#just customer service things

[skyblueartt]

Au where nobody dies and teenage Elizabeth works at Freddy’s!!!!!!!!

[spicybrainjuice]

customer: I like your eyeshadow, it matches your hair

me: thank you!!

customer: its very sexy

me:

[completewannabe]

ok so I work in customer service and the funniest thing is when some dude walks in and conspiratorially leans over the counter and says, "can I get a five dollar biggie bag?"

like sir, this is a Wendy's. you ain't James Bond delivering a secret code. you are ordering your lunch.

(but I kinda get into it ngl like "oo biggie bag? what sauce for the nuggets?"

and he's like "bbq." and I'm like "roger that. for here or to go?"

[darth-revan-dark-lord]

Apparently a Mona Lisa Smile is the new resting bitch face

[ionomycin]

2023 favorites

[defiledtomb]

There's a story about a healer MC and Leith on my Patreon now, a concept slice of something I hope to develop while I get my bearings together after leaving my partner in the middle of the night, and find an apartment before it gets too cold to live in the vacation house I'm in right now. Once I have the funds to move, I will also get my stationary PC back, which means I can get back to finalizing ouroboros book 1!

If you want, you can join any paid tier to access the story, and watch the story unfold each week, see where I take it. If you join the $10 tier, there's a backlog of ouro smut to read too! >:3

Thank you to anyone who helps me through this tough time, through Kofi or Patreon or by just being here. You're in my heart locket forever.

[graciousdragon]

OH MY FUCKING GOD

I JUST WENT TO MY LOCAL HOT TOPIC THAT I'VE BEEN GOING TO FOR LIKE. 5 OR 6 YEARS NOW RIGHT??

I GOT SOME MCR STUFF BECAUSE. OF COURSE. IF YOU'VE SEEN MY RECENT POSTING HABITS YOU KNOW. THE BRAINROT IS REAL

I WAS TALKING WITH THE CASHIER ABOUT THEM BECAUSE HE WAS ALSO A FAN AND HE FUCKING SAYS "you wanna know a fun fact? this is the hot topic the lead singer used to work at! :D"

FUCKING WHAT

GERARD WAY USED TO WORK AT MY LOCAL FUCKING HOT TOPIC?!?

AND AFTER I LEFT I LOOKED IT UP TO MAKE SURE HE WASN'T FUCKING WITH ME AND YEAH. HE WAS RIGHT. WHAT THE FUCK

SORRY FOR THE ALL CAPS THIS IS LIKE. WORLD-SHATTERING INFORMATION TO ME AND HE JUST DROPPED THAT SHIT SO CASUALLY WHAT THE HELL BRO. I NEEDED TO SCREAM ABOUT THIS SOMEWHERE

[lokh]

would u trust me to be able to carry heavy grocery bags

[bogkeep]

so so sick of every courier service that's not just Regular Local Mail. why do they make everything so difficult and complicated all the time auuggghhggg

[raineandsky]

#95

The villain appears around the corner at a run, their hair still wet and their coat ridiculously crumpled. The hero raises an eyebrow at them as they practically skid to a halt in front of them.

“Sorry I’m late,” they say between ragged breaths.

“You’re fifteen minutes late,” the hero points out with a pointed check of their watch, “to your own crime.”

“To my crime?” the villain echoes indignantly. “Why would you invite me to my own crime?”

That barely makes sense to the hero. They root through their pocket and shove a tiny piece of paper in the villain’s face.

The villain’s eyes scan over the paper with an increasingly confused frown. “You told me to meet you here, and I have—even though you were, y’know, fifteen minutes late.”

“[Hero],” the villain says slowly. “This isn’t my writing.”

All accusations lining up in the hero’s mind grind to a halt. “Excuse me?”

“This– This isn’t my writing,” they repeat a little more intensely. They rummage through their coat for a moment, slapping a scrap of paper against the hero’s chest. “Did you write that?”

The hero pries the little piece of paper open.

meet me at the back of the bank at 6:30pm. not a fight. - Hero

“I didn’t write that,” the hero says automatically.

“What the hell is going on?” the villain demands. It seems to be aimed more at the air than the hero, but they feel inclined to answer regardless.

“I don’t know,” they say uselessly. “Someone wanted to bring us together. They knew we’d answer each other.”

They gesture with the note for emphasis. “Jesus Christ,” the villain says flatly. “It’s a two-for-one deal. We’re going to die.”

“We’re not going to die, [Villain],” the hero snaps, but the way the villain is glancing over their shoulder is making them want to do the same. 

The villain’s face twitches into some kind of horrible acceptance of fate for a moment. They open their mouth, their breath misting in the evening air as they gear up to probably say something stupid, but a voice cuts them off.

“Isn’t this a nice little gathering?” the henchman says brightly. “I’m glad you both came.”

[deoidesign]

Guys you're not gonna believe this. The books are wrong again

At least this time I didn't even get half of them and half of what I did get was damaged...? So I only have another 70 books to deal with... This time they're soft touch......

I've got so many of book 2 it's not even funny

[fadedrainbowbookshelves]

"Fraaank are you going to help me figure out where Howdy moved the fireworks to or not?"

"Try not. If I were Howdy, I wouldn't have even allowed you in the door after last week!"

[lazywitchling]

Got one for the Middle of the Night crowd and also the Australians: When you start trying to write something but realize that your clicky pen is not open, do you:

Adjust your grip on it and click it with your thumb, then readjust your grip back to writing mode?

Or violently jab yourself in the shoulder with the click button?

(Or perhaps a secret third thing?)

[whitmerule]

today's 'biting my tongue then patiently explaining' moments with clients

A:

client rings up: can I make an appointment to bring my cavoodle puppy in to have his feet tidied up a bit and have the hair around his eyes trimmed back? me (audibly working on another dog in the background of phone call): You don't need an appointment for that! I'm happy to do that as a walk-in, because that won't take more than ten minutes. I can use that time to tidy those things up for you and introduce him to the salon so his future grooms are less stressful, come in any time today before 4:30!

client: turns up with puppy me: puts the current dog I'm working on in crate, visibly talks to the other dog who is currently here me: spends ten minutes working with their puppy client: asks about prices for grooming in general me: explains pricing system client: yes I think I'd like a full groom for him please me: great, once I'm done with him here we can look at the calendar and book him in for his first puppy groom client: ... you mean you can't groom him right now? me: .... [internally, looks at crates with other dogs that I'm working on, looks at whiteboard with all the dogs booked in for the next week marked on it, looks into the camera like I'm on the office] me: .......... [remembers the multiple phone calls I take most days where caller assumes they could just get their dog groomed today or tomorrow and are vaguely affronted that I'm booked out six weeks in advance] me, brightly: Not right now, but let's look at the calendar and see when I might be able to squeeze in an appointment.

(further dog groomer grumbling below the cut)

B:

me, ringing client 10 minutes after their appointment should have started and getting message bank: ... hope all's well, please let me know ASAP if you're still planning on making this appointment, jsyk it's a 90 minute slot so I can't promise a completed groom if you're more than 15 minutes late, and if you're 30 minutes late we'll have to reschedule client: turns up 28 minutes late me: well, it's going to have to be just a bath and tidy, not a full groom doggo: is matted me: 😩 this is not going to be pretty, I will have to shave out the mats and won't have time to blend the shaved patches into the rest of the coat her: ??? why me: ... also there's a late fee (because I say so that's why)

me, after running 25 minutes into my next dog's slot to try to make this poor girl more comfortable: marks groom as complete, sends text to owner me, 90 minutes later: picks up phone to check?? that owner got text?? [your dog is still here and is barking shrilly and anxiously because she is not crate-trained, she has now been here for almost four hours pls get your dog I am not doggy daycare I don't have time to take her out to poop or play] owner: oh I'll be there in a while, gotta pick my daughter up from school, bye! me: [......... ok well if she has a toilet accident and steps in it I'm not going to bathe her again for your convenience, I have two other dogs I'm working on now]

C:

owner and dog I've never met before: arrive me, who's running well behind on this matted collie thanks to above dog: [oh thank goodness you're a smooth-haired jack russell mutt you will take like ten minutes then i can let you cage dry] doggo: is good doggo! is a bit worried! is actually very unsure of what's going on and also doesn't like other dogs [ABOVE DOG IS STILL BARKING IN CRATE] but is happy to be comforted and cared for! is even ok for nails! me, when owner picks terrier up: just so you know, she was very good and communicative but a bit anxious, especially when other dog was barking owner: oh yes, she hates other dogs and also we just picked her up from the boarding kennel two hours ago so she hasn't even been home yet, k thx bye! :D me: [... WHY WOULD YOU DO THAT TO YOUR DOG]

me: collie, you and I are the only sensible people in this room collie: 👀 me: and I'm not too sure about me collie: (now that you are not brushing my tail you are my bestest friend 😌)

[federaliszt]

im sure its been said but my favorite thing about watching the first season of the Bear is that sometimes working in a chock-full busy restaurant in the middle of rush is just Like That. like sometimes you are in the middle of 17 tasks at once, but you can literally only do one thing at a time unless you can somehow learn to multi-task and do three tasks at a time but the risk with that is always that you spill or bring the wrong order out but at some point you literally do have to learn how to do at least 7 things at a time, because all the other servers can, so why can't you too. and it's this constant throbbing pulse of order in order out, hurry hurry hurry, food is getting cold and customers are getting impatient and it has to be ready NOW but it also has to be PERFECT, and then all the sudden someone bumps you and you're spilling a customer's latte all over your new work shoes, and everyone's temper is foul, and that's exactly the moment when you accidentally stab your co-worker in the butt.

[grokebaby]

Like an abandoned vending machine, still full of products, waiting for you to put coins in without realizing it's all rotting in their wrappers

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