#last week at my toxic job
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heh.
#a little drinkie and cackling like a mad woman#being so bad tonight#last week at my toxic job#left work an hour and 15 min early and boss texted me#‘did you clock out? it’s not even 4’#what’re you going to do#fire me??? lmao BINCH#young ones do not listen to me I’m a bad example#but also#fuck the system and friendship is magic#okay good night love u all mwuah
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A very glazed page 39
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#my art#fnaf#fnaf au#five nights at freddy's#fnaf security breach#fnaf gregory#evan afton#crying child#michael afton#glamrock freddy#fnaf 4#fnaf comic#into the ballpit au#oh my god this page was so curseddddd yallllllllll#started it when a tornado hit I lost my house for a week#had to quit a toxic job that got worse the last weeks I stayed#had to organize my life better#and finally had to start taking anxiety medication because it was too much#I actually slept without a panic attack last night#I’m so happy… I’m just gonna -melts onto the floor-#it’s fine now#yay
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hey im sorry to ask for help again, i just dont know what else to do right now. im starting my new job today (just onboarding for now but im finding out my new schedule today and i'll be starting next week) and my bank account is currently at -23, i just had to pay my phone bill so that put me at -78. if anyone has anything to spare so i can get out of this hole itd be greatly appreciated 🙏 as soon as my new job starts i'll be able to get on track fairly quickly but my boss completely screwed me over with scheduling for my last few weeks of work, idk what im gonna do
pp: paypal.me/bewearrr
vnm: tobias_leviathan
thank you 💕 of course plz only help if you can afford to
#im trying not to be angry about my schedule but its hard not to when i need to work to live and my boss doesnt give a fuck#good thing this is my last week!!!!!! that was maybe one of the most toxic environments ive experienced at a job in years.#toxic in a way im not used to or experienced before#and now my finances are going to be in shambles for months bc my boss wanted to be petty. thats literally all this is#i hate the world. i still have bills to pay and im on the verge of getting my bank account closed bc it keeps getting overdrafted#idk what im gonna do. trying not to freak out its too early for a freakout but uuuuuuggggggghhhhhhhhh
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HATE THIS PLACE
#had another coworker walk out so now i have to do two peoples jobs#i have one of my coworkers helping me but she has been having to help me all last week since they fucked up our kitchen hours#like dont get me wrong its a TOXIC work place so at the end of the day corporate only has themselves to blame but MAN#i hate getting fucked over time and time again like this#but i make $15/hr and in a week or two i'll be at $17.25/hr#my rent is cheap although it will be going up in february. there are no other jobs nearby that will hire me and pay rent in one check#HEY AT LEAST MY BINDER CAME IN TODAY. i think its just slightly big on me but eh i'll save up for another bc#im not doing an international return
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(( I just want to say that I live! I want to watch the newest arc soon and hopefully get some Charles muse back again cause I love this little fuck face, life has just been throwing hardball after hardball at me so I've hardly had time for myself. ))
#my 11 year old baby kitty died last month#my grandma that i have a really good relationship with just went on hospice and likely won't make it through August#i changed jobs and am now a vet tech#went from toxic job to even more toxic job#tried getting out and had a few promising interviews but didn't land any#i don't get enough hours or pay so fuck me#trying to get some passive income stuff going#my oldest hedgie also tried to die a week after my cat#but she pulled through thank god#had to get put on another anxiety med#out of tea#psa#also insomnia is a bitch#honestly its my friends here and irl that have been getting me through these times#but i do hope to make a come back here soonish#the mun
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People find out about shit I’ve put up with in the past and are like “how did you not punch this person omg” and I just need to explain one thing to you about me. I can store up things indefinitely if I have to. I am capable of rational thought in even the most insane of circumstances and if I decide it’ll be infinitely more satisfying to get back at someone at a later date when I’m more coherent than to yell at them now, by God I’ll do it
#this post brought to you by my stepdad asking ‘how did you not rip him [friend’s ex] a new one’#because i knew it wouldn’t have done any good. i knew she’d have sided with him over me and i wanted a front row seat to his downfall#and now; 4 and a half years later; i’m about to have it. it’s called playing the long game#back in 2020 he was playing checkers and i was fucking terraforming the earth okay#i have the level of self control and patience you only see in people who have been masking their entire life#and also spent their teenage years repressing homosexuality#(yes i did do both of those things)#it’s also the fact i have a tendency to stutter and cry when i get in arguments and i hate it because it ALWAYS leads to me losing no matter#how good my points were#not to be all ‘i have a long fuse but it’s attached to dynamite blah blah blah’ but i mean.#so instead of arguing back i just store up whatever the person did so i can do something psychotic to them later#is it toxic? probably. do i care? no#my dad was also a master of this. if anyone cares#i just think why get in a fistfight when i could help someone sue you#a black eye lasts what? a week? legal costs take a fucking long time and a lot of work to pay off. just saying#don’t piss off people with good memories who treat holding a grudge more seriously than their actual job#personal
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last day of work today! and then it's full time girlboss school for me
#i'm sad :( i liked this job a lot#it feels so different from leaving my previous job which i hated and was sooo toxic#but it really has been so good for me i'm so fucking glad i did this even for 6 months#proved to myself i'm actually really good at what i do and everyone who told me i couldnt do it at my last job was WRONG#anyway. two and a half weeks off and then 🥴🥴 school#it's gonna be so much work . someone remind me why i wanted to do it#it'll be interesting to see how my use of this site changes.... i fear i may disappear#bella things
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I wonder if I laid out in the sun topless, if my rings would heat up evenly through, and I’d feel it on the inside…
#me#peachy thoughts#I got a 10ft inflatable pool and it’s the best decision that I’ve made in a long time#and I quit my toxic job last week#it’s even better than that
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i know people need to work and have jobs for society to function but i should be exempt from that bc i don't wanna do work..........food for thought
#my toxic trait is i am so lazy and i will never outgrow it i truly believe i am the specialist girl in the world and should not have to work#i truly cant envision a future where i dont want to kms if im working 40 hours a week 😌❤️#if i could survive and support myself only working part time then i would do that#and probably wouldn't feel like my soul was being drained from my body#but otherwise.....#maybe its just bc my last job sucked soooo bad maybe a job that doesn't suck so so bad would be ok idk#but that was my only full time job and i wanted to die#and i kind of feel like it would be the same even if it wasn't backbreaking manual labor but maybe im wrong#but most importantly I AM LAZY#im also disabled and chronically fatigued but on top of that i actually truly am lazy#there's no point to this post im just complaining#there should be a charity fund that supports lazy girls not working#we deserve it#this has been a shitpost
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#I swear if (1) more person asks me how recovery is going or how i am#i will literally fucking lose it oh my god#i have literally burst into tears so many times this week and last because the thought of going back to work?#especially to a job I don't like any more??? and one with a toxic environment???#and a commute that is finally starting to take a toll on me??#is literally making me so anxious and driving me absolutely insane#there's only so much i can handle and i think i've finally hit my breaking point#i finally cleaned up my resume & have applied to three different jobs so far#and applied to school & just waiting for the actual program application period to begin#god i fucking hope i get in i'm so done with being a fucking lvn since there's like no opportunities to do other things#i'm just so... tired and emotional#i need to be held#literally cried while typing this 🤪#sierra speaks#tbd
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mills back in employment era
#mills talks#txted#THE PROCESS WAS SO NERVE WRACKING MY FIRST INTERVIEW WAS 2 WEEKS AGO#trying to stay realistic and not get overly excited bc my last job turned into a toxic nightmare but this place seems more serious at least
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this place makes me want to kill myself
#things have been.... incredibly hard on my job#like. harder than it ever was#I don't even have it in me to talk about it because I don't wanna relive it#but that one coworker who hates me just brought it up again to make it worse#and I did SO good on keeping my cool and simply not caring when it happened earlier this week#I guess she saw that and couldn't let me be at peace with something for once#she realized I didn't suffer enough from the situation and decided to give me one last blow about it#which is just bizarre. I wish everyone here would stop acting like children#god I just wanna get out of here so bad#this place makes me want to throw up#I never want to work in an office job again#it's just fucking ruined for me#if I don't pass the latam dynamic I'm just gonna go back to job hunting for grocery store jobs or something#I can't believe this place was so toxic it made me give up my entire plan b career path#rambles*
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if your best friend said some really hurtful and mean stuff in the name of ‘honesty’ (unasked for) and you stepped back from the conversation: who should break the ice first?
or it’s not a case of ‘who should’, but is it even worth it at this point? we’ve never gone this long without speaking to one another in our 15 years of friendship. she has recently gone through some tough times and i understand how that factors into her lashing out at me, but it’s been a week now of silence. it hurts to think that she’s sitting at home feeling right and secure in her cruel statements towards me instead of any slight sort of remorse. i don’t know if that’s a friendship worth keeping any longer.
#i got fired from my one job last month and found out last week that my other job will be closing at the end of may#i didn't turn into chicken little aka panic and act like the sky is falling as a result and she took great offense to that lol#she insulted my boyfriend lmfao#and was like 'sorry i don't take you to ikea like he does or talk to you about kpop instead of the real issues going on in our lives'#like w h a t#she implied that the boss at the job i got fired from will sabotage any future job opportunities when he literally#was a labor rights activist prior to this job lmfao#i'm mostly sad imagining her at home with her toxic narcissistic husband who hates me#and what he's saying and how they're probably making fun of me together#i know thats my mental illness speaking to some degree (at least the making fun of part)#i know he hates me. i hate him.#but the difference is i've kept my mouth shut and didn't word vomit in the name of 'brutal honesty' bc????#who fucking knows
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Mmm nothing like a good old full blown panic attack, I haven't had one in years. This time at least I have access to medication to make it stop a lot faster, but I have 6 pills left for the next 2,5 months and the recent trends in my mental state are not looking good.
#majek says shit#very bad year and VERY BAD week#had a new friend over for a few days and they had and encounter with an absolute bed bug infestation a couple days earlier#took all precautions they could and were very serious about the whole thing but were paranoid#something bit my bf on the knee literally the day after she left and we're in overdrive now#I say it's a mosquito because that night there was one in the house that I couldn't cath#but he says thats not how his body reacts to mosquitoes. I'm keeping myself in denial to preserve the little mental health I have left#my body decided that the stress will manifest as itchy hives which is great#we moved everything to my room and I'm going insane#I need my own space to live with someone and we even slept separately for like 2 years because it's better for sleep quality#and now we sleep together which is pretty nice and nicer than I remembered but also I have literally no space mental or physical#I'm unemployed and he works from home#we moved the tv to watch movies in bed and everything is taking so much physical space. my personal space#the house is a mess and my life is a mess and everything seems hopeless#I'm having... anxiety attacks? first once a week now every day. I always thought they were like milder panic attacks#they kinda are. as in they are shorter. and actually about something not the undescribed “watch out!”#but severity is like a panic attack was compressed into a few seconds which feel like I'm standing on the edge of a void pulling me in#it's physical. I have to physically hold on to something or move my body vigorously as if I'm shuffling away#and it lasts literally seconds and I'm fine-ish#my psychiatrist heard about it happening once a week and wrote me a prescription (?) to go to psychiatric hospital#not to stay there but for intensive 5-6h daily three month therapy#and after that visit I started having these attacks daily I think because it got to me that I'm Not Ok#it all started when I started on my new antidepressants and they are helping... but I'm afraid they are breaking something else...#I'm scared that they are#but so much is happening#unemployed for a year. my industry is going to shit. lost my friend who made sure to give me a big package of toxic waste as a farewell gift#so I have no support from anyone who even remotely understands me#unemployment means rejection over and over because I'm trying...#and this week exhausted me socially on top of everything. and the bed bugs threat. it's good I at least have xanax when it gets like today#oh also I'm turning 30 in a month. this is going to be great for job opportunities I can feel it
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:-)
#one thing abt vacation is that u get used to constantly being around people and then being alone becomes very sad#i traveled with a squad of like 5 people and literally was NEVER by myself (except to use the bathroom) from thursday night to sunday night#and the trip was REALLY FUN and i fucking LOVE MY FRIENDS and had basically the perfectest most beautiful dream vacation ever but like#god DAMN am i bored as hell now#also sleeping next to somebody for like 4 nights in a row can kinda mess u up when u have to go back to ur own place#the friend that i roomed with & i do sleepovers most weekends and that’s good and fine#but obviously we’ve never spent that much time together and idk it was really nice to constantly have someone to talk to#and kinda helped get the day rolling since my brain always feels like toxic sludge when i wake up no matter how much sleep i get#i miss being stimulated too#we were constantly Doing An Activity or in reprieve as we planned our next Activity and now it is just#back to waking up for a job i don't love at ungodly stupid hours and biding the time till my next nap#boring!!!!!!!!!!#also i wish money wasn’t real 💔#my fav band is playing a show in chicago and is incindentally opening for HER favorite band and that is like#insane coincidence that they would play the same show (for only 25 dollars no less!!!!!)#i am trying to get her to agree to go with me but#between the DC trip we just took last week#and the seattle one we are taking in sept#it would be so stupid to go to chicago for no reason to catch a one (1) day show in august#which like. i hate to say this but i wish she wasn’t so fisically responsible LOL#she makes Way more money than i do and has been working for at least 1.5 years longer than i have so that’s#quite a bit of savings that she probably has#i know she can Afford it because even i can afford it if i move money around correctly#she just SAYS she can’t because she is being responsible and saving for the future and not wanting to go over her budget to which i say BOO#jkjk insert the obligatory ''that is very responsible and smart of her'' here#im also in a unique situation where all my flights are practically free bc i do be running up these numbers as hell on my AA credit card#(that i do pay off!!!!!)#i know most people actually have to track flights and stuff#STILL THOUGH!!!!! ugh i’m just fiending for my next brain burst i suppose
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man nobody tells you how much it sucks to put in a resignation letter
#like you’re telling me that i have to submit a notice of when my last day is gonna be#and then just go back to whatever it is im supposed to be doing like nothing happened#and everyone is supposed to be cool about it#i had more anxiety about submitting my notice than i do about actually starting the new job#maybe that means my current job is more toxic than i thought??? idk#at least at the end of next week i wont have to worry about it anymore#mine
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