50% sadness 50% candy and that's it that's basically what i am welcome 2 my blog <3 (men dni)
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#posts like this give me so much envy#and what if EYE wanted to be this college professor (and still do)
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hmmmmm
#i will say though that part of getting off work at 5 pm is like#the itches and tingles i have#i go stir crazy sitting around my empty apartment alone and i’m not sure what i’m wanting but i’m wanting SOMETHING and it is weirdly#difficult to figure out what i am seeking and it all feels odd and idk#this is kinda why i used to stretch work all day just so i could#avoid this feeling#it’s gonna take some#getting used to
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ummmmmmm
#rare moment of positivity i love my life so much i’m so so happy i could burst with it#i love my boyfriend so much i feel stupid and sick with it (pos)#work is going really good i keep actually wrapping up at 5 pm when i’m supposed to#bc i changed managers and also roles slightly#and my new stuff is a lot more project and people management and that stuff sort of HAS to be done during the hours of 9-5#no longer can i leisurely coast through the day and stretch the workday to 10 pm lol#i have crazy amounts of free time now which i’m still getting used to and it feels sort of absurd to not have the anvil hanging over my#head all the time#idk what to do w all this free time but bf turned me into a gamer (lol) and i beat an insanely hard level today n am feeling super proud of#myself 🥰#however i am experiencing 1 bad thing and that is my acne has exploded again so badly it almost looks pre accutane#luckily no skin thickening or cracking or bleeding#like it’s still fairly smooth and the texture isn’t fucking up in that way but god fucking DAMN i am red and BUMPY#its like everytime i go visit houston i die#*i come back with more whiteheads and bumps and flares it is truly#horrid#i be having rosacea related meltdowns on the daily i scared to go outside without makeup on i hate it here#but other than that!!!!!!!!!!#life good it good#:)
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:’)
#life is cool and good i’m so happyyyyyyyy!!!!!!!!!!!!!#i’m so in love i’m the luckiest girl in the world and also i get to see tinashe tomorrow like everything is so fucking cool :)#been seeing my bf for nearly 11 months now and the only times he’s ever made me cry is when one of us goes out of town and i think about#how much i’ll miss him#like that’s so!!!!!#idk! i love him so much it’s truly crazy he treats me so good i’d die and kill for him#i’m big simping rn i’m just listening to his old voicemails and lying in my bed smiling#being in love is so cool :)#alhamdulillah
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oh also i don’t have strep throat yay :)
#just a stupid little throat infection#taking my little medicines and iA i’ll b fine soon….. huge :)
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🙄
#god i hate that this blog has devolved into the boyfriend chronicles it feels so stupid but this is the last social media i have that my#IRL friends are not on#idk i hate talking their ear off about whatever this is but also if i don’t process out my feelinfs i will die so i have to do it here#sorry folks#annoying for me too i promise
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:(
#had to cancel plans and started crying i’m being such a fucking baby about this lol#i miss him!!!!!!!!!!!!!! who cares being in love is super cool
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i think i have strep throat????
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:)
#i doubt anyone reads these (actually if they did i’d be deeply embarrassed) but good news#relationships are stabilizing i was truly tweaking for no reason#spent a whole weekend alone did a refresh and i’m back to feeling normal and enjoying the company of my loved ones lol#boyfriend made me dinner while i lied on the floor and complained about the uterus agonies and i have received a lot of forehead kisses#everything is normalizing………#i am having an insanely#emotional period and constantly crying about random scenarios i work myself up to but oddly enough i can see through all that and i know#it’s not really ‘real’#in the content normal moments i have with my brain im like yeah life is cool n good again#hehee#it’s sick how fucking sprung i am actually like i constantly have to resist sending him long essay texts everytime we hang out about how#much fun i had and how much i love him#he takes crazy good care of me i almsot#feel bad#i used to be little miss independent and now i’m like no i’m just baby >:(#he drives me places and does the cooking and does the emotional#support and i’m like#wow thank you!!!! your reward is you get to unlock more tragic backstory and now console me over new breakdowns i’ve been hiding from you!!#im high maintenance i fink
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me: sitting here drawing a bunch
my left hand: ow. ow. ow. i hurt.
me: you're. not even the hand i'm drawing with. you're just chilling. what is your fucking problem.
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