#just been a while since ive played with her
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chapter 3 : terms and conditions ⋆⭒˚.⋆
masterlist
you look up from your bakery duties, prepared to greet those who just walked into your shop, when you hear a familiar laugh. standing in the entrance of your bakery was osamu, atsumu, suna and a guy you hadn't seen before. you felt your heart skip a beat when your eyes locked on suna.
you quickly catch yourself and go back to helping the current customer youre with. all you could do was hope he didnt catch you staring, hed probably think you were a total weirdo or something, or even worse, you could just be boosting his ego.
in between helping customers and packing orders, you exchange quick glances at your phone to check on what akaashi is up to
after 2 more customers you finally reached osamus group.
"heyy y/n! how've ya been?" osamu smiles at you, you smile in return and greet him and all his friends.
"so you're the infamous y/n" the friend you hadnt seen before holds out a hand to greet you. "infamous?" you question, worry rushing over your body, what have these guys been saying about you?
osamu kicks aran in the back of the knee from behind the counter so you werent able to see. "i talk very highly about yer bakery, these guys know all about ya!" osamu nervously chimes in, followed by a forced laugh.
"yeah, nice to finally meet you, i'm aran" he smiles shaking your hand firmly. you take his order and add osamu’s regular to the order as well, then you take atsumus order, then finally sunas.
“what do you suggest, y/n?” suna speaks up after examining the menu for a minute. “our cheesecakes are pretty popular” you smile, pointing to a few flavors in your display case. “is that your favorite?” you look up from the display only to see suna staring right at you, he had no interest in the cheesecakes. you felt your face heating up at the interaction.
“uhmm…. my favorite are the chocolate chip cookies, i put a lot of work into those” you smiled “i’ll try those then” he smiled lazily. you returned the smile and added the brownies to his tab. you then go to package his brownies and hand him the bag. “thanks” he says taking the bag from you, he turns to make his way over to his friends at their table, but stops and turns back to you. the business in the shop had kind of died down, you had started to make you way to the back until you heard your name called out
“y/n”
“yeah?”
“do you want to, uh, sit with us?”
“uhm, sure!”
you feel your palms get sweaty as you make your way around the counter to the table, one of your employees taking over the register
just as you pull out your chair to sit down you hear the doors of your bakery open. you look over and see akaashi staring back at you with a confused look on his face as he walks up to the ordering area.
“i think it’s bout time i properly introduce myself to ya, im atsumu miya, but cha can just call me tsumu’, i play volleyball on the msby team” he grins at you while tearing UP the banana bread and milk tea he ordered. it’s a little funny watching him talk about himself with bread crumbs all over his face, you couldn’t help but smile, it seemed like everyone was really enjoying your baking.
“oh, and i’m aran, i also play volleyball but for the tachibana red falcons, ive known these 3 idiots since high school though” he laughed, leaving the floor to suna
“we’ve already met, but yeah, i also play volleyball” he replied flatly. jeez, why even ask me to join you. “aren’t cha’ gonna tell her what team you play for!!” atsumu nudged him on the arm “i play for ejp” he says to you turning his phone off and putting it down for the first time since you’ve sat down
“so, how’d you meet osamu?” aran asked. “well we opened a few weeks ago and osamu was kind enough to bring some onigiri over as a welcome gift, after that we’ve kind of just been friends” you smiled. “wow, samu being nice, almost hard to believe” aran says side eyeing osamu next to him.
“woah” suna suddenly speaks up, you look over and see him taking a bite of the cookies you made. “these are actually a lot better than i thought they’d be” suna says looking at you with stars in his eyes. this was the first ounce of emotion he’d shown since you first met. “it’s like, you can taste the love that was put into these” suna smiled genuinely. “that’s probably the $45 flour yer tastin’” samu laughed. “yeah i must say, your baking is other worldly y/n, you’ve got serious skills” aran says validating sunas claims. “thank you guys so much” you smiled feeling your face heat up again
the rest of the night went smoothly, the conversation even continuing after closing at 8pm. akaashi had left about an hour ago and you felt yourself finally feeling comfortable around your new found friends.
“hey, how bout we all go to karaoke later, my treat!” osamu suggested.
everyone agreed and started to pack their belongings up. “i’ll have to close up shop but i could meet you guys there!” you smiled. “that’s fine, we’ll just go get a room and order drinks and food while we wait, it shouldn’t take you long right?” aran asked. “nope! maybe 30 minutes? and then i’ll be on my way”.
“here, put your number in my phone and i’ll text you the information” suna said handing his phone over to you. you knew he was just giving his number over to give you directions, but you couldn’t help but feel your face heat up at this gesture.
“i already have y/ns number y’know?” osamu cocked a brow at suna while you typed away on his phone. all suna did in response was shrug at the brunette in front of him, earning an eye roll from osamu. “i’ll text you soon” suna smiled at you as everyone waved goodbye on their ways out.
just as you begin to lock up shop you get another notification from suna
you already decided you weren’t going to sing but hearing everyone else sing sounded really fun, especially suna, you wondered what type of song he would pick or how his voice would sound. once you got to the karaoke spot you noticed someone waiting outside. suna? why was he out here all by himself.
“hey suna! why are you out here?” you asked curious.
“just getting some fresh air, oh, you’re here” he said standing up straight. “to be honest, karaoke isn’t really my scene” he admitted sheepishly.
“oh, me neither” you laughed in return
“wanna ditch?”
taglist: @karasusrealwife @iluv-ace @cc1306 @wakashudou @kawahearts @weirdowithaphone @sugacor3
(comment to be added to the list :)
#haikyuu#hq#haikyuu headcanons#haikyuu imagines#haikyuu fluff#haikyu fluff#haikyu x reader#haikyuu smau#haikyuu masterlist#haikyuu mlist#suna rinatro#suna imagines#suna rintaro#hq suna#suna rintarō#sunarin#suna fanart#suna rintaro haikyuu#suna rintaro x reader#suna x reader#suna fluff#atsumu#atsumu miya#osamu#osamu miya#aran#aran ojiro#akaashi#oikawa#kenma
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Jealousy Hidden Behind Masksִ ࣪𖤐.ᐟ
hiya🙂↕️🙂↕️ this is my first tumblr post— this is also posted on ao3. howeveerrr I am aware Ghost and König are not in the same team ive been playing this game since I was younger, so think of it as an au or something idrk
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Last week you and your team were sent on a mission in Mexico trying to find some cartel in Guadalajara. However one of the new sergeants put herself in mind boggling danger. She stood tall at an open fire, trying to take the bullets for everyone else so they could have a chance to
live.
Everyone was screaming at her to get down, to save herself. But she didn’t want to listen, if she was gonna go down…She would be remembered for how she did it
For the few right reasons,
and for all the wrong.
You not wanting this bright eyed sergeant to lose her life from one dumb heroic decision, you took it upon yourself to tackle her to the ground. However in the midst of tackling her you got shot in the abdomen an exceptional amount of times. Due to you and the sergeant being severely injured the team couldn't move forward without abandoning you both, and to Ghost, that wasn't an option.
❤️🔥
“Are you stupid [name]?” his fists landed on his desk, causing the glass of water atop it to shake slightly. His voice may have been calm with a sharp edge to it, but he couldn't stop his actions. You were trying your absolute hardest to choke down your tears, you couldn't cry in front of your Lieutenant like a scared little girl who just lost her parents in the store.
“Huh? Are you?” he quipped. His icy blue gaze narrows on your small frame sitting on the chair in front of his desk.
“Ghost-” my voice shook as I tried to keep myself together, slowly meeting his piercing gaze.
“Don’t ‘Ghost’ me.” he hissed, cutting your trembling voice off. But somehow, Ghost cutting you off only fueled the fire that was slowly building inside of you. You looked down at your balled hands sitting in your lap, slightly picking at your nails to try and calm yourself down.
Even if you could see his face, you already could imagine what it looked like. His blonde eyebrows furrowing in frustration, his lips pressed thin in a firm line of anger. You could understand his anger to a degree, but was this really necessary? You’re sitting here living after all, injured but alive.
He took in a heavy sigh of anger, “You deliberately went against orders, and almost got yourself killed.” he growled, there he was again. Referencing the stupid wounds that litter your abdomen due to your stupid, heroic decision. His lips drawn back in a snarl as he looked at your body, studying your body language to try and guess your next move.
“Ghost, why do you even care so much?!” you finally snapped at him, which in turn caught him by surprise with your sudden outburst. Your eyes burning with frustration that had finally boiled over. Slightly shifting in your seat while never breaking eye contact, wincing at shooting pain coming from your ribs, the pain you’ve been so desperately trying to ignore. The exact pain he was referencing throughout this entire argument.
He paused for a second, debating his words. “Because I care about you.” he said flatly, the anger in his voice was slightly gone but it was still there lingering. “Don’t you get it? Do you need me to spell it out for you to even reach your thick skull?” he sneered. There's the anger that was lingering in his tone. His eyes never left yours, it was becoming a battle to see who would break eye contact first, and it wasn't going to be you.
His hands were pressed firm on the desk, standing over you like some kind of hierarchy. You sat there, your eyes staring into his while you sat there like some child getting scolded by a teacher.
“I don’t need to get it.” you muttered under your breath, annoyance clear in your tone. “I never asked for you to care,” you paused, inhaling a sharp breath while standing up to push in your chair. “Nor anyone else, so don't make it my problem.” you hissed through your teeth as you reached his office door, whipping around to open it. Maybe you were the one to break eye contact, but at this point you couldn’t take it anymore.
God if you wanted a lecture you could have gone to Price.
Ghost just stood there, a blank expression on his face that was carefully covered by his balaclava, though his eyes read a thousand words. You opened the door and slammed it shut, walking away from his office briskly, you reflected on your choice of words. They were harsh, no sugar coating that, but they were true. Right?
But this time he didn't try to call you back, demanding you come back to speak to him. He just stood there in his office, contemplating everything.
You walked back to the barracks quietly, not bothering to say hello to anyone you passed. You walked for what felt like forever, being trapped in your own thoughts made it worse.
Once you finally reached your room you opened your door quickly and slammed it shut. All your prior frustrations came back as soon as you stepped in the room. Your eyes pricked with tears as you stood there silently, a lump in your throat formed and it was impossible to choke down. You kicked off your boots and made your way to your bed, as you flopped down on the soft mattress you couldn't hold back your tears.
The tears fell smoothly down your flushed cheeks, your body curling up in a ball as you drowned yourself in blankets. Your quiet sobs filled the room, and it didn't even matter that you still had your uniform on, you didn't care anymore. Your abdomen was throbbing, the pain making your tears fall harder than they were before. His words flooded your thoughts, ‘Because I care about you.’ kept replaying over and over again.
Why did he have to care? That made this so much more worse than it had to be.
The sobs eventually got quieter and quieter, god. Why did I have to be such a crybaby? So- sensitive. His words felt like thousands of sharp knives cutting through you. It was awful, it hurt so much. Your eyes began to flutter slightly as you continued to cry, all you could do was cry and ponder on your decisions.
❤️🔥 pov change.
My eyes slowly blinked open as I woke up to a pounding headache. Damn it. I glanced at the clock as I sat up. It read 17:38, I sighed and closed my eyes leaning my back on my headboard. I rubbed my puffy eyes and crawled out of bed, throwing my blankets off of me. I stumbled to my feet, grabbing my night stand to balance myself.
Finally steadying myself I walked into my bathroom just to look at what I looked like. Oh my god…my tear streaked face was a sight to see you could say. I turned the light on before turning the sink to cold and started to splash my face with freezing water, hoping it would clear my post-cry face.
Turning off my sink and grabbing a towel I turned to pat my face dry, good enough.
I looked at my puffy eyes in the mirror with a huff before walking out of my bathroom and turning off the light. I walked slowly towards my door, slipping on my boots and walking out of my room.
Roaming the halls it was quiet, nothing was really happening. It wasn’t a busy day today, the halls holding an uncomfortable silence as I walked through them.
The sounds of my boots lightly treading across cold tile floor filled my ears.
Continuing to walk towards the mess hall I saw Ghosts office to my right, the office that hours earlier I stormed out of. I shook my head with a sigh and continued to walk towards the mess hall. Though the halls were oddly quiet, it was unsettling to say the least.
Reaching the mess hall I realized it wasn't as crowded as it usually was. I didn’t have an appetite so I decided to just sit down at one of the empty tables and lay my head down, just listening to the talking and bickering of the place was comforting.
That's when I heard a familiar voice behind me, his presence was strong but his accent was even stronger.
“Schatz?” the man asked, his Austrian accent strong.
“König?” I asked and glanced up to see the tall Austrian man standing behind me, looming over me like a giant building.
He sat next to me, he clearly saw the somber expression written all over my face. He sat close, but not that close. The chatter in the mess hall was a comforting ambiance to this situation.
He gently lifted a finger to my trembling chin with his rough index finger, forcing me to stare into his pale blue eyes.
“Ist etwas passiert?” he asked softly, his tone quiet but still audible from the noise around us. (Did something happen?)
“No…” I whispered lower than he could hear, my voice slightly shaking as I tried to keep myself together.
I quickly hung my head low, breaking eye contact with him. My bottom lip was trembling as I tried to choke back my own tears, I didn't want to worry him, especially with all the stuff he's dealing with on his own.
“Oh, komm her.” he coaxed, pulling me into a bear hug. Trapping me in his warm embrace, playing with my hair in an attempt to calm me down. (Oh, come here.)
I lost it, I started bawling into his chest. Clinging onto his shirt in a desperate attempt to make sure he wouldn't leave me.
“Ghost and I had a fight-” I managed to choke out.
Ghost, the name alone made Konig tense up. I felt him squeeze me tighter in his arms when I said his name.
The name rang in his ears, his head racing with thoughts of him and you together as he gently stroked your hair.
Why can't you just realize that I can be so much better than him? Konig thought quietly.
Everytime Konig saw you with Ghost, it felt like you took his heart so gingerly, so sparingly…only to stomp on it afterwards. Or whispering sweet nothings into his ear but plunging the knife in his heart, over, and over again.
“He wont talk to me-” your trembling voice broke him free from the prison someone called thoughts. “and I'm worried I really messed up big time…” I sobbed even harder into his chest, it felt like I was dying.
Dramatic much. Though my chest heaving, I was hyperventilating.
“Shhh…” he soothed, rubbing my lower back gently. Konig gritted his teeth and bit his tongue, he didn't want to upset you more than you already were. He didn’t want to add his name to the list of reasons.
He just sat there rubbing your back, just being a shoulder to cry on. My fingers clung to his shirt, like he was a balloon and I was trying so hard to keep him on the ground with me.
“I know it hurts, but everything will be fine.” he reassured, his voice soft but still stern enough to make you listen to him. He spoke of things he knew nothing about, having no prior knowledge was hard but he was trying his best.
Him calming me down was oddly comforting, his warm embrace made my heart flutter slightly. “Just calm down, it’ll be fine, I promise.” he calmed me further, his accent coming back stronger.
He held me tight, holding me like I was the most precious gem in the world and he would do anything to keep it in his possession.
How could he promise something he knew nothing about?
How could someone make such an empty promise?
I finally pulled away from him, my tear streaked face and glassy eyes looking up at him with a pained expression.
My breath was still labored, my bottom lip wobbling as I tried to keep myself steady.
“I know it hurts, but give him time,” he paused to take a sharp inhale. “You guys always work it out.” Konig mumbled through gritted teeth, his personal vendetta with Ghost was getting the better of him.
He wanted to say so much more, how Ghost didn't deserve you, how you shouldn't cry over someone like him. But he didn't, he kept his mouth shut because your comfort was his top priority.
It hurt him so much to see you in pain, to see you cry over Ghost was, who quite frankly, could go jump out of a helicopter and he’d be fine with it.
I was pulled from my thoughts as I glanced around the room. Out of my periphery I saw Ghost, leaning on the mess hall door watching me. Wait no…
Watching Konig?
His eyes looked like they were burning with irritation, though they had a hint of…
Jealousy?
His gaze narrowed on Konig who was looking at me with pitiful eyes, who looked at me like he wanted to say something more but didn't.
My head slowly rose to look up at Konig. My eyes were glassy as I looked up at him slowly, my lashes fluttering. He kept his hands on my waist, just looking down at me. That's when I realized Konig wasn't looking at me anymore, his eyes were focused on Ghost.
“I’m sorry…” I whispered, though I wasn't sure if he could hear me over the chattering in the mess hall.
That's right, I forgot that's where we were. It felt like everyone else was invisible when I saw Ghost, like I could only catch his gaze and that was it.
“Warum guckt er sie so an?!” König muttered beneath his mask. I looked up at König again, my head slightly cocking to the side at his comment. (Why does he look at her like that?!)
“Huh?” I asked quietly, my hands balled in front of me.
“Nothing.” he mumbled, his eyes quickly going back to mine. I glanced slowly back at the door, trying to see Ghost once more.
But he was gone, the tall Brit that stood there, watching, was now gone.
All I could see was the people chattering, not even noticing me and König, thank god.
“Im so sor-“ I started quickly before König cut me off.
“Don’t be sorry, its not your fault hes-“ König stopped himself from saying anything more. I gave König a slightly puzzled look when he abruptly stopped talking.
“Just don’t be sorry.” he restated, not bothering to add the extra words he was about to say.
Oh.
I just sat there on the bench, pondering in my own thoughts, pondering on what he was going to say. However thats when König stood up from the bench, no longer feeling his large hands on my waist.
“I have to go, schatz. But please, please, don’t be sorry, everything will be okay.” he assured as he rubbed my shoulder slightly, his accent dripping off of his words.
His words were sweet, so sweet. Almost like poison, leaving me slowly wanting more of his comfort, more of his touch.
I gave him a curt nod as I looked up at him, wiping my face with my sleeve while I watched König walk away.
I felt so alone all over again, my red puffy eyes returning like a bad hangover.
Another cold water splash for me.
I pulled myself from my thoughts, I needed to leave, I just needed to get out.
I started to force myself up from the bench, lowering my head to not let anyone see my tear stained face, and red puffy eyes. I began to walk briskly out of the mess hall, not bothering to to looking behind me as I reached the door.
For some odd reason when I reached the door my eyes wandered. I looked left and right, high and low, just to see if he was there.
If Ghost was there.
I shook my head and started walking quickly, the chattering and bickering slowly fading as I quietly walked out of the the mess hall, returning back to the uncomfortably quiet halls.
Finally returning back to the empty barracks I grabbed the cold door handle and swung open the door. Only to have warm air hit me as soon as it opened.
Great.
I walked over to the bathroom, reaching my hand up to the light switch. The yellow toned flickering light flooding the bathroom.
I sighed when I saw my face. Looking up to see my eyes were bloodshot, my under eyes no longer purple, they were red and puffy.
Just what I need.
I scoffed at my own thoughts before turning the sink on, letting the water run to a freezing temperature before finally lowering my head to splash my face with the water.
It felt like a sense of relief as the first drop hit my face, almost feeling like someone was running an ice cube across my face.
I continued to let the water hit me. My face gradually becoming warm because of the cold.
Though it gave me time to think, should I apologize to him?
Him was Ghost, I just couldn’t get him out of my head. The way he stared at me and König in the mess hall lingered in my mind like König’s cologne hitting my nose.
Wait- why am I even thinking about both of them?
I turned off the water and groaned. Wiping the droplets away from my eyes as I looked in the mirror once again. This time there was no redness,
well maybe except my nose that was cold now.
I grabbed a towel and roughly dried my face, before tossing the towel on my sink as I flicked off the light.
Leaning down I unzipped my boots,slipping them off I stood on the hot hardwood floor before I slumped on my bed. Letting all my worries slip slightly as I hit the hard mattress, the springs beneath me rattling slightly.
Why do I feel like this?
What am I feeling towards both of them-
What is even happening?
I laid on my bed, my feet slightly above the ground as I contemplated everything. I wanted to work things out between me and Ghost, but the look in his eyes when he saw me with König.
Not to mention König gripping me tighter when he saw Ghost.
The AC turning on erased my thoughts,
Finally, it’s hotter than the pits of hell in here.
My own thoughts were driving me crazy, I couldn’t stand to be alone with them anymore.
I guess thats it? I apologize and all of this stops?
I groaned getting up off my bed, my feet hitting the cold ground. No thick pair of socks can save you once the AC turns on.
I hobbled over to my boots, zipping them up quickly trying to get my poor feet off the cold hardwood.
Stumbling over my own feet I finally reached my door, carefully opening it, unlike how I swung it open 10 minutes ago.
The warm air of the halls hit me as I walked into them, slowly closing my door behind me.
Creeeeeek.
Was all I heard as my door closed. Cringing at the noise I started my journey to Ghosts office.
Roaming the halls it still held the same uncomfortable silence, odd.
My boots clicked and clacked as I ventured closer and closer to his office, my veins starting to pump with adrenaline as I drew closer.
My stomach churned with unease,
what would I say?
I didn’t even rehearse this!
Though my body had a mind of its own. As I drowned in my thoughts I finally realized I was standing in front of Ghosts office.
Good lord help me.
I was knocking on his door before I could even second guess myself.
Knock,
Knock,
Kno-
My first was still in the air when Ghost cracked the door open slightly, peering out to see who was knocking.
His eyes held an irritated gaze when he opened the door after realizing it was me. When his door opened enough to where I could see him fully, the smell of cigarettes and cologne wafted in my nose.
“Do you need something?” he grumbled, his brown eyes piercing through me.
“I uhm-“ I stammered, forget what I said earlier, I should have never came here.
“Cat got your tongue?” his eyes narrowed while his brows furrowed in annoyance, he was obviously not happy.
I let out a quick sigh as I fidgeted with my nails behind my back, “M’sor-“ I started quietly as he cut me off.
What is with them and cutting people off?
“Why.” he stated, nothing more, nothing less. His eyes holding no emotion to go off of anymore.
“Why?” I questioned as I stood outside of his doorway, my facial expression painted with confusion.
“Why?” he scoffed a pause, “Why were his hands all over you?” his voice was gruff when he spoke to me, his bulky figure leaning on the door frame.
I stared back at Ghost who was staring at me dead in the face. My eyes widened with surprise at his words, even his tone.
“What, do I have to elaborate for you?” he growled, his voice becoming rougher as his eyes bored into my soul.
“I- What?” I stumbled over my words, desperately trying to find the ones that were stuck in my throat. I stared blankly at him, my nails stinging from my consistent picking. Unease coursing through my frozen body.
He let out an exaggerated sigh before grabbing my wrist and pulling me into his office, slamming the door on my way in.
I let out a quiet yelp as he grabbed my wrist and dragged me into his office, the slamming door making my body jolt.
He spun me around, my back facing his desk as be grabbed my hips roughly.
“Ghost-“ My face flushed a pretty shade of pink, an unwanted shade of pink, right?
“Ghost get off of me!” I demanded as I pushed his hands off of me, stumbling as I tripped backwards into his desk.
What was he doing?
He looked at me with hungry eyes, jealousy and hunger. Though his eyes flashed with a hint of surprise as I pushed him back.
He didn’t say anything, both of us just stood there in an uncomfortable silence. His muscles tensing slightly when I pulled away.
“What the hell- Why would you put your hands on me?” I broke the silence, my eyes flashing with confusion- irritation even. I was so lost and confused.
“And why would you let him touch you like that?!” he countered, his husky voice getting lower as he took small steps towards me.
My blood ran cold as he started to walk towards me, I felt helpless as his eyes flashed with an unsettling look.
“I-“ my voice was caught in my throat, a lump was there was was impossible to choke down.
“Why does it matter to you?” I finally choked out. But that was probably the worst choice of words I could have picked.
‘Because I care about you.’
His words rang in my head, practically running circles.
Though a shadowy figure broke me from my thoughts when I realized he was standing directly in front of me, his bulky figure looming over mine.
His palms rested on the cool wooden desk my back laid against.
“What are you-“ my words got lost as he cupped my chin harshly forcing me look up at him.
My body shuddered, I stayed frozen. My mouth hung open, desperately trying to say words that fell on deaf ears.
I couldn’t speak, I physically couldn’t, my words hung in the air like a sheet swaying in the wind on a clothes line.
“Why would you let him touch you, [name].” his voice was low and husky. It didn’t even sound like a question anymore, it felt like a command.
Like he was commanding me to stay helpless beneath him, commanding me to answer his ‘questions’.
More like demands.
“Thats none of your business Ghost- Get off of me!” I shouted, my voice trembling slightly as I tried to use my palms to push him back,
but to no avail.
He was anticipating this, Ghost stood tall like a brick wall in front of me. Keeping my cheeks in his rough gloved hand.
I was stuck.
lmk if yall want a pt 2 cuz this is over a year old😭😭 maybe ill have motivation
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the vices of mice
james potter x reader
fluff, friends to lovers(?)
warnings: talks about mice(?)
content: james didn't envision his second date with you to involve so many......rats?
a/n: i kinda hate this ngl, ive looked at this too long. terribly nervous to post but fuck it we ball
Mice.
No offense to Wormtail, they were not James' favourite. But unfortunately, actions always have consequences, and this was it. Mice, popping up in their room, out of nowhere! Someone has retaliated to one of their pranks, and as hilarious as it was to watch Sirius jump around before he had the idea to turn into Padfoot and run away, it had become a nuisance, just in the span of a day. Sirius had made it very clear he wasn't scared of them (he definitely was) which "comforted" Peter (no it didn't, it was very clear that he was scared).
Remus had very explicitly said he would not do it, because he respects his friend's kind. But when after a week, the mice had taken over the dorm, running over sleeping bodies, ruining clothes, eating hidden stashes of sweets and chocolates, it was very clear what needed to be done. The predicament became much more severe when Sirius started wailing about his "lost hair" which had been "eaten by the rats". That's because it's shedding season Pads, Remus jokes.
Some would say this was a diabolical move, as the announcement to finally get rid of the mice was made on a Monday, the exact Monday when it was James' turn to keep the dorm clean, an exercise started by Remus. Previous week, it had been Remus's shift, but the full moon had rolled around, and James didn't have the heart to accuse his friend. If he can go through the extensive process of becoming an animagus, he can get rid of mice, though the former was a much more interesting project.
But this was not his biggest worry of the week, as surprising as it must be.
James had gone on a date.
And now he wasn't sure how to ask for another one.
Oh, the horror.
It had been a week since the date, and you had had a great time. The date had been a success, even though you were pretty nervous. James and you had known each other for a while, and it took much coaxing from Sirius and Peter and a particularly meticulous plan made by Remus to get you two to go on a date.
Now, both of you shut out again, a game being played on who will ask first. Bit of you wanted to win, but the paranoia of losing was much too great.
Two days went by but there had been no progression. Remus, again, had to take matters into his own hands.
"James, just go ask her out. She's not gonna say no!" He exclaimed to the bespectacled boy, who was now rolling his fork to capture his noodles in a spiral, but as he lifted his fork they fell down and James took a bite of a single noodle. But he kept his vision glued to yours. You were unaware of your admirer, or as Remus put it, stalker.
"Actually, I don't care. Just get rid of the rats." He said, shooting a quick apologetic glance to Pete which he responded to with a wave of his hand. He slung his backpack and began leaving the Hall, with Sirius and Peter hot on his tail. James took his time, finally took a few bites of his food and started cleaning up.
He took his last bite when he heard a voice say, "I thought you four had all the same classes."
His head perked up and he saw you, sitting opposite to him, nibbling at Sirius' leftovers, or well, the crusts of bread he had cut off. Fucking prince, you thought.
James was caught a little off guard and he couldn't explain why he decided to slurp the single noodle in his mouth before responding. He had anticipated the wait to be around five seconds, but it seemed as if the noodles had no intention of ever ending. He tried to speed up the process but that only added to his embarrassment.
Your eyes lit with amusement as you took small bites of the crusts,"Take your time." you tease.
He finally let go of the noodles, cleared his throat and spoke as calmly as he could, "I don't take Astronomy. And Remus has Divination."
You hum and a silence follows. James had been nervous before, and now he was panicking. It wasn't a welcome feeling. He had known you since you were kids, it was always easy to talk to you. The nervous anticipating silences bothered him. Fuck this, he thought.
"We have a mice problem."
"Let's not call Pete a problem."
"Not him, you idiot."
You grin but ask,"Who else is a mouse?"
He sighs before responding, having flashbacks to Remus' lectures."We got payback for a prank we pulled. I'm willing to bet this was your friend Marlene's work."
You were willing to bet on it too. The Slytherins wouldn't do something so secret. They liked to show that they had won.
"Suddenly she's only my friend?" You ask with mock skepticism,
"Real friends don't do this."
"Speak for yourself." He grins wide, caught in his own accusations.
"How do you plan on solving it? Burn down her dorm?"
"Unfortunately, I can't. Something very special to me belongs there." He says, a pleased smile taking over his face, which made you smile in return.
"Huh? What do we have of yours?"
"You. Can't let your pretty head burn, can i?"
This took you by surprise, and there were no quips you could respond to him with. A quick blush covered your cheeks and he tilted his head, his smile contagious. You rolled your eyes playfully and tried to brush off your giddiness, "Alright, what are you gonna do?"
"Well, if I don't clean up the dorm by today Remus is going to be my head." James says, thinking back to a few minutes ago. He also remembered how he had told him to 'just ask her out', and a terrible idea popped in his head.
"Would you help me?" He asks, his voice a little quiet. He tried for an air of nonchalance, he didn't think he had achieved it.
"You want me to help you shoo out mice?" You ask, your eyebrows raised.
He only shrug his shoulders, a pleading expression on his face,
"Alright. Sure." You agree, as if you would ever give up a chance to spend more time with him. "I've always wanted to chase mice anyway." You make an excuse, which makes no sense.
"You've 'always' wanted to?" He asks skeptically,
"You have your fantasies, and I have mine, Potter."
"Strange fantasies you got there." He says, slinging his bag over his shoulders and extending a hand, inviting you.
You follow his lead, a bright grin on your face and James' heart does a few cartwheels.
…
"Let me get this straight," Sirius says, holding up his hand to any obstructions, "You asked her to clean YOUR dorm room, which is infested with mice because of YOUR prank, and she's still coming?"
"She's not cleaning it for me." James tries to justify his poor choices,"None of you pricks will help me. So I had to ask for help."
"You must be packing for her to agree with this sorry excuse of a second date."
"Wouldn't you like to know loverboy?" James extends his hands and makes kissy faces towards Sirius when Sirius swats his hands away and escapes him,
"I'll pray for her well-being. You're clearly not right in the head." Sirius says, opening the door rather dramatically before leaving the room with a grin.
"Wow, so it's not cool to kiss homies now?" he shouts after Sirius.
Remus and Peter bark out a laugh at this. They both get up and head towards the library.
He waits impatiently, fiddling with his hands and running his hands through his hair then fixing it, then doing it again and again. He was in the process of deciding whether his glasses looked better on his eyes or resting on his head, when he heard a knock on the door. The same time you always use to indicate it's you who's knocking.
A smile graced his lips and he made a last futile attempt to tame his unruly hair before opening the door.
"I brought cheese!" You hold up a bag, and sure enough, James sees a block of cheese inside.
He barks out a laugh,"For us or the mice?" still chuckling.
"I thought we could share." You say shyly and James wraps an arm around you in pity (or that's what he tells himself).
"Well, at least this will go well with the snacks." He muses.
"Do we have snacks?" You ask excitedly and he points to a pile beside his bed and you run over with grabby hands but he's quick to stop you.
"One snack for every mouse. Think of it as a treat."
After a bit of arguing over the snacks, and opening three chocolate frogs, you finally get down to business. Your hair is pulled back in a ponytail and you've set rat traps around the room when you huff,
"Tell me again why we can't use magic to summon them?"
"You don't think I've tried?"
"This is the last time I'm helping you."
He only grins and gives you pieces of cheese laced with rat poison,
"These are NOT for you." He reminds you.
You giggle and start placing the blocks where they need to be and you've already spotted the first rodent bastard, "James, look!"
James sprints towards the rat, barely catching it, his body jumping off of beds when his feet get tangled in his sheets and he falls with a thump on the bed, his hand still outstretched to reach the rodent. You both sigh in defeat when the rat escapes his reach.
"Goddamn it."
You pat his back comfortingly trying to contain your laughter and say, "It's okay, soldier."
This continued on for a while, and now it had turned into more of a laughing contest than catching (or rather chasing) rats.
You're on the floor clutching your stomach when James disposes of another rat, alive in the bag they had been collecting the rodents. James caught the first one and couldn't bear to kill it, saying it reminded him too much of Wormtail.
Your bag had two more rats than his, not that this is competition, which he has pointed out later in the game, so you were winning.
After having two rats crawl over you before catching them had you at your end, and after what seemed like a few hours of this, it felt like you both had tackled the mice problem.
"You think we're done?"
"Think so."
Both of you headed to the Care of Magical Creatures professor, feeling it more fit to hand them to someone capable. It had taken a while to explain exactly why we had so many rats in bags with us, but he had let us go.
The day had ended and both you and James headed towards the kitchen to grab a bite, after extensively washing your hands.
Sitting down at a corner the house elves had prepared for you both, a bit too nicely than either of you deserved with your untimely demands, but they didn't seem to mind.
The silence after a day of chaos was comfortable, but there was an inkling in your brain that just wouldn't go away.
"I won the game, what's my prize?"
He looks around confused pretending he has no idea what you're talking about, "What game? There was no game."
"I caught more mice than you."
"Oh, did you? I didn't notice."
You nod your head with a smile, a grin fighting to break out. As you take bites of your food, occasionally casting each other a look after a day of enjoying each other's presence, it feels an awful lot like…
"James…" you trail off, his eyes on yours, asking you to continue. Your bottom lip rolls between your teeth to suppress a smirk when you ask, "Was this a date?"
His chewing stops momentarily and he fixes his glasses, pushing them onto the bridge of his nose,
"Could be if you want it to be."
You scoff, amused, "Your idea of a second date is catching mice together?"
"I just wanted a helping hand from a friend-" He stops at your raised eyebrow, his own smile mirroring yours,"I didn't ask you about this as a date. It just…" He trails off, looking for the right words,
"... happened."
"Yeah. Something like that."
His eyes flicker to your lips and there's a moment of hesitation but he leans down anyway, slowly. His lips are just a whisper away from yours,"We could make it an official date."
Your hands rested on his chest, another barely holding onto the piece of orange from your plate, "Good idea."
His smile is wider than ever when his lips lock with yours, slow and teasing as his hands curl deeper into our hair. You sigh into the kiss and you can hear James chuckle, and you swat his chest, which is only responded with him deepening the kiss. You abandon your orange to free your hand when you hear a loud hiccup, "Oh, Missy apologizes deeply. She didn't mean to see that, or interrupt you. Missy feels sorry, please forgive me, I will leave." A house elf, her eyes wider than they already are is covering her face with her hands.
"Missy, no, it's alright, wait don't leave-" She's gone into thin air before either of you could say anything.
You look at James with a defeated look and he says, "I'll find a better place for the third one."
"This one might need a do over, though." You gesture between the two of you,
"Oh, really?" He asks, a teasing edge to his voice,
"Mhm. Multiple runs, so we know which one's the best one."
"I like the way you think."
#james potter x reader#james potter x you#james potter x y/n#james potter imagine#self insert#james potter fanfiction#james potter drabble#james potter#sirius black#remus lupin#marauders#hp marauders#marauders era#james potter fluff
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🍔🥐🥑🍕🍁 for cateleya!
owah I wasn't expecting someone to questions about Cataleya!! 🥹
🍔[burger] : "What would your OC put on their burger?"
// She never really had burgers as a kid, since Coral is a vegan, and Coral didn't cook much (and neither did Cataleya, she ate a lot of easy-to-make meals), so Cataleya would def have a basic ahh burger- Store-bought buns, beef patty, cheese, ketchup, maybe mustard and pickles if she's feeling bold enough- She'd also prob absolutely LOAD it with ketchup and not be phased at all 😭😭
🥐 [croissant] : "Where is your OC from? How do they feel about their homeland? Where are they now?"
// Cataleya is from Henford-on-Bagley (definitely inherited a bit of a southern/farmer accent ykwim), she appreciates the quiet life of living in Henford like no other, while she grew up in a VERY busy home (6 sims, 10 if you count her kids who come along later), she was very prone to sticking to her room, she preferred to have her own place in silence, which is what she misses the most from Henford now that she's moved, there's a bit of a sparking hatred for Henford however simply because of her Mother, she attaches her Mother and Henford together, which she tries not to, but she finds it rather difficult. Now she lives in Copperdale, in a home just small enough to support her, and her four little creatures (kids)
🥑 [avocado] : "What will they never back down about, even if it makes them seem bad?"
// That there is no point in having big families (5+, 2 adults/parents, and 3 or more kids), She's rather biased since she grew up in a large home and also has kids, but she doesn't necessarily have the same maternal tendencies/feelings/instincts(?) that a Mother would have, so while she loves her kids, she would happily give at least 2 of them up, she believes that bigger families are pointless because "why would you wanna spend more money then you have to, just have one kid and continue the bloodline" (in her words, something along those lines), she sorta views family more as a continuation of the bloodline then people you love and care about, it's very hard to tell with her since she teeters between the two views, but she does firmly believe that bigger families are a waste of money.
🍕 [pizza slice] : "How good is your OC at sharing? How do they share something if there's not enough supply?"
// Well considering Cataleya spent most of her time in her own room, with her doors locked for anybody but herself, with no care to share her belongings, she is rather reserved, she doesn't like to share, if she bought it with her money, it's hers, if it's low on supply and she got it fair and square, then losers are weepers because she got it fair and square, why should she share it with other people?? Survival of the fittest.
🍁 [maple leaf] : "What is your OC's favourite season? Why and what do they do during it?"
// Cataleya LOVES Autumn, she always looked forward to HarvestFest, as it was, besides New Years, the only holiday her family would celebrate, she can hate her mother all she wants, but nothing will beat her HarvestFest Tofurkey... Other then that, she doesn't do much during Autumn, she really just loves it for the cozy, nostalgic and aesthetic feel of it.
#yapping#i rlly had to think with these#i dont really know cataleya as well as i do roo#still invested in her character tho#just been a while since ive played with her
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Need a new show to watch so im gonna start the X-Files 👽
#feelin down#writing is hard these days fellas#and my mom is pushing me to go on a cruise next year despite the several reasons i gave her as to why i cant#so im a little irritated#just gonna drink coffee and play acnh while watching this show#been a long time since ive seen any eps#and back in the day i only caught a rare one#on account of nobody else wanting to watch it with me#now my cats are all the company i need godspeed
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and now for something stupid
#but really i also just wanted to play around w this sort of coloring style bc its been FOREVER since ive used it#and i think i can make it look better now#AND i think i can make more sillay stuff like this and not have it take as long w cleaning up lines#anyway now you all understand the terrible dynamic between these three#phobo's infodump text is just copypasted from the wikipedia page for knives.#julliet ALSO uses knives is the thing so hes actually mansplaining < JOKE#he just wants to share. even if it gives her a headache. but he wouldnt mansplain he doesnt have it in him. hes ok with felonies tho#but julis life hasnt known peace since she was told to take care of the newbies#and shes ALSO a newbie (just slightly less so) so really this is probably just tartarus hazing her#theyd take one look at the two disorganized unserious overeager newbies and think ''you know what would be fucking hilarious''#and pass them onto the neurotic slightly-less-newbie who takes everything as seriously as possible. disaster combination.#i cannot stress enough that this is a group of bandits and murderers theyre NOT above hazing.#deimos actually is doing the best job at it since he is stealing as we speak#i mean hes not supposed to do it to his teammates but still. on the right track#as for the dynamic between deimos and phobos themselves its like. theyre just bros. theyre both pretty similar in personality#except deimos is kinda more mean and cynical while phobos can be kinda. dense and naive despite literally where hes at in life#but most of the time theyre basically beavis and butthead#i would also like to stress that juli is not being homophobic she just already cannot stand these guys and cant believe the audacity#but. complete misunderstanding. karma for stealing wallets ig#this will never be cleared up by anyone ever#but again thats not their dynamic they are just beavis and butthead. and i guess that makes juli daria LOL#finn's ocs#finn's art
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fire emblem awakenings future past dlc is the greatest thing intelligent systems has ever put out (biased statement) partly bc the story is the best thing thats ever happened to me but mostly because part 3 has gerome, severa, and laurent roasting the fuck out of grima moments before very likely death like omfg
like omfg they dgaf… ESPECIALLY LAURENT, LIKE…
hes so fucking mad 😭😭😭
#ann plays awakening#HATER CLUB HATER CLUB#looking god right in the face and telling her to fuck off like oh my god#the future past you will ALWAYS be famous#gerome telling grima ‘WE KILLED MORGAN MOTHERFUCKER’ is crazy#they didnt even do that hes just saying shit#i wasnt actually playing these maps i was just checking something in this scene bc it had been a while since ive read it#but i think im gonna have to soon bc omfg… peak fire emblem
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LOVE when the pharmacy decides to fucking dick around with my meds so badly that now I’m off my mood stabilizer, my pain meds, and my fucking birth control (in a few days) because they’re insisting I should have extra fucking bottles of each one and I DONT because they don’t let me pick up more than a one month supply of narcotics at a fucking time so do explain where these extra bottles are, hmm ????? and they didn’t have enough caplyta ordered last time to even give me my usual 3 months supply of that so … ???? get your fucking heads out of your asses and give me the fucking meds you owe me ??? like ??? but I’m in a nasty headspace right now so if I call the pharmacy this morning, I’m going to be that cunt ass customer they bitch about all day because this isn’t the first time they’ve done this. in fact, the first time, they straight up committed insurance fraud by marking one of my scripts as filled and picked up WHEN, IN REALITY, THEY FUCKING LOST THE SCRIPT AND HAD NO RECORD OF IT BEING FILLED OR PICKED UP IN THEIR SYSTEM, BUT YET, MARKED IT AS SUCH AND CHARGED MY INSURANCE AN ALMOST 8 GRAND FOR THE FUCKING 3 MONTHS OF MY MOOD STABILIZER THAT I. NEVER. RECEIVED. I’m genuinely about to report this entire pharmacy to the pharmacy board because I’m so fucking done with this place. it needs to be shut the fuck down because you’re telling me, out of an entire pharmacy, y’all share the same IQ point AND dead brain cell, collectively ??? then don’t fucking work in healthcare where people rely on you to know your shit and keep track of their fucking meds because you’re just constantly making shit worse on people since you can’t seem to not fuck around with these meds and not ‘lose’ scripts. fuck out of here.
and I’m pretty much out of weed, which is usually my back up pain management method, without the money to afford a delivery order by their cut off time to order in 3 hours because I just paid my fucking bills and have SOME to go towards it, but not enough for delivery to be free, and I’d still have to walk my ass to one of the ATM’s nearby because they don’t accept my bank as a prepaid method OR any of the cards I have on my person. 🫠
I can literally feel my back spasming and seizing on and off while I’m laying on my fucking side, I’ve had a migraine with a stupid ass aura for almost a week now because chronic migraines fucking suck and i was REALLY hoping this one would be over by now, my muscle inflammations that my pain meds are supposed to limit are already beginning to start their itching deep in my muscles so soon they’ll blossom into a whole fibromyalgia fucking episode and become entirely inflamed, my joints in my hands fucking hurt because of the dreary weather so I really need to get into a rheumatologist at some point soon as well and get that shit figured out, I’m nauseas as fuck from all the pain, and I’m moody, hormonal, and just feel like fucking death physically.
I’m just. I give up.
this shit is exhausting and painful and so mentally fucking taxing to constantly deal with and I just want a fucking break from all this fucking shit. I wish I could just … not exist … for even just a little while with how fucking painful existing actually feels right now 🫠😭
#i hate that CT weed is so fucking expensive#half a fucking ounce shouldn’t cost me $250 …….. not when I can go to MA and get an ounce for $108 after tax ……..#but I don’t have a way to MA because my fucking best friend. who made plans with me OVER THE WEEKEND. HER. SHE INITIATED THEM.#canceled on me last second even though I texted her early the night before when I know she would see it 🫠#nope instead she waited from the text I sent at 6:30pm until noon the next day to cancel because her period is kicking her ass#NOT FOR FUCKING NOTHING BUT SO THE HELL IS MINE ???? AND IM ANEMIC ??? AND DEALING WITH ALL THIS EXTRA PAIN ON TOP OF IT ????#and I know I’m being irrational and insensitive because pain tolerance is a sliding scale for everyone#but like fucking come on you do this 3 out of 4 times YOU make the plans to hang out and I’m fucking over it.#plus I’m the one that always pays for everything and does she ever even OFFER to hit me back for the COUNTLESS ounces of weed I’ve got her#all because she couldn’t afford it so I said I’d cover it and she never paid me back. I’ve bought her at least a grand’s worth of weed#just over the last couple months and she’s never ONCE offered to pay me back for a single one#like ……… I don’t expect it. I give if I have it. but you can’t even just offer ??? like the invitation to pay me back would be enough to no#leave m ragingly pissed off and feeling used as an atm again for yet another ‘friend’ because they don’t even OFFER to be considerate#of course I’d say not to worry about it but it doesn’t even cross your fucking head to ask if I want anything towards it#like the next time you get paid ??? when you go and spend your own money on weed that day but can’t reimburse me for anything IVE paid for#oh and I always have to give her gas money if I even simply just want to hang out because she’s always fucking broke somehow#and she works in healthcare like bitch I know what you make and you can’t play that you don’t have enough to get by or throw me 50 bucks#towards YOUR weed that I’m buying every once in a fucking while when I’m already paying for everything fucking else#I’m so angry and I know I’m being irrational and bitchy but this is what happens when you’re tripped off your meds cold turkey#and one of them is a mood stabilizer that makes it so you DONT feel this way about people and aren’t so bitter when you’re let down 🫠🫠🫠#because now my rejection sensitive dysphoria is going to be triggered even easier than usual and I’m just.#I actually fucking give up. I don’t even know what to do here. the pain going through my body is so fucking intense#I keep losing my train of thought because everything hurts and then every once in a while a DIFFERENT pain acts up and throws itself in too#I just. I just can’t fucking win.#I hate fucking struggling with my mental state like this when I’m off my meds.#and because I have to be a month without my stabilizer/pain management/birth control it’s going to take me ANOTHER month to get readjusted#to those in my body so I won’t feel normal again until nearly fucking mid to end January the earliest#and that’s fucking bullshit. I’m going to fucking **** myself by the time I get back on these fucking meds since it’ll take that long#fucking hell I just. I give up. I give in. I’m self isolating and cutting myself off from everyone because it’ll be in THEIR best interest#for me to do so when I can’t control my mind like this. I’m so tired of feeling so fucking shitty and I’ve only been off them for two days
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yagami should get his back snapped in half like a toothpick if he wanna fuckin sleep on couches exclusively might as well be doin the same amount of damage
#snap chats#judgement posting real ??? <- hasnt played it yet#LISTEN MAYBE TOMORROW IDK#im thinkin to spend my morning on comms then in-between class time on judgement and then the rest of the night on comms#i may or may not be packed like a sardine... omg that reminds me of my train trip tho#the train system i was taking was kinda sketch on the lowest of keys but it was so funny transferring trains#cause the second train i had to take there was An Atom of room left and thankfully i have the body mass of a paper bag#so i just slipped in but then i was just fucking smooshed against the wall. it was hillarious#oh yeah. 'snap why are yo making this very specific post' because i didnt realize the benefits of sleeping on a bed#all summer when i was at my moms i slept on a couch in our basement since.#i refuse to sleep on the same floor as her at this point LMAO she dont make me feel safe in there#so yeah i just did That for three months and ive obvi been sleepin on a bed since going back to school#and dawg while i was over there for the weekend i only slept on a couch Again#the added benefit to sleeping on the couch is my dog is more likely to sleep near me.. hehe..#OH BUT YEAH NOW MY BACK HURT. ive never experience back pain like this before..#maybe the couch i was sleeping on sucked idk. the one i was sleeping on's cushions get pushed out real easy#my usual couch doesnt but... dog...... dog likes the other couch more lowkey....#anyways Get Yagami A Bed 2024
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The way I had like 3 mini altercations w roomie today, mostly boiling down to me saying "you were our friend and decided your comfort mattered more than your word to us. Stop talking to me and text me from your mommy's like you decided"
and at the very end, grabbing THE VERY LAST item, she takes her sweet time clearing out her shit from my organizer (i wasnt allowed to touch her stuff, i tried asking). Apparently, pointing at shit that belongs to me is hitting, and she hit me, making sure to yell into her recording phone and pointed at me that I put hands on her when I didn't.
I just don't get why, suddenly, today, all the conversation had to happen. When they left me on read since telling us to leave at an impossible time and told us we were so scary to talk to. Why did you have so much so say today when you avoided all fucking contact until I was exhausted with your bullshit.
#every single irl person ive told about this says god yall are so patient#every single irl person ive told about this says there wouod have been so much more petty shit happening#but it was literally just one person escalating little by little and us just trapped in a room#i do not understand how she can still play victim even until the last piece of fucking furniture#of course im talking shit to your face the day we leave#i KNOW i cant hit a white girl. all she recorded was her own assault on me while blaming me for it and calling me a crazy bitch#im just glad i got some of it out cuz i had really been holding on to everything i wanted to say#since they were very decidedly only talking to nova about things in person and over text
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yknow im probably going to sound a bit overdramatic for a moment with this sorry but,
ive said like two lore streams ago or w/e that im not going to let myself get as heated as i did at the start with how gun's been handling ( read : forgetting she exists ) maria all this time bc at this point i consider my portrayal of her an oc, as i essentially feel across the board with my other texas muses frankly but like.
i do think, while i was obviously thrilled to no end that they announced maria & she was playable etc, i do think the execution of her in-game really sincerely disappointed and pissed me off so badly. like yes end of the day shes a bunch of pixels etc etc whatever sure but its like. genuine frustration at how absolutely sidelined she has been since day one. and i know theres plenty of valid arguments for other characters receiving similar treatment ( ie. sonny ) in a variety of ways, and i do get the angle of maria initially serving as a haunting of the narrative, haunting her friends and sister and being more of that sort of invisible presence rather than physically there in the moment like they all are - but its severely disappointing to see just how little they give a shit about her, both in lore & in gameplay etc.
model-wise? shes completely fine i adore how she looks and everything shes beautiful shes adorable shes exactly as babygirl as i hoped and imagined her to be & look. but shes otherwise both so underwhelming and so borderline useless ( being generous ) and her ability is just the most uncreative pointless thing i feel they could have thought to give her. like. theres so many pieces i can rip apart for just that alone but i dont wanna yap for an eternity lmao
i just wish they gave an ounce of a shit about her. and like sure yes they could easily alter things or add on things on for her in the future etc. sure, yeah, fine and all but its just... i dont think im going to forget how sloppily put together they made her. or how they've consistently forgotten & disrespected her all these months. and with them branching away from her & the friendgroups' story into other victims' as time passes, their already sheer-ass attention spans are only going to grow thinner across the rosters and i guess in my eyes theyre just never going to make up for any of how they treated her character. and like yes thats fine bc i & others will do her infinitely better justice than they ever will but its still just like... its still disappointing.
like so much went wrong with that release day that i think i was just trying to cling onto the excitement of her just being playable but everything else, certain other complaints etc i wont get into, made me think that disappointment in how she was executed was an exaggeration on my part bc im too attached to her lmao and so i kinda just internalized the disappointment i think but it really is just like man. i feel like ive lowkey been in mourning of her since she was released. no faith at all that they are ever going to give her an ounce of dignity outside of how her model looks.
and again. i know i and the fandom do her infinitely more justice than they ever will at this point and that fact alone does make up for this all, i just wish she was remotely fun to play as and didnt feel like such a slapped together, zero-thought, near copy-paste non-asset in-game. i play her bc i love her but she also just makes me fucking sad LMAO
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#sorry for random whatever this is its been eating away at the back of my mind since release day & only worsened while playing lately lol.#im literally so fucking thankful that ive been able to work on her for so many months & that ive had such lovely experiences building#her character from the ground up with this lil corner i love you guys so sincerely & bigly for helping her grow into the character#she is currently & will grow into in the future - i just wish gun would love her w even a fingernails worth of how much we adore her.#( 'mourning' is probably overdramatic as hell but its the word that comes to mind lmao ) like i know my expectations need to stay#reigned in w/ gun & i try to but it is just. discouraging as hell w/ her in-game & then the constant worsening state of the#game on top of it not helping in the slightest lmao. anyways sorry again ignore me im just thinking too strongly about my girl-#end of: im proud of where ive been able to take her & how ive built her over this nearing year of writing her & im beyond happy w/ the#connections shes made & the stories being built & all of it. shes my oc as she stands on this acct & i truly hope i keep#building her for a long while more. sorry if u read thru all this nonsense also thank u & kisses to the sky for loving my girl w/ me <3#we all do more than gun literally ever will with any of them.#gonna go lie down & prob cry a moment & then return to Normal and try to write FNJKSD
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got myself a little pocket radio bc you never know when severe weather might knock out the power or cell towers but apparently there aren't any weather radio stations i can pick up :/
#there just aren't any in my area#and im right in between the two closest stations so they interfere since they're on. the same frequency#there ARE other radio stations in my city im listening to one right now that plays alt rock#like From This City not even a neighbour city#but there's none that report weather#i wanna have a weather radio bc i have a deep fear of tornadoes#ive been doing tornado drills since i was a small small child they're a pretty common thing here#and i have had. so so many nightmares where i got stuck somewhere during a tornado#stuck in a car as it gets picked up or stuck at school watching the building just disintegrate in front of me#one time we did actually get stuck at the school during a tornado warning they couldn't let us go home bc we had to shelter#so we were kept at the school for maybe an hour until the warning lifted just curled up with our heads down for so long#i still instinctively know the tornado sheltering position- legs folded under you; head down as far as possible; hands covering your neck#even though i haven't done a drill since i moved nearer to the lake#tornadoes get less common closer to the lake but living in the middle of nowhere they just Spawn Everywhere#another time we got word of one touching down while i was on the school bus going home#i was literally the last student on the bus and we were like at the corner about to turn to my street#and the bus driver decided to just stop there and let me sprint home bc it was faster cutting through the woods than going up the driveway#she just opened the door and said 'just go straight to your basement don't stop don't wait for anything'#she waited to make sure i could find the key bc i was home alone and then just drove the school bus to her own house so she could shelter#I've never seen any tornado damage firsthand but like. you never know when one could just wipe out a town#especially small towns like my old hometown if that place ever got hit by a tornado nothing would be left#it's literally one street that's the town center and most of the residences it's TINY and getting smaller every year#i think it'll be a ghost town soon most of the businesses have shuttered and a lot of houses are condemned
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I wanna take a crack at making some fake screenshot graphics for my Sif Odile duo loopers au but I do not feel confident enough in my ability to mimic isat's art style and I also have a crippling fear of drawing backgrounds
#rat rambles#stars posting#I wanna make a thing for odile's parallel scene to the bathroom scene were sif forgets odile's name#but it takes place in the traps room by the wood carving tools which isn't the worst room to have to draw ig but I still dont want to#I could just take the lazy route and just sketch the scene so I can get it out of my head and I probably will#but at the same time I also should draw more stuff with backgrounds even if it makes me want to throw up and cry#but yeah the scene is basically just odile having a derealization moment while thinking abt the wooden odile carving sif made for her#just her looking at it and feeling nothing and trying to look ahead at siffrin expecting to be reminded of what it's supposed to make her#feel and just being met with the same emptyness in her chest as she can barely even recognize the person in front of her until they look#back at her and their expression shifts into a extremely concerned one#does that make sense? idk if Im explaining it well but I hope it makes sense#but yeah smth smth them becoming less real to eachother overtime much to the horror of both#also unrelated but I need to start rotating loop in this au in my head more theres so much to work with here#I have some vague ideas and thoughts but I have been too odile brained to properly elaborate on those in my head#Im honestly just glad Ive finally made an au that I can actually get invested in fleshing out#I havent rly found a good headspace to rly play around with the main cast but this is actually giving me smth to chew on#usually most thoughts I have abt isat just lead to me thinking abt my ocs lol#regardless Im having fun with this au and I hope that I can bring myself to commit to it#also Ive been trying to think of a decent name for this au and Im half tempted to call it from the top or smth but I feel like Im tempted#to call like every story I make that so Im on the fense abt it#especially since thats what Ive been planning on calling the prologue for spiraling upwards#not that I cant just do both but I wanna see if I can think of any alternatives
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these things are always happening to the ones i like :////////
anyways the lighting in this dungeon is so nice
didn't get any good pics bc i was too busy dungeoning but so pretty...best dungeon music so far goes to snowcloak though btw
#ffxivposting#i knew it was coming bc i tried to use the google search bar as a spellcheck for his name (LOL) like a DUMBASS because in the suggestions..#i was like no!! no!! but he's so funny!!!!!! and the second he showed up in game again i started taking screenshots of me n the bestieee#it wouldnt be accurate to say that i am Emotional about this but i am like aw man...but he was so funny...insert montage of All The Memorie#was crazy seeing her looking so distressed in a cutscene. girl me too! he was so funny </3#the loud ass screenshot sound effects throughout the cutscene were funny though.this is who i am#altogether i have like 150+ screenshots of this game thus far.serious shit#IN OTHER NEWS:#- i cant stop laughing at finding out that a.lphinaud is in fact 16 years old. like i was guessing he was 17 or so but man it checks out#so hard. smart fella or not of course the sixteen year old boy naively founded a private army. it checks out so hard. hes cute :)#- since the tail end of arr patch quests ive been checking npc dialogue of relevant characters and thats a bit of a goldmine sometimes#- the first time aymeric(?) (not double checking via google ive learned my lesson) showed up i joked that he was going to be an akc type#and well no. he's really not. but i did cackle when it was revealed that he was a bastard child. clocked him on accident#- addicted to dalamud red dye. was funny when estinien started rocking his blood red armor like omg now we're Extra twinsies!#funny to me when they acknowledge the whole drg class stuff. like ah yes the Other azure drg. sorry estinien this feels like stolen valor#this is just what happens when u play f.fiv multiple times when u are r like 6. and also just think lances are sexy.#- can't wait to find out where tf the rest of the scions went. hi guys. you wont Believe what happened while you were AFK!#that's right! dragons! and then theyre like I Haven't Seen The Light Of The Sun For An Ambiguous Amount Of Time...cowabummer!#i keep joking abt needing to do a wellness check on urianger but honestly hes fine hes living it up in the sand. hes doing fine#- anyway can someone do a wellness check on ysayle(?).#- i've unlocked flight in a couple zones! thankkk god. some of these places are ROUGH to navigate without it sometimes.#- my keybinds are rough. also i have a gauge now. havent gotten to use it bc of level sync but anyway this feels like school#dont worry chat i only do duties with other real players when i Literally Have To Because They Make Me#- anyway. very ? about what theyre going to do with the rest of this story. intrigued. and quite sleepy i must say.
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flippin boobahs!
#weezer#rivers cuomo#brian bell#patrick wilson#scott shriner#OKAH HI CHAT#i’ve been thinking#this tag will be just a rant not really weezer related#yk laufey ?#i was listening to her song ‘letter to my 13 year old self’ and just started overthinking about myself when i was younger#i just think about my younger self and get so sad thinking about her; i wish i could’ve done more for her#i was a huge introvert and talking to anybody made me super super anxious; so much so that my teacher noticed and had me join a ‘social#emotional learning’ group where we spoke about low self esteem and how to raise it and everything like that#i only left it in 8th grade because i didn’t wanna keep missing class for it; but it made me so sad to think i thought so low of myself#i would wear hoodies all the time and jeans because i used to hate my body a lot#which is awful to do in socal heat!#i think it started because in my family i was always stereotyped as the fat one; yk how mexican families are? they called me gordita for#the longest time; which made me incredibly insecure and only in 10th grade did i start showing my arms 😭 IK ITS DUMB BUT ITS SO WEIRD#i still can’t do it entirely; i’ll wear shrugs and things like that because i still am insecure about my arms sometimes but ive been better#i only really had one friend but she had a different lunch; so i was alone for most of the time on the swings by myself or sitting at the#lunch tables alone waiting for lunch to end and this noon duty came to me a lot and would talk to me since she felt bad i was always alone#while everybody else played with each other ; and i don’t know why i just broke down thinking about how lonely i was at the time#i’d go to the school’s friendship room everyday after that because it was just a teacher who let kids come inside her room to play games if#they didn’t wanna be in the heat and soon i became friends w the teacher and she’d play uno with me everyday; mainly because the room was#relatively empty until they got loom bands! and i was an expert on loom bracelets so i would help others make them and that was a confidenc#e boost; i remember being proud of myself for socializing like that LOL#i just get sad thinking about that time; i like to think that if little Lyss saw me; she would be so proud because i have friends;#a boyfriend ; good grades ; and i’m well liked and regarded. i hope she’s proud of my progress socially because it was such a leap#i wish i could go back in time and tell her how much better things get and how she won’t be lonely forever#…and to not online date. definetly don’t do that one.
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in 20 pulls i lost my 50/50 to mona and then got yelan ....
i was on 0 pity 🧍♀️
#just genshin <3#welp. after 4 years i finally have mona :D#i was doing teehee pulls bc i havent played genshin since ive been away and didnt think id get anything but um. haha.#honestly NOT complaining tho bc yelan is such an amazing unit and it does open up more comps for me to use#i just gotta build her now 🧍♀️#now i actually wont be pulling for a while to build up funds#but what the fuck like genuinely 😭😭
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