#I asked if I could decide if I wanted it on my own at home and they said absolutely. and I obviously decided to move forward

[sundives]

Decode ✶ psh.

Learning from you that I can walk away, too.

Summary: You're the textbook definition of the perfect daughter. With everything laid out to you, the only thing you should do is follow the footsteps of your parents and become a doctor. If not, marry a soon-to-be doctor and be the perfect wife for him.

Easily, you can do both. Despite being a college student, you are already arranged to marry Park Sunghoon, the son of your parents' business partner. While you're doing everything to tie him to your perfect life, Sunghoon is very much determined to ran away from it, chasing after a dream of passion which you could never understand.

✰ Song inspiration: Decode by Sabrina Carpenter, Autumn by Niki, Already Over by Sabrina Carpenter

✰ Word Count: 23.9k (what the hell sure.)

✰ Tags: Arranged marriage, angst!!, a bit of unrequited love, hurt a little bit of comfort, lots of lots of miscommunication (these two can’t communicate ffs), angst with happy ending ig, short fluff, smut! College setting, reader is a perfectionist and soooo stubborn, Park Sunghoon is a mess, he’s also in a band. Mentions of drinking and alcohol, and mild violence. Toxic relationships, so much drama, Wonyoung and Ningning as your best friends, mentions of enhypen members, fancy dinners and shits, lots of cursing lmao. 

✰ CW: smut! Plot with little porn, loss of virginity (both of them are virgins lmao but they kinda know what to do though, don’t ask how), extremely soft vanilla sex!! P in v sex, short mutual masturbation, fingering, mentions of blood, use of condom (!!!), praise, big dick! Sunghoon, aftercare. I might have forgotten some but yeah, shitty smut hope you enjoy nonetheless.

✰ Asul’s note: okay med students don’t come to me, I know that you need to pass a board exam before attending med school, or not, i think that’s based on your undergraduate program sdkfkjddfk. (I base it on my country lmao) so inaccuracies about becoming a doctor might be present here, so now, I am apologizing for the inaccuracies. (anyways, this is a fanfic guys, let it slide.) This is also not proofread lmao.

Anyways, this is the second installment for Arcanum series yay! you guys loved Jay's fic that I decided to write for the other members. :D hope you enjoy this one. <3

Read Jay's fic here.

✰ Taglist: @kiikiisblog @bussolares @semi-wife @starry-eyed-bimbo @sievenderz @jakeslvt

-

You have a routine. 

By six in the morning, regardless if you have class that day, you’ll be awake. You start your day by taking a 5km walk in the community plaza in your subdivision, wherein the sun has already risen but not enough for you to feel hot. 

You should also be home by seven in the morning, wherein you do your morning routine like taking a bath, cooking breakfast, and maybe spare thirty minutes to read the book on your reading list before driving off to Decelis University. If you don’t have any classes that day, you’ll spend the day advance reading  your subjects. 

Everything in your life has always been like that. Having a routine keeps you organized, calms your mind and keeps your body circling everyday — leaving no room for mistakes, because making mistakes for you isn’t an ideal thing to do.

You’re the only child of your family. You grew up with loving parents who showered you with love and everything that you want. Spoiled but not rotten, everything wasn’t given to you in a snap. They always taught you that everything they give to you, should be repaired. Hence, you grew up with expectations given to you, and you have every determination not to fail your parents. 

That’s why you’re studying medical biology, following the footsteps of your father who owns the biggest medical center in your city. Ever since your father exposed you to his work, your dream has been to become a doctor like him, and they were happy that you’re following their path. 

While they are anticipating for you to become a doctor, your parents didn’t hesitate to give you a second option — a doctor’s wife like your mother. Someone who tends to their husband, becoming a housewife or trophy wife who spends their husband’s money with no problem, your mother would always joke. 

Coincidentally, your parents didn’t even let you choose between the options because easily, you can have both. While your ring finger remains empty, you know you’re bound to be married to someone by the time you graduate college. 

“Sunghoon,” you called out, shaking the boy’s shoulder. You were given a short groan as Sunghoon turned sideways and covered his head with the blanket.

“Sunghoon, wake up! We have class at ten!” you shouted, pulling the blanket once again. It didn’t take a minute for Sunghoon to sit up with a loud groan escaping his lips. 

“y/n, it’s only eight in the morning, you can go to Decelis if you want to, but let me fucking rest for another hour,” he said mindlessly, eyes still close. 

“You’ll skip class again because you overslept,” you pointed out. “Are you still drunk?”

“I have a hangover, thanks for asking,” Sunghoon replied sarcastically. “Also, why do you care if I skip class for today? It’s just a minor subject for fuck’s sake, just go.” 

“Make sure you go to Decelis today,” you reminded before leaving his room. Sunghoon didn’t even bother replying to you, he only lay down in his bed once again and dozed off, which only made you heave a sigh. 

You’ve known Park Sunghoon ever since you two were kids. You remember the first time you two met, at his father’s birthday, wherein he played the piano for the audience. You watched as he effortlessly played a song you’re unfamiliar with. Eyes locked at him, it was the first time you felt that rush of in your heart, cheeks heating up as you admired him from where you were standing. 

Ever since that day, you wanted to marry Sunghoon. His parents own the largest pharmaceutical company in your district which means that he’s bound to inherit his parents’ business. You think that it was destiny. If you two were to get married, your parents’ businesses would merge and you envision yourself as a doctor along with Sunghoon. 

It was as if the perfect life had been given to you. While you never formally requested to your parents that you wanted to marry Sunghoon, they pretty much set you two up. You grew up with Sunghoon, played and studied with him, and went to the same school together. 

He was your best friend. Although the lingering crush inside you still gives you butterflies every time you’re with Sunghoon, your platonic love for him still outweighs. You two passed Decelis University together, but before you two entered college, the formal arrangement between the two of you was held in a private dinner — completely shattering your relationship with him. 

From there, everything changed, the wariness that you two will get married after graduation lingers, and the fact that you two were forced to live in a house together, alone, made it more awkward for the two of you. 

Both your parents insisted that it’s for you two to prepare for your marriage. At first, it was hard to adjust, having small talks and walking on eggshells during the first few months despite you two growing up together. But slowly, you two had become well-adjusted with each other.

Going to Decelis together, study dates, and senseless conversations after dinner happened because not only you two live together, you two are also classmates. You two became well-known in your department. With your family’s background and reputation, everyone knows that you two are engaged to each other, and by the end of your freshman year, you two were considered as the medical sciences department’s “power couple.” 

Although you two had adjusted well, the two of you knew that what you had were only platonic, two best friends who live together under the same roof, ignoring the future that awaits for both of you. 

But when sophomore year came, Sunghoon formed a band along with some friends and a junior of his, and they named it, “Arcanum,” and ever since that day, Sunghoon was no longer the Sunghoon that you knew. 

You always thought that his talent for piano will only be a talent of his, but you didn’t expect it to become a passion that he will come chasing after. Ever since Arcanum happened, the sound of his keyboard can be heard all over your house, and instead of medical books and notes from your subjects being on his table, it has become lyrical sheets and chords that only Sunghoon can read. 

While Sunghoon still excels in class and passes his subjects with ease, it’s not hard to ignore that his college program isn’t his priority anymore. You found yourself alone in your house every night, Sunghoon separating from you by the end of the class because he has a gig or band practice. Sometimes he goes home drunk, and you’re wondering why the hell he is letting himself get drunk despite his low alcohol tolerance. 

You know that it’ll get worse if he continues doing it. You tried to talk him out of it but Sunghoon got angry with you instead, lashing out that why can’t you just support his passion instead. It was the first time he ever got angry with you and yet, it fueled something in you, the way he looked at you that night, you’re convinced that he’s not the Sunghoon that you know — which persisted you more to make him go back to the way he was. 

You tried. Everyday, you tried to make sure he goes to his class, waking him up and checking up on him became part of your routine. But it all seems useless because the more you pick up Sunghoon’s mess, the more he becomes annoyed at you. It became something you two always fought about, slowly you two didn’t realise that you two had drifted apart. 

“Class dismissed,” the professor announced. You could only close your notebook as you shake your head with disappointment.

Sunghoon didn’t show up, he’s probably in his room, still asleep. You hated how he didn’t show up, and all of it is because of a hangover from yesterday’s gig. You always told him that he shouldn’t drink during school days but it’s Sunghoon, he never listens to you. 

As you  grabbed your things and placed them in your bag, your professor called you out suddenly, which made you head towards him. 

“Yes sir?” you asked. 

“It’s about Sunghoon,” he started, your eyes widened but you only nodded, it wasn’t a surprise to you that your professors go to you if there’s any concerns regarding your fiance.

“He might as well drop my subject because he’s already failing,” your professor explained.

“What?” you asked, almost stumbling on your own tongue.

“He’s been absent for the past few weeks, and you know that attendance is still a crucial part of my subject. If he keeps on missing my classes, he’ll receive a failing grade in my subject, no considerations,” he said with a stern voice. 

You kept quiet for a moment, but only nodded. “I will inform him about this one, thank you so much sir.”

“I know that Arcanum is slowly becoming popular, but he still has to prioritize his studies,” your professor comments. 

You only gave him a formal smile before excusing yourself. As soon as you reached the hallway, you felt yourself in relief, but there was a hurtful tug on your heart. You couldn’t help but to grab your phone, dialing Sunghoon’s number. 

But all your calls went to his voicemail, you only stared at your phone, frozen from where you were standing. Your heart is beating at an abnormal pace and you hate that feeling.

You’re nervous. You hated feeling nervous. You’re nervous about Sunghoon, if he fails this subject, he’ll be delayed to graduate. He can’t delay. No, you two were supposed to graduate this year and after a few months, you two will get married before attending medical school. That’s the plan. There shouldn’t be any other options other than that. 

Of course you have to tell him about it, but the question was, does Sunghoon care? That’s what scares you the most. Because there’s a large possibility that he doesn’t care about it, he’ll let himself fail a subject if it means proving you wrong.

You couldn’t concentrate for the remaining day. Thoughts keep running in your mind, and to make it worse, none of your subjects were attended by Sunghoon. You don’t know his whereabouts since he wasn’t replying to your texts and calls, and you know that you’re going home to an empty house again.

Sunghoon is probably in his gig again, or maybe practicing somewhere. That’s what you thought when you entered the house, and your guess is right, it was empty and dark. As you close the door, there’s a small pain in your heart staring at the huge yet hollow house, wondering if this would be the house that you’ll go home to in a few years.

But your pondering was interrupted when you felt your phone vibrating, as you grabbed it and opened, you were surprised that Sunghoon’s calling you. 

“I’ve been calling you since earlier!” you shouted the moment you answered the call. 

“My parents’ are here, I spent the day with them in case you’re wondering why I was absent for today,” Sunghoon said boredly, and despite his cold tone, you were relieved to hear his explanation.

“You should’ve told me that instead of having me wonder where the hell are you,” you replied.

“Get dressed, they’re taking us out for dinner, I know you’re home by now, so we’ll pick you around thirty minutes,” and with that, Sunghoon ends the call. He didn’t even acknowledge your answer. You could only look at your phone for a minute before deciding to go to your room and find a nice outfit for dinner. 

Sunghoon’s parents  are a lovely couple who treated you like their own daughter. As soon as they arrive at your place to pick you up, Mrs. Park immediately approaches you with a smile on her face, hugging you tightly which you only reciprocate. 

“Y/n dear! Look at you, so pretty as ever,” she said with a smile, brushing your hair which only made you smile wider. “Don’t get too stressed, okay? I know with graduation nearing, it can be stressful for you two. Just don’t worry about your marriage, focus on your studies first.”

You only let out a small chuckle, “of course auntie, thank you for the concern.”

“You’re looking out for Sunghoon,” she whispered, knowing that the subject was in the room. “It can be hard sometimes, right? I’m just happy that you’re the one that he’s going to marry. He doesn’t know how lucky he is.”

The smile on your face almost slipped, but you managed to give her a nod. The beaming smile on Mrs. Park’s lips make you wonder what she would feel if she learned about how disastrous her son is now — or how his fiance couldn’t even tame him down. 

“Of course, thank you for putting your trust in me.” instead, fake words slipped out of your mouth perfectly even though you were itching to snitch your fiance to his mother. 

Mrs. Park only pats your cheeks one last time before calling out Mr. Park and Sunghoon, indicating that the four of you should go now. 

Arriving at the restaurant, the four of you went straight to the VIP room where food was already served. Dinner immediately commenced with a few talks and chit-chats.

“Graduation is near,” Mr. Park said in the middle of the dinner, glancing at you and Sunghoon. “Any plans? University of choice for your med school?”

“Decelis’ medical school is one of the top,” you answered diligently. “I might stay there.”

“Ah, I do remember, both your parents attended Decelis Medical School, good choice for you y/n,” Mr. Park pointed out. 

“How about you Sunghoon dear?” Mrs. Park asked. 

You only glanced at Sunghoon who busied himself with the food. He gives his parents a bored stare before picking up the meat on his plate, “Probably Decelis too.”

“Ah I see, you don’t want to get separated from y/n, such a sweetheart,” Mrs. Park teasingly said. 

Sunghoon softly scoffs, making you glance at him. His action were left unnoticed by his parents. When Sunghoon glanced at you, he raised an eyebrow, and you wanted to say something but you held yourself back. Knowing that you two are just putting up a show to his parents.

The remaining hours were filled with nothing but silence, which you are used to. Talks about college were all the conversation revolved around, and somehow, Sunghoon managed to answer his parents’ questions like he was a diligent student who’s top of his class. 

“Take care of the two of you okay? We’ll see you during your break,” after a few goodbyes and hugs, Sunghoon’s parents have left the two of you back in your house. The two of you watched their car leave and with that, Sunghoon turns around and enters the house. 

You followed him, heels clanking against the marble floor. You watched as he unbuttons his sleeved shirt’s button, walking towards his room when you called him out. 

“You should be glad that I didn’t tell them that you’re on the edge of failing a subject,” you blurted out. 

Sunghoon merely laughs in disbelief, “oh, now I should be glad that you saved my ass earlier? Thank you then.”

You chose to ignore his sarcastic remark, “Sunghoon, you can’t give up now, we’re graduating, do you really want to get yourself delayed?” 

Sunghoon only stared at you, “what if I do? Is there something you can do about it?”

You only blink for a second. “Fine, go on and get delayed, fail a subject if you want to. But do I have to remind you that Arcanum’s a university band? And by Decelis’ rules, they allow bands to perform as long as they don’t have a failing grade? So if you want to be so hard-headed about not attending class, say goodbye to your band then.” 

“You’re so annoying aren’t you? Using Arcanum just so I can continue studying medicine,” Sunghoon exhales. 

A haunting smirk plastered on your face, “oh no sweetheart, I’m just reminding you that you can’t chase after Arcanum, especially when it’s still tied in Decelis and your studies. So maybe rethink your life choices now before your parents find out about the mess that you’ve been doing.” 

Sunghoon mockingly laughs, “you’re such a stuck-up to my parents.”

“Then make a fucking choice Hoon,” you challenged. “Them finding out through me or Decelis? Either way, it’s not going to end well, so fix yourself and get some sleep tonight. We have class tomorrow at eight. Goodnight to you.”

You end the conversation by passing by him. Going straight to your room where you immediately locked yourself. You lean against the door, Eyes shutting tightly as you try to steady your breathing. You can feel all the energy leaving your body, wanting nothing more to sleep.

You always say to yourself that you won’t give up on Sunghoon, but days like these feel like every effort you give to him is useless. 

-

The following day, you and Sunghoon arrived at Decelis University together, creating a buzz in the campus. It was a rare occurrence for you to attend together.

Everyone knows. It's obvious that your relationship has been becoming astray, and yet, your “power couple” status remains the same. No one attempted to pursue you nor girls couldn’t flirt with Sunghoon not only because you two are tied together, but because you two are deemed untouchable because of your background. 

You two entered the classroom, Sunghoon going to the corner seat near the window while you opted for the second row near the aisle. A few mutters can be heard, but you chose to ignore it, getting used to people talking about you and Sunghoon’s ‘stray relationship.’

The day goes on, classes and laboratories continue on and on, and you’ve done the class with ease. You didn’t talk to Sunghoon but you observed that he managed to catch up with your lectures despite his absences. Natural Sunghoon, he can be gone for half of the semester, and still manage to top his grades. 

“Go home already,” Sunghoon said to you by the end of the class. “I have a gig tonight.”

You only gave him a bitter smile, “of course you have.”

But instead of leaving you there, Sunghoon raised an eyebrow, “you know this y/n.”

“And I’m used to it,” you sharply said. “Why are you still standing there? Go now before I convince you to not go to your gig tonight.’

Sunghoon gave you another look before turning around, watching him leave the classroom as you stood there. Short conversations, sarcastic remarks, and bitter statements that’ll lead to arguments. You wonder when will this end?

“What’s wrong? You’re out of focus today,” Yizhuo asked with a worried tone. You only place your tennis racket down as you grab your water bottle.

“Just the same usual thing,” you answer, sitting on the bench as your best friend did the same thing. She places her hand on your thigh, lightly patting it. 

“Sunghoon again? You know you should stop chasing after him.”

“It’s not that I am chasing him, I’m already tied to him —” you heaved out another heavy sigh. “He’s the one chasing after a dream. Bands? What’s his future with them? After college, they’ll be gone, it’s not like they’ll continue playing after college.”

“He seems to be so passionate about it,” Yizhuo pointed out. “Watched their performance last week at The Rabbit Hole, they’re great by the way.”

“He should be focusing on med school,” you explained. “But he’s out there performing and getting drunk, I don’t know Ning, I don’t know what to do with him. His parents trusted me to take care of him —”

“There you go again, worrying about things that aren’t your control,” your best friend gently pats your back. “You know, you can always back out of the marriage? You’re still young! You might even meet someone better in med school.”

That’s when you stifle a laugh, “how can I? My parents arranged this one.”

“Ran away! Do you really want to spend your life with that idiot?”

You didn’t answer your friend. Your smile disappeared, and for a moment, you only looked at the court where strangers were playing tennis. Your focus shifted to the tennis ball bouncing back and forth from the players until it went out of the court. 

“I do,” you said softly, because from the very start, it has always been Sunghoon. You couldn’t imagine yourself looking for others when Sunghoon is right there from the very start. 

“You’re going to let yourself be a fool for him huh?” Yizhuo asked with a disappointed tone. 

But you only looked at your best friend with a determined smile, “no, I’m going to make him quit the band.”

“You know you’re already doing it but nothing’s changing,” Yizhuo said. You only gave her a smile before standing up from the bench, you two went back to the table where your bags are located. 

“Then I just have to keep on trying more,” you pointed out, fishing out your phone, you opened it and saw missed calls from Sunghoon — which is a surprise. 

You pressed Sunghoon’s number and after a few rings, it answered. 

“Hello?” an unfamiliar voice called. 

“Hello, who is this?” you asked.

“It’s Heeseung, Sunghoon’s bandmate.”

“Oh! I remember you, you study education right?”

Heeseung faintly chuckles from the background, “yes, that would be me, but listen, uhm…Sunghoon’s drunk right now —”

“Already? It’s only ten in the evening.” 

“Yeah, but you know his alcohol tolerance — listen, uhm can you pick him up? He’s passed out on the couch but doesn’t want to get inside Jay’s car for some reason.” you can sense Heeseung’s apologetic tone, which only made you roll your eyes.

“It’s not like I can leave him there right? Can you send me the location, I’ll be there in a few minutes, I’m just at Decelis’ tennis club,” you said.

“I’ll send it right now, thank you y/n.” And with that, the call ended. You grabbed your bag and bid Yizhuo goodbye. 

“Just reminding you that you can always leave him!” your best friend shouted, and you only gave her a glare before sprinting towards your car.

Sunghoon’s location drove you to a huge house, just a few blocks away from the university. Parking your car nearby, you got off from it and headed towards the entrance, ringing the bell twice. 

The door opened, revealing a tall and familiar guy who you assumed was Heeseung.

“You’re here, that’s great, we’ll get Sunghoon but come in first,” he said with a smile, you only nod as you enter the house. 

“You’re Heeseung right?” you asked as you two walked towards the living room. Heeseung stops and looks at you, he looks surprised but only nods. 

“Yeah, this is probably the first time we met, I only see you inside the campus and that’s a rare occurrence.” he said. 

Entering the living room, the first thing you saw was Sunghoon flat-out dead on the couch while some boys were cleaning the mess on the coffee table along with some girls. Can beers and bottles of vodkas placed on the table along with some snacks, while their instruments are set-up on a corner. 

“He said that he was on a gig,” you stated, walking towards Sunghoon. 

“Yeah, we just finished it earlier and he kinda insisted that we celebrate it,” Heeseung shrugs. 

“He has the guts to drink his heart out and then not go to class the next day,” you muttered under breath as you lightly shake Sunghoon’s shoulder.

“He’s not gonna wake up anytime soon,” said another voice. “I’m Jay, and this is Jungwon.”

“Hi, sorry for the hassle,” the blonde boy said.

“I’m sorry for Sunghoon too, I feel like you guys always have to take care of him whenever he’s like this.” 

“We’re used to it, no worries,” Jay assured. 

“And that worries me more because he just doesn’t stop,” you pointed out. “You’ll end up tolerating his bad habits.”

No one said a thing. The three of them watched as you attempted to pull Sunghoon to sit up from his place, you were struggling but you were persistent.

They know how much you dislike Arcanum, seeing it as nothing but a university band who performs. Despite all of Sunghoon’s rants and complaints about you, the remaining three decided to be civil with you since they know that you’re going to be Sunghoon’s future wife.

“If that’s your worry, we don’t tolerate bad habits here,” Heeseung breaks the silence approaching you as he lifts Sunghoon on his shoulders, along with the other two who held his limbs. 

“That’s not my only worry,” you whispered, Heeseung glances at you before proceeding to carry Sunghoon outside towards your car. 

They set him neatly on the passenger seat, Sunghoon didn’t move nor made a sound as they put on his seatbelt. It’s safe to assume that he’s passed-out drunk and frustration is written all over your face. They weren’t that stupid to notice it, Sunghoon has lately become too attached with alcohol.

“You guys know that he’s studying medicine right? After college, he’s going to med school,” you asked them, who only glanced at each other, knowing that it’s the total opposite of what Sunghoon has been telling them. 

“If he keeps going on like this, I don’t know what will happen to him in the future,” you said one last time before going inside your car and driving away from the place. 

The silence was devouring, you kept on glancing at Sunghoon from time to time, checking if he had gained consciousness or not. You only tighten your hold on the steering wheel as you speeden your drive towards your place. 

As you arrive at your house, that’s when you face the challenge of carrying Sunghoon inside your place. You opened the door of the passenger seat and lightly shake Sunghoon’s shoulder. He didn’t budge for a moment, that’s when you called out his name, shaking it harsher than before. 

You watch as Sunghoon’s eyebrows knit, letting out a frustrated groan as he attempts to open his eyes. 

“Get up now, we’re home,” you told him.

“y/n?” he asked before closing his eyes. 

“Sunghoon! Wake up please!” you pleaded. But he didn’t move again, so you stood there, thinking about what to do with him. That’s when you used all your strength to swing his heavy arms around your shoulders but as soon as you attempted to pull him out of the car, he didn’t budge. 

“Fucking hell,” you curse, removing his shoulder. This time, you shake his head while screaming his name. For a few seconds, he opens his eyes confused and drowsy. 

“Just lean on me,” you instructed, you grabbed his shoulders once again and this time, Sunghoon managed to move on his own, leaning his huge body against yours. You could only groan as you helped him walk inside your house. 

You didn’t even manage to reach his room, Sunghoon found himself stumbling in the living room — towards the couch where you couldn’t do anything but to fix his position. You left the living room and returned in a minute with a blanket and a pillow for him. 

Gently, you place the pillow below his head and put the blanket on him. Then you stood there, eyes never leaving Sunghoon who’s sleeping now. You kneeled in front of him, brushing his messy bangs so that you could see his face closer.

“What am I going to do with you Hoon?” you whispered, eyes never leaving his face. Sunghoon looks so peaceful and gentle in his sleep — this is probably the only time you see him this peaceful. 

A bitter smile escapes your lips because the more you look at him, the more it slowly sinks into you that tomorrow won’t be like this.  “Goodnight Sunghoon,” you mumbled, patting his head one last time before returning to your room. 

-

Your routine was disrupted when Sunghoon barged into the kitchen, angry and frustrated. 

“Y/n!? What the fuck!?” you stopped your tracks, turning off the stove before turning around to see a disheveled and mad Sunghoon in front of you. 

“Is there something wrong?” you asked.

“Don’t act so fucking innocent now, you know what you did,” Sunghood accused you. 

“Maybe get straight to the point rather than pointing fingers on me,” you replied. 

“You told my friends about med school,” he answered. “Now they think that Arcanum’s messing up my future.”

“Well isn’t it? Sunghoon, you really think that you’re going to play in that band forever?” you taunted. It’s been a few days since you had a talk with his band members. The following day that time, everything seems to be normal for you — not until now that Sunghoon had discovered it. 

“What if I want to? What if I told you that I am not planning to go to med school and I want to perform instead?” he taunted back, stepping forward in front of you which made you step backward, trapping you between the kitchen counter. 

“That’s not what’s planned Sunghoon,” you breathe, forehead creasing as you only stare at him dead. “You knew from the start, ever since we got engaged — engagement, college, marriage, then med school. That was the plan.”

“Have you ever thought that maybe things might change y/n? Maybe I want to perform now rather than take over my father’s business.”

“So you’ll be a disappointment?” you mocked. “You’ll go after your dream? Performing stupid songs and covers rather than repaying your parents’ efforts on you?”

“At least I know what I want, can’t say that to you since you can’t decide for yourself,” Sunghoon mocks. 

A stinging pain burned on Sunghoon’s cheeks. It took him a minute to sink in what you just did, but he could only laugh mockingly as your eyes remained at him, wide but filled with anger. Your palms numbed as it rounded to conceal yourself from doing it again.

“At least I know what’s best for me, and you may not like it but we’re engaged Sunghoon, and I’m not going to let our future be ruined by some mere passion of yours,” you stated, gritting your teeth as your stare became cold. 

Sunghoon didn’t say another word. His eyes speak for it that he’s angry, and he’s only controlling himself from hurting you despite the fact that you hurt him first. You could only stare at him, not attempting to back down. 

But it was as if there’s an angel watching over you, the doorbell rang, indicating a visitor. The two of you turned your head towards the door, and before anyone could say another word, you pushed Sunghoon out of your way, walking towards the door and opening it. 

“Wonyoung!?” you shouted, surprised to see your best friend. 

“Surprise!” the girl shouted in glee, stretching her arms to pull you a hug which you dearly reciprocated. 

“Oh my god, you’re here?” you asked, breaking out from the hug.

“I just got back from Milan and went straight here,” Wonyoung winks before she steps inside your house, your eyes following her as she goes to Sunghoon. 

“Sunghoon! I miss you!” Wonyoung shouted, embracing Sunghoon who only reciprocated it. 

“Long time no see, Wonnie,” Sunghoon gently said.

“It’s great — what happened to your face?” Wonyoung asked, seeing his left cheeks red. 

“Bumped on a wall, but it doesn’t hurt,” Sunghoon lied, before glancing at you who only stared at him coldly.

Wonyoung seems to be convinced by it, laughing it off before pulling you two to a hug. Squealing how much she has missed you two — oblivious about the fight that happened just minutes ago. 

“Do you want some drinks? Come on, sit down for a while,” Sunghoon insisted, ignoring you as he ushered Wonyoung towards the living room. You immediately noticed how Sunghoon’s face lit up, his smile becoming wider that his eyes turned into two curves — the first time in the many months that you saw Sunghoon’s genuine smile. 

It wasn’t always you and Sunghoon ever since you two were kids — there were the three of you. 

Wonyoung is a best friend of yours. A sister that you always needed. She’s a free-spirited girl who always indulges in fun even if it means getting the three of you in trouble. 

Unlike you and Sunghoon, Wonyoung’s family is richer. She was rich enough to have a choice not to attend college and spend her parents’ money that won’t even dent their bank account. While you and Sunghoon are studying in Decelis, Wonyoung was traveling a lot, attending fashion weeks, and brand launches. Slowly, she became a well-known influencer and socialite that collaborates with well-known brands and walks for their runway. It was hard to get a glimpse of her, that’s why it surprised you that she’s here in the city. 

“So, what brings you here instead of going back to our hometown?” you asked, placing the glass of juice in front of her. 

“Mom and dad’s here, they’re actually planning on renewing their vows — oh by the way, you two are invited there and so are your parents, it’s an intimate event but you know them, they want it grandiose and perfect, so I have to help in organizing it,” Wonyoung diligently said. “And I miss you guys! It’s been like a year since we last hung out, hopefully I’m not intruding on whatever plans you have though.”

Talking about wrong timing. You thought. Everything is crumbling between you and Sunghoon but you don’t want Wonyoung to know about that, so you only gave her smile and said, “everything’s fine, a bit hectic because it’s senior year, but it’s a rare case that you’re here, so we’ll make time.” 

Wonyoung only pouts, “you guys, I really miss you, seriously! I love my job but it gets lonely sometimes.”

“You can always go back to college,” Sunghoon teased, making Wonyoung glare at him. 

“Ugh, you dumbass, if I returned to college, you guys would have already graduated!” Wonyoung whined while Sunghoon only laughed. 

“Anyways, I just dropped by to show up to you guys, just tell me when you guys are free, maybe we could go out for dinner — oh, I wanted to see Decelis too! How’s that sound?” Wonyoung delightfully suggested. 

“We’ll make time for you Won, just tell us when you’re free,” Sunghoon answered, making you glance at him. 

Wonyoung only smiled at the answer. She told the two of you that she’s free all the time since there’s not much preparation going on. As she bid goodbye to you, you only gave her a short smile before she was walked out of the door by Sunghoon. Watching the two of them exchange banters before Sunghoon closes the door. 

You stood up from your seat, ready to leave when Sunghoon cornered you immediately. 

“You think we’re done? I’m not done yet y/n,” Sunghoon growled. 

But you only gave him a bored smile, “Wonyoung’s here Hoon, can we just not do this? I don’t want her seeing us fight —”

“You care more about what others think of us huh? Of course, you don’t want everyone to see the ‘perfect daughter’ imperfect.”

“It’s seldom for us to see Wonnie, I don’t want her to think that our friendship is ruined, we’re the only one that she has,” you pointed out. 

“Well, too bad for her, it’s already ruined, the moment both of us got engaged.” Sunghoon didn’t even let you say another word. He eventually went back to his room, slamming the door loudly like he always does. 

You remained there standing, words deeply cutting through your mind. You looked at Sunghoon’s door once again, before heaving a sigh. The palm of your hand remained heavy, guilt swallowing you knowing that perhaps, you went too far this time. 

-

Over the weekend, the three of you went out as per Wonyoung’s request. Going to a nearby mall where you three had brunch, played at the arcade, and even took photos at the photobooth. The whole day felt nice for you, it felt like you three are back as teens who would sneak out at night just to hangout and drive around town. 

While you and Sunghoon are still not okay, a silent truce was made for Wonyoung. You two never tried to argue or fight whenever she’s around, and although it can be suffocating for the both of you, you two tried to act as normal as possible. 

“I do wonder what would happen to us if I stayed and studied college,” Wonyoung ponders. The three of you decided to have ramen and convenience store snacks by the end of the day, opting to watch the sunset at a nearby park. It was Wonyoung’s request because she was curious what it feels like, seeing it on social media not knowing that this is also the first time you and Sunghoon had experienced it. 

“What makes you think about that?” you asked.

Wonyoung only smiles, “you guys seem to be so secured with your future, becoming doctors and stuff, while me? I don’t know what I am doing.”

“You’re doing what you love,” Sunghoon butts in. “And that matters, you know? At least you love what you’re doing, not because it’ll secure you a good future.” 

You know what Sunghoon was trying to say, but you remained quiet, watching as Wonyoung nodded at Sunghoon’s advice. 

“You’re right, I do love the free pr packages and clothes,” Wonyoung jokes, laughing before pulling you two to a hug. “You guys are the best, hope nothing changes with the three of us.”

A meaningful glance was exchanged between you and Sunghoon. Not one said a word, only actions spoke as both of you embraced your best friend back.

The following week, Decelis University had a one-day event, cancelling academic activities which was an opportunity for you to invite Wonyoung to tour around Decelis. She arrived around three in the afternoon, hugging you and Sunghoon as she complained how organizing her parents’ renewal of vows became hectic, happy that she was able to relax for today. 

The tour went on with ease, Wonyoung was curioused at the different department buildings of Decelis since its structure differed from others. Taking photos using her film camera which she used to take photos of the three of you too. 

“So this is called the lover’s garden because lovers often come here?” Wonyoung asked, pointing at Decelis’ botanical garden which is actually for botany and biology students. 

“More like a lover's hideaway, it’s pitch black there during night, I’m leaving up to your imagination what couples do there,” Sunghoon explains, a teasing smile on his lips as Wonyoung’s face distorted in disgust. 

“Ew! Why can’t you guys book a hotel room or something,” she commented and yet, her camera was ready. “Oh well, might as well take a picture of both of you —”

“What?” you asked, appalled. “Won, we never did it.”

“And save myself from imagining you two banging, just stand in front of the entrance! You guys are a couple right? Come on now, you two don’t have a photo together!” Wonyoung insisted. 

An exchange of glances was given, but before you could even complain once again, Sunghoon pulled you towards the entrance. 

“Come on now, the more you complain, the more Wonyoung will insist,” Sunghoon boredly explained. You didn’t say a word, you stood there before facing the camera. 

“Pose! You guys are so stiff, it’s like you two aren’t in love with each other,” Wonyoung taunted before preparing her camera again. 

Funny because you two aren’t at all. But no protest was made when Sunghoon swings his arms around your shoulder before pulling you closer. You can feel your heart skip a beat, but it was immediately reminded by your mind. The more you complain, the more Wonyoung insists. Sunghoon did it so that it can be finished early, so you fake a smile as Wonyoung clicks the button. 

She stares at the screen, smiles wide as she looks at you two, “you guys are perfect for each other.” 

“Very funny Won,” you sarcastically replied.

After the endless walking and tour, you three stumbled at your building’s cafeteria, buying drinks as Wonyoung is still in awe about your university, totally immersing herself with your college life. 

“What about dinner? I’m pretty sure you guys have a lot of good eateries around,” Wonyoung suggested, it was five-thirty in the afternoon, the sun was almost setting which meant that it's time for early dinner for most students.

“You guys can go on,” Sunghoon said, standing from his seat. “I have to go, I have a gig.”

You internally scoff, even if Wonyoung’s here, Sunghoon couldn’t bear to miss his band’s gig.

“Wait, can we watch?” Wonyoung excitedly asked, making the two of you look at her.

“Ask y/n if she wants to,” Sunghoon bitterly said, and you only looked away from him, rolling your eyes. 

“What? You haven’t seen Sunghoon’s gig?” your best friend asked, confused before gazing her eyes back to Sunghoon.

Your lips tightened, “I’m busy…I don’t have time —”

“Then this is a great time to watch his gig! Come on!”

You weren’t able to object, Wonyoung was so excited that it only left you quiet as she pulled you away from your seat. 

Arcanum’s weekly gig was held at The Rabbit Hole — a mixture of coffee shop and bar lounge under Decelis University’s funding. The place was cozy, designed with vintage interiors with a small stage place in the end. This is the first time you went to that place, almost surprised to see that it’s full of people; locals, students, and probably fans of Arcanum crowded the small establishment. 

You and Wonyoung find yourself at a table for two far from the stage but enough to see their performance. Sunghoon excuses himself as he went to the back room where it serves as Arcanum’s waiting room. 

“Do you even know that Sunghoon plays in the band?” Wonyoung jokes, eyes never leaving the menu on her hand. 

“I do, I just don’t have time to watch his performance,” you half-lied. The truth is, you never tried to find time to watch their performance. For what? You always say to Sunghoon whenever he invites you to his gig, you rather spend the time studying or doing something much important for you. 

“Well I’m glad I’m here because we’re going to watch him perform!” your best friend giggled, you only gave her a small smile before glancing at the menu once again. 

While waiting for your food to arrive, you noticed how the place slowly became full to the point that there weren’t any tables left and some people opted to stand instead. Your eyes never left the crowd, wondering if this is the usual situation to Arcanum’s gig. 

Around seven in the evening, your food arrived but you were startled when the crowd started screaming — mostly girls of course, making you shift your attention at the stage.

There they were, Arcanum. The four-member band of Decelis University. They changed their school uniform with a casual street-style outfit. Your eyes fixated on Sunghoon who’s wearing a football jersey, pairing it with a huge chain necklace and cargo pants.

You watch as he busies himself with his keyboard — the instrument that he bought by saving up his allowance. You remember how he excitedly unboxed it in the living room, even testing it out while you sat on the couch reviewing for your midterm exams. Somehow, he was careful with it, caring for it like it’s his own child. 

“Wow, we have a full house tonight!” your attention immediately caught on Heeseung who’s in the center, holding a bass guitar as his smile was wide and gleaming. Screams can be heard from the crowd, a fangirl even shouted “I love you Heeseung!” which only made the vocalist chuckle. 

“Before that, let’s have a crowd check don’t we? Who's here for the first time?” Heeseung asked, raising his hands which a few in the crowd followed. 

“Us! It’s our first time!” you were startled when Wonyoung shouted loudly, standing up from her seat as she grabbed your hands and raised it together with hers — caughting Heeseung’s attention, an evident smirk on the male’s lips can be seen.

“Oh? I am seeing familiar faces here, do we Hoon?” the vocalist teased, Sunghoon only smirked as he crossed his arms. 

“I have to impress my guests, so you better do your best Hee,” Sunghoon nonchalantly replied before glancing at the two of you. Eyes immediately locking on yours as he raised his eyebrow knowingly — like he was telling you that he was meant to be there, performing. 

“Well better set the mood right, come on guys,” with that, Heeseung signals the band and at the count of three, they start playing synchronically. 

The crowd started screaming. You can see it, how synergized they were. They weren’t just there to perform, they were also having fun. The way Heeseung interacted with the crowd along with Jay, making the small stage as his own. He then stands in front of the microphone stand, singing the first line of a song unfamiliar to you. 

“The vocalist sounds so good!” you hear Wonyoung exclaim and you only nod at her words, it is true that Heeseung was good, but your eyes darted to Sunghoon. 

There he was, blending in the background along with Jungwon who’s at the drums, but compared to the junior, Sunghoon wasn’t banging his head as the drumsticks slammed against the drums. He wasn’t like Heeseung who controls the crowd, nor Jay who’s rocking his electric guitar like crazy. 

Sunghoon was there like a quiet mystery, a controlled relaxed expression as he immersed himself with playing the keyboard, a few head nods as his chords synchronised with others. You could only blink, deja vu hitting you all of the sudden — you remember the first time you saw Sunghoon. 

He bores the same expression that he had back when he was young. Your gaze locked on him, not noticing how your eyes met each other, but quickly, Sunghoon looked away and continued playing. Something inside you was burning, strangely your heart was beating like crazy as you watched Sunghoon perform.

You didn’t even notice that the song was finished. The crowd applauded and cheered for them, Heeseung jokingly bows before asking if the crowd wants some more. 

Throughout the whole gig, your eyes never left Sunghoon. Throughout their whole performance, you watch him change his expression more than the duration that you two had lived together, but all only fell into one conclusion — Sunghoon was happy to perform. You can see it from the way he was serious while playing the keyboard up to the way he joked with his bandmates, letting out small laughter and eye smiles throughout the small break. 

The gig ends around nine in the evening. As they stepped down from the stage, people swarmed them excitedly. Asking for pictures and small talks. You watch as Sunghoon happily accepts his fans’ request, taking pictures with them, which made Wonyoung laugh, knowing that Sunghoon can be awkward with strangers.

“Congrats! You guys are so awesome!” Wonyoung exclaimed as soon as Sunghoon approached you two. 

“Thanks Won,” Sunghoon quietly said, before glancing at you. A moment of silence hovered between the two of you before Wonyoung nudged you. 

“You did great,” you told him, giving him a small smile afterwards. 

Sunghoon’s eyes widened, surprised by your words. You only looked away, embarrassed while Sunghoon’s gaze remained at you. 

“Thank you,” he said softly. 

“It’s nothing Hoon,” you quickly turned down. 

The night ended with the three of you remaining at The Rabbit Hole for some light dinner and drinks. Sunghoon introduced Arcanum to you and Wonyoung once again, and it wasn’t a surprise that Wonyoung got along with them easily. You remain quiet throughout the night, listening to their conversation while you only take your space at the end of the table — knowing that you don’t relate to them at all.

Around eleven in the evening, you drop Wonyoung off to the hotel where she was staying, reminding you about her parents’ second wedding before bidding you two goodbye. The drive back to your home was quiet, an awkward atmosphere that both of you couldn’t comprehend. You can feel Sunghoon’s glance at you at every minute but you chose to ignore it, too tired to give it a meaning. 

“Do you mean it?” The moment you two stepped inside the living room, Sunghoon broke the tension between you two. 

You only turned around, a bored gaze staring at him but he remained unfazed. 

“Do you mean what you said earlier?” he asked, merely audible like he was embarrassed to ask you that.

For a moment you ponder. You wanted to tell him that it reminds you from the time that you two first met. Like the Sunghoon who you grew up with — but your mind stopped you. What for? If you told him that, it meant that he was right, he’s much better to be a keyboardist than a doctor. That means you accept his passion. 

“I wish you could’ve put that same energy in your studies,” so you told him that instead. A cold statement that your mind won’t stop reminding him. 

From there, you saw how the small hope in his eyes faded, followed by bitter laughter escaping from his lips. “Why did I even bother asking you again.”

He passes by you, like you’re nothing but a ghost, going straight to his room while you left there standing alone, guilt slowly growing in your heart. 

-

The second wedding of Wonyoung’s parents was extravagant just like what your best friend said. A small private reception was held at a banquet of a five-star hotel after their renewal at a small hall nearby. Flowers filled the white crystallized hall, something straight out of a royalty. You could only awe as you entered the place, arms clutched at Sunghoon who merely spoke throughout the day. 

“Sunghoon, y/n! Glad to see you two!” Mrs. Jang approached you two with a hug and kiss, you only smiled at the woman who’s like a mother to you. 

“Congratulations auntie, the vows were so sweet, I almost cried!” you said, making the woman laugh. 

“I bet you’ll write better vows than me,” she winks. “Both your parents have been talking about retirement and taking care of their grandkids from you two — gosh! You two are still young! I told them.” 

You only stifled a laugh to hide the awkwardness, Mrs. Jang only gave your arms a small squeeze, glancing at you and Sunghoon once again. “You two still have a long way to go, I hope you two won’t give up on each other.” 

You became quiet for a minute, but immediately, you gave her a smile before nodding. “Of course, thank you auntie.” 

Mrs. Jang excused herself to entertain other guests, so you took the opportunity to find your assigned seat where you and Sunghoon sat. Wonyoung was busying herself with the event organizer, you can see the stress on her face but she always lights up whenever she passes the two of you, promising you two that she’ll make it up to you two later.

It didn’t take too long for both of your parents to arrive. You and Sunghoon welcomed them with greetings and hugs, and it was obvious in their face that they were so happy to see you two together.

“Look at you two, you two are like a match made in heaven!” Mrs. Park compliments, you only chuckle at her words. 

“I can hear the wedding bells already! What do you think sweetie? Will this be a great reception for your wedding?” your mother suggested.

“Mom please, let’s not talk about that right now,” you awkwardly said. 

“It’s going to happen anyways,” your mother insisted. “But I do hope you two are doing well in your studies.”

“Of course, everything is going well auntie,” it was Sunghoon who answered, making you glance at him. Faking a smile to your mother who only pats his shoulders with glee.

“Well, that’s glad to hear,” your father answered. “I heard that you two will be attending Decelis Medical School. The passing rate is small there, I’m not scaring you two, just trying to remind you two.” 

“Dad, we’ll be fine, put trust in the two of us,” you assured. 

“Everyone’s expecting from the two of you,” Mr. Park added. “Families, friends, colleagues, everyone. They say there’s no couple who will have a better life than you two.”

Somehow, that only puts more weights on your shoulder. They’re still expecting, and you don’t know what to say to them, hence, you only put a fake smile as an awkward chuckle escapes your lips. 

“Of course,” Sunghoon answers casually like he wasn’t the one who’s actually ruining the whole engagement. “Can you excuse us for a moment? I would like to dance y/n.”

“Oh, such a sweetheart! Of course, you don’t need to tell us that,” Mrs. Park insisted. 

Sunghoon only glances at you, offering his right hand to you, which you only accepted. You knew that he didn’t actually want to dance with you, it’s just an excuse for you two to escape the conversations with both your parents before it gets worse. 

But it leads you two to an even more awkward atmosphere. Your head low as you ignore Sunghoon’s stare that has you melting like ice. Right hand clasps to each other while your other hand is on his shoulder, as his other hand is on your waist, holding you dearly as you two dance along with other couples on the circle.

It felt orchestrated, stiff like two robots forced to dance. You could only listen to the music as you follow Sunghoon’s steps. 

“You didn’t have to do this,” you said. 

“Rather have this than straight-up lie to our parents,” he said, which only made you bitterly laugh. 

“You don’t need to lie if you weren’t fucking around,” that’s when you look at him, trying to remove his hold when he tugs you closer. His eyes bore nothing but coldness, while yours was intense, filled with annoyance.

“Everyone’s watching us,” Sunghoon whispered. “You’re not going to make a mess aren’t you?”

“Why would I make a mess at someone’s wedding? That’ll be shameful Hoon,” you stated the obvious. “I’ll be surprised if you’re the one who’ll make a scene.” 

“Of course, you always think that I’ll do something like that,” he replied. 

“With all the bullshits and mess you’ve been doing lately, it doesn’t surprise me at all,” you gave him a knowing smile. His hold on you tightens, squeezing your hands and you’re convinced that a mark on your waist will bloom the following day. But you didn’t want to back down, your eyes remained at him as you two continued to dance. 

The song ended after what feels like an eternity. Immediately, you and Sunghoon stopped, making you remove his hold from you before giving him another bitter smile. 

“I need a drink, excuse me,” you said, leaving him standing there. 

You remained on the champagne section, lightly sipping the drink which you internally wince. You’re not used to alcoholic drinks but tonight feels like you needed it — maybe two or three, because you honestly don’t know what to do with your life.

The event, supposedly an event where everyone witnessed a renewal of love, made you sick rather than feel romantic. Everything’s suffocating, knowing that you’re the only one who knows about Sunghoon’s rebellion and you can’t do nothing about him while that asshole still managed to put up a show and spew lies to both your parents. 

On your fourth glass, the song suddenly changed into a bright, lively one. A disco song from the 80s that had people in gowns and tuxedos dance drunkenly. And yet, you remained in the corner, watching the crowd even seeing your parents were on the dance floor too, you stifled a laugh because they were probably reminiscing about their youth. 

From there, you caught a glimpse of them. You placed down the glass, stepping forward to see the two of them dancing. 

Sunghoon and Wonyoung. They weren’t not only dancing, but they were laughing too. You watch as the two of them dance, copying each other’s steps, synchronising as they sing along the song. You stood there, frozen. Your eyes never leave them, watching how Sunghoon twirled Wonyoung — like they’re in their own world.

Your fist turned round, nails digging on your palm as you tried to control yourself. Something about them brewed something in you. An unexplainable feeling that you don’t want to acknowledge. Watching them hold hands as they spun along to the music, while you remained nailed to a corner, your stomach wrenched into a weird feeling. — then it hit you. Everything makes sense now. 

That’s it. You didn’t think twice anymore. You went back to your table, grabbing the purse you brought and without looking back, you quietly exited the party. 

You found yourself inside the restroom, locking yourself inside as you tried to control your breathing. Closing your eyes, you tried to relax — but the scene earlier just keeps on replaying in your mind. Your hold on the sink tightens, almost scraping your nails against the marble texture. 

As much as you want to insist that you and Sunghoon are already arranged to marry each other, Sunghoon is far from being yours.

This has always been a marriage of convenience. You always remind that to yourself. Yet, there’s not a day where you wish that Sunghoon would see you differently. That you wish that he sees the reason why you’re doing everything for him. But from what you witnessed earlier, you realized that his heart beats for someone else.

All hopes lost. The signs are there. How can you let someone be married to you when he yearns for another? Everything you’ve done for him crumbled in an instant. Wasted and useless, because not only were your feelings devastated, but you also ruined your friendship with him. 

For the first time, you accept your own defeat. You stared at the mirror, seeing your reflection disgusted you. A spiraling feeling where as you stare at her, all you can see is a deceitful girl who was too selfish and prideful — wondering, if this is all Sunghoon can see in you.

With a heavy heart, you left the restroom, walking towards the empty hallway when someone called your name. You turned around to see him standing there. Your heart skipped a beat but it’s all because of the nervousness that you were feeling.

“Where did you go?” Sunghoon asked, approaching you but you walked away further, not until he grabbed you by your arms. 

“Let me go Sunghoon,” you coldly said, which made Sunghoon let go.

“What the fuck is wrong with you, I thought you’re not going to make a scene?” he sarcastically stated, making you roll your eyes, seeing that it’s just you and him in the hallway. 

“Says the guy who made a scene earlier,” you mocked.

It took a minute for Sunghoon to process what you said, eyebrows knitted as he looked at you with anger. “There’s nothing wrong with dancing with Wonyoung.”

You took a deep breath before facing him. “You like Wonyoung,”

There it is, the heavy feeling that you’ve been holding in ever since your best friend had returned. 

You can see it. You’re not dumb to not observe it. Still, it hurts as much as you want to avoid it, you couldn’t ignore the way Sunghoon’s eyes light up whenever he talks to Wonyoung. How his voice becomes soft and gentle — something that he has never done to you, and never will he.

Tonight was the final nail. As you watch them dance together, it's hard to ignore that something was sparkling between the two of them, and you hate that the truth is there is. They would make such a better couple, a healthier couple if you must say. 

“What the fuck are you talking about?” Sunghoon asked, appalled. 

“You can’t fool me Sunghoon, you like Wonyoung, I can see the way you look at her, like she’s everything to you,” you explained, and every word bites you, hurting you slowly like a venom trailing on your blood. 

“I don’t like her,” Sunghoon confessed, and yet, he only stares at you deadpan. “But if I had the choice, I’ll marry her instead.” 

For a moment you were quiet, then, a bitter laugh escaped your lips because the statement hurts more than Sunghoon actually having feelings for your best friend. “You really hate me, don’t you?”

“Hate is such a deep word y/n, I don’t hate you, we are just too different,” Sunghoon explained. 

“I guess you and Wonyoung are much more similar to each other then,” you mocked. 

“She supports my passion. She understands where I am coming from,” Sunghoon pointed out. “Something you never attempt to do.” 

You only let out a deep sigh before staring at him one last time. You can feel it, the thumping beat of your heart, the short clasps of your breathing as you could only grasp on your hand tightly.

“If that’s the case Sunghoon, let's just end this engagement, nothing good will come out of this.”

Sunghoon looks at you confused, surprised that those words came out of your mouth. “What —”

“Hoon, I give up.” you confessed. “I am done cleaning up your mess, convincing you to focus on becoming a doctor while you go around playing in the band, getting drunk, and here you are, blatantly lying to your parents, acting like everything’s normal.” 

“And who asked you to do that for me? No one, right? Admit it y/n, you’re just scared because the perfect life that you’ve planned was gone.” Sunghoon pointed out.

“You’re right Sunghoon, that’s why let’s stop this engagement. I don’t want to be married to a guy like you, and clearly you don’t want to marry me either.” 

Sunghoon gives you a mocking smile. “A guy like me? Like I didn’t know your feelings for me, y/n,”

“The Sunghoon that I loved was the one who was diligent, dedicated, and nice. The one who was excited to study in Decelis to become a doctor. The one who makes me smile and cares for me. Not the drunkard asshole who’s chasing after a dream because suddenly, your life revolves around playing in the band.” you confessed, glaring at him one last time before walking away.

But it didn’t take Sunghoon a minute to reach after you, grabbing your arms and pulling you closer.

“You really think you can walk away from all of this?” Sunghoon demanded, which made you scoff. 

“What is your problem!? Shouldn’t you be happy? You’re free now!” you shouted, pushing him on his chest, making him step backward and letting you go. That’s when you felt your body weakening, you could only hold on your knees as you felt something wet streaming down your eyes. You softly tap your eyes, not noticing how fast the tears streamed down your face. 

This is the probably the first time you cried. You never cried when you fell from your bicycle. You never cried when you went second place on the honor’s list. You never cried when your parents lecture you. Crying is a sign of weakness for you and you know yourself, that you’re not weak. 

You wanted to curse everything but only a mocking laugh was all you could do. You hated yourself for being vulnerable for a split second — that you cried because of Sunghoon. Of all the reasons that made you cry, it really has to be him. 

That’s when you stood up, glancing at Sunghoon whose eyes widened to see your watery eyes. He tries to approach you but you only look away. That’s when you turned around, running towards the exit and leaving Sunghoon there frozen. 

As soon as you reached your place, you went straight to your room and locked it. You leaned against the door as you deeply exhaled — but that’s where the first outburst came. You dropped to your knees, hands covering your face as you continued to wail. It goes on for so long until your breathing becomes slow, hiccups accompanying every sob that you leave your mouth. 

You don’t feel anything but pain. It hurts. Everything just fucking hurts you. Watching Sunghoon be happy with someone else. Knowing the fact that he doesn’t want to marry you, and the dream of your perfect life was shattered in just a blink of the night. 

Everything that you planned is now nowhere to be found. You hated that it all led to this mess, blaming yourself because maybe, there’s some ways where you could’ve prevented it. Maybe you shouldn’t have given up, this may be just a moment of weakness but hearing those words from Sunghoon, tells you that there’s no hope for everything to be fixed.

Now that everything is done, you could only grab your phone, and as you open it. Your mother’s caller id jumped on the screen. You stared at it for a good minute, but the thought of your mother being disappointed that you and Sunghoon fought, worse, you broke off the engagement scared you. 

So you blocked her number and quickly dialled a number. 

“Y/n? Hello?” Yizhuo’s sleepy voice answered. 

“I’m sorry Ning but I need to crash into your place —”

“What, why? What happen —”

“I broke it off with Sunghoon.” you said, biting your lips to prevent the tears from falling again.

“What the fuck y/n!? Grabbing my keys right now, stay right there and I’m speeding to your place, give me ten minutes!” Yizhuo shouts. 

The call hung-up immediately, which was your sign. You grabbed all the important stuff that you need. Your books, notes, a few clothes and a few toiletries that’ll last you. You still have a few months left before the semester ends, all you need to do is focus on your studies — if you fail to have a perfect marriage, you’re not letting your dream of becoming a doctor slip away too. 

Dragging the luggage with you, you hear the car horn and as you step outside, you see the familiar white car Yizhuo owns. 

“Let’s get the hell out of here,” Yizhuo said, grabbing your luggage and placing it on the back seat. You only sit in the passenger seat as you wait for your friend to enter the driver’s seat. 

“You okay?” Yizhuo asked, gently patting your shoulder. 

Tears started streaming down your face, you could only sob as your best friend pulled you for a hug.

“He’s not worth it y/n, you deserve someone better,” Yizhuo insisted as she broke out from the hug. “I know it’s hard for you because you love him, but are you really going to settle for less? If he truly cares for you, he’ll understand your side despite disliking the idea but he didn’t.”

You could only nod at her words, “I know, I give up Ning. I’m tired, he said he doesn’t want to marry me, so everything is useless.” 

“He’s going to regret letting you go,” Yizhuo swore, starting the engine before patting your shoulder once again. “You can stay in my apartment as long as you want, don’t worry about anything, I got you in this one,” Yizhuo only smiled as you drove away from the place, and as you glanced at the rearview mirror, there it was — Sunghoon’s car. 

You don’t know if he saw you leaving the place, but as you felt your phone vibrating and saw his name on your screen, you only closed your phone and glanced at the window of the car, staring at the places that you pass by, thinking that what you did was for your own good too. 

-

Days after the party, you returned to Decelis University acting like everything’s normal.

You still did your routine, minimizing some tasks since you’re living under Yizhuo’s place and you don’t want to intrude furthermore. You had plans on renting a place on your own but it’ll be a few months until your semester break. This temporary housing of yours is better than enduring living with Sunghoon.

You still don’t know how to approach your parents with the situation, afraid that it might disappoint them, though your reason wherein it’s not your fault at all is strong, you’re still scared because you just ruin everything they have planned for you. 

You only sent a short message to your father that you need time to think, before blocking his phone number too. You know that a lecture will await you, but for now, all you want is space from them. You wanted to focus on your goal without their expectations heaving on your back.

You continued going to your class. Preparations for the Decelis medical school entrance exam are near, and you’re multitasking your time doing your studies and reviewing for the exam. Despite the heavy pressure it had instilled, everything felt light for you, you felt your shoulders becoming lighter and your worries seemed to be fading day by day — perhaps it’s because you’re not worrying about Sunghoon anymore.

Sunghoon on the other hand, you don’t have any news about him. He doesn’t go to your classes either. It looks like he had made up his mind about his life, and whatever he does, you could only wish him good luck. 

As you exit the department building, you hear a familiar voice calling out your name, turning around, your eyes immediately widened at the figure. 

“Wonyoung, what are you doing here?” you asked, approaching your best friend who’s sitting on the gazebo in front of your department building. 

“I’m sorry,” she started. “I’m sorry for ruining what you and Sunghoon had, but listen to me y/n, I don’t like Sunghoon, I treat him like a brother the same way I treat you like a sister. What he said to you was so fucking stupid.” 

“You knew?” you asked, surprised.

“I went to your house the next day but Sunghoon’s the only one there. Everyone was worried y/n! They thought you two eloped, you disappeared without saying any word that night, plus you blocked auntie’s phone number.” Wonyoung explained. 

“I’m sorry, I just — I needed space, my mind’s all over the place, but Wonyoung, I’m not mad at you, it’s not your fault anyway.” 

“Sunghoon told me you broke off the engagement,” Wonyoung said. “Is it because of what he said?”

“He made it clear that he doesn’t want to marry me, so what’s the use Won?”

“You’re giving up now?” she asked. “You used to be persistent, y/n what happened?”

“Even I get tired sometimes, Won. Sunghoon…he’s a hopeless case. No matter how hard I tried to help him, he just didn't want my help.” 

“He’s a mess right now, you know that?” Wonyoung stated. “He’s been looking for you.” 

You halted because of Wonyoung’s words, but quickly, you threw her a bitter smile. “He has always been a mess Won,” you replied. “I’m just tired of picking up after him.” 

Wonyoung merely nods, giving you a pitied smile as she brushes your hair, “I understand where you’re coming from y/n, I know it was also hard for you to decide to break the engagement.”

“Hopefully, it’ll pass,” you said softly. “You’re still going to be my maid of honor no matter who I’m going to marry.” 

That made Wonyoung chuckle, which made you laugh, you hugged her once again and as you felt her arms wrapping around you, you felt relief.

You never wanted jealousy to corrupt your mind, but sometimes you couldn’t help but be insecure at how Wonyoung and Sunghoon’s relationship remained the same while him and yours disappeared in a glimpse. You know that Wonyoung’s not at fault in this one, everything was just a matter of fallout. 

“Since you’re here already, why don’t we go out for dinner? Oh, I’ll introduce you to Ning! You’ll love her!” you suggested, immediately changing the topic.

“I’ve been dying to meet her!” Wonyoung replied, immediately tugging you so that you two can meet your other friend. 

Turns out Wonyoung and Yizhuo are a two deadly duo. You were half-regretting introducing them to each other because now, they were insisting on going out for the night. 

“Come on now, you don’t have any class for tomorrow and you should relieve your stress,” Yizhuo insisted. 

“Really y/n? You’re going to graduate college without experiencing going out with your friends and partying? It’s a good thing I’m here because I am not taking a no for an answer,” Wonyoung added.

You only roll your eyes, “you know that clubs aren’t my thing.”

“That’s because you never experienced it! Come on now, you should loosen yourself up just for one night,”  Yizhuo explained. “Please, you said you need space right? Why not relax? Just for tonight, forget about your parents, their expectations, and your studies. We’ll make it worth it.” 

You only stared at the two of them, both with pleading eyes as they clasp their hands together. Another roll in your eyes was made but there’s a small smile on your face. “Fine, if I passed-out drunk, you guys take care of me.” 

Both squealed in agreement, excited as Wonyoung fished out her phone to make a reservation at a famous club in the city center, while Yizhuo immediately dragged you towards the parking lot where her car is parked, excited to go home so that you can change into something daring (she said) and party all night.

The club was full by the time the three of you arrived, Wonyoung strutted on the small walkway, excusing the strangers as she held your hand while Yizhuo’s behind you, guiding your way towards your table.

A small table for three was reserved for you, a bottle of tequila with lemon and salt was arranged neatly there. As soon as you three reached the place, you immediately sat on the couch while Yizhuo opened the bottle. 

“I hope you know how to take a shot,��� she teasingly said as she poured the shot glass full. 

“I know how to, you’re making me like I’m such a nerd that doesn’t go out of her house,” you insisted.

“She drinks, she just doesn’t like going out to clubs,” Wonyoung whispered to Yizhuo who glanced at you while you boredly raised an eyebrow.

“Well, we’re going to change that, cheers!” Yizhuo shouts, raising the glass which you and Wonyoung copied. The first shot of tequila went straight down on your throat, leaving a burning feeling downwards your chest which made you sneer for a second. 

Shot after shot, you lost count the amount of times the three of you took a shot, the tequila bottle is almost half. Your mind has become hazy, spinning but you can manage it. All you can hear is the loud music coming from the speakers, the dj playing Taylor Swift’s songs which was so fucking random and yet, you didn’t care. You were singing your lungs out along with Wonyoung and Yizhuo who are also tipsy. 

“Let’s hit the dance floor!” Yizhuo suggested when the song changed to some edm music, the three of you squeezed yourself on the dance floor, dancing and singing along as you bumped onto a few people, giving them smiles and small apologies while never stopping dancing. 

You never felt more alive. You didn’t care what would happen tomorrow, all you cared about was that you’re having fun with the two girls that treat you like your sister. They were right, this is what you need and you’re just so happy that you agreed to go out with them. 

That’s why you pulled them closer together, “I love you guys!” you shouted, which only made them laugh.

“Oh my gosh, she’s the emotional type of drunk,” Yizhuo giggled. 

“She only says that when she’s drunk, so savor it,” Wonyoung replied, hugging you back. “I love you too!” making the three of you squeal together before breaking out to continue dancing. 

You only let your body sway along with the music, not noticing a hand wrapping around your waist and as you turn around, you see a guy your age, smiling at you as he hands you his shot glass. 

“No thank you,” you smiled, “I already have one.” 

But he only laughed, “there’s no harm in having another one.”

You only let out a small giggle as you shrug, taking the shot and drinking it straight. You can hear his cheer, along with some guys that you’re unfamiliar with. You failed to notice Yizhuo and Wonyoung whereabouts as you continued to dance with the stranger. 

“You come here often?” he asked, and you only shook your head. 

“It’s too crowded here!” you shouted back. The place was getting hotter, crowds becoming bigger as the guy’s body became way too close to you. 

“Crowded huh? Do you want to go somewhere less crowded?” 

Maybe it was the alcohol — you don’t know, your head’s spinning and everything has become blurry to you, but all you can remember was that you nod at his answer. “Okay! I’m just going to tell my friends I’m leaving.”

“Alright sweetheart.” he smirked, his hold from your waist loosened. 

You tried to find your friends, but your mind is spinning — you couldn’t even remember where your table was. Your head searched sideways, when you felt a tug on your arm, making you turn around.

“She’s not going with you,” Sunghoon said with a cold tone.

“Dude fuck off, go pick some other girls around here,” the stranger tried to pull you away but Sunghoon was fast, immediately backing you behind him. 

“She’s my fiance, if you don’t want any trouble, get lost,” Sunghoon warns. 

“Fuck off Sunghoon,” you rebutted, shaking your grip away from Sunghoon who was surprised by your action. “We’re through, remember?” 

The stranger chuckled, “she doesn’t even want you here, so fuck off, will ya?”

But it didn’t take a split second for Sunghoon to hit  him on the face. His fist landing directly on the nose which made the stranger stumble down. 

Everyone was surprised when the guy fell on the ground, immediately stepping out from the fight. Sunghoon attempted to give the guy another punch but Heeseung and Jay managed to grab him. You didn’t process everything until you felt Wonyoung and Yunjin were behind you. 

“What happened — Sunghoon!” Wonyoung shrieks. The stranger stood up from the ground, but Sunghoon was quick to get away from his friend and charge towards him, landing another punch, and if it wasn’t enough, he landed another, this time harder. 

It didn’t take a minute for the bouncers to enter the scene, separating the two of them. You weren’t able to understand anything, all you know was that your friends pulled you out of the club along with Sunghoon and his friends. 

“Dude calm down,” Heeseung said trying to keep his friend still but Sunghoon pulled away, almost jabbing his friend who only stepped back with hands raised. 

“How can I fucking calm down when y/n almost got in danger tonight!?” he pointed out.

“You almost killed someone!” Jay shouted, trying to get a grip on Sunghoon but he got pushed away too. 

“He should be lucky because I hold back a little bit,” Sunghoon sarcastically laughs. “He deserves it, the way he looked at y/n? I know he has bad intentions.” 

“Stop caring Sunghoon!” you shouted, senses finally hitting you. “So what if I’ll go with that guy? We’re done, remember? I can meet whoever I like.” 

“I don’t care if we’re through, you couldn’t even take care of yourself. What the fuck are you even doing at a club?” Sunghoon lectured.

That’s when you scoff, “just because you can have fun, doesn’t me I can.”

“Oh, so that’s your idea of fun? Getting drugged by a stranger and who knows what they’ll do to you — fucking careless,” Sunghoon lets out a deep sigh, his anger heightening as he glared at Wonyoung. 

“If it wasn’t for me, she would’ve been in danger tonight, what the hell Won!?” Sunghoon angrily lectures. 

“Sunghoon stop blaming us, we were there and we were just letting y/n have fun, we’re not that stupid to let her go with that guy. You just really have to interfere first,” Wonyoung explained, forehead creased with anger.

Sunghoon could only roll his eyes, groaning as he frustratedly brushed his hair. “This is fucking stupid, you three aren’t even safe there!” 

“Just go home Sunghoon,” you shouted once again, making him glance at you. “You’re ruining our night for fuck’s sake.”

But in a split second, Sunghoon pulls you away from Yizhuo, and before you could say another thing, he grabs you by your knees and swings you on his shoulders, your upper body bumping on his back. 

“Sunghoon! Put me down!” you shouted, punching his back but Sunghoon remained unfazed, he then glanced at his friends who were surprised by his action.

“No one follows, this is between the two of us,” Sunghoon warned before he walked towards his car. 

You tried to struggle your way out of his hold, but Sunghoon’s too strong for you. He managed to put you in the passenger seat, even putting on the belt on you. 

“Sunghoon —” 

“Stop struggling y/n, we’ll go home now.” 

“Sunghoon, what fuck is wrong with you? We’re done, how many times do I have to tell you that!?” you shouted at him. “You’re suffocating me.”

“And so do I with you, but we can’t always have what we want.” Sunghoon stated, slamming the door of the car. You weren’t able to say another word, not knowing what he meant by that.

The drive towards your place was quiet yet tense, you could only close your eyes as the throbbing feeling in your head started to become worse. You had too many to drink but all you know that what the guy gave you was just a normal shot. If it would’ve been drugged, then you should’ve been passed-out by now. 

As Sunghoon parked the car inside, you could only stare at the entrance of the house. You do miss your house but there’s a deep feeling of pain lingering in your heart as it reminds you of Sunghoon. You didn’t even notice that Sunghoon had opened the door for you, and you mindlessly left the car. 

Entering the living room, you only stood there as you stare at the place — Sunghoon had maintained it clean even though you left, surprising you since you spent your mornings cleaning the house. 

You can hear the door closing, softly Sunghoon’s footsteps approach you but he stops midway. That’s when you realized how suffocating the emptiness the house had. 

“What is this Sunghoon?” you immediately asked, not even bothering looking at him.

“I just took you home,” Sunghoon simply said and you wanted to laugh. Home. you knew that home meant a lively house with a loving family, not a tense one with a broken engagement. 

“Sunghoon, since it still hasn’t sunk in your mind, our engagement is done, isn’t that what you want?” you repeated. 

“Well, did you even tell that to your parents?” Sunghoon asked casually. “My parents don’t know it yet.” 

You didn’t answer and Sunghoon immediately knew. 

“Of course you haven’t,” he teased. “That technically means we’re still engaged to each other.” 

You only closed your eyes, trying to compose yourself as you felt conflicted. “I don’t understand you Sunghoon, what do you even want? You made it very clear back then that you’d prefer to marry Wonyoung instead of me. Why bring me here again!?”

“I don’t know,” Sunghoon confessed. “It’s just…it’s so lonely here.” 

“I’m not a doll that you can keep,” you heaved. 

“I miss you.” he breathes, and your eyes widen but you could only let out a bitter laugh. 

“Suddenly you miss me? Sunghoon the last time you told me, you don’t want to marry me. Shouldn’t you be happy that we’re done.”

“That doesn’t equate to the fact that I don’t want to call off the engagement,” he stated. 

“You’re confusing me Sunghoon, stand your ground, you don’t want to marry me but you don’t want the engagement to be broken? What do you even want?”

“I was hoping that your mind might change,” Sunghoon said, almost pleading. “That somewhere in you, there’s that girl who first recognized my talent.” 

Silence. You weren’t able to say another word. Slowly, you turned around to see him standing there. His gaze at you gentle and pleading, far different from the looks he gave to you. 

“Do you remember the first time we met?” Sunghoon told you. “Do you remember what you told me?”

Of course. “You have a talent for playing the piano!” you recalled. It was the first thing you said when both your parents introduced you to Sunghoon. It didn’t sinked into you that those words of your younger self would stick in Sunghoon’s mind. 

“When I first joined the band, I thought you’ll be supportive because you’re the first one to recognize my love for playing the piano, but nothing,” Sunghoon chuckles bitterly. “I was hoping that someday, you would understand why I am chasing after my passion. That’s why I was so happy that you watched our performance that night — but you’re too stuck in that dream of yours to recognize it.” 

“It’s not just a dream Hoon, it's what's expected from me, and being a doctor, that’s what’s also expected from you.”

“Have you ever thought of what you want? Are you just going to wake up everyday, listen to your parents’ expectations and follow it? Do you have any idea how sad that is?” 

“I’m my parents’ only daughter, who else is going to make them proud aside from me?” you bitterly said. “And I want this too Hoon, so I’m sorry if my dream isn’t in the form of a passion unlike yours.”

“You’re not going to change your mind aren’t you?” Sunghoon mumbled. “I only pursued my passion and suddenly I’m not fit for your life anymore?” 

“It’s not just about having a perfect life, Hoon. My parents wanted me to marry a doctor, and I’m not going to push you anymore when it’s obvious that your heart beats for your passion.” you explained. 

“What about your heart then? What does your heart yearn for? You’re not going to fight for me anymore?” he said, almost pleading. A desperate turn in his tone shifted in you. 

“I’m done fighting for you Hoon,” you bitterly smiled. “Why are you suddenly asking me all of this?”

“You’re done with me? That’s it?” 

“Sunghoon, I’m really, really tired with everything.” you pleaded. “We’re just going to hurt each other the more we stay in this engagement.”

Sunghoon only stared at you. For a moment, he wanted to rebut your words. He wanted for you to fight furthermore because he knows you. You’re hard-headed, you’re not the type that won’t give up easily. But as he looks in your eyes, all he can is your desperation, eyes that scream for him that you’re tired of everything. 

“You’re really tired aren’t you?” he asked once again. 

“Just let me go Hoon, please.” you whispered. 

“Fine,” he said, defeated. “Only if you stay for the night.”

“What?” you asked, his request was sudden.

“Stay for the night, for me,” he said, almost pleading. “After this, I won’t disturb you anymore. Please, just stay for tonight.” 

It didn’t sink in everything he said, you could only stare at him, eyes wide as you can see how his eyes were almost begging for you. 

“I just…miss you so much,” he whispered. “But after this, we’re done. I’m going to tell my parents that we’re breaking off the engagement.” 

“Okay,” you said in defeat, and Sunghoon could only nod. He grabs your hand and you let him do so.

You found yourself in his room. The silence was engulfing, you stood there clueless as Sunghoon opened his closet, grabbing a shirt and pajamas for you — like you didn’t have any clothes left in your room next door. But you let it be, grabbing the clothes and going towards his bedroom’s bathroom. 

You can feel your heart beating fast. You were nervous, you don’t know what to do since this is the first time you and Sunghoon will sleep together. Sure, you had sleepovers back when you were kids, but those were the three of you. This one is just going to be the two of you, alone, in one bed.

But that’s his only request, when tomorrow comes, everything will be over now. It’s not like you two are going to do something, Sunghoon only wishes for you to stay for the night.

As you entered the room, you saw Sunghoon sitting on the edge of his bed, already in his sleeping clothes. He only stretched out his hands which you accepted and softly, he pulled you to his bed. 

“Let’s go to sleep?” he asked, almost inaudible. You only nod at his request and with that, the two of you settled underneath the blankets. You couldn’t even move, you had your back against Sunghoon and you wondered if he’s already asleep or not. 

It was as if he had read your mind, you felt Sunghoon shifted from his place — and in a second, warm arms wrapped around you and pulled you closer. Your breath halted as his hug tightened, your back almost resting on his chest, like he’s never wanting to let you go. It left you even more confused than ever, you two were never this intimate, and this will probably be the last time you two will be. 

“Goodnight y/n,” he whispered, and you can feel his lips touching the top of your head. 

Goodnight Sunghoon. You said in your mind.

“I’m sorry for everything.” Sunghoon mumbled, barely audible. 

You only closed your eyes, taking a long deep breath to hold yourself from crying. You wondered why he suddenly apologized. Why now? When everything is bound to be over. But you didn’t say a word, you tried to sleep instead, knowing that there’s no will inside you left to fight for yourself and Sunghoon. 

Goodbye Sunghoon.

-

The first semester has ended. The weather has become cold as fall passes by. Decelis University has slowly become empty with students going home to their hometown. 

The remaining months of your semester became a blur to you. You passed all your courses with ease and you managed to receive an academic honor for it. Emails from medical school offers had been appearing in your emails too, which meant that you’re secured to attend med school after graduation. Everything has been good to you — you got everything you need.

When you returned to your hometown, your parents spared you. They told you that they understand why you did it, letting it pass since you didn’t abandon your studies at all. They learned from Sunghoon’s parents that the engagement was called off. They didn’t ask you furthermore about it, and you could do nothing but to apologize not only to your parents but also to the Park family. Disappointment runs through your mind, especially when Sunghoon’s parents trusted you with their son — only for you to fail them.

A knock on the door disturbed your day, as you turned around you saw your parents entering your room. 

“Still studying dear? You’re doing too much now y/n,” your mom softly said, sitting on the edge of the bed along with your father. 

But you only smile, “I want to make sure that I’ll be able to pass Decelis’ entrance exam for medical school, you told me that the passing rate there is small.”

“Yes I know that sweetie but you’re doing too much, why don’t you do something else aside from studying?” your father suggested. 

But you only let out a laugh, “I'm all good dad, thanks for the concern though.”

“Have you ever thought of doing something else y/n? Something that you love?” your mom asked. That’s when you dropped your book, glancing at the two of them.

“Love?” 

“A hobby, what about tennis? You’re great at that sport, maybe you can be an athlete,” your mom happily said. 

“Oh, I do remember that you used to do ballet, I think you still have the skills sweetie,” your father added, which left you confused but chuckling. 

“Mom, dad, what is this all about?” you asked. Silence hovered in the room for a minute, both your parents looked at each other, trying to signal each other who should talk, which left your mother sighing. 

“Maybe, we shouldn’t have pushed you too hard to become a doctor,” your mother pointed out. “And it’s okay for us if you don’t want —”

“I want to become a doctor mom, that has always been my dream,” you rebutted, shifting your focus on your book. “I’m okay, don’t worry about me.”

“We had a talk with Sunghoon’s parents,” that’s when you stopped, glancing at them once again. “They explained why you two called it off.”

“Okay,” you shortly replied. You remember that night where you and Sunghoon slept together. His apology still lingers in your mind. There’s a part of you that wanted to know what he was sorry for. 

But the more you stay there, the more the pain deepens in your heart. You slipped away from his hold the next morning, and starting that day, you never heard anything from Sunghoon. 

He didn’t show up to any of his classes. He just disappeared like a bubble. Wonyoung told you that he doesn’t reply to her texts either. You don’t know if he continued performing in Arcanum, or did he ghost his band members. It’s funny how even though you two are already over, you still have a bit of concern for him. 

“Sweetie, we understand Sunghoon. He chose his dream and maybe it was a little disappointing for you because you always dream that you and Sunghoon will become doctors together, but there will come a point where your dream will change.” your father explained. “Sunghoon just so happens to rekindle his passion for music, it happens.” 

“And there’s nothing I can do about it,” you told them. “That’s why there’s no reason for the engagement to continue.”

“We shouldn’t have pressured you to become a doctor,” your mother insisted. “We were wrong in that part, and we’re very sorry about it dear.”

“Mom, even if you don’t pressure me, I still want to become a doctor no matter what, I will follow your footsteps, so don’t be sorry about it.”

“It’s not just about becoming a doctor,” your father pointed out. “It’s about your engagement with Sunghoon, we shouldn’t have done that.”

“It’s already over, so you shouldn’t worry about it.”

“Listen y/n, when we set you and Sunghoon to marry, it’s not for our business to emerge. We just knew that you two love each other.” your father explained, hand resting on your knees. The old man faintly smiles at you. “You two were too young to understand it, but it was also our fault for putting so much expectations on the two of you — we should’ve let you two navigate your feelings on your own.” 

“But you said, I should marry a doctor,” you pointed out. “I always knew that it’s going to be Sunghoon, but he changed dad. If he can’t be the one, I’ll just find someone in med school.”

“Oh sweetie, we’re terribly sorry for saying that,” that’s when your mother pulls you to a hug. “But we still want you to marry for love, and dear, it’s not always about his profession, but how he’s going to treat you as your husband.”

“Why now? Why say that to me all of the sudden?” you questioned, breaking out from your mother’s touch.

“We didn’t think it’ll come to this point —”

“No, because from the very start you two insisted that I should marry a doctor because that’s what you two wanted for me! I was lucky that Sunghoon wanted to become a doctor but when he changed his dreams, I did everything just for him to go back!” you shouted.

Both your parents were surprised to hear your voice raise. You stood there, shaking as tears started to flow from your eyes once again.

“I did everything in my life just to please your expectations because I know that you two always know what’s best for me, and I didn’t want to fail you guys. But now, I feel so stupid because suddenly, I have the freedom to choose what I want,” a bitter laugh escapes your mouth, you brushed your hair as you bit your lips. Trying to stop the tears from falling.

“I even roped Sunghoon in my dreams because that’s what you guys want for me, and I was scared of disappointing you two if he didn’t become a doctor — you could’ve told me from the start! Then maybe, I could’ve supported Sunghoon instead of suffocating him.” 

Your parents remained quiet. Sitting there as they watch their daughter cry. Both of them were surprised, never thinking they’ll see you cry. You have always been a strong girl for them, but then again, everyone crumbles. 

“We can still fix it dear,” your mother insisted. 

“It’s too late now mom,” you answered. “It’s not just about the engagement, Sunghoon and I, we’re done with everything. We spent our lives living up to your expectations, and this is the only time we made a choice for ourselves.”

Before they could say anything. You scurried to grab your phone and jacket, storming out of your room as your parents couldn’t do anything but watch you disappear from their sight. 

You found yourself at the small playground near your house. Sitting on the end of the slide as you hiccup your cries.

You hate your parents and how their mind suddenly changed in a glimpse. Marry for love? Love was never the problem for you, it was the fact that they spent your whole life shaping you into an ideal life only for them to take it back. You’ll marry for love in a heartbeat but it never crossed your mind because their expectations came first. 

If only. You could only think of the what-ifs because somehow, you spent your whole life making your parents proud — that you couldn’t even make a choice on your own. “Do you have any idea how sad that is?” you remember Sunghoon’s words to you, making you close your eyes as tears continued to flow along with your soft sobs.

Sunghoon’s right. All your life you did your best to follow your parents’ footsteps, never tried to navigate other hobbies or passions — perhaps that’s why you weren’t able to understand Sunghoon’s dreams at all. You suddenly felt lost, not knowing what to do with your life anymore. Sunghoon and Wonyoung, they’ll be choosing the things they love.

What about you? You don’t know anymore, you don’t even know if becoming a doctor is what you want — or it’s just something that has been engraved to you by your parents that you learned to love it somehow. 

“y/n?” You looked up and to your surprise, Sunghoon’s mother was standing in front of you. 

“Auntie,” you quickly stood up and wiped the tears away. “What brings you here?”

“I was supposed to visit you today,” she said with a soft tone. “But I caught you here on the way, is there something wrong?” 

You immediately fake a smile, even though your nose was runny and eyes are puffy red, you tried your best to assure the woman that you’re okay. But she simply shakes her head before patting your head. 

“Come on, let’s have a talk.”

You two ended up in a small coffee shop nearby. You watch as Mrs. Park lightly sips on her tea, before glancing at you. She then smiles, and you can see where Sunghoon got his eye smile, and somehow, that comforts you. 

“When Sunghoon told us that he wanted to play for a band instead, we were disappointed,” Mrs. Park explained. “His dad was furious, but what else can we do? Stop him from doing what he loves?”

You only remained quiet, listening to Mrs. Park as she softly chuckled. “As parents, we only want what’s best for our children, but it’s still up to them to choose their future. For Sunghoon, we let him be, it’s what he wants.”

Then, she glances at you. “You know, Sunghoon broke the engagement because he doesn’t want to hurt you anymore?”

“I’m sorry I gave up on him.” you apologized immediately. “We — we’re just too different auntie.”

“Well, opposites do attract my dear,” she jokingly said, making you let out a small chuckle. From there, her expression softens. Looking at you pitifully, the woman can see the stress you went through and it breaks her heart, knowing that they were the reasons why you’re like that. 

“You’ve done a lot for my son y/n, and I am thankful for that,” Mrs. Park smiles. “You’ll be a great wife for him, someone who’ll come to knock his senses but — everyone gets tired sometimes.” 

You only smile at her, but Mrs. Park’s eyes glistened with a meaningful smile on her lips. “That’s why it’s important to rest, everything is not the end just because you were tired.” 

You became quiet because of her words. Mrs. Park stretches her hand, holding your hand as she squeezed it lightly. “Just rest dear, take your time for yourself, everything is not too late.”

“But —”

“Listen to your heart this time dear, only your heart knows what’s truly best for you.”

-

You returned to your shared house a week before the next semester started. 

The moment you opened the door, you were welcomed by its hollow silence, making you bitterly smile because you do miss the silence — and you’ll miss it more now that it won’t be the place you’ll go home to.

Slowly, you opened your room and noticed that it was the same as how you left it the night you ran away. Sunghoon didn’t touch any of it, and you were glad that he didn’t. You didn’t waste any time, you grabbed the luggage that you brought with you, packing all the things that you have in your room. 

You spent the day packing your things. Neatly folding everything, and stacking it inside your storage box. You managed to finish it before sunset, going back and forth to load it inside your car. And with one last glance in the empty room, you could only mutter goodbye as you dragged your luggage with you. 

But as soon as you reach the living room, you hear the doorknob unlocking, making you stop. You can feel your heart starting to beat fast, praying that it won’t be him. 

“Y/n?” you saw how Sunghoon’s eyes widened as he saw you, but his eyes immediately darted at the luggage that you were holding. 

You only took a deep breath before giving him a smile, “I just came by to grab my things.” 

“Wait, wait — why?” Sunghoon hurriedly went towards you, hands grabbing your arm. 

“Our engagement’s over Sunghoon, so there’s no need for us to be together,” you gritted your teeth. Every word felt like a knife stabbing inside you. 

“Y/n, can you just listen to me —”

“Sunghoon stop, there’s nothing for us to talk about.” 

“You know that everything’s not too late right? We can still fix it.”

“What’s to fix Sunghoon?” you asked. “I thought we made it clear that we’re done.”

“If you’re done fighting for me, then I’m fighting for you now,” Sunghoon insisted, grabbing you by your shoulders. You tried to get out of his hold but he tightens his hold on you. 

“Why now Hoon? Where were you, when I was fighting for everything? You can’t just enter my life and expect me to accept you immediately —”

“I love you okay!?” he shouted, completely shutting you off. Eyes wide from the sudden confession. 

Sunghoon looks at you, his eyes stressed and dark, yet it screams for your plea. “I’m sorry that I realized my feelings just now, I know I was late but it’s never too late for us, just listen to me —”

“Hoon stop —”

“Y/n, just for once why don’t you listen to your heart?” Sunghoon stated. “You know deep inside, that it’s not too late for us to fix it. Your parents, my parents, they know that it’s not too late, it’s only you who doesn’t want to —"

“Because I’m scared, Hoon!” you shouted, shutting Sunghoon off. 

“I don’t know what to do with my life anymore Hoon and that fucking scares me. Suddenly I have my own freedom and I don’t know whether my decisions will be right or wrong. If I end up choosing what my heart wants, I might just ended up failing myself”

“You know you don’t always need to be perfect right?” Sunghoon whispered to you. “People make mistakes y/n, we’re flawed, and there’s nothing wrong with making mistakes.”

You only shake your head. “I don’t know Hoon, I don’t know what I should do anymore.”

“Just listen to your heart,” The hold on your shoulders tightens. “Go for the things you love, not because it’s what your parents taught you, or because it’s what’s for the best. You know this y/n, what do you want?” 

You. You thought. In a heartbeat, it has always been Sunghoon. Despite all the mess, the rough paths, and fights you two had. In the end, your heart beats for him. 

And as you look at him, there were no longer cold gaze and emptiness in his eyes, his eyes yearn for you too. The years of your unrequited love for him are over now.

“It’s you Hoon,” you mumbled, a bite on your lips as you started stuttering. “I’m just afraid after everything that happened to us.”

“We can work it out, we may have started on a rough path but I know that we can make it through.” he deeply sighs. “I’m sorry for everything, I know I said some harsh words but I was angry at that time, I’m sorry y/n, I was just frustrated but I didn’t mean every word that I said, it has always been you,”

You only stared at him, “how can I trust you Sunghoon?”

“Let me make it up to you y/n,” he swore, hands finding its way to your face. “If you let me, I’ll prove it to you.”

“How? How can I be so sure about you?”

“We’ll start again y/n, don’t worry about us, we’ll navigate this together, I won’t hurt you anymore.” Sunghoon promised. “Just be with me okay? You’ll be there for me right?” 

You only stared at Sunghoon. He has his lips tightly sealed, his eyes were searching for yours, the same eyes that yearned for you that night. Your heart started beating faster, and you weren’t able to process that tears are starting to fall from your eyes. Your mind was telling you to run away again, but your heart — it beats for him. 

You don’t know what to say, you only nod at his words. That’s when Sunghoon understood what you meant. Slowly he leans in, closing the space between the two of you. 

You always thought that your first kiss with Sunghoon would be at your wedding. After you two exchange vows. It'll be short yet momentary. Significant in your life and a symbol that you and Sunghoon are going to be together, forever. 

But as he kissed you right now after swearing to prove his worth for you, that’s when it halted you that Sunghoon’s words weren’t just empty promises. The way his lips trailed on yours, hands holding your face gently as he tilts more to deepen the kiss — making you kiss him back, softly yet surely.

You two weren’t wearing your wedding clothes, no rings, nor applauses from the crowd. It’s just the two of you, alone, in your house’ living room.

As you two broke from the kiss, Sunghoon’s forehead rested on yours, catching each other’s breath, you can see the small smile forming on Sunghoon’s lips. 

“Tell me it’s true Sunghoon,” you whispered to him, eyes never leaving him. “I want to hear it from you.”

“I love you y/n,” Sunghoon confesses. “It has always been you, and no one else.” 

You could only chuckle in disbelief as you felt a tear fall from your eyes, Sunghoon quickly wiped it off with his thumb before pulling you for another kiss, to which you responded quickly. From there, everything started to heat up, you could only place your arms around Sunghoon’s neck as you two continued to kiss like there’s no tomorrow. 

Sunghoon didn’t waste any second. He grabs you by your thighs, lifting you up with ease without breaking the kiss, while you wrap your legs around his waist for support. The two of you ended up in his room wherein he gently placed you down to his bed. 

“Are you sure about this?” he softly asked, eyes never leaving yours. He looks at you lovingly, like he was mesmerized that you’re his. 

“I’m sure,” you answered. “And I’m sure that it’s going to be you Sunghoon.” 

“I’ll take good care of you then,” Sunghoon answered before leaning down for another kiss. You only closed your eyes and kissed Sunghoon back. 

You can feel it. The longing of tasting each other. The way Sunghoon kisses you gently, taking his time to savor you as he deepens his lips on you more. Soft nibbles on your lower lip making you whimper softly.

It went on and on, no one dared to break the kiss. Both hands trying to navigate each other. His right hand finds its way to yours, clasping between your fingers as he rests it on the side of your head. 

Sunghoon breaks from the kiss, but immediately places his lips on your jawline until it reaches your neck. Planting soft kisses like he wanted to taste every skin of yours. His left hand finds its way to your body, gently tracing your upper body as you grasp on his sheets. 

“Can I?” he asked, tugging at the hem of your shirt, which you nodded feverishly. You lifted yourself slightly for Sunghoon to remove your shirt before removing his shirt too. His toned body, and carved abs revealed in front of you which you could only stare for a minute. Who would’ve thought that underneath those baggy hoodies and large shirts, is a godlike body? 

On the other hand, Sunghoon didn’t waste any time, he grabs your face once again, locking you to a kiss that’s more intense, hungrier than earlier. He was battling to get a taste of you more, tongue swiping on your lower lip making you moan, you could only shut your eyes as Sunghoon sloppily entered his tongue inside you.

Teeths clashing, tongue travelling inside you, your body started to heat up as Sunghoon continued to taste your lips further. He then started targeting your neck, making you tilt your head to make room for him. Hot, messy, wet kisses trailing on every skin his lips could reach. You let out a soft moan as Sunghoon’s hands trailed towards your bra, softly cupping your breast while his lips continued to bite your neck, sucking it lightly leaving purple marks all over it.  

“So beautiful, only for me right?” he whispered to your left ear, planting a kiss on it before glancing at you. 

“Only for you Hoon,” you whispered back, Sunghoon merely chuckling before darting his eyes on your lower body. 

“Is this your first?” he asked, you only nod.

“Been waiting for you.” you muttered, and the next thing you knew, Sunghoon’s lips were on yours once again. 

“Good girl, we’ll make it worth it yeah?” Sunghoon asked. “It’ll be special for us, we’ll be each other’s first. I told you I’ll prove my worth to you.” 

Sunghoon gently unbuttons your pants before tugging it downwards, leaving you in your panties while he hastily removes his shorts, leaving him in his boxers. 

“Come here love,” he gestured as he sat on the mattress, you only followed him as he pulled you to sit on his lap. A gasp leaving your lips as you could only hold your breath, feeling Sunghoon hard underneath. He’s big. You can feel it as you sit prettily on it, your clothed cunt just right above it. 

Your thoughts only trailed off as Sunghoon continued to kiss you, hands attempting to unclasp your bra which made you chuckle in the middle of your makeout. You helped him unclasp it before throwing the bra somewhere. 

“So fucking gorgeous for me,” Sunghoon gestured. His hands started circling on your boobs, cupping your right side making you whimper. Sunghoon's eyes never leaving yours as his hands trailed downwards, fingers tracing every skin of your body until it reached the hem of your panties. 

“Is it okay?” he asked. 

“Please Sunghoon,” you pleaded, unable to ignore the heat that you’ve been feeling. 

Sunghoon’s fingers delicately feather on your clothed pussy. You softly moan as his palms cup it, rubbing on it as the slightest friction heats you furthermore. You wanted more, unknowingly you bucked your hips to his hand. Sunghoon fastens the way he rubs your pussy as you continue grinding against it. 

“Sunghoon —” 

“Do you want to touch mine too?” he asked, tone deeper than usual. You only stared at him for a good minute before you nod. 

Sunghoon grabs your hand, gently guides it until your palm rests on his hard-on. It’s straining underneath his boxer, and just from your touch, you know that one hand wasn’t enough. You palmed it slowly, hearing soft breathing Sunghoon which fueled something in you.

“Can I do it?” you asked, your hands trailing on the hem of his boxer. 

“Go on love,” he whispered, planting a kiss on your temple. 

You pulled Sunghoon’s boxer, his hard length springing from it. Hard and thick, you looked at Sunghoon as you wrapped your hands around it, and you’re right, one hand isn’t enough. Your hands reach its tip, the pre-cum budding on its end, having you smear it as you circled your palms on his tip. 

You watched as Sunghoon looked at you darkly. A faint smirk on his lips as you felt his fingers slipped under your panties, you let out a soft moan as his fingers found their way on your pussy. Softly trailing on its lips before going up to your clit, three fingers circling it slowly which made you twitch for a second. 

Your hands started to stroke Sunghoon’s cock, slow and steady like you're memorizing every inch of it. It goes the same with him as he continues to rub your clit, harder leaving you breathless as you continue to pump his cock faster, squeezing his tip at every chance that you can. Earning breathy groans from him. 

“Going to prepare you love, just breathe for me okay?” Sunghoon instructed and you could only moan in response. Your other hand found its hold on his shoulders, head resting on it as you nervously can feel his fingers near your entrance. 

“You’re so wet for me, so fucking good,” he whispered to you, before slipping inside your pussy. You let out a deep sigh as his index finger rested inside you. “Just relax for me okay?” slowly he drags his fingers in and out, watching you fall in front of him as you couldn’t do anything but to leave breathy moans. 

“Sunghoon —” you called out as you could feel him insert another finger inside you, the sudden move made you squeeze his dick hard, making Sunghoon curse under his breath. You mindlessly continued to stroke it as Sunghoon’s fingers circled inside you. 

“Relax for me love, we don’t want to hurt you,” Sunghoon assured, kissing your right temple as he continued to finger you. It’s playing inside you, knuckles deep as his long fingers kept pumping inside you, curling at a spot that you feel sensitive the most. He’s stretching you, trying his best to prepare you, his fingers continue to scissor your walls at a right pace, reaching deep inside you.

“I want to come,” you mumbled as you could feel it coming inside you. Your hands gave up on stroking his dick, which made Sunghoon slow down his actions.

“You’re going to come with me inside, can you do that?” you quickly nod in his words, kissing his lips as he removed his fingers from you. You didn’t miss the way your pussy ached, but Sunghoon was quick to grab your waist. 

Gently, he lays you down on his bed, and you watch as he reaches for his bedroom’s drawer, pulling the upper box and scavenging something there. 

“Why —”

“Just making sure we’re safe,” Sunghoon told you. 

“Yeah, but why do you have that…” you mindlessly asked, heat rushing towards your cheeks as you stared at Sunghoon. 

“Heeseung gave it to me as a joke —” Sunghoon groans, embarrassed. “But at least we’re safe, right?”

“Right,” you whispered, leaning more against the pillow. 

Sunghoon removes his boxer. Your eyes wandered at his cock again, hard and lengthy, you could only bite your lips as you wondered how it would fit you. Sunghoon eyes on you, like he's ready to devour as he pumps his cock with his right hand while he bites on the foil packet, tearing it open and grabbing the condom, sheathing it on his already sensitive cock. 

Both of you never left each other’s gaze, you lifted your lower body for you to remove your panties, shamelessly spreading your legs in front of him. Your heart started to beat fast, nervousness started to hit you, but you were only assured when Sunghoon planted another kiss on your lips. 

“Take a deep breath for me, okay? I’ll put on the tip first,” he guided you. You only nod at his words, laying back as you try to relax yourself. 

Sunghoon could only bite his lips as he stared at you, legs spread with your glistening pussy on display. You’re his. You’re his to keep. Something about that thought had Sunghoon’s heart racing, unraveling a feeling of having you all by himself. 

Sunghoon kneels in front of you, hands on your thighs as he hovers over you. He grabs his cock, stroking it steadily making him hiss lightly, at the same time, he grazes it on your cunt’s lips, making you moan. 

You took a deep breath as you felt Sunghoon’s dick on your entrance, its girth enough for you to whimper even though it was just a tip. Sunghoon kept on glancing at you, trying to test if you can take it, careful as he pushed his tip inside you, making you let out a soft groan. 

“Fuck Hoon,” you said, feeling your entrance tearing apart. 

“It’s just my tip love,” Sunghoon told you, “we can stop if you want —”

“No, no, I want it,” you let out a sigh. “Please, just go slowly.” 

“You want it all inside?” Sunghoon asked, eyes wide. 

“I want to feel you, Hoon.”

Sunghoon was hesitant, seeing your eyes start to water, he was scared. You noticed the way his expression shifted, quickly pulling him for a short kiss with your eyes firm on him. There, he was assured, a short nod as a signal. 

“Alright, relax for me okay? We’ll take it slow.” 

Sunghoon started slow. Only pushing his tip in and out, so that you can still feel good. Then, he started to insert himself inside you, slow and careful while you could only take hasty breaths, holding it every time you felt yourself getting stretched. 

“You’re so fucking tight,” Sunghoon whispered. “So small and tight, you really waited for me huh?”

“Hoon —”

“It’s okay baby, I can move if you want me to,” Sunghoon assured. 

You tried to adjust to his size, you’re too full and his dick’s fully sheathed inside you, but it feels good, you wanted more of him. You tried to move, bucking your hips upwards to test the waters, making Sunghoon glance at you. 

“You wanted it baby?” he asked, before spreading your legs wider, wrapping it around his waist as he hovered over you. 

“You can move now Hoon,” you said. 

Sunghoon moved for a bit, carefully checking on you in case you might get hurt. But you quickly nodded, he pulled his dick out of your pussy, eyes surprised as the blood smeared all over the condom. It’s normal. He thought, but it still made him worried. 

“I think I tore you,” he mumbled to you.

“I don’t care,” you replied. “Fuck, just put it in Hoon.” 

With that, Sunghoon chuckles darkly. “Impatient already?”

Without a warning, Sunghoon pushes himself inside you, making you heave out a moan. A mouthful of curses leaving his lips as he started to thrust himself inside you. A steady pace that’s not rough enough for you but will leave you crying out of pleasure. He continued doing so, until he fastened his pace, too lost in the pleasure of his cock ramming your walls. Sunghoon could only utterly groan as your pussy continued sucking him in. 

“Only for me —” Sunghoon moans. “So tight for me, there’s my good girl.”

“Hoon —” 

“Want me to go faster? Want to take all of me?”

“Please — ugh, faster please.”

Sunghoon answers your pleas, grabbing your waist, lifting your stomach area, and in a second, he pulls his cock slowly and slams it inside you harshly, making you moan loudly as the pleasure was too much for you. Hands tightly gripping the sheets as your toes started to curl. Only wanton moans and Sunghoon’s names would leave out of your lips, calling his name like a mantra as his dick keeps on abusing your hole, reaching to the deepest part, feeling how his tip rubs a sensitive spot. 

“Hoon, want you —” you called out, stretching your hands which Sunghoon eagerly accepted. Both hands intertwined, placed both either on the sides of your head as Sunghoon continued to thrust inside you. 

Sunghoon locks his lips on you once again. A feverish makeout, making everything hot yet intimate as both your bodies were glued together. Skin to skin, not minding the warm temperature the room exceeds and how sticky both you are with your sweats. All that matters was how he kisses your lips like it’s his last meal on Earth, savoring the taste of it while his cock underneath fastens its pace.

“You’re so beautiful, all mine right?” he growled on your lips, making a short thrust which left you gasping. He can feel it, your pussy tightening, almost wanting for him to not leave, he continues to thrust in such pace as he watches your face distorting in an unreadable expression.

“Come on, say it love,” he commanded, giving you another thrust so hard that you choke under your breath. 

“All y-yours! Fuck —” you cried, everything is too overwhelming for you. But Sunghoon was relaxed as he continued abusing your pussy. 

“So good for me,” Sunghoon kisses your temples. 

You could only close your eyes, too shut that it hurts. Concealing every cry as your legs started to shake, stomach coiling, and unable to control your breathing. 

“Hoon —”

“Gonna come now love?” you heard Sunghoon asked, and your choked moan was the only thing you could say. 

“Let’s come together, hold it for me can you?” Sunghoon fastened his pace, leaving you crying out of pleasure. He can feel everything tightening, his dick twitching indicating that he’s also near. It didn’t help that you’re sucking him hard. Everything just feels good for both of you, but Sunghoon wanted for it not to end. He wanted to linger more, to touch you more until he memorized everything about you. 

“Fuck —” Sunghoon was almost shaking, his grip on your hand tighten as he glances at you one last time, he leans forward sealing you to a kiss so soft that it completely contrasts how the rough thrusts that he gives. 

“Go on, come,” he whispered to you, thrusting sharply that you could only moan as your wave of orgasm came rushing inside you. Your legs shake violently as you let out soft breathing and whimpers. You weren't able to sink in how Sunghoon groaned at the same time as you, his thrust becoming sloppy as he came inside the condom. He thrusted a few times before pulling out, you could only whine because of the loss, not being able to process as Sunghoon lay down beside you. 

Sunghoon quickly wraps his arms around you, pulling you a hug which only makes you drowsy. You can feel his skin against you, his warm touch that felt more nothing but a comfort to you.

“Does it hurt?” he asked, breaking the silence between the two of you. 

“It does,” you answered. Now that the high has left you, you can feel your cunt aching due to the sudden penetration. It did feel good but you didn’t expect for it to still ache afterwards. 

“I’ll run a bath for us, don’t sleep on me yet,” he suggested. 

“But I’m sleepy,” you mumbled. “Can we just stay like this?”

“Let’s clean each other first, come on,” he pulled himself away from you, you could only watch as he sat on the bed. Pulling the soiled condom, seeing it all bloodied, Sunghoon’s lips turned into a thin line before tying it and covering it with tissue. He throws it in the trash bin before walking towards his bedroom’s bathroom. 

A few minutes later, he returned to grab you, carrying you bridal style which you didn’t mind, too tired to think about. The bathtub was only halfway full but Sunghoon quickly dips both of you inside. Your back resting against his back as you could only hum, relaxing into the warm water. 

“You okay?” he asked, his arms possessively wrapping around you. 

“I’m tired,” you mumbled. “I want to sleep.”

You hear Sunghoon chuckle, “never thought you'd be the type to get tired after one round.”

“I didn’t know it’ll be this tiring,” you mumbled. “Or maybe I was also tired from packing my things.”

“Which wasn’t necessary,” he kisses your temples. “Because you’re still staying here with me.” 

You only hum at his sentence, closing your eyes as you rested your head on his shoulder. 

“Just rest for me okay? I’ll take care of you.” 

“Alright.” 

“I love you,” Sunghoon stated, a loving kiss planted on your head. 

“I love you too.”

-

Last night felt like a dream. 

You opened your eyes to see yourself in a familiar room. Its silence comforts you in an indescribable way. Seeing how the sunlight sweeps through its curtains, indicates that you’ve slept past your usual wake time — a rare thing for you to happen. You sat up from the bed, noticing that the sheets are different and so are your clothes. A large shirt that almost pooled your thighs along with some boxer shorts in the shades of blue, hitting you immediately with reality. 

Last night felt like a dream but you remember every detail of it vividly. You could only hug your knees as the sudden shame came rushing to you. Cheeks are heating up as you can still feel sore down there. Never expect that everything will lead to you losing your virginity to Sunghoon. 

You can feel your heart beating, you remember every word said last night. The arguments, and promises, the way Sunghoon looked at you — everything. Everything was real yet it felt surreal. That’s when you glance to your left and see it empty. Sunghoon’s not here, and the thought of Sunghoon leaving you shadowed over your mind. 

Quickly, you jumped out of the bed. Light footsteps open the door of his room, and as you skirt outside, you can hear the faint sound of cooking in the kitchen — that’s when you felt relief. 

Slowly, you entered the kitchen to see Sunghoon cooking what you concluded were pancakes. He places the last batch on a plate before turning off the stove, turning around only to be surprised to see you standing there.

Silence devoured both of you. Not knowing what to say at all. After all the fiasco that you two had, some issues that needed to be solved, and of course, last night’s intimacy, everything suddenly felt awkward for both of you. 

“Good morning,” Sunghoon breaks the ice first. “You’re awake now, let’s have some breakfast.”

“I thought you left,” you blurted out, immediately sinking in that you shouldn’t have said that. 

You saw the way Sunghoon's forehead creased, confused. “Left? Why would I leave, I stay here.” 

“You stay here?” you asked. 

Sunghoon only quips a small smile, “I stayed here, waiting for you…hoping that you’ll come home.” 

“Oh.” you only look away, embarrassed at the thought, and yet, a part of you was surprised by what you heard. 

Sunghoon really meant what he said, and the thought that he waited for you to come home instead of going after you — he gave you time to think and waited for you to return, while at the same time, it gave him time to navigate his feelings for you. He’s right. It wasn’t too late for everything. 

Sunghoon places down the plate on the dining table. While you only sat on the chair, watching Sunghoon set up the table for you. He offers the plate for you as he sits beside you. From there, you two sat in silence, eating the perfectly-cooked pancakes. 

Weird. You thought as you took small bites on the food. Everything feels at ease, but you know that there’s still many issues that two have to address. Last night was just a swirl of each other’s emotions, although a proof of each other’s promises, you still don’t know what to do with your situation with Sunghoon. 

“What — what happened last night?” you asked. Sunghoon chokes on his food, startling you. “I mean, during the bath —”

“Oh, you fell asleep halfway, nothing happened after, I slept eventually,” Sunghoon explained.

“Alright,” you mumbled, clearing your throat. As you looked at your unfinished plate, you wondered about the two of you, almost immediately things won’t be easily like the way it was. 

“Hoon,” you whispered, trying to carefully set the atmosphere. 

“Is there something wrong?” he asked, almost concerned. 

“I just — I don’t know what to do with us,” you confessed, almost bitterly smiling. “All my life, I always knew what to do, I had a clear path of everything, dragging you in it which you obviously didn’t want to. But now that we have different goals, what about us?”

Sunghoon quietly looks at you. His soft expression completely contrasts the worried look on your face. Gently, he brushes the stray hair that covers your face, with his hand on the back of your neck, Sunghoon remains quiet as a smile forms on his face. 

“I’m not leaving you y/n, don’t worry about us. Let’s just support each other alright? I know it’ll be hectic for each of us because we’re going different place, but this place,” Sunghoon’s eyes wandered around the house. “This is going to be our home. We’ll make it a home for us.” 

“What about our engagement? It’s over now,” you asked, worried. 

“Let’s get engaged when we’re ready, okay? Not because our parents set us up, I want our relationship to be genuine and real. I still have to prove my love for you.”

You only chuckle. “You already did.”

“It’s not enough, one night doesn’t change anything.” 

You only nod at his words. “Thank you Sunghoon, for giving me another chance.” 

“I should be the one who’s thankful to you, you never gave up on me even when I treat you badly,” he insisted, making you laugh. 

“It’s my fault too, I shouldn’t have pushed you to my dreams too much.” you rebutted. “But I’m here now, I’ll support you in your dream.” 

“That’s all I need to hear,” Sunghoon stated.

Nodding at his words, Sunghoon pulls you for a hug, his arms instinctively lifting you from your seat, pulling you to his lap to hold you even more tightly. You rest your head on his shoulder as your arms swing around his neck. 

Silence hovered the dining area. You two remained there, never letting go of each other. The tranquility gives you two peace, feeling nothing but each other’s warmth as Sunghoon traces circle around your back, while you rest idly on him. It was comforting and assuring, and your heart swells in joy because your future with Sunghoon was never lost to you. 

-

Epilogue.

As you open the door of your house, you immediately switch the lights on, revealing its comforting silence that only made you smile. The smell of lavender and eucalyptus filled the room, the relaxing scent coming from the air diffuser you and Sunghoon bought a few months ago, automatically reminds you of your lover.

“Hoon, I’m home!” you shouted, removing your sneakers when you heard the door of your shared room (formerly Sunghoon’s room) open. Sunghoon approaches you with a smile, gently cupping your cheeks to seal a kiss. 

“Welcome home,” he greets, making you smile. 

“What’s the occasion? You’re all dressed-up, or have you just got home from your class?” A year wasn’t that long, but a lot of things have changed between you and Sunghoon. 

Sunghoon was given another chance from Decelis to finish his degree in medbio, stating that it’ll be a waste for him to not continue it. Although the two of you knew that the degree is deemed useless, Sunghoon let it be, a deal that he had with his parents for him to continue playing in the band. 

After graduation, you agreed to Sunghoon to take a few months before entering medical school. Although you’re already on board to attend Decelis Medical School, you decided to take time to spend with the people you love because you know how hectic med school will be. 

Arcanum continued performing. After graduation, they became an independent band. Slowly, their popularity is starting to rise. Getting invited to events, university festivals, and of course, they still do their gig in The Rabbit Hole, which became more popular and crowded than ever. You, on the other hand, always manage time to watch their performance along with the other band members’ girlfriends — who you eventually became friends with. 

“I’m taking you out for dinner,” Sunghoon simply replied, grabbing your bag as he scurried his way back to your bedroom, which you only followed. 

“Why? What’s the special occasion?” you asked, laughing. 

“Nothing, just want to take my girl out, is that so bad?” Sunghoon grins, and your gleaming eyes can see how excited he is, like he’s preparing for something.

You only hum, as you proceed to your shared closet. “Alright, let me just freshen up for a bit and change.”

You two arrived at the restaurant not an hour later. The receptionist guided you to your reservation which surprised you because Sunghoon had reserved a private room for the two of you. 

“This is,” you held your breath as you looked at the room. Nostalgia hits you because Sunghoon had brought you to the place where you two were formally engaged by your family. 

“You still remember it?” he asked, smiling. 

“Of course,” you could only mumble. “I was nervous. We were friends who suddenly became fiances at eighteen, it was a sudden turn.” 

“I was nervous too, but I was in relief because my family chose you,” Sunghoon confesses. “Although we went through a rough path, I’m glad we were able to overcome it.” 

You only smiled back at him. “So am I.” 

Food arrived minutes later, along with some white wine of Sunghoon’s choice. The two of you spent the remaining time reminiscing, talking mostly about your childhood days, especially the embarrassing moments that had you two laughing loudly. 

“I have some news for you,” Sunghoon blurted out, completely changing the topic between the two of you. 

“What is it?’ you asked, taking small sips from your glass. 

“Daydream Records called yesterday,” Sunghoon started, his smile grew wider, eyes almost turning into a curve. “They’re interested in having us in their label, it’s a five-year contract and they will manage everything for us — can you believe it!?”

“Oh my god —” words got stuck in your throat. Immediately, you stood up from your seat, approaching Sunghoon who only waited for you to fall into his arms. Pulling you on his lap as you embraced him tightly. “Hoon, oh my god — this is good news! You guys will become famous!” 

“Becoming famous is still far for us, but no more hassle schedules, and Heeseung’s girl doesn’t need to partake in managing us, we’ll have our own manager, our own studio — everything!” Sunghoon excitedly shared, making you smile wider. 

“That’s great love, I’m so, so proud of you and Arcanum,” you only said, leaning on him to give him a deep kiss on the lips which he only reciprocated. 

“We’ll be busy this year, you’re going to attend Decelis in two months, while once we sign our contracts, we’ll be gearing up to release our debut single.” Sunghoon explained. “We might always come home to an empty house now.”

“Are you afraid?” you asked worriedly.

“Of course not, I have faith in both of us, but y/n,” he settles you on the chair in front of him. Hands holding you as he gives you an assuring smile. “We might not see each other from time to time because we’re too busy, but I want to let you know that I will always support you no matter what.”

Before you could say anything, Sunghoon grabs something from his coat’s inner pocket, your eyes widening at the velvet box that he’s holding. 

“Hoon,” you whispered.

“We were tied to be married when we were young, and we promised that we’ll only get married when we’re ready, and though one year has passed and a lot of things have changed, we still have a long way to go, for us.” Sunghoon stated.

You remained quiet, only staring at him who gently cups your face. 

“I want you to think of me whenever you see this ring,” he said as he proceeded to open the box. Your eyes widened at the pair of rings — both have subtle engraved diamonds, with the other one thinner with a much more intricate design. 

“And I’ll think of you whenever I see the ring too,” Sunghoon added. “It’s a promise ring. A promise for us that we’ll be with each other no matter what. It’ll be our strength especially during hard times.”

Tears started flowing from your eyes, out of happiness, you let out a choked laugh as you wiped your tears away — bumping into Sunghoon's hands who faltered a laugh as he gently wiped the tears away. 

“Hoon, I don’t know what to say…I love it — gosh, I love you so, so much, you don’t know how happy this makes me,” you could only say, almost stumbling to your words.

Sunghoon didn’t say a word. He removes the ring and gently puts it in your ring finger, fitting perfectly like it was meant for you. You copied his action, grabbing the other band and placing it in his ring finger. 

“Promise me that you’ll be there for me,” Sunghoon stated. 

“Of course, I’ll be there for you, just like you’ll be with me,” you only smiled. “Forever.” 

Sunghoon grabs your cheeks once again, planting a kiss on your lips which you delicately replied, sealing the promise you two have. Breaking the kiss, Sunghoon only stared at you, eyes brightening as his smile became wider. 

“Forever.” 

[cap-trio]

No Grave Can Hold My Body Down (I'll Crawl Home to Her)

Summary: After a bad fight, Matt ends up in a coma. Unsure if he's going to make it or not, you decide to finally get something off your chest. It feels safer to confess assuming he most likely can't hear you, but when Matt wakes up, you find out you were wrong.

Pairing: Matt Murdock x Reader

Tags: Angst, fluff, friends to lovers, love confessions

TW: Mention of a coma and hospitals

Word count: 4.5K | Read on AO3

You get the phone call on a Tuesday night.

It started as a typical day; you got up at 6:00 on the dot to get ready for work. Matt met you at your door at 7:30 to walk with you, despite your numerous protests you could make it to work fine on your own. Not to mention your apartment was out of his way by ten minutes. But he knew about the danger that lurked around every corner of Hell’s Kitchen and when it came to you, he wasn’t going to take any chances.

Foggy’s name lights up your phone. Nothing out of the ordinary, but things go south as soon as you accept the call. “Hey, what’s -”

“Matt’s in the hospital,” he interrupts. “He’s in a coma.”

The phone falls to the ground, and you ignore Foggy’s voice calling your name. You don’t care that the screen is definitely cracked. You have tunnel vision and can only focus on Matt. You hear Foggy repeatedly asking if you’re okay and that you’re still on the line.

Sinking to the ground, you pick the phone back up. “Sorry, I’m here. What hospital?”

After getting the address, you make it there in record time. You don’t even bother waiting for the elevator, instead climbing the stairs two at a time to floor five. The ICU.

Foggy and Karen greet you in the lobby. Both look disheveled, with fresh tears on their cheeks, dark circles under their eyes, and hair askew from constantly running their hands through it. “What happened? Is he…” going to make it? You can’t bring yourself to finish the question. If you don’t say it, you won’t accidentally speak it into existence. You don’t want to let your thoughts go down that path, but how can you not?

“Fisk got to him,” Karen’s voice is low. “We don’t know what Matt told them happened, or if he said anything at all.”

“He called me, and I knew this was worse than the other times. He could barely breathe and then he passed out. I called 911, then you guys. It’s just been a waiting game.” Foggy takes a deep breath. “All I could make out was something about Fisk and how he got the upper hand this time.”

It takes every last ounce of strength not to collapse to the floor. Karen notices and leads you over to the seating area. “When can I see him?”

“We aren’t sure; they haven’t left his room. No updates yet, ” Foggy replies. 

You were on a mission to get to the hospital as fast as you could. Now that you’re here, everything hits you like a truck. It’s a pain you’ve never felt before, like someone carved a hole in your chest, ripping out your heart like they were pulling weeds out of a garden, leaving you hollow. So hollow you can’t even cry. Everything is just numb like the switch controlling your emotions was flipped off. It’s like an out-of-body nightmare; you’re aware it’s not real, but you’re stuck anyway, forced to live in it. What you wouldn’t give for this to only be a fucked up dream. 

The three of you sit in the lobby, hands interlocked, waiting in silence. Between the fluorescent lighting beating down like the sun, the faint sound of heart monitors, and the receptionists carrying on conversations like you weren’t at risk of losing your friend, you knew you couldn’t handle it for much longer before going crazy.  

Maybe that would be okay though. It would prove you could still feel something other than the shell of who you were an hour ago. 

“Am I broken?” Your voice is just above a whisper. “Why am I not breaking down in tears? Or having a panic attack?”

“It’s a stressful situation. Your body doesn’t know how to respond, so it’s pretty much just…not. It’s normal to shut down, so I promise you aren’t broken,” Karen assures you.

“I’m at the same level. I don’t want this to be real, so my body is responding like it’s not. Like this is all some fucked up dream,” Foggy adds.

For some reason, Foggy’s words are what bring on the tears. Not a gut-wrenching sob like you had expected, but still something. “Shit, was it something I said?” He asks.

“No. Yes,” you let out a small laugh. “I was just thinking how grateful I am that you two are here with me. If I were alone…” You don’t finish the thought, and you don’t need to. They know exactly what you mean.

Karen pulls you in for a hug, shedding a few tears herself. Foggy tries to brush off how he’s doing the same. The receptionist notices and quietly brings over an extra box of tissues and gives an apologetic smile. The sound of the door opening separates you three in hopes it’s any sort of update, but they go to the other family waiting.

An hour passes. You don’t move from your seat.

Another hour. Foggy goes to the vending machine for snacks. You don’t eat.

The third hour is when the panic really starts to seep in. You don’t want to be one of those people, but you’re about to go to the desk and demand some sort of update. Instead, you pace around the lobby to try and release the nervous energy.

The sound of the doors opening again freezes you in your tracks. Finally, a doctor appears. “Murdock crew?” She calls out. The three of you race over, but she says, “It’s best if we sit down.” Nervous glances are shared. That’s a telltale sign things are most definitely not good.

“So, I’ll start by saying Matthew has improved since he first arrived. Vitals are almost where we want them, but he needs to stay in a medically induced coma while we continue working on him. I don’t want to make any guarantees as he’s still in bad shape. Matthew is suffering from a concussion, several broken ribs, and internal bleeding. The coma could last up to a month, depending on whether or not he shows signs of recovery.”

Whether or not. Her words ring in your ears. Or not. Or not. Or not. 

“But he’ll live, right? People have survived worse. He’ll be fine. Right?” Foggy sounds delirious, not that you can blame him. It’s not the update you guys were hoping for.

“Like I said, I don’t want to make any promises. I’m sorry I can’t give any definitive answers. Just know we’re working our absolute hardest.”

“Can we at least see him?” You beg.

“Not tonight, unfortunately. We’re hoping he’ll be ready for visitors in the next few days. We’ll keep you guys updated. For now, I recommend getting some rest and making sure you’re fed and hydrated. In stressful times, we tend to shut down and not take care of ourselves. We’ll call if anything changes, good or bad.”

Good or bad. Or bad. Or bad. Or bad. 

“Thank you,” Karen says with a small smile.

She leaves the three of you alone again. “I don’t want to go home,” you admit. If something happens and you aren’t here, you’ll never forgive yourself. 

“They don’t let people stay overnight,” Foggy sighs. “My apartment is the closest, why don’t we all head there and at least try to sleep?”

You’re all too exhausted to walk, so Karen hails a taxi. No one speaks, not even the driver. He takes one look at your group, mumbles a “sheesh” to himself, and starts the drive to Foggy’s apartment. 

He provides some pajamas for you and Karen while you all set up camp in the living room. Phones charging and on the loudest setting, you all settle into your positions for the night. Karen on the couch, you on an air mattress, Foggy on the loveseat. It would almost be a fun sleepover if not given the circumstances. Not to mention how empty it feels without Matt.

You weren’t sure you’d be able to sleep, but the fatigue kicks in and you can’t resist it any longer. Hoping to get an escape from this hell, you close your eyes and slip into an escape.

“We’re sorry. We tried everything, but Matthew wasn’t able to pull through. You’re welcome to come in and say your goodbyes. Again, our condolences. He was a fighter.” A painful sob comes from deep within you. You don’t even recognize yourself, everything feels raw and cracked. Grief fills you to the brim, like a thick smoke clouding your lungs, enough to leave you choking and gasping for air. You follow behind Foggy and Karen to say your goodbyes to Matt. The sight of him lying lifeless in the hospital bed sends you collapsing to the floor.

You wake with a scream. Foggy and Karen shoot up, immediately asking what happened. You can’t answer yet; your body takes a second to come back to reality and recognize it was just an awful dream. But it could happen, a twisted voice reminds you. 

“I’m so sorry. I was having a nightmare, and it felt so real,” you sigh. 

“It’s okay, we’re here,” Karen squeezes your hands. “I think we all had the same dream.”

Foggy nods in agreement. “Just wanted to get some rest, but here we are.” He chuckles humorlessly. 

No one knows what to say next. Nothing can be said to make anyone feel better; trying would be pointless. It would all just feel like one person is saying what everyone wants to hear when really, no one has a clue how this will play out.

“Maybe we watch a movie? It doesn’t seem like sleep is an option, and it might be somewhat of a distraction,” Karen suggests. 

It’s better than sitting in silence, especially when that silence invites dark thoughts to creep in, so Foggy fires up the TV and finds the most absurd comedy he can find.

Eventually, the three of you are able to doze off again by the time a second movie plays. No bad dreams happen this time, but the sound of someone's ringtone jostles everyone awake. The small amount of light peaking in lets you know it's sometime the next day, but everything feels disorienting.

Foggy answers and puts the phone on speaker. “Hello, we’d like to let you know Matt is ready for visitors. Our visiting hours are from 9:00 a.m to 9:00 p.m every day. If anything about that changes, we’ll reach out.” 

“Thank you so much,” Foggy says before hanging up. Everyone takes a few minutes to freshen up before catching a cab back to the hospital. Anxiety courses through you, though it's different from last night. You’re not sure what you're going to say to Matt, or how he’ll look; you feel entirely unprepared. Having Karen and Foggy with you makes it a little less scary at least.

Karen checks in with the receptionist, and five minutes later a nurse comes to let the three of you in. She pauses outside his door. “I want to warn you that he looks pretty beaten up. It won't be easy seeing him in this state, but having someone with him might be good for his recovery.”

She has everyone take a deep breath before opening the door. Matt looks similar to how he did in your nightmare, all bloody and bruised, hooked up to various machines with tubes. You’ve seen him after a fight before, even helped clean him up, but it was never like this. Not even what the nurse said could’ve prepared you. 

“What should we say to him? Anything that could make him wake up?” You ask.

“Hearing familiar voices is good no matter what. We recommend just telling him about your day, or maybe reading him a book he likes. Anything that feels right for you.”

None of this feels right, you want to scream. Instead you thank her for the tips. 

“I’ll leave you guys alone, but feel free to press that button if you need anything at all.” She gestures to a CALL button near Matt’s bed before slipping out the door.

It's silent at first while everyone takes in the sight of him. 

“Maybe tell him a story from college?” You suggest to Foggy. “It might be good to hear something familiar.”

He launches into the avocados at law story which has you and Karen laughing. You would’ve loved to have known them back then.

“I don’t think anything I say will top that,” Karen says. “I don’t even know what to say, anyway.”

Foggy assures her anything will be better than nothing, so she tearfully tells Matt how grateful she is for her and Foggy’s help during her trial. It moves you and Foggy to tears too, and everyone ends up a blubbery mess.

“Sorry to kill the mood,” she chuckles. “What’ve you got?” She asks you.

You decide to tell him about the first day he showed up at your apartment to walk you to work. How you weren’t expecting him at all, given that you’d only been friends for a few weeks at that point and he never mentioned he would be there. How even though you poked fun at him for it at first, he makes you feel safer and you’re lucky to have him.

“I didn’t even know he does that,” Karen says.

“I always thought it was weird when he’d be late for work when it wasn’t related to his…activities,” Foggy adds, not knowing if anyone outside the room could hear. “He really loves us all, huh?”

That brings on more tears. How grateful are you all to have someone like Matt in your lives?

“Alright, I think I’ve had enough crying for the rest of my life,” Karen laughs.

“I think it’d be good to talk about our day like the nurse suggested,” you say. “Not after we found out what happened, but before that.”

And that’s what the three of you do for the next week and a half, once a day and always together. Foggy brings up the idea of doing separate visits, suggesting it might be good for some alone time with him. 

Your first visit alone is awkward. Without Karen and Foggy to describe your days together, you aren’t sure what to say. It’s like trying therapy for the first time, knowing you have things to talk about, but being too scared to bring anything up, making it feel too real.

His progress has been up and down, worrying you that it might stay like that for months. Or years. And there is one thing that Matt doesn’t know about you, a secret you’ve acknowledged and thrown into a locked box, refusing to open it. The sick, dark voice from before warns you this may be the only chance you get to tell him.

“Hi, Matt. It’s just me today; we decided it might be good to spend some alone time with you. Uh, today was alright. We went to Josie’s, played some pool, and had a few beers. Felt empty without you though. I’m trying to stall here because I want to tell you something. Something big. But I’m terrified, and a wuss, so I have to do it while you probably can’t hear me or respond at all.” You laugh at yourself for being so ridiculous. 

“Well, here goes nothing,” you pause. “So uh, I’m kind of in love with you? Not sure why I phrased it like a question. I know I’m in love with you, and it scares the shit out of me. We’ve known each other for years, and I don’t know if telling you is worth the risk. I care about you too much to let some feelings get in the way. So yeah, that’s my secret.”

You’re not sure if you feel better or worse now that it’s out there. It feels good to get it off your chest, but nothing has really changed by admitting it. Matt will continue to be oblivious to your feelings while you have to continue carrying them around.

Exhaustion kicks in and you slump back in the chair. Just as your eyes begin to drift shut, you hear a groan and shoot awake. Matt starts stirring, mumbling to himself, and you watch helplessly before adrenaline kicks in.

“Nurse! I need a nurse!” You shout into the hallway. They instruct you to wait in the hall; on your way out, you see Matt’s eyes open and you let out a gasp. You swear you see him reach for you, but you’re also feeling a bit delirious so it could be your mind playing tricks on you.

You call Karen and Foggy with the news. Less than ten minutes later, the three of you are standing outside of his room, playing another round of the dreaded waiting game. You fill them in on the moments leading up to Matt waking up, purposefully leaving out details of the conversation.

Thirty minutes go by until one of the nurses comes into the hallway. “He’s awake and stable. You can come in and see him, but I’ll warn he may be slightly out of it.” 

Matt gives a weak smile as the three of you enter. “How do I look?” 

“Out of it, my ass,” Foggy laughs. “You look like shit.”

“Ouch. Aren’t you supposed to be nice to someone in a hospital bed? A blind man I might add.”

“Little too late to be playing the blind card,” Karen adds.

He turns in your general direction. “What’s your verdict?”

“I’m with these two. You’ve looked better.”

It feels good to be joking around like this again. Things certainly aren’t back to normal, but this is a step in the right direction.

“Even though you hurt my feelings, could we talk alone for a second?” 

Foggy and Karen exchange a look and turn to raise their eyebrows at you. You shrug, indicating you’re not sure what this is about.

“I better get some alone time too,” Foggy pouts.

“There’s plenty of me to go around.”

Your friends leave, and as soon as the door shuts you feel like you’re suffocating with anxiety. What could he want to talk about that he couldn’t say in front of his best friends?

“Can I ask you about something?”

“Of course. Anything.” Your voice shakes when you answer. 

“Earlier, right before I woke up, I thought I heard you say you’re in love with me.” 

Panic settles in hard and fast, like being taken under by a cold ocean wave when your back is facing the water, unexpected and unpleasant. 

Fuck. 

“That’s not a question.” Stupid. It's the only thing your brain can think of to say, trying to delay the shitstorm that’s brewing. 

“Okay,” his mouth quirks up into a small smile, trying to cover a laugh. He knows you well enough to know what you're doing. “Let me rephrase - are you in love with me?”

“I uh, no. I’m not. Must've been a crazy coma dream or something!” Your laugh that follows is too loud and brash to sound even remotely convincing.

“You’re lying.” There isn’t any uncertainty in his voice. He says it like it’s a known fact and not an educated guess. 

“Wow, I feel like I should be offended,” you huff. You’re not sure why you’re angry at him when he’s right. Or maybe you’re angry that this conversation is even happening when you vowed to take these feelings to the grave. “I promise I’m not.”

“You are.” The way he emphasizes the word sucks all the air out of the room. That one word makes everything feel different. It’s confirmation you can’t brush this conversation off. Matt isn’t going to let it go.

“Jesus Matt, can we just drop it? I told you, I never said it. I don’t know why you can’t believe me. And is this really the most important thing to be focusing on right now?”

“To me? Yes, it is that important. And I can tell you’re lying.”

You roll your eyes. He knows even though he can’t see it, because he knows you. “Because of what, my laugh? I admit I sounded weird, but -”

He cuts you off. “It was your heartbeat.” He’s frustrated that you can’t understand, as if this is some normal thing people can do, or like he’s mentioned it before and it’s something you just casually forgot. Like you would ever forget something like that. 

You snort at how unbelievable this situation has gotten. “My heartbeat? What the hell are you talking about?” 

Surely this is a weird side effect of the concussion. Maybe he’s hearing things now? Or he’s playing some weird prank on you? You should probably call the nurse back in.

“I can hear people’s heartbeat. When they lie, it changes rhythms. When you said you aren’t in love with me it got faster. So I’m asking you again, are you in love with me?”

“Matt, you can’t just brush that off like it isn’t the most insane thing I’ve ever heard! You expect me to believe you, especially when you can’t prove it? Look, I’m gonna call in the nurse and have her check your head because clearly, the concussion isn’t any better.” 

You reach for the call button but he grabs your wrist before you can press it. Warmth spreads across the spots where his fingers are touching you. Now is not the time you try to relay that message to your body. It doesn’t listen.

He lets go of your wrist and sighs. “Have I ever lied to you?”

“Yes. You constantly made up excuses when you’d show up to work with mysterious bruises or cuts. Not gonna work in this argument.”

“I didn’t realize we were arguing,” he raises an eyebrow. “But to be fair, that was only to keep you safe. Have I ever lied about anything else?”

“I don’t know, I can’t hear your heartbeat.”

Now he rolls his eyes. “I know you’re trying to avoid talking about it. But please know I wouldn’t make something like this up. After the accident, my senses got heightened more than what would happen to the average person. I know it seems like I’m an asshole for keeping something like this private, like I use it to take advantage of people, but I don’t. Even when someone lies, I don’t force them into telling the truth. It’s a blessing and a curse.”

He sounds exhausted, and can you blame him? Having to live with this gift, but knowing he can’t really do anything with it, would take a toll on anyone. 

But he’s also putting you in an uncomfortable position, despite claiming he doesn’t use it against people. “So why are you doing it to me now?”

“I’m sorry. We can drop it, but don’t you want to know why I’m so hung up on this? Why I’m seconds away from getting on my knees and begging you to tell the truth?”

Yes. No. Because admitting that makes this all too real. Too scary. It opens up a door you want to bolt shut because it allows too many what-ifs into the mix. What if things don’t work out? What if you work better as friends and break up, making everything complicated? You could write a whole book full of different scenarios.

But there is another possibility: what if Matt loves you too? 

It’s enough to make you want to unlock the door and throw it open. “I do.”

Time seems to stand still. You both know what’s coming, and it scares the hell out of you, but it’s worth it. He’s worth it.

“Tell the truth. Please, I want to hear you say it.”

You already did, you want to point out. But now isn’t the time to be a smart ass, not with the way his gaze is piercing you and the tension rising with every second unspoken. 

“I’m in love with you, Matt.”

Thump. Thump. Thump. The sound is music to his ears, better than any song he’s heard. If he wasn’t ruined by you before, he sure is now.

“I’m in love with you too.”

“Good, or else that would’ve been really embarrassing.”

He laughs. “Now was that so hard to admit?”

“Oh please! You didn’t give me much of an option.” You deepen your voice in a terrible attempt to mock him, “I’m Matt and I can hear people’s heartbeats, so I know when they lie. I’m in love with you too, but instead of saving time and saying that, I’m gonna make you do it first. Even though I clearly heard you before.” 

You both erupt into laughter; you can physically feel yourself getting lighter as the crushing weight of tension leaves your body. 

“I’m never going to get over hearing you say that,” he admits.

“I won’t either.” You pause, feeling a shift in the conversation tone. “I honestly never wanted you to know. I only said it because I was scared of losing you, and it was a cowardly way of getting it off my chest. I tried convincing myself maybe you also felt that there was always something more between us, but then I’d get in my head and decide you didn’t. Decided it wouldn’t be worth losing you if I said something and you turned me down, but then I thought I’d lose you in a different way.” Your voice cracks at the end, and you force the tears back in, hating that you’re making things serious again. 

“I’ve always felt it,” Matt confesses. “I never wanted to pressure you or make things weird if I misread the signs. Am I happy this is what it took for us to be together? Of course not, I pictured this moment a million different ways, and not one involved a hospital. But I am happy it happened. So unbelievably happy.”

“I am too. I’ve wanted this for years.”

“I really want to kiss you, but…” he gestures to his current state. 

“We can make it work. We’ll just be careful.”

“I’ll make it up to you when I’m healed,” he smirks. He gets a little cocky from how he can make your heartbeat quicken, and how intimate it is that only the two of you can experience it together.

“Such a tease,” you roll your eyes, leaning down inches from his mouth.

“You’re one to talk.”

And then his mouth is on yours.

His hands cup your chin while yours rests on his hip, careful not to apply any pressure. You can both feel the other holding back; his lips are just grazing yours, but it’s enough to feel like hot lava is coursing through you. If his lingering touches over the years left sparks in their wake, kissing him is like being electrocuted. It’s delicate and sweet and you’re overwhelmed with how right it feels. The only thing on Matt’s mind are you and more, but he knows this is just the beginning. 

So instead he focuses on the now, mentally adding this moment to a scrapbook of memories filled with you.

[aquarius-johnny]

“stress relief” | johnny suh

𝜗𝜚 genre: smut | wc: 5.3k | au: husband! johnny 𝜗𝜚 pairing: johnny suh x afab! reader 𝜗𝜚 warnings: doctor! + dom! johnny, stay-at-home wife! reader, established relationship, domesticity, comfort, free use kink, oral (m! receiving), talking through it, edging, counting down, overstimulation, recording, rough sex, piv, praising, possessiveness, breeding kink, use of vibrator, cock warming, creampie, aftercare, positions — cowgirl/prone/missionary, pet names — baby/sweetheart 𝜗𝜚 summary: johnny comes home after a tough and frustrating day, you — his very loving and doting wife — takes care of him in the best way you can… after all, he does so much for you. 𝜗𝜚 aimee's thoughts 💭 : there’s something about the idea of being johnny’s stay-at-home wife makes my insides tingle. also, this era of johnny is what i imagined he would look like in this fic... do what you want with that info.

As you step out of your bedroom, you hear the front door open then shut, followed by a deep sigh. You peek your head from the hallway to see Johnny undoing his tie before burying his face in his hands, clearly frustrated and overwhelmed.

“Tough day at work?” You ask, leaning your shoulder against the archway. Your voice catches him by surprise and his features soften at the sight of you. “Were your patients mean to you?” You tease.

“A little,” he admits, a tiny smile threatening to pull from the corner of his lips. Removing his tie, he lets the fabric hang on the backrest of a nearby dining chair. He makes his way to you before stopping himself, looking down at his clothes. “I should probably shower before hugging you, just in case.”

“That hasn’t stopped you before,” you cock your head to the side, confused at the sudden concern before pushing it aside. “But I was just about to hop into the shower. Wanna join me?” 

He nods and a relieved smile dances on his lips. 

You both head into the bathroom and you turn the shower’s dial to the temperature comfortable for both you and Johnny — dialing back on the heat since you like it a little hotter than he does.

“What happened at work today?” You ask Johnny as you squeeze his body wash into the wet washcloth before telling him to turn around so you could wash his back. 

He shakes his head. “Nothing out of the ordinary,” he lies.

“You don’t always come home frustrated like this.” 

You feel his shoulders tense up before relaxing, letting you know he’s about to tell you what happened. When he does, you listen intently, offering him little hums as you signal him to turn around so you could wash his chest. 

“So, are you thinking about leaving that hospital?” You wonder, handing him the washcloth to have him wash the rest of his body. 

“Obviously it’s something I hope we could talk about,” he softly lets out. “The position at the other hospital pays more, but the one I’m working at now is only 20 minutes away from here.” 

“Money hasn’t been an issue before,” you scrunch your eyebrows when you look up at him before switching positions, having him under the shower head to rinse off while you begin to wash your own body with another washcloth. 

“Yeah I know,” he sighs. “But I don’t know, what if something happens. I wanna make sure we’re prepared.” 

“What would happen?” 

“I don’t know,” he shrugs. “What if one of us is hospitalized or if we decide to have kids? What if one of our cars breaks down or one of us gets into an accident?” 

You place your soapy hand on his glistening chest. “I get it,” you huff out a tiny laugh. “If this is an issue, then maybe I should start working again.” 

He takes your hand and lowers it before signaling you to turn around. Taking the washcloth you’re using, he begins to wash your back for you. “When we got married, I promised I would take care of you.” He reminds you and you replay the conversation you both had when you finally had the opportunity to quit the god-awful job you worked while Johnny worked towards the goal that got him where he is now. “I intend on keeping that promise.” 

“But not at the expense of you feeling like this,” you retort. “Do you want to take the other position because you want to or is it for the money?”

“It also has really great benefits,” he chuckles.

“Okay, would your workload lighten?” You question.

“Only slightly,” he giggles, handing you your washcloth and holding out a hand for you to help balance yourself as you wash the rest of your body. “A doctor’s workload doesn’t lighten no matter where you go.”

You look up at him, playfully rolling your eyes at his response.

“It’ll also be closer to my parents,” he softly admits, switching places with you again.

“Is that why you wanna move?” You allow the warm water to rise off your back as you await Johnny's answer. 

“Part of the reason.” 

You lift your hand to Johnny’s cheek, stroking it with your thumb. “I think that’s enough of a reason,” you reassure.

“You’re sure? I feel bad that I’ve been dragging you everywhere because of work.” 

“At least this time it’s closer to where you grew up.” You  turn to rinse off the last bits of suds on your body. “Plus, your parents love me. They’ll be happy to have their daughter in law closer to them and they can stop nagging you about us visiting them.”

Johnny lets out a laugh as he wraps his arms around your shoulders, bringing your back into his chest. “I love you,” he whispers. “Thank you for being open and understanding.” 

You turn to face him, your bare chest pressing against his as he hugs you. Peering up through your wet lashes, you notice how he slicks back his hair away from his forehead and a droplet of water rolls from the tips of his hair down his neck. 

“If the roles were reversed, I know you would do the same for me,” you reply. “I intend on taking care of you, too, in any way I can.”

After showering, you find yourself and your husband in bed. You listen to Johnny pour out his other frustrations regarding work. With a towel wrapped around your body and a towel wrapped around his waist, you sit on your knees as you rub your moisturizer onto your face and down your neck as he speaks. 

“Yeah, I can definitely see why you’re frustrated,” you quietly let out, rubbing the excess moisturizer on your hands. “When do you think you’ll send in your resignation?”

“Maybe in a few months, six months tops. It’ll give us time to go apartment shopping before we move.” 

You nod in agreement before reaching over Johnny to place your moisturizer on your bedside table. “Anything I can do to help you relax after the hectic day you had?” You question, straddling his lap as your hands rub against his shoulders. “I can give you a massage,” you pause. “Or do other things, if you’d like.”

Taking your hands into his, he entwines his fingers between yours. “What do you have in mind?” He questions with a slight lift of his brow and a tilt of his head. 

“Something along the lines of you using me however you want,” you grin. “With a little bratiness thrown in here and there because I wouldn’t be your wife without it.” You pause for a second to give him a less explicit option. “Or I can make your favorite comfort meal. It’s up to you.”

With the way his lips lift into a smirk and the way he pulls your towel loose, you know his decision. 

You place yourself between his thighs, untucking the towel that’s wrapped around his waist. Without further instruction or objection, you grab a hold of his cock and lay your head against his toned abdomen. 

You use your tongue to lick against his shaft before pecking kisses against his reddened tip, feeling his cock harden at the touch of your lips. Swirling your tongue over his slit, he gathers your hair to one side and away from your face so he’s able to enjoy the view of his wife’s service. 

He pets your cheek endearingly, silently encouraging you to take more of him. When you do, it’s just his tip your lips wrap around. You use your hand to stroke the rest of his length and he lets out a satisfied sigh. 

“Stick your tongue out,” Johnny softly orders, grabbing a hold of the base of his hardened length. You obediently follow his command and he slaps his shaft against your tongue. The sight of you is so enticing, you see him grinning from ear to ear. 

You take hold of his shaft and you suck on his tip. He lets out a small moan before his head lolls back from pleasure. His hips buck up into you ever so slightly, pushing further into your mouth. 

“Impatient aren’t we?” You smirk as you use your thumb to circle his leaking tip. You peck tender kisses against his shaft, teasing him. “Want me to take all of it already?”

He nods and you see his pupils dilate at the sight of you. Gathering your hair into a makeshift ponytail, you reposition your lips against his cock’s head before engulfing him down your throat.

He sharply inhales before muttering ‘oh fuck’ under his breath at the feeling of your warm mouth around his length. Holding your head in place with your hair that’s fisted between his knuckles, he bucks his hips up into you and watches your lips meet the base of his shaft — soaking in the glorious sight of his lengthy cock disappearing into your mouth as you bob your head up and down.

Your gags bounce off the four walls of your shared bedroom. You slurp up your drool before spitting it back onto his cock and spreading it with your hands, knowing he’s a sucker for your sloppy head. 

Using your mouth as his personal toy, he guides your head up and down before holding you in place as you gag. 

“Breathe through your nose, baby,” he instructs and watches as you follow suit, smiling at how well you follow his directions. “That’s it, good job.” He chuckles in amusement as he lifts your head up again before guiding your mouth back down his shaft. “Good girl,” he deeply groans as he feels you swallow around his tip before hollowing your cheeks. 

When he lifts your head by your hair, he roughly brings your lips to his while you position yourself with his length between your wet folds and pressing against your aroused clit. 

You pull away from his kiss and plant your hands onto his chest, rocking your hips back and forth and mixing your wetness with the saliva coated around his cock. He sees a string of his precum follow your clit when you rub his tip against you. 

His eyes are glued to your movements. One hand rests on your thigh while the other frantically searches for his phone on the bedside table. When he gets a hold of it, he quickly opens up his camera and the little ding coming from his phone tells you he’s recording a video.

As you continue teasing him, you feel him throb under you and his breathing suddenly deepens. He’s watching you through his phone screen and his eyes light up with lust. You notice how the protruding bump of his adam’s apple bobs up and down when he swallows and how his lips part, as if he’s thirsting for more. 

“Slide it in,” he instructs, waiting for you to follow his words. He’s taken aback when you swiftly grab a hold of his phone and dodge his attempt to grab it back. 

“Beg for it,” you smile sweetly as the image on him fills up his phone screen. 

“Please stick it in, I wanna feel you around me.” He lets out but the lack of desperation in his voice causes you to shake your head. 

You take a hold of his cheeks with your hand, forcing him to look directly into the camera you’re holding in front of him. Tilting your head to the side while moving your hips back and forth, you give him a disappointed, and exaggerated, sigh. 

“I bet Dr. Suh is used to people following his instructions, huh?” You taunt. “It must really annoy you when your wife isn’t one of them.” 

A wicked grin appears before he tries to take the phone from you once more, only for you to swiftly pull it back and away from him. When you push his chest back down, you bring the camera in his line of vision again.

“Come on, all you have to do is beg a little.” You giggle, dragging your thumb gently along his bottom lip before running it down the column of his throat. “I wanna hear how badly you want me.” 

In that moment, you see his eyes darken and he makes direct eye contact with his phone’s camera, knowing you’re looking at his screen. 

“Please let me fuck you,” he smirks. “Let me show you exactly who you belong to.” He pauses, bringing his hand up to the wrist of the hand you’re holding the phone in. He squeezes it slightly to prevent you from pulling away. “Let me fucking ruin you tonight, baby.”

His words ignite a fire in the pit of your stomach before he shoves his phone out of your hand and onto the other side of the bed. 

Snaking his hand behind your neck, he frantically pulls you down to his lips before delving his tongue into your mouth, rolling it over yours before taking your bottom lip between his teeth. 

“You want that, huh?” He speaks against your lips. “You want me to ruin you, over and over again.” 

You mindlessly nod your head, quickly submitting to his previous words without needing to say it again. You lift your hips to give you enough room to maneuver his tip against your entrance before sinking onto his shaft, your needy cunt swallowing him effortlessly while your walls quickly mold to his size as he whispers ‘good girl’ against your lips. 

He squeezes his hands against your hips, keeping you in place before lifting his hips to penetrate deeply into you — feeling his mushroom tip presses against your sweet spot.

You sit up, planting your palms against his warm chest with your fingers splayed out. Your nails leave crescent shaped indents as you dig them into him with every satisfying thrust.

His hands slide up your body and up to the sides of your neck and his thumb slips between your lips and against your tongue. Without being told, you begin sucking. 

With one hand still planted on your neck, he halts his thrusts. He swiftly uses the thumb you sucked on to circle against your aching clit.

“Look at me,” his voice deepens as he stares into your eyes, flickering between them. 

You’re squirming on top of him with the way his thumb works your ball of nerves. He taps the pad of his thumb against your clit, causing you to shudder and your velvety walls involuntarily pulse around his cock.

You try to muffle your noises with the way you’re pressing your lips together, only for a moan to slip out and opening the floodgates of noises he needs to hear from you. 

“Get loud,” he teases. “A noise complaint won’t hurt.” 

You press the palm of your hand against his mouth, silencing him. Just by the look in his eyes, you know it was a mistake. You feel him smirk against your palm right before his thumb picks up its pace. 

Just as he expected, you bite down on your bottom lip as you’re grinding on top of him. He feels your walls tighten before you slide your hand down to his chest, bracing yourself for your orgasm.

“You’re gonna cum, aren’t you?” He taunts and you rapidly nod your head. “That’s too bad, actually. No you’re not.” He chuckles as he continues to circle your clit, confusing you. “You’re not gonna cum until I get to number one. If you think about looking away, I’m starting over. If you cum before I get to one, I’m putting you on a sex ban.”

He begins counting backwards from 10. By the time he reaches 8, your nails are clawing into his chest. When he reaches 5, the muscles in your body begin to hurt from how hard you’re tensing up. By 4, your toes are curling, your calves burning, and your tears begin to brim your waterline. 

“3… 2…” he lingers before saying the last number until you let out a desperate wimper followed by a quiet ‘please’ to which he smiles. “1.” 

Within a second, you allow yourself to let go and have your orgasm hit you. You shut your eyes and whimpers spill out from your lips as your body freezes from the shockwaves that course through your body. His thumb doesn’t waver and he’s rubbing your swollen clit until you’re begging him to stop. 

You twitch upon his touch as his thumb taps against your overstimulated clit. A squeal is heard and you push his hand away from you, weakly pinning it against the mattress. Every muscle in your body relaxes and causes you to fall onto your husband’s chest. 

“You’re so mean,” you tiriedly laugh as Johnny slides his finger up and down your bare spine.

“But that tone tells me you enjoyed it,” he teases before bucking into you again, causing you to jerk upwards. “C’mon, you’re not done.” He taps your thigh before instructing you to get onto your stomach. 

Patting around the bed, he finds his phone and stops the previous recording before starting a new one. With your legs between his thighs, he gives your ass a nice, playful smack before placing the phone in your hand.

You hold his phone at arms length in front of you, ensuring both you and Johnny were in frame.

“Keep your eyes on the screen,” he grins before sliding himself into your entrance and your jaw drops at the sudden feeling of fullness. “Look away and I’m stopping, do you understand?”

You nod, looking at the screen like he instructed. Your eyes are glazed over and you see streaks of dried up tears against your face. He leans forward, caging you under him with his arms before his lips meet the shell of your ear, playfully tugging it between his teeth. 

“Use your words,” he whispers. 

“Yes, I understand.” you correct yourself, obediently.

“Yes what?” He smirks, looking at you through the screen before harshly thrusting into you. “Say my name.”

“Yes Johnny,” you whisper, jaw slacked open from his slow and hungry movements. Your eyes attempt to close, only for Johnny to remind you of his rules. 

“You want me to stop?” He questions harshly, almost in disbelief.

You quickly shake your head, looking at him through the phone screen. “I’m sorry,” you let out. “Please don’t stop. You give him a pout. “I promise I’ll follow your instructions.” 

Your begs cause him to grin against your cheek before planting a gentle kiss on your skin. Your eyes stay locked on Johnny who lifts himself to thrust into you. His hands push against your lower back and he uses you for his own pleasure.

His strokes are deep — harsh even — as if he’s taking out all his frustrations on your poor innocent cunt. His rough movements are accompanied by deep, guttural groans — almost animalistic and feral. 

His fingers dig into your hips, pulling you down his shaft as he penetrates into you, hitting your sensitive spot. You see his eyes lift to make sure you’re following the rules he placed upon you and to his surprise, you are — with your brows furrowed and your jaw dropped from the immense pleasure you’re feeling.

You’ve bunched up the sheets under your chin to bite on as he gives you his cock oh so well and in turn, it helps muffle your screams of pleasure so you’re not too loud. 

“Lift your hips,” he orders and you follow through. He slides his hand under you, placing itself between your thighs. Your eyes widen, already knowing what he’s about to do.

He leans forward again, placing open kisses against your shoulder and setting his lips against the back of head. Johnny’s skilled fingers circle around your overly sensitive, swollen, and aching clit and your hips twitch up and into him from the sensitivity. 

“You’re so pretty like this,” he coos. “So fucking pretty and all mine,” he mutters against your hair. “Don’t you think?” 

All you do is nod, mind filled with nothing but haze as you’re focused on the pleasure he’s giving you. 

“Say it.” You feel a devilish smile appear on his face. “Look in the camera and say who you belong to.”

You do as he says. “I’m yours.” You mumble.

“Uh uh,” he quietly and playfully scolds. “Say my name.”

“I’m Johnny’s.” Your cheeks flush with heat, embarrassed he’s making you talk as if someone else will be watching this video. 

“Good girl,” he growls, punctuating every word with a deep and harsh thrust. “I love making love to your pretty little cunt.” He groans. “It’s mine, isn’t it?”

“Y-yes.”

“I can use it however the fuck I want. You love when I fill you up, don’t you? You love when I mark you up from the inside with my cum, hm?” 

His obscene words cause your heart to skip a beat and your stomach flutters before the muscles in your stomach tightens, feeling a build up of pleasure. 

You rapidly nod your head at his words while your nails dig into the bed sheets that are already peeling off the corners of your mattress. 

“I love when you cum inside of me, Johnny.” You whine, allowing your jaw to fall open as his hips harshly thrust into you, slapping of skin filling the room. 

“Yeah?” He slyly chuckles. “What better way to show people you’re mine than to fuck my baby into my pretty wife?” He grins at the sight of you biting down on the bed sheets, your walls clenching around his shaft as you hear his words.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” you whine. “I’m gonna cum,” you warn as your eyes watch his hips slap against your ass, your skin rippling with every rough stroke.

Johnny’s finger maintains the pace on your clit while you tremble underneath him. “Cum for me, baby.” He whispers into your ear and just like the obedient wife you are, you’re cumming on his cock for the second time that night. You sob into your sheets, muffled cries of his name could be heard before your hand releases your grip on his phone.

He feels you tighten around him while he fucks you through your orgasm and your inner thighs begin to tremble from the intensity. Slowing his movements, he reaches over to grab his phone, holding it in front of you. 

“Look at how fucked out you look, sweetheart.” His voice drips with a hint of a condescending tone. He forces you to look at yourself when he takes a hold of your cheeks. “Beautiful, aren’t you?”

He forces your head up and down to nod before you give him a cockdrunk smile — eyes glazed over and your lips swollen and raw from how hard you’re biting down when you cum. 

“You’re not done yet, are you?” You question, turning your head to look at him. His lips are inches away from yours. 

“Not a chance,” he grins, allowing his phone to fall face front into the mattress. “Get on your back for me.” 

You do as he says before he pulls your legs to drag you to the edge of the bed where he’s standing. He dips his tip into your sopping cunt eagerly and you swallow him with ease, making it easier to bottom out into you. 

His thumb finds its way to your mouth again, watching you suck on it before letting your jaw hang open when you feel his cock’s tip bullying your g-spot. 

With every thrust, he jerks you up the bed. His movements earn him loud and obscene noises that part your lips before his large hands grip onto your shoulders. He pulls you down in tandem with every jerk of his hips. 

You place your hand against his stomach, attempting to slow his movements only to have him pin your hands against your mouth, muffling your noises. 

He pants as his hips rut back and forth before he chuckles to himself, watching your thighs tremble. His thumb finds your clit again, carefully circling it as he watches your reaction. It’s clear you’re still reeling from the stimulation caused by your second orgasm, but Johnny loves it.

“I think I have a better idea,” he huffs, halting his movements. 

He lowers his hands before opening the drawer of his bedside table. He pulls out your tiny battery powered vibrator. 

“My thumb might not be enough this time,” he smirks. “Tell me no if you don’t want me to use it.”

You stay silent and Johnny takes that as an okay to continue. He slowly begins thrusting his hips again.

“Let’s start off slow, hm?” 

You let out a tiny chuckle. “Going soft on me?” You taunt, wrapping your legs around his waist. “I’m surprised.”

He looks at you, amused by your words. “The highest it is, then.” 

Your eyes widen right before the intense vibrations pulse against your sensitive clit. You open your mouth to say something only for a moan to come out instead. 

“Cat got your tongue, baby?” He chuckles, erratically thrusting his hips into you.

“Ph-phone,” you manage to let out.

“You want me to record this?” Johnny smirks and you simply nod your head. He obliges, reaching over to grab his phone before starting a new recording. 

Slowly lifting your hand, you take a hold of his camera before taking over the recording. You aim the camera to where the vibrator is — watching him penetrate into you while dragging your vibrator up and down your wet slit, focusing on your swollen clit. 

Your hands are trembling as you’re watching him fuck you through the phone screen before you decide to end the recording and throw his phone to the side. 

He leans into your neck, sucking on your favorite spot while your orgasm creeps up. Your hand tries to lighten the pressure he has on your clit, only for Johnny to pin his free hand over yours when he pulls away from your neck. 

You tuck your bottom lip between your teeth and Johnny grins. “Is this gonna be your third orgasm, baby?” He asks, tilting his head to the side.

“Mhm,” you hum. “I’m so close.”

“Hold on, not yet.” He huffs before letting out a laugh. You know he’s going to start his countdown, painfully edging you. 

“Please,” you beg. “I can’t h-hold it for 10 seconds.”

“Yes you can,” he smiles at you sweetly. “Now you know the rules.” 

He begins counting down while he thrusts into you and you keep your eyes locked on his. By 7, your aching clit throbs — making you painfully aware of how desperately you need to cum. By 6, your visions begin to go hazy. When he reaches 4, your eyes begin to water from holding in your orgasm.

“3… 2…” he smirks. “…1.”

You scream out in pleasure as your orgasm hits you hard. Johnny doesn’t stop fucking you through your orgasm, but he does turn off your vibrator before cupping the sides of your face and giving you well deserved kisses against your lips.

“That’s my girl,” he praises. “Good job, I knew you could do it.” He softly chuckles, wiping away your tears with his thumbs before capturing your lips with his.

You feel every muscle in your body melt when you finally come down from your high. 

“Wrap your arms around me,” Johnny instructs. 

You do as he asks, wrapping your arms around his shoulders and keeping your legs around your waist. In one quick and swift move, you’re on top of him. 

“I’m close,” he whispers. “Let me take it from here.” 

You weakly nod your head as you rest against his chest. His tip pushes into your entrance once again, burying itself between your soaking walls. He thrusts his hips up and into you while you enjoy being used by your husband. His arms pin your body against him, keeping you as close to him as possible. 

“I’m gonna cum,” Johnny warns.

You muster the strength to sit yourself up and you grind your hips against him, helping him reach his high quickly. His hands grip your waist when he cums inside of you, letting out a strangled groan when you quickly jerk your hips back and forth, milking every drop from him. 

His tense body relaxes, telling you he’s emptied himself into your cunt. “C’mere,” he whispers, pulling you back down to his chest.

“Don’t pull it out yet,” you softly mumble as you peck kisses against his blushed chest. 

“I won’t,” he chuckles, wrapping his arm around your waist while the other cups the back of your head. “You okay? It was a little intense.” 

“I’m more than okay,” you giggle. “I’m still on cloud nine.” 

Johnny places a gentle, loving kiss against your forehead. His hand rubs circles against your lower back before rubbing your quivering thighs.

He shifts under you. “Give me a second to grab water,” he softly says and you slowly lift yourself off him. He returns with two plastic bottled waters and a container of prewashed green grapes. 

Your eyes light up when you see the container, both of you knowing how often you’ve been eating them these past couple of weeks. 

He cracks open the top of the water bottle and hands it to you, making sure you’re hydrated after your intense back to back orgasms. 

“Thank you,” you smile before drinking nearly half of the bottle in one go. You lift a grape and place it into your mouth, enjoying the sweetness when you chew.

Johnny mimics your movements before he looks at you. “You know I’ll take care of you and our child if we were to have kids, right?” He suddenly lets out. 

“I mean, you take care of me when we don’t have kids.” You grin, popping another grape into your mouth. “There’s no doubt in my mind you’ll extend that care to our child. Why are you suddenly bringing this up?”

“With the whole marking you from the inside and fucking my baby into you talk,” he shrugs. “I just wanna make sure you know.”

You lift your hand to comb through his disheveled hair. “Thank you,” you smile. “Like I said, there’s no doubt in my mind you’ll take care of us.”

He nods before suggesting to use the bathroom and to wash your bodies once more before bed. When you agree, you both step into the shower and quickly wash your bodies, ridding your body from the sweat that came with your intense love making session. 

Johnny quickly strips and replaces the bed sheets while you gather the leftovers from the night before for tonight’s dinner and his favorite snacks to further comfort him after the stressful day he’s had. 

Just as he’s done, you place the tray of food and snacks on the bed and you both excitedly hop into bed with you snuggled into his side as you watch a movie of his choice. He feeds you bites of his snacks after dinner while his thumb mindlessly brushes your waist from under your sleep shirt.

Once the movie ends, you attempt to throw away the packaging of his snacks you both finished. Your husband stops you, keeping you cuddled next to him. 

“Thank you for taking care of me after work today.”

“It’s no problem,” you yawn. “You do so much, it’s the least I can do.”  

Johnny doesn’t respond, but he squeezes you as he pulls you closer into his side.

“Is there anything you wanna talk about before we call it a night?”

You hear Johnny hum. 

Sitting up, you look at your husband who moves a strand of fallen hair from your face and tucking it behind your ear. He laces his fingers between yours as he holds it.

“Can we talk about the positive pregnancy test I saw in the bathroom trash this morning?”

[spoonfulofmilo]

The Bachelor Chapter 1

are y'all fucking ready???

also regardless of who you want to win, I would encourage you to read everything just cause a) I've put so much effort into this, b) you may find a new favourite to cheer for, and c) how can you vote for who to eliminate when you haven't read everything?

updates will be tues, wed and thursday my time at 7pm aest!

love y'all

the bachelor masterlist is here

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my masterlist can be accessed here

Please keep requesting - y'all have awesome ideas we agree on a lot of stuff :) - my guidelines are here, and if you want some prompts, they are here.

also feel free to come in and start chatting to me in my asks, would love to get to know y'all better

and if you want to be added to my taglist lmk :)

---

Y/N could hear the host’s voice droning on, but the words felt distant, muffled by the sound of his own breath, heavy and uneven.

“First time… Y/N Y/L/N… bisexual… here for one reason… to find the love of his life…”

He sucked in a breath, the weight of the cameras settling on his shoulders as the lights blazed to life.

“Hey, I’m Y/N. I’m 25, an F1 driver with Aston Martin, and I’m here to find… well, hopefully, the love of my life.”

He flicked his eyes toward the camera, his teeth pressing into his lip before he forced a smile.

“I think... I’m looking for someone who can deal with my chaotic schedule,” he said, voice steady, mostly, despite the way his fingers kept fidgeting in his lap.

“Someone who can spend time with me when I’m home... but is also okay with the fact that I’ll be gone most of the year”

“Um… I’m doing this during my winter break, so I still need to stay fit. But yeah, I’m up for pretty much anything!”

“Ideally, somewhere between 22 and 30. Maybe a little older, I’m open to it. I guess age isn’t really the biggest thing for me.” Y/N winks, then immediately laughs. “Wow, that... uh, that sounded weird.”

“Okay, this is... kind of weird to admit, especially since I think a lot of these contestants will be men, but... I also want someone who wants kids. I’m young, so it doesn’t have to be soon, especially with me being at the peak of my career... but I would like a little one running around the F1 paddock. I want a partner who’s okay with that, and who’s also down to explore those options, even if they’re a guy.”

“Whoa, that was... a lot to admit. Sorry if that got a little too deep.” He exhaled slowly, eyes fluttering shut as he tried to steady himself before moving on.

“As for past relationships… well, I’ve never really dated. Girls always thought I’d go for their brother, so they didn’t want to be seen with ‘the gay guy.’ Guys... thought I was a pervert, or assumed I was cheating on them with my motorsport mates. I... dated someone in my F2 years. He was everything I thought I wanted, until he wasn’t." 

Y/N’s voice caught, a lump forming in his throat. He swallowed hard before forcing himself to continue.

"Then I got the F1 seat, and he didn’t… and that’s when things changed. We started wanting different things, or maybe we always did. It was 3 years ago that I decided to end it. We’d been together for two years. Since then, I’ve had some casual hookups on apps like Raya... but honestly? I think I’m ready for something real. Something that lasts. I don’t care about sexuality. I don’t care what someone looks like. It’s not about gender or genitalia. It’s about the connection.” 

His hands twisted together at his waist, knuckles whitening. For a moment, he couldn't stop. Then, he forced himself to. His chest rose and fell in measured breaths, one, two, three. It felt more like gearing up for a race than introducing himself to millions of viewers. He could hear the producers in his earpiece, their voices sharp, telling him to stop. Look towards where the bachelor would appear. He took a deep breath, steeling himself, and followed the instructions. 

The red shirt clung to his chest, a few buttons undone in a bid to stay cool under the studio lights… though the warmth seeping into his skin wasn’t just from the lamps. It was the nerves crawling beneath his skin. He shifted on the balls of his feet, the soft leather of his shoes creaking beneath him, an uncomfortable reminder of how much he wanted to flee.

Contestant Number 1's Introduction Can Be Found Here

Contestant Number 2's Introduction Can Be Found Here

Contestant Number 3's Introduction Can Be Found Here

Contestant Number 4's Introduction Can Be Found Here

Contestant Number 5's Introduction Can Be Found Here

Contestant Number 6's Introduction Can Be Found Here

Contestant Number 7's Introduction Can Be Found Here

Contestant Number 8's Introduction Can Be Found Here

Contestant Number 9's Introduction Can Be Found Here

Contestant Number 10's Introduction Can Be Found Here

Contestant Number 11's Introduction Can Be Found Here

Contestant Number 12's Introduction Can Be Found Here

Contestant Number 13's Introduction Can Be Found Here

Contestant Number 14's Introduction Can Be Found Here

Contestant Number 15's Introduction Can Be Found Here

Contestant Number 16's Introduction Can Be Found Here

Contestant Number 17's Introduction Can Be Found Here

Contestant Number 18's Introduction Can Be Found Here

Contestant Number 19's Introduction Can Be Found Here

Contestant Number 20's Introduction Can Be Found Here

Contestant Number 21's Introduction Can Be Found Here

Contestant Number 22's Introduction Can Be Found Here

Contestant Number 23's Introduction Can Be Found Here

Contestant Number 24's Introduction Can Be Found Here

Contestant Number 25's Introduction Can Be Found Here

Poll #1 can be found here

Poll #2 can be found here (ideally you only vote in 1, but honestly can't blame you if you vote in both)

---

taglist: @barcelonaloverf1life, @leosxrealm, @tallrock35, @wolf-knights, @janeholt3, @badblondebisexualboy, @ghostking4m, @fate-posts, @evelyn-4034, @jupiter-je-taime, @redcrescentmoons, @youraveragebritishamerican, @v3lnys, @thatonesblog, @bangbangdevotee, @annegrey, @pear-1206, @alchemxx, @koalapastries, @saucy-apples, @milessunflowers, @dramaticpiratellamas, @bunnisgreen,

[uravitypng]

𝗧𝗢𝗚𝗘𝗧𝗛𝗘𝗥 𝗙𝗢𝗥𝗘𝗩𝗘𝗥

pairing: kei tsukishima x (chubby) reader, tadashi yamaguchi x (chubby) reader

summary: nothing could ever split you and your best friends apart

word count: 1.6k words

a/n: this is complete fluff! i adore them! originally it wasn't meant to be under a cut but i decided it was too long to not be. this has been on my mind for about a couple months and has been in my drafts for about a week or two now. even though this isn't smut my blog is 18+ and that includes this post to, mdni

best friends tsukki and tadashi who absolutely love you but tsukishima won't tell you that, he won't even admit it to himself. yamaguchi is more honest with his feelings, he doesn't deny his own feelings and is open in his words, telling you how he cares about you, calling you affectionate nicknames and giving you compliments.

"have you had dinner yet honey?" yamaguchi questions.

"huh? oh.. um... yeah..." you haven't. you haven't had lunch either, work was hectic and you were planning on having something but nothing was microwavable and you've run out of cereal and bread, so you can't make toast, too.

at your answer your two best friends pause what they were doing. it's a tuesday night and you're planning on watching a documentary that's just come onto netflix that kei's been talking about. you have a blanket in one hand and a pillow in the other, ready to cosy up on the sofa, tadashi's making himself a coffee in the kitchen and tsukki's in the hallway, when they hear you they pause and make there way to you, supporting matching frowns. they can tell by your response that you're lying, plus the fact that you likely didn't eat anything at lunch either, they hope you ate at breakfast.

"that doesn't really sound believable hon," yamaguchi tells you.

"yeah cut the shit," tsukishima adds on.

"i-um, the boss was really on my case today so i didn't have time to eat on my break and i was planning on eating when i got home before you guys came, i was going to get something easy that isn't a lot of effort but i don't have anything in. i'll have to go shopping tomorrow."

"idiot," kei says under his breath and walks past you, sitting on the sofa and unlocking his phone.

tadashi moves behind you and holds your shoulders gently pushing you to follow tsukishima. "you know you need to eat." he moves you to join tsukki on the sofa and squeezes your shoulder before going back into the kitchen to fetch his coffee and join you both.

tsukishima's flicking down his phone, the light reflecting of his glasses, "you want me to order from that pizza place down the street or do you want sushi?"

it's a weekend, one of the very rare weekends when peoples schedules are free, four on the team. hinata, kageyama and kei and tadashi.

currently your best friends are being questioned by hinata about their feelings for you. complete denial from tsukishima, "what?! what are you talking about pipsqueak, there's nothing going on between us. like i would ever like her! yamaguchi tell him!"

yamaguchi looks at tsukishima to hinata, then back again at tsukishima, "what am i telling him tsukki?"

"are you fucking kidding me yamaguchi! tell him that i'm not in love with her or that you're not in love with her. tell her that she's not dating one of us!"

"ohhh-" tadashi nods his head, "hinata, tsukki always says that he doesn't feel that way. koganegawa asked something similar before and afterwards koganegawa told me that during training that day tsukki's blocks had a hundreds time more power than normal and it was really intimating."

"what about you then yamaguchi?"

"oh it's-" he's cut off as his phone rings. "sorry, i should get this." after a minute he hangs up and puts his phone in his back pocket, "i need to go guys, that was the hospital."

tsukishima quickly stands up, yamaguchi is on two people's contact list his and... 'oh fuck,' kei panics. "is she okay?!"

"yeah it's just a sprain, she twisted her ankle but they called to have someone pick her up. she can't drive and it's best not to take public transport right away."

"let's go then." tsukishima grabs his car keys and wallet that was on the table.

they have been looking after you since you've met them, and it's clear to yamaguchi that kei feels the same way he does even if he'll never voice it, that's one of main reasons why yamaguchi would never ask you out.

it's clear to yamaguchi, like, for instance right now, as kei's driving to pick you up after your accident, silent with a worried look on his face, it's clear to yamaguchi how much tsukki cares. how tsukki refers to you as 'shortcake,' he doesn't think you've ever made the connection that he calls you his favourite food. he doesn't eat much, hardly anything really, but shortcake? he has cravings.

they've been your best friends since school, and have been calling you nicknames since then too.

you're pouting with your arms crossed while the three of you study together, it's your second year at karasuno and exams were coming up. kei and tadashi are in a different class than you, both of them are in class 2-4, it was annoying that you weren't in their class. not only were they in the best class but they were the best of the class so they helped you with studying a lot of time. tsukishima was always reluctant, saying he had better things to do but he still always turned up at tadashi's house for study sessions. you tapped your pen frustrated at the question you were stuck on, that's when kei asked do you need him to explain it and tadashi asked if you were okay.

"are you really stuck on these? they're easy." both of you glare at tsukishima. he leans over to you, "which one? i'll talk you through it."

"do you really want to listen to tsukki honey? i'm better at japanese."

"yeah but you're terrible at english." tsukishima smirks at him. you weren't even planning to revise english for a couple more weeks.

all that night he kept replaying that conversation, he kept replaying how yamaguchi called you honey. a little while after that he started to call you shortcake.

all three of you were walking home together from school one night when kei called you shortcake again, you stopped on the spot and turned to look at them, pouting with your arms crossed. "what's with both of you calling me food petnames? honey? shortcake? if i was someone else i think i would be offended, just because someone's not thin and on the thicker side you shouldn't call them food names. i know i like food but still!" tsukishima started calling you it more, you looked cute with that pout on your face pretending not to like the names. after he realises he called you cute in his head, he puts in his earbuds and blasts his music as loud as possible. you rolled your eyes at the action, 'yams can we stop of at the shops? i don't want to admit it but i really want some shortcake now' you ask him and yamaguchi snickers.

you all attend a party together after your ankle is fully healed, it's someone's birthday. both you and yamaguchi are lightweights and tsukishima's well aware that by the end of the night he'll most likely be looking after the two of you. yamaguchi isn't drunk yet, however you are, leaning against and wrapping you arms around his neck. "yams," you whine in a tone to get his attention however that was pointless because all of his attention was already focused on you when you pressed your soft plump body up against him, "you're so cute! your freckles are so pretty! you're so pretty 'dashi."

yamaguchi smiles wide and pats your head, you giggle. "you're even cuter."

your walk is almost a stumble as you go to tsukishima. kei can tell something is wrong when he spots you walking towards you, you have a frown on your face and your movement is wobbly. "what's up with you?" he asks you as soon as you get close enough.

"nothing!" you snap, turning your head to the side. it's a surprise that you're not shooting daggers at the girl who's standing a bit too close to your best friend in your opinion. "who's this?" you ask, your words are slightly slurred but sound almost detached and cold.

"ume, she's the sister of one of the sendai frogs," tsukishima replies.

"oh?" 'so not a girlfriend, just a sister?' you grab hold of kei's arm. he's not really one for physical affection but he lets you get away with it, especially when drunk. "kei's my best friend! you can't have him!" tsukishima smirks, knowing that your attempts at looking menacingly and glaring are completely unsuccessful.

ume's eyes widen, with a small smile on her face she says over the music that sounds like she mumbles, "alright, i'll go find my brother."

when her back is turned you stick out your tongue and tsukki sniggers. "you alright now shortcake?" he smirks. "you do know that other people have to talk to me. you can't just keep me stopping on talking to people shortcake."

you look at him in the eye and pout, "'m not doing that. you have tadashi too!" tsukishima chuckles. "it's us three forever tsukki, nothing's gonna change that."

tsukishima's eyes shine with fondness and longing as they drift over to where yamaguchi is, currently laughing at kageyama's scrunched up face as he attempts to down a drink. knowing you'll be too drunk to remember this by tomorrow, he drinks the rest of his whiskey that he was currently nursing and he walks the short distance towards the chairs knowing that you won't let go of his arm and pulls you down on his lap, facing him. the chair is lumpy and uncomfy but it's one hundred percent worth it to have you on top of him. your eyes are a bit glazed over and you look at him dazed, he clasps both his hands in yours. "you're right about that shortcake, us three forever."

[baseonezero]

miniskirt - leehan

pairing. leehan x fem!reader | synopsis. you wear a cute outfit out but you get too much attention from your boyfriend's friends | warnings. smut (mdni), vaping (thc), perv!jaehyun & riwoo kinda, jealousy, hair pulling, name calling, unprotected sex, public sex-ish??? | an. kind of a leehan addict :p

while getting ready, you already had an outfit in mind and you decided you were finally going to wear the miniskirt you had bought weeks ago. you already paid for it so you might as well wear it out!

all dolled up, you walked into the living room to find your boyfriend sat on the couch, a disposable pen in one hand and his phone in the other, lazily scrolling through it.

"is jaehyun almost here?" you asked, walking over to the couch.

his eyes looked up from the screen and fell onto you, looking you up and down. he whistled at you, his lips turning into a smirk. "yeah, but i might just tell him to hangout without us."

"pfft, yeah 'cause i spent two hours getting ready just to stay home," you retorted, taking the pen from his hand and taking a hit from it.

his eyebrow quirked as he watched the vapor flow out from your mouth, the scent of strawberry filling the air. "it wouldn't be just staying home. anyway, you look really good, just in case i didn't make it obvious enough." he shut his phone off, sliding it into his pocket before standing up and stepping closer to you.

"you think so?" you asked with a hint of flirtation as you looked into his eyes, taking the tip of the vape between your lips.

"you really trying to play this game right now?" he whispered, inching his face closer to yours.

beeeeep beep beep

"looks like our ride is here," you smiled, making your way out the front door and to the black car.

riwoo's window was down, his arm hanging out. "woahh, now where are you going?" he asked, jaehyun moving his head to look past riwoo, his eyebrows rising for a second. "well, dayum."

you could help but to laugh at them, opening the door to the backseat of the car. "can a girl get all cute without getting questioned?" you scoffed, looking out to see leehan walking to the car, nodding at his friends before getting in the backseat with you, shutting the car door.

"you guys just cockblocked me," leehan mumbled as he put on his seatbelt as jaehyun began to drive.

"dude" you glared at him.

"did she just 'dude' you?" jaehyun looked over at the two of you through the rear-view mirror, cracking up as riwoo looked back over the seat.

leehan scoffed, crossing his arms.

"whatcha got there? let me see," riwoo reached over to your hand and took the small device from it, observing it from different angles. "'strawberry cough' huh?" he shrugged, deciding to take a hit of it.

"isn't it good?" you asked, watching as he gave a nod of approval.

"i might have to keep this. is it yours?" he asked in return, looking back at you with it in hand.

"it's mine. unless you wanna buy it off of me," leehan huffed, staring him down.

"i'll just buy my own." riwoo turned back to face the front, taking yet another hit from the pen.

"wait— hand it over," jaehyun held his hand out, glancing at riwoo for a second before looking back over at the road.

he did as told and jaehyun took a deep inhale, handing it back to the passenger as he blew out the smoke, letting out a few small coughs afterwards. "i might just buy that off of you," he smiled.

somehow, by the time you all had arrived at the arcade, riwoo was beyond faded. his eyes were now red and droopy. of course, jaehyun took the opportunity to laugh at him and riwoo could only laugh along with him.

walking into the building was a little annoying as the skirt kept riding up. you pulled it down to its place but was still higher than mid thigh but hey, at least you looked good and it showed off your assets.

leehan noticed this, and he took your hand into his. "do you maybe want to wear my flannel?" he asked, though it was more of a suggestion.

you shook your head. "i'm okay."

"i just don't want you to be uncomfortable," he pushed up his black frames with his finger, glancing over at you.

"'m not too worried because i have you around," you assured, squeezing his fingers for a second.

from behind, you heard jaehyun fake a gag. "get a room," he booed.

normally, riwoo would've chimed in, but instead he was too busy looking around the place. "so fucking cool.." he whispered to himself, eyeing all the various types of machines and the small section where people could go bowling.

both pairs walked up to a machine to get cards to play with, paying to get a enough credits to play for most of the night. riwoo and jaehyun would share a card, and you would obviously share one with your boyfriend — though you thought about how it'd be a little annoying to keep having to ask each other for the card.

throughout the night, leehan would catch onto the stares his friends would give you while you weren't looking, too busy playing a game on a machine.

this wasn't your fault, but theirs, yet he couldn't help but feel like this is what you wanted.

at one point, leehan had gone to go get a drink for you and you had decided to stay with riwoo and jaehyun.

being the sly guy that he is, jaehyun had asked riwoo to record both you and him on the motorcycle racing machine from his phone.

riwoo stood behind you two, both in frame, but mostly focusing in on how your panties were now visible with the position you were in. hell, even while high, riwoo was perfectly well aware of what jaehyun was up to and he did not mind to be apart of the plan.

unfortunately for you, you were unaware that your panties were being exposed and leehan had come back just in time to catch the scene.

he stood next to riwoo before snatching jaehyun's phone from him, stopping the recording to which riwoo just stared, not caring enough to do anything. and weirdly enough, leehan simply waited for you and jaehyun to finish the game.

once you both got off, jaehyun's eyes met leehan's and he knew something was about to go down.

"fuck.. was my ass out?" you asked, mostly to yourself as you adjusted your skirt before looking up and seeing leehan, your drink in hand and a phone in the other.

"i'll take that back," jaehyun wore a smug grin as he took his phone from leehan which only pissed him off some more and you noticed how his jaw clenched.

"take this too." your boyfriend handed his friend what was supposed to be your drink before reaching over for your wrist. "we'll be back."

as you were basically getting dragged, you glanced back to see riwoo and jaehyun exchanging knowing looks before you turned your attention back to an angry leehan. "now what is your problem?" you asked, feeling slightly annoyed at his behavior.

"what is my problem?" he scoffed, pulling you into the unisex bathroom where he shuts the door and locks it behind him. "did you purposely wear that skirt today so they could eye fuck you?" he snarled while his grip on your wrist tightened.

"ow— what? no?!" you winced, trying to pry his grip off of your wrist. "i wore this because i haven't had any other chance to."

the corner of his lips lifted into a smirk. "yeah, you couldn't have worn it any other time that we have gone out, right?" his face drew closer to yours, his eyes darkening with every inch.

you opened your mouth to talk back but before you could even say anything, his lips were already on yours, his hands landing onto your ass.

his fingers found their way to the bottom hem of your skirt, rolling it up for him to give your cheeks a squeeze as he slipped his tongue into your mouth.

you couldn't help but moan into his mouth at his groping, just to find yourself sucking on his tongue.

he pulled away, eyeing the string of saliva attaching your mouths before licking it away. "is this what you wanted? hm?" he hummed, pushing you against the sink.

you felt gross as your skin touched the sink, the public bathroom being arguably one of the most unhygienic places ever but you also weren't going to stop him.

"can i just wear something hot without having you bitch at me?" you hissed, trying to scoot your skirt back down.

"dress like a whore and you'll deal with the consequences," he leaned into your ear and whispered, slapping your hands away as his snaked down to your clothed core. "oh.. and she's dripping." his fingers tapped on the wet, sticky patch, feeling amused by your body's reaction.

your breath hitched at the sudden attention, feeling a warmth spread throughout you. "leehan.." you whined, your hips pressing down into his hand.

leehan's free hand quickly undid his jeans as his other fingers rubbed against the dirtied fabric. "look at you acting like the slut that you are."

without warning, he turned you around so you could face the mirror as he shoved his pants and briefs down just enough to free him from his constraints.

"you're gonna watch how you look while you take me," he huffed, using the tip of his cock to slide your panties to the side, letting it coat with your juices. "bet that'll turn you on even more too."

you put your head down, too embarrassed to even look at the reflection and that certainly didn't make him happy.

"chin up, baby." his hand gripped your jaw as he tilted it up, making you watch before he slammed himself into you.

a yelp fell past your lips as your jaw dropped, feeling a sting from being forcefully stretched out while your hands held onto the sides of the sink. "waitdontmove," you sighed, wanting to adjust before he could do anything.

in the mirror, you saw how smirked, pushing his glasses up by the middle. "we have all the time in the world," he leaned down and kissed all over your neck, sucking softly on some spots.

contrary to his words, leehan couldn't help but to start rolling his hips into you, sighing at the way your warm gummy walls felt around his cock all while watching your expressions in the mirror.

his hand grabbed a fistful of your hair, turning it into a makeshift ponytail to pull your head up. "watch."

you finally looked at yourself and felt slightly embarrassed by the view. your jaw hanging open as moans slipped out from your mouth, eyebrows furrowed with the way he fucked deep into your cunt.

your bottom lip was captured between your lips as a pretty blush tinted your cheeks.

he let go of your hair and his hands pulled down at your tube top, letting your tits spill out. "no bra either.." he licked his lips, his hands fondling with your boobs. "fuck.. you really did want this."

you couldn't even form a proper sentence, just nodding at whatever he had to say as you pushed yourself back against him, loving the way his cock abused your hole.

he breathed out a small laugh. "so fucking greedy for me," his voice was low which only made you moan.

his hands let go of your tits and moved down to your hips, pulling himself out almost all the way before ramming himself into you.

he groaned, this time biting down on his own lip as he repeated the action.

your eyes rolled back, feeling a knot form in your tummy and as if his dick wasn't enough, he reached over and started rubbing at your clit.

the stimulation was too much and you felt as if you wouldn't be able to stop yourself from cumming if he kept at it.

"i'm gonna cum..." you whined between moans, your tits bouncing with each of his thrusts.

"oh yeah? cum all over this dick, baby," he encouraged and used your words as his own encouragement to fuck into your cunt and circle your clit even faster.

before you could even process his words, you became undone around him and a string of moans filled the small space.

"god," he dragged as he kept thrusting into you even after your climax.

not too long after, he pulled himself out and jerked himself a few times before shooting his cum all over your thighs and ass, moaning your name.

you held the sink to keep yourself balanced as he took deep breaths, fixing his briefs and jeans.

"mind helping me out a little?" you asked, looking back at him while pulling your top up with one hand.

"right.."

riwoo and jaehyun had moved to play skee-ball and when leehan made his presence known, they both eyed you two and then looked at each other.

jaehyun took a hit from leehan's pen that he had held onto, blowing out a small cloud into the air. "you two took a while," he smirked.

your cheeks blushed as you pressed your lips together, feeling shy and exposed.

"are we even allowed to smoke in here?" leehan changed the topic.

"you guys are freaks," riwoo switched the topic back, grinning before turning back the skee-ball machine, trying underhand throws to perfect his aim, "but i can't judge you 'cause i would too."

[studiogrimm810]

Midnight Coffee

// Est. Sam Winchester x you

summary: it's late and you can't sleep. at least you're home with sam // ~900 // base content: avoiding sleep, nightmares, sweet and loving sam

A/N: posting this (my first drabble!!) early to make sure i've fixed the glitches in my posts, sorry if this gets deleted :( if so, it means that i have NOT fixed the issue lolol :/

A symphony of insects buzzed in the dense woods just behind your home. It was a crisp summer night, about two in the morning, and you had been completely unable to fall asleep so you came out to the porch for some fresh air. Your porch. The thought alone makes you smile.

You and Sam had moved on from hunting and settled down in this small, cozy home on the outskirts of Lebanon. It has been a few months since you made the move and every day it still feels like a dream that you’re afraid to wake up from.

Dean and Cas visit often, but they decided to stay at the bunker for a little while longer, enjoying the home they found in it from the very beginning, but you and Sam craved a simpler life of a white-picket fenced home with a garden and porch swing to live in in peace.

However, when leaving the bunker and dropping that life behind, you found that the darkness still followed you. PTSD, you accepted from your therapist's diagnosis, haunted you even in this perfect slice of Heaven on Earth. It tainted your sleep and coated your everyday under a nasty goo that dampened the joy you almost had with your new life.

It’s not that you don’t feel that joy still, but you were so broken by your lifetime of loneliness and misery that you couldn’t exactly just leave that behind the steel, 10-inch thick doors of the bunker.

So here you sat, in your favorite spot of the house, the porch swing that Sam installed just for you, for nights like these. You didn’t have it in you to wake Sam up, you never could when it came to restless sleep or taunting nightmares, so you quietly slipped out with a blanket from the living room and settled into the creaky swing to hopefully distance yourself.

But, of course, Sam is Sam and he noticed your absence shortly and has learned that if you’re not in bed, then you’re most likely right where you are now.

“Hey,” he hums before opening the screen door. He tried to announce his presence subtly but you were still startled at his voice. You whipped around in time to watch him push open the door and step out, sleepy eyes drinking you up. “Can’t sleep?” He comes over and sits on the opposite end of the bench, lifting your legs to place them in his lap. His hands mindlessly run up your limbs, soft skin warming under his touch.

“M-mm,” you shake your head, resting it back into the padding of the bench and looking up into the night sky.

“You could’ve woke me up,” he reminds, resting his head back into the bench as well to level with you, looking right at you and cementing your features back into his memory, again. He can’t help himself, he has to memorize you just in case. It’s his own haunting of PTSD.

“I know,” you murmur, meeting his gaze. He looks tired and  you feel bad that your absence woke him up and forced him out of bed. You know he wouldn’t want you to feel that way at all, you just can’t help yourself.

“Do you want to talk about it?” He asks with a slight squint, knowing it’s a difficult water to tread.

“It’s Hell,” you state simply. Of course, you’ve been stamped with the hunter badge of honor for dying and coming back with a drizzle of Hell during your mortem. His stomach sinks because he knows how stalling that can be for a person, and he hates to be reminded that you, as warm, kind, loving, and pure as you were, still suffered at the expense of The Life.

He just nods, massaging his fingers into the meat of your calf, mixing his moves into your feet and sending warm chills up your back. Your eyes close as you relish the pleasure.

It’s quiet for a while as he continues to slowly work up your legs, keeping steady pressure as he aims to keep you as relaxed as he can. He wants to talk, simple conversation that never got boring with you, but he understands the cloud of trauma that keeps your tongue bit back and words impossible to form.

So instead, he thinks of a simple offer, “coffee?”

Your eyes, reopened and focused back onto the glittered night sky, drift back over to him and a small smile lifts your lips.

“Yes, please.”

His hands move back up your legs, gripping softly at your hips, as he leans down to press a chaste kiss to your thigh before he stands back up again.

“Anything, my love,” he settles the blanket back over your legs, tucking it snug around your frame, and leans down to kiss your temple, hesitating against your skin for a moment to inhale your fruity shampoo.

You watch him disappear back into your home, and he opens the kitchen window so you can hear him work and smell the freshly grinding beans.

This is the life you were destined to have. Even if the shadows hold echoes of your troubled past, fresh coffee on a homey night to keep the dreams at bay is all you could’ve hoped for, especially since the one handing you the mug was your beloved, Sam Winchester.

thank you so much for reading!! <3

>>check out my other works here

tags: @blossomingorchids @areswasneverhere @bejeweledinterludes @funkenniffler @iamaslytherin0

[mikimakiboo]

Mermay day 7 - Batten Down The Hatches

The Leviathans protecting their mates >>>

This trope will come back soon, be prepared

- Megalodontale -

A whaler ship attacked the shiver, Nightmare isn't happy with that and decides it is time to get big.

First

Prev

Next

- You're okay there ? Think you can stay alone for a bit ? Horror asked.

Nightmare huffed from the rock he was clinging to, looking up at the giant shark. Dust and Horror were on hunting duty and Nightmare came with them, wanting to find some clams, crabs, and maybe some starfish too. He couldn't hunt with them, but he could hunt for his brother and himself as their preys were a bit too small for the megalodons to catch without crushing them.

- I'm not a kid, I can stay on my own ! He argued.

Dust chuckled.

- You're pretty much baby size to us.

- I'm not baby size, ya'll just big as fuck, Nightmare growled.

- Sure, if you say so, Dust shrugged.

Horror sighed, shaking his head though still amused by his mates' playfighting. The only playfight they could do with their tiny mates as their big forms took a lot of energy and therefore weren't used that often.

- Enough fighting you two, Dust hurry up, the whales are gonna leave if we wait.

- Yeah yeah, I'm coming, Dust yawned, taking the lead.

Horror looked at Nightmare one last time, making sure the little octopus was good before following the white tip shark to where the whales were. They only needed to catch one to feed everyone, but since they were as big as them, it was better if they were two to catch and bring back the prey to the nest.

Both got into position, circling the group and gradually inserting themselves between the cetaceans to redirect one in the open. Horror stayed back, ensuring no other whale followed as Dust leaded the prey away, back to where Nightmare was to be closer when they would have to go home.

The great white joined his mate after a few seconds, smiling with satisfaction.

- Do you wanna have the honor of killing it ? Horror asked Dust.

The white tip smiled too, already preparing his claws.

- Don't mind me if I do- 

He was brutally cut in his sentence by a harpoon flying in front of his face, barely missing him. Both sharks looked at each other, frozen, where did that come from ? They had never seen such a big harpoons before, small ones yes, but never big like that. Horror slowly looked in the direction it came from: the surface, where he could distinguish a big dark form.

- It's.. a ship that launched that... ?

Since when could ships throw such big weapons ? Horror looked down at his mate again, they needed to go back to the nest quickly. He was about to warn him when a sudden sharp pain pierced through his shoulder.

- Horror ! Dust yelled, rushing to his side and completely forgetting the whale, oh fuck ! We need to get you to the nest !

Horror's breath fastened, he brought a shaky hand to his shoulder, Dust was already holding him, his blue cape progressively becoming red with the cloud of blood in the water. A second harpoon had been launched, and it hit his mark.

- Forget the whale we need to go ! Dust pushed him aside.

Both sharks started to swim, Horror being inconveniently slower due to his shoulder. Dust kept looking up, afraid of a third blow, but instead of feeling a harpoon they felt the water vibrate, agitate, and a low grumble was heard.

They stopped, what was happening now ? The water was darkening, clouds of sand and dirt were emerging from the depths and they could feel the waves getting bigger, more threatening, the surface lighting up before thunder was heard. They really didn't need a storm now.

- Hold on to me, do not let go. Dust ordered, pressing himself against Horror's good side to support him.

- We need to get Nightmare.. !

As he protested, a big glowing cyan light appeared in the dark water, making a massive black form the only thing distinguishable. The megalodons stared in shock as tentacles as large as cruise ships  emerged from underneath the form, one of them wrapping itself around the two sharks to move them out of the way as Nightmare, the Leviathan of the Moon in all of his glory, left the abyss.

The tentacle gently squeezed the sharks, a gentleness contrasting vividly with the violence of the storm outside, thunder was rambling and lightnings were seen from under the water. The Kraken's tentacles flew, slamming against the boat, tearing it in half and swinging it in the air, the useless harpoons falling in the water and the Leviathan's sharp teeth closing on the land walkers falling from the dismantled ship. They didn't stand a single chance.

Once emptied of any life, the remains of the boat fell in the water, sinking in the depths to be forgotten and left for the fish.

The storm didn't calm down, and Nightmare dived back into the sea. The tentacle holding the sharks loosened, letting Dust get out of the grip before tightening again around Horror, the great white barely holding on consciousness at this point.

None talked, but words weren't needed as Dust took the lead, bringing the Leviathan and his mate back to the nest. Horror needed urgent healing, they would come back without preys, but it wasn't important for now, Dust could go back hunting later with Cross and Killer. Horror's safety was more important.

It wasn't often that Nightmare was in his big form, but when he was, he had a good reason to be, and you needed to batten down the hatches and hide away, because an unstoppable force was about to strike, and the Kraken never missed his mark...

[klonnieshippersclub]

Sisterly Sabotage

Apologies for the late post, but I couldn’t resist jumping in for Klonnie Weekend — today's prompt is Matchmaker! Rebekah’s had it with her overbearing brother and decides to play cupid just to get Klaus out of her hair.

Bonnie knocked on the heavy front door of the Mikaelson mansion, already regretting this entire arrangement.

It swung open a second later.

Klaus stood in the doorway, blue eyes raking her in. “Well. This is unexpected.”

“Hi…” she said tightly. “Is Rebekah here?”

“No,” he replied, unbothered. “She’s not.”

Bonnie's brows pinched. “She begged me to meet her here. Promised me my ancestor’s belongings. I literally rearranged my day.”

He gestured her inside like he owned every square inch of her time. “You can wait for her in the living room. I’ll pour you a glass of wine.”

“No thanks,” she said, already turning to leave.

“I know where Rebekah was keeping Ayana’s heirlooms.”

Bonnie froze. Then, with a sigh and a side-eye sharp enough to slice him open, she stepped inside. “Fine.”

--

Upstairs

Rebekah lounged on a chaise, sipping from a champagne flute while a young witch traced a charm in the air beside her.

“Why her again?” the witch asked, glancing down at the two downstairs.

Rebekah smirked. “Because I’m tired of his brooding and endless monologues about art and betrayal. Caroline’s too self-obsessed. Elena’s too tragic. Bonnie? She has a spine. He’ll either implode or imprint.”

The witch blinked. “And you want…?”

“A little peace,” Rebekah muttered. “Maybe a quiet month without my psychotic brother inserting himself into my love life, my travels, my wardrobe, and my bank account. Now, darling—cue the snow.”

--

Downstairs

Bonnie stood by the window, watching the blizzard thicken with unnatural speed. “That’s not normal.”

Klaus appeared beside her, hands in his pockets, amused. “You can’t drive home in this storm.”

“It’s not a far drive.”

“The roads are already iced. Dangerous, even for a Bennett witch.”

“I could cast a spell to clear the path.”

He leaned forward invitingly with a warm look in his eyes. “Or we could have dinner. It’s just a storm.”

She glanced at him, unimpressed. “You’d probably poison me.”

“I would never do such a thing,” Klaus said, too smoothly. “I prefer tearing hearts out directly.”

Bonnie rolled her eyes. “And that’s my cue to leave.”

“Stay,” he said with a shrug, opening the fridge. “We’ve got some refreshing O-negative… or,” he paused, cracking open the freezer, “Rebekah keeps salted caramel ice cream.”

Bonnie looked mildly interested despite herself. “Skipping dinner and going straight to dessert?”

He passed her the pint with two spoons. “Why wait to taste the most delectable things?”

Bonnie took a bite. She moaned—soft, involuntary. “Okay. I hate that this is actually good.”

“You missed some,” Klaus said, stepping closer.

His thumb brushed the corner of her mouth, then his lips followed, warm and deliberate.

Bonnie narrowed her eyes at him. “That was a bold move for someone I could burn alive from the inside.”

“I live for danger,” Klaus murmured.

She licked her spoon with an exaggerated slowness. “Is it bravery or foolishness?”

"A little of both." He leans in to steal another kiss.

Bonnie glared at the cocky Original in front of her. “Don’t get cute. I still don’t like you.”

He grinned. “Not yet.

Upstairs, Rebekah peeked again, groaned, and waved the witch away. “Honestly, I just wanted him off my back. I didn’t mean to create actual chemistry.”

The witch raised an eyebrow. “You picked a Bennett. You knew what would happen.”

“Yeah,” Rebekah muttered, retreating into her room, “That’s the problem.”

[gds-daisy]

List 1, #18 “You look so good with my hands around your neck” and GD please. Thank you! 🫶🏼

glory box

You had just flown home after finishing the last leg of your world tour and could not wait to step foot into your penthouse. To your surprise, your best friend Jiyong had thrown you a surprise party and invited all of your closest friends.

Coincidentally, you just so happened to be wearing the skimpiest clothing imaginable. In front of Jiyong. As soon as the party officially started, you made your way around the house thanking everyone who had managed to show up. Everything was going well until you started conversing with your guys’ mutual friend, Chan-Yeol. Unbeknownst to you, Jiyong had become furious once he saw the two of you exchanging harmless words to one another. He hated it and the rage in his eyes only confirmed it even more. You were his, even if the two of you weren’t a thing.

He decided to take matters into his own hands and stormed outside, intending to walk over to the two of you and stop anything else from happening between you and Chan-Yeol. Once he finally made his way over to you, he cleared his throat, which startled you.

“Hi Ji! It’s so nice to see you,” you said with an illuminating smile plastered on your face.

“I need to talk to you alone. Now beat it Chan, ”he says, not even trying to hide the harsh nature of his words.

“Whatever dude,” Chan-Yeol says before walking away to get a drink.

“What was that Ji?!“ you ask in a scolding voice.

“He was getting a little too close to you for my liking,” Jiyong says coldly.

“You don’t get to decide who I can and can’t talk to! You don’t own me!” you say in a fit of anger.

“You can deny it all you want, but you know deep down that I do own you.”

And boy was he right. I mean how else would you have ended up being fucked on your bed?

“Such a fucking little brat, huh? Had to throw a damn temper tantrum at your own party, didn’t you? Remember it was my idea to have this party?” he grunts while plowing himself deeper into your aching hole.

“Fuck Ji…” you cry out as you feel his fat cock stretch you out ever so deliciously.

“Poor baby…already so drunk on her best friend's cock,” he tuts in fake disapproval.

He had managed to make a girl like you lose composure with only a few thrusts. You would be lying if you said you never dreamed of this. Him doing this to you. He wanted to ruin you, so that no other man could have you.

“No one else can fulfill your deepest desires like I can. That’s why you need me,” he says full of lust. “You belong to me.”

“Please…need more…” you plead, tears now spilling from your eyes. You could feel every inch of him, but yet it still wasn't enough for you.

“Greedy girl, aren’t you, jagi?” he asks, already knowing the answer you would give him.

“Only for you,” you reply in a choked sob, tears finally streaming down your cheeks from how he was splitting you open. It was enough to have your toes curling in ecstasy.

“Lemme see those pretty tears, baby,” he says before bringing his tattooed hand to your face to wipe them even further down your cheeks. You feel his tight balls slap against the curve of your ass, which provides some much-needed friction. Without warning, he loosely wraps his hands around your neck, not enough to hurt, but definitely enough to make you arch into the mattress.

“You look so good with my hands around your neck," he says, his voice dripping with arrogance while continuing to pound into you with his fat cock.

You loved seeing this side of him, even if you never admitted it to him. He was always protective of you even when you didn't ask him to be. It was the hottest thing ever to you.

"Should've done this a lot sooner...fucking hell, jagi," he says in between grunts while also emphasizing each syllable. Suddenly, he surprises you by throwing your legs over his shoulders like it was nothing. Like you were a ragdoll. His ragdoll. The new position is just an excuse for him to hit every single sweet spot deep inside your aching walls. You can feel him bottom out while inside you, which has you clutching the sheets for dear life like it was your lifeline. It was blissful.

You feel a tightness in your stomach, one that you had felt before, but not this strong. Jiyong was experienced. He knew how to pleasure a woman such as yourself. He also knew that you were going to cum with the way your greedy pussy enveloped his dick, which he couldn't help but chuckle at.

“Ji ‘m so close! Please let me cum…” you beg of him, too far gone to even paint a picture in your mind of how desperate you are in this moment.

“Promise me that you’re mine,” he demands of you.

“I’m fucking yours Ji…all fucking yours!” you let out with raggedy moans as he stuffs you with even more of his dick.

“That’s what I like to hear. Now let go for me, baby. Prove that I made the right decision by letting you cum,” he says in between his erratic movements, his words only spurring the two of you on. He finally hits that spot deep inside of you, enough for you to teeter over the edge and finally milk his cock with your sweet release.

He throws his head back at the feeling while still pile driving himself at an agonizing pace into your spent pussy. Before he knows it, his sticky ropes of seed spill into your walls, where it would stay for the rest of the night if it were up to him.

He finally pulls out and then positions himself so he’s laying directly next to your achy body. As the two of you catch your breath from your guys’ respective orgasms, he caresses your tresses.

“I love you,” he says, breaking the silence once and for all, causing you to look at him in shock.

“You love me?” you ask, wondering if you had heard him right.

“How could I not, baby?” he responds.

“I was just wondering because…I love you too...always have” you admit.

The look he gave you was one of awe and admiration. You felt so lucky to have a boy who cared for you deeper than you could’ve ever imagined. Needless to say, he felt the same way.

“So where do we go from here?” he asks nervously with a chuckle.

“I may have an idea,” you say before pressing a gentle kiss to his soft lips.

[duskvsdawn]

We will take care of you

Shu and Ver were worried about you. You had started distancing yourself more and more from them lately. You had been swatting away their hands when they wanted to touch you, or you would just walk away if you had the chance. They wanted to help you, but weren't entirely sure how to do that. So, they had a long talk together and decided to take things slow to try and make you feel more at ease.

≫ A/N: So, this is that Shu and Ver fic I have been talking about. This is a content warning before the content warning: this is inspired by my own trauma issues, experiences and therapy sessions. And a dream I had where Ver and Shu helped me work through the intimacy issues I have been having all my life. I feel like these two would be the perfect guys to comfort reader who has gone through something similar. Both are so gentle, kind and caring... And if two boyfriends could surely heal a person who has gone through a lot, it would be them, in my opinion. Also, this turned out pretty long, but uh, I hope you'll bear with me. Also, if this is too emo and triggering for you, feel free to sit this one out; I won't blame you at all. I am hoping this will somehow function as therapy of sorts.

Content: massive angst warning, mentions of childhood abuse, mentions of loved ones dying, reader has massive depression, anxiety and traumas because of it, mention of suicidal thoughts, due to these traumas you have started distancing yourself, mentally and physically, and the boys want to make you feel comfortable with being intimate once more after it started giving you massive anxiety, it gets a bit smutty after lots of fluff and comfort but it's mostly comforting smut, the smut part is a very slow burn but keep in mind that reader is really sensitive about this, also Hexy my beloved is being mentioned

Art credits: I looked far and wide for the original art, but sadly I couldn't find it :(

« ✦ —⋆——― ꒰ঌ·✦·໒꒱ ———⋆— ✦ »

If you like my works, please like, comment and reblog! It is much appreciated ❤ And if you really enjoyed it, please follow me so you can be kept up to date on future uploads!

Your boyfriends were incredibly worried about you. It had been a few weeks since you even allowed them close, except for the hugging you always did when you went to sleep, and even then, you would sometimes ask them to not touch you. They were at their wits' end, they didn't know what to do anymore. They tried to give you space, or take things slow when it came to seducing you. No matter what they tried, nothing worked. You would fall asleep crying, apologising to them, saying how you felt bad that you didn't feel good, and you were moping around them, and that they had to deal with it. The boys tried to ease your mind as much as they could, but they were running out of options.

You had been best friends since childhood, and you got together quite some years ago now. If anyone was supposed to know how to help you, it would be them. They knew you better than anyone. They knew about all your struggles in life. Your parents divorced when you were at a young age, and no matter which home you lived in at that moment, there would always be some form of abuse going on, either mental or physical, or just straight-up neglect. Eventually, you ended up at your dad's again, but when things didn't work out once more, you were sent to an inpatient clinic of sorts to undergo therapy. Since then, you had been living in lots of different places, getting mentorship to help you with your mental struggles. You had re-established a bond with your dad after he worked really hard on bettering himself, and you finally managed to catch up on all the things you missed during your childhood, somewhat. However, he passed away 2 years ago, and since then, your mental health has spiralled even more. Your nan and your aunts were your pillars in life, but even they didn't know what to do anymore. Shu and Ver were familiar with your mood swings by now, but this one seemed so different. Due to all the trauma you endured, intimacy and self-hate have always been at the forefront in your relationship, and so has your fear of them abandoning you when they would get fed up with you, even though they wouldn't ever dream of leaving you alone. You went through therapy after therapy, but none of them worked, and you were getting sick and tired of your mental issues, suicidal thoughts returning that you hadn't had in a while.

The boys decided to ask one of your close friends, Hex, for help. He knew the three of you very well, and he knew people very well in general. It was his job to help other people, after all, so he was their last hope. They had a long talk, which took up almost an entire day, but they think they finally realised what had been going on with you. It was something they didn't expect in the slightest, but now that they heard it from him, it made so much sense. Hex also gave some tips on how to make you more comfortable with intimacy once more, since it seemed to give you massive anxiety lately, getting you teary-eyed when either of them even tried to show you any of it in any form, it didn't even have to be sexual. It felt weird for him to give his friends tips on this, since it felt like this was something he shouldn't be getting involved with. But he knew how much the three of you loved being physical with each other when either of you needed some cheering up, so at the same time, he wanted to help the best he could.

When your boyfriends came back home, the sun was already setting, and you left a note that you had gone on a walk. They wondered how long you had been gone now, but they weren't too worried. They knew you had been going on walks again lately to lose weight and to empty your head somewhat, as you would be blasting music through your headphones while taking a swig of your vape every now and then. They joined you on walks many times, but if they were busy, you would go on your own. It was already pretty late, so they decided to shower so they could drag you to bed as soon as you came home and took your own shower to talk about some things.

Just as Ver and Shu got out of the shower, you had gotten home yourself. Shu greeted you by attempting to kiss your cheek, but you pulled away. "Sorry, not now. I'm sweaty. Let me shower first, at least," you said as you took off your headphones and put your vape on the charger, heading upstairs afterwards to take said shower. A deep sigh left Shu's mouth as he sat down on the couch, burying his head in his hands. "Are you sure this is going to work?" Shu asked his boyfriend as he put his head on Ver's shoulder. Ver assured him it will be okay as he softly pats his partner's head. Both of them just sat on the couch for a while, really nervous about all they wanted to discuss with you. After some time, you entered the living room in your pyjamas to vape a little more before going to bed.

"I uhm... I'm going to bed. Good night. Love you," you said as you turned on your heels to walk up the stairs again to head to the bedroom. "Hey, wait. We're coming with you," Ver said as he followed you, Shu close behind him. You wrapped yourself around in your blanket after you had sprayed some perfume on yourself that would always manage to calm you down somewhat. Shu and Ver lay down next to you, in their own spots and wrapped their arms around you.

"There is something we would like to talk about with you," your boyfriend said as one hand rubbed gentle circles on your hip. Panic started rising, and you were close to tears. "You are fed up with me, aren't you? You're going to leave and never come back, aren't you? You don't want to do this anymore, I don't blame you. I am a real challenge to be around, after all. I don't see why anyone would want to put up with my bullshit to begin with, and-" you just kept rambling on and on as tears spilled over. But Shu, who was in front of you, was quick to reach up to your cheeks to wipe your tears away with a thumb. Teary eyes looked into his gentle and soft galaxy-coloured ones, and it made you stop in your tracks. If you weren't under so much stress right now, you would be drowning in those beautiful eyes of his.

"Don't worry, love. We aren't going anywhere. We would just like to share with you what we talked about with Hex today. We told you we were meeting up with him, right? Well, there were some interesting things he told us that might make a lot of sense to you if you think about it." Shu said as he left a kiss on your cheek. You swallowed with difficulty and nodded, deciding to hear them out. So they told you all they had learned today.

Ver started off by saying that he knew you really hated that you felt like this, but he assured you once more that they would never leave you. That even if your trauma brain didn't believe them when they said it, they really loved you, and they wouldn't be going anywhere. Shu continued by saying that Hex had told them that it made sense you were feeling this way the past few weeks, after they thought about it for a little bit. Things had been relatively stable in your life for a little bit. The stressful situations around your aunts were starting to calm down, and your nan was doing relatively okay, even though she missed your dad dearly. Your friends were doing okay as well, and so were your lovers. And since it was like second nature for you to always put others above yourself at any cost to take care of them, your brain was probably really confused about what to do now. Your mind and body had been under constant stress for years; it was all you knew. And now, things were calming down. Your mind and body were probably getting some sort of cortisol withdrawal, and were making up for it by creating it themselves. If it's all you know, it makes sense that your brain goes into overdrive when things suddenly go quiet. So basically, your mind created something to stress over when there was nothing else there.

You listened to Shu in awe. It suddenly clicked in your mind, and it all made sense now. Since everyone had been doing so well, that's when you became so restless, more restless than you've ever been before. You couldn't believe your brain would sabotage you like that! You just wanted to enjoy some peace and quiet for once, but instead, this bullshit happened.

Ver followed up by saying that he also gave some tips on how to approach the whole intimacy issues the three of you were having. He felt you flinch in his arms when the word "intimacy" even left his mouth. With a shaky exhale, you asked him what Hex suggested to them. Ver continued by saying that they will try to be as slow and gentle as possible, slowly but surely building up to the level the three of you used to be at. You missed those pleasure-filled nights so much, but at the same time, you didn't. You really weren't in the mood for touches and kisses at all. The guys knew that and had also discussed that with the therapist. Shu told you that you had been giving mixed signals lately when it came to intimacy. You weren't sure what he was talking about at all. You had been pushing them away for weeks now. What mixed signals could there possibly be? Then, they told you something you hadn't thought about at all and weren't aware of.

Shu said that the last few weeks, you had been clinging to your boyfriends in your sleep, sometimes clinging onto them so hard that they would have marks on their backs in the mornings. They also noticed you had been having certain... Dreams lately. A blush spread onto your cheeks as you anticipated what he was going to say next. Ver chimed in by saying that they had noticed your eyes fluttering open as orgasms washed over you after you had been moaning their names in your sleep. The blush on your cheeks deepened; you couldn't deny these things. You had been having sexual dreams about them, but you just shrugged them off when you woke up and you just assumed it was random bullshit. You always had random dreams to begin with, so you assumed this was the case. Hex had told them that it might be a way of your brain trying to tell you that you really craved hugs and kisses, maybe even sex, without you knowing it. You hadn't thought about it like that before, but it made sense.

After these big revelations, the three of you just lay there in silence for a little bit. Neither of you was sure on what to say next. And all of a sudden, you started sobbing. Your boyfriends were the ones panicking now. Did they say something wrong? They looked at each other as you hid your face in Shu's neck, as the tears just kept coming. They asked you what was on your mind. In between sobs, you said, "Thank you... Truly... I have no idea where to go from here, but it at least feels nice to have answers. And thank you for always being here for me. Really, it means a lot to me." Ver and Shu relaxed once more, letting out a sigh of relief. Shu told you that in due time, things should go back to normal, once your head gets used to how things are now, and that you will be alright. He gently forced you to look at him, lifting your chin up with a thumb and forefinger. Your teary eyes met his once more, and the kind smile on his face calmed you down a little bit again. You took a deep breath and closed your eyes. You were exhausted after your crying fit, and they understood. The intimacy "training" will have to wait for another day. Then, Shu softly pressed his lips onto yours. Your eyes flew open in surprise, but you didn't pull back this time, and neither did Shu. Your eyes closed once more, and for the first time in weeks, you kissed him back. Shu was the surprised one this time, but his hands softly weaved themselves through your hair, trying to pull you just a little bit closer, and you let him. Ver took this as a sign to give you some love as well, and left some kisses on your shoulder blade and the back of your neck. It still didn't feel right for you to do, and you still felt hollow inside, but you wanted to try. For them, the men you loved more than anything else in this world. You got up to pee, but quickly crawled back in bed afterwards. Between your two favourite men, once again, you faced Ver this time, who proceeded to gently press his forehead against yours. "Good night, babygirl," he whispered, leaving a quick kiss on your lips. You flinched, but didn't pull back. You wished both of them a good night, and you drifted off to sleep soon enough.

When you woke up the next morning, your boyfriends were already up. Your senses were greeted by the lovely smell of breakfast, and you headed downstairs. While all three of you were eating, you discussed how to approach getting you more comfortable with touching and kissing again, and anything that may follow after that. With a massive blush on your cheeks, you asked them what they thought was best. They decided they would take it one step at a time, taking things slowly to ease you into it. You were nervous, but you trusted them. The rest of the day, all of you just relaxed around the house, watching some random stuff on the tv.

That evening, in bed once more, they held their word. With every single thing they did, they would ask you if you were okay and kept a close eye on your reactions. It was kind of awkward, and it didn't feel great, but they were determined to get you more comfortable as time passed. That night, you allowed them to let their hands slip under your shirt to rub at your stomach and hips while showering you in kisses. You wanted to reciprocate them, but it didn't feel right, not yet.

The next night, you allowed Shu to wrap your leg around him, pulling your core against his crotch. It felt really strange; it was almost like you were a virgin all over again, even if you had done lewd stuff so many times before. It made you all flustered to feel his hard-on against you, since you still couldn't imagine he would even feel this way about you with all your insecurities and all that. Ver, meanwhile, was allowed to slip his hand under your shirt. When a hand brushed over one of your nipples, your hand grabbed his, and he instantly stopped. "Sorry, I don't think I am ready for this yet... Not... Ready to experience pleasure," you apologised as you turned your head around to look at him. Ver nodded knowingly and pulled his hand out of your shirt.

The night after that, you were facing Ver. His hand was allowed to slip under your shirt once more, and this time, you were okay with him gently twisting your nipple. It wasn't like it felt pleasurable yet, but you knew it should return in due time. In the meantime, Shu's hand snaked under your shirt as well, his hand slowly but surely making its way down south to get into your shorts. When he was so close to reaching your most private parts, you panicked, and your hand swiftly grabbed his. Shu understood that it was too far for now, and his hand withdrew from your shorts. Ver kissed you lots, and you did kiss back, but it still felt like you were hollow inside.

Another night came, which meant another night of "training". When Shu kissed your neck, you suddenly felt it. A spark of pleasure jolted through your body as he sucked on that one weak spot right below your ear. You gasped, not sure what to do. It surprised you so much that you were close to tears. But they noticed that something was up, and they could recognise that these were tears of happiness as a smile appeared on your face. And then, you felt the urge for closeness return. Your hand reached out to rub Ver's face, slowly moving to the back of his head. Your face inched closer to his, your lips ever so lightly brushing against his. And then, you kissed him. Both your hands were entangled in his hair now as you kissed him fervently. A chuckle left Shu's lips as he took this as an opportunity to slip his hand into your shorts once more, but he didn't go too low, rubbing gentle circles right above your clit, sometimes spreading his fingers out to rub around your folds but avoiding them for now. You didn't pull back, and you didn't stop him. After you had kissed Ver with all you had, you suddenly felt the need to kiss Shu. So you turned around and kissed him just as passionately. While you kissed the sorcerer, Ver's hand found its way in your shirt once more to softly tug at your nipple. And then, they heard it. That one moan was something that sent a shiver down their spines. Hearing you enjoy yourself once more almost made them teary-eyed themselves.

The following night, you said you were ready for a bit more. So the three of you undressed, just to get you more comfortable with being naked against them once more. It felt really strange, but it was nice to feel skin against skin once more. With a shaky hand, you reached out to touch them, even steeling yourself to touch what you had been most afraid of the last few weeks; their cocks. Your heart was beating out of your chest, but even with your featherlight touches, the sounds they made were motivating, and they gently pushed you to keep going. You wrapped a hand around Shu's member and slowly started moving your hand up and down. His responses were egging you on to keep going, even if you were close to tears with the nerves taking over. You knew he wanted you to keep going, but you couldn't imagine that someone as handsome as him would even want someone like you to touch him. He noticed that your thoughts were drifting, however, and gently lifted your face so you were forced to look into his eyes. His breathing was kind of shallow, but he assured you that it was okay to stop if you weren't comfortable. You told him you were fine and kept going. Hearing his reactions, you got more and more confident and sped up your movements. In the meantime, Ver had been rubbing himself against your butt, and judging by the sounds he was making, he was getting close. Shu wasn't far behind, however, as he started kissing you with so much passion. With some more stimulation from your hand, and Ver getting himself closer and closer, the two of them came. You gasped in surprise. You couldn't believe that they even wanted to do this with you to begin with. You wiped some of Shu's release off your stomach to taste it. It tasted bitter and salty, just like you remembered.

The night after that, you got a bit more confident, and you wanted to properly taste them. As you gave each of them a blowjob, Ver first and then Shu, they wanted to touch and kiss more of your naked skin while you were preoccupied with the other. After Shu had released inside your mouth, you swallowed and licked your lips afterwards. As you lay down between both of them again, Ver wanted to see how far he could go. His hand reached between your legs to start rubbing your folds. He could feel how wet you were, but you started shaking like crazy. Shu grabbed his hand and told him to stop as you clung onto the sorcerer and tears started spilling from your eyes. They decided that was enough for one night.

Another night came, and they wanted to properly spoil you, even if you had always been more comfortable with doing that for them. If they touched your own body, you didn't like it as much. But they wanted to push you through this. They knew they were so close now, and they wanted to give you that final push. They knew there would be lots of crying tonight, but they would be quick to shoo your insecurities away. As Ver was between your legs, eating you out, your hands entangled in his raven and cherise coloured locks as tears spilt from your eyes. You weren't sure if you were enjoying this, but you knew you had to do it to get comfortable with them properly again. While Ver was busy getting you closer as soon as possible to give you that delicious high to hopefully make you more at ease, Shu would be there to kiss your lips and wipe your tears away. And if he wasn't doing that, his mouth would be busy sucking on your nipple while the other got some stimulation from his hand. You could feel yourself getting closer, your moans getting higher in pitch and louder. When you released all over Ver's lower face, your tears were uncontrollable at this point. After Ver wiped his face clean, he was quick to crawl up to your eye level again and shower you in kisses and compliments, telling you you did so good for him, and asking you how you felt. You said you weren't sure, but it also felt like a massive weight was lifted from your shoulders. You fell asleep more tired than ever that night.

The following night, they deemed you ready enough to get a full course meal of their love. It was so different from how the three of you usually had sex. It was full of gentle touches and love bites, and lots of kisses all over your body. It was about you tonight, even if you really wanted it to be the other way around. While Shu was pumping himself in and out of you, his body was pretty much entirely covering yours. He held you as close as possible and wiped away the tears that spilt over as you were being overwhelmed by pleasure after not feeling any of it for weeks on end. After some time, you started getting more desperate, and you enjoyed it more and more. Your hands were clawing at his back now as you hid your face in his neck. Ver was lying next to you, licking away some tears that ran over your cheeks. He could tell you were getting closer, and he wanted to give you that final push. One hand snaked between the two of you to rub at your clit, and you couldn't contain your sounds anymore. Sobbing Shu's name, you came, and Shu followed soon after, emptying himself inside of you. You reached out to Ver and kissed him deeply, even if you were exhausted, you wanted him to have a turn too. He asked you if you were sure about this, and you nodded and said you were okay. You didn't have to tell him twice.

He quickly switched places with Shu, who was now the one to comfort you as you would be overwhelmed with pleasure once more. Ver hissed when he entered you as his hands hooked under your knees to basically fold you in half. Fuck, he had missed this so much. He had missed you so much. While he fucked you, he could tell you were even more sensitive than you were with Shu. Tears flowed freely once more as you were enjoying the love you were getting from both of them. It was Shu's turn to wipe away those tears now, as he gently kissed your entire face while Ver was fucking you like his life depended on it. Ver could tell you were getting close, so he angled his thrusts downwards so his dick would be rubbing against your clit. You were screaming now; it was all too much for you. You could feel your orgasm approaching you like a freight train; you couldn't stop this. Loudly moaning his name in his neck, you fell apart, and with a few more thrusts, Ver unloaded inside of you.

While you lay on the bed, absolutely spent, Shu was quick to get a wet washcloth to wipe you clean down there, and then went downstairs to grab you some soda to refuel your energy a little bit. After you had a few sips of your drink, you lay between your boyfriends, who wrapped you up in their arms and the comfy, warm blanket. "I am so proud of you, babygirl. You did so well for us the past week. I know you probably never imagined we'd get here again, but you sure did. And stuff might still be awkward and weird for a bit, but it will get better, and you will learn to enjoy it again, trust me. I missed this so much. Missed sharing my love with you so much..." Ver said as one hand gently cupped your face, and he left a loving kiss on your forehead. Shu, who was behind you, hugged you close and kissed the back of your neck. "And I am also proud of you, babe. I love you so much, and that will never change. With or without awkwardness around intimacy, we will still stick with you. You won't get rid of us that easily, remember that, alright?" the sorcerer said as one hand weaved through your hair. You nodded as you could feel yourself drifting off to sleep after you wished both of them goodnight and told them you loved them. Both of them smiled and kissed you some more until they noticed you were asleep.

[einaudis]

.

[soupacool]

congrats on taking T and experiencing voice changes, that's so exciting!! 🥳🥳✨✨

thank you!!! it's been a period of intense learning of myself and my place in the world and I wouldn't trade it for anything

[29121996]

anyway.

[mephisto-reporting]

Wearing This Dress Was a Mistake…or Was It?

Premise: You decide to prank him by making him think that you'd be wearing that risque, revealing outfit when you are about to head out... only to find out that pranks have consequences. Pairing: Reader x Xavier, Zayne, Rafayel, Sylus, Caleb (Seperate) Note: Reader and the men are in a relationship. This is suggestive. Please do not interact if you are a minor. If you wanted to be added to my taglist, please DM, ask or comment :D Content warning: Suggestive. MNDI.

CALEB

Caleb was lounging on your couch like he owned the place, one arm draped lazily over the backrest, the other holding a can of soda that he swirled absentmindedly. He had taken a few days off, escaping from his duties as Colonel to come back to Linkon. And now, here he was, making himself right at home in your apartment like he had never left. The sight was almost domestic, but you knew better—there was nothing ordinary about Caleb. Not anymore.

He was on leave, a rare moment where he could shed the weight of his uniform and just be Caleb. It was a refreshing change to see him like this—less guarded, more relaxed—but something about it sparked mischief in you. You'd always had a playful, mischievous relationship with Caleb when you were younger. Pranks, jabs, teasing—it had all been part of the dynamic. And now that he was back, you couldn't help but feel a familiar tug to push his buttons just a little.

You'd planned this prank for a while. Slipping into the most scandalous, revealing outfit you could find in your closet, one that certainly wasn’t something you'd wear out in public. You had no intention of actually leaving—just giving Caleb the briefest hint that you were about to, and seeing how he’d react.

You walked into the living room, draped in the most inappropriate outfit you could manage. A fitted dress that barely covered your thighs, a deep V that left little to the imagination, and a loose, barely-there wrap that hung carelessly from your shoulders. Your intention was to get under Caleb’s skin, to push him just a little—just enough to remind him that the old pranks hadn’t gone anywhere.

When Caleb glanced up, his relaxed demeanor faltered for just a second, his sharp gaze lingering on you. There was a flicker of something darker in his eyes, something predatory. But he said nothing at first, just observing you with a cold silence that sent a chill down your spine. Your pulse quickened slightly under his intense gaze, but you pushed down the thrill crawling up your spine. This was just a joke.

You took a deep breath, feigning innocence. "I'm heading out to meet some friends," you announced, grabbing your purse.

The shift was instantaneous.

The lazy, relaxed Caleb from moments ago was gone. His can hit the coffee table with a soft thud, his entire frame tensing as he straightened up. His gaze darkened, trailing over your figure with slow, possessive deliberation.

"You're wearing that?" His voice was low, almost casual—but you could hear the undercurrent of something dangerous lurking beneath it.

You swallowed but kept up the act. "Yeah. Why?" You tilted your head, feigning confusion. "It looks good, doesn't it?"

"You’re not going anywhere dressed like that." he muttered, the words falling from his lips in a near-growl.

You smirked, crossing your arms over your chest. "What, you think I can’t pull it off?"

He stood in one smooth motion, and before you could react, he was standing in front of you, his hand gripping your wrist with a surprising amount of force. His fingers were warm, rough, as if he were trying to ground himself with the touch.

"If you're so insistent on showing this side of you to others," he whispered, his breath hot against your ear, "then it’s only fair that I get to see more of it, isn't it?"

Before you could protest, he hoisted you effortlessly onto his shoulder, your legs dangling in the air as he carried you toward your room like a caveman claiming his prize.

"Caleb!" You gasped, half-laughing, half-embarrassed by the sheer force of his actions. But Caleb wasn't listening. His grip was firm, his footsteps purposeful as he crossed the room.

He threw open your bedroom door, his eyes locking with yours with an intensity that made your heart race. "You think you can strut around like this for anyone else?" His voice was dangerously calm, but the heat in his gaze betrayed the undercurrent of rage—jealousy, possessiveness—swirling just beneath the surface.

You opened your mouth to say something, but he silenced you with a heated kiss, his lips claiming yours in a way that left no room for argument. His lips were urgent, demanding, but still with an edge of care as if he couldn’t bear the thought of anyone seeing you in that outfit.

"Do you want me to show you what that outfit can do to any individual with a working braincell?" Caleb murmured against your lips, his breath shallow as he gently pushed you onto the bed. He towered over you, his body a wall of heat and strength, completely commanding your attention.

You couldn’t help but laugh breathlessly, still shaken by the intensity of the moment. "It was just a prank, Caleb. I didn’t mean—"

His fingers traced the line of your jaw with surprising gentleness before his eyes darkened. "No," he whispered. "You didn’t mean to tease me like this, but now that you have, you’re not going anywhere. Not until I’ve had my fill of you. I don’t like the idea of anyone else looking at you like this.”

You opened your mouth to explain, to tell you weren’t actually heading out like this, but before you could say a word, he was on you, his lips crashing against yours with a possessiveness that left you breathless. His hands roamed down your body, tracing the curve of your waist, gripping you tightly as if he were afraid someone might take you from him.

You could feel his breath on your neck, hot and heavy, as he pulled away just enough to whisper, “You’re mine, understand?” His words were both possessive and adoring, a dangerous combination you knew too well.

And as your neighbors found out soon after, the only sounds that filled the air that evening were far less friendly than the teasing words you’d exchanged earlier.

RAFAYEL

Rafayel was early. Again.

Technically, he was supposed to be on time tonight—after all, it was his gallery event. But you knew better. You had predicted, with painful accuracy, that he'd find some way to ding-dong ditch his own damn celebration. Which was exactly why he was here at your apartment an hour before you needed to leave.

"I'm only here because Thomas would physically drag me if I didn't show up at all," he muttered from the other side of the door of your bedroom. "Consider this me being a responsible artist. All of you should be grateful."

You hummed, feigning disinterest as you checked your reflection in the mirror. "Oh, I am grateful, Rafayel."

"Good, as you shou—"

He cut himself off entirely as you stepped out from your bedroom.

You had planned this prank the moment you'd heard he was coming early. Because if Rafayel wanted to ditch the gallery, you'd at least make sure he suffered before he got his way. So, instead of slipping into something elegant and refined for an art exhibition, you had opted for something else entirely. It wasn’t even an outfit you would wear outside—it barely covered anything at all, and the material clung to your body in all the wrong places. A sheer, tight-fitting slip with lace accents, enough to leave little to the imagination. The fabric wasn’t completely transparent, but it did the job well enough to make every inch of your skin noticeable. Every inch of skin exposed was deliberate. Calculated. A direct attack on Rafayel's composure.

And oh, it worked.

His entire body stiffened, the lazy smirk on his lips frozen mid-form. His next grape missed his mouth completely, bouncing pathetically off his chin and rolling onto the floor. But he didn't even notice.

For a long, silent moment, all Rafayel did was stare.

Then, dramatically, he clutched his chest. "No."

You blinked. "No?"

"I can't take you anywhere like this," he lamented, waving frantically at all the exposed skin. "You—You will steal the show! The gallery will forget my masterpieces the moment you walk through the door!" Rafayel’s eyes flickered to the door, then back to you, his expression a mix of shock and something darker. “You’re kidding. You want me to take you to the gallery dressed like… this? Everyone will be staring, and I can’t have that.”

He turned his back to you with a huff, clearly flustered. He spun around to face you again, his eyes narrowing, and a flicker of possessiveness flashed across his face. “This is too much. I’m not taking you out like this.”

You raised an eyebrow. “Are you saying you’re embarrassed to be seen with me?”

His expression faltered, and for a split second, you saw a vulnerability in his eyes. But it was quickly replaced by his usual dramatic demeanor. “Embarrassed? No!! I just don’t want everyone gawking at my—especially when I’m the one who’s supposed to admire you tonight. How am I supposed to take you out like this? All eyes will be on you, and I don’t know if I’m prepared for that level of attention. How am I supposed to look at this…”

"Is that such a bad thing?" You teased, twirling a loose strand of hair around your finger.

"Yes!" Rafayel practically whined. He circled you like a predator, eyes flickering with a hunger he hadn’t quite named yet. "Some art should be displayed for the world, sure," he murmured, voice turning dangerously low. "But some art? This should be kept private. Mine."

You bit your lip, barely suppressing a laugh. "Raf, it's just a prank. I'm not actually going like this."

He stilled. Then, very slowly, he grinned.

"Oh?" he purred, stepping closer until there was barely any space left between you. His fingers skimmed the edge of your exposed thigh, tracing your skin before gripping it lightly. "Then you should go change, hmm?"

You moved to step back, but Rafayel caught your wrist. His grip was loose, teasing, but there was no mistaking the heat behind it.

"Ah, wait," he murmured, feigning deep thought. "Actually… No. That would take too long."

You frowned. "What—?"

"We're already late," he sighed, tone laced with mock regret. "And if we're already late, then it doesn’t really matter, does it?"

Before you could say anything else, Rafayel scooped you up in one swift motion, his hands firmly gripping you. “Forget the gallery,” he said, his voice practically a growl. “You’re not leaving this apartment until I’ve taken my time enjoying this… work of art.”

“Rafayel, wait!” You tried to protest, but he was already striding toward your bedroom, his grip firm around you.

“You don’t deserve to wear something this distracting for anyone else,” he muttered, his voice laced with a possessive hunger. “I’ll be the only one to appreciate it properly.”

Before you could even respond, his lips were on yours, demanding and heated, the rest of the world completely irrelevant. You could barely keep up with the intensity of his kiss as he stripped away the fabric, each motion more urgent than the last.

As the sound of Thomas’ calls rang through both your phones, going straight to voicemail, Rafayel didn’t spare it a second thought. The gallery? It was already a lost cause. Tonight, he had you—and he was taking his sweet time with it.

SYLUS

As Sylus prepared for his mission, a sense of anticipation hung thick in the air. He was packing his gear with the meticulous attention of a man who thrived on the chaos he created, readying himself for whatever dangerous task lay ahead. This lifestyle was no stranger to him —the dangerous, dark heart of his empire. But you couldn’t shake the worry that gnawed at you every time he walked out the door. Dangerous, illegal missions were a regular part of his life, and while you knew he could handle himself, the thought of him in harm’s way left you restless.

But you weren’t about to voice that concern—not when he took so much pleasure in riling you up with his teasing. Tonight, you had decided to give him a taste of his own medicine—payback, as you saw it. After all, his teasing and his ability to keep you on edge with his deep voice, knowing smirks, fleeting touches, and that intense gaze deserved a little retaliation. This time, you were going to make him work for it.

Fair was fair.

You stepped into the study, heels clicking against the floor, the sharp sound enough to draw his attention. His red eyes flickered up from his preparations, widening just slightly before narrowing with intrigue. You had dressed specifically to get a reaction—a short, black mesh dress that left little to the imagination, the sheer material teasing glimpses of lace underneath. The plunging neckline dipped scandalously low, while the cutouts along your waist accentuated every tempting curve.

Sylus let out a low, appreciative hum as he leaned back against the wall, taking his time raking his gaze over you.

“And where exactly do you think you’re going dressed like that, sweetie?” His smirk was lazy, but the sharp glint in his crimson stare was anything but.

You let your eyes linger on his figure for a moment, before casually offering, "Actually, I’m heading back to Linkon for a night out—clubbing with some friends." Your heels clicked softly against the floor as you took a few steps closer, and you could see his pupils dilate briefly, his reaction evident, though he masked it quickly with another smirk.

"Well, well," he drawled, his eyes still locked on your attire. "Funny, I’ve never gotten the pleasure of seeing you in such bold outfits before."

You shrugged nonchalantly, your lips curling into a playful smile. "I dress for the occasion."

A small chuckle escaped him, the sound rich and dark. "Interesting, these 'occasions' never seem to happen when I'm around." His eyes trailed over you once more, the intensity of his gaze making your pulse quicken.

He walked slowly, closing the distance between you in a few slow, measured strides. When he reached you, his fingers brushed against the exposed skin of your thigh, the touch featherlight, deliberate.

“I suppose I should consider myself unfortunate, then,” he murmured, trailing his hand higher. “But I’ll be damned, sweetie, you do look ravishing.”

You hummed, feeling the heat of his touch ghosting over your skin. "Maybe ypu were just not paying enough attention before."

His laugh was low, dark, full of amusement. "Oh, kitten," he purred, his hands drifting lower, tracing the dip of your waist before pulling you just a little closer. "Trust me, I pay attention. Especially when it comes to you."

Your breath hitched as his palm splayed possessively over your hip, his fingers teasing the hem of your barely-there dress. “Not worried about all the attention I’ll get?” you teased, meeting his gaze.

He let out a soft chuckle, the sound almost like a growl. "Sweetie, I know you can handle yourself if things go wrong." he said, his hands suddenly roaming over your skin, slow and deliberate, almost as if he were marking his territory. His touch was magnetic, entrancing. His fingers traced your jawline, grazing over the curve of your neck, and you felt the weight of his presence pull you in, closer to him with each movement.

He smirked, as if he could sense the effect he was having on you. "Go ahead. Have fun tonight," he murmured, pulling out his black card from his wallet and offering it to you. "Just don't have too much fun without me." His breath ghosted over your lips, hot and tantalizing, and you could feel his eyes trailing lower

You saw it then—the flicker of something dark and hungry in his stare, a silent challenge laced with possession. It made you want to push just a little further.

“What if I do?”

The moment the words left your lips, you barely had time to react before Sylus’s hands were on you. A startled gasp escaped you as he lifted you effortlessly, locking your legs around his waist. The back of your dress rode up, and his fingers pressed into your thighs, holding you firmly in place as his mouth found yours. The kiss was deep, slow, devastating. He wasn’t just kissing you—he was claiming you, drawing you in until the thought of leaving, of doing anything other than this, felt ridiculous. “Then I guess I’ll have to make sure you’re more entertained...” he murmured against your ear, his voice dripping with possessiveness, as if you were already his in every sense.

Without another word, he carried you through the mansion, his lips never leaving yours as his pace quickened. He didn’t even give you a chance to respond, his hold on you firm, commanding, as though the very idea of you going out tonight was laughable. His smirk never faltered, his confidence radiating in waves.

“You think I’d let that happen?” he said in a husky whisper against your lips, his voice thick with amusement. As he kicked open the door to his bedroom, he laid you down on the bed with a grin that sent a shiver down your spine. “Guess neither of us is going anywhere tonight…”

You tried to speak between stolen breaths, to tell him it was a prank, but he only smirked against your mouth, cutting you off with another slow, intoxicating kiss.His weight pressed you down onto the bed, his hands sliding over every inch of exposed skin. “It’s a good thing you weren’t actually going out,” he mused, voice dripping with amusement. “Because I plan to keep you here… All. Night. Long.”

A thrill ran through you as you realized just how easily he'd flipped the situation in his favor. And you weren't sure if you could—if you wanted to—fight it.

XAVIER

You had been scheming for a while, setting the perfect trap to prank Xavier, and today was the day you were finally going to execute your plan. You’d texted him earlier, asking him to swing by your apartment to pick up the meals you had prepared for him. You knew full well Xavier could barely cook an egg without burning it, so he was always appreciative when you made him something special. You always made quite a batch of food whenever he came over to pick it up so he could store them in his freezer.

He had a spare key to your apartment in case of emergencies, but today, you were going to make sure he’d get more than just food when he came over. He’d always been so calm and collected in most situations that it was infuriating at times. You had tried to get a reaction out of him before but had always failed. But today, it would be different. Today, you knew you would get him to falter. You’d been thinking of a little prank to get a rise out of him—and you knew exactly what would get under his skin.

When you heard the door click open, you made sure to pick up your purse slowly, letting Xavier get a good look at the outfit you’d chosen: A tight, revealing midnight blue dress that clung to your curves like a second skin, the plunging neckline barely covering what was necessary and the high slit on the side showing just enough leg to drive anyone wild. The fabric was soft, almost like a second layer of skin, and you knew it would make his blood run hot.

Xavier’s footfalls slowed, and the air seemed to thicken with tension as he entered the room, his eyes immediately darkening the moment they landed on you. His usually calm expression shifted, but only slightly, and his voice, low and even, carried an edge. “You have plans?” His tone was casual, but you could tell it didn’t match the storm brewing in his gaze.

“Oh, yeah, I’m heading out with some colleagues,” you answered nonchalantly, knowing full well that would get him riled up. In your mind, this was all part of the prank. You were expecting a laugh, a joke, maybe even a playful remark.

His eyes narrowed, the calm veneer slipping away. “Wrong answer.”

You tilted your head slightly, looking at him with feigned confusion. “Huh?”

“I said, wrong answer. You are not going out to meet them… in that?” He spoke slowly.

“Why not? What’s wrong with the dress? I think it makes me look nice.” You looked at your dress pretending that you didn’t know what was wrong with it. “Plus, I already made plans with them…”

He didn’t hesitate, slamming the door behind him with a soft thud. His hand rested on the doorframe as he leaned in, towering over you. “Your plan,” he said, voice gruff with unspoken demand, “is with me. Right here. And only I should be the one seeing you in that dress. And outside of it.” he added, his voice dark with possessiveness.

Your heart raced, though you maintained an innocent air. “Xavier, come on... I’m just going out for fun. It’s not a big deal.” You tried to laugh it off, but your breath caught as his hands trailed over your skin, tracing your body with an intention that left no room for interpretation.

��You didn’t have a chance to react before he was right in front of you, his frame crowding you against the door, his hands gripping your hips as he lifted you slightly.

He didn’t respond to your attempt at casualness. Instead, his gaze was fierce, intense, and utterly unyielding. The meals you had prepared was forgotten. The only thing on his mind was you—and the dress you wore, too.

“Why do they get to see you like this when it’s meant for me?” His voice dropped, each word heavier than the last.

Your breath hitched at the intensity in his voice. The heat between you was immediate, pressing, suffocating. Xavier reached up, his fingers gently grazing your neck, then sliding down to your waist, his touch possessive and slow.

You tried to laugh it off again, your playful nature not quite prepared for how serious he had gotten. “It’s just a prank,” you said, offering an innocent smile, hoping to break the tension. “I am not going anywhere…” You giggled, but it came out a little nervous. “I swear… It’s just a prank, Xavier.”

He blinked once,  the twice, confusion flickering in his eyes. His boyish, innocent looked returned, stunned at your words. He seemed to process it for a moment. Then, the intensity of his gaze returned, fiercer than before. He took a step forward, closing the non existent distance between you, and his lips were suddenly on yours—hard, commanding. His lips crushed against yours, his tongue immediately claiming dominance as he growled low in his throat.

Before you could even process what was happening, you were on the couch, his body pressing you into the cushions. His hands roamed, touching you everywhere. as he leaned down to whisper in your ear.

“Prank or not,” he said, his voice hushed but full of intensity, “you’ve got me thinking about you in that dress with them—with anyone else.” His hands moved lower, sliding over the fabric of your dress. “You thought teasing me would be funny, huh? Let’s see how funny it is now.” His tone was equal parts teasing and threatening, a dangerous mix that made your heart race.

You gasped as his hands found your thighs, pulling you against him, his body already pressing into yours. There was no more pretending, no more games. Xavier’s need was undeniable, and you couldn’t escape the heat between you.

His lips met yours again, deeper, more frantic this time, as if making sure you understood just how serious he was about what was happening between you. You didn’t stand a chance against him.

And when the night ended, teasing Xavier definitely wouldn’t be on your list of things to do again... or maybe it would be.

ZAYNE

The dress was daring—too daring, perhaps. The fabric clung to your body, smooth and sultry, dipping dangerously low in the front and riding scandalously high on your thighs. The sheer lace along the sides barely covered enough, teasingly revealing glimpses of skin beneath. It was the kind of dress that would have heads turning, and you knew it.

That was the point.

You had planned this all too perfectly. A new pastry café had just opened downtown, and you’d invited Zayne out for a date. You had been expecting a reaction when he arrived—maybe a subtle quirk of his brow, a small shift in his usual stoic demeanor. Something.

Instead, when you opened the door and greeted him with an innocent smile, his gaze flickered over you, and for a moment, there was nothing but silence.

Then, the door clicked shut behind him.

His expression remained unreadable, but his movements weren’t. The way he took his time removing his gloves, slipping them off with methodical ease before placing them neatly on the nearby counter. The way his fingers traced the hem of his coat, unbuttoning it in a slow, deliberate motion.

“Interesting choice,” he finally said, his voice calm—too calm—as his gaze finally lifted back to meet yours.

You grinned, shifting your weight just slightly to make the dress slide a little higher along your thigh. “Do you like it?”

He didn’t answer immediately. Instead, he took a step forward, and you felt the weight of his presence settle over you. His fingers brushed your arm, barely there, before trailing down your wrist. The lightest touch. A doctor’s touch—controlled, precise. But beneath it was something else.

Something simmering.

“Tell me.” His voice was still even, his tone almost thoughtful as he lifted your hand to his lips, pressing a soft, lingering kiss to your fingertips. “How far were you planning to go with this little game of yours?”

Your heart stuttered. He knows.

You feigned innocence, tilting your head as if confused. “Game? I was just dressing up for our date.”

“Is that so?” His lips curved, the barest hint of amusement slipping through. “Then I suppose you wouldn’t mind if we went outside right now.”

Your stomach flipped. He wouldn’t.

Would he?

Before you could respond, his other hand moved—so subtle, so swift—and in one seamless motion, he pulled you closer, his fingers splaying over your lower back. Your breath hitched as your bodies pressed together, the warmth of him seeping through the thin material of your dress.

His lips were close now, brushing against your ear. “You forgot,” he murmured, “I know you.”

Your skin burned.

You swallowed, trying to keep your composure. “Okay, fine. It was a prank.”

Zayne chuckled softly. The sound was low, velvety, but it sent a shiver down your spine. “I knew that before coming over.”

His fingers traced slow, idle circles against the small of your back, and suddenly, you were all too aware of how little there was between you. How easy it would be for him to simply pull—just a little—and the dress would slide right off your shoulders.

You blinked. “Wait, you—?”

“Of course I knew.” He leaned in, his breath brushing against your jaw. “You think I don’t know when you’re trying to get a rise out of me?” The heat in his voice made your knees weak.

Your heart pounded against your ribs as his fingers traced a slow path up your spine, dragging along the zipper of your dress.

“I knew the moment you picked up my call earlier and sounded too innocent. The way you sent me a picture of the food but conveniently cropped yourself out.” His fingers pressed, teasing, against the small of your back. “And now? Now you’re here, looking like this and expecting me to just let you waltz out into a crowded café?”

You barely managed a breath before he tilted your chin up with two fingers, his expression unreadable save for the faintest glint of something more. “Cute.” His lips brushed against yours, feather-light. “But you knew better.”

You shivered at the subtle challenge in his voice, the sheer restraint beneath it. “Zayne, we have a reservation—”

“Mm.” He kissed the corner of your mouth, slow and deliberate. “We’ll reschedule.”

“I—”

Whatever you were about to say was swallowed by his kiss. It wasn’t rushed or frantic—it was deliberate. A slow, consuming thing that left no room for escape. His hands were firm but unhurried as he guided you back, step by step, until your back met the nearest surface—the couch, the wall, you didn’t even know anymore.

Zayne finally pulled away, but only just. His breath fanned across your lips, his fingers still resting against your waist. He looked at you then, truly looked at you, his eyes dark with something unspoken.

“You wanted my attention.” His voice was a whisper now, a dangerous kind of quiet. “You have it.” Your protests faded the moment his hands slid lower, gripping your thighs just enough to make your breath hitch. His lips trailed downward, past your jaw, tracing a searing path along your neck before murmuring, “Tell me, was the prank worth it?”

And as his hands began to move, taking their time, exploring, savoring—one thing became very, very clear.

Prank or not, you wouldn’t be leaving for that café tonight.

AN: reblogs, feedback and opinions are appreciated!

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[talkorsomething]

They literally just had a conversation about ice cube trays and whether or not they were clean (they decided they were not i think?) and did NOT ask me anything. Do i not exist to you people