#wanted to capture the feeling of being a little kid and wanting to use every crayon in the box

[canonkiller]

do it all for love

[inkskinned]

it's just that there's a few more steps you have to take that other people don't have to take, but they don't see the steps, so they think you should be able to hop from moment to moment, a chickadee.

it isn't getting out of bed. it is the weight, the hook in your chest, the anchor. you have to move the anchor first. you have to silence your alarm, but your phone is in your hand, which means now you have to put the phone down, which is too-hard. you get stuck in there for a while, the white screen, mindlessly scrolling. you don't even like this activity, have tried a few other options but - here you are, and time is passing.

you've googled iron deficiency causes depression and if i drink enough water does it help with mental illness and anxiety but no caffiene within the last two weeks, like how you googled am i gay quiz at 17.

it isn't just calling the doctor back, it's the anxiety, it's these little moths in your lung cavities, furious and fluttering. you need to figure out how to capture your fingers from between their nervous bodies. you are an adult, you can say the words yes hi, i'm calling because i need - but you need to practice first. maybe write it down because what if you misspeak, wouldn't that be embarrassing. write it down, but you need to find a pen first. well, actually, your desk is kind of messy. you should get a new pen. you should get a new organizational system. you should try journaling.

your grades in school were always strange. the way teachers would say things like it feels like you're not trying. you could touch stars in the stuff you cared about. well, sometimes. god be willing. homework average zero. oops! your english teacher's wrinkled brow: i know you know this stuff. what the fuck are you doing?

it isn't the showering, it's the mirror before the shower and the soft horrible pull of your naked physique. you have to avoid eye contact completely or else it'll be 93 minutes later and you'll have picked at your skin until every little pore is bleeding. you have to stand up but standing is tiring and also you should have remembered to buy more soap but you never remember anything. maybe get out of the shower and while it's still running and you're still dripping wet, use your phone to take a note. make a note to get your groceries. let the shower run while you stand half-in half-out and get lost in your phone for a moment. come back out when the water runs cold and now you have to sprint to get ready.

your grandmother's frown. you're just being lazy. protestant work ethics in a house that isn't even protestant. she says she just learned different but she means learned better, doesn't she.

it's not that you can't send the email, it's that your hands have been hurting lately and the desk really is messy and also why the fuck would you even care about this thing? doesn't everyone else feel like they're drowning? hi brendon thanks so much for sending! will review and get back to you shortly. but now you're on the internet, close the tab with tumblr on it. go on, close it. feel the little soft vapor of boredom come up and over your eyeteeth and make everything overwhelming and itchy.

literally all you have to do is put on shoes to go outside. you're literally already dressed, that's the hard part of this whole thing. literally just put the shoes on. just... do it! do it! this shit is easy!

it's literally that easy. just stop taking all those stupid invisible steps. stop following your strange made-up rules. times like this, even you're positive you're faking. you just don't want to bother with the cleaning and the cooking and the being-an-adult.

but then - shouldn't you be able to put these stupid shoes on? nobody's even looking. go on kid. life is out there! just take the leap!

get moving.

[hrrtshape]

FAME DR — moments, in which i knew, i’ve made it. 

⋆  hearing my song at a random café – i’m just vibing, sipping an espresso, and suddenly my voice floats through the speakers. people around me are humming along, totally unaware that it’s…..ME!!!! me!!!??

⋆  seeing my face on a billboard in times square – i’m there with friends, acting all casual, but inside i’m screaming because it’s just… me. huge. in times square. 

⋆  getting DMs from celebrities i used to fangirl over – notifications blow up, and there’s that blue check, THEM, sliding into my DMs saying they’re obsessed with my new song or film or whatnot want to meet up.

⋆  having a designer send me clothes with a handwritten note – just open a package to find an exclusive jacket with a note: “this piece is so you. can’t wait to see you wear it.” WHAT?

⋆  walking into a room and people literally gasping – at a party or event or literally just a whatever place, and the whole place goes quiet for a beat when i walk in. heads turning, whispers starting—everyone is in awe. okay, beyonce. okay…

⋆  finding fan art of myself online – fans post these breathtaking drawings and edits, capturing every tiny detail of an outfit, facial expressions, and they’re actually better than anything an official team could come up with. 

⋆  watching paparazzi chase after me in a cute outfit – i just.. step out, dressed, and suddenly there’s a whole crew of photographers losing their minds trying to get shots of. 

⋆  hearing my voice as someone’s ringtone in public – walking in the streets, chilling, and someone’s phone goes off with my song. 

⋆  a little kid dressed as yours truly for halloween – like, full-on little diva mode and their parents are so proud of their mini-star!!!!!! internal screaming.

⋆  seeing fans camped out with signs hours before an event – i’m arriving, and there’s personalised signs. i feel like madonna or someone. like, people like me that much!!!! me!!!! 

⋆  seeing a poster of me in someone’s room — it can be super casual; film or one of those music posters but they still have it in their rooms?? on their walls??? 

⋆  hearing other artists name-drop me in their interviews – people i’ve perhaps looked up to, who inspired me, are now saying things like, “well, I’d love to work with her; she’s killing it right now.” it’s giving favourite artist’s favourite artist !!!!

⋆  my favourite high-fashion brand using my song in their runway show – watching videos of the models walking to my beat during paris fashion week. It's iconic. it's cinematic. it’s unreal. it makes me squeal for a bit. just a bit.

⋆  random people copying my hairstyles and outfits – i go on instagram and tik tok to find tutorials on how to get my curls, my makeup, or even my attitude. fashion style. body type?! oh my god. i’m a BLUEPRINT!!! 

⋆  fans quoting my interviews back to me – they remember all of those cheesy one-liners and even throw them back in comments and in person. 

⋆  being the reason someone starts making music or art – a fan gushing, saying, “i only started singing because of you.” 

⋆  catching people on the metro secretly taking photos of me – i’m reading or vibing with a friend, and i glimpse at someone trying to snap a photo discreetly. i get that little downturned smile because?? hello?? COME HERE I DON’T BITE??

⋆  fans running entire accounts just for paparazzi photos – i find out about multiple fan pages dedicated to catching and sharing every single glimpse of me, from coffee runs to red carpet shots. wild. also very smile-inducing.

⋆  people naming their pets after me – i hear fans saying they have a dog, cat, or even a fish named after me. it’s cute, and it makes me feel like i’ve officially entered pop culture.

⋆  meeting someone who cries when they see me – they’re sobbing, overwhelmed, and i’m trying to hold their hands, saying, “it’s okay, it’s okay, oh my god, stop crying, i’m going to start crying!!” 

⋆  being used as stantwt gif’s — okay. yea, i’ve made it. no comment.

⋆  people selling out an outfit as soon as i wear it – i wore a certain dress, and boom, it’s immediately sold out everywhere. i’m officially. officialy setting trends without even trying.

⋆  fans knowing my coffee order by heart – people are out there replicating my exact coffee order and sharing recipes, so everyone can feel a little more like me??. spreading soy milk propaganda <3 

⋆  being an inspiration behind fan tattoos – people are getting my quotes, my NAME, or even my films or albums inked on their bodies. okay. OKAY….wow.? 

⋆  people taking photos at places just because i’ve been there – spots i’ve casually visited are suddenly iconic locations for fans, and they recreate my exact poses.

⋆  finding out my song were played at someone’s wedding – it’s their special day, and my voice is part of their love story??? 

⋆  getting letters from people who say i’ve changed their lives – fans sending handwritten letters, saying how i saved them, made them stronger, or helped them believe in themselves. <3 :( :) (:AWE. 

⋆  noticing my name carved on trees – i’m literally engraved in people’s memories and spaces. can i cry now? 

[kaiser1ns]

#. PINK BOW, MY HEART GOES POW !

featuring 𝘄𝗶𝗻𝗱𝗯𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗸𝗲𝗿 𝘅 𝗳𝗲𝗺!𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗱𝗲𝗿 ıllı. takiishi chika, endo yamato

fluff + slight suggestive. just you wrapping a pink ribbon bow around their bicep, the sight makes you insane.

TAKIISHI CHIKA

You have been dying to try this trend, even had a dream of your boyfriend being all adorned with cute little bows in his hair. But, now you sit in front of him with pleading hands and eyes, holding light pink lace as he just stares at you, a little blankly as he sits on the couch with his arms outstretched and the tank top he's wearing doesn't help at all. You try not to jump on top of him and start kissing and hugging him because he looks so hot, so incredibly hot.

"Please, please, please." you would never beg to a man, but right now your needs were getting the better of you, you had to do it and see it. It would look so cute, with him having a pink ribbon around his bicep. "I will let you do whatever you want, just please make my dreams come true!"

"Fine," he put one of his shoulders forward to you, not the first time you touched him there, nor would it be the last, but right now you just wanted to die. For some reason, you really loved his arms, especially at night when he was holding you close and couldn't let you go, nor did he want to. Once you enter his world, you can't leave. That was the golden rule in your relationship, as strange as it was at times.

You almost couldn't believe that he let you do such a thing, he is like a genie granting you the greatest wish in your whole life.  Quickly moving to sit beside him, unable to stop the squeaks and the giggles, you carefully placed the ribbon against his skin, smoothing it out as you started tying it into a bow. The sight of that pink ribbon on the muscles of his arms was so cute that you could hardly contain yourself.

He watched you, without any visible emotion on his face, as you fussed over getting the bow just right. To him, it was just a piece of fabric, nothing special. But to you, it was a symbol of how the most innocent and smallest things could make your heart swell with love for him.

“Oh my God, you look so cute!” you literally screamed, hands over your mouth, sitting back to admire your piece of art. Grabbing your phone immediately to start snapping pictures, capturing every moment from every possible angle. “Baby, you are just so adorable, I’m going to cry.”

He was so confused, just a ribbon can make you behave like a little kid with a sugar rush, obsessing over something as small as a bow.  “Why is this making you happy?” 

“You don’t get it, do you?” you teased, setting down your phone aside and leaning closer to him, heart beating so loud and so fast to the point it may burst at any given second. Poor Chika doesn't know that he can give his girlfriend a heart attack, just by being him. “It’s just my way of appreciating you and your beautiful and strong arms that keep me safe, day and night.”

“It’s just a bow, wrapped around my bicep.” he let out a sigh, shaking his head slightly, “It's nothing special, but if you say so.”

But you weren't paying attention to his words anymore, instead, you focused on how close you were to him now, just inches apart but you could feel the heat and the warmth radiating from his body. You wanted to do more than just look at him and without thinking, you sat on his lap, wrapping your arms around his neck, resting your head on his shoulder. You didn't miss seeing the tattoo, on the back of his arm as you smiled softly when you turned to look at his face now, the need to be close to him was overwhelming.

“Why don’t we just cuddle?” you whispered, looking him through your lashes, nibbling on his cheek. If he was cute, then he didn’t know what you were. “Just you and me, and that pink bow that ties us together.” 

What magic did you put on him to soften around you? The arm with the ribbon, wrapped around your waist as he relaxed. It ties us together, you say. He smirked, then he should also tie you later, to see what's so exciting about this lace, to show you how much he loves you too.

ENDO YAMATO

It was his idea for you to tie a ribbon to his bicep, and it's probably the best thing he has come up with. Endo didn't have such sculpted and tight muscles before, yes he was strong, but now... You were drooling at the sight of his buffy and tattooed arms. He knew what he was doing, he always did. Sitting on the kitchen counter, he was between your legs and you took a deep breath — you just had to tie two ribbons to both of his biceps. How easy is that, right? Wrong. It wasn't easy at all, especially the way he looked at you, so smitten like you were the only person in his world, knowing full well you weren’t but you sure took a large of his heart and mind.

“Doll, you just have to tie them, take a photo, and make it your new wallpaper,” he says like it's that simple, yes you're going to make the photo your new wallpaper, you can't help but do it. He smiled sweetly at you, a little playful even, and you took the two pink laces from his hands without hesitation. "I'll make the prettiest ribbons so you won't want to take them off."

"Your wish is my command," you first grabbed his left hand giving it a light squeeze before tying the lace into a cute ribbon. You met his eyes for just a moment and blushed slightly as you began tying a ribbon around his right bicep. "You have very gentle hands, you know that?"

Yes, of course, you do. ”Do I? Maybe I’m just extra careful because I don’t want to ruin this perfect canvas,” you replied, cheeks warming at his compliment, trying to focus on the ribbons and not how his muscles tensed beneath your touch.

Once you were done, he couldn't resist flexing his muscles again, and you could see the lase straining, almost ready to snap. “First, let me take a photo, then you can flex as much as you want,” you said, quickly grabbing your phone. You took a couple of photos, capturing the contrast of the delicate ribbons against his inked arms. But then you had another idea. “Yamato, hug me.”

He didn’t need to be told twice, wrapping his arms around you, the bows stood out even more. Only your face was visible, his was resting on your shoulder, but you smiled for the camera as you took a selfie. And just like that, you had your new wallpaper.

“You can let go now,” you teased, but Endo had no intention of letting go. Instead, he swept you off, lifting you in a bridal carry like you were some feather. “Wouldn't dream of it, sweets,” he murmured, eyes now telling you something else. “Now, how about I show you just how strong these really arms are?”

You were shocked by how easily he handled you, but you trusted him completely into letting him take the lead. His strength wasn't just physical—it was the way he could make you feel safe and excited all at once, just by telling you sweet nothings like it was his second nature. Your heart raced, cheeks getting ever redder as he carried you towards the bedroom, knowing full well that he was just getting started.

taglist :: @maruflix

©2024 kaiser1ns do not copy, repost or modify my work

[velocesainz]

Hii!

Could you possibly do a Percy Jackson smut with Percy fucking the brat out of reader, his rival? Rough sex with degrading and praise pls and ty 🫶🏼🫶🏼

A/n:This was quite an interesting request for me to write, thank you for the idea! All character have been aged up (19-20)

More than rivalry

Percy jackson masterlist | Main masterlist |

Summary: Percy gets jealous seeing you (his rival) with another boy and decides to fuck you to make sure you remember that you are his but you end up being too cocky for his liking

Warnings: smut, degradation

Pairing: Percy x daughter of Zeus! Reader

Reader pov:

I was practising my archery skills with some Apollo kids and we were actually having a lot of fun

Over the time I had spent Robert over the past few days perfecting my archery we both really grew close together

He was one of the very few people at camp who were actually friends with me for me and not because I was Zeus’s daughter.

While we were training I clumsily fell over a rock and was about to go crash into the ground but Robert caught me in time.

We stayed in the position for a little bit not knowing what to do.

We looked at each other with soft and gentle eyes, like how friends would rather than people who like each other though it seemed otherwise to most.

It was a sweet moment we both were trying to savour when a bellowing voice split us apart

“Oi thunder witch! What are you doing, let the poor guy out of his misery and do some practising on your own yea?” Yelled the voice that I really didn’t want to hear right now

Percy motherfucking Jackson

“Ocean ass how about you go bother someone else. He’s here with me at his own will for your kind information. Care more about your friends yea?” I retorted

I wanted to leave the arena as fast as possible so I bid Robert goodbye and left for my cabin

Percy pov:

Crisis averted.

I didn’t let Robert and y/n have their moment.

Why the fuck out of all the girls here does Robert have to go for y/n?

He has like a hundred girls dying for him.

Doesn’t he know she’s mine?

I know we seem like enemies but I wish to fuck like every second of the day at this point

She’s just so beautiful and that attitude damn.

I had a plan to get y/n away from every other guy, not just Robert.

Reader pov:

I was sitting in my cabin reading a book when I heard a knock on my door

That’s odd, I thought

Nobody was usually free at this hour in the evening

Everyone was too busy scheming for capture the flag except me of course

I wasn’t allowed to participate along with Percy since we were a tad bit overpowered

I walked over and opened the door and before I could figure out who it was they shoved me against the wall and started kissing me

I pushed the figure away and tried to run but they caught me

“Don’t try to run bitch. You need to be taught a lesson. Now be a good little slut and listen to what I say or the consequences will be severe for you” the figure whispered in my ear.

Then I realised who it was

Percy.

I was feeling cocky today so I decided to tease him a little

“You sure you can be intimidating and dominating seaweed brain? I don’t think you can even satisfy me forget punishing me”I replied with a smirk gracing my features

“Oh you asked for this whore. By the time I’m done with you you will be so dumb for my cock that you won’t even remember your name. Just you wait “ he said in a Husky voice which turned me on more than I would like to admit

He started removing my clothes as fast as he could and I couldn’t help but sneak in a cheeky comment

“Desperate are we?” Boy oh boy was this a bad decision

“I’m going to fuck that cocky attitude right out of you. You really just can’t keep your mouth shut can you whore?” Percy said and threw me in my bed

Undressing himself he got on the bed and made his way towards me like a predator approaching its prey

He moved my panties to the side and roughly shoved his cock inside me without any warning

“A-ah p-p-Percy that hurts sto-“ I was cut off by a slap I received

“Shut the fuck up slut. You were the one who was acting all cocky just a few minutes ago. Bitches like you don’t deserve to be cared for” Percy panted as he continued thrusting in and out

His pace was ungodly. He kept thrusting in and out of me letting my pussy drink up his cock

I felt like I was losing my mind as he hit my g-spot repeatedly completely abusing it

“O-oh fuck your pussy is tight. G-gods I’m going to come. Ah yea just like that” He whispered huskily

“I am going to cum too Percy” I told him

“No no. You don’t get to cum you little slut. You’ve been a really back whore for me. You don’t get to cum today, deal with it yourself” Percy said as he came in me

He got dressed quickly and left leaving me a panting and unsatisfied mess

Goddamit jackson.

A/n: let me know if you guys liked this fic or if you have any feedback! Requests are still on hold unfortunately but they’ll be opened soon. Kissies ✨

[luvhughes43]

sweetener | jack hughes

au masterlist⭐️ (apart of the journalist! au)

the previous part is linked here !

word count: 5.8k

⋆ ★

Three hurried knocks sound out from my front door and I rush out into the entry way as if whoever is behind that door will dissipate at a moment's notice. Of course I know that wouldn't happen, because Jack Hughes is standing on the other side of my door and all week he’s been updating me on his schedule and when he’d be able to meet our daughter. 

He’s been saying that a lot, our daughter. Which, he’s right. Leighton is our daughter but the word our feels so completely foreign to me that my mind reels and my heart races every time I hear him say it. Which is another thing, because Jack is a serial texter and yet, every night this past week without fail he’s called me to talk. He’s completely committed to being a father, and now that the paternity test came back telling us what we already know, Jack is coming to meet Leighton. Our daughter. 

Jack knocks again, and I quickly comb through my hair with my fingers before slowly opening the door. 

“Hey,” Jack waves awkwardly, unsure of what to do when you’re about to meet your secret baby for the first time. We both shuffle around my entryway awkwardly, before I gesture for Jack to sit on my couch. 

“Do you want water or anything to drink?” I ask lamely, twisting a lone baby blanket that was sprawled across the back of the couch in my hands. Jack shakes his head and then rubs his sweaty palms on his jeans. 

What were you supposed to say to someone who was meeting their baby for the first time? Somebody that you had so much history with? Somebody who, despite everything that happened, still has a prominent place in your heart? You wouldn’t know. 

Jack opens his mouth, before quickly shutting it again. 

“I’ll go get Leighton,” I nod dumbly, as if that wasn’t the whole reason that we were both here. I’m not normally this awkward around Jack but… under the circumstances any sort of social queues I know have gone right out of the window. I don't let Jack reply before I shuffle out of the room. 

Leighton is dressed in a pink one piece onesie which was a gift from Jack’s mother, Ellen. Who for the last week has been texting me and sending things over to the apartment. 

As soon as Jack hears my footsteps, he's rushing to his feet and facing us. “Oh wow…” he murmurs as soon as he lays eyes on our daughter. “This is so much better than the pictures and videos…” he trails off again, referring to the numerous videos I've sent him of our daughter this past week. 

“Do you want to hold her?” I ask, to which Jack immediately nods. I gesture for him to sit back down on the couch and he happily obliges. 

“She’s gorgeous,” Jack awes as I shift Leighton to rest into his arms. I’m not surprised that I don’t have to tell Jack how to hold a baby properly, he’s always been so well versed with children. Even when we were dating babies and kids just seemed to gravitate towards him, making it easy for him to handle kids.

Tears rush to Jack’s waterline as he holds his daughter for the first time. He doesn’t bother to wipe them away as they freely run down his cheeks. “I have a baby,” he whispers, gaze soft as he stares at our little girl. “Hi Leighton,” he says again, voice slightly louder as he tries to get the young girl's attention. She smiles up at him gummily, before reaching a chubby hand out and latching onto one of her dad’s fingers. 

I silently pull my phone out of my pocket and capture the sweet moment between the two. I had imagined this moment for months, but no dream would ever compare to what was sitting before me. Jack softly cooing at our daughter, completely in awe of her would be something that I would never forget. 

⋆ ★

When Jack looks back on the past year, he can’t help but wince. If he was more mature maybe he wouldn’t have let you walk away so easily - maybe he would have seen through Vivienne's deceptions and would have realized that he wasn’t truly happy with her. After meeting his daughter and getting to spend time with you in person today he made a promise to himself that he would do better for himself and for his family. 

His family. Whom he had just fully met a few hours ago and yet his happiness still hadn’t slowed or ebbed away yet. It was all so incredibly surreal.

“Like I'm telling you, that was the most.. Like the best thing that’s ever happened to me,” Jack spoke hurriedly on the phone to his older brother Quinn. “I have a daughter, and she’s real, and I held her today,”

“That’s really great,” 

“She grabbed a hold of my finger! She has a really good grip, probably going to be better than all of us at hockey,” Quinn only laughed in response. 

“When can I meet her?” he asked. 

“I don’t know, I'll have to talk to y/n about everything. We’re taking it slow right now you know? Just trying to get me comfortable with the baby and all that,” Jack answers, excitement still laced in his voice. “Mom sent Leighton some things though which… Leighton… What a pretty name? Like I have a daughter”

“I’m really happy everything's starting to work out for you,” Quinn responded. After all the dramatics of the past few weeks, the future was finally starting to brighten.

“Thank you,” Jack replied honestly, mind still reeling from the day's events. “I have a family.” 

⋆ ★

ynuser

liked by jackhughes, claudia, and others

ynuser my whole world🤍

jackhughes added to their story !

⋆ ★

“Are you okay? Why are you smiling so hard?” my best friend said to me as I finished doing my makeup. 

“What? I’m fine!”

“No seriously, what’s going on?” Claudia continues, easily seeing past my poorly constructed lies. 

“Jack’s coming over to see Leighton tonight,” I can’t help the smile on my face as it grows. Jack’s coming over. How long have I waited to say that? Now that this whole mess is behind us, we’ve really started to carve out a routine for ourselves. Jack would make the trip to NYC as much as he could within his schedule, and he’d come over and spend time with Leighton and I. Everything is finally starting to fall into place, and so sue me for getting a little excited that he had the whole evening free to spend time with Leighton and I. 

Claudia rolled her eyes, “You’re moving fast,”

At her words, my forehead scrunches. I don’t like the way she said it, moving fast, it sounds like she disapproves of Jack and I starting to co-parent.

“Well, we already have a kid together so I think it’s a little too late for ‘moving fast’” I remark, busying myself in my makeup bag so she doesn’t see the clear displeasure coating my features. 

Claudia studies me for a minute and I wish she wouldn't. I understand that Jack’s and I’s situation is completely out of the ordinary and that we were childish and immature before. But honestly, how else are we supposed to go about this situation if not barrel straight ahead? We waited for him to meet Leighton until the paternity was settled, we created a clear schedule for his visits and we’ve spent hours discussing how we would go about co-parenting. 

“Nothing I guess,” she shrugs simply. I reach for my powdered blush and messily reapply.

It’s tense for the next five minutes it takes for me to finish my makeup.

 “Well, how “fast” should we be going? Because, I know I'm trying the best that I can here. We have a history, and we have a baby, so i’m sorry if you think things seem to be going “too fast” for you,” 

“You're right, I'm sorry” Claudia immediately apologizes, probably not realizing how her words had offended me earlier.

Ever since Jack started making a reappearance in my life Claudia’s had an attitude about it… always wanting to sprinkle little comments here and there. I get that she’s overprotective, but she takes it too far with Jack. It wasn’t his fault that he wasn’t here for my pregnancy and the first few months of Leighton’s life. 

“I’m sorry,” I sigh. “Things have been… nice recently and I just need this to work out.” 

Claudia nods in understanding, and it makes me want to take my apology back.

When Jack comes over two hours later, any sense of annoyance or stress I was feeling immediately dissipates. We do our usual, watch over Leighton and play with her. She’s only a few months old and so there’s not much that she can do yet besides smile and play peek-a-boo, which I'm learning Jack excels at. 

“And… peek-a-boo!” the hockey player enthuses for what seemed like the hundredth time that evening to an excited baby. Leighton face scrunches up as she lets out another round of loud laughs, which immediately causes Jack and I to giggle.

“We have the cutest kid!”

“We really do,” Jack replies, eyes trained on our daughter who's smiling up at him. I leave the two to play as I make my way into my kitchen. It’s already getting quite late and since Jack’s keeping Leighton entertained… I might as well make dinner before he has to leave and I have to watch over her again. She always gets fussy closer to her bedtime, making it essentially impossible to cook dinner before she’s asleep. 

I pull out all of my necessary ingredients before pausing. “Jack?”

“What?” he calls out. 

“Are you staying for dinner? I’m making pasta” I respond, walking back into the living room so we don't have to yell. 

“Ohh can I? I’ve missed your cooking so much,” 

He missed my cooking… it was such a simple task and yet my heart melted… There was so much we seemed to be missing of each other these days.

Dinner coincidentally ends up being ready just as soon as Jack finishes putting Leighton to bed.

“It’s crazy to think that we’re parents,” Jack voices his thoughts aloud in between bites of his dinner. “Like, really. Were mother and father… like that's insane,”

“Are you having doubts?” I joke, knowing that he’s fully committed to being a father. His amazon cart alone proves that with all the toys and outfits he has ordered for our daughter. 

“No never! Are you kidding me? Being with you two… it feels right,” 

I giggle and end up having to cover my mouth with my hands. 

“What?”  

“I’m sorry that was just really cute,” I explain myself, lowering my hands so that Jack could see my wide smile which he immediately reciprocates with his usual gorgeous smile. 

Jack leans his head on the palm of his hand, and things finally feel like they used to. If I wanted to I could reach my hand out and hold his, but just knowing that he was here was enough. For so many months I wished that what I was seeing now would become true and now everything had finally turned out. 

“I’m really happy y/n”

“I’m really happy too,” my face tingles, but unlike my smile I make no move to cover the redness that was no doubt coating my cheeks. 

⋆ ★

Now that I am back from maternity leave, it seems like my boss is trying to punish me. I’m constantly getting all of the shitty news stories, and I've been getting less opportunities to get out on the field. Therefore, I've been stuck in the office all day writing fluff pieces about influencers and brands that “you need in your life!”. 

So, when I got the call that there was an important story that I could work on but it would mean I had to come into the office on my day off… well… I was going into the office. 

Now usually I had somebody to watch Leighton on the days that I work, but there was just no way that I would be able to find somebody to watch her on such a short notice. So, I did the only thing that I could think of and asked Jack if he was willing to watch Leighton by himself… for the first time. 

The day started out simply enough. Jack had come over to y/n's apartment early with breakfast and some coffee for the both of them. He listened dutifully to y/n explaining Leightons morning routine, and he prepared the baby a fresh bottle with no stress. Even after y/n had left for work, Jack had been running the place smoothly and without any hiccups. Which is why around mid-afternoon when Leighton refused her bottle that Jack had panicked.

“Okay, please just eat. I know you're hungry,” he cooed to the small girl who was cradled tightly against his chest. She squirmed, tears running down her face at a rapid speed. 

He had rocked Leighton, burped her, walked around the apartment with her bundled in his arms all in hopes of her quieting down. When nothing worked he had checked her diaper, changed it although it was clean, and warmed up her bottle again in case that may have been the issue. She continued on wailing.

“Please Leighton, eat for daddy please. Settle down, it's okay!” He tried his hardest but nothing was working. He debated on calling his parents but ultimately thought it was pathetic that he didn’t know how to take care of his own child. He had missed out on so many months with his girl, what if he fucked today up and was never allowed to take care of her again? Jack started to spiral. 

Another painstakingly long hour went by, and Jack felt as if he had truly lost his mind. Nothing was helping Leighton settle down, and now Jack was so far behind y/ns schedule that he was feeling beyond hopeless. 

“Just- okay just eat!” Jack tried again, but every time Leighton got close to the bottle she would shift her head away and cry. “I don't know how to help you!” he rocked his daughter in his arms. “Please, help me help you,” 

It was to no surprise that Leighton kept crying. So Jack did the only thing that he could think of doing next, he walked swiftly to Leightons crib and left her there. Once she was confined in her crib, he simply walked out of her room and back into the living room where he fished his headphones out of his bag. 

Jack's shoulders sagged in relief when the first few chords of some country song played. 

I’m not a good dad

I don’t know what to do

How am I supposed to be a father?

After two more songs played in their entirety, Jack called his mom. 

“Are you okay…?” I ask as soon as I catch sight of Jack whose shoulders were sagging. 

“Listen, everyone has already asked me that tonight so I don't need to hear it again. you don’t need to lecture me”

“Excuse me? I don’t even know what’s wrong?” “It was my first time watching my daughter, and I fucked up, I know”

“Jack… I'm not mad at you?” 

“Right, whatever” he says, gathering all his belongings that were scattered throughout my apartment and stuffing them in his bag. 

I stare at him in confusion, “Can we talk about this?”

Jack continues stuffing shit in his bag, and I walk towards him and place a firm hand on his shoulder. He shrugs it off, twisting towards me. “I don't want to talk about it,” 

I scoff, patience truly wiening thin. “Well, I’m Leighton’s mother and I would like to talk about what happened”

“I can’t do this with you tonight” Jack sighs, running a hand through his messy hair. 

“Do what? Communicate?”

“Look, i’ve had a rough week at work and i’ve been a shit dad tonight so I really don’t need to hear you bitch at me right now”

“What the fuck is wrong with you? Don’t talk to me like that.” 

“Like what!” Jack says defensively. 

“Saying I'm going to bitch at you! I want us to talk through things. You getting upset over a few minor mistakes isn’t going to get us anywhere. Leighton is fine, you’re fine, so tell me what’s really going on so that we can get past this”

Jack scoffs, “there's nothing going on”

“Well, you’re being all rude and defensive so there must be something” I snark, truly fed up with Jack’s behaviour. I understand that today was a lot for him, and maybe it wasn’t the best idea for him to watch Leighton for a full day when he’s only used to a few hours but he can at least try and speak nicely to me. 

“You know what? I don’t need this right now” Jack says, breaking his stance and making quick steps towards the door. 

I’m hot on his heels and he yanks the door open. “Jack?”

He slams the door, and i’m left reeling with whatever the fuck just happened. 

⋆ ★

3 weeks later...

DEUXMOI

liked by vivienne, and others

deuxmoi Jack Hughes seems to be a topic of demand recently…. But don’t worry! Viviennes new podcast episode will cover everything you need to know and more! Stay tuned

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user19 vivienne sending her own “tip” into deuxmoi just so she can get views on her new podcast episode… deuxmoi hits a new low every day

user20 this is actually so embarrassing omg

user21 nhl players on deuxmoi is my worst nightmare tbh

user22 theyve been on here for awhile lol its nothing new

user23 ohhhh i’ll be tuned in!

user23 he definitely cheated on her omgggg😭😭

⋆ ★

Pretty Girls Podcast EP 22: Mr. NHL Man

[audio] timestamp: 24:33 - 1:13:03

Co-host: Okay maybe we should address the elephant in the room!

Vivienne: The elephant in the room? I’m crying… [laughs], but yes everybody is here to know about my ex-boyfriend situation so let's just get into it

Co-host: Right so… 

Vivienne: Okay so Jack Hughes!

[both laugh]

Co-host: Oh we're just coming right out and saying it!

Vivienne: I mean everybody knows

Co-host: Right, so let's get into it. What's the story? Because you’ve only told me parts of the story but I don't-

Vivienne: I haven't really gone into detail with anybody yet so this is like, an exclusive

Vivienne: But anyway… as we all know… Jack and I were seeing each other for a while and we were pretty official by the time I did the podcast with Alix Earle. So there was this whole bit of Alix calling her boyfriend “mr. nfl man” and so I teased Jack by calling him Mr. NHL man.

Co-host: Right as one does! And I just want to add, Vivienne and Jack were - you guys were kind of serious at this point. Like your relationship wasn’t just a fling like there’s a reason you're talking about it on the pod. 

Vivienne: Yeah we were fully dating by that point. Like he was staying over at my apartment and things like that. 

Co-host: How did you guys get together? You should tell the whole story, like I'm already sensing the hate comments you’ll get if you don’t tell this right.

Vivienne: Okay. So, I met Jack through a mutual friend of ours and that's how we started talking. We went on a few dates to bars and things, and we really got along well, or at least I thought we did. 

Co-host: Were there any warning signs?

Vivienne: Honestly… 

Vivienne: Things were really good between us and we had a “normal” relationship for the first few months. Like we got together around the beginning of the hockey season, and we broke up like, right before he went on personal leave if you guys keep up with the NHL side of things.

Vivienne: But basically we were doing completely fine and it wasn’t until people started catching on that Jack and I were dating that things became rocky. 

Co-host: I've also seen a lot of things about an ex that he had? Like I'm just going to come out and say it, did he cheat on you?

Vivienne: Honestly, till this day I don't really know. 

Co-host: What? What do you mean?

Vivienne: He didn't tell me why we broke up. Like, I'm being so serious. One day he came over to my apartment and just broke up with me and then unfollowed me on everything. 

Co-host: Oh my god??

Vivienne: Honestly, I think it's because of his ex. Like, the amount of times I caught him searching through his photo albums of her is insane.

Co-host: What an asshole oh my god?? Do you know if they got back together or if they were talking while you two were still together?

Vivienne: No they weren’t talking

Co-host: How do you know?

Vivienne: I uh… 

Co-host: Did you go through his texts or something?

Vivienne: Well… [short pause].. No I didn’t- well- I know he wasn’t

Co-host: Okay…

Vivienne: But it was clear there was something going on there [weak laugh]

Co-host: Damn…

Vivienne: But anyway, he broke up with me unexpectedly and I just don't know why

Co-host: To be honest it sounds like he cheated on you and just didn't want to own up to it.

Vivienne: Yeah… I mean possibly. The ex thing was..

Co-host: He was just using you as a distraction and that really sucks for you.

Vivienne: It's just an awful situation. Like it was clear that he was still hung up on his ex and now I look like an idiot in front of everyone for making our relationship public.

Co-host: I don't think you look like an idiot. You thought the relationship was going to work out and now people are flooding your comment section begging to know what happened. Plus, it's Jack's fault anyway. Like he's no stranger to cheating allegations so what are you supposed to do?

Vivienne: Yeah… my dms are full of his fans basically blaming me for the breakup when they don't even know what happened. 

Vivienne: So, I just want it to be clear that I did nothing. Like I didn't want us to break up. 

Co-host: Even though you knew about the ex?

Vivienne: Yeah… I just felt so… like our relationship was really good I think I would have put up with anything. But now that it’s over i'm stuck looking back and… well it’s clear he maybe wasn’t always faithful or he had commitments with his ex. 

Co-host: Gosh…

Vivienne: But that's honestly it. After this episode is over I'm not talking about this. It's honestly really hurtful…

[end of snippet]

⋆ ★

“y/n i’m so sorry,” Jack's words are fast as he paces the floor of my entryway. He had a game in a few hours which he would no doubt be late for, seeing as he’s all the way in New York City instead of Newark.

“What are you doing here? You have a game?” I wonder aloud, Leighton softly cooing from her spot on my chest. 

Jack pauses at the sound of his daughter and his eyes visibly soften. “I’m really sorry,”

“I wasn’t mad at you,”

“I’m just afraid to mess things up again,”

“Jack…”

“And I'm sorry for snapping at you. It wasn’t your fault that I got upset,” 

I walk towards Jack and place a comforting hand on his arm, mindful of our daughter that was strapped to my front.

“I should have stayed,” he says into my hair, his arm coming around to hold onto me. 

I turn my body to hold him properly, and Leighton babbles away as she’s wedged between her parents. “You were overwhelmed. You're not used to watching her all the time and that’s okay,”

“I should be okay watching her while you’re at work I just-”

“You have to be kind to yourself,” I start, slowly pulling yourself away from Jack to lead the two of us into the living room. “It took me a long time to learn Leightons needs and how to read her. With more time you’ll learn and become more comfortable,”

Jack nods reluctantly, ultimately realizing that what I was saying was the truth. We sit in silence for a while, both wanting nothing more than to move on from this situation. 

“Come to my game tonight?” Jack breaks the silence. “You and Leighton? Please?” 

“You want us to come… tonight?” I question. Was this a good idea? 

Jack nods and takes Leighton out of my hands. “I think she should come to her first game,” 

“Okay….” I’m slow to agree. When Jack and I were dating, I barely went to his games. He never really invited me, and I had always felt weird about asking. With our relationship so private, we usually just appreciated each other’s careers from afar. 

Jack looks away from our daughter and back up at me, “I've talked to management about our… situation and they’re okay with you sitting in the box with Nico since he’s out” Jack explains. “It’ll be completely safe, and if you're worried about the drive to the stadium I’ve got my car and I can drive you” 

“What about afterwards?” 

“I can drive you back here after the game or you can stay at my place… I've… i've bought a bassinet for Leighton and some things if you guys want to stay the night,” 

“Okay,” I agree easily now. “Let me pack some of our stuff and we’ll stay with you tonight,”Jack looks beyond relieved at my words.

njdevils

Liked by jackhughes, _quinnhughes, trevorzegras, and others

njdevils Jack is back and meeting some fans 🔥

tagged: jackhughes

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jackhughes ❤️

_quinnhughes Love to see it

user24 jack and quinns comments… okay….

user25 jack is such a girl dad ugh! so cute!

user26 jack would be such a good dad im crying

user27 hold on is that his ex gf?? she looks like the same girl from the fan pics

user28 omfg wait???

⋆ ★

nhl.drama

liked by hughesl0ver43, and 351 others

nhl.drama jack hughes ex gf, vivienne aiden, reveals in her podcast that jack seemingly broke up with her for no reason. she also claims that he would constantly look at pictures of his ex gf while they were together, and he may have possibly cheated. what are your thoughts?💭

-

#jackhughes #nhl #vivienneaiden #confession #nhldrama

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user29 this is honestly just ridiculous like she clearly made this all up

user30 ? what how do u know

user29 she kept rambling on, couldn't confirm if Jack cheated or not, and just started bringing up his ex gf? And also, if she really didn’t know why he broke up with her/would still go back to him.. why would she make a whole podcast about it? it fr doesn't make sense

user31 They said Jack has a history of cheating? How would they even know that i’m so confused

user32 viv was his ex lmao im sure somebody warned her about him.

user33 i think it’s so weird that some of u guys are sticking up for jack… like vivienne sounded so sad / upset during the podcast… like he obviously did something wrong regardless of if shes telling the truth or not.

user34 she did not sound upset at all… she was legit laughing throughout the whole podcast and she could not make up her mind on which “story” she was gonna tell. she clearly lied and i hope jack sues her ass🤷‍♀️

user35 the timeline of this whole thing is so interesting tbh. like what ex are they talking about? also, i wish viv confirmed why jack took a personal leave lol. she left out all the interesting bits

user36 “ex gf” …. do yall think it was the girl from last year ? istg they refollowed each other after vivienne and jack broke up

user37 this whole drama is so lame IMO. just another girl looking for her 5 seconds of fame… nobody should care if jack cheated or not because his job is to play HOCKEY. honestly who gaf about his personal life

user38 his personal life is bleeding into his game lol. 

user39 LEAVE HIM ALONE MY GOD!!!!! U KNOW NOTHING. 

⋆ ★

Vivienne's podcast episode about her breakup with Jack had gone viral overnight. Everybody online was speculating about their relationship, as well as trying to prove each side right. Some of Jack's fans were trying hard to prove that Vivienne was lying and well, gossipers around the world were sticking up for Vivienne and trying to confirm that Jack is a serial cheater. 

Thankfully for Vivienne, she just had to sit back and enjoy the show. She knew that there was absolutely no way that Jack would come out and deny the cheating rumours, plus she knew y/n was private on everything and wouldn't come forward either. The drama would run its course for a few days until something better came along, and then Vivienne would be completely off the hook for everything. 

Alix E: just watched the pod! i hope you’re doing well❤️

Tana M: HE CHEATED ON YOU?? that's actually crazy. youre so fucking pretty. ugh, men are awful. If you ever wanna come on the cancelled podcast you're always welcome!

Alex C: Men are the worsttttt. Youre absolutely winning life though so make him regret it!💋

Everything seemed to be falling right into the palm of Viviennes hands. While Jack finding out about the whole y/n thing was a colossal nightmare, the support from her peers almost made up for it. She now had deals lining up the block, and she knew her career would only sky rocket from here on out. 

While being with Jack had pulled in massive numbers, the breakup was just insane for her social blade. She had gained soo many more followers across all platforms after posting Jack on her story, plus naming him in her podcast was just… it was honestly too good. A pr dream… It was going to be Viviennes year. 

⋆ ★

As soon as the small family made it back to Jack’s apartment after the game, they were all exhausted. Leighton had fallen asleep well into the second period, and had surprisingly stayed asleep despite how loud the arena was.

Jack quietly guided his girls into his bedroom. He set Leighton in her bassinet, and then helped me organize some of the things I brought over.  

“I haven’t been here in so long,” I mumbled as I pulled my toiletries out of her bag. 

“Well you're always welcome,” Jack whispered back as he silently watched me fumble around in the darkness.

“Shit, I forgot pyjama pants and all I have are jeans…” 

Jack immediately stands from his position in bed, mindful of the fact that Leighton is peacefully sleeping in the recently purchased bassinet. “You can have a pair of my sweats if you want?” he whispers as he walks over to his dresser and pulls out options. 

“It’s okay,”

“I’m not letting you sleep in jeans that's foul,” Jack says quietly as he gives me a pair of his sweats.

“Thank you,” my face heats up. If I wasn’t thinking about our history before, now I am. Everything was becoming a little too much… if I closed her eyes I could still picture the way things used to be. How we’d stay in his apartment and well… yeah.

Jack turned away just then, settling himself in his bed so that I could finish getting ready. He hadn’t thought too far ahead in their sleeping arrangements, and just as he started to worry that y/n might’ve found her way to the couch he felt a dip in his mattress. 

“Do you mind if…?”

“No I uh- No I don’t” Jack stuttered, completely caught off guard by their newfound closeness. 

“Thanks for tonight,” I whispered, snuggling into all of Jack’s blankets and excess pillows, all of which were bought when we were still together. 

“No worries,”

“I mean it though. Thanks for talking to me in person earlier and for driving us to the game” I continued sleepily. “And for letting us stay here tonight,” 

“Of course. Anything for my girls,” 

When there was no answer, Jack looked over to y/n's side of the bed only to find that she was already fast asleep. He checked the bassinet afterwards to find his daughter sleeping peacefully as well. Jack sighed in contentment before drifting off to sleep himself. 

My girls,

My girls, 

My girls..

Life was sweet.

next part

-

-

-

[xanasaurusrex]

comforting clarisse after breaking her spear

clarisse la rue x reader (any godly parent) a/n: i promise this was supposed to be a drabble but i got carried away (:

clarisse was stomping through the camp after capture the flag. everyone was practically jumping out of her way, no one wanting to face her very clear wrath.

by now, everyone knew what had happened right before the blue team won capture the flag. percy, the new kid, and clarisse had been in a pretty heated fight. the ares kids that usually followed clarisse around had backed off, realizing that the fight was a little bit more heated than they anticipated.

percy and clarisse both had a hold on the spear, and when clarisse threw him over her shoulder, the spear had snapped in two.

nobody had seen clarisse this angry in a really long time.

clarisse knew that she hadn't been this angry in a long time. honestly, she couldn't remember the last time she had wanted to rip the world apart half as much as she did right now.

clarisse had spent enough time being forced into therapy by her mother to know that being this angry wasn't good. she was determined, even in her rage-induced haze, to not approach percy jackson right now, because she would only make things worse. yes, she hated the kid more than anything right now, and yes, if the opportunity arose, she would twist his arms right off his body, but again, that would only make things worse.

there was only one person right now who clarisse knew could calm her down enough so that she wouldn't go on a killing spree.

y/n.

clarisse didn't know exactly where she was, but she had a pretty good idea. if y/n wasn't there already, she would be soon.

clarisse completely bypassed all of the cabins and headed straight for the woods. a few people looked at her in curiosity, but a quick sneer from clarisse got them to mind their own business.

the second clarisse had passed the initial wall of trees into the woods, she took a second to take a deep breath of the pine-scented air. just taking a break from practically stomping through the camp, she felt a lot of the tension in her body relaxed. she was here, she was away from the prying eyes and nosiness of the other campers, and most importantly, she was away from percy jackson.

that was a big step in the right direction.

she looked up and to her right, and caught sight of the first tree. it had a circle carved into it. she walked past it, and a few feet later saw another tree with a circle carved into it.

she followed the trail of circle-carved trees into a clearing that she'd found during her first summer here at camp.

originally, clarisse never planned on sharing this area with anyone. it was only hers. it was her safe place from the world, from all the stresses and anxieties that plagued her day and night, an escape from camp.

the clearing was mostly used as her calm down spot, where she came when she was so angry all she could see was red.

like right now.

but then she met y/n, and at the end of their first summer together, clarisse took her here, and showed it to her. and so now, whenever they needed to, they met up here. to just... be for a few hours.

together.

when clarisse finally pushed past the tall grass that was closing off the clearing, and she stepped foot on the grass that clarisse cut every once in a while, she finally caught sight of y/n.

just seeing her made everything feel as if it was going to be okay.

clarisse felt her muscles relax completely, and all the angry thoughts were quieted as thoughts of her girlfriend climbed into her mind, took root there, and made themselves comfortable.

clarisse was okay with that, because thinking about y/n was much more pleasant than thinking about that punk percy jackson.

clarisse stood there for a few more seconds, admiring y/n. the way the sun shone on her hair. the rings that glittered on her finger, every single one of them gifted to her by clarisse. seeing y/n wear them always made her happy, made her feel like she could climb a mountain and barely break a sweat.

she was sure that she had never loved anyone as much as she loved y/n.

it was at that moment that y/n turned around. at first, there was a slight look of alarm on her face, but it calmed as soon as she realized it was clarisse.

"clarisse," y/n murmured, and just that one utterance of her name felt like a siren's song for clarisse, immediately drawing her to her.

y/n was sitting on one of the large boulders in the clearing, a thin blanket already spread out over the surface of it so she could safely sit on the rock without burning her legs.

y/n stood up, and walked towards clarisse. clarisse took a step closer to her, and then they were right in front of each other, faces just a few inches apart.

"hi," clarisse muttered.

"hi," y/n smiled.

the two looked at each other for a few more seconds, before y/n opened her arms, and clarisse immediately fell into them. clarisse's face buried itself in y/n's neck, and y/n didn't hesitate to start stroking clarisse's hair in the way that she knew she loved. the way her mother had always done when she would get overwhelmed as a kid.

clarisse let out a heavy breath, one that y/n suspected she had been holding for quite some time.

"do you wanna talk about it?" y/n asked quietly.

clarisse shook her head harshly, and then hugged her arms tighter around y/n's waist. "not yet."

"okay." y/n responded.

the two stood there hugging for a few minutes, clarisse's tight hold on y/n never wavering. clarisse's breathing was labored and heavy, and y/n knew it was because she was holding back tears.

clarisse was the kind of person who didn't like to cry. even though y/n knew that there were probably tears glistening in her eyes, clarisse was going to refuse to let them fall, because clarisse was determined to be as tough as possible.

y/n couldn't even begin to imagine the pain clarisse was feeling right now. her spear, the one gift clarisse had from her father, was now snapped in half and unusable. that spear had been clarisse's prized possession, the thing she regarded with utmost love and care, and never allowed anybody but her touch.

there had been one time that clarisse had allowed y/n to hold it for a few minutes, but even then clarisse was anxious at the idea of not being in complete control of it, even for a small amount of time.

y/n had heard clarisse's scream as her and the rest of red team chased after luke with the flag. she had been so close, ever so close, and had run even faster when she heard the scream clarisse let out.

when she stumbled onto the beach and saw the snapped spear, she immediately knew what happened.

y/n didn't stay to find out what happened after that, she just saw the way clarisse stomped off in anger, and she immediately rushed away to get to the clearing, knowing that clarisse would need to be calmed down.

and now the two of you were here, standing in the middle of your clearing, holding each other.

finally, after a long time of just standing there in an embrace, clarisse whispers, "that was the only thing i ever got from my dad,"

y/n pulled away to look at clarisse, and felt the small patch of wetness that clarisse had left behind on her shoulder. "i know, honey," she whispered. she took hold of clarisse's hand and pulled her towards the boulder that she had been sitting on previously.

once the two were sitting, y/n directed clarisse to lay her head in her lap. she began stroking her hair again, and occasionally stroking her cheek.

"i'm so sorry this happened," y/n whispered in clarisse's ear. "i love you,"

"i love you too," clarisse whispered back.

clarisse closed her eyes, wanting to block out the visuals of the world, and focus only on the way y/n's hand felt when it was stroking her hair and her cheek, and the comfort she felt whenever she was in y/n's presence.

she loved this. she loved that she had a person who she knew she was safe with, safe to tell anything to.

clarisse was sure that she had never loved anyone as much as she loved y/n.

[ma1dita]

BABEEE happy birthday!! (i'm so terribly late i'm so sorry) congrats on 23💖

🐥 so i'm having thoughts right now about luke x reader and physical affection. like maybe one of them being touch starved and always craving the other person's touch and the other person noticing it and doing it more? maybe from platonic (i will go down with best friends to lovers) to romantic, i'm just on this brainrot tonight

🐥🐥🐥🐥🐥

luke castellan x reader

a/n: back from the klerb but here with a classic 4am post 🥂 but the hangxiety wont let me rest until this is out! ill edit this in the morning... or not 😗

wc: 1.1k

—

It’s hard to miss what you’ve never had.

Luke Castellan was never a touchy guy. Sure, he’ll hold a new camper’s hand during welcome tours (especially the little ones who can barely keep up with his long legs; if they’re lucky they get a piggy back ride), and he won’t shy away from a clap on the back when his strategies for capture the flag bring his team to victory (they always do, mind you), and when he feels like it, he’ll even shove Annabeth playfully to show her he adores her (but she packs a punch now that she’s older).

It never really goes past that, and he’s never had to think too hard about it—physical touch.

He’s the one who takes care of others—a part of his nature like it is for Hermes’ cabin to take in unclaimed demigods. But something changed in the months that he’s gotten closer to you. At first, he’d bite his tongue at the way you’re so open to patting his cheek when he does something funny (which he doesn’t try to make a show of, but now…), how you choose to sit so close to him during bonfires that your knees touch (the Apollo kids could be singing about the heavens falling down on them for all he cares but he zeroes in on every word that leaves your lips), and the way you’d lock your fingers with him for a pinky promise after every little thing ‘to make sure it’s real’ (Luke didn’t understand the merit of a pinky promise over whether you could have his dessert for the next week if you took over arts and crafts with the kiddie campers for him; truthfully he’d give it to you anyway). It was unusual for him to have someone comfort him, to show care without a true reason. But he didn’t realize how much more it bothered him now that you wouldn’t even look him in the eye.

Silena and some of the other Aphrodite children had asked you the very defining question of, “Do you like Luke Castellan?” and having never thought of it that way, or being able to put your feelings for him in words instead of fingers in his belt loops or in the muss of his curls—that shit was terrifying!

You spent all Saturday afternoon at the docks with them belly down under the glare of the sun’s rays as they explained to you what the five love languages are. By the end of it, sunburn wasn’t the only reason you felt hot.

“Your love language is physical touch,” one of Silena’s older half-siblings—Connelly, says like he’s explaining that the sky is blue, “And Luke’s not that type of guy! Think he’s more acts of service…”

“Ooh, or words of affirmation….” another one of them muses, but the sound of your heartbeat tunes it all out. Well shit, have you been sending him the wrong signals? Or are there even any signals you want to send him? 

Nevertheless, in the matters of love or even the tiniest whisper of it—maybe there’s no one else you can trust with this stuff besides Cabin 10.

Wrong.

Absolutely wrong. Whatever the hell you’ve been convinced or whatever’s changed since last weekend—Luke just knows he hates it, and he’s angry. He’s angry at how you gasp in surprise every time you brush shoulders during archery practice when you used to let him fix your form, he’s angry at how you’ll squeeze campers’ shoulders to tell them they’re doing a good job carrying the strawberry crates—and all he gets is a mumbled ‘Thanks, Castellan’ when he stacks them up and takes your load.

Luke’s so terribly angry that Travis told him he’s been walking around like a big strawberry, face red and irritated—but not at you. 

He realizes he’s also angry at the fact that he can’t protect you from the onslaught of a rain cloud—or maybe it was the fact that you’re so okay with the rain touching your skin and seeping through your orange shirt like he wishes you’d let him. He’s angry at the way the wind blows your hair into your face and your fingers brush the strands away like he wishes he can. Most of all, Luke Castellan is angry that he didn’t know how good a simple touch could be until he lost it—before he even really got to appreciate yours.

You’re sitting on the opposite end of the row in the amphitheater laughing with your friends and the furrow in his thick brow is a tell-tale sign of his discomfort. Luke doesn’t dare to remember what it’s like before you to be honest—he’d rather give up Elysium instead of having you ignore him like this. He calls your name, a tinge of both anger and desperation until you look over at him, eyelashes kissing your cheeks. The hold you have on him transcends the physical touch of your fingers but he wants, no—needs you next to him.

“C’mere! Why are you so far away?”

Luke hopes it doesn’t sound pathetic, but a crooked grin splits across his face as soon as you make your way over, sitting down and crossing your legs away from him. It’s still too far, even if he can feel your breath on his shoulder.

“Did I do something to make you angry? I…” The words escape his mouth in a jumble—quick wit from his father escaping him, though he knows not to rely on that asshole, god or not. You mutter words that almost escape him too, and he leans in, chasing your hands and putting them in his own until they’re gentle and soft in his lap.

“No, no…. I just… don’t want to push your boundaries. I know you don’t like it when I’m too touchy,” and he thinks his heart clenches a little like how you’re squeezing his hands. Luke shouldn’t feel instant gratification from a subconscious action. He wants to know you mean it with him—that’s what he can’t put into words.

“I….like it when you do.”

You notice the way his fingers tangle tighter with yours, pinkys interlocking with yours. When he lets go, Luke wraps his arm around your shoulders until you’re able to laugh in the crook of his neck. He chooses to place a kiss on the corner of your mouth when your head sways to face him at the silly tune about centaurs and then you realize that Luke loves the way you love him. You wonder if he accidentally missed meeting your lips, but then the noise in your head quiets down when he pulls you closer, lips locking tenderly, intentionally—as they were always meant to.

You both hear a giggle that sounds a lot like tinkling bells belonging to children of Aphrodite. 

For once they were wrong about love. 

Luke’s tongue parts through your lips and meets your own like they’re in a long awaited embrace, dancing and devouring you from the inside out but this, you— are what he can rely on. This, your touch, and how he chooses to let it consume him, never letting go.

[number1jeonginstan]

BABE BABE BABE!! MEANEST DOM DILF! JEONGIN MAKING READER SQUIRT MANY TIMES AND BEING MEAN TO HER, BUT TURNING INTO MUSH TOWARDS THE END!!!

A/N: HI HI HI!! I'm so sorry that this is like MONTHS late, but I wrote you a quick little drabble. When I tell you this is straight PORN it's literally straight porn.

pairing: I.N x afab!Reader

warnings: daddy kink (mb guys...), degradation, one slap, squirting, slight sub!space...

wc: .7k (got bored lol)

mdni!! 18+

“Are you fucking kidding me? Already tired from just cumming on my fingers twice?” he chuckled as your tongue lolled out to the side. Your eyes rolled to the back of your head as he kissed the side of your neck. 

He moved down to your breasts sucking on your hardened nipple as he brought his hand up to give the other one attention, pinching and gripping it. 

“Too much Innie” you whimpered as he continued to abuse your cunt, his fingers repeatedly hitting that spongey spot inside of you that caused you to whine, your walls clenching down on them. “Need your cock, not your fingers” 

“Baby, I told you, you aren’t gonna get rid of me that easily. I want you to squirt on my fingers like a good girl and then maybe I will give you my cock” 

He went back to abusing your poor hole, his fingers thrusting inside of you as he bent down, running his tongue across your cunt, lapping at the essence of your cum as your legs shook around him. 

“Innie, please it’s too much” you whined, but he didn’t listen. 

“Take it like a good girl or else I won’t let you cum for the rest of the month. Is that really what you want baby? To not even be able to be near my cock?” 

“No, wanna be a good girl for you, it just hurts” you whined, writhing underneath him once again, trying to press your legs together to stop him from abusing your poor little cunt.  

“What did I say?” he growled, slapping your face and then grabbing your cheeks in between his hand, forcing you to stare directly at him, unable to look away. 

“You are acting too much like a brat. If you want to cum that bad, then fucking cum” 

That was the push you needed. You squirted everywhere. Covering the bed, his naked torso, and boxers with your essence. 

He laughed as you squirmed underneath him, trying to run away as his fingers began abusing your poor clit, causing more to flow out of you. 

“Fuck baby, who would of that you were just a fucking slut that just needed to be slapped” he chuckled, kissing your lips. 

“Such a good little girl for me” he whispered into your ear as he used his hand to brush your hair back, allowing him to look at your face. 

You couldn’t even respond, your entire body felt like it was floating his voice entering one ear and leaving the other as you sunk deeper into the mattress. 

“My perfect little girl” he whispered into your ear before kissing your cheek, admiring the mess you had made. 

“Ready to take my cock” he grinned, pulling down his boxers. 

All you could do was nod, unable to fully comprehend what was going on as he caressed your thighs, rubbing himself along your thighs and pussy, capturing your mess with his cock. 

He slowly pushed inside of you groaning at how you were tightening around him, your pussy pulling him in like a fucking vice.

“Fuck baby, you feel so good. My princess was made for my cock, wasn’t she?” he whimpered, pulling your legs around his hips, allowing him to fuck you deeper. He slowly fucked into you trying to find a pace that would cause you to squirt once more. 

You simply whined, barely able to process anything other than the way his cock felt inside of you, repeatedly bullying your G-spot with every thrust. 

“Fuck, taking my cock so well, that’s it”

He kept thrusting inside of you, picking up his pace as he reached down capturing your clit in between his fingers, pinching it as he kissed your lips capturing every moan. 

He could feel you were close, your past orgasms allowing you to get to your edge quicker. Your body seized underneath him, his own starting to feel fatigued due to the only support being his knees and forearms.  

“Fuck, there we are baby. Cum for me, cum for daddy” he moaned as he kissed your neck. 

You couldn’t control it any longer, squirting on his cock as he brutally thrust into you, chasing his own high.

“There we go baby, take my cum, take daddy’s cum” he groaned before cumming inside of you, painting your walls white with his seed.

He fell on top of you, his body pressed against yours, his cock softening inside of you. 

“Gonna clean up?” you whispered into his ear, using your last bit of strength to push away his sweaty hair. 

“Later, wanna lay here with you” he whispered back before kissing your forehead, snuggling deeper into you. 

“Okay, later” 

[nana-au]

Eren Jaeger Loves Taking Photos of You

₊˚ପ⊹ fluff + smut - MDNI

₊˚ପ⊹ warnings: consensual photo taking, m! masturbation, oral m! receiving,  slight oral f! receiving, p in v sex lol (no protection) 

₊˚ପ⊹ word count: 1.3k

₊˚ପ⊹ not proof read im sowwy

𓂃⊹ ִֶָ

Eren loves taking photos of you. 

It reminds him of the first time he saw you - on Sasha’s private snap. You were in pajamas with your hair tied up out of your face. Your hand covered your mouth, obviously mid laugh when Sasha snapped the picture. He felt like he was gut punched, maybe even a little offended Sasha never mentioned you. Why would she? He doesn’t know, but he does feel betrayed. Mikasa was next to you, leaning on your shoulder for the picture. The caption: ‘movie night with these girls’ followed by a heart emoji. Maybe if he wasn’t so enthralled by you he would feel shame for sliding up, asking for your socials. I mean, if you're Sasha and Mikasa’s friend, it was only a matter of time you would be his too. What’s the harm in speeding up the process?

The second photo was a group photo. Jean, Connie, Armin, Mikasa, Sasha, Eren, and of course you. The group photo wasn’t his idea but he was adament it was taken on his phone. He noted you covered your smile again. He remembered making a mental note at the time that he needed to get you out of your shell. 

More photos followed after the night he convinced you your face was nothing to hide. You two still weren’t together yet, but the tension between you two wasn’t going unnoticed by the group. Your legs would rub against each other when you were sat side by side with him. He found any excuse to touch you. Adjusting your fly away’s, wiping the ice cream off your chin, whispering jokes in your ear to name a few. You did the same, shoving his shoulder when he said something cheeky. Or grabbing his biceps when walking side by side. You swore every time you grabbed him you would never get over how strong he felt. The night he told you he wished you weren’t so camera shy was the night you spilled your feelings to him. How you developed later in life and that you always felt behind your peers. You grew up the odd kid and you still struggled to fathom you weren’t still that awkward girl from high school. It was just the two of you on the loveseat of Armin and his shared apartment. He squeezed your thigh and his genuine eyes spoke to you before his words did. “You are really a sight for sore eyes.”

Even as just friends you felt more loved than you had ever felt from another human being before. Because of this, it felt incredibly natural becoming his girlfriend. The flash of his phone’s camera became more prevelant than before. He insisted taking pictures of you dressed up pretty for your dates or when you were sleeping soundly in his arms.

In the back of his mind he always knew the next step to his new hobby of photography. It came to a head one night with his hands in his pants while he panted against his pillow. His bottom lip was between his teeth and his fist was becoming sloppy imagining you spread open and allowing him to take a picture of it. Afterwards, he wouldn’t be able to get it out of his head, but he was still scared to bring it up to you. He didn’t want you to be uncomfortable - you had only recently stopped shying away from his lense. He couldn’t ruin that for you. But the nights he pondered the mental image of you letting him capture your most delicate moments pushed him to the edge unbelievably fast. His hot cum would shoot onto his stomach and cover his hand. He used to think it was impossible for him to have such a large load until his fantasies started. 

He decided the digital form of your naked body was a no-go. That’s why he bought his first polaroid. He asked for your permission of course,  promising it would be kept between you and him only. He used it during the first time you went down on him. It was hard at first to lift up the camera, he was too lost in the pleasure of your tongue. Your mouth fit him perfectly even though you were nervous he would fit. He knew he would, and he knew you would make him feel this good. He massaged your jaw each time you took him deeper. His fingers lightly stroked your throat as he lined up the camera. Click. He set the photo down next to him, getting ready for the next. “Look at me sweet girl,” he cooed. Your eyes reached his. Click. Another photo joined him on the bed. You were on your knees in front of him, taking him in the back of your throat. You tasted the salty precum every time you ran your tongue against his head. His head lolled back for awhile, basking in the feeling of your tight throat. His hips moved into yours, but only lightly. He didn’t want to hurt you. He wanted to wait till the end to see the developed photos but he couldn’t muster the patience needed. He picked up the last one he took, your doe eyes looking at him with pure love. He groaned, professing his undying loyalty to you and your warm wet mouth. You were such a good girl, wanting to swallow his cum when he came but he knew what needed to happen. He gripped your hair and pulled you off of him, requesting you to close your eyes. He spilled his seed all over your face, cumming loud against your features. When he was done he rubbed his tip against your lips and you opened your eyes, not expecting one final click. He praised you all day about how beautiful you were. That you were meant for the camera. 

You were most nervous for the day he wanted to take pictures of your wet pussy stuffed full with his cock. He spent an hour warming you up for it. Lapping at your clit with his tongue, using his index finger to tease the entrance of your pussy. He wouldn’t give it all to you, making sure to leave restless. Restless and ready. By the time he pushed himself in you were dripping against his cock. If he wasn’t so determined to photograph the moment he could have easily been lost in the bliss of your plush walls. He pushed himself as far as he could go, causing you to mewl out at how deep he was. His hand pressed down against your stomach and he snapped a picture. He allowed to lose himself for the moments it took to development. Skin slapping against skin as you gripped at his thighs. He made sure to praise you through all of it. Your pussy was heaven. You looked so sexy under him. You were such a good girl for letting him savor this for later. He pulled your legs completely over his shoulder, locking you in with one arm. The other lined up for yet another photo of his member deep inside you. He threw the camera down as it developed, going slow and sweet talking you. He needed to let you know how much he appreciated this. He reached down to play with your clit and you were quick to fall apart. You secretly loved the photos as much as he did. Seeing the ones of you taking his cock in your mouth turned you on more than you thought it would. You couldn’t wait to see the ones he was taking and you came hard at the thought of being able to see you stuffed full of him. He rode you through your climax before manipulating your body onto all fours, pounding you hard, determined to cum too. “You were made for me, huh?” He asked and you replied incoherently. Your walls gripped his length at the thought of what was to come; His semen that was about to spill into you.

He thought he would pass out once he finally saw it. His cum spilling out of your folds, you whining at the feeling. He lines up his camera one last time for the day. Click.

[exhaslo]

Over-Time Ch16

(CEO!Miguel x Shy/Clumsy!Reader)

Ch1, Ch2, Ch3, Ch4,Ch5, Ch6, Ch7, Ch8, Ch9, Ch10, Ch11, Ch12, Ch13, Ch14, Ch15

Warning: MINORS DNI, SMUT, sexual thoughts, slow-burn, mentions of sex, bullying, cussing, fluff, touch starved, shower sex

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

You felt like you were in a movie.

Penthouses like this only existed there! Who would have thought that people truly lived in homes like this. For whatever reason, you thought Miguel would have a regular apartment like you.

You forgot that he was a CEO.

Miguel's bathroom felt nearly the size of your own little apartment. It was large and quiet fancy. Hell, he had a hot tub, a regular stone tub and a large, beautiful rainfall shower.

"Whoa, does your toilet speak too?" You asked, honestly curious at this point.

"Haha,"

Miguel burst into a small fit of laughter towards your cuteness. He took your hand and started to kiss you. Pressing you against the wall, Miguel reached his hand towards the shower, turning the water on with ease.

"Mhpm, Miguel~"

"Have another question?" Miguel asked as he took off his shirt.

You tried to say something, but Miguel captured your lips with another passionate kiss. His tongue exploring your mouth as his hands worked their magic. Your clothes slipping off with ease one after the other.

"W-What...mhm~ What d-desires...do you have?" You asked between kisses.

Miguel grunted softly as he took off the rest of your clothes. He took his off and pressed you against the shower wall...Water rolling down your skin.

"A family," Miguel groaned as he lifted you up, causing you to wrap your legs around his waist, "Kids of my own."

Your heart started to race as Miguel stared into your eyes. His harden dick rubbing against your dripping crotch. Your body grew hotter, feeling Miguel's growing sex drive. All it took was one sentence and you would be Miguel's all night.

"Hah, that's...sweet," You managed to say, wishing to have Miguel ravish your entire being, but not yet.

"After we deal with this mess, I'll make sure to fill you so much, (Y/N). I want you to have my babies," Miguel groaned lowly.

"I'd like that,"

Honestly, you couldn't think straight. The steam from the shower along with Miguel's kisses and grinding was fogging your brain. All you could focus on was his touch and how much you wanted him to fuck you.

Wrapping your arms around Miguel's neck, you whimpered and whined as he teased your aching hole. His dick just poking against it, begging for entrance.

Like a starved man, Miguel's kisses became rougher. His grip tighten as he lifted you slightly. Your body arched slightly as you felt Miguel begin to enter your body.

The pain soon subsided as you felt full. Miguel made his home inside you, making sure to fill you to the brim. You had gotten used to the size of Miguel's dick by now. Sure, it still made your brain fuzzy, but it felt so good.

Clenching against his dick, you whimpered a moan. Miguel understood as he started to move. Unsure if it was the shower or you, everything felt hotter. Miguel was able to thrust into you with ease, sending shivers up your spine.

Resting your head into his shoulder, you tried to hold onto Miguel, but you felt your body grow weak with every thrust. His tip hitting your cervix with each thrust into you. His dick stretching you out and making a home inside your cunt.

Miguel gripped your ass as he pumped into you. Every thrust getting rougher and quicker. Pressing you against the wall, Miguel started to grunt and moan in your ear as you kept squeezing his cock.

"Fuck, want you now, (Y/N)." Miguel hissed.

Your head was getting foggy and it was getting slightly hard to breathe from the steam. Feeling the pool of heat getting more intense, you cried out a loud moan as you cam from another thrust.

"Good girl,"

"M-Mig," You muttered.

Miguel grunted as he held your hips, giving you a few more pumps before unloading inside you. Inhaling deeply, you whined softly as you felt your womb filling up. Relaxing for just a moment, you gasped as Miguel bend you down, your ass towards him.

"Miiiig," You whined, your chest pressed against the wall.

"Just once more," Miguel whispered in your ear, sliding his dick inside you again, "My cute clumsy, (Y/N). So perfect, taking my dick so well."

"Mhm~"

"Taking such good care of me," Miguel kissed your shoulders as his hips slapped into yours, "For staying with me."

"Ah~ Miguel~" You cried out.

Your legs were shaking and your arms grew weak. The pleasure was overwhelming you. Biting your lower lip as Miguel kept kissing your back, you leaned forward as his hands played with your breasts.

His dick feeling like it went deeper with each balls deep thrust Miguel gave you. Your pussy clenching and sucking him in more, begging for more. You were at war with your own body, desperate for more pleasure.

"God, it's so tempting to make you mine now, (Y/N)." Miguel grunted, kissing your ear, "I promise to tell you everything."

--------

Miguel grunted softly as he looked down at your naked body. Water streaming down your sides as he kept thrusting into you. Your head resting against the shower wall as your moans grew sloppier and louder.

Chuckling softly, Miguel groaned as you cam once more against him. He held your body up before giving you a final few thrusts. His seed pouring into you once more.

"I love you, (Y/N)." Miguel whispered in your ear before giving you a gentle kiss.

Lifting you up gently, Miguel made sure to wash you thoroughly. Your peaceful expression making him feel better about confessing to you. To think he managed to have someone like you.

His precious little mouse.

Miguel was determined to protect you. Miguel was determined to make sure that you knew everything about him. Just the thought of you leaving him hurt. The thought of Dana hurting you boiled Miguel's rage.

"I won't let her ruin this."

Miguel grunted softly as he finished washing you, drying you and then putting on his pajamas on you. Once he put on his own pants, Miguel grabbed his phone and decided to make a few phone calls.

This was something worth fighting for.

You were worth fighting for.

Miguel was not going to let Dana win this. He was going to do everything in his power to make sure that the two of you stay together without worries.

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Next Chapter

@timidquindim @decentsoupperson @ivkygirly @reader-1290 @daddyfroglegs @eepybunny0805 @ddreabea @iamperson12280 @migueloharasoulmate @tojishugetiddies @koko-1025 @hyeinwluv85s @daisy-artfield @migueloharastruelove @a-lil-whore @hcqwxrtss123 @the-pan-liquid @tojisfav @pochapo @bubblegumfanfictions @brighterthanlonelythoughts @ghstypaint @mangoslushcrush @synamonthy @scaleniusrm @moonspectorx @dorck26 @a060403 @lunablackcosplay @soraya-daydreams @lovefanfic1 @mymrsweirdnessshipperstuff-blog @pretty-pink-princesss @corpsebridenightamare @razertail18 @gachagator @droolingmuttt @miguelsfavwife @ryzguy06 @raideaters-blog @manishkaworld @keidilla @byjessicalotufo @pigeonmama @k3ythesapphic @acesangels @stealingyourturts @angel-xx-1 @amberbalcom14 @ofmenanduhhhwellmen @oscarissac2099 @keepghostly @zeyzeys-stuff @k3ythesapphic @nightingale1011 @uncle-eggy @safixiovi @flaps200 @dahehow @weirdothatwritess @gerblinradio @electronicchaoschaos @mafiaanomaly @keyisloved @unwrittenletter @reader4life @leenasgirl200 @oscarissac2099 @mari0-o @cinnamoro1l @leryg0 @hizzielover @resident-clown @girl-of-multi-fandoms @sana-408-blog

[leahrintarou]

✩₊˚.⋆ LOST & FOUND - dabi/touya todoroki

CW: y/n is lowkey on her death bed but has plot armor, dabi being his usual "uncaring" self, she/her pronouns, not anatomy specified, tinyyy bit of angst, "fluff", and yeah! lolzies

Word Count: 4.7k

Author's Note: hey guys! this was written a little bit before kinktober started but i decided to finish it up and post it now lol.

y/n's world had changed the moment she was captured. once a member of the league of villains, she now found herself imprisoned by the corrupted heroes who tortured her daily, trying to extract information on her allies. she endured three long, agonizing months of pain and suffering, but she refused to speak a word.

dabi had been relentless in his pursuit, growing more furious by the day. the league had tried multiple times to infiltrate the heroes' hideout, but each attempt had been thwarted. the heroes were prepared, and they were merciless. but dabi's patience wore thin. the constant failure stirred an unfamiliar feeling in him—a festering worry he struggled to ignore. he convinced himself it was nothing more than the desire to reclaim his teammate. nothing more, he told himself.

but then one day, the league found the location of y/n’s prison. the moment they had it, dabi stormed in without a second thought. blue flames burst forth from his fingertips, devouring anything in their path as he moved through the halls of the hideout, leaving nothing but charred destruction in his wake.

finally, he found her, barely conscious and bound in a small, cold cell. her eyes fluttered weakly open when she sensed his presence.

“still alive, huh?” dabi’s voice was rough, his words cutting. “can’t believe it. you look like death warmed over.”

y/n blinked up at him, too weak to retort. but he noticed the spark in her gaze hadn’t quite faded. he knelt down beside her, his expression hard, hiding the turbulence roiling in his chest. he used one hand to break her chains, though his grip was almost harsh.

“pathetic. you let them do this to you?” his voice was sharp, but the look in his eyes was almost soft.

“they…tried…” she mumbled, her lips dry and cracked, “but i didn’t…tell them anything.”

dabi huffed. “yeah, no kidding. would’ve burned this place down even if you had.”

as he scooped her into his arms, his touch was surprisingly gentle. she shivered, the warmth from his skin a comfort she hadn’t felt in months. his words stayed rough, his tone cold, but the way he held her told a different story.

“don’t get used to this,” he muttered, eyes trained forward as they escaped the hideout. “i didn’t come here to save you. just didn’t want to deal with all the whining if i let you die.”

y/n gasped as dabi carried her, the heat of his body a stark contrast to the coldness of her own skin. she tried to focus on his face, but the world around her faded in and out, blurring into an indistinguishable haze. every jolt of movement sent a sharp pain coursing through her, a reminder of the abuse she had endured. she winced, feeling her strength waning.

“put me down,” she whispered, her voice barely audible, but he kept moving, determined.

“shut up,” he replied curtly, his grip tightening slightly, as if he feared losing her.

another wave of pain shot through her, more intense than the last. her breath caught, and suddenly, she felt herself slipping. “touya…” she managed to say, her voice trembling. “i think i’m dying here.”

without warning, he stopped, the harshness in his demeanor cracking just for a moment. he lowered her gently to the ground, his eyes scanning her body with fierce intensity. she could see the worry flickering behind his cool facade, the flames that danced in his gaze reflecting a sense of urgency.

“where?” he demanded, a harsh edge to his voice as he knelt beside her. “where does it hurt?”

“everywhere,” she admitted, but a teasing smile crossed her lips despite the pain. “call me corny, but you should’ve seen the other guys. they looked worse than me.”

dabi narrowed his eyes, irritation flashing across his face at her joking manner. “this isn’t a joke, y/n.”

“you really think I’d let a bunch of wannabe heroes take me out that easily?” she shot back, though her voice wavered slightly. “they were no match for me. clearly, they didn’t get the memo that I’m not just some damsel in distress.”

“if you’re so tough, why are you lying on the ground?” he shot back, a sneer creeping into his voice. “you look like you’ve been run over by a train.”

“ow, harsh much?” she retorted, but the teasing tone was wavering. “can’t blame a girl for trying to make light of the situation.”

“you think this is funny?” he snapped, his eyes narrowing as he leaned closer. “you look like shit, and if you keep acting like this, you’ll actually die.”

“wouldn’t dream of it,” she replied, but another wave of pain shot through her, making her grimace. “but honestly, I’m tired, and I’m starting to think this might be a bit much for me.”

“good,” he grunted, his expression hardening again. “maybe this will teach you not to underestimate your enemies next time.”

“you’re a real gem, you know that?” she said, rolling her eyes even as tears threatened to spill. “if I survive this, I’m definitely getting you a trophy for ‘worst rescue ever.’”

“you’re lucky I’m even here,” he said coldly, his gaze flicking over her injuries. “you should be thanking me instead of cracking jokes.”

“thank you, touya,” she said, her voice softening for a moment. “seriously.”

he huffed, looking away, but she could see the tension in his shoulders. “just don’t make me regret saving you, okay?”

“no promises,” she replied with a weak grin, but the teasing edge in her voice was fading. “you know I’m too stubborn for that.”

“you’re a damn fool, y/n,” he muttered, the frustration evident in his voice as he wiped away a tear that had escaped down her cheek. “you think you’re invincible, but look where that’s gotten you. this isn’t a game.”

“i know that,” she said, the teasing tone gone as she felt the gravity of her situation. “but I’m not ready to die here. I still have too many things to do.”

“you better pull yourself together then,” he snapped, his voice harsh but the underlying concern evident. “because I’m not carrying a corpse out of here.”

“no need to get dramatic, touya,” she replied, trying to muster the strength for a smile. “I’m not dead yet.”

“you’re damn lucky I don’t just leave you here,” he grumbled, but the way he looked at her was a mix of annoyance and something softer. “now, let’s get moving before they come back.”

he scooped her up again, his grip firm yet careful. together, they would face whatever awaited them outside. and even in the chaos around them, y/n couldn’t shake the feeling that, despite his harsh words, there was something deeper in his concern—something that gave her strength even as her body protested.

“don’t drop me, or I swear I’ll haunt you,” she said, her voice light despite the pain.

“like I’d ever let you go,” he replied, though his tone remained sharp. “now shut up and focus. we’re getting out of this hellhole.”

as he carried her away from the ashes of their enemies, y/n held onto the resolve within her, refusing to let despair take hold. and while dabi kept his distance, his harsh demeanor hiding the concern beneath, she knew that as long as they were together, they would fight to survive.

----

the familiar sights and sounds of the league’s hideout enveloped y/n like a comforting blanket, but that sense of safety was overshadowed by the pain that coursed through her body. dabi carried her through the entrance, his presence a steady anchor amid the chaos of their return.

“get the hell out of my way.” he spoke as they passed several members who rushed to meet them, concern etched on their faces. “she’s injured, and you all need to back off. she doesn’t need a dozen people hovering over her right now.”

“dabi!” twice called from the other side of the room, his expression darkening at the sight of y/n’s condition. “what happened?”

“later,” dabi snapped, brushing past him and heading down the hall toward his room. “just make sure they don’t crowd her. she’s had enough of that shit already.”

y/n barely registered the exchange as her head lolled against dabi’s shoulder. her strength was fading fast, and the pain was creeping back in, clawing at her insides. the world blurred again as he opened the door to his room, setting her down gently on his bed.

“stay put,” he said tersely, stepping back. “I’ll be right back. I need to talk to shigaraki.”

as the door clicked shut, y/n felt a wave of despair wash over her. the warmth of the room felt suffocating, and all the bravado she had tried to maintain crumbled. she pulled her knees to her chest, a shaky breath escaping her as she allowed the tears to spill over.

“damn it,” she whispered, her voice breaking. she buried her face against her knees, the memories of her time with the heroes crashing over her like a tidal wave. the pain, the torture, the isolation—it all hit her at once, leaving her gasping for air.

she clenched her fists, hating how vulnerable she felt. the sobs bubbled up, and she let them come, tears soaking into her knees as she tried to muffle the sounds. she cursed herself under her breath, her nails digging into her palms. “just keep it together.” she muttered repeatedly.

after a few agonizing moments, the door swung open again, and dabi stepped inside. his expression shifted from irritation to confusion at the sight of her in such a state.

“what the hell is up with you?” he demanded, his voice harsh. “you’re back home, and you’re crying? what’s wrong now?”

y/n quickly wiped her tears away, trying to compose herself as best she could. “oh, you know me,” she said, attempting to keep her tone light despite the tremor in her voice. “just enjoying a little spa day here.”

dabi’s brows furrowed, and he stepped closer, concern leaking through his aggression. “this isn’t a joke, y/n. you look like you’re about to pass out. get it together.”

“easy for you to say,” she shot back, her snark returning as she wiped her cheeks dry, though more tears slipped past her efforts. “some of us don’t have fire powers to keep us warm and cozy.”

“seriously, what’s the point of acting like this?” he asked, exasperation lacing his tone. “if you’re hurt, just say it instead of pretending you’re fine.”

“i’m fine,” she insisted, though the quiver in her voice betrayed her. “just a little sore, that’s all.”

“y/n, you’re not fooling anyone,” he growled, frustration bubbling under the surface. “if you’re feeling like this, you need to tell me. it’s not going to help if you just sit here and cry like a baby.”

“what do you want me to say?” she snapped, tears streaming down her cheeks again despite her efforts. “that they broke me? that they got under my skin? well, they did! and it hurt like hell! but you don’t get it, do you?”

dabi flinched at her words, but he quickly masked it with a scowl. “no, I don’t get it, because I don’t go around feeling sorry for myself. I’m not going to let you wallow in your own misery. we’ve got enough problems without you adding to them.”

“thanks for the pep talk, touya,” she shot back, a bitter smile crossing her face even as she choked on her emotions. “you really know how to lift a girl’s spirits.”

“you want to be tough, fine. but don’t think I won’t notice when you’re falling apart,” he replied, his tone sharp but lacking malice. “if you’re in pain, just admit it. we’ll figure it out together.”

“don’t count on me getting soft just because I’m hurt,” she said defiantly, though she could feel the tears still falling, an irritating reminder of her vulnerability. “I’m still me.”

“whatever helps you sleep at night,” he said dismissively, but there was an undertone of concern in his voice. “but don’t think for a second I won’t drag you back from the edge if I have to.”

y/n took a shaky breath, wiping her eyes one last time. “you really know how to make a girl feel special, don’t you?”

“shut up,” he grumbled, but the hint of a smirk tugged at the corners of his mouth. “you’re an idiot. just remember that.”

with that, the tension in the room shifted slightly, but yn knew she still had a long way to go. she would heal, but she’d do it in her own way. with dabi at her side, even if he acted like a jerk sometimes, she felt a little less alone. together, they would figure this out, one step at a time.

the room fell into an uneasy silence, broken only by y/n’s occasional sniffles as she fought to regain her composure. the tension in the air was thick, a mix of unspoken words and emotions swirling between them. dabi stood a few feet away, his expression conflicted as he watched her struggle.

“you’re really gonna keep crying, huh?” he finally broke the silence, his tone somewhere between annoyance and concern. he wasn’t used to this—seeing someone so vulnerable and broken, especially someone like y/n who had always been a source of defiance and strength.

y/n shrugged, wiping her face with the back of her hand. “what can I say? it’s a real downer to be tortured by wannabe heroes. I’m just processing.”

“yeah, well, you can process without the waterworks,” he muttered, but he took a step closer. something inside him stirred—a mix of protectiveness and frustration that he couldn’t quite shake off.

“easier said than done,” she replied, her voice shaky. “this is new territory for me.”

dabi rolled his eyes, but he found himself moving closer, drawn by an impulse he didn’t fully understand. he stood beside her, casting a long shadow over the bed. “you look like you could use something other than a pity party,” he said, his tone gruff but softer than before.

“what do you suggest? a party for one?” she replied, trying to muster a smirk. “at least I can invite you to the festivities.”

“real funny,” he said, his voice laced with sarcasm, but he settled beside her on the bed. the moment their shoulders brushed, a warmth spread through him, grounding the storm of emotions swirling inside.

“what are you doing?” y/n asked, surprise evident in her voice.

“shut up and stop crying,” he ordered, leaning back against the wall and crossing his arms. “it’s annoying.”

“so, your solution is to sit here and be annoyed with me?” she shot back, but there was a hint of gratitude in her voice.

“just be quiet for a second,” he replied, his voice low. “you look like you need a break from all the bullshit.”

y/n paused, feeling the weight of his presence beside her. the warmth radiating from him was oddly comforting. she took a shaky breath, attempting to gather herself. “you’re surprisingly good at this, touya,” she said quietly.

“don’t get used to it,” he replied, but his expression softened slightly. without thinking, he reached over and placed a hand on her back, applying just enough pressure to ground her in the moment. it was a gesture that felt intimate, yet he kept his gaze trained away, focused on the wall.

“this is weird,” y/n murmured, feeling the heat of his hand seep through her shirt. “you actually care, huh?”

“don’t push it,” he replied, but there was no bite in his tone. “just… don’t fall apart on me, alright? I didn’t come all this way to babysit you.”

“fine, fine. I’ll try to keep my emotions in check,” she promised, though the corners of her mouth lifted slightly.

“good,” he said, letting out a frustrated sigh. “because if you keep this up, I’m going to start worrying, and that’s not something I want to deal with.”

the room fell silent again, the only sound being the occasional sniffle from y/n as she struggled to regain her composure. the warmth of dabi’s hand on her back was a steady reminder that she wasn’t alone. she leaned into it slightly, finding comfort in his presence, even if it was begrudgingly given.

“you really are the worst,” she said after a moment, her voice quieter. “but I guess I’ll take what I can get.”

“just remember that when you’re back to being a smartass,” he replied, pulling his hand away as he straightened up. “I can’t have you getting soft on me, or I’ll have to do something drastic.”

“like what?” she challenged, a hint of her old fire returning. “give me a pep talk about how I should fight harder next time?”

“exactly,” he smirked, a glimmer of amusement shining through the hardened exterior he maintained. “or maybe I’ll just throw you back to those heroes and let them finish what they started.”

“now that’s just mean,” y/n said, a smile breaking through her tears. “you’re supposed to be my rescuer, not my tormentor.”

“like I said, don’t get used to it,” he shot back, though his tone held a playful edge. “but don’t think I’m letting you off easy just because you’ve had a rough patch.”

“wouldn’t dream of it,” she replied, her heart lighter as they settled into an uneasy camaraderie. even with the pain still throbbing in her body, the warmth of their banter eased the ache in her soul.

“just… get some rest,” he added, standing up and moving toward the door. “I’ll be back. try not to cry more than necessary.”

“no promises, touya,” she teased, watching him with a fondness that surprised her.

as the door clicked shut behind him, y/n let out a small breath, feeling a flicker of hope ignite within her. maybe she wasn’t as alone as she thought, even in the depths of despair.

the night stretched on, silence enveloping the hideout as the rest of the league settled into their routines. hours passed since dabi had left y/n in his room, and he found himself thinking about her more than he cared to admit. when he finally returned, he opened the door quietly, the soft creak of the hinges breaking the stillness.

he paused for a moment, taking in the sight of her sleeping form curled up on his bed. her face was peaceful, the pain temporarily eased by the escape of sleep. a hint of softness crept into his expression, but he quickly masked it with annoyance. he didn’t have time for this sentimental crap.

“tch,” he muttered under his breath, walking over to the bed. he slid in beside her, the warmth of the covers wrapping around him. almost instinctively, she shuffled, sensing his presence even in her sleep.

“what are you doing?” she mumbled, her voice thick with drowsiness as she blinked up at him. “this is my room, you know?”

“it’s my fucking bed, dumbass,” dabi shot back, trying to keep his voice steady despite the flicker of amusement in his eyes.

“oh shit… my bad,” she replied, realization washing over her. y/n attempted to sit up, but a sharp jolt of pain shot through her body, making her gasp. she winced, her hands instinctively pressing against her side.

“the fuck are you doing, y/n?” dabi snapped, concern bleeding through his irritation as he watched her struggle.

“just… trying to get back to my room,” she replied, gritting her teeth against the pain. “I’m fine, really.”

“you’re clearly not fine,” he growled, sitting up and placing a firm hand on her shoulder, gently but insistently pushing her back down. “you need to rest. are you trying to kill yourself?”

“it’s not that bad,” she insisted, but the tremor in her voice betrayed her. she could feel the pain intensifying, a reminder of the hell she’d endured.

dabi narrowed his eyes at her stubbornness. “let me see,” he demanded, shifting closer. he placed a hand on her side, applying gentle pressure. the moment he pressed down, y/n let out a wince, the pain flaring anew.

“wtf was that for, touya?!” she exclaimed, irritation flashing in her eyes as she shot him a glare, even though it was obvious she was still hurting.

“get it through your head. you’re not invincible,” he replied, his voice steady but laced with a hint of frustration. he could see the pain etched on her features, and it made something twist in his gut.

“thanks for the reminder, but I didn’t need you to be a jackass about it,” she retorted, her voice sharp despite the way her breath hitched from the lingering pain. she winced again as she shifted, trying to find a more comfortable position.

“you think this is easy for me?” dabi shot back, his tone harsher than he intended. he sighed, running a hand through his hair. “just sit still, okay? it’ll help.”

with a reluctant nod, she settled back against the pillows, but he could see the way her body was tense, how she was fighting against the pain. he felt a surge of annoyance at himself for not being able to do more. “look,” he started, his voice softer now, “I’m just trying to help. you really need to rest.”

she met his gaze, the stubborn fire still in her eyes but dimmed by fatigue. “fine,” she murmured, allowing her head to lean back against the wall as she closed her eyes for a moment, trying to breathe through the discomfort.

dabi’s irritation faded as he watched her. she was strong, but even the toughest needed support. without thinking, he shifted closer, wrapping an arm around her shoulders. she tensed slightly at first, but then relaxed into him, seeking the warmth he offered.

“there. it’s not a big deal,” he muttered, trying to sound nonchalant, but the hint of protectiveness seeped through.

“you’re such a softy, touya,” y/n teased, though her voice was weaker, softer now. “I can’t believe you’re actually cuddling with me.”

“shut up,” he replied, his tone defensive. “this is just practical. it’s warmer, and you need to stop shivering.”

“practical, huh?” she echoed, snuggling a bit closer to him. “sure, keep telling yourself that.”

dabi rolled his eyes but didn’t push her away. he found himself relishing the quiet moment, the way her breathing began to slow as she relaxed against him. it felt oddly comforting, and he couldn’t deny the warmth spreading through him.

the silence wrapped around them like a thick blanket, filled only by the soft sounds of y/n's breathing. she nestled closer into dabi’s side, the heat radiating from him providing comfort against the chill of her lingering pain. he shifted slightly, instinctively tightening his hold around her shoulders.

after a few moments, y/n broke the quiet. “did you miss me?” she asked, her voice barely above a whisper. she turned her head slightly to gauge his reaction, a teasing smile dancing on her lips, despite the weight of the question.

dabi’s brow furrowed as he looked down at her, his expression a mix of annoyance and something softer. “you think I have time to miss anyone?” he replied, his tone gruff, but there was an underlying warmth there that didn’t go unnoticed.

“come on, it’s a simple question,” she pressed, trying to suppress a smile. “you could just say yes, you know.”

he sighed, running a hand through his hair, a hint of exasperation in his eyes. “fine. maybe I missed you a little,” he admitted, his voice begrudgingly honest. “not that I’d tell anyone else.”

“oh really?” she said, feigning surprise. “a little? I’d say I was gone for quite a while. you should have been lonely without me.”

“lonely? hardly,” he scoffed, though she could see the flicker of amusement in his eyes. “I had plenty of things to keep me occupied. but yeah, it was… quieter.”

y/n smiled at that, feeling a warmth blossom in her chest. “I guess I was kind of fun to have around,” she teased lightly.

“you were more annoying than fun,” he shot back, but the corner of his mouth twitched upward. “always getting in the way. but I guess it’s better than having nothing to deal with.”

“so, you missed my annoying self then?” she prodded, enjoying this back-and-forth.

“shut up,” he muttered, but there was no real bite to his words. “just don’t go getting yourself captured again. I don’t want to deal with the consequences.”

as the night deepened, the soft glow from the single lamp in the corner of the room cast a warm light over y/n and dabi. she could hear the faint sounds of the league moving about outside, but in this moment, it felt like they were the only two in existence. she relaxed further into his side, feeling a strange sense of safety she hadn’t felt in months.

“you know,” she began, her voice trailing off as she considered her words, “being away from all of you… it was different. I didn’t think I’d miss it, but I did.”

“what, the chaos?” dabi replied, arching an eyebrow. “you’re telling me you missed all the arguing, the plans going wrong, and the constant danger?”

“maybe not the danger,” she admitted, a small laugh escaping her lips. “but yeah, I missed the thrill. I missed you guys.” she paused, glancing up at him. “I even missed your terrible sense of humor.”

“my humor is perfect,” he shot back, a smirk creeping onto his face. “you just don’t understand true comedy.”

“right, keep telling yourself that,” she teased, then grew serious for a moment. “but really, I just… I missed being part of something. even if it is a little chaotic.”

dabi’s expression softened slightly, and he nodded. “I get it. being alone sucks. but you’re not alone anymore. we’re all messed up in our own ways, but we look out for each other. that’s what makes this whole thing work.”

“yeah, I know,” she said softly, her heart swelling at his words. “and I’m grateful for that. I never thought I’d find a place where I truly belonged, especially here.”

“well, don’t go getting all mushy on me now,” he replied, trying to mask the warmth flooding his chest with a chuckle. “I’d hate to ruin my tough-guy reputation.”

“too late for that,” she said with a smirk. “you’ve already cuddled with me, remember? tough guy or not, you’ve got a soft spot.”

“shut up,” he muttered, but he couldn’t suppress the slight blush creeping onto his cheeks. “just don’t get too comfortable with the whole cuddling thing.”

“too late,” y/n said, a playful glint in her eyes. “I think I might just make this a regular occurrence.”

dabi rolled his eyes but didn’t pull away. instead, he leaned back against the pillows, pulling her with him. “whatever. just don’t expect me to go easy on you when you’re back to being a pain in the ass.”

they lay there in silence, the warmth between them easing the tension and exhaustion that had been building for so long. y/n shifted slightly, pressing a soft kiss to dabi’s neck, her lips lingering just a moment before she pulled back. she felt his muscles tense, and she looked up, half-expecting him to scold her.

"y/n," he murmured, voice firm but with an edge of something softer. she looked up at him, searching his eyes, caught off guard by the intensity there. before she could say anything, he leaned in, capturing her lips in a kiss that started slow, almost hesitant, then deepened, as if he was trying to say everything he couldn't put into words.

her hands found their way to his shoulders, fingers curling into the fabric of his shirt as she kissed him back, feeling the tension drain from her body. she melted into him, their breaths mingling, the world fading until it was just the two of them. the kiss was a silent promise, a reminder of all they'd been through and the unspoken connection that tethered them together.

finally, they broke apart, foreheads resting against each other, and y/n whispered, "goodnight, touya."

"night, idiot."

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Tag: @ririkavitanitraxova02

[linnienin]

🦋 A s t e r o i d ⁕ S i r e n e ⁕(1009) 🦋 i n ⁕ t h e ⁕ h o u s e s

How they seduce you, and how you can make them FAIL THEIR PLAN 😈

Hello gorgeous mermaids ✨🧜‍♀️🧜‍♂️

I hope you're doing well 🌸

I finally wrote the "Sirene in the houses" post! And added a little treat to reward you for your patience 👀

Enjoy 🦋

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Disclaimer: These are my PERSONAL THOUGHTS on an asteroid we know very little about, i am researching it and trying to understand it to the best of my abilities. Take what resonates

Disclaimer 2: This post is for entertainment purposes mostly, don't use these methods at home kids 💖

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⁕ I n t e r p r e t a t i o n ⁕ g u i d e :

The "How to make them fail their plan" paragraphs were formed using the theory "opposites attracts".

I tried to decipher every Sirene in the houses's possible behaviour and how to strike back using the unknown (to them) force of the energy from the opposite house.

Remember, this is MY THEORY and this post is meant to entertain and add some useful infos, like the Celebs examples for each house...yep, curious of knowing who they are? 👀

Keep reading 🦋

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⁕ 1ST HOUSE : Masters at knowing how to use their body. Naturally mesmerizing, they'll use their mannerism, their seductive and entrancing aura and expressions to get you do what they want. Usually these natives don't even need to speak a word to capture you, their confidence and self-assurance makes them appear as the ultimate trophy everyone wants. This placement can trigger other people's deepest insecurities... "do i have what it takes to win them?". Needless to say, Sirene in 1H individuals have seen it all, all the clownery and the ludicrous attempts from others to get them, while they stand in their confidence, looking at them making them think they catched their attention. But these natives, they're not as impossible to break as them make it seems... (they have been over-sexualised and judged on their appeareance for a long time, and want someone that goes beyond their looks, a partner in crime, someone that is serious in their approach and know how to share, instead of keeping everything for themselves)

⁕ 💥 HOW TO MAKE THEM FAIL THEIR PLAN: Show them you notice them (i mean, it's impossible not to) but you consider them as normal people like everyone else in the room. They'll wonder why you don't get showy and greedy over them, and you'll spark their curiosity, they'll feel a sense of tranquility in looking at you being social with others and treat people with good manners. Because they've seen extremes, your balanced persona will make them feel it safe to approach you.

⁕ Celebrities examples of Sirene in 1H: Eva Green, Debra Paget, Bella Hadid, Angelina Jolie, Grace Kelly, Selena Gomez, Anne Hathaway, Zoe Kravitz, Grace Jones, Elvis Presley, Jennifer Lawrence

Click HERE to see an exclusive post on Sirene in 1H

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⁕ 2ND HOUSE: Expensive lovers of sensations. They will attract them using bad or good ways, and because they know these sensations way too well, they also will set a trap for others making those people fall for them with their sensational methods. They will seduce you with their looks, touch, smell, voice and the taste of their kiss (or well, they could prepare you a sensational meal too hehhe). As soon as your 5 senses are triggered you'll only want more. These people use the human's carnal sin as their bait, they know perfectly how much to give to receive 10x more from their prey. They could even seduce you by showing how much money they have or their expensive possessions. Or could seduce to gain those material needs. (can have self-worth insecurities, so they'll persuade people sometimes only to get validation from them and to feel a sense of victory from winning their prey, so they can feel better about themselves)

⁕ 💥 HOW TO MAKE THEM FAIL THEIR PLAN: Show them control of yourself, especially control of your vulnerable side. They will not know how to get you if you show no problem in resisting their seductive attempts, they will instead be confused by you and take them back to avoid looking stupid (again, they can suffer from self-worth image so they'll feel riddiculous and they'll go find another prey to fill their self-esteem with), but if you want to reverse the situation, open up to them and make them feel like they're the only one worthy of knowing your vulnerable side, they'll love it and they'll fall for it.

⁕ Celebrities examples of Sirene in 2H: Beyonce, Lily Rose Depp, Michelle Pfeiffer, Naomi Campbell, Princess Diana

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⁕ 3RD HOUSE: "Welcome tributes to the 29372992 edition of Mind Games" ,and may the odds be in your favour because 3H Sirene natives have always won it. Sneaky, Clever, smart asses, these natives knows how to get to It quickly: a little smirk, the right word, a playful touch, and they've already hijacked your brain circuit. They love to confuse you with their double face game, looking at your pathetic and obvious reactions. You're going to feel like you're their partner in crime, their special someone, but all their pretty words, their quotes from your favourite poetry book, they ain't for nothing...their eyes are stuck on that prize, and you're just in their way. These natives love cars and driving. Could seduce you to buy them a car, give them a ride, or ride them on it 🙊. They could manipulate your siblings to get to you (and even get them both sistah and brothah). Spread rumors like it's nothing and be so good at hiding their face behind an innocent persona.They're quick and witty, it's extremely difficult to caught them slip unless...

⁕ 💥 HOW TO MAKE THEM FAIL THEIR PLAN: ...you observe their game from a higher perspective. They're very detailed individuals, so their weak point lays in the bigger picture. They can't be everywhere at the same time, if you show them you got the higher ground they can't reach you with simple words. Show them you are worthy of completing their game, show them your spiritual side, your deeper knowledge, words they've never heard about, they're extremely curious beings , and if they consider you interesting enough, they'll respect you and listen to what you can bring to their table of knowledge, if you pass their test, soon you'll hear the engine of their car and them approaching you saying "get it loser, we're going to play with people's minds"

⁕ Celebrities examples of Sirene in 3H: Elizabeth Taylor, Emma Watson, Halle Berry, Honor Blackman, Johnny Depp

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⁕ 4TH HOUSE: Cuddles that cage you. Such a sweet cutie pie right? Well, check your cholesterol levels because a too darn nice gesture from these natives can reveal itself as a fatal dose. They know the strings to pull to get your heart, and believe me my friends, if they get you to feel a nice comfy cozy presence that makes you feel at home, don't get too comfortable because they're about to cut that heart of yours in slices of cake to satisfy their bitter palate. Masters at emotional manipulation, they get your heart, they get your favours. And you'll feel so good about it won't you? They're giving all those nice smiles, warm hugs, puppy eyes, how could such a lovely little thing has shady thoughts right? Oh dear, you already fell into that trap didn't you...ohhh they're sobbing... nono, listen to me, don't rush to them, there's something more you need to know...(these natives actually never felt a sense of belonging, they didn't receive affection from their family, they don't really know what it truly means to have a home to return to)

⁕ 💥 HOW TO MAKE THEM FAIL THEIR PLAN: Show them you're a mature person, and that you won't play with childish people. Show them you get the job done, and you have earned and built a place with seriousness and competence, you serve people you are loyal to, and their loyalty awaits for you every single time you get to them, back to the place you call home. They will fall for your confidence and devotion, they'll want to become one of those loyal people you care for so much, they'll want to experience your genuine feelings and learn how it must be to feel them personally too.

⁕ Celebrities examples of Sirene in 4H: Marilyn Monroe, Rihanna, Jane Russel, Barbara Bach

⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕

⁕ 5TH HOUSE: "I'll paint you like one of my french girls". Artistic, creative and smokey hot individuals. Their acting is flawlessly on point, they will dramatically impersonate the character you have a crush on. They'll show you their beautiful sketches and suddenly you're wearing the Heart of the Ocean, laying 💃au naturel💃 on an expensive sofa. Charming like the sun, they're the reincarnation of Apollo, they give you attention and seduce you by playing a hot chase. Beware of your position, the push and pull is not so cool if you're on the top of the Titanic with your arms wide open: one push, no pull and you're gone. But if you wanna catch their heart and not be catched by the ocean you'll need to resist their bright blind sunny aura by putting on sunglasses ,we're about getting✨ extra✨ too 🕶 (and don't forget the sunscreen!)

⁕ 💥 HOW TO MAKE THEM FAIL THEIR PLAN: Show them your rebellious side. Break their mirror into pieces, and the Gaston in them will go crazy. While they play with their ego to get attention, you play with your individuality and eccentricity not to get it. They'd wonder how such an introverted individual can arouse so many eyes without even trying! They'd get so jealous of you being unbothered of it, until you make them realize they're not embracing their true self, and you'll make them wonder how it should feel like to break free without caring about all those mirror scars...

⁕ Celebrities examples of Sirene in 5H: Margot Robbie, Diana Rigg

⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕

⁕ 6TH HOUSE: The sexy competent librarians 👀. Details makes the difference, and these natives know it way too well. "Ohhh that book fell on the ground could you please hand it to me?" *proceed to put a little note in your hand* "ohh thank you, i guess this must be a book i'll have to read, the universe has spoken 👀". Skilled individuals and humble about it. They work hard behind the scenes to create a perfect plan to seduce you, it even shows on their face, like did you sleep? But well, those dark circles look so hot on them it's crazy, you can't resist their appeal. Naturally good at picking up what people needs. They make even the everyday tasks so worth it when it comes to spend time with them. They could seduce you by giving you a pet as a meaningful gift. You'll feel special because they started playing their plan by showing you they have high standards. And who wouldn't want to be picked by someone picky?

⁕ 💥 HOW TO MAKE THEM FAIL THEIR PLAN: Show them it's ok to be imperfect. Show them that their plan don't need to be so detailed, they already got you by showing their efforts. They attach their worth to how capable they are, and refuse to believe they're worthy as only human being. If you let them know with empathy that value is only a matter of perspectives and that in your perspective they're already genuinely perfect in all their imperfections they'll feel so appreciated that the detailed plan they built can only unfold further without it making them even feel like they're putting efforts.

⁕ Celebrities examples of Sirene in 6H: Lana Del Rey, Timothee Chalamet, Michael Jackson, Natalia Dyer, Chelo Alonso, Claudia Cardinale

⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕

⁕ 7TH HOUSE: *sweet wedding music playing*... oh shoot, why are you wearing that suit/wedding dress?... ohh right, they seduced you to get married to them right away to steal your fourtune 😏. No but really, these natives makes people want to put a ring on their finger just after a singe conversation. The favourite of the masses. They're liked by everyone, because they are impeccable at the art of changing masks during conversations. Could even easily grasp the heart of their enemies. Their poise, their composure and their balance in themselves makes people think they're the perfect wife/husband material. Flawless fashion and perfect taste in clothing added to a, now rare, common sense inspire a sense of lost glamour that invade other people's minds and fantasies. Their gentle movements and nice actions strike to win other people's daydreams to be able to win their own dream life.

⁕ 💥 HOW TO MAKE THEM FAIL THEIR PLAN: Show them you catch the real them in between changing masks. They'd vacillate and lose that control a bit, if you show that you also are confident in your skin and you aren't afraid to show your authentic self in public,even if this means having haters, you'd make them want to lose their kept and to just break themselves free from any expectations to live life discovering who they truly are inside and not who they should be to respect society's standards.

⁕ Celebrities examples of Sirene in 7H: Audrey Hepburn, Greta Garbo, Zendaya, Demi Moore, Kristen Stewart

⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕

⁕ 8TH HOUSE: Intoxicating nymphs with a soft spot for inheritance. They're black widows standing at the funeral of their poor husband number "i lost the count" (well, they could easily marry a Count and "lose" him from death to "natural causes" 🥺). These natives will seduce you privately, they'll wrap you up in their fog and you won't be able to see anything else but them with no way to escape their bubble. They'll get you obsessed and addicted, poisoning you with their charisma and their deep meaningful words, making you feel special. They know how to use human psychology to their advantage, some of them might even seduce you with sex, or might seduce you to get sex with them.(These people feel extremely lonely even if they hide it under a mask of perfect self control , they crave that intimate deep connection that they never or rarely experience where they can show their vulnerabilities without getting judged.)

⁕ 💥 HOW TO MAKE THEM FAIL THEIR PLAN: Show them stability in yourself and your element to create a space that will make them feel safe to open up. Let them feel all the sensations they closed themselves up to, and once you see them getting comfortable,make them feel themselves in all their power by triggering their senses. Make them feel heard by sharing your insecurities and listen to theirs with compassion and genuine understanding. They'll be yours forever.

⁕ Celebrities examples of Sirene in 8H: Shakira, Uma Thurman, Ursula Andress, Priyanka Chopra, Billie Eilish, Cate Blanchett

⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕

⁕ 9TH HOUSE: Exotic and ethereal beings that will seduce you with their spirituality and higher knowledge. They like to present themselves as gods/goddesses (put on that white shapeless drape and make it looks expensive and like they've been living in it for ages *sexy wise*🔮). They'll make you fall for their trap by triggering your mind and sense of self, trip you by making you believe there's something greater than you, let you believe they are IT. They'll use their personal philosophies to brainwash you. Could seduce you by challenging/changing your faith/religion. Their foreign appeal attracts people in, and with that contagious laugh...you won't feel any symptoms, instead it'll feel like you're being transported to the Temple of the Gods, enjoying your wine, letting yourself be cradled in the arms of Bacchus. Enjoy the voyage of the mind, but not by too much or you'll never find your way back home...

⁕ 💥 HOW TO MAKE THEM FAIL THEIR PLAN: Show them you can't see what they want you to see. Make them doubt their blind faith by picking up details they've forgot about, important details that would break the higher purpose and sense of their plan. If you give them even a little existential crisis, they'll feel lost and will follow you to have a little bit of certainty to bear the huge uncertainty.

⁕ Celebrities examples of Sirene in 9H: Sharon Stone, Elle Fanning, Gina Lollobrigida

⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕

⁕ 10TH HOUSE: Bosses of sensuality. Their intensely demanding and confident aura traps everyone in making them wanting to crawl at these natives feet to receive just a pinch of their attention. They take responsibility, they inspire everyone around them with their work ethic and their serious approach. No mistakes allowed, they're the epitome of a perfectly stable and successful individual. Bearer of way too much attention, they try to focus on their path, and this only drives people crazier. They're not particularly flirty natives, but their availability to others makes them irresistible beings people feel entitled to project their insecurities onto. In case of highly sexual beings, people with this placement could seduce you at work, or by showing their work and how good they are at it.

⁕ 💥 HOW TO MAKE THEM FAIL THEIR PLAN: Show them how to embrace their emotional side. They only open the doors to hear other's problems, forgetting they have emotions that scream the needs to be expressed too . They're always cold and composed to mantain their public persona, feeding the weight of that outer burden with mature temper, forgetting their inner joyful child.

⁕ Celebrities examples of Sirene 10H: Monica Bellucci, Sophia Loren, Dakota Johnson, Winona Ryder

⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕

⁕ 11TH HOUSE: Driiiiing!...Hello?... *speaks in native alien language*...yeah, i didn't understand either. What's on these natives minds? Their unpredictable actions catch everyone off guard. But then they get on your mind and you wonder why. I told you, they called it. They have so many connections they'd get to you in 0.0001 seconds, yeah, 3H natives are fast, but these natives's brain technology is faster. They strike alone, anonimously, and ironically they take the hard and impossible route even when they could easily use their crowd of submissive sheeps. But they're the black sheep, like Batman, they don't fit in, Bruce Wayne is just another insignificant rock in the pile of the universe. But Batman, he can make a difference, he's dark, he's hot and he won't listen to your boss. Their rebellious aura is irresistible. But i know more, so take my call: 🎵 <Hello from the other siiiiiiide... ⬇

⁕ 💥 HOW TO MAKE THEM FAIL THEIR PLAN: ... at least i can say that i've trieeed>🎵 . No but seriously, these natives aren't so easy to get. They don't care about the fact they're seducing people most of the times, they let them be and focus on the bigger reason on why they're doing the stuff they do. You'll have to remind them they're a special person in their normal boring everyday clothes too. Bruce Wayne isn't just a simple sheep in the crowd, he is a phenomenal individual that can have as much power as Batman. Tell them they need to live for themselves, not for others.

⁕ Celebrities examples of Sirene 11H: Scarlett Johansson, Penelope Cruz, Nicole Kidman, Meryl Streep, Brigitte Bardot

⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕

⁕ 12TH HOUSE: If dreams could kill, then you'd meet a Sirene in 12H. They're the enigma, the fantasy everyone want to get lost into. They understand life can be boring and monotonous, and people are so stressed out by It that they seduce their prey offering them a ticket to the Land of wonders. But their prey doesn't know that this ticket has a hidden price, much like in Squid Game, the premise of the game is too good to be true. Lies, unknown truths, a harsher reality these people will soon face if they ever wake up after falling in their trap. Sirene in 12H natives could play with their prey abusing substances on them, making them drinking way too much to the point of not realizing who they are anymore. They make you wander in your confusion. Most of their preys will come back or even never leave that deadly sweet arena because the thrill feels heavenly and once you see you can't forget.

⁕ 💥 HOW TO MAKE THEM FAIL THEIR PLAN: Show them reality is not that bad. Beauty is found in the mundane, because life is meaningful but only if you make it so. Choices are important and can forge one's path, and by not making choices you inevitably set youself up for failure and delusions. Dreams don't last forever and are not sustainable to have in the long run, besides, the most vivid dreams you remember are often your worst nightmares.

⁕ Celebrities examples of Sirene 12H: Aishwarya Rai, Megan Fox, Ingrid Bergman, Charlize Theron, Catherine Zeta-Jones, Kate Winslet

⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕⁓⁕

Congrats! You've reached the end of the post! 🌸

✨ Did you like it? ✨

I hope it kept you entartained, added a pinch of knowledge and maybe even made you smile a bit 🥰

Let me know in the comments if you resonated with your placement ✨

If you're curious to know how Sirene in the signs would manifest in your chart i made an entire post on it, click here to read it!

Wish you a fantastic day!

(like the one the mermaids from Neverland are having ⬇)

Yours,

Linnie 🦋

[ohmytyong]

spin the bottle

part of @rrxnjun 's "the crush chronicles" collab

PAIRING: childhood friend!donghyuck x female!reader (side pairing: friend!yangyang x friend!karina)

GENRE: college au, childhood friends to lovers, fluff, slightly angsty, coming-of-age, mc and hyuck grow apart and then become friends (or lovers!!) again, best friend!yangyang, best friend!karina, xiaojun and giselle are mentioned a couple times

WARNINGS: mentions of food, explicit language, alcohol consumption, mentions and use of drugs, smoking, vomiting, use of pet names (barely lol), probably a bit too fluffy at the end, the side couple is lowkey more interesting than the main couple (oops), super cliché plot line, not proofread (please let me know if i missed anything)

WC: 21,2 k (oops lol)

‣[PLAYLIST]: amusement park by baekhyun, can i call you tonight? by dayglow, on the way by nct dream, fallingforyou by the 1975

SUMMARY: you knew you loved lee donghyuck ever since you met him, when the two of you were little kids. you had become best friends and were practically inseparable. until one day, donghyuck had to leave town and he also had to leave you. however, your feelings for him only grew stronger and stronger and you knew you had to confess to him when you met him again in college. but all this time, you kept suppressing them and you were always left wondering one thing; if he ever loved you back.

A/N: wow i can't believe it's finally here!! i've spent months working on this fic and i can say i'm very proud for actually finishing it. thank you everyone for being excited for it and especially thanks to @rrxnjun and the collab call for giving me the basis for developing this idea <3 enjoy reading this fic and don't forget to give me feedback, it helps me a lot<33

read on wattpad / ao3

You were five years old when you first fell in love. Or at least you thought you did. You could never know what falling in love meant at such a young age. But that’s how you want to describe it. Because your feelings for him could not be compared to how you felt about other boys. He could not be compared to other boys. That’s why you fell in love with him. But he didn’t fall in love with you. Or if he did, he never showed it.

Loud cheerful screams were the sound echoing in your ears, mixed with the soothing dreamy music coming from the merry-go-round ahead of you. The gate in front of you seemed ginormous in comparison to your small body. Rainbow fairy lights were climbing up the sides of the gate, confetti glued in between each one of them. White balloons were tied to the top and bottom corners of the pillars, leading up to the bright red and gold sign at the top which read ‘Welcome to Dreamland’.

Your eyes were roaming around the place, looking up to the sky and then left and right to the amusement park your mum took you. Soft awes and chuckles left your lips every time you spotted something new. Everything seemed magical in your eyes, the music and the colors transporting your little brain to different dimensions; this was indeed dreamland.

You stopped in front of the merry-go-round and inspected it. The blue, gold and white horses were moving up and down to the rhythm of the music, kids were riding them with cheerful smiles on their faces. You wanted to go there too. You looked at your mother to ask her to get on the merry-go-round. You opened your mouth when-

“Y/n! Y/n!” a cheery voice was calling your name. You stopped to look towards the direction of the sound, only to spot your best friend. “Yangyang!”

You let go of your mother’s hand and sprinted towards him, capturing him into a tight hug. “Wanna go to the horses?” you asked him eagerly.

“Yes! Let’s go” he agreed and your mothers helped you get on the merry-go-round. After all, it was your favorite.

You and Yangyang went on almost every ride of the amusement park. You loved bumper cars, you went on the ferris wheel with your mothers and went on almost twenty rounds on the kids’ roller coaster. You even tried to catch a teddy bear at the claw machines, but you couldn’t get the chance to do so.

After hours of trying all of the amusement park rides, your little stomach started growling and the smell of food everywhere around you only triggered your hunger more. You passed by the food canteens, smelling and taking in all the delicious scents. "What should I choose?" you thought. Just then, you spotted a stand with something strange looking; it was multi-colored fluff on sticks. Cotton candy. You had never seen it before, so you had to try it.

“Mum! I want to try this! It looks like clouds! I want the pink one!”

Your mum agreed and bought you and Yangyang one stick of cotton candy each, while his mum bought you drinks.

You went over to the tables to sit and eat your cotton candy. You sat down on a chair and took a bite. You didn’t know what to expect, but the sugary flavor definitely met those expectations.

“Wow, it tastes so pink! And it feels like the clouds! It's so fluffy!” your mother laughed at your excitement and agreed.

Yangyang was eating his cotton candy too, but he suddenly grabbed your hand and dragged you down the chair. “Let’s go for a walk. Mum, can we go for a walk?” he turned to ask his mother.

His mum shrugged. “Okay, but not too far from here, I want to see you” she said and we left, grinning.

Obviously, you didn’t listen to her. You liked the freedom you had at that moment, so you went strolling through the entire amusement park.

You and Yangyang were holding each other’s hand so that neither of you run away and got lost. Your other hands were holding the cotton candy. You felt so small among the other people and the huge amusement park rides, but you liked it. You felt at ease.

Yangyang let go of your hand and started skipped in front of you. “In the count of three I’ll start running and you will chase after me to catch me!” he said leaving you still.

“No! Yangyang, I can’t run fast!”

Yangyang didn’t listen to you. He smirked instead and started counting. “One, Two. Three!”

“Wait!” you yelled, but he had already run away.

You sighed and started running through the crowd too. You could still spot him in between other people, but you couldn’t run that fast and stumbled when taking longer steps.

Yangyang stopped and turned back to look at you. He smiled and yelled. “Come on, you’re almost there!” and resumed running.

You were breathing heavily, your feet were feeling sore, and you couldn’t move with ease through the crowd. You took a deep breath and gathered all your energy to run as fast as you could. Your only focus was to catch your friend Yangyang, who was now walking backwards looking at you with a smug expression. You had blocked out your surroundings entirely and didn’t notice that another boy was running too. And he was running towards your direction.

Yangyang was now standing, waiting for you to catch him. “I got you!” you shouted before you let out a scream and fell on the ground. The other boy was running fast too, which ended in him bumping into you. Both of you and the other boy fell down on your butts, the cotton candy you were holding was now smashed and dropped on the ground too.

“No! My fluff!” you frowned, tears already forming in the corners of your eyes.

Yangyang was shocked to see you fall. He came over to you to help you get up, smoothening your dress. “Are you okay Y/n? I’m sorry, I didn’t want to get you hurt” he was the one that sounded more hurt.

“It’s okay Yangyang” you reassured him. “But my fluff fell too! I wanted to eat it!” you whined.

Yangyang hugged you. “Don’t worry, we’ll buy a new one."

The other boy steadily stood up by himself. “I’m sorry, I was running too. I didn’t see you.” The boy said, his head lowered.

Neither you or Yangyang responded, so he lifted his head slowly to look at you. “I can buy you cotton candy if you’d like. Sorry” he apologized again.

But you couldn’t speak now either. He looked at you with sorrow eyes, plump lips forming a pout. You took a moment to really look at him. His skin was darker than yours, he was slightly taller than you, his bowl-cut covered his eyebrows, moles on his cheek and neck.

You didn’t know why, but you felt your stomach clench. You cleared your throat and spoke. “Don’t be sorry, I was running too.”

The boy nodded. “My name is Donghyuck. What’s yours?” he asked.

“I’m Y/n and this is my friend Yangyang” you pointed at your friend beside you and he flashed a bright smile to the other boy, Donghyuck.

Donghyuck smiled too and you felt your stomach clench again. “Do you guys want to be friends?” he asked and both you and Yangyang nodded. “Yes let’s be friends! Do you wanna go ride the bumper cars?” Yangyang said and grabbed both yours and Donghyuck's hands.

That’s the first memory you had of him. The first time you saw him, and the first time you've ever felt this weird clenching feeling in your stomach. This was a memory you would always cherish and always remember dearly. But you weren't really sure if he held this memory as close to his heart as you did.

Beep. Pause. Beep

Why isn’t he picking up the phone? You had called Yangyang three times already. Where is he?

You put your phone in your pocket and grabbed the books you needed for your next class from your locker. As you locked it, an arm linked with yours and dragged you to the corridor.

“Are you ready for this new semester? I heard new students transferred to our department, they might be hot” your best friend Jimin was smirking, wiggling her eyebrows.

“Yeah they might be, but I have a class now and Yangyang isn’t here, I can’t cover up for him on the first day!” you complained.

“Oh come on Y/n, you know how he is. He probably slept in, he’ll be here, don’t worry” she said and you nodded.

You were walking towards your class, greeting a few of your old colleagues on the way. It was your third year of college already, but it still felt like your first day.

You and Jimin parted ways and went to your respective classes. You agreed to meet up later for coffee and lunch, after classes ended.

The amphitheater was almost full; you managed to spot an empty seat at the back of the room and hurried to sit there before someone else took that seat.

You sat down and placed the books on top of the desk. You checked your phone again and saw that Yangyang had now texted you.

[Yangles]

slept in. don’t save me a seat

ttyl :)

Typical Yangyang. You sighed and put your phone aside as the lecture was about to start.

For the next two hours, you couldn’t concentrate on the lecture because of the group of friends chatting behind you. If you were honest, their conversation was a lot more interesting than the lecture.

The girls behind you kept talking about the new students at the computer engineering department. You heard comments such as “oh he is so hot” and “they looked at me and winked”. Oh Jimin is gonna love the tea.

The lecture finally ended and you headed towards the coffee shop in which Jimin asked you to meet her. You sent her a text to let her know you’re on your way. As you were typing the text, suddenly an arm slung around your shoulder. So you let out a loud-ass scream. 

“Guess who’s here!” Yangyang exclaimed, a wide grin plastered across his face, eyes bright, his loud voice a bit too close to your ear. If you ever become deaf, it’s all his fault.

“Oh good morning to you too Yangyang, I’m fine thanks and you?” you said ironically and he rolled his eyes at your comment.

“Cut the ironies bestie, I met Donghyuck earlier” he said and your feet froze and stayed glued right where you were standing.

But you haven’t seen him in years. He moved out of town when you were fifteen, right before high school, because his parents found a better job. He had promised both you and Yangyang that he would call and maybe even visit you whenever he could. And he kept his promise for a while, but after things got tougher with school, his phone calls and occasional visits stopped.

Your stomach clenched. You gulped and removed Yangyang’s arm from your shoulder. “what do you mean Donghyuck is here?”

“I mean that Donghyuck is here” he said, rolling his eyes again, but his tone was serious. “He transferred to the computer engineering department. I came across him on campus and met his friends too. Real cool guys. He asked me about you too.”

“He did?” you regret speaking, because you didn’t expect your voice to come out that shaky.

“Um yeah, why wouldn’t he? He wants us to meet and hang out, just like the good old days. Are you free now?” 

“No, I’m actually meeting Jimin for coffee now. I was texting her before you scared the shit out of me” you said.

Yangyang laughed. “Okay, I’ll see you later then. I’ll tell Hyuck you said hi” he squeezed your cheek and left.

But you were still standing frozen, trying to comprehend what Yangyang just told you. Donghyuck is back. He is back and you couldn’t wait to see him again. So he does remember you. There must be a reason why he didn’t contact you all these years. People’s lives change, right? Does he still look as pretty as he did back then? Does he still care about you as he did back then? All these questions started forming one after the other in your head, but you couldn’t distract yourself from the clenching feeling in your stomach. In fact, these exact questions were to blame for causing you this feeling. 

You were ten years old when you fell in love again. Not that you ever fell out of love. But at least now you were sure about your feelings. It wasn’t something you had made up; it was rather a confirmation that you had loved him ever since the day you saw him.

You had went to the park with Yangyang and Donghyuck. The three of you decided to do sports in the park; Yangyang took his skateboard with him and Yangyang took his bike. You, however, didn’t take anything with you; you didn’t know how to skate and you certainly didn’t know how to ride a bike. You just wanted to tag along because you had fun spending time with your friends.

But Donghyuck had offered to help you learn how to ride a bike. Yangyang bursted out laughing so hard when Donghyuck said that. “I tried to teach her how to skate once and let me tell you, I wouldn’t even think about teaching her how to ride a bike” Yangyang said.

Yangyang always found his way to make fun of you. He didn’t do it in order to be mean; it was anything but that. He liked teasing you because you would get annoyed and then he would apologize because he felt bad. “I didn’t mean it Y/n” he would say. “I know” you always responded.

But that day Donghyuck was present in this conversation. What you didn’t expect was for him to stand up for you. “Well, in her defense Yangyang” he started “skating is too hard. It needs patience both by the skater and the student. The bike is a bit easier to handle. I think Y/n can do it”.

Every time Donghyuck spoke about you, your stomach clenched. You didn’t know what it was about him that made you feel this way. Was it his eyes? His smile? His honey skin? His soft voice? His kindness and humor? The way he treated you? You didn’t know.

Yangyang agreed with Donghyuck. “You’re right, I didn’t mean what I said. Just so you know. I think you can do this Y/n” he said, his smile fading.

“Don’t apologize Yangles, I know you didn’t mean it” you said and his signature grin appeared on his face again.

You eventually learned how to ride a bike. Donghyuck helped you every time; he taught you how to keep your balance, held you every time you were about to fall and did it every day until you were finally able to do it on your own.

One day he asked you to go to the park to ride your bikes together. Yangyang said he couldn’t come because he felt sick. So it was just you and Donghyuck.

You always felt such comfort with him. He reminded you of a warm summer day in nature. His pure gaze felt like the sun rays hitting your skin, his plump lips seemed to be as soft as the cotton fields, his laugh livelier than the chirping birds. He was comfort himself.

That day the two of you went biking, you couldn’t help but smile at the way you felt. You felt free, independent, powerful. The world surrounding you was in a haze, the only sight you could see was him, the only sound you could hear was his voice.

But sometimes it felt nice not hearing his voice. It meant that he was at peace, and you were too. You had left your bikes standing against a tree and the two of you sat down on the grassy ground to just stare at the sunset. You both loved the sunset.

Donghyuck’s arm was resting on your lower back, his head leaning towards yours, which was resting on his shoulder. Sometimes, when you sat in a position like this, you would try to match your breathing with his. If you were to be honest, you would admit that it was quite hard.

Donghyuck’s gaze was set on the colorful sea of clouds ahead of him, You did the same. He didn’t turn to look at you when he spoke up. “You know, Y/n, at moments like this, I realise how much I enjoy spending time with you. You are truly the best friend I could ever have. I would never leave you, okay?”

The words he uttered at this exact moment confirmed that you sure loved him. More than just a friend. But you could never open up to him about this. He could never know. Not when he wasn’t feeling the same. Not when he didn’t keep his promise.

Jimin was sitting at a coffee table near the window, sipping from a white plastic cup while texting on her phone. You skipped towards her and sat down on the chair opposite from hers. “Donghyuck is here”.

She put down both her cup and her phone and looked at you with furrowed eyebrows. “What? Don’t tell me he’s one of the transfer students” she said. 

“Well, apparently he is” you said. “Yangyang told me. They’ve already met. Plus, he asked about me”.

Jimin’s bottom lip dropped down to her jaw. “What?” she said again. “Okay, when are we meeting him? I need to have a word with him”.

You laughed at her reaction. “Stop it Jimin, I’m over him now. It’s been years since I had a crush on him.” you said.

“I don’t believe you. You can’t trick me with that. I won’t fall for it.” she said, her tone serious. “I know you dated and all, but you always compared everyone to Donghyuck. You expect me to believe that you moved on?”

You rolled your eyes and sighed. “Whatever” you said.

The two of you paused for a moment before Jimin spoke up. “Do you think he got even hotter?”

You laughed at her comment and playfully slapped her forearm. “Stop it Jimin!”. She was now laughing too. “I don’t know, okay? He might be.” you said.

“Do you want to see him?” Jimin asked you and your eyes shifted down to your lap.

You seriously didn’t know. A part of you wanted to see him, talk to him, hug him and feel him again, ask him about his life and interests, spend time with him. But a part of you was scared; scared that if you saw him, you would fall in love with him again.

“My guess is that you do. Come on, I missed him a bit too” Jimin said and you chuckled. “Now, how about we get you some coffee and you tell me about your day, hm?” Jimin asked and you nodded in agreement.

The next day Yangyang insisted on picking you up from your dorm and driving you to your classes. He felt bad he missed the first day of the semester so he decided to make up for standing you up by driving you to class. You grabbed your phone to text him and let him know that you were ready but he beat you to it. He was already parked outside the dorm complex waiting for you in his car.

You opened the door from the passenger’s side and got inside the car. “Hey” you greeted him and he did the same, flashing you his signature wide grin.

“Don’t make plans for later. We’re going out tonight. You, me and Donghyuck” he said after he turned on the engine.

 The mention of this specific name took you aback. You muttered a small “okay” and you hoped he heard you the first time so you wouldn’t have to repeat it. “Should I tell Jimin to tag along? She said she would like to hang out all together too” you asked.

Yangyang shrugged. “Yeah sure, I haven’t seen her in a while. Hyuck would love to see her too” he said.

You thanked him for agreeing to invite Jimin and smiled at him. But you couldn’t ignore the clenching feeling that appeared again in your stomach.

Your thoughts carried you away and you didn’t realize you had already arrived at campus. Yangyang parked the car and both of you exited it. You exchanged a short conversation of “see you later” and “text me for any news” and went to your respective classes.

The day went by in a flash. It was already afternoon and you were in your dorm with Jimin, your closet wide open, clothes scattered all over the bed.

You let out a frustrated sigh. “I officially don’t have any clothes” you whined.

“No, you do,” Jimin said, “you’re just nervous. And I don’t even know the reason why, I thought you were over Donghyuck, right?”

“Jimin please, you’re making this even harder!” you whined again.

Jimin got up from the chair and stood in front of your closet. She searched through the racks and the drawers for a while until she stopped and put an outfit on your bed. “Here,” she said, “get dressed. And do it quickly. We’re gonna be late”.

You complied and took the clothes to get dressed. It’s just a meet up with old friends. Nothing to be stressed about. You didn’t have a crush on Donghyuck anymore either. You were probably nervous, or rather excited, because you hadn’t seen him in a long time. Yeah, that’s probably why.

You were supposed to meet Yangyang and Donghyuck at the local diner. Yangyang promised to be there earlier so that you and Jimin wouldn’t have to be the ones to wait for them. You weren’t sure whether you should believe him or not; every time he promises to be early, there’s only gonna appear something on his way to make him late.

Jimin offered to drive the two of you to the diner that you were supposed to meet your friends at. You’ve been to this diner before, you’re going out with your best friends, just a normal night out. But why is your heart beating so hard? Why does it feel like it’s about to rip your chest apart and fly out of your body?

Jimin parked the car in the diner’s parking lot. You spotted Yangyang’s car in the parking lot too, two figures standing beside it. It must be them. It must be him.

“Hello? Are you listening to me?” Jimin waved her hand in front of your face and you quickly snapped out of your thoughts. “I see them, let’s go” she said and exited the car.

You imitate her movements and get out of the car too. Jimin noticed your uneasiness, so she linked her arm with yours and walked with you towards the boys.

Yangyang and Donghyuck seemed to have a conversation about something and didn’t realize you were right there, standing in front of them. “We’re here” Jimin spoke up and the two boys turned their bodies to look at us.

Your gaze immediately fell on the boy that made your heart beat and break at the same time. Black leather jacket hanging from his shoulders, black skinny jeans and boots covering his long legs, comma-styled black hair exposing his forehead. You locked eyes with him, his chocolate ones piercing through yours, plump lips sliding upwards to a wide smile. You swear you saw sparkles in his eyes for a second. Only your heart knew the answer.

“Y/n” Donghyuck breathed out and you returned his smile, before you threw yourself on him and embraced him tightly.

He started laughing. “I missed you so much” he said in your ear and you were thankful he wasn’t able to see your face because your cheeks were almost on fire. “Cute, but I wish I could say the same bitch-ass” you laughed too.

“Oh shut up, you haven’t seen me in years and this is the treatment I get?”.Of course he clapped back. Typical Donghyuck. And right there and then, it felt as if not a single day had passed.

You hugged him tightly. You forgot how comfortable he felt. He had rested his chin in the crook of your neck and you stood on the tips of your toes to do the same. He had definitely grown a bit taller since the last time you saw him. You took a moment to remember his scent, to feel his touch, to hear his voice. And then the clenching feeling was there again.

Yangyang cleared his throat. “Um, we’re here too, you know” he trailed off. You and Donghyuck broke the hug and Donghyuck motioned Yangyang and Jimin to join you in a group hug. Your cheekbones hurt because you were smiling so hard. Your heart fluttered. You were happy.

Yangyang was the first one to break off the hug because he started whining and said he was hungry, so he went inside the diner and invited us in. Donghyuck followed shortly after him, leaving you and Jimin behind. Jimin turned at you and mouthed “girl he’s so hot” and went inside the diner. Typical Jimin, you thought.

Time seemed to have stopped and felt like you were trapped in a loop. Spending time with your favorite people, laughing, talking, reminiscing about the past while making plans for the future. You only stopped the conversations when you had to take a bite from your food or take a sip from your drink. Yangyang didn’t seem to be bothered by that though. 

“So,” Donghyuck started and you shifted your gaze to your drink “are you still dating that guy Y/n?”

Oh he was talking to you. You looked up at him, confused. “Who? Dejun? Well, no, we broke up, like, so long ago” you said.

“Yeah he yeeted his way out to be a model in China or something, honestly who even cares? I almost forgot about him” Yangyang said after he emptied his glass of beer.

Donghyuck chuckled at Yangyang’s remark and went back to eating his food. Jimin kicked you under the table and when you looked at her side, she was smirking.

“Well Yangyang, how about you tell us about your relationship, hm?” you asked him and he choked on his food. He started coughing and Donghyuck patted him on his back to help him breathe.

“Let's not talk about it bestie, okay? I know I fucked up” he said after he caught his breath.

“Why what happened? Donghyuck asked, intrigued.

Jimin was the one who spoke this time. “He's supposed to be dating this girl but he never texts her, calls her or takes her out. Basically he never wants to spend time with her. I seriously don’t know why she hasn’t broken up with him yet”.

Yangyang lowered his eyes. “It’s not like I don’t wanna see her,” he muttered, “but I may or may not have lost feelings and I kinda don’t know how to tell her”.

“Maybe if you weren’t such a coward you would confront her and stop playing with her. It’s that easy you know. Whether you love or don’t love someone anymore, you should tell them before it’s too late” you told him.

“Sounds brave coming from you, Y/n” his response caught you off guard. You threw a piercing glare at him and before you opened your mouth to speak, Jimin spoke over you. “Maybe we should change the topic, what do you think?” she said.

You and Yangyang exchanged a look and focused your attention on your food. Donghyuck chuckled at the interaction between you and your best friend, but he didn’t say anything. 

The rest of the night went on smoothly and you soon forgot about the tension between you and Yangyang from earlier. He was right though. You should consider your own advice sometimes. Why can’t you tell Donghyuck you like him? Why didn’t you tell him when you had the chance to do so? Your feelings for him began to resurface and it was just the first time you saw him after years. You couldn’t let yourself make the same mistake again.

The entire night you and Donghyuck kept throwing hidden glances at each other. You caught him staring at you multiple times and if you were honest with yourself, you did stare at him too. You couldn’t ignore the fact that he looked beautiful. He had always been beautiful.

Your mind, however, was focused on something else, something you wanted to have an answer to. Why did he stop reaching out for you when he left? You needed to know the reason why. He must have had a reason. You tried to push this thought aside and allowed yourself to have a good time. I’ll ask him another time, you thought.

You were fifteen years old when you had your first kiss. And it was none other than Lee Donghyuck himself who stole it from you. Part of you believed that the reason you were so attached to him even now was because of that day; he gave you your first kiss. But a part of you knew that the kiss was the incident that tied everything together.

Donghyuck announced one day that the company his parents worked in was moving their main offices to a different town, so they had to move away from this place. The same day, you announced to your friend Jimin that you had your first heartbreak. Of course you were going to miss him. A lot. Yangyang was sad too that day. Jimin didn’t know him well enough, but she still felt sad when Donghyuck told you all.

The day before Donghyuck and his family would move away, Yangyang had an idea; to throw a goodbye party for Donghyuck. Donghyuck disagreed and said that a normal hangout with all of us would be just fine, but Yangyang insisted on throwing a party at his place. It will still be just the four of us but a little bit fancier, he had said.

So eventually everyone agreed. The previous day, you and Yangyang went to the shops to buy snacks and some decorations. You were walking around the convenience store aisles when Yangyang finally admitted to his ulterior motives.

“So, Y/n, here’s what we’re gonna do. For the party. I think we should play games but in a more adult way, if you know what I mean” he smirked and wiggled his eyebrows.

You looked at him confused and urged him to continue. “So we’ll play spin the bottle. And before you protest, no we’re not gonna drink anything with alcohol in it because we’re gonna get caught, but it’s gonna be a good excuse for me to kiss Jimin and for you to kiss Donghyuck”.

You stopped walking with a bag of chips in your hands and turned to him. “Are you out of your mind? This cannot happen, ever!” you whisper-shouted at him.

“Oh come on Y/n, don’t be such a party pooper. We both win in the end so what’s the matter?” he whined.

You thought for a few seconds. “They might be uncomfortable and turn down your offer. We want to have fun, remember? Plus, I don’t think Jimin likes you back and Donghyuck certainly doesn’t like me back either” you said and put that bag of chips you were holding into the shopping cart.

“Okay, Jimin might not like me back but I am completely, utterly, absolutely sure that Hyuck likes you” Yangyang said but you ignored him.

As if the odds were against you that day, Jimin and Donghyuck agreed on Yangyang’s suggestion. Jimin wasn’t that fond of the idea of playing spin the bottle at first, but eventually the boys convinced her and she said yes. You had no other choice but to agree too.

You wanted to kiss Donghyuck. You really did. But not in a forced scenario and definitely not in front of Yangyang. You wouldn’t bear his annoying ass teasing you about it for the rest of your life. But this could be my chance to finally confess to him, you thought. But even if you did, nothing would change. He would still leave town the next morning.

Yangyang grabbed the glass of cola you emptied earlier and put it on the ground. You gathered up sitting on the ground too. You looked at Jimin and she smiled at you. “Don’t think about it too much Y/n, it’s just a game”. It wasn’t just a game to you.

Yangyang was the first one to spin the bottle. The empty cola bottle spun for a few seconds, four sets of eyes staring at it with laser rays coming out of them. The bottle started gradually spinning less quickly, until it took three, two, one seconds before it stopped and became still; the top part of the bottle was pointing at Jimin and the bottom part was at Yangyang’s side. “Oh my god Jimin has to kiss you bro” Donghyuck said, smiling.

“This game is bullshit, I don’t wanna do it” Jimin said and crossed her arms. Jimin’s words made Yangyang’s lips drop down to a frown.

“Come on Jimin, it’s just a game, you said it yourself” Donghyuck said. Jimin sighed and leaned towards Yangyang. “Fine, come here then you bitch” she said before she grabbed Yangyan’s jaw and kissed him on the lips. You and Donghyuck stayed still, watching them. Jimin only went in to peck Yangyang, but he went all the way in and kissed her properly. Jimin was quick to react and pulled away from him.. “Ew, don’t do that! We agreed on just a kiss not a full on makeout session. Jeez Yangyang” she said and sat back down at her side.

Yangyang tried to hide the sulk on his face. “I tried to taste your chapstick more, you bitch, but it turns out it tastes awful. What the fuck is this taste?” Yangyang said and wiped his lips with the back of his hand.

“It's vanilla” Jimin said. Yangyang loved vanilla.

The game continued for a couple of rounds and every single time, as if it was its fate, the bottle landed on Jimin and Yangyang. Jimin had already had enough with kissing Yangyang just once, so she suggested that they avoid the kissing part and just hug instead. This went on and on and on until the bottle spun again, going round and round and round until it stopped in three, two, one. But this time, the bottle’s ends were pointing towards two different directions. The bottom part on you, the top part on Donghyuck.

You gulped and looked at him. He seemed calm, relaxed. For him, it was just a game. Sitting there at that moment, looking right into his deep brown eyes, you regretted agreeing to play this game. And you made a mental note to slap Yangyang after all of this was over.

“Now this is getting interesting” Yangyang whispered just loud enough for you to hear him and went over to Jimin's side to sit beside her and watch.

Donghyuck licked his lips and leaned over towards you. You hoped he wouldn't be able to listen to the drumming sounds of your heart or see the embarrassingly vibrant red color on your cheeks. You just went along with it. It’s just a game, right?

Donghyuck was standing a bit too close to you, probably the closest the two of you have been physically. Or rather, the most intimate you’ve been together. He lowered his head to meet your eye level, and came closer to your face just enough so that his lips were grazing over your ear. “Don’t be nervous, it’s just for fun” he whispered to you. Suddenly, this wasn’t just fun anymore.

Donghyuck pulled away from your ear and was now staring deep into your eyes, his face almost attached to yours. He looked at you for a couple of seconds before he gave you a reassuring nod. You didn’t have the energy to say anything, so you gave him a nod too, signaling him that you were fine.

Before you could even process what was about to happen, Donghyuck leaned in and kissed you. Plump lips captured yours in a soft dancing motion, their taste perfectly resembling a mix of the pizza and cola he had earlier. Shock waves run throughout your entire body, as he moved his hand to the back of your neck to support you.

You allowed yourself to fall entirely into him, eyes closed and lips moving along the rhythm he created. A few seconds felt like hours, his homely yet unfamiliar touch making your stomach clench and your face heat up in love.

And then he stopped. Donghyuck pulled back and flashed the brightest smile you had ever seen painted on his beautiful face. He licked his lips and you laughed awkwardly, looking down at your lap to avoid his piercing gaze. Your heart was still beating rapidly. You could taste his lips on your lips, you could feel the touch of his hand in the back of your neck, you could hear the sound of his beating heart, you could sense his cool breath fanning your burning face. Donghyuck had stopped kissing you, but the sensation of his kiss was still present in your entire body. You just had your first kiss, and at the same time, you had your first kiss with Donghyuck.

“Gosh you were kissing for ages. Like, get a room, or something” Yangyang said and went back to sit on the side of the room he was previously sitting in. Jimin threw you a playful wink secretly from the boys. You knew what it meant. We need to talk later type of wink.

It was getting late and Donghyuck’s parents called him to go back home. He needed to leave sooner than the rest of you because he still hadn’t packed all of his things. You greeted him one last time before he walked out the door to leave.

As the door closed, you felt your heart sink down the deepest ocean, a piece of it shattering, tears welling up in the corners of your eyes, dryness in your throat. You missed him already. It had been just a couple of seconds since he walked out the door and your heart to go out that door with him too.

A tear streamed down your cheek.So this was it. A second tear followed shortly after the first one. Then another one. And another one. Soon enough a pool of tears was running down your face and it hadn’t occurred to you that you were going to miss him that much. 

But as if a lightning bolt struck you, you quickly wiped your tears with the palm of your hands, stormed out the door and ran after Donghyuck.

“Donghyuck!” you yelled and he stopped to look back at you. You were lucky he heard your voice, he hadn’t walked that far though, you were quick to react and follow after him, just so you could spend some more time with him. You and him.  “Do you mind if I walk you home?” you asked him and he nodded.

You skipped a bit so that you could walk beside him. You started walking alongside Donghyuck, taking a few seconds to catch your breath until it came back to its normal rate. “So, when are we gonna see you again?” you asked him. He left a low chuckle and shook his head.

“I honestly don’t know, Y/n” he said. Another piece of your heart shattered.

Donghyuck noticed your saddened expression and took your hand in his. "Hey, look at me” he said. You stopped and turned towards him, taking in the details of his face. His chocolate eyes were gleaming under the moonlight, the moles on his dark cheek reminded you of the stars in the night sky.

“I will not forget you. Ever. Always remember that. I will try my best to call you as much as I can, all of you. You guys are my best friends, I could never leave you. I don’t know how long I’ll be gone, it won’t be that easy for me to visit you often. but I promise to make up for all the time that we will lose. Especially for you. But I can’t be sure when that will be.”

A tear slipped down your cheek again and he wiped it away with his thumb. Why is he being like this all of a sudden?

Your voice wasn’t strong enough at that moment for you to speak, so you opened your arms to embrace him instead. And he hugged you back so tightly you thought your body would be merged with his. He buried his head at the crook of your neck and you stayed there for a while, feeling the presence of your bodies on each other. Not a single word was said, yet you felt so comfortable and safe in his arms.

That night you had helped him pack his things. You stayed in his room afterwards, talking, laughing, crying. God you were going to miss him. That day, you thought for the first time ever that maybe your feelings were reciprocated. But he said nothing about it. So you didn’t say anything either.

But you wanted to. It felt like all the words were stuck in your throat and there was something blocking them from coming out. I like you Donghyuck, I like you a lot. It was that easy. But for some reason, you couldn’t say it out loud. Maybe you didn’t want to. Maybe you were too scared of rejection. Or maybe you were afraid of losing a friend.

You and Donghyuck were sitting at the stairs of his porch, next to each other, facing the stars of the night sky. You didn’t want to go home. You couldn’t. You wanted to stay there longer, kiss him again, talk to him about anything and then kiss him again.

When you stood up to leave, he hugged you one last time, stroking your hair lightly. He spoke in a low voice in your ear. “I’ll be back. Don’t forget me”.

How could I ever forget you Donghyuck?

The day after you met Donghyuck at the diner, he texted you and asked to hang out later after your classes. You would be lying to yourself if you said that you didn’t screech like a schoolgirl the moment you saw his text message on your phone when you woke up.

Of course you agreed to meet him. At that moment, you didn’t feel nervous, at all,  but as time passed your stomach was clenching more and more.

Jimin wouldn’t stop nudging you about it the entire day. She wanted to meet up for lunch because she was dying to talk about this ever since you came back home last night. “The first thing he did in the morning was to ask you to hang out later? Yeah, sounds like a date to me” she said.

You rolled your eyes at her. “It's not a date, drop it. He just wants us to hang out, that’s it” you said.

“Are you sure that you want to just hang out though?” she asked you.

You thought for a second. “Well, no, but I won't try to do anything more than that” you said.

“Whatever,” Jimin said “you have to tell him sometime though, you know that right? And you also have to admit to yourself that you never really got over him, so now that he’s here you have to make your move. You had your chance once and you lost it. So don’t lose it again now”.

You sighed. “What if he doesn’t feel the same” you said.

“Who gives a fuck?” Jimin said “If he doesn’t feel the same, you will close this chapter and begin a new one. There are other fish in the sea too, you know”

Yeah but it’s not the same, you whispered to yourself. Jimin didn’t hear you.

As soon as you came back to your dorm, you went straight to searching through your closet for an outfit to wear later, when your phone chimed.

[Hyuck]

meet me at the park in about hour

[Hyuck]

bring your bike too

You were staring at your phone screen until it turned off. Oh he’s such a little bitch, you thought.

You put on comfortable clothes and running shoes, and decided to ride your bike on the way to the park. The sun was beginning to set; orange and pink hues painted the sky, a light chilly breeze combing through your hair. The park was still lively, little kids were playing with each other, old couples were going for walks, some students were studying under the trees.

You hadn’t been to the park since the day Donghyuck left. Yangyang wanted to go skating there from time to time, but every time he asked you to keep him company, you turned down his offer. Then, he started filling his time with dating girls and you started spending more time with Jimin, so the park wasn’t your go-to place to hang out anymore.

You saw Donghyuck leaning against a tree, foot resting on top of the bike’s pedal, same black leather jacket as the day before, a bucket hat hiding his pretty features. He was scrolling through his phone as you approached him.

“Hey” you said and his head shot up, turning off his phone and placing it in his pocket. “Y/n, hi” he said and smiled. You smiled back at him. He looked beautiful when he smiled.

“So, you still like the park, I see” you said. He nodded and hopped on his bike. “I do. So come on, let’s go for a ride. I think we have to catch up on a lot of things. And I promised to make up for all the time we lost. So, let’s go” he said and started riding his bike.

You followed shortly after him until you were now biking beside him. So he does remember his promise, you thought. You smiled to yourself and pushed your thoughts to the back of your mind. You wanted to enjoy your time with him, just like the old times.

You spent hours biking and talking about anything. Donghyuck told you stories from his high school years, the friends he met on the way, how he changed his college major and decided to come back here to study computer engineering.

“A part of me wanted this change because I missed this town, you know? I have so many memories here, I was kinda attached to this place. All I needed was a valid reason to come back, and I found one, so here I am.” he said.

You couldn’t help but bring the same questions to your mind, so you gathered all of your strength and asked him. “Then why didn’t you visit us at all? Or even call us back? You did at first and then you stopped. Why?”

Donghyuck pulled the breaks of his bike and rested his feet on the ground to stop the bike from moving. You mimicked his actions and stood there searching his features for an answer. He cleared his throat and turned to look at you. You couldn’t see his face clearly because the bucket hat was casting a shadow over his features.

“Honestly, I don’t really know. I didn’t want to stop contacting you, but I don’t know why I did it.” He paused for a few moments. He drew in a breath and started again. “You know what, I think I know, but I can’t tell you now. Maybe some other time, okay?” he said.

You were left confused, but decided not to question him any further. Instead, you nodded and smiled at him. He would tell you when he was ready to do so.

The sky was getting darker and darker and both your stomachs growled in hunger. Donghyuck suggested that you buy takeout and sit under at the park to stargaze. You left your bikes leaning against a random tree and put your jackets on the ground to sit on them.

The sky looked beautiful. The stars and the moon were shining brightly, contrasting with the pitch black background of the sky. Donghyuck was staring at the sky when he spoke up “I remember how much you liked watching the sky when you were younger. You were always watching the stars closely and we made bets on which one would fall first.”

You chuckled at the memory. “And you always lost. Every. Single. Time. Seriously, you have no intuition at all. You had won one time and bragged about it forever” you said and he laughed.

He turned his head to face you. He had taken off his hat too, his black hair was falling over his eyes. “You were just lucky all the other times. Don’t flatter yourself” he said.

You sat there and ate your food in silence. Comfortable silence. The only sound that was heard was the singing of the cicadas in the trees and occasionally your munching on the food.

Everything felt at ease again. You and Donghyuck, sitting beside each other, enjoying each other’s company, not having to utter a single word. You were smiling at yourself, it really felt as if not a single day had passed.

Donghyuck looked back at the sky and took a sip from his drink before he addressed you. “You really improved. Biking, I mean. I remember you were still struggling when I left” he said.

“Thanks, I still rode my bike to school so that I could get used to it more. Thank you for teaching me by the way. I don’t think I ever thanked you properly” you said.

“It's no problem” he said and sipped from his drink again.

He opened his mouth to speak again, changing the subject now. “So, why did you break up with that guy? Dejun, was it?” he asked.

Why is he so curious about that? “Oh, there were many reasons actually. He wasn’t a bad guy, he was really cool and I liked him a lot. It’s just that we got kinda bored of each other, I guess? And he also graduated from high school a year earlier than me so then he had to go back to China for college.”

Donghyuck nodded. “I see” he paused and asked again. “How was he like?”

“Why do you even bother so much? He is old news now, anyway” you said. But now you were curious about Donghyuck too. “Tell me about you, did you date anyone in high school?”

You don’t know why but you got anxious waiting for his answer. He shrugged. “Yeah but nothing serious. Just casual things, you know?” he said and you hummed in agreement.

The night went on and you talked more. You and Donghyuck agreed to hang out at the park every day after your classes, like you used to. That’s what he suggested. You couldn’t say no; of course you wanted to spend time with him.

And that’s what you did. You grew closer again, maybe even closer than you used to be. You enjoyed biking and stargazing in the park a lot. It had become your thing; an activity that the two of you shared with each other, an excuse to get away from everyone and everything and make up for all the memories you could have had.

There were quite a few moments when you wanted to look Donghyuck in the eyes and tell him I like you dumbass. But every single time you backed away from doing it. You were too scared that these harmless words would end up destroying everything you had built with him.

So you waited. You waited for the right time to bring it up. You were having the time of your life alongside a dear person that you’ve loved and appreciated your entire life. You were not ready to take the risk and possibly lose him. So you never said a word. Because he didn’t say any words either.

“Why does Donghyuck keep asking me about Dejun? What is so interesting about him? If he wants to find out more about him, he should be the one to date him” the frustration in your voice made a couple of people turn their heads from the tables next to yours.

Jimin took a fork bite of her carrot cake. “Girl, you must be joking” she said, munching on the piece of cake. “He asks about him because, guess what, he is jealous! J-e-a-l-o-u-s. Got it? Why are you so stupid, gosh! The man has clearly fallen for you and you are so oblivious of it!”.

“I mean why would he be jealous? Dejun and I broke up so long ago” you muttered to yourself.

Jimin heard that and, obviously, she wouldn’t leave it at that. “This is what happens when you like someone. Donghyuck keeps asking you about your ex boyfriend because he wants to make sure he’s in the clear to make a move.”

You sighed. “Is this why you keep asking Yangyang if he broke up with his girlfriend? Look, Jimin, I love you, but I don’t think Hyuck likes me. As a friend, yes. But nothing more than that.”

Jimin gulped down a glass full of water. “Okay, whatever floats your boat, Y/n” she said and took another fork bite of her cake. “So, did Yangyang tell you? A frat guy he knows is hosting a party this weekend, wanna go?” she asked you.

“Come on Jiminie, you know I don’t really do parties” you whined.

Jimin rolled her eyes. “I wasn’t expecting a different answer. But we’re definitely going. There’s gonna be hot boys, good music and lots of alcohol. I heard Donghyuck is going too”.

“Well, he didn’t mention any party” you defended him. “He didn’t mention any party yet” Jimin corrected you. “He's gonna bring it up any second. I bet you can’t say no to him, you care too much about his feelings but you never care about mine” Jimin sulked.

You mentally slapped her only because you couldn’t bear to slap her for real. “I will go to the party because you want us to go, not because Donghyuck will supposedly be there. You know I always come along with you in everything. We come as a package, remember? Now, don’t sulk and eat your cake, we have to think about our outfits” you said. She was your best friend after all, it was the least you could do.

Jimin’s face lit up and her lips curved upwards, stretching all the way to her ears. Before she could open her mouth to speak, you cut her off. “But you have to promise me that you won’t get drunk, okay?” you said and lifted your pinky.

She linked her pinky finger with yours and nodded in agreement. “I don’t exactly promise it, but I’ll try my best” she said.

Donghyuck indeed mentioned the party later that day when you went out at the park with him. “I don’t really wanna go either Y/n, but all my friends are gonna be there. And now that you’re gonna be there too, I can’t be the only one missing out from all the fun” he said.

Donghyuck has had his fun share with parties during high school. He told you so one night at the park. He would sneak out the house and go to parties during weekends, but one night, or rather morning, he went home super drunk and threw up all over the front door rug. He claimed that this happened because of a dare his friends made him do and that he didn’t intend to drink as much as he did. After that, he avoided parties like the plague. It’s not that his parents never allowed him to go again; he could easily sneak out his window. He was smart enough to realize that parties were simply not good for him.

“I wanted to fit in with them, you know?” Donghyuck said “I got used to it eventually and I actually kinda liked it, but now I don’t really enjoy such things”.

That’s one of the many reasons you liked Donghyuck so much. His honesty. He wasn’t afraid to speak his mind about things that bothered him, or simply voice out his thoughts. So why wasn’t he doing it with his feelings too? Was it so hard for him too? Did he actually like you, like Jimin said? Or maybe you just wanted to believe that he did. If he really did, he would probably have said it by now.

But his actions spoke louder than his words. You couldn’t help but think about the way he looked at you under the night sky when you were staring at the stars but he was staring back at you. Or when he wiped your strawberry milk stains from the corners of your lips and his fingers stayed there brushing your lips a little longer than they should be. Or when he held you close to him among big crowds so that he wouldn’t lose you from his sight. Or when he would let you rest your head on his chest while he was stroking your hair so that you could fall asleep faster.

You swear you had heard him whisper something to you once, but when you asked him to repeat it he waved it off. Were you that desperate for his attention? Maybe. But maybe both of you were fools, afraid to let their heart be free because of the painful possibility that it might break.

You and Jimin were standing in front of the frat house door, the loud music blasting through the speakers behind the wall created a throbbing base sound in your ears, your heart beat in sync with the beat of the song that was playing from inside that house.

“Do we knock or...” Jimin trailed off before the door slid wide open and a tipsy young man stood by it. “Welcome ladies, come on in” he said. You and Jimin looked at each other for confirmation before hesitantly taking a step forward. The young man stepped aside so that you could get through the door.

The place was dark, the only source of light being the neon special effects lighting coming from the DJ set. The rooms were packed with people, some of them already drunk, some of them dancing all over each other, the mixed odor of sweat, alcohol and weed making you dizzy. At that exact moment you reminded yourself that this was why you didn’t like parties.

You and Jimin stood there, eyes wandering all over the room, trying to take in the scenery in front of you. “Damn, this is so cool” Jimin breathed out.

The guy who opened the door a few seconds ago was nowhere to be seen. A girl was walking with her sunglasses on, when she bumped into Jimin and spilled a bit of her drink on the ground, a drop of it landing on Jimin’s shoe. A “sorry” was barely audible on top of the loud music and Jimin stood there looking at her shoe in disgust.

“I guess it’s not that cool” she said and grabbed your hand. “Let’s go get ourselves some drinks.”

You walked towards the kitchen which was a bit brighter compared to the other rooms. Bottles of different types of alcohol were lined up on the kitchen counter. Juice boxes, ice and plastic red cups were placed on the kitchen table. A group of boys were refilling their cups with their alcohol of choice, while a couple was making out up against the wall next to the fridge.

Jimin’s disgusted expression from earlier appeared again. You decided to ignore your surroundings and went over to the kitchen counter to grab a drink for you and Jimin.

“Where’s Yangyang?” Jimin asked

“I honestly have no idea. He said he’d text me once he gets here, but I’m a bit surprised he didn’t arrive earlier than us. He doesn’t miss on such things” you said and Jimin nodded.

“And Donghyuck?” she asked again

You put the bottle of alcohol down and grabbed a box of grapefruit juice. You shrugged. “ No idea either.”

Jimin smirked at your answer, but she didn’t say anything. Instead, she took her cup and guided you out of the kitchen towards the living room. “Come on, let’s dance” she said.

The music was blasting into your eardrums and your body caught the rhythm of the music, adjusting its muscles to move along to it. It wasn’t as bad as you thought it would be. Your body was swaying to the fast-paced song that the DJ was playing when you felt your phone vibrate in your pocket.

[Hyuck]

where are you?

[Hyuck]

can’t see you

You lifted your head to look around the crowded living room in hopes of finding Donghyuck. It didn’t take you long before you could spot him among the crowd, though. You could never miss him anywhere, he always stood out in your eyes. Your gaze caught his, and his lips curved a bit when he saw you.

He tried to squeeze between the people dancing in the living room in order to get to your place. “What are you looking at?” Jimin asked you when she noticed that something bothered you.

You didn’t have time to answer her, because Donghyuck grabbed your arm to smoothly turn your body around and shift your attention to him. You felt a lump in your throat, your breath trapped inside your lungs. There he stood, messy hair falling onto his eyes, black graphic shirt and jeans, a Cuban link around his neck and matching rings on his fingers contrasting with the dark colors of his outfit. He looked gorgeous.

He flashed you a smile, raising his voice so that you could hear him. “Hi” he said. He simply said hi. Yet a group of butterflies started dancing in your stomach. You said it back.

Jimin got the message and leaned in your ear. “I think I saw some girls I know from one of my classes. I’d better leave you two” she said and turned on her heel to leave.

Donghyuck waved Jimin off and grabbed your hand. He then bent a bit lower and leaned in your ear. “Should we go somewhere quieter?” he asked you, his low voice vibrating in your ear. You could only nod.

Donghyuck walked in the front and you followed behind him, still holding his hand. He led you outside the house, towards the back yard. Plastic cups were scattered all over the grassy ground, two girls passed out beside some bushes, a guy sipping alcohol from a glass bottle and dancing on his own. Yeah, parties were weird.

You felt weirded out and uncomfortable at the sight and Donghyuck sensed it. He squeezed your hand and you looked up at him. He nodded to the large swing beside the barbecue stand and motioned you to go and sit there.

You sat down on the swing and Donghyuck copied your movement. He leaned his body towards the back so that it touched the back of the swing and with a swift motion, he pushed his feet on the ground and the swing started moving. You lifted your feet off the ground and let Donghyuck rock the swing smoothly.

You sat in silence for a moment, that comfortable silence that only existed when you were with Donghyuck, which was interrupted by his honey voice. “I don’t like parties” he simply said.

You turned to look at him but he was staring into the void in front of him. “ I have bad memories when it comes to parties” he said.

You didn’t speak. You didn’t want to. You always let him open up to you without interrupting his stream of thoughts.

Donghyuck drew in a sharp breath. “Remember that story I told you about that party? That one when I went home the next day and threw up all over the door? Yeah that one. I couldn’t bear going to something like this again when the last time I did, I didn’t even do it for myself. Did you know that I started drinking so that kids at my new school thought I was cool? That’s how I ended up spilling my guts all over my mother’s rug.”

He turned to look at you. “Pretty disgusting, huh?” he chuckled.

You chuckled too. You lowered your gaze to your feet. “Then why did you come here tonight?” you asked him.

“I don’t know” he said without even thinking about his answer. “I guess I came for my friends again.“ He paused for a second and spoke again “And I guess I also came to see you, mostly” he trailed off.

You stilled at his words and you thanked yourself for staring at your shoes and not looking at him, because he would be able to see the embarrassingly bright red color of your cheeks.

“But you see me everyday. We hang out all the time” you said.

“I know” he said. That’s all he said. What was that even supposed to mean?

Before you could speak, Donghyuck got up from the swing and extended his arm in front of you. “Come on, let's get out of here. This party sucks, we both hate it, so why waste our time? Let’s leave. Me and you.” he said.

You looked up at him. “Hyuck,” you trailed off “as much as I hate this party and as much as I want to leave with you, I promised Jimin to keep her company” you really hated that you had to say this.

“Jimin has found other people to hang out with, she’ll be fine, I know it.” Donghyuck said, a glimpse of hope in the tone of his voice.

That glimpse vanished when you rejected his offer for the second time, the corners of his mouth dropping to a frown. “I’m sorry Hyuck, I can’t” you said.

Donghyuck nodded to himself and put his hands inside his pockets. He cleared his throat but his voice still came out a bit raspy and low. “It’s okay, I get it.”

Your heart shuttered upon seeing him like this. You really didn’t want to make him feel bad, but you had also promised Jimin to be there for her since she wanted this so much. And you couldn’t let yourself break that promise, even though it was actually a bit trivial. Because in all honesty, Jimin would really be fine.

But also a small part of you was too flustered to spend time alone with Donghyuck at that moment. You felt as if you weren’t capable of controlling your emotions; your feelings kept growing stronger and stronger, and his presence alone was enough to make you feel overwhelmed with love.

The back door opened and someone came running through it. “Donghyuck, dude!” a guy you didn’t quite recognize yelled and came to grab Donghyuck by his arm. “You’re missing out on all the fuuuun my dude, come in back insideeee we’re gonna get fucking wasted!” the guy was yelling and patting Donghyuck on the back of his neck while dragging him inside the frat house.

Donghyuck said something you didn’t quite catch, and he tried to let go of the guy’s hold on him, but he failed to do so. The guy had already taken him to the back door and inside the house.

The door closed shut behind them and you left sitting on the swing by yourself, rocking it slightly with your feet. You shivered under the cool evening breeze and wrapped your arms around your body to shield yourself from the cold.

You didn’t want to go back inside. You promised Jimin to keep her company, but a frat party was the last place you wanted to be at, at that time. You grabbed your phone and, speaking of the devil, a few texts from Jimin appeared on your screen.

[Jiminie]

spotted yangyang. pretty sure he took a girl to a room

[Jiminie]

doesn’t he a gf?

You sighed reading Jimin’s texts. You really had to have a talk with Yangyang. And Jimin, for that matter. At least you knew that he was safe and that you probably won’t have to take care of him like a baby after you leave the party.

[you]

let him be, we’ll kick his ass tomorrow

[you]

where are you?

The text you wrote was delivered for the next 15 minutes. Jimin hadn’t read your message. All of a sudden, your hands became sweaty and your chest felt heavy as if a rock had fallen onto it.

Why didn’t she text me back?

Worry started welling up inside you and you rushed inside the house looking for your best friend. The music had got louder, the crowd was bigger, the smell of alcohol and weed more prominent. You went running up and down the stairs, kicking open every single door you found on your way.

Still, Jimin was nowhere to be found.

You stood at the edge of the stairway for a second to catch your breath. You opened your phone to call her and started walking towards the bathroom, the last room you didn’t check.

The phone was beeping in your ear, but Jimin didn’t pick up. You exhaled sharply and opened the bathroom door, still holding the phone in your ear. The sweat on your palms and the rock on your chest magically disappeared when you saw Jimin kneeling in front of the toilet with an arm holding her hair back out of her face.

A sigh of relief escaped your lips and you stopped the phone call. “Thank god you’re safe. I was so freaked out you bitch” you said and crouched down beside her. “Are you okay?” you asked her.

Jimin nodded and let her hair fall down her shoulders. She wiped her lips with the back of her palm before she spoke. “I’m okay. I had a bit too much alcohol and I threw up. But I feel better now. Sorry for making you worried” she said.

You opened your arms and she fell into your embrace. You stroked her head lightly, as you could feel her warm tears wetting the fabric of your shirt on your shoulder. She promised not to drink too much, but your gut somehow knew you’d better stay there at the party because something like this would be inevitable. “It's okay Jiminie, I was the one who left you alone, I promised to keep you company” you said.

She pulled back from the hug. “I guess we both broke each other’s promise” she chuckled and you did the same.

Jimin sniffled and wiped her already dry tears. “Why are you alone? Where is Donghyuck?” she asked you.

“We were sitting outside but then a random guy came and dragged him back inside. He seemed pretty wasted” you replied.

Jimin’s eyes widened and she stood up abruptly. “Oh no, oh no no no” she said.

You stood up too. “What? Jimin, what's wrong?” you asked her curiously.

“If it's the guy I think it is, then Donghyuck might be stupid drunk right now, or even worse, under the influence. We need to find him. Now” she said and ran out the bathroom and down the stairs, skipping a couple of steps while doing so.

You followed right after her, the rock falling on your chest again. You hated parties. This was final. Things like this are unavoidable in parties, and you hated the fact that your friends had to go through shit every single time.

The music wasn’t as loud as earlier and the living room didn’t feel as crowded. Most of the people were gathered outside in the backyard, or were already passed out on the beds or the floors of the bedrooms.

You and Jimin spotted a group of people gathered in a circle in the middle of the living room. Everybody was sitting on the carpeted floor, bottles of alcohol scattered everywhere around them. You noticed that a guy was holding a blunt and kept rotating it to every person gathered in that circle. Oh no. 

Their voices were mixed in with the music coming from the DJ set, so all you could see was their mouths moving without saying anything meaningful. The smoke of the blunt made the living room foggy and your lungs were struggling to work properly in between the crowded room.

The stinging sensation in your eyes caused by the smoke and flashing lights made your eyes watery and you could not tell apart any face in the crowd, except for Jimin who was standing next to you.

“What the fuck is going on in here?” Jimin whispered.

You rubbed your eyes in order to clear your vision without even caring if this would ruin your makeup. The faces on the people sitting on the floor became clearer, and it didn’t take you long before you spotted the familiar chocolate eyes looking drowsy, honey fingers placing the blunt in between soft plump lips.

A girl passed Donghyuck the blunt and he took a long and slow drag from it, exhaling the smoke into the thick air creating smoke rings. He then gave the blunt to the person next to him and he leaned back supporting his body with his elbows.

Donghyuck was wasted. Whatever that guy did to him in such a little time got to him immediately. His chocolate eyes were drowned in a pool of red, his hair looking messier than before and his clothes were all wrinkled.

You stood there frozen looking at him. If you had tried to keep him away from that guy, he wouldn’t have ended up in this situation. He had told you that he was pressured by other people to do stuff he didn’t want to do, but was he that naive to let this happen to himself once again? How many times has that even happened before? 

Your thoughts had carried you away, your vision was blurry again and your ears had blocked away all the sounds. An arm slung around your shoulders and you jolted up at the sudden touch.

“Where have you been bestie? You came rrright at the perfect time. We’re playing spin the bottle” Yangnyang said drowsily, his eyes painted in the same red shade as Donghyuck’s.

“Oh you’re here too, come on, sit down” he said to Jimin and dragged us both to the circle on the floor. He used both his arms and his full force to sit us down next to each other, and then he got up to sit across from us where he was previously sitting.

The girl to your left offered you the blunt but you rejected it without a second thought. Everyone was either stupid high or stupid drunk, some of them were both. You were suffocating. You felt like a total stranger there, even the existence of your own body was making you anxious.

You turned to Jimin on your right. “We need to go home” you mouthed and she kept nodding to herself constantly.

Your eyes roamed around the small circle, trying to find a way to get up and leave. But before you could do that, the chocolate pair of eyes that was now drowned in deep red, locked in with yours. A sense of déjà vu ran through your entire body, shivering under his gaze. This cannot happen again.

Jimin took your hand in hers and squeezed it tightly. She was uncomfortable and so were you. You tried to get up and leave, but the girl next to you dragged you back down.

A guy gulped down an entire bottle of alcohol before he put it down in the middle of the circle. You didn’t even bother to look at what type of alcohol it was.

Yangyang moved in closer to the middle and grabbed the bottle. “Alright, I'll go first!” he shouted and with a swift motion, he spun the bottle fast.

The bottle was spinning at a rapid speed until it came to a stop, its two ends pointing on two people you didn’t know. Apparently, you were the only one who didn’t know them because everyone else was super excited for their kiss. Or at least they were too high to understand what they were doing.

The bottle spun again. And again. And again. You lost count of how many rounds you were in, the same way your eyes were lost in Donghyuck’s. You kept him under your gaze, watching his every move and trying to justify the way he was acting. You had never seen him like this, so out of himself. What happened to the boy you saw a couple hours ago? The boy you knew ever since you were five? It felt as if he had almost lost whatever it was that made him different from the others. Right now, he looked like every other frat boy in that house.

But he didn’t really look at you. In fact, his mind seemed to be roaming around, not really paying attention to any of his surroundings except for when someone would pass him the blunt.

The bottle kept spinning and almost everyone had kissed someone else at this point. Yangyang took his fair share of the game as he kept on kissing a different girl in almost every single round.

Jimin squeezed your hand again and you realized how uncomfortable she might have felt. This time, you wouldn’t let any of the others stop you from leaving. Your friend wasn’t feeling well, but so were you. So you let go of Jimin’s hand and stood up, ready to leave.

As if fate was against you, you heard a burst of cheers and whistles coming from everyone gathered in the room. You regretted not leaving sooner, because the one end of the bottle was pointing at your side. And the other end was pointing at Donghyuck.

Cold sweat ran down your temples and a tight knot appeared in your stomach. This can’t be. You froze there standing still, staring at the bottle on your feet. You lifted your gaze from your feet to meet Donghyuck’s, who was staring back at you with a smug expression painting his face. From the corner of your eye, you could spot Yangyang grinning like a madman, his entire dentition on full display.

As if he did it on purpose, Donghyuck took a long drag of the blunt before standing up too so that his eyes leveled yours. The smugness on his face never left his features, his drowsy red eyes pouring into yours.

He slowly walked towards you, stopping right in front of your standing figure. His face was now way too close to yours. You could smell the alcohol and God knows what else on his breath, the heat of his body radiating to yours.

Donghyuck parted his lips and your breath got caught in your throat. His body somehow got even closer to yours. He tilted his head to the side and leaned against your ear. His hot breath was fanning over your ear, his lips softly grazing your skin. With a voice hoarse and low, he spoke loud enough for you to barely hear him. “Don’t worry sweetheart, we’ve done this before.”

You hadn’t even noticed which end of the bottle was pointing at you, but Donghyuck took the initiative himself and smacked his plump lips onto yours. His touch caught you off guard. You were standing there doing nothing, while Donghyuck placed both of his hands on the sides of your neck, his lips moving aggressively yet smoothly on top of yours.

You waited for him to pull away so that you could leave the party as soon as possible, but his intentions seemed to be different. He bit on your bottom lip in an attempt to part your lips so that you could kiss him back. You hated to admit it to yourself but it definitely worked. You parted your mouth just enough and moved your lips in sync with his smooth plump ones, the taste of alcohol from his lips transfering to yours.

The knot on your stomach kept on tightening more and more with each second passing. Your pulse rate had reached an infinite number of beats per minute and you were sure that your legs would not be able to hold you for much longer.

As if Donghyuck read your mind, he pulled away after leaving a last soft peck on your lips, removing his hands from the sides of your neck. He pulled back smirking at you as you were still standing frozen, your lips still feeling numb and swollen.. 

You had blocked away everyone else that was around you. You couldn’t hear anything of what they were saying. Your brain was still trying to comprehend what had just happened.

With a quick snap back to reality, you grabbed Jimin’s hand and turned your back to everyone else, storming off through the door of the frat house.

The night of the party you slept over at Jimin’s dorm. As soon as you exited the frat house, you went straight to Jimin’s car and you offered to drive since Jimin wasn’t in the right place to drive. She was still feeling unwell after she threw up all the alcohol she had consumed previously the same night, so you wanted to make sure she would be fine. But honestly, you weren’t feeling well either, and it wasn’t because you had drank.

Your mind kept replaying the moment Donghyuck kissed you like a video on loop. You were suddenly fifteen again, playing a silly game of spin the bottle with your friends where you happened to kiss your silly little crush. But now it happened again. And it wasn’t a silly game or a silly crush anymore.

Why was Donghyuck so complicating? All those times you hung out together, you never noticed him having any romantic intentions towards you. Everything he did or said was purely in the terms of friendship. But the way he approached you, touched you and kissed you at the party told you otherwise. Were you that blind not to notice his intentions?

You tried to excuse his behavior, saying that he was high or drunk and didn’t know what he was doing. Which is not necessarily a lie. It wasn’t his fault that he got peer pressured into drinking and behaving like one of the frat boys. He is the complete opposite of a troublemaker and ill-intended person; no wonder people found it so easy to talk him into things. 

Plus, it was only just a game. He sure didn’t think of it as something much of a big deal, so why would you give it so much importance? 

You mentally slapped yourself for thinking like this, because Jimin, who was already fast asleep, would yell at you for excusing Donghyuck’s behavior. He’s not a kid, he’s a grown-up, he knows what he’s doing, she would say. You had to wait until the morning to hear her scolding. The thing is, she wouldn’t be completely wrong about this.

During the thunderstorm of thoughts pouring inside your brain, a bold lightning struck in between. What if you confessed to him? Your heart couldn’t bear hiding what it felt for any longer. At that moment, you didn’t care if it would ruin your relationship with Donghyuck. He has acted recklessly enough quite a few times now, so you were allowed to be reckless for once too. He had to know how you felt, because this is what would make you feel at ease with yourself. He can’t find it so easy to kiss you in a drunk game and not feel anything either. After the spark that lit up with the touch of your lips and the butterflies that danced around the knot in your stomach, you knew you had to tell him. But the problem was that you didn’t know how to do it. 

For the meantime, you had curled up in Jimin’s bed hugging yourself tightly, crying your eyes out until sweet sleep brushed over them and closed them shut.

The morning of the next day you and Jimin went out to grab breakfast together. She was still feeling a bit weird because of last night’s events, but she said that a plate of chocolate chip pancakes would cure her hangover.

You were fiddling with your fork, scraping it at the surface of the plate, a screeching noise coming from it. Jimin visibly shivered at the sound and you stopped it.

“So,” Jimin began, swallowing a big piece of the pancakes, “wanna talk about last night?” she asked.

You put your fork down and sat back, crossing your arms. “I don’t think there’s anything to talk about. Everything is so confusing” you answered.

“Um, that’s exactly why we need to talk about it” Jimin said. She drank a full glass of water and then set it down on the table with a thud. It was so loud, you thought that the table might have broken.

“Donghyuck literally kissed you and we’re gonna completely ignore that? Come on Y/n, we cannot pretend it didn’t happen. Well, at least you cannot pretend it didn’t happen” Jimin said.

“Drop it Jimin, he was drunk, or high, or whatever.”

“No he was not. Well he was, but not that much. He knew what he was doing. Look, Y/n, Donghyuck has been a great friend to you and I know how much you love him for that. But when it comes to the romantic part of your relationship, he’s been nothing but an ass.”

You sighed and didn’t say anything in return. Jimin was right. He really was an ass when it came to romantic relationships. But you couldn’t ignore your feelings. You knew the way you felt when he touched you, when he leaned close to your ear and whispered to you, when his lips danced with yours.

The question is, did he feel the same?

You broke the silence by speaking up. “I think I’m gonna confess to him” you said.

Jimin almost choked on her food. She started coughing and you immediately got up and patted her on her back to prevent any accidents. You filled in her glass with water and helped her drink a bit.

“You what?!” Jimin practically screamed and you were thankful that the restaurant was not full that morning.

“I thought about it last night and I can’t keep suppressing my feelings, But I don’t know how to do it and I still think that Donghyuck might not like me back, hell, he only sees my as a friend, but at the same time I felt it when he kissed me, it felt different than the first time he did it back at that goodbye party before high school and God I hate parties becau-“

“Hey hey hey! Calm down bestie” Jimin interrupted you. You were panting, trying to catch your breath. You didn’t realize you went on an auto-rant mode until after Jimin spoke.

“It’s okay, I know it’s hard to do it. But if you finally feel confident enough to tell him, you should do it. We’ll think of a way to do that, together.” Jimin reassured you and you nodded to yourself.

Speaking of the devil, your phone screen lit up and a ting sound echoed in the room. You picked it up, only to see a text from Donghyuck.

[Hyuck]

see you at the park later?

You sighed again and made a mental note to text him back in a minute when you would have calmed down from your previous outbreak.

You really had to tell him, and you had to do it soon.

Despite your initial denial, you agreed to meet Donghyuck later that day at the park, at your usual spot. You were contemplating whether to meet him or not, because even though you wanted to confess, your anxiety and fear of a bad outcome got the best of you. 

You didn’t mind if you got rejected. You really didn’t care at all. At that moment, you just wanted to get it out of your chest. A few weeks ago, you would be dreading the possibility of Donghyuck rejecting your feelings and ruining your friendship. But right now you had none of that in mind.

You rode your bike on the way to the park in order to clear your mind with some fresh air. The sun had almost set and the park was becoming emptier. You spotted Donghyuck sitting on the ground with his back resting on a tree trunk. He had rode there on his bike too.

You went up to him and he only noticed your presence until after you sat down beside him. He turned his head to your side and he flushed you one of his precious bright smiles, the one that always made your heart skip a bit.

You didn’t want to lie to yourself, but your confidence from earlier magically vanished the moment you saw his face.

“How have you been? It was a mess last night” you spoke first and his smile dropped at the sound of your voice, his plump lips forming a soft frown, eyes falling down to his lap.

“Don’t remind me of that” Donghyuck said. He paused for a second before he spoke again. “I actually wanted to apologize for that. For whatever happened. I clearly didn’t mean anything I did or said, so if I did anything bad or weird, don’t tell me. I don’t wanna know. I promised myself I wouldn’t get carried away, but guess what! I did nothing but that. I’m sorry.”

You waited for him to finish with what he wanted to say before you said anything else. You went closer to him and rubbed his back in sympathy.

It took you a while to take in everything he said. What did he mean by “I didn’t mean anything I said or did”? Did he regret kissing you? Didn’t he feel the same spark, the same tingle, the same knot in his stomach?

You tried to push these thoughts away and focus on your feelings. It was time you put your feelings first, or rather, yourself. Your heart was beating out of your chest, blood rushing into your cheeks, as you gathered all your confidence and courage before you spoke up.

“Donghyuck?” you said in a soft, quiet voice, barely above a whisper. Donghyuck lifted his head, his chocolate eyes diving deep into yours, his skin glimmering under the moonlight like frozen honey.

That’s when your voice got stuck in your throat, and you stood there staring at him and he was staring back at you. “Wanna go on a ride with our bikes? To clear our minds?” you said.

He nodded and his plump lips curved upwards, his eyes creasing a bit on the sides. This is not what you wanted to say, but at least you said something.

You wanted to say so much more. So many things occupied the back of your head, you wanted to scream at him for giving you all these mixed signals, you wanted to scold him for acting so immature, you wanted to hug him and tell him that he’s too good for this world, you wanted to feel his touch and warmth on your body. But you did nothing for it.

You had to think of a way to confess to him without having to say any words. Otherwise, you would fuck up. Or you wouldn’t be able to do it at all, and you would be left with the burden upon your chest.

In the meantime, you were reminded how beautiful you felt every time you were with him. You relaxed, you laughed, you cried, you smiled, you frowned, you were stressed and then you were not. There was only one boy in all the world that could wake up every single emotion inside you and that boy was none other than Lee Donghyuck.

You still quite couldn’t put your finger on what it was that made him so different from the other boys. Maybe the fact that he was just a guy, like everyone else, but he seemed so gorgeous in your eyes. Maybe it was because you knew him in a way no one else did. That’s why you felt the need to share your feelings with him, because no matter what, you somehow knew that he would always love you back, even as just a friend. 

You were still mad at him for acting this way. But you could not completely ignore the person you knew because of one reckless incident. You knew Donghyuck very well, and you knew that he was better than this. You weren’t in the right mood to confront him after seeing how bad he felt with himself, so you chose to put whatever happened at the party towards the back of your head for a while and enjoy your time with him.

There is always the right time for everything.

“Aeri broke up with me” Yangyang announced, with a frown on his face that could reach the floor.

“She did? Yeah, I’m not surprised. You shouldn’t be either” you said.

“But why?” Yangyang whined.

“Are you serious right now?” Jimin spoke up “You literally hook up with every other girl, plus, you never gave her any attention! And you have the audacity to cry about it.”

You were walking on campus, heading towards your respective classes. It had been two days since the frat party, and Yangyang’s girlfriend found out about his doings and she finally snapped.

Donghyuck caught up to you and joined the conversation. “Oof, I found you guys, I was looking for you everywhere. Wait what happened?” he asked as soon as he noticed Yangyang’s frown in his expression.

“Aeri happened” you said.

“Who's Aeri?” Donghyuck asked, furrowing his eyebrows.

Jimin was the one to speak up this time. “Yangyang’s girlfriend. Well, now ex-girlfriend. It took her a bit long to come to her senses but I’m happy she finally did.” She turned to Yangyang and slapped him in the back of his head. “See, you never even mentioned her name, you idiot! You’re gross, honestly” Jimin said with a disgusted expression.

Donghyuck smiled slightly at Jimin’s comment, but none of them saw him but you. Was it just your idea or did he look extra fine today?

Jimin walked to your side and linked her arm with yours. “Now if you will excuse us boys, we have to talk about girl things, mhm?” Jimin said and dragged you away from them, leaving them walking behind you.

“So, I thought of the perfect idea” Jimin whispered, lowering her head.

“About what?” you asked.

“You will make a quiz and send it to him” Jimin said. You stopped at your track to take in what she just said. “What?”

“You want to confess to Donghyuck, right? So I did some research and came across this quiz that you supposedly send to your crush and then they have to respond and send it back to you I guess. What do you think?” Jimin said.

“It sounds childish. Yeah I don’t think it will work” you said.

“But why? Let’s give it a try. Please” Jimin whined and you couldn’t do anything but agree with her. “Okay, listen. I’ll see what I’ll do. If I feel confident enough to send it to him then we’re good, otherwise we’ll have to think of something else” you said.

Jimin screeched and hugged you tightly. “Thank you thank you thank you! Oh my god, I really think it will work. Plus, it’s not gonna be a face to face confession so don’t be nervous about it. You got this. I’ll meet you later after classes to work on it. Love you bestie!” Jimin said and ran off to her class, leaving you walking on your own in the campus.

Maybe her idea wasn’t that bad after all. This couldn’t go too wrong, right?

Later that day you met Jimin at your favorite café. You found her sitting at your usual table, scrolling on her phone.

Yangyang decided to tag along this time too. You bumped into him on your way out of campus and invited him for coffee too. You didn’t tell Jimin about it, but you were sure she wouldn’t mind.

You sat down next to her, and Yangyang went for the seat on the other side of the table, taking out his phone.

“Let’s start, take out your laptop” Jimin said and you did so. You opened an empty form sheet and stared at the cursor appearing and disappearing on the screen. “Well, how do I start?” you asked.

Jimin took the lead and turned the laptop to her side so that she could type on the keyboard easier. “So, we'll start with his name. Write something like, ‘Hi Donghyuck, if you’re receiving this it’s because I have a big fat crush on you and I don’t know how to tell you-‘”

“Shhhh,” you interrupted her “don’t say his name” you whisper shouted.

Yangyang raised his head from his phone screen and joined the conversation. “Don’t worry about it bestie, it’s not as if we don’t know about it. It’s so obvious that you like Hyuck to the point it hurts my eyes every time I see you looking at him. Can’t you be more discreet about it? What the fuck are you two even doing by the way?”

You were left speechless and kept blinking, staring at Yangyang. Of course he would figure it out, he’s been your best friend since you were literally babies. You shouldn’t be surprised by this.

“We’re making a confession quiz to help Y/n tell Donghyuck that she likes him. I saw it online and apparently it works wonders” Jimin said.

Yangyang stayed silent for a few seconds before he started laughing hysterically. You and Jimin looked at each other and then back at Yangyang, waiting for him to stop with his laughing outburst. 

You waited until he finally caught his breath, wiping a tear that slipped from the corner of his eye with his finger. “You guys are seriously so funny” he said.

“What's so funny about it, Yangyang? Hm?” Jimin asked him.

“I just find it such a stupid idea. Don’t you think it’s a bit childish? It won’t work” he said.

“That's what I thought too, but I’m gonna give it a try” you said.

“Okay, whatever” Yangyang said and went back to scrolling on his phone.

“Don’t give him any notice, Y/n. Let’s move on” Jimin said and started typing on the keyboard.

“So, we'll start with questions such as ‘Did you know that I liked you?’ and ‘If yes, then how did you know?’ and then ‘Do you like me back?’ and stuff” Jimin spoke while typing at the same time.

“Wait Jimin, don’t you think these are a bit too straightforward?” you asked. Jimin stopped typing and looked at you dead in the eye. “Are you kidding me? This is how a confession works, hello?” Jimin answered, full of irony. Through the corner of your eye, you saw Yangyang scoffing.

“Okay so next,” Jimin started typing again “you need to ask him the important stuff, which is what he thinks of you. And that includes what his first impression of you was, how attractive he finds you and how much he likes your personality.”

“How about we ask him something like ‘Is this awkward?’ because trust me, it probably is” you were the one who suggested a question this time.

Jimin wasn’t entirely sure if you were joking or not, be she agreed and typed it after the previous one. “Now, let’s end it with a precious moment between the two of you. One that he remembers, it might be anything” Jimin said.

She typed fast, her fingers running on top of the keyboard. Her eyes never left the screen, following the letters without even peaking at the keyboard to see what she was typing. She then pressed the enter key with all her strength and sat back on her chair. “And we’re done. It’s sent” she said.

The moment she said that the quiz was sent, you started trembling. You didn’t feel nervous up until that point. What if everything went downhill after this? It’s just a stupid quiz, you thought. Sure, the quiz was stupid, but your crush wasn’t. You were worried that once Dongyuck sees the quiz, he’ll start seeing you differently. You were only hoping that this differently didn’t mean negative, because if it did, your entire relationship with him would change. And you didn’t want to lose such an important person in your life over a not-so-stupid crush.

You didn’t see Donghyuck on campus the next day. You were sure about it because ever since Jimin sent him the confession quiz, he hasn’t left your mind. You kept looking for him everywhere but not because you wanted to see him. It was rather the opposite. You knew that if you saw his face after knowing that you had confessed to him, you wouldn’t be able to utter a single word. You avoided him.

You had to thank him, though, for making your job easier. Not a single sight of him on campus for the entire day. Good news.

But the bad news was that he didn’t text you throughout the day at all, which was odd. He would usually ask to meet at the park, or just text you about not anything of importance. But there was no sign of him that day.

A lot of thoughts formed in your mind at the same time. In the worst case scenario, there was something wrong with him. In the best case scenario, he felt way too awkward because of the confession quiz and he didn’t want to do anything with you. You couldn’t explain how this was the best case scenario, but you were worried sick about him. So you hoped for the latter.

You didn’t want to text him or call him though. You wanted to avoid him, right? Your current behavior didn’t match the confidence you had a couple days ago. It felt like you were more intimate with him now, you had exposed a piece of your inner self and you were scared that your actions would make him feel uncomfortable.

Yet, you decided to give him time. You wanted to wait for his response. Whatever it would be. You thought that your confession would help you ease your mind, but you’ve been thinking about him even more now. What if he didn’t feel the same? Of course, you would respect his feelings. You can’t force people to like you, or love you. But deep down, you knew it would hurt. You would still continue to love him even if he didn’t love you back. You cannot turn on and off feelings like a light switch. Loving him took a long time and getting over him would take even longer. You didn’t want to get over him. You probably couldn’t. So you wanted to keep loving him and hoped that maybe, there was a slight chance that he would love you back.

However, you didn’t see Donghyuck on campus the day after that either. But this time, you didn’t know if it was because you were avoiding him or because he just didn’t come to any of his classes.

Worry washed over you when neither Yangyang or Jimin had heard of him. “I thought he would be talking with you” Yangyang told you. Yeah, you thought the same thing.

After your classes ended for the day, you decided to go by his dorm and see him in person. You still felt like avoiding him but you didn’t have another choice at this point. You wanted to see him.

You put on your earphones and let the music keep you company while walking. Your heart rate was slowly increasing with each step you took, but you couldn’t explain if it was because you felt anxious or because your heart followed the beat of the music.

After listening to a couple of songs, you found yourself standing right outside Donghyuck’s dorm door. Taking off your earphones, you stood there still, waiting. You raised your arm hesitantly, knuckles touching the wooden surface of the door. You slightly pulled your hand away from the door and then your knuckles touched the door again.

Knock. Knock.

You drew a step back, arm falling to your side. And you waited.

One, two, three, four, five, si-

Donghyuck appeared behind the door, wearing a pair of gray sweatpants and a t-shirt, hair messy and eyes droopy.

“Hi, um, sorry d-did I wake you up?” you said.

“Um, no it’s fine, uh, is there something wrong?” Donghyuck said, rubbing his eye with his fingers.

And then you noticed the flush color painting his cheeks and the way he kept his eyes on the ground, not trying to maintain eye contact.

“I was just worried, you know? We haven’t seen you in two days and I just wanted to see if you-“

“I’m fine Y/n, there’s nothing to worry about, now please, I was in the middle of something so, uh, I’ll see you later, bye” Donghyuck interrupted you and closed the door right in your face, without even sparing you a glance.

What was this all about? Why was he acting like this?

You blinked away the tears that were forming in the corners of your eyes and walked away.

“Girl, you’re not the one avoiding him, he’s the one avoiding you!” Jimin said, munching on a cheeseburger. 

She swallowed her bite and spoke again. “What I think is, he’s in love with you too, but he’s an even bigger coward than I thought he was. I believe he got so flustered by the quiz we sent him, but don’t worry, he’ll come to his senses sooner or later.”

You rested your head on your palm and sighed heavily. “I don’t know Jiminie, his behavior is so confusing lately. I kinda regret sending him that quiz”.

“Uh oh, don’t say that again. You confessed and well done for that, so now it’s up to him to decide how the relationship between you two will go. Don’t blame yourself for how a man thinks. You never know what goes on inside those pea sized brains of theirs” Jimin said.

“So you say that he’s ignoring me because he likes me back?” you asked, a question which was addressed more to yourself.

“That's exactly what I’m saying,” Jimin said. “I mean, he couldn’t even look at you and his cheeks were all blushy and stuff? Girl, do we see the same things? Because this clearly shows he has lost his shit over you.”

You remained silent for a while, leaving Jimin to eat her cheeseburger in peace and allowing yourself to sort all of your thoughts that were scrambled inside your mind. Maybe she was right. Again. Her intuition regarding people’s feelings and behaviors is remarkable. She always left you wondering how she could be so good at reading other people.

You thought you were good at it too, until this boy named Lee Donghyuck came into your life. It wasn't that hard to understand him as a little boy, but now that you’re all adults, it seems like he has built walls around his heart and it’s not easy to read him anymore. The problem was that you didn’t know why he did this. He used to allow himself to be open and vulnerable with you. At least you thought so.

Now you are left wondering what’s in his mind and what is it that makes him act this way. Was the quiz that awkward? Did he see you in a different way now?

Questions like this kept messing with you and you wished you could unsend that quiz if it were to prevent this outcome. But you decided to give him a little bit more time. You were friends after all, right? Friends always come back to each other, no matter what. Right?

The next couple of days Donghyuck had been ignoring you still. Jimin said there was no point in feeling sad about it and that he would just snap one moment and realize what an asshole he was.

You hadn’t told Yangyang about any of that. He had mentioned the quiz once, asking you something like how you made it and what you wrote exactly, but nothing more specific about Donghyuck. So you decided to let it go, he wouldn’t understand anyway.

You were sitting at the park alone, leaning against a tree while watching the sun slowly hiding behind the hill, waiting for the moon to rise and take its place in the sky. The cheerful screams of little kids were gradually fading away and the park was becoming quieter, the only sound interrupting the silence from time to time was the barking of dogs.

You felt peaceful. You found a moment in time to have for yourself, a small escape from all of last week’s dramatic events. You breathed in the fresh air, you let your body relax and your mind roam around the scenery of nature in front of you.

This inner serenity didn’t last long though. Your phone chimed in your pocket and the screen lit up, the intense brightness hurting your eyes due to the contrast with the now darker sky.

You lowered the brightness in order to take a better look at the text on your screen. You squinted your eyes a bit further, this time not because of the brightness.

[Hyuck]

i really need to talk to you

it’s important

you know where to find me

i’m at your favorite place

You kept rereading Donghyuck’s texts over and over. So he ignores me for days and now all of a sudden he wants us to meet and he puzzles me with a riddle? What the hell?

You turned off your phone and stared blankly in front of you, trying to think of what place Donghyuck was talking about. You didn’t even care about what he wanted to tell you. You had to find him first.

The gears inside your brain got to work, spinning quickly and digging through your memories to help you find the answer. But you were already in your favorite place. The park. At least it was your favorite at the moment. So if he were at the park, where could he be? You would be able to see him by now.

The gears in your brain suddenly stopped moving and the light bulb shone brightly above your head. You knew exactly where he was. And it wasn’t the park. You grabbed your things quickly and rushed out of the park, heading towards the place you could never imagine that you’ll ever see again.

You had been walking for only ten minutes and your legs were hurting and started feeling wobbly. The one time you actually needed your bike, you didn’t have it. A sigh left your lips and you continued walking, looking at your phone from time to time in case Donghyuck texted you something else or called you.

You could tell that you were almost there by the red and gold lighting attacking your eyes, contrasting with the darkness of your surroundings. You squinted your eyes as a reaction to the sudden appearance of light, walking towards the source of red and gold. The smell of butter popcorn lured you in and that’s how you knew you were at the exact place you needed to be.

You stood under the bright sign, the same white balloons climbing up the pillars on each side of the gate, confetti sprinkled and glued in between them, fairy lights trailing upwards to the glowing sign. ‘Welcome to Dreamland’.

You stood in awe. You never thought you would visit this place again. It's been years since the last time you visited the amusement park and it felt strange yet so familiar sitting there, looking at the place that felt like your childhood home.

Your eyes were roaming around and you just stood still, not moving a single step further. For a moment, you had forgotten the reason why you were there in the first place.

The scent of the familiar cologne was roaming in the air, snapping you out of your thoughts. Donghyuck cleared his throat and you turned around to face him.

He looked beautiful. The lights of the amusement park were reflecting in his eyes, his hair fell softly covering his forehead, his plump lips curved upwards to a smile.

You noticed that he held his arms behind his back, but you didn’t question it. You just stared right into his eyes, just like he stared into yours. “Hi” he said, his voice blurred among the music and random screams from little kids running around the amusement park.

“Hi” you greeted him back, and then both of you remained silent, looking at each other. Your eyes started stinging from keeping them open for a long time, so you lowered your gaze to your feet.

Donghyuck sensed the awkwardness and cleared his throat again before he spoke up. “I’m sorry, Y/n” he said.

Your head jolted up at the sound of his honey voice and your gaze locked in with his. You parted your lips to speak, but he beat you to it. “I’m sorry. I know my behavior was shit. I was an asshole. I was ignoring you when I shouldn’t. I’m surprised that you came to see me after the way I treated you. So thank you" he said.

You didn’t want to speak. You didn’t have the courage to do so, but you also didn’t know what to tell him. Instead, you waited for him to continue talking.

Donghyuck’s gaze shifted from your eyes to other places around him and he pursed his lips. “You know, I received that quiz you sent me” he trailed off.

You gulped at the mention of the quiz and suddenly your heartbeat picked up a pace so fast that was probably beyond human.

“I didn’t-” Donghyuck started, “I didn’t send it back to you because I wanted to answer it now, with you here” he said.

You found yourself incapable of speaking at that moment. You simply nodded and diverted your gaze back to your feet.

“Please look at me Y/n” Donghyuck said and you froze, slowly lifting your head to see him looking directly at you. You could tell he was nervous by the way he inhaled sharply and the soft red color that painted his cheeks.

“I didn’t know you felt this way about me,” he started, “so when I saw that quiz I was so troubled. Maybe you were obvious with it, maybe not, but what’s certain is that I was too nervous around you to even notice anything.”

You tried to process his words and come to a conclusion. Everything that came out of his mouth didn’t make sense to you. Why would he be nervous around me?

Donghyuck gulped and continued. “Do you remember how we met?” he asked, but the question was mostly addressed to himself rather than you. You smiled at the memory. How could you forget such a pretty boy?

“It was here, this exact place. We were both running, we bumped into each other, fell down and then dropped your cotton candy” he said and started laughing. You did the same.

“And then we became friends. Inseparable friends. You have always been the sweetest friend I’ve ever had. You are kind, funny, you make me feel comfortable, you’re always there for me even though I behave so shitty sometimes” he said.

“And you’re so beautiful. I find myself staring at you when you’re looking away and I just ask myself how can a person be this beautiful” he said, his voice getting gradually quieter, just a little bit louder than a whisper.

“Do you know why I stopped contacting you when I left?” Donghyuck asked, this time the question addressed to you.

You cleared your throat before speaking, voice barely audible. “No.” It was the first time you spoke after greeting him.

Donghyuck shifted a bit, balancing his weight on one leg. “Because I liked you so much I couldn’t bear talking to you, knowing that I wasn’t able to see you, touch you and tell you how much I missed you” he said. “I thought that maybe, if I didn’t talk to you again, maybe it would hurt less than it did.”

You felt your lips drying, eyes widening upon hearing these words. This can’t be real. Yes, you wanted him to like you back, but you never expected it to be true. Even if you believed in a slight chance that he might like you back, it never occurred to you that it might actually be true.

“Hyuck, what are you talking about?” you asked him, not believing a single word he was saying.

“I’m talking about how much I like you, Y/n. Fuck, I might even be in love with you. I don’t know, I always get this weird feeling around you and I can’t get it to stop! I keep thinking about you and how I want to be able to kiss you without finding excuses with these stupid spin the bottle games! I like you so fucking much Y/n, I don’t know how to act.”

You stood still, frozen. So this is really happening, you thought. All this time you were worried about your feelings for Donghyuck when he was feeling the exact same way towards you. Your heart fluttered to the sound of his confession and you felt like smiling so hard until your cheeks hurt.

“Please say something Y/n” Donghyuck whispered. You didn’t say anything though. You didn’t have to. Instead, you took a couple steps further and stood right in front of him, placing your hands on each side of his neck, smacking your lips onto his.

He responded immediately, parting his lips slightly to kiss you back. He removed one arm from behind his back to cup your cheek with his hand and he kissed you gently and genuinely.

The knot in your stomach was untied, releasing the butterflies it had been holding in for so long. Donghyuck’s plump lips moved in sync with yours, his soft touch on your cheek sending streaks of warmth down your entire body.

You slowly pulled back to catch your breath, looking at him in his eyes, both of you smiling as hard as ever. “Of course I like you too, dumbass. I’ve liked you ever since I met you.” You said and Donghyuck smiled even harder than before, if it was even possible.

You removed your hands from his neck, dropping them to your side. “What is behind your back?” you asked him eagerly.

Donghyuck dropped his hand from your cheek too and brought his other arm from behind his back, only to reveal a stick of fluffy pink cotton candy.

Your eyes widened at the sight. It was the last thing you expected to see.

“You know, I promised to buy you one because I had dropped it when we bumped into each other, but I never had the chance to do that, so...” Dongyuck said and you slammed your body into his arms, grinning hard and laughing.

You squeezed him tightly and he returned your embrace, wrapping his arms around your waist, his head finding its way to rest in the crook of your neck.

“I think I love you, Donghyuck” you softly said in his ear.

Donghyuck’s grip on you tightened more and he breathed in. “Y/n, I know I love you” he said, just loud enough so that you and only you could hear him.

Donghyuck pulled back slightly so that he could see your face. He was still holding you tightly, as if he physically couldn’t let you go. As you were lost in the pool of honey in his eyes, he spoke with a low voice. “Do you think you’ll finally be able to beat me in bumper cars?” he said.

You laughed at his question and his smile grew wider to the sound. “No, you’re too slow. I actually pity you” you said.

Donghyuck poked the inside on his cheek with his tongue and raised his eyebrow at your answer. “Oh yeah? Let’s find out, bitchass” he said and linked his fingers with yours to guide you to the amusement park.

Just like that, your heart was full. It was right at the place it needed to be from the very beginning. It was finally home.

The doorbell chimed behind you and a chill breeze entered the inside of the diner for a brief second. You didn’t have to turn your head to realize that a group of high school kids entered the diner, their voices were too loud and annoying. You rolled your eyes and popped a french fry into your mouth.

It’s been about two weeks since you and Donghyuck made it official. You agreed to start a relationship that very night you confessed to each other outside the amusement park. Donghyuck only agreed to go out with you if he won three consecutive races at the bumper cars ride. Turns out you ended up crashing his car in every single round, but Donghyuck kept on saying that he didn’t really mean what he said and kissed you into agreeing to go on another date with him.

You were happy. Ever since you started dating, you found yourself enjoying the time you spent with Donghyuck even more than you did before. It’s not that many things changed, it was mostly the same things you used to do. The only difference was that neither of you was afraid to express their true feelings anymore.

You and Donghyuck were sitting next to each other at the diner booth. Donghyuck had his arm wrapped around your shoulder, while he used his other arm to grab french fries from the bowl on your table. You agreed to buy just one bowl of french fries to ease your appetite before you ordered your actual meals.

Donghyuck was talking to you about the drive-in cinema that will start working again next week. He said that they would be playing one of his favorite movies, so he practically begged you to go with him and treat it as a date as well.

“What are you guys talking about?” you heard Jimin’s voice and you looked up to see that she had just arrived with Yangyang standing there next to her. 

“Oh hey guys, we didn’t hear you entering. I was telling Y/n about the drive-in, it’ll be open again next week. Wanna go-wait-” Donghyuck started saying, but he cut himself off when he noticed that Yangyang was holding Jimin’s hand.

“Dude what?” Donghyuck asked again and you sat there staring at your friends with eyes wide open. Jimin and Yangyang were grinning at your and Donghyuck’s reactions, before they went to sit on the booth opposite of yours.

“Yup, it is exactly what you think it is. Now, what were you saying about the drive-in?” Yangyang casually joined in the conversation without addressing the matter that clearly needed to be addressed.

“Jimin, why didn’t you tell me about this? How long have you guys been going out?” you said smiling at your friends.

“Not that long, just a few days after you guys. See, I was going to tell you about it Y/n, but Yangyang thought it would be funnier if we just showed up one random day like this and let you guys figure it out on your own” Jimin said and Yangyang kissed her forehead before wrapping his arm around her shoulder.

“Yeah, turns out that stupid quiz you girls thought of works wonders” Yangyang said and popped one french fry that he stole from the bowl.

“Wait, Yangyang, you were the one to send Jimin the quiz? Oh how the tables turn” you said and he waved you off.

You weren’t even the slightest bit surprised that Yangyang and Jimin were dating now. Honestly, it was quite obvious that there was something going on between them, but both of them were way too stubborn to admit it. Was it that way with you and Donghyuck too?

The four of you spent time at the diner that night. The feeling of being carefree and relaxed around your friends reminded you of the time you used to spend all together back in high school. It really felt as if you never lost touch with one another, everything was back to normal. Except this time, your heart felt at ease too.

It was getting quite late and the diner was almost empty now. The four of you didn’t really have the heart to check the time and make a move to get up and leave, you were having way too much time to just call it a night.

You had now ordered a second round of drinks, non-alcoholic though because none of you was really that good at staying sober. Instead, you just stuck with fizzy drinks and sodas.

Yangyang emptied out his second bottle of coke before he slammed it on the table. He licked his lips and sighed. “Wow, this was a good one” he said. But this wasn’t the only thing he had in mind. You could tell by the smugness of his expression.

Yangyang smirked and then lifted his head to flash one of his signature wide grins. “I don’t wanna go home yet, guys. So, who’s up for a game of spin the bottle?” he asked.

Jimin kicked his leg under the table, Donghyuck sat up and smacked him in the head and you stretched your arm to pinch his nose. The four of you burst out laughing, thinking about how things would have turned out if it wasn’t for Yangyang’s stupid ideas.

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[thewritersaddictions]

Day Eleven: Negan Smith + Tender Sex

If anyone knew the type of person that Negan was it was you. Not a single person knew that Negan could be soft, and gentle. Sure he was good with kids and sweet to the older women who walked around. But you, you are the exception. he's bends over backwards for you, he's let you walk all over him, use him as bait, he'd take torture for you. You have his heart in a way that almost make him submissve in a sense.

Almost is the key word there.

Everything about Negan is the opposite of submissive. The way he commands a group of people, how he talks to every single person besides you of course. It's just different with you.

Your Negan is your loveable teddy bear. You know the bigs ones that get sold during valentines. All he wants is to be held, and loved. That's what he really wants.

Sex used to be harsh. All about getting whatever he wanted from you. A race to the finishing line, a show of dominance, but as the years have passed and it's longer about showing you how great he is (or wants you to believe he is) it's now about showing you just how much you mean to him.

Sweet longing kisses that spread from the crown of your head, to the top of your feet. Negan isn't afraid of getting dirty, and he sure as hell doesn't allow things like your period to get in the way. He's here to love you not care that you're body is doing exactly what your body should be doing.

Sweet nothings in your ear that have you shivering. Your spine tingles with excitment as the words that leave Negans mouth have you yearning for more of his touch. "My sweet girl, so soft.", "I could eat you right now babydoll.", "You're so fucking perfect baby, yeah that's it open up a little more for me."

Every touch with Negan is slow, and meaningful. It has to be, he doesn’t know when he'll see you again. He treats everyday as if it's his last with you. That could be morbid if it wasn't so fucking adorable.

Your begs never go denied. You get what you want one hundrend percent of the time. You want him to touch you more he does, you want him to fuck you harder he will, you want his lips on your he gives them to you. "More negan please, give me more!?" It's a beg and a questions and everything rolled into one.

He can't deny his sweet baby doll, so he falls into line. Kissing you more, taking the air from your lungs, thursting harder into your wet cunt, so that the sound echos off the walls of the cinderblock room, you want his hands on you more he's got you sweet thing, a hand rests on sternum. Negan can feel the way your heart beats under his callussed hand.

Nothing is sweeter then being laid gently down on your shared bed, your clothes taken from your already worn out body. Stripped with ease and patience as the bra gives Negan a hard time. It's never a rush anymore, he takes his time. He cherises it with you. Commits it to memory in the best way possible.

For Negan its like collecting memories and trapping them in glass bottle to use for another time. He captures the way your breathless moans have the hair on the back of his raise, the way your nose scruntches up, and your knuckles go white around the bedsheet.

It's all commited to his memory, so if he may loose you. He might lose you phyically, but he'll never lose you mentally. You'll always be there with your little giggles, and flick of your wrists, a pout when something doesn't go your way.

But for now he won't think to long about loosing you, not when his hand is combing through your hair and your breaths have just gone even.

Completed on: 10/12/24

Posted on: 10/14/24

Kinktober 24'-

[simjaexy]

HYUNG LINE

Wanting You (series, smut) - Completed

Synopsis ⇀ In a bustling college campus, Heeseung, Jay, Jake, and Sunghoon—are the ultimate heartthrobs, each excelling in their respective sports and capturing the hearts of many. One day, they come up with a playful challenge to see who can win the heart of the same person, you. A girl that was too kind for her own good, too innocent for her own good. As they each use their unique charms and talents to impress, they soon realize that maybe not everything could be a challenge. They can’t help that they want you.

Husband! Enha Hyung Line! x Fem Reader (fluff, drabble)

Synopsis ⇀ Just them being in love with you as a married couple.

Enha Hyung Line! x Fem Reader (smut, little angst, drabble)

Synopsis ⇀ Arguments with hyung line leads to steamy moments at the end.

LEE HEESEUNG

Oblivian (smut)

Synopsis ⇀ You had a stressful day at work and topping it all with coming back home to Heeseung getting nothing done around the house. Angry, you ignore him, but he has ways for you to forgive him.

Make You Mine (fluff)

Synopsis ⇀ You knew your neighbor, Heeseung, always liked you more than just a neighbor, but you weren’t the type to be swayed. Heeseung understands, although that doesn’t stop him to try to win your heart

At The End Of The Night (smut)

Synopsis ⇀ After having trouble falling asleep, you decided to roam around in the mist darkness of the night, not knowing you were being followed by someone, or something.

I’m Yours (smut, angst)

Synopsis ⇀ Sometimes Heeseung gets jealous a little too much when you talk to other guys or when they flirt with you, so you have to remind him that you belong to him.

Cross My Heart (smut, angst)

Synopsis ⇀ You were a nerd, always with your nose in a book, acing every test, and keeping a low profile. What comes as a normal life of yours soon takes a turn when your mom finally gets married to a man that you soon found out was Lee Heeseung dad, the school bad boy. Even though Heeseung doesn’t know you, he can’t help but want to corrupt you in every possible way. So what happens when new things start to unfold between you two that he’s never felt before with someone?

PARK JONGSEONG

Morning (smut)

Synopsis ⇀ Jay works from 9 to 5, so it’s not a bad reason for you to have fun with him in the morning.

Laundry Girl (fluff, crack)

Synopsis ⇀ Jay hated the laundry mat. He didn’t like how loud the noises were, the kids that would cry loudly, but what he most of all didn’t like was his clothes getting stolen. That’s was until he met you.

In The Quiet Moments (fluff, drabble)

Synopsis ⇀ You find yourself gently tracing the contours of Jay's face as he sleeps peacefully beside you.

Teach Me (smut, drabble)

Synopsis ⇀ You stop by jay’s studio to visit him and end up with him teaching you how to play the guitar. What you also end up with is his fingers inside you.

Unscripted Chemistry (smut, angst, fluff)

Synopsis ⇀ You’ve always had a crush on Lee Heeseung ever since he gave you a note, also considering the fact he was one of the most popular boys in school. Considering being popular yourself, you just can’t seem to get his attention no matter what you do. So you decide to fake date Jay, Heeseung's best friend, to get Heeseungs attention. Despite thinking that Jay hates you, you go along with the plan, hoping that Heeseung will finally notice you. As the charade progresses, you found out Heeseung is attracted to people who are experienced. However, you’re a virgin. So why not ask Jay to take your virginity? No feelings will be involved, right?

Workaholic Jay (requested, angst, fluff, little smut, drabble)

Synopsis ⇀ You felt like Jays been neglecting you with his work, so what’s better than getting him back by leaving him dry?

SIM JAEYUN

EXAMS (smut)

Synopsis ⇀ After finishing an exam that you worked your ass on, you decided to go to a party you and your friends been invited to not knowing the party belongs to the famous fuckboy Sim Jaeyun.

Love Me Like You (fluff, angst)

Synopsis ⇀ After your break up with Jake after thinking he wasn’t enough for you, you find out that he was just the right person that can love you the way you want to be loved.

Todo De Ti (fluff)

Synopsis ⇀ Wanting to get out of the house you decided to go with your friend to a roller skating rink that opened. Upon going there you meet someone that took a liking to you and doesn’t plan on leaving you alone.

The Stupid Bet (fluff, angst)

Synopsis ⇀ After having an embarrassing accident with the schools popular boy, Sim Jaeyun, you two decided to make a bet that will change your lives for the worst or for the better.

Our Little Secret (smut, angst)

Synopsis ⇀ you always knew your professor was attractive, so it wasn’t new when girls would try to gain his attention. what you didn’t know though was that he only had his eyes on you. what comes as a friendly teacher-student relationship takes a turn when you find yourself thinking differently about him with your private lessons together.

PARK SUNGHOON

Black Coffee (fluff, drabble)

Synopsis ⇀ While working on your normal shift, you stumble upon a man that you've never seen before order a black coffee. You can't help but be intrigued by the mysterious man because of his looks.

Flexible (smut)

Synopsis ⇀ Sunghoon loved how you are flexible a little too much. He decided to take advantage of it.

The Rain (fluff, drabble)

Synopsis ⇀ You and Sunghoon decided to walk in the rain as your date.

Teach Me English (fluff, drabble)

Synopsis ⇀ English was not Sunghoon first language so it was understandable that he didn’t like it. So instead, you teach Sunghoon English, and when he gets it right, he gets a kiss.

Hidden Desires (smut, angst)

Synposis ⇀ you knew sunghoon ever since you were little with him being your big brothers best friend. what jay didn’t know though, was that you always had a secret crush on sunghoon. despite your feelings, you believe sunghoon doesn’t like you back and sees you as nothing more than his friends annoying little sister. right?

Boxer Sunghoon (smut, requested, drabble)

Synopsis ⇀ You decided to visit Sunghoon at his boxing practice. But upon seeing him practice, you couldn’t help but feel a sexual way watching him practicing so focused and determined. So what happens when you decide to tease him while he’s practicing?

KIM SUNOO

Skincare With Sunoo (fluff, drabble)

Synopsis ⇀ You noticed Sunoo been stressing about work, so you decide to make him feel better with a skin care night.

Jealous Sunoo (requested, smut, drabble)

Synopsis ⇀ Sunoo gets jealous easily so he shows you who you belong to.

YANG JUNGWON

Sleepy Nights (fluff, drabble)

Synopsis ⇀ Jungwon decided to stay the night at your house since your parents were gone for the week. Not only did you guys make delicious cookies, you also had sleepy conversations in your room.

Movie Theater (smut, drabble)

Synopsis ⇀ Your best friend, Jungwon, asked you out to go to the movie theaters, not knowing he was going to confess his love for you in different ways other people wouldn’t do.

Where Stars Meet (fluff, drabble)

Synopsis ⇀ You and Jungwon decided to have a date at the park.

Where My Words Stand (angst, fluff, drabble)

Synopsis ⇀ Idol life has been getting to Jungwon and he lashes it out on you.

Healing Heart (angst, fluff, smut)

Synopsis ⇀ After a traumatic event leaves you struggling to cope, you get admitted to a mental hospital in hopes of finding peace and healing. Feeling lost and overwhelmed on your arrival, you meet Jungwon, a fellow patient with his own burdens and a mysterious past. Even though Jungwon is a bit hot headed and tend to come off as rude and smart to people, you find solace in Jungwon company. What happens when you and Jungwon go through struggles together? Will he open up to you to his mysterious past? Or will he shut himself out, just like he did with everyone else?

NISHIMURA NI-Ki

(Un)lucky Days (fluff, crack)

Synopsis ⇀ Already having a rough day, you would assume you would have a calm moment walking along a trail with calm music in your headphones, only to get hit by a basketball, can it get any worse when you see it’s your enemy, Nishimura Ni-Ki.