to the door, and once the two get in the shorter boy whistles again.

     “Your house feels like a fucking museum, Harrington, you really live in here?” Steve makes a beeline for the kitchen.

     “Yes, I do. And you do too, for the time being.” The brunette yanks the fridge open and grabs a bottle of soda off the shelf. “I let Max bring some clothes and shit over the other day, it’s all in the guest room down the hall on the right.” Steve pauses to give the boy a pointed look. “Do not go into the room on the left, nobody goes in there.”

     “Ooh, sounds ominous. What’s in there, all the Harrington family secrets? Family skeletons? Real skeletons?” Billy’s eyebrows waggle obnoxiously, and Steve rolls his eyes with a long-suffering sigh.

     “No, it’s my dad’s office. Nobody goes in there but him. And it’s where the good booze is, and I don’t need you drinking me dry.” Steve already did that a little over a month ago, nearly got alcohol poisoning during a bad night. hopper found him passed out by the pool and took the omega to Indianapolis to buy replacements; he doesn't think the chief will be too keen about helping out again so soon. To his surprise, Billy doesn’t offer any sort of reply, oddly silent behind him. Steve turns around, another soda bottle in hand to offer to the alpha, and finds him staring at the counter. At the dish on the counter. At the keys in the dish on the counter. The omega moves closer and swipes them up, depositing the metal in his back pocket. “You can’t drive yet, don’t even think about it.”

     “You have my car?” Blue eyes look around as if the Camaro might appear right there in the kitchen. Steve shakes his head, then nods, then shakes again.

     “It’s not here, if that’s what you’re asking.”

     “It was fucked to hell, why do you have the keys?” Billy’s face is completely serious now, his body leaning towards Steve’s intently. The taller boy frowns deeply and takes a step back, his eyes shifting away.

     “I, uh, well. Hopper and I fixed it up. Figured you might want it back. We had to repaint it, I don’t think the color’s exactly right, but it’s working now.” Billy’s eyes stare a little longer.

     “Why’d you put me in the room downstairs?” Steve frowns again, brows furrowing in confusion.

     “You’ve still got stitches in, and Max says the doctors said you shouldn’t go up and down stairs.” Large brown eyes blink at the alpha, who seems to be thinking hard about something, before Billy’s face twists into a sneer.

     “What’s your game, Harrington? Why are you doing this?” Steve hasn’t been this confused since high school math.

     “You needed a place to go, and I’ve got space,” he replies slowly. “It means a lot to Max, and if it matters to her it matters to me. Just wanted to be helpful.” Blue eyes narrow and he stares at Steve for a long time. The omega shifts on his feet awkwardly before finally holding out the unopened soda bottle. “You thirsty?”

     It’s meant to diffuse the odd tension, and it works. Billy blinks, looks between Steve’s face and the soda bottle before he shakes his head and takes the offered drink, all smug charm and general obnoxious snarkiness again.

     “Alright, alright. Gimmie the grand tour, pretty boy. I wanna see as much of the Harrington Mansion Museum as I can.” Steve isn’t quite sure what just happened, but he obliges easily and begins making his way down the hall, shaking his head in wonder. Maybe he sould have thought a little harder about letting his old rival stay in his house; this is already beginning to feel like the beginning of a very chaotic nightmare.

[geeky-writes]

The Phoenix Project - Story Preview

Superfamily, Alternate Universe

Clearing his throat, Steve squeezed Sam’s shoulder as he raised his glass in the air, nodding at Sam, Carol, and Bucky to do the same.

“To Riley,” he said, clear and true.

“To Riley,” the rest said simultaneously before all four of them downed the contents of their glasses. Steve grimaced as the sharp liquor burned its way down his throat, fighting against the urge to cough. He wasn't that much of a drinker, especially of the hard stuff, as Bucky liked to call it, but out of respect for Sam he hadn't protested when Sam had ordered five rounds of what had been Riley’s favourite brand of whisky.

“So, have you been out to see the kid yet?” Carol asked once she set her glass down, waving the waitress over for another. “How old is he now?”

“Yeah, I just saw him yesterday when I brought Riley’s stuff out to Erin. I think he’s six months now? Something like that. Looks just like Riley too, poor kid.”

“Mmm. And how’s Erin doing?”

Sam gave a shrug, downing his second glass of whisky so fast the waitress barely had a chance to set it down.

“Eh, you know how it is. The kid keeps her pretty busy, probably helps keep her mind off of things, ya know? Keeps her from dwelling on it.”

“Yeah, that’s what Maria always says too,” said Carol. “She calls Monica her anchor all the time, says she would've been lost without her.”

“Yeah, I guess I can see that.” Sam let out a heavy sigh, shaking his head. “I dunno, it all just kinda sucks though.”

“Yeah, it does,” agreed Bucky. “Kinda almost makes me wanna take a shot at them every once in a while. Let them see what it’s like for a change.”

“Yeah, but that’s the same kind of thinking that got us into this whole damn mess in the first place,” said Sam. “It’s not a matter of who shot first anymore, it’s all about who keeps shooting.”

“Yeah, well, tell that to Riley’s wife and kid,” Bucky snapped, slamming his glass down onto the table so hard that Carol jumped. “At some point you just gotta either say stop, or fight back. This whole constant patrolling thing is just a massive waste of resources.”

“Well, isn't that what this newfangled thing we're starting tomorrow is supposed to address?” asked Sam. “The next phase, or some shit like that?”

Carol scowled, shooting Steve a questioning look. “Yeah, I guess so. You okay there, Cap?”

“Oh, yeah,” replied Steve, plastering on a smile he had no doubt that Carol could see right through. “Just a bit tired, you know? I was at Ma’s house all last weekend trying to help her out. Her arthritis has gotten pretty bad lately, so I’ve been trying to fix up some stuff around her house to help make things easier on her.”

“Yeah, well, tell her I said hi next time you talk to her, okay?” said Carol as she glanced at the timepiece fastened around her wrist. “I’m already late to meet James.”

“Will do.”

“Yeah, I think I’m gonna get going too, Steve,” said Sam, nudging him in the arm. “I got some stuff to go over before we start that fancy new class tomorrow.”

“I’ll go with you,” said Bucky as he rapidly downed his third glass of whisky. “See ya tomorrow, Steve.”

“Sounds good,” said Steve. “See you guys then.”

As soon as he was alone Steve dropped his chin to his chest, gripping his head between his hands. He had been trying to hide it from his friends, but Riley’s sudden death seven days ago had thrown him for a pretty big loop, one that he hadn’t yet managed to shake. It had been just another routine mission, scouting the skies above Langara in the new X-301 aircrafts with Sam and Riley, something they had all done too many times to count, when, while testing out the banking arc, Riley had pulled back just a split-second too late, ending up just a hair over the hardline DMZ.

And the very moment the tip of his wing tripped that invisible barrier, the enemy’s automated anti-aircraft defence system kicked in and he was immediately taken out, the resulting fireball so blinding that Steve almost flew head-on into Sam before he was able to recover.

Steve shuddered as he recalled the searing heat of that fireball, and the shock that he’d felt at seeing someone he’d spent nearly every single day with for the last three years suddenly vanish, and being completely and utterly helpless to stop it.

It was like Sam had said; that they had been up there just to watch.

And now there was yet another Langaran test-pilot widow, and yet another Langaran child growing up without a father.

Just like he had.

It took him a few more seconds to realise that none of the others had bothered to leave any credits behind for their drinks, something that brought a slight smile to Steve’s face as he dug into his back pocket, peeling off the required number of bills and laying them on the table. He’d get them all back the next time.

In fact, if his memory was correct, and it always was, Bucky had managed to skip out on paying the last three times, something Steve would be sure to pass along to Sam once he saw him again.

Getting to his feet, Steve grabbed his worn brown leather jacket and slung it over his shoulder, checking his timepiece on his way out the door. It was only 1600, and since he’d already completed his aircraft double-check and filed his mission report for the day, that meant he had plenty of time to make one of his hospital visits before he returned to the barracks for dinner.

Outside the sun was shining, the autumn air crisp and cool as Steve mounted his motorcycle and took off in the direction of the base hospital, smiling as he felt the breeze whipping across his face and through his hair. He never bothered with a helmet, something he knew drove his ma mad with worry, but he had always rather enjoyed living a bit dangerously, and since he had been driving motorcycles even longer than he’d been flying aircraft, Steve figured he didn't need to worry about a helmet.

Especially since he had driven out to that hospital so many times he likely could’ve done it in his sleep.

“Hey, Sharon,” Steve said as he arrived on the paediatric floor, smiling fondly at the pretty, blonde-haired nurse sitting at the nurses’ station. “How’re you doing today?”

“Hey, Captain!” Sharon replied, shooting Steve a quick smile. “It’s always good to see you. How’s it going over on the flight deck?”

A stab of pain pierced Steve’s heart, one that he pointedly ignored. He didn't feel like talking about Riley’s death yet again.

“Oh, you know,” he said quickly. “Patrols and more patrols. I’m starting a new class tomorrow though, so maybe things’ll get switched up a bit.”

“Oh. Well, that sounds like fun,” said Sharon. “So, you here to see someone?”

Steve gave a nod. “Yeah, thought I’d stop by and see what Tyler’s been up to. Is he still here?”

“Actually, he’s not,” answered Sharon. “He finally turned a corner about three days ago and was just discharged earlier this morning. The doctors expect him to make a full recovery.”

“Aw, that’s wonderful!” Steve exclaimed, even as he felt a pang of regret. He had really enjoyed getting to know Tyler.

“I’m just sorry that I didn't get to say goodbye to him.”

“Yeah, especially with the nasty type of pneumonia that he had,” Sharon said with wide eyes. “Kids really are resilient, you know?”

“Yeah, they sure seem to be,” said Steve. “Is that why you love working with them so much? ‘Cause they’re resilient?”

“Oh gods yes,” Sharon said, nodding swiftly. “That, and they don't complain about stuff nearly as much as adults do.” She gave her keyboard a tap and grabbed another chart off the counter, one that was so thick that its binding was starting to fray. “There is another kid who just came in early this morning, though, and I’d wager that he would really appreciate some company. Especially from a hotshot pilot like yourself.”

“Oh? What’s his name?”

“Peter,” said Sharon. She tucked the chart to her chest and leaned forward, lowering her voice. “He’s got a pretty bad heart, poor kid, and when he came in this morning… well… if I ever have to see another kid’s face that awful shade of blue ever again, it’ll be way too soon.”

Steve winced, crossing his arms across his front. “How bad is he?”

“Pretty bad.” Sharon huffed out a sharp breath as she bit her bottom lip, lowering her voice even further. “I’m not really allowed to talk about his family, but… let’s just say that he needs a pretty expensive operation, but there’s a lot of mitigating circumstances out there that are muddying the waters. It just sucks because he doesn’t deserve any of it, you know? And yet he’s still the one that’s suffering for it.”

Anger welled up inside Steve’s gut, so strongly that it almost frightened him. He hadn't even met the child and yet already felt very protective of him. “Okay, but you're not saying that his parents—that they’re—?”

“Oh no, that’s not it at all,” Sharon assured him. “I don't think I’ve ever seen a more overprotective father than this kid’s dad. I mean, the only reason he’s not in there with him right now is because he was afraid that he’d get fired. It’s just… well… you know our government, right? I mean, you're around part of it every day, so…”

“Just the military part,” said Steve. “I don't really know much about what goes on in the civilian aspect.”

“Well… like I said. It all just pretty much sucks.” Sharon tilted her head, giving Steve a warm smile. “I’m sure he’ll perk up once he sees you, though. He’s a real sweetie, but he’s pretty down at the moment.”

“Well, then it’s a good thing I’m here,” Steve said. He tapped his palm on the counter, returning Sharon’s smile. “Thanks, Sharon.”

“Sure thing.”

Stepping down the hallway, Steve paused just outside the door to Peter’s room, his mind swirling with what Sharon’s cryptic words could possibly mean. What sort of mitigating circumstances could exist that would be murky enough to prevent a child from getting a potentially life-saving surgery, especially if he was as bad off as Sharon made it sound?

And she had only mentioned the boy’s father, so did that mean he didn't have a mom? Or that the mom wasn't involved?

Ultimately Steve knew it really wasn't any of his business, but yet he couldn’t help but wonder.

Inhaling a deep breath, Steve gently knocked on the door.

“Come in?” a small voice responded, weak and timid.

Stepping inside the room, Steve was greeted by a young boy, maybe ten or eleven years old, with probably the biggest and sweetest brown eyes that he had ever seen, partially hidden by a mop of brown curls that hung across his forehead. The boy’s skin was ghostly pale, nearly as white as the various bandages covering the three separate intravenous tubes, but he smiled kindly as Steve approached him, letting out a weak, wet cough as he raised his hand to wave hello.

“Hello,” he said, tilting his head as his eyes narrowed. “I’m Peter.”

“Hello Peter,” said Steve, attempting a smile. This boy was far, far sicker than Tyler had ever been, and Steve wasn’t quite sure he was comfortable with that yet. “My name is Steve.”

“Hi Steve,” said Peter. “You're not another doctor?”

“No, I’m not,” answered Steve. “I’m actually a pilot with the Langaran Air Corps.”

“Oh,” Peter said, eyeing Steve suspiciously. “Okay, so then why are you here?”

The prologue for The Phoenix Project will post on Monday, March 23rd, with new chapters posting weekly until the story concludes 😊

[editorialsonlife]

hello tumblr world its been a while since there’s been a proper update here so prepare for a dump and a half my friends because the last few weeks have been a fun trip (and that’s not even including the bloody US elections OMG)

we went to hawkes bay, so that was a good time. NOT. we turned up late because we slept in which was a great time. and also very fortuante because we arrived and no one came out to say hello which is terrible weird. So we start unloading the car and walking to the door and paul eventually emerged and was like, oh your mother’s just taking a nap we’re a bit tired. we only got home from the hospital an hour ago’. alaring for several reasons. 

the last couple of times this has happened, dave’s grandma died, his grandfather died, paul was in hospital for a suspected heart attack, paul had a heart attack & was flown to wellington for emergency surgery. let alone all the other family dramas in the intervening times. 

so it turns out that she threw her back out badly, fell over, and ended up in hospital when they couldn’t get on top of the pain with their sizable drug haul (pharmacist families man). didn’t think to text or call or give us a heads up in any way. when I asked why they wouldn’t text the response was, and I quote “Well she wasn’t dying so we didn’t think it was important’. like, fucking wow bitches. 

She couldn’t move without crying and groaning like she was in labour, she couldn’t move without a walker, she was on morphine, coedine, steroids and antiinflammatories, and still fucking miserable. 

poor dave was so stressed out. it was actually just a fucking horrible weekend. a) seeing another human in that much pain who utterly refused to do anything about it and still is

b) not being told the full story about whats going on, although I did read her medical discharge notes when they were both asleep 

c) seeing poor fucking dave stressed to shit because who the fuck knows whats going on and that’s his mum hes watching in so much pain. 

it was fucking horrible. never again. and walking into it with no warning was just the shittest thing of all. 

I was so fucking angry when we got home. like, ridiculous. I’m still raging tbh. guess who’s place we’re not going to for christmas?? 

So that was our five days of leave, and our holiday, once again shat all over (at least it wasn’t covid this time?!?)

got home on monday evening and went to send an email to work to be like hey homies not showing up tomorrow, need a day to recover to find out I had a client meeting at 830 the next morning I had to attend which was so  hard to get through. here, let’s pitch for 80k of work which isn’t going to solve any of your problems? why not. it makes me so mad. SO MAD. 

rolled through that and our team meeting and a colleague was like how are you doing? just about burst into tears so I peaced out of there. turned up to counselling on thursday, didnt even make it into the room and anne was like, you seem angry? I was like, mmmmm no, don’t think angry quite covers it mate. so that was great. 

got to last weekend, was meant to be meeting friends for brunch but there was a massive crash on the motorway so we ended up driving somewhere else which was an hour each way so that basically ruined the day but it was a lovely brunch anyway, had a great time. best smashed avo and lots of cuddles with little miss izz who is not so little anymore but so gorgeous!! Had a great day on sunday, finished off a bunch of work (yes, work is insanely busy right now, such fun, will be working again this weeked), got heaps of planting done, mowed the lawns, hung my artwork, finally felt like I was back on a happy even keel (fuck life is nice not having permanent anxiety) only to be sitting in a meeting on monday afternoon to find out homegrown is on the same day as our wedding. the second wedding since the first one was cancelled. 

I pretty much just lost my shit. honestly. why is it so fucking hard to just organise something to celebrate being married. legit feel like the universe is just fucking with us at the moment and like, did we even make the right decision doing all of this? because every time we try and do something it gets fucked over and its v stressful. and yes i know we’re lucky to be covid free and be able to plan these safely and everything else but like, honestly. I’m so over it. every holiday this year has been fucked over, the wedding was done, the family reaction was so shit, like, its just ridiculous. the worst part was I came home in rage mode and dave came home in problem solving mode and was like, we can fix this and like, yeah, i know we can, but like, I’m fucking sick of making do. It’s meant to be one of the best days of our lives, and we’re already onto plan fucking c for it, and just like, I’m done with it? I’m just done. I cannot be assed. I don’t want to email everyone, I don’t want to reschedule all this shit, I don’t want to reorganise all my hair appointments, I don’t want to have to worry about the weather and rebooking it all and dealing with all this fucking shit. I’m so done. I’ve done it twice already I don’t want to do it again. RAGE. anyway. survived monday night, the week did not get any better, work got worse, and the PMS hit fucking hard yesterday. cried before work, cried at the stupid 8am meeting, cried turning up to anne and was like, I have an hour to get this all out of my system before client meetings in the afternoon. 

and hot damn, god bless best friends, because bish messaged me and was like, lets do lunch homie, so we went to the botanic gardens and sat there and had the most insane conveersation ranking the best flavours of shapes, then biscuits, then crackers. and honestly, it was the pointless, best, most lighthearted discussion and everything I needed and I love her so much. 

all I can say now is thank fucking god it’s friday, and its the weekend, and we have zero plans beyond going to mitre 10. I’m gunna order all my christmas presents online this weekend adn get that out of the way. need to do a couple of laods of washing, hopefully only like 6 hours of work, but like, it’s gunna be chill. and I’m v relieved. 

she’s been a bit of a nightmare. 

HOWEVER

despite all this complaining, looking back on where I was a year ago, like fuck me i am in so much of a better place mentally and life is just so much better. I’m so relieved. and period binge aside, physically I’m getting better too so I’m gunna take it all as a massive win. week in adn week out its been a grind, and it’s been uncomfortable and hard and horrible at times but man, coming out the other side is such a relief. having capacity to do things like supporting a friend through her current nightmare and managing dave and dealing with all the work stress makes such a fucking difference honestly. it’s also nice to feel like I can manage myself better so I can look after everyone else better too. 

Feeling v grateful for this little life of mine, and the people in it, and for being in this little corner of the world. I don’t know how I got so lucky, but I am so so so so so grateful for it. 

[storyknitter]

“To you, Master Jedi.”

Hey, so remember when I wrote this angsty mini-fic and then @commanderlurker asked if Sanna ever found Theron’s drunken “I miss you, but you’re dead” message? (The answer’s “yes,” by the way. She totally did.)

21 ATC

Soft footfalls approached the War Table, where Theron studied the data retrieved from the Star Fortress formerly above Belsavis. A small smirk crept onto his face, recognizing Vassanna before she even spoke. “Hey,” he said, glancing over his shoulder. “What's up, beautiful?”

The endearment was still a bit clunky on his tongue, but her reaction was worth any awkwardness he might have felt: A flush crept into her cheeks and she caught her bottom lip between her teeth, a smile twitching at the corner of her lips.

“This hasn’t worked since they rescued me, and Lana said you might be able to help. Apparently,” she said, an impish grin lighting up her face, “I'm not the only one who reacted poorly to carbonite.”

His heart stopped at the reminder of how he'd almost lost her a second time, before he'd even had a chance to see her, hold her, kiss her again. He shoved the memory of those dark days aside and did his best to focus on Sanna: she was holding out a small, banged-up holocomm, an expectant look on her face, that smile of hers doing things to his lungs.

Dammit, he couldn't breathe when she did that.

“I’m not sure exactly how much can be retrieved or salvaged,” she said, “but I had some old messages saved that I’d really like to keep. If it’s possible, of course.”

Theron smirked and raised an eyebrow as he took the comm, trying to recover his balance. “What?” he asked, feigning disbelief as his fingers brushed hers. “A sentimental Jedi? Not possible,” he said, shaking his head.

Hurt ghosted over her features and Vassanna slipped on her Jedi mask. “Nevermind, it’s fine.” She reached for the comm, but he tightened his grip.

“I never said I wouldn’t do it,” he said, holding the comm above his head. “I was just giving you a hard time.”

She eyed him warily and he immediately regretted his retort – this must be more important to her than he’d thought.

“I’ll understand if it can’t be done. I won't hold you responsible if it never turns on again.”

“I’ll do my best, Vassanna. I promise.” And he meant it, even if he had to stay up all night to make it happen.

Sanna thanked him with a smile so bright it took his breath away again.

–––

That evening, Theron sat at the new desk in the Commander's quarters, pieces of holocomm and wires littering the space, and stretched the kinks out of his neck. He'd found the problem – a broken connection or four – and had finally managed the repair after cannibalizing parts from his spare datapad. The comm itself wasn't fit for daily use, especially with the days that Sanna always seemed to have, but as long as she didn't toss it around, message playback was possible.

Well, theoretically. He hadn't tested it out, but found himself hesitant to invade her privacy by going through messages deemed important enough to save during her years as a Jedi. Justifying the need to snoop (he had to be sure it worked properly after all), he chose a file at random, pressed play, and found himself face to face with an older Mirialan male covered in tattoos, his features pulled into a smile.

There was something familiar about his eyes...

"Happy birthday, Sanna," the man said in Mirialan. Theron's implants translated for him and he froze, curiosity warring with his conscience – he'd started calling her 'Sanna' after a few weeks on Odessen and hadn't ever heard anyone else use it as a nickname.

“I don't know where you are or what you're up to,” the man continued, "but I wish you many happy returns. I do hope you're enjoying this beautiful day with your crewmates. Here, the sun is shining, the winds are singing softly, and we're having your mother's sweetcakes in your honor tonight. But don't worry, Star-Blossom: I'll be sure to sneak one into the freezer for you. Though you know they only last for so long, so hurry home. We miss you, daughter, and–"

Theron turned off the message abruptly and glanced at the file's date. After a bit of mental math and cross-referencing her history, he realized this message was from when she was... off the grid. Vitiate's thrall, his mind supplied helpfully, his stomach twisting as he remembered her quiet, shame-filled confession just before she'd gone off to Wild Space.

Missed birthday greetings from the family she loved, while she was going through one of the worst times of her life – no wonder she had wanted to save some of these messages.

“How goes the surgery, doctor?” Sanna's voice came from the door and Theron startled, so lost in his own thoughts that he had missed her arrival. “Were you able to save the patient?”

The hope on her features did something funny to his stomach – he wanted to give her the galaxy on a string, to make her smile, to never disappoint her. What the hells was wrong with him? Focus Shan, he thought, irritated.

“Yeah. Yeah, I did, actually,” he said, trying to play it cool. “I wouldn't recommend taking it on any more missions, though – it's too fragile. I think leaving it on the desk is best.”

Vassanna gave him that damned smile again and before he could blink, she was in his arms, squeezing him close, her face buried in his chest.

“Thank you, Theron.” She glanced up, blinking away wetness at the corner of her eyes. “So much. I–”

Unwilling to see her cry, he kissed her, his hand curling behind her neck to hold her close. She tasted like caf and something sweet – juna berries, maybe – and the smell of her shampoo wafted past him. When he pulled away, he nuzzled her nose and excused himself, fabricating a meeting to give her some time alone with her precious memories.

He'd gotten as far as the War Room when something prodded at the back of his mind – he was forgetting something, something important. Then it came to him: the remnants of his extra datapad. He'd left a mess of connectors, processor parts, and wiring all over her desk, but he didn't think Sanna would mind too much. Just to be safe, he sent a quick message letting her know he'd tidy up the desk when she was done.

–––

After an hour or so, Theron arrived back at the Commander's rooms (which were also his, at this point, though it still seemed a bit odd), dinner for them both in hand. He knew she hadn't eaten dinner yet and was willing to wager good credits that she'd skipped lunch, too.

Knocking with the toe of his boot, the door slid open on its track and he saw Sanna sitting at the desk, entranced by a recording, her arm slowly drifting back to her side after opening the door for him with the Force. She met his gaze over her shoulder and stood up, her features unreadable – some combination of shock, regret, and something else he couldn’t quite put his finger on. Had she been crying? As she crossed the room, he saw a blue-tinged image of himself projected above the desk, a half-empty whiskey glass raised in salute and grief plainly etched on the hologram's features.

Shit.

Shit shit shit. He'd completely forgotten about that comm message. How drunk had he been that night?

Theron had no time to feel embarrassment or to worry about what she thought: Sanna took his face in her hands and pulled him to her, capturing his lips with a kiss – hard, demanding, desperate – as though trying to make up for lost time. Their sandwiches fell forgotten to the floor as he slid his fingers into her hair, loosely pulled back in a braid, and returned the kiss.

Breathless moments later, she leaned back, meeting his gaze. “I’m sorry,” she gasped out, eyes shining with emotion. “I’m so sorry. I should have been more careful. I promised you I would and then–”

Shaking his head, Theron gently rested a thumb on her lips. “Stop. It's...” It wasn't okay, but it wasn't completely her fault. And to be fair, he knew – he had known in his heart before she even left for Wild Space, before Ziost and Yavin – that she would have done everything she could to protect people, including sacrificing herself.

His stomach twisted, aching, and his head swam as though it were five years ago and Rineth Nabeshin had just shared Sanna’s parting words to him. Hells, he couldn't do this. The air in the room disappeared and he was drowning.

Five years. Five years. How had he made it so long? And how had he let himself get so wrapped up in one person, to begin with? And a Jedi, no less. An attachment-avoiding, logic-driven, practical, and self-fucking-sacrificing Jedi.

Well, maybe that description wasn't entirely accurate: she had been close with her family (before being trapped in carbonite, at least), saved old messages, and cared for people – cared for him.

A thought struck him, one that had crossed his mind any number of times since he’d met Master Vassanna Nabeshin – Hero of Tython and Upright Paragon of the Jedi Order – all those years ago:

“I’m so screwed,” he murmured as he pulled Sanna close. She was soft and sweet when he kissed her and, gods help him, this felt so damned right. She might be an optimistic, overly forgiving, stupidly self-sacrificial Jedi, but she was his optimistic, overly forgiving, and stupidly self-sacrificial Jedi, dammit.

And he didn’t plan on letting her go any time soon.

[theonewiththefanfics]

Incapacitated (one-shot)

Synopsys: When the Reader gets gravely injured, Sebastian is there to help her. When she goes home to London to recover, he flies over to ease her through the recovery. But that is not what friends do. And she can’t help but wonder what’s gonna happen between them.

Pairing: Sebastian Stan x f!Reader

Genre: fluff, lil bit of angst

Warnings: descriptions of injury (like graphic ones), swearing, implied stuff, but no smut (sorry if there are any grammar mistakes :) )

Word count: 4076

   Sebastian had never been as scared in his life as he was at that moment. He’d gone through leaving his home of Romania, he moved to a completely different continent, let alone state, had to adapt to a new culture, and when he became an actor, he had to deal with anxieties of getting a role and the thought of never having a stable job.        But seeing Y/N, his costar, friend and the woman he’d fallen in love with, plummet to the ground with only a thin mattress to soften her fall, eradicated every horrible memory that came before.        She landed with a sickening thud and crunch. A scream of her name rippled out of his throat. He didn’t even notice his feet carry him to where Y/N laid on her side, eyes closed and unconscious. There was blood slowly pooling around her, and when he finally made his way to her side, he saw why. Three ribs broken in half were sticking out of her body.        His whole body trembled as if an earthquake was happening. People rushed around them,- crew members, their friends, but most importantly medics. Some of them had faces of stone, while most people had a mirror of his own- pure and utter terror. Sebastian even thought he heard a yell of horror come from someone, maybe Evans, but he didn't know.        It was only when Y/N was lifted on a gurney and quickly wheeled to the ambulance they always had on set, Sebastian snapped out of it and ran after them. Luckily enough, he was allowed to jump in the car and go with them to the hospital.        The whole ride was like out of a nightmare. Y/N’s breaths were shallow and her pulse was rapidly dropping. She was hooked up to ten different machines, as tubes pumped all kinds of liquids in her, in hopes of saving her life.

       “Come on, dollface” Sebastian whispered, holding onto Y/N’s hand. Her knuckles were worryingly cold, but he hoped that his touch could give her some warmth back. “Come on dragă, stay with me.”        Suddenly his fingers were squeezed. The motion was so weak, he thought he’d imagined it, but when she did it again, Sebastian knew, she was there, she was fighting.

***

       The operation took more than eight hours, and that whole time he spent in the waiting area pacing around. When Y/N was finally wheeled to her room, he almost choked on his tears at the state of her.        “She’s stable, but given her extensive internal injuries, we’ve placed her in a medically induced coma,” explained the doctor wiping sweat from his face. “You can go in and stay with her, but please don’t overwhelm her. She needs rest to heal.”        Sebastian just blankly nodded and entered where Y/N laid motionless. The sterile smell of the clinic had settled in so far, he could no longer sense it, but when he fully looked at Y/N, his brain fully wrapping around how horrific this day had been, everything hit him all at once.        The lights were too bright now, the sheets draped over her body, too scratchy to his touch, the fluids being pumped in her veins in little drops- that noise was too loud as well. Everything was too much, and all Sebastian wanted was for Y/N to open her eyes and give him that amazing smile that took away all of his anxieties.        “Hey, dragă,” Sebastian said in a low voice. Somehow it seemed intrusive if his voice went anywhere above a murmur. “You scared us today… you scared me so bad. But you're safe now... You're good. So, take your time, just know, I’ll be here waiting for you to wake up, okay?” he kissed her knuckles, and wrapped them in his large hands, resting his chin on them. “I’m not going anywhere.”        Fortunately, he didn’t have to wait too long. After an agonizing week for everyone on set, crew included, Y/N’s eyes fluttered open at three twenty-two AM on her own accord.        “Hey there,” Sebastian breathed, a smile of relief morphing on his face. He stood up to lean over and brushed a strand of hair away from Y/N’s face. “How are you feelin?”        His heart thudded in his chest, mind still trying to process she was awake and conscious, and those Y/E/C eyes were looking up at him.        “Tired,” she rasped, her voice gravelly from not using it for seven days straight. “What happened?”        “Your wires broke midair.” Sebastian shuddered at the memory. “You took a, uhh, a horrible fall.” He had to bite on his bottom lip to not let the memories overwhelm him. “Broke three of your ribs completely in half. The doctors fixed everything but now you have metal holding them together. You also dislocated your hip and shoulder, and smashed in your cheekbone.”    Sebastian sucked in a shuddering breath, remembering the moment her wounds had been broken down to him, and how he had to actually sit down, or he would've fainted.        He thought she’d be horrified, upset and distraught, but Y/N, as if she hadn't gone through anything, snorted and shook her head. “Please tell me they were able to fix my face. I don’t care about anything else, but it's the money maker.”       Sebastian let out a teary laugh, putting their clasped hands against his heart. “I just said you had ribs sticking out of your stomach, and all you care is if your face is as pretty as it was?”        “You think I’m pretty?” Y/N smirked. She’d never say anything like that if she knew what was going on. The meds they had pumped in her body, gave her new confidence to flirt with the man she’d been crushing on for a good half a year now. The knowledge that she wouldn't remember anything the next day kind of helped, and also the fact he probably wasn't taking anything she spewed out of her mouth seriously, made Y/N throw all caution to the wind.        “I think you’re beautiful,” Sebastian murmured in the sincerest way possible. “Even when half of your face is blue and purple.”        Y/N gasped. “I’m putting Brolin out of his job. Oh, no, we can’t have that.”        Sebastian just rolled his eyes. “You almost died, and yet you’re still making joked.”        That made the smile dissipate. “Wait, what?”        He cleared his throat. “You uh… your heart stopped on the table… they had to give you emergency CPR,” a tear rolled down his cheek, and Y/N wiped it away. “Fuck, why am I crying?” he laughed. “I should be consoling you, not the other way around. It wasn't me in that... fuck!” he hung his head and pushed his forehead against their hands.        “ ‘S because without me your life would be dull and boring,” Y/N answered, trying to ease the pain in his heart.        A snort made its way into the air, and Sebastian shook his head. “Damn straight.”        “You know, even if things hadn’t turned out… good,” she bit her lip, “I would never leave you. You can bet your fucking ass on everything you hold dear, I’d haunt my best friend for the rest of his life.”        “Is that a warning?” he gave her a crooked smile and melted against her touch. She rubbed a soothing thumb over his unshaven jaw and smiled, tucking a brown piece of hair behind his ear.        “It’s a fucking promise.”        She spent four weeks in the hospital, going through routine checkups and another surgery, and all throughout that, Sebastian was by her side. The second he was done with filming, he’d rush to the hospital and keep Y/N company, no matter if she scolded him for not going home and resting or not.        Of course, the rest of their friends came to visit and hang out. They’d raced to the hospital as fast as they could the second Seb announced in the group chat she was awake, even though it was the middle of the night and some of them had filming to do that same morning. Y/N was showered in love and care and junk food, and she wouldn’t trade her new-formed family for anything in the world.        The Team, as they affectionately called themselves, stayed around for a bit, before Y/N scolded them and shooed them away to catch some sleep.        “Seb, you should go too. Get some proper rest. That chair couldn’t have been good for your back.”        “What, you calling me old?”        “No,” Y/N snorted, tightening her grip on his palm. They hadn’t let go since she woke up. “I’m saying you need to take care of yourself, as well.”        “ ‘M fine,” he replied, looking at the woman like she hung the stars in the sky. “You’re awake which means I’m good.”        “Cheeseball.”        “Yeah, but you love me,” he scrunched up his nose, and Y/N flicked it with her free hand.        In more than one way, she wanted to say but opted for an eye roll.

***

       That moment had been right there, and he’d let it slip through his fucking fingers. Sebastian sighed, running a hand through his hair.        “I really don’t want you to go.  You’re supped to be recovering, not flying halfway across the world and putting yourself through more stress.”        “I’m flying halfway across the world to recover,” Y/N replied, still sitting in her wheelchair. She had almost growled at the nurse when she’d said the woman would need it, but Sebastian had coerced her to follow the rules. “I’m going home, I’m gonna go through all the physical therapy and shit, get my life sorted, and in what- four-five months, I’ll be back on set. You have Mackie and Evans to keep you company so, you won’t be that bored.”        “It’s not about if I’ll be bored, it’s me worrying that you’ll be all alone.”        “Seb,” Y/N exasperated and turned around in the wheelchair. There were not a lot of people at the airport since it was the middle of the night so, they could have a little moment of their own undisturbed by fans or paparazzi. “I won’t be alone. I live opposite of Holland. Do you really think I won’t use him for my own gain? Are you kidding me? Imma bombard him with messages and make him buy me Domino’s every night,” she chuckled and scratched Sebastian’s jaw as he had crouched down to be on the same eye level.        “I’ll be fine,” Y/N said in a softer tone, as she wrapped him in her arms letting his nose be buried in her untamed hair. “Stop worrying about me.”        “Can’t,” he pouted. “You’re too much of an idiot and will somehow find a way to hurt yourself.”        Y/N slapped his back before retracting. “I’ll message you when I land.”        “And when you board, when you've landed, when you’re home and when you’re in the bed.”        She rolled her eyes, as the assigned airport team member wheeled her to the security check. “Bye, Seba! Don’t have too much fun without me!”        “Wouldn’t dream of it, dragă!” he responded. As Y/N disappeared behind the corner, he let out a loud groan of frustration and mentally punched himself. Another lost opportunity, and now he wouldn't get one for months. Fucking fantastic.

***

       It was a month into her recovery, and she was fairing pretty well. Tom and Y/N had movie nights every Friday as he had finished his filming a while before anyone else, so when he’d heard about Y/N’s accident, he had greeted her at Heathrow with a huge teddy bear and a basket of her favourite snacks.        “I’m gonna take such good care of you, even Sebastian will be impressed.”        She furrowed her eyebrows. “What does Seb have to do with any of this?”        Tom snorted as if it was the stupidest question of all time. “You’re his girl, and I think he’d actually start hating me if I didn’t help you."     ”I’m- I- ‘m not his girl… we’re just friends,” Y/N stuttered out, feeling heat crawl all over her form at the thought.        The eye roll Tom did was on par with The Rock’s signature one. “Sure, and I didn’t absolutely freak out when I got the call that I was Spider-Man.” He wheeled both of them out into the early morning air of London. “You keep telling yourself that,” he patted Y/N’s shoulder with a sarcastic smile before taking them to the car and driving to their apartment building.        Though tonight, despite it being Friday and Tom’s insistence that he stay in, Y/N had thrown him out of her flat.        “You’ve been taking care of me for four weeks. Go out to a club or something, get drunk with Harrison and be wild. Or I’ll shove a crutch so far up your ass, you’ll be eating metal for days.’       He hadn’t argued with Y/N after that. The last scenes of Keeping up Appearances played on her screen when a knock at the door disturbed her pizza munching.        With a groan, Y/N slowly stood up from the couch and grabbed her crutches. She knew it wasn’t Tom, given how he now had the spare key to her apartment, so there really wasn’t anyone else apart from maybe Harrison or one of the other Hollands that would knock on her door so late. Though once she opened it, Y/N’s breath got stuck in her throat.        “Seba?” her smile turned into a huge grin, and if not for her still healing injuries, she’d throw herself at the man. “What are you doing here?”        “What do you mean, what am I doing here?” his lips were pulled in a brilliant smile, and he dropped the duffle bag of his stuff right beside her door before scooping Y/N up in a hug. “I’m here to take care of my best friend. Besides, I missed you too damn much.”        “Don’t you still have stuff left to film?” she mumbled in the crook of his neck, and Sebastian shivered feeling her breath tickle the sensitive skin. If only she knew what that small act did to him.        “No,” he shook his head. “Finished my parts a bit earlier. Maybe we’ll be called back for reshoots, but until then, I’m here, and you won’t get rid of me.”        Y/N snorted. “As if I’d ever want to.”        And suddenly his heart beat a little faster.

***

       By that point, Sebastian had been taking care of Y/N for three weeks straight, and she’d be lying if she didn’t notice the little signs. How he’d look at her when he thought she couldn’t see him, how he’d let out a deep sigh, when Y/N would snuggle closer to him on the couch, and how his grip on her would momentarily tighten before letting go. Oh, and that one time he’d just been blatantly staring at her lips for a good two minutes, was the biggest giveaway that something was up with the man.        It was a rainy night, very similar to the many London experienced when they were on a group video call with the rest of the cast.       “You taking good care of our girl, Frosty?” Robert pointed a finger at Sebastian, and both Y/N and the man rolled their eyes in unison.        “I’m fine, Bobert,” Y/N laughed, calling the actor by the nickname he oh so adored… but not really. “Both Seb and Tom have been amazing at helping me. They get me to my physio, make me food and lazy around with me. What more could I ask for?”        The whole conversation she was safely tucked underneath Sebastian’s arm, body resting between his thighs, and as people slowly exited the chat, some being called away to film, some going to run their errands, sleep started to overtake her for it was nighttime in England. They said their goodbyes, and Seb closed the laptop before pulling her closer to his chest.        “You ready to go to bed?”        Y/N dragged a hand down her face and pushed her nose in the crook of his neck. “I’m so tired, I could just pass out like this.”        “Wouldn’t be the first time,” his voice was soft and gentle much like the fingers that carded through Y/N’s hair.        She sighed, enjoying his touch and the settled silence if only for a moment, but when her arms wrapped around his waist she heard his heart stutter.        “You okay, Seb?”        “Yeah,” he murmured, a hint on nervousness slipping through. “Why wouldn’t I be?”        “I don’t know. You tell me why your heart is going absolutely wild.”        Two big Y/E/C eyes looked up to see the man’s flushed face, and he turned his gaze away.        “Seb,” Y/N whispered his name, sliding up a hand to touch his jaw. “Seb, look at me, please.”        He didn’t.        “Seb, this is not what friends do,” Y/N murmured holding onto his face, trying to meet his gaze that he was so actively avoiding. “Friends call, they chat through Skype, message one another… they don’t fly across the fucking ocean to help someone get dressed or make a meal.”        “Maybe,” he finally started, a violent shudder moving down his spine as he locked eyes with Y/N, “maybe  I don’t want to be friends… maybe, I've finally realised how short life is, and that I never want to be friends with you... maybe I've finally come to the conclusion I could never live with myself if I had let go of that chance to tell you how fucking in love I am with you…”        Her breath didn’t hitch, but neither did her touch drop. “Maybe I don’t wanna be friends with you either,” Y/N whispered, two love-filled eyes looking straight into his soul, and a shy smile melting all his fears. “Maybe one of the reasons I've pulled through all of this shit is because I didn’t get the chance to say how fucking in love I am with this certain Romanian man, who makes me melt even with the simplest of looks.”        “You mean that?”        Y/N smirked, wiping away a tear that rolled down his high cheekbone. “Kiss me and find out.”        Sebastian’s lips were on hers in a second. He could’ve disintegrated at the euphoric feeling. When she kissed back harder, sneaking her tongue in his mouth through his parted lips, an involuntary moan escaped the man, but Y/N just pulled him closer, desperate to hear more sounds like that.        But then he pushed back. Instantly her eyes were open, and fear flushed her body at the thought that he regretted what had happened, but seeing the blissed-out state Sebastian was in, she relaxed a bit.        “Fuck, you have no idea, what I wanna do to you,” he groaned.        He didn’t need to say anything more to have wetness pooling between her legs. Hell, he just had to look at her and she could cum then and there.        “Then why don’t you?”        A sad snort escaped him before he looked at the girl. His calloused palm cupped her cheek, and he pressed a sweet kiss to her lips. “Because every time you walk, I can see the winces you’re trying to keep off your face. Because every time you sit down on the couch, I can still hear you whimpering in pain. And I don’t wanna add any more discomfort to that.”        She gave him a sly smirk. “Well you wouldn’t,” Y/N straightened out a bit. “In fact, I think you’d be doing the complete opposite.”        “Trust me, as much as I want to absolutely ruin you,” he breathed against her lips, and this time Y/N whimpered for different reasons, “I’d like to do it when I’m not afraid that a gust of wind might hurt you.”        “Okay, that’s over exaggerating everything.”        “I know,” he gave a small laugh, “but I just… I could never imagine causing you pain when all I want to do is make you happy.”        Y/N wove her hands in his hair and gave him a wide grin. “You do. You make me the happiest I’ve ever been.” She pulled him in for another passionate kiss, and Sebastian swore he was in heaven.

***

       The screams of people were deafening, as Y/N made her way down the carpet, posing for the flashing lights of the photographers. Her silver dress glimmered and so did her eyes. It was a long road to get there, but Sebastian was by her side every step of the way, and now, at the premiere of Infinity War, he was once again.        They’d made their relationship official while she was still in London, and barely able to walk, but it didn’t matter. Nothing in the world mattered apart from the two of them.    Together they had stepped out of the limo, and together they were celebrating this monumental moment. The only time Y/N and Seb were split apart was for interviews, though they weren’t far from one another even in those moments.        “First of all, congratulations of the movie. Talk about the event of the decade!” the blonde interviewer exclaimed, and Y/N laughed.        “I know, right? It’s insane. Just to think ten years ago, RDJ made this little film that no one really had any expectations for, and now it’s morphed into this behemoth.”        “It’s absolutely astounding!” she cheered, and Y/N nodded before returning attention to the questions. “How are you feeling? How is everything going since that nasty fall during shooting?”        “I’m- I’m good,” she let out a deep sigh. Sometimes it was still hard to think back on it. There had been a moment three months down the line when what had happened actually fully settled in, and Y/N had had a full-on breakdown. In fact, Sebastian had to coax her out of a panic attack, because she couldn’t breathe, and they spent the rest of the night clutching onto one another like they were the last pieces that tethered them to Earth.    She was still self-conscious about the scars that would now permanently adorn her ribcage, but every time Sebastian would drag his lips over the skin there, his stubble leaving an oh so delicious burn on the jagged skin, Y/N couldn't care less.    “Accidents happen, you know. It was nobody’s fault, and everything turned out fine. Besides, I had such an amazing support system during my recovery, like everyone was there to help me in any way possible, so when times I wanted to give up came, either Scarlet or Renner would give me a nice smack over the head, and get me back into the zone.”        The interviewer nodded along before her eyes flitted to Sebastian that a bit further down the line, responding to his own questions.        “We also heard, that a certain blue-eyed brunet was there to help you through it all,” she gave the camera a sly smirk before returning to look at Y/N, who had the most love-sick gaze a woman could ever have.        “Yeah, he was a- uhh- a huge part in me getting better… honestly,” she sighed, looking back at the other woman, “I don’t think I’d be standing here without Sebastian. He was my rock, as cliche as that sounds. He got me through the toughest of it, and now he's still with me, for whatever reason. He truly is an angel, and I have no idea what I did to have him in my life, but I'm so fucking grateful for it.”       The woman let out a huge ‘aww’ and smiled into the camera. “Honestly- we ship it." She turned back to Y/N. "Thank you, for stopping by, and once again, congratulations on the movie.”        Y/N gave her one last thanks and slowly walked off to where people were gathering to enter the theatre.        “You know,” Sebastian muttered sliding up to her side, and bringing Y/N closer by where he was holding on to the small of her back, “you might be playing a superhero in the movie, but you’re also one in real life.”        “Yes, well, I meant what I said,” she looked up at him and rested her head against his shoulder. “Without you, I wouldn’t be here. I love you, and I’m never letting you go.”        “As if I’d allow that,” he snorted and gave her a kiss full of love and adoration.        Little did she know about the ring that was sitting at the back of his sock drawer and would adorn her finger in two years’ time.

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