#kinda dont know if i love this part
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“he was mentally ill. this monster was a- was a sick fantasy. a product of his dementia.”
“…i saw it too. does that make me disturbed? demented? does… that make me sick too?”
#txf#the x files#dana scully#fox mulder#folie a deux#this episode … this EPISODE!!!!!!#genuinely so indicative of how much they trust each other….#between mulder just . having to rely on scully for the last part of the ep#scully thinking he’s off his fucking rocker and still looking into what he asks her to look into bc she TRUSTS him . bc she LOVES him !!!!#and maybe he’s a little nuts but goddamnit she will at least check it out !! just in case he’s right!!!#AND she lies for him all the time . i mean she always does this whenever he decides to go nuts But specifically in this ep…#looks skinner in the eye and goes . yea man im totally fully with mulder on this . and he’s definitely not being weird and i definitely kno#what’s going on with him#she lies for mulder all the time its soooo…#anyways . drawing wise this drove me nuts i hate drawing mulder . he’s so hard for me to draw#they’re kinda kirie and shuichi coded in the bottom part but . well . why not . might as well be#ALSOOO i chose that quote for the bottom bc . well . does she think he’s crazy? like actually for real?#i feel like every time scully talks about mulder (up to season five at least as thats where im at) its contained in some way?#in her reports . to family . to skinner . to mulder !#i think the only time she’s Really honest is in the confessional but even then…#bc its not like she’s against speaking her mind . i mean generally and situational but for ppl she’s close to she usually isnt#but when it comes to mulder it always feels contained and like she’s making excuses for him (he is always her exception .#llike whenevrr he gets some disease or affliction or whatever she ALWAYS jumps to going ‘but well… sometimes there’s this excuse’ and she#does this w a lot considering shes science focused but w mulder shes always like . well he ISNT crazy because uhhhh .#this hyperspecific scenario that is in no fuckin way the case)#but does she think he’s crazy? does HE think she thinks he’s crazy?#is he asking about this specific case or is he asking in general? over the entirety of the show?#its been five years scully. is he crazy? sick? demented?#has this all been a sick fantasy fueled by mental illness? youre the doctor scully . surely you have the answer?#anyways i dont think she knows . and if that is the case — what does that mean for her?
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cassandra & clytemnestra
class doodles <3
cassandra: super proud of how she turned out!! i love noses so much and ive managed to give her a really glorious one today. she got a few compliments too hehe
clytemnestra: idk how well ive managed to depict it lol but cly is both mourning iphigenia and planning out her vengeance. its going to be a long 10 years but she will have her killers blood.
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i still have a long way to go till i finish the iliad so i dont know everyones story yet, i do know however that cly like many before and after her arent often portrayed with the complexities that make them them, that make them human, but instead as paragons or pariahs. and i think theres lots to be said on the matter, but i dont want to get ahead of myself lol. anyway enjoy :D
#cassandra#cassandra of troy#kassandra#greek mythology#paris the musical#the iliad#my muffin#i love her so much#yall dont even know#clytemnestra#tragic mother figures of the mythos#they could never make me hate you#as i understand it she neglected her kids in favour of iphigenia. which isnt great parenting#so she isnt free of sin#and yet between her and agamemnon its quite clear who ruined more lives.#or is it?#(or is it?)#jokes aside lol#im still reading & learning but there seems to be a big divide between the mythos and modern perception#influenced by pop culture and adaptations sure but also a lack of critical thinking and the innitative to go fact check for oneself#which is several essays on its own lol#kinda lost where i was going with this :')#✨nuance✨#and go read the source materials pls#godbless#my art#my ramblings#everyone is entitled to their opinion#this is (part of) mine#pls feel more than free to share ur own thoughts and stuff
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Toxic Yaoi
#its definitely one sided ON JIM'S PART.#the office us#the office#dwight schrute#jim halpert#i think Jim is like bi or something but he just doesn't see liking men as a real possiblity for him#so even though he most definitely has had feelings for men he just ignores them and chalks them up to bromance nd stuff#but then with Dwight we know that they went on sales calls all the time and used to get along just fine#and im thinking after awhile Jim started realizing the true nature of his feelings#like i dont think he fully thought “i am gay or something” i just think he started to realize the way he thought abt dwight wasn't “normal”#and he was a bit peaved like wth is Dwight's deal? nd i think thats when he started playing his pranks#and he worked up the idea that Dwight “deserved it”#and i don't think Jim's feelings for Pam are fake but i don't think its a coincidence that most of his favorite things abt her involve dwigt#like his way of impressing her and making her laugh is picking on Dwight#the moment he knew he loved her was when she introduced dwight to him (kinda??)#and when Pam starts to be buddies with dwight hes like freaked out#this guy has this weird obsessive hatred towards dwight who hasn't really done anything besides be a bit weird#and they become sorta friends after like SEVEN seasons but Dwight does NOT want his ass#but theres still moments that give a small part of jim some hope like THAT FUCKING SCENE BEFORE JIMS PERFORMANCE AT THE SABRE STORE LIKE OMG#im talking too much in tags ill probly make a follow up post#dont show this to my irls guys#jwight#jim x dwight#schrupert
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if i just told you i love you would this world change
#witch hat tag#orufrey#these kinda suck lol i feel like i cant draw right now *irritated sigh* BUT I FEEL EMOTIONS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#if you are gay go watch good omens season 2 right now. NO YOU DONT KNOW THO!!!!!!!!!#i know being this affected by good omens is probably cringe. I dont care any more. the last 1 minute of good omens season 2 was#some of the most affecting acting i've ever seen in my life. sometimes someone acts with the force as if their entire career led to that#like during the credits part the very end im not even talking about before that. holy god#aziraphale i know everything about you. i know what you are feeling right now. i can see everything on your face. we're going to make it#ER.... NOT THAT THIS HAS ANYTHING TO DO WITH THIS POST. IT'S NOT SPOILERS !!!!!!!!!!!!!#I JUST FEEL THOROUGHLY CHANGED !!!!!!!!!!! SHIT GETS REAL FROM NOW ON.. LIKE IN GENERAL! IN MY LIFE!#tormented gay love tormented gay love TORMENTED GAY LOVE TORMENTED GAY LOVE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#btw the first 3 images were drawn earlier with an entirely different feeling and an entirely different mood.#Why do you keep pulling away from me?#It is because i love you that i do this#the lyrics from one of my japanese orufrey songs (A SONG THAT THE CREATOR LISTENS TO!!!!) led to feelings#“あなたが知らない��を残さず見ててほしいの” but i'm not translating it cause it just sounds weird. if with his eyes oru's asking “WHY don't you want#to let me in? to see all of you?“ those lyrics are like ”I actually want you to see every last bit of the parts of me you don't know“#oru you have no idea how much i want to lay bare my whole soul for you#maybe it's an alternate version of chapter 40. to me#i need to draw something really fucking good or i'm not going to forgive myself. i will not rest in this life#until i have made the orufrey that fully satisfies me nor until i have seen what the manga is leading to#NO STORY MEANS ANYTHING WITHOUT TORMENTED GAY LOVE AT THE HEART OF IT. THATS THE HEART OF THIS WORLD!!!!!#........... so Hi im normal :) haha *goes and finally makes breakfast*
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the thing is abt the joenicky wouldn't have stopped searching take is that like. they're not Better Than andy / quynh and they don't necessarily love each other More. i find it interesting to examine the idea that THEY think they couldn't have stopped but ultimately because it's not them i think they'd have no way of understanding andy's position + circumstance would've made them stop in the end. again like in my tag rant i think they're both too concerned with the greater good. they would not place each other over that. in the end.
#i feel like i misphrased my codependency comment i dont actually think that. i do think they have a very specific (interesting) dynamic of#coming into immortality together and so i think they literally don't know what to do w/out each other (ties into greg's comment of them#never really being apart). i think they're like. inextricably part of each other and i do think separating them would fuck them both up#astronomically. but like. in my iron maiden joe prequel nicky is the one who actually decides to end the search#andy and quynh push him towards it but it's his choice. the same way in my post iron maiden quynh fic andy eventually chooses to end it#but i don't think it's a decision they WOULDN'T make.#this also ties into my they would not give up the world for each other. i think they think they would. but they wouldn't#mostly because i find 'would sacrifice the world for the one they love' kinda dull but i think both of them love people too much.#if it happened and they didn't know whether the other was alive they would probably devote themselves extra to helping people#because what else can they do. esp nicky i think he would need purpose above all else#neon has thoughts#ANYWAY. i have a lot of thoughts. i need to start iron maiden joe prequel / cypress shadow again. this will fix me
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Man I gotta be one of the most boring/basic ninjago fans to reside in this Fandom. Like I don't ship anything that's not cannon like lava or plasma (I only ship jaya, garmsako and sometimes lloykita). I don't have any crazy hcs or artwork to show and I'm not even someone who likes the things everyone likes, like lloyd having inhuman traits like horns and a tail- I don't even vibe with the hc that he used to have red eyes!!
Like I'm sorry I'm basic man, I'm just here chilling in my cannon bubble thinking about how cool the outside world is.
#i dont even have Sexuality hcs for them or anything#ok the inhuman traits one is kinda a lie cause i LOVE IT when lloyd is drawn with little fangs but thats about it#i go back amd forth with liking something then disliking it. if you see me reblog or make a dad lloyd post only to make a post about how i-#dont like it 2 days later just know thats part of the course with me#or like any other popular hc that i hate and love in cycles.#ninjago#lego ninjago#ninjago lego#lloyd garmadon
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Breaking my silence, I love both interpretations that Ochako had genuine feelings for Izuku but pushed the feelings so far down due to her commitment to her duty that she believed that following those feelings would be a reflection of her capability as a hero and only allowed herself to break from her expectations of herself in the last chapter
AND that Ochako never had genuine feelings for Izuku and only believed she did because of comphet and accidentally twisted her deep admiration for him for being the exact hero and person she strove to be into a false feeling of romantic intent
#toga plays a huge part in both of these btw but thats a story for another day#i mean.... i might go into that who knows#BUT IM TIRED OF SEEING PEOPLE FIGHT OVER THIS INTERPRETATION LIKE THERES ONLY ONE RIGHT ANSWER I DONT CAREEEEEEE#THEYRE BOTH GOOD THEYRE BOTH INTERESTING THEY BOTH PLAY A SUBTLE BUT HUGE PART OF HER CHARACTER#I LOVE THEM BOTH#I LOVE OCHAKO AND HER NEVER ENDING ESCAPE FROM COMPLEXITY AS A PROPER CHATACTER SHOULD!!#bnha#mha#my hero acedamia#boku no hero acedamia#uraraka ochako#ochako uraraka#mha chapter 431#midoriya izuku#izuku midoriya#izuocha#togachako#<- kinda??#that mighr not be directly in the post but with both of those interpretations i believe that is there
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its so hard to watch time pass when things like careers and assignments exist. what do you mean im supposed to take that seriously
#I have an assignment that was due a week ago and I really really dont want to do it. I have to but i dont want to#im probably making it worse because my brain has built a wall around it so now i can’t do literally anything else until thats done. but#because I don’t want to do it I’m just kinda stuck. turns out this is what they meant when they said emotional regulation is part of#exec dysfunction.. I’ll have a thought like if I get a little bit of it done now i can get it over with. I can just submit something#and then not even 5 minutes later itll be like ugh but I have to draw all the assets out. I have to write things and make spreads ugh#and its just flopping between those two things. i hate it when ppl are like well how much time do you need to work on one thing#because BOY id love to know too. I’d love to know exactly when my brain wants to cooperate with me and work around that but I cant#even my period can’t decide when it wants to punch me in the stomach. which is kinda funny in the grand scheme of things but still#its so weird im just lying on my bed thinking abt all this like damn.. the time will pass anyways no matter what I decide to do.. damn….#if I submit that assignment now and take the L I literally won’t die. it’ll just be a deduction on an assignment nobody will ask me about#I know this but I’m still stressing myself about it so my thoughts aren’t really connecting to my body. weird#maybe its because Im having a hard time looking forward to things. theres definitely a lot I should be living for but I don’t really feel#a strong attachment to it I guess? it’s been like this for a while with holidays and meeting with friends so I just don’t#I kinda figured its because im pretty passionless and its more like passing interest. but it’s not very fun when it feels like I’m going to#be living distraction to distraction for the next 70 years or so lol#idk it kind of feels like slowly bleeding out. which is funny because I actually did experience blood loss this week#had a 30 minute nosebleed and literally could not stand. also it felt like someone was pinching the back of my brain which was interesting#yapping#does this count as vent#vent#Ive just been making an oc carrd and contemplate changing my blog header for the past 3 days honestly
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friend notoriously bad at videogames said shed play marvel rivals with me tomorrow chat if i never post after tomorrow night its because a blood vessel bursted
#marvel rivals#snap chats#AT LEAST WE’LL HAVE OUR OTHER FRIEND THERE BUT god.#she funny as hell she just suddenly called me and was like ‘i saw your twitter. do you wanna play marvel rivals tomorrow’#and then she proceeds to be like ‘wait so who do you main. other than magneto’ Motherfucker with a capital M#NO I SWEAR IM NOT A ONE TRICK i really like wanda hawkeye and jeff….#NO SHE SAID ONE MORE THING SHE WAS LIKE ‘wait are charles and magneto the same guy’ and she tries to Just Kidding her wait outta it#Note whenever she says Just Kidding she’s trying to cover her ass I PROMISE I WAS LIKE /KAYLA. BE SERIOUS./#and then she was like ‘who’s the friendlier one of the two’#and then i had to hit her with the Technically People Think Theyre Both Varying Degrees Of Asshole. however charles probably wont bite you#and THEN SHE WAS LIKE ‘ok well you should draw magneto surprising charles with jollibees’ AND I. NO SHE THINKS MY EXISTENCE SURROUNDS JB#AND THIS GAL HAD THE GAUL TO BE LIKE ‘oh do you know how to make it since its a big part of your culture’#i was flabbergasted frankly. ‘oh you guys really like jollibees so you know how to make it right’ i screamed#LIKE ????ISJAJSJSJSJ i cant stress the anomaly this girl is i wish you all could meet her so you understand me#AND LIKE SURE I LOVE JBS but she only ever mentions puto and jollibees to me like kayla. there is more to PH culture than that sjKakss#its really funny with the ??? shit she says i cant lie#she was all ‘oh is the winter soldier in the game ? you should play him hes cool :) and from jersey :) ok well his actor is but—‘ LIKE DKSKS#‘snap arent you being a little mean’ no trust and believe AND I HAVE WITNESSES#i have stupid amounts of stories with her. like she tried to excuse being dumb by sayin shes a capricorn#we’re literally both capricorns and she was born two days before me I Cannot. Do You Understand Me.#anyways. she said i should stream me playing rivals would anyone care about that#i kinda wanted to …. i think it’d be fun…. plus i miss streaming :(#ok byebye for now my bros almost home and i said id let him play so i could work on comms#i mean thats assuming he wants to play. if not uhhhhhhh#anyways BYE. ill tell yall how the game goes tomorrow night if i dont die of a stroke#again at least our other friend’ll be there so someone can laugh at my pain
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im personally very bad at the whole “you should have many different characters with very different personalities that showcase different types of people”-thing because i create my characters solely for myself. and whether or not those characters have differing personalities or very similar ones is not in my hands because i just make what i like and use what i get attached to
#unfortunately i continuously draw cute characters the most so most of my ocs are very cute/happy#I say unfortunately because while it doesnt make me upset that most of my characters are like that it kinda. makes me a bit bothered?#agitated? with myself. like i just feel a bit stuck in this part of art#i love cute stuff but I just as equally. if not even more enjoy weird and disturbing and a bunch of other types of media#i enjoy kiddish things but i also love just like. other things too. but i feel like because most of my stuff is cute i *have* to only make#and enjoy cute stuff. idk. it sounds a bit dumb to me now that i write it down#its just i love characters that are weird or eccentric or not the best/downright bad people but i just cant bring myself to come up with#too many ideas for them that let me use them constantly#“cute and cuddly” is one of the many things i enjoy but its not “ME” or the only thing i enjoy ever. yknow?#i want to be able to speak to people without my art being the sole thing they think of me by or use to gauge how i act. i guess#i dont even know if any of this is intelligible but its whatever. just trying to get my thoughts out idk
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tragic actual play siblings…
#d20#fantasy high#a crown of candy#acoc#taz#taz balance#abernant sisters#rocks sisters#taaco twins#d20 spoilers#mine#dont be weird on this post. please. -_-#looking back at acoc for these screenshots... lets just say theres a pair of codependent twins here and it aint taako and lup#but like more on ruby’s side tbh bc jet does have an identity outside of her but ruby kinda doesnt#theres a post abt how jet was the most impactful death possible bc if itd been ruby it wouldve solidified jets arc#but when ruby’s the survivor she’s just left lost and unmoored bc jet really was part of her#ruby & saccharina are especially tragic to me bc if jet hadnt died ruby wouldve loved her!! she couldve had a sister!! 2 sisters!!#but jet dying was necessary for her to enter the story at all bc of the nature of the medium... she was always doomed to be an outsider#the ‘you are my heart’ line is so good so sweet i love it so much#but what lup says immediately afterward… knowing whats coming in the very next ep… one of biggest dramatic irony moments in the show for me#& it will always bother me that taako is green on the taz transcripts HE’S BLUEEE (<- his vibe NOT his skin)
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#drawing wyll.<3#i want 2 finish this but sharing rn bc i like his tummy. camp outfit 4tw#but ialso dk wtf the composition is. or sujpposed to be HAHAHG#i kinda jst started drawing .whats happening u say? idk dont ask me#i think i just wanted 2 draw this part. (hand ovr mouth emoji)#bg3#wyll ravengard#lg doodles#wyll#URGG>rGAAAH II LOVE HIM SOOOO MUCHHH#seen so many vids of ppl like omg i keep rmancing asta/rion each time i cant stopp^__^! ME W WYLL I CANTTT I CANT#like i want to try karlach and shadowheart at some point but i always go back 2 him#u know in act 3 when u go 2 the circus and u can get ur like.. what is it.ur compatibility or whatever read#yah............. so sweet T__T
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Yo so I'm confused
How do I tell if I'm poly and a little bit in love with all of my close friends or if I'm aromantic and just love everyone platonically
#im having an identity crisis#i dont know what i feel anymore#i mean i had BIG crushes when i was a kid so i kinda doubt im aro but idk??#i havent been getting this type of crushes since like 15?#why feelings so confusing#i thought i have at least this part figured out#and now turns out i dont know neither my gender nor my sexuality nor my romantic attraction#what even is this#i know i dont need to labal myself but i feel like itd be very helpful for my relationships#cause i feel like im hurting people i love somehow#djnfjfjgjgjfkdmdn#im sorry guys it will happen again#rehn rambles
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#whump#whumpblr#whump community#polls#i love these specific polls lol but its actually kinda hard to come up with options#dont actually know if these are specific enough that most ppl wont chose more than one lmao but whatever#its several for me but thats how i picked the options#by having an account i mean specifically made for whump or interacting with the community#ive seen one other whump themed specific poll but most of the options there were about ocs and writing#so i wanted to try making one for the part of the community im most familiar with#ive had an account for 4+ years and liked it before age 10 and watched 5+ media for one actor#i did whumptober 4 consecutive times but only completed twice#and i watch some non-english media but not a lot compared to english media#anyway hope this is fun :)
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a king enjoying a relaxing bath
i dont have anything else i just wanted to draw my sweet nerevar taking a bath fsr. pls enjoy proof i can in fact do backgrounds if i am forced to (to varying degrees of success)
bonus:
#nerevar#indoril nerevar#morrowind#tesblr#morrowind art#my art#hes just soooooooo cute#i love him#what do you think hes thinkin about#i wanna play with his hair. it looks like fun#also wet hair is just kinda fun to draw esp nerevars#sorry im insane lately and just rly enjoy my blorbo takin a bath and chillin#i dont know how to draw water still okay#i gave up part way#i tried my best alright#maybe one day#kisses him on his little nose#'brave thats a warlord' shut up you dont get it
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it ain't much but it's honest work
#not too shabby methinks for someone who has basically never crocheted#i did have to redo the pot though sjgfjsjkskskksj#the first one was BAD i didnt realize stitch count was actually important and it came out so lumpy lmaoooooo#i made this for a friend and like. i def have to give it to her but part of me also wants to keep it lol#but i dont have the energy/time to make another one like i basically holed myself up all weekend to finish this#the leaves alone made me wanna kill myself 😭#and i need to get this care package out asap its been too long now 😭#with this i feel really complete w my package though i just feel kinda bad shes gonna get my first attempt at crocheting OTL#i know i can do better with practice but augh time#ig an excuse to get into crocheting now though#so i can make things for my loved ones :)#i rly wanna make something for my sister too bc shes done so much for me this last year and ive been really#not good about showing my gratitude for her#0.txt
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