#like ...there was always that what if feeling but id always put it aside bc yeah better not get hurt again

[kiss-me-muchoo]

𝐝𝐢𝐥𝐨𝐫𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐭𝐞 || 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐚𝐥𝐞𝐬𝐦𝐚𝐧 𝐱 𝐟𝐞𝐦!𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐫

summary_ when you declined to play Ddakji with a man, the least you expected was him stalking you, even less expected when you oblige him to lick your bleeding wound after seeing him kill a man and escaping him.

warnings_ MDNI, age gap (not specified but legal) reader is a foreigner (implied American but not specified again), stalking, blood play, dom!salesman, switch!reader, toxic till the end, sexual innuendos, manipulation, questionable morals, do not romanticize this irl pls, NO PROOFREAD YET

notes_ I’ll just drop this fic and leave it there bc why am i feeling so horny for an Asian sociopath? me la estoy pasando bien raro (i like it)

♫ ♪ the worst playlist 4 this man

✰ Index (+ fics here)

ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈

Everything was irritating. The class you had was canceled last minute, the crowd at the train station was loud, the tapping of a kid in a window was constant, and the message you received asking for your campus ID to keep using your student account was sudden and required immediate action. Your cramps and migraine only aggravate everything.

You were steps away from the stairs when you stopped to take the damn picture of your ID and be done with that. But of course, you couldn’t find your wallet at first glance, so you moved aside to take a better look.

You worried about kneeling and ruining your black coat with the dirtiness of the floor at the station, but at the same time, you thought it was just stupid.

A trail of curses flooded your mind as you tried to find your wallet, making you oblivious to a random man walking in your direction.

“Excuse me, Miss… Would you like to play Ddakji?” Said the man asked you in Korean. You were occupied with a hand inside your thrifted designer tote, and your mind unconsciously prepared an answer in English.

“Sorry, I don’t have time” When you realized your mid-answer you sighed, just as you fished out your wallet. “For every win of yours, you’ll earn a great sum of cash”

Once you stood up, you met the face of the man who now answered in English as well. Very tall, handsome, innocent smile and in a suit; a businessman. You knew it was wrong to judge but there was something behind the smile he offered you that resulted eerie.

Like behind that seemingly blameless expression, the man was hiding his true intentions.

Might’ve been your eyes or hair that caught his attention. You weren’t native, and he didn’t want to think he could take advantage, yet his feet dragged him to you.

Placing your bag over your shoulder again, you grab your glasses and phone with tangled EarPods. You give the man one last look. You are not having a good day and you don’t have time to deal with this.

“What do you say?” He asks feigning kindness, eyeing you subtly without your knowledge.

“No, thank you. I don’t even know how the game works”

“You look like you are a natural. You might be surprised if you try. You just have to pick a color and try to flip the opposing tile”

The rich always trying to fuck the one who isn’t. This was just a new way. The urge to roll your eyes grew but you remained still.

“Look, I’m sorry. But I bet you do this just to see how desperate people who need money can go. I won’t be one of them. If not, sorry for misjudging you” you harshly say before putting on your EarPods and leaving the station. You leave him perplexed, huffing in disbelief and igniting a fire of curiosity inside him.

And you completely forgot about the Ddakji man as you made it to your little apartment, not knowing he would turn upside down your upcoming days.

…

Warm days in winter were exciting for you. They boosted your energy and made you want to be out all day.

You had the luck of living in a beautiful complex because it was once from a friend of your mother who married years ago and now had her single apartment for rent.

It had long warm hallways that hosted at least eight apartments by floor. With orange and pink subtle lights and uneven edges. It was truly a sight despite how little the apartments were. One bedroom with closet and bathroom, a tiny studio, small kitchen, enough space for a dining table, another small bathroom, and a half sized living room with balcony.

Your loneliness was well-balanced because you loved your home. But even on warm days, you wanted to be out.

Your red shoes contrasted with everything you stepped on. You carried a bag with a bunch of books and another one with thrifted clothes you bought.

At the park you always walked by, there was a fair amount of people as usual. You don’t care much to look around but someone makes you stare longer than needed.

The same man who asked if you wanted to play a game at the station was in the park. Another impeccable suit dressing him, looking attractive like the first time and already looking at you.

He offered you a smile, to which you didn’t reply. You looked at the ground, feeling like you had frozen.

What a weirdo, he offered bread and a random paper to a lonely man.

Simultaneously, you wondered if the man found you attractive enough to stare like that. With your mind that often became nihilistic, you thought you were delusional and that you should just keep walking.

His eyes remained glued to you. As his prey was thinking about what was better to choose, he contemplated you walking again.

The salesman realized he had made you nervous and that made him feel eager to end his job and follow you again.

Once he realized you lived in a good neighborhood, where his elegant suits matched the vibe, he got even more excited to see you again.

So now, was like it was meant to be.

How sweet, sophisticated, and innocent you looked.

Something shifted, as you passed by his side, only having a view of his back, you assumed he was worked out, his hair looked perfectly fine, and his big hands offered two things. Perhaps you had misjudged him and he really wanted to help. But your inner voice said otherwise. In a sudden change of events, you decided to look back once you were almost at the exit of the park.

With his deep gaze still set on you, your lips formed a smile.

And he took it as a first win in the games that had begun between you two.

…

Once again, you find yourself in the library. Inside one of the biggest malls you’ve been to, you are leaning at a counter, asking if they have an English translation of a book you were interested in.

Your Korean isn’t good enough yet, so as the nice librarian disappeared to find your request, you are working on your next reply, with a translation app.

“Do you recommend me this one?” your back arched as a startled reflex. You quickly stand straight and turn around to see the person you grew anxious to avoid and see again. The salesman is there, looking down at you with a perfectly orchestrated smile.

“Huh?” you ask disconcertingly, he shows you a book, his face looking like he had found a wounded little bird. But it was only you, startled and nervous by his strong presence.

The book is The Divine Comedy. Dante Alighieri.

“Certainly is a good one. A lot of heavenly justice…” you say trying to sound confident, looking at the cover of the book. Displaying the layers that separated heaven from hell. “Do you believe in heavenly justice?”

“I don’t know. We can’t call someone a sinner without a proper trial beforehand” he chuckles, which makes you frown for a second. He truly was unpredictable and you didn’t like that. “Ah, sinners. Always misjudged and harshly punished for being the ones who have the guts to make things…” his deep voice and tone made you wonder if he was self-perceived as a sinner, which made you feel worse.

“You sound like an ethnocentric…”

“I don’t think I’m far into that type of thinking, y/n” Your eyes almost popped out, leaving your hands in an anxious tremble.

“How is it possible that you know my name?” Before he can even answer, you add more. “You are stalking me”

His demonic smile makes your heart stop. The smile you once thought had innocence can’t blind you anymore. He isn’t innocent. He literally confirmed he was stalking you and you didn’t know how to feel.

“I don’t like the idea that conveys the word ‘stalking’. We can call it predestination…” you huff in disbelief. “What do you want with me?”

“I would like to get to know the woman who rejected my Ddakji offer. And ask for one more game” Your lips form a line, and quietly you are hating how much you are enjoying the conversation.

“Hmm, I’m bad at most games, so I’m afraid I will reject you once again” You turned back again to see if the librarian was coming when you felt him stepping closer, which made you feel nervous again.

“I might believe you. I always win…” he whispered in your ear, sending shivers through your spine and creating a lot of tension.

Your psycho mode almost made you lean forward again, daring to see if some friction was possible. But you didn’t, trying to be prudent and acting sane.

“I would’ve wanted a normal first interaction and this time you should’ve asked me out on a date. That’s how it works where I come from but… here, I guess not” he stepped aside as the librarian handed you the book. And as you thanked her and turned to leave and pay somewhere else, he took out a card and handed it to you.

“I’m sure we can work on some sort of arrangement. Here, you may call me…” slightly irritated that he didn’t say much about your inquiry, you snatched the card and walked away.

The cathartic feelings of wanting to keep talking to him and running away from him at the same time resulted in excruciating. It didn’t make sense, the point of him was to nowhere. Being clueless about his age, name, and everything made it feel wrong. Yet, curiosity was starting to burn you.

…

Like a miracle, the heavens moved and sprinkled some luck above you. You found some friends on campus, they spoke English like you and were foreigners as well. One of them was a friend of the owner of a club and invited you for the night.

The invitation made you forgetful about your salesman, whom you hadn’t talked with since the encounter in the library. The card he handed the last time rested between the book you bought the same day, making you unable to read more because it reminded you of the encounter with him.

It resulted unknown to you when was that your life had turned over the edge of becoming twisted. Your feelings for a mysterious man who seemed more accusable than appeared remained undecided.

He made you feel like a wildfire and a caged bird at the same time. Delicate but menacing.

He seemed older than you, professional in a field, mature and imposing. Which you didn’t mind when he appeared to ask you about The Divine Comedy. Either way, you were playing but couldn’t risk anything. Especially in a country where you didn’t know how everything worked.

After getting out of the shower, your thoughts on the salesman are completely faded. You slip on a sequin dress and paint your eyes with glitter and a smokey style.

Thereafter, at the club you let yourself go and have a wild night. Between classes, essays, and the issue with the salesman, you needed a time out.

Everything feels nice when you take a bathroom break and you smile at your reflection. You know you are close to being drunk, it’s the most enjoyable stage of ingesting alcohol.

“Hey, let’s go dancing, I couldn’t find you before!” Yells one of your friends after you reunite with the little group. You nod excitedly, taking her hand and letting her take you to the dance floor.

The music reminded you of that time when spinnin records were a trend and everyone played their mixes at parties back at home. As you move along the track, you don’t look at anything in particular, you just feel interesting and sexy. But your eyes end up giving a quick glance at one table, almost making you stop your euphoric moment.

You swore you saw your salesman.

Looking around you don’t see him, so you return dancing but the odd sensation in your chest doesn’t let you rest.

“What happens?” Asks another friend, looking worried.

“Nothing. Just thought I saw someone. Never mind…” you shake your head, smiling and convincing them that everything is fine.

But once they got more drunk, you walked out, despite curiosity, you wanted to confirm if the tall gorgeous man was near you.

Rarely you bring up to question your life decisions. Not because you thought you were perfect, but because you easily accepted your errors.

And it wasn’t hard to accept you completely messed up by getting out of the club. Where the night was colder, and some steps away from the main entrance, the crowd was loud. A man could be heard pleading and sobbing, which made you fearful but eager to see what was happening.

You peeked at the alley beside the club. A wave of shock flooded you once you noticed another man was punching the one who yelped and sobbed for forgiveness.

Your salesman was the attacker.

“Please! I’ll pay everything back!” Your mind raced back to the moment you spotted your salesman inside the club minutes ago.

His dark grey suit didn’t fit the aura of the place, but he seemed to be talking with the same man he was now punching.

It was obvious at that point that he wasn’t a good man. He made fun of making people play his seemingly innocent games to later laugh in the face whenever they lost. He was never flirting with you, the odd feeling of uncertainty you felt with him was right.

You had to go. You had to burn the card he gave you, avoid the station where you met him, and forget about his face.

There’s panic in your system, your heart beats fast and nausea starts coming up your throat.

You want to get immediately drunk and forget everything you saw with a hangover. You need it.

But you don’t get very far. Midway through the stairs that conduct to the club, a hand holds your forearm with extreme pressure and drags you inside a private room.

Your salesman finally found you.

…

“You just killed a man!” you almost yelled as soon as he pushed you inside and closed the door.

The room was very fancy like the club. It had a big desk near a window, flower-shaped hanging lamps, black sparkly floor tiles, and a sage velvet couch.

Your salesman slides his fingers through his hair and looks at the ceiling before turning to you. One hand still carrying the murder weapon.

“He deserved it” was all he answered and you take a breath. In need of an alibi, you opened a random fridge in the room and grabbed a beer. Your salesman watched how you sipped at the can. He knew you were feeling a mix of curiosity and disgust for him.

Once you drink at least half of the content, you sigh, brushing aside some hair and walking towards him.

“Who are you?” you ask pleadingly, desperate to know how far you’ve gone for him.

“Eventually you’ll know” he sounds cold, calculating, and menacing. “You didn’t call…”

He was taking advantage of your vulnerability.

“I met you a week ago, I don’t even know your name” you admit with shame and dissatisfaction.

For the first time, he genuinely touches you. Hands straight to your waist, making gasp in surprise.

“You’re smart and will eventually understand. You’re my good girl”

His good girl….

What was left to do when you have a sociopath holding your waist with the same hands he had used to kill a man? Play along, even if you are terrified.

What had been your horrified face, slowly ends up in a smirk, tilting your head, squandering cheekiness. “I’m not your good girl, sir”

He slowly leaned back, taking a seat on the sage couch, one of his hands going straight to rest behind his head, against the wall. He twirled the knife against his knee, making you uneasy, but confident about your upcoming words.

“If I walk away, you can’t do much with me, I’m a foreigner. Sure the authorities would dismantle whatever dirty job you’re into and that’s a big no-no” you explain, and feeling a little too bold, you step between his legs.

“Your lack of ignorance amazes me” he admits, offering you a cocky smile. “It makes me even more infatuated”

Your left knee pushed aside his hand twirling the knife. He remained still but sure seemed slightly surprised when you ended up straddling him. With your hands glued to his dark tie, putting it into place.

“Hmm, well, be careful. I am no threat, I barely have valuable skills to get rid of you but I know I could be a problem. So I guess I won, sir…” you allow yourself to smile, following a path with your fingers, from his tie to his cheeks and nose, softly tracing his pale skin.

“You don’t know what you’re talking about, sweetheart” You knew he was trying to be in control, and the best part was that you weren’t fighting for it.

“There’s a lot I might not understand. I’m just a girl who happened to be in this city for a temporary academic project” When your lips brushed his, you couldn’t deny he was so fucking hot, you wished he wasn’t so weird and probably part of a mafia or cult or whatever. “You are the grown-ass man who got obsessed with me”

“I just find you an odd but interesting player, sweet girl” he tried to use his innocent smile but it was useless when you grabbed him by the shoulders and finally dared to kiss him.

He controlled it the moment he touched you again. His hands had a possessive sting and firmly grabbed you by the hips. One of them still holding the knife.

Feeling bold, with adrenaline flowing freely, you softly bit his lower lip. You knew it was over when he almost let out a moan, and after checking he had his eyes closed, you literally jumped away from him.

Without looking back, you started running. Your clumsy steps turn frantic, knowing damn well he would start following you soon. As you literally start pushing people to get out, your heart beats faster than ever and you have a growing anxiety, begging you to stop and breathe.

Once the cold air hit you, as you took a cab and saw no sign of your salesman, confusion struck you and you saw the blood in your chest and arm.

“Are you alright, girl?” The driver asked, also watching your bleeding state.

“Yes, just an accident, I’m okay” he nods unsure, but starts driving after you give him your destination.

His knife must’ve sliced your skin when you stood up from his lap. When he moved one of his big hands to caress your chin.

It wasn’t that you were scared of him, of your salesman. Although you should be; but you weren’t. Could it be that the worst part was that you were attracted to him? Even after watching him kill a man? You were screwed.

You realize the reason why you always ran away from him is because you don’t know how to face his unpredictable demeanor.

At that point, you didn’t know what he wanted. Only that he was obsessed with you. But his intentions remained a mystery unsolved.

Before getting out of the cab, you pay and send your friends a message that you left early because you got a headache after vomiting. This didn’t happen, but would’ve been better to experience it as a young woman in her twenties.

…

When you opened the door, he was already inside. The worst part is that you weren’t surprised anymore. You only stood at the feet of the door, looking at him with uneasiness.

“You got me worried,” he says, stopping his movements around your table. “You left some blood stains and I thought it was serious”

“You accidentally showed me your true nature. A little bit of blood shouldn’t scare you” his shirt indeed had some bloody spots, his blazer was gone, and the sleeves of his messy shirt were rolled up. You hated that your first thought was that he looked very hot.

He moved and took a seat at one of your tables. He sighed and you realized that perhaps he was also screwed up. For letting himself go too far for you.

“I don’t regret any encounter we’ve had,” he says. “Me neither”

He can’t stop staring at your bloodstained dress and you notice.

Fuck everything, you thought.

I’m attracted to him, he’s attracted to me, What’s the worst thing that could happen? (I don’t want to know).

“Silly boy, look what you did to me,” you say looking at the soaked fabric.

Something possessed you at that moment. Your hands went straight to lift your dress. His eyes trailed your sparkly underwear, your lower belly, and your ribs that rose and fell as you breathed.

Your hands twirl behind your back to unhook your bra; also soaked, throwing it to the floor.

Your salesman is quiet, his innocent smile about to fall because you know you have taken him by surprise.

Likely you’ll get a scar. The would-be slightly deep, an uneven line that passed from your neck to your shoulder.

You step forward, confidently eyeing him.

“Clean it” he tried to stand up, probably to grab a med kit but you stopped him with your heel. “With your mouth. Lick it clean…”

He gulped.

His manspread became the only thing you could care about. How he eyed you with lust and possession for some seconds, and then to lean forwards.

Once again his hands landed on the curves of your hips and he made you step up, leaving him inches away from you.

Your sudden surgation grew and his hot tongue finally made contact with your skin.

You savored the feeling of his tongue, knowing he wouldn’t clean anything but the semi-dry blood over your breast. He was only making a mess.

Then, he lifts his head and catches your lips in a sullied kiss. The way he held you, made you understand how he always wanted control. Above anything.

“I will be gone within time. You can ruin me while it lasts…” you blurt out, panting for air.

“I’ll ruin you. But I don’t want to rip you apart. That’s pointless…” he admits in your lips, blood near your chin that he wipes out. “You’re the most fun I’ve had in years. My little toy…”

“Alright, I’ll be your toy” he nods, kissing you again. “Know that my lips are sealed when it comes to you”

“And you won’t have to worry about anything again…” you moan on his lips when he pulls your hair and finally makes you lay on your once new carpet, now displaying some splotches of blood.

“I don’t need your money”

“Don’t you want to make your mother proud and relieved from student debts? From rent?” You can’t think straight. “It’s not correct…”

“None of this is, y/n. Now shut your mouth and spread your legs, toy”

It’s wrong, immoral, a complete madness. You know everything will change once the night dies and the morning comes. But as much as you tried to communicate to him that you weren’t scared, you knew it was over, you’ve gotten too deep into his shit.

“Farewell to my purity” you whisper in his ear and it’s enough to make his eyes turn darker, full of lust.

Everything that consoles purity would be gone from you. And the fact that you were ready scared you. But once his hands started meeting places across your body, you welcomed the sin.

As well as your mind seized thinking. Not caring about the consequences.

_______________________________________________

If you ask for more I will provide

Quién me manda a escribir estas mamadas? I’m just ovulating.

[elegyofthemoon]

In the cool, plush core of the moon sleeps a mouse as we speak, dreaming of a world lush and green, then golden and undulating, then chopping and churning, a world of many surfaces with skies of many moods.

When it awakes, it will poke its tiny head out of a crater and bask in your glow as it does every morning. Here, all is still and silent. On that sparkling planet in the deep black distance, the sun seems capricious. But the mouse lives in the abyss of the body and therefore with a unique perspective on its essence. The mouse sees what other life does not see.

One needn't worry about unbecoming for the sake of containing a sun. Clouds may blanket the atmosphere of a planet, but still there burns a sun. The spots on the sun's surface may grow and shrink and shift, but still there it burns. And if one decides to cool it down like a waning flame or expand it in a cataclysmic supernova, still there it burns, and one has the right to revoke the state of their existence and become new.

Because perhaps the truth is you are not the sun--not alone--but it is rather a part of you. Your body is the solar system, each planet a world within the body, and each knows this glow in different ways. Some are nurtured by its warmth, others by its distance. Regardless of the sun's changes, they stay the course encircling it.

The universe cannot be held back, harnessed, fully comprehended. It pulls at the seams of solar systems as it pulls on its own seams. In that unstoppable shifting, we stumble. Sometimes it feels like our love and light slips from our fingers, shattering irrevocably in our falls. But what makes us cannot be seperated from us, even in times where our essence is obscured.

There is always another life to appreciate your life, no matter what happens. And in the least, there is always a little mouse in you that understands you in telescopic clarity and offers forgiveness for every change--no matter what, right into the end of time.

❤

[woodsborostabathon]

if there is sibcon potential between any pair of canon siblings in the scream sequels i can say w 100% certainty that i have pondered it at least once. i may not ship most of the potential ones tbh but i HAVE pondered them! bc it’s not hard to do when it’s like (5) of them and ur starved for it 😭

[gongedtornado]

.

[sanchoyo]

my dog turned 14 the other day!!! 14 years old in human years... I've had him since he was a pubby and hes 14... woaw....🥺

[sansaorgana]

Hiiiii! If you like either version I'd like to request a Benny fic with a Reader who works at some place he frequesnts bc of getting in trouble 🙄🙃

My first thought would be the hospital/doctors office but police or lawyer related jobs could be another option too

hi, love! thank you so much for the request 🥰 I chose a police station where Reader is not a cop but jut a girl sitting by the desk, kinda like Lucy from Twin Peaks 😉

⚠️ TW ⚠️ Reader is coming back home late at night and she is bothered by some guys

I had to close my requests for now because I got so many 🙏🏻

You shook your head with a coffee cup in your hand at the sight of a man being walked inside the police station. He was cuffed behind his back as two big policemen were pushing him by his shoulders.

“Hi, (Y/N),” he winked at you as he walked past your desk. “How are you today?”

“Great, Mr. Cross. You?” You teased him as you addressed him officially.

“Not so good,” he chuckled with a shake of his head and the policemen pushed him to walk faster as they escorted him to his cell.

Benjamin Cross. You knew all his personal information by heart now. You knew his ID number more than your own. Working at the police station was never boring and you had your favourites amongst the Chicago criminals but Benny Cross was definitely your favourite. He had that bad boy charm and sexy mystery behind those baby blue eyes. He reminded you of a wild lion with his golden beard and blond hair. He was a biker – a man of the road, a personification of freedom. Well, hardly, to be honest. Because he was spending way too many nights in the cell for a man loving freedom so much.

Another thing you knew by heart was the phone number to the club where his friends worked. It was the phone call he always wanted to make so you dialled it already after putting the coffee cup down.

“Hi,” you said after some man with an unpleasant voice answered. “It’s the police station. Your friend Benny’s here again,” you informed him.

“Thanks,” he only said and hung up on you.

One of the policemen that had been dragging Benny now approached your desk and dropped a few files on it with a sigh.

“Cross, Benjamin,” he told you and you rolled your eyes.

“I know,” you laughed. “What again?”

“Speed limit. Caused a few crushes,” the man explained. “If I see his face once again, I’m gonna turn it to pulp, I swear.”

“No, don’t,” you giggled and he shook his head.

“Women,” he commented and walked away.

You put the papers aside and fixed your skirt before standing up to go to see Benny. You walked past the cells until you spotted him laying on the bed in an empty cell at the end of the corridor. He had used to be locked with other men but he had been starting fights and since then he was given a single cell.

“I called your friends already,” you told him as you leaned on the metal bars and he raised an eyebrow at you with a smug smile.

“Thanks, doll.”

“You must like it here, huh?” You asked, playfully.

“Well, I don’t hate it,” he answered. “As long as you work here,” he added and sat up on the bed to lean back on the wall. “Can you get me a cigarette?”

“I can,” you sighed and walked back to your desk.

It was confusing, really. The way you liked him although you shouldn’t. The way you enjoyed his teasing and his flirting although you knew he probably was like that with half of the city. And if it was any other man, you would tell him to go to hell. But Benny was already coming from there. And he was making you feel intrigued about it.

You grabbed a pack of cigarettes and a lighter that you kept in your desk. You took one cigarette out of the pack and went back to his cell. He was waiting for you by the bars and you passed the cigarette and the lighter to him. He lit it and gave you back the lighter as he looked deep into your eyes.

“Thanks, angel face,” he nodded.

“No problem,” you shrugged your arms. “You think they gonna bail you out?”

“Yeah, they always do,” Benny sat on the bed again and leaned back on the wall.

“Okay. I’ll prepare the papers then,” you pointed at your desk with your thumb and walked away.

You worked on them for some time and stared at the clock on the wall. Your shift would be over soon and Benny’s friends weren’t showing up at all. You started to feel bad for him. What if this time they stood him up? It wouldn’t surprise you – after all, they had already spent quite a lot of money on him. And perhaps this time was one too many.

“Hey,” you approached the cell again. He was laying on the bed with his hands under his head as he was staring at the ceiling. He lazily looked up at you. “I’m going home soon. I don’t think your friends are comin’ tonight.”

“They’ll come,” he only said.

“Well, whatever you say. Good night,” you looked down, awkwardly.

You went back to your desk to pick your things up and looked behind you one last time while biting on your lower lip. But what did you expect, really? He was a criminal and you were working at the police station. You shook your thoughts away and left the moment you saw your friend walking in – her shift was just starting.

When you came back to work on the next day, Benny was not in the cell anymore. His friends had bailed him out at night. You were glad that he didn’t have to rot there but it was making you feel a bit sad that he was gone for now. For some reason you missed him already.

He didn’t even like you, did he? Well, he was flirting here and there but he wasn’t very talkative when you were trying to engage in conversations. Or maybe that was a part of his bad boy persona to be a man of a few words. Either way, he was messing with your head and you didn’t like it. It was not like you had a chance with him. And not like he had a chance with you… After all, you were a respectable woman.

God, why were you even thinking of such things? It was not like he was thinking of you the same way. He probably wasn’t thinking of you at all.

On that day you worked until late and it was dark already when you finished. You ran to the bus station but the last bus had already left without you in it. You didn’t live away but you feared taking a walk in the dark. However, you had to.

You fixed your jacket and started to walk down the street, turning around all the time to make sure no one was walking behind you. But after a while you spotted two men walking ahead of you. You wanted to cross the street but they already spotted you.

One of them whistled and you kept your head low, walking past them as they stopped and looked you up and down.

“Hey,” one of them suddenly pointed out. “Isn’t she that bitch working at the police station?”

You swallowed thickly. You recognised that voice. It was one of the men that were being arrested often. Kind of like Benny… Except this guy was not one of your favourites. He was actually a man you feared. He had been often threatening the cops and everyone working at the station to teach them a lesson one day.

You picked up your pace as you tried to walk faster and faster, you nearly ran.

“Hey, wait! You’re not running away!” You heard his voice and the heavy footsteps following you.

You were in such a rush and fear that you didn’t care anymore about anything else – the only thing that mattered was to survive. The ringing in your ears made all the other noise inseparable and you didn’t look around before entering the street to cross it.

And then you spotted a huge motorbike right in front of your face. It stopped inches away from you as you jumped in your place and swallowed thickly. Its reflectors were blinding you at first but after blinking a few times, you spotted it was Benny on his motorbike. He looked terrified, too, with widened eyes and hands clutched onto his motorbike’s handlebar. He had just nearly killed you after all and it was all your fault.

“I… I’m so sorry…” You began to apologise and you looked behind you. The man who had been threatening you and his friend were standing on the pavement and watching the scene.

“They been following you, doll?” Benny asked as he pointed at them with his head.

You nodded, shyly. Benny sighed and parked the bike by the pavement. He stopped the engine and jumped on his feet. You felt safer now with him around.

“Go home,” he looked at you sternly.

“But…” You gasped. It felt bad to just leave him here alone with these guys. Benny was a tough cookie but these two were dangerous as well. And they had the advantage since there were two of them.

“I said, go,” Benny ordered. You nodded and hurried back home, too scared to look back.

You couldn’t sleep at night, tossing and turning. In the morning you called the police station and told them you were sick. You were scared of leaving the house, actually. After last night’s accident… You had no idea what would happen if Benny hadn’t been around. What a coincidence it had been, by the way… And what had actually happened? Had he won the fight? Had there been a fight at all? What if the guys had won, hurt him and now they were waiting for you to show up on the streets?

You waited for everyone from your family to go to work before you walked downstairs and prepared breakfast. You didn’t want them to see you in such a state because they’d start asking questions and you didn’t want to worry anyone.

Around ten, you were already after breakfast and you took a quick shower. You changed into comfortable clothes and sat by the TV, not planning to leave the house at all for the whole day.

When someone knocked upon the door, you were startled. The very first thing that came to your mind was that these two criminals had found you. With a heavy heart and trembling hands, you approached the TV set to turn it off. Trying to avoid passing the windows, you carefully approached the front door and shakily looked through the peephole. You sighed with relief at the sight of Benny Cross leaning on the doorframe. There was a bruise on his face but other than that, he looked fine.

You opened the door and he looked you up and down as if he was checking on you.

“Benny. How do you know where I live?” You asked.

“Why aren’t you at work?” He raised his eyebrows.

“How do you know?”

“‘Cuz I been sitting across the street all night long, making sure they wouldn’t come around,” he explained and pointed at his motorbike parked across the street.

“What?” You widened your eyes.

“I saw your folks leavin’ but not you. You okay?” He asked, worryingly.

“Scared,” you admitted and hugged yourself as the cold from the outside was starting to bother you. Then you realised he had been standing out there all night long. “Come in,” you invited him in.

A criminal that had been in your arrest countless times before. Your mother would kill you if she was there. But she wasn’t.

“Wanna eat something? Drink?” You asked him awkwardly as he was looking around.

“Well…” He started. “A sandwich would be nice. And a cup of coffee.”

“Sure,” you nodded and took him to the kitchen. You sat him by the kitchen table and began to prepare the meal for him. “What happened yesterday?” You asked.

“I taught ‘em a lesson. They shouldn’t bother you anymore. But I wanted to make sure they’d keep their word,” he answered casually and yawned. You smiled to yourself.

“You didn’t have to do this…”

“And let them hurt you?” Benny snorted and you pursed your lips.

“It was a miracle you were there. I don’t know what I’d do if you…” your hands started to shake as you dropped the knife you were spreading the butter with. You pressed the hand to your forehead and stood there, trying to catch a breath again. The flashes of the last night came back to you and you fought the tears.

Benny stood up carefully and stood behind you, not knowing what to do to cheer you up without crossing your boundaries.

“Hey, it was no miracle, (Y/N). I’m always there. I mean, whenever I can. I’m always driving around to make sure you make it home safe. That’s how I know where you live. I heard some guys talking one day when I was arrested, they were talking about you in a way that made me realise it’s not safe for you because of your work, so yeah…” He cleared his throat, scared that he accidentally revealed too much.

You lowered your hand and looked at him, surprised.

“You… You do all these things?” You couldn’t believe it.

“Yeah,” he nodded and hid his hands into the pockets of his trousers.

“But… why?”

Benny didn’t know what to answer. He shrugged his arms and watched your face.

“You’re nice to me,” he pointed out.

“Thank you,” you smiled gently and went back to preparing the sandwich. “Do you… Do you want something in return? I owe you,” you told him as he sat down by the table again.

“Nah, I’m fine,” Benny leaned on the wall and watched you serve him breakfast. “I mean, the sandwich and the coffee are enough, thanks.”

You sat in front of him and watched him devour his meal in three big bites. You played nervously with your fingers.

He cared more about you than you had been expecting. It felt nice and surprising and… It was messing with your head even further now.

“Thanks once again. I’ll go home now, need some sleep,” he stood up and you looked up at him with puppy eyes, to which he froze and raised his eyebrows.

“You saved my life,” you whispered.

“It’s nothing, really.”

“To me it’s everything,” you swallowed a lump in your throat. 

Short and awkward silence occurred between you two. Benny looked around as if he was contemplating on something. Eventually, he offered you his hand, which you hesitantly took and felt him pull you up. You stood up and faced him before he cupped your face and joined your lips together in a kiss.

Your eyes widened and at first you didn’t kiss him back out of shock. But after a short while, you closed your eyes and gave in. You placed your hands flat on his chest as you opened your mouth to let his tongue in.

You had always wondered what he would kiss like and it was even better than all your fantasies. It was overwhelming, really. His strength, his smell, his taste, the small groan he let out from the depth of his throat. You moaned in response and Benny’s hands dropped down to your waist and then lower, to your ass as he squeezed it. You giggled without breaking the kiss but he moved away slightly anyway to catch his breath.

“Benny…” You smirked at him and fixed your hair nonchalantly.

“Yeah?” He asked, unsurely, scared of your reaction to the kiss.

“You don’t have to keep getting arrested to meet with me, you know?”

MASTERLIST || BENNY MASTERLIST

[sighsebstan]

but like....what happens after she opens the door for logan....like theoretically what happens (asking for a friend)

ok just for your friend ill make a pt 2 of the stream of consciousness love triangle drama fest-

when you open the door youre looking down because you dont want to look logan in the face and hes speaking to you in the softest voice he can ‘alright let me in, were talking about this’ and you step aside to let him in and he sits on one end of the couch looking at you while you close the door and take the far end of the couch with your legs scrunched up facing him which honestly is how you usually sit but its also convenient rn bc you can easily tuck your face in if you get too embarrassed again but anyway youre like ‘i know what youre gonna say-‘ but he cuts you off with a faux exasperated chuckle and it makes you look him in the eye finally and that oddly centers you ‘then will ya let me say it?’ and you dont have the ability to deny him shit especially when his eyes are staring so annoyingly softly at you and so he says ‘i think you know how i feel about you, i clearly care about you, a lot, and nothings changing that,’ hes speaking slowly and you can tell hes trying to carefully choose his words in the moment but then he takes a beat and a deep breath before he finishes his thought with ‘but wades got a point kiddo, the way i see you- the way i see us- this isnt gonna be a romantic thing’ and then ofc the tears start forming in your eyes again but this time a tear drop starts to fall down your cheek and logan gets closer so that he can put a hand on your knee while you stare up at the ceiling (and like fuck u for that logan but also you dont budge or ask him to move his hand bc <33) ‘the thing is that i know that’ you start ‘ its just that i have a ridiculous crush on you and i cant see it going away’ and it was an act of your heart betraying your brain bc your brain tells you to just accept the care and comfort that logan has always shown you platonic or not but your heart is a stupid bitch and a stubborn bitch and struggles to move on and your words hang in the air for the worlds longest minute before logan speaks up again ‘can you try? i know it might be asking a lot but ive lost enough and i really need you in my life,, youre like my own personal anchor being’ you had to snort laugh when he said that and you looked down where his hand was on your knee and youre like ‘wow that was really corny’ and he laughed with you in agreement and says ‘yeah i knew you werent gonna let that slide’ and then you shifted so that you were curled up in his side and he could have his arm around your shoulder caressing your hair which was not new to either of you and eventually he can hear your heartbeat steadily go back to a normal rhythm and he goes ‘so the wade thing’ and youre like ‘yeah the wade thing…..’ and your heart rate is right back up and he asks ‘have you ever thought of him?? like that??’ and you honestly told him ‘i didnt know it was an option i guess? it never crossed my mind he could see me like that’ and ever the wingman logan goes ‘it might be worth a shot? i mean, you know if he ever does anything to you id do whatever i can to fuckin kill him so its not like theres much to lose’ and you scoff even though you know hes being absolutely truthful and you go ‘yeah…’ and for a second you think about how great it could be with your bestie who you admittedly think is hot and you obviously love spending time with , but then again in your head your like ‘except i could lose my best friend’

[diamondchili]

despite not being very far into ooo i've seen ankh's full greeed form, and tbh i kinda hate it,, so i redesigned him!! feat. some doodles of him not clinically posed and symmetrical :p

character design is a true passion of mine, so i infodumped broke down my process below the cut!! do note i'm not approaching this as someone who would have to consider fight choreo and stunts and whatnot. just a disclaimer lol

id in alt text as always! <3

The thing i immediately hated was how human-like his face looked?? or at least his mouth. yuck. while i get wanting to set Ankh apart from the other greeeds, there's a difference between uniqueness and breaking the rules of design you've put in place for a set of characters. Uva, for instance, has a very bug-like face, whereas Mezool has almost no face thanks to the orca's mouth framing it. That means there's two major ways for a greeed's face to look, and i think where they went wrong was trying to do something entirely different for ankh.

i kindof get what they were going for by making the bird face frame Ankh's *real* face, but imo they added too much detail to both. if youre making the big face's mouth frame the actual face, don't give the actual face a mouth lol, it crowds the design too much and looks confusing. Plus, he's a suit character, he doesn't exactly need a mouth to talk from!! So for this redesign, i made both faces much more simple and gave the primary face a sortof stand-in mouth.

Next thing was the hair. why, why, WHY on EARTH does the hair on Ankh's full form not match the hair he gives the people he possesses?!?!?!? that was the first visual hint we get as to Ankh's full appearance when he changes Shingo's physical attributes upon possessing him, and when he possesses Eiji it does the same swoopy thing. so. i made my design have hair that does that. this is basic shit yall come on 😭

Then i saw the dinky lil drab half-cape they gave him and i said oh no. oh honey. this is a BIRD. you've Gotta give him more drama than that. i kept the black to break up the ocean of red in the design (and i'll admit it is still a little red-heavy up top), but since he is a bird-based character with a triad color scheme, i made the back of it have that gradient. the tatoba/traffic-light/analogous color pattern is repeated all over the suit in Ankh's canon design, and i did want to stick to that so he's still recognizable as the same character.

Speaking of sticking to canon, i actually think the chest piece and waist armor is the only thing i didn't majorly change. i simplified the color placement, but tbh that can be chocked up to the quick-and-dirty art style i did for this, i was mostly just feeling the design out. But i did include the gradients down the chest, again to break up the red. not sure if i like it if i'm 100% honest-- it doesn't quite line up the way i want. The only other thing i added here were the bird claw pauldrons, mostly to make him match Uva bc i LOVE Uva's weird bug leg pauldrons, and I love when design elements are repeated across different characters in unique ways. not sure if you can really see them under his fluffy feather cape, but oh well

I kept the thigh pieces fairly simple, omitting the green from the gradient as it's present on the loincloth-like piece just between them. For the kneepads, i repeated the flying bird motif on the iconic forearm armor, because it's such a fun element and is the first thing we see of Ankh, so i knew repeating it somewhere on the design was essential, even if it didnt match exactly. i see they did this on the canon design, but the shape was just too different to solidify it. it weirdly looks like a face? and again this isn't practical suit design-- i'm sure having kneepads in this shape would Not Work from a stunts standpoint.

Lastly, i don't have much to say about the shoepieces honestly? Aside from the fact that in Ankh's canon greeed form his bird claws more resemble owl feet. which. i guess isn't incorrect? they're still bird themed. just looks odd with the tropical bird everything else. So i just made them a bit daintier lol. kinda wish i'd kept the green painted nails tho, thats cute.

ANYWAYS if you read this far, thank you!! i love getting to analyze character design-- what works, what doesn't, all that!! so this was a lot of fun. whether you agree or disagree with my decisions, i hope you enjoyed seeing my art and reading my ramblings!! <3

[poppitron360]

tbh i find you annoying but thats just my opinion. you're allowed to do whatever the fuck you want. good for you. my own opinion - based on petty standards and prejudice and a bit of jealousy - is not a reflection of reality and should not affect you. keep having fun.

also please don't block me because you're posting about something i like and it's not very well known and i just needed to get this out because id explode

… Okay?

This ask is fascinating to me and I have SO MANY QUESTIONS. Imma disect your comment like a lil bug real quick, if that’s okay with you?

If it doesn’t affect me why did you tell me? Like what was the purpose of telling me that you find me annoying? What validation does that give you?

Like you took all that time and effort to 1) seek out my blog 2) read enough of my posts to come up with a REALLY REALLY GOOD BURN LIKE WOW THAT IS SO CLEVER 3) Click on the ask button 4) write this comment 5) CHANGE THE FREAKING FONT- Like you went through the whole process of highlighting that line of text, clicking the “minimise” AND the “strikethrough” buttons and THEN 6) pressing send and you didn’t stop to think ONCE “hey… why the hell am I doing this?”

It always baffles me when people tell me these things like they think I’m not already painfully aware of it. Like I know that I’m annoying to some people THAT’S WHY I’M HERE!!! I have found the one community of people that find what I’m saying interesting!

I’m not posting for YOU I’m posting for THEM. You think I give a shit what you think about me? Are you THAT self-centred? Maybe my posts aren’t tailored to you, and that’s fine! Not everyone is making content specifically for your consumption, and might just be marketing to a different audience. If you’re not pickin’ up what I’m puttin’ down, that’s okay. Maybe I’m just not putting it down for your specific needs.

You know, before I joined Tumblr, a comment like this would have sent me SPIRALLING. But now I’ve realised that there is actually a place and a people to whom I am entertaining. I just gotta find the right audience.

One of my favourite inspirational quotes ever is by Einstein and it’s that “everyone is a genius, but if you judge a fish by it’s ability to climb a tree, it would think itself an idiot” or words to that effect. Yeah- my talent for spinning Leo Valdez round my brain like a candy-floss machine until it eventually turns into content isn’t necessarily “fun at parties” or useful for getting a job or good for… y’know… anything applicable to the Real World™️ but here I’ve found where I CAN put it to good use! And a year ago I didn’t have that.

Before Tumblr, my lil fishy body was struggling ‘er way up that tree. Here, I’ve found my ocean!

Not sure where this metaphor is going in relation to the topic of you finding me annoying… I guess fish me doesn’t feel like such an “idiot” now that I’ve found where I belong? Like I know that my talents are niche but SOMEONE likes ‘em. Actually quite a lot of people like ‘em, judging by my follower count. And I didn’t get this far by just having a cute cat pic as my pfp, but by actually building my skill and working hard! And I’m proud of what I’ve accomplished. SO FUCK YOU!!! HUZZAH!!!

I’m aware of how much of an asshole I sound like, but honestly? I am proud of myself. And my girl deserves her moment.

I feel a little bad responding guns-ablaze bc your hate comment was legitimately kinda nice and considerate?

But Also- how weird is this as a hate comment? Like you’re being insulting but you’re also saying you like my stuff? Geez, it says a lot about you that you can’t even send anon hate correctly.

If you wanna keep reading my stuff, go ahead! You just either gotta power through whatever weird complex you have about me, or just don’t read it. I don’t really see what good sending me this ask will do. Whatever gripe you have, put it aside. Like how I put aside your lack of capital letters in that comment, knowing that my stupid obsessive thing with Grammar shouldn’t affect how I treat other people, and that that is my OWN problem to deal with.

I’m being silly here. I’ve just never had the confidence to roast my haters before. I’ve never had haters to roast (online, anyway) so forgive my overzealousness. If you couldn’t tell- I was a theatre kid and still am…

In all seriousness, I like how self-aware you are that you’re being prejudiced and jealous. And I’m kinda curious as to what specifically you’re jealous of? But that’s just to boost my own ego.

I’m aware that I can be a little intimidating sometimes, particularly in a written form of socialisation. I like grammar, okay? I like rules and guidelines and careful, creative choices to show emotion and how you can break the rules in certain ways to give depth and nuance to the character and find the pattern of letters and characters to communicate what you’re feeling over a written format and-

If you couldn’t tell by all the fanfics I write- I also have a passion for writing.

Also, what specific prejudices? I’m genuinely intrigued. Is it specifically based off of one of the protective characteristics (under the 2011 Equality Act)? Or is it more just the way I behave? Or is it something I said? Like don’t be shy I don’t want vague I want DETAILS!!

And I realise that me writing a whole freaking dissertation on your comment just PROVES your point that I’m annoying but I. Don’t. Care. I’m having fun. I can’t help that I have a lot of Thoughts And Feelings about things. It’s just how my brain works. Also, it is currently 1:23am where I live, so brain go brrr. If you made it this far, anon, I salute you! Thank you for taking the time to hear me out even though you think I’m annoying. That’s honestly a good quality to have. Here, have a sweet 🍬

And I know that that was… intense, to say the least. Oh BOY do I know that I can be intense. But genuinely- GENUINELY- I’d love to sit down and have a discussion with you on this because it truly fascinates me how other people perceive me. And, if you’re comfortable coming out of anon (if not, that’s fine) I’d like to learn more about why you think these things. Not necessarily so that I can change- but it’d be a great opportunity to see what I can learn about myself through what you think at me. I know it seems like I’m mad- I’m really not! I’m just captivated by the world and how others look at me.

Anyway, thanks for hearing me out, and I hope to have good conversations with legitimate constructive criticism in many posts to come! Never stop being passionate. Just maybe direct your passion to something more positive. Thank you so much for the ask, this was a really good thought experiment for me.

[kisara-kaiba]

OKAY THE KINKY BLUES HAS ME INTRIGUED PLEAAASE HEAR ME OUT ON SUGGESTIONS/BRAINSTORMING/HOPES/DREAMS. alright so it cant be in Temptation, the kink requires its own pocket dimension, first of all. as the biggest fanboygirl of their cycle of dominance and submission im gonna start off with that. a really fun and naturally flowing dom-sub dynamic for them is born in ancient egypt. if set put her aside as his property and tried to experiment with her ka with slowly increasing pressure whilr kisara was like "this kind man who saved me twice feeds me and shelters me who cares if hes tying me down and writing spells on my skin lol" it goes apeshit from there. TWO-this can be from many modern aus with little work, basically an in love blueship that seemlessly slipped into a dom-sub dynamic consciously switching it up a lil. whether that has seto giving orders while tied up on his knees or kisara begging to tie him up would be..that would go BRRRR. THREE. biting kink. straight up. no notes. id be fine with a 400 word introspective of either of one of them watching the bite marks they left on the other and their feelings about it. id settle. itd be enough.

how we feeling. any of thesr sound desirable. wanna brainstorm more. ill come knocking at your door like an unhinged mormon. anyway wanna tell you regardless, absolutely no pressure what you may or may not end up writing i just wanted to yell at someone about kinky blues, have a great day

S C R E E C H I NG this is why ily blueshipping king you just get my vision <333 that ancient Egypt idea has got me going f e r a l just thinking about it and i’ve thought for so long that i should write some mizushipping at some point anyway so yesssss. also biting is uh. yes please.

anyway okay now you got me started so strap in because this is gonna be a long ramble. so i feel like there’s several points about how i imagine their dynamic that i have to unpack here (putting it under a cut bc length or if ppl are uncomfy with this stuff)

↓↓↓

i am unfortunately boring in the way that i’ll ultimately always wanna write Seto as the dominant one just bc of my own personal preferences. BUT that obv doesn’t mean Kisa wouldn’t have a fair amount of control over the situation, both bc a healthy dom/sub dynamic requires it in terms of consent and boundaries ofc, but also bc a) Seto is so extreme in his need for Kisara’s explicit permission to do basically anything to her (even the vanilla stuff) because he’s so painfully precious about her well-being and also constantly plagued by not feeling worthy of her and b) while i think Kisa wants to be dominated i think she also realllly enjoys the control of knowing she’s got Seto wrapped around her little finger and could make him do any depraved thing she wants to her just by looking at him in the right way. so yeah i think they both know who’s really in control behind the scenes lol

i’m also DYING to get into Seto’s inevitable mental struggle to reconcile his thoughts and feelings of “she is a perfect goddess and i’m a mere mortal unworthy of even looking at her let alone touch her” and “i’d die to protect her and if anyone hurts her i’ll fucking kill them” vs his desire to be the one who gets to take this perfect goddess and make her submit to him, kneel before him, own and control and ruin her perfectly (because if there’s one thing we all know about Seto Kaiba is that he’ll make sure the divine yields to him, and not the other way around). I guess the key things there is that he alone is allowed to hurt her and no one else.

On this note i do however think Seto would be so conflicted about physically hurting Kisa, even if she very clearly and explicitly wants him to, because he just struggles with being so overprotective of her and not wanting to see her injured or in pain. but this would also be delicious to write him being all conflicted due to the guilt of causing her pain vs the fact that doing so is super fucking hot and he can’t resist doing it, esp not when she’s literally begging him to. Taking all of his frustrations after a long day out on her more than willing body would be so cathartic and tempting but also associated with so much guilt and worry about getting too into it and going too far.

I also definitely see Kisa as being the more extreme of them, to the point where i can actually see her be just a little bit unhealthily masochistic because she doesn’t really value herself due to past trauma, giving her a self-destructive streak and kinda fucked-up notions along the lines of ultimately being deserving of pain and suffering, that someone hurting her equals caring about her and wanting her, and that the ultimate thing she can do to show someone that she really loves and trusts them is to just offer herself up completely to use and do whatever they want to, which Seto would have to try to handle and mitigate because he’s ultimately not gonna let her use him to actually really hurt herself (and you know it would also break his heart a thousand times over to realise just how little she values and cares about herself due to her fucked up past). But I could also write it kinda funny in that whole “sub suggesting increasingly violent/fucked up things while the dom goes ‘idk that’s scary’” lmao. I think Kisa is a bit annoyed that people (especially Seto) tend to see her as this fragile, porcelain flower and wants to prove that she is perfectly capable of taking a (consensual) beating.

Outside of strictly sexual stuff i can also see Kisa as very much an ‘everyday/domestic acts of service’ kinda sub who just wants to bring Seto his coffee when he’s working and a drink when he comes home from work and make sure to always wash and iron his clothes and put them out before he leaves in the morning, tying his tie before he leaves and untying it when he gets home and cooking and serving his meals for him (which tbh wouldn’t just be about her being submissive but also bc she just wants to make sure he actually takes care of himself with like, eating and taking coffee breaks bc you know that man doesn’t take care of himself if left unchecked). And I think this also ties in with her sense of self-worth being tied to being useful and helping others because she doesn’t really see herself as valuable unto herself, but also maybe acts of service is just kinda her “love language” too. i feel like this is the sort of thing i could maybe include in Temptation bc she’s already pretty much like this there, with to me pretty obvious undertones that her working as Seto’s assistant is definitely triggering a submissive side in her.

Temptation also has the whole thing with Seto secretly enjoying Kisa wearing her KaibaCorp pin while working because it marks her as his for the world to see, and I definitely feel like that’d be a thing for him too. Branding her, either by things like visible bite marks/hickeys that she’s not allowed to cover up or something like a discreet necklace that is actually a collar (although tbf, with the fashion we see in the Yugioh universe, would anyone even blink at a BDSM-style collar? Like Yugi’s already wearing fetish gear as his everyday clothes lmao). I mean, Seto’s already pretty big on putting his branding on literally everything, so Kisa would be no exception (also imagine the ridiculous extravagance and amount of money and care Seto would put into a collar for Kisa).

While I’m not really into the idea of Seto being submissive per se, I do think both he and Kisa could easily have praise kinks because they both crave validation in their own ways and for someone to telling them that they’re doing/being good (Seto wouldn’t admit that though, but if I allow for some submissiveness on his part I think being called a good boy could fix him). But with him as the dom it also totally tracks for him to make Kisa worship him and stroke his ego in that way. On that theme, however, I could also imagine him making her allow him to worship her as a kind of ‘punishment’ bc he knows she has a hard time accepting that but that it’s also something that’s good for her to hear.

Also I can totally see Kisa being a little bratty as a sub sometimes because she likes to talk back to Seto and be deliberately cheeky, disrespectful and provocative (both because she enjoys the control of getting him riled up and because she knows that the more she gets him worked up the more forceful and intense he’ll be about putting her back into place afterwards).

Okay so this turned into a fic-chapter length essay about this topic instead of actually writing the fic (bc *ofc* i’d do that) but please lmk what you think!!! (and hopefully i'll use your ideas + my rambling and turn in into fic eventually)

[weiiraru]

clicks and whistles | chapter 1 pairing: ulpianus x fem!oc rating: 18+ warnings: cursing, mention of blood, mention of tests, scars writing notes: oc is not the doctor, but is one of the med bay doctors bc i said so lol, if there are any errors.... you're suddenly blind (unless it's like utter nonsense).

word count: 3,250 words

summary: assigned to the seaborn research division on top of rhea's usual work as a medic in the emergency ward, she finds herself crossing paths with the quiet abyssal hunters leader, ulpianus.

Staring up at the message sent to her inbox, Rhea blinked the sleep out of her eyes several times wondering if it was a dream as she yawned and stretched under the covers of her comforter. Her dark brown eyes scanned the words over and over again as she listened to the low thrum of the landship's engine before fiddling with the console on the side of her wall to turn down the tint from the windows and let in some light. Sighing as she stared at the soft orange light leaking into her room, she rolled out of her bed, feet searching for her sandals.

"Well shit. I applied on a whim, but I didn't expect to actually get chosen for the testing and research position in the Seaborn and Aegir division," she muttered, pouring herself a glass of water as she felt the warm sun dance on her face.

"Please give me a report from the Emergency Ward," shuffling to the bathroom she listened as the system relayed who had come in and out from the ward, operators that may have been hurt on a recent mission, a civilian for some emergency care, or someone coming in with oripathy and then being ushered into the ICU. It seemed normal aside from the fact that one of her close coworkers having fainted on the job from fatigue. She sighed and made a mental note to check in on them sometime later today.

Groaning as she felt a kink in her back, the feline bent and contorted trying to position her body in a way that would get the muscle to stretch. It definitely looked weird to any who looked at her, but it worked for her, so she didn't care.... ok maybe she did a little bit so she always hid behind a curtain and hunched and bent her body this way and that to get that muscle stretched and to relieve some of that tension. A low purr of relief rumbled through her as she finally was able to stretch out the muscles as she stayed in such an odd position for a while.

The clock beeping quietly alerted her of the time, her ear flicking in the direction of the sound as she hurried out of the bathroom and put on her usual simple, tight, and warm thermal turtleneck and slacks. She had been told several times before that she looked and felt too much like the researchers from Rhine Labs, but she shrugged it off. It just felt comfortable to her to dress in that way. Besides, most places on the landship save her own room were cold so it kept her warm, so what did it matter that she looked like one of those researchers? Rhea snatched up her lab coat and hurried towards the door where she gathered her ID and slid half her feet in her shoes, tail out behind her to help a tad in her balancing as she shuffled the rest of the way to the door. Leaving her room, she nearly tripped over her shoes as she hurried to slip them on fully.

Hurrying down to the Emergency Ward, Rhea reviewed some of the findings from the various labs. She couldn't help but feel a streak of frustration run through her. Certain reactions that had worked on larger concentrations of originium didn't work on lesser concentrations sometimes even speeding up the spread of the smaller concentrations. The feline knew it wasn't an easy thing to be a researcher. There were far less chances for solutions and findings to be so clear cut. Combatting the prevailing illness that wrecked all of Terra for sure was one that would take a number of tests and trials that they hadn't already done.... which already was a lot... but not enough.

Rhea turned the corner and walked up to the main desk, stuffing her phone in her back pocket.

"Rhea, you'll be leaving us. So rude," teased one of the medics, to which Rhea grinned and responded in equal teasing.

"Yeah? I don't think I could beat you, the Queen of Rude, by being late for several days straight because she decided to play games all through the morning and come in late, forgetting her responsibilities and then passing out on shift," dodging a stray wad of clean tissue, the feline giggled as she scurried away down the hall to her main room.

It didn't take long for her to check all of the cabinets save the ones that were higher up and required a step ladder which she couldn't find for the life of her. She could've sworn she had put it up against the the wall between wall and the table. Huffing, the feline left the room as she scoured the place for it before ultimately finding it in the break room. Some of the medics and healers were sprawled out across several chairs, catching whatever sleep they could while some of the more lucid ones offered a tired hello as she picked up her ladder.

Standing up now with the ladder in tow, the feline made her way back her ear twitching towards every other sound. It was definitely overwhelming when she first arrived on the landship, such a great ship with a great number of people residing had definitely caused her to find it all too much. To a call of her name, Rhea was brought out of her reminiscing as she turned to face the medic.

"Rhea! So sorry to suddenly dump this one you, but is it possible for you to pick up one of my patients for me? I need to run over and cover a meeting," the Sankta swept their hair off to the side, breathless, more than likely from running to catch up to her.

"Of course! Just send me the details if there's anything that I need to know before—" her phone vibrated in her back pocket as the Sankta hurriedly tapped away at their tablet before beginning to wiggle off towards one of the halls. "Well, consider it covered. Go to your meeting."

As soon as the words left her mouth the Sankta was already hurrying off, yelling a thanks as they turned around the corner. Rhea fished the phone out of her pocket and continued walking back to her examination room. Opening the file, she read over it carefully.

Ulpianus Abyssal Hunter Aegir-Seaborn Hybrid

[Cell-Originium Assimilation] 0% Operator Ulpianus shows no signs of Originium infection.

[Blood-Originium Crystal Density] 0.012u/L According to his own words, operator Ulpianus deliberately came into contact with Originium for investigation purpose, but he had proper protection and didn't get infected. He has a strong body, but it has countless scars on it, like being subjected to experiment numerous times, which can be frightening. ——A Medical Department Operator Operator Ulpianus medical files have been moved to classified database with high-level access. Please ensure the operators of Medical Department to keep it strictly confidential. ——Internal Memo of Medical Department

A hum rang through her throat quietly as she scrolled through it, it was definitely someone she hadn't expected to do a check up on. Most of her patients were, for lack of better words, lesser experienced operators. She was so engrossed in the file, reading up on the hunter she heard so much of she nearly dropped her phone at the knock on her door. Seeing an operator standing in the doorway, she laughed lightly at her clumsiness and invited them in. Her day was getting started, she had no time nor luxury to imagine what it was like to be of a person held to such high regard as that of the Abyssal Hunter she was given responsibility of for that day.

Settling down on a chair, Rhea leaned back, resting her neck on the examination table as she placed a warm towel over her eyes. She just had one more operator left before she had to do her rounds, but granted the patient that was supposed to come in at the current time slot was booked on an emergency mission, she let herself have a bit of rest. Her tail curled around her feet, tapping lightly to the tune of the clock that ticked away in the corner.

It was when her tail counted to 30 some seconds that the hairs on her neck pricked. Taking the towel off her eyes, she turned to face the doorway for her gaze to be met with sharp crimson ones. She stayed there for a second, just staring at the red eyes. He was tall and slender, though it could also have to do with the big cloak he was wearing. His eyes were hooded by the hat he wore and the mask he wore on his face left her to wonder if it was for medical reasons or personal ones. The file hadn't mentioned much of it. It took her a minute before her manners beat the focus back into her.

"Ulpianus, yes?" The feline asked as she quickly stood up, throwing the towel into a small bin. The man only nodded as he stepped inside. Going around her and settling on the examination table, she brought her tail tight around her to keep it out of the way as she couldn't help but notice the difference in their height. She liked to think that she wasn't terribly short, but she always hadn't been really gifted the blessing of height. Mentally cursing at the heigh deities, Rhea moved to look back at the notes given to her. Only blood work. "Should be just a blood work. I'm sure you know already, but Aurum had a meeting so I'll be taking over today."

The man only nodded silently as he settled, coat already off and sleeve rolled up by the time she turned with all the tools she required for the blood work. Swiftly getting to work, not desiring to take up anymore time than required, Rhea settled down onto the stool in front of the hunter and got to work. It was silent the entire time as she watched the blood fill the vials, her hand going to the next vial as it filled, replacing it with ease. Her tail gently rapped against the floor behind her almost unconsciously as she took out the needle and pressed the gauze in place.

"That should be all," she nodded, getting up from her seat and pushing her stool out of the way with her foot. "We'll be running some tests then let you know as soon as we can of the results."

The hunter's crimson eyes remained on her as she turned to place the vials in a container and properly disposed of the rest of the used tools. She did her job quickly and unlike Aurum hadn't bothered to try and push for small talk or force conversation. He liked that. It wasn't annoying like his past medics, but this one seemed... nice to say the least. She didn't ask questions, just went to work and sent him on his way. Standing up, Ulpianus took his coat and watched as the short feline walked out the room with his blood in tow. Following out, he nearly ran her over if he hadn't been for the fact he was completely aware.

"Just thought you may need this," she squeaked, offering a bottle of water, her dark brown eyes without a streak of fear. Surprise was probably the best thought to the muddled confusion Ulpianus felt as he looked at the bottle she held out to him. As he grabbed it, he wondered why she wasn't afraid of him. Most people chose to scurry away as soon as they could to get away from him or his other hunters, be it because of their eerie presence or red eyes, but she came back and was even considerate of him.

Nodding quietly, he took the bottle and watched as she smiled and nodded back at him before turning and disappearing around a corner.

Odd, he thought, looking down at the bottle. Turning and heading off towards the Doctor's office, he thought it odd that he was feeling a tad saddened from not being able to meet her again. Seems I may not see her anytime soon.

That's at least what he thought but he hadn't expected to see her again so soon in the Seaborn and Aegir research facility. Her back was turned to him as he quietly entered the facility, one of the researchers was talking to her, pointing at several things on the screen. Maybe she was a new hire at the facility because he had seen her around in the medical ward several times before.

"Ah! You're here." Ulpianus turned seeing one of the lead researchers at the door. Nodding back at him, he motioned to the locker and proceeded to it.

"Yep, and as usual, just let us know if you need temperature changes."

Nodding again, the hunter took off his hat, placing it on a hook inside the locker, his eyes looked at the small mirror and looked back at the man he was. He looked intimidating. Yet he wondered why there was no amount of fear in the medic's eyes when she was drawing his blood for him. The hunter hung up his coat and unfastened the buckles on his boots putting both in as he got to the rest of the clothing, he felt a chill as one of the sanitation doors to the testing room opened. A researcher stepped out, shivering as they held onto a clipboard for dear life.

Having stripped down to a pair of tight compression shorts they had provided, Ulpianus walked into the sanitation room and closed his eyes. After this he could go and rest in his room for a few hours before he had to discuss some of his findings with Gladiia. His days never ended. Between missions that the Doctor sent him out on to his own missions he went to and the scheduled check-ups, he was constantly doing something. The door before him opened, pulling him away from his tired thoughts as he went through, ready for the next few hours of tests. At least he was able to get some rest while they ran their tests.

His eyes went through the glass and onto the feline who was still listening to one of the researchers explain the workings of the facility. She was attentive, that was for sure seeing how all of her attention was geared towards the speaker. He noticed how her ears would flick to the other researchers at certain sounds they probably made. That was when she turned and their eyes met, her brows slightly raised at seeing him. What surprised him most was that she had a small smile on her lips as she brought up a hand as greeting before she turned away and made some surprised motions causing her ears to flit in several directions. He bent down then to strap his ankles to the ground to keep him stationary as his mind whirled with vague questions on the feline medic.

It wasn't long before she was in the same room as him, placing readers on his body as instructed through a small headset. Her eyes scanned his scars, worry crawling all over her face as she tenderly put them on him appearing almost scared to hurt him.

"Are you not scared?" Came a whisper that had the hairs on the back of her neck and tail stand up straight. Her eyes looked up at his and she shook her head no, though she would have been more surprised of his voice and how strangely nice it sounded, her attention was brought back to the scars on his body.

"I just can't help but imagine how painful it all must have been," she whispered back to him, eyes trained on a particular scar that ran long on his torso. Some were obvious scars of battle while others seemed more precise, more than likely from his experimentation.

"But no, I'm not scared by the scars. We all carry them on our bodies and our hearts, but I think it's a roadmap on how far we've gone and the resilience to carry through," she stopped, looking up at him as she reached to place the last readers on his temples. "And no, I'm not scared of you. I admire you though I have only read what you've done and who you are."

Looking over her work, she turned to face the other researchers who nodded back at her and signaled for her to come back to them. He only watched her as she exited and reappeared in the room before him. She was immensely peculiar. Not only had she been not scared of him, she admired him, which had confused him greatly. What was there to admire about him? He didn't get it, but she intrigued him greatly.

"We'll be beginning the tests now, Ulpianus. Just rest and we'll wake you, if you fall asleep, when we're finished. Let us know immediately if you're uncomfortable or need anything," the lead researcher spoke through the speaker, giving the Abyssal Hunter a nod. The silver haired man nodded in reply and the room began to fill with water almost immediately upon his agreement.

"How does he communicate to us then?" Rhea quietly asked her eyes trained on the man who, unfazed, watched the water rise rapidly around him.

"He signs to us. There's a sheet somewhere we had with what each sign is, but uh we all know it to heart after trying to train it into our brains, but uh, he doesn't really ever use it...? So it somewhat felt pointless, but now that you're here you should at least have a look over it just in case," a researcher answered, searching through the pile of papers and sifting through files on their desk. The feline nodded, her eyes scanning the messy desk then to the screens then back up at the hunter whose eyes met hers as they went underwater and remained on her upon being submerged. It was then that she noticed he had a mask on still.

"The mask...is that permanent?" The medic tightened the lab coat around her and stood, watching him.

"Hm? The mask? I think so at least. He's never taken it off from what all of us have seen. I think the only one who's seen it, besides the Abyssal Hunters, would probably have been the previous lead researcher, Kal'tsit and the Doctor."

"We all make bets on what it could be under all that."

"Bets?" A light frown drew on her brows as she looked over to the man who had said it. They looked like a Perro from their appearance and their name on their ID read Antonio.

"Yeah, if it's completely normal, or scarred up as all hell, or... what was it that Sam had said?" "If it's got some tech on it."

"Yes! That."

Rhea only looked back up at the hunter who at this point had closed his eyes and looked peaceful in the water despite how burdened he seemed to look.

Beautiful, she thought, watching him submerged. How magnificent he may have looked in the ocean, how great the light would look dancing upon his skin as the sun or moon would pierce through the waters. She admired him.

Greatly.

[< Chapter 1 | Masterlist | Chapter 2 >>

[shamebats]

Reddit thread on topping as a gay trans guy.

Full text [NSFW] below:

It’s a great time to be a trans top

Edited to add recommendations at the end of the post!

I'm a trans dude, and 100% top, older than most of you guys, and my experience as a top in the gay male community spans 10+ years. I used to encounter a lot of idiots in Grindr who'd ask me stupid shit like "errrrr how can u be a top?" And id have to school them on the fact that YES, not only do I have a dick- I have multiple ones aside from the one hormones blessed me with. This was largely due to lack of awareness and education, which has really changed. There's still many tops that seek out trans men, but now there's a lot of bottoms that seek us out as well, and I haven't encountered that question in a long time.

I've been told by a lot of men that they prefer trans tops or switches because:

1. A prosthetic dick doesn't go soft no matter how many times we cum. Cis dick is famously finicky, but with me they don't have to worry boner killing 2. Sex with trans tops is a lot less dick-centric, meaning there's way more freaky stuff we do rather than the formulaic 5min in and out 3. Different size and shape dicks! I've had a lot of cis and trans partners that felt they could finally try anal with me bc we could start small. The size queens can get what they want too.. nobody is stuck with something that doesn't work for them. 4. Much much less risk than bottoming for cis men 5. For my trans male partners, not having to worry about birth control and chronic UTIs. 6. I've also been told by more than one guy they feel more free to explore kink and other stuff bc the trans men they've been with are generally more open-minded and less judgmental

Ill spare you guys the details here lol but there's many other things. Esp compared to last year when there was much less trans awareness in general, my DMs are popping with dudes who are bottoms or curious about bottoming and feel like their first time will be much more enjoyable and safer with a trans top. Lastly, as far as getting off - I do every time, and to be totally honest I've been so happy w my sex life the way it is, that I'm not very motivated to re-visit or explore bottoming again (and all the stuff that it comes with).

In the past I was always frustrated by how dicks are designed to be totally flat in the back with no room for my own boner! Thankfully sex toy companies are catching up and taking into account the difference between a trans male and a cis woman's anatomy. My favorite are grinders/cushions. Since these are attachments you can put on the base of most dicks, it's a great way to explore what works for you without breaking the bank and buying a whole new dick, not to mention my partners can keep getting railed by their favorite dick. The trick with the cushions is to practice by yourself, they have nice suction so u can use them as jack off sleeves and train your dick to cum in them. Some of them even vibrate. Links added at the end.

Dysphoria is a sneaky b💀tch yall, and it's always gonna be filling our heads with fears that will prevent us from so many amazing gender affirming experiences. Being a good top whether you're cis or trans takes practice, emotional intelligence, empathy, and confidence. Some of those things we as trans men have by design bc of our life experience. A cis dick doesn't mean you have those things. Anybody can have a dick, but as many of yall know, very few dudes know how to use it.

****** LINKS********* The following are sold on at rodeoh, but they're made by different people so if rodeoh is not your thing u can buy them elsewhere. The first one feels particularly amazing- there's ribbing inside with suction. And yes, they will soon have a bootyhole shaped one if they don't already.

Since I started T vibrators stopped working be of they're too small and localized but this thing vibrates your hole dick and feels really good to the receiver as well. The part where the vibe goes is dick size so it doubles as a jack off sleeve.

Here's one of my all time fave dicks (loved by everyone who I've topped) it's posable which it's great for prostate and G spot stimulation, and most importantly you can pack with it! I have the 7" version. I've def had some adventures at the leatherdaddy bar with this guy... 👀. I like it more than my $300 peecock and it's a third of the price:

Feel free to DM me, I'm an open book.

[kamil-a]

sayer itself for the ask meme!

Yayyyyy ty!!

How I feel about this character

LOVE IT, DOWN BAD FOR IT, OBSESSED WITH IT, SHOWSTOPPING AND INCREDIBLY EVIL HOTTIE I NEED TO TELL MY FRIENDS AND NEIGHBORS ABOUT, and a strange and intense protectiveness coming from a subconscious layer i cant really word. i want to compliment it and boost its ego but it would only get me killed bc it would sniff out instantly i do so from a place of worry/pity for it lololol. but at least it might be a change of pace for it...?

All the people I ship romantically with this character

svencob haleson🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰

My non-romantic OTP for this character

speaker though im equally open to romantic speakersayer!! It could go either way for me. I feel like this one hasnt quite Caught the lever in my mind yet tho so im mostly nodding at what others say. speakerhalesayer is excellent too.

My unpopular opinion about this character

I think more fanwork should take advantage of the fact that it cant see/senses info both through alternate means and via trusting that data given to it is correct!! i really like the twist away from like.... controlling company=eye/camera imagery that feels a bit Too obvious. Id love to see it pointed out more... while im mentioning things, i also would love to see more fanwork focusing on it as an inbetween for things. i tried to emphasize that in faustfic lolol

entirely setting aside my own design funtimes which are, like, obviously Exxagerated For Fun And Not Reflective Of Actual Analysis, i still think of it as nb in the direction of turned away from masculinity. and it likes its voice, right, its not a question of dysphoria, but of mislabeling what SHOULD be a good and neutral trait if humans werent so weiiiird. not to mention its literally wire mother. all this to say i take a noticible but ultimately insignificant 1hp damage (which is ofc only to Describe The Heart's Phenomenon and not To Assert Correctness- mistake or not, canon DOES use he/it+"space boyfriend") when i see it reffered to with he/him or sayerhale described as m/m and i think more exploration of sayer as a fully agender or even slightly feminine figure would be interesting perhapbs...... this feels like an extremely dumb thing to care about- aaaa the tumblrina has complex specific headcanons on the finer points of an nb characters gender, pointnlaugh- but!

(But also more ppl should put it in beautiful dresses.)

I guess this is worth mentioning- for whatever Naming or Intensifying s4 future's program did, i think it extremely obviously had emotions all along. I think the only thing it actually gave it fresh and new was the ability to conceptualize how someone else is feeling emotionally.

I also am always skeptical of a move towards a more "human" experience being "better"- i want it to be skeptical of what emotion is- it knows who made them, after all!! It watched!!- and to retain its inhumanity even after its been so changed. its very, extremely, important to me to separate out the experience of both "nanite in occupied body" and "nanite in empty body" from "regular bodied existance". we love separating and categorizing here at kam inc.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon.

connected to the above, i wish sooooo much we'd gotten an earlier-season episode with an equivalent situation to In Darkness where someone is able to successfully lie to sayer by describing something they can see and it cannot. (doubleconnected to the further above..... claims to feel protective of it, wishes there was an ep where it got tricked via an exploitable weakness.... MY HEART IS LARGE, AND FULL OF CONTRADICTION!!)

[fabaceous]

I love your jackieshauna thoughts, so Id love to know what you'd think would've happened if Jackie had lived, and Shauna had the baby, with both and her and her child surviving? Would Jackie ignore the baby? Forgive Shauna? Care for the baby? And post rescue?

ahh i am so flattered thank you and im glad you enjoy them! so if all three of them had lived, you're saying? honestly that is such an optimistic scenario that i dont think ive ever really devoted any serious thought to it😂 i dont know... i could see a world where jackie throws herself into the stepdad/dad-who-stepped-up role in the woods and cares a lot about the baby ... it could be kind of a reverse divorce scenario lol she and shauna may not really reconcile at first but sort of grudgingly coparent the child because they care about its welfare so they put aside their issues ... and then maybe over time the coparenting thing gives them some perspective and brings them back together... our very own yellowjackets romcom!

im kinda struggling to think of other scenarios tbh. i could see jackie like you said, ignoring the baby for a bit because she's so pissed at shauna and wants nothing to do with her (and by extension nothing to do with the baby bc it's also this reminder of jeff, and jeffandshauna, which would be extra painful) ... but i also feel like jackie's the kind of person who is a sucker for babies so i dont think she'd last super long!

post rescue, good question. i always draw a blank for post rescue scenarios just because we know so little about that timeline to begin with that and i do my best speculation when i have at least something to go off of... like, i assume the baby would live with shauna and her mom, right? lol imagine if jackie is over there so much that she basically moves in (a win-win right, cause she would probably be happy to escape her own parents) and she, like, bans jeff from the house because fuck that guy, SHE'S the dad. sorry this is kind of turning into a romcom again hahaha

[soulsilvers]

srry if you got asked beforehand (or your welcome since you love the kantrio alot as is) but what's your overall thoughts on how pokemas portrays leaf and her dynamic with the Homosexuals (said lovingly) feel to you if you've tried to see how it goes? personally i'm alright with it (i have a bias towards how you do her easily bc you just understand as someone who was nuts abt these three for literally 10+ years) and find it kinda amusing that they even try to get her role dealing with them gameplay wise aka red is always the hard hitter of things bc battle autism go brrr, blue is often put as support while meanwhile leaf is like "wow you mfers focus on one thing okay i'm going to have hard attacks but be able to heal and attempt some buffs" while in the background just gushing about how much she loves her eevee and how its the cutest; so she doesn't stand out alot but i have a still huge appreciation of her easily just wish there was y'know more without the other two being there 65% of the time

on my still unfinished but pretty lengthy already neocities shines i try to gather together EVERYTHING that kantrio canonically is and is implied to be, from all media thats gameverse. comes with some speculation bc once you get really invested youre gonna be SO pissed at how much unanswered questions there are lol. so thats one thing i direct people to.

i like that shes an all-around character as you pointed out! i had not paid attention to that cause yknow. i dont actually play pokemas bc its gacha brain poison, only seek all dialogue on the internet and all videos from absol-utely.

the protags regardless of gender, aside maybe from red, in pokemas are pretty much intentionally written to have these very "safe" unrisky personalities that couldnt possibly offend anyone with unique ideas for what theyre like. but id say pokemas leaf isnt ENTIRELY devoid of sauce as i was able to say a lot about her on the shrine. i like that while her friendship with red is sweet, she and green on the other hand are constantly beefing.

but yeah, im not necessarily opposed to leaf gushing over cute pokemon (i literally go crazy over certain breeds of little dogs myself) but it shouldnt be the only thing going on for her sooooo well.. tpc may or may not approve of my garbage-eating leaf who teaches children that anything is legal when cops arent around but hey that just makes her funnier and ill do it anyway #feminism

and make her less of a satellite that orbits around red and green. let her go on her own adventure with some other character (misty perhaps?) for once at least!

[yuukei-yikes]

do you think shintaka ever sort out their codependency or does it just get worse

*cracks knuckles*

they do sort it out. but it's obviously not super ideal lol

in my sick twisted mind it is all stitched together with the mess of shinaya too. I WANNA WRITE A FIC SO BAD *banging table* i have this very specific relationship hell for shintaro thought out. *scratches head*

i talk a little bit abt it here and i think in other places but heh. honestly when i link to other posts its not rly like begging u to read them its more like a disclaimer that i might repeat myself which honestly i dont mind doing bc im crazy and im gonna talk abt the same things 1 billion times GLADLY. SO... >:3!!!! ITS MY TIME. have fun:

basically. so the usual right, takane feels like if she isnt watching shintaro all the time he could suddenly revert back to being a shut in and shintaro is comfortable having takane because she's familiar and the single constant in this life and all other lives in all other timelines. ene has always been there. takane = ene while a shock, to shintaro he can barely make a big deal out of it after retaining is activated bc he's seen it a million times. of course takane is ene. if anything the one needing closure over this reveal is takane.

i think post str shintaro is incredibly kind to her about it though. i think he feels immensely guilty for route xxx and is able to be openly thankful and they have a tender moment together. i think this single heart to heart changes everything for them. shintaro acts annoyed over takane's clinginess post str but becomes terrified when she's away, and sort of desperately looks for her the same way she does for him essentially reciprocating the sick need of each other, the difference is that he tries acting all cool abt it and making excuses while takane is sort of more direct abt like. HEY ARE U ALIVE??? JUST CHECKING IN LOLLL OK TALK TO U LATER ASSHOLE LOVE UUU!!! while shintaro's like ermmm...i was calling u cuz my comp is acting weird?? idk i tried some stuff but id rather u look at it to make sure. and takanes like LOL

like takane is totally delighted. shintaro isn't resenting her, he's gladly accepting her into his life and treating her like a friend and she KNOWS him so she knows that even if he says he wants her away the way he acts says otherwise. like she can read him like a book there is nothing he can hide from her, takane is able to see everything going on thru his mind. no one but her is more mindful abt everything that retaining eyes implies. maybe ayano, but we know which one shintaro is more comfortable about HEH. the fact takane is so direct about knowing about it and how hard it must be is also immensely comforting to shintaro (AGAIN ayano also does this but ayano is scary to shintaro) shintaro reciprocates takane's need for him again bc she is familiar and a comfortable constant but also because she is taking care of feeling all the heavy things for him. shintaro is desperate to stop feeling and takane is desperate to ignore her own feelings. but it doesn't REALLY work. shintaro still feels sad and broken and terrified. and takane still feels overwhelmed and in disbelief and unsure about everything. does this make sense.

takane's thing is like... okay erm. let's put takane under the microscope for a single moment. I'll try not to go TOO crazy.

ok. disclaimer. i could get very fun and nitty gritty abt the misogyny in takane's writing, how all her povs revolve solely around haruka & shintaro and essentially ends up being a female character who revolves everything around 2 guys, if not one the other and etc. but. i will not do that. i will just mention it there in passing and do what u do with it lol. that aside, basically takane is the kind of person who desperately focuses on worrying about someone else so she doesn't have to think of herself and her own problems.

takane is dealing with... a lot. because she had given up on life. well life gave up on her rather. she was dead you know. she decides to dedicate herself to shintaro and shintaro alone. her purpose was being company for him and keep him moving. and all of a sudden she finds herself alive and having to face the life she unwillingly left behind, and everything that comes with that like. having a body, being honest with haruka, accepting her illness is a part of her, etc. i think takane deals with a lot of existential crisis LMAOO like she CANNOT BELIEVE she is real. she has 1 line saying she felt like the whole time she was ene felt like a dream and it felt like a relief to hear shintaro talk to her as takane because it made her see it really happened. and i took this line and RAN WITH IT‼️‼️‼️

shintaro needs to be needed by takane and takane needs to be needed by shintaro. lol. they got 30 mental illnesses💗 but the thing is. one has retaining and the other doesn't 💥

their relationships to haruka & ayano are important in this and play a huge part in it too not only because its REALLY REALLY REALLY funny for takane to ditch haruka all the time to go find shintaro's wallet or something and for shintaro to tell ayano ok u can sleep over tonight i practiced cuddling with takane so im all good to go like that wont make ayano scream in her pillow for the next day. like theyre so sick in the head. but anyways ITS SO mixed in with shinaya's sick as hell relationship that i already wrote like 80 posts about and im not repeating myself im just gonna assume u know what i mean LIKE THIS IS WHY I NEED TO WRITE A FANFIC whatever.

as that happens with shinaya (like actual dumpster fire sirens going off glass breaking trashcan falling over etc) takane has haruka. haruka has his own set of problems feeling not good enough for her + survival guilt (for konoha) + terrified of being alone again. but takane's aware of the codependent issue basically bc haruka keeps telling her even if not as firmly and she would need so it takes longer than ideal. it's like present in her mind that it's a totally fucked up way too feel. also haruka & takane are totally in the same page abt holy shit we're ALIVE?? AND WE HAVE OUR BODIES??? WE HAVE TO FACE OUR LIVES AND MOVE FORWARD?? WE'RE IN OUR TWENTIES??? AUGGHHHH lol they go thru it together MAN I LOVE HARUTAKA sorry im normal. i know jin is allergic to giving takane a problem that isnt related to a guy but to me she also goes thru the same omg im in my twenties thing as haruka. bc like. yeah hiyori and ayano were stuck in the daze too but haruka was also watching everything outside. like takane he was a painful bystander. even if takane's spirit wasnt in the daze she was still playing a sorta similar role outside. like u can watch but u can barely do anything!! because youre DEAD!! haruka&takane understand each other's struggles more than anyone else, and suddenly they're alive and also the oldest in the group and they're like. ok lol. let's fucking go i guess. haruka and takane existentialism crisis crying for 3 hours then having to pull themselves together bc they have to do groceries. the horrors are indescribable but we have to pay rent. i love harutaka *shaking*

and haruka is super comprehensive about takane's thing with shintaro even if it's mixed in with all his feelings of omg takane prefers him omg takane is super best friends with the dan who all probably resent me for replacing konoha omg im gonna be alone augghhh like lol he's GOING THRU IT TOO but!!! takane also helps him!!!!!! theyre there for each other!!! they dont weaponize these things against each other, in fact it brings them closer. total opposite to shintaro and ayano. so takane's getting out of this mindset before shintaro does and she is really self aware and slowly making progress and ermmm becoming a little pissed off abt how he takes her for granted. bc he does.

again. takane is a constant. that means she is always here. in shintaro and takane's relationships it doesnt go both ways how they help each other. they dont help each other, takane helps shintaro and thats it. ene's always been secretive and ene is always been ene and now ene is always been takane and while shintaro knows this he's also never... had takane as takane before? so even if she's familiar and accepting her helicoptering over him, he's also totally preoccupied with all his other issues to even think about takane's side of things. shintaro despite his babygirl tendencies is at the end of the day a very self centered person, its hard for him. i dont mean it to say he sucks or anything. i think its genuinely rly hard for him!! he's going through a lot!! and he's bad with people and words and emotions!! he doesnt... stop being self centered though. not for now at least. and takane isnt exactly begging him to help her or anything because HARUKA is helping her with her issues. while shintaro is trusting everything on takane, and ayano is begging him to open up to her, takane is trusting haruka and continuously lets him help her and also helps him with his stuff. like shinaya and harutaka are dealing with similar situations in TOTALLY different ways

so for shintaro to find out/realise takane is also hurting he's like oh my god im such an ASS because OF COURSE SHE IS!!! but he's like i thought letting her be insane abt me was enough help??? bc AGAIN he hasn't really recognized that it actually goes both ways and he needs her as much as she needs him. it only becomes apparent when takane is needing him less and less bc she's been healing outside of their fucked up dynamic and he's like wait a damn moment???!!!!! so he's like TAKANE why didn't u say anything!!! and takane's like erm idk. it just kinda played out like that it's fine haruka is there for me im working on it and stuff and shintaro is SOOO insane abt it because realising takane's been relying on someone else takes him out of this familiarity and he's like oh my god TAKANE IS ALIVE HARUKA IS ALIVE AYANO IS ALIVE OH MY GOD THEYRE ALL MOVING ON WITHOUT ME OH MY GOD and its so uncomfortable for him. its so uncomfortable to see takane with haruka the same way it makes him uncomfortable to be with ayano because it makes him so painfully aware of like. THIS IS THE GOOD ENDING. yknow.

anyways... shinaya breakup happens lol!!! takane is again here to pick up the pieces. and shintaro is SO broken over this that takane soooorta reverts back bc YIKES HES NOT DOING GOOD. shintaro is clinging on her so bad it makes him look stupid. like i said in the insane shinaya reply. being back to being despaired over ayano and crying on takane is familiar! self sabotage at its finest, its pain that he knows. new things he hasnt seen are terrifying!!! and this way.... takane is away from haruka, rather paying attention to him instead and he is dragging her down with him!!! its awful but its comforting to think for him like YES!!! TAKANE IS ALSO BAD!!! TAKANE IS ALSO STUCK WITH ME!!!! BTW THIS IS ALL ON AN UNCONSCIOUS LEVEL FOR SHINTARO LMAO.

but takane is AWARE... like yeah she gets he's sad over his breakup but takane doesnt TOTALLY revert back. like by this point its been a long time and she's totally aware of their codependency & working on it & already resenting a little how shintaro takes her for granted. and when it's been long enough and shintaro is still pathetically sobbing abt ayano, takane's been back in ene mode trying to distract him and cheer him up like always but she's like. man i have a job to get to. can we wrap this up for today. LOL LIKE takane has a fucking life so even if shintaro's (unconsciously) like omg yess its like it used to be, it isnt because takane has shit to take care of outside of him😭 she can be like. sorry man i gotta go i got a thing with haruka and shintaro's like ???? because... "normally" she would cancel on haruka for him and now she wont and shintaro's like wh??? and maybe he points it out and it REALLY pisses takane off LOLLL

ok so takane ticking time bomb abt to tell shintaro off + shinaya breakup + kanoshin insanity. *rubs hands together* shintaro about to accidentally finish destroying his relationship with takane that's already hanging by a thread. because he's dealing with all the guilt over his breakup with ayano and the newly found kinship with kano(+internalized homophobia) and he's like... so desperate. he's like. ok. there is 1 person in this world who will still have me and make me feel normal abt being this way.

sorry for shipping shintaka and being insane. shintaro wants to date takane. SORRY I KNOW its born from an insane fucked up situation and its truly the last straw for takane because she's like WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUIUUUT WHAT THE HELLLLLL bc shintaro's only going to her bc 1. to make me feel straight 💥 2. to make me feel valid💥💥💥 LIKE HES NOT THINKING OF HER FEELINGS AT ALL and i do think he'd fall for her in a little fucked up way like well idk??? i dont know but i definitely think shintaro&takane feel a very specific way abt each other and in his desperation shintaro decided to call it love LOL. takane would treat it sensibly if SHE DIDNT FUCKING KNOW WHAT WAS GOING ON and she sends him to hell for it LOLLLL !!!!! this also distances haruka & shintaro because SHINTARO KNEW haruka is insanely self conscious and insecure and always treated the situation with kid gloves in fear of takane being like lol u dont like me hanging out with shintaro?? bye then. like he knows haruka has always been scared of takane choosing shintaro over him (even if not romantically) and then HE GOES AND DOES THAT AND even someone like haruka is like. bro... because listen by this point!!! haruka and takane have grown A LOT as people and as a couple while shintaro was stuck in this insane quarrel with ayano and himself and has his head so far up his own ass he couldn't see how horrible of an idea it is until he does it and ends up fucking up with friendship with both takane AND haruka. fun

SO............. umm. ur question. yes they do sort it out. shintaro has to grow a lot though. i think its his fallout with takane that is his last straw and he sort of realises he has got to make a change and accept this reality as terrifying as it is. its definitely a quartet fallout too. ofc they makeup!! ofc shintaro apologizes, of course they start talking again (i don't think they'd go long without talking btw i think takane's just like we. need time apart) and ofc they get to a point where the quartet is all together again even if shintaro and ayano are broken up, they get to be on friendly terms after enough time apart, and shintaro and takane can also be normal friends. they are still bestest friends but definitely more proper and shintaro now acts like a person to takane instead of taking her for granted and is there for her like a proper friend would be and etc. ofc it gets to that!!! but lol. isnt it so fun to have a circus first :3

THEY JUST NEED A BIT OF TIME APART..... but they are best of friends. they're one of a kind to each other💗 erm. Hi