#life questions provided by

[haunteddragonssun]

Why am I the dumbass that thought contract law would be a good field to try and get into????

[serpentface]

Question about Couya! Since she is a bastard what are the reasons about her being brought into the main family by her father. Was it genuine care for his child or a way to save face politically/socially? Is her birth mother alive? Do you think she would have had a better life growing up anywhere else?

This is in large part due to how cultural perceptions and legal punishment of adultery varies between male and female citizens, looped into the very strictly patrilineal kinship system.

By legal definition, the word for 'adultery' applies only to situations where a man has an affair with a married woman, or a married woman has an affair with any man. Other forms of affairs (eg a married man having an affair with an unmarried woman) are wrapped into a broader set of sexual misdemeanors and aren't often charged or punished in practice, and the punishments are comparatively minor (if an unwed woman's father pursues charges, the man in the affair is likely to just pay a fine). On a social level, extramaritial affairs in general are certainly not Approved of and seen as lowly and dishonorable, but the average response is significantly less harsh/more willing to entertain Nuance with men than with women.

In this society there's differentiated shades of bastardry depending on the contexts of the child's birth, as well as a distinction for 'nameless bastards' (has not been claimed by their biological father or maternal grandfather, or claimed in adoption).

a) A child born to an unmarried woman via an unmarried man: non-issue for father, potentially serious social harm for the woman (especially if she has never been married and expected virginal, much less severe as a widow or divorcee). The child will not be notably disadvantaged in of themselves (their status will depend more on whether they are claimed and thus provided the social security of a family patriarch), the father will experience no hard disadvantages in claiming them.

b) A child born to an unmarried woman via a married man: mild sexual misdemeanor for the father carrying levels of social shame, even more serious social harm for the woman (often framed as not just loose but a manipulative Seductress of a married man). The child might experience minor to moderate social disadvantages, the consequences of the father claiming them are purely social and will not typically be severe. (Couya is this)

c) A child born to a married woman via an unmarried or married man: both man and woman have committed a crime and can be severely punished. The biological father can technically claim the child but will be disincentivized from doing so. This is the form of bastardry most comparable to the conventional definition, in that it is heavily stigmatized and has effects on concerns of kinship and inheritance.

In addendum to this, if the adulterous wife's legal husband claims the child, this may be punishable if determined to be active concealment of adultery (which is also a crime), and has EXTREME social consequences either way. (Either you're a cuckold too stupid to notice that your wife has been skipping out on you, or you're a MEGAcuckold adultery-accessory willingly rearing another man's child after being horribly shamed by him).

(This is separate from adoption- a man who marries a woman with an unclaimed child after the fact (whether it was a product of adultery or just a general out of wedlock birth) and claims the child is an adoptive father, he is not concealing adultery or being cuckolded.)

A child born in an affair can be considered an heir to their biological fathers (descent and kinship is fully patrilineal and on a Basic level it doesn't matter who the mother is), and can very smoothly and legally be claimed when the affair was not considered criminal adultery. The concern on that front is social perception rather than material legal consequences or kinship issues.

Couya's birth mother was an unwed servant working as a housekeeper for her father Saizen, so the Crime of adultery did not take place. It would be considered a minor sexual misdemeanor, and the woman's father was not about to pursue charges against a nobleman who could Ruin him (and had also formally expressed that he would claim the child, which meant he would not be saddled with a nameless bastard granddaughter). So the concerns here were entirely social.

The affair might have started beforehand but the pregnancy that produced Couya occurred after his wife's third viable pregnancy ended in the premature birth of a underdeveloped boy deemed necessary to euthanize (and tbr would Not have survived either way). This was after Livya Haidamane had a couple early term miscarriages, two viable but very difficult pregnancies wherein one child was very weak and sickly for the first several years of life, and struggled to conceive every time. A lot of people are going to be at least a little sympathetic to a married man having an affair and claiming a bastard in this context. It's definitely ideal and practical to have more than two children, and his wife (while not outright infertile) clearly could not reliably bear healthy children. (The average response is going to be "Well he shouldn't have done it but like, I get it")

Couya being claimed by her father was a mix of genuine care and saving face. Initially it was MUCH more the latter than the former. Saizen made attempts to hide the servant's pregnancy and to keep his own wife out of sight during the late term (to prevent the baby appearing after his wife had been seen Extremely not pregnant). But there's some levels of care involved, he could very easily have fired the pregnant servant and had nothing to do with his bastard and she would have no recompense whatsoever. The choice to keep and claim the baby and ensure its entrance into the world bore as little social scrutiny as possible is an act of care for his own progeny.

This was Not an act of care for Couya's birth mother (beyond the fact that concealing her pregnancy would benefit her in hiding that she is not only Not a virgin prior to marriage but had a child). She probably would have been about 17-19 at the time and was fired a few months after giving birth, and most likely never saw Couya again after this point (if she did, it would most likely be in the context of seeing her as an adult Odonii in public and noting her to look Scarily familiar). She has an Okayish chance at still being alive, she'd be around 50 (and a person who survives the high infant mortality and birth casualty rates stands a good chance of hitting their 60s), though she could very well be a casualty of the drought+famine.

Whether or not Couya's life would have been better is kind of a mixed bag. She had an awful fucking childhood in large part because her adoptive mother Livya Haidamane hated her. (Livya was ultimately a pretty horrible person but not just like. An Evil Bitch. She had A Lot going on and Couya was a living breathing insult to her and reminder of like, every one of her dashed hopes and dreams). Couya is also autistic and presented very intense symptoms as a child in a society that is Not equipped for a mass-understanding and support of cognitive differences. But she still did have an immensely privileged life with profound physical/economic levels of security inaccessible to the vast majority of people in this region, including her birth mother. Saizen also actually Liked her and cared about her, he just wasn't a routine physical presence in any of his children's lives.

Had she been left with her biological mother, she would be in a very disadvantaged situation as a nameless bastard to an unwed mother. Her biological grandfather may or may not have been willing to claim her, and her mother would have great difficulties in finding a husband (which is ultimately necessary for the security of women in this society). I think her mother was a relatively kind person but not like, a perfect angel. She would probably have complicated feelings about her bastard daughter, especially one whose very existence materially disadvantages her and was very, very difficult as a child. So this probably would not have been a good situation for Couya either.

If you broaden the question to ANY other family completely divorced from the circumstances of her birth, yeah it definitely could have been better. But in her case it's like either "Life of grotesque socioeconomic privilege but in an abusive household" or "Life of profound socioeconomic disadvantages in a household that Probably wouldn't have been this abusive but certainly wouldn't be healthy". There wasn't really a good option for her.

[sneakyboymerlin]

My hot take is that if Merlin didn’t love Arthur, the Disir episode would have still gone exactly the same.

[wylldebee]

Castlevania AU where Taka and Sumi were better written and respected and didn't fucking betray Alucard, and they and Alucard and Greta and Trevor and Sypha become this big poly relationship who protect their home and fight monsters together.

[helloiamacashier]

It's a travesty that I can't reblog gifsets of books.

[gothmods]

But also if someone really is going to decide to do absolutely nothing with their life despite being thrown a rope on multiple ocassions i would still rather they do that nothing in a clean and safe home. If someone is going to neglect their own physical and emotional wellbeing i would still rather they recieve the same standard of care as someone who doesnt.

Because i dont know if we can ~save~ everyone so to speak. As in i dont know if we can fix all those wrongs in a persons life that have lead to that point. Preventing them from happening to begin with feels less daunting than confronting the baggage thats mounted up over years. A chunk of that is at the end of the day down to them.

But i still want everyone to have a level of dignity in life yknow?

[seoafin]

i sincerely hope chatgpt is not going to be the death of critical thinking

[wolfwarrior142]

hii um this may sound totally weird but i was just wondering, and you totally dont have to answer if you're not comfortable, but was it really hard to do the schooling to become a nurse? did you have to do any residency the way doctors do? did you have to do a lot of hard chemistry classes in school?

im just a college student who's trying to switch majors and i just needed some advice and i keep seeing that you're a licensed nurse and you can totally shut me up now.

again dont answer if you're not comfortable, no worries!

Hello! Oh it's totally fine to ask! Nothing wrong with it at all. I'm no expert on this and may not give the most helpful or concise answer, but I will try my best. And you're more than welcome to also message me to ask more about it, I'm happy to say what I know (and imma post this so other people who may be curious can read it too).

I'll be totally honest. Nursing school is worth kt for those who are interested in the field, but it is also extremely taxing to most people. Depending on your school, you will take 1-2 years of prerequisits, then 2-4 years depending on if the school has an associates or bachelor program. If the school has only an associates program, you will most likely need to complete 2 years beyond that school to earn your bachelor's. Most hospitals prefer or even require RNs to have a bachelor's degree, so unless you work at facility that's desperate for staff or don't want as broad of job options, you'll need the bachelor's. So that's 4 years in actual nursing school, plus 1-2 years of prerequisits if you don't already have some done.

For what prereqs you'll need, that depends on your school. Chemistry was by far one of the hardest prereqs I took, and statistics suuuucks. I'm usually decent with math, but stats has SO much word problems that it's just as much deciphering written problems as it is math. Its very confusing, and the teacher I took it with was new so she didn't have the best grasp on explaining stuff yet. Definitely recommend finding someone to work with in that class cuz you may need the extra brainpower to figure shit out.

Anatomy and Physiology really depends on where you go. Some places have great teachers for it, some have decent ones, some have teachers that make you wonder if the teacher only got their degree so they could torture and shit on students (I had the latter. Our teacher's average class grade was a C. When she started, most people failed the class. And she was proud that her students had such low grades. She made it seem like it was out fault, despite the fact that basically everyone had shit grades in her class. I'm pretty sure I somehow passed with a low B and I hated that class).

That's only some of the prereqs, there are many more and they depend on the school. Thankfully a lot of schools are good about transferring credits between institutions, so if you took the class at a different places the credit should still be mostly good.

Now for the actual program. Do objective research on what nursing school is actually like, preferably from people who have actually done it. Look at multiple sources. Ask students at the place you'd take it at if possible. Get an idea of what it's like. Then think on it for a while and decide if you're willing to deal with that.

Nursing school is tough. It kicks your ass. It changes you as a person, both by making you more nurse-oriented and just as a person in general. It is very worth it, but it is also very intense and taxing for most people. If you are truly hesitant on if you want to pursue it, don't. At least not for right now. I'm serious. Nursing school takes a ton of work, and if your heart isn't in it you may have an extremely hard time passing. Or may not pass at all. And if you are any kind of neurodivergent, you'll likely have an even harder time. Trust me, I know.

Most nursing teachers are nice or at least chill. Some are mean. Some are absolute assholes. Doesn't mean they won't be beneficial, but they may make things harder for you. If they offer to help, then take em up on that offer when needed. There's a lot of things that take a lot of practice and studying to understand, and if theyre willing to help explain shit, that can make it easier. Besides, we were taught early on that being curious and asking questions and vital for nursing. You'll ALWAYS be learning new things, no matter how long you've been a nurse. And while you're in school, teachers who are willing to help you when needed are lifesavers. But be prepared that most of em will not help a ton as they do not want to hold your hand.

Find friends to study/work on stuff with. Figure out your learning style (hearing, reading, writing, hands on, a combo, etc). Develop a studying technique, and be prepared that you may need to alter it. Be prepared to spend most of your days engrossed in reading stuff for classes, as otherwise you're not gonna learn enough and you'll struggle. However, youtube videos from credible sources can really help.

The tests are brutal. They're different than most tests. There's literally a whole textbook made to help you figure out how to properly understand and answer NCLEX questions for a reason. There's a whole damn process on how to answer NCLEX questions. There have been many times where while answering questions at work for training (questions that are given to Medical Assistants (MA) as well as nurses), my MA coworkers will be confused by the question and why there's multiple right answers. And I just laugh and say "Oh I can immediately tell from the style of this question that it was written by an RN in NCLEX style. I'm so sorry." Questions on nursing tests are a whole other breed of questions, and that's because they help your brain think through things in a way that is beneficial when dealing with real pts. Which is useful, but also a pain in the ass.

You will HAVE to get used to understanding the process of stuff rather than just memorizing a single answer. Rarely are questions just about remembering a simple answer. They're mostly about understanding a process of how something works, and using that knowledge in the context of the question to answer it. If that makes sense. Like I said, nursing school rewires your brain. And when it actually works and you realize you're able to think about stuff and process it in that way, it is SO rewarding.

There's a lot. Nursing school is intense. Like I said, if you're truly hesitant and have strong doubts, don't commit to it for now. You have to be truly determined to give nursing school your best shot to start it, because if you're hesitant then you're mentally not gonna be as prepared as you should be to complete it. You still can, but it'll be difficult as shit and there's a solid chance you may not be able to.

I HIGHLY recommend getting a job in healthcare first if you don't have much experience with as a healthcare professional and are hesitant on if you want to do it or not. You can earn your CNA license, or go a step above and earn your MA license. Then work in a setting where you get to utilize that license. Then if you do decide to advance to get a nursing degree, you'll have a major leg up as you'll have medical knowledge and experience that will be very beneficial. Besides, many programs require students to earn a CNA license first, so you'll probably have to anyway.

There is nothing at all wrong with waiting a few years to get into nursing school. Tbh, a lot of my classmates were in their mid to late 20s or older and they seemed to have an easier time than us younger people did. They had their head on their shoulders better. They had an easier time focusing in school it seemed. Plenty of my classmates were also my age or younger and also did very well, but it really seems that being a bit older helps for a lot of people in nursing school. And the more prior medical experience they had, the easier it was for them.

I will fully admit that I didn't complete Registered Nursing school. There were multiple things that made me withdraw when I did. But I completed enough to obtain my Licensed Practical Nurse license (in my RN program, it's the first full year and first quarter of second year, as what is taught there is essentially equivalent to what an LPN class it). So I didn't finish yet, but I'm still making use of what I did learn. And after a few years, I plan to complete an LPN to RN bridge course. Currently I'm working as an LPN in a clinic to help build my knowledge in prep of that, and because my LPN license is still extremely useful and shows that I did at least something. Doesn't stop the absolutely raging imposter syndrome, but at least I am still a nurse and have something to show for what I did complete of nursing school (I withdraw close to the end of 2nd quarter of 2nd year, so after almost 5 quarters in. Just 1 quarter shy of a full RN license, which sucks, but I was struggling SO bad).

Do research. A lot of it. Look into what nursing school is like and what is required at the school you want to go to for it/at the school you're currently at. Nursing school is not for the faint of heart and it is not an easy degree. Some schools are a TON easier, but those schools tend to also not teach their students as well and produce people who have a harder time passing the NCLEX as a result. My program was very tough to get into, with hundreds of students applying each year and only 150 being chosen. And they grilled us HARD. But the harder programs tend to also produce more knowledgeable nurses. Hell, I passed my PN-NCLEX first try after only having to complete half the test before the computer program determined I didn't need to do anymore because of the score I already had (there's an algorithm that runs during the test that gives you harder or easier questions depending on if you get them right or wrong, respectively, and eventually it ends the test early if it determines that you've answered enough that you'd either pass/fail the rest of the test if you were to finish it. If that makes sense. It's super cool). And I hardly studied before the test because I was a nervous wreck (thankfully you can take it multiple times with not penalty except cost, which is SO comforting). And I like to think that the way my program taught us helped me have an easier time passing. Compared to some other people I know, who completed their whole nursing program from other schools and had to take the RN-NCLEX multiple times before they could pass it. The programs that are easier to get into are also easier to complete, which is SO nice, but they'll also probably leave you less prepared for the standardized state NCLEX test and nursing in general.

Still absolutely nothing wrong with completing an easier program, tho. You can only learn so much in nursing school and you leave it with only a basic knowledge of nursing in general. They cram a LOT into your brain and make you drink it from a fire hose, but there's SO much about nursing that is learned after you graduate. And you'll always be learning. ALWAYS. So the program you choose is only a starting point. Just your choice which one you go for.

I'm sorry, that's a lot. Nursing is a LOT. There's a reason why one of the phrases I adopted and used a TON in nursing school was, "It'll be worth it in the end, but god at what cost." (Also started and still frequently use "It's better to be safe than sorry.") It was tough, and I'm not super looking forward to when I complete my RN degree. But for those who are determined enough, it is so, so worth it. Its impossible to know what it'll be like until you're there, but just know it takes a lot of determination and accepting that it'll kick your ass. Your life will be Nursing School Only while in the program. You will leave a changed person. But if you're willing to do it, especially after doing some of your own research into it, I highly recommend it. It kicked my ass but I don't regret it for a second, and I definitely want to complete my RN at some point.

I'm driven to help people and have always wanted to do something in a medical field (animal or human), and nursing is one of the main ways I saw myself doing that. And even with my LPN license, I'm still in a position to help people. I have helped some people and always strive to do so when possible. I have no regrets. And despite how hard it is, I highly recommend at least considering it if it speaks to you as well. It is not a light, easy decision, but it's a worth-while one if you choose it and set your mind to it.

[leeemon22]

yall i have a job interview tomorrow!!! to work using my degree!!! that i studied for!!!

[soupacool]

congrats on taking T and experiencing voice changes, that's so exciting!! 🥳🥳✨✨

thank you!!! it's been a period of intense learning of myself and my place in the world and I wouldn't trade it for anything

[fionnaskyborn]

so uh

[anumberofcatschilling]

paragon that dabbles in dark magic x their dumbass friend

[fantasmadelaciudad]

reading an unauthorised fan treatise and am on ch8. but i think it’s so funny that both gottie and rob started out as fans with 0 followers, and then almost overnight became HUGE names in their respective fandoms. that’s so funny to me. me when narrative foils 👍👍👍👍👍👍

[the-obnoxious-sibling]

i love how flexible the concept of a roleswap can be. if i swap reigen and serizawa, am i changing which one is psychic? which one is a liar? which one is mob's mentor? which one went viral on twitter? which one used to be a shut-in? a terrorist? a water cooler salesman?

what roles do they occupy that i want to study like a bug under my magnifying glass?

but also: what is "role" and what is "character"? if i swap all of these things, what if anything is left of the original characters that makes the swap interesting? is it just aesthetics left at that point (i.e. only visually distinct) or is there still something different about the story you'd tell with them?

what is it that makes reigen essentially reigen, that you couldn't replace without making him unrecognizable? is it the same type of quality that makes serizawa essentially serizawa?

[wallapology]

Me typing Thoschei into YouTube’s search bar bc I need that fuckin dopamine

[unproduciblesmackdown]

also to go "wow this is just like in pentiment" about absolutely anything and/or "wow this is just like iphigenia crash land falls on the neon shell that was once her heart (a rave fable)" about absolutely anything further:

the Narratives within crash land falls where like, in the end iphigenia being Given the story of both "this is going to happen anyways" and "so why don't you see it as a noble sacrifice to accept." the situation happening to Create a story that she was killed, so her father must be tragic, and sympathetic. that iphigenia does take on that Narrative of taking on the Noble Willing Sacrifice, and it kills her, but she also would have been killed anyways, as everyone also knows. that we even get a bit of pentimentesque [other characters observe & assess things] like, the fresa girls as a chorus, and one at the end like yeah She Was No Saint, i saw everything, but being cut off by The News that's like yeah looks like iphigenia was killed, that seguing into her father saying yeah she was killed, god's will was done, She's A Saint now. seguing to the emcee who introduced the play, but that superceded by achilles, and that superceded with iphigenia's extasis monologue as the end of the play. that whether iphigenia's a saint or not, she dies. that [the whole play] tells us as much, like, this isn't a What If kind of retelling where she escapes her fate, this is a retelling examining itself like, she Will die because the story's preset, so what to do with this as the story that has to take her there, what to do with this as iphigenia who has to go there

that iphigenia takes on another narrative in addition to the one offered by like, violeta as guide and oracle telling her she has to die (As A Noble Sacrifice), that again (as per iphigenia in aulis being like uh hey daughter. let's go to aulis so you can uh marry achilles (it is to be sacrificed)) achilles is this bait, but it's only in the ending that there's any Story about being with achilles, and when iphigenia goes to the mercenary soldier who she knows will kill her, she's the one telling him what to tell her about where she's going and why, i want you to tell me achilles is waiting for me....and she still dies, because This Is The Story. as also applied to the reality, iphigenia as another dead and missing girl following & preceding many; any disappeared deaths when consumed as disposable & replaceable, not given part of any narrative about it. while also iphigenia only gets a chorus of fresa girls from there being crosses put on the factory wall with their names, with one girl even remarking like hey they spelled my name right for once. but at the same time they're also like, both mere Apparitions but also like standins for people who are simply alive. real [shades]esque kind of, i suppose, but like they're not Sanctified for dying either, they'll comment on iphigenia but not with any like, divine knowledge, just as this out of place rich girl. whether iphigenia's A Saint or Not A Saint, she's still dead either way. she wants to be a fresa girl, they maybe want to be her, but everyone's doomed anyways thanks to way larger forces and the Stories that have been told and will be told again

but there's also the moment right before the final section wherein, before she's having to say what she wants within the bounds of [she has to die], there's achilles asking "you still want me" and iphigenia answering with "i want everything" and her vision for, like, getting to be alive actually, i'm on the gulf where the sea is gray, and no one wants a piece of me....the whole inciting event here where iphigenia wants to evade her fate however she can, exiting the bounds of her life, the physical bounds and the family unit and walking away from the rank of status / class / wealth, trying for [have her body for herself] and what the body wants, the sensuous indulgences of (a rave fable), let's hear some more about the roman state like "we don't like the examination and challenge and upending of class and convention in a bacchanalia, so only do the official versions we permit;" the Threat of people's desires for themselves, when that's going to be counter to those in power who'd want these people to be resources at their disposal; the burden on the disempowered to suffer [the only way out is through] with the Additional pain & loss that has to be taken on in pursuit of their autonomy, while also of course suffering for the autonomy they lack, that restricted and controlled and mitigated versions of what you might want are deigned to be provided or permitted so that you have Something, but that everyone's actual undeniable personhood will always be spilling past those bounds, the potential power of transgressive pleasure when one's wellbeing and autonomous choices are counter to the power structures that have to constantly try to suppress and preclude this. achilles just as bait, doomed to die like iphigenia is also still doomed, sex was never going to save everyone and the [recognizing connection as these two parallel people / We're The Same] with your lover here is not going to save everyone but it still makes more things possible for them both; iphigenia does know what she wants, and gets some of it because she wants it, same with achilles in turn, while it can't save anyone from their fates still. but it can mean something even if it doesn't transcend, like even a fleeting night of insignificant dancing that doesn't change anything can mean something, and we all die, but that doesn't mean it's Nothing to be killed any more than it's Nothing to have your desires or choices one way or another to be wrung out of your life before you are

anyways, the stories. the Looking and Presenting here. achilles and iphigenia first encountering each other as images put together and presented by someone else for their own purposes. the presence of what's seen through film/camera/recording versus in person; the potential power relations and even violence in framing, presenting, and the intended looking and assessing. repeated language about eyes/looks that burn, while also that connection between iphigenia and achilles, and their finding the least room in what they do have of their lives for more of their own wants and selves and something genuine and not predetermined, is also connected to eyes and looking and being seen and light and burning. while they're also connected to the protection and possibility of night and darkness, getting to exist and be Without being lit up or seen; that with the power that's still in play, it's never like, well then you should have nothing / no reason to hide; the penultimate moment in the play with achilles being one that's in person and fades into darkness, rather than coming in from the light of a projection / video onscreen as the introduction....iphigenia needing to be guided through a crossroads to even get to achilles in person; violeta giving the Advice and Story and Tradition to pray to eleggua, as iphigenia does before getting to encounter achilles for real, who also doesn't get to break out of a role or a fate in full in any way, but their tragedies are like, pointing towards [autonomy, imagine it] in both the ways they manage to find a little bit of it for themselves, in no small part for simply recognizing each other as in the same boat here, and in the ways they still don't have it and still can't get it

and anyways it's also inevitably saying like, telling a story?? this Play is a told story!! looking? assessing? interpreting? you're doing that in the course of experiencing it! and it's really so fucking true.