#king. i love you. and these musicals are about being gay
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Ok. As a Greek mythology nerd I need to tell you what the Greek gods are because I have a fondness for them and a compulsive need to correct people. 
Zeus: big guy, “father” and king of the Greek pantheon. He married his sister(Hera) and cheats on her with his other sister and a whole host of women. His domain was the sky and he wields lightning and storms
Hera: “mother” of the Greek pantheon. Married Zeus, and becomes jealous bitch in a lot of myths because of his cheating. Mostly it’s misogyny, but sometimes she is kind of a shitty person. Goddess of marriage, and being a wife and mother. Not really a goddess of childbirth or pregnancy(that was her daughter).
Poseidon: god of the ocean, earthquakes, storms, and generally water. I have a fondness for him cause I read Percy Jackson, but he is a jackass. He’s not as bad as Zeus, but he is the Middle Kid stereotype of all Middle Kid stereotypes. He has temper tantrums and holds WAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYY too many grudges. Just so many grudges. He’s not a super big main character in myths. But he has a rivalry with Athena
Demeter: goddess of grain/plants/farming. She’s mostly a crop farming goddess and general agriculture. She is kind of a BAMF, not gonna lie, and she has a couple really good myths where she has fucked shit up for people who were being shit heads. She had a daughter with Zeus(her brother) who is also kinda famous, but for reasons other than being related to Zeus and Demeter. Is not married, does not have sex, is one of several virginal goddesses(virginal means abstains from all sex in this context)
Hades: god of the dead (NOT GOD OF DEATH!!! THAT IS A DIFFERENT PERSON). He’s kinda the “accountant” of Greek afterlife. He doesn’t reap any souls, but he makes sure that all the dead people go to all the right places and he rules over his kingdom pretty peacefully. Keeps to himself, usually the black sheep. Often framed as the villain, but he’s actually pretty chill. Keeps to himself, likes the dark, doesn’t really interact with anyone but his wife, his kids, and his dog. Cause drama like once and then he goes back to being chill and slightly threatening. We love him
Hestia: no one ever talks about her, but she is goddess of the hearth, and the home. She is pretty chill too, fave up her seat on the counsel of the twelve gods for Dionysius and now tends the god’s hearth in the middle of Olympus and has first say on all collective sacrifices. She’s the chillest of any god anywhere and I will hear no shit about her. One of several virginal goddesses(virginal means abstains from all sex in this context)
^^main 6 gods and goddesses
Rest of Greek pantheon:
Apollo: sun god, but also god of archery, music, disease and medicine, and (bad) poetry. He’s one of a few twin gods and he’s the son of Zeus. He’s a bit of a little shit and a playboy, and many of his romances don’t pan out in the myths. Gay as all hell. Pretty funny. Makes QUESTIONABLE decisions
Artemis: moon goddess, and goddess of the hunt(both literally hunting but also a group of lesbians and aroace women who hunt in the woods for their entire lives after joining. They give up all men, and all contact to the outside world. Sounds like a shit ton of fun ngl). She is twins with Apollo and often hunts with him. She’s pretty chill. Will kick your ass if you sexually harass/assault/rape anyone. Another BAMF.
Athena: goddess of wisdom, war strategy, and crafts. Pretty much goddess of being smart/intelligent. She is hot headed tho, and she can be kinda a bitch. We love her tho. She’s great. She is besties with Odysseus and hates HATES Poseidon. She is famous for a couple myths that have been twisted to frame her as an unreasonable bitch (Arachne, Medusa and Perseus, etc), but in most of the originals she is actually a pretty decent person. She is too a BAMF. one of several virginal goddesses(virginal means abstains from all sex in this context)
Dionysius: god of wine and madness. Occasionally turns jackasses into dolphins, churns women into a frenzy and has multiple orgies. He’s like your one uncle who is literally always drunk or high and had serious game when he was younger (tbh he always and forever will have serious game). Pretty chill. Also seriously fucking gay. Like all Greek gods and goddesses are gay, but there are some that are gayer than others (literally hand carved a dildo so that he could fulfil a promise to a dead guy, when he really didn’t have to)
Aphrodite: goddess of love and beauty, often fetishised and not really treated as a person. Sometimes a bitch, but I think it’s mostly because she’s only really seen as a beautiful entity and not a real person. Had a fling/situationship with Ares and eventually marries Hephaestus. I believe that she and Hephaestus fell in love, but many myths take the approach that she cheated on Hephaestus a bunch and their marriage was shitty. I like the love one better, but that’s just me. She is actually really cool cause she’s a really curvy woman and is like insanely beautiful and I’m like really gay about it.
Ares: god of war, kind of a shit. He’s just got anger issues and misogyny as sort of inherent to his character. He’s fine, but is fuelled by his anger like 100% of the time.
Hephaestus: god of metallurgy and crafting weapons. He’s like the god of engineers and computer science. He’s pretty cool. He’s like the only disability rep in the whole pantheon(I could be persuaded on this point tho. I could see Hades also being physically disabled). He was tossed off a mountain by his mother Hera when he was a kid and so has a lot of issues both mommy and medical. He makes the weaponry for the gods alongside his cyclops assistants. He IS NOT the god of fire, though he does use it. We love him. He’s nifty.
Hermes: messenger god. He’s like a mailman. He’s also the god of thieves, travellers, spies, vagabonds, etc. he’s pretty cool. He has magic shoes that let him fly and his wand thing is used as the symbol for medicine. He’s chill we like him. He’s pretty cheeky tho. He’s also unofficially the god of pranks.
Not all of the gods, just the big 13. I can tell yall about the rest of them but that would require a whole other post.
TLDR: I’m a Greek mythology nerd, and I geeked out
this website’s easy watch. *dangles a bunch of greek gods like keys*
#ancient greek#greek mythology#greek gods#greek pantheon#greek myth retellings#geek#and a history nerd#im a nerd#nerdy girls#nerd talks
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also i think often about the fact that into the woods was written by gay men in 1987 and is some of the very best writing on grief ever
#sondheim always denied that into the woods was an hiv/aids allegory#but writers are often wrong about what they write about#stephen sondheim in particular was always like ‘nooooo my musicals that are very obviously about being gay aren’t about being gay’#man was like ‘somewhere from west side story isn’t about being gay’#king. i love you. and these musicals are about being gay#sometimes people leave you. halfway through the woods. do not let it grieve you. no one leaves for good.#OH ALSO. ANY MOMENT / MOMENTS IN THE WOODS#i need to write a whole thing on that i need to sort out my takes but#she fucks a stranger. she feels morally complicated about it and also she feels unsatisfied with monogamy. she rationalizes.#then she IS IMMEDIATELY KILLED BY A STRANGE UNSEEN THREAT SO MUCH LARGER THAN HERSELF#I MEAN COME ON.#MR. SONDHEIM.
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i’m scared and i’m angry and i’m alone and i’m just. everyone has their shit together but me! look i’m sorry. i’m sorry.
#some of you haven’t watched braden le masters (of WALLOWS fame) deliver the performance of a lifetime in a shitty made-for-phone tv series#where he is a bully to a girl who will become his step sister and is dating his best friend who he has a closeted gay crush on#and is a music snob and a film nerd and also trying to save his friends from being hunted down by an online serial killer named king cobra.#and then the season ends where the killer finds out about his LITTLE SISTER and ends on a cliffhanger. and gets cancelled so we’ll never kn#some of you just haven’t lived through that and it SHOWS (it’s on netflix right now. put it on)#oh and the guy he has a crush on is lukas gage. and noah centineo appears along w the worst acting by youtube stars but it is WORTH IT#for brandon and trevor and rowan i promise. the most toxic of one sided love triangles it’s the worst and best thing i’ve ever seen
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Robin as the polyglot she is definitely has picked up at least some sign language. And because he and Steve are thick as thieves she's taught Steve some signs, one of them being the sign for "I love you".
This would've just been a way for the two to communicate even more without saying a single word together if not for Eddie.
Eddie, who unfortunately mixed up the hand sign people do for rock and roll with the actual hand sign for "I love you". After all, it's really only the difference of a single thumb.
What this means though is that everytime Eddie says goodbye to Steve he uses what he believes to be the sign for rock and roll. And every single time, Steve blushes bright red. He's almost 96% positive that Eddie isn't actually telling him he loves him, but he doesn't know that for sure and he's never really had another guy tell him he loves him before. Especially not every time he sees him.
Eddie on the other hand has no idea of the mistake he's making. All he knows is that Steve blushes a lot around him, and he comes to incorrect conclusion that Steve the Hair Harrington, might have a crush on him, and Eddie King-of-the-freaks gay-in-small-town-America Munson, runs with it.
Soon enough he's absolutely shamelessly flirting with Steve. Just being absolutely blatant about it, to the extent that Steve's 96% starts turning into 86, 65, 52, then eventually he's more sure that Eddie is actually telling him he loves him than he is that he's not.
In classic Steve fashion he figures he might as well shoot his shot so the next time Eddie goes to leave his house after a night of smoking and playfully sniping about each other's musical opinions Eddie makes his customary rock and roll goodbye sign and Steve just pulls him down and crashes his mouth to his.
"I love you too," he gets out between pants when he finally pulls away from Eddie.
Eddie, not really actually expecting Steve to reciprocate, at least not before he'd finished his 87 step plan to woo him, can only open his mouth several times trying to process the fact that Steve kissed him before what Steve said to him catches up to his brain.
".....what?" he finally says.
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Let me know if you guys want me to finish this! It honestly was just a simple thought brought about from the fact that I didn't realize every time I'd thought I'd been making the rock and roll sign I'd actually been telling random people I loved them.
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Hi! I started listening to Chappell Roan after seeing a post about her on your blog, and now I'm obsessed. Could you please give me some more music recommendations? Thanks!!!
god I love this. no further specifications, just carte blanche to go hogwild and recommend anything.
you didn't even ask for any structure but I'm nothing if not constantly looking for an excuse to be extra, so I've provided one tangentially thematically related recommendation for almost song on Midwest Princess (not all of them, tumblr won't let me do more than ten audio links booo)
Femininomenon 🏍️
listen, girlies: we're NEVER going to have a femininomenon if we can't even stop talking about these mediocre boys. move along! forget about them!
Red Wine Supernova 🍷
the theme is being so horny it changes how your brain is wired.
After Midnight 💃
mom doesn't like you wearing that dress and red lipstick and dad doesn't like you bleaching your hair, but what if you just had fun?
Casual 🧜🏽♀️
so, you've escaped an unbearable situationship.
Super Graphic Ultra Modern Girl 🛸
this is a song for the guy with the fugly jeans who didn't ask you a single question and won't dance
HOT TO GO! 🍟
I'd like to think serpentwithfeet is getting closer than those damn gloves in the same club where Chappell is trying to get to hot hands on her body. gay hands cinematic universe.
My Kink Is Karma 😈
is sitting back watching them ruin their own life not enough anymore? get proactive!
Kaleidoscope ✨
so. the relationship got Weird and now nothing will ever be the same :/
Pink Pony Club 🐎
the queer country king himself. incidentally I would KILL for Orville Peck to cover Pink Pony Club.
Guilty Pleasure 🚬
Chappell said we could go to hell but we'll probably be fine; Rina said this hell is better with you. songs for queer girlies who aren't scared of the devil, you know what I mean?
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this love | chapter one [h.c]
summary: your prince suitors have been driving you insane. after a scene you make at a ball, the king and queen have decided to put their foot down and have a knight look after you. knight meets princess. princess has conflicting thoughts about knight.
pairing: hazel callahan x fem!reader
contains: isabel being the sweetest girl, lonely princess who is misunderstood, knight!hazel, charming!hazel, king and queen are not the best and it won’t get better from here ://, hazel is readers gay awakening (real.), no y/n!
word count: 4.7K
a/n: everything will kind of start next chapter with hazel and reader’s beginning dynamic. this is just introducing how shitty the reader is treated and the royals beliefs.
The royal life.
The poor desired what came with royalty. Wealth, status, comfortability, security, love, and even. Whatever that may be. You envied those who weren’t a part of this life.
The corset underneath your, while stunning, uncomfortable gown suffocated you while you danced with yet another new suitor who had traveled across the seas to Rockridge Palace. Prince Jeffery Williams had been the sixth — hopefully final— prince to attend yet another one of these balls that the king and queen insisted they throw for you and your suitor to get to know one another.
Prince Jeffrey would not stop talking about himself as you slow danced and it was driving you up the wall. He was somehow incredibly louder in volume than the live orchestra.
On top of his ability to talk about all of his successes, which you were sure were entirely made up, he had wandering eyes… and hands. You shouldn’t have had to move his hands from below your hip back up to your waist as many times as you did.
After the third time and disgustingly cocky smirk, you had enough. Out of impulse, you raised your foot to slam it down onto his boot-covered one. Jeffrey let out a squeal that made you smile to yourself but quickly put on a feigned expression.
“Oh dear, Prince Jeffrey. I-I must have two left feet.” You place a hand over your heart, gasping as if you didn’t deliberately harm him.
Prince Jeffrey folded over to hold onto his now throbbing foot, face turning a beat red as he forced out a chuckle. Every other maiden and man that surrounded you both had stopped their dancing to stare and gape at the scene.
“I feel faint. I must go lie down.” Prince Jeffrey excused himself, smoothing down the front of his deep navy blue tailcoat. “Until we meet again, Princess.”
“Until then.” You bow with the fakest of smiles before clearing your throat.
Jeffrey scurried away to his guest room in the palace, his own personal guard following right behind. The music resumed, much louder than before as you locked eyes with your mother from across the grand room conversing with Jeffrey's mother.
You could feel her anger radiating through her heavy breathing and sudden excusing herself from the queen of Jeffrey’s kingdom. Other townspeople moved themselves out of the way as your mother swiftly made her way towards you.
There was a slight chance you may have gone a tad far with the aggression.
“Oh, sweet pea,” your mother sing-songs as she approaches you, hands folded elegantly in front of her torso, “Is it time for bed then?”
You knew there was a hint of anger laced in her sickenly sweet words. It wasn’t to fool you, though, but the surrounding guests. There was no fighting her, at least, at that very moment.
“Mother, I do feel quite drowsy. Would it be alright to head to bed?” You plaster on the same faux smile, sucking in a deep breath.
“I would highly suggest it. Now, go on then. I must tell these disappointed guests that the ball must come to an end.” Her smile unknowingly dropped as she ended her sentence.
You nod your heavy head, turning on your heels to make your way out of the grand ballroom to your bedroom. As you keep your head down to avoid the wandering eyes and whispers of: ‘Where’s the princess going?’ and ‘What happened with Prince Jeffrey?’. You hear footsteps trailing behind you, turning your head slightly to see the one person who could stand to be around in this entire palace.
“What did Prince Jeffrey do?” Isabel, your handmaiden and only friend, questions who as she sped up to walk side-by-side with you.
You sigh, retracting the groan that was threatening to escape.
“He was a conceited and handsy idiot just like Walter, Arthur, Abraham, Edmund, and Bennett. I couldn’t stand him, Isabel. They are quite literally all the same.”
Isabel visibly frowns, nodding along to your words. You tilt your head up to glance at the dulled hallways of the palace. Paintings of your family line hung up along the velvet red walls — four-time great-grandparents in order down to you and your elder sister; Moira.
“Well, this has already been the sixth suitor. The King and Queen already said that you had to decide by your twentieth.” Isabel carefully reminded you, fiddling with the string of the front of her simple yet beautifully fitting dress.
“That’s just it. I don’t have any desire to marry. Especially to men like that.” You seethed, approaching your high bedroom doors.
The divine vine and floral gold design decorate the dark wood. You wrapped your fingers around the handle to tug it open, grunting softly at how heavy the door was. Isabel quickly rushed to your aid, pulling the door backward. You thanked her quietly before marching into your room.
“Is there anything I can do?” Isabel kindly asked you, only wanting to make sure you were feeling okay.
“If you could just help me get out of this ridiculous dress.” You let out a groan which caused the green-eyed woman to chuckle.
“Of course, princess.” Her tone was teasing as she approached you from behind to begin undoing the laces that were keeping the corset tight on your aching body.
You huff out a soft laugh at the words as you insisted multiple times that you hated being addressed as Princess by the maidens, knights, guards, and kitchen staff that lived in the palace. Especially Isabel. She was more than just your handmaiden and personal attendant, she was your friend that you cared for.
Once she unraveled the last lace, you breathed correctly for the first time since your mother and the other maidens forced you into the constricting dress. She patted your tense back with a sigh.
“Better?”
Nodding through a soft pant, you say: “Incredibly.”
You both chuckle as you gradually sit on your large mattress.
“Anything else you may need?” Isabel questions as she stands next to you on the bed, torso meeting your temple.
Your eyes soften at her question, calming down as you take in a deep breath. You take her soft hands in yours, shaking your head.
“You’re too kind to me, Bel. I think I should just lie down now. You should rest as well before I have to endure whatever my parents will say tomorrow.” You nod, your voice is equally as gentle to her.
Isabel nodded, not having much more to add to the conversation. It was now entirely too late for either of you. The sun had been set since the ball began, the darkness taking over the once bright blue sky.
“Well, we’ll speak more in the morning.” Isabel nodded curtly, giving your hands a single squeeze.
“First thing.” You nod, releasing her hands.
Sharing one more smile, you watch as she leaves your grand room. A lonely feeling settles in your chest as you begin to undress for the night. You knew in the morning you were going to endure your mother and father’s scolding and lectures about how to not ‘embarrass their lineage’ and how ‘childish’ you were.
If you were silent enough and held your breath, you could hear the voices from the ballroom; disappointed and angry with the event ending early. Maybe you had gone too far this time with Prince Jeffrey.
No, he was not appealing by any means.
Left in your slip dress, you slowly crawl underneath the silky sheets covering your large mattress. Once your head laid down on the sheets, you fell into a familiar exhausted slumber.
You were awoken from an empty dream by the morning horns, the sun's rays beaming in through the tall windows near your bed. You sat up quickly, pushing your frizzy hair out of your face.
Without any sort of warning, you hear your bedroom door swing open. Following in were three of your usual maidens who helped you get ready in the morning. Isabel then trailed in soon after, flashing you a quick smile as you appeared extremely tired.
“Morning, princess.” All three of the maidens speak in unison causing you to quickly put on that fake persona.
“Morning, Mildred,” you nod towards Mildred; tall and blonde. “Vivian,” her baby face and dark skin shine as she bows. “Beth.” Her fiery hair shone in the sunlight as she, too, bowed in respect towards you.
“The king and queen have called you in to share some crucial news in the throne room,” Mildred speaks up, eyes boring into yours.
Your brows furrow immediately at the different choice of words. After incidents like last night, it would be the same from either of the girls: “The king and queen are requesting your presence.”
News? What news could there possibly be?
“Well, I should get dressed then. Can’t have them waiting too long.” You nod slowly, removing your now warm bed sheets from your body.
Isabel rushed to your wardrobe as Beth scurried to your side to help you out of bed.
You were exceptionally privileged and you were aware of it. Especially in these instances where you could easily dress yourself and make up your room but the maidens did it for you. It makes you feel lazy and useless.
“This dress should be perfect. Not too tight around the waist and flattering.” Isabel approached you with said dress in the palms of her hands, grinning kindly.
You trusted her so you thanked her quietly, allowing them to take over.
Within minutes, your tossed sheets were made finely by Mildred and Vivian. Isabel and Beth helped you into the dress, making sure your undergarments were hidden by the other fabrics.
The fit was quite pleasant, you must admit. The front was a bit lower than you had thought but you had rarely been so comfortable in your wardrobe without it just being those undergarments.
Your natural hair flowed down and over your shoulders, a black ribbon tied to keep half of it out of your face. A few flyways escaped but you enjoyed how it frames your face. The girls clamored around you, hands on every part of your dress to smooth out wrinkles.
God forbid the princess appear imperfect in any way.
Once they had finished getting you ready, they left the room, leaving you and Isabel to walk down the beautifully decorated halls to make your way to where your presence was requested.
“Do you have any idea what this news could be?” You mutter softly, eyes locked on Isabel’s side profile.
“I’m not sure if it’s true but apparently in the late of the night, the king and queen discussed assigning a knight to look over you,” Isabel whispered as her eyes darted to the line of knights that were passing by the two of you.
The metal clanked as they walked in an orderly fashion. You assumed it was for training as they tended to take about two hours to train before standing in their assigned places around the castle.
“Look over me?” You asked in disbelief.
You weren’t a toddler that needed to be looked after. You already felt your blood boiling as you were approaching the grand archway of the throne room.
“That was all I heard passing by Linda and Nina in the kitchen this morning.” Isabel quickly whispered.
Linda and Nina were older women in the kitchen who, although talented in the kitchen, gossiped about you constantly. You assumed it was jealousy of either your title or your youth.
Your eyes darted from the high marble archways to the gold-lined thrones that sat both of your parents. Your attitude was already set in place as you walked up just a few feet from them. The stomping of your everyday flats echoed against the floors, revealing how irritated you already were.
“Father—“ You began with annoyance laced in your tone.
“No!” His deep voice echoed, cutting you off as he slammed down his staff.
Out of the corner of your eye, Isabel flinched at the loud sound. Your breathing was heavy as you maintained eye contact with your father. He didn't scare you as he did his overly dramatic actions.
It only increased the amount of hatred you had towards him. Your mother remained silent, glancing at your father before flickering her eyes back to you.
“I am going to talk. You are going to listen and not interrupt me. I have had it with this… humiliating attitude you’ve decided to put on.” Your father seethed, a vein on his neck protruding. “Prince Jeffrey is a guest in our kingdom and you embarrassed him. This temper is childish. You will be twenty by mid-July and you’re behaving this way. Moira had not been so stubborn about her suitors as you have.”
You felt your nostrils flare as of course, he was blaming you for the way Prince Jeffrey had reacted last night. It was never a man's fault, no. Only you and your temper. Throwing you and your elder sister’s differences in your face as well wasn’t unheard of.
“You must formally apologize to both Jeffrey and the Queen effective immediately.” Your mother intervened, her tone rather calm in comparison to your father.
You remained silent, simply nodding to her words. There was no point in arguing as you knew they were going to shut you down. You watched as your parents exchanged a look before shifting in their thrones.
“Now, because of your rather upsetting actions the night prior, your mother and I have chosen a knight to make sure this doesn’t happen again.” Your father sucked in a deep breath before continuing his words. “Dame Callahan will be your knight.”
Your eyes narrowed as you heard ‘dame’ instead of ‘sir’. There were very few knights that were women so you were automatically expecting there to be a man. You knew of Sir Callahan as he was a noble knight that you’ve known since you were a child but not Dame Callahan.
“Sir Callahan has a daughter?” You question, folding your hands in front of you.
This was certainly news to you. You weren’t even aware that he had a wife to begin with, let alone a secret daughter.
“Indeed. Now, she’s only had her knight status for a year but hopefully, you’ll adapt to her professionalism. Learn from her.” Your mother answers, her brows raising at you accusingly. “She should be arriving any minute now.”
As if right on cue, you hear the horns from the guards outside echo faintly. You turn your neck to glance at the hallway that leads to the main entryway doors.
“Well,” your father cleared his throat, “Let’s go and properly greet them, yes?”
Your eyes locked with Isabel who was already peering down the hallway where you all were headed. You approach her with a forced grin, locking your arm with hers as you take your time walking towards the grand entrance. Her eyes soften as she knows you are feeling a range of emotions about this whole arrangement.
“How are you doing?” Isabel hums, trying to keep quiet as the king and queen are just a foot behind you two.
“Other than absolutely infuriated,” you suck in a deep breath, tilting your head at the freckled woman, “Alright.”
Isabel nods, not knowing what to do now. You knew you were being short but you didn't want to say something you didn't mean out of anger towards the kind woman. You simply pressed your head to hers gently to show you were listening.
“I’m sure Dame Callahan won’t be as difficult as your parents are.” Isabel sighs, keeping her volume quiet. “You might even like her. Make a new friend that isn’t me.”
You gape at her words, nudging her with your hip as you both chuckle to yourselves. You cherish these fleeting moments of joy, holding onto them to keep for your worser days.
“What are you insinuating?”
“Nothing.” Isabel shook her head, her laughter fading as the front door guards were now holding the heavy wood open.
You glanced at Isabel once more before releasing her arm to walk past the guards in their uniforms of the castle's flag colors, watching as they bowed as you and your parents passed by. You nod in response before stepping out on the open staircase, the sun’s beams burning into your skin.
Rounding the corner of the gates was a person on a dark brown horse — borderline black. You feel Isabel’s tense presence along with your father’s looming figure and your mother’s petite one.
You fixed your posture, taking in one deep breath as you awaited her arrival.
“Oh, sweet pea, this dress was not the most appropriate choice.” You hear your mother utter as she judgingly ranks her eyes up and down your frame.
“I can’t change now, Mother, so it’ll have to do.” You snarkily replied, eyes locked ahead of you.
You didn't have to be facing your mother to know she did not appreciate your response. Letting it go for now, you, your parents, and Isabel begin to wave at who you assumed to be Dame Callahan. The stranger knight tugs on the maritangle causing the horse to stop in its tracks right in front of the impressive stone steps.
Callahan begins to make her way up the steps, giving you a better look at her.
It had to have just been you, but you took in how perfect her skin appeared as she grew closer. You could feel Isabel’s eyes burning into the side of your head, clearly waiting for some sort of reaction to Dame Callahan.
First, she greeted both of your parents addressing them with their assigned greetings. Her voice was velvety, charming almost. You waited patiently for her to greet you, hands flexing anxiously by your sides. She didn't appear knight-like as all she was wearing were a pair of black boots, a simple commoner-appearing outfit, and a leather belt that held her sword in that same leather material.
“Princess,” she addresses you before kneeling on one knee, gingerly taking her hand in her gloved one. You tense as she leans her head forward to place her lips on the back of your hand.
Her eyes peer up at you, her dark lashes highlighting her alluring blue eyes. You hadn’t uttered a word yet, completely forgetting all the words you’ve ever known. Dame Callahan releases your hand once she notices how eerily still you’ve become.
“Princess, I’ve heard a lot of things about you,” Callahan speaks again, adjusting the belt on her waist to respectfully smile at you.
Has she already let go of your hand? You thought to yourself. You feel a sharp bone drive into your lower back which causes you to inhale, becoming aware of what was going on. You caress the hand that she had kissed before holding your hands in front of your hips.
“I hope they were all good things.” You reply, regaining your proper posture.
“Yes,” Dame Callahan replies, a small chuckle leaving her lips. “Though, they surely forgot to mention your beauty.”
You blink. Did she just compliment you? It could be an out-of-respect situation. Kissing up to you as you were certain that your parents weren’t that kind with informing Dame Callahan about being assigned to you.
“Oh, well,” you nod, feeling out of your own body. “Thank you, Dame Callahan.”
“Of course, Princess.” She, again, responds with such a poised attitude.
You were feeling extremely conflicted about Dame Callahan. A part of you wanted to get to know her; starting with her first name. Another part was admiring her side profile as she spoke to your father and mother. Why were you admiring her in the first place? You weren’t entirely sure.
“Well, Dame Callahan could settle into her new manor as we prepare the welcome lunch.” Your mother spoke up which caught your attention. “Sweet pea?”
You blink and turn to your mother to see her waiting impatiently for you to say something. Dame Callahan’s head was tilted with furrowed brows as you seemed to be zoning in and out of the conversation.
“Oh! Right! I can show you where you’ll be staying.” You send Dame Callahan a short grin, afraid to stare at her for too long.
The new knight nodded, respectfully bowing at both of your parents and Isabel before stepping to the side to allow you to go first. You begin to make your way down the steps as the manor for the knight's living space is a tower away from the main palace. The hot sun beeped down on your skin, a cool spring breeze brushing past your flowing hair.
The whole walk to the manor was eerily quiet. Neither you nor Dame Callahan were making any form of small talk. All you could hear were the horses huffing a few feet away in the stables, the clinking of metal from the other knights in uniform, and the chirping of the birds in the surrounding trees.
Your shoulders brushed for a mere second as she walked alongside you. You could see from your peripheral stealing glances at you like she wanted to say something but not uttering a word. To be fair, you were doing the same thing.
As you approach the large wooden door, you turn to her as you pause right in front of the entryway. She, too, pauses her steps with you, eyes locking on your face.
Why was her stare burning into you more than the sun? It felt so intense.
“This is the knight’s manor. I will see you around the lunch hour then.” You say.
Out of fear of flushing in her presence, you avoid pouring your eyes into her bright ones.
Dame Callahan nods, and a crinkle between her brows forms. “Is everything alright, princess?”
“Yes, of course. I think I’m just hungry.” You nod slowly, a nervous smile forming on your face.
Could she see right through you? It sure seemed like it. Callahan simply nods, knowing better than to press on such a matter, especially with a princess.
“Right, yes. I’ll just…” She trailed off, pointing to the door.
Your eyes followed her finger before a wave of embarrassment washed over you. A nervous laugh left your lips before nodding and waving your hand towards the door.
“Until lunch then.”
Dame Callahan’s lips quipped into a smile that seemed endearing. She placed a hand on the iron ring and tugged the door open. She bowed ever so slightly.
“Until then, princess.”
The door shut with a loud clunk, flinching at the sudden noise. For the rest of the morning, all you could think about was the way she said ‘princess’ towards you.
Lunch-time arrived in the middle of an etiquette lesson with Mrs. DuBois. The bells went off causing you instantly slouch in your seat. Your back was killing you from how aligned you were forcing onto yourself.
“We’ll continue this lesson tomorrow.” Mrs. DuBois sharply tapped at your back to get you to straighten your posture. “Though, I do not understand the point of this. You slouch so much, you are becoming a hunchback, princess.”
You send her a tight-lipped grin as you smooth down your dress. Isabel was waiting patiently for you in the corner of the room so she could walk you out.
“Lunch calls.” You force a laugh out.
Mrs. DuBois, unamused, nods before turning her back towards you and Isabel. You frown at her obvious attitude before motioning with your head towards the door. Isabel got the hint and gave Mrs. DuBois a quick goodbye.
Once they were out into the hallway, you began to chuckle with Isabel at how stuck-up Mrs.DuBois was.
“She said I have a hunchback, Bel. How dramatic is that?” You scoff, shaking your head.
“I swear, she’s never once felt an ounce of joy in her entire life.” Isabel added on, rounding the corner.
You two are giggling when you walk into the enormous dining hall. You could smell the delicious stew the staff had cooked for you all. You caught sight of Dame Callahan already sitting at the elongated table.
Right in front of your seat next to your mother.
“She’s sitting right across from me.” You slow down your feet, growing anxious to approach the table.
Isabel furrowed her brows, following your eyes to see Dame Callahan already conversing with your mother. Unable to comprehend what was wrong about that, she asks: “Is that bad?”
“No. Not necessarily. Just…” You trail off as you approach the table with Isabel.
You couldn’t even think of a valid excuse for how you felt about her place at the table. Why was she doing this to your mind? Maybe it was the thought that from this point forward, she was going to be quite literally around every corner, near you around the clock from dusk to dawn.
Sure, Isabel was already that but she had been around you for years. Dame Callahan was new and a stranger.
“Oh! Sweet pea, we were just discussing what exactly Dame Callahan will be doing whilst being your knight.” Your mother looked over at the intimidating knight, an overly friendly smile on her face.
You glance at your mother before taking your place right next to your father, Isabel sitting on the other side of you. All of the bowls of steaming hot beef stew thankfully distracted you as you patiently waited for your father to signal that it was okay to eat.
By that, you meant ‘the king always eats first.’ Once he took his first sip, you began to dig in shamelessly.
“So, Dame Callahan,” your father started, voice deep and booming.
“Yes, sir?” She perked up, eyes wide with patience.
“Your father never mentioned your name.” He plainly stated.
You, too, were curious about her first name, eyes darting over to her sharp features that were highlighted by the sun peeking in through the large windows. Her eyes flickered to you, strangely enough, before uttering her name.
“Hazel, your majesty.” She nodded, a smile forming on her perfectly pink lips.
Hazel. It suited her, you thought. Its simplicity was beautiful.
“It’s a lovely name.” You confess, sending her the least awkward smile you could muster.
Hazel’s eyes locked with yours. Her smile matched yours; genuine and kind.
“Thank you, princess.”
You break eye contact first, feeling overwhelmed by the intensity of her stare. You continue eating, eyes dancing from person to person as they add to the conversation. After everyone listened to how Hazel’s journey was to the kingdom, it was around the same time that everyone was finishing up their bread and stew.
“Well, I believe this is the first time you’ve not spoken during a feast,” your father speaks up, eyes locking on yours.
“I don’t have much to say, father.” You quip.
“You’re not always that way, sadly enough.” His tone was quite obviously degrading and meant to humiliate you.
You prod your tongue into the inside of your cheek, wondering why he was starting this right now. Hazel had just arrived and he was already trying to pick a fight with you.
“Oh, your majesty, it’s alright. I think I’ve talked enough for now,” Hazel quickly buts in.
You glance at her, furrowing your brows at her unexpectedly. She was looking directly at your father for just a moment before sending you a soft look.Your father hadn’t replied back to Hazel’s quick words but you feared he might. You straighten your back and clear your throat as you stand up, smoothing down your dress
“I’m feeling full now. May I leave the dining table?” You stare expectantly at your parents, hoping they would just let you this one time.
Your mother simply nods as you turn to Isabel who had already finished her meal. She took that as a hint to leave as well, nodding respectfully towards your parents and Hazel. Her familiar arms lock with yours as you walk down the hallway to venture to your room.
“She seems nice.” Isabel spoke first, looking at you for confirmation that you felt that same way.
You didn’t know what to feel.
tag-list: @beabeebrie @gr4veyardsblog @suivyfx @hazelsbbg @quicksilversg1rl @eggplantfingers @vster0769 @dropsofs4turn @uraesthete @hotgirlsreadfanfiction @toritea @elise-kira @heartshazel @ahdbodhr @lovers-rck @allshadesgray @thewinterlunarhalo @sundogdyke @v4mpygoth @doeshifts @fruitysnackysmain @moonisu @crvptidgf @hazelenjoyer @ellieluvers @deadgirlwalkingtaylorsversion @mamawanda @curiousshifter101 @hwcniprtnd @sadprose-auroras @guzzlingplastic111 @holysheepsoul @bugaboodarling @lightmywayout @ourautumn86 @evidinspiration @bellaramseygfsblog @itsvioletelllies-girl @teenagedramaqueenlisa @darlingoutlaw @steveharringtonisfit @80wallows @that-one-little-soy-bean @yogkurts @bumblebeeeessss @prettygirlfemme @marsmallowsxoxo @serinatly100986 @confusedgemposts @paqerings @em16cor @cherryflavoured7777 @mommyneytiri @tay1230 @akila-twt @idkwhatimdoingherelmao @koremis
#hazel callahan#bottoms movie#hazel callahan x reader#bottoms 2023#wlw#hazel callahan x you#hazel callahan fic#knight hazel
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rating forgetmenauts couples on ren faire cosplay ability
bigfoot and mothman- 4/10
now they may be ICONIC, but god this would be a pain. either you do it low effort and just look like a regular wedding or do it high effort and then melt bc summer is ren faire season and it will be hot. the slay value is off the charts though. maybe if they're on their honeymoon?
thomas the rhymer & his faerie queen- 9/10
Average Fairytale Man and beautiful ethereal faeire queen is such a dynamic and you wouldn't be too hard-pressed to do either of them! you could even spice it up and do hawker thomas! wouldn't stand out too much at all.
helena and gerard-8/10
great and wonderful and beautiful. 1872 is SUCH a time period to be replicating the fashions of. absolutely gorgeous. vampires are inherently pretty too. however they have exactly Zero defining features other than vampire so have fun with that.
the rusalka and the shepherd girl- 10/10
this would go SO hard. shepherd girl-esque outfits and humanoid fantasy creatures are both ren fest staples and i am just reiterating how UNNECESSARILY HARD THIS WOULD GO. no complaints. perfect.
persephone and hades- 7/10
i mean. iconic. beautiful for sure. however as we have discussed, summer is ren fest season, and not being together during summer is kinda their whole thing. also they're maybe the least forgetmenauts-y couple on this list bc its a retelling.
the summer king and his husband- 9/10
breathtaking. the summer king music video is so gorgeously beautiful. -1 point because in said music video the summer king does not have legs. if you're a wheelchair user disregard that last segment its an 11/10 for you.
gay werewolfs- 2/10
if you want to either wear fursuits or do the most low effort unrecognizable cosplay ever these are the fellows for you! they have even less defining features than helena and gerard, i don't even know how you would successfully cosplay them.
charlatan in red & foxbride- 3/10
i would LOVE to see people's interpretations of the foxbride. however a ren fest is probably not the place for that. i also feel like perhaps drawings would be better than a human for portraying that. the phrase "charlatan in red" evokes a lot of ren fest vibes though so idk!
zombie promgoers- 5/10
now this may not fully fit the theme of ren fest but i personally would love to do this. get that sunday best into rags and tatters and dirty yourself up. the outfits would be great and it definitely wouldn't be the weirdest things there.
tam lin & lover- 4/10
i may be unsure how you would successfully do this but that won't stop me from thinking its a good idea. another song that has a set time it takes place in that is not summer, not sure how i feel about that. if you went solo as tam lin's captor though????? 10/10gorgeous perfect etc.
james & lover from cottonwood- 1/10
have fun cosplaying High School Boy.
skeletons from interlace of bones- 0/10
theyre skeletons.?
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I love gay Eddie and bisexual awakening Steve. It's solid and popular for a reason. It works, makes a lot of sense.
But...I also love flirty-cluelessly-queer Eddie and comfortable-with-his sexuality Steve.
Eddie does flirt. With everyone. It was pretty clear he was flirting with Chrissy. He was flirting with Steve. Calling him big boy and getting up in his personal space, being all cutesy.
So, imagine Eddie just casually flirting with Steve and it doesn't mean anything to him. He's just being Eddie. He isn't even aware that it's flirting. He really considers it teasing. The man is dramatic and silly. He loves to make a scene. So "teasing" people is fun for him.
Eddie who is a super senior running a DnD club for outcasts, loves Lord of the Rings, plays in a metal band. I think Eddie is always into some sort of hyperfixation to be trying to bang chicks or dudes.
There was totally a phase were he was obsessed with folk and old country music (Woody Guthrie much). There was the Jane Austen phase (It fits, c'mon). The time he tried to learn to crochet. His lasting phase with fantasy novels. His intense love of metal music. He knows a lot about music in general. Obscure shit. Oh, those handcuffs-definitely from his magic phase. Tell me, 12 year old Eddie didn't want to be a magician. He probably did card tricks, the whole deal.
Eddie would be the kind of guy who'd spout all sorts of random knowledge. He probably has one specific time period in history he could rant about for hours.
The man has raging ADHD (takes one to know one). He's a self-professed nerd and outcast. The only thing that might be considered "cool" is that he plays in his band. But even then, he's a total nerd about it.
Eddie is hot as hell. That is undeniable. But Eddie has been too damn busy being a fucking nerd to date or hook up. I think he's so focused on his interests, it could easily not have been on his radar. Same way he's failed senior year twice in a row despite being smart as hell. The shit they are trying to teach doesn't interest him and that makes Eddie fucking struggle.
He's bouncy and hyperactive. He probably has terrible tunnel vision when he gets into a book or movie or campaign. Dating has thus far not been interesting enough especially combined with how he's treated by the people in Hawkins.
So, yeah- he flirts and teases. He thinks it's harmless fun. With Chrissy, it was a way to make her feel safe and lighten the mood. With Steve, it's a way to disarm him. It's King Steve afterall. Why not play up the metalhead freak persona. Let him think he's weird.
It isn't until Steve starts flirting back and gives Eddie butterflies that Eddie realizes this is not heterosexual behavior. And he knows a lot about that because he was accidentally flagging for a whole goddamn year. Because he wanted to look metal as fuck and thought the bandana was badass.
Steve calls Eddie princess. Calls him pretty boy. Throws in a babe. Everytime Eddie refers to him as big boy or Stevie, Steve just smirks and comes up with a new pet name that wrecks Eddie (who has no idea what is fucking going on). Throw in the boys getting high together with no inhibitions and Steve actively trying to romance him and Eddie's in a full blown sexuality crisis.
best part: Steve thinks Eddie is gay because of the bandana that he wore all year. Add in all the flirting and then Steve's really putting the moves on totally clueless Eddie. And say what you want about Steve, but he has game. I can just imagine Eddie trying to frantically figure out why all of the sudden he wants to make out with Steve "the hair" Harrington and Steve's like...aren't you gay?
(if anyone knows of steddie fics anything like this, please rec them!)
#clueless eddie#steddie#i love eddie having the crisis/awakening and steve being the one already aware#it's a nice flip of the usual narrative
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Quick analysis of the Liu Xiao PV
At first the choice of the bishop was surprising to me, cause I would have expected a queen
however then I looked a bit into the symbolism
and yeah, this does fit well, he's a character that works from the sidelines and strategizes. I do find the dyplomacy bit interesting, could relate to him trying to get lu guang to join him
In terms of the cultural interpretations, the whole PV is full of religious symbolism, so that part definitely tracks as well.
Side note, love that they picked purple for him, it's usually connected with royalty or corruption, so I wonder how that ties into everything. It also relates to the church, but there are several robe colors, so it's probably more than just that.
to pick goats, usually symbolizing lucifer, to worship him, especially combined with the previous headless angel statue, is… definitely a choice…
I do find it interesting how the goats, the headless angel (later the angel with bleeding eyes) are things which are associated with hell, meanwhile the colors, the lighting, those are associated with god and heaven.
a 10-ace straight, not much more to say besides it showing him having power
interesting how much younger he looks here, less tired, too. used to have everything very easily, but lu guang is proving to be a worthy adversary and that's taking a toll on him?
and now, speaking of lu guang
the knight piece
Again, shows Lu Guang as a worthy advercary, one he can't predict.
But the cultural interpretations are the interesting part for me
The eastern traditions could be connected to his powers and the ideals he tries to present "past or future let them be." At the same time although he messes with time, he does try to balance that, like it's said here, he changes things, but is careful with it.
With the western interpretation we have him trying to save cxs, that's the noble part, what's more the knight is also often connected with some damsel, which can be interpreted as cxs.
And about cxs, he is represented by the king piece
Although the king is crucial in chess, he also doesn't have much movement. Cheng Xiaoshi is central to the plot, but knows nothing of it, really. The king, is a piece that's targeted and vulnerable, obvious connection.
What is interesting to me is this shot
which I interpret as Liu Xiao basically saying "he will be your downfall" to Lu Guang.
And because of that, back to lu guang, this time his relationship with Liu Xiao
Previously, every time Lu Guang was refered to in music videos and just music ("Mastermind" being a prime example) by Liu Xiao, it has been in this toxic, very possessive sense. And here it's no different
He sees him as something to play with
And just like how in "Mastermind" you have this combination of hunter and pray with some, I would argue, sexual connotations, you see the same here, especially in this shot
Because the easiest way to present something sexual when it comes to gay relations in censored media is to try to use the female body as a symbol for one of the characters.
In adition we also have the line
"Would you ever want to become my friend?"
Considering what I've just said, I'm gonna say that the "friend" part is not exacly accurate, however, this lyric does show how he views all his relationships, too
With him to be revered
#says ''quick analysis'' writes an essay#though this is just everything that came to my mind as I was watching it#I'm sure I missed a lot#link click#shiguang daili ren#liu xiao#lu guang#cheng xiaoshi
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BroZone + Poppy & Viva headcanons!
I feel like infodumping about my headcanons for the crew so here they are!!!
Poppy:
Age: 23
Pronouns: she/her
Pansexual
Has ADHD (mainly attention deficit and hyperactivity)
She's Latina (Salvadorian, Mexican and Black)
More of a King Peppy hc but he's Salvadorian and Mexican, their mom is probably black and Mexican
Has Synesthesia (mainly being seeing color when others speak or when she hears noises)
Was a premature baby
Branch
Age: 25
Pronouns: He/him
Bisexual
Has autism
He's Black and Filipino
His common stims are flapping his hands and biting his lip
Has BPD (borderline personality disorder) due to his trauma from a young age
Had extensive singing training as a kiddo
Was nicknamed Twig cuz he was small as a baby
Quite fond of kids and finds them cute
Viva
Age: 28
Pronouns: She/they
Pansexual
Autistic and ADHD
She loves playing with people's hair, mainly Clay's
Calls Clay "Clayton" to mess with him/piss him off
Has a form of adjustment disorder and severe attachment issues (in the sense that she is constantly trying to keep those she loves in a place where she thinks is safe)
Has been singing since she could talk
Her first word was probably "music"
John Dory
Age: 45
Pronouns: He/him
Aromantic & asexual
Neurotypical
He feels forced to make sure he and his brother's are perfect just because he's the oldest
He doesn't like it when he's called bossy
Tends to speak a little too honestly (he's vv blunt)
Cares a lot for his brothers, especially Branch since he's the youngest
Not fond of kids, but loves his niece and nephews
Supports his gay brothers (Floyd and Branch) the best he can as an ace-aro (he's not interested in love but tries to for all of his brothers sake 😭 but they don't mind his disinterest)
Enjoys rap and pop music, maybe even hip-hop
Bruce
Age: 40
Pronouns: he/him
Demisexual
Neurotypical
He could rant about Brandi for ages, he loves her so much
Knows sign language because one of his kids are deaf (all the brothers know sign language mainly cuz branch was nonverbal for a while and spoke with sign)
Plays bass guitar
Clay
Age: 35
Pronouns: he/they
Asexual & demiromantic
QPP's with Viva
Doesn't understand why Floyd is emo 💀
Has OCD
He LOVES *NSYNC's music and had no idea Branch was the lead singer
Loves to crochet things for Viva and now he can make things for all of his brothers
AND FINALLY MY SECOND FAVORITE BROTHER!!!!
Floyd
Age: 30
Pronouns: he/him
HE IS GAY. PERIOD. he's also demisexual!
Nearly cried when Branch came out to him, didn't stop hugging him and telling him how proud he was of his little brother
Isn't too fond that Branch had vocal training at such a young age
Autistic
He's emo, he likes emo shit and he's an emo FREAK‼️‼️‼️ (he's silly tho)
Good friends with Veneer and visits him sometimes (he's kinda scared of Velvet)
Doesn't like being stereotyped as a typical gay man
Taught Branch how to walk and speak sign language before he taught the rest of his brothers how to speak ASL (American Sign Language)
That's all I got :33 fell free to share ur headcanons in the tags if you wanna!!!!!!
#ghostly talks.#trolls band together#trolls#trolls world tour#trolls poppy#trolls dreamworks#dreamworks trolls#branch trolls#trolls movie#trolls 3#trolls branch#trolls floyd#trolls bruce#trolls brozone#trolls john dory#trolls clay#trolls viva#trolls Broppy#queen poppy#Trolls#poppy and branch#poppy trolls#branch x poppy#branch#viva and Poppy#brozone
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intro nontheless 🔥
before i get started, i do not post anything to do with political issues in the world.
i am not being hateful, i just simply do not know enough about it. im very uneducated on it and id rather not get into politics online. thank you. x
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name: wil / wiliam
pronouns: he/him
gender: trans masc
sexuality: gay
age: 1m a minor. but idc abt 'dni
adults', yall are chill
birthday: june 2nd
zodiac: gemini
MBTI: iNTP
fandoms: house md, dead poets society,
swing kids, arctic monkeys,
big bang theory
jeeves and wooster, rsl, hugh
laurie, hamilton (musical & hi-
story, history mainly)
extra info: i might dm you. randomly. i love
sending random asks mbbbb bros
warnings: i will make suggestive jokes as
i am a teenage boy in secondary
school, lol. also maybe sense-
tive subjects? ill always add
a tw. just yeah-
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my dear mutuals;
@example-of-a-romantic @asclexe @arrr-im-a-dead-poet @yourfavvgal @prettypinkbubbless @adozenforks @desire-mona @forrestpoet @ghostboyhood @sillyhyperfixator @jellifishiez @joonof1989 @kattt-5865 @lv3buzzz @zephsterrrrrrrrrr @crow-king-ash @xxcherryberriezxx @vivaalaviidaaa @boabel @birdyboyfly @neil-perrys-reincarnation @noctilucaa @neil-perrys-suicidal-tendencies @1mlostnow @anhonest-puck @pingunaa @this-vexes-me @richardcameronshusband @littlelqtte @more-mousebites @alightelixe @consumed-star @billi-ashli @literallydoctorhouse <3
(i think thats everyone, just please dm or ask if i missed you. or if you wouldn't like to be tagged <3)
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boundaries ‼️
i dont appreciate people being negative. like all the time. im extremely good at reading people, so if i feel like you are lying about your problems, i will block you. its happened too many times. my dms are open if you need to vent, but dont make it a regular thing. i have my own things to deal with, so i appreciate if you only vent a few times - make it occasional.
also please dont block me outta nowhere. i wanna know what i did, please.
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my side blog; @ask-head-of-cardio ! i dont use it as much as id like to but go check it out <3
ask wilson blog; @dr-well-adjusted
ask meeks blog; @mr-ill-try-anything-once
gore/medical blog; @w1l-g0r3y
─────────ೋღ 🎧 ღೋ─────────
my kins;
steven meeks [dead poets society (1989)]
james wilson [house md (2004-2012)]
will mackenzie [the inbetweeners (2008-2010)]
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arvid ???? [swing kids (1993)]
adam kay [this is going to hurt (2022)]
links to significant posts & my socials;
oc info - sydney forrest
top post
tiktok
airbuds
spotify
stats
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background on my user!;
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special mentions;
@yourfavvgal - matching bios ‼️
@literallydoctorhouse - MY BOYFRIEND ❤
@joonof1989 - MATCHING PFPS TEDHDE
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bonus..;
MATCHING WITH MY DUSTI/COTTON SCRAPP 😚😚 @lefthandedspaghetti
#intro post#new intro post#introduction#blog intro#pinned intro#introductory post#heheh#intro#ksshsdksb
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IN-DEPTH ANALYSIS OF THE CULT'S DYNAMICS
Disclaimers: Sensitive topics are discussed below the cut; please do not incite drama, speak hate, or engage in bullying. I am not a mental health professional; I make no claims of expertise (in anything). This is a collection of my thoughts about what is currently happening on the Taekook side of ARMY, in the hopes that it may help us as a community respond more effectively to the toxic parts of our fandom. If you click below this cut, you are assuming responsibility for your own behavior and agreeing to engage with my blog respectfully, or you will be blocked.
THE NARRATIVES AT WORK
I submit that shipping Taekook is both an evolving conspiracy theory and a living cult.
There are various narratives within this subgroup, but in general, to ship Taekook, one must believe Kim Taehyung and Jeon Jungkook are in a closeted gay romantic relationship.
One also likely believes that their company (both BigHit and Hybe) and everyone around them have always actively hid their gay relationship.
Initially, Taekook (the “real” gay couple) was being hidden by Jikook (the “fake” gay couple) because Jikook was somehow more popular in Korea and therefore considered to be more profitable.
And this was the main narrative for years. It got Jimin dragged and hated online and in real life, to the point there was even a credible shooting threat at a concert.
Now, the narrative is being modified in light of the video footage revealed this week involving Taehyung and Jennie.
If Taekookers accept at all that Jennie and Tae were indeed photographed holding hands in Paris this week, then they likely believe both their companies are using this as a PR Relationship stunt to hide their real gay relationships before military service and comeback projects.
This belief includes:
1) assuming Taehyung and Jennie are not being honest;
2) believing Taehyung and Jungkook have no agency or power within their own companies; and,
3) all of their members and managers are also in on this nefarious plot.
Whether they believe Taennie is just cosplayers in an orchestrated smear campaign, or two actual idols in a PR Relationship, regardless, a large segment of this subgroup still believe that Jimin is the company favorite who gets special treatment.
Therefore, things that should be Taekook’s (such as songs and subunits and couple-like interactions) are instead given to the company’s king of fan service, to the point where Jimin “assaults” Jungkook with “unwanted” attention and physical contact.
THE LOGICAL FALLACIES
As amazingly popular as our Korean It Boy is, I have serious doubts about Jimin being the “company favorite” ever since Hybe took over two years ago.
As the “company favorite,” I’d love it if he got more lines in group songs, or was allowed to film as many music videos as he wanted, or could be given more than 10 days of promotion time for a project he spent a year working on. It would be stellar if the “company favorite” had in-ears that worked correctly during live broadcasts, or was invited onto IU’s show, or could host streaming parties or sell exclusive merch. To say nothing of the “company favorite” getting far more reality show appearances and magazine interviews and a Disney documentary with behind the scenes footage! Heck, I’d settle for his songs not being split on Spotify, his views not being culled on YouTube, and maybe just one congratulatory statement to the press or even just a CAKE celebrating his historic Hot 100 #1.
At least Jimin was “allowed” to include a hidden track with Jungkook (that wasn’t advertised or available to stream, so not fan service) and he was allowed to queer code his Like Crazy music video. So I believe he has some agency and say over his projects. I’m not sure he’s entirely understood or appreciated by his company—frankly, I think his potential was underestimated—but I don’t claim he’s a victim. Victim narratives play into cult dynamics.
But I digressed. I was talking about logical fallacies.
Let’s entertain the idea that for more YEARS, Jungkook and Taehyung have been horribly abused by their management and forced to hide their relationship.
They never thought to address this issue when they were renewing their contracts?
Also, what’s up with all the footage during RUN episodes when they are standing together, or on the same team, or hugging and cuddling, or leaning their heads on each other’s shoulders and legs?
Why were they allowed to flirt and dance and do skinship on stage—and all that stuff even made it into official footage?
Now let’s entertain the idea that Taennie is a PR Relationship.
So… two rival companies, just coming out of a bitter failed deal around a music industry monopoly, are now working together to make people believe Jennie and Tae are dating?
Even though idols LOSE popularity and company stocks take a DIVE when couples are revealed?
So Taennie is the strategy to promote solo albums and upcoming projects?? And both companies’ PR teams say “We can’t confirm it as it is their personal lives.” So no PR statement is the PR strategy??
We know it’s bullshit. It makes about as much sense as Hillary Clinton running a child sex trafficking ring out of the basement of a pizza parlor that doesn't have a basement.
But many in the cult believe it’s Absolute Truth.
The question is why?
The answer is in the dynamics at play here.
CULT DYNAMICS
It starts with a MISINFORMATION CAMPAIGN.
Baby ARMY get curious about BTS, hop on YouTube or TikTok, and are bombarded by the algorithm that claims Taekook is real.
Unless they go searching for original content (which takes up dozens and dozens of hours to sift through and much of which sits behind a paywall), they will not have much to contradict these claims.
Most older ARMY are understandably so sick and tired of the ship discourse that they don’t go into Taekook spaces and duke it out in the comments. Plus, content creators know that Taekook content gets hits and likes, which translates into passive income, so they keep making it.
See this video where a cult leader shows you she made over $109,000 in a year just from her Taekook edits:
So in the din of all this nonsense and noise, it’s up to Baby ARMY to seek out other voices, other input, to form an opinion. They have to be proactive. And sadly, a large segment of the population lacks critical thinking skills and do not WANT to seek facts.
We live in a very busy, post-fact world, where “credible messengers” (i.e., someone you know and trust) tell you their opinions. Then you try those opinions on for size, and they eventually become your opinions. It’s faster, it’s easier, and…
It lets you be part of the IN-GROUP. Next thing you know, you're part of a group chat with 400 indoctrinated members, spitting conspiracies like gospel truths.
In today’s globalized, fast-paced, hyper digital world, most people cannot tell you the names of their neighbors or local butcher or even their state’s politicians, let alone what all they stand for. But they can tell you how the Kardashians feel about organic salad in a plastic bowl, or what Trump believes about election results.
There’s a lack of real-world relationships that tether people to a shared reality.
And yet, there is a human need for Tribe.
A cult uses that instinct for TRIBE by constantly re-enforcing the notion that People Out There don’t understand, aren’t very nice, will even persecute you for knowing the truth.
But People In Here, the IN-GROUP, they appreciate you, they are reasonable and open-minded, they will be there for you when everyone else turns their backs on you and puts you down.
All you have to do to belong to the IN-GROUP is subscribe to these CONSPIRACY THEORIES.
First, you should think about becoming Anti-Establishment.
You cannot trust the Authority (company, government, scientists, whatever). The Authority is corrupt and will lie to you because it wants something from you (money, votes, microchips in the vaccines, whatever).
Do not trust what your eyes show you and what your ears hear. Believe your in-group. Be loyal to your found family. Your found family is SPECIAL.
Second, you need to begin to wake up to the Signs and Wonders.
Once you’re willing to see the truth, suddenly there are all these hints. All these little “Q-drops” of information. Like Taekook touching face moles during a song. Or seeing slowed-down, edited videos of facial expressions that look like evidence of jealousy. Or maybe hidden meanings behind tattoos of tigers and green mics. Or making a secret handshake or symbol with their fingers. These Signs and Wonders are FOR YOU.
*Now, I’m inclined to give Taekookers a bit of a break on queer couple coding because, culturally speaking, similar clothing and jewelry are couple-coded in Korea. And there are just as many if not MORE theories about Jikook using similar black and white clothing, matching jewelry, related tattoos, using special numbers in songs and timestamps, and even changing up lyrics as secret messages.
The issue here is that Jikook ACTUALLY DOES SOME OF THOSE THINGS. They actually deliberately type out specific numbers on some of their social media messages. They actually have dressed in the exact same outfits or worn each other’s clothes. They actually have changed up lyrics and sung them to each other.
Even so, any reasonable Jikooker will say “all of this is suspicious as hell, but not proof.” Like when Jungkook says his J tattoo stands for Jungkook—the placement over the M is suspicious, yes—but all sane Jikookers accept that Jungkook has spoken about that tattoo and he did not say it was for Jimin. We don't sit around calling Jungkook a liar just because we preferred our theory.
Taekookers, however, want what Jikook have so badly, even as they scorn it for merely being fan service.
Half the time the hints they claim are completely made up.
They see sandal footprints in the sand, and their leaders say it’s proof that Jungkook went on a secret beach date with Taehyung. Even though Taehyung went out with a friend and his parents that night.
Taekookers will see a photo of shoes all neatly lined up and say it’s a secret ski date with Hobi. Even though Jimin owns the exact same pair of shoes and there were no photos or accounts of them ever being at a ski lodge the day after Jin went into service.
Taekookers will swear they hear Jungkook’s voice off camera during Taehyung’s vlog and insist he was hiding in the trunk of the car during the drive to film. As if JK would hide in the trunk for hours instead of just… go in a different car that didn't have a camera??
All of these Signs and Wonders require a huge leap to arrive at the conclusion that Taekook is a romantic couple.
Meanwhile, evidence of Jikook spending birthdays together and couple holidays together and going on trips alone together and having integrated families and inner circles (stylists, tattoo artist, boxing coach) are ALL fan service. Every single person is in on the conspiracy.
Yes, even when JK’s mom screams “I love you!” to Jimin and makes her son eat seaweed soup on Jimin’s birthday, (JK was clearly FORCED to make up that story) it has to be fan service.
And when Jimin’s dad posts a photo of JK’s old dog on JK’s birthday (a birthday where Jimin visited him in the middle of working on his album, but Taehyung did not even though he wasn't working on anything), it's fan service. And when Mr. Park hosts a give-away event at his café where JK’s music is playing and cap and photo are proudly displayed next to JImin? Absolute fan service; he’s a money-hungry, attention-hungry cad, don’t you know? Even the charity he and his son do are fan service!
But JK went bowling with Wooga, so, Taekook are married. (Legally married. Not in Korea. But you know. They ARE married. Coming up on their third anniversary already!)
It’s all there, if you’re just willing to see the Signs and Wonders. And believe your cult leaders when there's nothing to see or wonder about at all.
Third and perhaps most important, is the Star-Crossed Lovers angle. The VICTIM CARD.
You see, it’s not bad enough that openly gay couples face pure hell in conservative countries anyway—losing their jobs, their families, sometimes their will to live because the stigma can be so bad. But on top of all that, for years and years, Taekook have been forced apart.
They’ve been just tortured by Jimin’s attention-whoring greedy nature, and made to endure fabricated fan service skinship!
(When Tae and JK look happy to be around Jimin, it’s just because they are professionals and such good actors!). Darn that Park Jimin, the abuser and sexual predator!!
And after so long being forced to hide, now in solo era, poor abused victimized Taekook can be loud. So loud. So very loud and wild and free!!
After all, during the Vegas concert, Jungkook sat on Taehyung’s lap!! He's NEVER sat on any other BTS members' lap (except for all of them).
And when Jungkook came online and said “Keep being jealous, I’ll keep holding Jiminie!” and that Jimin was HIS! Then fans kept asking him about Taehyung, so he also said Taehyung was his. It was totally his own organic idea (except for how it wasn't).
When fans kept pestering Jungkook during his camping VLive about Taehyung, he said he was forced to admit that Taehyung was attractive, he’d never seen a man so attractive! (FORCED to admit it! So romantic!)
Meanwhile, as all this shakes down, there’s this scandal in the press that Jimin didn’t pay his insurance premiums because his mail was omitted by the company. News of this dropped EXACTLY the moment his first OST With You came out, and he went totally quiet.
And then, Jungkook also went quiet for a while too. He deleted all his previous Insta photos that were personal and changed the layout to be totally professional. He went to the White House. He did a collab. He partied for JitB. He went on a Meat Tour of Korea. He did a concert with his members. He headlined World Cup. But mostly he was getting quieter and quieter.
Eventually Jungkook deleted the app entirely. Sometimes he stayed in his home for six days at a time. He stopped working out or going into Hybe; he started drinking whiskey. And nowadays he doesn’t even want to look at the comments on lives. Not because he was sick of the Taekookers or anything, but because “the company is forcing them to hide!”
Of course.
And all throughout 2022, Taehyung and Jungkook are paired up for things, and Tae's talking about a fortune teller saying he and Jungkook were “fire and water.” And rather than be taken as cute moments between friends, these are just VERY LOUD SIGNS AND WONDERS.
Then there are leaks online of all these photos that involved Tae and Jennie.
And thus begins tons of lives where he mentions Jungkook.
I'm not saying Kim Taehyung had an agenda to throw fans off the scent of his actual relationship, but I'm also not NOT saying that.
Whatever his motivations, the cult interpreted this as a direct message for Taekookers to keep the faith!
And indeed, Taekook do hang out—sometimes openly. (Sometimes where there’s press that make them hold up signs while cameras are going off—but that’s not for work, that’s a date, because the security team there wasn’t Hybe’s, and it was a friend’s premiere.) Sometimes quietly, where they share photos of hanging out afterwards.
But it cannot be just two friends hanging out. It’s Signs and Wonders!! SO LOUD!! SO FREE!!
So many reveals—mostly coming from Taehyung, but Jungkook doesn’t often deny them. And it’s mostly Taehyung stroking Jungkook’s hair or laying his head on Jungkook’s thigh or whatever—but Jungkook doesn’t stop him. And Jimin seems totally unbothered by all of it, which is strange because it sort of debunks years of his efforts at fan service.
Yet, clearly THIS cannot be fan service or misdirection.
It can’t just be friends playing games, or a TikTok made for work. It can’t be recording someone without their informed consent for attention. It can’t be going to a concert with other members and sitting in separate rows as friends. Or going to a musical or movie to support friends. Unlike all the things Jungkook has done with Jimin, this has to be Real Love!!
So just to recap:
When the cult had no evidence of Taekook hanging out, they were a private couple.
When the cult had ever-increasing evidence of Taekook hanging out, they were being loud.
When the cult had evidence that Jikook hang out outside of work, that was just fan service.
When the cult had no evidence that Jikook hang out outside of work, that was just fan service getting exposed.
When the cult has evidence that Taehyung has a girlfriend, that’s a punishment.
MARTYRDOM
You see, Jungkook and Taehyung would go on WeLives without permission, remember? And Taehyung set up a dual live chat on Insta and JK didn't seem that into it but he was persuaded. Then they giggled and couldn’t find much to talk about for ten minutes. And Taehyung said he would take full responsibility for it.
And the cult now believes that “taking responsibility” means pretending to be in a heterosexual relationship. Even their insider sasaeng accounts predicted it!
Never mind how mad all of this seems. And it would be one thing if just one or two ideas were far-fetched, like looking at a pair of shoes and making assumptions. But all of it is far-fetched.
Facts do not matter. Because you cannot trust the Authority. You can only trust the In-Group.
And the In-Group sees Signs and Wonders. So the In-Group knows the Real Truth.
The In-Group DECIDES TOGETHER what is real.
They can make entirely fake edits; cosplay; post false witness statements; harass models, coworkers, brands, businesses… they can hire trucks to circle the building with loud speakers, protesting and shouting their truth!!
And anyone who doesn’t believe the Real Truth is a Fake Taekooker.
No disbelievers allowed. Get out of the tribe. Only the faithful can stay in the Tribe.
Right now, you might be asking yourself: Why would you stay in a tribe like this??
Because the dynamic is ever-evolving, which is titillating, and participants get a sense of power, because they are able to help craft the narratives—by being so smart as to see the truth where others are blind sheep—so they can bond over how unique they are.
Plus… TAEKOOK NEEDS THEM.
The boys absolutely depend on their support. You see, Taekookers are the real HEROES here.
They understand the boys like normal people never could. If you know you know, and they are steadfast against any and all lies presented as evidence. They are loyal.
The whole world is against their baby bear and baby bunny!! They are the boys Only Defense. Just take a look at this video of their rallying cry:
If you've got martyrs, you've also got... CRUSADERS.
Yikes, right?
So, here are millions of fans who were lied to, misled, misinformed… They developed relationships over time with people who also believe this misinformation… They get a sense of power in crafting their own reality, in which the objects of their affection are victims and they are the heroes… And the only way to prove themselves worthy of the group is to stalwartly ignore anything that contradicts these narratives.
This is a literal, textbook cult.
Cults use deception, isolation, peer pressure, group-think, and suppression of critical thought. To varying degrees, all Taekook spaces do this too. (And yes, other ships and solos and mantis ALSO rely on these tactics. But I've never seen anything quite so open or pervasive in ARMY like the Taekook cult tactics.)
I feel I should make one thing should be made clear: a LOT of people sincerely believe in Taekook.
But there are also a lot of Taekook content creators who sincerely believe in the money they make off people believing in Taekook.
Like all cults, at the end of the day, it's a scam.
Now there’s evidence of a real relationship, and of course anyone who has invested time and money in Taekook is going to be pushing back—hard.
So how do we navigate this chaos?
Well, most cults end in one of two ways: an FBI raid, or everyone drinks the Kool-Aid and dies.
But more often than not, cults don’t really end so much as fizzle out over years.
Plenty of cults are still alive and well despite amble debunking (Scientology, Q-Anon, Illuminati, flat-Earthers, Larries—what they believe doesn’t really matter; it’s how they believe that makes them a cult.)
Cults are a bit like hydras—you cut off one head, three stronger ones pop back up.
They won't stop. They have to BE STOPPED.
HOW TO DEPROGRAM A CULT
Well, back in the 70s, in the early days of deprogramming, the only thing that was effective was to separate the individual from access to the cult (by kidnapping if you had to), then bombard them non-stop with facts (using imprisonment or restraints if you had to) and eventually they are coerced into re-integration. But none of that is humane or legal by today’s standards.
It also leads to relapses.
Really the only way to deprogram cult conditioning is for a mental health professional to slowly and methodically discredit the cult leader(s) and gently present contradictions.
(How can Jungkook really be in a relationship with Taehyung if he’s always mentioning Jimin? How can Jimin be hurting Taehyung and yet they are on FaceTime for hours, trading fan art and watching tv shows? Why would the two most rich and famous pop stars in the world need a publicity stunt?)
And even then, the cult member has to be sort of able to question things for themselves, and it just helps to have other supportive people echoing their own questioning sentiments back to them.
It can take YEARS until a cult member reaches the breaking point and begins to listen to Out-Group ideas. (On average, five years, to be exact.)
And then they may begin a journey of self-expression, where they openly voice doubts or complaints against cult narratives. They may even engage in transference, jumping off the Taekook ship and onto another (the need for tribe is very real). This is an extremely vulnerable stage and should not be taken advantage of.
At this critical moment when someone is tittering on the fence, trying to figure out what reality is, you need to REWARD THE BEHAVIOR YOU WANT.
You want them to question. You want them to express their grief and doubts. You want them to look for real sources of information.
This is NOT the time to kick someone when they are down, or look for “gotcha” moments to shame them publicly.
If you see a Taekooker wondering if they’ve been lied to this whole time—they HAVE. And that is abuse. And abuse victims need to be handled with care.
I know that Taekookers have dragged Jimin to hell and back for years so I’m not about to preach love and acceptance.
But it’s also fair to say that Taekookers have been gas-lit and realizing that can be traumatic.
Wounded animals are dangerous. A traumatized human lashes out. And you know who the prime target always is. They are already starting to take it to Jimin directly.
I strongly recommend you take a very cautious approach if you engage with them right now. Especially if you’re thinking about arguing with them.
People who defend Jimin or Jikook end up doxxed, suspended, harassed--and someday, I fear a wounded cult member will get physically violent.
Be especially careful because plenty of big accounts are closeted Taekookers. Here's a thread exposing some "mystery cult" members:
THE MOST EFFECTIVE RESPONSE
I normally don’t try to police people or preach too much, but I’m going to give you some unsolicited advice if you managed to read all this:
Don’t go into Taekook tags or spaces. Don’t debate them. Don’t talk trash about them or the members. Don’t slam-dunk or spike the ball with snarky words or memes. Don’t give them a taste of their own medicine. Don’t be cruel.
First of all, don’t do any of that because Jimin and Jungkook would be mortified by it.
But second of all, don’t do it because it just makes them dig in harder; it adds weeks or months to the deprogramming timeline.
The goal is to get the cult out of ARMY fandom. Because they thrive on a victim/hero complex, attacking them reinforces cult dynamics.
I believe there is a better approach.
First, you can and should go Gray Rock whenever possible.
Starve them of oxygen. Don’t acknowledge them. If you do, be generic in your responses—boringly bland, detachedly polite. Ignore them completely; their hot takes do not matter.
Block and report if warranted, but never engage. On some level, they really want to be persecuted for their beliefs. It's why they keep coming into Jikook spaces looking for a fight.
But their beliefs are so ridiculous that they aren’t worth our time. Instead, direct your focus on what you want, which is to promote and celebrate Bangtan.
Second, you can provide what’s called a Graceful Exit.
It doesn’t always work if they know that’s what you’re doing, but it is perhaps the most effective technique, especially if they are already questioning the cult narrative.
You see, a shamed human being gets defensive, doubles down, won’t listen. But a human being offered a Graceful Exit Out of a Bad Place gets to reinvent themselves in a way that allows them some dignity while they change direction.
A Graceful Exit has a few components to it:
��Hello, Taekooker. I also saw a lot of misleading content when I was a baby ARMY. The algorithm feeds you Taekook content almost immediately. Then you make online friends, and they all believe in Taekook. Suddenly everyone is telling you really complicated theories about how Taekook is being hidden. Once you believe that, you have to also believe that Taekook are lying by omission, that Jimin and the members are also lying, that the company executives and translators and managers and staff are all lying, that Korean ARMY is lying, that fellow I-ARMY is lying… and that’s a lot of people spreading a lie for no real gain. Now that you have some evidence that Tae is happily in a relationship with someone else, it’s only natural to question your beliefs, because YES, Taehyung and Jungkook absolutely love each other. But are they IN love? NO. For my part, I trust Taehyung. I love and support Taehyung. I don’t spread the idea that he or Jungkook engage in fake relationships. If you support them, then you’ll accept what they are showing you. When you’re ready to stop shipping Taekook, ARMY will be ready to welcome you back. We can stream together and vote together and help our boys achieve their dreams. We can watch their content and go to concerts together and enjoy fan-works. But what we can’t do is make up really complex stories around BTS’ reality. Our place as fans is to appreciate their music, and let them live their own lives in their own way. It’s time to let go of old ideas, and embrace the new things they share with us.”
This tactic allows the cult member to feel sympathy for being human. It provides understanding that they’ve been deceived. It appeals to their higher nature and love for the objects of their affection. And reassures them they could have a place in a bigger tribe if they let go of the in-group.
It invites them in, instead of calls them out.
Now, you guys might not be willing to do that. Especially considering the hate trains and rape jokes and death threats they gave Jimin for years. Believe me, I get it. I GET IT.
So if you see someone spewing vitriol, now is not the time to call them in. Now is the time to block and report.
However, if I take out my anger on them, it’s serving my own feelings.
And I’m here to serve Jimin, Jungkook, and BTS, not my own need to be right.
So I believe the best way to do that is to Gray Rock the Die-hards and provide a Graceful Exit for the Questioners.
Many cult members are not going to believe in Taennie unless Kim Taehyung makes an announcement directly--and even then, he’ll have to do it in such an emphatic way that they buy what he sells.
So we should accept that the cult is going to be around for a long, long time. Conserve your energy, my dears.
But for the ones who just got fooled but don't intend any harm, we can either hope they let go of their own volition, or we can try to make room for them as part of true ARMY.
What we shouldn’t do is get down in the mud and start slinging. Everyone loses ground that way.
THIS WAS THE LONGEST EVER POST; I AM SORRY!
But these have been my thoughts over the last few days. I’m okay if you want to comment, but I would like to ask that you DO NOT reblog to tag Taekook and that you don’t weaponize this post by spreading it around specifically where it could cause drama.
Drama is the exact opposite of my intention.
My desire is to provide some better understanding around how cults work and how to disband them.
In conclusion: Keep it classy. Ignore assholes. Be gentle with people recovering from gas-lighting. Stay true to the principles of BTS and ARMY. Apobangpo.
Love, Roo
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✩ ‧₊˚ ✩𝐬𝐚𝐤𝐮𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬𝐞 𝐦𝐮𝐬𝐢𝐜 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧𝐬 ✧·˚ ༘ * ༄
✧·˚feat: kayson mayer, jonah, xanthus claiborne, andrew marston, issac rhoades, elias, zaros athat'lin, luca pearce, rowan
✧·˚summary: this is basically just my headcanons of what kind of music each character listens to and their favorite albums since saku only really listens to soundtracks and can’t really tell what they would like (that is a joke btw i know you also listen to some kpop)
✧·˚a/n: music is a very important thing to me so i hope i did everyone justice and feel free to add your opinions as well!
kayson mayer ✧·˚ ༘ * ༄
favorite albums:
you never walk alone - bts . fine line - harry styles . hard to imagine the neighborhood ever changing - the neighborhood
okay hear me out, i definitely think kayson would be a kpop fan, not like a kpop stan more of a “i enjoy their music” more than anything. i feel like kayson isn’t huge on music but he love the slower stuff when he’s not at practice or trying to get pumped up for volleyball. he seems to have more of a moody taste in music in contrast to his more up beat personality, but i mean we all gotta cry over something.
jonah ✧·˚ ༘ * ༄
favorite albums:
HIT ME HARD AND SOFT - billie eilish . currents - tame impala . brat - charli xcx
this bitch definitely loves billie eilish. only man i know that definitely cries to ‘what was i made for?’ besides kayson maybe. he fucks heavy with tame impala, but not in the master manipulator why that other man fuck with it. he loves having them on in the background of streams mostly. hyper pop king, loves charli xcx and he is having a brat summer. he is definitely on tiktok so much and is very much influenced by what’s trending on the app.
xanthus claiborne ✧·˚ ༘ * ༄
favorite albums:
THE TORTURED POETS DEPARTMENT - taylor swift . firebird suite - igor stravinsky . preacher’s daughter - ethel cain
LISTEN OKAY xanthus is the kind to never admit that he would listen to taylor swift but god damn it he loves her new album and her slower stuff she is his guilty pleasure artist for sure. okay he loves classical music but like classical music don’t really have ‘albums’ per say so i chose his favorite piece. firebird suite is something that he has adored the story that is told through the music, same with ethel cain’s preachers daughter. he loves how the music is telling a story more than anything.
andrew marston ✧·˚ ༘ * ༄
favorite albums:
something to give each other - troye sivan . being funny in a foreign language - the 1975 . harry styles - harry styles
do you feel the rush andrew? sorry. i think honestly he has always loved troye sivan, might be the repressed gay in him but who knows. a full really fond of being funny in a foreign language, loves how raw the whole album is and enjoys the slower ballads. loves the debut album of harry styles, it’s just so soft and sweet he really likes listening to it.
issac rhoades ✧·˚ ༘ * ༄
favorite albums:
cry - cigarettes after sex . laurel hell - mitski . did you know that there’s a tunnel under ocean blvd - lana del ray
bro is depressed. like i don’t know what you were expecting with him. he knows that most of the songs on the cry album are very sad but some are very sweet and he like the mix of the two. mommy issues up the wazoo so of course he listens to mitski. lana del ray is new and a bit more positive of a listen, it’s almost like someone special came into his life and change the outlook of it a bit.
elias ✧·˚ ༘ * ༄
favorite albums:
who really cares - tv girl . star boy - the weeknd . positions - ariana grande
something about this tv girl album just screams elias to me and i think he would really enjoy this album the most out of the others. of course he loves the weeknd just look at him, he is a starboy and a party monster on the weekends. this bitch loves ariana grande’s positions album so much he created a stan twitter just to defend it against the haters.
zaros athat'lin ✧·˚ ༘ * ༄
favorite albums:
the rise and fall of a midwest princess - chappell roan . MEGAN - megan thee stallion . GUTS (spilled) - olivia rodrigo
was it casual when you fought my claim? he loves chappell roan and will definitely tell you he listened to her before she blew up which in his defense he did but he doesn’t need to keep telling people that. loves megan thee stallion her new album is what he listens too before he insults the fuck outta earis. loves the range of emotions he feels when listening to olivia rodrigo, i’m convinced he’s just a teenage girl.
luca pearce ✧·˚ ༘ * ༄
favorite albums:
songs - adrianne lenker . teenage dream - katy perry . MAP OF THE SOUL : PERSONA - bts
soft baby child loves soft songs that can put his ass to sleep in less than fifteen minutes. katy perry is his favorite, teenage dream got him through college and continues to make him romanticize the crap out of his relationship, as he should! he loves kpop, i just feel it in my bones that he loves persona and how happy the album is.
rowan ✧·˚ ༘ * ༄
favorite albums:
louder than bombs - the smiths . AM - arctic monkeys . the game - queen
he loves music that you could find in an old vinyl record store and these albums capture his taste perfectly in my opinion. a bit of indie here and alt rock there and you’ve got a rowan playlist that he will put on anytime he drives you anywhere.
∘₊✧──────✧₊∘
this is where i would put my glittery divider but i can’t add anymore photos lmao
.love always <3 pearl
.masterlist
#pearl’s ❤︎ works#zsakuva#sakuverse#zsakuva fan fic#zsakuva audio#zsakuva headcanons#zsaku#sakuverse headcanons#zsaku fan fic#zsaku headcanons#zsakuva elias#zsakuva isaac#zsakuva xanthus#sakuverse zaros#sakuverse andrew marston#sakuverse jonah#sakuverse isaac#sakuverse elias
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Favorite Musicals of Each Order of the Knights Radiant
We’ve already considered their favorite boardgames. But what about when it’s time to go to a musical? Which musical is preferred by each order?
1. Skybreakers: Les Misérables
They think Javert is the protagonist.
Szeth: Is it not strange that the musical continues for so long after the death of the protagonist?
Nale: Ah, but it is only thus that we see the real tragedy.
Nale: As all of the lawbreakers go on living, without punishment, due the the lawman not being willing to fulfill his duty.
Joret: It’s so horrifying.
Cali: Yes, hence the title.
2. Bondsmiths: West Side Story
It’s about two warring gangs being brought together.
Dalinar: Although it is sad, it is nice that it ends with all of the previously estranged people bonding over their loss.
Navani: And it really is through music that two warring sides can be brought together--perhaps even feel love for each other.
Dalinar: Yes.
Dalinar: Wait, what?
3. Edgedancers: Little Shop of Horrors
Or at least, it’s Lift’s favorite.
Lift: I dunno why Wyndle doesn’t like it--it’s about a plant!
Lift: A hungry plant too, so it has something in common with both of us!
Wyndle: I--
Wyndle: Never--
Wyndle: That--
Wynde: IT WAS SO HORRIFYING, MISTRESS!!!
Lift: It’s kinda in the title, dude.
4. Stonewards: The 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee
They were surprised at how invested they got.
Badali: It may not be warfare, yet the efforts of these children are so inspiring.
Zu: They truly do fight until there is only one standing.
5. Elsecallers: A Little Night Music
Jasnah just thinks it’s neat.
Jasnah: I have to respect the effort of composing each song in 3/4 time.
6. Lightweavers: Phantom of the Opera
It’s about art, tortured souls, disguises...
Gaz: I gotta feel bad for the Phantom.
Shallan: What, because his love for Christine is doomed?
Vathah: Because it would suck to live in a sewer?
Gaz: Well sure.
Gaz: But also that one-sided mask.
Gaz: He must always feel like there’s something there in the darkness, something just out of his sight.
Shallan: ...
Vathah: ...
Gaz: N-Not that I would know anything about that, ha ha!
7. Truthwatchers: Lion King
They went for the costumes and ended up being blown away by the story.
Rlain: If Simba had just told the truth about his father’s death, all of that could have been avoided.
Stump: Yeah, well, kids are pretty stupid sometimes.
Renarin: Although by running away, Simba did get to be raised by two awesome gay dads, so that’s nice!
Stump: ...
Renarin: What?
8. Willshapers: Scarlet Pimpernel
It’s about rescuing innocent (?) aristocrats from being imprisoned and guillotined!
Eshonai: It is truly inspiring to see a group of humans working so hard to free other humans before their unjustified deaths.
Venli: That Madame Guillotine song is really catchy though.
Eshonai: Yeah, you almost can almost understand the killing there.
9. Dustbringers: Wicked
They appreciate the overall message.
Malata: Yeah, there really are two sides to every story!
Ral-na: And just because a power is popularly deemed destructive, that does not mean it is so.
10. Windrunners: Also Wicked
Although their reasoning is...different.
Bridge Four, in their barracks: SO IF YOU CARE TO FIND ME / LOOK TO THE WESTERN SKY
Bridge Four: AS SOMEONE TOLD ME LATELY / EVERYONE DESERVES THE CHANCE TO FLY!
Bridge Four: AND IF I’M FLYING SOLO / AT LEAST I’M FLYING FREEEE
Bridge Four: TO THOSE WHO’D GROUND ME / TAKE A MESSAGE BACK FROM MEEEEE
Bridge Four: TELL THEM HOW I AM DEFYING GRAVITY / I’M FLYING HIGH, DEFYING GRAVITY!
Kaladin (wiping away a tear): It’s just such a good song.
#cosmere#cosmerelists#stormlight archive#Nale#Szeth#Cali#Joreth#Dalinar#Navani#Kaladin#Malata#Ral-na#Rlain#Renarin#Stump#Lift#Wyndle#Jasnah#Shallan#Vathah#Gaz#Badali#Zu#Venli#Eshonai
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As someone who never understood the hype around Take Me To Church and keeps forgetting that song even exists, can I ask the fans what exactly it is you like about that song? Because my current hypothesis is that yall were around 14 when it came out and music just hits different when you're 14. What else is there to like, genuinely
I try to stay unbiased here but Hozier is one of the only musicians I allow myself to be pretentious about, so before i info dump about why i love take me to church here's some other hozier songs you should give a shot:
francesca [i'd go through hell again just to hold you one more time], nina cried power [song about activism and black activists], swan upon leda [about the violence of colonialism, misogyny, and religious bigotry], eat your young [about the violence of war, capitalism, and generational trauma], movement, to noise making (sing), shrike, NFWMB [sexy], sunlight
anyway take me to church is so much more than just “loving you is like church”. he starts off by telling us how happy his lover makes him, despite constantly being told by The Church he was born sick and his happiness is a result of sinful behavior. he rejects the religion being forced on him, because unlike christianity, his church doesn't force him to accept absolution to reach heaven ("my church offers no absolutes / she tells me, 'worship in the bedroom' / the only heaven I'll be sent to / is when i'm alone with you"). the last two lines of the first verse-- "i was born sick, but i love it / command me to be well"-- questions why a god would create us to be inherently sick only to punish us for being sick.
i see the the chorus as a smart-ass comparison of his relationship to christianity. The Church expects him to blindly worship their lies and confess his sins, which he knows will be used against him ("take me to church / i'll worship like a dog at the shrine of your lies / i'll tell you my sins and you can sharpen your knife"), but he's supposed to accept this and devote his life to God so he can get to heaven ("offer me that deathless death / oh good god, let me give you my life"). by offering to do this for his lover, he's equating their love to religion.
in the second verse, he reiterates that he worships his lover with a metaphor ("if i'm a pagan of the good times / my lover's the sunlight"). the subtle remark of referring to the ancient practice of paganism as "the good times" comments on the colonization and forced conversion of ireland by christian england, which criminalized paganism. immediately after stating how his lover demands a sacrifice, he hungrily eyes the high horse The Church sits on, and questions what power they have over him and his people ("that's a fine lookin' high horse / what you got in the stable? / we've a lot of starving faithful"). this could also be a reference to the irish potato famine, which was not a result of drought, but of english lords forcing the irish to turn over their entire crop to send to england.
then we get the most poetic description of sex i've ever heard: "no masters or kings when the ritual begins / there is no sweeter innocence than our gentle sin / in the madness and soil of that sad earthly scene / only then, i am human / only then, i am clean". fuck man
a lot of gay people with religious trauma love this song bc of everything i described above. also, it's a fuckin banger.
and yes i was 14 when it came out. what about it
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Socra’s Naruto Liveblog, Ep 71-80
Ep 71:
-Temari is so cool
-so like I feel like the show is really glossing over Orochimaru bringing people’s souls back from the dead
-I get that they have to have a super cool all-out Hokage vs Hokages fight, but wouldn’t the first and second Hokages be limited by the chakra reserves of their “hosts”? (Since it’s explained that their souls are in other people’s bodies)
- I like that the three Hokages have different elemental styles that they use
-so like what even is Orochimaru’s deal. Like apparently he was/is human, but also he’s kinda not??? I need some backstory for him or something right about now
Ep 72:
-I wonder how much Temari’s fan weighs
-with how often substitutions and clones are used, I really feel like people need to be WAY more wary of the possibility that the person they’re fighting isn’t the real one
-the show heard my call for more Orochimaru lore and answered it and WOW is it fucked up
-not the Hokage summoning fucking DEATH
-ngl that montage and monologue at the end of the episode showing the people of Konoha got me emotional (the music was also really good), that’s definitely one of my favorite moments from the show so far
Ep 73:
-good on Jiraiya for helping to defend the village but also I find it hilarious that his way of fighting so far has just been summoning giant toads
-damn so the Hokage basically made a deal with the devil, huh
-yay I want to see Kankuro fight more
-YEAH SHINO GET YOUR SCREENTIME
-I like that we can’t see Shino’s eyes, even at angles where we theoretically should be able to
-I’m hyped for this Shino vs Kankuro fight ngl
Ep 74:
-it’s hard to make Sasuke look completely normal and well-adjusted, but Gaara is so incredibly edgy that he somehow does it
-Shino made a clone out of bugs instead of using a clone jutsu or substitution? Call that “bugstitution” (I’m so funny I know)
-I feel so bad for saying this but I really don’t care about how Konohamaru is doing right now
-ugh Iruka my king I missed you
-Orochimaru and the Hokage are basically playing tug of war with Orochimaru’s soul lol
-JESUS CHRIST GAARA
-Shino hanging upside-down from bug tendrils was really cool actually
-welp Kankuro’s definitely gonna develop a fear of bugs after this
-Shino is such a badass, I know Kankuro’s poison knocked him out but he definitely won that battle
-it’s monumentally funny to me that Gaara is this raging monster but he’s also still a tiny kid. Just a lil guy.
Ep 75:
-someone get Gaara a Tylenol asap
-every time Sasuke calls himself an “avenger” I die inside a little from secondhand embarrassment
-NARUTO TO THE RESCUE!!!
Ep 76:
-I feel bad for Sasuke but also I couldn’t look at him being hunched over in pain without thinking of that one meme about people projecting period pain onto characters
-again, Gaara needs some Tylenol
-baby Gaara with his giant raccoon eyes was so cute
-I was feeling depressed over Gaara and then Gai came on screen and I just started grinning, I love him so much
-I already knew almost all of Gaara’s backstory that was shown in this episode but god is it still putting me through the emotional wringer. He was just a hurt little kid and he wanted loveeeeeee
Ep 77:
-okay so I do know that Yashamaru lied to Gaara about hating him but I don’t remember why and I really can’t figure it out. Like sir why are you telling this very emotionally damaged child something that will just make his mental state worse????
-I feel like Gaara’s advanced fox form could have looked a lot cooler than it does, it looks super awkward and clunky in a lot of shots
-I hate how we keep having little interludes of Orochimaru and the Hokage having their standoff. Like nothing has actually happened with them in a while but the show has to remind us that they exist I guess
-me @ Naruto: don’t you just wanna go apeshit?
Ep 78:
-Naruto PLEASE stop sticking stuff up people’s butts
-awww Sasuke actually cares
-it’s funny how shook Sasuke is by Naruto’s fighting
-I fully did not expect the giant toad to fight using a fucking SWORD
-why does Shukaku sound so goofy lmao
-FOX FIGHT
Ep 79:
-it cut away from Naruto and Gaara and I thought it was going to cut to Orochimaru and the Hokage for the fiftieth time and I was about to be so annoyed, but then it cut to Gai and Kakashi and I was like aw hell yeah
-…and then it cut to Orochimaru and the Hokage afterwards anyways (although given what happens at the end of this episode it was actually completely justified this time)
-I completely forgot Hayate died ngl
-YO WE GET TO SEE THE PARENTS FIGHTING HELL YEAH
-holy shit Shadow Strangle jutsu is cool
-shoutout to Kiba’s mom. Why is she the only ninja parent who’s not a man
-also random thought: Kiba’s mom’s dog talks but I’m pretty sure Akamaru never does, so is there a reason for that or is it just random?
-anyways I don’t know if we ever get to see people’s non-ninja parents but it’s a little funny that almost all the kids with known ninja parents (Shikamaru, Choji, Ino, Kiba, Neji) look extremely similar to said ninja parents. Like the non-ninja parents’ genes really didn’t try
-Hinata is kinda the exception, which makes sense for her character. And with Shino and his dad it’s obviously a little hard to tell
-aww Shino’s dad saved him <3
-wow Naruto really won that fight with a headbutt lmao
-rip Lord Hokage, I’m still not sure what I think of you but I guess you were cool????
-the last thing the Hokage saw before he died being young Orochimaru was interesting. Like he still desperately wanted to see the humanity in him or something
Ep 80:
-it was right before a serious moment but seeing Naruto wiggle his way over to Gaara made me chuckle
-I like that Naruto flashes back to Haku even though that part of the story is long over, it gives the sense that the story is one continuous arc rather than multiple different arcs
-aw Gaara apologized to his siblings😭
-so uhhh is Sasuke just fine after overusing his chidori and dealing with the curse mark flaring up again??? I feel like there was a lack of proper consequences there
-I know I was supposed to be sad during the funeral scene but Iruka hugging Konohamaru made me soft, I love him so much he’s so full of care and good and hchdhshsjsjaka
-I really liked seeing a montage of all the kids having moments with the Hokage, it really added to the whole “the village is a family” thing
-OH SHIT ITACHI’S HERE
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