#james makes a good point tho

[daddiesdrarryy]

James: I’m so laid back, I only care about 3 things in the world

James: My friends and family

James: Every person on this earth and their opinion of me

James: The crushing psychological weight of being alive

James: Oh, and Reg. I fucking love Reggie!

Remus: That’s more than three, Prongs

[mariocki]

Lalla Ward makes a brief appearance as Lady Augusta, intended bride to an ill-fated aristocrat, in A Ghost Story for Christmas: The Ash Tree (BBC, 1975)

[padfootastic]

This is so Sirius Black coded, I’m now choosing to make this a headcanon I have for him.

yoooo are u trying to get me beat up by a certain crowd 💀

(but like also—hard agree. it gives u so much more to play with if u picture him like that. all those things u love in villains except it’s sirius)

[ellecdc]

This is my first ever time requesting and i feel a tad nervous about it. Since i don’t know how the whole thing works.

Okay so i've seen in your previous posts that you said you don't write for barty jr as a central character but imma request anyways and maybe just maybe i'm lucky and you do end up writing this request (no pressure tho sweetie)

Basically a Ravenclaw reader x reg x barty. Reader is a total sweetheart but also very witty, playful and sassy in a sweet way. and marauders are also involved in the fic. (Maybe reader is neighbors with James or maybe she's beasties with rem. I don't mind. you decide that.)

Your moonwater x reader one shot was so cute and i’m just craving more of your writing.

Anyways thank you and also if you don’t want to write for barty just replace him with another character or just ignore this whole request. 💗

🤨🤨🤨🤨 I wanted to say no on account of I really don't know that I want to write for Barty BUT....you're just too cute and I love you too much and I didn't want to say no to you on your first request [which: thanks so much for bestowing me with such an honour]. 🤨🤨🤨🤨 cheeky little minx, I bet you did that on purpose 😉

So I present to you, for possibly the only time ever on ellecdc.... poly!bartylus x Ravenclaw!reader

CW: Barty jokes (?) about wanting to kill people - very on brand for him

“Reggiiieeeee.” Barty whined as he walked into their shared dorm room where Regulus had been reading due to the fact that Barty had taken up residence in the Slytherin common room, making reading nearly impossible.

Regulus stifled a sigh and offered a begrudging “yes, my love?” as Barty belly-flopped onto the bed and muttered something (unintelligible) miserably into the velvet quilts.

“I’m sorry, what was that?” Regulus asked, deciding to bookmark his place and give his boyfriend his undivided attention (anything less could end up being detrimental to both Regulus and Barty’s safety).

Barty lifted his head with a pout on his lips to look at Regulus. “How mad do you think Y/N would be if I killed Potter and his friends?”

Point proven. 

“I’m sorry,��what?” Regulus deadpanned, causing Barty to groan and roll onto his side.

“It’s just she’s always spending so much time with them and they’re all so annoying. And I don’t want to tell her to not hang out with them” (that was a lie; Regulus has heard Barty tell you that the Marauders were 'no good company to keep' well over hundreds of times) “so, I thought it’d just be better if they...disappeared, you know?”

“What have you done?” Regulus groaned darkly, causing Barty to chuckle.

“Nothing! Nothing...” yet. 

“You do realize that your hit list includes my brother, right?” Regulus asked.

Barty looked at him like he was sort of stupid. “Uhm...duh, it’s called hitting two bludgers with one beater-bat. Do keep up.”

“Barty, you are going to scare her away...” Regulus pressed. “...you’re kind of scaring me away.”

Barty’s groan nearly turned into a shriek as he threw himself back down onto the bed in defeat.

“Fine. But when we’re trying to enjoy a nice moment with Y/N and Potter and his cronies interrupt, it will be all your fault.” 

And with that Barty got up and stormed out of the dorm room. Regulus sighed in relief and pulled his book back out.

So, when the three of you were wandering around Hogsmeade (i.e., you and Regulus were walking hand-in-hand whilst Barty followed, balancing precariously on the stone walls of bridges as well as some fences lining various properties (much to the shop clerks and homeowners’ chagrin), pausing to pet every cat he could find and seeing how many times he could skip stones in the pond [the answer was none, he kept throwing them too hard]), Regulus got proven wrong (somehow), and (even more importantly) Barty got proven right when Sirius, James, Peter, and Remus showed up.

“Hey guys!” You called cheerily, and Regulus was almost ashamed to admit that your sweet smile and kind voice cancelled out any chagrin that the appearance of his brother caused him.

“Hello gorgeous! Baby bro.” Sirius called with a wink, causing Regulus to roll his eyes.

“Can I help you four!?” Barty nearly screeched as he showed up seemingly out of nowhere, all but standing directly in front of you like he was trying to shield you from the sight a particularly horrifying broom crash.

“Barty...” You chided jovially, gently nudging him aside. “They’re just saying hello.”

Sirius looked rather chuffed that you had defended them. Regulus didn’t like that one bit.

“Okay, well hello. You can leave now.” Barty shouted.

“Oh, lighten up, Junior.” Remus called with a smirk. “We’re all friends here.” 

Barty scoffed. “I’d rather shit in my hands and clap than be friends with Gryffindor’s.”

“Ew.” Everyone else said in response.

“Come on, my sweet, beautiful, angelic, lovely, smart, wonderful girl. I don’t want you or our beautiful day to be tainted by such scoundrels.” He cooed at you like you were some toddler on the verge of tears from having dropped your ice cream on the ground.

You groaned a little bit but acquiesced, allowing Barty to turn your body in the opposite direction.

“Sorry guys. I’ll see you tomorrow for our study date!” You called over your shoulder, to which Barty quickly counteracted with a “no you won’t!”

“You know, love,” Regulus murmured into your ear, “you’d probably save him a little bit of grief if you at least didn’t call it a date.” 

“Perhaps. But look at him now.” You whispered back conspiratorially. “He’s holding my hand and talking a mile a minute about how much of his dad’s money he wants to spend on us at Tomes & Scroll’s.”

Regulus couldn’t help but smirk at that. 

A Ravenclaw may have been smart enough to come up with a plan like this, but only the influence of your two Slytherin boyfriends would have made you cunning enough to pull it off. 

AN: I don't know how I feel about this one bit

[froggerland]

Actually I’m 100% convinced James would’ve worn The Dress if the party wasn’t outside where it was still freezing (would’ve been really hard to make it look good with 155262 layers underneath)

His alternative outfit is also fascinating tho, I think it’s supposed to be the british empire personified which is…… mmh definitely a product of its time but also very fitting for his character. The point is tho: he could’ve cosplayed as anyone but chose a female character/concept with an insane amount of long ass skirts

Long story short James Fitzjames gnc/transfemme supremacy

[moonstruckme]

Hi! A lil Sirius request or u could do it with one of the other boys (Remus James) but what about if his gf May be has an old injury that always flares up? (I hurt my knee years ago and even tho it's ok now every once a while if I over use it then it still hurts) and just fluff about her being upset her body won't cooperate and him just icing it and doting on her

Thank you for requesting!

Sirius Black x fem!reader ♡ 623 words

“Try to get up one more time,” your boyfriend threatens, “and I swear to god I will sit on you.” 

“I just want the remote.” 

“And I’m getting it for you.” Sirius stretches towards the coffee table, keeping the ice pack held to your knee with his other hand. He grabs the remote that had been too far for you to get on your own, passing it to you with an exasperated look. “Relax, sweetness, you won’t miss your show.” 

“Thanks,” you huff, turning the TV on. Really, you just want the distraction. Your knee is still radiating a warm ache, your skin still prickling from the humiliation of having to admit it when Sirius had noticed your limp. 

“Don’t mention it,” he replies, voice quieter than usual. His touch is gentle as he adjusts the ice pack, careful not to press down too hard. You feel shitty for being snippy with him, and resolve not to speak until you can be trusted to do it nicely, in the way he deserves. 

It doesn’t work. Sirius is watching you, gaze shrewd and contemplative, fingers tapping a distracted rhythm on your ice pack. You keep your eyes obstinately on the TV, but it’s only a matter of time before he speaks up. 

“Penny for your thoughts, pretty girl?” 

You sigh, closing your eyes ashamedly. “I’m sorry.” 

Sirius tsks. “For acting pissy when you’re pissed? Don’t worry about it.” 

“I don’t have to be mean to you just because I’m pissed,” you say, tilting your head back on the couch cushions. “I just feel like I should be able to run a couple of blocks without crippling myself. It’s got nothing to do with you.” 

Sirius’ mouth pulls sympathetically. He brings his free hand to your hurting leg, rubbing up and down the back of your calf. “We did a lot of walking before, too,” he points out. “It was a big day.” 

“That’s just it.” Your mouth tastes bitter. “I’m not eighty years old, walking around shouldn’t be a big day for me.” 

“I know, baby,” he says softly. “I’m sorry, it’s shit. But when it’s cool out like this, and you’re putting a lot of pressure on your knee, you’ve just—you need to treat yourself a bit more gently.” You make a sour face, and Sirius squeezes your calf, lips slanting upward. “I know, you’re very rugged. You’re the picture of youthfulness and good health. But try looking after yourself the way I look after you, yeah? For my peace of mind.” 

He speaks with blasé lightness, but his words melt you like butter in the sun. You sigh heavily, feigning reluctance. “But you’re so good at it,” you complain. 

“It’s hard work, yeah.” Sirius’ canines peek out as he grins. “Don’t worry, I’ll train you up. You’d really be helping me out, taking a load off. And it’d free me up to do more things like this.” 

He keeps his eyes on yours as he leans down, dark lashes fluttering prettily close to his brow. Your cheeks heat. Sirius moves the ice pack momentarily, pressing a featherlight kiss to the skin just below your knee. 

“There,” he says decisively, putting the ice pack back in place. “It’ll be better by tomorrow now, guaranteed.” 

You bite down on your lip to keep a smile at bay. “I didn’t realize how much you’d be able to accomplish if we shared the responsibilities.” 

“Yes, well, I know I make it look easy, but it is a lot,” Sirius tells you with faux solemnity. “Is there anywhere else I should see to?” He makes a show of looking you over. “Tsk, that lip looks to be hurting, too. C’mere, gorgeous, let me take care of that.”

[meear]

Are we finally going to talk about how POC James Potter does NOT make sense... I'm so glad someone finally said it because some of you guys are delusional. They want to turn him into their uwu cool boy so much they forgot to read the books

James was a rich privileged bullying jock in the 70s what the fuck makes you think he would not be white.

I have............ opinions on the new Harry Potter show, specifically the diversifying of the cast

Maybe this is me being overprotective as a poc myself but I really don't want to see white hp character become poc. Mainly because their whiteness is such an integral part of their characterisation.

I don't want to see a Black Hermione because her performative activism is very white savior. She canonically disregards the people she is protesting for and she just is privileged and acts like it. Like in 'Falcon and the Winter Soldier' Sam is a lot more careful around the law than Bucky, because well Black people tend to face harsher sentences. Hermione is canonically reckless now it would be different if this was just a flaw she grew out of but no this is a part of her personality. And one time commenting on how she'd rather be killed then expelled does not change the statement. Also Hermione has never canonically discrimination, besides some cheap remarks, she has not faced any real discrimination I mean she is regarded as one of the brightest witch of her time and heck she was lended the f*cking Time Turner for classes.

Also another discussion I have seen on the internet is a Arabic Harry and honestly I have no problems with he is great I love him. My problem is with his parents Lily is a green-eyed ginger she is undoubtedly white which leaves James f*cking Potter. Let me start this of by saying I hate James, his entire character is just of a rich, privileged, white boy who got away with all the harm he did, I barely even like Snape but James Potter just disgusts me. He canonically just approached another student, disarmed him and humiliated them in front of a mob by stripping him. He is nothing more then a bully. His privilege is what kept him safe, he should have been suspended but no if you as administrator are going to protect one student over the, protect the privileged perpetrator

[minzart]

Blazing eyes

Maleficent x Reader(GN) x Hades . ROR-VKs & You

“professor-” he slams the door close, leaving you alone… you naturally louch yourself to the door and try to pry it open, sadly it won't budge “cursed old fucking man -OPEN! ABRACADABRA! PRESTO! BIBIDBOBIDIBO! COMONNNNNN BITCH-”

“poor thing has lost it” Hook whispers.

“we haven't tried bitch as a pass wold tho” Morgie added in “didn't work, but it would have been so funny if it did”

“OPEN SESSAME!”

“alright alright alright” Uliana gets up from her seat “calm down, we don't bite”

“much” Hades adds and seconds later Maleficent hits his head firmly.

Or... how you got recruited as a new VK and the drama that comes with being friends (and for some more) of the young villains

In a world of princesses, princes, knights, evil fairies and gods you were neither, perhaps one could say you were even less, a commoner, a plebeian with the most average sprinkle of magic yet to set foot in Merlin Academy again. Never a stand out and when your voice was heard it was almost as if the room could swallow it whole for how little it mattered in the grand scheme of things.

What would you be when you graduated? A tug? A squire? Perhaps if lucky an advisor or even a right hand confidant of a big name hero or villain. Maybe just a normal baker, who's to say, after all, the unremarkable have their own gift, destiny, profecies and duty wasn't yours to claim after all, so your life is yours and yours alone to mold, change, waste, thrive and live.

But oh that doesn't mean you can't impact lives, no, rather the opposite, you can be the last straw or the first domino that will never see the finish line but will be remembered as fondly and bitterly as the eyes that saw you last.

And our story starts not by your eyes, but by hers, a young fary sits bored out of her mind in a perfect, dreadful, evening at detention with the fools she calls… allies…. Yes, that felt… correct enough, and with the infant God she could only denominated as a passing interest at best, a boyfriend at worst.

Morgie, being the little snake that he is, can't keep still and out of the woods for long before he starts budging the magical reinforced windows, she won't blame him, after all she herself did the same thing some months ago and now the windows have a reflective spell to “keep students safe”, as if they didn't threw out weaklings out of those even before her… “sneeze incident”, as if she could even make mistakes, that was a purposeful fire breaking breath right into the window's direction and not because Uliana's cologne was too strong that day, absolutely preposterous of principal Merlin to spread that ridiculous rumor about her, she had to curse twice the students to shut their giggles that week all because of that pompous old man.

James had given up cheering for Morgie and now laid back, boots staining the desk shining his golden rook and by his pout being extremely disappointed in his eyeliner not being as sharp as it was 20 minutes ago.

“Uliana~” he called, a melodic tune echoing in the almost empty classroom “dear, scariest witch of the sea, seafoam of my dreams”

“call me that one more time and I'll give your other hand to tictoc as a gift asshole” the leader of this little band of mischief smirked, pointing her little switchblade at him, she sat at the teacher's desk, marking one more tally to their monthly visit and, before being interrupted, curiously checking to see if new marks were made by new potential allies “what do you want?”

“do you have that miraculous eyeliner in you again? I think I missed a spot” the young sea witch rolls her eyes in amusement and one single tentacle leaves her back, the black tube almost reaching Hook's good hand, then it doubled back and threw it in his bad hand's direction, the boy caugh it without much fuss and dangled it in her direction, wiggling his eyebrows in victory.

“much thanks beauty”

“your parents should have named you Narcissus”

“and you should try being a pitcher to this years baseball team”

“you would be too good for them tho” the young God spoke from behind the black fary, playfully passing the same blue flame around his fingers “I saw Jame's fumble a bit this time”

“I didn't fumble anything!”

“yes you did”

“did not”

“did too”

“did-”

The door of the class is slammed open by what Maleficent can smell is the dire's magic, his voice getting closer and closer, Uliana decides to move to the closest chair, not interested in prolonging the tedious lesson with an extra 15 minutes of more lecture.

“I'm again so thankful you could come dear” Merlin's voice echoed inside “it's so hard to find generous students like yourself, always ready to help the ones with the most difficulty”

All teens roll their eyes and look at each other's direction just to confirm that they weren't just hallucinating the most basic and fakest sweet talk to ever exist, and by all means they did experience each “baby's first manipulation” attempt, and they were not as fake sounding as his.

“you are too kind professor” the nervous little laugh gave away whoever they were wasn't as ingenious as half this school seemed to be ”I did say i wanted to try everything once at least in my years resolution papers, and I mean it”

“such admirable dedication to academics I sure hope you pass a little bit of that for this… study… group” the hesitation in Marlin's voice made Morgie snort and fall to the ground, wich made Hook tremble and poke his own eye, which prompted him to swing his hook in ager back, ready to curse the son of Morgana, but his hook went flying off its place hitting Hades’ foot, making the God scream in pain, losing control of the little flame that hit the teacher's desk making if catch fire so bright it flames so wild that a stray one reaches Uliana's pants.

It is in that moment that you and professor Merlin walk in the class, the VKs growling and cursing at each other in the middle of chaos. The professor calmly puts the fire out, as does Uliana, Hook grabs his hook back, Morgie scrambles to go back to his seat, Hades takes a deep breath, hair turning back to it's blue hue and Maleficent holds the biggest ugly laugh she can fell boiling from the deeps of her core.

Your eyes travel slowly through the most infamous trouble makers of this school, from Uliana's defiance, to Hook's flirtatious, Morgie's mischievous, Hades’ unimpressed and Maleficent's cold stare. Taking a deep breath and clenching your bag you turn 180 degrees and start marching out of class, professor Merlin was not so happy with your attitude since he decided to grab your shoulders firmly and smoothly turn you back around.

“today class, a very generous classmate offered to help me supervise you all” Merlin smiles “which is just so great because I'm need for a very important meeting and am already-”

And in that moment you made the biggest mistake you could have made that day, you defied the authority figure right in front of the punks wannabes of Merlin Academy “absolutely not” you dance around his grasp and just didn't bolt out right in that instance because the old man was blocking your path.

“now now” your name falls from his lips as if he's talking to a child “I know you have the good it takes to help those unfortunate individuals”

“I don't have shit!” you could feel all eyes turning to you, the class has your attention.

“language child!”

“I could teach math and potions and curses and counter curses to anyone, but being responsible for a whole class that will harass me to death if I don't let them out was not in our agreement sir“ you try to dance around the sorcerer again.

“watch your tone, those are very heavy accusations”

“yes we would never do something like that” Uliana puts more log to this blazing circus as Morgie tries to hide better the straw and paper balls he just finished doing in broad daylight for all to see.

Merlin cleans his throat, bringing attention back to him as he side eyes the girl “as I was saying, it will only be for some minutes! I'll be back as soon as possible” the headmaster starts to get out of the door still facing the class “I'm sure you can handle them”

“professor-” he slams the door close, leaving you alone… you naturally louch yourself to the door and try to pry it open, sadly it won't budge “cursed old fucking man -OPEN! ABRACADABRA! PRESTO! BIBIDBOBIDIBO! COMONNNNNN BITCH-”

“poor thing has lost it” Hook whispers.

“we haven't tried bitch as a pass wold tho” Morgie added in “didn't work, but it would have been so funny if it did”

“OPEN SESSAME!”

“alright alright alright” Uliana gets up from her seat “calm down, we don't bite”

“much” Hades adds and seconds later Maleficent hits his head firmly.

“we can be civil see” she shows her gang, all… sitting in various degrees of proper but sitting still nonetheless “now what's you name? I didn't catch it seeing some so…”

She looks you up and down, judging from you clothes to your hair to your posture, her month forms a thin line as she thinks in how to describe you ”comum, sticking it to that old man was kinda impressive”

You rest your head in the door, a defeated sigh leaves your lips with your name in it, Uliana tests it a few times and sits in the closest table “you don't happen to have famous parents do you?”

“take a guess” you mumble, choosing to sit down and accept your fate.

“that explains why I don't remember seeing you around here”

“we are in the same classes…”

“I skip those, anyways, so the headmaster is in a meeting? Do you know what class it’s happening in? ”

“why would I know?”

“You two just seemed so close y'know” You roll your eyes, a headache already forming inside your head.

“he got my name wrong but sure whatever makes my life easier, did any of you try breaking the windows?”

“Morgie dear was just about to start biting them” an offended “hey” can be heard in the background as the boy momentarily stops gossiping with his friend.

“do you know if it's a spell? A charm? A ward? We need to get going and I think you would be happy with us gonne too”

“it could be a potion for all that i know”

“you are quite useless aren't you?” her eyes lock with yours, daring you to fight back… you double down.

“you have no idea” you raise your chin and summon your biggest smile “a snail is more useful than I!”

You immediately let your facade down, head resting between your closed arms “just leave me be and continue doing whatever it is that you do”

The girl grins in amusement “aren't you spunky, color me impressed” she gets out of your table and lowers herself to your eye level “I see some potential, we could be friends, what do you say?”

“...” for a moment, the young sea witch thinks “hook, line, and sinker” but her expectations are shattered as you point behind her and says “your rescue has arrived”

Turning around she sees her little group of misfits, the ones that were still out there one stacked on top of the other, curse book in hand, they wave excitedly to her and signal for all to move out of the way.

Hades immediately gets up pulling Maleficent with him, and a blast breaks the glass “it wasn't supposed to shatter it!” The caster panics, making their little tower lose balance and fall, hopefully they weren't hurt too badly.

Uliana sighs annoyed, but moves to the window anyway “out we go then! Don't think I forgot about you, I'll be keeping a close eye, and if you change your mind, you can find us it's not that hard” she looks at you as her four tentacles graciously take her down and out of detention.

Hook winks at your direction and jumps out “pleasure meeting you sweet, sorry we couldn't talk longer schemes to make, pranks to pull you know the drill”

“bye!” Morgie waves at you as he also jumps out.

Hades moves to leave, a half wave at your direction as he waits for the horned fae take his hand, Maleficent looks at you up and down, he eyes lock with yours, they glow a neon green and you feel as there are eyes everywhere “see you around”

At least it's only you, the shattered window and deep feeling of dread creeping in your back.

[once-upon-an-imagine]

Lover - Sirius Black

A/N: ahh! well here it is, a very long one-shot. I'm not sure how, this started off kind of sweet, then it got angsty and then it got funny but I still hope you like it!

Request - Anonymous asked: Hey love! Hope you're doing okay! I wanna start off by saying I love all of your Sirius Black fics so much! They're so fun to read and always make me happy! Secondly I love the whole Potter!reader thing cause I absolutely love James and have always wanted a brother like him. Idk if you're taking requests but if you are I was wondering if you'd do a Sirius x reader where the reader is a Hufflepuff and is the opposite of Sirius and he's like absolutely whipped but the reader is James' little sister ( a year younger maybe cause I love age gaps lol) so yeah sirius is like shitting scared cause he thinks James would hate him forever and all angsty but then James is like dude I knew since like the day I introduced you guys and all happy ending lol. Sorry if it's too detailed. I completely understand if you don't wanna write it tho. Have a nice day!

Warnings: mentions of Sirius' family situation, like I said it got a bit too angsty for a moment there but I think that's it let me know if I missed anything though!

Disclaimer: I don’t own Harry Potter :D gif isn’t mine :)  

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

Lover

My heart's been borrowed and yours has been blue All's well that ends well to end up with you Swear to be overdramatic and true to my lover

You kept walking back and forth in your room. You couldn't sleep. You hadn't been able to sleep earlier tonight, but now it was even worse. When you walked into the kitchen to make yourself a cup of tea you did not expect to find Sirius Black, barely being able to stand as he held on to the kitchen counter. You felt your entire body shaking when you noticed the bruises and blood all over him. But, when he looked at you, your heart broke into a million pieces, that's when you felt like you were going to be sick. He was crying and he looked haunted. You had never seen Sirius like this. He tried to say your name before he collapsed so you quickly walked over to him to hold him up and you yelled for your brother. It wasn't even five minutes before James came running downstairs with your parents following him. And now, here you were, waiting for James to come tell you what happened. Sirius wasn't talking, so if there was a remote possibility that he would, it would be with James. And your parents were helping him so, at some point, you were asked to leave. But James knew you wouldn't go to sleep until you knew Sirius was okay.

"Hey, bug" you turned around when James opened your door.

"Hi" you said, finally sitting on the bench by your window and James joined you. "H-how is he?" you asked nervously. You could tell James had been crying as well.

"He's gonna be okay" he assured you. "I knew you wouldn't go to sleep until I told you that" he smiled. "He's gonna be staying with us now" he explained.

"Good" you nodded. "I'm glad he doesn't have to go back there" you said. You knew about Sirius' home situation. He had talked to you about it a few times, but you had never imagined it was this bad.

"Me too" James smiled at you.

"How are you feeling?"

"I'm fine, bug" he frowned.

"You know it's okay if you're not, right?" you insisted.

"It's just... hard seeing him like this" he admitted, shedding a few tears. You wrapped your arms around his shoulders and kissed his cheek.

"You're a good brother, Jamie" you said as you felt him hug you back. "That's why he came here" you told him.

"Thanks, bug" he said, kissing the side of your head. You were about to pull away but you felt James arms tightening a little and you knew he needed more time.

"You should try to get some sleep" you told him.

"You too" he said, getting up. When he was at the door, he looked back at you with a weary smile. "I love you, bug."

"I love you too, Jamie" you smiled before he left, closing the door behind you.

You sighed, thinking that it was best if you also got some sleep since it was almost three in the morning, but you heard something in the room next to you. You knew Sirius would most likely not be able to sleep. So, you went downstairs again to make some tea. But not for you. You knew that Sirius might not want to talk right now, especially with you. So, you just wanted to do something nice and feel a little helpful. You walked quietly to his room and saw that the light was still on, so you were not waking him up. You knocked lightly but got no response, so you opened the room slowly. It was empty, and the bathroom door was closed. You didn't want to cross any lines so you placed the tea on his nightstand and left.

And that's how it started. You did the same thing the following night. This time, when you knocked on his door, Sirius opened it and smiled sweetly at you. He had a feeling it was you the previous night. He was still very quiet, which was unusual for him, but you still offered him the tea.

"I just... thought it might help you sleep" you smiled nervously.

"Thanks, Bambi" he said, grabbing it from you, making you chuckle a little. He had always called you that and, it annoyed you at first, but now you kind of liked it.

"Good night, Siri" you said, walking over to the next door.

"Night, love" he whispered to himself going inside his room.

This kept happening for the following weeks. You slowly saw Sirius coming back to his old self. Your mum had asked you to help redecorate his room so he would feel more at home and you noticed his eyes watering a little when your mum showed it to him. James told him that Remus and Peter would be arriving in a few weeks and that also seemed to lift his spirits up. But if Sirius was being honest with himself, his favorite part of living at the Potters was whenever you brought him tea. It was a small act of kindness on your part but it meant the world to him. He knew you sometimes had trouble sleeping and you were worried that he was experiencing that too, and that warmed his heart. Which is why, one night he opened the door before you could even knock. He stood there on the other side and smiled sweetly at you.

"Oh- s-sorry, I was um-"

"It's okay, love" he chuckled. "How come you never bring one for yourself?" he asked, confused as he grabbed the tea from you.

"Oh" you said, a little taken aback. "I usually drink mine downstairs" you explained.

"Well, would you maybe like to have your tea with me tomorrow?" he smiled sweetly at you.

"Really?" you asked, feeling a little nervous. "I m-mean, yeah, sure, I'd love that" you nodded.

"Cool, see you tomorrow, Bambi" he said, kissing your cheek before you both said good night.

And you did. Every night for the rest of the summer, after James went to sleep, and the rest of the Marauders, once they arrived, you brought tea for Sirius and the two of you spent hours talking. Little by little, you saw him going back to his old self. He smiled more. He laughed more. He didn't seem jumpy or gloomy anymore. One night, you fell asleep and he didn't have it in him to bring you to your room. He liked your company and he felt a lot better when you were around, so he didn't. But a few hours later, you were woken up by his screaming. It broke your heart to see him so terrified by his nightmares, but it got Sirius to open up to you. He felt more comfortable around you with each passing week, until one night, he finally kissed you.

You would have been lying if you said you didn't have a slight crush on Sirius Black. Because he was Sirius Black. Everyone had a crush on him and you were no exception. And in the weeks since he had moved in, you got to know him even more and you felt your crush growing. So, when he kissed you, you were over the moon. That's how it started. This whole thing between the two of you. You both decided to keep it secret for a while. And you couldn't deny that it was even exciting at first. The stolen glances between you, the way Sirius would always sit next to you at meals and hold your hand under the table. Brief moments where he would excuse himself from the other Marauders just to go to your room to steal a quick kiss from you.

But now, that you were back at Hogwarts, being in different years and houses, it made it increasingly difficult to keep your relationship a secret. You knew Sirius was anxious about James' reaction to your relationship, but you didn't think it would be such a big deal, as to practically have your relationship back to before you two got together. Making moments like this extremely rare.

"Merlin, I've missed you" Sirius smiled as the two of you laid on his bed, kissing, with music in the background.

"I've missed you too" you smiled before he pulled you in for another kiss. "It's been such a long week" you complained.

"It's only Tuesday" he laughed.

"I know" you pouted and he kissed you once more. "But we barely got to see each other this past weekend and classes have been crazy and I just-"

Sirius interrupted you with another kiss. "I know, love" he said, placing his hand on your cheek. "But it's a Hogsmeade weekend" he smiled. "Maybe we can go?"

"R-really?" you asked, feeling excited. Because of all the sneaking around, you two didn't even have a first date.

"Yeah, I think we're all gonna go, so you can come with us" he suggested, making your smile drop.

"Oh- um, y-yeah, sure" you smiled again, but, of course, Sirius noticed it was different.

"What?" he frowned, sitting up.

"N-nothing" you tried to assure him.

"Love, you're a terrible liar" he insisted. "I know when something's bothering you" he said pulling you with him.

"Nothing, I just..." you sighed. The two of you never really established what this was and you didn't want to make it a bigger deal than it was. "I'm not sure if I have a Potions exam on Monday" you covered up.

"Oh" he replied before smiling again. "Well, in that case" he said, leaning in for another kiss. "Maybe I can stay back and help you study" he smirked, kissing you again.

"You don't have to do that" you chuckled.

"Oh, I wouldn't mind, sweetheart" he said as his kisses started making his way down your neck. "I wouldn't mind at all" he said between kisses and making your smile appear again.

It was short-lived, however, because the two of you heard the door opening and Sirius quickly pushed you off him, making you fall off his bed.

"Bloody hell!"

"Sirius!" you complained when you hit your head with his nightstand.

"Moony! What the fuck!" Sirius said, looking at his friend standing at the entrance of his dorm.

"What? Just be glad it was me and not Prongs" he rolled his eyes, closing the door and tossing his bag on his bed.

"I'm so sorry, love" he said, getting up to help you. "Are you okay-?"

"No, of course I'm not okay" you glared at him. "You pushed me and I hit my head!"

"I'm sorry, love. I thought it was Prongs-"

"What difference does that make, Sirius" you asked, grabbing your shirt and putting it back on. "We're both half-naked, in your bed, do you honestly think James would have thought nothing was going on? I know he's daft but give him some credit!"

"I panicked, okay! Moony said he would be out until dinner" he said, glaring at Remus.

"It is almost dinner" he defended himself. "And this wouldn't have happened if you just told Prongs already. What is he gonna do? Kill you?"

"Moony, could you please get out?" Sirius glared at his friend again making Remus sigh in frustration.

"Fine, I'll leave-"

"No, don't worry, Remus. I'll leave" you said as you finished fixing yourself up.

"What? Why are you leaving?" Sirius said, pulling you to him.

"I don't know, Sirius, maybe because I don't want to stay here until my brother comes in and you push me again so I hit my head!"

"That was an accident! I just-"

"I know. You don't want James to know about us" you rolled your eyes. "What's the big deal? Remus knows!" you said, pointing at him.

"Remus is not your brother. Trust me, love. I will tell him, I promise I just... need more time" he begged, making you sigh in defeat.

"Fine" you said, grabbing your bag. "I'm still gonna go" you said, quietly.

"Love-"

"No, it's fine" you said with a weary smile. "If it's almost dinner time, that means Jamie's practice is over" you said. "I'll see you both later" you said, leaving and closing the door behind you before Sirius could stop you again.

"I fucked up, didn't I?" Sirius asked out loud.

"Oh, good. You didn't neet me to tell you" Remus smirked a little.

"Moony, I'm not joking-!"

"Neither am I, Pads" Remus said as Sirius put his shirt back on. "You're gonna fuck things up if you keep doing this. And the longer you wait-"

"I know, the worst it will be with Prongs" Sirius sighed frustrated.

"Prongs? You're more worried about what James will say than being disrespectful to your girlfriend?"

"Whoa, that's a big word, Moony" he chuckled nervously. "Bambi's not my-" he stopped as Remus glared at him. "I mean we haven't really-" he sighed. "Ugh, I'm fucking this up, aren't I?" he said, throwing himself on his bed.

"You know, sometimes you're more perceptive than I give you credit for" Remus replied.

"Moony!" Sirius complained, sitting up. "It's not funny! I don't know what to do!"

"Why are you so afraid of telling James about the two of you?"

"Are you joking? You know I don't have the best reputation about dating and if he finds out that I'm dating his little sister he's going to kill me!"

"I honestly don't think he would" Remus tried to reason to him. "I mean, we've all seen how much you've changed this past year" he continued. "And James hasn't seen it but I've seen the way the two of you are together. It's different" he explained. "But you're going to fuck it all up if you keep making her feel this way" he said.

"What way?"

"As if you don't want to be seen with her. As if your relationship isn't serious. And as if you care more about what James says than hurting her feelings" he indicated.

Sirius opened his mouth to say something but nothing came out so he threw himself back on his bed. Maybe Remus was right. Maybe he needed to get this over with and just tell James before it was too late.

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

The next day, you were coming out of your Charms class and you were still in a foul mood. You loved Sirius, you knew that much. And whenever you were with him, you felt like he might love you too. But all of this hiding and sneaking around made your insecurities get the best of you and wonder if he was as Sirius about this as you were. You understood that he was nervous about telling James, but you kept insisting nothing would happen so, maybe it wasn't just that.

Your thoughts were shut down when you noticed a small crumpled parchment in your bag while you were putting your book away. You opened it and saw one of Sirius' doodles and it made you smile. He did this from time to time. He left little notes hidden in your books and your bag. This one was a small doodle of him holding up a flower and apologizing for being an idiot, asking you to meet him after lunch so the two of you could talk.

"Hey, bug!" you heard your brother walking your way and you put your small doodle back in your bag.

"Hi, Jamie" you smiled at your big brother.

"You going to lunch?"

"Yeah" you replied before you heard your name being called.

"Hey" you turned around to see your housemate and classmate speeding your way. "Oh, hi, James" she smiled. "It's the Potters" she greeted.

"Hi Emmeline" you smiled back at your friend.

"Hey" she smiled. "I won't keep you long, I just wanted to ask you something" she told you. "Oh, and now that your brother's here I guess I can ask him too" she told you.

"Sure, Em, what do you need?" you asked your friend.

"You're really close with Sirius Black, aren't you?" she asked, making your heart drop for a moment. You could tell where this was going.

"She's not as close to him as I am" James smirked. "Why the interest, love?"

"Well, I was just... wondering if... he's single?" she asked smiling as you felt your entire heart shatter. What were you supposed to say now?

"Yes, of course, he is" James answered before you could say something.

"Really? I wasn't sure because you seem really close to him and I didn't want to cross any lines if you two were dating or anything-" she said looking at you. But, again, your brother intervened.

"With her?" he laughed a little too loud to your liking. "Sirius dating my sister? You're joking right, they're just friends" he insisted.

"Oh, that's a relief" she sighed while you remained with your mouth open but nothing was coming out. "So, could you maybe... find out for me if he might be interested?"

"I- uh-" you tried to make sense of this whole thing. "Y-you want me to f-find out if Sirius likes you?"

"Yeah" she chuckled. "We've sort of been flirting back and forth, and since it's a Hogsmeade weekend, I though-"

"Y-you've been flirting back and forth" you said, letting out a bitter chuckle and feeling as if someone was stabbing your heart repeatedly. "With Sirius-?"

"Well, that's a grand idea, Emmeline" James kept interrupting. "Maybe we can have a double date" he suggested.

"What's on your mind, Potter?"

"Well, I happen to know you do some of your prefect rounds with Lily" he smirked. "Put in a good word for me and I put in a good word for you?"

"Really?" Emmeline asked, excitedly.

"Really" James nodded.

"Alright, Potter. You've got yourself a deal" she smiled. "But only if you agree to find out if I have a chance first" she said, turning back to you.

"I um-" you stuttered. "S-so, you want me to find out if Sirius likes you-?"

"Yes, please, will you? Is not too much trouble, is it?" she asked.

"Uh-"

"Of course, not, love!" James waved you off. "We'll definitely have the information in a few hours. I mean, we're just on our way to have lunch with Sirius, right bug?" he said, playfully hitting your stomach with his arm.

"R-right" you said trying your best not to start crying. Were you really just about to set your boyfriend up on a date just to avoid telling your brother?

"Brilliant! Thank you so much! I have my Prefect rounds tonight with Lily so, that works" she told James.

"Pleasure doing business with you, Em" James said as she nodded her head to him.

"Thanks, love" she told you. "I'll see you both later!" she said, walking away from you.

"Oh, Merlin! Bug, did you hear that?"

"What just happened?" you muttered to yourself.

"I'll tell you what just happened. I just got a date with Lily!" he said, excitedly, pulling you with him to the Great Hall.

"I didn't hear that" you said, frowning at him.

"Come on, let's go!" he said, running towards his usual spot. He found Remus and Peter already sitting there but Sirius was nowhere to be seen. "Great! You're both here! Where's Padfoot?"

"He said he'll be right here" Peter said as James pulled you to sit and he took the seat next to you.

"Brilliant!" he said as he started putting food on his plate and yours.

"Are you okay?" Remus asked you.

"She's fine. She's just hungry" James said, placing a massive mountain of potatoes on your plate.

"No, I think I have to go-"

"Nonsense!"

"Hey" Sirius said, appearing at the table and greeting all of you. "Bambi, I didn't know you would join us today" he said, sitting next to Remus, in front of you. "What are you all talking about?"

"Not much" James said, acting casually. "Just talking about next weekend" he said smiling. "Hogsmeade weekend" he continued. "Do you have any plans?"

"Uh, no, n-not really" Sirius answered, looking at you without meaning to.

"Wonderful" James said with a smirk. "I have a proposition for you" he told him.

"What?"

"Well, I was thinking-"

"Shocker" Remus heard you mutter under your breath and your brother quickly glared at you.

"What do you think about going on a double date?"

"Are you asking me out, Prongs? Because I've got to be honest with you, you're not really my type" Sirius asked him making the other two Marauders laugh.

James rolled his eyes and glared at his friends. "No, I just happened to run into Emmeline, you know her right?" he said.

"Um... sure?" Sirius said a bit confused. He looked at you to see if you could maybe provide some sort of explanation, but your eyes were glued to the potatoes on your plate. You didn't dare to look up at him.

"Well, you see, my sweet Padfoot, it looks like our dear Emmeline has a bit of a crush on you" he said happily.

You lifted her look just to see Sirius' reaction who looked back at you, feeling extremely guilty.

"N-no, she doesn't" he said awkwardly.

"Yes, she does! Isn't this grand?"

"G-grand? W-why would that be grand?" Sirius chuckled, nervously.

"Well because she just told us that she wants to go to Hogsmeade with you this weekend and that she would ask Lily so we could go on a double date" James said with a smirk.

"Us? What do you mean 'us'?"

"She just told us before coming over here" he explained, making Sirius' heart stop. "She wanted us to find out if you liked her back" he shrugged.

Sirius instantly looked at you. He knew you were upset. And you probably had every right to. This was it. He should just come out and say it. But he fucked up again. He was a coward.

"She told you that?"

You slowly turned to look up from your food when you felt the four boys looking at you. James still had his stupid smirk on his face, Peter was just curiously waiting for an answer, Sirius was looking at you as if he was going to cry, and Remus was looking at you almost... sorry?

"Um" you said nervously. "She might-have um, m-mentioned something" you said before looking back down.

"Mentioned something? She said you two have been flirting back and forth for weeks" James said excitedly. "So, what do you say? Why don't you ask her out and then the four of us could go on a double date?"

You felt your heart beating faster each second and feared it might explode. Not only would Sirius not take you out on a date this Saturday, but he might even go on a date with someone else. All to avoid telling your brother about the two of you.

"Uh, I don't think so, Prongs-"

"Come on, Pads, is just one date" James kept on pushing.

Remus turned to look at you, who didn't dare look up from your plate. He noticed the tears in your eyes and he turned to glare at Sirius, kicking him under the table.

"I don't really think Padfoot's interested, Prongs" he said, widening his eyes at Sirius. He couldn't believe he was so afraid of James as to even hurt your feelings in the process.

"Of course he is, he's interested in any girl" James laughed. "Well, almost, right bug?" he said, elbowing you playfully on your stomach.

"R-right" you muttered sadly.

You suddenly felt sick to your stomach and you decided you couldn't be here anymore, so you stood up.

"Hey, where are you going, bug?" your brother asked confused.

"Away from you" you answered, grabbing your stuff.

"But you haven't even touched your food" James said, worriedly, looking at the still full plate next to him.

"Well, maybe I'm not hungry anymore" you said grumpily, before walking away from them.

"What's going on with her?" James asked concerned, looking at his three friends.

"I don't know" Sirius quickly replied. "W-why would we know?"

"Yeah, why would we know?" Remus asked, glaring at Sirius.

"It's probably her time of the month" James said shrugging his shoulders. "Honestly is easier to deal with your time of the month, Moony, no offense" he said looking at Remus. "So, what do you say?"

"About what?" Sirius asked, confused.

"The double date!" James said frustrated.

"Uh, I um-" Sirius said awkwardly. "I don't think so, mate. I'm not really interested in Emmeline like that" he said getting up as well. "Um, I'm gonna go see if Bambi's okay" he said, walking out of the Great Hall before any of them could stop him.

"What do you think is going on with him?" James asked confused. "And why is he checking on my sister?"

"Beats me" Remus said casually. He wouldn't be the one to tell his best friend that their other best friend was in a secret relationship with his sister.

Sirius ran after you as quickly as he could. He quickly made his way to the Library, knowing you went there when you didn't want your brother to bother you and he walked over to the last aisle. He saw you sitting there with your knees pulled to your chest as tears fell down your face. It felt as if someone grabbed a hammer and broke his heart into millions of pieces.

"Love" he said, kneeling next to you. You quickly tried to wipe away the tears falling down your cheeks but new ones just came.

"W-what are you doing here?"

"Sweetheart" he said, pulling you towards him. "You know I don't want to go out with Emmeline, right?" he said, as you tried to breathe normally.

"I g-guess" you sighed.

"Look at me" he said, gently lifting your chin with his finger and he then wiped your tears softly with his thumb. "I don't want to go out with anyone who's not you" he said genuinely.

"Sirius..." you said, pushing yourself away from him.

"And I swear we have not been flirting back and forth! I wouldn't do that-!"

"Sirius" you said again, making him pay attention to you. "It's fine" you said, with your voice breaking a little.

"W-what?" Sirius frowned, confused.

"Look, it is clear that your relationship with me is not as important as your relationship with James" you cried a little more. "S-so, if you want to just- e-end whatever this is, I completely understand and-"

"What?!" he said, raising his voice a little. The two of you heard someone shushing you all the way on the other side and he looked back at you. "Sweetheart, I don't want to end things" he pleaded. "I-is that what you want? I swear I haven't flirted with anyone since I came back here and-"

"It's not what I want, Sirius" you insisted. "B-but... I just... I don't know what to do! I don't know what you want-"

"I want to be with you, love!" he insisted.

"Do you? I barely get to see you anymore. We're in different houses, we're in different years the rest of the time you're with my brother and you don't want him or anyone else to know about us! I don't know how long I can keep doing this, Sirius. It just doesn't feel as if you actually want to be with me!"

"I do!"

"Then why can't we just tell James so he can stop setting you up with a different girl every week!" you blurted out. "You think he doesn't tell me things? That he hasn't told me how he noticed you've changed and you don't talk to girls anymore so he keeps trying to set you up with them!"

"Well, of course, I've changed! I'm with you now and I don't want to be with anyone else!"

"But he doesn't know that, Sirius! So he's most likely going to keep doing this until you get fed up and tell him! So, why not just tell him already? Do you not want people to know about us-?"

"No! That's not it!"

"Is it me? Are you embarrassed to be seen with me or something?"

"What? No! Love, how can you think that!?"

"I don't know what else to think Sirius! I don't even know what we are!"

"Please don't ever think that" he said with a stern look on his face. "Look, I know I fucked up yesterday, and today, and probably lots of other times. I've never done this before and I-" he sighed, running a hand through his hair frustrated. "I love you" he said, making your heart flutter instantly.

"Y-you what?"

"I love you, sweetheart, okay? I know that. I've known it for a while. I have never felt like this about anyone and... I don't want to lose you" he said with his voice breaking a little. "I know I've fucked up, I just..." he sighed again. "I don't want you to think that my relationship with James is more important than you. Nothing to me is more important than you, okay? But... love..." he said, looking away. "I got disowned" he said, quietly. "I was kicked out of my family and James..." he continued. "Without him, I wouldn't have anywhere to go. I wouldn't even have you" he explained. "And he's my best friend and he knows me more than anyone. You also know that I don't have the best dating reputation here and... I'm just... scared that he's going to hate me and... then I'll have no one" he said. "I know this isn't fair to you, this is all just... a lot and new to me, and I'm so sorry-"

"Sirius" you said, cupping his cheek with your hand and smiling at him. You pulled him gently and kissed his cheek. "First of all, I love you too" you said, making him smile back at you.

"Y-you do?"

"Of course, I do. Why do you think I was so upset about you going out with another girl this weekend-?"

"That was never going to happen-" he interrupted.

"Secondly, I understand where you're coming from about James" you told him. "And we don't have to tell him until you're ready" you said. "But James loves you too. You know in a different way" you said, making him laugh a little. "I think he loves you more than he loves me-"

"That's not true" he insisted, making you chuckle.

"Either way, he would never turn his back on you" you insisted. "And neither will I" you assured him. He pulled you closer, kissing your temple before he wiped away your remaining tears.

"I'm so sorry, love" he whispered. "I don't want you to feel this way" he said. "I feel like I keep screwing up and hurting you-"

"It's okay, love" you assured him. "I mean, it's not the most ideal situation" you admitted. "But, we don't have to tell him until you're ready" you said. "I just... I don't particularly love that girls keep chasing after you" you mumbled, feeling your cheeks burn.

Sirius gently lifted your face slowly so you would look at him. "I promise I don't want to go out with anyone who's not you, love" he said. "Y-you trust me, right?"

You smiled sweetly at him, brushing his cheek with your thumb. "Of course, I do, love" you said, giving him a peck on the lips. "I love you" you said, feeling your heart flutter at the sweet smile on his face.

"I love you too" he said, giving you another kiss.

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

"Hey, mate, where did you disappear off to?" James asked when Sirius walked into the boys' dorm. "We didn't see you after lunch, or at Potions, Charms, or at dinner" he told him.

"I uh- was... around" he said, innocently.

"Mhm" James said, looking at Peter. "By yourself?" he asked, making Remus roll his eyes as he kept reading his book.

"I um... well... yeah" he shrugged

"Interesting" James said, sitting up.

"All afternoon?" Peter asked.

"Yes" he said, sitting on his bed and throwing his bag on the floor. "I went out and had a cigarette. What's the big deal?"

"You missed class-" Remus spoke for the first time.

"Nobody cares about that, Moony" James interrupted as he sat on his bed. "See, we happened to hear otherwise, Padfoot" he said, smirking at Sirius.

"What are you talking about, Prongs?" he frowned, looking between him and Remus.

"Well, since you obviously missed dinner, you missed what everyone was talking about" he continued.

"I doubt it was anything interesting-" Sirius started.

"Oh, but it was" James continued. "See it was about you and your new... girlfriend" he said, making Sirius' heart drop.

"M-my what now?"

"Your girlfriend" Remus said, suddenly very interested in the conversation, closing his book.

"What are you talking about?"

"Well, Padfoot, apparently someone saw you today walking out of the library with a mysterious girlfriend" James explained.

"That's insane" he said, chuckling nervously.

"No, mate, it's from a reliable source" Peter nodded.

"Really? Enlighten me, Wormy, who is your reliable source?"

"Marlene and Dorcas" James added. "They all said they saw you leaving with someone who had a Gryffindor scarf" he said, getting up and walking over to Sirius' bed. "So, either you have a Gryffindor girlfriend, or maybe you gave her your scarf" he said, sitting down next to him. "A bunch of girls were claiming it was them but according to Marls, it wasn't-"

"Do you really have nothing better to do than wondering if I am with someone-?"

"See, it all adds up" James continued. "Why you wouldn't go out with Emmeline, or any other girl for that matter" he said. "We just want to know why you didn't tell us!"

"Because it's none of your business!" Sirius said, getting up, frustrated.

"So it's true!" Peter smirked.

"I knew it!" James yelled at the same time. "Who is she?"

"You kind of built yourself up for that one, Pads" Remus told him.

"I didn't say it was true!" Sirius said, feeling nervous.

"You didn't deny it" James smirked. "C'mon Pads, tell us who she is!" Is it just a fling?"

"Yeah, who is this mystery girl and why did you hide it from us? Usually, you brag about your flings" Peter laughed.

"There's no mystery girl and it is not a fling-!"

"Again, you just keep setting yourself up, mate-" Remus intervened.

"Hey dorks, I need some food. I missed dinner" you said, suddenly entering your brother's dorm and the four boys turned to look at you.

"Oh, suddenly you're in a good mood again?" James asked, glaring at you a little.

"I am if you feed me" you said, walking over to your brother's night table because you knew he would have dinner's leftovers. Which coincidentally happened whenever you or Sirius would miss dinner.

"Hey, bug, did you hear about Sirius' secret girlfriend?" James asked suddenly, making you choke on the banana muffin munching on.

"W-what? Sirius has a secret girlfriend?" you pretended to be confused as Remus rolled his eyes when you sat next to him and dropped your bag on the floor.

"Yeah, we're trying to figure out who she is and why he didn't tell us" Peter added.

"Hold on" James said, sitting up and looking at your tossed bag on the floor. "What's that?"

"What's what?" you asked, with your mouth half-fulled at the same time Sirius did.

James noticed something peeking out of your bag. Something scarlet and gold. He quickly got up and grabbed it, taking it out.

"Why do you have a Gryffindor scarf?"

"I um-" you swallowed, nervously. "That's yours-"

"No" he insisted. "Mine is over there" he said, pointing at his opened trunk with his scarf on top, falling out of it.

"Uh- P-Prongs" Sirius started, but your brother looked deep in thought.

"How long do you reckon it's going to take him?" Remus muttered, sitting up.

"Oh for Merlin's sake! I can't take it anymore!" Sirius yelled, frustrated. "That's my scarf!"

"Now we'll never know" you mumbled, giving him a piece of your muffin.

"So, you're the mystery fling?" Peter asked with his jaw dropped.

"She's not a fling!" Sirius argued.

"Wait, how long has this been going on!?" James asked looking between you and Sirius.

"Well, we've actually been seeing each other since this summer" Sirius explained.

"SINCE SUMMER?!" James blurted out.

"Jamie, is not a big deal-" you tried.

"It is a big deal!" he argued. "How come I didn't know about this?" he asked, looking at Sirius.

"Well, I didn't know how you were going to react, Prongs and-"

"So you lied to me?"

"Technically we didn't lie" you told him. "We just didn't say anything-"

"Oh, don't use that with me, I invented that, bug" he glared at you. "Plus, today when we talked to Emmeline, you said you weren't dating!"

"No, I didn't" you argued.

"Yes, you did!"

"No, I didn't!"

"Yes, you did!" James complained as Remus, Sirius, and Peter kept looking between the two of you.

"No, actually, technically, I didn't" you insisted.

"Yes, you di- oohhh" he gasped, remembering your previous conversation. "You didn't! You clever bug, I'm impressed" he smirked, proudly as he gave you a high-fived and you accepted it, rolling your eyes a little. "So you two have been seeing each other for months now?"

"Pretty much" you said, still a bit nervous.

"And this is why you kept turning me down when I tried to set you up?" he asked Sirius.

"Yeah" he admitted.

"Are you happy with her?"

"I am. Very happy" Sirius quickly said.

"Are you happy with him?" he asked you.

"I really am" you replied.

"Okay" he said, sitting back on his bed.

"W-wait, you're... you're okay with this?" Sirius asked, extremely confused.

"Well, I don't love that you hid it from me but... yes, why wouldn't I be?" James shrugged.

"W-well, b-because I thought- are you kidding me? I thought you were going to kick my ass!"

"For dating my sister? You do know her, right? She's more than capable of kicking your ass" he laughed. "Plus, I'm assuming that since it's been going on for a long time it's... a serious relationship?"

"Well, we haven't had our first date yet, but... yes" Sirius said, sitting on your other side and holding your hand.

"Wait, you haven't had your first date, what the hell have you- no! You know what, I don't want to know" James said, glaring at you as you laughed.

"See, mate? I told you James wouldn't mind" Remus said, patting Sirius on the back and erasing James' smile off his face.

"E-excuse me?" James said, getting upset. "Remus knew?"

"Prongs" Sirius said getting up at the same time.

"You mean to tell me that the two of you have been together for months and YOU TOLD REMUS BEFORE ME?!!" he snapped.

"It was an accident, mate-"

"Oh, I'm sure it was!" James said, glaring at Sirius. "I can't believe you did this to me! Why would you betray me like this?!"

"I'm sorry, Prongs! I can make it up to you, okay? Honeydukes, this Saturday, I'll buy you all the candy you want!"

James stood there with his arms crossed. "... I'm listening" he caved.

"But I thought we were having our first date-"

"Oh, don't you even think so, bug! Remus knew!"

"This is going to be my whole life, isn't it?" you asked Remus and Peter.

"Yes."

The End

*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*

A/N: I know this was a roller coaster of emotions but I hope you loves liked it! :D

[moonsgemini]

american heartbreak - iii

summary: hangovers and early mornings don’t mix. The early farmer’s market is looking like June’s Everest but surprise visits and unexpected coffee rendezvous with Rafe makes it all worth it.

warnings: cowboy!rafe x oc, fem reader, she/her, mentions of possible break in, so much fluff, a little self depreciation, some sexual stuff-ish not smut tho, rafe being an absolute sweetheart

an: y’all I fell in love with this series again. I have no idea where it’s going but I like it so far! also idk who wants to be tagged in this anymore so that’s why I didn’t tag anyone

series masterlist - previous part

-

June Summers vowed to never drink again as she slumped in the foldable chair behind the buckets of flowers. She was glad Amber hadn’t woken up hungover so that she could take over most of the hospitality. If she talks too much she’s convinced she’ll puke again.

At least the cold was helping with the hangover, and she wasn’t entirely too mad about the previous night out. But then she remembered she threw up in front of Rafe and wants to crawl out of her skin. Embarrassment prickled at her spine thinking about how she wouldn’t be surprised if he never wants to hangout with her again.

“That poor boy is so love struck he watched you puke all over your boots and on his! and he really didn’t say a thing,” Amber laughed once some customers walked away.

June groaned pulling her brown carhartt jacket closer, it used to belong to her dad so it was oversized and well loved.

She didn’t need a reminder of the bad parts of last night. She had already been replaying it in her head, “He was just being nice. God he’s probably never going to want to see me again.” She closed her eyes and rubbed her temples trying to relieve the headache. She really wished she had some coffee right now.

“Uhhh I really highly doubt that,” Amber laughed beside her.

June looked up at her only to find her friend pointing in the direction of someone. When she looked over her heart dropped. Not sure if she was excited or not yet. Rafe held a cup holder of coffees and a grin on his perfect face as he walked towards the booth. His eyes never leaving June once he found her. Who was currently wanting to crawl out of her skin.

June ran her fingers through her hair to at least look somewhat put together. She crawled out of bed at the last minute and barely did anything to get ready.

She was seeing a lot more of Rafe than usual. It was causing her to have permanently sweaty palms and a rapid heart beat.

“Good mornin ladies,” Rafe nodded his head at the two women behind the endless bundles of flowers.

Amber smiled almost too widely, “Well good mornin Rafe. Now what brings you to the market?”

He chuckled, “Well I know you ladies had a long night. So I figured I’d bring some coffee,” He held one of the cups up and looked over at June, “Got your favorite June bug.”

The butterflies in her stomach fluttered, “T-thanks Rafe, you really didn’t have to,” She stood and walked around to meet him in front of the flowers, “Especially after last night.”

He watched her sip her coffee. Pride bloomed in his chest at her small smile and content sigh, “I had a feeling you’d need extra coffee today.”

“This is actually our first of the day,” Amber sighed dramatically while sipping her own coffee.

“Really?” Rafe questioned with raised brows, “I’m assuming you haven’t eaten either?”

June nodded, “We sorta woke up late.”

His brows furrowed in concern, “I’ll go get y’all food otherwise that hangover will never cure,” He was about to walk away to go to the diner for food when Amber stopped him.

“Rafe take June out, I can handle it from here,” Amber smirked knowing her friend wants to murder her but knows June will thank her later.

June started getting nervous, “Uh are you sure Amber? But you need food too.”

She shrugged, “I’ll call James to bring me something. Plus you drank more than I did so you need some bacon in your system.”

“You heard the woman. Come on June bug, breakfast on me,” He smiled at her.

June’s face felt hot and the nausea she had been feeling was coming back ten fold. She’d never spent that much alone time with him and the thought of it was making her sick. At the same time she was feeling giddy that he was so willing to take her out. It was all so confusing. His charm and kindness not helping her feelings.

June stood up and grabbed her purse, “Okay well if things start to get crazy call me Amber.”

“Mhmmm sure,” Amber smirked as she waved them off.

-

June sat across from Rafe in Mickey’s Diner. It was everyone’s favorite breakfast spot in town, they had the best waffles. Which was what June was currently working on in front of her. The toast and bacon she already had helped her feel like herself again.

Rafe noticed the color returning to her cheeks. He was starting to really enjoy taking care of her. He knows she’s fully capable of doing it herself which is why it felt good that she was letting him do this.

They had talked about anything and everything. Once he had the conversation going her nerves calmed but the butterflies still fluttered every now and then. They reminisced on old elementary school days, when they used to play soccer together, and ride horses. June came to realize that Rafe was so easy to talk to because he always listened and gave his full attention.

“Juney I think you and I need to hangout more,” Rafe said with a lopsided grin before taking the last bite of his omelette.

She let out a breathy laugh looking down at her suddenly much more interesting waffles, “You don’t mean that.”

His brows furrowed in confusion, “You should know by now I never say anything I don’t mean.”

Their waitress, Tamara, walked over saving June from Rafe’s intense words, “Everything good y’all? Need more coffee miss summers?”

She shook her head, “Yes please Tammy.” She nodded her head smiling and began refilling the vintage blue mug. The three of them had gone to high school together. Tamara worked at the diner in high school and eventually bought it out and fixed it up.

“I’ll leave the check here for you but no rush. You take all the time you need,” She winked at the pair before sauntering off.

Everyone knew about Rafe and June, they weren’t blind. They saw the way June got flustered when she was around him and all the longing stares she sent his way. At first no one saw it in Rafe but his all consuming crush became well all consuming. He couldn’t hide how his eyes lit up and he stood up a little straighter when June was around anymore.

“So what do you have planned for the rest of the day?” He asked as he swallowed his last bite of hash browns, “The shop isn’t open today right?”

She shook her head, “‘No it’s just the farmer’s market we do on Sunday’s and well I guess I’m off for today,” She laughed softly. If she thought about how she was having breakfast with Rafe after puking her guts out in front of him she’d start to feel light headed. Having his attention was addicting and overwhelming.

“You deserve a day off, especially after last night.”

She groaned, “Don’t remind me, it’s so embarrassing.” The heat of embarrassment traveled up her neck and to her cheeks.

He shook his head with a playful smile, “Don’t be. It happens to the best of us. Can I tell you a secret?” He began to whisper as he leaned in slightly. She nodded her head curiously.

“I’ve been in that same position myself maybe once of twice,” He shrugged, “or more than a few times.”

She laughed sitting up straight, “I don’t think that’s much of a secret Rafe.”

He shrugged again a smirk playing on his lips, “But it made you feel better right?”

She nodded. His story didn’t exactly make her feel better, more like his small effort to not let her feel embarrassed.

“Back to what’s important, what are your plans today?”

She thought for a second about what her plans were. June was going to spend her afternoon watching cheesy rom coms with popcorn and order greasy pizza for dinner. Probably home alone because James and Amber usually spent the evenings together. But things have changed, “Uh no I was just going to watch movies all afternoon.”

He nodded and hummed, “Hmmm so that means we’re spending the day together.”

She nearly choked on the last sip of coffee, “Oh, we are?”

He smiled, “We are June bug. When was the last time you came over?”

June couldn’t believe this conversation was happening. Rafe wanted to spend the entire day together. Things like that don’t happen to June Summers.

“Umm probably not since Sarah’s graduation party. She always comes to ours when she’s in town.”

“It really has been that long,” He realized he hadn’t heard the echo of her laugh coming down the hallway in years. He loved when Sarah invited her over. He cleared his throat as he pulled out his wallet, “Then today is the day you go back and I’ll show you around the Ranch. We’ve got some new cows and horses I want to introduce you to.”

She laughed, “Whatever you want Rafe. Oh I can pay for mine that’s okay,” she reached for her purse but Rafe’s loud scoff stopped her.

“I’d never make a pretty girl pay for a meal. Your company is payment enough bug.”

Her cheeks were going to melt off her face if he kept making her feel this hot and mushy.

-

Rafe felt like he was in one of his daydreams. Sunday’s were his days to relax and rest. On those days he’d spend them on the back porch day dreaming of June. Walking with her through the pasture to the big willow tree that was at the end of their land. He’d be holding her hand, pulling her towards him every few minutes to plant a kiss on her lips. She’d laugh and blush as she hugged him or playfully pushed him. But then Ward would come outside and sit next to him. He’d start talking about Rafe’s upcoming ride and that daydream would be nothing but a dream.

Now his dreams were coming to fruition as he and June walked towards the willow tree. Except he couldn’t pull her in for a kiss or wrap his arms around her. At least not yet.

After breakfast Rafe drove them to his house. June was greeted by his border collie Ranger as she stepped inside the familiar home. He led her outback and showed her the two new cows they got. As well as the baby chicks that just hatched.

He watched her swoon over the cute animals and it made his heart swoon. How gently she held the baby chick and spoke it as if it were a real baby. God he was royally screwed. This crush he thought he could hide and suppress throughout the years was impossible to tame these days.

Now he was walking them towards the willow tree. The soft breeze of the afternoon making the smell of her shampoo float his way. She had also taken off her jacket and hoodie leaving her in a black tank top and jeans that made her ass look fantastic.

Rafe was struggling to keep his eyes from wandering. It was hard when her tank top would ride up a little and reveal a sliver of her stomach. Her skin looking so soft and smooth he wanted to lick it. The tank top also revealed a good bit of cleavage that had him practically drooling.

June was trying her absolute best not to combust. It felt like she was seven running around the Cameron ranch with Sarah as Rafe tried to tag one of them. Except this time Sarah wasn’t there and they’re not playing tag. Rafe isn’t a nine year old boy but a grown man, a very handsome grown man. One with big arms and facial hair.

Once they reached the willow tree Rafe spread out the blanket he had brought. June sat down and closed her eyes enjoying the breeze and the warm sun that peeked through the willow tree. Rafe sat beside her leaning back on his hands. He watched her as the wind blew the little pieces of hair that framed her face. The sun making her skin look glowy and kissable.

“I don’t care what anybody says, I could never leave this town,” She said turning to him. She was surprised to find him looking at her already.

He nodded, “This place is beautiful but you never want that big city life?”

She laughed shaking her head, “I don’t think it’s for me. I like being close to everyone I care about and I love my job here.”

“Some days I wanna leave,” Rafe admits as he turns to watch the cows feeding behind the fence a few yards away.

June’s brows furrowed, “Really?”

He nodded, “The people can get a bit too much. All the gossip, and being away from my dad kinda sounds nice some days.”

She tucked her hair behind her ear as she picked at some tufts of grass, “You do get gossiped about a lot huh?”

“About how I do on rides, who I’m sleeping with, what am I gonna do when I can’t do this anymore. It’s just a lot sometimes but I’ve got a couple reason’s to stay,” He shrugged looking over at her with a smirk.

A spark of confidence ignited in her, “Good, I’d miss seeing you around.”

He looked over at her with a hint of a smug smirk, “Yeah?”

She nodded her head, “Who else would still want to be my friend after watching me puke.”

He laughed, “I’d still be your friend even if you puked on me. You can never get rid of me June bug.”

Her face heated up. Even if she never got to have Rafe the way she imagined at night before she fell asleep then she’d settle for his friendship.

-

Rafe and June sat under that willow tree and talked for hours. Until the sky turned to pink and purple hues, then Rafe drove her home and walked her to her door. It felt like a date. She wished he’d kiss her on the porch and ask her out again, but it didn’t happen.

He waited until he heard her lock the door from the inside and then headed back to his truck. A small smile on his lips, it was the best day he’d had in a really long time.

No bull ride, no trophy, no adrenaline rush was as good as spending time with June.

-

A few days later June was sat at home after a long day of getting a wedding order ready. She had changed into her cute pajamas and put on her comfort movie, how to lose a guy in 10 days, and was eating ice cream out of the carton. Amber was spending the night at James’ so she bad the house all to herself.

She figures this is what her life is going to look like when Amber moves in with James. It’s not happening yet but you had a feeling it would soon. She didn’t mind being alone, sometimes it was pretty nice after the chaos of a long day. There was no need to worry about her every move and be polite to everyone she could just be.

The only downside was that she had way too much time to think about Rafe and his big hands and broad shoulders. She could drool just thinking about his handsome face. Spending the day with him had only intensified her crush. It was far more than a crush now. June was convinced she’d never be in a relationship because the only man she wants is him. Yet it doesn’t feel like the only woman he wants is her.

The opinions she had of herself were causing her to go into a spiral of overthinking. What if Rafe just liked being friends with her because he wasn’t attracted to her and liked just being friends. He probably never means for it to go anywhere. He’s had all this time if he wanted June so why would he just act on it now.

June felt like she wasn’t as pretty as the other girls she typically saw around Rafe. They were all bombshells with much more to offer than her. She was soft and comfortable, something she doesn’t think Rafe is looking for.

Her self deprecating thoughts came to a halt as she heard rustling on her front porch. It sounded like someone was walking around. Then June swears she heard the door knob jiggle, like someone trying to open it.

In that moment she regretted telling James they didn’t need a camera. After a minute silence June turned around on the couch and tried to peak through the blinds but she couldn’t see anything. Plus if there were an intruder she didn’t want to open the blinds all the way and give herself away.

Her palms began to sweat at the thought of someone coming in while she slept. She grabbed her phone off the coffee table and debated on who to call.

She didn’t want to interrupt James and Ambers night over something that was probably silly. Also calling the sheriff felt a little embarrassing if it ended up being a raccoon.

Her thumb hovered over the first person she thought of but wasn’t sure if she should bother him. Then the footsteps on the porch sounded heavier as they walked around probably trying to peak through the windows.

“Oh god,” June mumbled in fear, “just do it.” She groaned to herself as she pressed call.

After two rings he answered, “Hey sweetheart.” He said and she could tell he was smiling. If she wasn’t frozen in fear her heart would have swelled.

“Rafe,” She whispered, “I think someone is trying to break in.”

Rafe was also on his couch doing nothing. He had been debating on heading down to the bar. James was out with Amber and that was really his only friend despite everyone claiming to be his friend.

He was on high alert now sitting up straight, “What? Where are you?” Now he was standing putting his shoes on and grabbing his keys

“I’m home alone, it sounds like someone is walking around the house,” She said in a hushed tone.

June heard Rafe’s front door slam closed and the crunch of gravel as he basically ran to his truck, “I’ll be there in ten. Just stay on the phone with me.”

She nodded but realized he couldn’t see her, “Okay.”

“Where are you right now?” He asked as he drive down the dirt road leaving his ranch.

June had tucked herself into the corner of their sectional under her big fuzzy blanket, “Uh on the couch. I’m too scared to move.”

“That’s okay bug,” A side of his mouth quirked at the thought of her all cozied up on the couch.

She sighed, “Maybe I should have that camera installed huh?” She joked.

“I’ll set one up tomorrow.”

“It’s okay Rafe I can d-“

“I know you can June bug but I want to,” He cut her off, “I don’t like you being there alone with no type of security.”

She was glad he couldn’t see the blush that rose to her cheeks, “I live with Amber though so I’m not always alone.”

“Well both of you need it. Plus Amber and James have been having way too many date nights lately so you’re alone more often than not,” He argued.

“That’s true,” June hadn’t really noticed that Amber has been gone a lot lately.

A pit in her stomach formed at the thought of not living with her best friend. Of course she was happy for her but it was bitter sweet.

The sound of a car in the drive way pulled her out of her thoughts, “I’m pulling up, I’ll knock on the door after I’ve looked around okay?”

“Okay,” She mumbled and then he hung up. Knowing Rafe was outside brought her out of her frozen fear and she got up to pace the living room. Biting her nails as she awaited his knock. June heard more rustling outside but she was sure it was Rafe now.

A few minutes later he knocked on the door and called her name. She rushed over unlocking and opening it to reveal the 6’2 cowboy. He was wearing a backwards hat that had her throat tightening. He smiled at her and opened his mouth about to say something when he took in what she was wearing.

Rafe was sure she was trying to torture him.

Her small pajama set had his jeans feeling tight in the front. The small black tight shorts and the small lilac tank top she had on were leaving very little to the imagination. To top it all off she wasn’t wearing a bra and the cool summer air was making her nipples pebble just begging to be touched by him.

He cleared his throat and looked back up at her. June had noticed her lack of clothing and crosses her arms over her chest. Which didn’t really help Rafe it just pushed her boobs up and made her shirt ride up so the soft skin of her stomach was showing.

He swallowed harshly, “Uh there’s nothing to be worried about sweetheart. If there was someone here they’re gone, it could have been a raccoon.”

She nodded, “Okay, thank you Rafe for coming. I just didn’t know who else to call.”

He leaned against the doorway with his arms crossed, “You can call me whenever you need me. I’ll be there.” June was going to have a permanent blush because of him.

“Can you stay with me?” She asked abruptly.

His eyes widened slightly. Not because he didn’t want to but because he’s so surprised she asked first. He was already trying to find a way to coax her to hangout with him.

She took his silence as rejected and her word vomiting started, “It’s okay if you don’t. I’m sure everything’s fine and you probably have plans. Like with your friends or like a date or something.”

Rafe shook his head with a soft smile, “Nope no plans other than hanging out with you.” He stepped in and shut the door behind him.

She followed him back to the living room with a small smile on her face. He was not helping the crush that was blooming into something way more.

It’s always been something more. It’s always been that scary word that she’s never felt like admitting to anyone. It was easy to keep the feelings down and minimize it to an infatuation level but lately those feelings have been fighting to be let out. Rafe’s kindness was too much for her.

He plopped down on the couch right in the middle, “What are we watching?”

She squeezed herself back into the corner of the couch. Her bare legs touching his jean clad ones. Their shoulders brushing against each other. Were the walls suddenly closing in on her?

“I was watching how to lose a guy in 10 days but we can watch something else since it’s almost over,” She shrugged.

He looked over at her with a mischievous smirk, “How about a scary movie?”

“After all of that? No thank you.” She huffed.

He laughed, “Come on I’m here now to protect you June bug.”

She sighed dramatically, “Fine, but you pick.”

-

They were on the third movie of the Scream franchise when her eyelids started getting heavier. It was hard to fight sleep when she was so cozy tucked into the couch with her blanket she was sharing with Rafe.

At some point, during a jump scare, her head ended up on his shoulder. After the scene was over she didn’t bother to move it and Rafe didn’t seem to mind.

The movie was over when Rafe heard her small snores beside him. He smiled as he looked down at her. Lips pouty and a small furrow between her brows. He didn’t want to wake her so he gently moved his arm so her head was now on his chest. She snuggled closer up to him.

Rafe was in heaven. He wished time could stop and it could just be this forever. He did his best to maneuver her to pick June up bridal style to take her up to her room.

As he started walking up the stairs she stirred in his arms, “Mmph Rafe?” She mumbled.

“It’s okay baby just go back to sleep,” He murmured trying to ignore the fact that that was the first time he’d ever used that pet name for her.

She mumbled, “Stay.”

“Huh?” He asked as he gently kicked the door to her room open. It smelled like June in there and Rafe was ready to drown in it.

“Stay with me,” She mumbled as he set her down on the soft bed, “What if ghost face gets me.”

June would blame her boldness on the fact that she was half asleep, but she wasn’t regretting a single word.

He chuckled softly, “I’ll stay. But uh,” he scratched the back of his head, “I just need to take my clothes off.” He wasn’t usually shy so he doesn’t know where this bashfulness was coming from.

June nodded and mumbled, “Perfect.”

He laughed and took his shoes, shirt, and jeans off. Leaving him in just his boxers and hat. He tossed the hat onto her dresser before gently pushing her over so he could slide in. She was already asleep again but the dip in the bed woke her up a bit. Enough to have her inching towards him to lay her head on his chest. He really hoped she wouldn’t feel how hard he is and freak her out. He’s not even horny he’s just excited to be so close to her.

Rafe was sure this was heaven.

[yesimwriting]

Without Faith

a/n giggling and kicking my feet rn btw, this is meant to be a set up for something longer! lmk if you're interested in part 2 :)

Summary: After a news story that was only meant to be an internship assignment spirals into a crime story that earns national attention, you feel conflicted enough about your involvement to join a criminal psychology class despite being a journalism major. Despite your good intentions, the universe seems to have it out for you considering your slightly older professor is extremely attractive and the only person that seems to understand what you're going through.

Warnings/info: age gap (reader is of consenting age tho!!), future student-professor relationship, slow burn, slight changes to how college works for the sake of plot, a surprising amount of lore (i got carried away), me writing for a character for a first time on here so be kind 😭

----

It's not often one finds their enemy crumpled up and lying helplessly next to an overflowing garbage can. It's even rarer to see that and still feel the bitter sting of defeat.

"He didn't text me back, which is weird because when I ran into him on Friday--" Carlie, who might know you better than you know yourself, pauses.

You turn your head away from the trash in an attempt to abandon the newspaper as completely as the person who had thrown it away. "You saw James last week? You didn't tell me."

She watches you for a moment, her eyebrows pulling together in a way that tells you she won't accept your lie just because you're offering her an opportunity to re-dissect her most recent interaction with her latest target. "You know I did."

Carlie shifts her weigh from one foot to the other, her eyes drifting towards the ground. "It's there because it's old--it's over."

It's over. The words crack themselves against your skull. More than a sentence, more than a promise. The only consolation the state's attorney could offer grieving families. The sound ringing in your ears as a mother gave into her agony, a choked sob ripping its way out of her throat.

It's over--the catalyst that sent the mother to you in a parking lot illuminated by stale, synthetic lighting. They're the reason for her confession, that in some off-kilter way she thought the verdict would make her feel better.

It's over--the syllables that accompany the sound of the needle leaving Josh Robinson's lifeless body. Killed by the justice system or the media?

"You didn't do anything wrong." Carlie's voice is careful in its unflinchingness. "He was a serial killer. You--you wrote the truth."

And while this awareness has bound itself to your bones, it is rarely enough to make you forget what you did wrong. Journalists are impartial, they don't--they're supposed to understand, they're supposed to be careful. You took it a step further.

"I know."

You don't need to look up to know that you haven't convinced her. However, you must have sounded okay enough for Carlie to accept moving on. "And you're doing more than anyone else would do to make your true crime even better."

It's an exaggeration. Journalists have done a lot more for their careers than request to join a class that belongs to a department unrelated to their degree. But Carlie seems so happy to be able to compliment you, you decide to go with a less sentimental correction, "Not true crime."

"I know, journalism." She sighs, but continues to walk forward in a way that feels oddly optimistic. Maybe even relieved. "Make sure you point out the difference to the professor. I'm sure he'll love that."

You roll your eyes at her sarcasm, but follow her lead anyway. You've already perfected the elevator pitch you're planning to present to Dr. Spencer Reid. A brief but genuine description of the importance of ethical journalism, especially when it comes to writing about serial killers.

You're well practiced and far from worried about winning him over. Academic authority figures have always taken well to you...it also doesn't hurt that you spent all night googling him just to be safe.

"Actually," she begins, pulling open the door to the psychology building, "I bet there's no room for original material in the interaction that you've already imagined, planned, and mentally rehearsed."

You scoff as you step past the door's threshold. "No," the word is dismissive and entirely unconvincing. You instinctually move past it. "Go talk to your advisor about your thesis, I'll meet with Dr. Reid, and then we can order food or something."

The reminder of her own meeting seems to kill the mood, her smile morphing into something more focused. Carlie lets out a small breath. "Right. We got this." And with one final assuring nod, Carlie turns towards the stairwell.

----

The thought is a dull ache that wedges itself into your chest before you can bring yourself to knock against the door. It'll follow you forever.

When you step into the room, Dr. Reid will inevitably ask why you want to join his class. And then you'll have to answer.

You exhale as you extend your arm, knuckles rapping against the wooden surface before overthinking can hurt you any further. After a brief silence, you hear a slightly muffled, "Come in."

You reach for the brass handle, pulling the door open before stepping past the doorway's threshold.

The office is comfortable, a large desk and two plush chairs manage to share the space without seeming cramped. There's a pencil holder and several stacks of papers on the desk's surface. If one ignores the degrees--and the age of the recipient when he received them--on the walls, the office seems normal. Almost suspiciously so. There's even a partially wilted plant sitting on the windowsill.

After taking in the room, you let your attention fall to the individual behind the desk. He's--he--while you've read enough about Dr. Reid to already respect him, and are fully aware that he is far from your peer, you're also now looking at him.

Last night, you did stumble onto a few pictures of him that forced you to reluctantly make a mental note of the fact that he's aesthetically pleasing, but those occasionally blurry snapshots did him and his sharp features little justice.

"Hello," the word is an instinct, slipping past your lips before you're ready to speak.

"Hi," his response is as sudden and lacking in context as your own--a fact that immediately eases you.

Dr. Reid shifts, back straightening against his seat. "You're here for your appointment." You barely have the chance to nod in confirmation before he's continuing, "Come in, take a seat."

In all honesty, you're more glad for the direction than the excuse to sit. You enter his office fully, approaching the plush chair in front of his desk. You sit down, lips parting before you're ready to speak. All structured thoughts have abandoned you.

"Hi." You realize your mistake immediately. You blink, a sound between a self deprecating laugh and a sigh escaping you. "I already said that."

If Dr. Reid thinks anything of your mistake, he gives no indication of it. His expression remains steady, with the exception of the corner of his mouth briefly tugging itself upwards.

Your hands come together on your lap, one of your nails pressing into the nail bed of the thumb on your opposite hand before forcing yourself to relax. You've read enough about his work with the FBI to know that he's so adept at analyzing behavior, you don't need to make it easy for him by giving into obvious signs of nervousness.

"Like I mentioned in my email, I'm interested in joining your class even though it's not an elective and in an entirely different department than my degree." This part is easy, a perfunctory explanation of what he already knows. "However, there is enough overlap that my advisor is supportive of the idea and has already signed off on it."

He shifts again, his pointer finger tapping against the surface of his desk. "Right, she mentioned that, but she didn't mention why."

Okay. This is the part that matters. "I'm a journalism major, and I've recently completed an internship with The Washing Sun." In an act of total self betrayal, you study his expression for any hint of recognition. Finding absolutely none makes it easier to breathe. "And spending time in such an active, journalistic environment has made me fully aware of the way that morals and personal views can complicate ethics."

You pause, pressing your lips together. "I'd like the opportunity to learn about certain behaviors in order to develop a perspective separate from my own.

Though still politely neutral, something behind Dr. Reid's eyes implies an uncertainty that has the rest of your pitch jamming itself down your throat. Whatever's changed doesn't feel like disbelief, and you're far from worried about being accused of lying. You were careful to comb through your mess of emotions before you had even pitched the idea to your advisor--you do feel those things, they're just not the only things you feel.

How delusional had you been to assume the same answers that hid their vagueness behind a heavy layer of altruism that worked on Mrs. Carol would work on a FBI profiler?

"I um--" The sound of your own voice surprises you. "I know what it's like to write something when you can't feel anything for the person everyone's already rooting against, and I'd like to not feel that again." Another glimmer of honesty, barer than your curated story, but still not exactly everything.

Dr. Reid is quiet for a moment, studying you with an openness that should make your skin crawl. "What did it feel like?"

The question throws you. Friends, family, strangers--they've all asked you things about the case, about your article, about hundreds of other things so barely connected you couldn't fathom an answer. No one has ever asked you about that feeling.

"Uh..." You're not even sure you have an answer. "Weird." Your blankness feels like such a cop out, you feel the need to try again. What did it feel like? A hybrid beast made of a festering not-quite-guilt, an over awareness of your every action, all held together by an uneasy pride...that only served to further aggravate the not guilt. "Like I was doing something right and wrong, with no way of knowing what it was more of."

You squeeze your hands together, allowing yourself to focus on the action instead of him. "I'm sorry, that probably doesn't make much sense."

When you finally lift your head, Dr. Reid is already looking at you. A moment passes, the somberness of his features growing heavier in the silence. Maybe he's looking at something past you. "It does."

The affirmation is a small, fragile thing, so faint and far away it almost feels like an intrusion to have heard it. Some selfish part of you latches onto that, his unexpected understanding a lifeline you can't let go of.

You almost thank him before realizing that you have no idea what you'd be thanking him for. "I'm glad," you settle on, fingers carefully coming apart on your lap. "The writing thing's no good if I don't make sense."

The attempt at humor seems to pull him back from wherever he had gone. "Then you have nothing to worry about." He doesn't exactly smile, but there's something easy about the way he's looking at you. "I'll approve your enrollment request."

Relief floods through you immediately. "Really?"

"Maybe it'll help you feel less...weird." From him, your too plain adjective feels a lot more fitting.

You nod once, the motion quick and polite. "Hopefully." The beat of silence that follows comes closer to kinship than anything you've ever felt in someone's office. You're also fully aware of the fact that you've gotten what you came for and that Dr. Reid is likely a very busy man. "I shouldn't take up anymore of your time."

His fingers tap against his desk. "Right. I'll see you in class."

You smile as you stand. "See you then."

The walk towards the door is a lot less intimidating now. Still, once you reach it, you can't bring yourself to immediately reach for the handle. You pause, letting out a breath before turning around. "Dr. Reid?"

He looks up, nodding once in a way that's meant to prompt you. Maybe it's overkill, but it feels necessary and it's too late to back out now. "Thank you."

"You're welcome." He doesn't look away from you after responding.

There's nothing left to expect, there are no words or anything else meant to be said. That's not enough to stop some unknown feeling from wedging itself between your ribs, urging you to something, to say anything that might come close to offering him the same kind of understanding he's given you.

"I hope you find a less weird, too."

He doesn't respond, but something about the look behind his eyes and his slight nod makes you feel okay about leaving him.

----

There are few ideologies that have clung to him, and even fewer that have managed to bind themselves to some integral part of his being that exists beneath his skin.

The pursuit of knowledge is one of the few constants Spencer Reid allows himself to rely on, one of the only things he allows himself to consider a saving grace. However, circumstance has prevented his views on the subject from skewing. The irony of the fact that some things are better left unknown is not lost on him.

For example, the girl that walked into his office and immediately saw through him, is better left a mystery. He'd see her in class, he'd answer her questions, he'd grade her work and offer her necessary feedback--but he will not know her.

It's a mantra, a promise that he repeats in his head again and again as his attention falls to the desktop in front of him. He attempts to grasp onto this lack of knowledge, to transform it into a tangible entity to keep him from typing your name into the search engine.

----

a/n spencer entering his garcia era while googling reader 💻🧑‍💻

anyways in ur interested in part 2 or would like to be tagged let me know!!

[obzessed]

HP characters : powerpoint presentation headcanon

This is so random but here is how I imagine marauders' era characters doing a powerpoint presentation

The Marauders

Do over the top presentations, (down to using costumes, yes) would make the wildest powerpoint (too many colors because they can’t agree on anything)

They make it really fun and entertaining tho

use the airplane (flying broom ??) transition, except the airplane is on fire for some reason

indian drama level of presentation

Will Not stop giggling and interrupting each other

Jocks in middle school vibe, but they’re actually really smart

here to clown and have a laugh

generally get a high grade but get points deducted for clarity and taking too damn long

Severus Snape (+bonus Lily Evans)

In a solo presentation, Severus would make perfect, pristine presentation

King of bullet points

University standards powerpoints

only uses peer reviewed articles

always criticizes said peer reviewed articles

Never uses notes, but doesn't look the audience in the eyes ever

Doesn't look at the audience period

He's not shy, he doesn't even do it consciously

Extremely complicated subjects, Will Not Dumb It Down For You

If anyone has a question, will look at them as if they’re the biggest idiot in the room

The type to explain by simply reformulating what he just said

If they still don’t understand either sighs dramatically and moves on, or sighs dramatically and start drawing on the board, speaking veeeryyyyy slowly, you let me know where I lost you idiot fellow classmate

Actually explains really well when he puts in some effort, has this clean cut way of decomposing each problem and detailing each point, then tying it all back together that makes it really easy to follow

writing on the board and drawing legitimately helps him lay out his thought process

the condescension is just a plus

Type of presentation that is objectively very good and interesting and well thought out but like. no one cares. bring back the airplane transitions.

For a few people sufficiently advanced and interested and who actually understand what he’s talking about, (and who are not rebuked by his style and general attitude), it’s a v good presentation

Positive : Always adds something new and generally brings really pertinent arguments, genuinely passionate about what he’s talking about

Teachers pick up on his fast out of the box thinking and surprising creativity

his powerpoint design is a little depresso, no colors except to highlight important words

very minimalist and to the point

Regulus argues every point of his presentation

Academic rivals to lovers frfr

Gets point deducted for his attitude and his “lack of enthusiasm”

NOW Severus + Lily = best of both worlds, get an O everytime

Lily always insists on using canva (their pwp designs are so cute)

overall they balance each other really well

I feel like Lily would get a little giggly if she fumbles

The marauders would def shout “boring” and giggle like middleschoolers at the back of the class during Snape's presentation

Snape's ability to remain unfazed in the face of bs stems from there

God help them all if they get paired up for a presentation

Marauders + Severus

Snape would have to settle for at least one airplane transition

It would become a war of adding and deleting each other's progress on the pwp design

they split it in two but they try to gain terrain on the other's part like in Clash of Clan

They are at WAR

“I am a commander in battle and your slides are but a village on a map” James Potter

“Fuck you” Severus Snape

“Go jump off an airplane if you like them so much”

Somehow the presentation is even more chaotic than the previous one

passive aggressively asks the other to click on the next slide

always takes the other's question just as they're about to speak

If Snape sees a single one of them look at their notes for too long it's on sight (RIP Pettigrew)

Bc Fuck if he's gonna lose points over this

best or worst grade

lots of brain cells

Teacher tried to make the braincells hold hands but the brain cells are Enemies

[labyrinthhofmymind]

how i think jily first kiss went even tho no one asked:

it’s end of sixth year and james’ birthday is coming up. james and lily are good friends now and everyone hangs out with each other and the gryffindor common room is just a great place to be right now.

lily is fully aware of james’ birthday at this point, and has realised that she likes james as more than a friend and wants to be with him. and of course james does not shut up about his birthday and has this whole bit with lily about what she’s going to get him, but she refuses to tell him. lily in fact, doesn’t tell anyone about what she’s going to get james for his birthday, just calling it a “surprise”.

eventually james’ birthday rolls around and it’s a big hit, everyone is drunk and having fun, including lily and james. during the night james asks lily one final time about her gift and when she’s going to give it to him, and lily finally agrees that it’s time.

so lily nervously drags james out of the common room and tells him to close his eyes whilst she gets the present that was “too big to fit inside”. james stands there excitedly with his eyes close and once lily has composed herself she moves closer to him, cups his face, and kisses him. it’s not a super long kiss, and when lily pulls back james opens his eyes and looks in absolute disbelief.

meanwhile lily is internally freaking out, scared that james doesn’t want her anymore and that the kiss was bad. so she quietly asks if he liked her birthday gift, and james just smiles like he won the fucking lottery and pulls lily back in for another kiss.

they then proceed to make out for like 5 minutes outside of the common room until eventually lily pulls away and reminds james that he has a birthday party to host. and james insists that he really doesn’t, and that none of that matters anymore, but lily insists they go back.

so they start to walk back in, but not before lily assures james that they have time, and they can pick up where they left off tomorrow. james looks at her with so much hope and happiness, asking if that means she’ll go out with him, and lily just laughs and kisses him again.

they spend the rest of the night not so subtly staring at each other and touching and dancing and just enjoying each other’s company, and by the time morning rolls around they’re both sprawled out asleep on the gryffindor common room couch, lily resting her head on james’ chest.

[yamujiburo]

Ahh I just want to say I love how you manage to keep body type differences consistent! 💖💕

I love how Jessie is fuller, while Delia is petite, and it’s consistent in every pose 💖💕💖💕

I just love that, I wonder what your thought process is when you draw them, do you use references? Or do you practice with a model?

Thank you! I think I could be more consistent but I'm glad it reads! At this point I don't use reference for these characters since I've drawn em so much haha. Took me a while to find a shorthand for Delia's hair that I liked tho

Thought process for posing? For these comics in particular I try to be economical and use poses that are nice to look at and good to come back to so I don't have to do so much redrawing. I stage them in a way where I'm not breaking the 180 rule for clarity and also try to keep a general sense of where I want the text in mind.

If you meant thought process for the how I draw them I just kinda have an idea in my head of what they feel like to me. There's not a whooole lot of body diversity in anipoke and I try to keep my style true-ish to it. So to differentiate the characters a bit more I give them little details that aren't super noticeable but make them feel unique. I make Jessie taller, despited Jessie and Delia being around the same "adult woman" height they use in the anime. I give Jessie LONG legs and bigger boobs (lol) while I make Delia shorter, with slightly stockier legs, longer torso and more hip. Jessie and James more or less have the same face in earlier seasons of the show but when I draw them, I tend to give Jessie sharper eyes and those two pointy eyelashes at the corners of her eyes, and more upper eyelid. Then I make James' eyes rounder/softer, bigger pupils and sometimes give him bottom lashes. I sometimes give him a flatter nose depending on what style I'm using

Hope that answers the question haha

[muirmarie]

i do tho need to have mccoy dragged into any/all situations at all times. i need him to exist, and be sitting innocently by himself, and then be fully dragged into a Situation, be it a relationship or a girls' night or what have you.

the girls' night is my point, btw. i need:

the crew staying at a fancy hotel for a fancy work shindig

mccoy grabbing a drink by himself at the hotel bar

chapel and uhura dropping by to grab a drink (#pregaming) and making small talk with mccoy

them bullying him into coming upstairs to their room to show him something vaguely work related (looking back: this was clearly a lie)

he is now trapped in their room. they are getting ready to go out, but they're still talking to him. he is too southern gentleman polite to just leave.

his fingernails are getting painted. they actually look really great so he can't even complain. but he's going to complain anyway.

they are ignoring his complaining.

there are now five other women in this room. he's a little tipsy. someone is doing his eyeliner.

is he allowed to leave?

no, no chapel and uhura have informed him he's not allowed to leave. hmm.

oh, they're all going to a club.

uhura, he loves you, but he's a doctor, not a -

what a great point all twelve (12??) of you make. to the club he will go.

he's not a dancer, he's -

all right, he has been informed he's both a doctor and a dancer

i mean, this is actually pretty fun.

he does actually know how to dance quite well, he took lessons, he just -

chapel if you are filming this he is going to -

excuse him one moment someone is being a creep and he needs to go stand menacingly behind his girls (who will definitely clean the floor with said creep, but still.)

oh look jim kirk rushing to the rescue what a shocker

sorry jim i have been informed that i am not allowed to hang out with you and spock tonight. i am otherwise occupied.

christine, are they allowed to -

no, jim, you are not allowed to hang out with us. it's girls' night.

jim i swear to fuck this is not me not allowing you i don't even know why i am here jim i -

yes, spock, i am wearing nail polish. thank you. that's nice of you to say.

hold on, is nail polish something like???? sexy??? for vulcans???? because of y'alls hand kinks????

lmao jim look at how much he's blushing

i don't care how good i looked - if you took a video of me dancing james tiberius kirk i will end you. i will end -

oh wait sorry i have just been informed i have to go. we're going to another club.

(help me)

[myfictionaldreams]

I noticed in your poly!marauders breakfast in bed imagine when Remus said that if she doesn't tell them he would punish her. Do you think you could write an alternative version of that imagine where he does end up punishing her? Only if your comfortable with it tho

Pain Over Pleasure // Poly!Marauders x Fem!Reader

A/N: thank you for the request! I hope you enjoy!

Breakfast in bed link if anyone is interested ღ

Tags: 18+ readers only, smut, foursome, threesome, angst, punishment, painful sex, rough sex, BDSM, dom/sub, spanking, humiliation, dacryphilia (crying), sir kink, size difference, praise kink, anal sex, cum swallowing, degradation, orgasm denial, intense orgasm, overstimulation, aftercare, subspace, restraints, being ignored as punishment, safe words in place

Words: 5.8k

my masterlist 📚 AO3 Link

You knew the pain had slowly consumed the pleasure you were experiencing but for some occasions such as now, you preferred that, the small sparks of pleasure almost like a reward through the burning pain in your cunt.

A thick glob of cum was slowly dripping out of your mouth from where it hung over the side of the bed, hand scrapping along the floor. There was a pillow squished under your hips to help keep them positioned up, after the long fucking that evening, you knew your knees wouldn’t be able to support your weight anymore. Then there was Sirius, positioned behind you, hands aggressively gripping your hips almost to the point of bruising, his hips frantically thrusting, cock pulsing in and out of your abused hole.

Your moans were spurring him on, completely unaware of your discomfort but this was your own fault, purposefully not telling him, wanting him to keep going. Of course, you were overdoing it, even getting to the point that your eyes were clenched shut in concentration, you didn’t care about the pain.

James and Remus were watching from the side, having already had their fill, James' cum dripping from your cunt, Sirius using it as lube for his own adventures and Remus’ glob dripped from your mouth, jaw aching from attempting to take his length as much as you could.

Both men were watching intently, their softened cocks already getting hard again from the sight before them. Remus silently shifted forward, trying to look at your face from where it hide, from the way you were just letting Sirius fuck you, he decided it was probably time to check in, knowing you’d already been through a lot that evening.

“Give me a minute Padfoot”, Remus muttered, squatting down in front of you.

Your only response was to groan with upset, attempting to roll your hips back against Sirius but he held you down easily with your lack of strength. The lycanthrope Marauder slipped his hand under your jaw, tilting it up at an awkward angle so that you could look into his eyes.

“Why are making him stop? It feels so good”, you sounded borderline pathetic, eyes dazed slightly.

Remus however did not seem at all convinced by your words that weren’t necessarily different to usual but it just seemed like he had an intuition, knowing you far too well. Tilting his head to the side, still studying your face intently, he asked, “Do you need to use your safe word?”

“No, no don’t stop”, once again, you attempted and failed to roll your hips. Remus’ fingers harden against your jaw, causing your eyes to sharpen at his serious expression. “Why are you making him stop? I’m fine”, you tried to sound convincing.

“Were you fine? Because you looked to me like you were in pain”, Remus stated matter-of-factly.

“No, it feels so good”, you tried to say. Remus only had to glance over your shoulder to Sirius, almost like they were having a silent conversation between themselves as Sirius dragged his cock an inch out of you, and the feeling of it against your sore walls gave you the automatic response to wince.

Instantly you regretted the action, with nowhere to hide your face, Remus and James had the perfect view to see your discomfort. “Wait, no- that… that wasn’t what you think it was, it still does feel good! Please don’t stop, I’m ok!”

Your panic was evident enough, knowing you’d been caught so rather than facing the truth, knowing you were hiding the pain from them, you tried to just carry on but by the sound of Remus’ heavy sigh, you knew you were in for it.

“I’m not doubting that it feels good but you KNOW you are supposed to tell us if it hurts and if we are going too far. This is why we have safe words”, Remus explained. You knew this, knew why these rules were there for your benefit but also for the boys, they didn’t want actually to cause you pain like this.

“But it’s not going too far, I don’t want Sirius to stop, please!”

Remus released his grip on your jaw and for a moment, your silly mind thought that Sirius was actually going to continue but he didn’t. In fact, he pulled his cock completely out of you which once more hurt and then his hands were pulling you further onto the bed and turning onto your back.

James was now hovering above you from where he sat at the top of the bed, holding down your wrists into the sheets, and Sirius did the same but with your ankles, the position causing your thighs to rub together which meant your cunt had no room to breathe, feeling uncomfortable.

However, your thoughts didn’t ponder on this for too long as the hulking form of Remus straddled over your hips, his naked body warm against yours. You were completely at their disposal being pinned down, especially as Remus's rough hand gripped your cheeks together, forcing you to look up at his intense stare.

“What are you supposed to do when you’re in pain and this goes too far?” he referred to the sex.

You tried to pull away, almost like warning alarms screaming in your consciousness, knowing what he was eventually getting to, now understanding how much you had fucked up.

However, the Marauder's grip was strong on your body and you were just wasting energy, feeling exhausted and giving up, knowing you wouldn’t be able to slither your way out of this. You whispered the answer to the most dominant Marauder who was waiting over your body.

“Excuse me? Answer me louder”, he demanded, still holding your cheeks, squishing them together so your lips formed an ‘o’ shape.

“I’m supposed to tell you or use my safe words”, the tone of your voice was evident that you were feeling defeated.

“Ah, so you do know what you are supposed to do. Now answer me honestly, are you in pain right now?”

In truth, you were in more pain than you’d realised now that you weren’t being fucked and the endorphins and adrenaline were wearing off. “A little bit…” you admitted to this, but still tried to downplay the situation.

“A little bit is still too far and you know it. Next question: should you have told us today that you’re in pain?” Remus continued to question you.

“Yes”, your voice was only just audible with its whisper as you began to feel anxious and sick, knowing exactly what was coming, especially with the intense way Remus looked down at you.

“Yes that’s right, so what do we do to naughty girls who don’t tell their partners that they are in pain?”

Now you’re struggling again, trying to cower away from him, sobbing as you shouted, “Remmie, please don’t-”.

“Hey!” he shouted with authority. “Enough of the whining, now answer my question.”

“They get punished”, once again defeated.

“Yes, they do. Because you were given a clear instruction and have chosen to ignore it so I need you to listen to me carefully”. You do exactly as instructed, relaxing your tense muscles and listening, knowing it was better to go along with it than make it any worse. But also, Sirius’ thumb was stroking soft circles into the skin of your ankle which helped the thundering of your heart in your chest. “Good, so you can follow instructions”, Remus mocked. “The safe word is still in place if this gets too much but, you need to understand why I am going to punish you. We have all of these set in place that when pain is becoming more than pleasure then you have to tell us because now, I’m sure you’re going to be sore for a few days and that’s not what we want, is it Pup?”

“No sir”, you reply submissively, eyes dropping down in defeat but he was quick to tilt your face up once more.

“Exactly. Now I want you to repeat back to me, why you are being punished before we start”.

A hot flush rushed through your body as the embarrassment set in as you had to recount why you were being punished. “Because I didn’t tell you to stop when it was starting to hurt”.

“Good”, Remus praised, his hard eyes softening ever so slightly which relaxed you even more but then his next words had your body feeling as if it had been doused in ice. “You are going to take 5 spanks from each of us then, you’ll be tied up and you are going to watch us. If you look away for even a second, we will start right at the beginning with the spanking. Then once we are done, you’re going to be a good girl and swallow each of our loads, do I make myself clear?”

You wanted to cry, not only were you being spanked which was humiliating in of itself, but now you had to watch each of them find their own release and satisfaction and then drink their rewards as you were left without any of your own. Your lack of response had James tapping against your wrists, snapping you out of your internal battle.

“Yes sir”.

Remus still continued to grasp your cheeks, dropping his authoritative stance to lean down to kiss your forehead. You could still use your safe words, you knew they wouldn’t actually push you so far but it was important for you to understand these situations had repercussions. You’d only ever been punished twice throughout your relationship with the trio and they understood that this was a big deal for you to go through, always wanting to make them happy and never wishing to upset them. On a few occasions, they had threatened to punish and you had used your safe words so you knew you could do it now but you decided to go along with it instead.

Not wanting to add anything further to your punishment, something the boys knew you were very good at as you were completely submissive to your core, you helped to move into position.

Remus sat on the edge of the bed, feet flat against the floor as you lay across his lap, feeling his strong thighs beneath your stomach, your arse presented to him like a gift in front of him. Your cunt still hurt from this position as your legs remained closed.

James noticed your visible discomfort and swiftly sat next to Remus, easing under your head so it now lay in his lap, his magical fingers stroking against your scalp helping to keep you relaxed. Sirius did the same, but had your legs lying across his lap, massaging the muscles to also feel somewhat at ease but as Remus lay his hand on your lower back, the reality of the situation returned.

“Are you going to count for me?” Remus asked, his voice a great deal softer than it had been a moment ago.

“Yes sir”.

Then he began. His large hand smacked against your left arse cheek and even though you knew it was coming, it still caused your to jump, thankful that all three of them were there to keep you on their laps. The impact stung as you bite your lip to hide the whimper before remembering your job, “one, sir.”

Remus continued with his spanks, remaining in the same spot on your left cheek, each one causing the skin to heat and jiggle, a sight all three men admired hungrily. As you took the fifth spank, Remus smothered the skin, squeezing the area and making sure to praise you, “Well done my love, you took them so well, counted each one perfectly”.

His words drifted into your mind and made you feel happy and safe, enjoying the momentary joy before the bodies beneath were swapping so James was in the middle, your arse on his lap with Remus cradling your head.

The quidditch-playing Marauder began to then spank your right cheek, but his hands were so big that they grazed over the sore area left by Remus, causing more stinging. However, this didn’t stop your counting, physically having to say the words helped to keep your consciousness present, knowing if you didn’t talk, you could just lose yourself to the punishment.

By the fifth smack to your arse and tenth overall, you were beginning to feel slightly buzzed, adrenaline returning to pump through your veins causing you to feel lightheaded and almost floaty. Remus stroked his thumb against your face, noticing your eyes were glazing over, tears threatening to spill.

This didn’t stop them, knowing when you were at your breaking point and when you were just feeling a little bit subspacey. Sirius now stared down at your spanked arse in his lap, enjoying the slightly raised skin from the impacts but also feeling just how drenched you were, your juices coating your thighs.

“Do you need to use your words, sweetheart?” Sirius asked softly as you began to silently cry.

“No”, you whispered with a wobbly lip, “sir”, you added quickly.

“My sweet girl, you’re doing so well, five more to go, you can do it”, Sirius praised before swatting his hand through the air and smacking the area where your arse cheek met your thigh, the exact space that you could be sitting on, his favourite spot.

You were slightly thankful for him choosing a different spot, your arse already feeling tender as you continued to count Sirius’ five spanks which added up to fifteen overall. This new area however caused your thighs to clench automatically which only meant that it squeezed your swollen cunt.

Remus caught each of your tears with the pad of his thumb but you knew you still looked like an absolute mess. Especially from between your legs as you were sure there was a wet patch forming on Sirius’ thighs from your still evident arousal, even through all the pain, the pleasure was still rampant.

Finally, after what felt like hours, you were rushing out the words, “Five, sir”. You were grateful for the spanks being over, trying to nuzzle your flushed face into Remus’ hands. You jumped slightly however as Sirius leaned down to kiss the burning hot skin of your ass, praising, “You did so so well honey”.

His erection throbbed under your stomach as he looked down at your pathetic state and you wished for nothing more than to stroke and touch it, momentarily forgetting that this wasn’t the end of your punishment.

Sirius didn’t however as he wrapped his strong arms around your middle, manhandling you up and further up the bed, you bounced on your sensitive arse a few times from where he placed you by the headboard. James then waved his wand in the direction of your arms and legs, wordlessly magically wrapping invisible string around your libs, causing them to extend and stretch to each of the bed posts.

You cried more now at the realisation that your punishment was nowhere near over and not entirely comfortable, still sitting on your sore ass. You also missed the warmth that had once surrounded you.

“Shhh, it’s ok love”, James encouraged, giving you a sad smile, tilting your head back to look up into his hazel eyes. He looked like he wanted to kiss you but refrained from doing so, showing too much praise and softness wasn't until the end of your punishment.

But then he was moving away, his messy hair bouncing as you watched him join the other two at the end of the bed and away from you.

Each of their cocks was hard and pointing up with the blood pumping hard through them and your eyes drifted between each of them, your tears slowing with the distraction.

Then Sirius was tugging James back by his hips, towards his own body until James' back and Sirius’ chest met and the long-haired Marauder’s mouth attached to the side of the other man’s neck. The muscles over both of their bodies flex with the instant arousal, James tilting his head further to give Sirius the room to move up and down, leaving open-mouthed kisses.

You didn’t look away, even in your spaced-out mind, something reminded you to not look away, not wishing to be spanked again. But it was also near-torturous watching the three of them, with the way your legs were spread wide, you weren’t able to roll your hips forward to relieve any of the tension in your clit, or rub your thighs together.

Sirius tweaked James’ perked nipples, causing the man to groan, turning his hand back so they could kiss, both mouths opening on instinct to allow their tongues to dance and twist together. The sight was almost hypnotic with how beautiful they all looked, especially as Remus moved closer to join from beside James.

Fuck, you were feeling almost desperate with arousal now, feeling fuzzy mentally and your chest had an unsettling tightness within with the need to be involved. But also, your horniness continued to cause your aching, swollen cunt to clench around nothing meaning you were absolutely drenched.

Remus’ grip encircled James’ veiny member that had beads of pre-cum already dripping from the tip, staining the sheets. The touch had James thrusting automatically, wanting to feel the pressure wrapped around him more. James moaned loudly, hungrily almost as he pulled back from Sirius’ mouth, but only so he could grab the back of Remus’ head to meet his mouth in a passionate kiss.

Sirius then started to wank himself off, teeth grazing along the exposed length of James’ neck. Remus was then moving off of James’ mouth to whisper something into his ear and you wished more than anything to hear what he said as the next second James’ eyes were flicking to yours, filled with pure lust.

A whimper slipped out of your mouth at the view, but you held your tongue for the pleas threatening to come out. You knew begging would get you nothing that you’d wanted as the first time you had ever been punished, you’d thrashed against the restraints, begging so much that your throat was raw for days and you’d practically passed out from exhaustion by the time the three of them had found their satisfaction.

So, you didn’t want to waste your energy, not that you had much of it left anyway after the fucking session that day or the spanking. Instead, you watched, biting your tongue to hold back the words you wanted to say and beg for.

Your eye contact with James swiftly broke as the man was suddenly pushed forward by Sirius who was on his knees behind, hands running up and down James’ toned back before cupping the arse perked in the air beneath him.

“So fucking pretty Prongs”, Sirius complimented, admiring the man’s body. James shifted his hips closer to Sirius who was now distracted as Remus climbed off of the bed and stood behind Sirius, hands running up and down his chest before gripping his long hair and pulling harshly to expose his ear.

Remus then whispered something to Sirius whose eyes rolled back to match his aggressive groan before nodding, opening his eyes fully to look down at James who was still waiting patiently on his hands and knees.

Sirius's mouth opened so he could spit down, aiming for James’ asshole, watching the glob gleam against the eagerly awaiting hole. Reaching down with his thumb, Sirius brushed against it, applying a little bit of pressure but not enough yet to slip inside.

James looked over his shoulder towards Sirius, “Fuck, I need you right now, I can take it Padfoot”, he begged.

Sirius raised a single eyebrow as he finally applied more pressure to the hole, feeling it expanding, “you really think you can take me without any prep?”

“Yes!” James then pushed back his hips, causing Sirius’ thumb to slip inside, all three men groaned, and Remus watched over Sirius’ shoulders and whispered something again.

“I’ll go slow”, Sirius stated, nodding at what Remus instructed, shifting on his knees closer ever so slightly and then guiding his cock to James' awaiting hole. Sirius spat again and wiped it over his cock, placing a steady hand on James’ hip to keep him steady and then he was slipping his cock in.

You watched as they both groaned in pure ecstasy, and you wanted nothing more to be feeling how they both felt right now.

Sirius managed to keep his slow thrusts for a couple of minutes, aware of not hurting James but the messy-haired Marauder was already rolling his hips back, attempting to increase the speed, enjoying the slight burn that came with the stretch of Sirius’ cock. This caused the man to lose all restraints and he began to mercilessly fuck the man beneath him. James gripped the sheets hard, his forehead resting on the sheets as his moans sounded pornographic, deep and husky.

The sight was beautiful but it was even more erotic as Sirius was gently pushed forward a little bit as Remus had his own plan as his fingers rested over his arse, watching the muscles clench with each thrust.

Your eyes didn’t know where to look between the three of your boyfriends before settling on Sirius whose eyes were wide, lips shiny with plumped from the kissing. His hips slowed as he felt Remus touch him from behind, nodding at the silent question being asked before Remus began gently easing two fingers into Sirius’ hole.

The thrusting completely stopped as Sirius grunted at the feeling of James’ hole wrapped around his cock and the two fingers stretching in his hole, grazing lazily over his prostate. His beautiful face tilted back at the pleasure, exposing his throat that Remus wrapped a strong hand around, keeping him still as he added a third finger.

“Do you want me to, Padfoot?” Remus asked loudly enough for everyone to hear. You wanted desperately to say you wanted him too but only released a small mewling whimper, still holding your tongue but the noise was enough for Remus’ eyes to flick to yours, his mouth quipping up into a smirk at how desperate you looked.

“Yes, Moony, please fuck me already”, Sirius sounded desperate as he widened his thighs on the bed, helping his cheeks to spread as Remus pulled his fingers out and lined himself up having spread his own precum over his cock, using it as lube.

Not even a second later, the three of them were joined. Remus stood behind the bed, his cock delved into Sirius’ asshole, whose face was scrunched in concentration, trying not to move Remus’ fat cock stretch him wide, whilst Sirus’ own cock was still warm inside of James’ asshole.

Eventually, the three of them began to rock back and forth on the bed, finding a rhythm that suited them best.

You were absolutely fucked out of your mind watching them all, usually, this sight would be your favourite but right now it was the worst punishment imaginable. Your cunt was swollen, throbbing with need and leaking your juices over the sheets and your arms and legs ached from being held out in the outstretched position, all you wanted to do was feel as good as them.

With ease and grace, the three men moved together, long limbs gripping onto each other, their low grunts like music to your ears, seeing the pleasure writhe on their expressions. Knowing the pleasure wasn’t something you were doing only added to the punishment, wishing that you were the one sucking their cocks, touching them, fucking them and making them feel good and it was only intensified by the subspace you were in mentally.

What was worst, was that other than the occasional glance that you’d experienced, the three of them completely ignored you, even though James wasn’t that far away from you, he never made the move to touch you. It was awful, letting you watch the three of them, even though you were highly aroused and wanting nothing more from their touch. It was a part of your punishment, you deserved this, they looked like they were having lots of fun without you, did they even need you?

The thoughts had your eyes now glassy with tears but you tried not to let them fall, they didn’t need a crying girl watching them fuck, so you remained silent.

Sirius was nearly overstimulated with the intense pleasure he was feeling with both his cock and prostate being stroked, it felt so fucking good, especially as Remus intensified his thrusts which he used as his own momentum to then fuck into James.

“Fuck! Just like that, right there…”, Sirius cried out over his shoulder as Remus gripped onto the back of his neck, using the hold to tilt his cock slightly so he could directly fuck into his pleasure spot.

“Yes! Yes! Yes- Fuck I’m gonna cum”, Sirius suddenly revealed.

It all happened in a blue. One minute you were watching the three of them fuck and the next, James was being pushed further onto the bed and Remus was helping Sirius stand up on the mattress, walking over James’ body until he stood over you. With one hand, he tipped your head back and the other gripped the base of his cock as it pulsed and throbbed.

It was on instinct that your mouth dropped open, completely forgetting about this part of your punishment as Sirius’ cum began spurting out, most of it dripping into your awaiting mouth as he watched eagerly, only a few drops collecting on your chin.

The tears you were keeping at bay began to slip down your warm cheeks, feeling humiliated as you swallowed his load and then licked his fingers clean as he scooped up the drops you’d missed. You hated this, hated that you were left to drink their reward whilst you were there without any sort of gratification.

“Look so pretty when you cry Darling”, Sirius whispered, his own cheeks rosy as he breathed heavily. For a second, he wiped away your tears before a moan sounded from behind him, causing him to jump off of the bed and sit in a nearby chair to watch the rest of the show.

This gave you the view of James who had been dragged down the bed by Remus and turned onto his back before he was leaning over him and hungrily kissing him. Both of their hands roamed over each other's bodies, exploring one another as their hips thrust together, cocks rubbing and bumping into one another.

James made the move first to reach in between their bodies, pushing Remus’ cock lower towards his awaiting hole and Remus didn’t waste another second before he was thrusting forward.

“That’s it, you’re taking me so well Prongs”, Remus praised the man beneath him, feeling his hole stretch the limit around his girthy member. Just like Sirius had, Remus began slow but soon wasn’t holding back, fucking hand and fast enough that the bed was shaking with the movements, rocking your body as well.

“Fuck, don’t stop!” James suddenly groaned as Remus wrapped his hand around his cock that was still throbbing between them, his wrist moving in time with his thrust.

Once your tears had started, you couldn’t stop them from falling now in jealousy and desperately watching them both, wanting nothing more to bed for them to just look at you, to acknowledge that you were even there, to get them to touch you but still, you wanted to be a good girl so refrained from doing this.

Remus's hair stuck to his forehead as he fucked James hard and it wasn’t that much longer before the man beneath him was shouting, “Wait, stop moony!”

Then he was scrambling to his feet on the bed, legs wobbling slightly as he now stood over you, hand moving up and down his shaft as your mouth dropped open in time to drink down his cum.

Your eyes drank in every little detail about James from his even messier hair than usual, the way his abs clenched with each spurt and the salty taste of his loads as it coated your tongue and this time, you managed to catch it all.

James smiled kindly down at you but didn’t get the chance to touch you as he was gently moved out of the way, stepping down to join Sirius at the side, as Remus now stood over you.

You held his eye contact, jaw aching as you held your mouth open submissively as he began to toss himself off. From this position, you could see his cock gleaming in the low light of the room, with what was Sirius and James’ natural body juices. The grip he held strengthed as it moved faster, his eyes glancing down at the wet patch that had formed between your legs and on the sheets blow.

“You look so pretty, Pup”, Remus’s voice was thick with arousal, using the nickname he only called you, causing your heart to beat harder in your chest as he finally spoke to you. This distracted you a little from the situation but then as something warm began to fill your mouth, you tried to concentrate on not choking, quickly having to swallow as his cum completely filled your mouth.

With a full body shudder, Remus’s last drop of cum spurted from his tip and another swallow later, he was finished, shoulders dropping releasing a heavy sigh in relief.

Remus then knelt between your legs, gripping your cheeks, much like he’d done earlier, holding your attention. “Do you understand why you’ve been punished?”

“Yes, sir.” Your voice was timid, tears still cascading down your cheeks. You were completely and utterly submissive.

“Good girl”. He released the grip on your cheeks and began to stroke the aching muscle instead but you were quick to nuzzle into his hand, wanting to feel any sort of comfort. “My sweet girl, you did so well”.

“I did?” you asked, your eyes and voice filling with hope at making him happy.

“You did! Not even begging once did you? I’m so proud of you”, Remus encouraged. You could have cried more at the praises, almost like what he said was sacred it was just what you needed. “What do you want my love?” Remus finally asked, his eyes softened as he looked at you.

“I…I want you all”, you finally sobbed, pulling on your invisible restraints. Remus motioned for James and Sirius to step forward, both of them holding their wands and waving them, releasing your limbs from the bonds.

With nothing to hold up your body, you instantly were slumping forward into Remus who was able to ease you into his lap, your head resting against his chest as the other two men sat on either side, beginning to massage your sore muscles.

Their skin was hot to the touch but that only helped you to relax further. “Oh love, you’re so wet”, Remus mumbled, feeling the evidence of your arousal over your thighs which now coated his from where you sat. “How much does it hurt?” he asked, referring to in between your legs.

You wanted to lie and say it didn’t anymore, wanting to feel their cocks but you knew you couldn’t, having already received one punishment.

“It…it still hurts, but I’m so horny, I don’t know what do you!”, you were near hysterics with how desperate you were feeling, it felt like your core was incredibly heavy with tautness, desperate for relief but your actual cunt was still tender.

Remus began to steadily rock the two of you on the spot as James lay sweet kisses to your temple. You leaned into the feeling, savouring the sensation as each of them kissed a part of your body but it wasn’t enough.

“Please…”.

“Shhh Pup, I’m going to try and touch you but if it hurts you need to say”, Remus suggested, brushing his fingers over your stomach and between your thighs. It was only a gentle touch to your clit but even that caused burning hot sparks of pain, enough so that you flinched and tried to pull your hips away from him on instinct.

“That’s ok, I’m not going to touch you”, Remus calmly stated, kissing your temple and looking towards Sirius for some help.

Sirius leaned over to kiss your moist cheek, his hand gripped tightly in his hand as he muttered, “Im going to make you feel good Sweetheart”.

You weren’t entirely sure what he meant but then he was pointing his wand at your cunt, whispering a spell under his breath and it was almost an instantaneous reaction.

Your pussy tightened and you were cumming with one of the most intense orgasms you’d ever experienced. Aggressively rocking your hips with each shuddering contracting of your spasming, swollen cunt, nails harshly dripping into whoever you had grabbed. White lights flashed in your vision and finally, you were feeling that orgasmic high, even without being touched.

You were only half aware that you’d begun screaming, head slipping off Remus’ shoulder as you began dizzy and lightheaded. The feeling then began to fade as Sirius stopped the spell, you weren’t even sure how long it had been going on for but by the time your cunt had stopped squeezing around nothing, you were struggling to breathe through the intensity.

“Nice long breaths, that’s it, we’ve got you, Love”, Remus's voice spoke from next to your ears as he cradled your body. It took several minutes to even gather a single lucid thought that made sense, mostly just aware that you were mentally and physically drained.

The subspace you’d been in was still at the forefront of your consciousness, needing to feel all three of them, listening to their words of affirmation.

“Let’s get you up before you completely pass out”, James suggested, seeing your eyes dropping. The three of them helped you to the bathroom, mostly having to carry you as your legs didn’t seem to want to work after being fucked, punished, and then the intense orgasm.

In the bathroom, they helped you to the toilet before the four of you bathed, and you moaned greatly to the hot, soapy water that mellowed your aching body.

“I love you”, you whispered to all three of them.

“We love you too, Pup”, Remus mumbled against your temple before helping you out of the bath, wrapping your naked body in a fluffy towel, and carefully drying your body. James was then next to you, helping you into your favourite pair of fluffy pyjamas, making sure the shorts weren’t too tight to give your pussy space to still breathe and heal.

Helping you back into bed, the wet stains now vanished thanks to Sirius, you all but collapsed into the centre of the bed, half aware that someone shifted beneath you and other arms were wrapping around you in a strong cocoon. You weren’t sure who was where as you fell asleep within seconds but you knew you felt grounded and whole.