#jk i actually love him he's probably my favorite but god is he terrible GOD
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opportunist when I catch you opportunist
#jk i actually love him he's probably my favorite but god is he terrible GOD#voice of the opportunist#slay the princess#there needs to be more oppy love but also more oppy hate out there#i just want people to talk about him#what i would GIVE FOR AN ANGST FIC UGHHHHHH#can you tell im insane yet
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do you have a favorite picture of jungkook? if so I'd love to see it
Oh my god, I love this question so much but I literally do not have a favorite Jungkook pic. I'm sorry, but I can't even think of a single Jungkook pic right now lmao. I'm a terrible Jungkook biased Army. I mean I don't pay much attention to their photoshoots.
Okay, so, I like Jungkook's CK photoshoot, particularly the photo of him smiling wearing his white tee (or is that just in the video?) or the one of him in his denim jacket with a hand to his face; I like that pic of him in his brother's house lying on the floor playing with their dogs; I like Jungkook's last airport pic with Jimin; I love pics where he looks real pretty and ethereal too; I love Jungkook's first Muster Sowoozoo look so any pic of day 1 is good. I love barefaced Jungkook the most, so I probably like screenshots fans take of his lives the most. There are also a lot of airport looks I like.
I don't know... he has way too many cool pics, but I think he looks best when he's not posing for the camera. Candid, barefaced pics are probably the best to me. I can't find the exact picture I want, but it's similar to this one, I also loved this MAMA 2018 look (again, not the picture I wanted...). Wow, it's actually so hard to find decent photos of JK lmao. He has too many and Hybe probably makes it harder to find them without combing through Twitter and Tumblr... Oh well, sorry...
Do you have a favorite Jungkook pic? I can't believe I couldn't find one. That reminds me there's a sunset pic of Jungkook in BV 3 that is sooo pretty. I love cherry Koo (though he looked blond here). It's a pic of this scene.
Anyway, thanks for the ask! I feel so frustrated right now lmao. I really wanted to find the perfect pic!!
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ok so i finished book 6 last night so this is a bit belated but whatever. longass masterpost of my thoughts on everything post 6-81 incoming
i felt awful for vil (3hrs of crying, he’s gotta be dehydrated) but it was lowkey kinda funny how malleus just popped up and was like “i’m in your debt (according to lilia) (pretty sure this was just for their own amusement?? idk man they’re fae) so i’ll help 👍” and just kinda poofed him back to normal.
i think this is the… third time we’ve seen him do smth like that? first at VDC, then during endless halloween night, and finally now. (though EHN came first canonically.) he seems to be making a habit of it. and that joyful squeal? love that. (vil’s normally so poised, though — goes to show how deeply book 6, and being rudely confronted by his fear of aging, rattled him)
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leona: i’ve been fighting all night and i’m dead on my feet
ruggie & jack: sorry what. PLEASE elaborate
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once i saw adeuce the only thought left in my head was “MY BOYS THEYRE HERE” i’m so glad they’re okay like damn. it feels like everyone’s been gone longer than 2 days lmao
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“Human lives are as ethereal as silk thread on a spinning wheel — and just as easily cut short. But their fragility can be a boon. Interweaving and layering those threads creates the strong, resilient tapestry of their history. Such is the creature called man — neighbor to we creatures of the night.”
so so tempted to make part of this my blog quote but it sounds so pretentious. not like the current one isn’t i guess. also sleeping beauty ref goes brrr
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ortho (lovingly) dragging idia is one of my new favorite things i think
“You don’t have any close friends who can keep you in line yet, and I don’t know if you ever will. Not to put too fine a point on it, but leaving you to your own devices is a terrible idea. So… I want to stay with you. Is that asking too much?”
“You’ve been my real brother for a long time now, Ortho.”
“Let’s go back to Night Raven College. You’ve got people waiting for you there.”
“…Yeah, I do, huh.”
LIKE GOD. THEM. i want to stay with you. you don’t have to act like my little brother but you’ve been my real brother for a while now. you don’t have close friends but you DO have people waiting for you. they won’t forget. (and then he ends up gaming with vdc gang and bantering with ortho around them, slowly coming out of his shell if only temporarily, and i’m so soft over that)
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refurbished ramshackle was nice to see but… not really surprising, lol. looks directly at the guest room feature. twsten rlly likes doing things out of order huh.
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also yuu spent “a few weeks” at pomefiore?? honorary heartslabyul student yuu is out, honorary pomefiore student yuu is in. they even got a uniform!!
jk they can coexist
(i will make them coexist. i love them both sm)
(i wanna see riddle and vil fighting over yuu /hj)
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“I was called before parliament in the Land of Dawning. Bigwigs from STYX, the Department of Education, AND the Department of Magic all bombarded me with questions and glared daggers at me… ‘Why are so many consecutive overblots happening on your watch?! How do you explain this?!’
“That’s what I want to know! What have I done, except run this school as diligently as I could?! Night Raven College has resident counselors and medical mages appointed by the Department of Education as it is!
“Since the assembly saw no major issues with the school’s leadership, the inquiry came to a close… But I certainly didn’t expect one of our students to bring about an off-campus catastrophe even as we convened!”
crowley actually getting in legal trouble (or at least being threatened with legal trouble) actually surprised me a lot??? i’m so used to thinking stuff like this would more or less get covered up for plot convenience or wtv that it’s nice to see crowley get smacked with it. rip headmage
ALSO rip therapist yuu memes bc NRC HAS THERAPISTS (tho theyre not rlly dead bc. no one SEES the therapists. probably. stubborn kids.)
=
seeing ortho again = no thoughts left in my head redux, “BABY BOY” edition!! he looks so nice!! i love the lil buttons!! rlly i love all the details, looking like an NRC uniform while still being undeniably ortho
“‘I don’t get it’ is a perfect encapsulation of my current state!”
LOL. he’s not wrong though.
=
…of course crowley took a bribe. i dunno why i’m surprised to hear that.
though in vil’s words, “It’s hardly our place to interject if it’s a win-win for both parties, I suppose.”
crowley’s inquiry about grim’s health makes me side-eye him more strongly the more i think about it. yes i know why (grim attacked yuu, was more strongly affected by the blot, etc) but i’m still suspicious, i wanna know if there’s more to it.
“I’m truly glad that you — ah, that is, ALL of you — made it back to the school safe and sound.”
the way he added “all of you” made it seem to me like they were an afterthought compared to grim…
=
twst rlly put aaaall the fluff at the end huh. not like i’m complaining though!! it’s like a reward for getting through all the angst. idia’s gift is very him (lol) and idia and ortho playing video games with everyone is adorable
“We should probably make Idia play holding the controller backwards or something, though. He’s super good.”
“I see what you’re doing, Ortho. Trying to skate by without any handicaps for yourself, huh? YOU’RE the one who needs extra restrictions, like no items allowed.”
=
play for a crowd! is also up there on my list of favorite twistunes but i can’t play it while sleep deprived or my score goes down the toilet. ask me how i know. half the time normal mode is harder than hard mode.
also i haven’t said it anywhere yet but idia’s battle theme is a banger too. ignihyde osts killed it
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and rook and vil’s discussion of ortho’s soul!! screams!!
“He — or rather, they — chose to try and boost their brother up from the depths below to the skies above. What do you call such love and affection, if not a soul?”
=
the “dream” sequence was so interesting!! yuu and mickey can’t see anything but each other. grim can’t see mickey either, and vice versa.
but. mickey could see silver. why was silver at ramshackle at night? a reasonable assumption is that silver went to ramshackle to find malleus, couldn’t, and left, but really…
why could mickey see silver at all?
i’ve heard (though i haven’t got a source for this unfortunately) that silver says — somewhere — that he’s seen yuu before, or that they look familiar, or something along those lines. i wanna know if this is connected to that. also, silver’s curse. that too. sleep/dreams vs reality etc.
=
and last but not least, lilia is dropping death flags left and right and malleus is Concerned. to be fair, so am i. what’s going on, dude?
(sidenote: damn it riddle’s hair went back to normal. i was hoping he’d just have white hair now 😭)
(also, eagerly awaiting the “gloomurai is idia and muscle red is lilia” reveal in book 7. yana pls.)
(i… may have gotten spoiled a bit. unintentionally. so now i know that in book 7, [REDACTED].)
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ok fine i'll bite
what if u made a tamaki amajiki fic but instead he's actually the UA traitor 😳 and he's actually a yandere and his target's a gender neutral 3rd year 😳 omg that would be pog
haha jk.. unless?
don't bully me pls i haven't done this b4
Miss miss miss sylviaaa 😀😀😀 I lov u miss sylviaaa
——————
Tamaki x reader - My Darling’s Pen
⚠️warnings - yandere Tamaki, stalking
Pronouns - genderneutral, they/them
——————
All it took was a pen.
A pen that dropped from their desk, one that rolled over and knocked against the side of Tamaki’s shoe. He hadn’t noticed them at all for the whole school year, but the moment they tapped him on the arm and said,
“Sorry-can you get that pen for me? It’s near your foot.”
With one of the warmest smiles he’d ever seen, he was smitten. Their voice was tantalizing, sweet and not too loud, and it graced Tamaki’s ears like wedding bells. He didn’t know he was staring until the beauty that was this person waved their hand infront of his face awkwardly.
“...Are you ok?” Their voice was full of worry. Worry for him. Tamaki’s heart swelled with the notion that he was being worried over by someone as...lovely as them.
He nodded shyly, and bent down to swoop up the pen in his hand. Their hand brushed against his when they reached over and grabbed it, and he could still feel his hand tingling even hours after. The person smiled another one of those heart clenching smiles, and looked back down at their paper.
Tamaki couldn’t focus the rest of the period.
——
When the bell dismissing them for lunch rang, and students started getting up from their seats, he once again noticed that person walking past him, talking to their friends. He wished he was part of their friend group. He didn’t know why, but that person just seemed so...cool.
The same pen from earlier bobbed from a hole in their bag’s pocket, and Tamaki cursed himself for staring once more. The pen eventually slipped completely through the small rip in their bag. The pen tumbled onto the ground, and stopped in front of Tamaki.
He picked it up. Should he return it? He looked at the door. No one was there. He was the only person standing in the classroom. Tamaki considered giving it back to them when class ended, but he found himself slowly slipping the pen into his own pocket.
‘It’s a pen’, he thought. ‘Surely they won’t miss it. It’s...it’s a pen.’
He didn’t know why he wanted to keep it so much. It was just that. A pen. He had no use for it-he had tons of other pens that no one asked to borrow because he was too shy to talk to them. It was useless.
But he found himself sitting on his bed hours later, staring blankly at the ceiling while he admired the pen or clicked it once or twice.
It was just a pen...
——
Everyday, when Tamaki would open his pencil pouch, he’d have all these other pens and pencils to choose from, ones that probably wrote way better than that person’s pen, but every single time, his eyes would land on that pen he “found on the ground” and he’d use it.
Fidgeting with the pen after class, he couldn’t help but follow this mysterious pen dropper every single day out to lunch. He wasn’t a stalker, no! He was just...figuring out the right time to return the pen they dropped. The pen they dropped a week ago...
Tamaki saw the familiar mop of (H/c)-colored hair, running past him and to their group of friends that Tamaki just so happened to memorize. He stared at them without shame, until he heard one of them speak.
“Hey, (Y/n). It-it uh, looks like Tamaki-kun wants to talk to you there.” The friend pointed at him, but he only tensed up when their eyes drifted from their friends to him and him alone.
“Oh. Uh, that guy from the big three?”
The person, (Y/n), whispered to their friends. Tamaki’s heart swelled. They knew who he was. He felt a sense of pride. He was important enough to take up space in this beautiful person’s memory. He wanted to be more important, and maybe take up some more space like he never used to want before. He wanted attention when he never used to want attention before.
“...hello?” (Y/n) was in front of him now. They looked straight into Tamaki’s eyes, and Tamaki wanted to look away immediately. He wasn’t ready. He wasn’t sure if he was just nervous like he normally is, or if it was something else. But still...
They smelled so good.
(Y/n) waved their hands in front of Tamaki’s eyes. He blinked, suddenly very aware of how he was lost in his own thoughts. He was about to apologize, and maybe turn to face the wall, until he heard (Y/n’s) lovely, lovely voice.
“You’re really shy, huh? Don’t worry, I can back up if you want me to.”
Their voice was gentle. So gentle, like something fuzzy tickling Tamaki’s nose. It made him want to crawl inside a locker and just breathe. It was heavenly. He wanted nothing more but to just...listen to this person’s kind voice.
“U-u-uh...it’s fi-ine...” Tamaki hated the way his voice was barely audible. It stood nothing against the kind, smooth, god-like voice (Y/n) graced him with. Still, (Y/n) smiled so, so warmly.
“Alright then. Did you need something?”
Oh. That’s right. The pen. He was going to return it. Tamaki began to reach into his pocket, when his hand stopped. He thought about it for a second, then let his hand rest flaccidly inside his pocket, shoving his other one in bashfully aswell.
“I-no...I was just-just staring off into space and I-I guess I was staring in y-y-your direction...”
It was a lie. A terrible one at that. So he didn’t understand why (Y/n) believed him, bid him goodbye with their angelic voice, and let him keep their wonderful pen. He didn’t understand why he didn’t return it either. He needed to...return it. But there was one thing he did know.
That beautiful angel that sat near him in class was named (Y/n).
——
Once you knew someone’s name, it was relatively easy to find out more about them.
For example, Tamaki knew their full name was (L/n) (Y/n), their favorite food was the cafeteria onigiri that lunch rush would package on the go, but specifically if it was left alone to sit for a few minutes to marinate, and he even knew the neighborhood where (Y/n) lived, and how long it took (Y/n) to walk from there to school. 14 minutes and 38 seconds not counting the times they go buy a snack from the convenience store. Though, he wished he knew their exact address.
That wasn’t it, however. Tamaki found himself ‘discovering’ more and more of (Y/n’s) items, whether it be a small keychain hanging off their backpack he purposely loosened with his scissors so it would fall off, or the strawberry scented chapstick that was sitting so enticingly on their desk when they left to the bathroom one day, Tamaki had them all. Nothing too important, though. Nothing that he knew (Y/n) would miss. Just pens and their old loose paper assignments that they threw away, mostly.
And it didn’t help that Tamaki stopped sitting with Mirio and Neijre at lunch, just to purposely sit at a lunch table near (Y/n’s) so he could hear their pretty voice once again. Not too close, but close enough to listen. When Mirio asked, Tamaki told him he just wasn’t feeling very well lately.
But that didn’t make him a stalker, right? He wasn’t overstepping any boundaries...he was just...finding the right opportunity to give back the pen he borrowed. Yeah. That’s it. The pen he borrowed that he actually didn’t borrow. He figured they’d want it back, even though he had countless other little trinkets in his possession, that once belonged to them.
No, no he wasn’t a stalker. He was trying to be a good person and return their pen.
——
Ok, maybe it was a bit of an obsession.
Most of his camera roll was filled with (Y/n). Pictures from their social media that Tamaki cropped so he could only see them (and not their stupid friends), pictures he nervously snuck during class or lunch, and even the occasional picture he took ‘passing by’ when (Y/n) was walking home.
He cherished all of them, even printing some out and building a small shrine with the items he stole. He didn’t want his parents to see, so he made sure it was in a box he could hide in his closet.
Once again, (Y/n) walked home from school like always. They took their normal route, as always. But this time, they walked alone. Tamaki was planning to sneak some more pictures—nothing too indecent because even he has some boundaries—but this time (Y/n) was alone.
‘Ah...!’ Tamaki shuffled through his bag, pulling out the small pencil pouch he bought purely filled with stuff ‘borrowed’ from (Y/n). He fished out the pen he’d been planning to return for a month now, and looked back at (Y/n). ‘Nows the perfect time...’
...But he wanted to keep the pen. It was his favorite pen. Even though he had countless other pens ‘borrowed’ from (Y/n), he couldn’t help but feel attached to this one. So he fished out another random pen from the pouch of (Y/n’s) things, before stopping again.
He didn’t wanna give up these either.
Instead, he zipped up the ‘(Y/n)’ pouch, grabbed his normal pencil pouch, and brought out one of his normal pens. It looked similar to one of the countless pens he took from (Y/n), so he supposed it would suffice. Wasn’t he such a nice person? Giving them a pen?
His poor heart started pumping when he jogged up to (Y/n). Some part of him wanted to just...keeping watching (Y/n) from a distance, but he knew he wanted more for a while now. He wanted to...talk to (Y/n). He wanted (Y/n) to talk to him. He wanted to crawl inside (Y/n’s) body and just be (Y/n).
“E-e-excuse me...?” Tamaki’s voice went dry as he touched (Y/n’s) shoulder. He wasn’t worthy of touching (Y/n’s) shoulder, yet like the horrible person he is, he did. He dirtied the perfect shoulder (Y/n) had. How disgusting of him.
“Yes?”
Tamaki fumbled and held up his pen. “You uh-you dropped this in class earlier...”
“...you sure? I mean,” (Y/n) took the pen, and their warm hand brushed against Tamaki’s fingers so gracefully. It sent shivers down his spine, and he wanted nothing more than to just collapse into (Y/n) and breathe in. “I’m pretty sure I wasn’t using a pen today. But this looks like the brand I buy.”
“U-uh!” Tamaki broke into a cold sweat. “I saw it...drop...out of your bag.”
“Oh.” (Y/n) look at their bag, and at the small hole that was in its side pocket. “There’s a hole..that makes sense. Uh, thanks for returning my pen.”
(Y/n) smiled. Tamaki felt like he was going to die. He didn’t deserve someone so kind and beautiful and caring. Granted, no one did. Not even him.
“Are walking in this direction?” (Y/n) gestured ahead. Tamaki nodded, even though he knew very well his house was blocks away in the opposite direction. He soon found himself walking next to (Y/n) in silence.
He had (Y/n’s) attention. (Y/n) was walking next to him. It’s almost like they were dating already. That’s what lovers do, right? Walk next to eachother?
He wanted nothing more but to just breathe in the scent of (Y/n’s) hair. He wanted to worship (Y/n’s) fingers, he craved the bones in their body, he wanted to praise every single nerve and atom that belonged to (Y/n). He wanted (Y/n) so bad.
He was brought out of his trance when (Y/n) stopped at a crossroads. “My house is this way,” they said.
Tamaki shot back with a “Me too-!” Almost robotically. He wanted to see (Y/n’s) house...and maybe memorize their address. Not in a creepy way, though.
“Well...this is my house, I didn’t know you lived so near to me.”
“Y-yeah.” Tamaki watched as (Y/n) bid him farewell, with an angelic ‘thank you’, and walked off towards their house. Tamaki silently memorized his surroundings, every small flower and potted plant that belonged to the angel that was (Y/n), and finally wrote down (Y/n’s) address with their pen on his hand.
He didn’t know what he would do with this info, if he was honest. But just having it made him feel high.
——
Tamaki was going to do it.
Today was the day he would return the pen.
He thought about it for a while. He loved the pen, he never parted with it, but he needed an excuse to find a way to get closer to (Y/n). He’d say they dropped it out of their bag again and maybe offer to go out for ramen or something. He’d just leave out the part that (Y/n) dropped the pen more than 2 months ago.
Tamaki walked around the U.A. campus with the pen in his hand. He ran his fingers through the barrel of the pen. (Y/n) was no where to be found. They weren’t sitting with their friends like they normally did during lunch, so where could they be?
Tamaki was about to round a corner, when he heard voices talking from the other side. He stopped, about to turn on his heel and leave, when he heard angelic bells ringing. (Y/n’s) lovely voice talking to...whoever they were talking to.
“I-I like you, Hatsumada-kun!”
Tamaki went rigid against the wall. He loved hearing (Y/n’s) lovely voice 24/7, even recoding candid audios of (Y/n) answering questions in class or talking to their friends to listen to while he went to bed, so this was the first time he wished (Y/n) hadn’t said anything.
He was waiting for this Hatsumada guy to speak. Maybe he’d try to catch a glimpse of his face so he could—what was he saying? Intrusive thoughts began to flood his mind. He wanted to punch Hatsumada. He wanted to beat him up. He wanted to murder him.
“...I’m sorry, (L/n)-san. I don’t really see you that way.”
For some reason, Tamaki was even more angry than he would’ve been if Hatsumada had accepted their confession. He pursed his lips, and walked away as quickly as he could. His poor (Y/n), their feelings must be so hurt. How could he?
Tamaki long forgot the pen sitting in his hand, waiting to be returned to its rightful owner.
——
After the third tree came toppling down, Tamaki was beginning to think he’d get charged for property damage.
I mean, it was school property, and it was in the training grounds. Angrily whipping his tentacles around or bucking at trees with horse feet could qualify as ‘training’.
Tamaki was left huffing, glaring down angrily at the fallen, mangled tree. He’d never felt so angry before. He was usually a submissive, “avoid conflict-y”person, and he didn’t get angry much, but he felt so angry he could die.
His poor (Y/n). Having to get rejected by scum like that. But even if that pig had said ‘Yes’, he’d be equally as angry. His beloved (Y/n) didn’t deserve someone as undeserving as him. No one did. No one deserved (Y/n), not even himself.
Momentarily turning his tentacles back into his regular limbs, Tamaki sighed and curled up next to the fallen tree trunk. His hands were bloodied up, his knuckles peeling from when he started punching and slashing at tree before he decided to use his quirk. It was probably the first time he’d been so angry.
Tamaki leaned back against the trunk, laying down on the uncomfortable wood. What was happening to him? He felt so mad he could die. He couldn’t believe he was imagining trees as Hatsumada, as he brutally destroyed them one by one. That wasn’t the actions of a hero...
Rustling from two tall bushes caused Tamaki to shoot up, his tentacles shooting out from his back, and probably ripping his shirt up. He stood alert, his wide eyes searching sporadically through his dark bangs. Finally, a man, whom Tamaki was pretty sure wasn’t a teacher, appeared from the bushes, holding a cane and his free arm up.
“I come in peace, Tamaki Amajiki-san.”
The man had a stylish top hat on, and his face was masked with a flat, white mask with black trim. He had a long coat on, and dark gloves that made him look like a magician.
“W-who are you? This is private property-!”
The man kept walking towards Tamaki. “Are you angry, Tamaki-kun?”
“I-of course I’m mad! You’re trespassing, so I suggest you leave before I call-“
“I’m not talking about that. I’m talking about that boy. The one talking to that person you fancied.”
Tamaki went silent. He let his tentacles falter from their alert position, before suspiciously bringing them back up. “H-h-how do you know that! You stalker!”
“Frankly you’re one to call me a stalker.”
Tamaki broke into a cold sweat. He raised his fists defensively. “I-I’m not a-I’m not-“
“But you are, aren’t you? It’s fun to watch the people you love, isn’t it?” A girl grabbed Tamaki from behind by the shoulders, making him flinch as she smiled widely. “I love it too-I love it so much I want to see the person I love all covered in blood...”
The girl unhanded Tamaki, and stepping in front of him and standing next to the taller, poised man. “But they don’t understand our kind of love, do they? The heroes. They think the way I love people is wrong, and they would think the same for you...”
Tamaki pursed his lips. This was manipulation. They were trying to get into his head somehow, trying to appeal to him, trying to convince him that he was just like the scum they were...
...and it was working.
Tamaki said nothing, though his tightly clenched fists and hinged jaw told a different story. He loved (Y/n). He loved (Y/n) so much it made him crazy. He loved (Y/n) so much it made him want to murder Hatsumada. Simple as that. He was trying to convince himself he didn’t, but the sight of him all bloodied up and misshapen by Tamaki’s bare hands made him shiver.
“Y’know, people will call you a stalker for sure if they saw this.” The man was holding up Tamaki’s school bag, more importantly the scrapbook pasted with printed out photos and pressed objects of (Y/n) littered inside. The man flipped through the pages with care. “I, however, think it’s lovely that you admire someone so much you’d make a whole book dedicated to them. How romantic.”
He found himself agreeing. It was, wasn’t it? He cared so, so much, so how could it be weird or creepy or stalkerish? Tamaki shook his head, shaking the intrusive thoughts from his mind. “N-no! Put that back! Why are you here?!”
“We want to make a deal with you.”
“Me?” Tamaki snarled, backed up against a tree. He hardened his exterior in hope of masking his utter curiosity, especially after their understanding of his feelings for (Y/n). They understood.
“You see, learning information about U.A. is difficult when it’s such a prestigious school. But it would definitely be a lot easier if we had an...inside man feeding it to us.”
Tamaki’s eyes widened. “You want me to betray my school?”
“In Laymans terms, yes.”
“Now why would I ever-!”
“Because they don’t understand us. Once they find out you sneak pictures of this person from outside their window while they sleep, they label you a stalker for sure.” The girl held up Tamaki’s scrapbook, displaying hazy printed photos of (Y/n) through their bedroom window. “But us? We don’t judge. We understand. You just want to admire them, and love them the way you do and not be judged. I want that too.”
The man chimed in. “Your school is a judgmental, horrible place. So help us fix it, and join the LoV.”
Tamaki looked down at his feet. He continued. “You don’t need to join us physically. You may still attend U.A., and we will contact you occasionally, when we need information. And surely we will spare you from harm if we decide to attack, as well your little crush.”
Tamaki couldn’t believe he was actually considering it. Well, he also couldn’t believe how angry he got seeing someone being confessed to, or how obsessive his feelings for (Y/n) became. It was all new to him.
...So what was one thing more?
“I’ll do it. I’ll do it on one condition.”
His decision was based purely on feelings. Nothing of what he was saying was logical. It wasn’t morally correct. Still...
The man and the girl both smiled, looked at each other, and nodded. They turned back to Tamaki, giving him a look to go on.
“If I...when I decide to do something...a-and it makes a mess, or I need covering up in any way, promise you’ll clean up for me. Evidence and all.”
Was he really going to do this?
“Whatever you need, Tamaki-kun.”
He was.
The man tipped his hat, and the girl placed the book back in Tamaki’s hands. “We’ll be in touch. If you do anything heinous, we’ll be there to help aswell. Anything for our new traitor.”
Tamaki felt sick to his stomach.
“...y-you guys are crazy.”
“And you’re a lovesick stalker.”
“...I know.”
Tamaki watched as the two disappeared behind the brush. His knees buckled, as he sat back against the disfigured tree truck, and reached into his bag. He cradled his scrapbook as he fished out (Y/n’s) pen that he loved so much, and stroked it scantily. He huddled in on himself, pressing the pen to his cheek.
Soon.
Soon he’d return (Y/n’s) pen. Right after he murdered Hatsumada.
——————
If y’all didn’t know the man and the girl was mr compress and toga
-Mr. Mizunetzu
#tamaki x y/n#tamaki headcanons#tamaki amajiki#tamaki amajiki x reader#tamaki x male reader#tamaki amajiki x gn reader#tamaki x gn reader#bnha x reader#bnha fic#bnha x male reader#mha x gn reader#bnha x gn reader#mha x male reader#yandere tamaki#yandere tamaki x reader#yandere tamaki amajiki
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I think I could probably live in this chapter of TL it’s so lovely from start to finish! They talked a LOT (well she did most of the talking but he talked too!), reevaluated their past relationship versus a potential current one, and did I mention they talked HONESTLY about FEELINGS which is a huge deal for this couple 😔
The giant’s love for JK is honestly iconic. Will we ever get backstory on why the giant likes him so much and why he cared enough to keep JK from dying? I remember it being alluded to before but we’ve never gotten a certain answer have we?
Also I love Mishka a lot! She’s probably my favorite OC of yours but she’s wrong when she says JK lost nothing. No, he wasnt physically or constitutionally violated but for a man of faith to lose said faith is a big deal. He really believed the gods would protect Mishka and it’s easy for us in a modern setting to say that that’s foolish but he really believed he was doing what was right and it blew up in his face and ending up hurting the one person he would die to protect. And in the aftermath of sexual trauma, at least for me personally, I would have rather been dead than have to keep going carrying such pain. I’m not saying she’s wrong to say she suffered MORE (even though playing the trauma olympics is never a good idea) but Jungkook did lose things. He lost his faith, his love, his world and his will to live.
The books in JK’s possession were very interesting to me, though. A lot about wyverns and their poison…maybe it’s just a coincidence but reading those titles (and before he said he couldn’t read) I thought maybe JK had been doing research into M’s family, more specifically, I thought maybe he was investigating the possibility of her mother’s death being caused by wyvern poison. I hope we hear from ghost mama again before the story ends! Will this one have an epilogue too like LB or just a last chapter?
I wonder if JK feels even guiltier about making himself sick and being the reason his mother came home, after hearing about Marcus from Mishka. I hope they meet. I don’t expect it to go particularly well considering the resentment Marcus seems to hold and the guilt JK feels.
With only a couple chapters left I feel comfortable asking, will we see more of the Orlais gang? Or is that part of the story over?
And last but not least…Heidi…I’m single and free on Friday if you’re looking for a woman of your own🥴
🍉
Sorry it took me a day (or two? I don't remember) to answer this!!
Re: the giant, I actually have a short story planned about the giant, I'm not even kidding. It'll cover the giant taking up residence by the hold through the end of the main story.
I definitely agree with you about JK, he did lose a lot -faith, happiness, his plans for the future, his beloved, his pride, and his confidence in himself. Even physically, he now has the hand tremble (likely nerve damage).
This story will have an epilogue, yes!
The Orlais gang, alas, will not face any repercussions in this story, but we'll see more of that terrible crew when we focus on Jimin's side story 😉
Heidi has heard your messaged and noted that it is now Friday 😘
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Ok Ashley, first of all when I saw the gif you used, I know you were about to FUCK ME UPPPP. Alright bubs, buckle up this is gon be a RIDE cus phew I am the biggest hoe for ego. I’ve literally re-read the whole series MULTIPLE TIMES and it’s never NOT funny, like I still cackle at the same jokes every damn time. Anyways, yes let’s get it. I love how you’ve used common tropes like fuckboy!jk, fratboy!jk, college au, F2L, and onebed, but have completely made it your own. Like I feel like even if
you posted your work under some other pen name, I’d still recognize your style and work. You have a very specific voice? Very “YOU” BRAND of writing and that’s probably one of the HARDEST things to achieve as a writer. Mc is a delight and the way she be low key losing her cool over sleepin in the same bed as kook has me cryin cus girl I FEEL YA. “just a t-shirt advertising your university’s Segway club that you had swiped off a table for free during freshman orientation” HAHAHA mc and I are the
same fuckin people is2g cus free is for me. ALSO DUDE, “Jungkook softly, but audibly inhaled, like he was gearing up to say something of importance” BUT WHAT WAS HE GOING TO SAY?! I need to know, it’s for science. Also, high key endeared that he calls he “noona” cus I’m a pervy old lady and a lady could dream ok. Yes, now we get to the good stuffs, cus motherfucker would I love to wake up to kook’s morning wood wow he really be like a man buffet- he’s both cute and dashingly sexy. “attempting to
smooth your expression into one of ignorant unconsciousness as adrenaline pounded through you. Your eyes were closed, but that didn’t stop you from feeling his close proximity as he gingerly leaned over you to scope out your face” OMFG THE WAY MY BLOOD PRESSURE SKYROCKETED. Ngl been there and it’s SO uncomfortable like can he NOT feel my heart falling right outta my ass??? Kudos to mc for keeping composure (cus I wasn’t able to oops) kinda interested in what the situation woulda looked like had
he known she was awake tho?? “really? … fucking really gonna do this now?” HAHAH OMG “the way he was using the clothes he had apparently grabbed from his bag to hide his crotch from your view” the consistency in your writing is SO IMPRESSIVE like… when I read ego I see it as a move in my head bc of all these small, but important, details. They both migrated towards each other uwu that is SO CUTE, esp with kook as the big spoon wrapped all around her ughhh my heart. And the way she grabbed a
plate of food for baby boy has me SO ENDEARED, it’s so sweet the way she’s thinking of him and his favorite food. Ok, BUT CAN WE TALK ABOUT NAMJOON AND LISA, cus Namjesus they totally boned that night didn’t they?! The whole breakfast scene had me ROLLING “jungkookie lost his hands in a tragic paragliding accident” and “…like he was sitting there smiling at you, eyes sparkling like he was a big titty anime girl?” honestly, I gotta hand it to you, there has been no fic that makes me laugh the way
ego does. The dialogue, the pop culture references (re: pimp my ride, fear factor, “Squidward”, etc), the humor KILLS ME. You seem like the funny af friend in the group. Like “baby wine doesn’t exist because that illegal. and, frankly, immoral.” “But I would just like to state for the record that I’m the one who passed through her vagina.” “Tore it too, from what I hear” HAHA OMFG THEIR BANTER IS A+ bff shitting on each other and I’m living for it!!! The whole laser tag scene was pure gold.
The way lisa started opening up, jk’s cocky ass, mc/joon’s mess of team work, the way jungkook calls mc “babe” instead of “noona” (what’s with that anyways? He wanna be seen as manlier or something??), the return of the god of destruction, “Yeah, well you also have no upper lip” HAHAHAHA ok but I actually love jk’s sparce upper lip and buck teeth, it’s just so SWEET &ENDEARING. “You watched his tongue roll in his cheek as he considered you. It was sexy” HELL MFING YES IT’S SO SEXY!! I love this
characterization of jk- he’s very layered. He’s sweet, charming, sexy, dumb af, and annoying all at the same time which makes him feel vvv real to me. And now the smut. The fact that they’re in the same position as the other morning, but unlike last time, she’s ready to do something about it. The mouth on that boy omg reminds me of “do you kiss your mom with that mouth?” from an earlier chapter phew. I love that he’s focused on prepping her with all the grinding and fingering. While v sexy, also
shows he cares about her pleasure in that he wants her to enjoy penetration. The bit when he’s just dazed when she’s urging him to get a condom has me chuckling- is he THAT shook that it’s actually happening?? “He slid the rubber on with shaky hands.” Makes me think that he’s both nervous and excited and it’s more than just one time fucking to him. And the way she asks to ride him phew, she really be LIVIN THE DREAM that’s my ultimate fantasy let’s be real until he opens his dumb mouth “Hop on.
Please remember to fasten your seatbelt and for your safety keep all items stowed beneath the seat in front of you until after takeoff” OMFG HE’S SO ANNOYING HAHAHA “You placed another kiss on a pebbled nipple, intrigued when you heard him swallow a moan. Emboldened, you circled it with your tongue, scratched it lightly with your teeth. Jungkook whined, and the sound shot straight to your clit” FUCK THAT’S HOT. I am 10/10 a hoe for nipple play. Holy shit, and the way he pulled outta her cus he
knew he wasn’t going to make it in time for her to cum too, so he opts to eat her out first. We LOVE a man who prioritizes female pleasure!! Hnng and the way she agrees to continue fucking even after she’s already came and the way kook just GOES TO FUCKING TOWN ON THAT PUSS had my vag ROLLINGGGG damn I really feel bad for whoever is sharing a wall with them rn cus that headboard RIP my heart “I win” wtf dude his pillow talk SUCKS ASS. Just when she thinks she’s not just a game to him, he pulls
this shit. It’s probably just a dumb af joke cus we know my bby be competitive as all hell and also ain’t that smart, but damn. Not. The. Time. UGHHHH I just want to squish their faces together and be like "TALK TO EACH OTHER PLS- this is all a terrible misunderstanding" TL;DR my panties are wet, my heart is broken, and I kinda wanna knee kook in the balls. Thank you for this update!! Masterpieces are ALWAYS worth the wait!! It's bitter sweet that ego is comin to the end. Sending all my love
PHEWWWWW, THIS REVIEW!! 😭😭💕we still have one part left, so i’m not gonna confirm or deny any of your assumptions. but OMG, i’m so touched that my work left this big of an impression on you! your commentary made me smile so big 😩😩😩 truly, thank you so much for enjoying my wacky fic and my wacky characters. it really means a lot to know that people love my babies as much as i do, and that they’re actually as invested in the storyline as i am. ego was my first fic for the bts fandom, so she’s really special to me and it makes me happy that others enjoy her 🤧💕 and that you enjoy my writing style 😭😭😭pls 😭😭😭
thank you again for your sweet words. hopefully i can finish ch 8 sooner than later!
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━━ ˟ ⊰ ✰ ( sofia carson, she/her ) is that LORAINE MORENO i just spotted in blackfalls? i hear they’re a 24 / 118 year-old VAMPIRE studying ART. i’ve heard that they’re ADVENTUROUS & DETERMINED but can also be SELF-DESTRUCTIVE & SECRETIVE. ( annie, 19, gmt+2, she/her )
Hello friends!! I’m Annie, a certified dumbass and a college student, though clearly my professors aren’t giving me enough work... (jk i’m drowning in assignments, i just pretend i do not see it) and this is Loraine who I adore but who is also a big meanie
TWs: mentions of death and murder!! Please proceed with caution!!
B A S I C S
𝐍𝐀𝐌𝐄 : Loraine Moreno 𝐒𝐏𝐄𝐂𝐈𝐄𝐒 : vampire 𝐍𝐈𝐂𝐊𝐍𝐀𝐌𝐄𝐒 : Lo, Lori, Raine 𝐆𝐄𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑 & 𝐏𝐑𝐎𝐍𝐎𝐔𝐍𝐒 : cis woman & she/her 𝐃𝐎𝐁 & 𝐀𝐆𝐄 : december 25th 1901 at 6:11 am & twenty-four / hundred and eighteen 𝐙𝐎𝐃𝐈𝐀𝐂 : capricorn sun, cancer moon & leo ascendant 𝐒𝐄𝐗𝐔𝐀𝐋𝐈𝐓𝐘 : pansexual & panromantic 𝐑𝐄𝐋𝐈𝐆𝐈𝐎𝐍 : atheist 𝐋𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐔𝐀𝐆𝐄𝐒 𝐒𝐏𝐎𝐊𝐄𝐍 : english, spanish, greek 𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐎𝐍𝐀𝐋𝐈𝐓𝐘 : + adventurous, supportive, focused, resilient - explosive, vengeful, self-destructive, grumpy 𝐀𝐋𝐈𝐆𝐌𝐄𝐍𝐓 : chaotic neutral 𝐌𝐁𝐓𝐈 : isfp 𝐄𝐍𝐍𝐄𝐀𝐆𝐑𝐀𝐌 : type 8, the challenger
T R A G I C B A C K S T O R Y
𝟏. 𝐓𝐑𝐔𝐓𝐇 𝐁𝐄 𝐓𝐎𝐋𝐃, Loraine doesn’t remember much of her early life. At this point, most of her memories are bare flashes through her mind. It was all good - that she’s certain of - up until her mom died in an accident. Her father wasn’t the same ever since, his eyes were vacant and he barely spoke. He left one day and Lori never saw him, after that. She moved to stay with her aunt and although she took care of Loraine it was pretty clear that it was something she did out of pure obligation.
𝟐. 𝐋𝐎𝐑𝐀𝐈𝐍𝐄 𝐇𝐀𝐒 𝐀𝐋𝐖𝐀𝐘𝐒 been really easy to provoke but instead of growing out of it, she actually embraced it. If the word and the people who inhabited it were pure shit, why should she try to be anything different? She was mean and she started fights over the smallest of things, though she was terrible at finishing them. No matter, she got up and dusted herself off.
𝟑. 𝐇𝐄𝐑 𝐀𝐔𝐍𝐓 was no exception and the two of them fought pretty often. At the end of the day, Loraine rely on herself and herself only and she simply couldn’t wait until she moved out. She did, eventually, and she quite enjoyed living on her own. But you know, her temper had still not calmed down and eventually, when she was twenty-four, she messed with the wrong kinds of people. Though, they weren’t even people, were they? The vampires drank most of her blood and left her to die like that. That’s when another vampire (see wanted connections) noticed her and took pity on the dying girl, making sure she had some of their blood so she wouldn’t actually die.
𝟒. 𝐒𝐇𝐄 𝐀𝐖𝐎𝐊𝐄 𝐓𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐃𝐀𝐘 even more messed up than before. The faces of the vampires that did that to her were ingrained in her mind and the desire for revenge was what fueled her for a long time. Loraine was obsessed with finding them, desperately clinging to any and all clue of their whereabouts. It took many years but she did manage to track them down and kill them.
𝟓. 𝐍𝐄𝐄𝐃𝐋𝐄𝐒𝐒 𝐓𝐎 𝐒𝐀𝐘 she had no idea what to do with herself after that. Her goal was finished. She traveled throghouht Europe for a few years before settling in Greece for a bit over the past decade. She’s worked night shifts as a bartender and treated it all as a creative break. The mundanity of it all was starting to grow too boring and calm for Loraine so the news of the mixed school piqued her interest and now here she is, looking to spice up her days.
𝐓𝐋𝐃𝐑 ; Loraine is a shit-stirrer with a short-fuse, despite the fact that she couldn’t fight for shit. It eventually got her killed and she spent a good bunch of her life chasing after the people who left her to die to get her revenge. She’s been pretty lost and confused afterwards and is subconsciouslly looking for a new purpose in life.
S O M E T H I N G E X T R A
𝐈. To elaborate on her self-destructive tendencies, Lori runs on self-hate a lot of the time. She likes to push herself to her limits by doing dumb shit i.e. trying to see how much time she can really go without blood.
𝐈𝐈. Loraine can be pretty flirty but she avoids actual relationships like the plague. It’s not hard for her to get attached to people but as soon as someone says they like (or God forbid love) her, she shuts down and pushes them away.
𝐈𝐈𝐈. Despite that she can be pretty caring when she genuinely likes someone. She’d do the occasional check up and remind them to take care of themselves in her own special (read: lowkey agressive) way.
𝐈𝐕. Her favorite color is plum and she hates red ever since she was turned. Surprisingly she really likes cutesy, animated movies and The fox and the hound is her all time favorie. ALSO!! She really loves jazz and she is a huge Frank Sinatra fan.
𝐕. Grumpy cat embodied and she doesn’t quite understand memes. If you tell her a pun she will punch you in the face.
𝐕𝐈 . If you click here you will be redirected to her pinterest board !! There are TWs in the description so, again, please proceed with caution.
W A N T E D C O N N E C T I O N S
I am such a sucker for strong platonic bonds!! Loraine is really unfriednly but if for some reason your character has decided to put up with that, I’d love for her to have some friends (especially if they have been friends for a long time)
fHFH any familial relationships, too!!
Also,, I would really love to have the vampire that saved her all those years back. She’s got a lot of respect and admiration for them and, tbh, she would probably follow them to the ends of the world? It can go a lot of ways so yeah!
ENEMIES. Please! She’s horrible so I need some people who dislike her.
Another classic one: friend(s?) with benefits mayhaps.
Maybe some people who she’s decided to take under her wing and decided to adopt a big sister sort of role with them?
#corvusintro#tw death#tw murder#i'm so sorry this is so long hshhd#i spend way too much time on it#so... /yeet/
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2020 in fic
2020 was terrible year but an okay year of fic considering i didn’t really write till october.
STATS: fics: 1 fic; i wrote drabbles because i can’t write long fics. but i wrote 8 drabbles? female pov: 8 male pov: 1 (i thought i had more but nope, they’re all wips) both pov: 0 (i haven’t written anything long to justify both pov) total word count: (lol, i’ll update this later but i know it’s absolute shite) OVERALL: Looking back, did you write more fic than you thought you would this year, less, or about what you'd predicted? both! i started this blog in january, wrote two things, then forgot about it because life kind of took over. because i didn’t write for so long, i didn’t intend on coming back, but i realized that i had a couple wips for the dictionary of lovers that i never uploaded so i came back sometime in october? (i published one and then kind of tucked away the rest because i wasn’t sure what i quite wanted to do with tdol)
i started off this year intending to write and finish tdol (26 drabbles), but that didn’t end up happening, so less. but when i stopped, i also didn’t think i would ever come back to posting, yet here i am! and i’ve posted drabbles and have a bunch in the wip folders, so more! tl;dr: less than i thought but also more than i thought. What pairing/genre/fandom did you write that you would never have predicted in January? i don’t write cross fandoms anymore (though that was my start in ff, my peak poetry days), but i never thought i would write 2nd pov/memberxreader because i started off writing memberxmember fics for bangtan, so i suppose that! Did you take any writing risks this year? most definitely. i never thought i would write 2nd person pov, but here i am. and i didn’t think i’d write memberxreader, but here i am! (a bundle of surprises i am) 2nd person pov is actually a lot harder for me to write, but i’m getting better at it.
pens and paperwork actually has a lot of dialogue and less purple prose: i think it’s the one piece i wrote that was less emotion based and more plot, which is very out of character for me. it’s also a little (a lot) different than what i normally write, so that was also a risk, but i enjoyed writing that one so much: it’s definitely one of my favourite pieces and i want to flesh out that universe a little more. Do you have any fanfic or profic goals for the New Year? write! longer! fics! i want to rewrite “the dictionary of lovers” and put it together into a long fic. i have a multiverse fic that i’ve been planning out, and i want to finish 9,719km and make it at least 10K: i want to practice fleshing out characters and worlds. my goal in general is just to write a long fic (9,719km, i’m looking at you). and also return to writing memberxmember fics too (i have a namgi fic in the works and there are def taekook ideas). get better at writing openings and closing and titling fics. god, i suck at titles.
also, i would very much like to publish most of my wips. so, future violet, here’s to hoping you do that. What were last year's goals? this is my first year, but last year, my goal was to just start a writing tumblr and write! and i’ve managed to do that! so yay 🎉 BEST AND WORST: My best story of this year: nine thousand, seven hundred nineteen kilometers. i love it to bits and pieces and i had it in my drafts for a while? because i wanted to publish it as a full fic but who knows when that will be, so i published it anyways. also this part was so much better than the other parts, so no regrets, i suppose. i think it is my favourite piece i’ve written, along with pens and paperwork, because it’s so different from what i’m used to writing? (both are also yoongi fics, funny enough) i definitely think it’s less purple prose (though 9,719km def has elements of that still; can’t get it out of my system) so hs me would not have approved, but i love it to smithereens. i try to not read any of my fics after posting them though because i’m incapable of letting it be: i have to perform autopsies on it, pick at the bad parts, cut open the good ones for flaws, until it’s virtually unrecognizable and ruined, so i can’t bring myself to reread it, but as of now, from what i remember, i think it’s my best story. My most popular story of this year: love is a losing game (we played anyways): i’m so flattered and in awe that people actually liked this story because it was so hard for me to write. it’s only 1k and it took me a good week before i could publish it because i kept tripping over the language. and i felt (still feel) like pre-dialogue and post-dialogue are two different stories, which was extremely frustrating for me. i think i can write dialogue (this story is a different beast, just because of the nature of the beginning) but it’s really hard for me to combine poetry/prose with dialogue. i feel like it throws it off but the only other way to write it would be in a short bit compilation (i’ll write fics like that again someday) and i didn’t feel like it would work for lialg. (funny story: it was actually a royalty!namjoon fic where he wants to give her the world but it turns out she was a spy and she essentially burns his kingdom to the ground) i’m honestly not too happy about how it turned out but i’m still glad people enjoyed it! Story of mine most under-appreciated by the universe, in my opinion: none! i really didn’t expect to have an audience, so people stopping and reading my fics? wild. Most fun story to write: pens and paperwork. that drabble was so much fun to write and i loved the characters. also gave me the least amount of headaches, probably because it kind of wrote itself once i started. i really do want to expand on that universe, just because i want to revisit it and explore 007′s background (maybe write about 005 and 006 as a spin off though whether i want to make it taexreader or taexjimin is to be determined) and yoongi’s journey in the MI6/NIS as well!
Story that shifted my own perceptions of the characters: probably pens and paperwork? i’ve always known that yoongi was a dynamic and versatile person but that fic really did it for me. i can totally see him being this sarcastic, dry person, but also someone with a lot of love and care for others, like he does with 007 by bringing her alc when she’s in pain and generally trying to distract her as she’s getting stitches. someone who’s as loud as they are quiet. i definitely want to write more soft yoongi though.
Hardest story to write: i am your ocean (your little mermaid). hands down. i don’t know if tae is just really hard to write (for me) or if that fic was a monster of it’s own, but i spent two+ weeks working on it. it went through so many storyline revisions and changes and then even after i had a decent idea of the final plot, it took me another week to write fucking 1.4k. absolutely awful. do i like it? i don’t even know. but i don’t like hoarding fics, so it’s out there for the word to pick at, to dissect it’s anatomy, to taxidermy it. Biggest disappointment: the movietheaterworker!oc x marvelnerd!jk fic that i never published. i don’t know if it’s just bad or it’s just not what i wanted but i haven’t touched it since october (and idk if i want to look at it) so that says something.
in terms of something i published, probably “heart” from tdol. i re-read it recently and it just felt really bleh to me? i should have more attachment to it considering it’s my first drabble on this account but nope. some parts of it are cute but it’s so clunky. i don’t like it. Biggest surprise: pens and paperwork or monsters under the bed. pens and paperwork because of how much i loved it/how fast it wrote itself and how much i liked it afterwards, even though it’s written in a much different style than i normally write? monsters under the bed because it was written with no direction and honestly feels like a fever dream (though i did have a backstory to jk’s character and his relationship with oc), yet it still was well liked! i kind of posted it as the start to the “things you said” drabble collection and was like here goes nothing, but people seemed to really enjoy it!! which was very surprising. and my butterfly, noor, called me the bob ross of fanfiction (that still cracks me up) so! Most unintentionally telling story: hmmm...probably anything from tdol. i’ve been so fortunate to have such beautiful, healthy, intimate platonic relationships, but the one (two if we’re being generous, which we most def are if counting it) romantic relationship i’ve had was quite awful and extremely toxic. (ask me about it if you want to: i like to rant about it from time to time) so tdol is a creation of wishful thinking, of what i think a healthy relationship should look like, through the ups and downs, the highs and lows. because i don’t have experience with healthy romantic relationships, i def put a lot of my friendships and bits and pieces from those into tdol. and it’s not published yet, but there’s an unwritten piece from tdol where oc talks about how she doesn’t believe in love but jk very much is a hopeless romantic, and that’s me writing me into a fic so.
HIGHLIGHTS + WRAP-UP: Favorite opening lines:
(god, i suck at opening lines)
tdol “perfect” + coming back home to you would always be one of the highlights of my day. whenever the sun shined for a little too long, a storm would hit, but this--coming home to and closing the day with you--was one of the few things in life that was completely and utterly mine to have, out of the reaches of whatever was out there that made sure the road was never too smooth. [note: this isn’t THE opening line but we’ll ignore that]
9,719km + paris is much quieter than the places you’re used to, but it’s not a bad thing.
Favorite closing lines: (i struggle so much with these) i’ll be your ocean (your little mermaid) + the enfilade of rain continues and pelts against the windowpane, against your balcony floor.
monsters under the bed + but when he opens his eyes again, to the blaring 1:01AM of his clock, you’re no longer by his side.
9,719km + p.s. did you miss me? + maybe he’s just as potent as a habit, just as hard to kill.
Favorite lines in general: i’ll be your ocean (your little mermaid) + you let the words fall from your lips, dribble down your skin like water droplets, and dissipate in the ocean of your feelings. watch them dissolve into the seafoam of your being and sink down, down, down. + it feels a little like that now as you card your fingers through his sweaty locks, dyed red like ariel’s, bright red against the blue of both your feelings.
love is a losing game (we played anyways) + he looks at you like you hold the secrets of the universe, even as he tears through the valley of your breasts with the claws of his ambitions and devotion. + (the summary line: he builds cathedrals in your name, whispers prayers into your skin, and you shatter the stained glass windows of his dreams.)
9,719km + nothing has been able to keep him out: not the gallery treasury in newport beach with its earthquake proof alarm system, not the cartier vault in new york city with its impressive randomized laser grid, and certainly not the flimsy, fickle alarm system of your heartbeat.
LIST OF COMPLETED STORIES: [note: does tdol count? i’ll put it here anyways. also i suck at titles] the dictionary of lovers: heart the dictionary of lovers: confirmation the dictionary of lovers: perfect love is a losing game (we played anyways) monsters under the bed pens and paperwork i’ll be your ocean (your little mermaid) nine thousand, seven hundred nineteen kilometers you feel like a holiday
WIP TEASERS: welcome to wonderland (we’re all mad here) (aliceinwonderland!au) summary: queen of hearts!jk x alice!reader
excerpt: be careful in the woods, they whisper. so many girls have gotten lost and made it out with just their bodies intact, bones rattling hollow and mind astray. the girls mumble about tea parties with madness, about croquet games with the heads of the executed, before they are wheeled off to hospitals, still talking to the wall.
be careful in the woods, they warn. it preys on your fear and feeds on your sanity, if you linger too long.
i know you (i’ve walked with you once upon a dream) (dreamwalkers!au) summary: oc works for the department of dreams: bureau of night terrors as a dreamwalker. jungkook has chronic nightmares.
excerpt: They tell lucid dreamers to look down at their hands, notice the garbled image to recognize they’re in a dream. Your brain backtracks to what it last remembers. A click of the seatbelt, Jimin’s soft “sleep tight,” the cool air inside the tank. Darkness. You grip the wand a little tighter.
Dreamscapes are weird, you think as you conjure up an ironwood table and a cup of earl grey. The fabric of reality is so thin, so permeable and malleable with the right amount of knowledge. If you think really hard, slip a hand through that curtain, you can still feel the cold air lingering on your skin from the tank. You look down at your watch. 8:44. Eight hours and fourty four minutes left to wander through other people’s nightmares.
if the world was ending (you’d come over, right?) (au where the world slowly comes to a halt and you find yourself calling your ex. inspired by “if the world was ending” by jp saxe and julia michaels) summary: ex!tae x female!reader
excerpt: The world starts to freeze over when you’re on the bus ride home.
Pedestrians pause in the middle of the sidewalk; cars decelerate in the middle of accelerations. The chatter in the bus groans to a stop, like a radio after the plug has been pulled, as everyone slowly freezes. Your hair, which once fluttered in the breeze, gently falls back into place.
The traffic light is red.
You pull your earbuds out. It’s quiet. Too quiet.
“Hello?” you whisper, shaking the arm of your neighbor. No response. The silence is loud, almost deafening.
“Hello?” you walk down the aisle to where your driver sits. His face is still. Annoyance clouds his eyes, chest puffed like he was about to take a deep breath. One he’ll never take again.
You shuffle your feet back and trip on the stairs, back slamming against plexi glass and metal.
The light never turns green.
untitled (mermaid!au)
excerpt: Jungkook loves the sea, but he thinks he might like you a little bit more. You, with the sea breeze in your hair and summer storm in your eyes. There’s something about the way you sparkle like the ocean top, sun skimming across skin, that makes him think you might be more than human, a trick of light, an optical illusion.
untitled (desert princess x pirate!jk au) summary: i love you the way ocean clings to shore, the way the horizon wants the sea, but, darling, we were never meant to be
excerpt: you’re pretty sure the ocean is enchanted, bright blue waters glimmering with magic. nothing else could explain how jeon jungkook, notorious pirate and thief, owns eyes that twinkle like the night sky and a face that puts the sunset to shame, unless he managed to somehow steal those too. you wouldn’t put it past him. + they name hurricanes after girls, he tells you. a prayer for gentleness, a hope for small casualties. huh, you reply, whoever came up with that idea must never have been caught in the storm of a girl.
IN CONCLUSION:
wow, could i be any more conspicuous about which drabble i like the most? why do i use so many parenthesis? also, i suck at titles and opening and closing lines. but hey, i’m trying, and sometimes that’s all i can ask from myself. i wrote a lot less than i thought but also more than i thought, so cheers to that. maybe next year will be better, maybe it’ll be worse. who knows? hopefully it’ll read easier though. p.s. if you’ve read this and if you’ve read anything i’ve written, thank you for reading. thank you for sticking through the calamity of my thoughts, through the hurricane of my mind. you have no idea how much it means. i hope i’m able to make your day a little better, a little brighter, a little light in this time of darkness. p.p.s. i’ve made a few friends on tumblr. i won’t tag them because i don’t want to put them through this awful clusterfuck of words, but if any of you read this, hi. you’ve really shaped my tumblr experience and i’m so glad to have met you all. noor (papillionsgf): my butterfly, i adore you. you were my first tumblr friend and you’ve been nothing but sweet to me. thank you for talking to me and thank you for our lovely conversations, for letting me squeal about tfua, for i absolutely adore you. hana (cutechims): the two of us are awkward potatoes, and i still need to rewatch batman begins, but thank you for always being so sweet, so kind. i love talking with you and reading everything you write. you make me smile when i see you on my dash, with every response you send. jlin (bratkook): i slid into your tumblr dms because you’re so talented and so awfully pretty. i absolutely enjoy our conversations about rich folxs and karens, and i really hope the pandemic comes to an end because i would love to meet you in person and teach you aerial! (also i will bake you lots of cookies) erin (yeojaa): hi lovely. i adore you to the moon and back and to be honest, you still intimidate me because i love your writing so much, but i wanted to say how much i adore you and how i love talking to you. i hope you’re taking care of yourself and staying warm and i hope to get to know you better in 2021!
notes: adapted from lj, where i started writing! i used to see this a bit on lj (or maybe it was the circle of writers i followed) but i figured i’d bring it over here because it’s a good reflection piece and tumblr feels like a good place for that.
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officer down | jjk
pairing: jeon Jungkook | reader
genre: boyfriend!au - cryptid hunter!jk (kinda) | fluff, comedy
warnings: none
premise: When a mysterious creature leaves footprints in the snow, it’s up to you and Jungkook to investigate who, or what, it was.
word count: 1.6k
a/n: this is completely based on my own experience from today. and although I've changed my pets’ names for their protection, all of this actually happened to me. you know, except for Jungkook being there. also this is unedited, yadda yadda.
For the past five minutes, you had planted yourself in front of your window, curiously staring out at the sight before you. Your boyfriend, who at times you couldn’t tell if he was 21 or 12, was hunched over a curious footprint in the snow coating your backyard.
Not ten minutes earlier, you heard Jungkook screaming your name from the living room, completely ignoring the fact that you were doing the laundry down the hall. You sighed and walked to join him at your back door. You took in the sight of him; his eyes wide open and his mouth hanging open. “Do you see those prints?” Your eyes followed where his finger was pointing. The numerous animal tracks covering your back yard unsurprisingly interesting your boyfriend.
“Yes, it was probably a deer, Guk.” You sighed, already expecting where this conversation was going.
“Yeah, I guess it could be a deer if its legs were 5 feet tall!” Jungkook scoffed, feigning disdain toward your statement. “What if it’s him, y/n?”
“Oh no.”
“Don’t ‘oh no’ me! It could be Bigfoot, you can’t disprove the theory!” Jungkook turned to you, a boyish glint in his eyes. His smile appeared as if it was asking for your permission to inspect the tracks. Like you would say no to him.
“Go investigate, then, but I need to finish folding the towels!” You smiled at his gleeful laugh as he ran down the hall. A few loud crashes coming from the closet as Jungkook stumbled to get his snow gear on signaled his excitement to get outside. God, you were in love with such a dork.
You and your dog stood watching Jungkook examine the prints for a few minutes, and when your 10-year-old mutt begins to whine at the sight of her favorite person, you knew what you had to do. “Alright, Opal, let’s go join the investigation!”
The closet looked like a tornado had swept through it. You couldn’t help the giggle that escaped your lips at your boyfriends antics and made an attempt to sift through the winter gear laying on the floor. Eventually, you managed to find your snow pants, boots, a hat, and a mismatched pair of gloves. Clumsily, you got your self dressed and clumped your way toward the front door to grab your coat. As soon as you and your elderly beagle managed to make it outside, you catch sight of Jungkook leaping through the snow. To the best of your ability, you run across the yard to meet him, Opal hot on your trail. “So, Agent Jeon, how’s the investigation going?”
“Well, Agent y/l/n, it appears that the perp, allegedly the infamous Bigfoot, has an extremely wide tread. A bi-pedal organism that would’ve left these track would have been like, 7-foot tall, at least!”
“I see, I see. That is a sound thought process, but unfortunately, I think there’s a flaw in your theory, Agent.”
“And what might that be?” You turn your head to your beagle, witnessing her unceremoniously shoving her face into the snow. You and Jungkook couldn’t help but laugh at her ostrich-like antics. “Agent Opal seems to think that my theory is sound.” Jungkook indignantly points toward your dog with a pout on his face.
“If this were, in fact, Bigfoot, don’t you think he would have, I dunno, big feet? These prints look like they’re about a size 4, Guk.” You place your hand on his shoulder as he looks back down at the prints, his mouth hanging open once again.
“Well, I uhm,” a crease formed in between his eyebrows with a mixture of thought and disappointment. Jungkook didn’t necessarily believe in Bigfoot, he was an adult after all, but it had been a boring weekend, and this was something fun to do and an excuse to get outside. He probably thought that your comments were your way of telling him you were done with the little game and ready to go back inside. You knew what you had to do.
“We still don’t have enough evidence to make any conclusions on the case, so I guess we should investigate further,” You smirked at him, and a smile spread across his face.
“That sounds like a great plan, Agent,” just then, his gloved hand reached down to grasp your own, and you three, Opal included, made your way toward the woods, walking alongside the mysterious prints.
“Okay, we’ve been tracking this ‘creature’ around in a giant circle for almost 20 minutes, maybe we should analyze the clues we’ve gathered and formulate a theory inside, hm?” You looked up at Jungkook. Your little “investigation” had been interrupted by two snowball fights and an impromptu wrestling match between your boyfriend and your dog, to say that the cold weather was beginning to get to you was an understatement.
“Are you getting cold?” Jungkooks eyebrows drew together with concern. Reaching his gloved hand up to boop the red tip of your nose. You giggled at that and grabbed his hand, pulling him in the direction of your house.
You looked to your left when you heard a loud squeal, immediately recognizing the noise as your cat's strange meow. The snow was so deep that only the top of his back and head stuck out as he pushed his way toward you. Opal met Lucifer halfway in his route to you and Jungkook, nearly pushing him over when she went to sniff him. You laughed at the interaction between your pets, Opal’s cataracts making her depth perception terrible. You were surprised that her arthritic joints allowed her to “investigate” for this long. You and Jungkook continued walking in the direction of your house, seeing it nearing through the clearing in the trees.
Your cat and dog managed to catch up to you two, Lucifer rubbing up against your leg as you walked. You nearly tripped over the creature and cursed as you stumbled in the deep snow. You reached down toward your cat, hoping that by picking him up, you would be less likely to fall flat on your face. Right before you were able to wrap your arms around him, Lucifer bounded off toward your house, and you and Jungkook stopped in your tracks to watch what had just unfolded in front of you. From where your cat had leaped and landed again, he left behind an imprint in the snow. That imprint happened to match the mysterious tracks you and your bigfoot-hunting boyfriend had been investigating.
You looked up to meet his wide eyes, a smile growing on his face. “AHA! I’ve solved the case!”
“You?” You cried out incredulously. “If it weren’t for me trying to pick him up, we would’ve never known!”
Jungkook’s lips curled into a cocky smirk as he grasped your hand and began walking toward the house once again. “Whatever you have to tell yourself to sleep at night, Agent y/l/n.”
Once you make it to your door and you kick the side of the house to free your boots of snow. “Wait, where’s Opal?” Jungkook turns around and you follow suit, scanning over your back yard. All of the exercise and excitement from playing in the snow had finally gotten to your elderly pooch, as she had decided to sit down in the snow. The fact that it was below freezing outside meaning nothing to your dog as she panted.
Your eyes met Jungkook and you're sure he caught the playful glint in your eyes when you began running toward Opal. “Officer down! I repeat, we have an officer down!” You could hear Jungkook’s giggle as he chased after you toward your dog. Throwing your body into the snow next to Opal, you wrapped your arms around her as you yelled, “We need a medic!”
“You’ve watched way too many episodes of Criminal Minds, dork,” Jungkook giggled at your antics. You released your dog and pulled Jungkook down by his knees, his body flopping into the soft snow next to you. He managed to turn his body over before you straddled his snowsuit-clad body. As he looked up at you, you placed your hands on his chest.
“I’m sorry you didn’t catch Bigfoot, but we did solve the mystery!” You smiled and Jungkook placed his arms around your back, pulling your torso to lay on top of his. He strained his neck to bring his nose up to your own, giving you an Eskimo kiss. You couldn’t help but chuckle at your boyfriend.
“Yeah, I guess we did. I couldn’t have done it without my sidekick… Opal!” Jungkook’s hands left you cheeks to pet your dog still laying in the snow next to you two.
“Hey! What about me, brat!” You playfully hit his chest, your bottom lip stuck out in a pout. Jungkook returns his attention to you and places his hand back on your cheek. Your heart flutters as he holds eye-contact with you. Regardless of how long you were together, he always had the ability to make you swoon. You leaned down as he lifted his head, you two meeting in the middle. Your lips melted together in a sweet kiss. Just when Jungkook was beginning to deepen the kiss, Opal decided she had enough of the PDA and swatted her paw at Jungkook’s sleeve.
He broke the kiss with a chuckle and looked at your dog. “Alright puppy, let’s go inside!” He looked back up at you just then. “As for you, Agent y/l/n, we’ll continue this in the house,” Jungkook smirked at you and you stood up with your feet on either side of him. Before he could even stand, you took off running toward your door, only turning around to shout at him.
“Race you inside, loser!” As he sat up and watched you clumsily scurry through the snow, he couldn’t help but smile. You really were his soulmate.
© alluremin 2019
no reposting
#bts fluff#bts drabbles#bts scenarios#bts fanfic#bts imagines#bts#bts boyfriend#jeon jungkook#jungkook#bts jungkook#Jungkook fluff#Jungkook scenario#Jungkook drabble#Jungkook imagine#Jungkook x reader#boyfriend!jungkook#cryptid hunter!jk#bts x reader
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Reds, Spaces, and Signs
Synopsis | Jeon Jungkook does the good ol' prepping up his girlfriend with ice cream and movies to help her through her red days. The only difference is, you're actually his girl-space-friend and he hopes that someday, you may eliminate that space between you. Lucky for him, you may do so tonight. Pairing | Jungkook x reader Genre | Flufffy dy fluffy dy fluff Wordcount | 1.9k
A/N | This is somehow related to the request so yeah…I hope you enjoy this anon as much as I enjoyed writing this while having a terrible red day. Thank you so much for loving this drabble series!
Read more of football!jk drabbles in The Prince and His Rose
By the sound of a small 'ding!' and the sight of your name on his notification bar, Jungkook is already crouching down, tying his shoelaces to prep his fifty meter dash to your dorm.
Saturday 7:15 PM
Otor-nim Y/N: Kook, I need you to do the biggest favor of the month.
Otor-nim Y/N: I need long ass pads. I can't fucking move. The satanic waterfalls between my legs is furious as hell. It rained on my pads so bad.
Otor-nim Y/N: And yeah, I can't damn move.
Past him would be totally cringing by now, begrudgingly stomping to the grocery to grab what you need and chunk them all to you on your couch before going out of the door without even a goodbye. However current him is different. Current him is much cooler and manly than past him. Current him is more gentlemanlike and more mature than past him. And current him is in love with you.
Being his bestfriend for so many years, you have dealt with his too-many-to-count nonsense comebacks, childish competitiveness, annoying shenanigans, and stupid misadventures. You've helped him find his dream of playing football, tutored him for free on his difficult subjects, and...okay you've always been there to bring him back to rationality whenever he's about to do one of the stupidest things you’ll soon put down in a book titled Jungkook's Endless Shits. You even sit and wait on the bleachers for him to finish his night practices whenever you can just so you can go home together. You've also stayed up with him countless of nights, pressing down ice packs on his sore legs when he's done with long trainings and big matches on the field since high school. By now, it's obvious that he should return the favor, right? Growing up with you ever since he's a troublesome six-year-old, the idea of you being completely stuck by his side till you both grow old has already embedded itself on his head. Although back then, he meant living in a nice house in the future with your own house just across or beside his, your own families growing close to each other. Right now, however, he imagines you being with him inside his own house and building your own family. So knowing you’re one of the women who’s got the worst dysmenorrheas ever, of course, he's gotta take care of you so you'll still be alive when the day he'll finally be a man to confess these stuff to you - Okay, this is complete nonsense, so anyway-
Saturday 7:16 PM
Star Kook: on my way
Otor-nim Y/N: Thank you, Kook! Oh and bring that film Tae is Talking about.
Star Kook: Love, Rosie?
Otor-nim Y/N: Yesssss
Star Kook: Okay
Otor-nim Y/N: Have I ever told u that I LuV Ya??????
Star Kook: Ew.
Oh god, does he wish you mean that. Please bless his rampaging heart.
//
Three knocks were made against the door before Jungkook uses the spare key of your room you gave to him. At the sound of your door unlocking, you look up from your haphazard state of your right leg laid on your couch and the other on the floor.
You pull yourself to see him. "Heya Kook! That was...fast."
"Yeah, what do you expect from me?" He gives you a smug smile, walking to your couch to land his butt alogside yours with a plop. He wouldn’t tell you that he actually spent a long ass time deciphering the best brand of pads in the convenience store. "You know I'll always be fast. It's the Jeon Effect."
The stink eye you're giving him made him lean back and release a loud guffaw. You're probably slapping his face in your head.
"Here's the pads. And yeah. I bought you ice cream and Chinese takeout."
"Really?!" You turn your body towards him, eyes bright.
Jungkook smiles, eyes mimicking the crescents of the moon. God, even if your hair has yet to feel the bristles of your brush, even if you look so pale with no make-up on, even if you practically look like death in front of him, you look so beautiful.
Jungkook clears his throat. "Yeah, really. Now sit down. I'll grab us some spoons, then we'll watch the movie. What do you wanna eat first? Ice cream or the take out?"
"Hmm...I'll go with ice cream."
"As always. Dessert before the main course."
You chuckle as you return his grin. "Dessert before the main course."
Ten minutes later into Love Rosie, you've already curled up on your couch, head now placed on your bestfriend’s lap when a few minutes prior it was settled on the crook of his neck and shoulder. The rhythmic feeling of Jungkook’s fingers carding through your locks was probably the culprit. Anyway, it was only then that you seemed to remember something.
“Kook…”
“Yeah?” Jungkook stops the movements of his fingers, angling his face towards you.
“I forgot to grab our map.”
“Oh yeah, okay just sit there. I’ll get it,” he says, immediately grabbing a pillow to place under your head as he scamper to your room.
The map was easy to find. It’s folded on top of your bed, a blanket studded with colorful stars that have already faded hues through age. While it wasn’t the prettiest fabric, your blanket has served its purpose of providing you comfort and warm, even actually beyond what a blanket could provide. He remembers the seven-year-old you who claimed that this blanket wasn’t a blanket but a map – his and your map to the worlds your creative mind has planned and put into ink on paper. The stories you created grew and grew that you have to immortalize them into something tangential, something real for the fictitious tales you colored his and your life with.
It took six years in high school before Jungkook realized that this blanket was not just a map for the Emerald Prince’s Kingdom, for the Empire of the Dandelion Lions, or for your favorite Golden Prince and his quest to reunite with his Rose. It was a blanket that always mapped his way back to his home when he ran away and you and your blanket were the only ones that accompanied him that lonely night, back to his self when you covered him in its fabric after one cold night after playing football for the very first time, and back to you when he suddenly avoided you for weeks because of the romantic feelings that grew in his ribcaged heart and all it took was one tearful night and your blanket over your heads to see you, your eyes, and the probability of him balancing the gravitational differences between your hearts. Two years have passed and Jungkook thinks his quest for your affections have also been fruitful, if the pink blush on your cheeks whenever he does surprise bear hugs and uncalled gifts were indicators of that. Anyway, Jungkook is yet to give up. He’s got more years to pour his love for you to make up for his lost chances in the previous years.
Jungkook makes his way back to you, unfolding the blanket before draping it on your shoulders. He goes back to his seat and settles your head back on his lap. You grab his right hand to put it on your tresses and at the sound of your relieved sigh when he plays with your hair again, he chuckles. “You really like me playing with your hair, huh?”
“Shut up, Kook.”
Jungkook laughs. “I’m going to buy you a starry pajamas set when your birthday comes.”
“Way to break the surprise, Jeon. Anyway, you know I’ll only wear them when you got a set that matches it so you better buy yourself one too. Who knows you’re planning to make me look hideous again.”
“Of course, Y/N, we have to look horrible together, I’ll make sure of that.” Jungkook doesn’t reply to your huffs of “how about you look hideous without dragging me into your stupid shits” and just tells you to focus on the movie.
An hour and forty minutes later, the credits were rolling and Jungkook could feel your soft even breaths. He turns off the TV before crouching down to pick you up in his arms, blanket still draped on your body. You instantly snuggle into the warmth of his arms, the tip of your nose grazes the soft flesh of his neck, making him shudder.
He sets you on your bed and tucks you comfortably in your blanket. However as he draws back to give you a good night kiss on your forehead you’ll never know off anytime soon, your right hand shoots out and grabs his, immediately sending a thousand electric bolts running rushing through his veins, from your cold hand, the fact you’re actually awake, or the possibility of him almost caught red handed, he doesn’t know.
“Kook, y’know, Rosie and Alex are kinda stupid.”
Oh, you’re talking about the film. Jungkook opts to sit on your bed. He doesn’t have it in himself to let your hand go. “Hmm…yeah, why is that?”
“I don’t know…I mean, they had so many chances to just be brave and say what they felt to each other? They would have…y’know, don’t get through those stupid misunderstandings and conflicts when they just…said it aloud. Ya’get me?”
Jungkook nods and squeezes your hand. He doesn’t know why, but it felt like a personal attack. All these things he’s been doing, all these staged fronts he pulls up just to keep his cool and not act like he’s actually whipped by you – yeah, they’re kinda stupid. But–
You flutter your eyelashes at him and let a smile spread on your face. “I know I’m blabbing trash. Anyway, thank you for keeping me company and helping me with my shitty day…yeah…and I hope you won’t go stupid too and just say upfront whatever you’re feeling.”
Before Jungkook lets your words sink in, he feels a pair of soft lips land on the apples of his cheek, so fast as if a butterfly fluttered past him. Jungkook’s mouth falls open, his hand on his cheek frozen as he turns to look at you, head now ducked beneath your covers.
“Y-Y/N–“
“That’s all. G’night, Kook.”
“O-okay. G’night.”
Only when Jungkook closes your door does he hear a faint “Love you,” and before he lets his imaginations take control again, he dismisses them and treks back to his dorm.
Maybe it was all a dream, maybe it was real, but all Jungkook knows, this is a sign, and he sure as hell will not take it for granted. As soon as he reaches his room, he immediately pulls the familiar pink stationery, and the iconic golden crown tape you always find in the love letters addressed to you in your locker. For the very first time, Jeon Jungkook will be honest with everything now. No more pretenses–just him and you, and the reality of his feelings.
“Dear Princess,
It’s time for me to introduce myself. I’m Jeon Jungkook, your childhood friend, and bestfriend for more than ten years, and the Little Prince who’s been sending you love letters for the past six months.”
So…Did you give her the letter?
Not yet, Hyung.
Why?
It’s not the right time, Tae…I-I gotta have the time right.
But I thought you’ll court her for real now?!
I’m self-contradictory, hyung, okay? I’m stupid, I know. I just-ugh! I just gotta wait…ease my way out of the friend zone, then I’ll send her the letter.
Okay, If you say so.
I will, hyung, I’m sure. Very soon.
A/N pt. 2 | Is this a sign hons? HAHAHAHHA don’t worry, TPAHR won’t be ending anytime soon. I’ve still got loads of stuff planned for this drabble series. Anyway, enjoy the suspense. Feedback is always appreciated! Thank you for the support you’ve all been giving me! I love you, hons!
All Rights Reserved © Vanaera. No reposts, modifications, and translations of content are allowed without direct permission.
#bangtanarmynet#kwritersworldnet#bangtan bookclub#btsguild#the prince and his rose#tpahr#jungkook scenarios#bts scenarios#bts x you#jungkook x you#jeon jungkook#bts#bangtan#bangtan seonyeondan#request
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Kouda and Bakugou hcs bc I went Feral!!!!!!!
Once Bakugou had his pride out of the way, around 2nd year or so, he finally started noticing good traits beside 'powerful' in his classmates.
So it wasn't long before he noticed Kouda's kindness, and his quiet, gentle nature. He also noticed his anxiety around others, and immediately related.
He didn't exactly work to become friends with the other, but he kinda...stumbled into it. He has a small garden on the balcony of his room, where he keeps mostly spices, fruits, and vegetables that can be potted, but some pretty flowers or ones with meanings he liked, too. (If we're going with the idea that he knows flower language pretty well; which is one of my own hcs for Bakugou, considering the expression it brings, and just the fact that flowers are pretty, and Bakugou can indulge. (Also I like flowers, so shush.)) One day, one of Kouda's little bunnies stumbled on in, and he welcomed it with the leaves he could find. Kouda stumbled on after it, and after apologizing, asked if he could start hanging out up there every now and then. Bakugou said 'sure, but only if you bring a cat next time'.
They didn't really talk all that much, but they started to get used to each other's mannerisms, and just hung around more in class in general. Their quirks weren't very compatible, but they ended up working out some cool moves. Plus, it helped that Kouda and Bakugou were one of the few people in the class to know sign language, so they talked that way when Bakugou really wasn't in the mood. His little group of dorks were always really loud, and eve though Bakugou liked them, sometimes he just needed a break.
Kouda is also just a really good listener. Bakugou may not talk often, but Kouda is extremely trustworthy, and Bakugou just somehow finds it easy to talk to him, eventually. So he ends up talking to him a lot about his flowers, and some stories-usually about the others doing stupid shit, or Midoriya being dumb when he was young. Kouda would talk to him about his animals whenever he asked; Bakugou would usually ask about the ones he thought were cool, really, and occasionally some cute ones, but Kouda was happy to talk either way, and Bakugou himself was a pretty good listener.
Eventually, Bakugou just found himself amazed by Kouda's kindness. In situations where Bakugou just couldn't understand what was wrong, or couldn't understand how to comfort someone, Kouda just...knew. He was also just excellent with animals of all kinds, and there was something about his gentleness that captivated him.
And Kouda? Kouda admired his strength, and determination. He was so firm in his beliefs, and it was amazing to him. He was so funny underneath his angry exterior, too. And it was amazing watching him open up, too. He was just prouder by the day as he loosened up, almost as proud as the Bakusquad was, having been there from the start. (Sometimes he asked them about developments he missed, just to know.) And once Bakugou opened up almost all the way, he started saying things that revealed that he wasn't as proud of himself as he showed he was. It was little things, those proclamations that he sounded so sure in, like 'since it was my fault' in situations where it definitely WASN'T, where Kouda just had to go 'hey? What the FUCK?' and it made Bakugou laugh, because Kouda never curses, and then he stopped because 'oh shit Kouda never curses'. And then he was lowkey worried like 'shit Kouda never gets angry,,,,um??' And after Kouda realized that Bakugou was lowkey Scared, he quickly backpedaled. 'Oh-I didn't mean it like that! I'm not mad at you! I'm just...mad at whoever taught you that would be your fault when it was out of your control.' And Bakugou was confused, but Kouda calmly explained, and Bakugou may have started crying, but Kouda swore he'd convince him it wasn't a bad thing one day, and they cried together on his balcony with a cat in their laps.
They just...slowly fell in love, I guess. They just started gravitating towards each other, and eventually fell, one for his kind heart and one for his strong one. They didn't really notice until someone mentioned that they were literally leaning on each other and then they got Embarrassed so they leaned apart and stopped talking bc 'o shit wa it??' but after a few days their friends noticed-the Bakusquad and Shouji and Tokoyami, maybe-and went 'hey what's up??' and they finally decided they needed to talk, so Bakugou took the first step and tapped Kouda's arm that day at lunch, and signed, 'meet me at the balcony'. And Kouda shakily nodded back, before Bakugou frowned and tapped him again. 'Calm down. It's nothing bad, alright? We just...need room to talk.' He paused. 'Go ahead and bring toffee. I like him.' Kouda smiled at that and nodded. Toffee was a little orange tabby that Bakugou really liked; it was one of the few cats that lived in the dorns, since pets were actually technically allowed but Kouda didn't like keeping them all inside unless they had gotten particularly attached to him (or Bakugou).
And so, that evening, they had a Conversation-mostly in sign, after Bakugou realized he was too nervous to really talk right-and blushed the whole damn time. At some point, Bakugou absolutely gave him a rose and some flowers that meant things like kindness and quiet nature. They ended the night just leaning on each other like always, Toffee in their laps and the flowers woven into Bakugou's hair at Kouda's insistence.
Eventually, Bakugou would express that he had no clue why Kouda liked him. Kouda stopped him right fucking there, and accidently talked while protesting, and accidently said his first name. He was embarrassed as hell, but Bakugou took it in stride.
And of course, Kouda had his own worries, and expressed them not much later. Bakugou made his own stop to it, calling him 'Kouji' on purpose, and grabbing another rose and settling it in his lap again for good measure.
They have their own little quirks in their relationship, too. They both like the sound of Bakugou's little tiny explosions, and Kouda likes how they look. Says they look like tiny stars.
Bakugou doesn't smile smile too terribly often, especially around others, but Kouda loves doing whatever he possibly can to make one appear on his face. He thinks it's absolutely adorable when he talks about flowers or heroes or his quirk; all the things he really loves.
Bakugou thinks Kouda's smile is as sweet as the first flower he had ever grown. It makes him feel like he accomplished something, seeing it appear. Kouda's smiles are usually shy, but when he gets to talking about his favorite animals and their psychology, or he's really laughing, it's so bright, and Bakugou swears he would kill someone to keep it there.
Eventually, Kouda walks in on Bakugou having a nightmare. He was coming by to grab a notebook he left there-they study together, every now and then-and walked in to see Bakugou's body and face scrunched up and smoke trailing from his palms where they were situated firmly on his upper arm. Realizing that probably meant trouble, he did his best to wake him up. Luckily, Kouda did it gently enough that he didn't get blasted or anything when he shot up in bed, palms out and ready to murder with blurry eyes. Kouda lightly tapped him and whispered, as loud as he could, "are you alright?" Shocked out of his stupor his boyfriend's rarely spoken voice, Bakugou quickly broke down into sobs. Kouda just did everything he could to keep him calm as his sobs died down. 'Do you want to talk about it?' Bakugou paused, and shook his head. He opened his mouth but decided otherwise. 'No. ...I'll tell you another time.' 'You never have to tell me if you don't want to, Katsuki.' He smiled weakly back, and Kouda frowned at his arms. 'I've got to get something to fix that though. Do you have a first aid kit?' He nodded. 'Bathroom.' Kouda left and got it as quickly as he could, finding Bakugou lightly picking at the wounds and looking at scars surrounding them. 'Does this...happen often?' Bakugou hummed. 'Yeah. I can't control my quirk very well when I'm freaking out.' Kouda paused. 'I'll keep that in mind.' And got to work. After the bandaged had been addressed, Bakugou nervously asked him if he could stay the night. Kouda immediately agreed, and they usually slept together from then on.
Bakugou will absolutely give him random bouquets or flowers whose meanings remind him of him, that Kouda just likes, or that Bakugou thinks fit his like...personality, even if their meaning don't match. He'll always explain each one when Kouda asks.
One day, Kouda sasses to him about some shitty kid in a other class that he highkey HATES and it makes Bakugou fucking DI E laughing bc 'OH MY GOD KOUJI YOU NEVER SASS HOLY SH IT-DO IT MORE THIS IS GRE AT-' and everyone else is just CONFUSED and the Bakusquad plus Midoriya is just REALLY happy because Bakugou!! Is Smiling!!!!!!! Oh my God!!!!!!!!!!!
Some of them (including Kouda( may or may not take pics
Bakugou legit DOES NOT CARE bc he's too damm busy laughing at Kouda's sass
If someone asks, they'll just straight up say they're dating. They're not one bit shy about it.
Appreciate these good boys with me or I will be FORCED to steal your kneecaps!!!!!!
(Jk but they're still rlly good so like,,,,,Consider please)
#skdkdkd this took so long bc i just kept adding o n u kno?#i really went full feral on this shit#i have never thought of this before and here i am.....hecc#ive never even really thought of kouda even. but i have been hardcore missing out a top teir good bou havent i#bnha#bnha headcanons#trash talks#bakugou katsuki#kouda kouji#bakukouda#?? maybe???? theres not much of a shipname for them#bakugou x kouda
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1-100.. bitch
oh FUCK you (im jk.. i love you..)
The meaning behind my url: i love french, and so i wanted to spice up my url and have it not be sims related from the get-go (my previous url was ughplumb). at first i wanted my url to be “cherry wine” in french because my favorite song of all time is cherry wine by hozier, however the url was already taken. i settled for rosy honey, hence rosymiel
A picture of me: honestly just look at my tag “kyla has a face”! i don’t have any new selfies of myself aside from what i’ve posted.
How many tattoos i have and what they are: i only have one, and it’s right in between my shoulder blades on my back. it’s of my family’s crest, which says “miseris succurrere disco”, which basically means to help people in need.
Last time i cried and why: last night because i was watching queer eye
Piercings i have: i used to have my ears pierced, but i hated keeping track of my earrings so i just let them close up. i wish i never let them close up, and now i also want to get my nose pierced
Favorite band: i don’t really listen to any bands, just artists!
Biggest turn offs: burping and chewing sounds. chewing sounds legitimately anger me so much, i don’t know why
Top 5 songs: Cherry Wine (Hozier), Rain On Me (Joji), IDFC (Blackbear), I Love You (Billie Eilish), The Night We Met (Lord Huron)
Tattoos I want: OHHHHH MY GOD i want so many!!!! i just honestly want my body to be covered in flower tattoos to the point that i’m just a walking garden!! i really want to get a pair of watercolor roses or lilies right under my collarbones!!
Biggest turn ons: good cologne. i don’t know why, but cologne makes me go insane, i love it so much
Age: 18 going on 19!
Ideas of a perfect date: relaxing at home and cuddling with my boyfriend while watching our favorite show
Life goal: oh god this is super deep and i’ve sat on this question for a fat minute and all i can think about is how much i want to be content with myself, so i guess that’s my goal
Piercings i want: nose and ear piercings, babie!!!
Relationship status: happily taken!
Favorite movie: oh god, probably across the universe. i’ve loved it ever since i was a kid
A fact about my life: i’ve been in choir almost all my life
Phobia: the dark. when i was a kid i used to see faces on my walls when my room was dark
Middle name: marie
Height: 5′5.5 (basically just 5′6)
Are you a virgin?: yessirree
What’s your shoe size?: 7
What’s your sexual orientation?: i’m pretty straight, but i think i’m heteroflexible. i’d definitely get down and nasty with a girl, but i’ve never felt any romantic attraction towards females
Do you smoke, drink, or take any drugs?: no, my parents smoked cigarettes for most of my life, and my dad regularly smokes weed. the smell of weed makes my head hurt and makes me feel nauseous, so no thanks.
Someone you miss: my boyfriend. he’s been on a family trip to cuba, and he hasn’t contacted anyone (including me) in almost 10 days. i miss him so much that it genuinely hurts.
What’s one thing you regret?: not learning to love myself sooner and finding comfort in feeling depressed because it’s something familiar
First celebrity you think of when someone says attractive: zendaya
Favorite ice cream?: i don’t eat a whole lot of ice cream, so i guess cookies and cream
One insecurity: my teeth. my two teeth next to my front teeth are pointed, and i used to get called a vampire when i was young. i was always bullied for it, and for most of my life i would cover my mouth with my hand whenever i laughed or smiled. a recent incident that comes to mind was sophomore year in high school in my english class. i sat next to my friend mooney (i called her by her last name because we met in gym), and one day she was talking to the guy infront of her about how pretty she thought i was, and how she thought that i could’ve been a model. the guy who sat in front of me, who’s name was tristan and was also in my choir the previous year, said that i’d be pretty with me if my teeth weren’t so fucked up.
What my last text message says: “god this fan feels so nice”
Have you ever taken a picture naked?: :)
Have you ever painted your room?: no, but i’ve tried painting the bathroom with my mom
Have you ever kissed a member of the same sex?: nope
Have you ever slept naked?: yeah?????????
Have you ever danced in front of your mirror?: i can’t dance, so absolutely not
Have you ever had a crush?: yeah??!??!?!!? ofc. i had a major crush on my current boyfriend, and he had a crush on me first before we started dating. it’s actually a really cute story
Have you ever been dumped?: yeah, twice. my last one was really brutal, but not because of how he dumped me.
Have you ever stole money from a friend?: nope
Have you ever gotten in a car with people you just met?: nope
Have you ever been in a fist fight?: nope
Have you ever snuck out of your house?: nah, i’m a goody-two-shoes
Have you ever had feelings for someone who didn’t have them back?: oh HELL yeah
Have you ever been arrested?: nope, and not planning on it!
Have you ever made out with a stranger?: nope!!
Have you ever met up with a member of the opposite sex somewhere?: not in a sexual or romantic way, no
Have you ever left your house without telling your parents?: nah
Have you ever had a crush on your neighbor?: i don’t think so??
Have you ever ditched school to do something more fun?: i ditched my nesika (which was like homeroom, but only two days of the week rather than daily) to go to a coffee stand with a friend
Have you ever slept in a bed with a member of the same sex?: not in a sexual or romantic way
Have you ever seen someone die?: no, and i really don’t want to :^(
Have you ever been on a plane?: yup!! i love it
Have you ever kissed a picture?: maybe…………… :’^)
Have you ever slept in until 3?: oh my GOD no. i fall asleep relatively early and wake up early, even on my days off.
Have you ever loved someone or miss someone right now?: yeah??? lowkey this question is phrased in a weird way
Have you ever laid on your back and watched cloud shapes go by?: oh my god yes, it’s so relaxing
Have you ever made a snow angel?: yup!!!!
Have you ever played dress up?: oh HELL yes i have!!!
Have you ever cheated while playing a game?: okay does anyone remember doing the stock market game in freshmen year/middle school in history class? my friend and i looked up the answers online and cheated. we were rich that day in that class.
Have you ever been lonely?: i’m lonely right now
Have you ever fallen asleep at work/school?: maybe for 10 seconds, but no
Have you ever been to a club?: nope!
Have you ever felt an earthquake?: i don’t think so, no
Have you ever touched a snake?: SDKJGBSD NO!!!!!
Have you ever ran a red light?: nope!
Have you ever been suspended from school?: nope!!!!
Have you ever had detention?: i had lunch detention for saying “stfu” to a guy who was bugging me in 5th grade. i thought i was the shit for that.
Have you ever been in a car accident?: nope!
Have you ever hated the way you look?: 100%. i’ve always had huge insecurities surrounding my body or how i look.
Have you ever witnessed a crime?: bruh i literally stole a pack of gum from a store when i was 4. i COMMITTED a crime. in my defense, i stole it for my mom to make her happy. i got yelled at
Have you ever pole danced?: nope, but i would love to! it looks like a really good workout!
Have you ever been lost?: i got lost just last week
Have you ever been to the opposite side of the country?: nope!!! i don’t travel much
Have you ever felt like dying?: yes. i used to be suicidal
Have you ever cried yourself to sleep?: hell yeah babie!
Have you ever sang karaoke?: i sing karaoke on youtube almost every single day. not only that, but on the first day of practicing for my high school graduation i stopped by my choir class before it began (seniors got out earlier than everyone else), and i sang karaoke with them.
Have you ever done something you told yourself you wouldn’t?: 100%
Have you ever laughed until something you were drinking came out your nose?: NO?!?!?!?!?!?!?
Have you ever slept with someone at least 5 years older or younger?: no
Have you ever kissed in the rain?: how can u kiss the rain. bruh.
Have you ever sang in the shower?: i sang in the shower earlier today
Have you ever made out in a park?: nope!
Have you ever dream that you married someone?: yep!!!!
Have you ever glued your hand to something?: i don’t think so????
Have you ever got your tongue stuck to a flag pole?: no, but i got my tongue stuck to one of those metal low monkey bar things.
Have you ever gone to school partially naked?: no?????
Have you ever been a cheerleader?: no, but my childhood friend and i wanted to be cheerleaders in high school before i moved to a different state
Have you ever sat on a roof top?: nope
Have you ever brushed your teeth?: who are you, my mom?
Have you ever been too scared to watch scary movies alone?: oh my GOD yes
Have you ever played chicken?: nope!! im a pussy
Have you ever been pushed into a pool with all your clothes on?: nope!
Have you ever been told you’re hot by a complete stranger?: not that i’m hot, but i’ve gotten many compliments from strangers
Have you ever broken a bone?: nope!
Have you ever been easily amused?: i used to be one of those kids that would laugh before they could finish a joke
Have you ever laughed so hard you cried?: i’ve laughed so hard that i’ve pissed myself. so yes.
Have you ever mooned/flashed someone?: i mean????
Have you ever cheated on a test?: i cheated on a 2nd grade spelling test. who knew that i would end up actually being great at spelling shit
Have you ever forgotten someone’s name?: oh my god i have the worst memory and i’m terrible with names
Have you ever met someone who didn’t seem real?: my boyfriend :’’’’^)
Give us one thing about you that no one knows: a couple friends know, but when i’m too lazy to throw on shoes or socks to walk around the house i just pull my sweatpants legs a bit over my feet and just wrap it around my feet. it’s weird
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I'm curious but why did you delete JAM? It was one of my favorite JxD fics and I never got to finish reading it.
ahhhh oh dear, yeah, that happened.
So, for everyone arriving, I wrote a fic called Just Another Mission for the Jak and Daxter game series, and Jak/Daxter pairing. Yes, the green haired elf protag with the fuzzy orange thing, which btw used to be a human and was a human in fic. I think I started it when I was maybe 14 (yikes omg) and a few years ago, I deleted it, and I don’t delete fics.
Rant and personal history ahead, but tldr; i deleted this particular fic because:
1) I became more and more uncomfortable with the way I’d treated certain characters without giving them respect or resolution (throwing around things like domestic abuse while being too young to properly understand What I Was Doing or How to Answer Very Triggered Friends Who Had the Misfortune of Reading This I’m So Goddamn Sorry, as well as falling into that Not Like Other Girls slash fan ditch of treating female characters like shit/obstacles to the main pairing WHICH IS JUST ******) as well as personally uncomfortable portrayals of obsession and taking advantage of people that turn my stomach to this day (see reason 4)
2) i got way in over my head with my own writing/style which was so obtuse and self-indulgent that I felt a great amount of shame over it, including the attention it had gotten, and the way it went to my head and turned me into an egotistic little shit. I was an asshole peacock and I regret it. There was a break where I got waylaid before the final confrontation in the fic (see reason 4, also a very bad time to get held up in any narrative) and when I returned to the story, i nearly cried because it was such a mess and I didn’t know what I was saying anymore. Finishing it was a struggle and I even remember one JnD fan friend being like “hey this chapter seemed really curt??? short?? not like you” and I was like YEAH THATS NOT ME ANYMORE god i hope
3) there was a sort of ... anti-JxD surge in my little pool from people I really respected and it made me think i was doing something wrong even just remembering it, so I cut off that memory.
4) it coincided with two ugly relationships in my life that marred it, and I just wanted it gone for my own mental health.
So anon, I’m very sorry that you never got to finish it. I had good intentions in mind and gave them a happy ending where they realized they loved each other, even if the journey there was difficult.
It both touched me and broke a piece of my heart when someone came to me years ago and asked me why I had deleted it, saying the story had given them the courage to come out as gay to their family. In that moment, overwhelmed with how ProblematicTM the whole story was, I was really struck with just ... how subjective our world experience is, and how so many things can mean so many different things to every single soul and how terrifyingly VALID peoples experiences are, no matter how they come by them. We’re all so unique and convoluted, one man’s trash is another man’s treasure -- and one man’s trigger is another man’s key to Becoming. But no matter how inspiring, I couldn’t bring myself to repost it.
Hopefully this will be the only fic i ever delete with relish. Jak and Daxter will always be a good memory for me, regardless. Thanks for the ask, anon.
(even more) personal stuff below the cut. tw for stalking, harassment, manipulation and emotional abuse.
So.
Im a firm believer in stories living beyond their authors (something that JK rowling doesnt seem to understand iykwim). I don’t normally delete past works, because while I wrote them, I also know that they’ve outgrown me as most narratives do: people are absolutely allowed to enjoy what they want to or need to, not just because I think said thing is reflective of my current work or jives with my current stage of life.
However, JAM was a particular Thing that Had to Go.
The timeline is hella fuzzy to me because I’ve blocked a lot of it out, but I was coming out of middle school and struggling with my mental health. On the real life side, I was stuck in a situation with a close friend of mine who was very fixated on us being in a relationship and the pining was loud enough to hear from the other side of the country. Wounded people pleaser that I was, I flipped (exhaustingly) back and forth between “i dont like you like that” and “but I want you to be happy so what if I tried liking you like that?” and there was massive amounts of hidden hurt and resentment and tension and abandonment complex activation and just ... a strangling of anything that made our friendship good for either of us.
Also she was a she. So. Yannoe, gay is difficult.
This definitely burnt me out on the “best friends pining” trope and is probably legit the ONLY reason I’m not equally in the erasermic and erasermight camp haha. That trope feels claustrophobic and draining to me, so I leave it for others to enjoy.
It also coincided with a married 45yo adult man luring me into a “platonic, ecstatic, boundary-breaking, you-are-my-beautiful-young-muse, words cannot express how much I love you” creative type relationship that inevitably turned possessive, domineering and manipulative. Within the bounds of the Renaissance Faire community, I thought he was a safe person and he was not, and his constant reassurance that I wasn’t like other women my age was absolutely hypnotizing to a undeveloped soul who really, really wanted to be special.
We traded poetry and tarot card readings over email. He bought me manga and shared stories about his time overseas and in the service. He made me props to go with my renaissance faire character and showed me where to find cheap leather so I could piece things together myself.
He also stalked me and owned me for the better part of a year and I only realized it once he started harassing a dear friend of mine overseas, whom I was visiting, about a package that he’d sent, which apparently he’d covered in original poetry to let me know how much he loved me But Not In a Hetero or Sexual Way Bro, so of course he didn’t want it to get lost in the postal system. So what is he going to do? Note my friend twice a day asking if its arrived until she inevitably, tearfully spills that this guy is stressing her out and who is he anyway?
My horrible secret was out, which only sounded horrible when I explained it to someone else. I realized this man was trying to follow me wherever i went and I got so fucking angry that he was messing with my friend that I had to stop it.
(He called me a cunt when I broke it off with him on the phone in the dark on the floor of my bedroom in the middle of the night so my parents wouldn’t hear, then sobbed and said he was sorry. I was so dissociated from the rush of anger and helplessness that it took for me to actually MAKE the call that all I could do was wiggle my foot and watch it in the reflection of the mirror on the back of my door, and think maybe I was a cunt but I wasn’t his cunt anymore. So there.
Afterward I slammed my forehead into the mirror a few times to make sure I’d actually done it and it wasn’t a dream.)
During all of this, I was writing this stupid fic. I think. Honestly, I don’t fucking know, but I can’t think of it without thinking of him and how i was devoured.
The stress of hiding this “totally wonderful but NORMAL PEOPLE DONT UNDERSTAND WHAT WE HAVE!!!!” grooming shit from my parents was gutting me alive, and I was so far gone RE: worthiness/autonomy that I didn’t even consider why I BOTHERED diffusing his petulant accusations over notes on deviantArt again and again as he baited me into shit just to explode over how I didn’t love him and I figured out another way to soothe his engorged and tarry ego without explicitly lying that I loved him too.
He made me regret my silver tongue and way with words as I used it to defend myself again and again, and crushed my love of writing. I would pace the neighborhood for almost an hour several times a week, claiming I was ‘exercising’ but really trying to understand why i felt so trapped, or where the lines between love and hate lay, or why I wanted to cry all the time, as i low key tried to get hit by a car just to force something to change in my life and jolt me out of his smothering, needy nightmare of constant texting and emails and notes. I couldn’t fucking flinch without him knowing about it, and asking me if I was okay. For this reason, I react very poorly to people fretting over me at length, and loudly. I get angry and feel violated, or just pinned to the floor by someone Performing their love on me with no real regard for my health.
This whole time, I was escaping into fandom. It probably saved my life, in one way or another, because I found friends who supported me and made me laugh in the JnD sphere. Especially the friend whose distress caused me to snap and realize This Couldn’t Continue.
This terrible man was the first one outside of my friend group that I showed my writing to, the first adult as well. It was on the dark side even then, but he said it was wonderful and amazing. He teased me for being stuck up in my authors notes on JAM (one of the reasons I’m just getting over ... talking ...) but said it inspired him to start writing as well. He used that writing to imagine hokey sprawling stories of him being a hot rod racer and me being his sexy girlfriend, Very Totally in Love. Why Couldn’t We have Just Met in a Different Lifetime??? not that its a relevant question for my young 16yo friend lol just something dreamers wonder lol lol here why don’t you take this traditional irish engagement ring aka claddagh i bought for you, lie to your parents and say I bought one for everyone in our renfaire group, and turn it toward your heart, to imply that you’re in love, so that I can keep your heart safe for you until you find a boyfriend?
FUCKER YOU ABSOLUTE FUCKER ok I’m done. Fuck.
JAM was a project of mine that spanned a year or two and is intrinsically tangled in those very bad relationships and very bad lessons. I deleted it because I needed to, for purely personal reasons beyond the fact that it was generally bombastic, over-long, tone-deaf and dealt with very serious issues poorly. Due to these experiences, you won’t catch me in a hot minute writing either best-friends-pining or heavy jealousy/possessiveness fic, but everyone else? Go crazy just tag your shit.
so. anyway. isn’t subjectivity actually terrifying? You never know what something can mean to someone else. So just ask, maybe.
Damn, son. Some fics you just can’t repost.
#just another mission#jam#demyrie writes#personal#abuse#stalking#emotional manipulation#i would say p/edophilia but this site doesnt know what that means and this isnt it either so how about abuse of a minor#recovery#mental health#suicidal ideation#triggers#Anonymous
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Chapter 73 - Reaction & Analysis
(Spoiler for Seraph of the End / Owari no Seraph, chapter 73, that isn’t translated to English yet. Do not click the “read more” below if you want to avoid spoiler)
We haven’t had any great chapter for many months, and it’s finally here. Frankly this chapter is one of the best OnS chapter for the whole year. And that’s not an understatement. The action sequence is glorious. It’s like what you’ll see in the end of the season in the anime.
So you all fellas better go grab the seat belt...
Because this going to be one hell of a ride
You know a chapter going to be hype when Asuramaru is on the cover, and he didn’t looks very happy there
Another Asuramaru focused chapter? Sign me tf up
We start with Yuu being a happy little dork as always and-
DID MIKA BLUSHED
THAT’S ADORABLE
I maybe get annoyed by Mika sometimes (actually, a lot) but I love it when Mika shows his positive, humanly side like this
That being said, I still hate his obsession over Yuu
Yuu, Mika, Guren, Shinya and Kureto talk about something idk not like I could have understand the discussion, so let’s skip that lmao
Apparently, Yuu is strong enough to control his “seraph mode” at will, and the wings alone could tear apart the bound that restrict him
(Though considering that Seraph!Yuu can pretty much destroy the whole city easily, that’s not a big surprise)
FIVE MINUTES AND CHILLING
THEN WE’RE ALREADY ON THE HYPE TRAIN
LOOK AT THAT
SHIKAMA DOJI IS FREAKING BEHIND YUU
I got a bad feeling about this
I got a bad feeling about this
FUCKING HELL REEEEEE
These, guys, these....
These.... are what I called as.... “the hype page”
It’s when Kagami gives a freaking goosebump over what’s gonna be happen on this freaking chapter
....And ironically, it’s VERY similar to the scene where Asuramaru confront Yuu at the manga chapter where he fought against Mirai
(This one, here, below)
Coincidence?
I really don’t think so
I can’t believe this
We’re living in a timeline where Shikama Doji, who’s pretty much the most powerful character on the series so far, and the “big bad villain” who control everything, who’s behind the whole fucking plot of the whole story, as the grand mastermind and the very first progenitor of all vampire....
....is confronting Ashera....
Who is, what we can consider, his favorite child
....Words cannot describe how hyped I am....
AND LOOK AT ASURAMARU THERE
MY BOY, THAT’S A BATTLE STANCE
HE’S GONNA WRECK HIS ASS
*announcer voice*
DEATH BATTLE! ONE MINUTE MELEE!
ASURAMARU VERSUS SHIKAMA DOJI!
Also anyone realized how he pull the sword outta his own body?
Well, apparently, that’s one of many thing that he could do
We finally see Asuramaru showing his true combat capability
Can we appreciate how badass he is there?
Hand down the most badass demon
Whoa whoa wait a minute
Shikama Doji throw his scythe, Asuramaru dodged...
AND HE CAN MAKE ANOTHER SCYTHE?
TWO OF THEM?
INSTANTLY!?
This guy is OP as heck, nerf pls
Oh my god
Let’s get a better look at that
THICC SHOTA TRAP DEMON THIGH
(lol jk that’s not what I wanna discuss here)
Apparently, Asuramaru is fast enough to react against TWO attacks at once, from two different direction
....Even Krul Tepes couldn’t do that, as shown that when Ferid and Crowley attack her at the same time, she’s distracted
Not to mention how Asuramaru attacked FOUR times in a second, against freaking death scythe of doom flying at ballistic speed
My boy is strong af
OHHHH MY GOOOOD
HE HIT HIM!
Also that special ability whoa
I can’t wait until Yuu can master that ability
So apparently, Asuramaru got more than one “special move” other than Asura Kannon to use.
Remember, Shinoa and Mitsuba said that “possession type” demon cannot use “special ability” and thus, the fact that Asuramaru (and Kiseki-o) can use special abilities, are exceptionally rare, nearly impossible.
Now we got to see that Asuramaru can do ANOTHER ability
AND WHAT CANONICALLY HURT SHIKAMA DOJI
...This is Shikama Doji that we talked about....
If you didn’t remember, Shikama Doji is someone who’s freaking goddamn powerful, not even Kureto with help of Raimeki AND Mirai’s Abaddon could even land a single scratch
And Asuramaru manage to hurt him
Reminder that Asuramaru is strong as hell
Oh no
Shi, please be nice
F U C K
Goddammit nooooo
My precious shota trap demon.. ;A;
Apparently, being bitten by Shikama Doi makes Asuramaru remember his past, which makes sense because he used to be his master
(Either that, or it’s just an illustration)
But what is that.... box.... thing?
Is that some kind of prison?
Apparently, Shikama Doji try to cut off his communication with Yuu, because we immediately switch to the scene where Yuu appeared
Annnnnd there you go
Some more Yuunoa moment for those who shipped them
So uhh... I couldn’t understand the dialogue (of course) but it seems that Yuu is in dire condition since he shouted at Shinoa before, probably asking about what the heck is happening
And Yuu seemingly tried to try to contact Asuramaru, but he couldn’t, which makes him went panic as he realized that something terribly wrong is happening right now
HOLY FUCK
GET THE FREAKING HYPE CANNON READY GUYS
YUU IS CONFRONTING SHIKAMA DOJI!!! o_O
AGHHHHHH
GODDAMMIT
Asuramaru is suffering and Shikama Doji give us the “come get me” face
Oh my god
My heart cannot take this
Look at them
I just.... cannot....
;w;
But ironically, VERY IRONICALLY, this is 90% similar to my headcanon on where Shikama Doji will visit Yuu and Asuramaru at certain chapter in the future. And at that time, Shikama Doji will awaken the forgotten memory of Ashera. Then, Yuu will try to save Ashera... in a pretty much NEARLY IDENTICAL visualization that depicted here on the canon
So apparently, Kagami and I think similarly
THEY’RE BAAAAACK TOGETHER
Oh god this makes me so happy
I mean, Asuramaru and Yuu working together to fight against Shikama Doji is pretty much the BIGGEST EVER PLOT DEVELOPTMENT IN THE WHOLE FUCKING STORY SO FAR
Like, hell.... this is a big jump on the plot
It’s like they’re gonna face the final boss
(Also wait.....)
We got a canon height comparison of Yuu and Asuramaru, at last!
My precious smol demon is so smol hahaha
But in all seriousness, let me appreciate this panel. Look at how they stand together, side by side,
Yuu, with Asuramaru... someone who used to be just a normal rookie in the army with his sword, is going far enough to get here.
The two are indeed friend, perhaps almost like a family, but I never imagine for them to stand by side like a comrade in battle, fighting against the big bad villain together like this
Honestly.... it’s an amazing development
God bless this chapter
According to a rough translation that I seen somewhere before, Shikama Doji said that seeing Yuu and Ashera being together makes him felt nostalgic.
Will we able to finally see the truth behind Yuu and Asuramaru? Will the next chapter going to be the chapter that finally reveal their backstory when they’re still together thousands years ago?
BOOOOY THE HYPEEEE
So yeah, this chapter is amazing and it’s been a long year since we can finally some freaking big plot development (not just character development) with the great plus side of a really epic badass battle scene
Great chapter 10/10
#spoiler#manga#anime#chapter 73#ons#owari no seraph#seraph of the end#owasera#owari no serafu#sote#seraph of the gay#owari no gay#owari no homo#analysis#reaction#shikama doji#asuramaru#ashuramaru#asura tepes#ashera tepes#asura#ashera#yuu#yu#yuu-chan#yuuichirou hyakuya#yūichirō hyakuya#hyakuya yuuichirou#hyakuya yuichiro#hyakuya mikaela
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May I please request college boyfriend!yuta in bullet point form? Please please please ❤️❤️❤️ I’ve been waiting so long for your requests to be reopened, I love your work!
a/n: thank you for being patient!! i hope you like this~
name: nakamoto yuta
age: immortal
major: bullshit undecided
if anyone were to try and define yuta,,, there would be a series of words that would be used,,, all of which may or may not be appropriate for ages 13 and under
yuta came to seoul from japan when he was just graduating high school on a scholarship for soccer
there were tons of schools that he really would have liked to go to all over the world, from places like New York to places in Brazil and Germany
and these schools all around the world really wanted him
he was, after all, a star on the rise
so you can see why his family was so confused when he chose to take a scholarship a little nearer to home, right in south korea
at the time, all he’d said was that seoul was somewhere he always wanted to live
which of course his family called bs on lol
yuta; what do you mean i’ve never talked about going to seoul before!! it’s my favorite place in the world!! great city!!! 10/10 would live there
literally everyone who knows this fool: you spelled seoul as seol once and it took you eight minutes to realize it
jk jk but look ok,,, he’s nowhere near as ditzy as he likes to joke about sometimes
cause yeah he’s great at soccer but he’s also got the brains to go with the brawn!! which makes him understand that despite the scholarships he’s getting to these overseas schools, not a lot of them cover all the expenses it will take to both get there and stay there
whereas the school in seoul is only 516 miles away from home, a stark difference to all those schools all over the world
if yuta wanted, he could go visit his family every weekend with the money he saved
and while seoul (shocker!) really wasn’t his dream place to be, it ended up being not too bad in yuta’s mind
to be honest,,, he kinda liked it
it was the actual school part he didn’t like
yuta felt most alive and happy when on the field, so having to take all these classes he neither cared for nor could understand on top of being in a foreign country and trying to master the language was t o u g h
while yuta never liked to admit it, there were often times he would find himself crying himself to sleep because he missed his family and old friends so much and being in another place, even if only 500 miles away, was stressful for him
thankfully, despite being one of the v few japanese students at his school, he wasn’t the only foreigner, and he’d met tons of good friends who were always patient with him when he mixed up his korean
ppl like taeyong, ten, jaehyun, doyoung, taeil, sicheng, mark, and johnny became some of his closest friends, but sicheng was his first
yuta could still remember his first day in classes at the school and how he couldn’t spot one (1) foreigner until his last class, statistics
yuta had just finished introducing himself to the class and he wasn’t really paying attention to everyone else as the teacher went down each table to get names, majors, places they were from, etc.
but then he remembered hearing this soft voice come from way across the classroom and this boy who was just a little younger than himself was introducing himself as dong sicheng and telling everyone that he was from china and would do his best to try and communicate and,,, fuk,,, it was like yuta’s world got a lil brighter
(i swear to god this is a yuta x reader fic and not a badly disguised yuwin fic ok)
almost immediately after class yuta tracks down sicheng and he’s like oh!!! hello!!! and tries to use his best korean for yuta but then yuta just pats sicheng’s shoulder with the most loving look in his eyes and probably tells sicheng he had been looking for him his whole life or something tbh sicheng doesn’t remember much of that moment except now yuta was his Best Friend and that was nonnegotiable
sicheng soon learned that yuta was also a foreigner and had gotten excited for all of five seconds before he found out he couldn’t speak much chinese, but sicheng was still pretty happy to have someone around who was in the same boat as him regardless
and, over time, sicheng began to teach him chinese and in return, yuta would teach him japanese
they would often try to navigate the horrors of being multilingual
and while yeah, it was pretty frustrating not being able to verbalize how you feel as accurately as you’d like, there were some perks
like insults. just hella insults
especially from sicheng to yuta
yuta absolutely loves pinching his cheeks and telling him how cute he is and follows the kid around and is so CLINGy and sicheng sometimes just has to smile and take it but other times,,,
sicheng: *in chinese* i’m going to skin you alive if you poke my cheek one more time you infuriating little man-
yuta: what are you saying, sicheng? *bats eyelashes lovingly*
sicheng: oh i was just saying ur my best friend in chinese hahahaha
yuta: awwww 💕❣️💓❤️💖💗💝💘
despite this though, the two really do love each other and often times do talk smack to each other about korean customs that they just Do Not Get
and all of their korean friends are just kind of like ???? why are u all so negative and yuwin is like “these are just the facts dudes”
it’s the relationships yuta has formed with these boys and more that really come in handy when yuta realizes in the middle of his second year that,,, he doesn’t really want to go to school for soccer anymore
he doesn’t love the sport any less!! but he just doesn’t feel like it’s what he wants to do for the rest of his life
there’s so much dedication and work that goes into it and yuta just isn’t in the same mindset he was in osaka or during his first year
he feels so ashamed when he informs both the school and his family that he was changing his major, and despite how his family still wants to support him in whatever he chooses, it becomes apparent that time is really running out for him at this point. most people say that declaring a major before your third year is crucial, and he has barely months left
of course, after changing his major, yuta also loses his scholarship and is therefore having to try and make ends meet in any way he can
if that’s taking odd jobs here and there and moving from the dorms into a small, cheap apartment a half hour’s subway ride away from the school, he does what he has to
it’s only randomly when he’s just wasting time with the boys at their dorm that one of them turns on this,,, anime
no it’s not hentai
and sometimes the boys joke abt yuta’s anime knowledge being sub par at best but yuta is just like “at least i’m not a weeb”
until they introduce him to this one anime
ouran high school host club
he learns that the basic premise is the protagonist ends up getting forced into working for a “host club” of pretty, rich boys who tend to the girls of their high school and raise money doing silly things like taking photos of the boys and selling them or auctioning off the host’s belongings
and while he thinks it’s pretty ridiculous,, he’s also inspired
and out of the blue after binge-watching all the episodes in two days, yuta asks if any of the boys thinks it would be possible to have a host club in this decade, specifically at their school
at first, most of them just joke about how weird it’d be and that there were hardly any rich students on campus, let alone ones pretty enough to successfully be a part of a host club
but then yuta is like “no,,, i mean we don’t have to be as elaborate as the anime but we could still do things right? like for people who are stressed with exams or who need to talk to someone because they’re homesick and their friends here don’t get it,,,,, and we can get donations and stuff to keep it going. and the more money we get the more fun activities we can organize for students to enjoy,, wouldn’t it be cool?”
so from there, a conversation spurs on and suddenly this thing is actually getting put to work
each boy is in charge of something, whether it’s being a shoulder to cry on and get advice from on (taeyong), a fun, laid back guy who knows where all the cool things to do on campus are (johnny), or a guy who is just a plain pick up line machine (yuta)
they all do something unique and different compared to the other boys and it all just,,, like it just works so well
at first the school thinks it’s fuckin weird and there’s so much they have to smooth out but they eventually end up getting a faculty advisor to look over their activities and soon enough their “host club” is in business
at first, people really don’t know what they’re getting into when they’re invited to the club on campus, only that it’s supposed to be either really funny or really embarrassing
and the boys are just as nervous as the first few students who arrive
but, at some point, something just clicks
there’s this one student who comes to taeyong every week and complains about their annoying roommate and their terrible history professor but by the end of the meeting, they feel so much lighter
there’s another student who honestly just comes to see doyoung bc he reminds them sm of like a goofy best friend who is both awkward and cute at all times and they often just go to the cafeteria and play board games for hours
and there’s another student who is a chinese transfer and finds so much comfort in getting to talk to sicheng in their native language about home bc they haven’t met many ppl on campus who are in the same boat as them and it’s just,,, a blessing
yuta’s crazy, out of the blue idea actually works
and as ppl become regulars, they tell their friends and their friends tell their friends and suddenly they’re really doing something
students who can are sparing a few bucks here and there and when the club pairs up with other clubs on campus, they also get money from the fundraisers they hold selling ice cream or organizing therapy pet meetings during exam week for all the stressed students
a portion of the money that the club gets goes to the members to help with books and other little necessities that they might have trouble paying for currently
now, yuta, like some of the other boys, doesn’t really have a niche in the club
some of them do!! and that’s fine!! but it’s a little disheartening because there’s always that student who is like “is there anyone here who can do [x] for me?” and there will be one of them there and that thing is right up their alley
whereas all the more broad and unexplored requests go to the other boys who haven’t quite established what they can do for their clients
yuta is usually good at cracking jokes and being an overall mood lifter, but,, so is johnny,,,, so is their youngest, donghyuck,,, so is their newest member yukhei
and once again, yuta just feels like he doesn’t know what he wants in life and doesn’t know where he fits in
and yeah, sure, he put together this whole club in the first place, but he leaves management in the hands of taeyong and doyoung and taeil…. the “responsible” ones
yuta was just the “goof”, the “sassy” one, the “greasy” one
he just doesn’t know where he fits….. he feels like a puzzle piece that’s missing its place from the big picture
enter you, someone who was definitely in a similar head space
you weren’t sure what you were doing with your life, if you really wanted to pursue higher education, and your mental health was suffering big time
you were pretty much on your last leg as you tried to figure out whether you should just call it quits this semester and drop out for good or if you should keep soldiering on
your friend notices that you’ve fallen so deep into a bad mood that you haven’t been able to drag yourself out of it yet, so she recommends that you come try this new thing on campus that a lot of students have been talking about
something about a “harem of handsome boys” and “the answer to all your problems”
you seriously couldn’t see how a boy would ever be the answer to any problem but nevertheless u went
after your last class of the day, your friend brought you to one of the empty rooms on the top floor of one of the buildings on campus overlooking the rest of the school
there,,, you hadn’t known what you expected but it definitely wasn’t this
there’s just a bunch of handsome looking boys sitting around the big classroom, one sitting on top of a desk and talking animatedly to one girl about god knows what, another in the back showing a girl some new trendy dance you hadn’t caught on to yet, and another standing off to the side with a kind smile on his face as he introduces himself as jungwoo, a member of the club
he asks you what you’re looking for for the evening, and you have a weird feeling about the way he asks the question but this seems so,,, innocent,,, odd but innocent
your friend nudges you to go on, and you kind of just shrug and tell him you don’t know yet
jungwoo just smiles and tells you that he knows the perfect person for you
and then he runs off to the back of the room, up to one boy who wasn’t talking to anyone yet
he’s got headphones on and the shade on the window next to him is rolled all the way up, letting the sunlight in and it highlights his sharp features and stunning hazel eyes
jungwoo says something, and then those hazel eyes are on you
you barely register your friend leaving, just that her fleeting words are “have fun with him, he’s a mystery”
hazel eyes blinks and then quietly waves you over, and out of instinct you look over to the familiar face of jungwoo to see if it’s ok
the boy who looks much younger in comparison to hazel eyes just nods and smiles that big smile again, waving you over as well
so you make your way over, catching eyes with a few of the boys who were with other “clients” as your friend had called them, some of them giving you a smile and some of them widening their eyes as they watched you make your way over to hazel eyes
jungwoo pulls a chair out for you and faces you toward hazel eyes, telling you to have fun and to talk to him if you had any questions
once he’s gone…. you don’t quite know what to do now
and hazel eyes has no problem staring at you while you try to figure it out
immediately, you decide that’s the first order of business
“so uh,,, i’m (y/n), what is ur name?” you ask, sounding much meeker than you intended
honestly, you were just tired and couldn’t quite believe this was what you were spending your very limited time doing instead of homework or staring at the wall in the middle of an existential crisis
hazel eyes smiles some, “nakamoto yuta, but you can call me later”
it takes you a second to process that he’s just used a pick up line on you,, and a bad one at that
by the time you even get a stunned laugh out of your mouth, he grins wider and you swear that the sun’s light burns a little brighter on his skin when he does, “i’m already taking your breath away, huh?”
“out of disbelief” “i know, right? i’m a marvel. it’s ok, you can admit it” he nods at you understandingly, as if he knew your feelings better than you did yourself
“is this your thing then? you’re the flirty one?” you ask, folding your arms on the desk separating the two of you and tilting your head to the side
the sun reaches you when you do and,, you looked beautiful from across the room but up close
you took his breath away
he has to collect what is left of his bearings, watching you in quiet awe as he thinks of what to say to you in response
there are no more pick up lines or witty remarks up his sleeve all of a sudden
how did you do that?
he finally clears his throat and looks away almost bashfully, “that’s more yukhei’s area”
“then what do you do?”
“uh,,, i don’t. uh. i don’t have a thing”
you hum lowly, “so do you usually get the clients who are indecisive?”
he thinks for a moment before nodding an affirmative
after a small awkward silence, he tries to fill the time you have together, “well, why don’t you tell me about why you decided to come today then? or how you’re feeling? i can find out what to do for you from there”
you try to think about what to tell him, unsure if you should go as deep as to tell the truth but also if you should stay elusive. after all, you had no idea what this club specialized in. maybe it was just for lighthearted interactions between students and nothing more
“i really only came because my friend said i should take my mind off of school stress and well, here i am”
yuta blinks for a few seconds before perking up, pushing himself up from his chair. the sudden movement surprises you, but then he’s walking over to the other corner of the room where there’s a locker located. he pops open the door and pulls out a soccer ball, then turns to you with a grin “wanna play me? loser buys slurpees at the corner store”
your eyes widen in surprise before you decide that you’ve nothing to lose and decide to accept with an added “slurpees and snacks, accordingly”
yuta ends up leading you out to the empty, open soccer field as the sun starts its descent out of the sky, kicking the ball around to you with more force and precision than you had expected
it’s only a quarter into the game when you realize that you are v seriously outplayed and yuta hasn’t broken a sweat
meanwhile you have drowned in your own bodily liquids and are probably watering the grass with it at this point
“you tricked me!” you accuse, breathing hard as you fall to your knees at another goal scored by him, but he just grins and his smile looks more devious out here than it did when you’d first seen it
“i never told you i was bad at soccer, i just told you to play me” “tricked!” “you didn’t ask!”
you rush over to retrieve the ball, wanting so badly to score a goal out of spite but when you kick,,, he just quickly blocks it and gets it into ur goal instead
finally, he decides to pity you and ends the game early with a whopping win 12-1
to make up for completely annihilating you, he offers to drive you both to the store instead of making you walk in your exhausted state and soon, the both of you are perched in chairs outside of the corner store, laughing over your slurpees and snacks and talking about everything that comes to mind, from the strange little trinkets yuta keeps in his car to your ankle socks decorated with little strawberries
the sun has fully gone down now, the night air cool but relieving on your heated skin
yuta brushes his hair back with his hand and takes a long drag from his straw before leaning back into his seat and looking at you, “so, how do you feel?”
you start at the sudden question, realizing that you have no ready-made answer on your tongue
honestly, you hadn’t thought anything about how you felt
the whole time you were with yuta, you just let go. you stopped thinking. stopped feeling. you just had fun
so you tell him just that
“i feel the most carefree right now than i ever have since i started school here”
a look of stupefaction floods his expression, making you shuffle in your seat “sorry, uh,,, was that too much?”
he quickly shakes his head, “no i just,,, uh… i feel the same”
you two just stare at each other like you’d done earlier when you’d first met, bewilderment and curiosity clear in the air
there’s something there, you both note, but what it is is still unclear
all you know is that you felt free, and all yuta knows is that he feels like he might have actually found his thing
he ends up taking you back to the school where it has gotten quite late and all the other boys have finished up with their clients and have gone home by now
yuta is going to wish you a goodnight and get back to his apartment when you turn to him and dig into your wallet all of a sudden, pulling out a few dollar bills
“i uh,, i guess you guys take donations and everything?”
usually, this wouldn’t feel so strange. after all, it’s what the club runs on next to fundraisers and the like
but
between the both of you, it just doesn’t feel right
so he pushes your hand away and grins, “you already treated me to food, silly!”
you look like you want to protest but yuta just smiles and heaves a big breath, “so! i hope i made your night”
you just look at him for a bit before blurting out “can i see you again?”
yuta is taken aback bc… well, he’s never had anyone request that of him before. he never really saw regulars like the other boys, so to imagine that he would have one just boggled his mind for a while
he soon recovered however, putting on one of his carefree smiles, “only if you’ll continue to suck at soccer”
you scowl before breaking out into laughter together, you waving a quick goodbye before slipping out of the car and heading off to your dorm room before the night got any older
and yuta really shouldn’t be surprised when he sees you in their room again the same day next week, hair put up out of your face with a funny looking headband and your body outfitted in a pair of shorts and a tee shirt and some sneakers that definitely aren’t made for running around on grass for hours
he doesn’t even get to ask you what the hell you thought you were wearing before you’re slapping your hands together and demanding a rematch for last week
and when he beats you (again), you treat him to slurpees once more
he expects you to really give up this time because now you’ve learned that he was recently attending school on a soccer scholarship and there was virtually no way that you, without any experience in the sport, could pummel him in it only after two matches
but then when he drops you off at the dorms a little earlier this time, your parting message is that you’ll be back for the next match
you meet him six days earlier, then five days, then four, three, two…
soon, you’re popping by every time you have a free hour or two to see if he’s in to play
slowly, you learn his schedule and he learns yours
the boys become well acquainted with you when you bound into the classroom with bright eyes and slightly more sport-appropriate outfits, simply yelling a “yuta, they’re here!” at the top of their lungs
while yuta starts to complain that all your meetings are the same, he does find that he’s having quite a lot of fun playing you
because, and don’t tell him i told you, but you’re getting better the more you play and he’s kinda proud
for those few hours every other day or so, it’s just the two of you messing around and playing soccer with each other
sometimes, you’ll get some talking in when you eat or when you both take a break and fall out on the grass in sweaty, panting messes
you learn all about how he wasn’t from around here, not too much of a surprise to you given his name, but you were awfully impressed with how he spoke almost like a native korean
he tells you about his life back home, about his family and how he’d gotten into soccer from a young age and adored it more than anything
he tells you how he has dreams of his mother’s homemade food and how he and his father message each other everyday about how much they miss each other
he tells you how ever since he changed his mind about his major, he’s felt lost and confused about his place in life and whether he would be anywhere near productive in the next ten years
and for the first time since yuta’s told someone about it, he feels like someone understands him
because you tell him that you feel similarly, that you don’t even know if what you’re studying for now will have any impact on your life in the future. you don’t have a clue what you want to do with your life and you don’t have a clue who you want to be,, but there’s something in that solidarity
and despite how scared the both of you are of your futures, you both decide that no matter what it is, you two can figure it out together
it’s different. it’s…. good. he likes the feeling of having someone understand him. he loves the feeling of having someone understand him and vow to walk the treacherous roads of life together. he really, really does
he also tells you about his funny habits like experimenting with making new foods (that he forces the other boys to eat and then enjoy) and teaching his unsuspecting friends out of context japanese just for kicks
you tell him if he ever teaches you something messed up in japanese you’ll kick him right in his soccer balls
he makes sure not to play u like that
except,,, maybe once
you: hey yuta how do you say “how much is this?” in japanese? i want to know if i ever visit
yuta: ohhh yeah it’s *in japanese* yuta is the best
you:…. did i just hear your name in that sentence
your friend pokes fun at you for going back so often but you honestly don’t care; you like being around yuta
in fact,, you kinda feel weird when you’re not with him
at first you had attributed it to him just having such a way with words that you would end up consumed in trying to decipher him rather than thinking about your day-to-day problems
but even when school stress was low, if he wasn’t around, you didn’t feel quite as peppy
yuta was slowly becoming something like your other half, fitting the pieces of you that you had long thought were missing
you guessed it might not have been the safest idea to start feeling so strongly for someone whose job was basically making people happy, but you felt that whatever you felt with him,, he felt with you
you could see it in the way he looked at you compared to his other clients, the way he would pretend not to light up when you’d walk in the room, or how he would try to prolong your time together in hopes that you’d stay longer,,,, keep your eyes on him more
you just didn’t know what to do with that information, didn’t know how to go about it the right way
after all, he had become someone you didn’t want to lose. if you screwed it up, you would be right back in the slump you were in before
you try instead to push the tumultuous feelings away for the time being and instead focus on meeting him again for your next match
you had managed to win your last two games and yuta was starting to get nervous, wondering if he was either losing his touch or you were just getting too good for him
when you show up to greet him that day, you notice you’re a little early and he’s with a client that had recently started coming to see him lately
she always came before you and always seemed to be somewhat starstruck whenever she would talk to him. you had eavesdropped on their conversations a number of times, so much so that you had enough blackmail fodder for d a y s
you had once teased him asking him why he never talked in such a cute voice to you as he did her
yuta: i don’t act cute for demons
usually, you would just sit off to the side and wait but you’re surprised when you’re suddenly approached by johnny who is grinning and plopping into a seat next to you, greeting you with one of his million dollar smiles “hey (y/n), waiting on yuta?”
you laugh, glancing over in the boy in question’s direction to see him fluttering his lashes at the girl “yeah, waiting on him and his girlfriend”
johnny snickers, “jealous, much?”
you fake a pout and rest your chin on your fist, “oh, definitely. i’m just overcome with the green-eyed monster!”
johnny looks over at yuta again and his friendly smile morphs into something a little sinister as he turns back to you, leaning in closer, “how obnoxious do you think we’ll have to be to get his attention?”
you take in a breath, wondering if you really should indulge johnny just for a joke, but then yuta looks over
and you start to laugh far too loudly as if johnny had just told you the most hilarious joke
you slap his shoulder for emphasis and feel yuta staring at the both of you, a slight pout on his lips as he can’t help but wonder what tf u two are even laughing abt
what’s,,, what’s with that loud laugh huh?? johnny’s not that funny??? you only laugh like that when he tells you jokes!!!!
>:(
you two keep it up well until you hear yuta call your name from the other side of the room and you finally realize the girl is long gone and yuta’s got his jacket thrown over his shoulder (all cool like, bc bad boys don’t wear their jackets apparently) and the soccer ball tucked between his hip and forearm, looking as serious as he ever has (but it’s rlly cute ishfiash)
“are you coming or are you two busy?”
johnny turns to you and tries to muffle a laugh, whispering for you to run along and that his “job is done”
whatever…. that means
you follow after yuta but he’s walking faster than usual, barely giving you a chance to keep up except for when he stops at the elevator
you try to jokingly ask him what he and his client talked about but he just mumbles “it’s confidential”
you can tell there’s something different in the air now and you’re feeling nervous, but you follow him out to the soccer field regardless and the game starts
it starts off fine, but you quickly realize that he’s playing in a totally different state than usual
he takes each shot seriously, seemingly getting you back for defeating him in the last two games
at one point, you guys get close to each other, you attempting to take the ball from him in hopes that you could somehow survive this game with more than two points or else he would totally annihilate you
your chests are bumping against each other, arms stretched backwards to fight the temptation of touching the other in order to get the ball
all it is is quick feet and sneaky steals
every time you steal, he steals back
it keeps going back and forth like that for a while, and you finally look him in the face
honestly, he could have gotten his point by now and finished the game
but,, he looks distracted
the mindless movements he makes prove that
he’ll steal the ball only to let you steal it back
“yuta…” you call his name softly, taking the ball from him once more
he seems to snap out of whatever it is that has him on another train of thought, and when he sees you have the ball, he steals it back immediately, but this time he gears up to kick it into your goal
you don’t know why you do it exactly, but you have to think fast if you want to save your ass in this game
your fingers shoot out and make contact with yuta’s sides and he jolts, breaking into an involuntary fit of laughter as you begin to tickle him
he demands that you release him in between giggles, hands weakly trying to pry yours away
you laugh too and manage to get him away from the ball just long enough to score a point while he’s compromised
yuta suddenly catches your wrists and pulls you into him, finally sucking in a breath as he realizes that you’ve just stolen a point from him. his cheeks are flushed from laughing so hard (or maybe from embarrassment, but he’d never admit to it) and he’s glaring at you, but not with nearly the same intensity as he had earlier with johnny
“you cheated” he breathes, voice low and quiet
you look up into his eyes and start smiling, flexing your hands in his grip and fighting the urge to laugh when he keeps that same hold on you, “you were distracted. i had to get your head back in the game” “you tricked me” “now, why does that sound so familiar?”
he opens his mouth to protest but finds himself speechless as he glares at you,,, and then pouts “is this payback?”
you shrug, “maybe… but why were you so distracted in the first place… you okay?”
he looks you in the eye before dropping your wrists, backing away some
and,, you miss the closeness instantaneously
yuta sighs heavily, and you’ve never heard him sound more upset before
yuta folds his arms over his chest and avoids eye contact, “i,, it’s really stupid”
“it’s ok, i expect nothing less from you” you joke, moving forward and softly tapping his chin to try and get him to look at you. you frown when he flinches away “seriously, what is it?”
“don’t you feel it?”
“feel… what?”
“you know what. just now, you felt it, didn’t you? all i do is move away from you and my whole body just feels,, wrong. it doesn’t make sense to me”
you watch as he shuffles quietly in the grass, face turned down in a thoughtful and nervous frown
suddenly, without a chance to rethink it, you grab his wrists like he had done yours and pull him right up against you, only,, you severely miscalculate his weight being thrown against you in comparison to yours being thrown against him
you go falling to the ground, right before yuta’s quick thinking has him twisting the two of you mid air so that his back hits the ground instead of yours
but again!!!! you two are really good at miscalculating!!!
and without meaning to (at least, not like this)…. your lips collide
it’s rough because of the momentum and your teeth knock together the moment you both hit the ground, but the pain disappears the second yuta hisses
and kisses you again
like you had grown so accustomed to, you get thrown into a world of your own, thoughts of the little things flying right out of the window
all you can taste is yuta’s lips and all you can feel is every nerve in your body going into overdrive
honestly, you wonder why you didn’t kiss him before
god, you really wonder why you didn’t kiss him before
you pull away first, biting your lip as you catch yuta almost chasing your lips and then letting his head fall back to the ground in defeat when you’ve moved out of his reach
“…are you still tricking me? so that I don’t call a foul on that tickling move earlier?” he narrows his eyes some, chest swelling with pride when you laugh again. because you’re laughing because of him
you cup his cheek and sigh, “you saw right through me”
that feeling you have when you’re near yuta seems to just intensify when you two decide to start dating
since yuta is naturally clingy too it just,,, works so well sehfiajsd
definitely the type of boyfriend to always be touching you in some way
sometimes if he’s not touching he’s hovering, for sure
you could just be standing and he’s like. There
the boys joke that he acts like he’s surgically attached to you but when they ask about you he always tries to act aloof like oh,,, them? yeah,,,, i don’t care abt them at all,,, i could live without them,,, *phone rings with ur caller id on the screen* wait shut up the love of my life is calling
always in The mood for some ominous reason
he’s just a bit,, kiss-starved ig
speaking of kisses!!! king of kissing you till you turn blue
he can go for quite a while and he has quite the tongue and i will leave that at that my friends
he’s such a touchy guy but if you’re equally as touchy he? goes into overload?
sometimes he might literally stop kissing you just to hyper focus on you touching him and ur like dude!!! come on!!! multi-task!!!
he blames it on the fact that you just mesmerize him and you’re too flattered to scold him again
;-;
you guys ofc still have your soccer matches, and you’ve gotten quite good
yuta had honestly missed playing between classes and the club and such, so you encourage him to rejoin the soccer team just for fun and he just loves it so much. he really did miss playing like he used to
speaking of the club, yuta is still a member, but it’s pretty clear his mind is elsewhere with clients
eventually, he decides that he can’t devote his full attention to clients any more so instead he asks 2tae and doyoung if he can maybe take an executive position
and they’re like?? uh YEH u started the damn thing lol
so yuta starts helping put together fun little outings and just tries to make the club not only more fun for the clients, but also for the members
and steadily, more ppl start to join!!! and not just boys!!!
honestly there’s a personality for everyone and something that everyone can enjoy
one time you came to visit yuta during the club hours and a newcomer mistook you for a member and started shyly asking jungwoo if she could pick you
needless to say yuta was v amused
��wow (y/n), if you weren’t dating me i’d probably hire u right now” “yuta please evaporate”
but anywho, despite all of this, yuta still hasn’t figured out what he wants to major in and do with his life
but also… he’s realized that’s okay
and that not everybody has life figured out like that
and if he has to take a year off and find something to do until he gets it then he will
and if he leaves school and never pursues it again, he’d be alright with that
because honestly, his fear of not being perfect or the rising star he was expected to be back home can’t overshadow the love he’s received not only from you but also his friends and family. and while everything in this day and age tells him he has to have it all figured out by now, he has other plans
he knows whatever he chooses to do from tomorrow morning till the last day of his life, he’ll make the decision because he wants to, because he loves what he’s going to do, and because his happiness is more important than any preconceived notions of “success”
he’ll be alright, he’s more than loved enough to see the silver lining
#yuta scenarios#yuta imagines#yuta au#college boyfriend!yuta#boyfriend!yuta#nakamoto yuta#nct scenarios#nct imagines#nct au#college boyfriend!nct#boyfriend!nct#nct#majwrites#sbmusings#this came out possibly longer than intended but it ok
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goku and chichi for the character thing!!
brace yourselves i’m gonna gush about my spouses. yes i’m married to both of them why do you ask
chichi first because she’ll be less overwhelming
favorite thing about them: she’s like. The Lesbian Experience. okay not really but i’m sure she was at least someone’s gay awakening, and for good reason. like… have you seen how much ass this gal kicks? she’s fantastic! i love the dynamic she has with her father and just how cutesy she is around goku even if she deserves way better than him but i could go on about that forever. ALSO i have a couple of the classic dragon ball manga and i adore the way they translated her speech? she sounds like a country bumpkin and it’s adorable. admittedly i’ve only really watched dragon ball classic but i love her and i get really happy every time she’s around!
least favorite thing about them: chichi is a very cool character. very, very cool! but she’s heavily underutilized in the narrative of dragon ball because she’s delegated to Wifey and nothing else. she could have a role alongside the z fighters but she doesn’t because toriyama doesn’t know how to write women or relationships or anything. i also really hate how even though kid chichi’s outfit is super cute it’s also weirdly revealing for a little kid and Who thought it was a good idea to have her stop wearing the helmet? the helmet was kickass! SHE’S MORE OF A CHARACTER THAN JUST “GOKU’S WIFE” Y’ALL I DON’T KNOW HOW MUCH MORE OBVIOUS I CAN MAKE THIS!!! NOT THAT I DON’T LOVE GOCHI TO SOME DEGREE BUT JESUS CHRIST!!!! THEY BOTH WORK BETTER WITH OTHER CHARACTERS!!!!!!!!! their relationship needs some serious reworking. i guess that’s my biggest issue, coupled with the fact that it’s practically chichi’s entire character…
favorite line: ooh i’m gonna quote the manga volume i have for this one because i’m no good at remembering lines. “OO, THIS IS JES’ TOO DANG FREAKY! GIT OUTTA HERE!!!” this translation of the manga is the only valid iteration of dragon ball there is, ever.
brOTP: chichi is friends with everyone. that is canon and the truth. also since i only know classic i’m not the best judge of this… but she probably gets along with vegeta pretty well at least? they hang out. talk about how dumb goku is. you know the drill.
OTP: i love how i can’t say gochi for this because their canon interactions are… Yikes. i love the ship in theory but in execution? they’re both better off dating my self-insert and they’re all married and they love one another very much anyway um… bulchi. bulma and chichi. yeah. that’s it. that’s what i was gonna say.
nOTP: lol gochi (jk i’m sure there are worse ships out there… somewhere)
random headcanon: she’s weirdly good at understanding other people’s feelings. when people vent to her she can just listen on and on and even connect with them to some degree. she’s a supportive presence and her very existence is a positive influence on the rest of the cast!
unpopular opinion: she is more of a character than just goku’s wife and she also deserves better than him. gochi is such a circumstantial thing for me haha
song i associate with them: is the song “chi-chi” too obvious? prrrrrrobably. but until i get a better idea that’s what we’re sticking with! additionally i’d like to bring up the song waves! maybe it’s too urban for her but i love it very much so. it’s chichi now. god i love chichi so much OH SHIT I THOUGHT OF ONE MORE!!! sorry i’m looking for a song for goku and it just occurred to me that Apple Blossom suits her WONDERFULLY i’m going to cry THAT’S MY GIRL!!!!!!!!!
favorite picture of them: look at how cute she is i love her so much i will protect her with my goddamn life!!!
now it’s Boy Hour
favorite thing about them: I LOVE SON GOKU SO DAMN MUCH!!!! HE IS SO CUTE AND SUCH A FUN AND VERSATILE CHARACTER AND HIS VOICE IS PRECIOUS AND HE’S SUPER HANDSOME IN DBZ AND??? AND I LOVE AND SUPPORT HIM SO MUCH? HE HAS AN ACCENT IN THE MANGA LIKE CHICHI DOES ONLY LESS PRONOUNCED AND IT’S PRECIOUS AND HE FOLLOWS MY LITERAL FAVORITE TROPE IN THE UNIVERSE, AKA “CHARACTER FROM ANOTHER TIME/PLACE HAS TO ADJUST TO MODERN TIMES” AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaaa… okay with a little less capslock now, goku has legitimately been a positive influence on me recently. he is a Happy Boy and i wanna be happy too! i just got my goku varsity jacket in the mail last friday and i’m still swooning over how wonderful it is? i’m wearing it right now y’all. Right Now. also i have a goku plush and he’s precious have a nice day!
least favorite thing about them: okay there’s a lot to say here. a Lot a lot a lot. but my biggest issue is the fact that goku is an incredibly static character. he doesn’t change or express himself almost ever. i don’t know how much of this is Shounen Protagonist Syndrome and how much of it is toriyama’s flaws as a writer but it really stresses me out! saiyajin emotional suppression is one thing and not knowing how to feel is another, but goku’s levels of Feeling Nothing are off the fucking charts. he’s also a terrible father and family man and is totally willing to just run off somewhere and get badly hurt without telling anyone. most of this would be fine if it was actually addressed and if goku changed as a character, but he never does. how do we know if he’s happy with chichi when even love seems like a foreign concept to him?
favorite line: okay we’re getting positive again. “You can tell girls and boys apart just by looking? Awesome!” let me use a manga quote for this because i have them on me and i love the way his dialogue is written. goku’s reaction to getting shot multiple times: “Ha! Dummy! Stupid! Y’think you can hurt me?! With little owchies like that?! Hah!” (note: i had to take a break from the character meme here because i got too distracted by my incredible love for this manga)
brOTP: GOKU AND BULMA ARE BFFS!!! also goku and oolong even though oolong totally has a thing for goku and goku doesn’t notice because he’s an oblivious baby
OTP: GOKRILLIN GOKRILLIN GOKRILLIN ALSO KAKAVEGE THOSE ARE BOTH REALLY GOOD WHAT IF THEY WERE ALL DATING AT THE SAME TIME. OH SHIT. OH DAMN. goku is also married to my self-insert and chichi at the same time they all love one another a lot and
nOTP: …well, i mean. gochi i guess. i love it but at the same time it’s so… GgghghgHGghghhh sometimes. also i’m not the biggest fan of goku/bulma, whatever that ship is called.
random headcanon: goku is legitimately traumatized from the “training” he experienced with roshi. there is a reason i don’t have a tag for roshi on my blog and only call him Nasty Man. it’s because i hate him and he hurt goku and kuririn and i’ll kick his gross p*dophilic ass. ALSO GOKU IS A BOTTOM. DON’T FIGHT ME ON THIS I KNOW I’M RIGHT
unpopular opinion: he’s a bisexual icon. actually no that should be commonly accepted. Actually that’s just canon what am i doing ha ha lol
song i associate with them: honestly i can’t think of any off the top of my head so give me a moment here. ok so i’m gonna toss we’re going to be friends into the void here even though it’s not nearly as energetic as most “goku music” would be. and maybe uhh. i’ve been going through my music folder for like half an hour and i’ve found nothing else that suits him so i give the fuck up. i’m sorry goku pwease don’t hate me
favorite picture of them: S q u i s h y.
also this other one that i’m linking to directly so i can be sure it will play because i love it so much i spent like an hour on this fucking post holy christ
#txt#russell talks#character meme#son goku#chichi#dragon ball#long post#text heavy#caps#untagged otherwise#mintgelato#ask#russell selfships
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