#jonathan: anyway i started hitting things

[doefated]

@glitchedxout

Their ears flickered lightly as the winter air chilled them to the boy. God, he REALLY wished that fight earlier had warmed them up, but the only thing he felt is the blood coating the snowy ground a shimmery purple. Jonathan's chest and face is cut up from being sliced at nails that would've gone deeper if Jonathan hadn't reacted. He's lucky these shadowy like beings were only a few and not a dozen or more if the timeline was REALLY infected.

Jonathan's eyes watered and stung in the air. Normally he had a good pain tolerance but this time? Not so much... although one thing is for certain, he's quite lucky to be alive. Jonathan sits down onto the ground in a heap, leaning their body against a bare tree. Closing their eyes, all they needed is a moment and a break from everything.

[countdown-til-sanders-take-over]

So hows it going 😀

TMAGP 7 is a WILD ride

[ssweetleaf]

doll parts.

summary: you agree to let dr crane experiment on you for ‘scientific purposes’.

jonathan crane x fem!reader

includes: SMUT 18+, based on this ask here <3, dub-con, clit play, fingering, overstimulation, kinda innocent!reader, doctor kink, jon being a condescending ass, unprotected p in v

˖ ࣪⭑

When you agreed to let Dr Crane experiment on you, you certainly hadn’t had anything remotely crude on your mind. A few tests, you thought, maybe he’d take your bloods— anything to help his scientific studies along and you agreed to be his little guinea pig for the day.

So, when he had you undress and get upon his silver operating table, it was quite the shock.

“Push your knees up to your chest,” he hummed, having you hold them in place while he analysed your pussy, “gotta make sure these tests are thorough, don’t wanna miss a thing.”

Jonathan ran a knuckle through your folds watching them flutter around his digit and coat it in your sweet slick, clit throbbing in anticipation just waiting for his touch.

“D-Dr Crane,” you stuttered out, finding it hard to keep your mewls choked down when he used a thumb and forefinger to spread you open, inspecting you even deeper. “I don’t think this is appropriate.”

You didn’t notice the flicker of a smirk that lifted his mouth before he pouted at you, mocking you, though you had no idea.

“But you said you’d let me experiment on you, sweetheart,” he cooed, using his other hand to pat at your thigh, attempting to somewhat calm your heavy breaths and wide eyes. “It’s for scientific purposes, you know that.”

You bit your lip, unsure.

“For science?” You repeated hopefully, staring at him with glistening eyes, eager to help the young scientist in any way, even if it did mean touching your most private parts.

“For science.” He nodded, “now be a good little patient and let the doctor carry on with his tests.”

Your cheeks burned, but you nodded anyway.

“O-of course, doctor.”

You resumed your position, chest already heaving from the tense atmosphere, peering down at his trailing hands when they squeezed at the fat of your thighs.

Jonathan’s thumb and forefinger parted your pussy lips, opening you up for him and exposing the pretty little pearl of your clit. With his other hand, he pressed his thumb to it, rubbing in figure eights, watching your facial expressions and how they changed with such simple touches, soft whines escaping the confines of your throat.

His eyes flitted back to your cunt, watching your arousal seep with each circle of his thumb, your hole clenching, desperate to be filled.

So he did just that and slipped a finger inside you, curling the digit upwards as it hit the base of his knuckle, and he smirked when you gasped at the sudden intrusion, your wetness just letting him slip right in, having him easily add another finger on his outward thrust.

“Oh, doctor,” you breathed, clenching hard around his fingers, the crude squelching causing your cheeks to burn.

“How do you feel, dear?” He asked, the tips of his fingers prodding at the spongy wall of your g-spot.

“F-feels good,” you managed to choke out, bashfully meeting his smug gaze. “I’ve never felt like this before.”

A virgin, he thought. Of course you were, pathetic little lamb— with the way you shivered from just his words alone he should’ve known. Hell, it made him harder, cock growing and forming a tent underneath his slacks, throbbing hotly and just begging to be released.

“I’m so glad to hear it, dear,” he cooed, reaching up to pat at your cheek with his palm, a little too hard, though you were sure he didn’t mean a thing by it.

With each passing moment, your belly started to tighten, growing warm and tingly, butterflies were flapping around and you felt like you needed to pee.

“Dr Crane, I feel strange,” you pouted, tears threatening to ebb over your waterline, it felt so good, but so unfamiliar.

“Just let go, darling,” he said, “this is what I was hoping for— my tests are going absolutely splendidly.”

Before you knew it, your orgasm rushed over you, your slick gushing along his fingers and down his wrist, your pussy clenching and spasming around his still prodding digits and you heaved out sobs. The feeling was so intense, so good, you hadn’t realised anything could feel as good as what Jonathan had made you feel.

“Say thank you, dear, it’s only polite.” He was smirking, though you somehow mistook it for a smile.

You nodded your head, staring at him with big, glassy eyes.

“Of course,” you breathed, “thank you, doctor.”

You had started to settle, your breathing and heartbeat evening out, until Jonathan’s thumb pressed to your clit once again, rolling and playing with the sensitive nub.

You whined out, you didn’t think you had it in you to go again. You grabbed onto his wrist, clawing at his skin and gasping into the stuffy air.

“In our agreement you said you’d take whatever I gave you, correct?” He spoke, an unoccupied hand grabbing at your cheeks, your lips jutting out into a pout.

You nodded, eyes wide like saucers and you shifted from all the fondling to your poor clit.

“Am I correct?” He repeated, much more stern that time, his jaw clenching and eyes narrowing from underneath his lenses.

“Y-yes, doctor.” You nodded.

“Well then,” he muttered, letting go of your face, directing his attention to your quivering cunt. “You’ll be a good girl and do just that.”

Quickly, another orgasm approached, simply by him playing with your abused little clit, urging you to cum for him and watch your hole quiver around nothing.

One after the other, over and over again, you came around his fingers and on his hand, your body heaving and jolting from the constant painful pleasure, he had to restrain you with a hand to your stomach, pinning you to the table and forcing you to ride out each orgasm.

Jonathan’s cock was painfully hard, and he reached down to palm at himself, smirking when he caught you staring, pussy fluttering at the sight.

“Now for my last experiment,” he pulled at his belt, tugging it from the loops and unzipping his fly, grasping at his cock, he pulled it from his briefs, pumping himself a few times, little beads of pearlescent pre-cum dripping from his tip.

You were babbling, completely inebriated from his touch— he was so long, and just the right amount of thickness, veins protruding along either side and underneath, his tip a pretty shade of red that had your mouth watering.

“Let’s see if you can take this, hm?” He mocked you, pouting down at your pathetic form, tears streaming down your cheeks, long lines of mascara staining your skin all the way down your neck. “M’sure you can— been so greedy for everything I’ve given you so far.”

He tapped his cock against your pussy, the wetness splashing up against your thighs, the obscene sounds of your sopping cunt had you blushing.

He pushed into you without a warning, to the hilt with no resistance, your creamy pussy letting him slip right inside, the mushroomed head of his pretty cock nudging at your spot so deep inside, even his fingers couldn’t reach.

Oh, you felt so full.

“Such a good little patient.” He groaned. “On second thoughts, I might need you to stay overnight— get a much more thorough examination.”

[feninina]

𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐝𝐨𝐭𝐞 ༉‧₊˚.⁀➷

therapist! jonathan crane x female reader.

𝘀𝘂𝗺𝗺𝗮𝗿𝘆: when your father decided that you needed therapy, taking you to his dear friend dr. crane to treat and help you, you thought it wouldn't work at all, but it turned out to be everything you needed.

𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀: SMUT(minors dni!!), noncon/dubcon, depression, cursing, crane is a mysoginistic prick, using therapy for unhinged reasons, smut, hair pulling, jonathan just being an creep, choking AND strangulation, dacryphilia, hitting, unprotected sex (safe sex its great sex!!), breeding kink, forced breeding, power dynamics, i think crane should be a warning himself, reader being borderline stupid and naive. also this has a lot of backstory i’m so sorry i got carried away lol.

𝘄𝗼𝗿𝗱 𝗰𝗼𝘂𝗻𝘁: 7.1K

𝗮𝘂𝘁𝗵𝗼𝗿’�� 𝗻𝗼𝘁𝗲: omg my first fic on here!! this is also my first work on english and my first smut ever so i apologise in advance for any mistake!! i hope y'all enjoy it anyways ahahahaha live laugh love jonathan crane👏🏻 feedback its very appreciated so i can improve and continue to publish better works, anyways enjoyyyy 💓

𝘀𝗺𝘂𝘁 𝘂𝗻𝗱𝗲𝗿 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗰𝘂𝘁

It was awkward, to say the least.

You were sitting across from Doctor Crane in the couch at your dad's house, legs crossed as you watched him write on his clipboard, something about it making you feel anxious, a little nauseous, even.

This wasn't your first session, you started doing this four months ago, not long after your divorce that caused you to fall into a spiral of sadness and misery. Your failed— and short marriage was the main reason you started taking therapy with your dad's friend, the chief of Arkham, Jonathan Crane, and still, you couldn't bring yourself to talk about it.

He was patient, you told him several times that he was a saint. Regardless, before you started with the sessions, he explained to your dad that he didn't really do this; therapy really wasn't his strong suit, but for a friend, a desperate one, he would gladly do it.

Your dad came to him, offering a big stack of money if he would talk to his little girl, make her recover her once joyful personality, like you had one to begin with. Jonathan really couldn't say no, and not really because of the money, he had other reasons in mind, unethical reasons.

And there you were now. You were quick to open up to him, eager to talk, to be listened and he, on the other hand, was ready to listen, to give you advice, console you and help you get through the sorrow that was following you since you were young, playing the role of your knight in shinning armor.

"I can't believe you don't actually do this" you said once, sniffling your nose with a handkerchief he gave you as he examined you with a warm gaze, an empathetic grin on his face. "You're really helping me"

Jonathan was quick to wave his hand and tell you that it wasn't a big deal, that he was just doing his job, and if you weren't so innocent, so stupid, you would have noticed the mischievous sparkle that flickered in his eyes for a split second.

You were landing right in the palm of his hand.

Not even thirty minutes into the first session you told him everything about your past; every little thing you thought he needed to know to treat you. And you were slightly right; he did need to know those things, but not to treat you, just to manipulate you and mold your little brain into what he was envisioning for you and your future together.

Truth was, you hated everything about your life, regardless of the fact that you had everything. That's what you've been told since you were a child; a big house, a lot of money, maids taking care of you so you wouldn't have to move a finger and just sit pretty and relax inside the walls of the huge mansion that confined you since you could recall.

You have everything. That was bullshit.

Sometimes, you couldn't help but think that people told you that out of pity, like they knew how miserable you felt, but not daring to say a word about it. Your dad was a powerful man, and you were aware of that, ever since you were born, he had bussines with Falcone and you knew that people feared him, he practically ruled Gotham, that lifeless and dangerous city that you had to live in.

You have everything. You were tired of that sentence. You didn't care at all about these nice things surrounding you, those dresses in your closet, those diamonds in your jeweler, that fancy car you owned since your eighteenth birthday, no, that was useless in your eyes, because all you really wanted, was love.

It was a lonely life; you learned how to do everything by yourself, how to comb your hair, how to deal with your period when it first came, how to dress up properly and do your makeup. You didn't even had to learn about boy problems because there weren't any boys in your life, you were homeschooled. So you were quiet, not really having to talk at all, there was nobody to talk to.

And since Jonathan was the only person you were talking to at the moment, you started to feel like you loved him, the idea sitting right with you without you even knowing it, thinking that this was how therapy normally went.

Loneliness striked your life at a young age; your mother died from a strange disease when you were eight, leaving you with a shattered heart thad bled everytime you walked past her bedroom, or saw a picture of her. You practically watched her die, a witness of how she lost her strength, how her once beautiful skin turned pale and yellow, and lost every little spark within herself, and the worst part was that all the money you had, couldn't even help her.

It was a deep wound that you carried with yourself, with nobody to talk about it.

Your father spent his days locked up in his office, and when he wasn't there, he was out in the city doing unthinkable things that you didn't even wanted to know about, leaving you on your own, having to fill all of those silent and empty rooms by yourself, with nobody to laugh with, nobody to hold you and see you grow. He wasn't really around, working all the time, too busy to know that his daughter didn't seem to care about all the expensive stuff he bought for her, not even taking the time to have dinner with you or hold a simple conversation. He loved you, you knew that, he just wasn't the type to show his affection with words or actions, but with gifts. And you hated everything about it.

But now, Jonathan was there, making you feel listened, finally saving you from falling into loneliness again. Your whole life, you thought you had a horrible sickness, that you were doomed to this awful destiny of sorrow and silence, but now, with his sweet words and good company, you couldn't be more than relieved.

You wished sometimes that you met him earlier, that this whole therapy stuff started before, and you even confessed it to him. And it irked him a little, that you didn't even remember how you two really met each other, hiding his annoyance with a warm smile.

Some months ago, your father started to brought you to parties he attended, parties were all the corrupts scumbags from Gotham reunited and celebrated how they were dragging the city to the gates of hell on their benefit, and you couldn't be more happy to attend them. You knew he was bringing you because he recently broke up with the young girl he carried with him— that was most likely your age, and needed a pretty thing to hang of his arm and take care of the people he didn't feel like talking to.

So you accepted this new life, eating up this role of socialite like it was made for you.

It was a chance to know people, to speak and make new friends, but you learned quickly that those people weren't there for that, and picked up on how mostly of the people who talked to you just wanted to climb up the social ladder and gain some extra points from your father.

He, even, introduced you to a couple of people that seemed close to your age, and you chatted with them, feeling extremely anxious because you weren't used to this, so it was weird to them seeing such a pretty woman, with your status and fortune, acting so shy and quiet in a place that your dad practically owned.

After a couple of hours, you learned the agenda. All you had to do was put on a fake smile, get them off your father's shoulders and pretend you were very interested in what they had to say, hiding your uncomfortable expression behind your glass of champagne, promising them that you would arrange a reunion with your father someday.

One of those nights, your father introduced you to someone, someone who you didn't pay much attention because he seemed to be uninterested too, only being there for the sake of his job.

"Pretty girl, come here" your father said, a cheerful tone of voice as grabbed you by the shoulder to get your attention, snapping you out of your train of thoughts. "I want you to meet my friend, Doctor Crane"

You looked at the man in front of your dad, his pale blue eyes already sizing you up discretely, looking at you up and down in a way that didn't go unnoticed by you, a shiver running down your spine as his eyes finally locked with yours.

You couldn't help but feel small under his gaze, your glass now forgotten in your left hand, the right one extended to take his and stretch it for a quick second, returning to your first position, his expression remaining serious.

"Nice to meet you" he spoke, his voice sounding like velvet in your eyes, not quite sensing the undertone behind it. "Your father told me wonders about you"

You grin, the irony of that sentence making you laugh a little, what wonders could your father know about you? But you kept your composure, the conversation not going any further, and you forgot about him fast enough, when in another of those annoying parties you met the love of your life — or so you thought.

That same night, when you went back home, you were thinking about spending the rest of your life with some guy that flirted with you at the bar, and Jonathan, prayed to whatever thing listening to him up there, that crossed your path with his again.

He practically obsessed with you, because it felt right. You were young, beautiful, wealthy and had a last name that could open even more doors for him, getting tired of saving Falcone's man of going to jail; you were an opportunity, tied to a nice pair of legs.

After a few weeks of stalking, it kinda broke his heart that naive as he expected you, you got married to the guy from the party; he told you then his name was Lewis, and now you doubted it that was even true.

You were finally going to get what you always wished for, a family, love. And it was perfect. Everything was perfect.

It was a dream that you were living in. A dream that shattered in front of you no longer than three months after.

After you contracted married with this man, you took care of the house, now learning all of these housewife duties that you didn't know anything about, but making your best effort to please him, to be the perfect woman ever created, departing from your old life and habits and adjusting them to his own.

You couldn't be more happy, regardless of your bad cooking, the bad-swiped floor and the half-done bed that welcomed you both every night, you finally had love.

It lasted three months. Your wholesome real life fantasy of a marriage destroyed when you found out, accidentally, that this man was just an employee of your dad, willing to get a promotion if he married you. At that moment, you didn't know who you hated more, if the bastard, or your dad who was literally bribing the bastard to love you.

But your dad only wanted to make you happy, tho.

You were embarrassed, not quite sure of how to tell this to Jonathan, because after all, he was there for you, just for the money your dad was paying him. Your cursed the day your dad became rich, because all of it was making you miserable and it felt like it wasn't going to stop.

At this point, a feeling of despite against you was growing within Jonathan, after a few weeks treating you, he quickly remembered why he didn’t chose this path of career, but remembering that he was there because of a major reason; a reason more important than your helpless cries for attention.

He was sick of you, all you ever did was complain in the commodity of your million dollar house, unaware that there were more important problems in the world. It isn’t completely your fault, Jonathan thought one day, you were just an ungrateful brat, and his work was to tame you, and he planned to do just that today.

"So," he startled you, narrowing his eyebrows, an expression in his face that you could only understand as concern. "remember, if you don't speak, I can't help you".

You chuckle and shift your weight in the chair, immediately feeling your eyes fill up with tears as you confronted the fact that you had to speak about it, right now. He was quick to offer you his handkerchief, as he always did and with shaky hands you took it, sniffling onto it, closing your eyes as you felt your whole body shake with each one of your cries.

You felt Jonathan put his hand on your knee, softy caressing the skin that his thumb could reach, opening your eyes and looking at his, Jonathan welcoming you with a pitying look. You put the tissue aside, both him being so close and his scent impregnated on the piece of fabric making you feel a little giddy, a little confused.

Why was your heart racing so much? He was your therapist, here to talk about your former husband.

Jonathan couldn't help but grin a little, knowing he was maybe breaking a rule here, touching you like this, being so close. He couldn't care less, after all, he wasn't here listening to you cry and bitch about your whole life for the sake of your well-being. He was here because he wanted you to break and get on your knees to him. Figuratively and literally.

"It's so embarrassing" you struggled to spit out "He didn't even love me, Doctor"

He hummed, dragging his chair so he was a little closer to you, you looked at him through your teary lashes and tried to keep it together, this wasn't the first time you cried in front of him, but the reason itself was enough to make you feel full of shame.

He didn't say anything, this being a motivation for you to continue.

"My dad was paying him" you murmured, cleaning the mascara off your cheeks. "It was all a lie"

The whole situation was absurd, what happened to you still felt like a sick joke they were playing on you, your dad and Lewis, probably waiting for the perfect moment to tell you the truth.

But that wasn't going to happen, right now the only thing that felt true to you was Jonathan. He set you up to that, and you blindly fell on his silly trap.

"Poor thing" he cooed you, moving his hand a little further up your thigh, noticing the goosebumps on your skin. A mastermind, that's how he felt. "How could they?"

That was all the mendacity he fed you with since you started seeing him, making you believe he was actually empathizing with you, full of loathe against everyone who hurt you, who dared to leave you alone, but now he was there, his task being to pretend to care.

"It's pathetic" you blurted out, leaning into his touch when his prying hand went up to your cheek. You really couldn't say anything more, crying against his hand like it was something you did every monday morning. "I'm so sad. I don't know what to do"

He shook his face, your eyes meeting his with a confused expression, black stained tears dropping on your lap and wetting his hand before he returned it and looked over his clipboard, pretending to think.

You were so vulnerable, ready for him to destroy. He finally got you where he wanted. He then explained you that you were so sad that it made you unaware of a lot of things, blinded by your own pity against yourself that every door that opened, you closed. It all came down to a thing; you needed a diagnosis.

He gave you a moment to process the information, ready to continue with his plan.

"Actually," he started, his tone now more firm, more strict, the one he used when you were approaching the end of the session. On the last one, he recommended you to touch yourself, to liberate oxytocin on your brain or something you really didn't understood.

It was almost evil from his side, he knew that your only thought while doing it would he him ordering you to do so.

"I'm sorry to be the bearer of such awful news, Y/N" he stated, making your heart skip a beat. "But I think you're sick"

You nearly gasped, the air got stuck in your throat, more tears gathering in your eyes. You lifted one of your hands to your chest, a million thoughts crossing your head as Jonathan's clever eyes examined your expression.

Bingo.

"Sick" you repeated after a moment, almost like you were making peace with the revelation. "How sick?"

It was an innocent question, your tone of voice shaking as your inferior lip trembled, holding it with your teeth in an attempt to not burst into tears again, your whole body feeling like it was going to break into a million peaces by how much you were shaking in the couch.

Jonathan was quick, standing from the chair he was on and taking a seat by your side, his hand swiftly placing in your knee. You looked at him confused, he never got this close, maybe your sickness was serious.

"What am I, Doctor?" you whispered, your eyes showing him a hint of fear that made him finally lose all his faked professionalism. "Depressed? Crazy?"

Both of you were dying of anticipation now; meanwhile you feared that you were going to get admitted to Arkham, Jonathan was seeing the golden ticket to the best future he could ever achieve, and all thanks to you.

"Oh, no, no" he purred, his hand making its way up to your thigh. "You're sick, not crazy"

You parted your lips as his hand moved more further, not really sure of what was happening, not daring to stop him, too scared of your mental health to think about anything else, not helping the way your legs started to part too.

A sudden gasp left your lips as his hand squeezed your tight, a smile you never saw on him appearing on his face. The crying stopped a moment ago, the surprise of having him so close making you go a little numb.

"I know what a girl like you needs" he said, almost sternly, like his hand wasn't centimeters away from your panties.

Was in that moment, that you knew this wasn’t about therapy anymore.

"You think so?" you whispered, your voice still shaky, but now for a whole different reason. "And what is it, Doctor?"

"To be fucked stupid"

It almost shocked you how he said that as it was a normal diagnosis, like he gave you a name of a medicine you could go and buy at any drugstore in town. You gulped and didn't move when his grip tightened on your leg, your face growing red.

A loud gasp escaped your lips when at your lack of response, Jonathan grabbed you hard by the jaw and forced you to look at him. Your eyes glistened with nothing but fear, your brows narrowing as you mumbled something that he really couldn't understand, and it wasn't like he wanted to.

"You're sick, Y/N" he repeated, more harshly this time, his hand moving your head as he spoke. "And I'm going to cure you"

He let go of your face to clasp his lips against yours, a kiss very far away from sweet, his mouth moving roughly against yours. You never had been kissed like this, so you tried to play it along, trying to show him some of the love you felt for him, that you thought you owed him.

But he didn't care if you felt loved during the kiss, trying to assert the dominance he held upon you, his hand now holding firmly the back of you neck to prevent you from pulling away.

It was a mess; your teeth clashed, drool was dripping from your chin as his tongue explored every space of your mouth, not leaving anywhere of it untouched. Your movements were a little stiff, unsure of what to do, trying to provide the sweetness that he lacked.

His hand moved to your the front of your neck and squeezed it a little, making you yelp in surprise, the sound muffled by his mouth. You tried to get away from the kiss, confused about his rough actions against you, a little scared of him even, almost like you didn’t trust him every little part of your brain in this same couch for the last couple of months.

But then it clicked on your foggy brain, he knew you, perfectly— you only knew his name, you didn’t know what this man was capable of.

You could only move a few centimeters away from his hungry mouth, your lips parted as tears welled in your eyes from the pressure he was applying to your neck.

“Stop” you managed to stutter, your breath mixing with his. “I can’t- breathe”

You doubted that he listened to you, your voice not coming out of your throat at all and getting stuck in your larynx, your voice-box completely muffled by his strong grip.

“Shut up, brat” he spitted, his tone sounding full of abhor, your eyes wide open as you felt the air leaving your body and your lungs starting to burn. “Always getting what you want”

You weakly placed one of your hands around his wrist, another attempt of gasp elicited from your agape mouth as he lifted his other hand and choked you with both, something in your dizzy mind telling you that he was possessed.

“Crying all the time- complaining” he continued, not caring if you were listening, the suffocation being to much to bare now. “So selfish”

And maybe he was.

Your brain was filled with fear, wondering how it all went from a kiss to this— almost getting killed by your therapist in your couch. You opened your eyes to meet his, feeling like your chest was on fire as there wasn’t any air flowing in, seeing how the blue of Jonathan’s eyes has darkened and his lips were parted as well, the muscles of his jaw twitching as he choked you to death.

Your eyebrows narrowed together in terror as you noticed that familiar tingly sensation in your lower belly and your thighs clenching together. Maybe it was something about him exercising this power over you, how you felt so feeble under his touch, that was probably leaving bruises on your neck for you to carry and show around what he was making you do it.

You didn’t have enough time to think about it, you were practically dying.

“And you are enjoying this?” he said with an amused tone, probably noticing how your thighs fragily contracted against one another.

You felt yourself slowly lose your consciousness when finally the relief came and the air started to flow again to your desperate lungs, taking long and loud puffs of air when his hand let go of your neck. Your erratic breath was interrupted by a loud moan that escaped you when Crane yanked you by your hair and shoved you to the floor.

He was quick yo position you between his legs, looking at you through his unfixed glasses, giving you a twisted smile that made you quiver in fear, that growing wet patch on your panties making you feel like a really sick girl.

“Doctor-” you mumbled, closing your eyes as he pulled your hair, withdrawing a mewl off your mouth. “Hurts”

“You talk when I tell you to talk” he snickered, adjusting the way his fingers gripped your hair. You thought that he might just pull out the strand he was tugging. “I’m sick of your whining”

You felt more tears well up in your eyes; not sure if it was from the pain in your head or how his words felt like a knife that landed right on your heart. You were confused, sad, angry— a little hot, too.

“I pay you yo listen to me” you said, your voice so shaky you were lucky he could understand you. You wished he didn’t understand you.

Another sort of moan left your lips as a hard slap made a landing in your cheek, your face turned to the side because of the impact. You closed your eyes in disbelief, a cry coming out as you felt helpless, wondering if this was some exposure therapy he was experimenting on you.

He repeated himself, instructing you to talk only when you were told so, nodding in defeat as you accepted whatever this was and continued to play along with Jonathan’s sick fantasy of controlling you, without even knowing it.

You looked at him with nothing but inquietude, the look in his eyes giving you the foreboding that nothing good was about to happen now, frightened of what we would do to you.

He didn’t show any hints of letting go of your hair anytime soon, just holding it firmly to keep you looking at him through your heavy lashes, a wicked grin on his smug face.

“Let’s give that whining mouth of yours a good use” he said, and you gulped, understanding what he wanted and quivering in fear, not really understanding why the sticky sensation between your legs grew.

“Undo my pants” he commanded, and you stayed still, your eyes not leaving his even when another slap landed on your tear-wet face. “Do as you’re told, brat. This might be your only cure”

You couldn’t help but sob a little, his tone sounding so definitive, so professional. Your trembling hands reached his belt and unbuckling it ungracefully, taking longer than he expected, you heard him chuckle as you unbuttoned his pants afterwards, then putting your hands back in front of your lap.

“C’mon” he pulled your hair again, causing you to moan in pain. “Don’t make me tell you what to do”

You looked at him again in nothing but shame, trying to resist to this humiliating request of his, but complying it anyways. He said he was going to cure you, but now you doubted it, right now, you only wanted this to be over.

With a last look at his eyes you returned your attention to the growing bulge in his slacks, the shame in your brain being present at all times, not quite helping the way your eyes were fixated on his clothed member. You were quick to free him out after your staring earned you a other harsh pull of hair, your lips turned into a line when his cock slapped his abdomen, causing his dress shirt to wrinkle a little.

“Go on, Y/N” he encouraged you, as you looked at him with pleading eyes, silently begging him for mercy, knowing that even if you screamed it at him, he just wouldn’t listen. “This isn’t about what you want, anymore. Is about what you need”

A tear slid from your eyes and disappeared down your cheek when his free hand placed the tip of his hard cock on your parted lips, gesturing you to take it and not waste more of his time— more than you already did.

“Open up, whore” he said under his breath, using your hair as a device to move your head and help you shove his length down your throat. You complied, the tears in your eyes now soaking in you cheeks by the effort that you were making trying to welcome his thick shaft down your mouth.

You were sure you scratched him with your teeth a few times as he bobbed your head up and down with his strong hand, manhandling you without care for his own pleasure. You placed your hands on his knees, trying not to gag, but when his tip touched the bottom of your throat, you couldn’t help it.

You cried as you felt suffocated again, now for a whole different reason, a more humiliating one, and you almost wished he killed you then. His hips buckled everytime your lips reached the base of his cock, the room filled with the sounds of your mouth and saliva coating his shaft and the soft moans that came out of his poisoned lips.

“Take it, whore” he said, his voice now husky and distorted by the pleasure, the pain that your teeth accidentally inflicted on him turning him even more. “God- you are horrible at this”

He chuckled between heavy breaths, pulling you by the hair and releasing his cock from your mouth, a vulgar pop filling both of your ears at the sudden separation of your lips and his member. Your eyes looked at the floor, feeling such a shame that the mere thought of meeting his face with your fearful face made you cringe, the pulsating pain on the back of your head making you dizzy.

“You can’t suck dick properly” he said, his tone sounding like he was making fun of you. “No wonder why your husband left you. You’re just pathetic”

You finally rose up your face to look at that insufferable smile of his, ignoring the way his cock was still hanging there in front of you, almost brushing your nose. His fingers finally untangled from your hair and giving you some sort of solace, the consolation that this traumatic session was over.

Maybe the remedy was worse than the sickness itself.

“Jonathan, stop it, plea-”

Your imploration was completely ignored, followed by another slap on your wet cheek that made you cry even more, not understanding how this man could’ve been the same one who made you felt loved and finally listened. You fell for a lie once again.

“Get on the couch” he simply said, his words were like a bucket of cold water fell on you. “Stop the bitching, don’t want to hear it”

“And I’m your doctor. Not Jonathan” he reminded you, making you feel even more ashamed.

You did as he told, again, half-standing from the floor and sitting next to him, trying to take as much space from him as you could before he grabbed you by the waist and pulled you closer, your face growing red as his face was now centimeters away from yours.

“You look so beautiful when you cry” he whispered, caressing your face but trying to nor wipe the tears away, almost like he was admiring you. It made you melt into his touch, glad that his kind demeanor was there again. Even if his words made you cringe— and the fact that his cock was still out, you felt your heart grew warmer by the way he tenderly touched you.

It didn’t last much longer, when his lips twitched into a malicious smile and went down to nibble your neck, leaving a trail of wet kisses around the bruised skin and bitting where his fingers hurt you previously, making your fingers wrap on his hair and cry for mercy, trying for him to stop hurting you this much.

“Shut up, stupid brat” he repeated that same insult, making you swallow your cries, closing your eyes in disbelief as he continued to injure your already suffering skin.

You arched your back in surprise when all of the sudden his hands reached for your breasts, groping your tits like his life depending on it, stimulating you through the fabric of your shirt, but all you felt was fear and anger, impotence flowing through your veins because you just couldn’t scream and push him away, fear was freezing you on the spot.

The worst part? You maybe didn’t wanted to push him away. Because maybe if he gets what he wants now you would be cured and he’ll be back to normal, returning you the sweet Doctor Crane that you met once, not this monster that was groping you like a piece of meat.

He clicked his tongue and dropped both of his hands to spread your legs open, forcing your back to drop onto the hand rester of the couch. You looked at him with big eyes, your heart felt like it was going to jump out of your chest and scream to Jonathan that enough was enough, you just couldn’t take any of this anymore.

But your heart stayed there, between your lungs that seemed incapable to hold any air, making your breathing erratic. So nobody screamed Jonathan to stop, and he continued with his profanation against your persona— your dignity.

He bit his lip at the sight of your fucked-up face, your legs open as it showed him the dark patch on your baby blue panties, darting his eyes from your half-exposed crotch to your teary eyes.

“God, keep crying and I might come now” he growled, lowering his face to meet your pussy, kissing it through your underwear, making you mewl, closing your eyes at the sudden attention your core was getting.

You felt embarrassed at how much you enjoyed when he moved the fabric to the side and started making out with your cunt, swallowing your fluids like a starved man.

“So wet” he mumbled against your labia, the vibration making your eyes roll back, bitting your lip to prevent any moan to come out; he was raping you, why did he make you enjoy it? “I bet you like this, to be treated like a whore”

You shook your head, more tears falling out of your eyes as you felt nothing else but humiliation, pleasure washing over your body everytime his tongue brushed your clit, your back arched against nothing.

“You like it?” he said, finally pulling out and pushing his body up so his face was in front of yours, his cock grazing against your now stimulated pussy, a gasp leaving your lips, a gasp that quickly turned into a hurting moan when his hand slapped you again, this time in your throbbing cunt. “Answer me”

“I- I do” you whispered, gripping his shoulders when you felt him align the head of his member with your whole, scared of how it was going to fit. You had trouble taking it when he face-fucked you, how the fuck it was going to fit down there?

“I’m going to fuck you so good” he whispered between pants, jerking himself off before entering you. “You’re going to forget that pathetic husband of yours”

You couldn’t help but cry, trying to push him off by the shoulders, a terrified look on your face. “It won’t fit, Doctor” you pleaded, a crooked grin on his face as you keep on calling him that. “I beg you, don’t-”

“Yes, beg me” he said, starting to push his member inside you with a slow but relentlessly pace, not giving you enough time to adjust, just to scream and hit him weakly on the chest, face and shoulders before ge grabbed your hands and pinned them down, on the sides of your body. “I’m going to cure you- do you so good”

His voice was low, as he barely could speak when he felt just how tight you were, your walls hugging his cock just the right way, his pulsating head making your mind dizzy, the stinging pain starting to be forgotten.

But when he slid out and entered back it, the hardness of his movement made your insides burn with pain, a loud cry echoing in the walls of the living room as he started to trust into your pussy with a fast pace, not caring at all if you felt good.

He snapped his hips against yours with an animalistic force, growls escaped from his mouth every time his cock was welcomed by the warmth of your stretch whole, the sensation making him go even more feral, making you cry more.

He let go of one of your hands and grabbed your jaw, forcing you to look at his eyes as he fucked you vigorously, the blue on his iris not existent anymore, only his widely dilated pupils meeting yours, your blurred vision distinguishing the depraved expression in his face.

“You- so tight” he snarled, his voice barely audible, covered by the sound of skin slapping and your loud cries. “I bet your stupid husband didn’t fuck you like this”

You felt nothing but shame as you felt his cock now sliding in and out more easily, the wetness of your cunt growing as he spoke to you like that, that familiar heat flourishing in your lower belly as his words degraded you, your cries quickly becoming moans.

“This was all you needed- fuck” he said, his spit splashing your face as he talked, his words full of disdain. “A good dick, that’s all it takes to keep bitches like you quiet” You nodded, thinking that if you agreed he would stop. How wrong you were.

In a quick movement Jonathan took his cock out and spun you around, not giving you time to get on your ass up by laying your chest down before he stabbed your hole again, pushing your skirt all the way up to see how his pelvis came into collision with your ass.

You were moaning like a bitch in heat now, sure that the maids were listening, not really caring about it anymore. Jonathan was fucking you nice and hard, your mouth wide open as his tip brushed your cervix, screaming to him to keep it right there.

“I’m close” he said, pulling your hair back to press his chest to your back, his other hand going down to play with your swollen clit, wanting your to come around his cock like the slut he knew you were. “Come with me, you whore”

“Yes” you moaned, your tongue out as his cock hit the right spots, making your hips to move against his, grinding against his hand and dick, feeling your wetness drip down to your thighs. “Yes, yes, I want to”

He laughed, approaching your ear with his tongue to bite it, leaving a long and wet kiss underneath it that made you grow hotter, your eyes closed as you let him use you; the only thought in your mind being him and his wonder-working cock.

Truth was, he was fucking you stiffly, every slam of his hips stronger than the last one, but you were so deprived of touch, so dick-starved, that even if Jonathan was fucking you like a lifeless doll, only for the sake of his pleasure, you loved it, even when it hurt you.

“I’m going to fill you up” he said against your ear, his hand leaving your clit unattended as he grabbed your hip to increase the velocity of his thrusts, ramming your hole like a demented man, making your head drop against his shoulder and scream at the ceiling, now knowing what he meant by curing you.

“Going to get you pregnant” he said, more to himself than anything “so you don’t have to bitch about being alone anymore”

You opened your eyes with terror, you didn’t want children, you were so young. The idea made you frightened, the moaning now sounding like little nos and pull outs, but Jonathan didn’t listen.

“Doctor please, please, pull out” you pleaded, reaching for his hips and trying to push him away, one of his hands slapping your ass and pulling you down by your shoulder blade so you wouldn’t fight anymore. “Doctor Crane please”

“I will fucking fill you up, Y/N” he chanted, laughing at the idea of your round belly and your swollen tits, carrying his baby all day and feeling all worked up and needy all day, only waiting for him to fuck you all day. “You won’t be alone again. You won’t be sad again”

Then you realized it.

When he came, your hot walls creamed every single drop of his cum, making his thrusts sloppy and slow, his moans filling your ears as you sobbed under his touch, feeling his seed paint your walls and load your insides with his sperm.

That was your cure.

His hot release that now flooded inside your leaking cunt, that was your so-promised antidote. He took away your solitude by giving you his and yours firstborn, a bastard baby that would give you the company that you lacked.

You felt him chuckle as he rode out his high, the chase of his own climax made you forget yours, so now there you were, your swollen cunt looking for its release while his rested among your insides calmly, like it was meant to be.

He didn’t pull out immediately, taking his time to appreciate the sight of your skirt resting in your hips all rolled up, your bruised neck and messy hair, the way your ass was exposed to him by the way he had you arching your back. All for him— for him to wreck.

He pulled out and rolled his eyes when you started crying, now being annoying instead of hot. You sat on the couch and saw him button his pants and fix his hair, hissing when you felt nothing but pain growing in your worn-out pussy. You explained through your weak voice how he ruined your life, that he was the worst person you’ve ever met and that now you had to carry the product of his sick and twisted rapist-fantasy, even tried to hit him, but your pathetic tantrum only gained you another slap in the face, and a stern look.

When he tried to stand up and leave, you grabbed him by the wrist and begged him not to, he couldn’t just leave you, not now, not ever.

“Don’t be so ungrateful” he said, a smile that made you feel nothing but trepidation in his face. “You’ll never be alone again”

You couldn’t help but feel scared. Scared of him, of what just happened, of what’s going to happen next, scared for your future son with this evil specie of a man.

When you continued to cry, and he pulled you for a hug as he assured you that he would never leave you; and how could he? He had a long life of success waiting for him now, giving a girl of your status his last name, his children. Oh, it’s going to be wonderful, he just needed to tame you and make you the perfect slave for him, and that wasn’t going to be hard.

You were sure that you’ll never be loved, but at least now Jonathan was going to be with you. You’ll never be alone again.

thanks for reading. w/love, fenina;)

taglist: @lovesickxcherries @genini @ilunapb @ostricx @devotedlyshadowytheorist

if you want to be added let me know, it’ll be my pleasure🫶🏻

[hellfire--cult]

Edit of Eddie: pitifulbaby

Chapters: Masterlist (Go here to see list of chapters, plotline and general warnings.)

Pairing: Eddie Munson x Fem!Reader

Tropes: Enemies to Lovers, Non-Traditional Omegaverse, Slow burn, Modern!AU, Mechanic!Eddie

⚠️18+: lots of angst, mentions of pregnancy (not reader), evil person appearing, reader having a crisis, some violence, eddie being a sweetheart, hurt/comfort

wc: 9.9k

A/N: i didn't take a month to update, wow. hope you all like this chapter because here is where everything starts turning a lil more serious. thank you @andvys for always proofreading for me ���

Anyways, Enjoy! ❤️ And don't forget to always support me by hitting the reblog button or leave a comment!

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CHAPTER 21

Tap. Tap. Tap.

You tapped that pen on the desk as you held onto your forehead. A headache was forming as you started thinking of how to cope with the next interviews you will have with this woman. A successful woman who had many clothing brands to her name. One who wanted many pages with her clothes on display by various models. A woman.

A pregnant woman.

You weren’t resentful. You weren’t angry or jealous… You just know if things would have gone different, you would have a child in your arms by now. You would be showing that baby off like your pride and joy. Looking at a pregnant woman was like looking at the one thing you never reached, the one dream that was so close to being completed only for it to be ripped apart. Ripped from your grasp by two evil beings.

That was the unfair part. If it were your fault, if it were something that had happened to you, then you would have no one to blame but yourself. That was the part you were still resentful of. The part you hated to dwell on. The part you didn’t want to remember. You often wondered if you could even hold a baby. Would your heart let you? Would it allow you to feel the warmth of someone else’s baby after what you went through? 

You sighed as you fixed the papers on your desk, looking at the name of the woman. She was kind, she seemed happy and radiant, holding her pregnant belly as she discussed business with you and Liana. You saw how she used her left hand that held a beautiful wedding ring on her ring finger, and she rubbed it all over her belly, laughing when she got distracted when her baby kicked.

You wanted to feel it, yet you didn’t. You wanted to know how it felt, how it all could be… but you also didn’t want to be reminded of what you didn’t get to have, and maybe, ever have. At this rate, is there someone out there that won’t fuck you over? Someone you are willing to trust? 

And he popped in your head.

As soon as he did, you shook your head, brushing him off. He wasn’t a good idea. You know about his record of women, you know who he is and what he does. You would not be surprised if you came to find out he is fucking someone else apart from you right now. You wouldn’t be surprised. He can do whatever he wants, can’t he? Just like you do. You two are unattached. As it should be.

This was just beneficial for the two of you. You were friends who had a great time together in and out of bed, and that was it. You are happy that that is it. Don’t you? Yeah, you are. You are not looking for a relationship, much less with Eddie Munson. From what you know, he has never been in a serious relationship. He’s never had a girlfriend before, and you asked around. You asked Steve, Jonathan, Nancy… they all gave you the same answer: Eddie does not do relationships.

Your pen dropped from your hand, a gulp sounding in the room. You were blinking a few times as you breathed again and grabbed the pen once more. 

But you couldn’t help but imagine it. You wanted to invite him to stay over often and not just leave in the morning. You want him to eat breakfast with you, or lunch, whatever. It was as if whenever you got together first with your friends, you used that time to be together like friends and just that. Enjoy a movie together, some drinks, a dinner, but then everyone leaves and you are on each other like animals in heat season.

You wondered if he ever wanted to spend a night with you alone, but… watching a movie. Or having some pizza together with some beers and play games… or– wait, you are thinking about a date. You are thinking of going on a date with Eddie. But is it? You two are like that when not fucking eachother’s brains out, so what’s wrong with spending time with him as a friend and just a friend? It isn’t weird.

You should offer it, but what if Eddie actually thinks you are asking him on a date? Or what if he thinks that because you want to do something friendly with him, you are putting an end to it all? Why are you overthinking this? You didn’t before, and you should stop. He is not racking his brains over this like you are, so you shouldn’t.

“Knock knock.” You raised your head to see Robin knocking on your open door, a small smile on her lips. You knew why she was here, so you let her in, putting the pen down on the papers on your desk. She walked in, leaving the door open, tilting her head towards you. “You okay?” “Yeah… Yeah, I am Robs.” You sighed and one thing is to pass by a lovely couple where the woman is pregnant and not see them again, and the other is this. Meeting this woman several times and knowing that at one point you will find her sitting on that chair with her baby in her arms instead of inside her belly. 

“Okay… Liana is calling for everyone in the cafeteria. She wants to tell us something important.” You frowned at that, wondering what it could all be, because Liana always made sure you were one of the few to know first about things or deals happening to the company. 

“What?” Robin shrugged at your question and continued.

“She was smiling, so I am not assuming the worst, you know…” Okay, that calms you down slightly. You nod and get up from your desk, smiling at Robin as she smirks and points at your neck. “Things are turning serious?”

“What?” You covered your neck with your hand, cursing at Eddie in your mind. After he dropped Argyle off from a night at Jonathan’s bar, he drove you to his house, and there wasn’t any sex, just him with a sudden hunger to eat you out, and make you see stars consecutively. 

That was a new development. Eddie was very into making you cum. He told you he would make you cum at least twice whenever you two stayed together, and he sure is taking that promise seriously. You weren’t complaining, but he made you feel… wanted. And you didn’t want to feel like that… You didn’t want to feel… hopeful.

“When can I properly meet Jeff? Like, as your best friend, so I can do that whole ‘Hurt her and I murder you’ speech.” Robin said with a smile and you felt guilty. So, so guilty. How do you tell her this is not serious? How do you even begin to explain to her that this is not what it looks like at all? 

How do you even tell her it’s not Jeff, but Eddie you’re seeing?

“Never because this is not serious and never will be.” The words stung in your tongue and you tried brushing it away with a roll of your shoulders, in which Robin caught on. Your hands fumbled in your purse to get the concealer out so you could reapply it on the hickey and some powder to conceal it. 

“You look upset about that.” Her words made you look up as you popped the concealer open and walked towards the mirror in your office. 

“Upset? Why would I be upset?” You asked, your heart racing slightly at your own question but Robin stood next to you, crossing her arms over her chest as you applied two dots of concealer on the skin of your neck.

“Because whenever you roll your shoulders, crack your neck, or don’t even look at me, it means something is not going as you planned.” You gulped a lump that was suddenly bothering you in your throat as you stared at Robin through the mirror. You weren’t upset. Why would you be? Why would you be upset at all about how things are going? You aren’t. 

“You’re wrong. I’m perfectly fine with what I have now, and, I– I am still talking to other people.”

“Bullshit! Jeff is the only one you’ve been seeing for a month now or more and you confessed to me that no one fucks you like–”

“Yeah, yeah, got it! I know what I said but– We aren’t exclusive even! So– Who knows? Maybe he is out there, fucking someone else right now!” You froze for a second at your words. Could that be happening? Could that be something that Eddie was doing? You two don’t really talk about being with other people, nor have you had any indication of him sleeping with someone else but, he is in all his right. He can do whatever he wants, just like you can. You just decide not to because you’re afraid of being disappointed and embarrassed for the other person for not performing like Eddie does.

That was all. 

“Well then, make it exclusive!” Robin’s voice was loud, which made you shush her with a movement of the concealer wand as you put it back in the container. You passed the tube to her and opened the powder to set it on your neck. 

“I won’t because we don’t want that.” You could feel the pulse in your neck becoming quicker the longer you held this conversation.

“How do you know he doesn’t want that?” Robin’s voice was slowly starting to annoy you as you walked back to your desk, ripping the concealer out of her hands to put it back in your purse. 

“We talked about it already, and we just want to keep having sex. That is all there is.” You straightened up, fixing your blazer and turning to look at her. “So?”

Robin looked you up and down and did an ok sign with her fingers, “Unnoticeable.”

“Perfect. Do you have any idea what she wants?” You asked as you walked out of your office, Robin closing the door behind her as you two went to the elevator.

“I have no idea. She wants everyone to be in the cafeteria for an announcement. I don’t know what could possibly be.” Robin replied as you two got into the elevator and pressed for the second floor, the door closing in front of you. “She’s not retiring, isn’t she?”

“Oh my god, Robin, Liana is only forty-one.” To your answer, Robin shrugged. Once the doors opened, you all walked out and moved to the cafeteria where many people were already waiting and talking to eachother, speculating into what the news could be. You wondered if any of the rumors that were happening were true. 

Some speculated she was resigning. Some speculated the company was going to close down. Some were saying she was just going to give out the announcement for a better salary. You did not have a single clue what was happening, except for the fact Liana seemed happier, and she was being less strict with everything around her. Fuck, maybe she was resigning.

You stood next to Robin who was already grabbing a muffin from the counter, but your nerves didn’t let you sit still. You couldn’t even think of eating something right now, afraid that it would get caught in your throat. You had a feeling something you weren’t going to like was going to happen, but maybe it was just your nerves and the client situation throwing you off… and the talk you just had with Robin.

Liana walked in, smiling as she greeted a few, coming over to stand in the middle of the cafeteria. Everyone greeted her like the superstar she was, a renamed magazine director. A magazine that despite the technological changes, it’s up and running, changing it from the public view, to only be a magazine, a catalogue, for clothing brands. 

“Okay, hello!” Liana greeted you all, and you fidgeted in your place as she looked all over the employees, or well, most of them, which weren’t a lot. Just thirty people in the building right now. “So, I bet you are all not figuring out why I called you here.”

“No idea Liana, so please, spare us from the anxiety.” A male coworker laughed, which prompted everyone to let out a chuckle, as well as Liana.

“Sure, it’s going to be quick. For the next month… I will be looking for a temporary replacement.” Your eyes widened as you turned to look at Robin, who was wide-eyed just as you were.

“Temporary?” Someone asked and your eyes looked back at Liana, and you just felt a shiver run down your spine. Something was telling you to get out of there. Something was telling you to simply run away. Something was telling you that you shouldn’t listen to this.

“Yes… I have been hiding something from all of you. My personal life is something I wanted to keep apart from my work as much as I could, but these new decisions require me to be open about it now.” You felt your blood going cold. Your hands were tense. Your tongue was dry.

“Don’t tell me…” Robin’s whisper was far away as you only focused on Liana, who was smiling widely, her hands opening her blazer, and there happened to be a belly. A swollen belly. A pregnant belly.

“I’m going on maternity leave. I’m six months pregnant.”

If there was any clapping, any cheering, any kind of reaction to that, you were numb to it. You were deaf to whatever was happening. Everything moved in slow motion for you right now, and you were trying to process what she had just said. You were trying to make it make sense but it just didn’t. How? When?

She is pregnant. Your boss is fucking pregnant. Everyone is getting pregnant.

You want to leave. You want to run away but you can’t. Just because it didn’t happen for you, it doesn’t mean people can’t live that. Just because you couldn’t make it happen doesn’t mean others cannot. You had to be rational about it. You had to be a grown up and you have moved on from this. You did.

So why do you feel like throwing up? Why do you feel like the world is crumbling on top of your head? Why do you feel like you won’t reach anything you ever want? Why are you so envious? Why?

“Baby, snap out, please.” Robin’s words made you blink, looking at her through lost eyes. Her eyebrows were met in the middle in a worried frown. Pity. You could see the pity and you didn’t want to see it, or feel it. 

“I’m fine. I’m alright, just shocked, I didn’t even… know she had a partner.” You tried to play it cool as shock and not utter disappointment in your life. You were trying to play it off as if it wasn’t one of the worst things you heard in the past week.

“It’s… okay to feel sad– You just had a client–”

“My two doves!” Liana’s voice broke you from your conversation with Robin, making you look at her with words being stuck in your throat. You didn’t want to face her but you had to. You were being childish. You need to make your heart stop turning a bit in your chest cavity and tell your stomach to stop flipping upside down.

“Hi Liana…” Robin was side-eyeing you as you kept looking at your boss, your breaths quite heavy. “I’m– Congratulations! I didn’t know you had a partner!”

“Oh, yes! I do, it was kind of… an on and off thing until we decided to make it work and well… take the next step for me before it was too late and all!” Your boss said with a smile and– The baby was going to be born in something that was broken? Your throat was dry, not even gulping down saliva helped. Liana turned to look at you, “I’m sorry for not telling you. Especially you.”

You didn’t know what to say. You had to say something. This was like a praise coming from her because it meant you were one of her favorites. You cleared your throat, and you were hoping you were mustering a smile, because you couldn’t exactly feel your face right now.

“I’m not mad, Li. I’m just… very surprised…” You said and she smiled, holding her hand out. You frowned a bit, putting your hand on hers and– No. Please, no. She directed your hand to her belly, so you could press your palm against it and you felt the entire world caving in for you. It was soft. It was so soft and there was a baby in there.

“Still, sorry… But! Can you feel him? A strong baby boy is growing in there!” She was smiling, excited, and she was so happy to make you be the one to touch her belly, something private, something intimate. And all you felt was anger. Sadness. Jealousy. Resentment. 

You forced another of your smiles but the moment you felt her belly bump slightly, signaling the baby inside was moving, the bad thoughts were gone momentarily. Someone so pure, so innocent and beautiful. A baby boy. Your eyes went towards Liana who was smiling expectantly at you, making you tilt your head in question.

“What is it?”

“You’re my first choice.” She whispered and Robin’s eyes widened as you retreated your hand back in shock. 

“Sorry?”

“My replacement. I think it will give you… amazing training. I will be looking at others just in case you decide to not take it but… It will give you a pay raise and it stays that way even when I return from my leave… and then… when I retire…” 

Was Liana telling you she wanted to make you her successor? She wanted to train you to be the next CEO of this company? You should be so happy. You should be up on the moon by this revelation. You knew you were one of Liana’s favorites but never to this extent. And even now, realizing this, your smile was still forced. Your excitement was forced. Your happiness was forced.

“Are you serious? Do you seriously think I can do a good job?” Your voice was small, and Liana only smiled as she nodded and then put a finger over her lips to signal you to keep quiet and then looked at Robin.

“Not a word of this, especially you babbling Robin.” Robin only gave a salute in response as Liana winked at the both of you and walked away. You just stood there, seeing how she put her hand on her belly as she walked to the next set of people. You felt your heart combusting into itself, a huge fire expanding all over you, and you had to try to shake it off. You had to try to shake this moment away because you were feeling humiliated. Defeated.

“Wow, I’m happy for you!” You knew Robin was trying to look at the bright side of things for you. You knew she was trying her best and that she could see the twitch in your eye. The way your gaze didn’t leave Liana’s belly for one second. A baby that was sporadically planned. A baby that, maybe, was planned to save a marriage. 

It wasn’t fair.

“I… yeah.” You finally turned to look at Robin, and you felt your hand itching to reach your phone. To text someone. Him. You wanted to text Eddie. You wanted to see Eddie but why? He is a friend, first and foremost and he has had your back in bad situations before. That’s why. You just feel like you can count on him. That’s all there was.

“We should… go out and celebrate tonight! Go to Jon’s bar and have a few drinks…” Your eyes were distant and your mind suddenly switched. You shouldn’t be sad. You shouldn’t. You were offered to take over Liana’s spot while she was gone. A CEO position! It was big shit! You give her a slow nod, a small genuine smile finally appearing on your lips as Robin could almost sigh in relief.

“Yeah. Yeah! I mean it’s not an official thing, but she said it! I’m her top choice! And you bet your ass Robin I’m taking it.” Robin did a small little happy dance for you, giving a small clap and you finally felt a little bit of the tension you were feeling leave your shoulders.

As long as you don’t look at your boss’ belly, you’ll be fine.

You took another shot with Robin. This being your fourth one of the night.

Nancy was sitting next to her, in front of you, while next to you sat the man you’ve been wanting to see since yesterday night. Since today morning. Since today afternoon. Eddie smirked as he drank his water, having drank only one shot but keeping the status of designated driver in check.

“A CEO, now that’s something else.” Eddie mentioned as you turned your head to look at him, the alcohol not kicking in at all for you, unlike Robin who was already buzzing with it, nudging Nancy who was giggling next to her. 

“I am not a CEO yet, but I am going to be trained to be one.” He hummed in approval, raising his glass at you, prompting you to raise your daiquiri, a sweet drink to show your happiness. That’s definitely what you felt. You two clinked glasses and then you felt your knee being squeezed slightly underneath the table, making your breath hitch for a second.

“Congrats, Peach. You deserve that.” His smile was genuine as he directed it your way and you had to stop your damn heart from beating so fast. There was no need for it to go that quickly. 

“Damn right she does! She got so many clients!” Robin said with a cheer, making you flush as she praised you in front of your friends, making you look down at your glass as you took a sip from it.

“Why are you going into training, though?” Nancy asked, and you stiffened in your place for a second, and the man next to you noticed. You cleared your throat and opened your mouth to talk but Robin beat you to it, which made your blood go cold, not wanting to give the actual explanation or even hear it.

“Liana is leaving because–”

“I’m going to the bar to get another drink.” You said as you raised from your seat, the warm hand that was on your knee retreating for you to scoot away and out of the booth with your almost empty daiquiri glass. You want a beer now. You really want a beer. You know Robin will tell them, but you do not want to listen to it. You don’t want to see the pitiful looks on their faces, much less Eddie’s.

You slowly walked through the crowd, the bar a little crowded thanks to it being a happy hour on a Thursday. Many people came here after work, just like all of you did many times. You reached the bar, Jonathan smiling as he walked up to you from behind it as he cleaned a glass.

“Another one?”

“I want a beer.” His smile faded as a frown now came to happen in his eyebrows and you knew he realized something changed, that something happened.

“Did something happen over there?” You shook your head as a signal of not wanting to talk about it. He gave a single nod as he leaned downwards, grabbing a beer out of the ice bucket. He popped it open as he handed the bottle to you and took the glass of your daiquiri away from you. “Don’t drink too much, you got work tomorrow.”

“Are you my mom?” You gave him a small smile, which he reciprocated, shaking his head at you. His head perked up when he heard someone calling him from the other side of the bar. He gave you a wink before moving away from you, leaving you to stand there with the beer in front of you. You took a long sip of it, feeling the bitterness run down your throat and you groaned at it. 

Why did it have to hit you once again? Why did they have to ask? You didn’t want to turn around, afraid that the group of three might be looking your way with frowns on their faces. You didn’t want to go back and hear the typical ‘It will be okay’. You don’t care. You shouldn’t care.

“Darling?”

Your body froze.

That wasn’t Eddie’s voice. That wasn’t Jonathan’s voice. That wasn’t any of the people you knew in this town’s voice. No. It cannot be. It shouldn’t be. It’s just someone with the same vocal chords, people can have identical voices. It can happen. But, you need to make sure. You need to make sure that it’s not what you think it is. Who you think it is.

Your head turned to your left and you felt your heart dropping to the floor. You no longer feel the cold of the beer in your hand as you stare at the blue-colored eyes in front of you, at the blonde hair that was nice and kept, at the office attire he was wearing. No. Why? Why now? Why here? Why in the bubble you had created for over a year? Why?

“I thought that my eyes had deceived me, but it really is you.” He dared to send a smile your way. He dared to fucking smile at you. He dared to talk to you. He dared to even acknowledge you.

“Henry.” He straightened up in his seat at your small voice. You were just staring at him, wide eyed, frozen. You couldn’t feel your limbs. This was not right. 

“Hi, darling.” You noticed the twinge of nervousness in his tone and you finally felt your body tremble a little bit. You could feel the adrenaline rushing all over as your stomach flipped inside out. 

“Don’t… Don’t call me that.” You stuttered, looking away from him, anywhere, but your vision was blurry, hazy even. Was the alcohol finally hitting you? Right now? No, that wasn’t it. No.

“I’m sorry, it’s just… It’s nice to see you’re… fine.” How fucking dare he say that to you? The pent-up anger was rising in your throat like vile, but then it was just a feeling of pure humiliation as you remembered the two pregnant women you saw today. Something that could have happened to you if he hadn’t gone cheating on you with your best friend. If he hadn’t tricked you. If they hadn’t done an illegal thing to you. 

“Fine…” You scoffed at him, still with a lost look in your eyes, not wanting to look at him. Your tongue was hurting you, your throat was closing up on you, and you felt every inch of your body wanting to rip open. 

“I– I asked your mom where you went… She didn’t really want to give me any details, and that was fair but… I didn’t think I would need a business trip to meet you here.” You finally dared to look at him. Why was he saying these things to you? Why did he even care to talk to you after what he’d done to you?

“I did the divorce papers, and I left, and you should be fucking thankful I didn’t have the energy to take legal action for what you two did to me.” Your mouth was moving all by itself as you talked to him, and Henry sighed, giving a nod your way.

“I know, I know, but– I never got to tell you I am sor–”

“Don’t you even fucking dare to go there.” You wanted to smash the beer in his face. You wanted to bolt out of there. You needed to run. You felt your fingers having an itch to connect to his face in a fist. Did he think the word ‘sorry’ would mend things up? Did he think he would redeem himself with that stupid single word?

“I know we hurt you, but I’m honestly glad you’re alright–”

“Alright? Alright… Yes… In another city, away from my own mother. Yes. I am alright.” He noticed the sarcasm in your voice, the hatred and the pain displayed in your eyes and when you stared at him you couldn’t help but remember how your hand felt over the swollen belly. How the baby moved inside. How it felt to touch something you might never have. How it felt to touch the one thing you thought he would help you in getting.

“You need to calm down, I just– I just wanted to say hi–”

“Hello.” 

Now that voice you recognized. Your head turned to your left as well as Henry’s did. You saw how Eddie’s gaze was trained on him. How he was scanning every inch of your ex husband, not knowing it was him. You– You wanted to leave. You wanted to run away.

“Who are you?” Henry asked as he looked at you and then back at Eddie. He pointed back and forth, “Do you know him?”

“Yes… a friend.” Eddie’s eyes only looked at you when he noticed how small your voice was. You knew he felt something was wrong, and it seems he realized you were not going to introduce the two of them.

“I’m Eddie. You are?” You just stood there, staring at Henry as the asshole smiled politely, sticking his hand out. 

“I’m Henry. Um… Her Ex-Husband. Old friend.” 

You could feel how silent everything went between the three of you. You turned to look at Eddie and– His eyes were staring at Henry’s face. You noticed a vein popping on the side of his neck, and even with all the tattoos, you started to notice the redness that was starting to slowly appear. Your senses were slowly coming back to you as your intuition was telling you that something was going to happen.

“Henry… huh.” Eddie’s voice was low, sending chills down your spine. You didn’t expect Eddie to take Henry’s hand, shaking it slowly. You could use Eddie as a scapegoat, tell Henry to go away, or maybe you could leave, but– “Yeah, I know you.”

And then it was a blur. First you were watching how Eddie was shaking your ex-husband’s hand, and the next, Eddie had pulled him towards him and head-butted Henry right in the middle of the forehead. Then it was a punch. Then another. Then on the floor. Then more punches. You could hear yelling, screaming, Jonathan pulling Eddie away from Henry with your help.

You saw Henry on the floor, holding his face, his nose all bloody, a busted lip. How many punches did Eddie throw? You weren’t sure. Your body was moving, but your mind was not registering anything of what was happening. There was a lot of yelling, Nancy and Robin grabbing you and pulling you out of the bar with Eddie and Jonathan. 

Your eyes caught sight of Eddie still screaming, yelling, his eyes could have been red from the fury that you could feel emanating from him. Jonathan was screaming too as well as Nancy, maybe trying to calm Eddie down, but all you could focus on was the man that just hit your ex-husband square in the face. 

“We need to get out of here. Let’s get her home.” Was that Robin or Nancy? You didn’t know. You just felt yourself being moved, slowly regaining your senses back. You could hear Eddie talking to the girls as you all got into his car, wondering where he drives first.

“I want to be alone.” You were still looking at Eddie and he understood your sign. You could see the bit of confusion in his face that you decided to be with him, instead of Robin.

“You sure?” Robin was asking next to you, even with the slurring in her tongue, you knew she was worried for you. You appreciated it, you nodded at her but– You didn’t need her. You didn’t know what you needed. You needed a distraction as the images came back to your head, the alcohol finally hitting you after the adrenaline that just happened.

You felt your heart bursting as you got inside the passenger’s seat, Nancy and Robin in the back. Eddie was still looking your way, but all you could do was stare forward as he got into the driver’s seat. The car was moving, the lights were passing but all you could see were the smiling women holding their bellies. Henry and Camila in your bed fucking after your third consecutive procedure. 

It wasn’t fair. It wasn’t fair. It wasn’t fair.

Why here? Why did he have to have business here? Why? It wasn’t fair. Was he alone? You didn’t check if he had remarried. You didn’t want to check. You shouldn’t want to. Why would you want to? To see the people that hurt you have what they took away from you? What if Camila was also pregnant? Maybe she was. Maybe she fucking was by now. 

It wasn’t fair. 

“Call me if you need anything. I’ll be here.” You felt a kiss on your temple and you knew Robin had leaned forward from in between the passenger’s and driver’s seats and planted a kiss there. Or was it just pressure?

The car’s doors opened and closed and then it was just the wooden scent cologne and yourself. The drive started again, and you felt so numb. You felt dead. You needed to feel alive again, and Eddie might help with that. You needed Eddie. You wanted Eddie. 

The car ride was silent, and you couldn’t even look at him. It was humiliating for you that he met the man that fucked you over. That broke you. You didn’t want Eddie to be looking at you with worry or pity. You didn’t need that. You didn’t need people to feel sorry for you. You are strong, and you have been strong until now. 

You weren’t going to break. Not again.

The moment he parked, he looked your way as you got out of the car and you motioned for him to follow you. It was silent, it was too silent, but you just needed to reach your apartment. With Eddie. 

The moment you two walked inside your apartment, you felt the heat all over your body, the adrenaline, the emotions just traveling in every blood cell and white cell. You walked towards the couch as you heard the door closing, and you plopped down. 

“Peach… are you alright?” You heard his voice, but you could hardly register what he was asking. You felt the couch dip beside you and you turned your head to finally look at him and– He was looking at you with the eyes you didn’t want. He was staring at you with that pitiful look in his face that you didn’t need.

“Why wouldn’t I be?” You asked, which made him blink your way and you didn’t even register your movements, that you were already climbing up on his lap, his eyes wide in surprise as you cradled his face in your hands. Your lips connected to his and you sighed in relief as you felt the warmth of his kiss against yours. 

Your hips swayed against him, and you felt him groan into the kiss as your arms wrapped around his neck, pulling him closer, flushing your body against him. His hands grabbed onto your waist, his head pulling back for a second as your breath hit his lips.

“Peach, hold on–” You didn’t listen, your head in overdrive as you kissed him again, this time a little more forcefully than before. You didn’t want to think and you didn’t want to talk. You didn’t want to remember any of the events of today or from a year prior. You just needed to feel some warmth, some release. Your chest was against his as your hips kept moving against his, making you sigh into his mouth.

You took this opportunity to let go of him, not breaking the kiss, so you could take off your blazer and throw it away. You didn’t care for much right now, just that you needed to feel him. That you needed him. That you needed to shut your brain down with pleasure, but Eddie was not following your plan, which was making you grow irritated, desperate. He pulled away from your lips again, trying to talk once more.

“Hang on, for just a second–” And you didn’t let him. Your head dove into his neck, biting it gently, eliciting a grunt from his part.

“I need it.” Your voice was a whisper into his skin, your hands traveling to go underneath his shirt, ready to rip it away from him. The images need to go away. The memories need to disappear. Everything needs to go away. 

“Sweetheart–” You started kissing on his pulse point, your hips rubbing once more against him, and you could feel the bulge that started appearing but– He ripped you away from him, roughly, grabbing onto your biceps tightly. He was breathing heavily as he glared at you, and your eyes finally found his.

“Ed–”

“You don’t need this. You don’t need me like this… You need something else, Peach… I can give that too.” 

You just looked at him for a good while. This man that you consider a best friend at this point, despite what the two of you do behind closed doors and under your friends’ noses. Your eyes looked towards the hand that was holding your left bicep and– His knuckles were bloody. His knuckles were red and his skin had been cut. He hurt himself to hurt the man that hurt you.

And everything started sinking in.

Your eyes started burning with the incoming tears as you couldn’t handle the pain. The anger. The sadness. The disappointment. The humiliation you suffered. The struggle of seeing the cause of your pain once again after a year of running away from it. 

Your body shook as tears started leaving your eyes and going down your cheeks. You turned to look at him again, his eyes finding yours, telling you he was here. Telling you he was not going anywhere. You needed Eddie, just not in the way you thought. Your body shook aggressively three times thanks to trying to hold back sobs, only for the fourth one to finally come out.

Then it was one after the other. Eddie’s arms wrapped around your body, pulling you flush to him, laying your head on his shoulder as he let you cry on him. Once again, he was holding you as you cried. He was holding you through something you didn’t think you were going to relive again. You let out cries of pain, staining his shirt with your tears and makeup, but he didn’t care. He never pulled you off him. His hands rubbed your back as he rocked you from side to side and you couldn’t help but just cling to him.

You needed Eddie like this. You wanted Eddie like this.

You wanted Eddie to hold you all day. To tell you that everything was going to be alright. That everything was going to work out. You wanted him to kiss you, to forget, yet to not do more than just that. You wanted Eddie to keep holding you like this, close to him. You wanted more than just the roughness of a kiss or the insinuating touch. 

But it was a thought that your burdened and drunken mind could focus on tomorrow. Right now, you have to cry. You have to cry about the unfairness. You have to cry about what could have been. You are letting yourself cry and he is holding you and rocking you from side to side, soft shushes in your ears–

“I’m here, Peach… I got you, baby. I got you.” 

And when you closed your eyes, you drifted off. You were expecting that in your sleep you would be encountered with nightmares of your past, images of the memories that consumed your being. Instead, you dreamed of your friends. Instead, you dreamed of someone. Instead, you dreamed that somehow, somebody, was telling you to not lose hope. To not let a low life make you think you are not worthy of something like that. Of a family.

Your eyes opened to the sunlight entering your room through the sheer curtains. You winced slightly at the brightness, turning your head to find yourself all alone in your bed. You were wearing a shirt, some sleeping shorts, and you don’t really remember changing. You slowly sat up on your bed, wincing as you felt your body a little sore for some reason, and your neck was stiff.

Your cell phone caught your eyes, and you reached over to grab it, seeing that it was 10 AM. You scrolled through the screen, seeing a message from Robin, Nancy, Jonathan… Everyone was wondering how you were doing. You replied to everyone, telling them you were okay, and in all honesty… you felt lighter. You had overslept, missing work, and there was simple message from Liana telling you Robin told her you felt sick and to get better. You had the day off.

God bless Robin.

The sound of a pan falling outside your bedroom door startled you, making you jump. Oh, Eddie stayed. He didn’t go home. He stayed with you until the morning. Your heart rocked in your chest from side to side and you didn’t mind it this time. You didn’t tell it to calm down. Your feet found the floor, and you walked towards the door, slowly opening it and walking out towards your kitchen to see Eddie cursing as he scrambled some eggs. 

He was shirtless, wearing his boxers only, and your eyes trained on the couch. You winced slightly because of your behavior from last night. You tried to jump his bones when he was trying to stop you, and you feel so pathetic and little for falling into that dark place. You had to apologize and thank him for everything. Your eyes trained on his back, and you felt your stomach flipping inside, or were they butterflies? Nerves? 

“Eds–”

You saw him jump and basically screech, making your eyes go wide as your hand covered your mouth, containing a snort at the display. He turned around to look at you, spatula in one hand, the pan on the other. 

“You fucking scared me Peach, I didn’t think you would wake up until later.” He sighed, letting the air he gasped in when he got scared out. You couldn’t help but smile as he turned around and continued cooking. “The eggs are almost done, and also, you have a four-bread toaster, now that’s fancy shit.” 

“I won it at one of my company’s raffles.” Your voice was calm, walking over to the island counter to sit on one of the stools. You rested your elbows on the marble and put your chin on your hands, and just watched him. You watched him move in your kitchen as if he had always done this. Acting as if this is a common thing you two do every time you hook up with eachother, but this is one of the rare times you two had breakfast together. 

“Oh, can you get me one?”

“You can literally buy it at any electronics store!” You giggled, and he turned around with a cheeky smile on his face that made you crumble a little in your seat.

“It feels better when you win something.” He turned around and turned off the stove, dumping the scrambled eggs on two plates that already had two pieces of toast each. You felt pressure in your chest, a good one, as he turned around and placed the plate in front of you before he opened the fridge, taking out water and juice. He sat on the counter after placing them in front of the two of you and he presented it with both his hands. “Ta-da!”

You smiled at the plate before you, sitting up straight as you grabbed the water to pour yourself some in your glass, as Eddie served himself some juice. It felt domestic. Right. 

“We’ll see how good these eggs are, Munson.” He huffed at you as he grabbed a toast and placed some of the eggs on it with a fork.

“I make the best eggs in all Indiana, sweetheart.” He boosted himself as he took a big bite. Your smile faded as you saw the bruises and the bandaids on his knuckles. You dropped your fork as your hands moved quickly to hold on to his hand, making him almost drop the toast. He winced as he tried to chew– “Easy.”

“You hurt yourself.” His eyes clashed with yours as your body turned completely on the stool to face him. He sighed as he swallowed the bite, getting his hand out of your grasp to put the toast down. 

“He got it worse. I’m sorry, I couldn’t… contain myself when I realized who he was. I couldn’t help it.” He wasn’t really looking at you, but his jaw was clenched and you knew he was still angry, which instead of confusing you, it only made you happy. It made you feel cared for by someone.

“So you… punched him to defend my honor?” You tried to play it off with a small chuckle, but his eyes turned to look at you, serious, filled with something you couldn’t really decipher.

“Every punch I delivered yesterday was not even close enough to what he deserves. What he did, what they did to you… you didn’t deserve any of that.” Your smile had fallen, your eyes burning as you kept staring at him. Your jaw clenched as you felt the beginning of a lump forming in your throat.

“You didn’t… have to do it… but thank you…” He softly smiled at you, giving you a small nod.

“Yeah… I’m kind of banned from going to Jonathan’s bar for a while though… he got mad at me, pretty bad.” He chuckled nervously, and you winced a bit, looking down at your hands, feeling guilty at the situation. He went silent for a second, and he was probably deliberating if to talk about this with you or not. “Robin told us… about why you’re going into training.”

Your blood went cold once again, the memories of yesterday coming back. The news you received. The opportunity those news gave you. The emotions you felt the day before were too much… too much that you crashed out.

“I… yeah…” Your voice was small and fragile. You hated that you sounded like this but– at the same time you didn’t care he was hearing it. You didn’t know why you didn’t care, but you just didn’t. His body turned to face you, his hands pressing on your knees as he leaned to talk to you. Your eyes found his and you suddenly felt… warm.

“It will happen for you…” He stared at you for a while before he continued, “Let’s make a deal.”

“A deal?” Your eyebrow perked up in question and he nodded, his face serious with a glint of mischief and something else.

“When we turn 30, and if we are single… I’ll give you one.”

Your world stopped for a second. Maybe two. Three? What was he saying? 

“I… what?” You were shocked, stunned, not really sure if what just came out of his lips was real or if you had hallucinated it. He gave you a fond smile, his teeth showing.

“If we are single when we turn thirty, I’ll sign any papers you need, and we’ll have a baby together.” Your eyebrows twitched as your eyes kept burning and your body was trying to react in a way that you couldn’t contain much longer. 

“Why… I– You would have a kid… You are willing to have a baby with me? You don’t have to feel… sorry for me…” You were trying to not let your voice crack at the prospect of it. He was promising you a baby. This man in front of you, your friend, your best friend, the man you are fucking in a recurrent manner is promising to give you a baby if the time came that you didn’t have one yet, and both of you were without a partner.

“I want kids. I want a family too someday, and I honestly– Don’t think…” He bit his tongue for a second before continuing, “And I think that you would be the greatest mom in the entire world, so… it’s a win win for me.” 

This is the first time you heard him say he wanted kids. This is the first time you heard him say he wants a family in the future, something you didn’t know at all. Something that was making you melt and crumble in your stool.

You didn’t know what this meant. You didn’t know what anything of what he was saying meant but you wanted to kiss him. You wanted to hug him and kiss him and– Was his heart racing the way yours was? His stomach nervously hurting like yours was? The hairs on his arms standing on end like yours were?

“Eddie, you… You are promising something– something so fucking huge.” His smile fell a little, and he nodded, his eyes staring into yours as he talked.

“And you are the only one I trust enough to make this promise to.” You slowly shook your head at him, thinking this was insane, but– you wouldn’t mind it. Having Eddie’s baby? It didn’t sound entirely wrong. Maybe not even a little bit wrong. 

“You’re… insane.” You couldn’t help it as you let out a snort, and he nodded, a chuckle escaping him. 

“Maybe… so, deal, Peach?” His eyes were sincere as they looked at you, and you realized he meant every single word. He meant everything he said. Everything he promised. Maybe it won’t happen. Maybe he gets a girlfriend or maybe you find… 

“Deal.” You responded quickly, and he smiled widely, straightening up and putting his hand out for you to shake. You took a deep trembling breath in as you smiled and shook his hand.

“Nice doing business with you, fair lady.” You giggled and shook your head, your hand holding his. You inspected his knuckles with your fingers and you slowly raised it up to your lips. You didn’t watch his reaction, but you felt him fall in complete silence as he sat still in front of you. You finally let a tear roll down your cheek as you brush your lips against his knuckles.

“Thank you…” You softly whispered, and he leaned forward, your breathing cutting short when you felt him press his lips against your forehead. You could combust in the spot as you felt warmth invade you, your body flushing completely from head to toe.

“Don’t mention it, sweetheart.” He pulled away and you let go of his hand, looking up at him.

“I’m also sorry… for my behavior… last night.” You were embarrassed as you spoke and he shook his head at you, letting you know he understood.

“It’s okay. You snapped out, which is what matters here.” You two stared at one another as he wiped the tear that fell from your eye and you just… wanted to kiss him. You wanted to hug him and hold him and… He cleared his throat as he turned towards his plate. “We should eat.” 

You nodded and turned to your plate as well, putting some egg on your toast and bringing it to your mouth. The toast wasn’t as crispy because it got cold now, as well as the eggs, but the taste was sublime, yet, you couldn’t not give him shit for it.

“Mmm… not bad.” Was your comment and Eddie turned to look at you as if he were the most offended person on the planet.

“You take that back and say they’re delicious. It’s not my fault they got cold!” You laughed at him as he kept telling you everything he did with the eggs, and everything felt so right. He wasn’t here to get lucky like all those other times. He wasn’t here because he felt like he had to. He wanted to. He wanted to be with you and cheer you up. 

And he did. You cleaned the dishes afterwards as he grabbed your erotica novels and started reciting paragraphs just to piss you off. You laughed as he made up the different voices, moaning when the book said it, or grunting stupidly, and you threw your wet right glove to his face. 

He gasped, rushing towards you so he could rub the glove on your face, making you squeal and try to push him away in disgust. You two laughed as the glove fell on the floor, his arms still holding you close to him. Your heart beat loudly in your chest as you breathed heavily, his face close to yours and you just… 

“I should go home…” He whispered, and you really wanted him to spend the day with you but you knew Robin was going to come to your house at lunch or even earlier, so you nodded slowly.

“Yeah… Robin might just… appear…” He gulped and your lip twitched as you felt your body burn wildly, and you wanted to kiss him. You needed to kiss him. Change the dynamic of your goodbyes, but what if he didn’t want that? What if you were reading all of this wrong? Were you?

But he beat you to it, his jaw clenching as he talked softly, his forehead pressing against yours.

“I don’t want anything… just…” You nodded desperately at him and he leaned forward to finally kiss you. It was soft, tender, and it made every single one of your worries leave your body. You didn’t know why he was kissing you, but you knew why you were kissing him back. Your arms wrapped around his shoulders to pull him closer as your lips smacked with one another’s.

He hummed in between the kiss and you felt his arms and hands holding you in a way you haven’t felt in a long while. You stayed like that for a few seconds before he begrudgingly pulled away, licking his lips as you looked at him, and you didn’t want to let him go, but you had to. 

“So… I’ll… see you later?” You asked, filled with hope, and he gave you a small smile, nodding slowly as he leaned to give you a soft peck on the lips, melting you on the spot.

“Yeah. I’ll message you later. Tell me if you need anything, okay?”

“You’ve done enough, Eddie…” He chuckled and shook his head at you.

“Okay, so I guess you won’t need my scrambled eggs anymore.” You gasped, shaking your head at him, and he smiled triumphantly. “Ah, so my eggs were, in fact, delicious.”

You rolled your eyes and shook your head, pulling away from him to flick him on the right nipple making him squeal and cover it. You saw him walk to your bedroom, and you probably didn’t even notice the pile of clothes he left on the floor or on the desk. You were just staring at his retreating back as you bit your bottom lip, wondering if you should ask him to just stay, to tell Robin to not worry and not come over but you knew that she would not have it. 

When he returned he was all dressed, feeling the keys in his pocket as well as his wallet and phone, making sure he had everything as you put the gloves to dry over the sink counter. You walked to the front door with him, opening the door as he looked at you with something that just told you it was right to do what you wanted to do. So you rose on your tippy toes to give him a peck on the lips to which he returned with another one.

“Bye Eddie… thank you again.” You couldn’t help but keep thanking him, and he took it, smiling down at you.

“Don’t mention it. Bye, Peach.” He walked out, and you waited for him to get to the elevator. He gave you a salute as he got inside and the doors closed before him. You let out a sigh you didn’t know you were holding in and closed your door, leaving you alone in your home once again. 

You rested against it, looking down at the floor as your heart beat to an incredible speed, your stomach filled with something you couldn’t deny were butterflies. Butterflies you have been feeling for a long while. Butterflies you faked by calling them nerves or anxiety or adrenaline whenever you saw him. 

He didn’t promise what he promised just because you were sad. He didn’t just make a promise in order to make you happy. He made a deal with you that felt true even if it’s years away and you don’t even know if Eddie Munson would still be in your life. But fuck, you hoped he did. You hoped he did and that you two would be in a different situation than you are right now.

Because you didn’t want to just hook up with him. It’s time you came to terms with that fact. You wanted to kiss him. You wanted to spend time with him. You wanted to invite him to dinner, watch movies with you, play games, and you were hoping that this new change meant something to him as much as it meant to you. 

And suddenly the troubles from yesterday were nonexistent. The troubles from yesterday and the memories were not as painful as they had hurt you the day before. You knew it was thanks to him. You knew that Robin would not have possibly made you feel the way you are today, and that is mean to say, but he filled the dark hole that resided in your mind. He knew what you needed when you didn’t even know it yourself. 

You needed him. In more ways than one could possibly imagine. You don’t know how you will tackle the relationship now that you came to terms with this. You don’t know how you should act or what you should say to him. You don’t know how to tell him you don’t want him to see someone else. You don’t know how to tell him you want him all for yourself. You don’t know how to tell him all of that without giving yourself away.

Because you’re fucked.

Because you like him.

You like Eddie Munson. You really like Eddie Munson.

end of chapter 21

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[lyricwritesprose]

Me versus a fanfic idea, trying to cohere

Having been watching some of "My Adventures With Superman" lately, and I have become kind of obsessed with a crack idea that came to me last night at fuck o'clock in the morning, that being: what if (in the MAWS continuity or any one in which the Kents are both alive) Jonathan and Martha got roped into briefly housing or fostering a teen after Clark was out on his own?

I mean. Like. Imagine you're this kid. You are staying with the most tragically uncool individuals on this planet, but they're honestly nice, they aren't bothered by all the stuff that got you labeled A Troubled Youth or the gender stuff you may have going on or any of that, they just seem fundamentally Able To Roll With It, and, okay, this is going to be fine. It's temporary anyway. Just keep out of trouble.

And they have an adult son who comes around sometimes? He's kind of nice too. Maybe twenty-one, twenty-two, he's built like a moose and you'd think he'd be imposing but he's kind of shy and awkward and somehow just fundamentally Not Like the people who beat you up before, so you're pretty chill with him. He knows all the good places on the farm to sit and think, or sit and draw. One time when he comes around he shows you the creek and you learn all about the frogs and the crawdads and the snakes. Tells you about the corn snake he rescued once. Stuff like that.

Only some things really don't add up.

Like, there's never a car in the driveway when he shows up. And it's not on weekends or anything like that, it's weird times.

And there's a note on the fridge that says, "If you drink all the milk please replace it THIS MEANS YOU," and before long you figure out it's gotta be meant for him, because he will take a gallon and finish it a glass at a time and who can even do that without throwing up? Wasn't there some kind of ghastly TikTok challenge about that?

And when you joked to his Dad and Mom that he seems to have a real superpower for figuring out whether there is going to be pie, you got such weird, almost nervous looks that you quickly dropped the subject.

And one time you swear he appeared out of absolutely nowhere to walk you back to the house because Mr. Peterson's bull broke the fence and is wandering this way. (He was the first one to realize this. How did he realize this? He's sort of guiltily evasive on the subject.)

And he reassures you one time that you don't actually need to fear the Kansas Mothman because he accidentally started that legend. How? He really doesn't want to talk about it.

What with one thing and another, you start wondering…

Maybe he's a ghost.

Maybe something awful happened and he can't move on. You don't want to suspect the Kents, they are honestly pretty top-notch for parental types (especially after some of the ones you've known) but other people in the town? You know personally how ghastly a small town can be to That Weird Kid. Maybe something really bad happened.

(Maybe it could happen to you too.)

So you've got to figure out what's going on so you can get justice for your friend. You start to investigate. Smallville does have rather more than its fair share of Weird Shit—like possibly a lot more—but you're not really getting anywhere. And it occurs to you that you don't really have the wherewithal to go and try to find—well, let's not put too fine a point on it, to find an unmarked grave—that could be anywhere.

Meanwhile the world has at this point in time started to see some Seriously Weird Shit, although at this point it's largely In Other Places because that's where everything in the world happens, there is absolutely Nothing Significant In Kansas and probably never will be, but it gives you an idea. Slightly insane and scary idea, but you've hit so many dead ends that it might be worth it.

You're going to try to contact Superman and see if he can use his rumored X-ray vision to figure out what happened to Clark.

…

Just to be clear, I have no idea what the ultimate punchline is for this piece of ridiculous meandering is, and it's the sort of thing that does require a pretty good punchline. So I don't know if it's ever actually going to get written. On the other hand, it is one of my favorite dishes, which is Canon Characters Helping Queer Kid, with a heavy helping of Following Logic-like Structures To Wrong Conclusions sauce.

So I thought I might post the idea, because I have this lovely optimistic belief that sometimes, I am in fact extremely funny, and tumblr is a place that often eggs me on.

[littledemondani]

Are you, by any chance, still accepting fuckboy!Eddie thoughts.....because I got one and it's driving me insane

fuckboy!Eddie's jaw does THAT hot thing when he gets jealous and possessive. You know like the clenching thing??? Good god

It's his not-so-subtle way of trying to show that he doesn't care BUT HE OBVIOUSLY DOES

Anyway I'm so down bad for him oh my god

ohhhh my goooddd!

warnings: 18+, mentions of smoking weed, petting, jealousy, fem!reader, fuckboy!eddie, alcohol use

he always reacts so nonchalant at the mention of you being with other people. and for the most part, he is. you’re both single and not looking for a serious relationship.

the first time he sees it happen, though, he feels blind rage.

he had been enjoying himself at steve’s birthday party. ever since he moved out of hawkins, he didn’t get to see all of his friends every day the way he used to. he decided to bring you with him. show you what his life was like before indianapolis.

you and steve hit it off right away. eddie isn’t surprised, though. you’re extremely easy to get along with and attract people like a magnet. he was actually glad that you were getting along so well with his friends. you fit right in as if you’d always been there.

eddie watched you get closer and closer to steve as the night went on. what started out as innocent interactions turned into you sitting in steve’s lap out by the pool with his tongue down your throat.

his heart beats faster, brows pinch together, his breathing picks up, his jaw and teeth clench. he crushes the now empty PBR can as he stares at the two of you from the back doorway.

jonathan, who had asked eddie if he wanted to head outside to smoke a joint, is confused by eddie stopping in his tracks so suddenly. he follows eddie’s gaze and it all clicks for him.

“didn’t know you were into her like that,” he says as he takes the lighter out of his pocket.

“what’re you talking about?” eddie asks in confusion.

“you like her, dude,” jonathan states as if it’s the most obvious thing.

“no. i don’t. i mean…not like that,” eddie explains. “she’s a cool girl and all, but, i don’t see her that way.”

jonathan chuckles and shakes his head. “yeah, man, whatever you say.”

eddie scoffs and gently rolls his eyes as he turns his gaze back to you and steve. you’re not aware of anyone else being around, entirely in your own little bubble with steve’s hand underneath your shirt and you palming at his hardening cock.

he swallows thickly before tearing himself away to join jonathan. he needs to get high and not think about you touching and kissing steve the way you touch and kiss him.

[beenoeila]

A list of underrated fics I adore.

▪️this don’t feel anything like sinking by

@dontcallmebree

A little over six weeks and his knee heals only for his breathing to act up. It may have been a handful of decades—coming up on a century, even—but he never did forget how it felt to wheeze through the night.

Steve sees it coming when Dr. Youssef tells him his lungs are taking a turn.

The year 2032 brings about the Summer Olympics, the coldest winter of the decade, and an end to Project Rebirth.

🔹 Learning to want by @luna-rainbow

Bucky is still trying to piece together his memories, but at least he now had Steve with him.

When Steve asks him if he wanted to meet with his sister, Becca, his response was, "I don't know about wants...I'll start with the shoulds."

Steve and Bucky goes for lunch with Becca. Steve and Bucky dealing with memory loss. Steve and Bucky being mutually pining idiots.

▪️better to speak or die by emilywithoutY (@between-a-ship-and-a-hard-place)

Summers in C. are as endless and hazy as when they were kids. All James wants is to play his part well enough that his mother stops looking at him with that twist of regret in her smile.

The only thing to break the sun-soaked monotony is the arrival of the new summer intern. While the rest of the household—and half the village—fawn over Steve Roger’s movie star looks and understated charm, James finds him aloof and his polite interest near unbearable.

But as they collide in vulnerable moments, the sparks of frustration ignite something neither has the power to stop.

Do you think Jonathan understood what happened that day David first stepped into his father’s court?

🔹The weapon remembers by pushdragon

The Winter Soldier finds old fantasies of Steve in his memory, and takes them for reality.

He's got two days to sort out all his mixed-up history, before he puts himself back in cryo freeze. Harder still, he's got to convince Steve to let him do it.

▪️Preberseeschießen by Ginny_Potter (@hipsterdiva)

Bucky takes his time, ignoring his comrades’ cheering and Gaiswinkler and Mariandl’s teasing. From his position, Steve only has an oblique view of Bucky’s face, which is mostly in the dark anyway – the strong line of his jaw, a smudge of grease on his cheekbone, a sweaty lock of hair curling on his forehead, his mouth pouting in concentration. Steve itches to draw him, to take out his battered sketchbook and reproduce that instant of perfect imperfection. Steve itches to touch him, push back his unruly curls, wipe away the smudge on his cheekbone, cup his face in his hands and…

Bucky breathes out and shoots. The bullet hits water… and there it is, the zapping sound of paper tearing.

The light turns on and off three times. Third circle. Just a lick out of bullseye.

The Howlies explode in cheers.

Or, the Howling Commandos play a shooting game with the Austrian Resistance and Steve has lots of unresolved feelings about himself, his new body, and his changing relationship with Bucky. In other words, comrades are comrades, angst looms, and Steve feels.

🔹Till there were no more wolves in the West

by @dharmasharks

“I’m afraid of a lot of things, Steve,” Bucky says softly.

“But this thing sticking in my heart—the part of me that’s yours? It is the best part of me. Maybe the only good part.” His rueful smile wavers. He makes a pained expression.

“What if it’s the only good part?” he asks.

Two Brooklyn boys find themselves aboard an orphan train headed west in 1854. Across farmland, war, and the lawless frontier, a childhood promise helps them find each other again.

(A Western SteveBucky retelling.)

▪️Hiraeth by ixalit

Hiraeth

noun /ˈhɪraɨ̯θ/

[Welsh] A homesickness or nostalgia, an earnest longing or desire, or a sense of regret. The feeling of longing for a home that never was.

🔹Undone by justanotherStonyfan

You’d think, given everything, that if one of them were going to regress, that if one of them were going to break down, it would be Bucky.

(Set mostly after Endgame - canon deaths remain but Steve doesn't leave)

▪️But You Can Hold Me (Only 'Cause It's a Cold Night in Brooklyn) by Voylitscope_speed (@voylitscope)

This should just be two friends getting off after the burlesque show. This should just be two pals both thinking about the girl. That would probably be okay, Bucky thinks.

But then he ruins it all when he says,

"Come here," and puts a hand out to tug on Steve's shoulder.

(Or: Sometimes, Bucky and Steve lend each other a hand, literally. Bucky tries not to be weird about it, but he's always been bad at controlling his thoughts about Steve.)

🔹Midlife Crisis by profoundalpacakitten

Steve isn’t expecting much of anything from life, he’s content to coast by, letting life flow past. Get up, get dressed, get to work, get home, get to sleep, rinse and repeat.

▪️ The Magic Touch by @broodybuck

The soldier is finally free but he has one big problem, he can't finish. Until he meets a man called Steve who apparently has the magic touch.

[mysaintkitten]

hi g!! firstly i have to tell you how much i love your work, you’re incredibly talented and i’m always so excited whenever you post something.

i have this idea for a story: you and neil have dated for months but you recently split up and neither of you seem to get over the other, so one night after a failed attempt on forgetting him you somehow end up in his bed again. old habits die hard…

hope u have a nice day :)

first of all .. thank you so much !! you are so incredibly kind !! second of all, i made this a liiiiiittle bit angsty and fluffy but still smutty !! i loved the breakup sex idea so i was so eager to write about this :)

Break Up | Neil Lewis x fem!reader

prompt: you and neil split up (NSFW!!!! NO MINORS!!!!)

WARNINGS: (brief) fighting, (brief) mentions of mental health struggles, oral (f receiving), unprotected sex (p in v), creampie

word count: 3.8k

the break up was messy. both you and neil shot vile, unnecessary insults at each other as he scrounged around your shared apartment to gather his belongings before leaving.

“you’re pathetic, neil. absolutely fucking pathetic.” you spat, desperate to make a dig that’ll hurt him.

“you know what? you aren’t even worth all this anyway.” neil snarls before swinging the door open, “you’re a cold-hearted cunt and i hope i never have the displeasure of seeing you again.”

you scoff, “feelings mutual, sweetheart.”

before he’s even fully out the door, you violently slam it shut, bumping neil in the process. he mumbles a few more profanities before finally leaving.

moments after this altercation, you’re left pacing around the living room. your mind flooded with him, the memories, the pain. what starts off as vicious rage, quickly switches into overwhelming despair. you just collapse. your knees falling to the ground as you sob into your hands. how did this happen? how can something so good sour so quickly?

neil fell victim to the same fate. he kept his composure until he got into his car. as soon as he shut the door, he was hit with a subtle waft of your essence. he wasn’t sure what exactly he was smelling, whether it was your detergent, or body wash, or perfume, but it was your smell. and it hit him like a ton of bricks. he teared up a bit, but he tried his best to stay calm until he found somewhere to stay for the night.

he drove to some miscellaneous pizza place and cried in the parking lot. god, he thinks, this is almost worse than crying in front of you. he feels pathetic, angry, depressed. he wipes his face and heads into the pizza shop, orders himself a pizza, and calls jonathan while he waits.

“hey dude, i know this is short notice, do you mind if i crash at your place for a bit? (y/n) and i broke up, it was really bad man ..” neil asks while pacing around outside the shop awkwardly.

“yeah, dude, of course. however long you may need. plus, while you’re here i need to discuss some things to you about a shipment that lucien and i picked out.” jonathan responds.

neil appreciates jonathan’s hospitality, but the last thing he wants to talk about is business. he wants to crawl onto jonathan’s couch and sleep, at least for a day or two, just avoid the world all together. but he’s an adult man, a business man at that, depression won’t pay the bills.

“yeah yeah,” neil answers, “sounds good. i’ll bring a pizza by too. maybe i’ll pick up some beers.”

“sick!” jonathan says eagerly, he appreciates the bare minimum, that’s what neil likes about him, “let me know when you’re here i’ll buzz you up.”

they say their goodbyes and neil hangs up, continuing to linger outside the store. he basks in the silence of the streets, the cool breeze, the dull and numb feeling that’s stuck in his chest.

once the pizzas ready, he thanks the workers and tips them graciously. he then picks up the beers for him and jonathan to share, before quickly speeding over to jonathan’s apartment, trying to get there while the pizzas still warm.

he arrives to jonathan’s place and they do as expected, eat, drink, watch movies, discuss business. neil feels as though he’s watching himself through some sort of film, like he’s not in control of his body. it felt uneasy. he believes the severity of the breakup has caused him minor disassociation, in some way. he’s desperate to vent. he has thousands of pent up feelings boiling within him and he needs to let out even the slightest bit of steam.

neil swallows harshly, “you know, man, i just really think i screwed it up with (y/n) ..”

“yeah, chicks are crazy.” jonathan retorts while grabbing neil’s empty plate from in front of him. jonathan doesn’t like to talk about feelings very much, that’s what neil doesn’t like about him.

but neil gets the hint. no sense in rambling to a man who won’t listen. so he grabs his beer and chugs down the rest, almost immediately proceeding to crack open another one.

jonathan puts on a movie that he knows neil likes and the two sit in near silence and watch. jonathan’s silent because he’s paying attention, neil’s silent because his mind is reeling. all he can think about is what he said to you, what you said to him, what it’ll be like to see you out in public. it branches into what’ll it be like when he sees you out with someone else? he can’t stomach the thought right now, he needs to go to sleep.

neil sits through the movie, trying his hardest to pay attention to what’s on screen and try to forget what had happened earlier. he wasn’t successful. but he tried.

the movie ends and jonathan pats his knees before standing up, “well, i gotta crash,” he yawns, “help yourself to whatever’s in the fridge. use the tv if you’d like, just keep the volume at a decent level.”

“no yeah, definitely. thanks again, man.” neil responded.

the entire night he lays awake. he tosses and turns trying to sleep, but his mind won’t rest.

he stays this way for a few days.

he starts to slowly move on, little by little, until one day he hears that you were spotted with a guy. as soon as those words hit his ears, he feels a lump form in his throat. that’s it. that’s his breaking point.

without much thought, he storms off to his car and drives over to the shared apartment that you have now taken basically full ownership over. he hurriedly rushes inside while being bombarded with visuals of you with other guys, you fucking them, them using you, and worst of all, them just being affectionate with you. thinking of you holding their hand, them kissing your cheek and making you giggle, you dancing in the kitchen with them. just like you used to do with him.

before he’s even realized it he’s ended up outside your door. he stands there for a few seconds to gather his thoughts, he didn’t really come over with a plan, he just felt compelled to come.

neil raises his hand and knocks on your door. he can hear your footsteps approaching. but what if it’s a guy coming? your new boy-toy? he doesn’t know what he’ll do with himself if he sees your new partner right now.

you swing the door open, confused and shocked to see neil on the other side.

your eyes widen, “uh .. neil .. what ar-“ you say before he nudges you lightly out of the way, “i forgot some things ..” he mumbles before quickly making his way to your bedroom.

“neil? what did you forget?” you call out, trying to catch up to him, “hello? what did you forget?”

“oh, am i interrupting something? just give me a minute.” he groans rudely

“interrupting? what are you implying?” you question, feeling even more confused.

“oh, nothing, i just didn’t know if your new boyfriend was over, or whatever.”

the confusion starts to become anger, “what? neil, what the fuck is wrong with you? who said i have a new boyfriend? and what business is it to you anyway?”

he turns to you and laughs, “we’ve been broken up for less than a month and you’re already moving on! did i not matter at all to you?”

“again, even if i was seeing someone new, it’s not your business.” you snap, crossing your arms in front of your body.

he just scoffs as he feels tears begin to prick at the corners of his eyes, “i’ll get what i forgot and i’ll leave. you’ll never see me again.”

you can hear something in his tone, “neil? are you alright?”

you’re fuming, he’s infiltrated your space and now he’s attempting to start a fight? but simultaneously, you still feel a deep sense of empathy for him. you’re still in love with him after all.

“i’m f-fine.” he stammers, actively keeping his back towards you while sifting through piles of clothes, he can’t bear to see your face right now.

“are you sure? you don’t sound alright ..” you reply softly, placing a hand on his shoulder soothingly.

“i’m fine! jesus, (y/n)! just let me look, please!” his voice cracks as he swats your hand away, he knows he can only keep up this front for so long.

“neil, we were together for months, i know you better than you know yourself, tell me what’s wrong.”

we were together.

those three words made him nauseous to hear, he knew the two of you were done, but to hear it hurt on a different level.

he loses it, the tears start to pour out from his eyes.

you hear him begin to cry quietly, his hands coming up to cover his face.

“what is it?” you ask one last time as your voice begins to break, you had been struggling as well. but you, like neil, kept it mostly to yourself. you rotted away in your apartment, barely even showering or maintaining yourself. but today he saw you on a relatively good day, you felt motivation to shower and clean. if he had caught you on any other day, you would’ve been absolutely mortified.

neil finally turns around, his face red and cheeks wet with tears.

“what happened to us?” he sighs, “we were so good, (y/n),” your eyes are nearly welling with tears. “i thought i was going to marry you.” he adds, his voice barely above a whisper.

you’re at a loss for words, you didn’t know what happened either. it’s like one day something between you just switched. you were both stubborn, but that had never been an issue, until it was mixed with unexpected changes and outside stressors, you eventually just couldn’t stand each other.

you can’t hold it in anymore, you begin to sob in front of him.

“i loved you, neil.” you walk closer to him, “i didn’t mean what i said. i just felt hurt, and i wanted to hurt you back.”

“i know,” he chuckles through the tears, “i know. i felt the same, i didn’t mean it either.”

you missed neil, so so dearly, and you wished that he could come back to make amends. now here he is, and here’s your opportunity.

you swallow your pride, “i miss you.”

you see something shift within him once those words leave your mouth, “i miss you too.” he mutters.

he grabs your face and runs his thumb along your cheek before planting a kiss on your lips. you’re shocked, but you wanted this. you’ve been craving this. you kiss him back.

he pulls away briefly to see your expression, but you lean forward immediately to kiss him again more passionately.

he groans into your mouth, bringing his hands down to the dip of your back.

“missed you so much ..” he whines into your mouth while wrapping his arms around your waist, clenching you close to his body. you bring your hands up to your head and run your fingers through his hair, occasionally bringing your hands down to touch his shoulder blades.

neil slips his hands under your shirt and unclasps your bra.

“mmh .. neil, we can’t ..” you groan between kisses, although you aren’t making much efforts to stop him

he slips his tongue into your mouth and makes the kiss sloppier, moaning softly in the process

“let me make it up to you .. please ..” he begs, creeping his hands down to your ass.

he grips it gently and feels himself growing hard. since the breakup, he’s had a lot of pent up sexual tension. he’s been couch surfing, which isn’t exactly ideal for private intimate times, so he was rarely able to get off. so now even just the sensation of your ass has him popping a chub already.

as you kiss, he starts to slowly guide you towards the bed. eventually the end of the bed meets the back of your legs, and you stumble back with neil on top of you.

you detach from his lips and shuffle your body back, neil follows your lead and moves his lips down to your neck, kissing and sucking softly. his lips on your neck and the warm friction of his body is causing you to get undeniably wet. this isn’t the best way to go about things, you and him should’ve maybe had a civil and thoughtful discussion. but you suddenly feel his bulge graze against you, neither of you are in the right state to sit and talk.

his kisses begin to move downward to your collar bone, almost to your chest, but he halts.

“can you take off your shirt?”

without responding, you slip your shirt and now unclasped bra off. he resumes his kisses down your chest until he gets to one of your nipples, he swirls his tongue around the harding bud, suckling on it gently soon after while moaning lowly.

you gasp and arch your back, “missed these tits ..” he groans against your skin, bringing one of his hands up to knead your other breast.

before long, his kisses trail down your torso, sliding his hands down your sides to grip your hips. his kisses stop at your navel, where he looks up at you from between your legs, slinking his fingers down to your waistband where he hooks his fingers in. he tugs them down lightly, but stops. watching your face attentively for your approval.

you raise your hips and allow him to continue to pull your pants and underwear off. he moves out of the way briefly to efficiently tear them off, before quickly going back to where he was originally, directly between your legs. he groans at the sight of your wetness.

neil places small kisses along your inner thighs while latching his hands beneath them, his lips inching closer and closer to your pussy. he plants a wet kiss on your lower lips, making you whine at the sudden, but much needed gesture.

he continued to kiss, sloppier and sloppier, until the kisses become blatant licks against your clit.

“mmh! ne-il!” you whimper, rutting against his face slightly. he hums, gripping your thighs harder, “missed this cunt so much ..”

as you moan and rut, neil gets more determined to make you come on his face. he laps you up, occasionally dipping down to use his nose while he prods your hole with his tongue, or using his chin to rub your clit while he stares at you twitching in bliss. he’s utilizing his face in ways he never has before, he seems nearly ravenous.

he sucks on your clit gently before detaching his mouth, “use my face t’come, show me how much you want it.”

“i want it,” you moan breathily as you lock your fingers into his hair, “i want it so bad!”

he smiles against you. sucking, rubbing, and licking all of your sensitive areas. you using his face purely to get off gets him unbearably hard, he begins to grind against the mattress beneath him for some sort of relief

your gasps and whines progressively get louder and louder, to the point where your eyes are squeezed shut and your mouth hangs slightly slack, neil just watches. he missed you as a person, as a partner, but he also missed watching you be pleased. the way your body and face contorts, knowing it’s all from his touches, it just couldn’t compare to anything else.

his jaw is sore, his scalp hurts from your pulling, and the entire lower half of his face is dripping wet with a mixture of your arousal and his own saliva, but he has no intentions of stopping. not until you come on his face.

your ruts start to get quicker and needier, your thighs shaking and tensing in the process as you gasp and beg for neil to make you come.

“please, please, please,” you babble quietly, “i’m so close.”

neil can barely breathe, and he’s so incredibly hard he’s afraid he may faint from the loss of blood and oxygen flow. he groans against your pussy, crude sounds of moans and slight squelching fill the room.

your orgasm is inching closer and closer until it finally hits. your mind going blank and your hips movements coming to a stop, your thighs clench around him and twitch around his head. you’re quiet as you come, as if the air has been sucked from your lungs. neil licks you through your high, until you’ve become too sensitive and have to push him away.

“too much .. too much ..” you whine, neil hesitantly pulls away. he could stay between your legs forever.

he places small kisses on your inner thighs and sighs deeply against you. once he catches his breath, he trails back up your body with kisses. eventually his lips end up at your neck, he places a small lick onto the shell of your ear while sneaking his hand between his legs and palming himself.

“nothing else compares to you .. nothing .. no one ..“ he mumbles, hastily unzipping his fly and pulling his pants down with one hand, “i think your pussy was designed just f’me ..”

you whimper and place your hands on his clothed back, “this .. off .. please-“

he places one more wet kiss on your neck before sitting his body up. his eyes are glossy and his lips are a rich pink colour. he takes off his shirt and you can’t help but compliment him,

“you look so handsome.” you chuckle

he smirks, “thanks, i think eating pussy gives you some sort of natural glow, or so i’ve heard.”

you roll your eyes playfully and hook your fingers into his boxers waistband, “take these off, too.”

neil laughs breathily and removes his boxers, his hard, sensitive member springing free. his tip glistens from his arousal, you bring your hand to his cock and grip him weakly while pumping him.

he moans and his eyes shoot down to between his legs, watching you pump him, “oh, fuck ..”

his moans enable you further, you begin to pump him quicker. he huffs and whines before gripping your wrists and stopping your movements, “stop, stop”

you let go, “if you keep going i’ll come on your hand, i need your pussy.” he mewls as he lowers himself between your legs and aligning his cock head with your opening.

your pussy is extremely slick from the combination of his spit, your orgasm, and your persistent arousal, so he slides himself in with no issue. making the both of you groan at the sensation. as he bottoms out, he just sits inside you for a few moments, simply enjoying the embrace of your warm and wet cunt. you whine at the fullness you had been missing, while neil was away you’d attempt to finger yourself, but your own fingers didn’t compare at all to his cock. the feeling reminds you of what neil said, “i think your pussy was designed just for me”, maybe it’s truer than you thought.

his hips shift back and he slowly thrusts himself out, before quickly snapping back in. his pace is quick and needy, you don’t think you’ve ever seen him fuck you so desperately.

“neil-l .. mmh!” you gasp, swinging your hand over your mouth to cover your loud moans. neil chuckles and swipes your hand out of the way, “let me hear you, your noises are so pretty.”

“o-oh, stop ..” you tease, having just enough composure within you to still banter slightly with neil as he fucks you

“‘m serious ..” he moans, “hearing how good my cock is making y’feel .. so fucking sexy ..”

his pace gets rougher, and you almost instantly lose whatever snarky response you had in mind, “god, f-uck!” you cry out, bringing your hands down to your sides to grab the duvet beneath you.

as he thrusts into you, his eyes dart between your fucked-out face and your tits, which are bouncing slightly from his force. he places a hand onto your hip and the other onto your tit, both hands gripping harshly on whatever they’re grabbing. you whine at the aggression, feeling it get you hotter and wetter.

neil huffs and glances down at your pussy, whimpering at what he sees, “jesus, so fucking wet”

“you got me t-this wet ..” you stammer, feeding into neil’s neediness.

he moans, “y-yeah?”, his voice high and shaky, normally he’d want to come off as dominant and basically stoic, but right now he’s absolutely pussy-whipped, he couldn’t pull himself together if he tried.

hearing the pleasure in his tone makes you hum, your legs wrapping around him and squeezing him lightly.

he laughs and gulps, “so desperate to keep my cock inside.”

you nod quickly and snake your hand between your legs to rub your clit as you clench around him involuntarily. neil whimpers small sounds of approval, knowing how close you are to coming. his breaths are heavy and he’s having a hard time keeping up the quick rough pace, both of you are approaching your orgasms rapidly. the aesthetics of it really don’t matter, the pleasures your bodies are giving each other is what matters above all else.

“gonna come ..” neil swallows, “gonna come ..”

you wanna tell him you’re going to come too, but you physically can’t vocalize it, but you assume your whimpers and clenching and wetness is telling enough.

moments later, you’re coming on his cock, “n-eil!” you shout as your body convulses slightly from the overwhelming sensation. watching you come pushes him over the edge completely, “yeah, yeah, fuck!” he rambles, his brows furrowing and mouth hanging slack as he comes while continuing to pump himself inside you.

you ride out your orgasms until it eventually becomes too overstimulating for the both of you, he pulls out his softening cock and huffs. your thighs twitch at the feeling of his and yours come begin to slowly drip out from inside of you. neil smirks proudly “i missed seeing this too .. so goddamn much ..”

after that, you and him sit in silence for a little. you don’t really know what to say, and you don’t know what you are. still exes? friends? partners?

instead of pondering, you think fuck it and just ask;

“what are we now?”

“what do you want us to be?” he responds

“i want us to get back together.”

“i want that, too.”

——

back to my old reliable .. neil !!!

[slut4thebroken]

Exposure Therapy pt. 11

── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

Pairing | Jonathan Crane x reader

Summary | Jon is so down bad it’s a little embarrassing tbh. Like this whole chapter is full of simp behavior but we love it.

Warnings | Ushy gushy nasty ass fluffy smut, kissing, hickeys, cunnilingus, unprotected sex, breeding, Jon is so fucking soft bro, mentions of rape and kidnapping, nightmares, comfort, idk what else tbh.

Words | 5.7k

Notes | Okay first of all, I’m so sorry it took so long 😭 Second, don’t come for me if his backstory is wrong. The internet says like a million different things so I just used my best judgment for what was right lol. Also I’m running out of gifs 😞

Ao3 link | <3

Fic Masterlist

Main Masterlist

Part 10

“Where are we going?” You asked as he led you through the dark streets, keeping a hand on the small of your back. He had you pack up everything in the duffel bag before leaving, not giving you any indication of where he was taking you. 

“Quit asking, we’re almost there.” You rolled your eyes at that, but stayed silent. He had you enter what looked like an old, almost abandoned apartment building, then took you up two flights of stairs before going down the hall and stopping in front of a door. He reached in his pocket and grabbed a key, then opened it. 

“Jon… What is this?” You don’t remember him mentioning anything about this. When you walked in, you examined the space in shock. 

“It's yours— ours. I bought it for us… Kind of.” 

“Kind of?” You asked, looking at him again. 

“I threatened the landlord.” You scoffed a laugh and could feel your stomach flutter when he gave you a small smile. 

“It came fully furnished?” You walked over to the bed and plopped down on it, closing your eyes and groaning at the feeling of a proper mattress. 

“Most of the furniture, yes. But he was more than willing to include a mattress and some complimentary sheets and towels after our conversation.” You heard his footsteps growing closer but you kept your eyes shut, savoring the feeling. “Do you like it?” You finally opened your eyes and turned your head to look at him with a smile. 

“I love it.” Suddenly hit with an idea, you leaned up on your elbows, then continued. “You know… You’ve never fucked me on an actual bed before.” You said with a small smirk. 

“In that case, we’re going to be very busy.” He crawled over you and you fell onto your back again, wrapping your arms around his shoulders once his face was level with yours. “Because I’ve never fucked you on a kitchen table, a counter, or in the shower either.” Your cheeks heated up at the implication, despite the fact that you just made a similar remark. 

“I guess we better get to it then.” You said, voice already embarrassingly breathless. He leaned down to kiss you, starting out slow and soft but quickly growing more rough and passionate. He kissed his way down your body, removing your clothes to expose more skin. Once he was at your hips, he laid down between your legs before continuing. He kissed from one thigh to the other, never going where you wanted him to. When you let out a needy whine and grabbed his hair, he laughed under his breath, but gave it to you anyway. He started with a light kiss on your clit, then licked a long stripe up your folds. You let out a shaky breath, trying your best to be patient, but failing anyway. 

“Jon, please.” You whined, lightly tugging on his hair. 

“Shh, be patient, little one.” He said softly. You whined again, but it cut off into a moan when leaned down to suck you clit into his mouth. 

“Fuck— please..” You whimpered, pulling harder on his hair and letting your eyes flutter closed. A moan caught in your throat when he suddenly pushed a finger inside, immediately curling it against your walls, making your back arch as you pushed your hips down onto the stimulation. His movements were slow, but deliberate, carefully manipulating your body to bring you closer to the edge.

“Feel good?” He mumbled against you. You let out an embarrassing mewl as you nodded. 

“Yes..” You said through a breath. “Jon.. need you.” You whined, making him pull up from your clit. 

“You’re not ready yet,”

“I am— please.” You’re not. But you need him inside you already. His finger slowed to a stop and you watched him with furrowed brows, waiting. 

“Can you wait just a little longer for me?” He asked softly, in that voice that makes you instantly melt and want to do whatever he says. You nodded with a pout and the corners of his lips turned up at your obedience. “Good girl.” He pushed another finger inside as he leaned back down to keep sucking and licking your clit. 

You grabbed his free hand, intertwining your fingers before resting it on the bed, and as he looked up at you, you swore you felt him smile against you. When a third finger entered you, your grip tightened on his hand and you let out a quiet whimper. He focused more on stretching his fingers inside you now and even though it didn’t feel as good, you just had to remind yourself that it was getting you closer to him finally fucking you. 

“Please.” You whined, gasping when he lightly bit your clit. You understood the warning though— be patient. ‘Just a little longer’ was turning out to be longer than you expected and you could feel your orgasm rapidly approaching. “Jon— Jon, wait..” You whimpered, pushing at his head now, rather than pulling him closer. 

“Fuck— please, I want to come on your cock.” You whined. That made him finally pull back as he cursed under his breath. He wiped his face with the back of his hand and nodded, chest heaving as he panted. 

He removed his clothes quickly and you waited eagerly, trying not to complain about how long it was taking even though it only took him barely a minute to fully undress. He crawled over you and brushed your hair out of your face before cupping your cheek. 

“Say, please.” He said teasingly. 

“Jon,” You whined, long and bratty. When he stayed silent, you huffed, then said, “please fuck me.” 

“Good girl. Though I’m not sure I’m completely convinced.” You let out a low growl and used strength you didn’t know you had to roll both of you over so you were on top. He raised his brows, seemingly amused by your eagerness, and you ignored him as you lined yourself up with his cock. The smug expression left instantly when you sunk down, only stopping once your ass met his thighs. 

“Say, please.” You smirked, watching his face contort with pleasure. 

“Cute.” He said through a breath and you relaxed your legs so you were completely sitting on his lap, making both of you moan when you took him even deeper. You looked at him expectantly, watching as he rolled his eyes. When he reached for your hips, you grabbed his wrists and pinned them to the bed. 

“C’mon, Jon. Say it.” Despite the fact that he huffed and rolled his eyes again, you could feel his cock twitch inside you. You didn’t want to push your luck though by telling him you knew he was enjoying the slight role reversal, so you just waited for his response. Eventually he let out a heavy breath, staring up at you. 

“Please.” He muttered, making you grin. 

“Good boy. Though I’m not sure I’m completely convinced.”

“Please.” He repeated, firmer this time, but still with attitude. Instead of responding, you started rocking your hips. His fists clenched where they were pinned to the bed and he tilted his head back as his eyes fell shut. 

“Don’t be a tease.” He said, when you didn’t speed up. 

“Why not? I like how you look like this.”

“Everything you do now, I’ll do ten times worse to you later.” He warned, making you smirk. 

“I’m sure you will, Jon.” You didn’t give him a chance to reply before switching it up, starting to move up and down now, still maintaining the agonizingly slow pace. You let go of his wrists and placed your hands on his torso to stabilize yourself and help take some of the strain off your legs. His hands settled on your hips, but he barely grabbed you, just lightly rested them there. 

After only a few minutes, your legs were starting to shake and you slowed to a stop as you caught your breath. 

“Jon..” You whined with a pout. 

“Yes, little one?” He asked coyly, making you frown. 

“Please…”

“Please what?”

“Take over already! My legs are giving out.” You laughed weakly, trying to play it off as a joke. 

“Thought you said you like how I look like this?” 

“I do, but— not the whole time.” You whined. 

“You wanted to be on top, I’m giving you what you wanted.” He shrugged, thumbs rubbing circles on your hips. 

“Well now I want you to be on top!” If you weren’t so desperate, you would’ve been embarrassed by how whiny your voice sounded.  “Jon, please, ‘m sorry.” You whimpered. He cooed mockingly and brought a hand up to cup your cheek. 

“I know. And to think, if you would've been patient and not a greedy brat, you’d have what you want right now.” 

“Please! I said I’m sorry, what more do you want?” 

“Well I wouldn’t mind it if you’d start moving again.” He smirked, making your frown deepen. 

“Please, I’m sorry. I’ve learned my lesson, Jon. I won’t do it again, I promise.” When he remained silent, waiting, you whined loudly. “That’s not fair!”

“Now you’re gonna throw a tantrum?” He chuckled, making your cheeks flush with anger and embarrassment. 

“Please, Jonny.” You whimpered as tears filled your eyes. He stared at you for a moment, then closed his eyes with a heavy sigh, his grip tightening on your hips. 

“Jesus— fuck… You’re so fucking spoiled.” He swiftly turned you both over and you let out a startled moan when he immediately started rocking his hips, not going too fast yet. “I get you an apartment, an actual bed— and you can’t do the work for once?” Despite the fact that he was teasing, you still bit your lip and furrowed your brows, feeling bad. 

“‘m sorry, Jonny.” You said meekly, averting your gaze. 

“I know, little one. It’s okay.” He cupped your cheek and gently kissed your forehead, making your whole face heat up. “I know you can’t help it.” His thrusts sped up a little, rutting into you with more purpose now. “You get a cock in that pretty little cunt and you just get all dumb and come hungry.” You whined and turned your head away, embarrassed. With the side of your neck now bared to him, he leaned down, kissing and sucking the sensitive skin, being sure to leave marks. You were panting and moaning, pulling his hair as the pleasure consumed you. When he snaked a hand down to rub at your clit, you mewled and tugged on the strands even harder. 

“Fuck— Jon… please make me come.” You whimpered, hips grinding up into his hand. He trailed kisses up your neck to your jaw, then to your lips. You moaned into the kiss, clinging to him as he swallowed your sounds of desperation. “Please…” You whined against his lips, making him pull back just enough to look at you. 

“So fucking spoiled.” He muttered, rubbing your clit faster and fucking you harder. “Ready?” He asked softly and you nodded with a whimper. “Go ahead, baby.” Almost as if on command— but also because of the still unfamiliar pet name— your orgasm finally crashed over you. His movements never faltered, letting you ride it out, and your whole body shook as you clung to him. 

“Good girl.” He murmured, burying his face in the crook of your neck to trail kisses along the sensitive skin, making even more sounds leave you. Your walls tensed around his length, quickly growing overstimulated, but before it started hurting, he was letting out a choked moan and cursing under his breath. His hips stuttered before he finally pushed all the way inside, occasionally rutting into you. The stifled sounds that escaped him were sparking a new fire in your belly, but he was done after only a few seconds, much to your disappointment. 

He let out a heavy breath and lifted his head to finally look at you with a small smile. Your heart fluttered at the light blush dusting his cheeks and the way that he looked at you. You quickly grew nervous under his gaze and glanced to the side. 

“What?” You asked shyly and he shook his head, eyes moving all over your face. 

“Nothing. I’m just…” He cut himself off, then his expression became more serious and you stared up at him, trying not to let your anxiety consume you. “I like being here with you.” Your eyes widened and your whole face heated up. Biting your lip, your gaze shifted between his eyes as you tried to come up with a response. But you could see that if you stayed silent any longer, he’d get closed off or distant. 

“I like being here with you too.” You decided to say. 

Your heavy eyes fluttered open, trying to adjust to the overhead light— even though the bulb was pretty dim— but the haziness left instantly when you heard a soft noise from beside you. Jon was still asleep, brows furrowed and lips in a frown, and he was writhing a little, muttering something you couldn’t understand. Placing a hand on his arm, you gently shook him as you called his name, but he didn’t wake up. So you shook a little harder and spoke a little louder. 

He suddenly bolted up with a gasp and was panting as he frantically looked around the room. When you put your hand back on his arm, he quickly took it in a bruising grip and yanked it off of him, making you whimper in pain. 

“Jon— Jon, it’s me.” You said through a wince, trying to remove yourself from his grip. He suddenly snapped out of it and his hand went lax, allowing you to pull your arm away. He looked confused almost. Confused, but definitely scared. “Are you okay?” You asked softly as you rubbed the sore skin. 

“I’m fine.” He spat, trying to control his breathing as he looked anywhere other than you. You knew he wouldn’t want to talk about it so you didn’t bother asking. 

“Do you want me to stay here with you? Or do you just want some space right now.” He almost seemed caught off guard by the question and he took a moment to respond. 

“Stay.” He said it so quietly that if you weren’t waiting for his response, you probably wouldn't have heard it. 

“Okay. Would you still like to lay together or would you rather I not touch you yet?” 

“No- lay with me. Please.” 

“I can do that.” You gave him a small smile that wasn’t returned as you laid back down, hugging his chest and letting him snake his arms around your torso. Once you were settled, he grabbed your hand and lifted it to examine the red mark on your arm. 

“I'm sorry for hurting you.” He said quietly, pressing a soft kiss to the sore skin. 

“It’s okay. I shouldn’t have touched you when I didn’t know how you’d react.” You placed a soft kiss on his chest in return. “Do you want to talk about something to get your mind off it?”

“You’re not curious?” He sounded tired. 

“I am. But my curiosity is not more important than your comfort.” 

“Oh… Thank you.” He muttered, bringing your hand back down but intertwining his fingers with yours. 

“When’s the last time you laid with someone after having a bad dream?” You had a sneaking suspicion that his answer would give you all the explanation you need for why he acted this way. 

“Never.” Even as a child? You wanted to ask. But deep down you already knew the answer. Even without a psych degree it wasn’t too hard to deduce that most of his issues more than likely stemmed from his childhood. 

You tried to think of a response. Pity would just make him upset so an apology was out of the questuon. Should you joke about it to lighten the mood? Probably not the best idea… Ignore it and change the subject? You didn’t want to give him the impression that you don’t care though. 

“As long as you’ll let me, I’ll always be here when you wake up.” You decided to say. “If you want me to be.” 

“Why?” He croaked, tone full of an unusual amount of emotion. 

“Because I— I… care.. about you. And I have a feeling you’d do the same for me.” You shrugged, trying to sound nonchalant and not like you almost just confessed again. 

“I would do the same.” He confirmed, making the corners of your lips turn up. You wanted to tease him- call him a softie, maybe make a joke about how it’s obvious that he cares about you despite the warning he gave you, but you didn’t want to ruin the moment by saying something that would embarrass him. 

“It’s settled then. Next time either of us has a nightmare, the other will be there.” He let out a soft, breathy laugh in response and started rubbing light circles on your hand with his thumb. 

“Do you have nightmares?” You tried not to noticeably stiffen at the question. 

“No.” You shrugged, swallowing the lump in your throat. 

“Are you lying?” You could tell by his tone that he was genuinely asking. 

“I haven’t had one in a while so not really.” Technically that’s the truth. But you left out the part about how you frequently had nightmares over the past few weeks. 

“Since when?” 

“Jon, it doesn’t really matter, okay?” He stayed silent and you fought the urge to look up at him. 

“In Arkham?” He asked quietly. 

“What?”

“You had them in Arkham?” He clarified and you grew nervous. 

“And before.” That is also technically not a lie… You did have the occasional nightmare or two. When he remained silent again, your stomach churned. He’s probably going to start his whole “you have stockholm syndrome and don’t actually like me” rant again and you really don’t want to listen to that a second time.  

“I haven’t had one since we left. Honestly, it’s fine.” 

“About what?” 

“Jon,” 

“About what?” He said, more stern this time. 

“I’m not going to play into this and let you torture yourself.” You finally leaned up to look at him, finding his brows furrowed and lips curled into a frown. 

“You don’t need to. You not telling me is a pretty clear answer.” He wouldn’t meet your eyes and when he swallowed, your gaze shifted to the movement of his throat before going back up to his face. 

“Jon, please don’t do this again. Can’t we just… lay here together— and be happy?” He finally looked at you with an expression that was a mixture of disbelief, pity, and disapproval. “Please.” He looked away from you again and you watched his cheek tense as he clenched his jaw. When he started to slowly shake his head, you placed your free hand on his cheek, trying to stop him. 

“I don’t care about any of that! Why can’t you do the same?” You said, exacerbated. 

“You should!” His voice was much louder now, almost startling you, but you held your ground. 

“Well I don’t! I care about the fact that you’ll lay with me after I have a nightmare and that you call me stupid names you hate just because I like it.” He kept shaking his head so you continued. “I care about the fact that you wouldn’t let anyone hurt me, that you value my comfort enough to go out of your way to get this place.” You paused, taking in a deep breath, trying to ignore how scared you were for how this conversation would end. 

“And I care about the fact that you care about me. Nothing else matters to me, Jon.” You said softly. 

“I gave you nightmares for weeks— I hurt you. I…” He let out a shaky breath, clenching his jaw to suppress the emotion that was starting to show. “I don’t know w— I just… I wanted you to myself.” He all but whimpered, making you frown. You mulled his words over in your head, trying to think of the best way to approach this. 

“What if you do something to make up for it?” Honestly you didn’t think this would work, but you also had a feeling that he’d think being vulnerable with you could help push him in the right direction. 

“How could I possibly make up for raping and kidnapping you?” He scoffed, frown deepening. 

“You already have. But if it’s not enough, then why don’t you tell me about yourself?” You said, purposefully ignoring his word choice. 

“What?” He asked through a breath. 

“Tell me about your childhood, what made you decide on this career, your family, friends.” You shrugged, just trying to give him ideas. Honestly you didn’t need to know any of this. Sure, you’re curious, but you’re fine without knowing. This was just the best thing you could come up with because you genuinely didn’t need him to do anything, but you knew he wouldn’t let it go. 

“That will… make up for it?” He seemed equal parts solicitous and apprehensive. 

“You don’t have to, it was just a thought.” 

“That’s what you want?” He was still unsure and you started to feel bad for guilting him into this. 

“No, I just— I’m sorry I didn’t mean to pressure you like that. As I said, you don’t have to make up for anything, Jon. I mean it.” You could tell he didn’t believe you though. He didn’t speak as he examined your face, searching for anything to back up his suspicion that you were lying and you really did care. Eventually he just looked away from you with a small frown, thinking. 

You didn’t know what else to do to convince him or make him get over it. Sure he did those things to you, but you know your feelings are real because you had them when he was just your therapist. They weren’t as strong as they are now, back then it was just a little crush on the handsome doctor. You admired his intelligence and thought he was effortlessly funny, even though it didn’t seem like he realized it. 

“My father was a doctor.” He said quietly, making your focus snap back to him. 

“What?” It took you a moment to realize why he would’ve randomly said that. 

“He was a doctor and he primarily studied fear.” Already your stomach was twisting at the thought of where this was going. “He didn’t have any test subjects though… So he used me.” He shrugged slightly and your lips parted in shock. Even though you expected this, you still hoped you’d be wrong. 

“A few years later when I was a teenager,” His father did that to him when he was just a child? The thought made your chest ache even more. “I realized that if I could control fear, it would never be able to control me again.” The final piece to the puzzle that was Jonathan Crane. 

“The rest of my family wasn’t much better and I didn’t have any friends. Was there anything else I missed?” You blinked in shock, still trying to process all of this while simultaneously trying to come up with a response that wasn’t pity. 

“Honestly I wasn’t expecting your response to give me an actual explanation for why you are the way that you are, but it did. To a tee.” 

“You’re satisfied then?” 

“Well I’m a little sad to be honest but other than that yeah.” His brows furrowed in confusion and it truly baffled you how someone with a psych degree couldn’t understand your feelings. “Not that it wasn’t before, but all is forgiven now. Plus you’d be surprised how many good people only do bad things because of emotional and physical neglect and abuse so how can I even really fault you for any of that?” You shrugged. 

“Since when are you the psychologist?” He asked teasingly, his frown slowly lifting into a small smile. 

“I’ve watched enough Criminal Minds to know that.” 

“Criminal Minds?” 

“You haven’t watched that show?” You asked in disbelief. 

“I don’t watch tv.” He said simply and you gaped at him for a few seconds. 

“That might be the saddest thing you’ve said so far.” You feigned seriousness, but couldn’t hold in your laugh when his smile grew. 

“We can watch it if you’d like.”

“God no— There are like 15 seasons and plus, I don’t even know if you’d like it.” 

“15? Why do they need so many?” 

“I don’t know, it’s a popular show.” You shrugged. “Also I don’t know if you’ve noticed… but we don’t exactly have something to watch tv on.” 

“I’m aware. I’d buy you something.” 

“Or you could use your charm and get them to ‘donate’ it.” 

“I don’t think I’m a very good influence on you, little girl.” He said teasingly, but your cheeks heated up from his words. 

“What can I say? I want a tv. I haven’t watched anything in weeks.” 

“Is there anything else I can get you, princess?” Your eyes widened at the new name as you choked on your spit, making his smile turn into a smirk. Even though he was mocking you, the name still made arousal pool in your stomach. 

“Um… I- I don’t… No?” You replied, unsure. 

“There’s nothing else you want?” You bit your lip and shook your head, the fire in your face not calming down. 

“What about a book?”

“A vibrator?” You said at the same time as him, making his brows shoot up before he let out a loud laugh. 

“A vibrator? Do I not satisfy you, little one?” 

“N-no! You do! I just- it was stupid… sorry.” You mumbled, turning your face away from him. 

“Hm?” He gently guided your head back to face him and you let out an embarrassed whine, not wanting to continue. 

“It’s just different.” You muttered, flushing down to your chest now.  

“I see… Well, I don’t know how I could say no to that, especially when I’m so excited to watch you use it.” You choked on a gasp as your eyes widened. “When we get up I’ll give you some paper. Write a list of anything and everything you want. I’m sure the landlord will be more than happy to help us out.” 

“Are you crazy?! I’m not having the landlord buy a fucking vibrator.” You scoffed in disbelief, trying to mask your embarrassment. 

“Fine.”

“Fine?” 

He didn’t respond. Instead you just laid and talked a while longer, had a quickie, then got up to be at least a little productive. He had you write down the rest of the list to give to the landlord, then a few hours after the sun had set, he was taking you somewhere. 

“Are you sure we should be out in the open like this?” You asked, checking over your shoulder again. 

“No one should see us. Even if they do, they wouldn’t bother calling the cops.”

“But what about the vigilante?” 

“If he shows up, then you run. Do you understand?”

“I’m not just going to leave you.” You scoffed making him stop and turn fully toward you. 

“I will not tell you again. If he shows up, you run.” He said sternly, making you cross your arms over your chest. You could only maintain eye contact for a few seconds before huffing and looking away. “Do you understand?”

“Yes.” You muttered, rolling your eyes. 

“Good girl. Now hurry up, we’re almost there.” You only walked another two blocks before he was leading you in a store, making your eyes widen as you took in the contents. 

“What,”

“You said you wanted a vibrator.”

“I- I know, but— this is a sex shop.” You said weakly, the statement sounding more like a question. 

“Did you have somewhere else in mind to buy it?” He teased, making your blush intensify. Once he realized you wouldn’t be able to respond, he placed a hand on the small your back and guided you to the vibrator section. You stood there, staring at the various toys and blushing all the way down to your chest. 

“Which one would you prefer?” He turned to you but you kept your eyes forward, too nervous to face him. You knew which one you wanted… but you were too embarrassed to tell him. “Think about it. I’m going to grab a basket.” 

“A basket?” You asked as you turned to him, eyes widening even more, but he was already walking back toward the entrance. You stared at the various types and sizes, but your eyes kept drifting to a wand that was really similar to one you used to have. 

“Have you decided?” You jumped at his voice, not having heard him approach. 

“Um… That one I guess?” You said, pointing to it. He grabbed it and put it in the basket. 

“Any other ones?” You shook your head, biting your lip and trying not to get too overwhelmed from the embarrassment. 

“Okay. What else would you like?” You hummed in thought and walked around the store with him trailing behind you. Once you saw the lube, you paused in front of it and looked at him questioningly. “You want to try that again? It probably won’t feel as good as it did before.” 

“I still want to. If you do.” Instead of responding, he reached for the bottle and placed it in the basket, then you were moving on. 

The collars caught your attention, but you tried to act nonchalant as you made your way toward them. You eyed them longingly, but passed them by, too embarrassed— even after already adding lube and a vibrator to the basket. 

“Wait.” He suddenly said, making you stop and internally applaud yourself. 

“What?” You asked once you were facing him. 

“I want a collar.” He glanced at the shelf before looking at you again. 

“Aw, Jon, you want to wear a collar?” You smirked and he stared at you with a deadpan expression. 

“Cute. But let’s not pretend like your cunt isn’t aching at the thought of me leading you around by a leash.” Your smirk slowly dropped, but he wasn’t done teasing you yet. “I think we should get a name tag for it too, don’t you?” Your eyes widened at his words, suddenly feeling shy again. 

“Shut up.” You muttered, looking away from him with a blush. You examined the different collars, trying to pick one. “Can I get more than one?” 

“I’ll buy the entire store if that’s what you want.” Your blush intensified and you were completely caught off guard by the admission. 

Unable to respond, you just reached for a plain, black o-ring collar and tossed it in the cart, along with the matching leash. Next, you decided on the daintier, light pink choker. This one was lace and silk and had a small bow in the center. 

Walking around the store, you grabbed a few more things; metal handcuffs, a butt plug, candles and a lighter, and nipple clamps. When you got to the impact play section, you faltered. You weren’t lying when you told him you like being spanked. But when you look at a paddle, all you can think about is what followed after the last time he used one with you. 

“We can get one, but we don’t have to use it until you’re ready.” He said softly. You silently grabbed a paddle and placed it in the basket, only hesitating for a brief moment. 

“Can we look at the clothes?” You asked, changing the subject. He agreed and you walked across the store then looked through the different racks. “You were a professor right?”

“Yes.” You pulled out the tiny white, button down crop top and the even tinier, plaid skirt to hold against your body. 

“I’m not doing well in your class, professor. Is there something I can do to help my grade? I’ll do anything.” You said in an exaggerated seductive tone. He rolled his eyes but you could see the faint blush on his cheeks. “You’re totally into that aren’t you?” 

“It’s tolerable.” So he is… Good to know. 

It almost felt like you had an inside joke with him now and you smiled at the thought as you placed the outfit into the basket. You continued searching through the racks of clothes, almost giving up, but one item caught your attention. It was a pink babydoll dress with lace cups and a silk skirt. Fucking adorable. And it matched the choker too. You placed it in the basket and were about to walk away when he stopped you. 

“Wait. That one too.” He pointed to a red, lace bodysuit, so you chuckled and found your size before adding it to the almost overflowing basket. 

The walk home was uneventful. Jon wouldn’t let you carry any of the bags even though all of it was your stuff. The second you were inside the apartment and he locked the door, you threw yourself into his arms and kissed him. He grunted in surprise before reciprocating. When you pulled back, he tried to move forward, not wanting the kiss to be over yet. 

“Thank you.” 

“There’s no need to thank me. It was as much a gift for you as it was for me.” 

“Yeah, but still. I appreciate it. My ex never wanted anything to do with any kind of sex toy so it’s refreshing to be with a secure man.” You gave him a small smile, but stiffened once you realized what you said. “Not that I’m with you— I mean I’m technically with you physically right now, but” He kissed you softly, cutting off your rambling. 

“You are mine— no one else’s. Which means you’re with me.”  

“I don’t know… You haven’t even asked me out yet. Saying I'm with you seems like a bit of a stretch, don’t you think?” 

“Oh so now you care about labels?” 

“Maybe.” You shrugged. 

“Fine. Go out with me, little one. Be mine and mine alone.” He pleaded, making your heart flutter. “Let me be yours.” You bit your lip to hide the love sick grin that was growing. When you nodded eagerly, he almost returned the expression. 

Part 12

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[whatdoeseverybodywant]

I hope you’re having a good day! I wanted to request a fic with Jimmy (or jey, I love them both) where the mc is a bridesmaid at their sister’s wedding and she meets one of the groomsmen (Jimmy) and they start to really like each other. The sister warns mc that Jimmy is a playboy but things start to heat up quick between the two anyway! You can add or take away any aspects, have fun with it. Thanks, I love your writing!

The Bridesmaid - Jimmy Uso x OC

thank you @summerssoldierxx for the request. Sorry it took so long to get out. Hope you like it! 🫶🏽

I do NOT give permission for my work to be translated or reposted on here or any other site, even if you give me credit. DO NOT REPOST MY FICS

Reblogs, comments, likes, and feedback ALWAYS appreciated ❤ 

All OC Characters belong to me

Main Masterlist

“I thought it was against the rules to look better than the bride.” Summer Cooper rolled her eyes and let out a sigh as she turned to face her newly brother-in-law’s best friend. Jimmy or Jonathan - she was very confused about the two names - had been flirting with her since they met at the rehearsal dinner last night. And she was flirting back, heavy until her sister pulled her to the side. 

“Do not get involved with Jonathan Fatu okay.” Her sister Vanessa said. “He ain’t nothing but trouble and I won’t allow you to become another notch on his bedpost.” Summerhad never seen Vanessa look so serious before so she left Jimmy/Jon alone and ignored him the rest of the night. She was doing a good job at ignoring him during the wedding too, even though they walked down the aisle together. 

“Damn you ignoring me? I thought we hit it off?” Jon broke her out of her thoughts. 

“Listen.” Summer trailed off. “I’ve been told about you and your little games and I will not be another one of your victims.” She crossed her arms over her chest.  Summer furrowed her eyebrows because Jon actually looked hurt and shocked at what she said. 

“Oh ight. Shoot, my bad.” He said rubbing his hands together before walking away from her. She bit her lip as she watched him walk away from her. She quickly pushed him out of her mind and went over to her sister. 

“I seen you talking to Jon.” Summer rolled her eyes. 

“Yup. Told him to leave alone. Happy?”  Vanessa smiled and placed her hand on Brittany’s shoulder. 

“I’m only looking out for you.I don’t want to see my baby sister hurt.” Summer rolled her eyes and nodded her head. 

“I understand. You just looking out for me.” Summer forced a smile on her face. “Now go dance with you husband.” 

Summer laughed as she watched her nephew do his best TikTok dances on the dance floor. She picked up her champagne flute and took a sip as she looked around the banquet hall, the bitter feeling was back in her stomach as she watched all of the happy couples but once she looked at her sister and her brother - in -law she had a small smile on her face. That was what Summer wanted, someone who loved her unconditionally. And it seemed like every time she thought she found the one they wound up being complete jackasses who weren’t worthy of her time. 

“Who is that man and why does he keep staring at you?”  Summer furrowed her eyebrows as she looked in the direction her mother was looking and felt her heart stutter in her chest as her eyes met Jon’s. 

“One of Dontae’s friends.” Summer replied as nonchalantly as she could. She arched her eyebrow as Jon pushed himself off the wall and started making his way towards her table. 

“Hi i’m Jon” He said walking up to her mom and holding his hand out and Summer’s mom shook his hand. 

“Oh, you’re Jon.” Her mom said, causing Summer and Jon to furrow their eyebrows. Jon looked at Summer who held her hand up and shook her head. “I’ve heard some things about you.”

“Apparently, everybody has.” He said, his eyes still on Summer who rolled her eyes and picked up her champagne flute, taking another sip. 

“You wanna dance with me?”  He asked Summer and before she could turn him down, her mother spoke for her. 

“She would love to.” Summer shot her mom a look. “Summer Renee, don’t look at me like that. You might be thirty but I'm ya momma and will still whoop ya ass.” Summer shot Jon a glare as he tried to hide his laughter behind his hand.  She rolled her eyes , stood from her seat and walked away from Jon and her mother towards the dance floor.

She let out a huff as the DJ started playing a softer, slower song. Jon smirked and pulled her closer to him, taking her arms and wrapping them around his neck before wrapping his own arms around her waist.  

“So, what did you mean by you didn’t want to be another one of my victims.” Jon stated, getting straight to the point and instead of answering right away, Summer let her eyes wander around the room and stilled as they landed on her sister who was watching her and Jon dance. Summer shook her head and cleared her throat. 

“I’ve just heard some things about you and.” She paused and shrugged, “Listen, I like you and I’m not tryna get my feelings hurt. Okay..” She said averting her eyes from his.

Jon scoffed. “What makes you think I was going to hurt you? Like I told you earlier, I thought we really hit it off yesterday. I’ve told you some shit I aint even told my twin brother.” 

“Really?” She asked shocked and Jon nodded his head.

“Yeah, I’m not a liar, Summer.” She bit her lip and cut her eyes back over to her sister who was still watching them. Jon followed her eyesight and cracked a smile. 

“Ohh, your sister is the one who was talking shit.”  He let out a laugh. “Big sis  looking out for lil sis, I get it now. What did she tell you?” Summer shrugged and mumbled, 

“That you a playboy and that she wasn’t gonna let me become another notch on your headboard or something like that.” Jon bit the inside of  his cheek and nodded. 

“Wow. Aight, imma be completely honest with you right now.” He started and stopped dancing , so the two of them were now standing still while everyone else around them continued to dance. “I was married and got divorced about two years ago.  And in those two years, I’ve had sex with one person.” 

When Summer just arched her eyebrow in response, Jon sighed. “I told you I'm not a liar, Summer. I told you yesterday that I really liked talking to you. I ain’t try nothing with you, did I?” She shook her head. “Exactly, If I was a playboy wouldn’t I be trying to get you in my bed? Look,  You live here in Pensacola right?” She nodded. “Aight so fuck what ya’ sister saying and have breakfast with me tomorrow. Get to know me without having your sister in your ear saying how much of a bad person I am.” Summer bit her lip and nodded her head, causing Jon to flash her his pearly whites.

He pulled his phone out of his suit pants pocket. “Here, put your number in my phone.” 

Summer took it, but before she put her number in she looked him in his eyes. “Don’t make me regret this, Jon.”  Jon smiled and took her other hand into his own. 

“You won’t I promise.” 

Sorry, this took me so long @summerssoldierxx. I really hope you like it and if you have anymore request, send them in ❤️.

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@theesexystallion

[blushweddinggowns]

It had started as a rough few weeks. A rough few weeks that turned into a rough few months. It was weird, because in all honesty when it came to social standings, Will was doing a lot better here than he ever did in Hawkins. There were no Zombie Boy stories following him here, and he even managed to get a few girls to have a crush on him. He…still wasn’t quite clear how that worked out and he really wasn’t a fan of it. But they were also the only people he could talk to at school. He was way too paranoid of getting close to any guys. God forbid he got another crush on a friend, having none of them just seemed like the better course of action. 

It didn’t help that Mike had basically stopped acknowledging that he existed after they moved. He didn’t write to him, he didn’t call him, and it felt like the only time he heard his voice was when he politely asked for El over the phone. And it hurt. It hurt a lot. Especially when he still put in so much effort to get ahold of El all the time. He’d resent her for it if he could, but the only one who was having a worse time than him with the move was her. Maybe Mike was a shitty friend to him, but at least she had someone to talk to. 

But whatever. Lucas and Dustin cared, and so did Eddie and Steve. And when Jonathan wasn’t busy being high as hell, he had him too. Even Max called him more often than Mike did. Even when she was just trying to get ahold of El she’d take the time to ask him how he was, a courtesy that his best friend from freaking kindergarten couldn’t even offer anymore. 

So maybe Will didn’t have many friends in California yet, but he didn’t feel very lonely. 

Just a little heartbroken. 

But he could get past it. Especially when some of his favorite people were only one phone call away. Sometimes it made him feel a little guilty, that Steve and Eddie were his go to for talking about his problems. Especially since Jonathan was always trying to get him to open up. Even when he was zoinked out of his gourd he never failed to ask Will how his day was. Though…he did have a hard time following the plot when Will told him. 

But that didn’t change the fact that Jonathan always wanted to help. But what could Will say? I’m depressed because I’m in love with my best friend who doesn’t care about me? And oh yeah, I’m gay? Yeah, no. That wasn’t going to happen. If Jonathan of all people hated him for that…he’s not sure he could recover. But that doesn’t mean he didn’t think about it.

It was kind of pathetic, but he’d fantasize about it sometimes. Coming out to his family, everyone smiling and saying they’d love him anyway, no matter what. And if he was being honest with himself, it was technically possible, right? His brother had never said a bad word about Steve and Eddie. His mom never failed to shut the homophobic crap down when his crappy sperm donor had still been around. But it was different when it was your own kid, right? Will wasn’t quite sure. But he did know that he couldn’t stop thinking about it. 

So he called who he always did when he had a problem. It only took a few rings before someone was picking up, Steve’s familiar voice on the other end, “Hello?”

“Hey, it’s me,” Will sighed, flopping face first into his bed, the phone pressed to his ear. 

He could hear the smile in Steve’s voice, “Hey kiddo, what’s up?”

God, he was such a dad. Will wouldn’t be shocked if he started wearing socks with sandals by the time he hit twenty-three. He went straight to the point, “Do you think that living happily ever after is like a real thing? For people like us?”

Steve laughed, “It better fucking be after all the shit we’ve seen.”

“I don’t mean the Upside Down stuff,” Will sighed, “I mean like…y’know. The gay.”

Steve snorted, “The gay? I’m going to have to tell Eddie that one.”

Will rolled his eyes at the redundant statement. He had learned a long time ago that telling Steve something meant telling Eddie something, and vice versa. He sighed a tiny smile on his face, “Oh what, like he’s not already next to you listening in?”

“...touché.” 

Will laughed, turning over to stare at the ceiling, “I’m serious though. Like…is it even possible? It’s not like everyone gets to magically find their soulmate at eight.”

“Is that such a bad thing though?” Steve asked, “Because no offense dude but honestly? I think you could do a lot better than Mike-”

“Be nice,” Will interrupted, torn between being defensive for Mike’s sake and amused at Steve never failing to find a way to come at him.

“I will when he starts being nice to me.”

“Well that’s just not going to happen,” Will laughed, “I’m starting to think Eddie’s right to call you a brat.”

Steve gasped, loud and scandalized. He’d been hanging out with Robin too much, “Me?! Never!”

Will could barely hear it over the receiver, but he could hear Eddie’s faint voice coming through, Yes he is!

And it was making him laugh even harder. Will missed this, so much. He missed having a place where he could just say whatever he wanted, with no worries. Even now he was looking over his shoulder, anxious at the chance that his mom or a sibling could come bursting in at any moment to catch him in the act of being comfortable. It was a confusing and weird feeling, and probably a little unfair to assume they’d prefer him to be sad and quiet over happy and queer. But he still did.

But for now he was safe. And he might as well take the chance to speak on all the things he couldn’t with anyone else, “But what if I don’t want to do better than Mike? Like…it’s stupid but do you think that um, I would ever have a chance?”

The answer was a strong no, but sometimes Will just needed a reality check from someone else’s mouth. 

Steve sighed, “I think the odds are pretty low bud. All jokes aside, even if he was playing for our team, I’m not sure if he’s the type who could even accept it. Y’know?”

Will did know, unfortunately. And if he’d never met Eddie and Steve there was a solid chance he’d be that guy. The truth stung a bit, but it was necessary, “I know, I know. But…do you think he would accept me? If he ever found out?”

“He fucking better. Otherwise I’ll-”

Will heard a shuffle on the other end, paired with something that sounded suspiciously like whining before he heard Eddie’s voice, “Will? You there? Sorry about that. I had to take the phone away before he started talking about beating up a child.”

Will grinned, happy to hear Eddie’s voice, “You made the right call. Do you think they’ll ever get along?”

“Not in this lifetime,” Eddie sighed, “And I know Mike’s not perfect, but if he’s okay with us why wouldn’t he be with you?”

“But it’s different when it’s a friend, isn’t it?” Will asked, “I’m not even sure if my mom would accept it, let alone him.”

“Well first of all, you don’t have to tell anyone shit, okay? But I can promise you that Joyce would be fine with it. And so would Jonathan for that matter. And I don’t even know if El is aware of what homophobia even is.”

It all sounded a lot more believable out of Eddie’s mouth than what was going on in his own head. But still… “What if they don’t though? What if I tell them and they kick me out or something? Or make me go to therapy?”

“Okay, on the off, off chance that you tell them and Joyce suddenly became a monster overnight, we’ll go to plan B. Steve and I will drive up there to kidnap you and you can live in Indy with us.”

Will grinned. He could live with that, “Can’t we just make that Plan A?”

“No, because your family loves you, as they should by the way. And this won’t bother them, I swear. Plus, telling them on your own terms is a lot less awkward than getting caught in the act.”

Will didn’t even want to know what Eddie was alluding to with that one. Poor Wayne, “But what if we’re wrong?”

He wanted to believe him, he really did, but stranger things had happened outside of gay people being disowned. 

“Will, listen to me,��� Eddie said, his voice confident enough to make Will perk up, “I swear on Steve’s life, okay? There is no way in hell anyone in that house is gonna reject you for this.”

Will blinked, a little shocked at just how much faith he had in his family. More than he did, “Really?”

“Really. Trust me on this man, you’re going to be fine.”

They hung up pretty soon after that, mostly because El started knocking on his door for the phone. The conversation made him feel a bit better, but also…nervous. Could he really tell them? Would it all just work out? Just like that? Will wasn’t so sure. 

He decided against doing it right away despite Eddie’s own confidence. But he did start to drop a few feelers. He started with Jonathan, waiting until he was high enough for him to forget the conversation if it didn’t go well. And that wasn’t a long wait. 

He found him and his new friend sprawled out in his room, Fast Times playing in the background as they both stared into space. Though Will wasn’t quite sure he could count what Argyle was doing as staring. He’s eyes were barely open, and Will was 90 percent sure he was passed out. But that was good for him, now was as good a time as any. 

Jonathan smiled at him as he wandered in, his words kind but slurring, “Hey! What’s up? You never come in here. You wanna watch something or…?”

Will shook his head, his heart aching a little at the way it made his brother frown. Maybe he really had been neglecting him, too caught up in his own head to spend time with the closest thing he had to a Dad. 

It made him feel a little bad, but that wasn’t what he was here for, “No thanks. I just wanted to ask you something.”

“Sure!” Jonathan said, way too excited at the prospect of a simple question, but maybe that was the weed, “What’s up?”

Will shrugged, casually leaning against the door. Or at least he hoped it looked casual, because his heart was beating a mile per minute, “Steve said that his and Eddie’s anniversary is coming up soon. Do you think I should send them something?”

Jonathan tilted his head up to look at him, his eyes bloodshot with a tiny smile on his face, “That’s like…so nice dude. You’re always so nice. How are you so nice?”

“You don’t think it’s weird?” Will pressed, hope fluttering in his chest, “To be, y’know, celebrating them like that?”

Jonathan shook his head, “Nah man. It’s like…romance. Y’know? It’s sweet.”

“Yeah dude, gay guys are cool,” Argyle agreed out of nowhere, his eyes still closed,  “Good for Stu and Eggie. Gay people got like, the best hair.”

Will didn’t really know what to do with that one. But Jonathan was impressed. He jerked his head back to stare at Argyle, his voice in awe, “How’d you know he had good hair? I never told you he had good hair.”

“I bet they both have good hair,” Argyle sighed, “They alway do.”

“Are you like, psychic?” Jonathan asked, like that made any sense at all.

“Shit, you think I could be?”

Will watched as the two of them started to debate the idea, his brow raised. God, weed sure was a hell of a drug. He left them to it after that, deciding to slowly back out of the room. But he was going to chalk it up as a positive. 

preview for the next chapter (kind of) of this fic

[princelylove]

Dear prince,

I have come again because I cannot ignore your callings any further. (I'm the anon that requested the jotaro hcs and prosciutto with model darling) sorry they were a bit tame, I have so much I wanna ask but don't. Partly because I get so nervous and giddy while thinking of sending them and partly because I forget to.

Anyways, I've been thinking of sending you an ask about the more doting yanderes e.g. Bruno, Jonathan and whoever else comes into your mind with a little 'miss independent' darling. They get so offended and pouty when their captor tries to help them or do something for them, thinking it's an act of underestimation and thinking they aren't capable enough and have to be babied. (How will the yanderes handle this? Maybe even a bit of brat taming?)

– 💝🪤 darling

There's no need to be shy about it. I'm fairly happy to humor requests, even if they're on the tame side. I do wish I'd receive some odd ones, though. Variety is fun.

Wellll. Do you like to be restrained? Because this is like begging to be given less and less privileges, assuming their darling is already safe and sound in their 'home.'

Bruno loves you a lot. He wishes he understood what he's doing wrong- spouses are supposed to relax when their man is home!

He gets fairly frustrated early on. It's agitating, if he's being honest. Bruno doesn't know how to punish this kind of behavior- his instinct is to bend you over his knee and make you count how many times he spanks you, but that's probably just going to give him more problems long term. You won't relax in front of him if he's hit you before, and the goal is to make you want to roll on your back for him...

Maybe he can't hit you, but he can scold you. Bruno exists to help you, please just let him handle the dangerous things, even if it's just cutting up some fruit. Knives aren't a joke!

He goes through a few stages before he lands on proper scolding. First, he tries to bribe you. Then, he tries to reason with you.

"Come on, amore. This is for your own good. What can I do to help you through this?"

Since neither of those work, it seems he has no other option than to chide you.

Jotaro wishes you would just shut up and behave. You're such a pain in the ass sometimes, you know that? He regrets how he handled taking you home. Maybe if he were nicer, you wouldn't behave like a spoiled brat that acts out for his attention.

Yeah, he's fully convinced it's an attention thing. You're just fucking with him. Obviously you're pouty and whiny because he's been busy lately, so... sorry. He'll be around more, ok? No need for all of this whining and screaming and crying shit, it's annoying as hell.

Yeah, sure, you can take care of yourself. He's not doing that. He's checking you. You're not a baby, sure, he never said you were. Can you just lift your shirt up already? He needs to check for bruises again.

You can expect any verbal resistance to be met with.... verbal resistance. Jotaro is unsurprisingly quick witted, and can be pushed a little before he starts to find it annoying. He'd prefer you to be docile and happy about it, but Jotaro can see a little back and forth as fun. Maybe. It depends.

When you really piss him off and aren't cooperating in the slightest, he's less fun about it. His ability to stop time comes in handy when his favorite brat thinks they can get away with not humoring his paranoia checks. If you're not going to play nice, Jotaro will just violate any sense of privacy you were clinging to before this. Fine, ok. Make him be the asshole because you don't want to do something simple like let him see your arms or stomach.

He offers no comfort afterwards, because he didn't do anything wrong. Maybe if you listened to him, you'd understand. The house rules aren't up for debate.

... Yes, he still wants to sleep with you tonight and to tuck you in nicely. That isn't up for debate either.

[hellfire--cult]

Baring Teeth {Eddie Munson x Fem!Reader} - Ch. 12

Edit of Eddie: pitifulbaby

Chapters: Masterlist (Go here to see list of chapters, plotline and general warnings.)

Pairing: Eddie Munson x Fem!Reader

Tropes: Enemies to Lovers, Non-Traditional Omegaverse, Slow burn, Modern!AU, Mechanic!Eddie

⚠️This chapter contains: Angst, billy x reader, nervousness, eddie crying

wc: 7.6k

A/N: Sorry for taking so long! and oof... next chapter is where everything goes coo coo

Anyways, Enjoy! ❤️ And don't forget to always support me by hitting the reblog button or leave a comment!

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CHAPTER 12

It started out of a pure mistake.

Your phone dinged with a notification from Instagram, a direct message from… You looked at the screen with an eyebrow raised up in confusion as you saw Eddie’s username and then ‘sent a video’. You haven’t talked privately with him since Jonathan's. Why would he send you a video? You put down your glass of wine on the counter and opened the message to see he sent you a meme.

You snorted loudly when it was a compilation of screaming cats with screamo voices from metal bands. At the third cat you threw your head back in laughter and then another ding caught your attention, getting out of the video with a smile on your face, small giggles escaping you as you kept remembering the screams. 

“I DIDN’T MEAN TO SEND IT TO YOU”

That explains a lot. You snorted again as you double tapped the video to give it a like, to then reply back to him.

“I laughed so I forgive you 😆” 

“Oh, so does it mean we have the same sense of humor Peach?”

“Don’t get your hopes up Munson.” 

But the asshole was right, and the memes he sent to you made you laugh each time, and it came very apparent that you two did share the same sense of humor. You sent a few memes back to him, and then it was a back and forth thing, just memes being exchanged. 

So now, you were giggling after a full week of just sharing videos with Eddie as you stirred the onions on your pan to start preparing lunch. You had the wooden spoon on one hand, and the other was holding your phone as you looked at the new video Eddie sent you with the words ‘This was us.’ And it was a video of two corgis just barking at one another aggressively and non stop, one on the couch, the other on the floor.

Spot on.

“What are you laughing about?” You heard Billy ask as he walks into the room with just a pair of sweatpants on, drying his hair with the towel, shaking it all over his curls. You turned your head as you kept giggling, showing the video to him. 

“My friend sent me a funny video.” You say and the word friend sounds quite too much for someone like Eddie Munson, but it would be difficult to explain the relationship to Billy. Your boyfriend leans to see what you were showing to him only for him to tilt his head in confusion and then back at you.

“Why are they being that aggressive with each other?” Right, he doesn’t know the context of why you were laughing, so you put the phone away as you shook your head.

“It’s just funny to me.” You reply to him and in all honesty, Billy and you didn’t share the same sense of humor. He liked… dark humor. You weren’t going to deny that one joke here and there made you giggle or snort, but he liked heavy dark humor, and about topics that didn’t make you that comfortable, mostly about ho–

“Oh, you’re making pasta baby?” He asks with a smile to his face as his arms wrap around your waist from behind and you feel like melting under his touch, a smile spreading on your lips. 

“Yes I am.” You say proudly to him, and he nods as he puts his chin on your right shoulder as you keep steering the onions on the pan, waiting for them to turn into a golden color. 

“My friends loved you by the way.” Your breathing hitched slightly at that. You met his friends yesterday at one of their luxurious apartments, and it was just a few people, not that many, and you were happy to see Billy expressing himself with his friends and to see him in that new light. You were sort of relieved you had caused an impression on them…

Even if they didn’t cause one on you.

Billy’s friends were really narcissistic. Everytime you said something about your job, they always repeated the same thing: ‘You wouldn’t have it if we didn’t model’. 

You wanted to rip Tommy Hagan’s head off.

Then Heather Holloway kept pestering you about getting her a column in your magazine so she could get more deals with important brands and the worst part is that Billy didn’t acknowledge any of it. He didn’t see the problem of what his friends were saying to you, nor what they were asking for.

So you didn’t tell Billy how uncomfortable you were at that place, not that he actually asked you what you thought about his friends. It’s okay, your opinion didn’t matter really, they were his friends and he wasn’t going to change them for you. You didn’t want him to do that of course, and you wouldn’t ask for that in a million years because you just weren’t like that at all.

“Really? I’m glad.” You say with almost a bitter tone, hoping he wouldn’t catch it, but of course, you were wrong.

“You didn’t like my friends?” He asks you as he lifts his head from your shoulder and you sigh, shaking your head.

“It’s not that, I just now met them. Can’t really say I like them or dislike them.” You say to him without taking your eyes off the pan in front of you. You didn’t want to start an argument right now, and much less today when it was Billy’s turn to meet your friends. 

“Hmm…” He replies back and you clench your eyes knowing that he was already mad. This is another side Billy has. Whenever he is mad he simply shuts off and he is the one that decides when the argument or fight is over. 

“I told you yesterday that some comments made me uncomfortable. I don’t share their same humor, so it’s just a matter of getting used to it.” You cringe at your words because it was the last thing you wanted to do, but you needed Billy to be in a good mood today. You wanted him to be in a good mood. You heard him sigh as he pressed his chin against your shoulder again, making you sigh out of relief.

“Yeah, I know… They are a lot to take sometimes.” He chuckles at his words and you melt at his voice. You wiggle in his arms as you laugh from how his stubble is tickling the bare skin of your shoulder.

“C’mon, get me the tomato sauce and put water in a pot.” He laughs at you and lets go of your waist to follow your instructions but then you jump up with a gasp as a loud smack could be heard across the room. 

“Don’t order me.” He says to you in a hungry tone as he rubs your right ass cheek before walking towards the cupboards. You shake your head at him as you hear another ding of your phone going off. 

It must be another cat meme.

You were nervous.

Scratch that. Really nervous.

You didn’t know where else to clean to calm your nerves. These were your friends, they don’t care at all how everything looks, but you were just fidgety. What if Billy doesn’t like them? What if they don’t like Billy? What if there is an uncomfortable moment at one point? What if your friends don’t include him in conversations, or what if Billy starts a topic no one is interested in and–

“You okay?” Your boyfriend asks as he walks into the living room with a nice black flannel, his hair tied up into a small bun, freshly shaved but keeping his distinctive mustache on, and you were hit by his fragrance which already made you melt away in the matter of seconds. You walked towards him and wrapped your arms around his neck to then dive your nose in the crook of your neck, making him chuckle as he held you close. “Needy?”

“Very much.” You pulled away to look at him. His blue eyes locked with your with a warm smile on his lips, and put a strand of your hair behind your ear. 

“Now, why were you pacing around the room like a crazy person?” He asks you and you cannot help but bite your lip in embarrassment, sighing at your mind for being the bitch it was being right now.

“I just– I want you to like them and I want them to like you too, and, you’re the first boyfriend I introduce to them and I–” He cut off your rambling by placing a small peck on your lips and pulling away with a grin on his lips.

“Everything is going to be fine.” You take a deep breath at his words and you nod slowly at his reassurance. He takes a moment to look all over at you, a smirk appearing on his lips. “Though… I mean, we can always postpone…”

You rolled your eyes at him, giggling at his idea as you shoved him lightly by his shoulder. You were wearing a nice simple short black dress, thin straps over your shoulders and some low heels. It was a little formal for your friends, sure, but you felt like being an extravagant host today. You shake your head at your boyfriend who was still smirking at you with a wiggle of his eyebrows.

“No, they should be here at any–” The doorbell rings and you raise your eyebrows up in surprise, looking at the door and then back at Billy. “Minute.”

“Spooky.” Billy says with a roll of his eyes and you squint at him as you take a deep breath to walk towards the door. This is it. This is another barrier you will break with Billy. Another step that solidifies your relationship even more than before. Your hand grips the handle of the door and finally opens it to reveal five people smiling at you with drinks in their hands.

“Wassup amiga?” Argyle is the first one to greet you and you giggle at his excitement. You move aside to let everyone in, and you frown when you see Steve, Jonathan, Nancy, Robin… No sign of Eddie.

It’s not like you invited everyone personally, one by one. You just sent an invitation to the chat group you're all in and he didn’t say either yes or no, but somehow you were expecting him to be here tonight. You closed the door once Robin finally walked in as she wiggled her eyebrows at you. You turned to find everyone introducing themselves to your boyfriend with big smiles on their faces. You sighed with relief as you walked over to them and stood next to Billy.

“So, Billy, are you taking care of our girl?” Steve asks and you send him a murderous stare. Out of them all, the one you were scared the most of making things awkward was Steve, and here he was, not even ten minutes in your home and he was already making stupid questions. Billy frowned as his cheerful face fell for a second to a more somber one.

“I am.” You frowned a bit at the change of Billy’s tone and Steve noticed it too, making him start to open his mouth again, only for Jonathan to interrupt him.

“Baby, don’t strangle the guy with questions already.” Billy’s ears perked up at Jonathan’s voice and looked in between him and Steve.

“Baby?” He asks and you jump up in realization, making Billy look at you in confusion.

“Right, Jonathan and Steve are going out with each other and…” You look at Robin, raising an eyebrow up in question, and she just looks at Nancy and wraps an arm around her shoulders, making the curly headed girl blush an intense red.

“And we are in the works of it!” Robin cheerfully says and you giggle at how Nancy acts around Robin. She is usually cool and even when she dated Jonathan in the past she always looked like she was the calm one while Jonathan always blushed in embarrassment. 

“Well, Robin and Nancy are in the works of going out.” You giggle and look back at Billy and your face fell as he looked at your four friends who were in their own world as they talked to each other with smiles on their faces.

There wasn’t a smile on your boyfriend’s face.

“I am a lone wolf.” Argyle was standing next to Billy with two beers in his hands and your boyfriend looked at the long haired man and then down at one of the drinks. He took a bottle and immediately took a long sip of it, making you frown with worry. Was he upset you didn’t tell him before about the relationships in your group? Maybe if he’d known he could have started some type of conversation first?

You ordered some pizza for everyone, except Billy who had prepared some salad for himself that afternoon. He didn’t want to eat flour two times in the same day. You understood that because he is a model after all, and he often does it when he is with you. You would eat a burger while he ate grilled chicken and veggies. Or you would eat fried chicken while he ate an omelet and a salad. 

“Don’t you want a slice?” Robin asks him again, just to make sure and Billy could only give her a small smile as he shook his head.

“No, I’m good.” 

“You can tell me to fuck off if you want, but don’t you have cheat days? Or–” Robin continues and you want her to shut up, you really did. At this point Billy hadn’t talked that much and just let everyone be and often listened to some conversations, so you just assumed he was mad at something that happened, or something you did.

“I don’t forbid myself from eating… It’s just that today we ate pasta for lunch, so that would already be my cheat meal of the day.” You didn’t want to think badly of your boyfriend, but the way he responded to your friend, almost annoyingly, had your skin crawling for some reason. Robin seemed to get the picture and gave you just one glance before going back to the pizza.

Your nerves start setting in as you realize that… your friends do not like Billy, not asking him any more questions or even including him in conversations… but your boyfriend doesn’t like your friends either, messing with his phone as you all shared stories about one another and he didn’t even ask questions about their jobs or how they all met each other, or anything to get to know them. 

You clenched your jaw and you excused yourself as you stood up and walked towards your coffee table to retrieve your cigarettes and lighter and go into your balcony, shutting the blind behind you. You didn’t know when the night went so wrong, you couldn’t pinpoint it, but the anger against Billy was slowly rising each second it passed. You didn’t like his friends at all, but still made small talk with each of them even if you cared shit about their life. You made the effort and he isn’t even trying. 

You lit a cigarette and took a long swig of it as you took your phone out of your dress pocket. You looked behind you to see Billy talking to Argyle, and it seems he is the only one that actually got a conversation out of your boyfriend. You shook your head and looked down at your phone again, and you sucked in your cheek as you went to Eddie’s direct messages with you.

YOU: Why didn’t you come?

You send the message as you blow the smoke out of your lungs. You look out into the city with a frown on your face, still trying to think of why everything went to shit. Your phone dinged after a minute and you looked at the screen to see Eddie messaging back.

EDDIE: Maybe you didn’t stroke it well.

You snorted at the answer and almost choked on the smoke. You shook your head at how immature he was and typed back to him.

YOU: What are you, ten?

EDDIE: Inches? Not even close.

“Oh for fuck sake.” You say out loud this time with a suppressed laughter. The fact that he was replying fast meant that he really wasn’t doing anything else, so the question popped up again and you typed it out to him. 

YOU: Why didn’t you come to my house?

EDDIE: Didn’t think you’d want me there.

You frowned at the answer until you remembered that you and Eddie only bonded a week ago after a year of going at each other's throats. And the fact that you only bonded through memes made the friendship even thinner. You licked your lips as you took another swig of your cigarette and you sighed as you typed your answer.

YOU: Well, glad you didn’t, it’s a shit show.

EDDIE: What do you mean?

YOU: They don’t like him, he doesn’t like them.

You were becoming teary eyed each word you typed out and you took a deep breath in to keep the tears in, and another drag of the cigarette went into your lungs.

EDDIE: Seriously?

YOU: Yep. I don’t know why, but fuck, I hate that he is not doing the same thing I did for him.

EDDIE: Explain?

YOU: His friends suck Eddie. They are fucking stupid, and the most insufferable people ever, but I at least made conversation with them, not show my distaste in their faces.

It felt good to let all of that anger out, even if it were to Eddie, but somehow it felt right. You turned to see what was going on inside, and you could see Billy talking with Jonathan now. You could only guess that Jonathan was doing his best to include Billy into the group, but from your boyfriend’s face you could see that it wasn’t working.

EDDIE: Sorry sweetheart, but your boyfriend sounds like a dick.

YOU: He isn’t. I don’t know why he is acting this way.

EDDIE: Maybe talk to him afterwards? See what his problem was or is?

You sigh at his response and you were already planning on doing that, but you would have to wait until everyone is out of your home to do so and your anxiety was eating at you to know what was going on in your boyfriend’s head. 

YOU: Was planning on doing that. I know the rest don't like him because he is being unlikable right now.

EDDIE: Damn, if I were there I would make his night a living hell, just talk his ear non stop. 😝

You snorted at that knowing Eddie would definitely bug the shit out of Billy if he were here. You sighed, wishing that Eddie had actually come and were doing exactly that and maybe, just maybe, the tension wouldn’t be as thick as it is now. 

YOU: Sorry for ranting out to you.

You bit your lip at your message. You really didn’t expect to go into Eddie’s messages to actually talk to him about your feelings right now, but for some reason you felt he was the one you had to talk to at the moment, someone who wasn’t in the scene that was happening inside your home. 

EDDIE: It’s alright, I don't mind it.

You took the last puff out of your cigarette as you put it out in an ashtray that was on the little table in your balcony. You gulped as you looked at your screen, fingers hovering over the letters. Would it be too much? Would it be too forward? Well, he was the one that followed you first last time, so might as well have the same amount of balls that he had.

YOU: Okay, but I prefer phone messaging rather than instagram DMs.

EDDIE: Is this your way of asking for my number?

YOU: Is it working? 👀

You wondered what Eddie’s face was behind his screen, your heart racing a little in nervousness, feeling as if you were overstepping this new relationship you two had, but the message you received made you smile again.

EDDIE: Surprisingly, yeah

You were washing the last bit of dishes as you heard Billy tidying up the room, putting the chairs back in place as well as the couch and throwing away the pizza boxes. He hasn’t talked to you since everyone left ten minutes ago. You put the last glass on the drying mat and then dried your hands with a kitchen towel. You turned around to see Billy turning off the TV and you crossed your arms over your chest.

“What happened?” You asked him and he looked at you with that same blank look he had all night.

“What do you mean?” 

“You… You didn’t even try to socialize with my friends, and whenever they did try to talk to you, you replied in the most… disgusting of ways.” You replied to him and he sighed, shaking his head at you.

“I didn’t sound like that.” And you rolled your eyes at him, which made him frown at you.

“It did. You acted like a jerk all night! I didn’t like your friends either, but I at least tried to get to know them!” He scoffed at your response and paced around the living room as he kept shaking his head. 

“So? We have different ways of acting towards people we don’t like.” What? 

“You disliked them from the first moment you saw them! I at least got to know them first! How do you dislike someone without knowing about them?” You knew your voice was elevating itself, gradually, and Billy wasn’t talking in his same low tone either.

“Oh for the love of– I don’t care what you did with my friends. I don’t have to act the same way you do.” This was the first ever big fight you had with Billy, and you weren’t liking where it was going at all. Your heart was breaking slowly as you stared at him.

“Then… If I don’t like your friends, but I do try to keep it civil… And you don’t like mine but you don’t even put a single ounce of effort… Then what’s the point Billy?”

At that, Billy finally stopped his pacing and turned to face you. He inspects your face and his shoulders relax when he sees a tear rolling down your face and his heart was about to jump out of his throat. He didn’t want to lose you, not because of this. He sighed and started to slowly walk towards you.

“You’re right. I should have… tried a little harder.” He almost winced at his words, but he really didn’t want to leave you because you were the best thing that has happened to him in a while, and if he had to make a small sacrifice to keep you, then he would. “I just, didn’t feel connected to them so I–” 

“It’s no excuse… I didn’t feel connected with your friends either, but you didn’t see me grimacing at every single thing they said!” You yell out and he clenched his eyes in frustration, giving a nod towards you and you felt your heart racing and something deep in your gut was telling you something was wrong. Something isn't adding up but you couldn’t pinpoint what it was.

“You’re right, you’re right, you’re right… I promise I will make the effort next time…” He tries to tell you and you are listening to him but the tears were filling your eyes as you remembered how badly he treated your friends. You cover your face with your hands, and all you could think about was that it felt too good to be true. Billy was too good to be true. Something had to happen for this happiness to shatter into pieces sooner or later. 

He came rushing to your side, getting hold of your cheeks into his hands, trying to lift your head up in order to look at your teary eyes, his heart breaking a little bit more because he was the reason for them. He sighed and pulled you into a tight hug, kissing the top of your head.

“B-Billy…”

“I promise, I will do better… I don’t want to see you get hurt, so I will get my stupid personality a kick in the ass for you.” You couldn’t help but giggle into his chest as he talked, a smile breaking on his lips at the sound. He pulled away from the hug but kept you close with his arms still around you. “Seriously though… I’m sorry, and I will apologize to your friends as well.”

“Oh…” Your heart melted at that. You didn’t really expect him to apologize to your friends, but here he was, offering it completely. You smiled up at him and got on the tip of your toes to land a soft kiss on his lips, in which he smiled into. “I would like that… Thank you…”

“Anything for you sweetness… Anything.”

And he really meant anything.

The next time he met your friends he apologized to every single one of them, telling them he didn’t have a good day, which was a lie, but he just didn’t want to upset them. Argyle immediately wrapped an arm around Billy to cheer with him as he started telling him about everyone and how they met. 

You were really grateful to have Argyle in your group.

You knew he didn’t like Billy either even though he was the most talkative with him, but it didn’t mean he was pleased with the way he treated your friends and how he treated you. Argyle now was the one that is trying to mend the group back like a bandaid, and it is slowly working as Billy listens intently to each of your friends. He was surprised to know that Jonathan had dated Nancy before Steve, and now Nancy is dating, or going out, with Robin. 

He also found out that there is a missing friend in the group. A friend you’ve been talking to for the past week through messages. 

After the successful night with Billy and your friends, you were headed towards the mall to actually get some new foundation and maybe a new mascara as well. But of course, everything couldn’t go to plan because your lovely car had started making a really weird noise. You were afraid of driving any further and you wanted to at least leave the car at a mechanic’s so that you wouldn’t have to wait for a tow. 

You bit the inside of your cheek and you shrieked when smoke started coming out from the side of the front of your car. Your eyes widened when you spotted a mechanic’s shop in the corner of the street and you were begging your car wouldn’t explode as you rode it towards the entrance of the shop. When you killed the engine, the car made a ‘poof’ sound and you got out of it to go to the front. 

You winced when you still saw some smoke going up and you knew you would burn your hand if you pulled the hood up without a glove. You turned and saw the Shop’s name, making you scoff at your luck.

‘Munson’s.’

“Just my luck.” You say and you walk over to the door and stare at the doorbell but then you see the garage’s door slightly open and you look around to check if there was anybody outside. You slowly walked over to it and pulled the door open, stepping inside the modest shop. There were car parts hanging on the sides, a car in the middle with the hole at the bottom to fix it, cranes. 

You made an approval nod to all of it as you scanned the room, actually impressed by Eddie’s shop. You didn’t think it was like this at all. You believed it was a shop in the middle of the dirt with the walls made of cheap steel and wood. But you were met with concrete, cement floors, the appropriate emergency fire extinguishers and the exit signs beaming in red. 

“Hello?” You muttered, but heard no response at all. If the door was open, someone must be in here, right? You stop in your tracks. What if there was a robber? What if you just walked into a burglar breaking in? Oh, fuck, shit! You turn on your heel to make a run for it only for a deep voice to stop you.

“What the fuck are you doing here?” 

Your eyes widen, stopping you completely from bolting away and you turn around to find Eddie, leaning against the doorway of an office, arms crossed and… his eyes are red. Glossy even. Had he been crying? Did something happen to him? 

“I uh– My car… It just… poof?” You were at a loss of words, completely. He blinked at you a few times, shaking his head in confusion. 

“Poof?”

“Poof.” He stands there, mouth agape as he stares at you. Were you serious right now? 

“Okay, rewind a bit with me–”

“Have you been crying?” You ask out of nowhere and he stills again. He licks his lip as he looks away, clearing his throat.

“Is your car outside?” His low voice made you take a step back and realize the boundaries you still had with one another. You look down at the floor in shame, your stomach turning a bit.

“Y-Yeah… I managed to drive it here… Smoke came out.” You say in a small voice and Eddie looked at you again, sighing and heading over to his table to put on some gloves. He then grabbed a tool box and walked out of the garage, you following right behind him. You didn’t know how to interact with Eddie in person. It was different from talking on DMs or text messages, and him giving you a cold shoulder was not helping your nerves.

He popped the hood of your car and he coughed as black smoke came out, fanning all around and you stepped back, covering your face with your arm in order to not inhale any of that smoke. Just what the fuck happened to your car?

“I realize now what you meant by ‘Poof’.” He says with a chuckle and a cough, and you almost sigh of relief as he breaks the ice for the both of you. You walk over to him, still covering your mouth and nose with your hand.

“Yeah, it was making a weird sound and it suddenly, literally, did Poof and then it exploded as I put the brake here.” You try to explain the best you can but you’ve never seen anything like this happen to your car before. He tilts his head and leans forward to check on something.

“Who put in this battery for you?”

“Uh– I think Rick’s–”

“It’s a rigged battery.” Your mouth falls open as you look down at it and back at Eddie.

“What do you mean?”

“He sold you, what he claimed to be, a brand new battery from a known supplier most likely… This is just… a cheap off brand battery.” He finishes and you stand there shocked, looking at him. You were scammed!? What the actual hell!? Fury engulfs you as you curse at the sky.

“Jesus fucking christ!” At your curse, Eddie chuckles and you couldn’t help but sigh. You hadn’t slept that well and now you couldn’t get the foundation you needed at all and the beers you were going to drink to relax at home by yourself.

“I just know Rick. He rips people off.” 

“This was the last thing I needed today.” You scratch your forehead in frustration as you look at your car. “Did it break anything else?” Eddie leans forward and puts his hand in to start checking the rest of your car carefully, and he hums in approval.

“No, thankfully. Just the battery exploding, but the cables might be busted as well.” You groan to the sky and you lean back onto the wall of his shop while looking at your busted car. You cursed at nothing because your pay might have to go all the way into the car now, fucking amazing.

“Great… I just wanted to go get some foundation, maybe a purse, go home, have some wine and relax in my solitude and now.” You finish by banging the back of your head on the wall in complete defeat. Eddie took off his gloves, inspecting you, and then sighed.

“I may not have wine, but I do have some beers inside.” Your eyes almost widened. This would be your first private gathering thing with Eddie. Alone. Just like you sometimes do with Steve, or with Robin. But you were tired, not wanting to overthink it, so you simply nodded at him. He guided you both back into the shop and then into his kitchen area for him and his workers. You looked at the nice fridge, the microwave, the coffee pot, the utensils… Eddie had everything for his colleagues.

“Wow… I didn’t think it would look like this.” You see Eddie opening the fridge with a frown to his face as he takes two beers out, closing the door and looking at you.

“I take offense to that. Did you think my shop was trash or something?” He asks and you shrug, taking the beer out of his hand and you couldn’t help but smirk at him.

“Maybe.” He only shook his head at you, opening his can and taking a sip out of it. He walks out of the kitchen area and then heads up on some stairs you didn’t see before. You frown in confusion until you reach another door on the second floor, and he opens it up to reveal his office, where all the archives of his clients are, a desk in the middle, computer atop of it, and it was all decorated with posters and car parts. “Holy fuck…”

Eddie looked at you and he almost spat his beer as he saw the amazed yet confused expression on your face. You really thought his shop was just a garage with some tools. He also thought it was like that, until inspections came up and he had to start upgrading everything with a kitchen, emergency exits, fire extinguishers, first aid kid, and even having CPR lessons for him and his workers.

“I take that, once more, as an offense.” He walks over towards his desk, grabbing onto his chair and pulling it at front with the other one he has. You were still amazed, looking around as you slowly sat down on the chair, absentmindedly taking another sip of your beer. He scoffed at your reaction and sat down in front of you with a huff.

“Well, this is a… huge surprise to me.” Your eyes go back to look at him and he shakes his head as he takes another sip of his drink.

“Took a while, but I got it right.” You nodded in acknowledgment and looked down at your hands as you kept drinking your beer. Eddie could see there was something in your mind, he could sense it even. “What’s on your mind?”

“I just– You didn’t come last night either.” You looked up at him, and he was frowning at you in doubt.

“I… something came up.” He softly says and you noticed the twitch of his eyebrows and he hid it by taking a long sip of his beer. What was going on in his head?

“Well… Yesterday went smoother… Billy talked with everyone, gladly…” You inform him in a cheery tone and his eyes meet yours, a small tug of his lips on the side.

“Told you he would make things right.” 

After that night where you DM’d Eddie about the situation with your group and your boyfriend, your conversations escalated to private messages. You were looking for advice on how to make the night go smoother, and how could you know if Billy actually liked your friends or was faking it.

He explained to you that no man would fake something like that. If his dislike is apparent, he would have made it known by now since he got to know them a second time. Billy got to his senses of his bad behavior and he redeemed himself and asked for forgiveness to your friends instead of you, and that says a lot. 

“Yeah… I just hope that it’s real.” Eddie can still sense the doubt in yourself, in your boyfriend. He doesn’t have any advice for that, other than she should just trust Billy. 

“I bet it is, but you can’t expect them to become besties who talk about their dicks in just one night.” Your eyes widen at that and you look at him who had a smirk on his face, waiting for your response.

“I bet you would make it your job to make him uncomfortable if you ask something like that.” You giggle at him and he chuckles, giving you a nod. This interaction didn’t feel strange at all. It felt natural, funny, as if you were talking to a long lost friend that you never lost the trust in. 

“Of course! That’s why I can’t wait to meet him next time we all get together.” Your excitement grew at that. He was formally accepting the next invitation you give him to meet your boyfriend. You smiled at him and took a sip of your beer. His eyes locked with yours for a second and he shifted in his seat as he took another sip himself. Your smile faded and you inspected his face as he looked at the top of his can. Your curiosity was winning the best part of you, and you bit your lip, hoping that you wouldn’t go over the line.

“Why were you crying?”

Eddie’s breathing stopped at your words. For some unknown reason, he felt his chest start to put pressure on his lungs, his throat closing in as his guts turned with anxiety. He gulped the lump in his throat but he could already feel his eyes burning. Why were his walls crumbling so easily with you? It shouldn’t be this easy. It shouldn’t happen this quickly, not after the whole year of despising each other's guts thing. 

“I don’t…” And you realize that you may have stepped on a line that you don’t have the right to, at least not yet. This is a territory maybe Steve can go into, but not you. 

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t ask something like that–”

“It’s my Uncle.” 

You freeze at that and you keep your eyes on his face as he keeps looking at the top of his opened hand. His uncle… it couldn’t be… He talked about his uncle two weeks ago, how could it be possible?

“What… happened?” You were afraid of asking, really afraid, but you didn’t want to assume the worst.

“He had a stroke yesterday. That’s why I couldn’t go to Robin’s.” He finishes saying and you can see him clutching onto his can. Your heart beats in pain for him, not knowing you feel this way with him, but maybe you two were meant to have this friendship all along, and that’s why it’s natural, that’s why you felt his pain, and his sorrow at this very moment.

“Eddie… I’m so sorry…” You raised a trembling hand up towards his which was resting on top of the desk that was next to you both. He flinched slightly at your touch and you almost drew back from him, but you were surprised when he gently got hold of your fingers with his. 

A year ago you would have never guessed this is where you would be standing with Eddie Munson today. Never imagined you would be holding his hand, tenderly, in order to console him as you see his eyes fill with tears, threatening to spill out.

“He is fine… I just had to drive to Hawkins to sign some papers… But…” He winced at how weak he is feeling. He didn’t intend to break down in front of you, hell, he never intended for it to happen ever in this lifetime. He feels your fingers holding his even tighter, and the first tear slips out of his eye. “God, I am just… not ready to face it all alone.”

You couldn’t believe what you were hearing. You always saw Eddie as this strong, big and intimidating man… but now you realize he is the same as everyone else. He can cry, he can be afraid, he can do good, as well as bad… Your heart sank at his words, and you shook your head at him.

“No… No, you aren’t alone.” You try to talk to him but he simply shook his head and his eyes locked with yours. Brown eyes, filled with water, showing you a pool of sadness behind them.

“He is the only family I have… There’s no one else.” He saw how your eyes became watery as well, and he sighed as he tried to swallow another hard lump down his throat. You exhaled a shaky breath, putting your can on top of the desk so you could grab his free hand with both hands in order for him to pay attention to you.

“You are not alone… You have more family. Steve, Nancy, Robin, Jonathan and Argyle…” You didn’t dare to say your name. You don't really think that you deserve to be in that spectrum of Eddie’s life, even if he is telling you about it. “And they are all going to be there for you, no matter what.”

Eddie kept looking at you, frowning in his eyebrows, and your eyes were still locked with his. He felt fire in his hand at your hold, but it was something warm, something inviting. He felt safe with you. That’s why he could be vulnerable right now, that’s why he would let the walls fall down. He didn’t care anymore that they did, and he wasn’t going to question it either. 

“You know what Wayne asked me when he could talk to me again?” He suddenly says and you tilt your head.

“What?”

“That I put my shirt on backwards.” Your eyes widened at him and he suddenly snorted, wiping his tears away. “I was in such a hurry that I put my shirt on backwards. I didn’t even put socks on and I mismatched my shoes as well.”

You couldn’t help but let out a snort of your own at the image that came to your head. He started laughing alongside you, feeling his chest slowly decompress from the anxiety and pain he was feeling from yesterday, remembering that small moment with his uncle, that even in his worst state, he still manages to rile Eddie up in some way to show him that he is still kicking.

“Well, he does seem like he still has many other things to say to you.” You smile up at him and he just stares at you in amazement. Is this what platonic soulmates were like? Like Robin and Steve? He stared a bit at your face and then down at his hand which was still being held by yours. You followed his gaze and a deep blush spread on your cheeks as you pulled away and got hold of your beer can again.

“Um…” He cleared his throat. “I have batteries here, and the cables. I can probably have it fixed by tomorrow.” 

“Huh?”

“Your car that went poof.” He chuckles at the word and you bite your bottom lip to hold in a smile. 

“Thank you. You don’t have to do that on a weekend, really.” 

“I just guessed you needed it for work on monday.” Your heart definitely thumped at that. You looked up into his eyes and he was gazing at you with a look you couldn’t quite describe, but it wasn’t uninviting, or evil at all. It was kind and understanding.

“I– Yeah… thank you.” You reply to him and he gives you a nod, taking a long sip of his beer can and putting it on the desk. 

“I’ll tell you how much it is later. I’ll text you, alright?” You quickly nod at him, finishing your own beer and placing it next to his can on the desk. You stand up from the chair and he does the same but gets hold of your shoulder to stop you from walking.

“Huh–”

“You didn’t say your name.” You blinked at his words in complete confusion. He sighed at you and continued. “When you mentioned everyone else, you didn’t include yourself.”

Oh… 

“W-Well… I didn’t think it was my place yet… to include myself in there.” You humbly say to him and he understands your doubts but–

“Well, we’re friends now… right?” Your heart stopped at that and an immense happiness rushed through your body. You didn’t think you would be this delighted to be his friend, but here you are, almost jumping up and down at the new category you have in his life.

“Yeah…” He just kept looking down at you, a soft smile on his face and you felt your knees buckling a little bit at his brown eyes. You cleared your throat and decided to change the mood. “Do friends get discounts?” You wiggle your eyebrows at him and he chuckles, pushing you away by the shoulder he was holding.

“So you’re becoming my friend to get benefits from me?” 

“And beer, don’t forget the beer.”

End of Chapter 12

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[dwobbitfromtheshire]

"Oh, and I guess what you did was okay?" Nancy asked.

"No, I never said that," Jonathan replied.

"He had every right to be pissed," Nancy replied.

"Listen, don't take it personally, okay?" Jonathan said. "I don't like most people. He's in the vast majority."

"You know, I was actually starting to think you were okay," she said angrily.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. I was thinking, 'Jonathan Byers, he's not the pretentious creep everyone thinks he is,' " Nancy said.

"Well, I was starting to think that you were okay. I was thinking, 'Nancy Wheeler, she's not just another suburban girl who thinks she's rebelling by doing exactly what every other suburban girl does. . .until that phase passes, and they marry some boring one-time jock, who now works sales, and they live out a perfectly little boring life at the end of a cul-de-sac. Exactly like their parents, who they thought were so depressing. . .but now, hey, they get it,' " Jonathan spat.

Jonathan felt like he had just slapped himself and Nancy. His insides went cold as Nancy looked at him in annoyance. He could see the hurt flash behind her eyes as well. What the fuck did he just say to her? God, he was a pretentious creep and an asshole. That was something his father would have said. He scoffed and stepped back, turning away from her. She did the same as they continued walking through the woods. And that's when he heard it. It was so quiet, it was hard not to. It was a sniffle. Nancy was crying or trying not to.

"I'm sorry," Jonathan said.

"Whatever," Nancy said.

Her best friend was missing. It was just as hard for her as it was for him, he remembered. Jonathan gently grabbed her arm, and she yanked it out of his grasp. Nancy turned to him. She was trying not to let the tears come.

"I really am sorry. You didn't deserve that. Especially the part about your parents. I shouldn't have thrown that in your face," Jonathan said.

"No, you shouldn't have," Nancy said, crossing her arms. "You're a dick."

"Yeah, that's true," Jonathan said. "I'm not proud of what I said. That's something my dad would have said to my mom, and I always hated him. I try so hard not to be like him. He ends up coming out anyway."

"I get that," Nancy said, her features softening.

"I shouldn't have taken those pictures. I was completely wrong for that, and Steve had every right to break my camera. I would have been even more fucked if she had gone to the police and my mom was left to pay for it. . .but that doesn't matter. I had plenty of time to stop taking those pictures, and I pushed my brother to the back of my mind when I saw you in the pool. . .when I saw something that I tried not to pretend I didn't want to be a part of. I say I hate people, but really, I hate the fact that I feel so alone, and when I saw you with them. . .I was jealous. You weren't pretending to be anyone else. If anyone was pretending, it was me. Pretending I didn't want to have friends, pretending that there was anything artistic about those photos. . .the only thing they were saying was that the boy behind the camera was lonely, and there was a part of him that wanted to have fun like you were having fun. Now, I'm a crazy boy in the woods, rambling and crying," Jonathan sniffled. "I'm sorry."

Nancy stared at him, her anger completely gone now. She no longer held that furious protective stance.

"Maybe you're not a pretentious creep like I though you were," Nancy said softly.

"No, you were right about that," Jonathan said.

"Well, maybe after this, we can fix that," Nancy said. "All of it."

Jonathan wasn't sure what she meant by that, and he was afraid to find out. It got a little crazy after that. They continued to search for the faceless creature, whatever it was, in the woods until it got dark. They found a wounded deer in the woods. Nancy had assumed that it had gotten hit by a car. Jonathan decided that it would be smart not to point out that they were in the middle of the woods. He didn't have long to think about it before the deer was yanked away, and shortly after that, he lost Nancy. He ended up pulling her out of a tree, and the hole he pulled her out of had closed behind her. Jonathan had held her tightly after that and made sure she got home safely. Nancy had looked so shaken. He had to make sure that she made it into her room. It had been scary for him, but it had been even scarier for her. She could have died tonight. He put a sweater around her and then his arm. Somehow, he found himself lying next to her in her bed. If she hadn't looked at him with those eyes of hers, he would have happily taken the floor.

"I don't want to be alone," Nancy had said, and Jonathan had folded.

It was awkward, lying here next to her like he hadn't thought about it a million times over. After everything, he shouldn't feel a little bit of hope building up inside of him.

"We don't really know each other, do we?" Jonathan asked.

"I think because our brothers are friends, it feels like we do," Nancy said.

"Do you think - do you think that we could be friends?" Jonathan asked.

"Yeah, I think so," Nancy said.

It was the most he had ever spent with Nancy, only having watched her from afar like he's done with everyone else. It was easier to keep everyone at arm's length when he had his camera, but now he didn't. He had no excuse not to be vulnerable or honest with Nancy or try to push her away. He was definitely odd, no doubt about that, and maybe that's why he didn't try to put himself out there because people wouldn't understand him or his taste in music. Maybe pushing them away first before they could hurt him would be easier on him, right?

"I think I liked it when he broke my camera," Jonathan said, breaking the silence.

"What?" Nancy asked.

"I don't know why, but when he looked at me as he dropped it. . .that's weird, right?" Jonathan asked.

"I mean, I don't know. . .I'm not sure I'm the right person to judge on what's strange or not," Nancy said.

"It's like. . .it's like he could see through me for a moment. . .I know why he did it. . .he did it out of anger, but for a moment, it seemed like he knew I needed to let go of it," Jonathan said. "I think I'm just reading into things again."

"Well, I don't think he should have broken it to do that," Nancy said.

"Yeah, maybe, but like what I said in the woods. . .we all say and do shit we don't mean in the heat of the moment," Jonathan said.

"Well. . .we're teenagers. . .it's the most confusing times of our lives," she replied.

"I've been using it like a crutch, anyway. I've spent so long looking through that lense that I've gotten a narrow view of people. I've forgotten that there are more to people than just what I see in an image of them, a brief glimpse of their lives," Jonathan said. "I want to remember what it's like to be a photographer because sometimes it's so much more complicated, and sometimes, a picture is just a picture. . .I forgot where the line was."

"And sometimes, a girl just wants to fuck a boy," Nancy said and Jonathan burst into laughter. "Jonathan! Shh! You're going to wake my parents."

Jonathan stuffed his face into his pillow, and Nancy giggled quietly.

"We should probably get some sleep," Jonathan said.

"You're right," Nancy said. "Goodnight, Jonathan."

"Goodnight, Nancy," Jonathan paused and closed his eyes. "It was incredibly hot, too. . .him breaking my camera. Shouldn't have found it hot, but I did."

The next day, it wasn't quite so awkward with Nancy. Although, he was annoyed that his father was still loitering around. He knew it was because of some scheme of his and that he was only here to benefit himself, to squeeze whatever he could out of the situation. He tried not to show it, but Nancy could tell. It cheered him up considerably when she told the man behind the counter that they were monster hunting. The look on his face. . .it was so ridiculous. He didn't even bother asking anymore questions. Jonathan suspected he didn't really care, just glad to get customers. He was glad that Nancy didn't ask him about what he had let slip last night as he was falling asleep. If she had heard him, he couldn't tell. He was about to bring it up when some asshole in a car mentioned seeing her movie, and that's when they saw it on the Hawk. All the Right Moves starting Nancy the Slut Wheeler.

It was all a blur after that. Nancy discovered Steve, Tommy, and Carol at the scene of the crime . Steve revealed that he had witnessed them getting all cozy last night. It had been a well-deserved slap from Nancy even though Jonathan had known that it was Tommy and Carol holding the evidence. Steve hadn't stopped them. What could Nancy have said? She had been attacked by a monster, and that's why Jonathan was comforting her? Steve hadn't known, and it was easy to jump to those conclusions with the photos and everything. . .it was the only thing that made sense to a teenager. Nancy had said that they're teenagers, and it was the most confusing time of their lives. Steve had turned on him then.

"You know what, Byers? I'm actually kind of impressed. I always took you for a queer but I guess you're just a screw up like your father," Steve had said. "Yeah, yeah, yeah. That house is full of screw ups. A bunch of screw ups in your family. I'm not even surprised by what happened to your brother, I'm sorry to have to be the one to tell you this, but the Byers, their family, it's a disgrace to the entire - "

Jonathan had clenched his jaw, refusing to look at him even when he had shoved him. He tried so hard to ignore what he said, his words from the woods swimming in his ears to remind him that he was an asshole too.

"Well, I was starting to think that you were okay. I was thinking, 'Nancy Wheeler, she's not just another suburban girl who thinks she's rebelling by doing exactly what every other suburban girl does. . .until that phase passes, and they marry some boring one-time jock, who now works sales, and they live out a perfectly little boring life at the end of a cul-de-sac. Exactly like their parents, who they thought were so depressing. . .but now, hey, they get it,' " Jonathan spat.

Yeah, teenagers. . .they're all assholes. It was weird that he had acted just as defensively as Steve had. Steve had screwed up, and instead of apologizing, he had insulted Jonathan, like Jonathan had insulted Nancy. Maybe it was the fact that Jonathan was struggling with his own attraction to Steve, to Nancy, on top of his missing brother and strange monsters, but it was all too much for Jonathan. He whirled around and punched Steve.

He kept on punching him, and Steve fought back, throwing him to the ground, pressing his body against his. Jonathan flipped him, throwing another punch as he straddled his thigh. He could vaguely hear Tommy and Nancy screaming at him. Jonathan felt his stomach get warm. Can you still be attracted to someone and also hate him? No, Jonathan had nothing in common with Steve Harrington, and it was stupid of him to think that he did. When did Steve stop fighting back? Jonathan paused and looked into his eyes. Steve wanted Jonathanto hit him. Before Jonathan could question it further, someone was touching him. He reacted on instinct and swung. Fuck, it was a goddamn cop.

"You act like you're all alone in this world, Jonathan, but you're not," Joyce reminded him. "You're not."

His mom had been right. He had risked his life and Nancy's. He just wanted to save Will so badly, and he was so used to doing everything on his own. It wasn't his mother's fault. It was just the situation they were in. They had no one else to help them out. Lonnie only ever "helped" when it benefited him, and it usually never did. There was nothing like a scolding from his mother to remind him that he was still just a teenager trying to act like he was an adult. His mom did the same thing, though, didn't she? Act like she was all alone in this world? Maybe he was more like his mother and less like his father than he thought. He had been just as determined to save Will as she had been, and maybe that's why she was so worried. There's nothing like watching a piece of yourself running around in your jeans to scare the hell out of you. As he hugged his mother, he couldn't help but smile into her shoulder.

"I want to finish what we started," Nancy said. "I want to kill it."

And suddenly, they were in his house, preparing to kill the monster, the demogorgon, so Hopper and Joyce could go into the Upside Down to rescue Will. Jonathan hated leaving the kids, but he hated the idea that Nancy would be facing the monster alone. So, they left them. Of course, he didn't factor in Steve Harrington showing up to apologize and then to help. He wasn't surprised when Steve left, a little disappointed, but not surprised, and then he just had to come back in. . .he had to be gallant and brave. . .like a fucking prince out of a storybook. He had the hair for it. Just like that, he felt a wave of affection for the man, which he tried to deny over and over again since Steve picked up the bat.

"This is stupid," Jonathan muttered.

He was standing outside of Steve’s house. After spending two days by Will's side, Jonathan decided that he should really check on Steve after beating the shit out of him, especially since Steve risked it all to save his life. He wanted to check in on Nancy, too, but after what happened with Mike and the "agents" showing up to her house, she was on lockdown with her family. He couldn't get the look in Steve's eyes out of his head. . .when Jonathan had him on the ground and Steve had stopped fighting back. Steve had wanted him to hit him because he had realized what he had said. . .what he had done. Much like Jonathan had come to the realization that he had been a dick to Nancy as soon as those words had come out of his mouth. Jonathan liked to pretend that he was better than other people, but was he really? Who was Jonathan really punching in that alleyway? Steve or himself? He was tired of all the introspection. Jonathan had turned around to leave when the door opened.

"Jonathan?!" Steve yelled.

He turned around to find Steve looking frazzled. He was holding the bat in his hands. His hair was wild, his clothes were in a state of disarray, and it looked like he hadn't slept.

"Uh, hey," Jonathan said.

"Is something wrong?" Steve asked. "Is it Nancy? Oh god, it's back."

"What?! No, man, relax," Jonathan said. "I just wanted to check on you."

"I'm fine," Steve said.

"Clearly," Jonathan said dryly, and Steve snorted. "I just felt bad about, you know, hitting you."

"I deserved it," Steve said.

"You deserved one but not me nearly killing you," Jonathan said. "You look like shit."

He really did. His bruised face was definitely worse than it had been before. One of his eyes was swollen shut and his other eye had been fucked up by the rings that Jonathan had forgotten he had worn. His lip was split.

"Thanks, man," he said. "Look, I'm really sorry for the shit that I said. None of it was true, and it was really shitty of me to say all that, especially with everything that had been going on."

"Yeah, it was really shitty of you but it's not like you're the only one that's fucked up. I wasn't particularly nice to Nancy when she cornered me about the photos," Jonathan shrugged.

"So, we're both assholes," Steve scoffed.

"Pretty much, but you know, what teenager isn't?" Jonathan asked. "It's hard enough, but to add all this on top of it. You can't really know how you're going to react in the moment. . .in any moment. I think we all surprise ourselves."

"Yeah," Steve said softly.

"I think we both know that Nancy deserves better than that," Jonathan said. "And I think we both deserve better than to act like that."

"I don't want to be like my father," Steve said.

"I don't want to be like mine, either," Jonathan replied. "I'm sorry about the photos."

Steve smiled a sort of crooked smile, his hazel eye lightning up genuinely. He still looked dead tired, though.

"You want to hang out?" Steve asked.

Jonathan had another realization. Steve looked tired because he hadn't slept because no one was here, and Steve didn't want to be alone.

"Uh, where are your parents?" Jonathan asked.

"Oh, they extended their trip, which means that Dad fooled around again, and he has to make it up to Mum," Steve said.

"You call her 'mum'?" Jonathan asked.

"Well, she's British, so. . .," Steve said.

"I didn't know that," Jonathan said.

"Most people don't. She moved here when she was young," Steve said.

"So, you're alone?" Jonathan asked.

"Yeah, it's nothing that I'm not used to," Steve said. "So, do you want to hang out?"

It hit Jonathan to the core. He had convinced himself of that so many times that he was used to feeling alone and that it wasn't a big deal. His mother had no choice, not really, but Steve’s mother did, and she chose his father over over him. Jonathan was so grateful to Joyce then for choosing him and Will over Lonnie. Jonathan hoped she'd come to the realization that both her and Steve deserved better than that. Maybe there was still time for that, and Jonathan wanted that for Steve.

"I mean, I wish I could, but I wasn't planning on leaving my brother and mother home alone for long," Jonathan said, and then he had a thought. "You want to hang out at my house?"

"Yeah! Yes!" Steve exclaimed.

There was a huge sigh of relief as Steve’s shoulders relaxed. It must have been terrifying all by himself over here with no one to call, not even Tommy and Carol anymore. How paranoid did he get? Did he feel like something or someone was watching him? Did he jump at every shadow? It probably hadn't helped that Jonathan had lurked in the bushes, taking intimate photos of Nancy in Steve's bedroom. While Jonathan had nightmares, he also had his mother and brother. Nancy and Mike couldn't tell their parents what happened, but they knew enough to be there for their kids. Steve didn't have anyone.

"Goddamnit," Jonathan cursed.

"What? Did you change your mind?" Steve asked.

Jonathan shook his head. He didn't try very hard to deny his attraction to Steve, but he could feel stirrings in his chest. He was developing feelings for Steve Harrington. God, he was such a hypocrite. Although he had apologized now, he was the suburban girl who thought she was rebelling.

"No, I just remembered something. You ever not like something because everyone else likes it, and then suddenly, you tried it now you're starting to like it," Jonathan said. "I was just thinking about that."

"Hm, yeah, totally. Everyone I knew liked pineapple on pizza, but I thought it was, like, I don't know. . .blasphemy?" Steve asked. "But then I tried it, and I realized it wasn't as bad as I thought it was. What were you thinking of?"

"Mushrooms," Jonathan blurted out, blushing.

"Oh, I love mushrooms!" Steve exclaimed. "Alright, I'm ready, let's go!"

"You don't have shoes, man," Jonathan laughed. "Or pants."

"Right," Steve said.

"You should probably pack a bag, too. I don't think my mom's going to let you leave when she finds out that your parents are gone," Jonathan said.

Jonathan expected to see cartoon dust clouds in Steve's wake as he had taken off so fast. He came back just as quick with the nailbat still in his hands along with a bag. He was flipping his keys in his hands. Jonathan noted that he was quite eager to leave the house. Maybe it was the mixture of bad memories: his parents leaving, the monster that prowled in the woods, Barb dying in his pool. . .Jonathan understood why he wanted to leave. His house wasn't much better, but at least there were more people there. Jesus, he looked exhausted. Jonathan grabbed his keys.

"Hey!"

"You are not driving in your condition," Jonathan said.

"I'm fine," Steve said.

"We're taking my car," Jonathan said.

He helped Steve into the passenger seat and threw his stuff into the back. Jonathan slid into the driver's seat and found Steve smiling at him. God, this is not what he came over for.

"Thanks for doing this," Steve said. "I didn't want to be alone."

"None of us did," Jonathan said, and he took Steve’s hand as he drove off.

Why the hell did he take Steve’s hand? Jonathan focused on the road. He didn't want to let go, and neither did Steve. At the next stop light, he looked over at Steve and found that he was fast asleep. His entire body had finally relaxed when he felt safe. He felt safe enough with Jonathan to finally fall asleep. Jonathan squeezed his hand and drove to his house. He hated to wake Steve, but he couldn't carry him inside. He gently woke him up and Steve smiled softly at him, blinking sleepily. He rubbed his eye and yelped. Jonathan tried not to laugh and helped him out of the car. With Steve's bag in hand, he pushed Steve gently into the house.

"Hey, mom! I brought home a stray!" Jonathan called out to Joyce.

"Asshole," Steve said affectionately and Jonathan laughed.

"Again?!" Joyce asked from the hallway. "You haven't done that since you were four and you thought that baby opossum was very ugly kitten. . .Oh, hey, Steve."

"I made a friend," Jonathan shrugged as if it was no big deal.

"Okay, you brought home an opossum, and you thought it was kitten? That's adorable," Steve said.

"Shut up, I was four," Jonathan replied. "Mom, you don't mind if Steve stays here for a little bit, do you? His parents still aren't home, and I'm pretty sure he hasn't slept in a couple of days."

"Of course," Joyce said. "Where are your parents?"

"I don't know, they were in Boston for a conference, but my mom walked in on him with another prostitute again so he's making it up to her," Steve shrugged. "They extended the trip, I don't know for how long this time, they usually tell me."

"How often does this happen?" Joyce asked, looking at him in concern.

"I'm used to it," Steve shrugged and Joyce's frown deepened.

"Well, if Jonathan wants to, you can sleep in his room," Joyce said.

"Are you sure? I don't want to be a bother," Steve said.

"You saved my boy, you can stay as long as you want," she replied, touching his arm softly.

Jonathan watched as Steve's eyebrows furrowed and he could almost tell what he was thinking. Joyce could too. Is what a present mom is supposed to be like? Joyce squeezed his arm, looking at him in sympathy. Suddenly, there came a loud bark, and Chester came barreling into the living room. He nearly knocked Steve over.

"Chester!" Jonathan exclaimed.

"Puppy!" Steve laughed and collapsed onto the floor. "Oh, my dad never let me have a dog as a kid. I've always wanted one or a cat. I'm not picky. Oh, he's so cute."

"Chester, calm down a little bit," Jonathan laughed as his dog licked Steve’s face.

"Oh, he's just trying to make my owies feel better," Steve giggled as Chester licked his face.

"Yeah, we thought for sure that the Demogorgon had gotten him, but he ended up finding his way home," Jonathan said.

"He's smart, he knows how good he has it," Steve grinned.

"Well, why don't we get you to bed, I'll wake you up when food's here," Joyce said.

Jonathan made sure that Steve got into his bed and threw the blanket over him. Chester had immediately jumped up on the bed and snuggled into Steve's side. It didn't take long for Steve to finally fall asleep. He walked out of the bedroom and went to check on Will, who was also taking a nap. He stared at him for a moment, thankful that Will was alive and safe. Jonathan found his mother in the kitchen, and he hugged her tightly.

"Have I ever thanked you for always fighting like hell to be here for us?" Jonathan asked.

"No," she replied.

"Thank you," Jonathan whispered. "I'm glad we have you."

Jonathan couldn't bear the thought of not having Will or Joyce in his life or Nancy and Steve now. He always thought that he wanted to be alone, but maybe what he was afraid of was making an actual connection with people. Now, he was afraid of losing it all, especially Hopper.

"I love you, honey," Joyce said.

"I love you, too," Jonathan said.

Steve had settled in pretty quickly. Jonathan could tell that he had loved it here and that everyone else loved having him there. It was eventually time for them all to go back to school, and Steve was still staying with them as his parents were still not back. Jonathan had been right; Joyce hadn't wanted him to stay on his own. She refused to let him leave, and Steve was determined to help out. As they sat around the breakfast table, Will had to speak up.

"Mom! If we keep Steve, does that mean he'll be our brother?" Will asked.

"Oh God, no!" Steve and Jonathan exclaimed.

"I mean, maybe you as a brother but I definitely wouldn't want to call Jonathan that," Steve said.

"Why?" Will asked.

"No reason," Steve said blushing.

"Will, sweetheart, eat your breakfast," Joyce said and she smiled knowingly over at them.

Will looked suspiciously at them for a moment before dropping bacon on the floor for Chester. After breakfast, Steve walked out the door with the Byers. He was less surprised when Joyce hugged him along with her sons. It wasn't like the first time when he had frozen up for a moment.

"Are you sure about going to school?" Joyce asked.

"Mom, I can't stay home forever," Will said. "I want to go to school."

"Okay, but if you need anything, call me, okay?" Joyce asked. "Steve and Jonathan are right next door if you need them."

"Yes, mom, I know where the high school is," Will said in amusement. "I just want to get back to normal."

"Well, you can't rush these things, okay," Joyce said. "And it might not go back to the way things were after what happened."

"Mom," Will sighed. "I'll be fine."

"It's just so soon," Joyce said.

Will hugged Joyce tightly and slipped into the front seat of Jonathan's car. Steve gladly entered the back seat, waving at Joyce as he did so. Jonathan blasted the radio, the three of them singing loudly with the music. Steve sang very off-key on purpose, making them all laugh. Jonathan knew eventually that Steve would have to go home, but he hoped it wasn't anytime soon, but at the same time, he wished that Steve’s mom would come to her senses. From what he told Jonathan, there's still a part of Evie Harrington that could be a good mom. . . If she just let Richard go. Steve really loved his mother. Jonathan loved having him here, and Will loved having him here. He fit so perfectly, and maybe that was because there was a part of Steve that was like Jonathan.

"He'll be okay," Steve said.

Jonathan was leaning against his car, watching Will walk off with his friends.

"I know, I can't help but worry," Jonathan said.

"You are your mother's son, which I think is so cute," Steve said, and Jonathan blushed. "Look, you have a free period. Maybe they'll let you check on him. And I have a free period, and I'll check on him, too."

"Can't do that forever," Jonathan said.

"Well, no, but Will's smart enough to understand that it's going to be weird for a while," Steve said and nudged his shoulder. "Hey, Nancy's coming this way. . .how's my hair?"

"Perfect as usual. . .how's mine? Wait. . .I don't care," Jonathan muttered.

"Yeah, you do," Steve said in amusement. "And your hair always looks good."

Nancy approached them, looking surprised to see them together.

"Steve, did you come here with Jonathan?" Nancy asked.

"Yeah, we're friends now," Steve said with a goofy grin. "Plus, I'm staying with him and his family right now. Jonathan was worried about me."

"I showed up to his house, and he hadn't slept for two days," Jonathan said. "I had every reason to worry!"

"You didn't?" Nancy asked.

"Yeah, I got scared and paranoid. I jumped at every shadow. Jonathan took me home with him," Steve said with a smile.

"Yeah, the nightmares have been awful," Nancy said. "Your parents still aren't back?"

"Nope," Steve rolled his eyes. "It's better this way. I'm grateful to Jonathan for letting me stay with him. I made sure to show my appreciation the next morning in bed."

"You - you did?" Nancy asked, her eyes wide.

"What?"

"Steve, think about what you said," Jonathan whispered.

"Oh! Nancy Wheeler, get your mind out of the gutter," Steve grinned. "I made Jonathan breakfast in bed. I also made some for Joyce and Will."

"I wasn't - I mean - ," Nancy said, blushing.

"It's okay, Nance, I would have gone there, too," Steve said, winking at Jonathan.

Jonathan's blushed deepened as he thought about all the times he woke up in bed with Steve, curled up in his arms. Now, as he gazed at Nancy, he suddenly wished that she had been there, too.

"So, your parents finally released you?" Jonathan asked, changing the subject.

"Yeah, I didn't think they ever would," Nancy scoffed, rolling her eyes. "Especially Mike. They didn't appreciate him hiding a girl in their basement, but they're surprisingly not too hard on him. I think they've both picked up on the fact that he's upset about something."

"Can't imagine losing the first girl you ever really liked," Jonathan said and stared at Nancy.

"I'm trying to be there for him, but I don't know how," Nancy said.

There was silence between them all, as they thought about everything that occurred. They stared at each other, gazing into each other's eyes. No one knew what to say or do about any of it, but maybe they could figure it out together. They didn't have to have all the answers right now, but maybe they didn't have to be alone while they searched for them. Nancy slipped her arms through Steve and Jonathan's as they walked into the school, ready to face whatever came their way.

[moonsun2010]

I'm mad Tumblr ate my anon asks (it's not appearing in my Drafts????) but luckily I have a copy saved to my email so:

HEY YOUR DRACULA ANIMATIC IS SO SO GOOD I can't comment on youtube (bc I have no account) but I've watched it like 10 times now, the song fits so well and the art is incredible, I love all your character designs and the way you portray all the scenes is so spot on!

I just finished re: dracula and idk how you managed to tell the whole story so well in under 4 minutes but it was amazing I love the way you use color in the animatic, the use of mostly black/white/grey is so good for evoking the specific type of horror story this is, and it makes the red in the blood and in dracula's eyes stick out in a way that is absolutely brilliant and that last shot with the sunset is GORGEOUS and then the epilogue!!! I love that you did the epilogue to and having the gentle piano music and doing it in full color gives it such a peaceful and comforting feeling, the drawing of quincey and lucy in it in the afterlife together is so sweet <3 the detail that went into this is amazing, like the captain of the demeter having the rosary even though we only see it for a second, I keep wanting to pause on every single frame so I can properly admire all the cool art lol, also the things like jonathan's beard growing out after dracula breaks the mirror, and the rosary hanging above his bed, and dracula still having the scar from the shovel in the final showdown

AND THE PART WHERE DRACULA CATCHES THE LETTER... literally the way you tell the whole story with (almost) NO WORDS in not even 4 minutes and the whole thing flows so smoothly is incredible I love the way you do like the zoom out thing on some places, it adds a whole new dimension to it visually also the way you draw mina and jonathan after the october 3rd bit is lovely, your jonathan looks so cool with the white hair and i love how you did mina's scar, and the part where her scar disappears at the end was such a cool way to depict that and the difference between human lucy and vampire lucy is done so well, like it's so clearly the same character but you can really see how she's not herself anymore, and the way you used that when they kill vampire lucy and show arthur's resolve to use the stake bc he's now seeing her as a monster who replaced and essentially killed the woman he loved and he wants revenge, literally I will never be over how much story and emotion you managed to fit into a single music video and the way you did quincey's death? crying at that part tbh.

AND THE FRAME OF DRACULA GETTING BEHEADED WITH THE RED BACKGROUND.... IS JUST *chef's kiss* I was going to say I have no words for how much I love this but clearly I have quite a lot of words lol, thank you tumblr for not having a character limit anyway have a good day/night :)

Anon I'm so sorry for this delayed reply,,, I kept rereading this in awe and didn't want to release it into the wild (and it still got eaten anyways-)

I'm so glad you enjoyed the character design!! It's not my strong suit at all so that's reassuring. The colour scheme lowkey started out as a timesaving measure, but it also allowed for me to render scenes with detail that I otherwise couldn't've with the tight time frame I had, since at the time I was also juggling university assignments. I'm glad the sunset scene hit as hard as it did, since I had also just discovered Disco Elys/ium, so it was an attempt to emulate Rostov's illustration of Harry on Filippe III's statue). It worked out in the end anyways, since the grayscale + red accent combined with a colourful epilogue gave a "the horror is now in the past, and we are in a (literally visually) livelier future)" <3

I've seen so many people say they want to pause on each frame to examine it in detail, and guess what, you can get a zip file of them all as watermarkless pngs in my kofi! For free! It's pay-what-you-want since I just really wanted to get as many eyes on this as possible, but any tips would definitely still be appreciated.

It was fun mapping out the match cuts and transitions e.g Dracula catching the letter, Mina and Dracula with Lucy in the churchyard, since the previous semester I'd taken a storyboarding class that taught that, so I HAD to include it. Zoom outs helped add visual interest to otherwise still shots, so I'm glad they didn't come off as overdone haha.

It was tough mapping out what storybeats to include, but I'm super happy that the angst for all the key moments in the video hit right :D Was worried about losing momentum after leaving the Jonathan in Dracula's castle bit, and so I really wanted the ending of each verse(?) to correspond with a red screen injury— notice that "you'd better let yourself off and, while you still have strength in your legs, escape from this horrible hell/你最好放过自己 趁��脚还有力气, 快逃出这可怕地狱" always ends with some character harming another, and when the verse repeats again but with the ending lyrics changed "you’d better let yourself off, rather than crying out to another, “Save me!”... Save me!/你最好放过自己 胜过跟谁叫救命... 救命!", it still ends with Van Helsing staking the 3 vampire women. And of course, the ending "escape from this horrible hell/快逃出这可怕地狱" ends with the sunset, its red now replacing that of the blood the characters had to spill previously, signalling an end to their necessary monstrosity (and also a literal monster with Dracula dying).

Like with the frame of Dracula getting beheaded, the timesaving measures, limited skills (plus lack of any sort of storyboarding software, I was just ""animating"" the movements with Shotcut) forced me to find creative workarounds. I could fill at least 3 pages with writing dissecting all my choices lol but idt therell be much interest in me analysing my own art. Thank you so much for watching my animatic :)