#why feelings so confusing
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Yo so I'm confused
How do I tell if I'm poly and a little bit in love with all of my close friends or if I'm aromantic and just love everyone platonically
#im having an identity crisis#i dont know what i feel anymore#i mean i had BIG crushes when i was a kid so i kinda doubt im aro but idk??#i havent been getting this type of crushes since like 15?#why feelings so confusing#i thought i have at least this part figured out#and now turns out i dont know neither my gender nor my sexuality nor my romantic attraction#what even is this#i know i dont need to labal myself but i feel like itd be very helpful for my relationships#cause i feel like im hurting people i love somehow#djnfjfjgjgjfkdmdn#im sorry guys it will happen again#rehn rambles
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I want to post this here too because I’ve seen it happen a few times
Please understand that there are cultural differences and language differences, if you see this happening let the person clarify what they meant, that person might just not be familiar with words the western side of the internet use
#bearz rambling tag#no it’s not really possible to let everyone who uses this term to change#because as far as I know this is the most common word with use on Chinese websites#I didn’t know that pairing are called ‘ship’ here#like why would I even know that#‘ship’ makes zero sense to me#it took me a while to learn the fandom language people speak here#it’s hard#give people time#shipping culture is very different too#Like on Chinese site you HAVE to clarify the Top and the Bottom of this ship in the ship name#it is very very important to them#people who like the same ship but with different Top Bottom preference will fight till no end#imagine how confused I was when I first got here#where there’s no top bottom differences#it’s not really a smut thing#it’s more a dynamic thing#AxB and BxA is very different#oh I can talk so much about the differences on fandom cultures#if ya are interested in more please feel free to ask#it’s very interesting to me#I wanna talk about it
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City Spirits awaken.
So! City Spirts are basically God's sustained by the people in their Cities. Some are Gods born from the belief and people of a City, others are God's who Bind themselves to Cities to sustain themselves in periods of low worship.
Almost all Major Population Centers have some kind of City Spirit bound to them.
The Personification of Los Angeles who slept with Constantine was born from her City, but she was young and weak compared to other City Spirits.
Lady Gotham is an Ancient Spirit who holds immense Power, but purposefully bound herself to the new and growing city of Gotham so she could sleep for a few millenia without worrying about sustaining Worship. She has been asleep for Centuries.
Actually, most City Spirits are Asleep.
Millenia Ago, the most powerful Gods and Spirits of the Infinite Realms fled the Rule of Pariah Dark. They didn't agree with his ambitions to conquer the Living Realm, and didn't want to let him use their Power against the Living Realm either.
So they Bound themselves to newly forming Cities and put themselves into Deep Sleep to avoid his Control. They have been asleep for Millenia now, waiting for the day Pariah would be overthrown so they could return to the Infinite Realms safely.
Then they day came. A New King was Crowned.
And the Cities began to wake up.
#Dpxdc#Dp x dc#Dcxdp#Dc x dp#Danny Phantom#Dc#Dcu#City Spirits#Lady Gotham#City Spirits are Gods#They fled the Infinite Realms when Pariah Dark first took power to not let him use their Power#And went to a Deep Sleep so he could not use his Authority to command them#They have been asleep for Thousands of Years#(Whenever the city they are bound to goes into decline they move to a new one) (a quick explanation for how they can exist in America)#They wake up when Danny is crowned as the New Ghost King#Lady Gotham and her Sister Metropolis are the first#Then Central wakes up#Then Coast and Star#And so many more#The JLA is confused#Why do some of them feel like they are being watched now?#Why do they feel a sense of gratitude from nowhere?
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a very small engiespy moment...
#tf2#team fortress 2#tf2 engineer#tf2 spy#engiespy#what do you guys call this ship idk i am out of the loop#yea it does say 9/11 that's my hc since it's his meet the team vid upload date LOL#this is so old i used to write so extra messy lol#i feel like i literally always have a reason for x thing but i cant for the life of me remember why i picked 1925 tho...#some tags are confused ...blnd means blonde lol
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LOA Shiptober Day 4: How They Met
October content month was ambitious..
This one took me. Shockingly long. Whoops! I’ll probably end up jumping around the prompt list and it might extend into November 😋
I’ll try to do day 31 on the actual date of Halloween though 🫡
#the good or bad thing depending on who you ask about my ship art is that there are many more ranting tags#once again bringing my “he can’t blush but what if he did’’ agenda#Ngl the first panel reminds me of a children’s book it’s kind of fire#I feel like frost doesn’t like being touched by most people#but then he meets gricko professional animal friend and he’s so confused bc wtf why doesn’t he hate this#so that’s the drawing#sighs fondly confused grimmorning#except frost is the only one that’s confused#Im not joking when I say this one took me a long time I started it the day before the prompt and finished it like a week later#unintentional but frost is doing the Jim halpert thing#he wasn’t supposed to be but it turned out that way#frost don’t Jim the fourth wall.. community reference yeah..#I keep forgetting gricko tail agenda#also I love all the requests I’ve been getting once shiptober is over those will be popping up#anyways that’s enough out of me#but seriously some of those requests are so good they’re actually inspiring me to finish these pieces#legends of avantris#once upon a witchlight#morning frost#gricko grimgrin#grimmorning#gricko x frost#OH last thing possible stardust rhapsody art on the way I have to share my dandy art with the world
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I am so fond of my headcanon that shadow has no idea how money works
Like he knows he exchanges money for goods, but he has no idea of the value anything holds
G.U.N issued him a bank account that they pay into, but he has absolutely no way of quantifying the amount in there. He was just told that he was not to give the numbers on the card to Rogue.
He once bought a $300 bag of coffee because he liked the packaging. He has a designer jacket that cost thousands and it was only when Amy pointed out that she knew the brand that he realised it must have been expensive. He’s bought VIP tickets for their concert trips more than once by mistake, then got frustrated when they tried to bring him backstage to meet the band (which he accidentally paid to do).
A few of his friends have described him as ‘surprisingly generous’ but truly he just has no idea what things cost
#Amy complains that she needs new bake ware and an entire le crueset set turns up at her door#he is confused and uncomfortable by how thankful she is#Tails explains needing a specific expensive part and Shadow returns with it#‘oh!! did you already have what I needed?’ ‘No? was the issue not transporting it???’#Rogue will absolutely invite him shopping and ‘forget’ her purse#he gets the feeling he’s being tricked somehow but doesn’t quite understand why he feels that way#GUN give him far more than enough to live on and he has no expenses so he’s loaded#he just has no idea#shadow the hedgehog#sonic the hedgehog
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How to say “I love you” in Blue Lock
I don’t really want to play soccer, but being with you isn’t a pain, so it’s fine.
Now that I can fight without you, being with you is even more fun
And then there’s this asshole...
I made it this far because of you. Since you allowed me to play soccer freely, I’ve grown this strong on Bastard München. But I can’t climb any higher that way. I figured that out in this match, I no longer need the freedom you give me. Forget about me, Ness. Find yourself a new king. It’s easier for me to live in restriction.
#come to blue lock#we have all kinds of couples here#the pair from the classic misunderstanding soap opera#the sweet best friends to lovers#and now the doomed “I want to be loved but I don’t think I deserve it coz I’m a piece of shit and I only know how to be a piece of shit…#...and your loves makes me feel things I don’t know how to feel and it’s fucking me up so I’m letting you go” asshole#and his confused ex-boyfriend who doesn’t understand why they broke up#i hate them#they make me so ill#but to be honest I’m seeing a pattern in these love confessions#and so I still have hope for kainess#kainess#nesskai#nagireo#reonagi#bachisagi#isabachi#nagi seishiro#mikage reo#bachira meguru#isagi yoichi#michael kaiser#alexis ness#episode nagi#blue lock love#miyamiwu.src#blue lock
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DATV explaining the 'Regret Prison'
A REGRET PRISON IS STUPID AND I'M TIRED OF PRETENDING THAT ITS NOT
TL;DR: a prison can serve as a metaphor but it shouldn't be entirely comprised of a metaphor.
From what I understood from what the game gave us: Solas has made a new prison to move the God's too - since bringing down the veil would free them from the Black City. This new prison is separate(?) from the fade or so far removed/contained that bringing down the veil would not compromise it...apparently. We interrupt his ritual, Solas gets sucked into the new prison he made, and the elven gods are free.
When Rook gets kicked into the fade they're physically there - which means it's a physical place in the fade, like how it was a mixture of physical/thought when we entered it in DAI. Which makes sense - the gods are real and living beings, they need to be in a place, there must be some aspect of physicality to it.
Alright, cool, it's a Black City 2.0 - I assume it's better defended to prevent people breaking in/out again?
NOPE.
We get there and it's a 'regret prison'?? It's tied to the regrets of those within it? Composed of regrets??? Solas had to wait for the right moment for Rook to be sufficiently 'full of regret' that they could switch places?
So is the prison tied to Solas's regrets? If so, how can Rook escape? The prison seems to work around the idea that it relies on the regrets of the person it's holding to work - which is how/why Rook was able to be trapped and later free themselves (along with whatever remains of the team apparently being able to do something on their end, not that we hear about it).
WHICH IS STUPID!
Are you telling me the prison intended to hold to megalomaniac elven gods was going to imprison them based on their own regrets? Is Solas assuming that Elgar'nan and Ghilan'nain are as self-pitying as he is? They'd break out quicker than Rook did! He made a time out corner for the elven gods to sit in and gave them an out if they reflected on their emotions/regrets or decided that they don't regret what they did. Elgar'nan, a spirit of tyranny, is not going to 'regret' his actions - he is going to justify them by telling himself and others that he knows what's best.
We can come across some of Solas's regrets in the prison if you run around a bit and explore:
Remnant of Failure - talking about the orb from Inquisition.
Remnant of Parting - talking about Mythal
Remnant of Reflection - more vague, talking about the Titans I believe.
So maybe he altered it - maybe he intended the prison to be 'locked' with his own regrets because after a millennia of having a pity party he still can't bring himself to self-reflect and look to the future. But what if Solas died? Or if his guilt lessened - would it diminish the strength of the regret prison?
We already have pre-established lore (though DATV has shown they don't really give a crap tbh) that once the being that has claimed/altered an area of the fade is slain, it's influence diminishes both in and outside of the fade. So if the prison was tied to his regrets then it would require Solas to basically live forever to keep it stable - especially if he brought down the veil and removed the one barrier that kept the world and the fade apart.
Rook and Solas needed some assistance to exit - but it doesn't seem like it was much! Solas used his dagger and Rook just...got out through a fade tear? This is Solas's 'more secure' second prison? It has a worse track record than the Black City! If Rook - who is not an elven god - managed to escape the regret prison what is to stop anyone else from breaking in and out of the prison?
And what did Solas intend to do with the blight - the bulk of which is apparently in the black city?? If bringing down the Veil would free the gods in the black city doesn't that mean that the blight would also be released?! Did he have a plan? Why does he go fully ahead with bringing down the veil at the end if the black city is still there and filled with blight?!
I get it: the 'regret prison' is a metaphor for how Solas holds onto the past and how Rook can move past their regrets and grow. He's trapped by the past - it's a prison. Cool. But this prison is supposed to by a physical place to contain the gods - not just to solely contain Solas. The mission is literally called 'A Cage for Gods'.
The Black City is an actual place that's so far out of reach of anywhere else in the fade that no mage can ever reach it while in dreams - let alone physically, which was only done once and took tremendous effort/blood sacrifices. It made sense - it was cool to see floating in the sky in DAO!
Though it's not said specifically, it's strongly implied that Arlathan is the Black City. You can see in the concept art that floating elven city is exactly the same as the black city in DAO! It's this foreboding thing just lurking in the sky - a constant reminder of the sin that led to the horrors of the blights and darkspawn. A real place with lore and history that also serves as a metaphor for the hubris and destruction of those who call themselves gods and act as tyrants -> for both the evanuris and the magisters.
I WANT TO UNDERSTAND THIS BIOWARE!
WHAT IS THIS KINGDOM HEARTS NONSENSE???!!
#we'll need Mickey and Donald to break us out of this one#this screams 'this sounds so cool lets put it in' and not 'how can we do something cool that works with the world we've established'#“it's metaphorical-” it can be metaphorical and make sense!!!#trying to invoke 'emotion' with that black and white tone and only succeeded in getting me to feel pure confusion and rage#THE FADE IS GREEN TINTED - THE LAST GAME WAS LITERALLY COLOUR THEMED AFTER IT#i'm passionate about the fade being green the same way i'm passionate about Aurora's dress being blue and Cinderella's being silver#solas's more secure second prison literally has a worse track record than the black city - why is he so dumb???#I regretted no choices in datv besides the decision to actually play this game lmao#if the game actually acknowledged that Rook's actions led to thousands of people dying maybe I'd feel something in the regret prison#no mention of treviso/ minrathous/ or southern thedas??#the team all knew the risks of what they were doing! they volunteered/made their own choices - ME2 did this so much better#played as an elf so I didn't even feel bad when Harding died because of the weird elf specific dialogue she had#I'm not sorry for the titans/what Solas did - I wasn't even there! Doesn't justify the shit that happened to the elves after either!#this game made me apathetic to LACE HARDING and i loved her in Inquisition#i'm sorry but I had more regret for choosing to speak mean to Merrill once than anything I did in this game#currently writing about the magisters sidereal in my lore post and I needed to blurt this out because its so stupid#typed out the word 'regret' so much is has no meaning in my head anymore lmao#datv critical#datv spoilers#bioware critical#dragon age the veilguard#veilguard critical
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The only reason Zoro hasn't worn the straw hat yet is because Luffy wouldn't be able to hold himself back from kissing him stupid and that would distract them from the plot a bit too much
#yes luffy putting the straw hat on zoro but what about luffy not doing it bc it makes him feel things™#luffy putting the straw hat on everybody and then it's zoro's turn and he imagines it and he can't deal with it#he's all red and nervous all of a sudden and he. doesn't get why. but he doesn't like it#so he decides it's better to just not do it#and zoro is so confused and a bit angry that he is the only one who doesn't get to wear. the stupid hat#but actually luffy is having a crisis#one piece#monkey d. luffy#roronoa zoro#zolu
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Dick during this scene: wait quitting was an option?
#dc comics#batman#batfamily#batfam#robin#tim drake#bruce wayne#dick grayson#nightwing#i can just imagine the sheer rage he must be feeling#'why didn’t i think of that???'#he could have used it so much#next time bruce is being a dumb buff emo dick could have just been like#'i quit'#and silently revel in the confused devastation on bruce’s face#also look at those shakespearian ass poses#this family is so dramatic i swear
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I don't hold grudges, that anger feeds into self-loathing instead.
#messyr#vent art#vent post#just confusing things I wanted to get out#as much as i want to 'hate' them- i cant#no matter how bad they get- i always forgive them and it hurts. But why does it feel wrong to feel hurt- that i'm not supposed to feel hurt#my mind has been altered so much idfk what to think and feel abt sometimes LMAO#one of those birds in a gilded cage AHAHA#learned helplessness#bpd#sometimes i wonder if i get out of this cycle of abuse
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Prompt 91
“Elnath Peril Nightingale, I love you but what the fuck.”
Danny was tired, he was really tired and could really use his partners’ help if they’d stop laughing at him. They were supposed to be lying low, they’d literally hopped to another world specifically to not bring attention to themselves.
Yet here his darling clone-child was, beaming up at him while also holding the hand of… he isn’t entirely sure what they are except for some sort of undead. Some sort of undead who couldn’t sheath their claws and who had bright yellow eyes currently filled with utter befuddlement.
“I made friends! They were on the fire escape and this one was hurt and needs stitches. They have really weird yellow-ecto though…”
Ah. Yeah, that did sound kind of concerning. Maybe. Damnit he’d need to call Frostbite.
#dcxdp#dpxdc#prompts#danny fenton#ellie fenton#eternal trio#talons#dc talons#court of owls#talon dick grayson#Ellie: Hey template of mine look you said I should make friends so I made friends#Eternal Trio who were going to have a calm day:#The half a dozen talons: Weird green talons?? Weird green talons who Heal Us and Don't yell at us???#Cobb: *confused elder talon noises*#Dick: *confused why-does-holding-small-talon-hatchling's-hand-feel-familiar noises*#Court of Owls: Where the fuck did our Talons & Gray Son go?!#talon!dick#talon
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I just tought about that time Neil and Aaron had to be separated from eachother by some random athletes (who spontanoeusly got names) because they were trying to kill the other and then a few days/month later the same people saw Neil with Andrew and were like WTF
#aftg#all for the game#andreil#andrew minyard#neil josten#aaron minyard#aftg brainrot#nora sakavic#i feel some people just can't differenciate them#or don't care enough to do so#they were really confused#like wtf man why you cool now?
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Okay so I started transcribing book 4 and I was going to save all my thoughts for the review post, but I HAVE to gush about this.
That’s delightfully not Alfonse.
Since I have written the past few books down, I can immediately compare and contrast how Alfonse and “Alfonse” talk. The differences are immediate. That little “Huh.” ended up striking me as odd, so I opened the search feature on the document and found that huh has only been uttered three times prior to this. Once by Sharena in book 1 and twice by Ylgr in book 2. Alfonse has never uttered a huh in his life, which means that’s a little Kiran speech pattern!!! Cool!!!
Kiran also tends to talk slower and meander a little in their sentences. So far, there has been an ellipses in nearly every “Alfonse” textbox. It’s because they’re thinking. They have a lot of new information to process on account of finding themselves in a brand new realm and Peony info dropping weird tidbits about how this place works with the unexpectedness of an elephant dropping from the sky. So, thanks to some multitasking, they seem to be picking their words as they say them, leading into fun little pauses. Also very cool! Then, in the line above in particular, they suddenly pick up the pace by letting off a series of rapid fire questions. Has to be cut off by Anna or they would have kept going. It does not feel like how Alfonse would question the situation at all— he’s usually very pointed and specific. This instead feels like the speed at which Kiran normally thinks. They’re pausing because they’re picking from the thirty questions their brain just asked.
Also!!! Look at that blunt ass hell “I’m sorry. I’m confused.” That’s two very modern sounding two-word sentences back to back. It’s absolutely not how Alfonse talks. No “my apologies” here their ass is confused!!!!
I don’t really got a point for this one folks, I just really like how fun Book 4 is on a reread. That’s my little guy officer! That’s the bastard that escalated FEH into a hyperfixation!!! Get them. Put them a container and give it a little shake.
#Something fun: I can see why Kiran and Alfonse are friends once Kiran starts talking.#Idk what it is exactly. It feels like they’d be able to keep pace? If that makes sense???#They sound smart. The questions they ask are valid.#I think these lines feel so different from Alfonse is because he’d ask Peony questions with the intention of wringing out information#meanwhile Kiran is looking to genuinely understand. They admit confusion because they’re asking for their own comprehension.#I think that pairs nicely. Close enough to mistake for eachother yet different enough to clearly spot once you’re looking for it#fire emblem heroes#fire emblem#feh#fe alfonse#feh alfonse#alfonse#feh kiran#fe kiran#feh summoner#fe summoner#kiran
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The opposite of a haunting is something very lonely, Katie Maria /// there's a little girl in my head, @heavensickness /// Little Girl Looking Downstairs at Christmas Party (1964) by Norman Rockwell /// Changing, Liv Ullmann /// found photograph with my words /// what they don't tell you, @tryworks /// Anne with an E, A Strong Effort of the Spirit of Good (3x07) /// Time Travel by Emhahee /// Second Wave (2023) by Amy Dury /// Katie Maria
#yes that is a photo of me as a child#I've just been thinking about my childhood and how I felt so different from everyone else and I didn't understand why#I always thought that when I grew up I would understand the world and suddenly be like everyone else. but I never did#and I still feel like a confused scared little girl. playing pretend at being a grown up#(I know that this could be read as being about childhood neglect and family trauma and you're welcome to interpret it that way#but I made it more about growing up undiagnosed autistic and being bullied and feeling isolated. I actually had a pretty good home life)#web weave#poetry#art#literature#norman rockwell#anne with an e#emhahee#autism#childhood#isolation#loneliness#girlhood#undiagnosed autistic
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The batkids, around 15 years later
Bonus
#JOKINGGGG IM JUST JOKING#dc universe#batman#dick grayson#barbara gordon#Jason Todd#Timothy drake#cassandra cain#Stephanie brown#Damian Wayne#duke thomas#their ages are so confusing in the comics#why is Tim stuck as 17 it lowkey pisses me off let him move past the robin mantle already#ideal Jason future is for him to get a degree and just chill Way of the Househusband style#Cassandra is my ideal Batman but Damian is great too#I just feel like he would want to do his own thing though#maybe besides the eldest two hope they all expand past their current vigilante names#maybe some of them retire or move out of gotham#the comics are so restricting due to questionable authors and the nature of comics in genera
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