#jack is not impressed

[doththymayo]

Davey: Alright, so we all know that somebody lit Jack's car on fire–

Jack: And that somebody is named Spot.

Davey: And we don't know who it is...

Jack: I do. It was Spot.

Davey: So we can't really blame anybody at this point...

Jack: Uh, I can and I blame Spot.

Davey: So, for now that will have to remain... a mystery.

Jack: Um, mystery solved!

Jack: Spot burnt up my fucking car.

[pigdemonart]

Oops 😬

Just some thoughts after watching the movie heheh. Nothing here is a spoiler though! Its mostly just Bowser’s demeanor HAHA

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[skullism]

rereading aftg and realising just how oblivious neil was is truly hilarious

just a few pages ago renee told neil andrew is gay and neil literally had to lie down to process it, now he's admitting he watches andrew at the gym and is impressed by how much he lifts??? dude. you are down SO bad

[newvision]

Will answering “part of me will always want to” when Jack asks him if he’ll slip away with Hannibal is actually an insane thing to say cause at any other point during the show before that episode Jack would not have wanted Will to get this close to Hannibal. But now he needs him to!!!!!!!!!!!!! So he is forced to accept the part of Will that is fascinated by the very reason Hannibal is supposed to go to prison, his cruelty & violence, and therefore also that part of Hannibal. Will might as well have said “I wanna eat people with this guy and that’s the very reason why you need me to help you”. And the next scene is him being petty and jealous towards Hannibal’s wife. How did Jack not quit after one single day of working this case

[grimark]

i love how in the first two seasons of doctor who, Mickey Smith, regular human guy who i am led to believe works as a car mechanic, has absolutely unparalleled hacking skills just whenever the plot requires it. first time it happened it was bc the doctor gave him the top secret UNIT password that lets any random dickhead with a laptop fire a missile out of a submarine directly at london. but all on his own he's casually clicked his way into high security military databases at least twice since then. if you were a character on a tv show in the 2000s, just knowing how to turn a computer on was enough to give you hacker superpowers.

[asfodeltide]

[versias]

Demon Twins AU

- Maddie was trained by the League of Assassins and was sent back to America to pursue her theory that Lazarus water was ectoplasmic residue. She joined the only paranormal studies course in the country and met likeminded scientists Jack Fenton and Vlad Masters.

- Maddie fell in love with Jack and they pursued their research together, attempting to break into the “ghost zone”, the hypothetical in-between where the energy of death collected in order to collect pure ectoplasm samples. (And possibly capture a ghost for study.)

- They Sort-Of succeeded (sorry Vlad but science marches on) and Maddie proved ectoplasm and Lazarus water were related. LoA allowed her to stay and continue her research, providing her with funding so long as she sent reports. Occasionally she had to do a mission since she was in the area, but it was usually simple and low stakes.

- Then, when Jazz is 2 years old, Maddie is called back to the League to witness the birth of the Demon’s Heirs. The babies were grown in LW using her data so she basically has to become a physician for the babies.

- The younger twin’s heart stopped when he was pulled out of the water. She rushed to save him, using pure ectoplasm from her research and it worked. Even though Danyal is deemed the inferior twin, he’s kept alive and trained to act as a benchmark/motivation for the true heir Damian.

- Maddie falls in love with the little boy whose health she’s in charge of. Talia notes that this researcher cares for her child as if it was her own.

- When Ra’s decides to have Danny and Damian duel as a sort of initiation and trial to prove his worth as the heir (something that leaves psychological scars on both Danny and Damian, thanks Ra’s.), Damian kills Danny and Maddie is devastated over the body.

- Talia grabs her and the body and sneaks them into the Lazarus pits to bring her child back. Then she hands Danny to Maddie and tells her to raise him as her own, protect him as her own, and she will erase Maddie’s debt to the league.

- Maddie runs with her new son back to America and tells her family that the job she had is completed and “hey Jack sorry I forgot to mention our son I was so caught up in my work! Yeah, whenever I visited five years ago I got pregnant and forgot to mention it! Whoopsie daisy!”

- Jack believes this because he’s forgetful sometimes and also why would his lovely, beautiful, brilliant wife lie to him. He welcomes five year old Danny into his life as his son despite him only superficially looking like him and for some reason having much darker skin. Who knows, genetics isn’t his area of expertise!

- Besides even if Maddie lied to him she probably had a good reason! He’s always wanted a son anyway!!

- Jazz is far more suspicious of this but she’s all of seven and also this poor kid looks terrified and traumatized so. She’ll let it go. And also help him settle in, as is right for a Big Sister.

- Danny has psychological and physical scars but grows up loved and cared for. He misses his brother, but he wasn’t worthy to stand beside him—grandfather said so and it must be so. He didn’t want to be a weight on his brother’s neck, dragging him down

- He makes friends with Tucker and then Sam who don’t judge him for strange mannerisms and who like him for who he is.

- Maybe it’s not the life he would have chosen for himself, but it is a good life. He decides he can be happy here in Amity Park, secure in the knowledge that his brother was off conquering and thriving.

- Then Maddie and Jack finish the Portal, which would theoretically allow travel into the Ghost Zone to continue their work. The pinhole fractures they can now reliably create to power weapons and technology prove the theory and this is the next step!

- Danny Dies In The Portal and a hole is ripped open between worlds. DP series takes place as normal!

- Mixed Reveal since Maddie and Jack are researchers first and foremost. They don’t want to hurt their children but they want to study! They capture a different ghost so they can learn more about how the anatomy works, because they need to take care of their half-ghost son.

- Danny is appalled and horrified to find them dissecting some struggling specter. They are so fucking earnest about it, trying to tell him that they want to make sure they understand how he’s put together so if he gets hurt they can help and it’s not like they can Kill ghosts so it’s only a temporary necessity in pursuit of knowledge!!

- Danny releases the ghost and later, steals their research and destroys the portal. He flees. He knows they won’t hurt him but he thought they wouldn’t Do That either and they did so he’s terrified.

- Danny’s friends help him escape and set up a fake id and passport. His plan is to get to Gotham and find the Bat who will hopefully be able to Adult this situation. He’s not expecting to be welcomed as his son; by all accounts the Batman has no idea Talia even made children with his DNA so he isn’t even going to mention being his son.

- Meanwhile Damian has been Robin for four years and slowly adjusting to his new normal. He doesn’t think about his dead brother; he isn’t allowed to, and though he’s left the league, the league has not left him entirely.

- He is patrolling with his father when an unknown teenager flags them down. Batman is suspicious of course but the kid seems to be earnestly calling for help. He has Robin hang back out of caution and approaches the unknown himself.

- Holy Fuck He Looks Like Damian

- He doesn’t act like a clone or anything. He has an impressively obvious midwestern accent and uses slang like a typical teen. He tells him, a little hysterically, about his parents being scientists and the fucking portal to hell they opened in their basement, about finding them experimenting on an inter-dimensional being that may or may not be an actual human spirit, and briefly details taking his sisters car across four states in a manic road trip to find the Batman.

- Batman is like, why me? There are closer heroes. Why not call the justice league hotline?

- “Hoo boy Mr. Batman see the thing is Amity Park is Dangerous and full of ghosts so I didn’t want metas showing up where they’d get overshadowed and I’d have to? Like? Fight a possessed Superman or something.”

- Why would you be the one fighting??

- Danny is impressively bad at keeping his mouth shut about secrets but to be fair, he’s meeting his father for the first time and the Batman is super cool and intimidating and also he’s remembering his mom and his brother and that’s reminding him of his new family and how everything has probably irreparably fallen apart and oh no

- Oh no he’s crying in front of Batman. Oh fuck, he’s sobbing in front of his father and this is his first impression. Oh ancients he’s never gonna want anything to do with Danny after this mess and it’s not like he was going to say anything but apparently there was this small hope at the bottom of his heart that he’d be welcomed and loved. That somehow his Father would just know this was his son and hug him and make everything better.

- Batman is awkwardly trying to decide if he wants to risk hugging a dangerous unknown, unstable possible-meta-adjacent teenager while he’s having a breakdown on a rooftop when Robin lands next to him and says something that freezes the blood in Bruce’s veins:

- “Brother?”

[thebusylilbee]

jack harkness' arc is so fucking insane honestly... the guy is literally comic relief most of the time just out there throwing dirty jokes and winking at everything that moves, meanwhile his canon storyline is that his blond lady friend who was heartbroken at seeing him die absorbed The Time Vortex - that no human should ever absorb - which gave her supernatural powers that made her able to bring him back before she had to be saved BUT... she could not control those powers properly so she brought him back permanently and so he can no longer die but he keeps aging ! and he's aware of that contradiction and he asks the only other seemingly immortal being he knows about it in a way that makes it obvious that he's really fucking worried about it but that being looks him in the eyes and admits he fears what he has become and tells him he honestly has no idea what's gonna happen to him so he just has to like.. fake smile and keep on going. and then what that alien doesn't tell him is that he knows he's gonna live for another 5 BILLION YEARS and age into something entirely unrecognizable to anyone in the universe before he is finally allowed to die. like wow. that sure is the fucking comic relief right there !

[whumpninja]

Can’t shake off the idea of Whumper comforting Whumpee after they hurt them, telling them sweet things like “it’s okay” and “it’s over” and “you did so good.” And Whumpee being so confused and scared that they lean into it, accept it, because at this point it’s the only source of comfort they’re going to get.

[suntails]

out of context wip spoilers for my current project

[doththymayo]

Mush: Wow, that’s your friend?!

Spot: Why the tone of surprise?

Mush: Nothing, just that Racetrack's so bubbly and you’re so... so...

Spot, threateningly: So what?

Mush: Uhhh– Also bubbly! And really really nice! And… 

Spot: And?

Mush: And really good at giving compliments!

Mush: Jack, remember the time Spot complimented you?

Jack: You mean the time Medda made us say one nice thing about each other and Spot said I “have hair”?

Spot, deadpan: You do have hair.

[bisexualmultifandommess]

I don’t know why some people find it weird that Donna makes sure to mention different pronouns about the Captain in Wild Blue Yonder lmao

She literally has a trans child so has spent a lot of Rose’s life since she came out and started transitioning educating herself on correct pronouns so it’s probably natural to Donna to immediately switch to make sure she’s including other pronouns. Since she’s so supportive and protective of Rose I’d find it strange if she didn’t correct herself on pronouns.

Also Doctor Who has always been Queer I don’t know if you have been living under a rock but it’s not just a random new thing that started happening this year or have we all forgotten Jack as a character in 2005??

[naughtydogg]

this is too cute. chace is precious

[macksartblock]

I got my non-dndads friend to try the peachyville horror and this is basically what happened

[starlightwoofwoof]

GUYS I’VE GOT MORE HEROES FOR MY SM X MLB AU-

here’s hero Jack and John, Honey Stinger and Sheriff Slither :D

and here’s a silly thing lol

[jubileepizza]

Truthfully I don’t think ianto jones even had a thing for suits, at least not initially. In his attempts at seducing his way into a job he tested a variety of clothing and it was the suit which finally got results. Jack had a thing for (ianto in) suits.