#lesson learned for sure
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arcanistsanctum is gone. we're back.
Update here.
Message below the cut is outdated.
Depressing news. I wake up today to not find the blog. I expected it to happen some time, but not this soon. If it got DMCA-ed, I'm supposed to receive a notice of the claims but I did not. So I plan to reach out to Tumblr Support soon regarding this.
Unfortunately, I didn't back up the blog. Not the contents nor the codes. I feel devastated. I regret not backing it up. I almost couldn't find the energy to claim it back. If we're not getting it back, honestly, I don't think I will be motivated enough to re-create it again. I'd say it was a good run and all that. But before that, I will try to get it back for you guys. And again, if not, I think the arcanistsanctum blog will deviate from archiving official media, especially if the reasons of the shutdown is DMCA or Copyright Infringement. I read the Reverse:1999 terms before, and all I can say is that they have ambiguous terms there, especially relating to copyright. Basically, they mentioned they reserve the right to take down content related to Reverse:1999 without explanation and warning. That may be the case here. I won't press too hard on that matter. It is their IP, after all. It is what it is.
This is the first time I had a tumblr blog taken down. I'm new to the processing and stuff, so (sigh) bear with me y'all.
Nothing changes for me uploading Reverse 1999 reaction videos in youtube. I'm still editing my reactions to 1.7 Version Update. I'll notify here once I publish the video.
I wish you guys well, and I apologize for the lack of preparation on my part. I'm not sure how soon we'll hear back from Tumblr. Until then, I can be contacted here. Of course, I'll update you guys on the status of arcanistsanctum here.
#arcanistsanctum#reverse 1999#good thing tomorrow i am scheduled to travel#that will help me cope#my heart truly sank#i love that blog#lot of my first time coding i poured into it#mannnnn#lesson learned for sure#but i'm still upset#this is as traumatic as that freaking orange
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playing around w slightly different hair renders
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#jjk art#yuji itadori#megumi fushiguro#itafushi#fushiita#yuuji#megumi#cries megumi fought tooth n nail..... i refused 2 flip the canvas tho >:(#i vastly prefer drawing him facing right bc fr some reason it makes his hair look better silhouette-wise#so having him face left is alr a Challenge#but also having him slightly look down (difficult angle + changes the silhouette) had me bashing my head in2 th TABLE#same thing happened earlier this month w gardening megu middle pose . i did not learn my lesson#but even worse w this one yuuji's head is blocking th main pointy part tht basically carries the entirety of the shape language#u can imagine my distress i am sure#anyway th render made me a lot happier with it thank god. colours hard carry bless <3333#i didn't plan on making it a full sheet but i needed 2 remind myself that im good at drawing megumi#so i threw in solos of each of them n tried slightly different render flavours#idk how Different all of them look visually but th process fr each ws Very different so i am satisfied#fight aside this ws useful i think! got 2 break out some Clunkier chalks n dust off a few of my smoother blended brushes#think i picked up some things i can keep also !! which ws. u kno. the Goal#tbh every time i do art studies i feel like i am kirby#one time i got called an art ditto by one of my fav artist mutuals when i did a style challenge#SUCH high praise from her it lives in my mind i take it out on days when i feel like trash#it doesnt Sound good when u say u r good at copying but real talk it is such a good skill i am very happy 2 have it in my arsenal
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Just now getting closer to normal. Cant imagine how that would have been without the shots
I would make it till now and finally get covid for the first time huh
#alamun#tbd#my chest is still an issue but ill take it over all the other torments#lesson learned for sure
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The weirdest thing that I've learned is that there are people (goyim) who thought Fiddler on the Roof was some happy or jolly tale like.
I can't watch Fiddler without having an hours-long panic attack. The music is good, the humor lands, but a happy tale it is not 😭😭😭
#jumblr#personal thoughts tag#i was watching a video about fiddler and it was very good#like yes i am sensitive about this stuff i will admit that but come ON#would i rewatch it again? sure. why? because i don't learn my lesson. if i have a panic attack that's between me and g-d
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do it all for love
#wanted to capture the feeling of being a little kid and wanting to use every crayon in the box#before learning restraint and method and expectation#something warm and exciting and familiar even though its new and strange and unlimited#i love dancing. its an art form i cant physically take part in especially not to the degree i would like to#but i love it. i love watching dancers move together. i love knowing the work that goes into being that faithful#and the smiling breathless exhilaration after it ends - i know that feeling. and i want to carry it for as long as i can.#what else have we got but love?#if i can impart any lesson. provide any truth. it is that i think you should be happy. and i hope you make sure thaf you are.#my art#my ocs#lion#anthro#cws:#bright colots
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Harem AU where Shen Yuan transmigrates into one of Bingge’s wives shortly after he returns from the other world. After a brief (and frantic) realization that’s she’s a woman (and always has been, but we’re not getting into that right now), she delves deep into this harem drama she’s been thrust into. It’s not until she comes face to face with Luo Bingge that she realizes just WHICH harem drama she’s living, and immediately sets about making his life as good as she can manage. Oh, harem infighting is causing strain on his containers? Simply nudge Liu Mingyan and Sha Hualing into working together to manage the harem. The Northern Desert is hinging on disaster because of clerical neglect? One of her harem sisters has a brother who’s in need of a job, no stress. Luo Binghe’s kids are unruly and there’s no clear successor? She has a college degree and a little sister, teaching a dozen or so demonic children is a breeze! All in the name of giving Luo Binghe the time to find a new wife, of course, one who will disperse with the need for this sprawling harem, and once that happens she’s free to travel and document monsters to her hearts content.
#it’s all fun and games until one of her students calls her ‘mom’#Eventually Luo Binghe comes to realize that he has the time to… relax?#His wives are no longer fighting at every possible convenience mostly due to Liu Mingyan and Sha Hualing ruling with an iron fist.#Their fathers and brothers on his council are less pushy less demanding and he hasn’t had to behead anyone in weeks.#Mobei-Jun has sequestered himself in the Northern Desert with the clerk he picked up a month ago#but he doesn’t need to deal with that right now#And… his children are going to school?#sure he had teachers before#the best money could buy#but none of them could get his kids to behave#now they’re… sitting in a full day of lessons#and learning both human AND demonic cultivation??#and politics and etiquette and biology and math and and and#They’re being taught by one of his wives who never gave him a child but treats every brat as if they’re one of her own#And… hey that’s a familiar smile half hidden behind a fan isn’t it?#wit writes#bingqiu#svsss#bingyuan#binggeyuan#trans Shen yuan#I just need to make that my calling card lmao
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Previous // Next
Sidney: What were you thinking? Robin: It wasn’t my fault. Sidney: Debateable. You shouldn’t take them with you if you’re not going to keep an eye on them. Robin: I don’t have a million eyes! Oscar: Ma. Sidney: Well. Oscar: You’re looking at this all wrong, anyway-.. Byrd, what’re we not gonna do in future? Byrd: Uhhhhh-.. handstands on wobbly fences? Courtney: Robin? Robin: Let Byrd climb on shitty fences. Oscar: See? Sidney: [mutters] Give me strength. Wren: What do you need strength for? Sidney: Your father’s unquenchable thirst for chaos. Oscar: You need to relax every now n’ then, you might actually enjoy yourself for once. Sidney: Bah, you sound like Ally. Alton: Hm-.. what? Sidney: Nothing-.. where’s the salad? Oscar: What’s done is done-.. let’s just agree to steer clear of the hospital for a while, okay guys? I’m sick of the place. Robin: Maybe we could get a member’s card. Ava: I want to go! Oscar: Noooo, you don’t. Ava: How do you know what I want?! Sidney: Ask Robin to watch you for a day, you’ll be there in no time. Oscar: Ignore your grandma-.. she’s just an expert at putting the salt in Salton. Alton: I still don’t understand that joke…
#ts4#sims 4#simblr#ts4 story#sims story#forever in between#fib#oscar finch#courtney finch#robin finch#wren finch#byrd finch#ava finch#sidney finch#alton finch#she's salty because she cares#😆#this wasn't even gonna be a scene but the brain rot took over when salton came for dinner so here we are#lmao#safe to say that sid doesn't agree with oskie's parenting style but he doesn't wanna be a helicopter parent u kno#kids have gotta fuck up to learn n whatnot#i think he semi wants to be pissed off but a) he's not gonna do that in front of sid n give her the satisfaction lol#and b) he's prettyyyy sure lessons were learnt here so maybe they'll just let it slide#THIS time neway#i think they're being a lil soft truth be told but alas.. he wants to do the opposite of what he had so....#we'll see how it goes ig#😅#ok am shutting up now
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diversity win your spam emails are queer
#deltarune#spamton#swatch#art#doodles#pansexual#lgbt#bigshot spamton#stupid joke ive had sitting in my head for months whjbfghbjdfg. artist brain override gay brain (me too). good for him though!!#me refilling my printer ink tanks: omg my printer is pan... soooo coool....#and dont forget that he owned the mettaton dress of transgenderism either. arguably this has the trans flag colors too#wait theres a car joke here also. TransAm? more like TransPan. haha nice#+ his glasses fit the theme so Bonus Spam + i changed my 90s swat a little again#they're just gonna be different every time i draw them. for funsies. and thats fine. i havent even posted 90s queen yet SMFH !!!!!#there's something to be said about metaphors in their 90s fashion choices. something something more colorful design back then#something something not hiding their eyes yet something something Learned A Lesson....#you could read that a certain way. or perhaps not#obligatory 'my swatch uses they them' tag#obligatory 'fine to tag as ship if you want idc' tag#obligatory 'oh god i swear im trying so hard to draw and post more' tag#i saw a tag on a post from like 2019 that said 'man i only posted 9 times last month!' and im like. god. i wish i could post 9 times a#month Now???? honey you had a big storm comin#i just keep starting things i dont have the energy to finish. except for a silly gay color profile joke apparently#im sure the Smoke Smell goes reeeal good with the Dumpster Smell btw.
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OMGGG Your latest smut fic is so amazing!!! The smut is absolutely delicious! but....the angst is breaking my heart so...could you please write a continuation or part two where the reader confronts Aventurine's dark internal thoughts and comforts them? A fic where they actually get him to believe that they love him for real, where they tell him that he's not a monster and that he wasn't ruining them.
You've got it ! (˵ •̀ ᴗ - ˵ ) ✧
Aventurine x Reader
You treat Aventurine with more respect than he deserves. (Part 2)
Read part 1 here !
CW: dehumanisation (internal, thoughts Aventurine has of himself, referring to himself as a “monster”), lots of mentions of death, passively suicidal Aventurine, violent imagery (through metaphors, nobody is actually physically harmed), intrusive thoughts, Aventurine thinks kind of vicious things about you (refers to you as "stupid", "brainless", "naive" etc), cursing.
Lmk if there’s anything else I should warn about !!
Small note: Spoiler alert sorry, but you will not completely fix Aventurine in this fic. Making any real progress would take YEARS. The trauma he's gone through and his beliefs about his own humanity are EXTREMELY deep-seated, just one conversation would not be enough to make him truly believe he was loved. Super sorry since I'm sure that's not what you wanted (you specifically requested they "truly get him to believe that they love him for real", but this does still end on a hopeful note so I hope you won't be too disappointed (•ᴗ•,, ) )
Sometimes Aventurine gains enough clarity to remember where he stands. More importantly, he gains enough clarity to remember where you should stand. That is to say, as far away from him as possible. Unfortunately, you are never keen on doing that.
In these moments of clarity, he distances himself. If you won’t do it, he has to. He needs to. He needs to even when he can feel the little pieces of him that you’ve managed to haphazardly glue together splinter into tiny shards again, even when it feels like every step away is a step walked on shattered glass. He can hardly be called a ‘person’ anyways, what does his suffering matter? He has already lost so many good things, why not add another loss to the tally?
He reads your texts, but he doesn’t respond. He hangs up on you the moment you call. By doing this, he makes sure you know he is alive. Both because he knows it would devastate you if you thought he died, but even more so to make sure you know he is intentionally ignoring you. He hopes at least some part of you hates him. He thinks part of him hates you.
But he can never stay away for long. Like a werewolf called by the full moon; like a vampire to blood; like a siren to a sailor. Thoughts of you always cloud his mind too much to do what is right. He reminds himself he will destroy you. He comes back anyways. He is too selfish not to.
And you welcome him with open arms every time. Sure, sometimes you yell. Sometimes you berate him. Sometimes you cry. But he never does something beyond the bounds of what you’ll forgive, even though he tries to. You’re patient to a fault. Though he feels bad, he never takes it fully seriously, because you always hold him with so much sweetness, even when your words are filled with righteous anger and justified hurt. You always end it by reminding him that you love him. Something clenches in his chest; something that is not his heart, because he has none. He claims he is sorry, but you both know he will do this again. He always does. You know he will hurt you over and over, even if you don’t know the extent. You know he will test you, that he will ignore you, that he will cling to you and that he will taunt you. You don’t know he will drag his claws through you and tear you to ribbons; you don’t know he will sink his teeth into your neck and drink all your blood; you don’t know he will lure you to sea and drown you. You are never aware of the true danger you are in.
Maybe that’s why you one day feel comfortable enough to corner the creature that has taken on the appearance of a lover. You sit down next to him in bed one evening after one of his many attempts to push you away, your expression grim. You look straight ahead, right into his dead eyes, unaware that a monster is towering over you.
“We can’t go on like this,” you say. For one moment, the crushing relief and devastation threatens to consume him, and he’s not sure which of the feelings is stronger. For one moment he can’t breathe.
He hacks our a laugh, his skin straining. Something is shifting beneath his flesh, something ugly and dangerous. He needs to leave and he needs to do it quickly.
“You’re right, we can’t,” he agrees, his voice a lot more steady than he feels. He feels the urge to grab you and shake you until you pass out. He feels the urge to suck out your life force until your body is an empty husk. He feels the urge to slam your head into the bathroom sink in the next room over. He feels the urge to shoot himself in the head, because he does not want to do any of that.
“I love you,” you say, unexpectedly. Or maybe it’s not unexpected. You always say such stupid, brainless things. (You say it with sweetness. The only sweetness he can offer in return is the sweetness of bacteria digesting rotting meat. Is the flesh his, or will it be yours?) He laughs again.
“I thought we were breaking up,” he says. Smirking, as if it’s funny. (It isn’t.)
“No, we’re really not,” you say firmly. He snorts.
“Maybe we should.”
You don’t answer. Instead, you come closer.
Get away, he thinks. Run, you fucking idiot.
You don’t have many flaws, but the ones you do have are insurmountably big. You are too forgiving, you are too kind, you are too selfless, you are too naive. You will kill yourself doing this one day. You will let him kill you.
Your arms wrap around him. He can’t help but relax. The thing lurking under his human disguise grows more restless.
“I don’t hate you,” you say, unexpectedly. And this one really is unexpected, because what made you say that? Your arms squeeze around him tighter. “I thought I was being obvious enough about that, but you’re so bad at understanding it.”
The feeling he has is the same as the feeling he gets when he realises a deal is going awry. You are the highest risk stakes he has ever made a bet on: will he ruin you, or will you ruin him? What you could do to him is so much more serious than death. He knows that he is holding a losing hand. He doesn’t even know what he stands to win.
You kiss his neck. He shudders.
“Why are you so scared of me?” you ask.
Scared? He is not scared. What an outright laughable concept. Neither of you are scared, but if one of you was, it should be you, but you aren’t, for some reason.
“What gives you that idea?” he chuckles, but his voice is not as steady this time, and he can feel his smile slipping. (What is wrong with him? He doesn’t want to think about it. The answer is always ‘everything’.)
“Your hand is shaking.”
It is, but that is not because he is afraid. Fear is a human response, borne from the desire to live. It is instinctual. It means kicking and screaming, it means clawing your way out of hell for the chance to see another day, it means fighting for the life you don’t want to end. He cannot die, you see. Death cannot occur twice. Just because his body reacts, that does not necessarily mean he can truly fear any longer.
(Then again, maybe his reaction does not come from the thought of his death.)
“I’m not scared,” he says, and his voice sounds a lot weaker than he had expected. You pull him closer, cradling his head against the crook of your neck. His blood is pulsing too quickly.
“It would be okay if you were,” you murmur. “I know you don’t know how to be loved. That’s okay. I’ll teach you. You just have to let me.”
Squash. Slice. Tear.
Maybe you are the monster. He can feel your claws prying his chest open; he can feel your teeth dig into his flesh; he can feel something that is not air fill his lungs. The biggest difference between you and him is that he devours, while you give. You painfully shove something back into the cavity meant to contain his soul, you pump blood back into his system, and you fill whatever gaps are left in him with something that is first cold but quickly warms.
(He realises, belatedly, that something is pumping inside his chest again. But it can’t be a heart, can it? He lost that so long ago.)
“I’ll kill you,” he manages through gritted teeth, claws digging into your shirt. It is not a threat. It is not a warning. It is just the truth.
“You think too much,” you admonish him. Your tone is as gentle as your words are cutting. “I wish you would trust me more. You’re so determined to ruin your own life, and I don’t like it.”
“That’s just how I am. Deal with it or leave.”
“I’ll deal with it, then.”
Like a werewolf called by the full moon; like a vampire to blood; like a siren to a sailor. He will destroy you. But you accept it.
He has tried time and time again to push you away, but he is weak. So incorrigibly weak, and though your flaws are insurmountable, his are all-consuming. He is a monster in all the ways that matter. But you stubbornly will not leave despite that.
(Maybe that makes him a little more willing to try to change his nature. Just a little. Just for you. If you will not leave anyways, maybe he could try to make his presence a little less torturous.)
“Just… please stop ignoring me,” you sigh, nuzzling into his hair. Tenderly, tenderly, tenderly, so tenderly it makes his skin crawl. Your claws are softly piercing into him and he is helpless, unable (unwilling) to fight back. “I can deal with everything else. I just hate it when you do that. I can’t keep going weeks without speaking to you. I know you have some kind of… weird ideas that I’d be better off without you, but that’s not true. I love you, and I love being around you. I can’t help you when you cut me off at every corner.”
Cut, slice, slash.
Something in him breaks. Something he knows cannot be salvaged. Something he knows you would not want to salvage. Something he is not sure if he wants to salvage either, now that it is broken anyways.
He breathes a shaky breath, his fingers — his fingers, not claws, not this time — digging into your back. He buries his face into the crook of your neck, and he does not feel the urge to bite down. Though his eyes feel wet, it would not be enough water to drown you.
He knows your line of logic is wrong. He knows the fact remains unchanged: he is a monster of a man. He will ruin you. But maybe your presence sparks enough electricity to keep his heart pumping, just for a little while, and maybe he can wait until things actually start going downhill before he lets you go. Maybe he can remember how to be a human for a bit, maybe he can pretend he is.
“I just… don’t want to do something I can’t take back,” he whispers. “Not with you. You’re the… the only good thing I have left. I don’t know what I’d do if I…”
“That’s sweet, but I’m not as weak as you think I am,” you reply. “I’ve held out this long, haven’t I? Put more faith in me.”
He smiles.
“Yeah, I guess you’re right.”
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My inbox is open, feel free to send in asks or requests, I'd love to ramble about things <3 Also reblogs are EXTREMELY appreciated the final push I needed to finish this was from a very kind individual who reposted and analysed my writing I've been riding that high ever since they did that ily bro
#[rawbin]#[aventurine]#[rawbin fanfic]#[by me]#aventurine x reader#Tried some sort of weird monster metaphor by bringing up werewolf vampire and siren imagery idk if that worked out the way I wanted but -#whatever part of the process is making weird decisions and learning what did and didn't work out#Not entirely happy with this but I wasn't with the previous part either so yolo I don't have the patience to scrap this and start over#Tried to make the dialogue sound like things real actual human being would say but idk if I succeeded#Especially when reader reassures him what person actually speaks so eloquently ?? not me that's for sure#And the part where Aventurine is like “😢 i-i-i don't w-w-wanna hurt you pookiebear!!!” he would not say that straight out#but whatever I'm tired and I can tell I will not be finding the motivation to work for this one more night#plsss continue sendinf requests guys it makes me happy#Currently working on qpps Aventurine (whoever sent that request I actually love you)#(reason it's taking so long is because I've written so much in the tumblr app and my phone keeps overheating so I need to take breaks HELP)#(I've learnt my lesson and will try to stick to writing in my notes app when I suspect I might write a lot <3)#Jesus these tags are an essay sorry I just CANNOT shut up I looove speaking I love it love it love it#aventurine honkai star rail#aventurine hsr#aventurine star rail#hsr aventurine#aventurine#aventurine fanfic#reader x aventurine#honkai star rail x reader#honkai star rail#hsr x you#hsr x reader#hsr#star rail
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changing something crucial about Springdad's lore.
When he was, let's say, 10-12 years old, he was hanging around with his friends when they decided to do the usual stupid children activities, like jumping over fences. William climbed a protection fence, lost his balance, and cut his ear on the sharp edges. The cut was so bad they had to cut half of his ear off. That's how he got half a bunny ear.
#pretty sure he still laughs it off every time someone asks him about the ear#'let me tell you kid- it hurt like hell... and yeah i did not learn the lesson and jumped over that same fence a week after it all happened#springdad au
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can you guys please for the love of christ start checking the bio of someone who has posted a dumbass take to make sure they aren't an actual child before you decide to do sick dunks on them to your audience of thousands
#yes this is about the maus post on twitter#they were 17#and seem to have learned an important lesson about researching before kneejerk posting#at the cost of thousands of people my own age qrting and telling them to self harm#this is what i mean when i said kids aren't allowed to make fools of themselves online anymore#if this happened on a forum of 100 users in 2005 they would just be corrected and it would be forgotten#'Well i wouldnt have made that mistake when i was 17' good for you im sure you made no mistakes ever
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I'm so immersed in my jason grace new rome uni fic that I'm studying ancient roman law terms using this as an excuse. help.
#I'm COMMITTED fr#I become smart just for these fanfics i swear. i thank the fanfic and fandom community for my thirst for knowledge 😮💨✨#I also remember listening to latin asmrs and learning latin words for reyna and jason :) I need help fr#i hate how I feel the need to want to know EVERYTHING tho 😭 like why do I have to overthink everything#I'm not sure if I should include ancient roman law or common law for jason tho#or he could just learn both as separate classes. the roman law can come under the history category#so he has to learn a bit of everything#political science criminal law economics history civil law corporate law banking law#I'm tired. law students I have always had nothing but respect for you#I won't go TOO deep into what he's studying in the fics tho like I won't mention his lessons in the fic every 5 mins#prolly just him doing presentations and projects then and there#bc like if I go too deep in then I'll get into a writing slump again#bc info dumping is EXHAUSTING it would feel like a school assignment not a fic#pjo#pjo fandom#percy jackson#pjo series#jason grace#pjo hoo#pjo hoo toa#annabeth chase#leo valdez#piper mclean#frank zhang#hazel levesque#jason grace x y/n#jason grace fanfic#jason grace x you#jason grace x reader#࿔‧ ֶָ֢˚˖𐦍˖˚ֶָ֢ ‧࿔ elora's PhD in overthinking
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forgive me if you've been asked this before or if its annoying, but how did you learn to use colored pencils like that? your art is so special to me.
ty :) I took an art class for a few years where our teacher had us buy prismacolor pencils as one of the art supplies and had us use them kinda like paints, pressing down hard right away and blending the colors together. its not how youre supposed to use them she was just trying to teach us to use color and ig this was more to the point. I picked them up again years after i stopped going to that class just bc they were there and i wanted to play around w them a bit and ended up actually enjoying it when doing it on my own terms lol
#it was a weird class#it was just this russian lady doing private lessons in her house that my mom learned about somehow#I did NOT like those classes all we did was still life and they were hours long which is esp rough when im in high school and busy#and she wanted us to stand while working the whole time bc tradition i guess?#she did allow me to work sitting but thought i was lazy for it. idk dude i dont want to exhaust myself fast for no reason#standing is a lot more tiring than walking#i def did still benefit from those classes just from learning to accurately draw from life#did not like the teacher tho#on one hand shed paid for the art supplies for kids whos families were too poor to (and these are nice expensive supplies)#which is very nice#but on the other she was very homophobic and open about it#like when they legalized gay marriage she went on a rant about how horrible it is that they can adopt kids now#and also kind of racist#she was telling me how she got blocked from a facebook group bc she made a post asking if she could speak to a white person#and she didnt realize she was posting that publicly she thought it was a private message to the group owner#im honestly still not sure i heard/understood her correctly bc it was so bizzare and the only time i ever remember her being racist#she talked abt it like she genuienly was unaware it was racist#she described it as a misunderstanding bc she accidentally posted it publicly instead of privately#like it wouldnt have been racist to ask that at all#also one time she talked about how she saw demons in her home once#also she doesnt vaccinate her kids bc of microchips#she was like a walking russian stereotype lol#anyway heres some ink the artist lore
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okay no see the thing that made me really, really sad about hinata and the thing that made me really, really root for him and love him and want to see him win it all was how, like, people kept DENYING him. and i'm not talking about spectators in the stands going "omg he's so short haha, can he really do anything?" i'm talking about how his own team and how everyone who knew them in some way - as much as i love them - could never really separate him from kageyama. they were the freak quick duo, karasuno's number nine and number ten. they were amazing! so brilliant, the two of them. and hinata thought it was a way out, at first. he thought it was a way over the summit. he thought it was the key to being someone better.
but a key goes both ways, you know. it can lock you up just as much as it can set you free.
and hinata had to be so, so frustrated. everyone was finding ways to move forward except him. everyone expected him to stay stuck. and you could argue that that's not entirely true, sure, that he was always training, always trying to catch up, and they encouraged that. but nobody ever expected him to be more. nobody ever expected him to go beyond what he had with kageyama - they all thought that was enough for hinata. they thought he was fine like that because it worked for the rest of them. they underestimated how much he wanted to be capable. they didn't get how much he wanted to stand on his own two feet.
and that wasn't fair to hinata! it wasn't fair that hinata, who loved to play and loved the game and loved volleyball so so much, was the only one being left behind! he wanted to change that but nobody was trying with him!!! so of course he got impatient!! of course he was reckless!!! of course he was carving his own opportunities!!! there was no way forward otherwise!!! because if we take a minute to think about how training would have gone while kageyama was at tokyo, let's be honest — it probably wouldn't have gone well. nobody else can do with hinata what kageyama could do with him. hinata would have been held back. he would have felt useless. practicing serves and receives was stuff he was already doing constantly before that, and it wasn't teaching him anything. yeah hinata was a little bit selfish and a little bit shameless but being so finally got him somewhere!!
all hinata ever wanted to do was fly, even if it meant straying from the flock to do so
#anyways lesson learned: when you've exhausted all other options then just fucking go for it#what's the worst that could happen#you either get shit done or you don't#ball boy arc is sooooo important and i hate when ppl treat it like hinata was just being stupid#he was FED UP!!!#washijo sure as hell wasn't going to let him prove anything so he had to do it himself#and hinata actually showed a LOT of restraint for how he actually is imo#he accepted washijo's decision so easily. i think he knew in a way. that he wouldn't have been accepted#but he had to try SOMETHING bc he wasn't getting anywhere with everyone else!!!!#and my heart breaks whenever i think about taking suga taking kageyama's part in the early part of the story#about them not needing to try anything new or do anything risky so close to the tournament#hinata was so fucking shackled and that's why brazil was so good for him#it gave him a chance to grow into himself#ALSO EVERYONE KEEPS ACTING SURPRISED WHEN HE GETS BETTER AND BETTER WHEN THAT'S ALL HE EVER WANTED HELLO#hinata shouyou#haikyuu#haikyuu!!#haikyuu meta#sou says stuff
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Musical Touken Ranbu: Michinooku ~ Hitotsu Hachisu (Michinooku ~ A Single Lotus)
Here we go! Only a few days after the archive release and toumyu's ninth anniversary (congratulations!)
Michioku, or Michihasu, is a myu I have many conflicting feelings about, both positive and negative. However, I do believe that with the right amount of care in the next Mika-related story myu, the negative can still be cleared. Plus, I'm glad about a lot of things being re-established. The writer does need to step up her game a little on the plot-writing side of things, as well as the understanding-and-respecting-past-myu side of things, but as long as she does, this can still be given a proper place within what was already established.
Keep in mind that these are only the subtitle files, timed and tled to the DMM senshuuraku and the bluray respectively. The archive version will have a talk at the start, so the starting times of the subs will have to be delayed accordingly.
You can find the subtitles and my TL notes document here!
#touken ranbu#toumyu#water's translations#michioku#michihasu#how do I put this#seeing as myu's director Kayano has said in an interview right before Michioku that Kogi and Mika have a special bond#different from other swords-- and then they try to speedrun *Tsuru* and Mika having a what feels like it was intended to be#even greater relationship using a song called Kage Futatsu where KOGI'S signature song from Utaawase was Futatsu no Kage???#I SINCERELY want to believe it's incompetence rather than the writer deliberately pulling the rug from under Kogi's feet#bc the alternative is just cruel#I don't particularly mind the relationship Mika and Tsuru have in this play but I feel that not for a moment Kogi and kara respectively#were considered in the writing#anyway my final verdict is that this myu is what too many people think tsuwa is: the divorce myu (between Mika and Tsuru this time)#in all cases I hope myu can bring Shirakawa Yuki in again like with Datemyu just to offload myu's already deathly busy writer (she's done#5 myus in a month before which is just insane) because I feel this just isn't sustainable with the amount of carefulness a long-running#franchise like myu demands and the *writing* quality (not the production quality AT ALL Michioku's is great) is suffering for it.#like sure Michioku is loaded with references but they're references that either don't serve *Michioku's own* plot or their treatment shows#a lack of understanding of the work it's referencing-- for example Kashuu calling upon atsu's “This is how the shinsengumi fights!” actuall#goes completely contrary to the lesson he's supposed to have learned from atsuibun: that swords aren't disposable and that he has duties as#both soldier (captain in atsu) and as COMRADE and he makes the (already highlighted in Michioku!) dumb decision of butting in without#thinking-- and with that framed against manba's breaking trauma as well! He's supposed to have learned to stay rational and consider both#duties yet here he is ---BECAUSE of the reference--- completely leaning on the pre-atsu-development side of the scale#as if Ishi's words went one ear in one ear out. And yes the scene by itself could've worked as a subversion to show Kashuu makes the#'irrational' decision against what Ishi taught him to consider precisely because he cares for the people he's protecting but there is NO#groundwork laid at all for that in the rest of Michioku! This is what I mean with the carelessness of the references and the lack of#consideration for what prior myus were trying to SAY and ACHIEVE which is insane because she was the lyricist for those#it's more a collage of feelings provided through a set of characters calling back to the scripts of prior myu rather than#a story that evokes feelings bc the humans in it walk forward and act upon-- interact with-- the scenery on the road as left by prior human
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also I think Tori should get in trouble at R&D because her stance on human testing is that you should only do it if you’re pretty sure it’s gonna work, and except she learned how to communicate in Oto so instead of a normal conversation or reporting to an authority, she’s like “you shouldn’t test anything on your comrades you wouldn’t do to yourself. Go on, demonstrate” and Minato is like “whyyyy did you try to force your colleague to use a faulty seal on themseeeeeeelves”
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