#jemily i believe in you

[xohoneybun]

I JUST WOKE UP TO THIS??!!!?!!

EXCUSE ME MRS BREWSTER!?!?!!?

WHAT DO YOU MEAN???

DID WE WIN??!!???!?

[lesbianladysif]

Make Me Choose: @ladyylesbian asked Emily Prentiss or Jennifer Jareau

[twosignificantfigures]

i actually have to admit something...

when i first watched criminal minds, i was a hotchniss shipper (to be honest, i shipped all of them with one another except with rossi) and i joked with my friends that it was because i was still closeted at the time and therefore couldn't admit being a jemily shipper

but i rewatched it again... and i fear i still am a hotchniss girl through and through those are PARENTS

[garciaasfluffypen]

take care of me (like i take care of you) pt. 3

pairing: jemily x reader word count: 2.4k warnings: SURPRISE i finished part three and wanted to post it so i could get this cross posted to ao3 hehe. its time to talk(tm) about everything that happened! y/n's rejection sensitive dysphoria episode is a prominent aspect of this part. poor emily doesn't really know what to do except comfort her girlfriends, jj has some issues she's working through, y/n feels absolutely horrible about everything that conspired

after everything that had happened in the past two hours, you were drained. you barely made it to the bedroom before bursting out into tears. this was it. this was the big kablooey. jj hated you now, there was no doubt about it. considering the way she reacted when you had let the term slip past your lips… you never should have done it. you pushed too hard, and this was the end. you’d have to change your name and move to timbuktu so nobody could find you ever again and you’d never be able to embarrass yourself in front of jj and emily anymore. the harsh what did you just call me? reverberated through your mind as you let the sobs take over your body, practically doubling over with the sheer force of guilt. you couldn’t believe yourself. how could you let it get that bad? it hadn’t even been three months and you already fucked up. but that was just it, wasn’t it? the three month curse you were stuck with. nothing romantic ever lasted past three months. it was only time that this one ended, giving you a chance to reset and find something new. your exes were right, you were never good enough. you always did something wrong. it was bound to happen sooner rather than later, and you needed to expect the worst. 

peeling off the clothes you had worn to the zoo, you blindly felt in what had been dubbed your drawer for your jammies. you had gotten the shirt from an online store and it was the perfect shirt for when you were having bad days or sensory overloads. and a bonus, it was long enough to cover your butt and go halfway down your thighs. you had gotten it big on purpose, and you were glad you did. once you felt the fabric, you pulled it on and stumbled back to the bed, grabbing a pillow and holding it close to your chest as you continued to try and calm yourself down. logically, you knew you were over reacting, but the fact you were tired mixed with the immense guilt you felt for making jj feel bad… everything piled up and you found yourself trying not to spiral more than you already had. 

the door opened and a figure stood there for a second before coming over and pulling you into the biggest hug they could muster. after a second, the scent of emily flew through your senses and slowly but surely you started to calm down as you curled into her arms. 

“oh, lovey…” 

this was one of the downsides to how bad your adhd and rejection sensitive dysphoria was- when you cried, you cried hard. you had gotten good at bottling up your feelings into a little corner of your mind that barely got touched unless you had a whole weekend carved out to mope around. those weekends were far and few between these days, seeing as the budget increase the bau got gave them more opportunities to take cases. it wasn’t too bad, until this happened and you cried so hard you felt like you might throw up. 

you curled into emily’s chest, barely registering the door opening. a red eyed jj stood in the doorframe, hands wringing together as she looked for you. jj looked worse for wear, emily noted. the last time she had seen jj like this was when they were at the fertility doctor earlier in the year, when they talked about the possibility of emily carrying a viable pregnancy. but that wasn’t anything they could talk about right now. the puffiness around her eyes was evident, tear marks showing where she had piled on concealer earlier that morning. she sniffled, gaining your attention. your head perked up and you felt your heart drop when you saw how upset jj was. wordlessly, you shifted on the bed to make room for jj, letting her crawl in, curling herself up between the gap you had created. she wrapped her arms around you, squeezing you tight as she could as a single tear fell down her face. you wiped it away with the pad of your thumb, shooting her a small smile. 

“i’m sorry i reacted that way, baby.” 

her words were muffled into the palm of your hand, her breath dancing across your skin as you put your cheek on top of your head. your logical thinking skills slowly started to poke through the barriers your rejection sensitive dysphoria always put up during these moments, the realization that it also upset jj hitting you like a ton of bricks. you hated seeing her so upset, especially when you knew you caused some of the upset. granted, everything was still so new and you all were getting used to the idea of the three of you being together, but it still hurt you more than you could ever put into words. 

“no, it’s my fault.” you started. “i pushed you too hard. i should have asked before assuming i could just call you mommy and get away with it. do you…?” you trailed off, hoping that jj knew what you were trying to ask.  

“i’m not sure how i feel about the use of mommy.” jj said, quieter than normal. “it didn’t make me feel… i didn’t like it.” 

emily raised her eyebrow, slightly shocked that jj didn’t give you the full truth. while she knew what seemingly the true reason jj didn’t like being called mommy, she knew that it would be something she revealed to you in due time. hell, jj was still figuring it out herself. the dislike of the feminine terms was something that had started within the past year and a half. yes, jj was very feminine presenting and loved dressing up when given the opportunity, yet she had begun to start hating when she was perceived in a feminine matter. it was an interesting late life dilemma to have, and she wasn’t sure how to go about it. she had been so secure in her identity for years, and to start questioning everything? it had started to send jj into a spiral of thoughts she frankly wasn’t ready to think about yet.

the only other person who knew about her dilemma was tara. it had come out one night while the two were having wine after a long case and emily was stuck at the office filling out more paperwork than intended due to her having shot the unsub. the two of them were a bottle and a half deep into pinot gritiot, and jj had blurted out “do you ever just… not want to feel like a girl?” and now here they were, with emily being the second person to know that jj had started to despise the feminine terms of endearment she had been taught to love growing up. it scared her. but not as much as the thought of you thinking you lost her. 

“emmy?” you looked to emily. “do you like being called mommy? because for some reason it felt very natural and i don’t know why.” 

“we can toy around with it.” emily squeezed your hand. “thank you for asking.” 

“i’m sorry i was super bratty earlier, too. i let it go too far.”

“i thought it was hot, actually,” jj started to blush. “i do think we need to play around with different dynamics and what we’re okay and not okay with. nothing has to be set in stone, but if i’m being honest… it was…”

“i liked it when you got all controlling.” you finished jj’s thought. “i really did.” 

“would you want to play around with that more? me being more… in charge sometimes?” 

you nodded. “i’d like that. because i like listening to emmy but…” 

“it’s very easy for you to listen to me, i know.” emily smirked. “and it’s very endearing.”

“is that something you’re okay with?” you looked over to emily. 

“if you’re comfortable with it, then yes.” 

“color system applies to everything we try.” jj stated. “any time, you can tell us to stop and we will. or call yellow and we can talk it out. and it applies to you, too. if there’s anything that we don’t like, we’ll tell you.” 

you nodded. “is there anything else that i’ve done? have i made either of you uncomfortable?” 

emily couldn’t help but clock the nervous look in your eye, seeing the fidgeting start in her peripheral vision. it was sad for her, seeing you like this. she hated when you got sad. you felt certain emotions more than others, and when you did feel them they hit you like a ton of bricks. emily most likely would never know how that truly felt, but she could only imagine the thoughts flowing around in your mind that would make you feel less than. she couldn’t control herself, searching your eyes for any emotion other than guilt. it pained you knowing that you thought you were the reason the conversation was happening. she wanted to grab you by the shoulders and scream at you that it was not your fault and would most likely never be your fault, but she knew that would be counter productive. the three of you were all adults, you could talk about it like adults. 

jj on the other hand, felt horrible. her reaction was the reason you felt as if you were the reason the problem persisted. guilt plagued her as she stared at you, her hand coming up to gently brush back some of the strands that had fallen from your braid. she knew her own insecurities were the reason everything was going the way it was, and the main reason the three of you were sat here in various stages of emotional distress, but it was something she knew taking the blame for would just make you feel worse. she didn’t fully understand how your brain always made you think that you were the problem, but it was something you had been fighting for years. even penelope couldn’t get it through your brain that nothing was ever your fault. and that was saying something, since you and penelope had been friends for ten years leading up to when you joined the bau. both emily and jj knew it would take a while to get past the walls you had put up, but they didn’t realize how tough it would be. but it was a fight they were going to get through together, no matter what it meant. 

“nothing you’ve done could make us uncomfortable, y/n.” jj’s voice softened. “i know this is new, and it’s making you react in ways that you normally wouldn’t react, right?” 

you nodded. “i’m trying to be better, promise. i guess i just want to be taken care of?” you questioned. “but i have a hard time accepting it. like… i just want someone to take care of me like i take care of you. i’m just… i’m getting used to it.”

“is that why you were pushing today?” jj looked at you. “because you wanted to feel taken care of?” 

you sheepishly nodded. “a little bit. i liked it when you told me we were leaving and got all bossy.” 

jj smiled. “i can do that more. do you want to have a certain phrase or word to let me know when you want it?” 

“um… maybe like… a shoulder tap to start? i don’t want to say anything out loud, especially if it happens in front of the team.” 

“how about three taps left shoulder?” you nodded, a small smile forming on your face. “and if there’s anything we do when we’re out that you don’t like?” 

“i’m not sure of that one yet.” you swallowed. “i’m sorry we didn’t have this conversation earlier. we could have avoided this.” 

“lovey, having these conversations is one of the things we need to do to ensure we’re all happy. we can’t necessarily schedule them.”

“i still feel guilty." you sniffled. “i made jj feel bad.”  

“oh baby,” jj pulled you back closer to her as the guilt washed over you again. “i’m not mad at you at all. if anything, i over reacted to that. i promise you i’m not mad. i’m not mad at all.” 

“you promise?”

“i promise.” jj placed a soft kiss to the tip of your nose. “i’m sorry i made you feel like you hurt me.” 

“i’m sorry i didn’t ask you if i could call you mommy and made you upset.” you looked down at your hands, which were fidgeting with your shirt. 

jj lifted your chin up with her finger. “hey hey, none of that now. no more feeling bad.” 

you chuckled. “okay. i’ll try.” 

“how about i draw us a bath?” emily smiled at the two of you. “with the epsom salt for your sore muscles?” 

“that sounds really nice.” you smiled. “can we light the candle i like too?” 

“vanilla swirl or the one that smells like disney?” 

you pursed your lips, thinking. “the one that smells like disney.” 

“i’ll go grab it.” emily placed a kiss to the top of your head. “you feeling better?”

“a little bit.” you nodded. “i’ll be better soon.” 

“good.” she squeezed your hand. “i’ll go get everything and let you know when the bath is ready.” 

emily slipped out of the bed and went to go get your candle, leaving you and jj sitting on the bed together. she placed her forehead against yours, her hand going to cup your cheek as you sat in the silence. 

“i-”

“if you say i’m sorry i’m pushing you off this bed.” 

you chuckled lightly. “i do feel bad.”

“and i’m telling you that you don’t have to. promise. every relationship is going to have it's issues. we’re just able to talk them out because we’re adults.” 

“yeah, you’re right.” you put your head in the crook of jj’s shoulder. “thank you for not being mad.” 

jj smiled. “thank you for listening and not freaking out when i told you i didn’t like it.” 

“i mean i freaked out a little bit.” 

“but not a lot.” jj chuckled. “you’re adorable.” 

“you are too. like, a lot.” 

you snuggled into jj’s arms, curling into her side. it made you feel a lot better knowing that she wasn’t super mad at you like you thought. while you still felt guilty for making her feel bad, it made you feel better knowing that jj didn’t think of you any differently. 

and that she still deeply cared about you. 

taglist: @jayden-prentiss @idkwhatever580 @multifandomlesbianic @softestqueeen

[unsuub]

the whole ultimate jemily moment got me rewatching the show and im on season 3 episode 1

i cant believe i , a queer who struggles with comphet and self identity constantly , missed this but

JJ AND EMILY TALKING ABOUT GIRLS IN COLLEGE AND JJ SAYING : ALL I REMEMBER WAS TRYING TO FIGURE OUT WHO I WAS (not word for word)

AND EMILY SAYING : YOU MOVE ENOUGH YOU LEARN HOW TO BE WHAT EVERYONE EXPECTS YOU TO BE

I LOVE MY CLOSETED BABIES SO MUCH

[lesbiantaylorswiftstan]

no offense, but some of you jemily stans - especially the younger ones (and yes i know i'm part of that demographic) - would believe me if i said i wrote "gullible" on the ceiling. we're not getting canon romantic jemily in s18 or very likely ever. paget is not queerbaiting. aj is not queerbaiting. the cm social media team is not queerbaiting (and i would like to add that none of them have a say in how the show is written, so begging them to make jemily canon or accusing them of queerbaiting does literally nothing except make you miserable)

yes, jemily is the word used to refer to the potential romantic relationship between jj and emily, but it's also always been the word used to refer to their friendship. saying that there will be jemily moments or that jemily will be "alive" does not mean they're promising romantic jemily. after not getting any jemily interaction in s16, we should honestly be thankful that they're giving us these moments between jj and emily (that you can interpret however you want!!!)

like in my opinion, the ultimate jemily moment last season was absolutely perfect. we all (or at least most of us) knew that romantic jemily was not going to become canon, but they gave us a moment that made up for the complete lack of interaction in s16, acknowledged everything they've been through together, and could easily be interpreted as having romantic subtext if you so choose. and yet some of you were still complaining because what? you honestly thought jj and emily were going to kiss and/or confess their undying love for each other despite all the circumstances inside and outside the show that make that completely unrealistic?

the worst thing is that i know the people who want jemily so desperately to be canon would probably still complain about it if it became canon because it didn't happen in the way they want, just like they complained about the ultimate jemily moment

[beware-of-you-98]

Hello I cannot believe “it gives me you” is canon jemily dialogue and not plucked straight from ao3

[scarlettjemily]

Latch

I have a Jemily playlist on spotify and I shuffle it and write a fic inspired by the song

Song: Latch (acoustic version) - Sam Smith (suggested by @pascaleledumbo)

Pairing: Emily Prentiss/Jennifer "JJ" Jareau

Summary: Season 17 Emily and JJ finally getting married. This is their wedding day. This fic is just pure happiness, not a single thing goes wrong. It's just all love.

Word count: 2.2k

Posted on Ao3 as well

Chapter 2

*Not my pictures*

“You’d think with it being my second wedding, I wouldn’t be so nervous,” JJ laughed, smoothing out her dress with her hands. She looked at herself in the mirror, a rush of excitement hitting her.

"Yes, but your first wedding wasn’t with Emily,” Penelope pointed out, handing JJ her bouquet. “You look so beautiful,” she gushed, looking at her best friend. She had to stop herself from crying; she couldn’t believe Emily and JJ were finally getting married after all these years.

“Hey! Don’t you start! I don’t want to ruin my makeup before I get out there.” JJ turned away from Penelope, waving the girl away.

Penelope took the most dramatic deep breath, trying to compose herself, “I think I’m okay; let’s go. We can’t keep Em waiting,” she said, ushering the bride out of the room so they could get to the wedding.

“Nervous?” Tara asked, handing a glass of whiskey to Emily. She sat down on the arm of the couch, watching as Emily took a quick sip of her drink, then placing it down so she could fix the buttons of her suit.

Emily chuckled, her shoulders shrugging. “A little, but I’m more shocked. I never thought we’d be together, let alone get married.” She picked her drink back up and turned to face Tara. “How do I look?” She asked, giving her a spin.

“You’re an absolute smoke show, Emily; you look amazing.” They both laughed and clinked their glasses together, throwing back the rest of their drinks. “Okay, the car is here; we better head off.”

Penelope held JJ’s hand as they walked up to the entrance of the little garden; she could hear soft piano music playing, which was her cue that the ceremony was about to start. She saw Rossi standing at the entrance; he smiled and held his hand out for her.

JJ felt tears well up in her eyes. “Dave, really? Am I not too old to be walked down the aisle?” She joked, trying to stop herself from getting too emotional. She was already feeling overwhelmed, in the best way possible. She just wanted to see her soon-to-be wife.

He grabbed her hand and linked his arm with hers. “Oh hush, I already walked Emily down 5 minutes ago.”

JJ couldn’t help but smile at the thought of Rossi walking the woman down the aisle. Her usual stoic self, probably struggling to compose herself and to hide how much it meant to her. “How’d she seem?” JJ asked, watching as Penelope walked around the bend of the aisle.

“She was happy, Jennifer, so unbelievably happy." Dave looked at JJ with a warm smile. He lifted her chin with his finger so she was looking at him. “Are you ready?” His smile was so comforting for JJ; he really was like a father to her. To them both.

“I’m so ready,” she beamed, walking arm in arm down the aisle. When she walked around the bend, the first thing she saw were all their friends in their seats. Granted, there weren’t a lot of people, but the most important people were there. It made it more special that way.

As soon as JJ’s eyes locked onto Emily, she felt her throat tighten. She was beautiful. The most beautiful woman she’d ever laid eyes on. There was no stopping the tears that dropped from the corner of her eyes. That was her soulmate.

She was dressed in a completely ivory suit that cinched at her waist perfectly. The wide-legged pants covered a pair of pointy white heels. Her silver hair pinned up loosely, stray curls falling around her face perfectly. It took every ounce of control JJ had to not sprint down the aisle and jump on her fiancée.

Emily had to look away for a moment to collect herself; the pure shock of seeing JJ in a wedding dress stole all the air from her lungs. She looked back and let out a quiet laugh when she saw JJ crying. She knew all too well how emotional JJ could be—a change of pace from her usual lack of emotions. Well, lack of expression, Emily felt a lot; all the time, she just compartmentalised better than most.

JJ looked radiant, walking down the aisle in an ivory dress that matched Emily’s suit perfectly. More proof the women were made for each other; they complemented one another without needing to plan a single thing. Emily’s chest felt warm when she looked at JJ; her blonde hair was loosely curled and falling over her tanned shoulders. Emily could swear that JJ’s skin was glowing under the warmth of the sun; she’d never felt more in love with the woman than she did in that moment.

JJ took the last few steps down the aisle; she gave Rossi a kiss on the cheek, whispering her thanks. She handed her bouquet to Penelope before she turned to look at her fiancée. She laughed as she began to cry again. She couldn’t control the emotions that were spilling out of her; every time she looked at Emily, she just felt so overwhelmed with joy; all she could do was laugh and cry.

Emily reached her hand out, taking a hold of JJ's hand, the other resting on her hip. “My love, you look so beautiful,” she whispered, planting a kiss on her cheek. JJ’s hand rested on Emily’s cheek, shaking her head, her eyes taking in her facial features. Something she’d done a million times before "here,” Emily said, pulling a tissue out of her jacket pocket and handing it to JJ. The small crowd of people laughed at the sight, all of them knowing what JJ was like.

“Thank you,” JJ chuckled, using the tissue to dab her cheeks. “I just can’t believe we’re finally here,” she said, still not believing that they were about to get married. Emily agreed, giving JJ’s hand a firm squeeze, not planning to let go anytime soon.

“They will both now read their vows; who would like to go first?”

The two women had a silent conversation with their eyes, deciding that JJ would start. Penelope handed her a piece of paper that had her vows written on it; she unravelled them, her hands shaking slightly. The paper was covered in her neat and precise handwriting—not a single letter out of place. Emily smiled knowingly; her paper was the complete opposite: covered with scribbles, words crossed out. It represented them perfectly.

“Emily, my Emily." JJ started, glancing at her fiancee for a moment before deciding to keep her eyes on her paper; otherwise, she wouldn’t be able to get through the vows. “I can’t believe I’m standing in front of you right now, at our wedding, about to call you my wife. You started off as my co-worker, then you quickly became a friend. Then all of a sudden you were my boss,” the crowd laughed along with Emily and JJ. “Then you finally became my girlfriend, my fiancee, and now my wife." JJ let out a shaky breath, a small tear rolling down her cheek, but she was able to continue reading through it. “After everything we’ve been through together and separately, I’m so grateful to say that you have been the most consistent thing in my life. No matter what, you were there. Always.” She used her arm to wipe her tears because she refused to let go of Emily’s hand. “You were there for me when I didn’t even know that I needed you, but I think I’ve always needed you, and I’m certain I’ve always loved you. Even if it took me a while to come to terms with it,” a soft chuckle sounded from the crowd. “But now that I’ve got you, I promise you, there’s no way I’ll ever let you go.”

Emily quickly wiped a tear from her eye as JJ finished her vows. She squeezed her hand and gave her a warm smile. “That was beautiful, darling,” she complimented. She pulled her own piece of paper out of her pocket and shook her head. “Not as neat as yours,” she admitted sheepishly. JJ gave Emily an amused look, assuring her it was okay and waiting to hear her vows.

“Jennifer, Jen, JJ, my darling, my love... I can’t keep track of all the names I call you, and I’m sure there will be a million more that I’ll come up with, seeing as you’re stuck with me for the rest of our lives,” she laughed, looking up at JJ. All the people around them seemed to disappear when Emily watched JJ giggle; she stopped for a moment, getting distracted by how beautiful she was. "God, you’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen,” she stated, practically dazed.

JJ couldn’t help herself; she planted a kiss on Emily’s cheek. “Thank you, baby,” she whispered. “Keep going,” she encouraged, giddy about what might be on the paper.

Emily let out a quick breath, concentrating on her paper again. “I truly believe I fell in love with you the first day I met you, but I thought you’d never feel the same way. So I decided that I’d have you in any capacity I could, and that was as my best friend. Now that you’re going to be my wife, I promise to always be your best friend first, to always be by your side, loving you and supporting you and annoying you just as much,” she gave JJ a quick wink before continuing. “I’m so grateful you chose me to be your wife. I wake up next to you every day, and I’m still pinching myself because I can’t believe that I get to call you mine." Emily folded the paper back up and returned it to her pocket. “I promise to love you until the day I die, and then in my next life, I promise to find you and love you again and again and again,” she croaked, her cry getting stuck in her throat.

JJ shook her head, crying at Emily’s words. She grabbed Emily’s face, not caring about the traditions of the wedding, and kissed her deeply. Emily’s hands landed on JJ’s hips as she kissed her back; there was no way she would pull away. She also didn’t care about traditions; her and JJ were by no means a traditional couple.

“Well then, you both may keep kissing the bride!”

The crowd erupted with loud cheers and continuous clapping. Both women laughed into their shared kiss, pulling each other closer, not wanting the moment to end.

“After you, my wife,” Emily held JJ's hand as she stepped into the car; she didn’t let go as she slid in the back seat next to her wife. “Thank you,” she aimed at the driver as he began to drive off.

JJ scooted closer to Emily, wrapping her arms around the woman as best she could. “I love you,” she hummed, smiling contentedly when Emily wrapped one arm around her shoulders, pulling her closer. Emily mumbled the sentiment back, placing a series of small kisses on JJ’s forehead. “Did you have a good day?” She asked, pulling back slightly so she could look at her wife’s face.

Emily placed her finger under JJ’s chin, running the pad of her thumb across her bottom lip. “It was better than good, baby; it’s been the best day of my life,” she whispered. Her heart swelled seeing JJ’s face beam; she captured JJ’s lips in a kiss, still holding her chin. “I can’t wait to get you to the hotel,” she mumbled against her lips, clumsily kissing her at the same time.

JJ swore her body shivered at the thought of getting back to their hotel. She gave her wife one last squeeze before pulling away. “We’ve got to stop; otherwise, I won’t be able to control myself in the back of this car,” she stated under her breath, only for Emily to hear.

Emily smirked, holding JJ close to herself, letting her chin rest atop her wife’s head. "Soon, my love, we’ll be there soon,” she reassured, letting her hand rest on JJ's thigh.

JJ squealed when Emily lifted her in her arms in the traditional bridal carry. “Emily! Don’t drop me!” She laughed, holding her tightly around her neck.

Emily stepped through the door of their room and swiftly kicked it shut behind her. “I would never, baby girl; I’ve got you.” She headed down the hall into the room, aiming straight for the bed. She threw JJ onto it, chuckling at JJ’s overly dramatic squeals. Emily kicked her heels off and walked to the edge of the bed, simultaneously unbuttoning her suit jacket.

JJ giggled, hopping up on her knees and crawling over to Emily. “Let me,” she purred, pulling Emily’s jacket down her arms and throwing it to the floor. She frantically kissed her while making quick work of her blouse; she moaned deeply when Emily’s hands made their way into her hair. Pulling it tightly into a makeshift ponytail, “I love you,” she groaned as Emily pulled her hair back, beginning to kiss down JJ's neck.

“I love you too, my darling,” Emily declared against JJ's skin, her hand snaking around her back to unzip her dress. “I can’t believe you’re my wife,” she divulged, watching as JJ's dress pooled around her knees, leaving her in just her underwear. “You’re all mine,” she professed, wrapping her arms around JJ's bare waist.

JJ wrapped her arms around Emily’s neck, pressing their foreheads together. “I’m yours, Emily, forever,” she beamed, both women still basking in the shock that they each finally got to marry their best friend.

[queers-anatomy]

I cannot believe I finally have an otp tag for jemily after almost 18 years and it’s “it gives me you” 😭😭😭

[0o-junebug-o0]

It's A Beautiful Thing

summary: Emily struggles to come to terms with her sexuality and goes to Tara for help after a disastrous hookup

genre: hurt/comfort

cw: internalized homophobia, comp het (compulsory heterosexuality), implied/referenced sexual assault (NOTHING HAPPENS it's just assumed that it did), religious trauma, religious guilt, mentions of pregnancy, mentions of abortion, using sex as a coping mechanism, unhealthy relationships to sex, Jemily mentions, coming out, unrequited love (or at least it's believed to be)

wordcount: 1.9k

Emily sits on the corner of the bed and sighs as she pulls her pants back on. Her whole body feels wrong and she wants to leave. She looks over at the door to the ensuite bathroom and listens to the sound of the shower running. She shouldn’t leave while he’s still in the shower. That would be cruel. It’s not like he was bad or did anything she didn’t want, it just didn’t feel right. 

She picks her bra off the floor and looks around for the first time as she clasps it behind her back. The whole room is painfully male. She hates it. And she hates that she hates it. 

Emily closes her eyes and runs her fingers through her hair to detangle it as best as possible. Her chest feels tight and she leans forward, burying her face in her hands and tucking her head between her knees. The sound of the shower feels like it’s drilling into her skull and the smell of sex that surrounds her makes her feel sick.

She presses her hand over her mouth and chokes on a small sob. She needs to leave, she needs to get out of here. She lifts her head and takes a deep breath before picking up her shirt and pulling it over her head. She then grabs her purse from where she’d discarded it in the corner of the room and pulls out her phone. 

An idea strikes her and she slips her phone into her pocket before knocking on the bathroom door. “Jackson?” Emily calls out, keeping her voice steady with practiced ease despite feeling like she’s about to implode.

The water shuts off. “Yeah?” he calls back.

Emily squeezes her eyes shut for a moment before speaking. “I’m so sorry. I have to go. I just got a call from work.”

“Yeah, yeah, you should go,” Jackson says sounding surprisingly okay at the thought of her leaving. “Go kick some ass.”

Emily opens her eyes and pinches the bridge of her nose. “I will. I’ll call you,” she lies.

“Yeah! Yeah! Just lock the door on the way out, you can do it from the inside.” There’s silence for a moment before the shower turns back on. Almost immediately, Emily rushes out of the room and out of Jackson’s apartment, making sure to lock the door.

She takes the stairs instead of the elevator, unable to stand the thought of standing still for a moment longer than necessary. After five floors she makes it to the basement level parking lot and she thanks her past self for not drinking because her car is here and that means she can leave now. 

Emily unlocks her car and throws her purse into the passenger seat not caring that it immediately slides to the floor. She climbs inside and closes the door behind her before slamming the heels of her palms against the steering wheel. 

“Fuck!” she cries, curling her hands into her hair. She feels like she’s about to explode. Everything is so wrong and she doesn’t know how to fix it. Sex with Jackson was supposed to fix it but that just made it worse and now she feels gross and dirty through no fault of his. A strangled scream tears its way up her throat. Why does she have to be like this? Why can’t she just be normal? Why can’t she just have sex with men and enjoy it?

Tears pool in her eyes and Emily angrily swipes them away. She needs to leave, to get far away from this stupid apartment complex. She starts the car and it takes nearly all of her self-control not to tear out of the parking lot. She’s already distracted, adding speeding on top of that would be a recipe for disaster. She needs to talk to someone. She wants to talk to JJ but she won’t understand and Will and the boys will be there and she just can’t. 

Emily parks along the edge of the road and pulls out her phone, opening her texts with Tara. She stares at the screen for a moment before typing, “Can I come over?” and hitting send. Emily closes her eyes and tries to calm herself while she waits for Tara’s reply. Her hands squeeze a white-knuckled grip on her steering wheel and each breath rattles in her chest. 

Her phone buzzes in her hand and she looks down.

“Come on over.”

Emily shuts her phone off and drops it into the cup holder between the seats. She wipes away the tears that had managed to fall and, checking to see if the road is clear, does a U-turn and drives toward Tara’s house. 

The turmoil Emily is experiencing makes the drive feel simultaneously seconds and hours long. She turns onto Tara’s street and parks along the curb in front of her house. She leaves her purse in the car, only grabbing her phone and keys, before climbing out and walking up the steps to Tara’s front door, locking her car behind her.

The closer she gets to the door the more panicked and ashamed she feels and by the time she knocks, she’s barely holding it together. The door swings open and Tara takes in her appearance with wide eyes and clear concern. Emily opens her mouth to speak but all that comes out is a choked sob. Tara pulls her into a hug and Emily nearly collapses in her arms. 

They stand there for a while, Emily sobbing into Tara’s shoulder, as they stand on the threshold of her house. Eventually, Emily’s crying subsides and Tara leads her inside with a hand around her waist, closing the door behind them. Tara guides Emily into the living room and onto the couch, keeping her arm around her. 

Emily leans forward to rest her head in her hands and Tara pulls her hand away to brush Emily’s hair to the side and tug on the collar of her shirt. “Emily,” Tara says softly. “Did someone—”

Emily shakes her head, recognizing the voice Tara uses when speaking to victims and realizing that there must be a hickey on her neck. That combined with the state she’s in: it’s only natural Tara assumed something had happened. “No. It was–it was consensual. It just–“ Her voice breaks.

Tara doesn’t speak, waiting silently for Emily to continue. 

“It just felt wrong,” Emily whispers. She keeps her head bowed, too ashamed to look up at her friend. “How did you do it?” 

“I’m afraid I don’t understand what you mean,” Tara says kindly. 

Emily uncovers her face and sits back against the couch, chewing on one of her nails. The tightness in her chest is still there and she doesn’t know how to say it. She doesn’t know how to ask the question she so desperately needs to ask without sounding offensive.

“You can speak your mind, Emily,” Tara says. 

Emily chuckles. Thank God for profilers.

She pinches the bridge of her nose with her free hand. “How did you let yourself be with a woman?” she whispers. 

Tara is silent for a moment. “I don’t know how to answer that question.”

Emily sighs. “I think I’m gay.” She opens her eyes and looks over to Tara to gauge her reaction. She knows she’ll be fine with it, she has a girlfriend for Christ’s sake. But this is the first time Emily’s ever said those words out loud and she’s terrified. 

Tara nods and smiles softly at her but doesn’t speak and Emily knows she can tell that she hasn’t finished saying everything she needs to.

“I’ve tried so hard not to be,” Emily admits. “I’ve had boyfriends, I’ve had sex with men.” She lets out a pained laugh. “I’ve even gotten knocked up. Did you know that, Tara? When I was fifteen and living in Italy, I dated a boy I didn’t like because I wanted to fit in and stop thinking about a girl. And we had sex that I wanted but didn’t like and he got me pregnant. My friend helped me get an abortion. All that because I didn’t want to acknowledge the fact that I liked a girl. And–and I’m doing the same thing now! I went to a bar and went home with this guy to have sex that I wanted but didn’t like, all because I want to stop thinking about a girl. Like maybe if I let enough men fuck me I’ll stop liking women. I–I know that’s not how that works and I know being gay isn’t something that needs to be fixed but I feel like I need to be.”

“Emily,” Tara says gently. “There is nothing wrong with you.”

Emily sighs. “I know that, Tara.”

“I know you know that, but I think you need to hear it. There is nothing wrong with you for liking women. I know it’s hard and it will take time but you are going to have to accept the fact that you’re gay. You can’t keep doing what you’ve been doing. It’s not healthy. And it’s not fair to yourself or to the men you’ve having sex with.”

Emily nods, leaning forward to rest her elbows on her knees. “I know it’s not. It’s just my whole life I’ve been thinking that maybe this guy, maybe this time it won’t feel wrong. Maybe this time I won’t feel gross and–and—“

She shakes her head, unsure of how to finish. 

“I know there won’t ever be a ‘this guy’ or a ‘this time’. It won’t ever feel right with a man. But that scares me, Tara. I don’t know why it scares me but it does.”

“Because it’s a scary thing. Realizing and accepting a part of yourself you tried to push away is scary and it’s hard. Especially if you’ve spent a good portion of your life hearing that that part of you was wrong like I suspect you have.”

Emily nods. “Catholic guilt,” she whispers.

“Catholic guilt,” Tara echos. “I don’t know if you still believe in God, Emily, but in case you need to hear it: you wouldn’t be gay if it wasn’t God’s intention. He made you exactly the way you’re supposed to be.”

A violent sob forces itself from Emily’s chest and she can feel her whole body shaking with the force of her crying as Tara pulls her against her chest. Emily doesn’t know if she believes in a God anymore either but knowing He doesn’t hate her fills her with relief.

Emily doesn’t know how long she and Tara stay like that, holding each other close as Tara runs her hands through her hair. But eventually, Emily’s sobs subside into sniffles. 

“It’s JJ, isn’t it?” Tara asks softly.

Emily stiffens and sits up. Tara’s hand falls into her lap. 

“What?”

“The woman you’re trying not to think about. It’s JJ, isn’t it?”

Emily opens and closes her mouth before slowly nodding. 

Tara looks across the room to a photo of her and her girlfriend. “It’s a beautiful thing, loving a woman. Don’t you think?” 

Tara looks back over to Emily, who is still looking at the photo. 

Eventually, Emily nods.

__________________

Tag List:

@lover-of-books-and-tea

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[erika111111]

Just to show everyone how truly toxic and evil these Rylan shippers really are. I rest my case.

NEVER ONCE did I say if you like a gay ship are you misogynistic or fetishize gay men. I said that specifically about the Lyan-hating Rylan shippers, NOT EVEN all of the Rylan shippers. Using the term "braindead" is ableist and disgusting (I actually lost a relative who went braindead after having a seizure so this really fucking triggered me). Apparently these people would rather use ableist insults against me than actually read my damn post, because I NEVER said that, and never would. I literally ship several gay ships, just take a look at my blog, man. Sure seems to me like some people got butthurt and despite me not calling them out specifically because these were NOT the people I was targeting with my posts, my post triggered them because they took it as a personal attack. I also said I ship LAURAMAX, not Lyan. I made a whole ass LauraMax playlist. I don't EVEN like Lyan. I stood up for the minority group that was being bullied, I'm not "hiding behind canon" to "ship my shit" or whatever. I actively ship LauraMax, there's no insecure canon shield being held here, I don't like Lyan, but again, canon is canon. I'm not wallowing in any misery, but clearly you are, or you wouldn't be attacking and mocking me behind my back when I literally didn't say a single word to you. No one's hiding behind canon. Canon is canon. If you don't understand what that means, that's your problem. And for the millionth time, not all Rylan shippers are bad, misogynistic, or fetishize gay men. I met some very nice Rylan shippers. I said the LYAN HATERS and the Chrashley/Jossam haters you get around here are. So stop accusing me of whatever bullshit you're accusing me of (homophobia, pfft, nice try, I ACTIVELY ship Blygbank, Jemily, and ChrisMike; again, how about you actually take a look at my blog and PUBLIC likes before making baseless accusations) and actually read my damn post before you get offended and sarcastic and start attacking me and making nonsensical accusations. Never once did I say that the only way to like Rylan was to be delusional, misogynistic, or fetishize gay men. Never. I specifically said I don't care what you ship. Again, it was targeted at the Lyan haters and people like them where they literally admit to that sort of thing. But okay, just make up lies about me because you're angry and miserable, that's cool too. Also I don't believe I ever said anything about race?? So I sincerely hope that part wasn't about me too. I'm literally in an interracial relationship and I'm the POC.

And seriously, how the fuck is saying someone saying it's disgusting for people to fetishize gay men render them a homophobe? That's the most nonsensical thing I've ever heard and the complete opposite of the entire point I was making with that statement. I'm LITERALLY saying it's disgusting for people to ship a gay ship if it's just because they have a fetish for gay people. We all know those people exist. Are they everyone who ships a gay ship? No, obviously not. But they exist and they're disgusting. That's the point I was making. That should've been obvious but again, I guess people can't see behind their rage to read that much. And I think just because I don't like this ONE PARTICULAR gay ship, you people were just waiting for the opportunity to call me a homophobe because it was easy even though it didn't make sense. But again, Blygbank, Jemily, ChrisMike, Jerin, and that's just from Supermassive Games. I like all kinds of ships, gay, straight, I don't care. Sexuality does not affect my opinion of any given ship. (Also, I made character playlists for the cast and put several gay artists in Dylan's, like Mike Taveira, JORDY, Passion Pit, all of whom I love dearly, and literally put a reference to Rylan but also putting Radiohead in Dylan's playlist as well, as Radioheads is the other Rylan ship name. But, you know, apparently I'm a homophobe. Whatever.)

Also, why try to attack me for being "new?" That's just weird. This blog is relatively new but I've been using Tumblr since I was 11. I didn't block anybody because I thought they wouldn't see my posts if I did, that's another crazy accusation and doesn't make a whole lot of sense. I block people I don't even hate, I just block people whose content I simply don't want to see, plain and simple. Some people view that as a stretch, yes, but I literally temporarily blocked some people who were talking about the Until Dawn remake because I didn't want to see it at the time, I had nothing against the bloggers themselves though. Who the hell would even assume blocking someone would make them unable to see YOUR posts? It's the other way around. Again, that comment was just weird. Also, for the millionth time, I said I don't care what you ship and this was not some call to get people to stop shipping Rylan. So no, I will not be dying mad. Once again, I sincerely just don't care. If you like the ship, good for you. Truly. I'm only mad now because you people shoved lies in my mouth and called me/my opinions some very insulting, disgusting things.

This fandom clearly does fucking suck. Thanks for proving it. Also even some Rylan shippers say the fandom sucks, so what say you to that? The only good in the fandom is not Rylan and I very much enjoy tons of other The Quarry content. Again, check my likes. And Lyan shippers get a whole lot of hate so why are people who don't ship Rylan the only ones who need to change and not the people actively hating the Lyan shippers? Hypocrisy.

Now block me and leave me the fuck alone. Literally attacking me for no reason. I didn't even know you three existed. There were no personal attacks and I didn't call you any names. I didn't call anybody any names, but you guys sure did. "Personal attacks, what you say about me, insults from unserious people, how insightful," you guys really thought I was talking about y'all. It's just sad. You made literally all of this stuff up. You really should calm down and actually read my posts first or maybe just ASK ME if I was talking shit about you guys behind your backs if you were concerned or offended. None of this had to happen if you just calmed down enough to communicate like adults. Yet, I'm the one not being an adult here? Okay. Your attacking me and hatred for me is completely unwarranted and unnecessary. I was talking about other people. But NOW I'm mad. @erzivy @pandanomalous @ghostradiodylan (And if there were more of you, I don't care, just block me as well and move on.)

EDIT: These people still keep shit talking me and spreading lies behind my back despite calling them out specifically and just wanting to move on. Can't have this keep affecting my day to day life and clearly nothing that I do will stop them from shit talking me and speading lies so I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and block them and stop engaging with this bullshit. The amount of lies and evil things that have been said to and about me is fucking overwhelming over a goddamn video game. This is no longer worth my time, sorry. I actually have a life unlike you people. Edit 2: It got to the point where these people are making alt accounts to continue to attack me and I just... don't have the words anymore. All I'm gonna say about this one is that I didn't put fandom wank in the tags, I don't even know what that term means, that tag was only used by the people attacking me but there were a lot of reblogs/replies so I guess it got confused somewhere. You can't force people not to tag things. And it's not "bEcAuSe i'M nEw," everything I actually did tag I did intentionally so you know, people would see it? If people with an unpopular opinion about a series can't even tag said series then you're doing nothing but intentionally silencing them because you disagree with them, plain and simple. Also the Lyan haters always tag "Lyan" and "The Quarry" in their Lyan hate posts and I don't see you complaining about them. Again, complete and total hypocrisy and it's pretty clear this argument isn't about being fair or moral, it's just about what you want and demanding that your opinion is the only one on the website. Same thing with Hackearney as well, although I also don't ship them, everybody tags "Hackearney" and "The Quarry" on their Hackearney hate posts too and I don't see you complaining about that even though there are also people in this community who are fans of and ship them too. So why does this nonsense only apply to Rylan? Hmmm. Leave me alone now. Please and thank you. Edit 3 and hopefully final, to clear my name of all the remaining slander: I was not talking about anyone on Tumblr, I was talking about people in chat/comments on Twitch and YouTube who were bashing Lyan shippers, fetishizing gay people, and ignoring canon. TheCaitlinMarie was one of the streamers/streams this happened on, I forget the others now. I was watching/participating in a lot of livestreams at the time and a lot of people were playing The Quarry to prep for the Until Dawn remake. Not everything is about you, Tumblr. You people obviously won't believe me even after citing proof, but whatever, that's your problem. I spoke my truth. Also, saying "you need better reading comprehension skills" to insult me, me calling you out for insulting me, you going back to edit and delete that portion of your post, and then accusing ME of being the one that started that insult is one of the pettiest, most childish things I've ever experienced. Just yet again proves me even more right that you people are the nasty ones desperate to make yourselves look like the good guys and demonize me. Also, laughing at/mocking someone's triggers/trauma makes you trash. And thanks for admitting to intentionally talking shit about me behind my back so you could try to get away with it. And all of you ignoring/not replying only to the specific portions of my post where literally every time I factually proved you wrong, not taking back a single slur, insult, or accusation because you're mad and embarrassed I proved you wrong. Peace. Though you'll probably never find it. Edit 4: @camillabanilla Justice Smith himself said that the "maybe neither" line meant that he was interested in Laura, so his feelings for her are canon; not the ship itself, but I quite literally never said that the ship itself was. Maybe learn something or actually read my posts before running your mouth. Thanks for proving my point as well, I'll add you to the list of toxic conclusion jumping trolls.

[villainousunsub]

tell me the truth (for if you lie, i'll break)

pairing: Jemily (ish)

rating: G

summary:

JJ and Emily talk after BAU-Gate.... or roughly tell me you didn't know, tell me all your lies and and let me believe them, tell me you didn't know and ill believe you, but don't lie to me, I can't live to know you lied to me

AO3

An open bottle of wine sat between them, take-out containers filling the trash can, and files piled high on the sides of Emily's desk. JJ played with the stem of her glass, scared to know the answer that's been burning in her heart. She watched as Emily signed another remote before throwing it into a different pile than from that which she grabbed. 

"Can I ask you something?" 

"Of course, ask me anything." 

Emily let her pen fall, all attention now on the blonde sitting across from her. It didn't take a profiler to notice the heaviness of which the question that was about to be asked was, it was felt in the air. 

"BAU-Gate...did you know?" JJ heard Emily sigh before downing the rest of her wine. 

"I was told it existed, yes. I decided not to tell the team, for a number of reasons, but Homeland Security took it over and archived it. They told me not to worry.” 

"Emily..." 

"He is just trying to get under our skin." 

"You don't know do you?" JJ set her glass down, leaning forward so that her elbows rested on her knees. "You don't know what it's turned into, what it's become thanks to them." 

"I'm not following." Emily tilted her head to the side, confusion etched through creased eyebrows and parted lips. 

"Voit and his little followers, they-" Her voice started to break as images from the site burned back in her mind. "It isn't BAU-Gate anymore Emily. They've ruined me. I've never felt so...violated.”

Emily stood, every instinct in her body on high alert. She had seen JJ breakdown before, had witnessed many first hand, but this felt different. Her chair rolled and hit the wood behind, her feet moving to take her closer and closer until she was kneeling in front of JJ. 

"Tell me everything. I need to know so I can make sure he knows what each and every punishment is for, because I swear to you JJ. If he ever sees light again, I'll make sure it's his last.”

JJ felt Emily's hand slide into her own, pulling them against her silk blouse, the thundering of heart beat heavy against their knuckles. She met her eyes, desperate to believe her. To not let Voit tear them apart. JJ wanted that reality of truth, but a seedling of doubt still laid. 

"Tell me you didn't know. Tell me you didn't and I will believe you. And if you did...please don't lie to me. I can't live knowing you lied Emily. Not after everything. Not from you." 

"I swear to you I didn't know. I swear it." Emily pulled their hands closer, her eyes threatening to water. Scared of whatever pain that laid for her, whatever pain had hurt JJ, that it would break them. 

"Okay.”

She let herself believe. To trust. And then told Emily everything. Every last detail, and when her tears had dried and she was still going. Emily cried for her.

[sucker-for-emily-prentiss]

How are you feeling about the two best friends in room meme the cm tiktok account posted lmao I still don't know where to place that "ultimate" jemily moment. Paget said it was funny so maybe the people who speculate about fake scenarios (undercover op, or an interrogation) might be on to something here. The social media intern is certainly having fun tho lol

Like I said on twitter: The crimi TikTok accounts is baiting us… and I’m taking the bait like any dumb fish in the sea…

I believe that something is going to happen for sure between them. I’m not sure what it is, I’m not sure if I’ll like it but I’m delusional enough to believe the caption the intern used about “two best friends in a room…” and maybe, just maybe, they will kiss. I’m just delusional enough. As is any Jemily fan at this point honestly.

[darcyfangirlsfrequently]

My reaction to episode 3 of season 2 of Criminal Minds Evolution

Spoilers under the cut

"Are you okay?" Emily does that man LOOK okay?????

A deepfake porn site??? that's the big secret???? is anyone else a little disappointed???

Also there's no way voit could have said all that in such little time???

Luke: a secret will fracture the team and voit knows that and told me on purpose Emily: don't play his game then. just keep it a secret. Me: .... Huh?

Is... is this going to be the Ultimate Jemily Moment???? Is there some weird fake Jemily porn on this site which is why Emily is SO adamant JJ never find out and worried Luke looked???? If that is the case, Jemily fans I am so sorry

them managing to give Penelope a cat-related opening quote is honestly HILARIOUS

Oh, THIS is where Emily's wack-o neighbor comes in. Ofc. He was a conspiracy theorist after all

Bailey mention 😭😭😭

Oh so "that was fire" is about literal fire 🤣🤣

"Can I drink lighter fluid instead?" Babygirl you are so dramatic i love you. but please keep this energy toward tyler PLEASE

and we're back on the jet!!!

Luke looks physically uncomfortable keeping this a secret from JJ

I find it hard to believe Emily didn't know JJ already knew considering how close they used to be

This jj/luke friendship is SO important to me

Luke is babysitting 🤣🤣🤣

Luke is so awkward around those girls 😂😂😂

Sydney has a point...

I think Luke just wanted to watch anything BUT anime 🤣🤣🤣 otherwise he'll get upset

Fellow Girl Dad Luke truthers how we doing with this scene?? him teaching them to play soccer???

Luke is so smiley!!!! Like @lklvz said to me, his Adam Rodriguez is slipping out. he's such a dad!!!

Brian Garrity what's up my guyyy

They changed Brian's ex-wife's name???? In "Saturday" it was Patricia and now it's Sheila

Me, the second i hear the camera click: ohhhhhhhhhh shit

I need this couple to survive. They're probably not going to but oh my god she's pregnant i need them to survive

Penelope giving herself a script for a difficult phone call is such a mood

Tyler what the FUCK, man

TYLER PUT THE SYRINGE DOWN

wtf was that scene???

aaaand he cloned his cell phone TYLER FUCKING STOP

tyler texting penelope nooo

SHE SAID "NO" HAHA YESSSS

Oh Holly.... when i saw her pulling at her sleeves i though that was what was happening. Oh my heart is breaking for this poor girl.

oh i am SOBBING

yay they saved the couple!!!!

Not Tara calling Rossi old 🤣🤣🤣

"Pilates, upper-body work, a little help from SWAT" these visuals are hilarious

Tara you are so pretty when you smile

Luke definitely didn't tell JJ everything. i can TELL by his face there is more he wants to say to her

Oh my GOD poor JJ

Tyler Green if you show up at Penelope's house while she is stress-baking I'm gonna scream

godDAMMIT

And adding to the list of Luke/Tyler similarities, this pose Tyler is making against the door is the same pose Luke made against the frame of the elevator when he and Penelope had their first on-screen interaction

Go OFF Penelope

NO. SHUT UP ABOUT THE BLACK QUEEN.

Tyler is obsessed with Penelope being the black queen. Luke just... wants her to be herself. I feel an essay coming on

Brian's about to get himself fucking shot

JJ sweetie NO don't look i PROMISE you don't want to see

shaking cam slowly drawing away from JJ's face as she sees what's on screen.... three cheers for our director! I love Adam episodes. Although this is the first one with no garvez which makes me sad

aaaand now Emily's under arrest. perfect.

Brian you FUCKER

we are 3/3 so far for Emily saying "fuck" in an episode 🤣

[vhsrights]

jemily secret dating headcanon?

ohhh I have so many ideas!! here are just a few :)

Emily starts wearing an extra hair tie on their other wrist; when asked about it, she just says that she breaks a lot of them in the field (no one believes her)

JJ starts to smell like Emily's VERY EXPENSIVE French shampoo

Em doesn't talk to Morgan for a full day after he took her seat next to JJ on the jet (and cozied up to her) for the flight to and back from a case

They show up to Girl's Nights in each other's PJs/Hoodies

Both nearly kill someone out of worry every time the other is in the field with an unsub whose victimology matches them (ie: Em nearly cutting the blood circulation off in Morgan's arm when they hear that JJ got in a confrontation over comms)

Garcia and Tara have to pretend that they didn't see JJ hastily pull off Em in club bathrooms when they go out

One time when they're out to dinner with the team, JJ and Tara get up to go to the bathroom and accidentally switch seats when they get back. Em is talking to Reid and doesn't notice, proceeding to put her hand on Tara's leg. She almost yelps when she realizes and the whole team laughs while Em and JJ just try really hard not to look at each other.

People keep telling them they make a great couple and they horribly lie their way out of it

When there aren't enough hotel rooms on a case, they leave to room together before everyone else even discusses (even after Tara and PG start coming with them)

A lot of times when they get called in on days off, JJ and Emily almost answer each other's phones

They keep secret sticky note messages to talk to each other on paperwork days (it's more fun and involved than texting)

They come up with a series of inconspicuous facial expressions and hand signals say things like I love you and I miss you at work

One time PG comes with the BAU on a case, and the lead detective won't stop hitting on Emily. JJ nearly commits murder but keeps it cool to not blow their cover. However, later JJ and Emily are returning from sneaking off to talk in another room and almost walk in on PG chewing out the detective. She's talking about how JJ and Em are dating and to not step on the teams toes. The couple walk away so that they don't get caught but can't stop laughing when they get to the hotel that night

[captainstressed]

so ive been trying to cover the jemily drama from episode 3 for w e e k s and ive got something but not a lot. its more of a drabble than anything but its angsty and hurt/comfort and i may add to it in the future but for now here we go.

trigger warnings for baugate themes and also a panic attack.

Injure. Jean. Fear.

To see yourself plastered across a pornographic website on the deep web; there weren’t words to describe it. Having your own face staring back at you through the screen, partaking in acts that would turn the stomach of even the most hardened agents. JJ’s first desire was to slam her laptop shut, scrub raw the inside of her mind to rid herself of what she was seeing. But she couldn’t. For some reason she felt frozen in place, forced to stare ahead and witness what the person on the screen was doing. The person who had stolen her face, taken the very thing that was hers and hers alone. Her identity.

JJ felt physically sick. Her entire body trembled as she finally managed to shut the laptop and push it away from her. She couldn’t blink without the images flashing behind her eyes like some sick slideshow. Luke had been right; it was convincing. It was almost like an out of body experience. JJ knew it wasn’t her, knew she hadn’t committed these acts. But seeing her own face, attached to a body that looked disgustingly similar to hers.

Her stomach lurched; she covered her mouth and searched the room for a trash bin, barely catching herself as she stumbled across the room and landed hard on her knees before losing the meagre contents of her stomach.

She wrapped her arms around herself, feeling raw and empty.

How far had this content spread? How many people that had seen these images and videos believed they were actually her?

What if?

She retched in spite of her empty stomach, the thought of her boys either finding it themselves or having it shown to them had her insides twisted into knots.

JJ couldn’t even begin to fathom how she would explain it, she felt as though her own mind was betraying her. Her vision blurred; she hadn’t even realised she was crying. Flashes of what she had seen replayed on a loop inside her head, her breaths passing shaky as panic set in.

-

Thats how Emily found her.

Worry took over and she didn’t bother to announce herself before rushing to JJ’s side. Emily wasn’t initially aware of the state her friend was in or how she had gotten in such a state in the first place. It was clear that JJ hadn’t registered Emily’s presence but that didn’t stop her from reaching out.

Almost instantly JJ recoiled; not unlike a dear spooked by headlights. She held herself tighter with one arm and held the other out towards Emily, a clear sign not to come any closer.

“Don’t touch me.”

Emily held up her hands, not wanting to agitate JJ further. She had no idea what had sent her friend into such a state and it scared the absolute shit out of her.

JJ’s lips were moving but with her voice barely above a whisper, broken by gasps of breath she was struggling to take, Emily had no idea what she was trying to say. She was trapped in her mind and working herself up further.

“JJ, honey, you need to breathe.”

Emily’s hands hovered over JJ’s arms but didn’t make contact. The latter shook her head and it gave Emily only the slightest bit of relief that she could hear her.

“You’re having a panic attack.”

Her voice was low and calm despite feeling the exact opposite. She wanted nothing more than to reach out and pull JJ into her arms but decades of training had her knowing it was the last thing that would help right now.

JJ tried to latch onto Emily’s voice; the disgust sat heavily in the pit of her stomach but the fear hit her in waves and had her feeling like she was drowning.

“Concentrate on your breathing JJ, try and match my breaths.”

Emily took a chance and grasped JJ’s free hand, grateful when she didn’t fight her again. She held it to her chest and breathed deeply before releasing, encouraging JJ to do the same.

“Thats it JJ, you’re doing great.”

JJ tried to focus all of her energy on Emily; her voice, her breathing. She curled her fingers around one of the lapels on her coat, it was soft and she let her mind wonder to how warm and safe it would feel to be wrapped in it. 

It was enough of a distraction for her breaths to resume a semi normal pace; not enough to rid her mind of the reason she had gotten into this state in the first place however.

“Em,”

Her voice cracked when she spoke; she managed to meet Emily’s eye for the fraction of a moment before a sob forced its way up her throat. This time Emily didn’t hold back, letting go of JJ’s hand to pull her in for a hug. With them both sort of sat on the floor it was a slightly awkward angle but that didn’t stop JJ from melting into her arms and holding on for dear life.