#jason/jazz

[catpriciousmarjara]

DC x DP

Bruce finds out Dick is dating Dan(Dark Danny) Phantom

Bruce: You can't date an eldritch ghostly abomination!

Dick: Oh my god Bruce don't be so ectophobic

Bruce: He destroyed the world and killed us all!

Dick: ooooh come on that was like an entire timeline ago. Get over it already! Ghosts change! He even did community service.

Bruce: You still can't date someone that murderous!

Dick: You dated Khoa! I was there for that mess!

Bruce: That was different!

Dick: Oh it was? Then I guess I'll go and date Slade then! How about that huh?

Bruce: ......

Bruce: Eldritch abomination is fine. Bring him around for dinner.

The batsiblings watching this all happen from the sidelines - entertained as fuck

(Later)

Tim: So are you gonna tell Bruce you're seeing Jazz or?

Jason: oh hell no

[theglamorousferal]

Persephone's Binding Part 15

Hardcover/Anger Management ship Sacrificial Bride au

AO3 Prompt Part 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16

“So my day consists of training, then meeting with the scholars and then paperwork for the afternoon. What’ll you all be up to?” Asked Jazz as she sliced into her french toast.

“Ellie and I are going to check in with Johnny to see how the bike is coming, and because Ellie needs a touch-up on her hair.” He said and scrubbed the top of Ellie’s head, messing her hair further than the bed-head she had left it in that morning. She swatted at him and yawned like a lion, canines on full display.

“Yeah yeah, I still don’t get why we had to be up this early.” She moaned and took a comically large bite, her cheeks puffing out like a chipmunk.

“I guess you don’t want to see if he’ll make you one then?” She stilled, syrup dripped from the piece of french toast on her fork hanging halfway between her plate and her mouth. She slowly turned her head to face him, the rest of her body still eerily unmoving.

“Are you serious?” She asked, tone like that of someone receiving life-changing news. Danny’s grin widened and he nodded. She shrieked happily.

“Hey, you’d be roughly the right age to be able to work on getting your motorcycle license if we were still on Earth, I don’t see why we can’t get started on planning for your birthday soon.” Danny found himself tackled by an ecstatic Ellie. “You do still need to learn how though. You can learn from any of us, though Jazz or Dante would probably be the most patient and not call you names while teaching you.” He patted her on the head and righted them so they could stand again and they took their seats, Ellie digging into the food with more enthusiasm than before.

“I could also teach you once I get mine. I taught Damian how to for emergencies, and he’s smaller than you are.” Jason offered while reaching for the syrup. He poured liberally before setting it back down again. 

“We still need to teach you how to ride an ecto-bike.” Danny pointed at him with his spoon. “There are some pathways in the Realms, but for the most part you’re basically flying. You have to kind of imagine there’s ground beneath you for it to work, we can show you once the bike’s finished.”

“Fair enough.” He took a bite while he mulled over his next question. “I meant to ask, but I noticed two rather conspicuous mounts at the training grounds. Who do the techy horse and the purple cat belong to?”

Danny got a big, stupid smile on his face and the two sisters shared a fond look. “Those belong to my partners, Tucker and Sam respectively. Tucker is a whiz with tech stuff and has some Egyptian royalty ancestry, so he modeled his ride off that. The cat is Sam’s, Skulker gave them to her as a kitten during the Christmas Truce, but he didn’t tell any of us that they’d grow to be the size of a horse. Sam was unable to keep them at her house, so they live at the castle. Now that Sam’s moved into the castle, they get to spend more time with each other, outside of college classes that is.” Jason nodded along at this.

“You said they’d be here at the end of the week right?” Jazz asked.

“Yeah, they should be here in a couple of days.” Danny replied as he finished off his plate. Ellie already had and was practically vibrating in her impatience. He took a bit longer than necessary to finish his glass of milk, purposefully drawing out the time to irritate her further.

“Come on Danny! Let’s get going!” She hauled him out of his chair as soon as he set the glass down, much to Danny’s amusement. He let it be known by full-belly chuckling.

“Alright alright. I’ll see you two later, don’t kill each other in training, alright?” Danny leveled them each with a serious look. It was not as effective as he thought, because mischief and amusement still glittered in his eyes.

“No blood, got it.” Said Jazz, giving him a thumbs up. Jason nodded in affirmation. Danny seemed satisfied with that as he turned to leave the room. Jazz turned to Jason.

“So, besides joining me for training this morning, what were you planning on doing today?”

“Oh, I was thinking of probably looking through the library catalog and see if I can find any information on Dionesium. I didn’t know that was in my system, and while I’ve heard of it, we don’t really have a lot of information on it. I think I might be able to pin down my universe if I can find where the stuff is. Frostbite mentioned that it’s usually just in the Realms, so if we can find a way to track that substance, then we should be able to track what dimensions it’s in, right?”

Jazz got a contemplating look on her face. “Chances are that it fell through a natural portal from here in the Realms to wherever you’re from. I know Tucker was working on something that would allow for dimensional tracking, he wanted to get it done before Danny went and explored space in that one dimension he was looking at. I think he’s just in the planning phases right now, but that’s probably because there’s no real time crunch. We can talk with him, and I’ll see when I talk to the scholars later if they can obtain a sample of it. Oh, speaking of Frostbite, he said he’d be back in a couple of days with the medicine for you to flush out the toxins in your core.”

Jason blinked. He had forgotten about that. “Cool, does this mean I’ll get powers or something once I’m healed?”

“It’s very possible. We haven’t found records of someone with a blended proto-core of ectoplasm and Dionesium before, so we’re going with what we’d expect of a highly liminal human for you. It’s possible you’ll have side effects from the Dionesium like Frostbite said.” He clenched his fist on the table, his lips in a tight line and his eyes scrunched shut as he remembered that he was likely immortal now. Jazz set a hand on his wrist, just below his fist. He looked up at her in surprise. She had a soft, sad smile on her face.

“Jason, if you ever need a place, if it ever gets to be too much once you’re back home, I’ll leave you with a one-time summoning circle and you can always come here and stay with us. All of us are functionally immortal too. We’re so closely tied to death magics that even if we die, we’ll become a full ghost. Unless somebody Ends us,” her eyes flashed yellow “and it will take an apocalypse for that to happen, then we will always be here.” She squeezed his arm in comfort, drawing her thumb across his skin. They sat like that for a bit, both lost in their own thoughts. 

Eventually, Jason sighed and drew his hand from under her grip and brought her hand to his lips. He looked deeply into her eyes as he spoke, “It would be my pleasure to stay with you, your majesty.” Jazz flushed bright red up to her ear tips and down her neck and squeaked. He smiled at her and let her hand go. “I’m going to go get ready for training, I’ll meet you at the grounds?”

She just sort of absent-mindedly nodded and waved him off with a shocked and thoughtful look on her face. He smirked to himself, proud to have gotten that response from her. He jogged to his quarters and armored up.

*   *   *   *   *

Jason was fully aware of the fact that it was now him that was stunned when breath caught in his throat as he saw Jazz at the training grounds in full armor. She was glorious. She stood to her full height, her helm, for the crown had morphed to an actual helm, made it seem she was taller. Her hair was braided down her back and had a golden cuff at the end of it. She wore her Amazonian armor in its black with a symbol on the front, and teal pants tucked into tall armored black boots. Her well-muscled arms were on display with her bracers firmly in place. A gold and black shield was strapped to her back and her sword was at her hip. She was standing and talking with the tall knight Danny had spoken to previously.

“No Frighty, it’s just a friendly spar, we’re not going to first blood, I’m gonna be fine.” She had her hands on her hips as she glared up at the knight.

“Apologies your majesty, I was merely concerned considering you performed the Ritual yesterday. I do not wish you to either burn yourself out or to accidentally harm the Sacrifice.”

“His name is Jason.” She crossed her arms. “And he has advanced healing and strength too, so it’s fine.” 

The knight slumped. “Very well. I shall clear the field as it seems your partner for the day has arrived.” He turned to face the grounds at large. “All of you, off to your next duties, it is time for the Queen’s training. You know where to go, off with you all!” He shouted and gestured with his arms for them to leave. He then turned to Jazz and bowed, before swirling his cape and vanishing himself in a swirl of purple flames.

Jason whistled as he approached. “I should never let B or really any of the bats or birds meet that guy. They’d be trying to figure out that trick for weeks.” He paused for a moment. “Actually, Cass’d probably get it, and Duke can technically do that already, just without the cape.”

“And they’re all baseline humans? I thought I had the strange family of the two of us.” She remarked. They made their way to the center sparring ring. She set her shield and sword at the fenceline and dropped into some stretches. Jason started warming up as well, dropping into push-ups. 

“Duke is a meta-human. He was born with the ability to have powers and then something happened to him to activate them. It’s a trauma response.” He paused in his reps for a moment and considered the rest of the family. “If dying and coming back is a thing that makes you more than baseline, then I think at least Damian and Cass would qualify. Oh and Steph.” 

“You would have to have at least started to form into a ghost to be considered liminal from a near-death or death-and-resuscitation experience. Were any of them exposed to the same magic liquid, Lazarus Water you called it?” She was sitting with one leg extended as she stretched as far as she could over it, bending herself nearly in half.

“Oh yeah, I don’t think B ever got dunked in it, but he was around it for a few years. Dami grew up around it and definitely got a bath in it at one point. I think Cass did too. Tim was around the stuff for a few months, I’m not sure if that would count.” He started doing squats.

“Probably only counts if you were dunked in it. We’ll have to see if they need to filter stuff out of their systems too.” She stood and made her way over to a bench by the fence of the ring, where she grabbed a couple of water bottles and started to chug one. “Do we want to start with hand-to-hand, or go straight to swords? Danny said you dual-wield?” She whipped her braid over her shoulder and handed him the water bottle.

Jason stood as well and tilted his head considering. He took a sip from the bottle, then spoke. “Yeah I do. Let’s start with hand-to-hand and we’ll work up to swords. Then maybe we can work through some forms as a cool down? Diana taught me some Amazonian ones that I’m a little rusty on.” He thought for a moment, taking another draw of water, before suggesting further. “If we still have time we can do some target practice. Danny mentioned you’re a good shot.”

Jazz nodded along. “Yeah that sounds good to me. I’m ready whenever you are.” She jogged to the center of the ring and started bouncing on her feet like a boxer.

Jason smiled and set down the bottle of water and jogged to join her. “Bring it on Queenie.” He waved her forward.

[ew-selfish-art]

So I’ve been obsessed with the concept of the Jazz/Jason ship (putting blame and gratitude on @gilbirda for it living rent free in my brain from their fics) and particularly what that would look like if they were established sans all the millions of secrets they both have. So then I got sappy and in my feels and wrote almost 10k words about it.

The result of this is “Sonnet 29 at the end” and the summary below:

Relationships and how to navigate them... A difficult thing when secrets must be kept.

Jazz and Jason are 'dating' and it turns out that one phone call makes it entirely too obvious that her brother 'works' with his family and their friends in 'book club'. Things change up pretty dramatically for their status as a couple once they start to accept the honest truth of it all.

…

So like go read it if that’s your thing idk.

[dcxdpdabbles]

Jason: Hi!

Danny: Good evening

Jason: Oh um, yes, good evening. Do you eat to survive?

Danny: What?

Jason: Ha ha ha! I'm joking! Of course you eat, um I eat too! But why?

Danny: I don't-what are you asking me?

Jason: Gotham is beautiful at night! It's when I eat!

Danny: Are you a-

Dick appearing out of nowhere: Hey there, Jay. You wandered off while I was getting us water. Sorry about him. He's very drunk. I'll take him home to sleep it off.

Danny: *Grabbing Jason's writ* Do you know him?

Jason: Yes, he's my brother. See, that's my family. *Shows lock screen of family* I have many siblings, which means I would be totally fine with lots of kids!

Danny: *Let's go* Oh good. Sorry if he's really that drunk I didn't want him going home with a stranger. No offense

Dick: None taken. I appreciate men like you who keep everyone safe. Come along Jay, let's get you home.

Jason: But-

Dick: You asked me to step in when you were going out of control. Remember?

Jason: Right yes. Ugh Bye.

Danny: Goodbye.

Dick outside of bar: That was terrible. You really do suck at flirting.

Jason: I just froze up! Ugh I hope he doesn't think I'm a idiot.

Danny watching them through the window: That's a vampire pretending to be human. I can smell the undead on him and he was going to lure me to a dark alley if his human servant hadn't stepped in.

Jazz: I was gone for like five minutes Danny, how did you find a creature of the night within that time?

Danny: It's a gift. Thankfully, I'm too smart to be tricked by a vampire.

Jazz: ......you would have followed him into the alley wouldn't you?

Danny: He may be a blood sucker but did you see his muscles? What a way to die.

[demonic0angel]

Court Story Idea

TW: the Joker

Where the Joker is being prosecuted for his crimes within the Ghost Zone and each side (defendant and plaintiff) is able to choose the lawyer for the other side. So that means that the Joker is able to choose an attorney for the plaintiffs AKA Jason, along with other victims, both alive and dead. (For drama’s sake, let’s say that the Justice League is there too, along with the younger generation of heroes.)

When everyone hears this, they’re like ??? Because isn’t that just going to help the Joker??

And the Joker, realizing this, is looking for the most weakest, most vulnerable person to exploit within this ghostly court room and he looks at the back of the room…

And finds Jazz, who’s sitting in a corner behind King Phantom, head down, trying her best to be unnoticed, nose in her papers as she’s writing down what’s said as the court reporter.

And the Joker picks her.

Nobody understands why everyone from the Ghost Zone is suddenly either 1) flabbergasted, 2) completely delighted, or 3) laughing so hard that it’s like they’re about to die a 2nd time.

Because the Joker chose the only person in the room with an actual law degree who is not only the big sister of the literal Ghost King, but also loves children, is fiercely protective of them, and most importantly, has never gotten the opportunity to show off her hard earned degrees in criminology, psychiatry, or law until now.

(Inspired by this post where someone says that Jazz would be the court reporter)

[caffeinatedvigilantewriter]

So Damian is in college, and he’s continued being a vigilante, but people are starting to get a bit suspicious when he leaves during a rouge attack. He needs someone to be his alibi, and it has to be someone he can realistically be around alone for long periods of time.

Enter Danielle Jane Masters. She’s an archaeology major, and is currently looking for a place to live that’s not a dorm. Quiet enough to to slip by, but is also a presence that’s impossible to fully ignore. She’s also pretty and smart enough for their ‘relationship’ to not be a total shock

Damian offers his apartment in exchange for her to be his fake girlfriend.

~

Dani’s attending GU, and after her roommate infested her dorm with mutated cockroaches, she decides that she’s done with the dorm hall.

She can’t exactly find a place to stay with roommates willing to overlook her halfa oddities (doesn’t eat much/at all, eyes glow, etc) and she can’t afford rent on her own (and she would not be asking Vlad for money). Jazz and Danny have enough on their plate, with Danny taking his rightful throne and Jazz getting a PhD in Star City.

Dani also is keeping a low profile, partly due to the GIW and partly due to the bats, who might run her out of town before she finishes her degree.

So having a fake boyfriend to keep her cover as a normal college student is perfect. All she has to do is be a good fake girlfriend until she graduates and she can leave town.

Why Damian needs a fake girlfriend is none of her business, but she suspects hes involved in crime.

They mostly ignore each other, but over time they develop a small friendship and a ‘friends with benefits’ type of thing even though they’re already ‘dating’.

Shenanigans in no particular order:

- Damian notices Dani doesn’t eat much, and gets pretty concerned, especially after he realizes she also doesn’t sleep (halfa stuff)

- Dani gets the flu, and Damian goes full doctor mode. Turns out Dani not only hates being cared for, she’s also clingy when she’s sick

- Dani doesn’t come back one night, so Damian goes out to look for her and finds her as a sacrifice for a cult meant to bring ‘peace and harmony’ to the world. They take her blood and before they add it to the circle, all the power cuts out. Damian heads back to the apartment to find Dani waiting for him, saying she was ‘so worried’ (She was. She sensed he was near during the ritual and caused a city-wide blackout and slipped out invisibly and intangibly)

-the Waynes are entirely convinced that Dani and Damian are actually dating, and Damian goes: ‘these fucking idiots. I wonder how long we can fool them.’ Surprisingly, Danis up for the challenge, and Damian invites her to a gala, where they pretend to be the most in love couple then can be without making it obvious they’re faking. Has Dani always stared at him like this?

-Jon visits, and even he’s convinced. That’s when Damian realizes that he actually wants to date Dani

-Something happens to Dani’s room/bed (maybe it’s flooded, the frame snaps, etc) and suddenly it’s just one bed

-that same night, one of Damian’s sibling slip through Damian’s window bc they’re injured and just see Damian and Dani and it’s just really awkward, especially if one of them wakes up.

-if it’s Dani that wakes up, she just sees a shadow at the foot of the bed, realizes Damian’s sleeping right next to her, and she grabs the nearest lamp and throws it. The person crumples to the ground and Dani finally turns on the light to see a vigilante on the ground unconscious.

- if it’s Damian, he’s just really embarrassed while the vigilante thinks it’s cute. Damian ends up trying to get his sibling to leave while also trying to not wake up Dani, who eventually smothers him with a pillow trying to get him to shut up.

-it turns out they sleep way better when the others there, so they make excuses to stay

-Danny stops by for an hour and is promptly not fooled by their charade and accuses Damian of holding her hostage. Barbara or Tim decide to hack into his apartment’s security camera and catches the part of the conversation where Danny threatens Damian

-one of them gets partnered with a member of the opposite gender, and the other is wildly jealous about it

-one of them gets a stalker and they spot the stalker in public, and in order to ward them off, they start making out with the other. The stalker posts the photos on the internet

-a talk show wants to have an interview with them, and they play a game (“what’s their favorite color? “What’s their biggest pet peeve” etc). They answer every question correctly.

-they have a public pretend fight that gets a little too real

-Jason or Steph finds out and they help Damian plan an apology date

-someone insults Damian too Dani’s face and Dani snaps. There’s yelling, video recordings, and a whole bunch of shit and Dani doesn’t even realize Damian’s standing right behind her, approaching her to ask her out on that apology date.

-Dani gets invited out by some of her friends and they ditch her and Dani’s drunk, has no ride, and is feeling extremely uncomfortable, so she calls Damian, who drops whatever he’s doing to come get her

-Damian gets home late after a rough patrol and Dani fell asleep at the counter waiting for him because she was worried

-fake proposal. Even better if it’s not planned at all, and they’re just like “do you to marry me?” “Ok sure.” “👍”

Any more ideas? Not sure how it’ll end, so i want to see your suggestions

[bloomeng]

batman and his merry band of robins

[thespoonunderyourbed]

Intro for Jazz

Jazz: ambushes The Red Hood with a baseball bat Jason: looks at the girl who just tried to take his head off with a baseball bat, grateful for the fact that helmets exist "And you are?" Jazz: about to swing again Give me back my brother!" Jason: "You mean the kid who ran away out of fear that he was going to get dissected? He did say he had a sister, guessing that's you." Jazz: "where is my brother?" swings again Jason: catches blow on armored gauntlet, "At my apartment, want to go see him?" Jazz: stops swinging "Yes." Later: Jason and Jazz: staring at Danny who has tied up Nightwing to a chair. Nightwing: "little Wing!, Jason, Brother dearest, please save me." Danny: "You know this guy dad? Jazz is that you?" Jason and Jazz: "Yes."

[blueboybot]

Can You Hold This For Me?

Jason is enamored as he watches a beautiful red head lady beat the shit out of the mugger that got too close for her liking.

He was on his way to the local book store to find a good read when he saw a woman with her month old baby being stalked by a man who was obviously hiding a knife in his pocket. Jason immediately crossed the street to put himself between them and the mugger when all of a sudden the man got a little closer and the woman executed a perfectly good roundhouse kick to the man's head while keeping her baby secure.

After the man's body bounced in the alley and hit a trash can she turned to Jason with a brilliant smile that did something to his resurrected heart.

"Can you hold this for me?" She asked before simply putting the baby in Jason's arms before he could reply.

She then proceeded to pick the man up, who was twice her size, and flung him further into the alley before running up to finish her beat down.

A noise brought his attention from the woman to the baby in his arms who was now up and cooing at him curiously.

"Your mom's hot."

[corkinavoid]

DPxDC De-Aged Triplets and Their Tired Single Sister

Jason has seen the four of them a couple of times in Crime Alley now. They looked like a family, what with similar facial features- err, actually, the kids looked like carbon copies of each other, but their mom/sister/aunt/cousin looked similar enough to be related to them by blood.

Normally, Jason didn't care for each and every family that moved into Crime Alley. Sure, he cared about all of them as a whole, but there were a lot of people, and he couldn't possibly get elbow deep in every life story he came across. So all he knew about them were three things: a) they were on the run from someone or something, b) they trusted each other and no one else, and c) apparently, they have made it their life goal to never make any kind of sense.

The list of shit they have gotten into included but was not limited to:

• one of the kids biting a gun. Not the hand of the attacker who was holding it, no, the actual gun. And he bit a piece of it clean off, which earned him - or her, actually, Jason knew one of the triplets was a girl but he couldn't tell them apart - a lecture from their... mom? sister? parental figure. The lecture was about how chewing metal does not help with iron deficiency.

• getting kidnapped and creeping out their kidnapper to the point of him returning the kids back home. A few witnesses said one of the kids was actually driving, sitting on the kidnappers lap behind the steering wheel and cheerfully commanding the man to speed up or brake. Their mom actually apologized to the kidnapper for the incident and offered him homemade cookies for his troubles. He ran away without them.

• driving a lady at the laundromat insane by repeatedly walking inside and climbing into one of the washing machines. They never got out of it, just one kid walking into the laundromat, climbing into washing machine, then another kid, looking exactly like the previous one, walking inside, climbing into the same washing machine, then another kid walking into the laundromat- well, you get the idea. The lady claimed she's seen at least five kids do that in a row, but when she looked into that washing machine, there was no one inside.

• casually falling out of windows. Or, better, walking out of them like they were doors, at any given opportunity. The witness - an old man who was helping their mom with groceries - said the mom did not care in the slightest, and when he asked her about it, obviously concerned, she just said, tired and exasperated, 'they like the feeling of free fall, don't worry, they'll come back in a minute'. Sure enough, they did, not a scratch on them. The family lived on the sixth floor.

• eating insane amounts of food. Jason personally witnesses their mom give them her wallet, telling the kids, 'eat until you're full', and promptly passing out on the table, her head on her arms. The kids then proceeded to eat four whole pizzas, three burgers each, then seven brownies and at least five cups of soda. What was interesting about it was not only the amount of food they ate but the way they never left their mom unattended, one of the kids always staying beside her sleeping figure as the other two went to order.

And now, all four of them were standing in front of him. Not Jason Todd him, but Red Hood him. And he was... confused.

"I'm sorry, what?"

"I said, can you watch them for a few hours? Three, maybe four," the mom, Jazz as she introduced herself, was looking at him like it was he who was speaking nonsense, not her. Because asking a crime lord to watch three kids in the middle of the night is not something a sane person would do.

"Why?" He asks, bewildered, because what the fuck else is he supposed to say?

"I need to kill a man, and if they come with me, it will take three times longer," Jazz tells him. Is she saying the kids slow her down or what? Jason can admit he's never been this confused in his entire life.

"You could ask me to kill a man, while you stay with them, no?" He tries to reason, but the girl waves him off:

"No, that will take even longer. Besides, no offense, but you kill people to simply end their life, and I need that man to fucking stop existing forever."

What's the difference he almost wants to ask. But instead of that, he just sighs.

"Why me? I'm sure you could find a babysitter-"

"No babysitter will handle them. The last one told me they have been running laps on the ceiling, which is, actually, not that big of a deal. They are kids. Kids like running around," she huffs, and Jason suspects she is missing the point here, but okay. He gets why babysitters are not an option.

"You do understand what they can witness if they stay here?" He asks, as the last attempt to reason with the girl, but she just nods and leans down, making all the kids turn to her.

"Okay, you menaces, tell me what not to do while you're staying with Mr. Red Hood."

"No eating people," one kid starts.

"No driving people insane," the other one continues.

"No, um, stealing eyeballs," the third one finishes, and what the fuck are those ground rules? Is this girl a mother to eldrith horrors? That would explain some shit.

Jazz turns to him, "See? They're all good."

In what world is that good? Jason debates if he should start running now or when she leaves.

"Do they have names?" He asks instead. The girl nods:

"Danny." His surprise must be evident even through the mask because she sighs and points to each kid, "Diane, Daniel, Dante. Dani, Danny, and Dan. Actually, you know what, let's make this easier," she rummages through her bag and gets a marker out before gesturing to the kids, "Come here."

As they do, she proceeds to draw numbers 1, 2, and 3 on their foreheads. Then she nods to Hood and puts the marker away.

"Okay, that's better. Behave, you monsters, I'll be back soon!"

After she leaves, Jason looks down at the kids. They also look at him, eerie and unblinking.

Finally, one of them - number 2, Dani, if he is not mistaken - asks:

"Do you want teeth? We have a lot."

"She doesn't mean her teeth," number 1 clarifies, "She means other teeth."

...This is going to be some very long three hours.

[catpriciousmarjara]

DP x DC: Dick's Totally Normal Date?

Inspired by that one juju sanpo where Yuuji thought Megumi was being hit on and he, Nobara, and Gojo pull out their ridiculous Formation B to drive away the potential date. And I thought, 'this, but batfam, but veer wildly to the left, with DP'. So here you go.

Third floor study, Wayne Manor

"Thank you all coming on such short notice", Tim said, eyes serious, one hand on the pile of documents on the table.

His siblings nodded at him, faces grave, except for Duke who just looked confused.

"I'm sure all of you already know why this meeting was called-

"I don't actually know why we are here", Duke interrupted.

He was thoroughly ignored.

-and are just waiting for confirmation. But the wait is now over. I have here the results."

His siblings all leaned forward, except for Cass who was too chill for that, apprehension radiating through their frames. Though Duke was more confused than apprehensive.

Tim sighed. "It's true. Dick is dating."

Gasps ran through the group.

Tim dropped the bigger bomb. "And its not a redhead."

Jason cursed as he leaned back in his chair, face directed at the ceiling exasperatedly. Steph brought a fist down on the table, shaking her head. Cass simply placed an elbow on arm of her chair, chin supported by the back of her hand. Damian just scoffed.

Duke looked at all of them still trying to see what the issue was and why they were even here doing this. Tired of being out of the loop the young man decided to just go ahead and bite the bullet.

"Question!", he began,"Why is Dick dating someone a problem?"

They all stared at him.

Jason raised an eyebrow. "Dude, he dated a witch king that tried to make us all into creepy dolls just a year and a half ago. The bastard almost turned everyone in Gotham into literal hamster plushies when they broke up."

"His immediate rebound after that relationship was the alien that tried to hunt him for sport", Steph contributed helpfully.

Jason waved an arm towards her while looking Duke, as if asking him why he wasn't getting the point.

And Duke...really wasn't getting the point. In fact he seemed to be getting even more confused.

"Dick's a habitual monsterfucker, old news, so what? And it isn't as if every single one of you haven't had some kind of romantic relationship with non-humans before. Even Damian's dated Jon! Besides Heira did not turn us all into hamsters. That was a joke. Aaaand Ga-va'se is a great guy and he definitely wasn't a rebound. Also he and Dick broke up really amicably and they still meet up for boba and he gives us really cool alien shit so I don't know why you guys don't like him."

"Duke, Ga-va'se hunted us for sport", Tim said from the side.

"That was because we were in his hunting grounds! Plus he apologized for that!", Duke defended his alien buddy. The guy was really nice! What was their hang up with him? Sure he was a bit murderous but hey, Duke dared his siblings to find one person from each of their social circles who wasn't a bit murderous and insane. Sure he hunted them for the better part of five days in a terrifying alien jungle a galaxy away from home but that was honestly their fault for intruding on the hunting grounds of his people in the first place. Plus it was all a misunderstanding!

"I agree with Thomas", Damian said as he thumbed through the files Tim had distributed among them. Across from him Cass was doing the same thing, rapidly turning the pages. "Partially at least. The Yautja was a worthy candidate for Grayson's hand-

"You just like him because he got you that sword, Demon Spawn", Jason drawled in that assholish tone of his that never failed to incense Damian.

-Shut it Todd! Ahem. As I was saying Ga-va'se was worthy but Heira was an imbecile. Unfortunately there are more Heiras in Grayson's romantic history than Ga-va'ses so it would be prudent for all of us to remain vigilant", the youngest member of the Wayne family finished, closing the file decidedly. "Especially if his current choice isn't a redhead."

Duke had to ask. "Again whats up with the hair colour thing?"

Tim looked at Steph pointedly. "Officer Stephanie Brown please proceed with orientation."

A truly terrifying grin bloomed on Steph's face. She stood up from her chair and walked to the wall, pulling down a projector screen. A click of a button and it came alive, with what looked like an honest to god power-point presentation on Dick's dating life. Tim slid Duke an brochure of all things.

"Dick's choice of romantic partners can be classified into three categories", she began as if she was a lecturer. She was even wearing glasses. "Redheads, which everyone and their third aunt's weird dog knows about, morally ambiguous older men, and extremely dangerous non-humans. There are outliers of course, and overlaps, but generally he tends to keep his choices confined to these groups. Turn to page 3 please."

Duke dutifully turned to page 3, which looked like it contained profiles of the various people Dick's dated in the past. If it was any other family this would be a gross invasion of privacy.

"Exhibit A- Barbara Gordon, great taste, mostly downhill from here I'm afraid. Exhibit B-Slade Wilson aka The Terminator, no I'm not kidding, the entire thing is weird and toxic. And Exhibit C-the weird eldritch thing Dick dated two years ago who I'm pretty sure is Cthulhu's actual cousin who made us all taste colours for a week straight."

"Deathstroke?", Duke exclaimed, weirded out.

Jason raised an eyebrow. "Thats who bothered you? Not Cthulhu's cousin?"

Duke huffed. "Their name is Umh'uidrritl and I know where to draw the line."

Tim side-eyed him. "On a whiteboard with an old marker maybe."

"Hey!"

"Back to my very important power-point that no one else is going to interrupt-",Steph said as she glowered at them, "-mapping Dick's dating history shows us that the more volatile of his partners tend to cause trouble post-breakup. A deeper investigation would reveal that while his harem of redheads mainly just stir up delicious, juicy drama, hot tea and angst all around baby, bless their souls, his harem of morally ambiguous older men, and harem of extremely dangerous non-human entities tend to lean towards more destructive reactions. While the former is content with kidnapping and threatening and the assorted standard yandere meltdowns-

"Yandere?", Damian murmured.

Jason just snorted.

-the latter likes to cause damage on a larger scale". The blonde gestured with a flourish and a new slide popped up.

"Exhibit A- That time Gotham almost got gobbled up like a light snack by that space whale pet of the Ryagonian emperor. Exhibit B- That time a Fairy Queen tried to spirit Dick away and almost put the entire city into an enchanted coma, which was honestly kinda festive, I'd never been more well rested. Exhibit C- That entire thing with the tentacles that we are all better off without revisiting."

Everybody in the room blanched at that last one. Duke nodded his head at their reactions. The ink really was hard to get off of clothes.

The screen went dark and she pulled the cord at the bottom, the projector screen rolling up. The blonde turned to them with a smug and satisfied expression on her face.

"In conclusion, despite there being no biological connection between them, and the fact that romantic and sexual preferences are not genetically inherited, Dick has managed to acquire Bruce's proclivity for an interesting dating life, which we all did if we're being honest. Its just that while Bruce dates across the law, Dick dates across realms and his romantic entanglements often happen to be so above our pay grade that its ridiculous. Data has shown that redheads cause the least amount of property damage so whenever he dates non-redheads, we have to keep an eye on the tea-I mean an eye on the situation."

She sat back in her chair with a satisfied air. "Questions?"

"Yes", Tim said miserably. "Did you have to bring Bruce into this? Like ew."

"I had to, yeah!", Steph replied cheerily. "You stole my croissant alienfucker!"

"Excuse you the alien fucks me thank you very much!"

Jason almost gagged. "TMI Timbo TMI!"

Duke frantically gestured at Damian. "Damian's right here!"

The boy in question just looked supremely unimpressed. "I was raised by assassins Thomas."

"Where's Cass?", asked Steph, munching on a packet of chips she produced from somewhere.

"Left this clown fest to assist Pennyworth in drugging father so that he can actually rest."

"Ah", said the whole room. Each one individually resolving to go to Bruce's room and get blackmail pics later. Sibling solidarity at its finest.

"Back to the matter at hand", said Tim, "Dick dating a possibly dangerous entity even remotely around the time frame when the Joker turned up dead is a red flag. And that's why our secret society is meeting today."

"Okay one, you think Dick's new boyfriend offed Joker? Two, this is a secret society?", asked Duke, his earlier confusion now fully evolving into resignation.

"I already filled out your documentation."

"What?"

"Don't worry. Everything's in order."

"Thats not...you know what? Thanks Tim."

"You're welcome!"

Steph chortled at the entire exchange and almost choked on her chips. Karma.

Jason leaned back with his hands behind his head.

"You know, if this guy merked the clown, and has no evil plans or something...I'm all for him actually. Guy has my vote. If they get married I might even decide not to embarrass Dickie at the wedding", he said while Steph hacked up a lung in the background.

"Be that as it may Todd, we still need to monitor the situation. If this Daniel did have anything to do with the Joker's death, then he is a dangerous individual who could pose a threat to Grayson", remarked the young Robin, and then as an add-on, "...and Gotham."

Duke sighed. There really was no escaping this was there? "So what do we have on the guy?", he asked Tim.

"Page 4. Name-Daniel Nightingale, prefers to be called Dan. Father, Vladimir Masters. Mother, Daniella Nightingale. Sister, Danielle Nightingale. Brother and sister are apparently vacationing-

"In Gotham?!, Duke asked horrified.

-and Dan met Dick during a Halloween Party in Bludhaven-

"In Bludhaven?!", Steph asked appalled.

"Why was a supposedly vacationing wealthy European in Bludhaven for Halloween?", Jason asked with a frown.

"European?!", Damian asked scandalized.

-And they hit it right off. As of now, they have been dating for five months and the relationship looks to be going strong. While the records seem legitimate, something's off about them. Also the Joker turned up dead on Valentine's Day. So my verdict...sus."

There was a bout of thoughtful silence.

Then.

"Daniella, Daniel, and Danielle? What the fuck? What are they? Clones?" asked an incredulous Jason, aghast at the unoriginality.

Duke scrutinized the provided photos closely. "Whoa, this Master's guy's genes really stood no chance! They all really could be clones for real."

Steph whistled. "He ripped!"

They stared at her. She sipped her boba unrepentantly.

"What? I'm right! He ripped!"

She was indeed right. He was ripped.

Duke put the file down. "So what's the plan? Do we just follow him around till we find out what he is or something?"

"Okay so the next week Gotham's got a week long 'Joker is Dead' carnival planned-

"Another one?", Damian asked surprised.

"We deserve it", both Jason and Steph reply vehemently.

-and Dick said Dan's taking him to the fair every single day of the celebration. If everything goes according to plan, we can sneak our way into the organizers, stall owners, ride operators whatnot and do some tests to figure Daniel Nightingale out. And if he's normal trouble we prepare for the breakup meltdown. If he's a different sort of trouble we deal with it."

"We gotta be careful though". Steph obnoxiously slurped her boba. "Or else Dick will deal with us."

They all shuddered in fear. Dick Grayson could be a mean bitch when it came to revenge.

"We'll just have to execute it well. Thomas will be adequate for the job. The rest of you fools will just have to step up, especially you Drake", Damian said as he crossed his arms across his chest, nose up imperiously.

The two robins, red and regular, sneered at each other.

Jason 'hmpfed'. "Sounds good enough. If that's it I'm gonna go. I got shit to do". He stood up from his chair and stretched, a symphony of cracking sounds coming from his spine. "Shit I'm old."

"You're just gonna re-watch Pride and Prejudice 2005 again". Tim also stood up, even more concerning popping sounds coming from his spine.

"Damn right I am", said the crime lord as he ambled out of the room.

Steph also got out of her chair and started collecting her trash, Alfred would kill he if she didn't. "I'm all in on this plan Timtam! Clown's dead, Gotham's finally calmed down, I went to bed early...No way I'm letting some ripped Adonis mess with my peace and quiet no matter how mouthwateringly swole he is! And he is swole!" With that she also swept out of the room.

"I'll update Cass!", she shouted from the corridor.

Damian had already disappeared. This left Tim and Duke alone in the room. When Tim also made to leave, Duke finally managed to break through the disbelieving fugue this entire meeting had pulled him under.

"So where's the plan Tim?"

"Oh", said the sleep deprived vigilante, already halfway out the door, "I emailed it you already."

And then there was one.

Duke just stood there processing that last sentence for a long two minutes. He sighed.

"So this meeting could've been an email."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dick is rather adventurous in his dating life. Helen of Troy vibes.

The entire operation reveals nothing suspicious. According to all the tests known to man and bat kind, Daniel 'I prefer Dan' Nightingale is a completely normal member of the Homo sapiens species. Not even a metagene. Just generously swole.

Duke being half immortal doesn't really get his siblings' reservations against some of Dick's exes. He doesn't realize that beings like Umh'uidrritl, who was not Cthulhu's cousin but a distant relative by the way, give most people incomprehensible nightmares. He on the other hand thought that Umh'uidrritl and his pet colossal hydrothermal squid were perfectly lovely. Though he and Damian high-key root for their Yautja friend.

There is absolutely no romantic relationship between Vlad and Danny. Dan and Danielle are just little shits who just love the horrified expression that overtakes Danny's face every time he sees their IDs for vacation time. To be clear its the Vlad part that horrifies him, he rocks as Daniella. Vlad, who is reformed here, is also horrified at this. Which is why the two little shits do it. Also the DP characters are all aged up. Could be by a few years, could be by millennia. They haven't deigned to reveal that to me.

Bruce spend the entire week under Alfred's careful supervision, getting rest and relaxation. He had spa days with Clark and Diana. He slept ten hours. He felt energetic in the morning. He hummed a cheerful tune. It was disgusting. He remained blissfully unaware of his eldest son's latest romantic adventure. Good for him.

Alfred thinks Ga-va'se was a splendid young man and that Umh'uidrritl was a lovely partner. He just wishes Master Dick would stop dragging in ruffians like that ill-mannered Heira every now and then. Truly a son of Master Bruce that one. What about that wonderful demon boy from a few years ago Master Dick? Mezarel was it? Oh he was sealed away, was he? Well bat your eyelashes at that man Constantine you and Master Bruce keep around and try to get that boy back will you? Such a well mannered young devil he was!

Alfred becomes that mother-in-law that never truly accepts Dan completely, still holding out hope for Mezarel to make a comeback. I've heard harems are wonderful this time of year Master Dick. A second husband would do you some good!

Dan finds this hilarious. His family does as well. Alfred also likes Dan. They have a weird understanding.

Cass likes most of Dick's exes. Except for Heira. Everybody hates Heira. Although Duke kinda likes him but even sunshine boy has his limits.

Yes the bat-siblings are doing this only for the safety of Gotham, not to also low-key annoy their big brother at all.

Yes Dan and Dick were aware of the hi-jinks.

Yes Cass did think they should just ask Dick.

Yes Dick is aware of who and what Dan is. He met him at a supernatural Samhain gala he literally stumbled into. He just rolled with it, celebrating the end of the harvest with the decidedly non-human revelers, and not only ate the food there but also drunk flirt with Dan.

Dan said, 'You're stupid. I like that in a human' and saved him from being stolen away by some very interested entities. It was the start of a beautiful relationship. Dani sometimes calls them the 'tits and ass duo' and she's right.

Danny is just happy that Dan found someone he loves and could keep up with him. He almost felt like a proud mother at their wedding and then had an existential crisis about it.

The family does find out Dan's real identity. It was after Dick accepted his proposal and it was hilarious. Jason meets Jazz at the wedding. He thinks he got infected with Dick's redhead fetish.

Yes this is all for my Dick/Dan propaganda. I hope you're not immune.

[nightblackowlbat]

Single parents Jazz and Bruce

Inspired by this post

[nightingale-prompts]

Dan:(looking at Red Hood) I can make him worse.

Danny: (looking at Red Robin) I don't wanna fix him. I like that he's fucked up and I wanna see how far he goes.

Jazz:(looking at Nightwing) As a friend, I can give him tools to fix himself.

Dani:(Looking at Robin) I have no idea what I'm doing but he's growling now.

[dcxdpdabbles]

Danny: Wow, when Jazz told me she knew a guy that could tutor me in English, she didn't mention you be so buff.

Jason: Is that a problem?

Danny flustered: No no no! I guess I was expecting someone as scrawny as me. I've never been good at working out.

Jason: Hmm, well, if you want, I can also help you work out. I'm at the gym before I come to our tutoring sessions anyway.

Danny faintly: Okay.

Jason: Great. I go to the campus gym so we can meet there. Anyway, Jazz said you needed help with Shakespearian chapters?

Danny even more faint: Shakespeare....uses English I don't understand.

Jason moving closer: I'm sorry I didn't catch that.

Danny whispering: Help me, I'm too gay.

Jason: What?

Danny panicked: I said help me I'm too slay!

Jason: Ugh, I guess your outfit is nice, but what's that got to do with Shakespeare?

Jazz spying from a near by table: This idiot is blowing it.

Dick from another nearby table also spying: I know the feeling. I set Jay up for the perfect opportunity to charm his crush, and he's focusing on Shakespeare!

[all-my-ocs-are-evil]

Jason's been pestering Danny about why he looks like a borderline walking corpse for ages and Danny has decided to put his lying skills to the test. (he has none)

rambling below cut

I've been playing w the idea that the more Danny transforms, the more his ghost form gets "lively" while his human form gets weaker and more sickly. He knows that if he keeps transforming like this then, one day, he's not going to have a livable body to go back to, but he really doesn't want to think about all that. He's more interested in the weird "totally dead but not dead" Wayne son who may or may not have a thing for his sister.

everytime i do one these im like "this time I'll keep it simple so I don't have to suffer through colouring bc I have zero foresight—it'll be greyscale at most" and then all of the sudden its 4am and i'm trying to finish a stupid comic but i decided to add "some" colour to spice it up and hide my shitty ink job and then SOME COLOUR ALWAYS BECOMES FULL COLOUR WHY CAN I NOT ESCAPE THIS STUPID CYCLE!!

(did this all stem from me not being able to decide between a super pale character design and one w a vibrant tan bc I love white hair + tan but I also love extremely pale albino so I forced myself to find a way to make both work? never! that's absurd!)

[demonic0angel]

Worthwhile (click for clarity)

I think a lot of people are already aware, but I LOVE it when I make Jazz tall, long, and creepy. Something about the thought of her being like a model, beautiful and tall, but when people look at her for too long and go, ‘wait a minute, is a real person supposed to look like that…?’ is really delightful to me XD

I actually made this a while ago, but I could never find an opportunity to post it…

Image description:

Panel 1 has an image of Jason and Jazz standing together. However, instead of looking normal, Jazz is faceless, scribbled over with black and looks very elongated and unnatural. She leans over a brightly smiling Jason like a monster. Jason has his arm on around her waist, while a clawed, withered hand rests on his shoulder, presumably Jazz’s.

Damian narrates: My brother recently got a girlfriend.

Panel 2 has an image of Damian’s terrified face. He looks extremely unsettled and frightened. He continues narrating throughout the entire comic.

D: I think she’s the most terrifying thing I’ve seen.

Panel 3 has him standing in the background as a little chibi, shocked as Stephanie and Tim approach Jazz without any hesitation, seemingly accepting her “horrifying” visage. Jazz’s face cannot be seen, only her long red hair.

D: Though no one else seems to notice but me.

Panel 4 has an image of Damian flinching backwards as Jazz’s clawed hand reaches for him. He looks terrified of her. Jazz’s body cannot be seen, only the hand.

D: But even if she’s horrifying

Panel 5 has Damian ducking downwards, closing his eyes, as Jazz’s hand finally reaches him, patting his head. Her hand is surprisingly not scary-looking, but instead, human.

Panel 6 has Damian looking shocked and confused, reaching up to touch his head as a little chibi in the background as Jazz slides out of view, nothing being seen but her red hair, as she leaves.

D: *continuing the narration from panel 3* She has never hurt any of us.

Panel 7 has an image of Jazz’s back again, her skin still being scribbled over and with only her long red hair being shown. She looms over Jason, who’s beaming up at her, supposedly completely oblivious to her terrifying looks.

D: So if you chose someone like her, ahki…

Panel 8 has Jason and Jazz together again, noses touching as they smile at each other, completely wrapped up in one another. There is finally a glimpse of Jazz’s face and she looks normal, smiling happily as Jason beams at her. She is also of a more normal height, although still taller than Jason.

D: Then surely, there is something worthwhile about her….?