#let this find you pls
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Some nights ago I had a dream where a guy told me he was 20.7 years old. I bring that up as a detail that stood out to me (i think that would make it so he'd be on his eighth, going on ninth month towards being 21? I'm not sure, it was the middle on the night when i did the math and i didn't have a calculator).
In honor of that strange man that i met in my dream, i wanted to talk about the first guy i had a crush on.
I think i was about two, maybe three years old when my older brother showed me star wars for the first time. For years i remembered in vivid detail when Obi-Wan, Qui-Gon and Jar Jar looked at the underwater city, and when Anakin did a turn in Beggar's Canyon during the Boonta Eve. That's beside the point, for what i saw the most was the original trilogy.
My brother's favourite character was Luke Skywalker, and so he became mine as well. I wanted to be the jedi, i wanted to wield a lightsaber and do cool stuff with my mind like Luke did. I wanted to be the hero, the beloved son that could turn even the coldest, cruelest and most distant of fathers back into the light. I probably also wanted to be a man like he was, but i was completely distracted by just how pretty he is.
Luke was my first crush. Luke was the kind of man that i aspired (and sometimes still do) to be. I didn't care that he was whiny; i was a child, i had been told several times just how whiny i was myself. No, i cared that he was kind (and cute, but that's beside the point). I cared that he was smart and gentle and that he cared about the people around him. I cared that he loved his friends, his mentors, his family. I cared that he was so very powerful and chose to be kind.
I came out as bi when i was thirteen, as ace when i was fourteen, and as trans when i was sixteen. Through the years it became a silly kind of comfort to see edits and analysis and just funny memes about queer readings on Luke. It made it easier to keep comparing myself to my childhood hero, to find new ways to grow and learn about life and its details.
Finding something or someone to love so profoundly that it inspires love, trust and respect is probably one of the best ways of growth I've ever experienced. I think i'm lucky to have seen Luke as someone to look up to when i was so young. It got me through many things as i've aged, and i feel at home reading him as gay i am in ways that in other characters i just can't quite find myself relating to.
I hope this helps you, strange man of my dream. It's all true, every word, but it was written just for you.
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First <- Part 18 <- Part 19 -> Part 20
Masterpost
#DC#DC Comics#Dick Grayson#Tim Drake#Jason Todd#Damian Wayne#Bruce Wayne#Wally West#Clark Kent#Roy Harper#Victor Stone#Garfield Logan#Donna Troy#Koriand'r#Kara Zor El#Conner Kent#Batman#Superman#Diana Prince#Listen. LISTEN#I know it's natural to assume that Tim would love the costume too as a Dick Grayson fanboy#But I swear to you I saw a panel of him making fun of it I SWEAR#If someone finds it let me know pls. I did not hallucinate this guys#He was with Babs?? or someone and he was holding it and asking if Dick REALLY wore that thing#Anyway as you can see I am very normal about Dick and Tim's relationship#Also I want to say that favorite hero =/= favorite person before anyone comes at me
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Do you think if Bingge somehow gotten into Shen Qingqiu head via dreamscape(and dug deeper than Bingmei ever dared), he would see Shen Yuan in a room filled with his merch, where he was reading his story, defending him in comments and think: âhe might love you most, but he loved me first.â?
#what is that about binghe that wonât let me think of anything else?#sqq you have the same problem if you ever find a solution pls shaređđœ#svsss#luo binghe#shen qingqiu#bingqiu
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I lost track of that one post about the clones passive aggressively wearing the names of individuals they hate during the war and then proceeding to associate that name with a bunch of stupidity, but
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#artists on tumblr#star wars fanart#star wars: the clone wars#crack post#count dooku#Trooper D00ku#oc#if you find that post lemme know#there are unmined depths to this idea OP#let me credit you pls
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naming myself official ceo of lizzidarity (name i came up with). anyone else here insane after their interactions in the finale or is it just me
#trafficblr#life series#wild life smp#solidaritygaming#jimmy solidarity#lizzie ldshadowlady#joel smallishbeans#wlsmp#fanart#lizzidarity#<- if there IS a preexisting ship name pls let me know but i cant find like any content of this ship lol#trafficshipping#jimmy x lizzie#solidaritygaming x ldshadowlady#i cannot emphasize how much this is **SHIP ART** I SHIP THESE TWO I THINK THEY KISS ON THE MOUTH#SEABL1NGS TRUTHERS BEWARE THIS IS NOT FOR YOU#jizzidarity#<- edit: adding this as well for all three of them since that is the intention here with that last drawing lol#once again i came up w this name but lmk if theres an existing one
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Puppy Eyes
animagus!Mattheo Riddle x gn!reader; fluff
summary: your boyfriend suckered you into becoming an animagus with him, and knowing him it was probably to cause mischief. but surrounded by the night breeze and the stars in his eyes, you know youâd follow him on any adventure.
a/n: 2 published in 2 days? maybe i am magic. iâm kinda obsessed with the idea of animagi and i cannot for the life of me find one where mattheo is one too. so i wrote one. iâm definitely down to write a part 2 or one for theo, just let me know if thatâs something youâd be interested in âĄ
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You were ready to get this damn leaf out of your mouth. A mandrake leaf specifically, which you were planning to use in your pursuit of becoming an animagus. It had been sitting in your mouth for almost an entire month and it wasnât getting any better. You looked up at your boyfriend, who was in the same predicament, with a scowl.
It had been his idea to start the process of becoming animagi and with those big brown eyes, who were you to say no? So here you were at breakfast trying not to swallow it and heaven forbid having to start over.
âI canât believe you guys are really going through with it,â Pansy looks between the two of you.
âRiddle just wants to commit crimes and get away with it,â Draco smirks, âimpressive he roped y/n into it with him though.â
Mattheo rolls his eyes before focusing his attention back on you. The smile he gives you makes your irritability fade away.
Before you knew it the month was up and all there was left to do was wait for a lightening storm. Which just so happened to be tonight. Mattheo had kept the phials of potion in the shrieking shack after you had finished putting them together. Thatâs where you were heading now.
He was sitting cross legged on the floor when you made it inside. His eyes lit up once he saw you, a small smile finding its way onto his lips. âI was a little worried you were going to back out.â
âI thought about it,â you tease and you settle down next to him. âYou sure about this?â
âCompletely.â He gives a squeeze to your hand before placing the crystal phial in your grasp, the liquid inside now a blood red.
You get out your wand and say the incantation one last time and pause to watch Mattheo take the potion like he was taking a shot of fire whiskey.
With a deep inhale, you follow Mattheoâs lead and tip the potion into your mouth.
The sensation is⊠odd. Like your bones were all shifting at once. Thereâs a searing pain everywhere and that double heartbeat you had experienced while performing the incantation over the past week. Moments pass before you open your eyes.
Your perspective of the room has changed drastically, everything towering above you. Right in front of you stands a striking dark wolf, at least double your height. And those chocolate brown eyes are unmistakable.
You arenât surprised that Mattheo turned out to be a canine. You also arenât surprised how ethereal he looks. If anything, you were surprised he wasnât a golden retriever, with his eager to please personality (at least for you) and puppy dog eyes.
You notice his tail wagging wildly behind him which leads you to look behind you and see a fluffy, mocha-colored tail doing similar. While you were mesmerized by your new appendage, Mattheo padded his way over to you and dropped into a laying position to not intimidate you.
Pulling your attention to your boyfriend you see he still has the scar on the bridge of his nose, only now it rests in the middle of his snout. Instinctively, you push your head into his fluffy neck, letting out a sigh when he rests his chin on you. He still smells the same as he normally does, cigarettes and his cologne filling your lungs.
You find yourself migrating between his paws, curling into the soft fur of his chest.
You lay together for a while, the storm still raging on outside the shack. As it sounds like itâs letting up, Mattheo rises on all fours and nods for you to follow him.
The grass is damp beneath your paws and the night sky is now clear above you. It takes a few moments to get used to moving on four legs instead of two, but Mattheo looks to be a natural. Your heart warms watching him run through the grass, apparently having the time of his life.
Finally feeling confident on your legs, you take off in his direction. Seeing you sprinting towards him has his tail moving a million kilos an hour. With a mischievous glimmer in his eyes, he turns and leads you toward the forest. In any other circumstance youâd be a little nervous running off into the forbidden forest, but something about your new form takes the anxiety off your chest.
The forest at night was something otherworldly. Moonlight filtered through the trees, illuminating Mattheoâs fur. You pushed your legs faster to catch up to his longer stride. Finally getting side by side, you take a look at him and the look on his face simultaneously fills your heart with glee and sorrow.
He looks free. More free than you had seen him in your half a decade of knowing him. You desperately want to see him like this all the time.
You donât immediately realize youâve stopped running, lost in the happiness radiating off him. Blinking a couple times, you look around at your surroundings. Youâre standing at the edge of a small lake, the moonlight sitting peacefully on the surface. To your left is, to your surprise, a unicorn resting in what appears to be its den of sorts.
Wonder in your eyes, you look up to find Mattheo already looking down at you. As you gaze into those brown eyes you adore, you can see the entire universe looking back at you.
The next morning finds you in Mattheoâs bed, his limbs tangled in yours. Heâs still sleeping and you canât help but think how gentle he looks like this. You press a kiss to his nose. As his grip tightens around you, you hear him mumble in his sleep laced voice, âI love you, my little fox.â
#mattheo riddle x reader#mattheo riddle#slytherin boys#harry potter#x reader#mattheo riddle x male reader#mattheo x you#animagi#if u know where i can find more pls let me know iâm desperate#gender neutral reader#mykie fics
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saying this as respectfully as possible but. Do not put fandom content creators on a pedestal. We are also just fans contributing to a community just as you are. We have boundary on our own work and thatâs it. What I say is not and should not be considered sth the whole fandom should listen to. Iâm just a normal ass person ranting about things on my blog. If it does not have a fandom tag for others to engage in, do not make it out to be me trying to start fights or addressing the whole community. Because itâs not.
Iâve said it before and I will say it again, my art, my lore talk, is biased. Iâve never tried to hide that I view Marika a certain way and will always develop my theory following that base assumption.
Aside from translation stuffs and pointing out in-game items, everything else I say you can look at it, agree or disagree, and move on to form your own opinions. Just because I draw stuffs doesnât mean you get to saddle me with responsibilities about managing fandom expectations. What the hell? Iâm a fan artist, Iâm the last person who you should look at for âleaderismâ (?) WHAT?
I can and will be a hater in my own space, like I know sometimes other artists will just post their stuffs and not engage too heavily with fandom, and for a while I did try to do that here (because Iâm already a dramatic ass on twitter), thatâs just not me though.
You will get art and you will get my opinions as well.
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#asking ppl to [celebrate different takes] is... WHAT?#different takes as in well I think she likes apples and you think she likes grapes. yeah thatâs some fun discussion to be have#but different takes as in the fundamental of a characterâs drive and personality??? NO#letâs put that down very clear here#I can still read fics where Marika is cold and calculate and manipulative as long as I can see thereâre layers to it and the author#set it up in a way that I can see they got her backstory and build those layers based on that#and then there are ppl who literally only portray her as omg evil girlboss 101 letâs blame everything on this cardboard character#then I click back.#and there r ppl who might not vibe with how i portray her and they can ignore me. THAT'S OK TOO. we r in our own space.#itâs as simple as that!#ever since the dlc is out i literally could see the amount of ppl blocking me go up and im just âokâ because i do go around muting ppl too.#that's normal fandom space managing experience. pls do that#lore discussion is for ppl to engage in so u say ur piece i say mine and we can continue or not depending on situation#but FANWORK? leave each other alone or be a hater in ur own space ok?#personal#also where are these ppl who have been defending Marika at... because if u exclude me#and some others i can count on one hand. where are these ppl?#ppl saying headass stuffs about the HS aren't even Marika fans or engage too much in fandom to begin with#meanwhile u can't even find one youtube lore essay that says anything good about her#ppl are even trying to give Messmer's mother position to GEQ for no goddamn reason#like where is this overwhelming support for Marika at cuz as the active Marika stan around im not seeing it
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#he doesn't want to fight with you ai di, he wants to Kissđđđ„ș
Nat Chen as CHEN YI KISEKI: DEAR TO ME (2023)
#kiseki: dear to me#kisekiedit#kdtm#kiseki dear to me#chen yi x ai di#ai di x chen yi#nat chen#chen bowen#louis chiang#chiang tien#jiang dian#userspring#uservid#userrain#userspicy#userjjessi#*cajedit#*gif#okay i made this specifically for the 3rd gif bc chen yi's expressions are making me giggle nonstop i was doubled over in tears last night#HE JUST WANTS TO KISS!! AI DI HE LOVES YOU LET HIM HIT IJDKSKG#okay real talk though the fact that he actually gives ai di space 90% of the time. lets him hang out at the bar#like he isnt following him around or constantly dogging him about giving him an answer not does he ever rly ACCUSE ai di of anything#he uses the zhang teng excuse to keep ai di from avoiding him but he doesnt try to keep him where he can see him constantly.#he lets ai di do his own thing and just spends time connecting the dots during the moments ai di comes back of his OWN VOLITION#& he slowly puts together what ai di is refusing to admit and makes his own intentions known without putting them in words either#besides stating his observations (& watching ai di react). Every interaction between them when ai di gets out of prison is like that#gifs 1&2 vs 4&5... letting ai di pull away because he doesnt know whats going on vs pulling him back both to say hey we arent done-#& say im still here FOR YOU - to see how ai di reacts being so close to chen yi after finding him hugging his jacket in his sleep#and then once hes Figured It Out he still keeps the space!! sends gifts... he only Acts when ai di comes back to him himself!!!!#and this time he's READY. and a simp. like. PLS the last 2 gifs..........dude. he wants to kiss so bad
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Cass Cain the woman that you are.
From Superboy (1994) #85
#cassandra cain#conner kent#superboy#batgirl#cass you're too full of personality. you're too powerful. we must get rid of you#<- dc editorial#sorry for koncass posting twice in a row i just find this issue delightful#look at kon's face#'herb'#kon fans does he talk like this all the time?? pls let me know
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he wins in monaco, he wins in monza / 2024
#formula 1#f1#charles leclerc#monza gp 2024#scuderia ferrari#**#i have three other options of this poster :)#pls let me know if you know the photographer bc i lost the source :(#also credit to the person who first used this text i felt so inspired!! but couldnt find the source one again bc it was a random post#dont really care that im quite late with this one
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im not the biggest alhaitham/kaveh shipper (because im a rare pair ho) but it seems to me that in alhaitham/kaveh getting-together fics tend to be... unequal.
the beautiful thing about alhaitham and kaveh is that they're both equally right and equally wrong and equally dicks about it. but the writers for alhaitham/kaveh much more frequently seem to give alhaitham the burden change (the burden of the character flaw) instead of kaveh.
in any good character arc, the main character has a fatal flaw or misconception, and by the end of that arc they have addressed that flaw in some definitive way. scrooge was a scrooge and learned that being that way was detrimental; merlin from finding nemo was overprotective to a fault and had to learn that he couldn't (and shouldn't) control everything and to let go; the wolf from little red riding hood learns that you should stop while you're ahead.
stories centering around romance tend to lean heavily on character arcs, which makes sense. and since romance generally requires two individuals to be vulnerable and open and emotional with each other, it makes double sense that alhaitham/kaveh authors zoom straight into alhaitham's lack of emotional vulnerability.
this bothers me.
in society, individuals are expected to experience and present emotions in a specific way. if someone dies, you cry. if someone smiles at you, you smile back. if you're at a party, you're supposed to be having fun. if you don't do these things, you're seen as impolite at best and a inhuman freak at worst. when these behaviors are frequent it's often viewed as emotional immaturity, or a lack of ability to feel at all. the inability or lack of willingness to conform to societies emotional expectations of you is seen as a flaw and a reason for exclusion.
alhaitham is canonically disliked and avoided for being the way he is. he prefers it this way, but that doesn't mean the people perpetuating this avoidance are in the right. they are the societal pressure to conform that alhaitham blows off. alhaitham could be the way he is for a lot of reasons: avoidant attachment style, trauma, following someone else's example (eg. his grandmother), or just his base personality. it doesn't MATTER. he is the way he is. kaveh having to accept that should be part of the story.
putting the burden of the fatal flaw on alhaitham, making the way alhaitham treats kaveh and the people around him the problem, feels invalidating. it implies heavily that alhaitham's way of interfacing with the world, alhaitham's very SELF, is incorrect. my suggestion is to flip a larger portion of that burden onto kaveh. kaveh đ character đ arcs đ
some examples/recommendations:
- make kaveh project his insecurities onto other people but especially onto alhaitham; he's overly reliant on other people for his own self worth, and he perceives alhaitham's lack of positive feedback as a direct reflection of how alhaitham feels about him. but learns along the way that alhaitham doesn't hate him, kaveh's actual struggle is with hating himself and being unable to his own self as worthy of love. maybe throw in how you are responsible for your own recovery, other people can help but you can't rely on them to carry you through self actualization.
- or, kaveh tries to make alhaitham behave more like a "normal" person, to be more pleasant and emotive and forthcoming, and then realizes he's in the wrong for trying to make alhaitham into something he's not, possibly for all the wrong reasons (not because he likes alhaitham better like that, but bc society says that's healthier and a better/more conforming way to be)
- or you could go ahead make alhaitham's issues the main problem but they're too complicated to overcome in a short period of time, so kaveh has to accept alhaitham is doing his best in his own way and not push for unrealistic and unhealthy changes. he could alter his own behavior to give alhaitham space and time and a safe place to land.
that got sappy so it's past time for me to dip out. go forth and ship things; but maybe consider letting alhaitham be a rude stone-faced bastard if he wants to be.
#genshin#alhaitham#kaveh#alhaitham x kaveh#kaveh x alhaitham#kavetham#haikaveh#fanfiction#fandom discussion#meta post#i finally used a readmore are you proud of me#as an avoidant attachment girlie alhaitham is my oshi#pls just allow him to not emote#let the man vibe#i feel certain there must be a real word for the concept of... socially enforced emotional conformity#unrealistic societal expectations and for your inner world which is none of their business#but i sure couldn't find it#if anyone has any words for this pls let me know it's kind of killing me#anyway#i get so mad when the avoidant attachment coded character is forced into (independently by themselves) the arc of:#i realize now that my way of interfacing with people is wrong and bad. yay! i will change that immediately for the big emotional finale#like! with what therapy!!#and why is THEIR world view the incorrect one!!#i have seen fics where it was all a big misunderstanding and actually alhaitham loves kaveh deeply#and kaveh just has to get over his insecurities and understand alhaitham's love language or whatever#and sure. good effort.#but i feel like a lot of those fics aren't very accurate to alhaitham's character#they're retrofitting alhaitham's core personality to better suit the traditional romance narrative#i also think part of the problem is that alhaitham is a pov that's divorced from regular emotionally well adjusted people#and it's difficult to understand or write povs that are drastically different from your own
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sorry, he's allergic to SOUP? no wonder he thinks he's destined for infinite sadness, i'd believe that too if my immune system thwarted me from slurpin down a nice hearty bowl of soup đ
#len speaks#obi-wan kenobi#obiwan kenobi#obi wan kenobi#star wars#rots novelization#matthew stover#reason no. 928 why i need 2 finish this book: obi-wan allergy lore#reason no. 929 why i need 2 finish this book: obi-wan 'the negotiator' kenobi causing political mayham thru his inability 2 admit his SOUP#allergy. like... bby girl WHY did you do that? you caused politicians to start throwing CHAIRS at each other đ truly clownish behavior!#i dont love when ppl exaggerate his disregard for his own physical wellbeing (its fine up to an extent i think) but this is actual legends#material where he knowingly ingests something that can kill him. he's not an inherent walking disaster imo but dear god he has his moments!#also i realize this means he's allergic to one soup and not all soups. let a man make a joke abt his blorbo in peace pls and thank u#sidenote: found and confirmed the allergy bit in the book. cannot find reference to chair throwing. might be in an encyclopedia or deleted#article. i will accept this chair-throwing incident as fact unless proven otherwise đđŒ
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I think, after FĂ«anor's fiery death, the FĂ«anorians burned their dead. Which went against the custom of burying the dead among the Eldar.
Burial was seen as the acceptable method of returning the hröa to Eru, to be reworked into the Song. But burning was frowned upon as it disintegrated the body IlĂșvatar had given. It was considered a deliberate destruction of His creation.
So FĂ«anor's act of self-combustion and his followers' insistence on well, following in his steps was yet another act of defiance on their part.
#silmarillion#silm headcanon#eldar customs#feanor#i tried looking into lace for funeral customs but couldn't find anything#if you happen to read sth let me know pls!#JustBizarre
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rook x lucanis: romance with a commentary track! solas and spite contribute with their thoughts and opinions along the way whether anyone wants them to or not. it's like a MST3K episode up in here as you try to get hot and heavy. in. in the pantry. love among the radishes at the end of the world (rifftrax version)
#still not sure who I'll romance first but I *am* starting to find lucanis just like. inherently hilarious. which is often how it starts.#for me. because of my many faults and flaws as a human being. I can't resist anything I find even slightly funny#dragon age#dragon age: the veilguard#dragon age: the veilguard spoilers#lucanis dellamorte#solas#dragon age spoilers#god please PLEASE let there be a fade section where solas and spite could interact just to complete my Vision here#anyway I think this concept could bring out the absolute troll side of solas that I love and treasure so much#if you annoy him too much in your little fade talks he'll start loudly critiquing your kissing technique in the back of your head#'oh is that how people go about it these days. well. not how I would have done it but to each their own of course'#pls pls I want pass agg dread wolf roasts constantly he's such a bitch he was born for this (affectionate)#I mean only lucanis and the player can hear spite apparently so it'd be more like lucanis looking into the camera like he's on the office#it's so cruel I think he's already going to be real weird at emotional intimacy as it is he shouldn't have to deal#with being bounced against the fourth wall like a little rubber ball on top of it all. sorry about your life (?) lucanis
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found family mentions in ragnarok
#god of war ragnarok#gow ragnarok#god of war#kratos#atreus#freya gow#brok huldra#sindri huldra#mimir gow#angrboda gow#all these moments made me CRY#pls let me know if you find any others like this#honorable mention to kratos calling brok his friend#(also I thought we were his family. we were)#my post
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#request#just as a note please understand that this specific wording was requested by someone#it is the term that makes them most comfortable#I understand that this may not be considered âproperâ or that it could maybe(?) be offensive to some.#to be honest I do not know that horribly much about the DID community T-T so pls let me know#I did try to poke around & see if this was something that people deemed as NOT OKAY but I couldn't find much info on the phrasing either wa#also I mean no hate or judgement to people who do like this term or use it by asking if its like okay or not I just genuinely i have no ide#but I think it is important to note that everyone has terms that make them most comfortable#okay disclaimer over thank you guys#userbox#jiraiblr#landmineblr
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