#leaving an abusive home

[bitchesgetriches]

As a teenager, life gave me lemons.

I ate the lemons—skins, seeds, and stickers.

Many years later, I wrote a guide to help others eat lemons.

This is a guide to leaving home before 18. It ranks among the most important and most personal things I've ever written. It's also one of our most popular guides of all time. So I updated and expanded it. To make it as accessible as possible, we recorded audio and video versions too. My lemon-flavored heart would swell with joy and citric acid to know it reached people who need it.

But it's a fight share it. Heavy topics like this get muted and buried on most social platforms. Even worse, this administration is deleting surveys and data about it; my .gov sources transmogrified into 404s before my very eyes. Gonna post this, and pray that Tumblr does what Tumblr does best.

How To Leave Home Before 18

Video Version 🍋 Audio Version 🍋 Text Version

[gamchawizzy]

Hi everyone 🥺 so sorry to do this right before the holidays but once again I am asking for help in footing some vet bills for my dogs

As some of you may know, we have 7 dogs. There was a mite outbreak in my area quite recently and they all got infected, some of them developing scabs and rashes and losing hair... I was saving up to get them all treatment but the medicine (bravecto) costs around 1300 php and I had to prioritise one of my dogs, Gaspar, because he wounded an eyeball. It's difficult for me to keep up because on top of my house bills, I have to give them all treatment at the same time, otherwise the mites come back OTL... today, my girl rottie, Emma, just gave birth out of nowhere and we weren't aware at all. I have been pushing to get her neutered but my family would not allow it as she is a senior. The puppy wants to feed but she cannot latch as Em's nips are too swollen for her. I was able to get her to latch onto one of my other smaller dogs but I can't do it for too long as the dog rejects her :,(

My family aside from my mom are also very uninvolved with pet care, and the best my mom can do is assist with feeding the dogs. I'm not sure if I can give the dogs away to better homes because I could get punished. The best I can do is give them some immediate care for now while I try to stabilise my situation

At the moment I am still working on a queue of commissions and I'm not very sure about advertising them right now, but I am very grateful for any donos - 1 usd ≈ 50 php so everything super duper helps.

If ypu'd like, you may also ask for doodles from me via my ko-fi. I'm hoping to raise around 10k-13k php so I can cover some basic medicines and vet bills. I don't even have plans to provide for the family for the holidays at this point, I just want the dogs to get better

My tip jar is

ko-fi . com/gamchawizzy

I will also attach a proper link in a reblog

Please do not feel obligated to dono if you are also in need, I am very appreciative of shares as well.

Thank you so much, love you all, happy holidays 😭💖

[ofswordsandpens]

"the Gabe and Sally dynamic in the show is abusive" and "the way they've portrayed Gabe in the show is distinctly different from his book counterpart and fans can criticize that" are two discussions that can coexist

[gur0beetl3]

Leaving my abusive household.

Hello, I try to not get too serious or talk about my private life too often, but today I've finally started up a gofundme to. Well. Get out of the abusive situation I live in. It's something I've thought long and hard about, and while I hate having to resort to this, all other options have failed me, and I'm desperate to leave so I can start actually living. Please, any and all help sharing this around will mean the world to me, as this situation has gotten dire, and I honestly cannot live in this house with my mother for another year.

Thank you for taking the time to read this post, I appreciate it, and I hope you have a wonderful day.

[ace-and-the-rpg-horrors]

it actually irritates me so much when people bring up the TENMA parents when someone's discussing Mrs Asahina, Harumichi or even Shinei. if you think poor Mr and Mrs Tenma are remotely comparable to those three disgraces, i am going to assume you don't read

[dukeofthomas]

"Angry robin" "violent robin" "misbehaving robin" shut up and accept my alternative; spunky Robin. Determined and head strong, can out-stubborn the Batman, has a strong moral-backbone and does what he thinks is right regardless of what anybody else says, Robin. Jason who was sassy and quippy and made crude jokes with a smile on his face. Jason who hid in Bruce's cape and whispered gossip to him. Jason who, if Bruce refused him something, could keep bothering endlessly until Bruce caved. And also dramatic Jason. If Bruce tells him no, it becomes a whole theatrical show; a monologue, a narration, embellishments, and falling onto the floor in his grief upon the fact his cruel father has denied him once again.

(Jason who has suffered through abuse and homelessness and poverty and starvation, who is the Fight out of Fight or Flight, who's built up defenses and walls and when pushed and triggered responds with the thing that's always protected him; anger. He's sweet and kind and funny, and when he sees a pimp hitting a prostitute he gets furious and responds with violence.)

[batcavescolony]

Why do people keep saying they want Agatha to adopt Billy or that Billy is a motherless child or that Agatha is Billy's new mom.... Y'all he says Rebecca is his mom, canonically in the show. Agatha isn't his mom.

[aliusfrater]

you know the more i think about the events of season eight from sam's perspective the more i think. yeah id want to kill myself too

[z0mbiefrank]

you GUYS i am officially enrolled in my degree i am so unbelievably happy!!!!! i have been fighting for my life to get here. i had to turn down all my uni offers when i was a teen (had to move out independantly bc of domestic violence and disability/health complications). i've always known exactly what i want to do with my life but everything got put on hold whilst i desperately tried to sort my shit out. BUT IM DOING IT NOW!!!!!

[shitpostingkats]

Feel free to ignore this, but I have to ask since I've been rewatching yugioh 5ds and you're one of the very few blogs I've searched that mentioned Satellite Bros age order. I'd love to hear your thoughts on this and if you know other blogs that talk about it.

WHY WOULD I EVER IGNORE THIS ITS ONE OF MY FAVORITE THINGS. THANK YOU SO MUCH <3

*takes deep breath* ok SO

Word of god canon is that the age order is Jack (19), Yusei (18), and Crow (17), at the start of the series.

But while you can make an argument that Yusei would have records, people who knew when he was born, or at least a birth certificate, Jack and Crow are orphans. If Jack is indeed 19, then he would have been roughly a year old when Zero Reverse happened, likely killing his parents, at the very least destroying a massive amount of city infrastructure. You tell me Jack knows his birthday and I press (X) to doubt.

Crow is apparently canonically younger than Yusei, but. His parents also died in Zero Reverse.

This. This straight up does not work.

Also Yusei is shown to be a baby when Zero Reverse occurred and if Crow's parents did indeed die in Zero Reverse when he was under a year old he there is NO WAY he would live much longer than that. That's just. How babies work.

CROW HOGAN HAS TO BE OLDER THAN YUSEI.

I will die on this hill. I watched the show thinking Crow was the middle brother and then learned their apparent canon ages after because he has to be older than Yusei for any of his backstory to make sense. Konami can fight me on this.

NARRATIVELY they are the middle and youngest child. Jack has Past motifs, Crow is Present, and Yusei is Future. Jack and Yusei's whole dynamic is the most oldest sibling vs youngest sibling drama possible.

As for Jack, I always like to think it was his birthday like, a week before Yusei leaves Satellite, because being a Newly Minted Twenty Year Old explains everything about his personality.

[justanothermerthurshipper]

Sid/Sullivan || Silver Spoons

spoilers for 12x01

partly inspired by @regencypoet's beautiful gifset on Father Brown's use of food as a metaphor for love

[bitchesgetriches]

(tw financial abuse)

Escaping abuse when you're not allowed to have a job-Written by a person who has actually had to figure out a way to leave while being financially abused:

Note: You don't have to do all of these tips. Figure out what works for your situation.

A. I highly recommend looking into jobs with housing included. Websites like coolworks, workaway, WWOOF, etc. Apartments can be really expensive, so this can give you a place to go until you have enough money to rent an apartment. Make sure to check reviews/do your research so you don't get scammed. I highly recommend checking out coolworks at the very least, since you can apply to a lot of the jobs on there with an email and a resume.

Another option (that I haven't tried, but I wanted to share in case it helps) is getting a scholarship and attending a community college with dorms.

B. Get some way of storing money. Reloadable gift cards (they have fees though). Cashapp (yes, it can be used as a bank). One of those banks where you don't need a social security number to open them. An e-bank, if you don't have proof of address. Be aware that they'll likely send a debit card to whatever address you input when you open them.

C. Gift cards are your friend. I know this sounds like a strange tip, but they're very useful. You can sell them, use them for important purchases (like GED tests, food, certificates, or even transport), or transfer the money to yourself. On that note, save any money/gift cards you are given.

There are ways to get free gift cards, so I recommend looking into that.

Note: You can't buy from certain places with gift cards. Try to check if you can use them before inputting the card info, because otherwise the money could be put in 'pending' for who knows how long.

D. Get a second mailing address if possible. UPS, USPS PO Box, a mailing box at your university, etc. They can (sometimes) be used as a mailing address for jobs. PO box prices are different in different places, so check out your options in order to find the least expensive option. There are ways to work around not having a mailing address, tho.

E. Getting money is important. There's a reason it's listed in every single 'escaping abuse' guide.

You may have to be really creative when it comes to getting money-especially since online work can be inconsistent *glares at the transcription company I tried that rarely has work*.

You can transcribe, test websites, sell things (plasma, trash, clothes, photos, etc) proofread, take surveys, play games (there are websites like inbox dollars and freecash where you can get money for this), upload receipts to cashback websites, mystery shop, join focus groups, invest, review books, watch videos, etc. There's a lot of websites online (like makingsenseofcents.com or theworkathomewoman.com) that give various ideas for how to make money. I've even heard of people making money through making memes. Be creative, and look around until you find something that works for you.

Note: Unfortunately, a lot of these things do not pay very well. Sometimes they only pay cents or dollars. The problem is...getting money as a financially abused kid can be very difficult (I would know) and you may have to resort to low-paying work (I had to, unfortunately). You should try to find high paying work, don't get me wrong, and I highly recommend finding a way to make money that actually gives you a decent wage. In the meantime, try to get as much money as you can. Don't do things that require too much time for too little reward. Read the terms and conditions.

Cont: Even a little money can add up. 50 cents a day is 15 dollars a month, 180 dollars a year. 1 dollar a day is 30 a month, 360 a year. 10 dollars a day is 3600 in a year. It may not seem like much, but it is something).

More notes: If you want to transcribe, try looking into less mainstream/famous companies (a lot are not hiring/have very long wait times). I think there's a list of 78 transcription companies somewhere....

E. Make a resume-this will allow you to apply to a lot of jobs on websites like coolworks. I know, this can be very hard when you'e not allowed to have a job, but there are a few options. You can put certificates on them, unpaid work (like a redbubble store or webtoon. Bitchesgetriches has lot of tips on how to reframe this type of stuff), hobbies, etc.

F. Try to find somewhere you can do virtual job interviews (both phone and zoom). Libraries (A lot of them have private study rooms, if you have a library card), Universities, Playgrounds, secluded areas, one-room bathrooms even, etc. Anywhere your parents won't bother you. Be aware that other people may report back to your parents as well.

G. On references: You can say "I don't have references, this is my first job" or contact high school/college professors and ask them to be your reference.

H. If necessary, find a way to have internet independent from your parents. A separate phone plan with hotspots, hotspots (some libraries will give them to you if you have a library card), libraries, universities, malls, coffeeshops, etc.

Hi babies! This is from a baby bitchling who read our guide on how to escape an abusive household before age 18 and say "Hey, I've lived that. Let me add to your advice!" They wanted to remain anonymous, so I told them to write it out in an ask and we'd post it.

We're so grateful to this brave bitchling for sharing their lived experience in order to help others. <3 This is the true spirit of Bitches Get Riches.

Here's our guide for more:

How to Leave Home Before 18

[tittyinfinity]

The other day I freaked out bc I offered my friend some CBD gummies, then she offered to some her mom, and it wasn't until after her mom took it that I realized that with the 500mg CBD it also included 25mg THC and her mom wasn't a weed user so she was about to experience being high for the first time. After a while she started doing some chores, asking very philosophical questions, giggling at her own jokes, and was extremely happy. She ended up coming up to me and thanking me, saying they helped her immensely, including taking away a lot of her joint pain. So it ended up going well! But damn I felt like a piece of shit there for a minute lmao

[urproblematicfav-arsonk]

ok you made good points for the most part but something in your helluva post confuses me: how in the world has stolas been "sexually abusing octavia the entire series"?

going off of the definition of sexual abuse (rape, assault, trafficking, molestation, coercion, etc.) i cannot think of anything that even remotely points to evidence of that.

surely, SURELY you aren't claiming that just because he said something sexual on the phone in front of her? not even TO her or ABOUT her? that's a misstep for sure, but going so far as to call that sexual abuse is... just not correct.

maybe if he did it on purpose or specifically because she was around, but to me it reads like he forgot she was there and got caught up in the phone conversation. there's no evidence that it happened more than once either, so "the whole series" is a biiig stretch.

i REALLY hope that specific moment isn't what you mean, because that's the kind of claim that really softens the meaning of the term... but i really can't think of anything else that even suggests it.

I feel like theres definitely a way to say "Hey! We seem to disagree on this interpretation of this show! I have no fucking idea where you are coming from, can you explain?" Without turning it into a...definition....of rape.......to the rape victim........and also accusing said rape victim of "softening" language?? Would the term sexual harassment be better?? I personally think it's arbitrary to say "thats not technically sexual abuse, its just weird, stop calling it that" when it's something sexual.....that hurts someone?? Idk its semantics.

So anyway ignoring the vibes you brought to the table, I was talking to my irl friend about Helluva, back when the stolitz shit was happening. And I was complaining because of how CLEAR the abuse in that dynamic is to me. And he was like "I think cuz of your trauma that you're reading into it too much and taking it too seriously." And I was like "IF VIV WANTS POINTS FOR DOING SA REP, THEN IM GONNA TAKE EVERYTHING SUPER SERIOUSLY"

The difference between us is that I was sexually abused, and trafficked(not sex trafficked but still) so when I watch this show, I IMMEDIATELY pick up on things happening there. While he doesn't because he's """normal"""" and not traumatized, so he just sees fun dick joke show about dick and balls. I think a lot of this fandom is a mix of both. People like me picking up on signs, and other people who just are here for jokes and don't necessarily notice all the really bad shit because thats not exactly their lived experience. Completely understandable, I don't hold it against anyone for not noticing it the way I do. But I do see it, and wanna bitch about it.

We're in hell. This show is set in the actual human bible hell damnation hell for hell people. I think there's a way to read some characters as "uwu babies", but I'm not gonna. It's hell. In hell. I'm going to be giving no one the benefit of the doubt, and assume the worst in people until proven otherwise. Especially when the characters in question are dickbags who never actually change.

What Stolas is doing is...sexual harassment? Is that better??? Stolas is openly engaging in pretty intense kinkplay around his daughter and that is in fact, Bad.

(its also entirety possible Octavia knows that this dynamic is sexually violent and is forced to listen to her dad want to rape a guy, and no dont come telling me thats wrong too, fuck off.)

And as someone who's been through the exact same kind of trauma as Octavia, I can say it definitely fucked me up✨ The only thing I'll give Stolas is that it doesn't seem like he's been doing this around her since she was a small child like I was, but its still bad. That's still inappropriate behavior, that's still something he should know to stop immediately when he sees she's around. Octavia is a depressed, struggling teenager who needs love and support while dealing with this sudden divorce. Stolas spends EVERY episode that is supposed to be about them, either tryna fuck Blitz in front of her, or ignoring her to interact with Blitz and or yell at Stella.

Stolas' problem as a character(not a bad thing, this should be a story/character arc) is that he's deeply entitled, and doesn't see how is actions effect others. Stolas is upset that he was forced into marriage? Wow, isn't Stella such a bitch for doing that too him? No empathy for the woman also being raped and abused through this forced marriage. Stolas is gay and wants to fuck? Let's not think about the class difference, and that he's literally holding Blitz' survival in his hands in exchange for cock. Stolas wants the sexual experiences he was robbed of because of his trauma? Who cares if it destroys his family and makes his daughter feel worthless, he wants to sext. His arc should be about facing the fact that he's abusive, and hurtful. He is hurting Blitz, and Octavia with his sexual behavior. But if he was supposed to be a "good" character with "good intentions", then he should have no problem apologizing and ACTUALLY changing. Stolas doesn't seem upset that they're upset, he's upset he got "caught". He's upset Blitz demands respect and doesn't suck his dick the second he shows any remorse. He's upset that he can't fight Stella and fuck all he wants and instead has to deal with his moody teenager ACTUALLY needing attention and support. My comment about "the entire series" is because the only things we see are the bad parts of their relationship with no development, even if its only a few episodes.

Also since we're playing the virtue game, saying "but he didn't do it on purpose" is actual victim blaming and rapist apologist behavior so like, good job?? Saying rape or sexual abuse isn't as big of a deal just because it was an accident, or unintentional is definitely a take to have. Now, I'd say this is a stupid furry series that doesn't matter in the long run, but you're the one whining about language??

Anyway. Hazbin/Helluva are poorly made shows that annoy me. Pls stop fucking with people about shit like "softening" language and all that "real victims" and all that purity culture savior complex bullshit. Its super weird. Rambling times over, its like 5am im going back to sleep. Also I'm proship, this is media analysis not a moral thing except for the part where I was fucked with over language.

[bonefall]

What was Leopardstar and Carpwhisker’s relationship like?

You know how in Fire Emblem Awakening how there's that side character whose entire existence is dedicated to a running joke that he's the biggest person in the room... but no one sees him, ever? To the point where they even end up thinking an extra goblet at dinner must belong to a ghost?

Face obscured by Chrom's knee on the box art, Mike Wazowski magazine style?

Carpwhisker.

I'm GUTTING Leopardstar's Haggis. It is in the bottom 5 WC entries for me. Leopardstar's childhood bullying was cheap and brainless. How fucking dare they, actually?

How dare they take their ONE confident, intimidating female character, DEFINED by how she was beloved in RiverClan and by her apprentice generation, had no romance, and wasn't a mother figure, and fuck up ALL THREE THINGS???

So. Anyway.

If anyone gets bullied it's Carpwhisker, still by Skyheart.

Brightsky didn't die; she became a kittypet. There were four kits.

Carp, Oat, Leopard, Water.

Mudfur took Carp and Leopard home, due to their resemblance to their famous ancestor, Volestar.

If Mudfur knew what Leopardstar would become... he would have left her there, with her mother. He regrets bringing her back to RiverClan

He feels he should have known better. He became a Cleric shortly after returning because he came to believe that the constant fighting was wrong, and yet...

What did he expect?

Carpwhisker is a nervous wreck who can't stand up for herself despite being as big as a badger, and Leopardstar eventually booked herself a rock appointment

I feel like at some point, Carpwhisker learned the secret about Brightsky... but keeps it to herself.

She can't imagine Leopardstar taking it well, "and um, she's..." (Carpwhisker grasps for words not wanting to outright say she's terrified of her) "...she's a wee bit intense about bad news."

You know that one post about the kid who got severely bullied in school, the teacher put on Dumbo, and they watched every single one of their bullies cheer for the underdog? All the bullies think they're Dumbo.

That's poor Carp. I feel like she used to really like Aftergatherings until Leopardstar told her about the reputation of those events, and that attending them was making Carp look disloyal.

People often take credit for her achievements. She was the one who made the Bonehill practical-- it's not solid bone, it's a mud facade with a layer of bone around it. Tigerstar said it was TigerClan's achievement, and his by proxy.

When Carpwhisker was struggling for breath to correct him, Leopardstar gave her a sideways glance and killed the thought.

So, Carp's relationship with Leopardstar is not great. But Carp defends her, and loves her, and insist she knows best.

Leopardstar is a better friend of Skyheart than she is a sister of Carp. Leopard's beloved by that whole group, and a natural leader from a young age.

I think when Leopardstar dies, Carp is distraught by it. Inconsolable, and it's really hard to tell her in that moment that it sounds like she's a lot better off without her.

She'd probably end up hanging out with Mothwing a lot, seeking spiritual advice. Moth just gives her normal, mortal, nonspiritual advice, but Carpwhisker thinks it's divine.

After all... they both did just lose very toxic siblings that they still loved very much, and are kinda working through that.

In terms of politics, Carpwhisker is a weak-traditionalist. Really, she just goes along with what's popular at the moment, and doesn't make waves. She's conflict-avoidant, and just tries to make others happy with her hard work.

Most of all she just wants peace, really. What if there were no problems forever and everyone was just nice and well-fed and we all took a big nap in this warm den I made. What then.

SO all that to say... She loved Leopardstar. Leopardstar was awful to her. "We're sisters! It's just like that!" (It Is Not Like That.) She was hidden in her shadow. She thought the shadow was normal. She's destroyed when her sister dies. She can only begin to recover once she's gone.

[s0fter-sin]

ghost having absolutely no self esteem until he joins the military and pinning his self-worth on his performance in the field, seeing his only value as a weapon which only gets worse when he’s legally dead and all but owned by the military makes me want to eat glass