#like 3 times or something its insane
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a couple of mhy rain world ocs. these are the scugcats i have iterators too but eh
blue_screen, a rot slugcat who means very very well and also eats pearls
and the anchorite, a slugcat who grew up with a lizard. that lizard was killed by a vulture and never recovered, so it's trapped at karma 3 wandering and learning to let go
#art#this is literally all old art but its ok#the lizard was from a real playthrough but i had barely named him before he died#the name was also bad. rip cracker...#rain world#anchorite wears the mask without having to hold it! and is based off me playing spearmaster and getting the same damn king vulture mask#like 3 times or something its insane#blue_screen (underscore preferred) was just the guy i made for multiplayer and he really really stuck#oc
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kids when they hear that their dad is back in town VS. kids when theyre hanging out with a conman that accidentally stole their wallet once
im not even joking btw
bonus heres me being crazy about them in dms ^^^
#mob psycho 100#mp100#shou suzuki#sho suzuki#reigen arataka#i know sho doesnt actually BELIEVE his dad is back but even just that split second reaction is a weird one to have over your dad coming bac#he was like 'say sike rn... wait that aint right.'#shou watching them on the bottom floor while being isolated up in the corner at the end of the third stage play. and saying#'it's nice that they're so easygoing.' all wistfully???? im killing somebody#reigen calling him a poor thing and worrying about him DESPITE knowing his mischievous ways. ugh#gonna quote my reaction to clip rq#'bro [shou] heard him [reigen] talking about guardianship over children and making sure theyre safe over anything else and was like-#'this is getting too real for me i gotta make fun of him immediately.''#idc WHAT yall think to ME that was such a thick layer of defense mechanism that even though reigen's guardianship speech wasnt directed#at Sho he still felt the intrinsic urge to shoot back because of what hes experienced with people who are SUPPOSED to be protecting him.#would yall believe me if i told you i am totally insane#there are SO MANY THINGS. woven into their interactions that really enhance it#its totally silly! yes! but also! it is a legitimate ARC of GROWTH within their relationship! we watch as Sho starts off#with no trust in the man at all (although for a pretty good reason)#and over time he realizes hes NOT total shitbag#of course this doesnt mean hes completely vulnerable with him. its easy to infer that his distrust in certain people is formed from#a lifetime of being let down and incapability of dependency on certain trusted adults. his defense must be so heavily built up#even after gaining some sort of trust from Shou Reigen will NOT be exempt from his impish defense mechanisms.#sho will not make himself emotionally available as he would then be open to being hurt by someone else he thought could trust#his 'carefree and prankish' behavior is the wall between himself and such an intense feeling of disappointment and hurt and loneliness#but i like to think hes also just silly. hehe#man that stage play huh. shoots every fatal drug directly into my bloodstream#shou's trust and father issues VS stupid conman who has the common sense to not let children be beat up by grown ass adults. who will win.#i mightve forgotten something but. i think this is pretty packed full already so i am pleased. thank you for reading <3#meowmeow art
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28/01/2024
stars don't twinkle moon doesn't shine
big thanks to @nahrgles for finishing this for me after i hit a wall with colors bg and effects- chromatic aberration blew my fkn mind
pre edit transparent version under cut because i spent too much time cleaning it loll
#sonic the hedgehog#sth#sonic#shadow the hedgehog#shadow#sonic adventure 2#sa2#admin draws#fanart#not intended as ship theyre kinda just There but like if ya wanna tag it i aint stopping you#never played sa2 myself but ive been insane about these two for saur long now and thats like half the reason i even finished this#finished sonic generations though and i replayed this fight like three times omgfgghgh its so fun. i love them so much#those who follow my main blog mightve seen the piece by a long deactivated artist that inspired this#queue spat it out just around the time i finished this#sitting down to complete a piece that i dont finish in one sitting is rare let alone 2 (it took 3) and im pretty happy with it#still not ttoooottally happy but you just gotta let mistakes be and not ruin ur perception of a thing thats on the whole. pretty good#ive still got a bg3 wip in the works but i might have to doodle these 2 for sanity rather than sitting down after a long day#of studying infectious diseases for a final. and then making myself work on something ive wrung of most of its initial creative dopamine#MORNING EDIT WOW. THAT TRAILER HUH. 20 YEARS OF SHADOW RETROSPECTIVE HOW WE FEELING.#BC I KNOW IM ON CLOUD NINE NOW
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dug up my oldddd tiny wacom i used to draw with as a kid </3
#rdr2#john marston#javier escuella#jovier#my art#im NOT used to screenless tablets anymore lol#but i love keyboard shortcuts i lvoe keyboards shprtcuts so much#also krita wins best program because.i can make it pink#these are just some basic sketches i want to try to come up w something thats actually.. something at some point lol i just dont have time#rn#but these two are my forever girlfriends#im trying to figure out a way to stylize them more i want to give them some flavor lol#also i.might be insane but i feel like.. i kinda dont like the feel of the apple pencil#i looked up thid wacom im using now its from 2013 and like. the pen feels so.much nicer to use#but everyone on the internet seems to love the apple pencil#idk.man#maybe its bc my ipad doesnt have a laminated screen and im using the older pencil#anyway the ipad is still a lot more convenient#ok thats enough yapping from me there u go 🤲#think havent been this annoying in the tags in a while so i had to fix that right#<3
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sekai au 👊😔
#my post#hatsune loopku.....#isat#in stars and time#isat siffrin#isat loop#I was SUPPOSED to make a modern au but look. where that got me#prpject sekai.....#hsatsune miku......#woaw.........#I haven't planned this yet. I just wanted to draw loop with Miku's pigtails really badly because I came up with the shape idea and went lik#ogguuguuuuGUG#oh bell yeas#actually well I have a little#small group of college students who met via tutor group (by odile) that turned into a book club and maybe band?#they would all suck playing instruments honestly#I made it a sekai au because I needed loop to go SOMEWHERE and went insane trying to figure something out till I finally went fuck whatever#fine#siffrin made a sekai and loop is there. fine. whatever. fine. yeah. fine#I don't know how the timeloop will come in.#I cant have both a timeloop and a sekai at once.#I would forget the other exists#and focus all on one#or it would be too much at once#also its kind of hard to do a timeloop like the one in-game in a modern way?#there's no good rocks to be crushed by that aren't like a collapsing building anyway#OH OH also this might be the last project sekai related art you see for a WHILE#this game hit my brain worse than project sekai I'm so serious#I've burned through almost all of my sketchbook and there are three(3) drawings that aren't siffrin#THREE.
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with the obvious addendum that act 3 isn’t out yet and we can’t form true opinions until the show’s officially done, i’m still really feeling like it could have maybe benefited from a third season. they’re hitting all the right plot points and those moments are full of really intense emotion, but everything in the middle feels so underwhelming in comparison and so much of it still feels rushed to me. idk
#arcane#arcane spoilers#i could kinda deal with it act 1 bc there was a lot to cover through the fallout after s1. but act 2 i'm reallyyyyyy feeling it#like dont get me wrong it's still so so so good#and i guess that's what makes it so much more frustrating#like you can see all the ways it can be just that littlest bit even better#but i guess if the biggest complaint viewers have about your show is that they want more then that already says a lot you know#anyway#it's the warwick / isha plot that bugs me specifically bc isha (love her to death) feels lowkey like a cop out#introduce a kid just to heavy push the 'cycle of violence' 'find your humanity again' character arcs only to kill her six episodes later#like EVERYONE was saying 'ive never seen a character so obviously created to die'#the subversive thing would be to have her live and show the cycle of violence is ending or something#but here's another broken kid killed by the system here's more proof that jinx is. well. a jinx.#idk idk idk#and warwick. i wanted so much MORE#heavily build up warwick all through act 1 just to have him die end of act 2#we barely got to see him at full power.#we barely got to see him with vi and jinx.#we barely got to see him reckon with the man he was and the monster he is now.#we got next to nothing before he's just dead. again#and again those scenes hit SO GODDAMN HARD. THEY ARE GOOD. but they couldve hit even harder if they just had more time to flesh it out !!!!#but again again no act 3 yet so who goddamn knows at this point#they aint dead til we see the bodies and even then they might not be dead bc thats just how arcane works#but fuck i just wish we sometimes had time to sit and FEEL things before the next new thing starts#ok im done rambling i just had to say something somehwere because its driving me insane#my posts
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starting to feel my enjoyment of cooking seeping back in after a long period of intense burnout that had me really slogging along preparing meals with gritted teeth for a good month there. i credit the return of this spark to the much needed break i took on our 3 day vacation that resulted in us eating solely theme park food. while delicious, in all its greasy overpriced glory, i found myself missing the kitchen. so last night for dinner i made heavily spiced chicken wings with crushed peppercorns and garam masala that rendered slowly in its own fat while roasting in the oven, resulting in flavorful charred crisp skin and a really juicy bite. we picked them clean over steamed rice with lime and scallions. i also baked a loaf of marbled pumpkin and dark chocolate bread yesterday for my neighbor as a thank you for doing me a favor last week. it looked delicious. the crumb was tender and plush and velvety, the spiced ginger molasses pumpkin batter swirling alongside the bitter dark chocolate espresso batter, with puddles of dark chocolate bubbling across its top. it looked so lovely i whipped up a second one for us to have for ourselves that's in the oven now, i think it could be a really good breakfast pastry for us this week.
#ugh it feels sooooooooo good to be enjoying cooking again#it was so bad the last like month or so i just#have been sooooo burnt out#it's genuinely insane what a 3 day vacation can do to reset you :(( it makes me sad lol#i wish that everyone could rest to their hearts content forever#i think i am someone who is extremely prone to burnout and i need about quadruple the amount of quiet alone resting time#that the average person does#so when i get burned out its like excruciating to pull myself out of it again#but im also the primary cook of my household so there isn't really time to take a break and recharge and find my joy for it because#we have to eat lol#3 times a day#every day#forever#BUT#i am feeling so much better about things now after making that dinner and baking a little bit#its feeling soooo autumnal around here lately too which helps#the changing of the seasons is so good for my cooking motivationg#idk#i was feeling pretty depressed that i was starting to resent cooking for a while there since when i enjoy it it's like#life-giving#soul sustaining#wonderful hobby that gives my life purpose and meaning#and it was breaking my heart that i wasn't feeling that way anymore#but i can feel myself coming back#writing about food helps me too#something about describing it#and sharing it with other people who are delighted by it#makes me enjoy it a little extra#sigh#i feel like im returning to myself finally !!!
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i've just been informed a third sonadow bridal carry has hit the towers
#PRIME IS CRAZYYYYY FOR THAT i respect the hussle#they said we arent satisfied just giving you sonic carrying shadow#we gotta give you shadow carrying sonic too#and from what i can tell its like. sonic is fucking dying or something and shadow is racing with him in his arms#trying to get him somewhere HELLO????? this is like actually insane#i still need to finish season 2 😭😭 but now that im back in a sonic mood and season 3's coming out next month#its a good time to do so#serena.txt
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It is kinda funny seeing people talk about Seungmin lately because he definitely has gotten more bold and confident for sure. He's also just getting opportunities to be perceived as an individual on his own as well for the first time in a while but it's still jarring to see people be like Aw he was always such a quiet goodie two shoes little nerd and it's like...... he was the one to leave and seek out his own vocal coach and blatantly talk about it, which of course lead to I.N and Lee Know also doing the same, he was the one to go on bubble and tell off sasaengs who used to camp outside their old dorm for invading members privacy but also because it effected other residents and staff at the complex, something that i'm certain upper management wouldnt have been happy about, and he wasn't curt or nice about it either. like he's never actually been a wallflower, he's always had a pretty strong backbone and seems to stick to his principals, its not really new.
#even silly shit like bringing up drinking even tho staff has clearly told him not too#like yeah its silly but its still sticking to his guns of being like we arent actually children anymore thanks#the food thing too like in an old 2 kids room he said something about not being able to eat on his bday bc they were filming so evidently#there was a moment in time when he caved to the shitty diet obsession kpop had but ever since hes never really said anything like it again#instead hes telling everyone to eat well and reminding people to have dinner or lunch every other day#even the comment about growing his hair out but then being like lol the stylist probably wont like me saying that or whatever#and like the yeah im going to the gym but im not lifting. dont expect me to bulk up. im doing it for stamina<< that made me cackle#bc i did see people on twt being like but what if seungmin got buff tho omg hed be so hot 🥺 Well him bein buff isnt what this is about#so he went and made sure people were realistic. not everyone needs to be noticeably cut yk#idk maybe bc i watched most all the skz content all the way through#and now i go back and gif stuff i notice patterns more easily than if youve been here for longer and havent watched older stuff#for a while- maybe? idk its just funny but i also see takes a lot and have to stop myself from going No <3#anyway this is my obligatory insane ksm tangent of the week. see you in 5 minutes.#🐶
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i get super calm whenever people illustrate/depict the loop transformation. just kidding im absolutely fucking lying. and i need people to keep doing that
#isat#isat spoilers#in stars and time spoilers#bee babbles#genuinely makes me SICK#like. i like body horror but with loop it does insane shit to my brain.#just . GOD there r so many ways to depict it but its just so visceral#and ik classic body horror is like blood and guts or whatever and thats cool but like#imaginging the star just burning them from the inside out and morphing them into something achingly similar but So Far Off#i can’t articulate it thats what the writers and artists are for. but just know it makes me fucking crazy#keep doing what youre doing guys#sorry for the tag spam oops. im normal#my friends have had to hear this shit like 3 separate times and im equally hysterical each time
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han solo wants what atton rand has
#AND THATS A FACT#guys pls play kotor 2 and see my vision#atton deserves a romance questline with as much depth and length as astarion’s fr#and also an option to be an evil power couple#i will fund the kotor remakes and kotor 3 myself if i have to#its the way i didn’t even know he existed when i started playing#but then i fell in love#like he’s an extremely close second to anakin#‘they can’t hurt you bc you’ll be right here with me playing pazaak’ AND THEN THAT BEING BASICALLY THE LAST THING HE SAYS#obsidian partner with larian studios and bring kotor back and my life is yours#i deadass wrote fic about my mc and atton after playing#star wars#knights of the old republic#i havent played the restored content mod but even then its like……. i need something more#a fictional star wars situationship really had me crying bc i wanted a better ending#kotor 2 is so interesting bc i loved it#but whats great about it sometimes reinforces whats bad about it#that being the cut content and the sometimes apparent lack of substance in spots#i shouldn’t have been an infant when kotor 2 was made i shouldve been in the writers room#i need him i need him i need him#‘you have a husband?’ oooooooooooooooooooh#i just think seeing the kotor games with the graphics of something like jedi survivor would be insane#fav#i could talk about this game forever i beat both of them in the span of like about 2 weeks i was obsessed#my nerd ass loves star wars sm#like lets keep going back in time i rlly dont care about the ‘modern’ star wars era#and theres an easter egg line where atton calls you an angel even though he says hes joking#ahhhhhhhhhhhhh#genuinely down bad#📜.scrolls
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It cannot be understated just how unwell Striker has made me since December 2021, this goofy sadistic snake cowboy has completely altered my brain chemistry in a way that I have never been able to recover from
#like ik already post about him the most when it comes to HB#but guys you do not understand#outside of my tumblr i never stfu about this man#he’s in my brain constantly#and has been since December 2021#AND ALL WE HAD OF HIM AT THAT POINT WAS HARVEST MOON#LIKE INSANITY FR#November 2022 tho was the point of no return#like that was when i realized just how bad my brainrot got LMAO#once i had that realization there was no going back#and then in 2023 we got him in two episodes and a song#the stars aligned or something idk its so funny#no merch tho absolutely TRAGIC#its okay fan merch and concepts are EATING#the grip this silly snake cowboy has on my psyche needs to be studied#like i havent had brainrot about a character this badly in FOREVER#also if i had a nickel for each time i was able to use this meme format i’d have 3 nickels#helluva boss#helluva boss striker#striker helluva boss#ALSO HAPPY VALENTINES DAY#THIS IS MY VALENTINES DAY POST#JUST *HIM*
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undertale yellow. clutches head in anguish.
#[cherry on top]#undertale yellow spoilers#[..its still you]#anyways. finished my uty playthrough yesterday. oh my god.#^ that might be a bit of a surprise given that ive said like. nothing about it on here#but honestly i felt like positive-neutral about the game for most of it. like yeah it was good;#but nothing that drove me crazy. yknow? it was just an overall good game.#which is why i didnt really say anything about it#then it started picking up near the middle-end with the steamworks-#i enjoyed axis and guardener a lot; ceroba was a cool party member;#and the music in steamworks goes hard. one of my favorite tracks tbh#then there was the buildup to cerobas fight.#then i /got/ to cerobas fight and. crumples up into a ball AAUUUUUUUUUU#OH MY GODDDDDD#something about it made me shatter into a million tiny pieces.#a lot of things did actually. like how HARD IT WAS#i was stuck on her for OVER AN HOUR#BUT I DID IT. I DID IT LEGIT. IT WAS SO SATISFYING WHEN I FINALLY BEAT HER#god im just insane about ceroba rn. women who fuck up everything big time#and see no other option other than to dig their hole deeper because they sure as hell arent getting out of it#OH AND THE ENDING... BECAUSE OH MY GODDDD OF COURSE CLOVER WOULD DO THAT AHUGHHHHH#THEY'RE THE JUSTICE SOUL. THEY WANTED TO BRING MONSTERS TO JUSTICE AFTER ALL THEY FACED#OF FUCKING COURRSSSEEEEEEE AAAUUGHHHHH <- wail of anguish#KILLING AND MAIMING AND BITING.#SORRY. i needed to lose it for my mental health. quoting that one tiktok: 'im craeezay. im insaaane!'#for other tidbits i wanted to mention:#cerobas bossfight music went HARD. i fucking love the phase 3 transition especially with her yelling as the music starts;#that black hole attack can go fuck itself;#and if you were wondering how long it took me to beat uty. it was around 10-11 hours for a pacifist route.#anyways i totally need to play more games. that was fucking awesome and i need to experience more things like that
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da*2. is a game
#more thoughts below here be warned. i really enjoyed the introductory sequence and how it juxtaposed varric's dramatized version with the#real sequence of events. i also enjoy how they tied in lothering. imo id say the game has a really solid start. i also really enjoy the#visuals and stylistic direction of the game- i'd even go so far as to say i largely prefer it to inquisition (its just the oilyness LMFAO)#esp with the qunari and how they look.. less so with the proportions of the elves* (something that really irked me in inquisition is how#harold is forced to have the very clearly downscaled proportions while the elvish npcs (solas sera and basically every other elf#you interact with) dont have the slouched shoulders and very? crumpled looking frame). dont like that youre forced only to play as a human#though its very obvious that they were not given a reasonable amount of time to actually finish the game because OH MY GOD the reused#locations. the story was fairly solid at the start but the game is incredibly short (im in act 3 at the end of 2 days of playing) esp in#comp to origins. everything feels vaguely disconnected in a way thats uncharacteristic of bioware with the context of having played dao dai#and some of me1. and introducing the timeskips did Not help. i can see why people got absolutely attached to the companions however#with the system of friend + rival and it producing dichotomic benefits. rivalmances apparently existing also creates a really fun way of#interacting with your companions. i like anders#anyways completely unprompted thoughts on da2 over thank you for your time (i just needed somewhere to put them or i would go insane)
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you guys have no idea how much i think about the malice champions (the game calls them "hollows" and thats quite frankly terrifying)
#blbllblblb dark reflections of the self and body horror go brrrr#oh they are from aoc if you didnt know. first show up in korok forest (chapter 3 part 1 i think)#they should have had so much more screentime than they did#horrifying concept 0/10 do not like the implications#wish you had been more explored by the narrative#hey so do you think astor could just make malice copies of anyone or is it something special about the champions (and their#link to the divine beasts assumably) that sets them apart#bc like. residual malice in the divine beasts from the first time sending messages back about how to beat the next set?#but maybe not bc iirc he could copy link before he pulled the master sword so its not any sort of godly connection#prolly a combination of “strong spirit makes strong hollow” and “best way to defeat the enemy is for them to do it themselves”#but like gah the angst potential of the champions running into their own hollow- or worse someone elses#(and not realising at first smth is off. korok forest is known for playing tricks on the eyes and the mind)#could you really strike at your fellow champion? your friend? your possible love interest? (if ur insane like me)#anyway they also should have been utilised in the corrupted divine beasts but thats just me and my angst loving heart#(i would have cried so much its probably for the best they didnt. wont stop me tho)#the champions#botw champions#botw#aoc#moss' madness
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tomorrow uni starts again and surprise! i'm terrified. i start archaeology this semester and tomorrow i only have one welcome event so it won't take very long but i'm scared that i will be alone again while, through some sort of magic, everyone else becomes friends instantly. or like it happened a bunch of times in my previous courses, i come into the room that is supposed to be filled with ppl that dont know each other and still everyone is basically part of a group already, happily chatting, except for me. and then i feel like the little girl again that no one played with lmao. i literally cry when i think about it too much, i have to hold back tears a lot when i'm on the train on my way to uni, because my inner child is apparently not very healed lol. at least i dont cry in the situation itself, because i'm so stressed and tense that i cant show emotions like that. i tried to make myself really approachable the last year and be very friendly (while still trying to be myself) and still ppl seem to clock from a mile away that there's something wrong with me. and also i feel like ppl (esp. my age) just refuse to put any kind of effort into conversations both on whatsapp and irl. like i was looked at as if i had grown a second head just for saying hello to someone, girl just say hi back wtf. and then the rest of this week (and the rest of the semester will be the same) will be hard af too for me. i'm so tired of feeling like this and i do just try to be myself but i can't bc i have to mask so hard, otherwise i would just stare at the ground with a blank expression and look like a psycho bc once i get there i'm already completely overstimulated and zoned out i fucking hate that these things are so hard for me
#if it just came to the academic effort (exams papers etc.) i could probably finish my bachelor in like 3 semesters lol#the fucking insanely hard thing is the social aspect of it for me i hate it so much#and i thought it will surely get better with time and practice BUT IT DOESNT#i think it has actually gotten worse#bc my brain doesnt go “oh that wasnt that bad” after i got through something it rather remembers “omg that was an awful experience for my#body bc it was in extreme stress mode for 5 hours straight. i really dont want this to happen again" and then it does happen again and agai#and its the same awful experience physically everytime#i really need smth that intervenes with my physical symptoms#personal
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