#just an excuse to write about 2 things I like
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Dear My Dear -
an @forgettable-au fan-slideshow
At the end of their journey, Sans has remembered everything. And theres only one question on his mind now…
*now what?
Its lore time. omg theres so much-
The way ill organize this…lIll start with the GENERAL thing, before getting more spesific, and explain each slide in way too much detail.
THE BIGGER PICTURE
This is the hypothetical end to their journey. Sans and Papyrus remember what happened, and this is how Sans is handling it. A letter to Wingdings.
I was hesitant to make this at first for obvious reasons- we dont know how its gonna end!!! But I took this more as a “what if ?” scenario. IF they ever remember anything, how would Sans specifically, react? I mean thats gotta be tough.
Because of that though, lot of what happened to lead up to this is kept vague.
ill explain in way more detail how Sans got to the point of writing this letter, and how he feels in the end when I explain each slide individually. But the reason why, the MAIN ISSUE is…
Over the years, hes put so much effort into enjoying what he has. And- nothings even changed!!! So why does he feel so much has? Now that he remembers what he lost…WHO he lost. He cant help but have this voice in the back of his head that says “would it have been better if that never happened? if Papyrus never existed?” and of course he absolutely hates to think that! but the voice gets louder. Writing this letter, is an act of closure. Of laying to rest someone he never got to. Someone he never even really got to do much with.
(Excuse the shitty quality of the images- I promise they’re better. WATCH THE VIDEO)
my dear wingdings,)
Sans says “wingdings” here instead of “brother”. that’s important. Also its on a white void, showing a sorta “heavenly imagery” with the mention of Wingdings. Also Gaster is in a BLACK void, but hes talking about WD here, so, contradictions.
you never came back, and now…after remembering everything everything clearly i understand why.)
Sans and Papyrus are sitting by a fire at night. They are both sorta lost in their own worlds at the moment, but are more or less leaning on one another for comfort and support. They both need each other right now despite each other being the whole reason why they feel the way they do right now-
Papyrus is notably no longer wearing the white coat that somewhat resembles a lab coat. Symbolism! Growth!
(art note: I drew Sans as a lefty in this- cherish it. It was so hard to draw these hands at these angles- CHERISH IT.)
i don’t imagine you���ll receive this letter, but i, nonetheless, must send it. wingdings….oh ‘dings…)
the first part is somewhat of a self aware/sarcastic joke. Sans is writing this letter for himself- he doesn’t imagine Wingdings, the dead man, will ever see it. Nor would Gaster care to read it. Thats another important thing, this is NOT a letter for Gaster. This is a letter for Wingdings. which is for Sans
The star in the sky symbolizes a few different things- the main one being Wingdings ofc. But also Papyrus’ expectations of himself- which mainly come from who he was. He’s looking at it, reflecting, thinking of what Wingdings did, and what Papyrus has done. Who he is NOW, and if he ever was Wingdings.
Or if Wingdings just became him.
A square is a rectangle, but a rectangle isn’t a square type thing.
i was just starting to dream the silliest- the softest of dreams. i miss you. and i will always miss you.)
2 contradictions, what Sans used to think, vs what he knows now. The memories were fuzzy- he couldn’t remember The Royal Scientist, he just feels like he remembers some nice times. Before now knowing everything clearly. And he still misses it- slightly.
The reflections are blacked out at first, before showing their future selves. Before, there was no connection to the present because it wasnt true. It felt like/was 2 completely different things
but i cannot live like that.)
Sans can still tell, even without the rose tinted glasses view he used to have, he cant live missing the past and not living in the present. He always knew that, but repeating it here makes him feel better.
Pictured is Sans and Papyrus hiking up the mountain next to the city as the sun sets. Papyrus is in full view of the light, but is facing away in order to help Sans see it too. Symbolism!
and it seems you cannot live any other way.)
another reference to the fact that Wingdings cant live… at all now. But also an awareness that part of him lives on in Gaster. The thing that killed him.
I doubt hes going to change in any way by the end of the comics, he’s far to obsessive about angels and the player for childish stuff like “growth” and “changing for the better as a human being”
when i was with you, the world made sense. but now that we are apart, i see clearly that your world is not a world from which one can escape.)
When they were together, they knew what they wanted to be. They wanted to be scientists. But after being apart so long and experiencing so much uncertainty, Sans finds that mindset is unhealthy. Again, a lot of this is stuff he already knew, but is repeating to himself because after remembering everything, he feels as if hes back at square one.
As kids they would test echo flowers, for science purposes! We don’t know yet if WDs voice comes through on them, but I imagine not… maybe. But for this we’re gonna say no. Their speech bubbles are trying so hard to be circles- the scribbles also somewhat resemble stars because I thought that’d be fun.
But the last slide has it shown that he dug them out, also for science purposes!
He took the echo flowers from their roots, much later on in his lab career. That in itself isnt that bad, but it symbolizes that he doesn’t care much for taking things slow. He wants to test with echo flowers? **TAKES EVERY SINGLE ONE WITHIN A 100 MILE RADIUS**
Also the empty holes reflects sort of what happened after he died. All of the underground was left with holes to fill. Sans, a childhood/brother. Alphys, the royal scientist. Those are the main ones but he was THE ROYAL SCIENTIST im sure there were more (smaller) holes that may or may not have been filled.
Ok and the last thing the flowers being taken out represent- he took the ones specifically from when they were kids, and abandoned what was left for the grass to grow tall and the entire area to be, in general, a lot flatter. In his quest to basically never grow up and continue being the thing he KNEW he wanted to be since kindergarten- he’s taken everything and left the rest in the dust. He’s The Royal Scientist now, he “doesn’t need anything else.”
i’m so sorry. for everything. for everything long ago, and for starting up that machine again.
Sans knows he could have been better. He could have done things differently, and that thought messes with him, even before he remembered.
The 2nd image is Sans at Grillbys after another failed attempt to get Wingdings outside. Despite the fact that he could have done things differently, theres no real reason to be “sorry” But still, he cant help but feel like he should be. He could have done things differently- could have tried harder, and gotten Wingdings out more often- or at all.
Im not sure where the machine in Sans’ lab comes into play in this AU, but it worked for the purposes of this audio.
theres a good man within you, wingdings. but he is wrestling with a giant. and the giant WINS time and again.)
Before everything, there was still a good man inside Wingdings that Sans saw. But now that he’s Gaster he just cant see him ever changing... and yknow what hes probably right. Like Papyrus says! Anyone can be a good person if they just try!…Gaster just isnt trying
“Wins” being emphasized here, I enjoy, since its sorta a video gamey term. The giant hes wrestling is that/the player, after all. Also probably his ego
I also had fun with kid Wingdings and what he’s drawing. Ofc its all him and Sans plus silly little stars, but him being finished drawing Sans, but not yet finished drawing himself, symbolizes the fact that at that age he still didn’t really know what he wanted to be, I feel like Wingdings kinda remembers the past wrong. Sure he definitely had science on the mind, but younger kids are often filled with questions, he questions if thats truly where he’d be the happiest.
Thats the good man within him
you’ve broken my soul again, and i fear i have broken yours. and for that i will never forgive myself, but i need to let you go now.)
the star represents, again, Wingdings. And the moon represents Sans, which shines only under the Suns (Papyrus’) light.
The sun is beginning to rise, and Sans and Papyrus are beginning to leave. Sans puts out the fire, closing this chapter of his life.
Because of every reason he needed to relearn/re-reflect on listed here, hes ready to let Wingdings go now. Sans is the one to put out the fire here, and not Papyrus, cause this is from the perspective of how SANS handles putting this issue to rest. Papyrus can have his own fire to put out later
Another thing about putting out the fire, thats just kinda common knowledge to do especially at a public camping spot. Yknow what else is common knowledge to do so you dont disrupt the community?? NOT REPLANTING FLOWERS-
Its not that deep…but still-
i send you the radio you made many years ago when we were kids. not because i dont want it, but… because i care for it far too much and it reminds me too much of you.)
CALL BACK!!!!!!
Sans leaves this last memento to Wingdings, the last thing they have that has nothing to do with Papyrus. Because at this point theres no reason to keep it, in Sans’ mind at least. There’s also no reason to destroy it- Like he says, hes not leaving it out of malice, theres just no good that will come from keeping it and holding onto the past.
As the sun rises, here we see the brothers leaving. in contrast to before, Sans is helping Papyrus down. Helping him down from the spotlight, the expectations he’s set upon himself. Another kick that Papyrus still has much more to reflect on and think about, he’s still looking back at that light, at a shooting star, at everything he thought he wanted to be.
i hope one day you will find some kind people who with appreciate you. for it kept me thinking of you all these years.)
GASTER FOLLOWERS!!!
Despite everything, Sans still wants whats left of Wingdings, Gaster, to be happy and find something, anyone, that will give him true happiness. It’s left ambiguous however if they truly do, do that for him. If it’s at all healthy.
cause frankly i have no idea how theyll be included. but just like everything- i cant wait to find out
and i hope by returning it to you, i can finally be free. goodbye.
- your brother
As the sun rises, the star gets smaller and smaller and eventually the sun replaces it. Remember when I said Papyrus represents the sun? SYMBOLISM!!!
Also about that, the star shines brighter than anything, but the Sun is among a lot of clouds, depicting how isolated Wingdings is/was despite shining the brightest, vs Papyrus who also does indeed shine! but isn’t isolated whatsoever.
Now, remember when I said Sans saying “my dear wingdings” instead of “my dear brother” was important? well, he acknowledges that he is still Wingdings’ brother, despite everything. So he signs off as “your brother” but… He’ll always try to remember Wingdings fondly…but…he’s unsure if he considers Wingdings his brother anymore- just because of how much they’ve changed. Thats why the whole thing is called Dear My Dear.
the radio + letter remains there in the end. I briefly played with the idea of having them disappear as the sun came out, implying that Gaster took the radio and reas the letter, but that was before I realized it was much better for this to be for Wingdings specifically, not Gaster/Wingdings/whatever.
FINALE!!! PLUS SOME BEHIND THE SCENES INFO!!!
weeps pitifully this was probably the most fun i’ve had with a project/the most happy i’ve come out of one. Learned lots about my process’ and what works! so thats awesome It took a while to make, so theres a lot of stuff I changed or ideas I scrapped that I find interesting, so im gonna show some of that on my side/shitpost account, @o-sunny-day
also isnt this so awesome???? I got a computer so I got to post more images than just 10, THIS IS SO AWESOME!!!
Have a Merry Christmas, and a Happy New Year! Heres to being a bigger, better, and different person this year! except not really because despite everything its still you.
un-unless you…got shattered across time and space…. then you’re-
well I mean that-….. hm…
does that…? hmm, well��.
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HIII I HAD A THOIGHT THAT HAS BEEN KILLING MY MIND AND I NEED TO TELL IT TO SOMEONE OTHERWISE IM GNA EXPLODE
get this . everyone chilling at ramshackle dorm doing their own thing, yuu (and grimm by extension), ace and deuce sitting by the table talking about whatever crosses their mind
Eventually the conversation escalates to birthdays and holidays and ace asks how old Yuu is. Azul interjects with saying Yuu's age from the contract they signed a few months ago, but then Yuu pipes up and tells them that they're one year older than that.
Theres a small moment of confusion until it dawns onto Deuce that Yuy's birthday was a month or two ago and they never spoke a peep about it. Not even to grimm!! And when asked, Yuy makes an excuse like "that was when __ was kind of close to overblotting and I didn't want to make it about me because that'd be so nitpicky—"
It was based off an audio i heard and idk if i want to write it into a short drabble for myself i probably cant since im only on book 2 ueue). But like. its a fun prompt methinks. what would all of them do when they find out Yuu deliberately didn't say a thing about their birthday
🎊
You didn't tell them about your birthday?!
characters: Ace Trappola, Deuce Spade, Azul Ashengrotto, Grimm.
author's note: let's just pretend I didn't just post a request from almost 2 years ago 😭 I'm deeply sorry. also, I apologize for not uploading anything this month but I'm working on something big 🙏
warnings: none
Ace Trappola
For his Immediate Reaction, he is offended in the most dramatic way possible. He gasps like you’ve committed the ultimate betrayal.
Once he processes that you skipped celebrating because of an overblot situation, Ace feels a bit guilty. He won’t outright admit it, but his teasing becomes a little softer as a result.
He insists on throwing you an over-the-top, borderline ridiculous party.
“I’m talking about party hats for everyone and cake so big Grimm can’t finish it—well, maybe.”
His idea of a celebration is half a joke, but you know he’s secretly serious about making it memorable and deep down, he’s touched by how considerate you were and wants to make sure you never feel overlooked again.
Deuce Spade
Deuce is visibly upset, almost like he’s the one who forgot your birthday, feeling terrible for not realizing sooner.
“But Prefect, birthdays are important! You deserve to be celebrated!”
He gets way too worked up about making it up to you, like it’s a mission, he might also wonder if he’s a bad friend for not noticing your birthday had passed. He’ll pay more attention to your subtle hints in the future (even if you weren’t giving any).
"I won’t let this happen again. Next time, we’ll do something amazing. I swear.”
You swear his sincerity makes you feel just as guilty for not telling him.
Azul Ashengrotto
Acts unbothered on the surface but lowkey blames himself for not catching on sooner, especially since he prides himself on knowing useful details about everyone (and blackmailing them).
Azul will subtly try to make it up to you in his own way. Maybe he gives you a small but meaningful gift with a nonchalant...
“Consider this a late birthday present.”
He might tease you about this later saying something like...
“Oh, Prefect, you wouldn’t hide something as important as a birthday from us again, would you? It’s not wise to keep secrets from your allies.”
But the teasing is his way of showing he cares.
Grimm
“You didn’t even tell me, your best pal?! Unbelievable!”
He paces around the room dramatically, occasionally glaring at you with exaggerated betrayal.
As much as he tries to play it off as annoyance, it’s clear he’s genuinely hurt that you didn’t trust him with such important information.
“I live here! I’m supposed to know these things!”
His solution to everything is cake.
“Alright, let’s bake a cake right now. Wait, no—you bake the cake, and I’ll taste-test it!”
Grimm will insist on celebrating your birthday retroactively, even if it’s something small. He’ll demand a party and act like it’s all for you, but deep down, he just wants to feel like he’s making things right.
Overall, they argue over how to properly celebrate your next birthday. Ace wants chaos, Deuce wants heartfelt, Grimm just wants food, and Azul suggests something elegant but practical.
Despite their differences, they all agree on one thing: they’re not letting you keep secrets like this again. You can expect everyone to be hyperaware of your birthday next year—and they’ll make sure it’s unforgettable.
#twst x reader#twst headcanons#twst fanfic#twst wonderland#twst yuu#twst angst#twst scenarios#disney twst#twisted wonderland x reader#disney twisted wonderland#twst fluff#twst imagines#twst x you#twisted wonderland headcanons#twisted wonderland imagines#twisted wonderland scenarios#twisted wonderland#ace trappola#twst#azul ashengrotto#azul x reader#twst azul#ace x reader#ace trappola x reader#azul ashengrotto x reader#deuce spade x reader#twst deuce#deuce spade#twisted wonderland deuce#deuce x reader
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'Open When' Letters From Bakugo
Open When You Need a Study Break
I'm only writing this stupid thing because i have to. You've probably been staring at your damn books so long your brain's probably about to short-circuit. What the hell's the point of cramming if you're too fried to remember a single thing? You're just being a dumbass at this point. So here's what you're gonna do:
1. Get your lazy ass up. Yeah, move it. Stretch, walk around, do some laps- anything that doesn't involve sitting there looking like a half-dead zombie.
2. Eat something that isn't total crap. You can't run on chips and caffeine, idiot. You wanna pass or pass out?
3. Take a damn break. Watch something stupid, blast your music, whatever chills you out. Just don't waste all your time doom-scrolling on your phone, moron.
And listen up, you better not feel guilty for taking a break. If you burn out, all this studying will be for nothing. So take care of yourself, or I'll come over there and kick your ass into shape myself.
Oh, and don't even think about giving up. Not happening. You're not allowed to fail while I'm around, got it?
-Katsuki
P.S. When you're done, get back to it. No whining, no excuses.
#bakugo#bakugo katsuki#bakugo x reader#bakugo x you#bakugou katsuki#bakugou katsuki x reader#bakugou x reader#bnha bakugo katsuki#katsuki#katsuki bakugo fluff#katsuki bakugou#katsuki bakugo x reader#katsuki bakugo mha#mha bakugou#bnha bakugou#mha x reader#mha#mha fluff#bnha#bnha fanfiction
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while i am a proponent for higher education of all levels, i do understand it truly isnt for everyone.
that being said, please don’t rule out education in general just because higher education isn’t something that calls to you. you don’t need to go to college, but please continue to propel your learning in some way.
1. read books
-> i will never be able to recommend the public library enough. you don’t need to purchase all of these educational books, your library has them for you. and if they don’t, they will get them for you - just ask. i can vouch for this seeing as i am a librarian. if you prefer digital formats for a kindle/ipad, or prefer audiobooks, you can use your library card with the “libby” app or “hoopla” app. there’s no excuse to not use a public library if there is one available to you.
-> you don’t need to read as many educational books as you possibly can. instead, read whatever you’d like, as slow as you’d like, and apply what you learned. reading educational books and not practicing the lessons is pointless if you’re trying to expand your knowledge. read, apply, review results, adapt, repeat.
2. consume educational videos
-> you’re already on your phone. dedicate 10-20 minutes a day learning something. hold yourself accountable and set a timer on your phone to remind yourself to give this carved out time to watching something educational. find videos that make you stretch your brain. youtube and TEDtalks have endless hours of educational information for you for free.
-> if you have more time to spare, choose a documentary on your preferred streaming service rather than a TV show. maybe devoting 1 hour a week to this to start (again, set a timer.) if you don’t have streaming services, kanopy (with your library card), tubi, and soap2day are all free. take advantage of these, that’s what they’re there for.
3. pick a topic (or a few, preferably) that you genuinely want to learn more about
-> i always encourage to do 2 sets of learning side by side to even things out. when it comes to new topics choose one that’s fun for present you, and one that’s helpful for future you
-> fun learning for the present could be literally anything you want or anything you’re interested in at the moment
crochet
music writing
instrument playing
painting
sculpting
perfecting a recipe
&c.
-> helpful learning for the future could be something career related or anything to simply expand your knowledge outside of your immediate interests
finances/saving/investing
language learning
medical studies (make sure your resources are science backed. please reach out to me if you don’t know how to check validity of sources or don’t know what lateral research is and how to conduct it)
mental health studies (same warning as above)
coding (or anything tech related)
&c.
again, i will always recommend you get your AA degree at the very least. but if that’s not possible, don’t exclude learning in general because school-learning isn’t your thing. you don’t need to be a student to learn, but you need to continuously learn in order to be a human. education is a necessity. everyone loves to learn, if you don’t, you haven’t found your niche yet - i promise it’s out there.
i believe in you.
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3 things to say:
1- "being gay is when a married man cheat on wife with another man"- vivziepop's logic (her lgbtq representation is very conservative if you think about it)
2- I feel like fans know that vivziepop's writing is bullshit and full of pilot holes but they Don't care about it as long there's characters to fuck *cough* loona *cough*,people underestimate the power of horny lol and to this day I still don't understand the hype and praise for loona but this is how Internet works I guess
3- I usually don't care about ships and strange kinks as long it stays fictional and no real person is involved in it BUT i hate it when a creator push it in their "morality teaching shows" it's where I draw the line like you either make serious show about taking abuse seriously to spread awareness or a weird fever dream kink show made for gooners to enjoy, you can't have it both,vivziepop made hypersexuals look like bunch of freaks and stigmatised them even more. "Please guys have sympathy for this character for getting sexually harassed but please don't blame him for sexually harassing others cause trauma made him hypersexual and you have to deal with it, he's just coping!" Like wtf are you serious? There's different ways to coping with trauma including drawing fetishes and kinks and i see no problem with it but harassing others is not coping you are just being peirce of shit, her morality is so flawed what is she even trying to tell audience? Victims of SA become assholes and have free card to harassing others? Wtf? And Yes I am a proshipper and I hate HH/HB because I hate it when a show tell you it's ok to cheat and it's ok to sexually harassing others why? because you said that this show is meant to represent victims but you only made victims feel embarrassed even more about themselves and you backstabbed them like don't you realise when you say your shows is about victims your victims watch the show to feel comfortable and feel being understood only for them seeing angel dust being asshole and sir.pentious getting SA'd as a joke? where's the SA awareness? Like yes we know victims who read SA fanfic as coping exist but not all of them cope the same way and we thought you would tell us how terrible SA can be and how it effects victims horribly ,not using trauma to excuse their shitty behaviours? I hate seeing people getting hurt and I don't want to be near someone telling me that them being asshole is ok because "HB is like bojack horseman and told me it's ok because X And Y" like stfu if you truly know anything about bojack horseman you wouldn't even think of comparing the two also you're an adult and if a dumb cartoon made you harassing others then you weren't good person in the first place you bastard maybe talk to therapy instead because creating trauma to others will never help you also not to mention half of fanbase of HH/HB are minors thanks to lazyass parents and society gaslighting everyone with "if it's cartoon then it's for kids" but the audience is out of vivziepop's control do i am not gonna blame her for this one but all i know is that unlike adults who are aware and responsible for their actions minors brain is not fully developed and they can be misguided most of times so i am worried about them growing up with vivziepop's 'morality' so i don't know the solution of who is watching cartoon and i think we should normalizing shaming lazy parents like don't be a parent if you would just let internet babysitting your child instead of you doing it yourself parenting is called parenting for a reason you're called "parent" not "birth giver", why am I proshipper? Because I don't care about others ships but I don't like the She-ra's "lesbians can't be abusive! You must feel bad for your abuser and you owe them everything and you should forgive them" Message and vivziepop's "if you're in straight marriage and you find out you're gay just cheat oh and if you have trauma it's ok to be asshole" Message (I hope you understand what I am trying to say and I hope you understand we have same goals before you tell me I am terrible as abusers just because i don't care about others ships and believing that fictional things doesn't matter as long it's fictional)
Alright I am done,scream at me I guess
The fans would also fill in the holes regarding Helluva Boss and doesn’t help that Vivziepop would like tweets about it. Don’t like tweets of your fans defending your show. Put and write it into your dialogue not on Twitter 😭
Yeah, Vivziepop has a huge problem of wanting her cake and eating it. Like what you mentioned Anon, the sexual assault jokes then another moment taking it seriously. Rinse and repeat. The moral compass in Hazbin Hotel and Helluva Boss is so wish-washy.
Successfully killed straight married couple. Cool. Oh no, Blitzø doesn’t have the guts to kill a gay couple. Woahh apparently it’s character development (despite Blitzø fighting over a parking lot like an Anon in my last ask mentioned, happily participating in a Wrath competition in Millie’s hometown, killing lumberjacks, happily will screw over the cherubs, etc etc).
Most of the characters especially if a character is Vivziepop’s favorite, don’t get held accountable and when they do have a chance to be called out, it’s usually downgraded in some way or there is some excuse in said action.
Its funny you bring up the children in Hazbin Hotel/Helluva Boss because there was literally a situation where like what a 9-10 year old was at a Hazbin convention asking Blake Roman an inappropriate question regarding Angel Dust. It is so mind boggling to watch. Hazbin and Helluva are supposed to be for adults (+18) but the both shows don’t seem adult despite covering big topics like rape, kinks, etc. It feels like 2 kids in a trench coat attempting to sneak into a R rated movie.
At the day it’s the parent’s responsibility and they should be called out. It also doesn’t help that a few voice actors like Amir encourage kids and parents to watch Hazbin Hotel, despite Vivziepop expressing multiple times it’s for adults. I don’t know if he changed his mind about kids accessing Hazbin Hotel but I hope he does.
Vivziepop could potentially age gate Helluva Boss (I’m not talking about the warning sequence from Helluva Boss that flashes for 5-10 seconds every episode). But like manually do this:
But Vivziepop would lose some more views if that happened. Otherwise there isn’t much she can do.
#vivziepop critical#vivziepop criticism#anonymous#hazbin hotel critical#hazbin hotel criticism#helluva boss critical#helluva boss criticism
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So you're a go to source for all things Dick&Tim bros and you tend to write primarily from Dick's POV. So, odd question, but if you were to summarize their relationship from his POV in FIVE panels which panels would you pick? Keeping in mind that one specific aspect of their relationship that you love needs to be clearly represented by each panel (loyalty, trust etc). I hope this is a fun challenge and not an annoying question so if you don't want to answer that's cool! Have a wonderful day!
No more talk. The same thoughts run through two minds... (SotB 29) / You're my equal. My closest ally. (RR 1) / I can't stop thinking how much I rely on him. (GoG 3)
25 Feelings Dick Has About Tim
This was such a kind ask & a cool challenge which I totally failed; here are TWENTY-five panels of Dick's POV on Tim sdfdsfds Look, I got carried away! Marcia and Cindy! The boys!!
OKAY SO BEFORE I GET TO THE PANELS A FEW NOTES:
WARNING THAT THERE ARE SOME NEGATIVE EMOTIONS IN HERE because I love conflict but but but you gotta remember those are not the final word!! They are complicated people and sometimes they get mad at each other BUT ultimately their relationship is so hugely important in both their lives & they love each other and rely on each other so much -!!! <3
Also I have CONCLUDING THOUGHTS at the end about what Dick's POV leaves out (mostly: a lot of Dick defending & protecting & supporting Tim, which Dick does instinctively but isn't very self-aware about most of the time)
I have loosely organized my list into 5^5 format (5 categories with 5 examples each!), so if you want to skip to a relevant one, here are the categories!!
Below the cut:
I hate him and find him infuriating (#1-5)
On second thought, he's endearing & fun (#6-10)
Grief is complicated & he's all tangled up in mine (#11-15)
I love him & think highly of him (#16-20)
I rely on him & though it's hard for me, I trust him (#21-25)
I hate him and find him infuriating (#1 - 5)
1) He thinks he’s so smart and can psychoanalyze me and Bruce, but he doesn’t know me at all, he should get lost (New Titans 61)
2) He thinks he’s so smart and can psychoanalyze Bruce but he doesn’t know Bruce at all, he should get lost (Gotham Knights 26)
3) He is so nosy about stuff that is MY business (Robin 0)
4) He sounds like an insincere suck-up half the time... but okay, fine, if you push him he's got a sense of humor about it (New Titans 65)
5) I'm sure he's a better vigilante than me. It's my fault for being a failure, but I resent him anyway. (Nightwing 9 - Dick's having a nightmare)
On second thought, he's kinda endearing (#6-10)
6) He worries too much and gets anxious so easily, but it makes him fun to tease (Robin 67)
7) I'm not that competitive - okay, so maybe I'm a little competitive, I gotta make sure he doesn't get a swelled head (Prodigal)
8) I'm supposed to be his favorite! It is not cool for him to be fanboying over my not-girlfriend's not-boyfriend!! (Birds of Prey 19)
9) We have fun together. I can kick back and relax when it's just the two of us. Plus I get to boss him around a bit. (Prodigal)
10) He’s always trying to reassure me, and I guess it's a little comforting, but also he doesn’t really get it. Or me. He makes excuses that he shouldn't, because he doesn't understand that I suck. (Nightwing 64)
Grief is complicated and he's all tangled up in mine (#11 - 15)
11) He reminds me of everything I try not to think about. Sometimes the memories are so strong it hurts to look at him. (Batman 441)
12) WHY IS HE BEING IMPOSSIBLE ALL OF A SUDDEN??? THIS IS SO FRUSTRATING (Nightwing 139)
13) We're the same. He says all the things I don't let myself think about. It's like arguing with myself. (Nightwing 139)
14) He thinks he gets to tell me what to do but he doesn’t, fuck him (Battle for the Cowl)
15) Life sucks, so what. I sucked it up so he should too (RR 1)
I love him and think highly of him (#16 - 20)
16) He’s the closest thing to a brother I’ll ever have. If someone hurts him I will hurt them harder. (Nightwing 6)
17) I can't handle the idea of losing him. (Nightwing 97)
17) He’s so good and I’m not. I'm afraid I’m bad for him. (Nightwing 110)
18) He’s better than me, and it’s kind of a relief because I know no matter what he’ll be okay. (Gates of Gotham 3)
19) In my head he’s the responsible one. (Gotham Knights 10)
I rely on him, and though it's hard for me, I trust him (#20-25)
20) I know I have to trust him but I'm afraid he'll make the wrong choices and get hurt (Nightwing 139)
21) I'm sure I know what he should do because I see myself in him - not that I can take my own advice, but he should (Blackest Night 3)
22) I trust him. When I’m losing my grip on things, he pulls me back. (Gotham Knights 10)
23) I want him to trust me (Red Robin 12)
24) He can tell when I'm lying. Sometimes he sees my weaknesses better than I wish he did. (Detective Comics 874)
25) He’s always there when I need him. (Teen Titans / Outsiders Secret Files)
Final rambling thoughts:
TIM: Uhh, okay, so I'm just skimming this list - do you really trust me? you're not just saying that? - but anyway, I'm confused because you left some stuff out? Like some stuff that's kinda important? DICK: No? I think I got everything? TIM (starts counting on his fingers): The time I was having a bad day but then I called you. The time I got captured by Two-Face but then you saved me. The time I fell off a train but then you saved me. The time I fell off a building but then you saved me. The time I fell off a different building - DICK: I feel like you're trying to make some kind of point but I'm not sure what it could be.
SO THE THING IS, I put 25 panels in here and not a single one has Dick catching Tim when he’s falling!!! But I think that's a central motif of their relationship from Tim’s POV, not Dick’s. I love Dick, but in some ways I think he is spectacularly un-self-aware.
And I think he especially has a lot of blind spots about Tim. He kinda intermittently gets that Tim admires him, and he enjoys it in a playful I-get-to-boss-you-around way. But Dick tends to consistently underestimate all of his own good qualities & skills, and he meets Tim at a point in his life when he's especially down on himself & his abilities. And so he's unable to see his own influence on Tim, & therefore unable to fully understand a lot of Tim's priorities and loyalties and motivations, because you can't actually understand Tim without understanding Dick's impact on him. There's a fascinating moment in Bruce Wayne: Murderer when Dick's completely blindsided & upset to discover that Tim doesn't entirely trust Bruce, even though this has been a definitive fact of Tim's whole thing ever since he showed up with his Batman needs Robin theory, and Barbara has to actively remind Dick of the obvious-to-everyone-except-Dick fact that a lot of Tim's loyalty is to Dick, and Tim loves Bruce but feels free to be more wary of him. (And to give Bruce credit: this is not something he ever begrudges.) But anyway Babs points this out, and Dick manages to sorta process it for about five seconds, but he cannot actually accept it into his worldview so instead he discards it at the speed of light and goes off and has an argument with Tim instead sdfsfdsf
All of Dick's virtues - Dick's kindness at the circus and Dick's determination to fight through grief and Dick's rigid sense of morals and Dick's vigilante skills and every time Dick has ever backed Tim up or listened to him or protected him or saved him from something or just been casually kind to a stranger in Tim's presence etc etc etc - all these things loom really large in Tim's mental story of Who Dick Is, and What Dick And Tim's Relationship Is. Tim meets Dick before he meets Bruce, trusts Dick more than Bruce, aspires to be Robin instead of Batman. And so in Tim's default version of the story, Dick is the super-special and admirable hero and Tim is... nobody in particular, a tagalong outsider who's barely managing to be a hero, not part of Dick and Bruce's family and not part of their story, who, if he's VERY LUCKY and tries REALLY HARD, might be able to fight his way to proving himself and offering something to Dick that Dick will value, if Dick doesn't get fed up with him first.
But that's not Dick's version of the story!!!
Dick's version of the story is almost the exact opposite, a story where Dick's an outcast failure black sheep who's screwing up everything he tries, and meanwhile Tim is The Sudden New Perfect Robin Who's Better Than Me And Probably Bruce Loves Him More And Probably They Gossip About What A Loser I Am, mixed with a complicated edge of Tim Thinks He's So Smart But He Doesn't Know Me/Us At All. Dick gets much more attached to Tim over time, and Tim gets unnervingly better at the know-it-all psychoanalysis so then Dick gets to have complicated feelings about him being right instead of just annoyance at him for being wrong, plus Dick's relationship with Bruce improves a lot, so Tim stops feeling so threatening. But Dick never fundamentally changes his basic theory of their relationship in which Tim is highly impressive and capable, and Dick is not so much.
And so asking Dick about Tim is kinda like if you asked George Bailey to tell you about Harry Bailey in It's A Wonderful Life; like, you'll be there for five hours while he tells you how great Harry is, and how accomplished Harry is, and how he doesn't really get how or why Harry does the things he does, and maybe George does feel a little resentful or jealous sometimes, but that pales in comparison to all his admiration and trust for Harry who he loves so much, who's better than him in so many ways, and he's not gonna openly gripe but secretly he can't help but feel sometimes like he's such a failure in comparison to Harry, a perfect person who emerged fully formed from Zeus's head with all the virtues and also all the accomplishments, etc. etc. etc. --
-- and he will not actually remember the part where he changed and saved Harry's whole entire life unless you literally send him to an alternate timeline in order to force him to remember it. <3
#i enjoyed thinking about this so much i wrote a novel with All My Thoughts sorry sdfsdfs#tim drake#dick grayson#somewhat tangential but as i was writing this i was thinking about zahri's post#about how different types of stories offer different kinds of emotional payoffs#and i think for me for dick and tim the main two payoffs are:#1) someone who sees & understands your grief for deaths that will never get fixed or get better#and who will face your ghosts with you EVEN WHEN you're also mad at each other#2) someone who you look at and you see all the ways that you suck & he's better & you're a loser who's failed him etc etc#but it turns out that you're wrong. that you're good enough. not that none of the failures were real or that they were all in your head#but it turns out that it's okay that you didn't always immediately do or feel the right thing#and it's okay that you weren't perfect. you can fuck up six thousand ways & everything you did right will still matter#not because of making excuses or allowances or somebody pityingly trying to make you feel better#but because in the end the things you did right are just Genuinely More Valuable than anything you did wrong#all the times you tried & everything that you tried to give - everything you think wasn't good enough - it was.#IN OTHER WORDS they are both convinced they're not good enough & they are both wrong <3#anyway dick and tim are both INCREDIBLY SIMILAR and also CONSTANTLY misreading each other and i love that for them#and like. they will sometimes totally misread each other & then never figure out the part that they misunderstood#but then they manage to keep going anyway. we love each other on purpose <333#ask tag#dick&tim
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(OC Lore and design time!)
(it got longer again ... sorry ... idk how to make things short, i just need to talk, but i guess if you can read the written stuff in the pic thats the barest bare bones of what i wrote here)
i was asked what new lore story stuff i had thought about that made me sad which i mentioned a bit ago, and while that is too hard to explain given all the missing context i thought i could at least talk about lore having to do with it :D
so, (Lord) Eadrya is one of my fav OCs (big blue lad, here a rough sketch in humanoid form) they are both one of if not THE most powerful demon alive and the most battle trained;
at the mid point of the story the demon world gets invaded by the celestials (the angel inspired things i talked about in the previous lore post with Xaror) and Shargon, as the king, should be their first and only frontline, but at this point his life is only being sustained by maschinery after being mortally wounded, he cannot fight (he realizes what is going on, rips himself off the maschinery to get at least his youngest child to safety, barely managing it before dying- the guardian, the demons god, takes over his body to attempt to fight against the celestials but cant keep itself alive long enough since its host is already dead) Eadrya takes the role of the frontline fighter (despite being very full of themselves and aggressive they care about their 'job' of protecting their own, also giving them the chance to show off just how strong they are); the fight was going well for them all things considered, but when the guardian activates it drains the power of all elemental lords (which Eadrya is one of, and since they have the most strength it also takes the most from them), so much so that they lose the fight and suffer deadly wounds (the worst being a spear through the chest made of a material that grows hard, root-like formations when in contact with demonic blood like a fungus but worse, also stopping any self healing processes) after the guardian falls apart it creates a huge shockwave of energy that stuns every living thing within a certain distance and possibly more-
Eadrya (in true demon form, so like a blue whale in size at least) was likely taken through an active gateway to the human world in a large tidal wave also created by the guardians fall; they wash up in the harbor of a small secluded village, the head of which is 'lady 13'; although never having seen a demon before and everyone being afraid (largely thinking its a strange hurt animal, only she suspected otherwise), they still gather all villagers to pull out the celestial spear, which is diffcult and brutal given that its already taken root, but the village lacked both knowledge and means to help any other way- doing so damaged their heart which is how they were able to collect samples of all three demonic blood types ('normal' -red like humans-, energy -essentially purely magic- and heartblood -highly concentrated energy only found within the heart of a demon and the only one to contain genetic material) (this is the start of Eadryas character arc, having to deal with the fact that their world is likely destroyed, them failing what they didnt think they could fail, having lost a battle so badly (even if not really their fault) for the first time and not knowing if literally anyone else has survived .. also being now stuck in the human world, which they dont like)
Lady 13 (placeholder name? stands for experiment 13) is a human that was tricked by demon hunters to enroll into a series of experiments trying to create hybrids of demons and humans, which they hoped would be powerful and easily controllable tools for their endeavours, though the two are inherently not compatible, they tried grafting body parts of demons on humans to make them compatible- all experiments failed except for her, more or less, though she never got to see the hybrid she carried and was then told it had died too, they threw her out believing she wouldnt survive much longer either and all such experiments were cancelled due to the high cost of human life, research material (demons are still rare) and upkeep with no successful results Lady 13 survived though (perhaps even via the pirates picking her up?) and she ended up living in said small village far away, hiding her half demonic body, though most know there soemthing 'wrong' with her (her being this tall when it doesnt fit the rest for one), only few know the full extent; she enjoys the life she has now, perhaps on the more poor side but safer and more loved than ever before; she largely lead the efforts to try and help Eadrya when they ended up in the harbor, though there wasnt that much anyone could do it was still enough- they leave immediately after waking up, but return after really having nowhere to go and struggling to deal with everything that has happened; over time (probably years) they start to open up towards the people there (though not .. very much) enough to get rather close with Lady 13 too- she actually falls madly in love but after Eadrya (extremely aro/ace) rejects all her attempts quite clearly she respects their boundaries
However, after hearing news of potential demon sightings Eadrya decides to leave in hopes of not being the last demon left after all; Lady 13 then decides to reveal her secret to them (though hearing and seeing what lengths hunters would go to for their experiments makes them absolutely seething with rage- she insists on not being out for revenge) and asks if they would be willing to donate a small amount of heartblood; shes always wanted to be a mother but is now incompatible with humans too- through things she picked up back at the experiments facillity, hers and her doctors research she is sure that is all that is needed, she dares to ask since she does not know when, if ever, she will meet another demon, much less one she could actually trust enough for this though Eadrya hesitates (why would she want to go through the same thing again that didnt work and threatened her life, if it does work, do they want to be involved with any of this? what if hunters find out it worked after all?) but after her ensuring that they would have no part in it other than giving up a little blood and would not be considered a parent in any way, nor made responsible for anything that might happen to her, but considering it all in the end they agree to it
only for her to reveal shes had a small bottle of it already, along with multiple samples of the other types, which she collected when Eadrya was bleeding out into the harbor not knowing if they will survive, though not wanting to make use of it without their consent either way (they are actuallly rather touched by this)
alot later the main group returns here and it turns out to have worked (though she is unable to walk/bedridden for a long while bc it did alot of damage to her body, which can heal since its demons parts, but only really slowly bc she does not have a full functioning system and no demonic blood of her own -she uses the other samples for the healing process-) though its a little awkward to explain, especially considering that 13.1 took alot after Eadrya xD (their theory as to why it worked so "well" that time is that even though the sample was already taken, them giving their consent for it still made it less likely to be rejected; demons dont need partners to have offspring, and all can do it, they just have to decide to- so them agreeing to it, even though its long been outside their body, still had an effect on the blood sample)
#ganondoodles#art#ocs#original art#oc lore#demons#monsters#WHY does writing things liek this take me so long#i spent two hours again on this and im falling asleep as we speak bc its almost 2 am#ANYWAY this was alot again ... sorry#but its a relatively new storyline that i have been afraid of telling#since it touches on things im afraid might come across wrong and uses themes im a lil uncomfy with#but i found it interesting ... and works well with eadrya as a character bc it challenges alot about them#yes im wrote and mean this genuinely#i would have made the cut from her human body to the demon parts more smooth ... but this hard cut is the point#so that she looks rather normal on the upper part and can hide the rest#thoguh im unsure about the color scheme and if maybe i should be more creative with the demons parts#then again its largely just legs lol#if anyone actually reads this ........ i hope it comes across correctly#i like to use darker and more mature themes but am riddled with anxiety over how it will be understood#im gonna work on zelda comic stuff again now .. sorry for all the oc spam#but if there are questions PLEASE feel free to ask im pretty sure i have answers to almosst anything?#also i havent thought of a name for her or the kid .. though im starting to like lady 13#13.1 wont do as a name though poor kid deserves a proper name after already being a weird hybrid that shouldnt exist#either way ... going to bed now GOODNIGHT q-q#(any typos are excused by me being deadly tired ok)
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Things I make for myself when insomnia kicks in
Just a chart about what I wanna change up and keep consistent in my art - I mainly wanna draw Raph with a tail because he deserves one, it fits too well. Donnie gets a long tail too because I didn’t realize how dino-like he looks until I gave him one, and now it’s a must for me haha.
#rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rottmnt headcanons#note these are veryyy much for my own art so by all means ignore this completely for your own unless it resonates#these are just my personal headcanons#I’ve been getting more and more fond of the turtles having tails - especially Raph whose design honestly feels more complete with one#I also am now attached to Donnie having a long tail too because 1) he looks cute with one and it really works for him and-#2) I LOVE giving the Brains and Brawn duo more stuff in common#I could write an essay about how many things Brains and Brawns duo has in common in general#but also portal duo as well!!#we already know that Mikey and Leo look a LOT alike#so I think it’s cute when Raph and Donnie have stuff like that in common with each other too#like how canonically Donnie’s sclera are on the yellow side like Raph’s#anyway I’m sorry if this is a random post I am very tired and still have not slept#ALSO yeah i wanted an excuse to doodle April it’s been too long i missed her#I’m excited to finish this comic up to show the OTHER reason I gave Donnie a long tail#I made this in like five minutes because working on my comic was not working out#also Draxum totally has a tail he’s a sheep#I lean away from Mikey and Leo having longer tails mainly because their designs are already so busy#with all the colors and shapes present on them#so to me longer tails kinda takes away a bit#meanwhile Raph and Donnie are more monochrome in comparison so I feel like tails only help them?#I think as well Donnie’s torso/carapace being on the shorter side makes a tail balance him out#(me trying to justify the visual gag im putting into the comic for literally only two panels)#didn’t draw the caseys because I am tiredddd#and they would have just ended up where April is anyway
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It’s a shame we probably won’t see anymore of the Badminton twins in the new season of ofmd. If they did show up would probably be one of their wives but with a letter.
How I imagine it they pan to one of the Badminton’s wives in a room ether reading, or knitting next to a bassinet. A butler comes in with the letter, telling her she has a letter about her husband. We don’t see her face yet but after a bit we see her sobbing into the letter. Soon her kids come in asking, “what is wrong, mother?” We turn to the children and it’s normal children but with, Rory Kinnear’s face but with normal children voices.
We pan back to the mom and we see her face. It’s, Rory Kinnear too but with makeup. She tells them that their father is dead while dealing with pirates. After a bit of sniffling from the wife, she softly says, “it’s such a shame too. My husband only saw our new born for a bit before leaving”. We then pan to the baby in the bassinet, and it’s also just, Rory Kinnear sucking on a pacifier.
#tumblr#shitpost#fandoms#ofmd season 2#ofmd#our flag means death#our flag means death season 2#but the thing about the baby#instead of using a real or a fake baby#they are pulling an icarly#you know#when spencer is in that baby costume when they do the skits#that’s what the baby just looks like but with Rory Kinnear face#nigel badminton#chauncey badminton#ofmd s2#ofmd meme#excuse my writing btw#i haven’t written fanfic in years#also if anyone wants to draw this idea#be my guest#it will be super funny
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sorry i keep telling myself im done bitching about da on here but then it keeps happening
#like. idk it rubs me the wrong way how some people are trying to just Make Stuff Up to ignore criticism#like i get being defensive of the thing you like. i also like dragon age#i've been posting this game literally since 2013 i've spent over 100hrs playing veilguard so far#the last 2 months have just been me playing these games. writing about these games. enjoying them#like this is just a part of me engaging with this art#because it is very flawed. but i like it and i want it to be better#and i think we should be able to discuss these flaws without people bending over backwards to wave them away#or make excuses for the writers and the decisions they made
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Don't know how controversial of a take this is (not very I assume) but I don't really like I Am Me it's painfully generic lyric and sound-wise and it also doesn't really fit into the show that well
#stex#it's cool you wanna add a 'girlpower' type song or whatever but like.the show doesn't reflect that.#the main female character's motivation's and archs still entirely revolve around their (usually male) love interests#*arcs#starlight express' sexism is best solved by diversifying the casting#cast male actors as coaches; cast female actors as literally any character that isn't a coach#there's nothing wrong with having characters that want and strive to have romantic partners#(which is what a lotta & a whole lotta locomotion were about the coaches' desires for a good engine)#you can keep these songs there is nothing wrong with them.#the problem was that only the coaches prioritized romance like that and only the coaches were female (originally)#only the female characters cared so heavily about and had their whole personalities revolve around romance. THAT was the issue#not that there were characters that cared about romance#the best way to fix that is have more female characters literally problem solved. maybe throw in a male coach too idk#don't write a new (kind of mid) song that does not fit into the story#the song is all about how they're strong on their own and don't need anyone else. but Dinah and Pearl's plotlines still revolve around#their love interests (or rather THEIR roles as love interests)#do you get. what I mean.#the song isn't in harmony with the contents of the show. it's saying one thing but the show is saying something else#and it just rings hollow as a result#uhm. it's about 2:30 in the morning excuse typos and clunky grammar and all that
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Amazon: HEEEY!~ Hazbin hotel is getting a second season!
Me: Oh okay, that's cool I guess.
Amazon: They'll be even MORE action this season!! We're gunna focus on Alastor's backstory, and Pentious will be a key character, and Vox is gunna be a more prominent protagonist, and we'll show off more overlords, and Vaggie and Charlie get a "sexy life"~
Me: Uh-huh. And I can only assume that this season has a bigger episode count so that any of those plot points you mentioned have time to breath for more then ten minutes unlike season 1?
Amazon:
Me:.....You're gunna give this season time to breath ri-
Amazon: WE HAVE MERCH AT HOT TOPIC NOW TOO!!~
.
(Incase people don't read the tags: The reason this annoys me so much isn't because I hate the show, it's because I want this show to do well. I want this show to make me feel like I should care for any of it's characters and plot points because it's well made, not because it's been created by an artist who is already popular online. I truly believe the animators and voice actors are giving it their all for this show, the voice acting is honestly the best quality in my opinion and everyone nails their roles, but the writing and pacing has so far been a cluster fire.
This is a legit show now, it's being funded by Amazon's money with literal broadway stars as parts of the cast. If season 1 taught the people creating this show anything it's that there needs to be breathing time for the plot points and the characters, and I sincerely hope that season 2 takes this into account. I doubt it with how much they've said they're going to include, but I really hope that, for animation as a whole - cuz god knows Disney hasn't been pumping out good animated movies as of late - season 2 takes into account what season 1 did poorly and improves on it)
#stfg-#If the voice acting in season 1 wasn't as stunning as it was I would be totally lost on this show#tbh I kind of am the voice acting is the only thing keeping me semi hooked#We can't really say the animation is great still cuz....it's being funded by Amazon's money now soooo what did we execpt?#You'd think after the shitstorm the pacing was in season 1 and the writing that they'd learn the show needed a bigger episode count#But NOOOOOO lets just throw in MORE plot points! And MORE characters because we DON'T HAVE ENOUGH ALREADY!#Just throw even more story into this dumpster fire cuz THE FANS WILL GET IT!! THE FANS WILL LOVE ANYTHING CUZ IT'S HAZBIN!!~#For the record: I want to confirm the reason I'm so annoyed is because I WANT this show to good#I want it to be well written and I want it to make me care about the characters#I want this show to make me feel like I should care because so far I don't#The writing is all over the place the pacing so far has been whack and Charlie doesn't evedevelop a deep connection with any of the#characters in the show aside from her pre-established girlfriend#Season 2 had better show some improvement writing and pacing wise because there isn't an excuse now#This is a legit show being funded by Amazon's money the writing needs to be better
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mildly annoyed today and turning evil about it
#it's not about this but i did just see that damn ursula le guin quote Again and it is starting to get to me#like yeah i get it i fucking get it but also shut uppp#i am not 'refusing to admit' that bad things are bad i am 1. telling lies. bc that's what fiction is for#2. seeking catharsis. bc that's what fiction is for#3. trying to confront u with the uncomfortable truth that people who have done bad things are people#'bad' people deserve human rights. hashtag grimdark hashtag no fun hashtag kicking puppies#also it's an out of context quote From A Work Of Fiction so idfk what le guin actually thought or meant#but ppl keep sharing it in a hashtag inspirational hashtag hopepunk way and it's sooo annoying#also like the fact that ppl who say these things so often talk about *evil* like it's a state of being#like EVIL PEOPLE (kind of person that definitely exists) aren't ever interesting or complex and Shouldn't be the focus of your art#(bc examining them must mean excusing or endorsing them somehow or at very least distracting from more Virtuous Matters)#hmm. yeah you're why i'm writing this#'cool motive still murder' thats it youre going in the labyrinth -> -> ->#like yes. it is ofc possible to get too deep into What A Fascinating Twisted Mind etc etc#but also. rargrgrgrgrgrgghrghhhh
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It's dark outside, just after dusk when the lamps are still lighting themselves, and the world can't yet decide if it's dark or light.
There's very few people out, some walking dogs that you get to pet, others driving cars that splash in puddles leftover from an earlier rain. None of this bothers you, it never has. The city's always like this; quiet, serine, dull and bright all at once.
You pass by an alleyway, the rhythmic tap-tap-tap of your footsteps sound loud in the space between buildings, echoed from the darkness. You pause
"Pst!" I call out, the dim light from a nearby lamppost glaring off my glasses. I step closer to you, only by a half step. You take a full step away, though you don't run.
I watch the street cautiously, not fully leaving the confines of the alley between skyscrapers. I beckon you over. When you don't come closer, I allow myself another step closer. You don't move.
I open my overcoat, the lavender seeming much darker in the setting. I lock eyes with you. "You wanna know the ending to story I've only told you about once before?"
You shake your head, and keep walking. I slink back into the shadows.
You hesitate for a moment before ultimately agreeing. This time, when I motion you closer, you come.
With another look around, I reach into the inner pocket of my coat. Quickly, I pull out a single piece of folded paper and shove it into your hands. Before you can say anything, I disappear back into the shadows. You look after me, but I am no longer there.
You hold the folded paper in both hands and away from your body, staring at it for a long moment. The edges are burned, and it's crinkled like it's been crumbled into a ball.
Opening the note, you find the ink is completely unmarred, though the handwriting is a bit messy. It reads:
Marco watched the wooden box get lowered into the hole in the ground. Gently, he held the same thing that had brought him and the others back the first time in his fist. As he turned to leave the grieving pirates, he thought about the consequences of his actions. Every time someone goes back, at least one thing is different then it was in the first timeline. A thought struck him. What if he could choose the differences? What if the fate of the brothers played to his plan? Like a game of poker, he could deal the cards. If he played his cards right, then he'd place the winning hand in the end. He could save Ace. He could save Luffy. He could save everyone! He just had to deal the cards. Marco flew off in his phoenix form to a secluded part of the island and recited the same words Luffy had not so long ago. ‘This time,’ he resolved himself as he was engulfed in a bright light, ‘I’ll do it right.’ And then he was gone. End Book One
The paper starts to smolder as you read, turning itself to ashes in your hands by the time you finish. Like sand being scooped by a fork, the ash falls from your hands and is carried off by the winds.
You look for street signs or landmarks, trying to commit this alley to memory. Perhaps, you think, I may be around again to give you more stories, more things to occupy your mind with; to pull you from reality. And, who knows? Maybe I will be
#Hey! I did a thing#choose your own adventure#but only kind of#random#writing#my writing#this is just an excuse#i was gonna show you at some point anyway#maybe#this is just me being silly#did you like it?#one piece fic#this is 1 of 2 that i'm working on#though you already have the first part of the other one#anyway#this is all you get of this one for now#i hope it haunts the back of your mind#coming up at inconvenient moments and distracting you#only for you to forget about it until the next time you're reminded#have fun
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The problem with my art right now is that 1) the little drawing time I have goes to @daily-basil ; 2) I have phases, and am currently deeply unmotivated ; and 3) when I do draw what this blog is currently about (Arsenic) I draw him in a gay way (because I love him deeply) and not like the unhinged person he actually is. I'm sorry I'm so soft about him right now. Yes I want Sunny and him to tear each other apart but they also need to love each other so so so much first
#siiiiiiigh...#im sorry i need him to hold sunny gently and tells him he loves him and yes he'll say it in horrible unhinged ways BUT#poor man who does not know how to love and does not know he can be loved. he is convinced he needs to manipulate people to make them stay#writing down arsenic lore for tosteur like two days ago made me so emotional about him. shaking and crying#there's not even like An Event it's just that his whole childhood sucks and he's never been accepted by anyone and he's so lonely and#(starts crying)#he does horrible horrible things but all he does to sunny truly comes from love. deeply inhumane and twisted love but love nonetheless#(except when he's being a selfish ass who doesn't have any sort of morals and generally doesn't give a shit about other people. of course)#god he's such a horrible person (/simplification) i love him#he does not care about hurting other people and only cares about his own selfish desires#he thinks he can do anything he wants and if other people get hurt by his actions it's not his problem#don't you DARE touch a single hair on sunny's head. not in a 'i care about my bf' way btw.#but because if sunny gets hurt. he has to deal with that and 1) it's boring unless it brings him something and 2) that's *his* plaything.#even when he does nice things for sunny he doesn't make it just to make sunny happy#he does it so that sunny will associate happiness with him and stay.#that's what he thinks consciously at least. he always had ulterior motives for everything he does#it doesn't really make him calculating because it's automatic at this point. it just makes him deeply selfish#my poor little boy who has never had anyone genuinely care about him before...#which doesn't excuse shit of course but hhhh i love him so much.#(D if you see this. this is about the OC not the guy. of course)#arsenic#rant#sometimes i think about nick like a normal person ('he's so awful and interesting') and sometimes i just slhrflfbfb. (cries)
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there's a point at which someone's fear of being a dick wraps back around to them just being a dick anyways
#im side-eyeing those who reblogged my post on ethnocentrism and missed the point#but im also thinking about the tags i saw on being too scared to comment on fic#the first is being ~too scared~ to write cultures other than their own#(1. my point was people should be learning *as they watch the show* not just when they write#2. i just. jfC. stop saying youre too scared to *try* to write from another culture/POV different from your own as tho its a *good* thing)#the second is just annoying/frustrating because being too scared to participate in community is how community's die#i dont want to be dismissive of cancel culture because i do know the stories and there is always indv cases of a person ready to be a dick#but like. its just *not* a thing most people have to be worried about. very likely you're just not big enough to have that concern.#anxiety's no joke but like. u dont just accept the anxiety as the excuse. you have to challenge it. i've been there but u cant feed it.#and i dont want to sound dismissive of that anxiety but im really frustrated with seeing people throw that excuse around#without considering how their fear-based attitudes/actions come off in turn#such as not showing fandom creatives any appreciation for fear of saying the ~wrong~ thing#which comes off as creatives' stuff seeming to be ignored completely or otherwise very discouraging silence#when the only rule for tags/comments is to treat others the way you wish to be treated and apologize if you accidentally tread a toe#and being more worried about accidentally stepping on a theoretical persons toe than interested in showing actual people gratitude#like? pretty sure im not the only one side-eyeing that like ''have u really considered this feeling/logic????''#again: its not saying that anxiety isnt a dick or easy to dismiss but i am saying maybe challenge it or at least reflect on it#i just#blahh#the commenting thing is way more mild than the other but tags arent for that conversation and i need a much better brain space for that one
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