#just me being mediocre
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I see this thing that bi femmes do a lot when they date men, they constantly harp about how much they want a gf but that they settled for a mediocre man like... trust me I get it girls are hot but why would you put down your partner like that 😭
#maybe its time to break up with ur man and just go find a gf???#im mega homo i draw girls being gay constantly but i could never imagine calling my bf mediocre or 2nd choice to a hypothetical gf#best part about being bisexual for me is that gender is basically irrelevant when it comes to attraction
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I want to read books I want to write more I want to play the piano I want to sing in key I want to delve into fashion history I want to travel I want to publish research papers and I want to become a surgeon and I’m supposed to do all that in this one wild and beautiful life
#Ummm#This is why taking time off before I go to med school is the right call for me there’s sm I want to do constantly but the time!!#This lowkey sucks tho bc ever since I was little I’ve had dreams of writing something profound and being published#Both in a scientific context and also just like in a writing anything profound concept#But ik writing is very high bar and Id have to dedicate time to it and be super serious if I wanna self teach and honestly#Every day Im more and more tempted to just get a lit masters but where is the time if I want to become a doctor!!#Maybe it’ll just be a far fetched dream that I work on on the side bc physicians who’re also authors exist#I j want to contribute something meaningful to this world but to do that ik I have to consume great art first and dissect it and learn from#It#And just like not listen to ppl’s opinions and do what I want but it’s hard when I’m on a timeline#It’s bc I understand none of these vocations are anything to sneeze at and I wanna take them seriously instead of being mediocre at them#Like I truly wanna LEARN but the time management skills are gonna have to go way up#Does anyone understand me or am I having an unnecessary meltdown
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is a total of three days of screaminktober missed worth it for this?
eh, idk, but I got this done, and it's not like anyone's holding me super accountable for that anyway
plus the funnier ending that I got to work/really wanted to post too
he put a lot of effort into those puns, dude, the least you can do is not call them bad
#i know this kinda paints them in a cynical “i don't wanna be the good guy anymore/i'm tired of being the hero all the time”#but they're just tired#like physically#and mentally#and emotionally#and they wanna see their girlfriend#and i like the idea of them being a bad guy for a little bit#my art#splatoon#splatoon 3#tsunami(captain 3)#ika(new agent 3)#captain 3#new agent 3#dj octavio#splatoon side order#side order bad ending au#side order#tsunami uptempo#those are actual mediocre puns btw if you wanna figure them out#or ask me and i'll tell you lmao
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iron / heart
Part of LoL Esports Elemental Series.
#lolelements#lol esports#t1 faker#t1 oner#t1 zeus#t1 gumayusi#t1 keria#skt bang#skt wolf#skt bengi#skt kkoma#warning: MAJOR yapping incoming below#thinking about still here.mp3 and 'gripping with my cold hands the shapes i used to take'#'it could all end here with the strange daylight caught in our eyes'#'my shadow stretching out through all the things i left behind'#opening ceremony+t1 has everything they need to put me on a stretcher to ER#images from lol esports flickr (2016 worlds either finals or semis i goofed and forgot)#(and msi 2024 brackets features and worlds 2024 semis features)#there is a universe where i collected more pics and put a bit more thought into which word should go to who#but that universe also involves me doing this at a time that is not 5am#this is my last one probably twas lots of fun but new things on the horizon for me#this post is scheduled to post on finals day but just know that i am awake and shitting my pants over worlds finals#then recovery period and then im shifting into arcane mode#being completely deranged is a full time commitment never let anyone tell you otherwise#lil pat on the back for myself for successfully posting one per day til finals EVEN if they were sorta mediocre or dupes hahaha#special thanks to t1 for making it to semis because if they didn't there's a chance i would have lost steam LMAO#work school and the physical need for sleep work hard#but the esports demons in my brain work harder
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Incredibly mad at myself because I just had a vision of one, singular path to Dinostar.
I keep trying to kill it because it's been dead for years, but apparently there might be a way.
#it's very angsty and I don't think it'll happen#but we will see#just stay gone and either get back to the mediocre cute ship or let me have my on-and-off toxic yuri#jwct#chaos theory#it mostly hinges on Brooklynn and Darius both being on top of the other's mind#but
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Game designers/visual artists going "yeah we'll minimize the narrative noise" while having literally zero expertise in storytelling/narration <33333
#thoughts#totk critical#it is SO painfully relatable#once I was in a meeting for a narrative game with designers#from a studio known for narrative games and praised for narrative games#going “yeah I legit don't give a fuck about story at all I just skip everything it's pointless to me I only care about mechanics”#to me and to my face btw!!!!!#here's the thing: verbose self-involved games that are too into their own mediocre story are a thing and they annoy me too#I do 100% agree that interactivity and player involvement will matter more always#(but also!! being engrossed in a good story IS inherently interactive and playful!!!!!! hgnnn!!!! anyway)#fun fact: that game ended up praised for its story and panned for its mechanics so oh well#should have maybe gave more of a fuck about narrative intent and the game would have been better and sold more maybe#crazy how these things happen#anyway sorry I'm a hater today
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the gay people in my game r trying to kill me
#you’ll never guess which ones /s#god max and chloe my beloved#i will never forgive half of this fandom for subjecting you to be either just romantic partners or just mediocre friends#theyre everything.. theyre nothing#theyre plantonic. theyre romantic. theyre a secret third thing :devious:#i have a post i could make about this— should i#dont worry it wont be. LIS by viziepop again#no it’ll just be me being insane in a different silly way#pricefield#max caulfield#chloe price#life is strange
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standard sketch turned colored with effort story up here uhh
I'm also a bit let down by the immmortalis trailer, but I'm still hopeful for it being at least a little fun. I think it's gonna be an AU or a post queen ending where the protagonist gets off the island somehow. either way I do like to think it's taking place in a completely different kingdom.
anyhoo silly headcanons and doodles below
soooo i think they'd all have slightly different fighting styles
- The Beheaded (in game) has the most varied style, jack of all trades type of guy, though they're the most cautious of the bunch with encounters, knowing when to run unlike the rest. - Bobby (trailers) uses the meme builds and pets, though they're ok with most weapons, they've got a deadly proficiency with pans. Bobby also rerolls for biters on all their weapons. - Official art, for them its kill or be killed, relentless and constant bloodshed. they never use shields and bows are only used if they can't reach their next victim. - Flame (immortalis) from what the trailer showed, he strangely keeps mainly to fist to fist, he used some light weapons but most of the trailer had his hands empty. He seems the kind to beat an enemy to a pulp with his fists and feet than any weapon.
also flame being the only one that can speak is funny to me
one laaaaaast little thing
little little silly guy silly scrunkle tiny
tiny man (derogatory to the highest degree)
#completely off topic#why can the queen talk while the beheaded cant in game?#is that something the devs forgot or just a strange quirk of being a “perfect” homonculus?#art#original art#dead cells#deadcells#the beheaded#bobby dead cells#dead cells fanart#dead cells immortalis#dead cells beheaded#dead cells bobby#what do you call the trio drawing thing?#eh idk#i see immortalis beheaded as a squeaky toy#maybe thats why i dont hate it as much as everyone else?#hes just too silly to be angry at to me#im excited for it still#though its probably gonna be mediocre im still hopeful#id love any comments#idc for reblogs i just like seeing what ppl say
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why is luis cabrera like the only latino in fnaf. odio ese puto cabrón él es insistente como un loco tiene demasiado stalker vibes. porqué no podría ser alguien tolerableeee él NO ES Gang🙅🙅
#Taking away his latino card bc he slightly ticks me the wrong way. tbh i dont even dislike him that much i just love being a hater lmao#at least i can hc other chars as latino🙏🏼 Argentine greg and dominicana cassie save me#cam.txt#rare cam speaking spanish occurrence... u will never see this again. my spanish is MEDIOCRE! i am a wee bit of a no sabo kid
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i need you all to know that the main reason (besides a general hunger for attention) niles even accepts aldori’s call is because he got caught stealing his student’s work and passing it off as his own and his reputation as a teacher was obviously ruined. lmao
#when i say that niles is the most envious creature i mean it#he’s watched a good handful of them become more successful with their music than he ever would be and felt that since he was basically the#reason for the success (not really. not like it’s everything it’s mostly luck but you have no real passion for this lol)#it would be fine if he had a piece of the cake too with future students. not like he immediately came to this conclusion#and felt not torn and no guilt over it.#took a while to rationalise it and all.#the envy and feelings of inadequacy and a desire for approval and fame just won over after a time#it’s not like he believes he’s better than them he just wants people’s eyes and attention on him so unbelievably bad that’s what he believes#he deserves#and at some point(s) he feels so small that he will do shit like this. he would fake having a terminal illness too lol#he’s just a loser. niles’ story is supposed to be a horror comedy style thing and the majority of the comedy comes from that fact lol#oc: niles#honestly? can relate on the parts of being a loser who is only ever mediocre at something creative they do.#for me i don’t think it’s for the same reasons as niles especially don’t care about fame or shit like that lol#and i obviously don’t steal shit even if my ocd tells me the exact opposite so much#that i actually hesitated to post this because i thought people would assume that i steal too because he’s my character#and your ocs always have a part of yourself in them and what if people found out that i was stealing i just didn’t know and. hi.#can you tell that i’m a fear based writer. i write about my fears. hi#anyways. and then kingmaker and fae mpreg happens. yay
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𝐚 𝐬𝐜𝐚𝐫 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐝𝐞𝐩𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐝 / drabble ₊
growing up, he'd never been made to feel the lesser of the sons of fraldarius. often, he'd wondered if it was all in his head.
he couldn't be said to have received any less attention. though his memories of his mother are sparing, their father had been equally rigorous with them both. their education had been equally complete. their training equally emphasized. it made sense——the name fraldarius wasn't a small one, or easy to live up to. the arm that filled the king's shield, young or old, needed to be strong, peerless, unflinching.
he couldn't be said to have received any less love. as the youngest of their entourage, many would've said he'd had anything but.
maybe it had only been in his head.
maybe it was him who saw glenn's skill in both lance and sword when he just wanted to exceed him in the blade.
maybe it was him who noticed how glenn cast with their father's talent in the goddess' magic when he showed no interest in those lessons.
"you're too narrowminded, felix," his father told him. his tutors told him. his mentor told him. "what happens if you're disarmed? your sword gets taken?" they proceeded then to do just that——schwing!——sunlight glinting sharply off steel as it sailed tip over hilt to clatter to the ground, leaving him defenseless at his enemy's lancepoint. at the other end of it was any number of those who'd built him and honed his skill, made him who he was today.
. . .
like he said, his father was like that too. skilled in faith magic, that is.
they say that magic came to him before the lance did, even before riding did. that when he was a boy, he used to struggle to match his peers in steel, and would be mocked and laughed at: what kind of king's shield can't even land a javelin! but that he made up for it in the strength of the goddess' smite that would silence them.
glenn, too, harnessed the same terrifying aurora that spilled from rodrigue's deft hand: a roar of brilliant light, the memory of dark waves bloodstreaked from horseback burned into a foe's eyes, more than enough to make repentence of apostasy.
for his father, it'd been faith in the goddess. his brother, faith in his loved ones.
in turn, felix had never sought out magic, never felt or welcomed its spark. his father said nothing——even after glenn had died, he said nothing, for all that he said to him at all at the time. and with glenn's death had died the last of any desire he might've had to pursue it: to better match him maybe, or live up to some imagined expectation ; to please his father maybe, or shirk off the voices saying he was too stubborn. instead, the blade was where he found himself, the same where he had always found himself. the blade was where he found his brother, and the pieces of everything he'd once held sacred. and so there he'd stayed.
until——
until. . .
a drop of ink disturbs clear water. someone tells him: magic will make you a stronger swordsman.
it's an echo of the voices from the past. "you're too narrowminded, felix" chases him forward in time like a hydra, grabbing him again in these cloistered, dust-smote halls where they'd never walked and had never seen him. his expression sours at first, and he swears, he swears. . .
but this time, he listens——because the voice that has chased him is none other than glenn's. airy and teasing, always flippant, who used to say to everyone else: "lay off him. he'll pick it up or he won't." now he says:
give it a try, felix.
give it a try, felix.
so felix finds, with enough time, that his faith is the faith that splits like lightning. born not from the goddess, nor in the belief that in memory he will never die, but something else. some third thing he doesn't know, but which howls and thrashes and bites even him, which would claim his life if he wasn't strong enough. and it feels like him. it feels like him like the blade feels like him, an extension of something he lives by and vouches for.
after all, thunder isn't too far off from faith: a flash of light, a smoldering crater, a scar for the departed.
FELIX has mastered:⠀ dread fighter.
#﹙ ˙ ˖ × ﹚ + ╱ THE HOUR AT WHICH THE WILDERNESS GLEAMS BLUE .#the way i was like “i hate this i hate this” the whole time while writing it#and only started being like “okay maybe this is presentable” toward the end LMAO#drabbles are a struggle for me so i've started telling myself “it doesn't have to be the next great american novel” each time#and it does actually really help with the writers block#but it means i'm not always in love with everything i put out KLJNALKSDJ#me @ me: thats ok tho rai just accept mediocrity sometimes
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Soooo. Was Poppy Playtime Chapter 3 a fluke or
#because tell me why they're releasing a bunch of new “nightmare critter” designs#so nothing different or new first of all just a rerun of what worked and was appealing in the last chapter apparently#plus they've all got this. mediocrity to them#the smiling critters weren't perfect but they had a simple charm and a sense of uniformity#they felt plausible as a brand#these new guys feel like designs a brand would pick from a roster of fan entries#and incorporate (poorly) into the original show's style#the posing is worse the line weight is worse#it's. eugh#my exact reaction as each new design comes out “😬😬😬”#maybe I'm just being a hater but i have literally no one to rant to about this soooo fellow haters interact#anyways. my expectations for chapter 4 have dropped significantly but who knows maybe it'll defy expectations.#knowing Mob Entertainment's track record tho literally none of this comes as a surprise 🤷🏾♀️#words#poppy playtime#is there a neg tag. uh. idk#this is all tags anyway
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anyways the smut I’m reading is really good I’m completely invested
#unimportant thoughts#hate when smut is good it makes me upset because ill never be desired in the way characters are#i want to be eye catchingly attractive so fucking bad#i hate being mediocre#and I know i shouldnt complain but just!#ugh#i wanna have the looks and the confidence to go with i want people to see me and want me !
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seeing that new post from the official sonic account like Oh new espio art how ni AHHHHHHHH TAYLOR SWIFT JUMPSCARE!!!!!!!!!!!!!
#sad ! the actual drawing was nice and some of the text on it was funny too but the yhad to make it about. that#i get that they are just hopping on whatever is trending for attention as brand accounts tend to do#but theres something . annoying . to me about how they keep mentioning her/referencing her on sonic social media stuff#when shes like . known for constantly polluting the earth more than any normal person could with that stupid private jet of hers#which goes against the message of the sonic games and is literally sonic villain behavior i dont think sonic would like her .#(amy and shadow wouldnt like her either idc what anyone says they would NOT be swifties)#also this is more petty than anything but her music is overhyped most of it is mediocre at best and im tired of hearing about it <3#i promise i dont actually think about tswift that much btw i just made a post about it the other day#because i was being forced to hear about her and it annoyed me and now im being forced to hear about her again and its annoying me
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guys :')
#it's so lame that i even care but :')#wil is one of those ppl i think it would be nice to sit down at a bistro with and eat mediocre baked goods and talk about mundane things#like dog breeds and city zoning and over 100 new species of frog being discovered last year#he just seems kind and pleasant#also btw it was the post about kirk and spock riding ponies in old fanzines.........#misc me
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Here very messy unfinished Nicky sketch that I'm deleting in 5 minutes or so (and def not maintagging) for whoever is up lol
This is when I would say "I can't remember the last time I posted a drawing here" but I do it was that Glenn who got voided from the tags because the world wasn't ready for his honkers 😔
#I knowwwww he's a messsss#It's being caught between knowing my art is mediocre and wanting to share it anyways aaaaaaaa#god I cannot draw mouths for shit they are the death of me#Also need to eventually gather refs for bodies- didn't use one here and it shows lol#But the love was in it okay#Despite all the self deprication I prolly will finish this if only for me- I wanna give him tattoos haha#Am I wrong for thinking that Nick would be the kinda guy that would wear a belt but still his pants would sag?#“But baba why are you posting this just to delete it” to get back into the habit of posting my sketches cause it's so so hard for me#Only just starting to get back into drawing after quite a break from it too!#Not me hovering over “post now” for 5 actual minutes
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