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23victoria · 6 months ago

Text

Passing the Phone

f1 grid x reader

warnings: cussing, unhinged, satire, complete jokes (are they?...), dark humor ig…idk, talk of age gaps, sa allegations, no just kidding...very much reading people to the filth

authors note: lmaoo don’t ask me why i wrote this cause idk…but this is so unhinged 😭😭 please don’t take offense to this and if you do…i said don’t…all jokes i love them, some of them, you can find it funny or you won’t, just wanted to get this out of my drafts

want to be tagged in my works?! CLICK HERE!

f1 masterlist

Video starts with Y/N holding the phone, in selfie mode.

Y/N: I'm passing the phone to someone who had the biggest breakup in F1 history with a blond German boy named Nico.

Lewis: Babe, no!

Y/N: What, too soon? It's been years but okay! Sorry! Okay, let me start again. I'm passing the phone to someone who said "Fuck Mercedes" and is going to Ferrari for 2025!

Lewis: Y/N, no!! You cannot say that! You’re gonna get me in trouble!!

Y/N: Fine, fine, fine. I'm passing the phone to the GOAT of this generation with the most wins in F1 history, yet he was robbed of the championship in 2021.

Y/N passes the phone to Lewis.

Lewis: stares at Y/N then laughs “I'm passing the phone to someone who is known more for his memes than driving skills.”

Lewis passes the phone to George.

George: laughs “Hahaha real funny…I'm passing the phone to someone who took six years to get their first win."

Lando: “Dude, what the fuck?! Fuck you, Woody! I'm passing the phone to someone who's younger than me yet acts years older than me.”

Oscar: “....You're not funny... I'm passing the phone to someone who's most likely losing their seat next season.”

Logan: “The fuck, Oscar! I thought we were friends! Low blow, mate. I'm passing the phone to someone who has yet to get P1, yet all his friends who got into F1 after him have won races already.”

Alex: “....And that, Logan, is why you're losing your seat. Mr. What The Fuck is A Kilometer. Anyway, I'm passing the phone to someone who just got brutally murdered by an interviewer on Sky Sports regarding their F1 career, if you could call it that.”

Daniel: “You shouldn’t be talking Mr. I Have No Wins….eat shit…I'm passing the phone to the shortest person on the grid but cusses more than anyone here.”

Yuki: “That interviewer was right, why the fuck do you still have a seat in F1?!! Dickhead. I'm passing the phone to a man with good fashion sense and his teammate might steal his seat.”

Zhou: “Bro….really. I'm passing the phone to someone who acts like he's Australian when he’s not…oh, and his seat is at risk too.”

Bottas: “Yeah, yeah, whatever mate. I'm passing the phone to someone who has enough penalties in just nine races that he can be banned from racing in F1… permanently.

Kevin: “You're so funny, Bottas, hahaha…ha. I'm passing the phone to a dickhead.”

Nico: “Fuck you too asshole. I'm passing the phone to a person who has a shitty ass dad who deserves to be in jail.”

Max: burst out laughing “Ah, no lies told there. I'm passing the phone to someone who only has a seat to protect me from having any real competition…”

You laugh in the background “Oh shit.”

Checo: blank stare “Motherfucker! That just shows your true colors... I'm passing the phone to... who am I supposed to pass it to... uhhh... Y/N.

Takes phone

Y/N: “Oh, I know! I'm passing the phone to someone who has sexual assault “allegations” against them, but the FIA wants to hide it. I can’t go near him for my safety, so I’ll just turn the camera towards him... *pans the camera to Christian Horner*

Everyone is stunned and silent, then there’s Lewis laughing in the background

Y/N: “Oh! I have another one! Hey Kelly, “i hear you like them young”, to be more specific at the ripe age of 17... mhmmm, she's a pedoo. What Kendrick say “TRYNA STRIKE A CORD AND ITS PROBABLY A MINNORRRR” *pans the camera to Kelly Piquet*

silence.

Lewis: runs towards Y/N and grabs the camera “Yup, that's enough for today. You're trying to start problems and get people beat up”

Video ends with Lewis taking the phone away from Y/N, shaking his head while laughing.

.•☆.°.•.*₊ ☆ .*₊ .• ☆.°.• .

✿ .° • everything taglist • °. ✿ : @ham1lton @ietss @animeandf1lover @nelly187 @heartsfromtaeyong @bloodyymaryyy @nor-4 @zacian117 @mel164 @uhhvictoria @hadidsworld @magixpracticality @exotic-iris13 @tellybearryyyy @zabwlky1999 @sya-skies @lillysbigwilly

@eoduuung

.•☆.°.•.*₊ ☆ .*₊ .• ☆.°.• .

*sooooo……that’s the end….LMFAOOOO, again…DO NOT COME FOR ME…ITS JOKES (is it really though)*

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ellecdc · 8 months ago

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HIII!!!!!!!!! first off i wanna say - I LOVEEEEE ALLLLLLLL THE RECENT WORKS SM i came back and i was reading through them and they're soooooo good ur so talented omgomomg

ok so request (take ur time if u want!!) idk if u write platonic fics but i really really love how u write barty and that one fic where reader and reg were fighting and she was bsfs with barty- i loved it smmmmm so can we please get some platonic barty x reader being the main focus? (i dont mind anyyy romantic pairings i just want best friend barty being absolutely insane plsplsplpslsl

of course MY LOVE; this request is from back in March hahaha sorry

poly!moonwater x fem!reader who they find in bed with Barty

CW: fluff, swearing

Regulus had spent the last umpteen years believing himself to be a light sleeper, likely thanks to growing up in a house straight out of a muggle horror film where his fight or flight reflexes were always at the ready to flee from any danger. It appeared, though, that being, like, loved by and feeling safe with the people you surround yourself with could do wonders to a person’s subconscious…

Who knew?

This meant that though Regulus was typically a light sleeper, he seemed to have slept through your departure from his bed in the Slytherin boys’ dormitory.

Unfortunately, he wasn’t able to sleep through the sudden jolt Remus caused in the bed as he sat up and began panickedly feeling around the bed.

“What’re you doing?” Regulus groaned as he pulled his pillow over his head and rolled onto his side in order to point his back towards his - currently skating-on-thin-ice - boyfriend.

“Where’s dovey?” Remus hissed back; an urgent quality taking over his words that Regulus could tell it was far too early to be dealing with.

“What d’you mean?”

Remus groaned in exasperation as he cast a lumos with his wand. “I mean where is our girlfriend, you sod.”

“Have you checked with Barty?”

Regulus almost allowed sleep to pull him back into its sweet, sweet embrace before Remus ruined it again.

“What?”

“Barty, Remus. Have you checked with Barty?” Regulus repeated irritably.

“No? What? Why would I have checked with Junior?” Remus sputtered, though his asinine question was answered by none other than Barty himself.

“Finders keepers mother fuckers.” He snickered quietly.

Remus ripped open the curtain of Regulus’ four poster bed in the Slytherin dungeons to see you sleeping quite peacefully on the opposite side of Barty who was grinning arrogantly at your two boyfriends.

“What!?”

“She was too hot over there; I can feel the heat radiating off of you from here, Lupin. What the fuck is that about?”

“She could have taken a blanket off!” Remus argued petulantly.

“You kept tucking her back in saying she was going to catch a cold.” Regulus added helpfully sleepily.

Barty snickered at Remus’ disbelieving scoff.

“No. Absolutely not; Junior, give me our girlfriend back.” He demanded.

This time it was Barty’s turn to scoff. “Would you shut the fuck up, Lupin; we’re trying to sleep over here.”

And to Remus’s absolute horror, you seemed to stir at the conversation causing you to reach an arm over Barty’s chest and rest your head on his shoulder before you settled back into a restful slumber.

“Leave her be, Rem.” Regulus chided, causing Remus to divert his malcontented glare to his boyfriend.

“I beg your pardon?”

“You’re always going on and on about how we need to prioritize sleep; she’s doing that.” He explained simply.

“With him!” Remus nearly shrilled, earning him a ‘shut up you stupid sod’ from said girlfriend stealer.

“Well would you rather have both of us be tetchy tomorrow for having our beauty sleep interrupted, or just me!?” Regulus finally barked, pulling his pillow away from his face to shoot Remus a stern glare.

Remus seemed to consider his options before he begrudgingly relented and sunk back under the covers with a very petulant harumph.

“She’s going to smell like him tomorrow.” He pouted as he pulled Regulus into his arms possessively.

Regulus sighed and nuzzled further into Remus’ neck. “You can fix that tomorrow.”

Regulus felt the tension in Remus’ body relax as he no doubt imagined all the ways he would be doing just that.

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evanpeterswhoresblog · 9 months ago

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BBYG PART TWO OF GUILTY AS SIN PLEASE I LUV UR WORKSSSS

i hope you guys enjoy this!! i had a lot of fun with it. it’s technically part two but i gave it a different title sorry :)

~~~

Fresh Out The Slammer

James Potter x f!reader

warnings: smut, protected p in v, fingering, slight oral (f receiving), very slight underage alcohol but barely, morally idk how good this is, lmk if i missed any

summary: after you and Remus finally split, you and James finally come together…

word count: 2.8k

a/n: another taylor fanfic hahaha (i love this) lmk what you guys think of the end i thought it was really clever but maybe that’s just me being overconfident…

part one is here!!

~~~

I did my time

Now pretty baby I’m running back home to you

Fresh out the slammer

I know who my first call will be to...

~~~

When you look back on your days at Hogwarts, you always wonder why you and Remus stayed together so long.

It was a week after your monumental conversation with James on the grass that your overdue breakup occurred. You had tried your hardest to give your relationship one last try, you really did. But one night as you laid next to the tall lanky boy, all you could think about was a certain pair of hazel eyes. A pair that didn’t belong to the boy next to you.

That was the final straw.

“Rem,” you said, your voice cool. “I think it’s best we break up.”

You kept your eyes on the canopy above, but you could feel him shift beside you. “Really?”

“Yes. In fact, I think this is overdue. Don’t you think?”

“I suppose so...” he replied.

You turned to look at him. Unsurprisingly, he was sitting calmly as could be with a book in one of his hands. A sigh escaped your lips, but you didn’t say anything else. Instead, you simply stood and began to dress yourself. He was the one to speak again.

“Would it be all right if we remained friends?” He asked his eyes on you for what felt like the first time in a while.

“Of course. Let’s not make it odd for everyone else,” you answered.

He looked back down at his book. “Right. Good night then.”

On the walk back to your dorm you named every reason in your head why you broke up with Remus. He was distant. He didn’t know how to treat you like a true girlfriend. The spark had died between the two of you. The relationship had truly just run its course. But as you stepped into the common room your eyes found the most significant reason.

You refused to put him on your mental list.

~~~

You didn’t know if it was out of respect for Remus or if it was intentional at all, but James waited a few weeks before making any sort of move on you. You were glad. Adjusting to a single life was strange. You no longer spent time alone with Remus, you no longer cried or had fits because of his behavior. He was simply another one of your friends. You liked him better that way.

When James did give you a sign, it was far from subtle.

It came during Charms in the form of a small piece of paper. Of course, Charms happened to be the only class the two of you had together that Remus was not in as well. In fact, the only other member of your friend group who was in the class was Peter and he never paid much attention to anything. So, when you felt the piece of paper hit your lap, you didn’t hesitate to open it.

How’s the single life treating you so far? -J

You turned your head to look at James, a smile on your lips. He was already looking at you, a similar smile on his face. You felt your cheeks heat up as you scribbled your reply and threw it back to him.

It’s better than I expected, most things are the same.

He was quick to throw it back.

That’s true except now you’re free to do whatever you’d like..

You held in a breath.

More like whomever I’d like

You let out a shaky breath at his reply.

Yeah? Well, you know where my bed is

For a few seconds, you stared at the note, not sure if you should write anything more. You turned back to look at him and your eyes instantly met his. He looked at you with a gleam that you hadn’t seen in a boy's eyes in a long time, at least not one directed toward you. So, you picked up your quill and wrote back, not a single guilty thought crossing your mind.

I suppose I’m going to know what it feels like soon too

~~~

Another long week passed before anything happened between you and him. And each day that passed only filled you with more desire. You felt almost giddy at the thoughts. A secret hookup with James Potter. It was something you’d imagined for a long time, but for so many reasons you never imagined it would actually be brought to life.

But it was.

One night, there was a party in the Ravenclaw common room that everyone was attending. Everyone except you. Or so you thought.

“Are you sure y/n/n? It’ll be so much fun,” Lily questioned. You were all in the Gryffindor common room. Everyone else was getting ready to leave, but you sat on the couch in your bedclothes.

“Yeah, I’m not really in the party mood tonight. Plus, I have some work that still needs to be done,” you answered honestly.

“Boring!” Sirius exclaimed. “Don’t worry lovely I’ll make sure to save some alcohol for you.”

“Thanks, Sirius,” you said with a laugh.

“Let’s go, Wormtail, Moony, Prongs.”

“Actually, you lot can go without me. I’m not feeling the greatest.”

Your eyes shot to James. What was he doing? You noticed what he was wearing. A wifebeater and flannel pants. You swore you never wanted to shag him more than at that moment.

“Are you serious?” Sirius groaned. “Whatever mate you’re no fun. We’ll be back later.”

“All right, have fun,” James replied.

“Bye, y/n/n!” The girls sang as they left.

You waved them all goodbye before getting up and turning to the staircase. You could feel James’s eyes burning into you from behind.

“Seems it’s just the two of us for once,” he said, his voice quieter than before.

Your stomach filled with butterflies. “Yeah, it seems that way.”

“I was wondering if you could help me with some Charms work, I know you have the homework as well perhaps we can do it together...” From the tone of his voice, you knew it wasn’t true. But still, you turned and gave him a slight nod. “It’s all in my dorm, let’s just go up there to do it.”

Deep down, you knew you should’ve felt bad. James was your ex-boyfriend’s best friend. If any of them knew about your sinful thoughts, you’d surely be thrown out of the group and shunned. However, while that knowledge made you feel uneasy, it didn’t stop you from following him up to the dorm.

The second the door closed behind the two of you, James’s lips were on yours. Though it came as a surprise, you didn’t hesitate for even a second to kiss him back. His lips were warm and soft, just how you had always imagined. It was messy and quick and when he broke it you found yourself breathless. All you could do was stare at him, your cheeks pink.

“James I-”

“We can take our time if you’d like, I’m sorry I’ve just wanted to do that for so fucking long,” he replied as if he could read your mind.

“Me too, you don’t understand.” You inhaled deeply and took a few steps deeper into the dorm you were all too familiar with. Only this time, you sat on a different bed. “This doesn’t feel real.”

He sat down next to you on his bed, his glowing hazel eyes locked on yours. “Believe me, I understand everything.”

“I just... want you,” you mumbled. It felt so good to finally say it. You placed one of your hands on his thigh. “I want you a lot.”

He smiled in a way that practically sent shivers down your spine. “I want you too.”

“So, take me. You don’t... you don’t have to be gentle,” you whispered with a confidence you hadn’t felt in a long time.

Instead of answering you with words, James leaned closer and caught your lips in another kiss. This time though, it wasn’t messy and rushed. No. It was passionate, it was a kiss that would leave you giggling on your bed when you looked back on it. As your lips moved against his you followed his lead and laid back on the mattress with your legs parted for him to slip in between.

His hands were far bigger than yours. When he slid one of them up your thigh you almost couldn’t remember how to breathe. You kissed him harder and weaved your fingers through his soft curly hair. He toyed with your shorts for a moment before carefully slipping his hand beneath the fabric. It would be an understatement to say you were wet. You were soaked. And you could feel James’s smirk on your mouth when he discovered this.

“Are you always like this?” He mumbled.

You shook your head. “Only when it comes to you.”

“Good.”

He wasted no more time and moved his fingers under your knickers, finding your clit almost instantly. You gasped, one of your hands gripped his strong shoulder tightly, and your eyes squeezed shut.

“James,” you moaned.

He began to trail wet kisses down your neck as he continued to rub soft circles on your clit. Never mind thinking straight, you couldn’t think at all. Your stomach was warm, and waves of pleasure coursed throughout your entire body. You swore you’d never felt anything as good in your life. But when your hand brushed against his shirt you sighed.

“Take it off, take everything off. Please,” you whispered frantically.

You opened your eyes to see James’s bright smile. “Since you asked so nicely.”

Without another word, he leaned back and pulled his shirt off. You couldn’t stop yourself from staring. His muscles were toned, yet he was still skinny. You wanted to kiss every inch of his body, but you settled on dragging your fingers up and down his chest for a few seconds.

“Your turn,” he said.

You silently sat up and lifted your tank top over your head and threw it down to the floor. Perhaps it was the amount of lust that consumed you, or perhaps it was the amount of comfort you felt with James. Either way, you didn’t cower or feel insecure as his eyes moved across your naked breasts. In fact, you felt confident. So, you laid back down on his bed and began to pull your shorts and knickers down, your eyes not leaving his.

Only when you were fully naked did you feel a slight feeling of insecurity. James must’ve noticed this though because he leaned over you and pressed a sincere kiss to your lips.

“You’re so beautiful,” he whispered. He brushed a hand over one of your breasts. “So perfect.”

“Fuck me, James, please I can’t bear it any longer,” you replied quickly. It was true, you’d already waited so many months in silence. How were you expected to wait even a second longer?

“I think you can afford to bear it for a few more minutes. I want to have my way with you first.”

You were going to protest, but before you could he slid his hand between your thighs. He swirled his fingers over you, collecting your wetness before eventually carefully moving one of his fingers inside of you. You threw your head back and gripped his sheets hard. It was an even better feeling than you’d imagined. He kissed you hungrily as he slowly started finger fucking you.

As if that wasn’t enough, he kissed down your body minutes later before ending with his face between your thighs. You couldn’t contain your whimpers and moans. If anyone was near the Gryffindor boy's dorm, they’d surely hear you. The fact neither of you thought enough to cast a silencing charm only made it more thrilling.

By the time you reached your first orgasm, you were quite sure you’d never felt anything nearly as good in your life. Remus never cared enough to spend his time pleasuring you, at least not after the first few months. But James cared a whole lot. He touched you with his tongue and his fingers till you were shaking and panting for a break.

When he did stop you watched through heavy lids as he wiped his mouth on your thigh and began to pull down his last remaining articles of clothing. His eyes were glowing, and his glasses were almost falling off his face. You decided then that he was by far the most attractive boy you’d ever seen. And when your eyes trailed down his naked body you found yourself an even bigger reason as to why that statement was true.

“Are you on the potion?” He asked as he began to move over you.

“Yeah,” you answered, your voice weak.

He smirked. “You’re a dirty girl hm?”

“For you yes.��

“How so?”

You smiled sweetly and reached up to remove James’s glasses. “Truthfully? Sometimes I touch myself when I think of you.”

“You’ll have to show me next time.” He shifted and you felt his tip brush against your entrance. Your breath caught in your throat. “Is this what you think about?”

“S-Sometimes yes,” you said with a shaky voice.

All you could do as he slowly began to thrust into you was gasp and wrap your arms around him, your nails digging into his skin. He was big and you were still sensitive from how hard you previously came. Those factors only amplified how good he felt. Once he was fully in, he leaned down to connect your lips in another heated kiss before truly starting the shag.

Though Remus would fuck you hard, he never fucked you the way James did. James went hard, he went fast, but he also showed he still cared. At one point, he removed one of your hands from his back and pressed it against the mattress, lacing his fingers through yours. And his lips were either on yours, on your neck, or whispering sweet praises. Even the way he said your name was enough to tell you how much he cared about you.

You didn’t know how long it went on, but it was long enough that he started to grow tired. At that point, you’d already reached your second orgasm, so you decided he deserved a break. With all your strength, you flipped your positions and took some control. You lowered yourself onto him and nearly came a third time from the sounds he made.

When everything was done and over, the two of you laid next to each other out of breath and shocked at what had transpired. You felt your heart pound in your chest and a sticky feeling between your thighs. You turned your head to look at the boy next to you. He, of course, was already looking at you, his glasses back on.

“That was...”

“Better than any of my fantasies,” you told him.

“Mine too,” he agreed with a smile.

You bit down on your lip. “So now what?”

“Perhaps another go?”

That was an offer you could never refuse.

~~~

Hours later, past midnight at least, the door to the boy's dorm opened and the other three Marauders stumbled in. Sirius was far too drunk; he could barely stand up straight. That left Remus and Peter to stand on either side of him with their arms wrapped around his back protectively. All their eyes found you and James after a few seconds. The two of you sat on his bed, a foot of papers between the two of you.

“Oh, hello y/n,” Peter greeted you.

“Y/n, what are you doing here?” Remus questioned.

Sirius only gasped overdramatically. “They’re shagging! Prongsie and Lovely are shagging!”

You rolled your eyes and stood up. “Why don’t we get you to bed?”

“Can I have a go first? Before bed? Please! Is that all right Moony?” Sirius stumbled over his words as his friends dropped him into his bed.

“Nobody’s having a go unless it is Moony,” James said.

Remus turned toward you, a questioning expression on his face. “What are you doing up here?”

You pointed at the many papers on James’s bed. “Charms homework, I told you lot that’s why I wasn’t going to the party. James felt a bit better, so we just decided to work on it together.”

“Will I be allowed to use that work?” Peter asked innocently.

“Of course, Pete,” you replied. You turned back to James’s bed where he still sat, and you began to gather your work. “I should be going then.”

You held your papers close to your chest and tried your hardest not to look at James. You knew if you did, something on your face would clearly show what had really gone on. So, you kept your head down and moved as fast as you could to their door.

“Same time next week then?” James’s voice caught your attention as you were about to leave.

You looked over your shoulder and nodded, trying your hardest not to blush. “Or sooner, I’m very eager to get this work done.”

“All right, sooner, goodnight then,” James replied with a knowing look.

The last thing you heard before leaving was the innocent voice of Peter asking if he could join in and the loud laugh that James let out.

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nocturnalcharm · 5 months ago

Text

NSFW Alphabet (Logan Howlett)

𐙚 cw: everything nsfw that you can imagine. i made logan SO fucking horny lol 𐙚 a/n: all of these are just my ~opinions~ so feel free to disagree w me lol also maybe a lil self indulgent so probs not v accurate to wolvie but its alr :,) 18+ blog!! you are responsible for your own media consumption. if any of the above makes you uncomfortable, do not proceed.

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

— he helps clean you up, considering he goes like 4 fucking rounds and by the end of it, you can barely walk. helps you to the bathroom n all hehe

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

— hmm.. feel like his favorite body part on himself is his arms. and on you it’s your ass. he’s def an ass man.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

— so sorry but he cums a LOT. like a fuckton of cum, no pun intended.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

— he works out, not just bc of his job etc, but bc he likes to be able to throw you around like a ragdoll ohmygoshhh.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

—mhmm yes maam. he knows exactly what he’s doing, very experienced.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

— rly likes standing up, holding you under your legs. ALSO doggy and he pulls your hair, so your back is arched. ALSO ALSO,, missionary bc he likes to see your face

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

— def serious. never goofy. maaaybe if yall are drunk he’d be less serious but other than that.. nah.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

— he’s hairy for sureee. very hairy. keeps it tidy for you tho.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

— hahaha.. not romantic. he’s dominant and rough and mean. talks dirty, slaps, chokes

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

— tbh, feel like he doesn’t masturbate. like he’d 100% rather fuck you, and if he can’t, he’d rather just wait til he can.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

— dirty talk, spanking, lil bit of bdsm, likes to handcuff you sometimes, i could go on..

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

— bed or shower. he likes the shower for easy cleanup heheh. but tbh will fuck you anywhere if he’s horny enough

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

— lingerie. and when you sit on his lap!! also when you touch him a lot in public, doesn’t even have to be dirty, just like holding his arm, rubbing his back,,,, oof

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

— cuckholding. he’s way too possessive and jealous. not that you’d want another man to fuck you bc he does such a good job.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

— definitely likes eating pussy. feel like he can cum JUST from eating you out. you love sucking his dick too though. 69 often.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

— starts out nice & slow, so you can get used to his cock, but once you’re good, he is a fucking jackhammer; rough and fast.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

— i feel like he fucks whenever and wherever he can, no matter the time limit. he is horny. like all the time. so yeah he likes quickies.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

— likes to experiment. normally it’s you bringing up a new idea and he’s always down to try it, but if he’s not a fan, he will tell you

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

— oof.. multiple rounds. that man has STAMINA. like 3-4 rounds, or more depending on his day. typically ends with you begging for him to cum bc you can’t take anymore.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

— he doesn’t care for toys, just prefers you and him alone together. but wouldn’t be opposed to trying it if you really wanted to try something

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

— he loves to tease you; loves to watch you squirm just from his words

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

— he definitely does dirty talk and isn’t against moaning/grunting but he’s not loud.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

— just imagining you in the middle of fucking and you ask him to slap you, and he’s a lil hesitant at first bc he doesn’t want to hurt you but you both end up liking it ughhh

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

— he’s big girl… very girthy, and like 8 inches long.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

— HIIIGH. extremely high. can go multiple rounds, but it’s good bc you can too

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

— he falls asleep like right after, soon as he and you are cleaned up, he’s knocked out

. ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁ . ݁₊ ⊹ . ݁˖ . ݁

Taglist:

@figsnpassionfruits @marcybug @sacred-holy-light @keigohawks @rockytheluver @parasiiite @iluvstrawberry @18lkpeters @daydreamin1220 @hoesformenotforyou @ninuwrites @chaoticpaintsplatter @red-jay @sweet1squash @here2bawl @silversprings-mp3 @leathargic @issylovessharks @serenewrote @jakegyllenbaalz @whore-for-marvel @cookiesandcreammoolkshake @what-did-you-just-say @demitralover @midnight036 @lanassmarty @sugarrushbell @kitomon @lysmeadows @halpin4 @rebelmarylou @jupitersiberis @ginamcflurry @dilflover-420 @blubobbi @midsommarmayqueen911 @popsickle1235 @jairmi @maxx205 @kmc217 @callmejod @bellaaa32

#saige speaks #wolverine #logan howlett #logan #deadpool and wolverine #wolverine smut #wolverine fanfic #xmen wolverine #logan fluff #logan fanfic #logan fanfiction #logan smut #logan howlett fluff #logan howlett x reader #logan howlett fanfiction #logan howlett smut

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patchiko · 11 months ago

Note

I support the virgin Jason agenda so how do you think Jay would react to receiving head for the first time 👀

OUUUUHHHHHHHFUFHFIFHDJ HES ACTUALLY GRIPPING ANYTHING HE CAN

tags: @millyhelp

AK!Jason Todd Gettin’ Head For The First Time

(NSFW EXPLICIT / DETAILED)

‘tis unda da cut!

LOVE-HATE relationship with getting head.

like it feels so good and the way he feels drives him insane

but also getting that close to him without being the dominant one makes him uncomfortable

its a little rare you give him head, its when he wants to be taken care of or hes super tired but horny

it definitely takes awhile for him to be okay with it still

but for the first time hes still horrendously whipped

the entire time hes going crazy

like as soon as your head gets close to his cock his mind is going blank

JASON sits in a chair in front of you, he just got home from his mission. The weariness in his eyes was very obvious when he barely got through your window, almost crashing that night on your floor; He had been tracking a gang that was dealing poison. Problem was, they put a lot of time into being hard to trace, he spent a good month tracking their warehouse. He spent way too much time running around Gotham for interrogations and not enough around you. Solution was, when he did find them this night, they focused a lot more on their secrecy and not enough on their own protection so it was a quick fight for him. Still, the mental drain had his feet dragging, and way too much steam in his pants; Nights like this he would’ve just jacked off in the shower and went to sleep. Would’ve. But, Jason comes home and you’re still up. You just finished some last-minute assignments from your professors, if he wasn’t so busy he would’ve gotten them done for you the day they were assigned. But here he is, slipping behind you, pecking kisses to your neck, you feel his hot breath on your neck, Oh, this poor guy… One pretty little question leaving his lips —and.

Oh. <3

Now, he’s sat up on your couch, pants just pulled down, you look up and ask him one more time.

“Are you sure?” His eyes already drawn on you.

“Please.”

He just barely chokes out, voice hoarsely struck an octave lower then his usual tone and slightly cracking towards the end; the sound pitch change flowing like honey from his lips.

Oh, this poor guy. You nod, keeping your eyes on his before moving down, pecking at his happy trail, drifting down to his inner thighs, softly sucking at his skin. His eyelashes fluttering as you trailed closer to the base of his cock. He was far from small. Definitely above average, 8 inches even , and thick, really fucking thick. (Shower not grower, feeding myself sorry).You move your hand to his dick, softly pumping his twitching cock up and down, pressing tender kisses on his tip before looking up into his eyes and lapping at the vein that travels from the base of his cock and up. Your eyes fell on him, staring down on you, both of his hands propped up on the pillows around him, taking deep breaths through his nose. Barely keeping it together. Barely. You then take as much of him into your mouth as you can, moving your other hand to his balls (HAHAHA BALLS sorry), and start sucking him, jerking off the parts you didn’t take. He dropped his head back and started open mouth panting, maybe if he wasn’t tired he would’ve been able to keep himself quiet. Maybe. But, Oh, this poor guy needed this sooo bad. He’s gripping those pillows like they’re the only thing keeping him down as you take your tongue to the slit of his tip.

“ughh—“ his hand shoots to his mouth, (insert that 1 arkham voice line from game IKYKIK) ,”—Mmmh” ‘s start slipping from his mouth instead. His mind is so foggy, all he can focus on is the wet warmth around his dick and the lewd sloppy noises you’re making. Jason’s strangled grunts made you whine out your own, the vibrations around him made his head shoot down to watch you. He’s losing his grip at the sight, he moved his hand from the pillow to your where your jaw and ear meet. Brushing his hand against your skin, “Keep going,,” he let out a soft exhale, drawing circles on your skin,”Just like that…” His voice was starting to crack . Watching your pretty face he couldn’t help bucking his hips into your mouth before pausing. Jason lifts your head with his hand that was on your jaw, Breathlessly he asks, “Is that alright… Sweetheart?” He’s trying to hold it together, really fucking trying to hold it together; but his voice is so cracky and whiney right now, and he needs to make sure you’re not being hurt. But, you nod to him sweetly, with those swollen lips and those teary eyes, ”Atta’ Doll.” Barely managing to deepen his voice before starting to pump his hips, making sure to keep his pace bearable for you. Jason husked out praises every chance he got. Every jolt of his hips had him seeing stars, he just couldn’t last long.

Jason felt the base of his cock and balls (HAHAH BALLS) tighten, he furrowed his brows and let out a string of strained curses. His hips got sloppy, breath hitched before he dropped his head back and his hips stopped entirely. His pelvis perked up and body tenses as he let out sputtered moans for every pulse of thick hot cum and pleasure that roll from his cock . His eyelashes fluttering and his eyes rolled to the back of his head throughout his orgasm. Jasons body slowly slacks, after a few seconds he reached up and brushed his hair out of his face.

He panted out treble, “Mh,” ‘s and, “Ah” ‘s while he settled from his high. He reached to his mouth to sloppily wipe the bit of drool that he prayed you didn’t see. Rolling his head forward to look at you, he took his cock out of your mouth then pressed a hot kiss to your lips. Jason brought his hand to the back of your neck and continued to peck at your face. He stopped and whispered airlessly,”Thank you.” You were close enough to feel his breath panting on your face and see his hair sticking to his skin from sweat. The pleasure and exhaustion in his pretty blue eyes making him look so needy. Oh, this poor guy! You need to get him asleep ASAP!!

literally he fell asleep open mouth drooling. snoring a little too!! literally my pillow princess !!

so many kisses while you two were falling asleep, legitimately had a hard time prying himself off you

so vulnerable this night inlove so bad

him fighting to come of dominant so bad but it feels so good and he wants to be taken cared of sooo bad

he was fighting to keep his voice at a normal tone BUT HIS DRAMA QUEEN ASS!! COULD NOT KEEP QUIET!! EXPECT NOISE COMPLAINTS!! ITS 4AM GTS !!

im so down bad for the way his va had him talking HHHHH

inbox is open if you wanna rq anything or just wanna yap!

#jason todd #jason todd x reader #arkham knight x reader #arkham knight #red hood #red hood x reader #jason peter todd #arkham knight smut #jason todd smut #red hood smut #skullkidwithsunglasses

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miowritings · 5 months ago

Note

Maybe a fic of pjsk boys learning English with non-Japanese reader who’s good at it? (Feel free to ignore :D) have a nice day!

I-i-i love you!♡

Tsukasa tenma, rui kamishiro, akito shinonome, toya aoyagi x gn reader

✮a/n: sorry for being offline all of the sudden, i was thinking of quitting tumblr since i dont open it much, plus busy with school, im not gonna quit<3 more like a hiatus, ik how much it hurts to see an idol quit and i dont want yall experiencing that🙏 im more online on my ig account (@/yumi.anami) so if you want to talk, im here :DD, TRANSLATED WORDS ARE DOWN THERE!!

✮sypnosis: you, teach the boys how to speak english fluently.

✮contains: corny, sappy, love🥺

✮taglists: @akitosheart @nogenderbee

Tsukasa Tenma

-tsukasa decided that today was the day he decided to start using english! He already knew your first language wasn't Japanese, so he learns english with you, even if you speak japanese fluently

-while teaching him, he would have to ask for things in english only, yes he does know a bit of english but, its hard to communicate with such little words no?

-you introduce him to japanese and english dictionaries, flash cards, anything of the sort, even going as far as to make him listen to english songs!

-when asking for something like a ketchup or remote, he would have to say it in english

"Ah, y/n, could you please.. uh.. pass the... The.." he stutters, making some sort of movement in his hands, you know damn well he wanted that ketchup, so why not tease him? "Huh? The salt?" You ask, faking your obliviousness, tsukasa shook his head in frustration, then sighed in defeat. "The.. ケチャップ!!" He exclaims, you sigh, handing him the ketchup bottle. "Its ketchup kasa, but its okay, you got half the sentence right" you giggle.

-once he learned a bit more about the english language, he was getting the hang of it, except for his pronunciation..

-"ehem!" He clears his throat, then exhaled "i, live in a... A... Ru..ruru.." he stumbled, reading a post cards intently. "Rural, back from the top!" You stated, he groans but he knows that mistakes happen at first.

-"okay! I got this..! I, live in a ru... Rur..." He quits, groaning again, "y/n!! You picked the hard one didn't you..?!" He exclaimed dramatically, hugging you by the waist, you chuckle and carefully pushed him away. "Its a simple sentence.. i live in a rural areas ruu-raall" you exclaimed, making sure to emphasize rural "Dont push yourself okay? Theres still time.." you say, turning around to sit on the chair.

-tsukasa read the post card over and over and over until he was sure he's right! She walks up to you, reading the postcard. "I live in a... Ru...rural area! I live! In rural! Areas!!" He exclaimed in a much more louder than before, you got up and started cheering him.

-"hahaha!! Told you y/n! I dont need extra days to learn yknow?! Im like a champion!" He says playfully, you chuckle at his joke "y/n.! My dear, thank you for helping me.. ehem!" He clears his throat, making you face him "y/n! You are a.. beautiful person!" He exclaimed, making you bug eyed.

-"eh?! Since when did you know how to pronounce beautiful..?" You ask, still skeptical but impressed. "I practiced some words on my free time.. my friend said beautiful was both hard and simple.. it was challenging too.." he sighs "but i did it!!" "Yea, yea.. im proud kasa..but please dont yell in my ear.." you winced "oh.. sorry.." he chuckles.

Rui kamishiro

-rui already knew english, in fact he was good at it, so there was no need for teaching.. though he is a bit teasy with his english

-when you when you talk to him in japanese, sometimes he'll randomly speak english.

-"そしてこの犬はずっとボールに向かって吠えていた！私はただボールを取って犬に渡した" you ranted, you see rui have the mischievous grin on his face. "Oh..? At a ball? Thats very silly" he responds, in english, you sigh, knowing he would do something like this.. "really? Do you want me to speak in english or what?" You ask in english "日本人お願いします。" He stated, nodding intently.

-despite being good at english, sometimes rui has a hard time saying english words, sometimes he gets the pronounciation wrong.

-when he does get it wrong, he gets all peeved.. he knows that you'll tease him about it, but if it makes you happy, he'll laugh along.

Akito shinonome

-akito isnt that good at english, nor bad at it? Hes just there.

-ofcourse, you taught him proper english, he's still kind of pissed that he needs to study..

-"ugh.. cant i just speak to you in japanese..?" He groans, looking at the paper in his hand. "Didnt you ask me to teach you english? You cant back out now.. we went this far.." you plead to him, he sighs and reluctantly nods. "Fine.."

-even though he hates studying, he's very eager to learn, he wants to communicate well and to make you proud of him!

-akito takes alot of time when studying, so learning a new language would take wayy too long, but eventually he'll get there

-"Hmm.. say this?" You hand him a flashcard, which says "今日は天気が良さそうだと思いませんか?". "Oh..! Uh.." he clears his throat, analyzing the sentence "do..dont you.. think the.. weather looks nice today..?" He mutters, sounding unsure, his head tilting, looking at you to see your approval. "Hm.. its actually "dont you think the weather is great today?" But i'll let it pass, same meaning" you sigh.

-akito was very happy to know he translated it well.. sure it was a little.. different than the one on the flash card but it still works!

-once he knows english that much, its obvious he would tell his friends first, to flex and all.

-"Thats great shinonome-kun.!" Kohane chirped in, toya smiles proud in akito for actually studying.. an chuckles while exclaiming loudly "haha! Are you gonna speak english for the rest of your life?" She teases, smirking while waiting for a response. "Hello no.!" Akito groaned.

Toya aoyagi

-toya's already good when it comes to english speaking, hes not fluent, but its understandable.

-he would sometimes mispronounce words or get the meaning of the words mixed up, so he was glad to have you by his side.

-he would sometimes ask for you to tutor him english, the complex part of english learning.. he sometimes finds himself enjoying these study sessions..

-once he was good enough at english, he wanted to thank you so he wrote you something..

-it was a love letter, all in perfect english, he knew that it wasnt that big but he wanted you to know how youre teachings are important.

-"I know it isnt much.. but i just want you to know that our study time together paid off.." he mumbled, looking down, once he looked at you, he saw how happy, shocked and gentle you looked, he smiled at you and pulled you into a tight embrace

-"small..?! This is way too big...!!" You exclaimed, pulling hum close with a sigh.

!!Translated words!! (Translated by deepl!!)

"そしてこの犬はずっとボールに向かって吠えていた！私はただボールを取って犬に渡した" → "and this dog kept barking at the ball, so i simply took the vall and gave it to him.."

"日本人お願いします" → "japanese please.."

"今日は天気が良さそうだと思いませんか?" → "dont you thing the weather looks great today?"

#x reader #pjsk x reader #project sekai #project sekai x reader #pjsk #vbs #akito shinonome #akito shinonome x reader #toya aoyagi #toya aoyagi x reader #wxs #tsukasa tenma #tsukasa tenma x reader #tenma tsukasa x reader #rui kamishiro #rui kamishiro x reader

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moonsaver · 8 months ago

Note

I READ YOUR POST (and also anon!) ABOUT REBELLIOUS! VERITAS/RATIO, GOOD LORD..

Your writing is very good! And I like it! I'm having it for breakfast, lunch, dinner, everytime

BUT LIKE, LISTEN TO ME, WHAT IF S/O WAS REBELLIOUS LIKE HIM TOO. But not like actually him, just typical rebellious student back then. Like, breaking the rules, pissing off the teachers, etc

AND, HIS S/O IS LIKE NOW, NORMAL. A PROFESIONAL, and probably embarrassed of their phase back then. I do see them being Friendly and chilled with Ratio?? Or like "Oh crap, it's the old rebellious dude that tries to teach me random smart stuffs"

But in my opinion, I do see S/O just being like "Oh, what's up Ratio" and just being neutral. Greeting him whenever they passed by or see each other again, while also slightly joking about the things Ratio tried to teach them back then. As they told him that they actually listened to his teaching.. Even though it's.. Well, it's used by unsuccessful methods

BUT ALSO, YOU KNOW HOW XINYAN WOULD TELL EMBARRASSING STORIES ABOUT SHEHNE AND GANYU?

S/O WOULD DO THAT, telling Ratio old rebellious phase embarrassing stories to his students whenever they feel afraid of him. Like

"Oh, did you know that your professor (Veritas Ratio), used to talk so much about our teacher that just give the slightest wrong formula, to the point he keeps getting send to the office? Hah! I was there!"

As Ratio stood there with hidden embarrassed look, as he tries to hold the urge to not shut S/O up.

I'M SORRY IF I'M BOTHERING YOU, THE VOICES ARE COMMANDING ME... THE VOICES OF MY SIMPING FOR RATIO.

QNON ANON QNON!!!!YOU ARE FEEDING ME TOO I PROMISE YOU CAN BOTHER ME (its not even bothering me i love these asks),,, THE TENSION THAT IUST DISSIPATWS HAHAHA WAIT WAIT

Under the cut,might be long!

Soso, you're the rebellious kid who's butting heads with the other jerkwad, the only difference between you two is that he's just a nerd on top of being a rebellious kid. He's the "worst" of both worlds.

It's a very cliche enemies to strangers to acquaintances who respect each other to tension between possible lovers. Its kind of funny.

In your student days, I imagine the moment both of you see each other in the hall, you scowl at each other. Or make fun of something the other has. Maybe he's lugging a bulky art project and you make fun of him saying he looks like a turtle dragging his own shell. Maybe you left your bag's zip open and Veritas comments on how "devoid of knowledge" it is, "like your head" (you forgot all your books somewhere, your bag is completely empty). God forbid either of you tried something experimental and the other catches a glimpse of it. If they're not within talking distance, they'll shout on the top of their lungs. To both of you, the louder it is the more humiliation is involved. You'll find this method is often used by Veritas, as he openly quizzes you and chides LOUDLY that you're a BUFFOON and an IDIOT for not knowing a SIMPLE FORMULA. You decide to retaliate by stealing more than half his stationary, so now he has to scramble to gather extras and literally no one helps him cause he's a jerk lol.

Everyone on campus absolutely either hates it or loves it. Theres fanpages of you two with cringe edits,or those really well-made shitpost ones. Sometimes your classmates just bait the other to go a certain place just so you two cross paths and stir up a lot of trouble. The teachers are all done with both of you.

Cut to the future (or present?), reader's a professor too now. Let's assume either of them is unaware when they join the job (as implied by the request).

I imagine professor reader, if they manage to stay calm and just.. talk normally, it does give Dr. Ratio some whiplash. His pride demands he straightens himself out though, so it's not too soon before he himself drones on about some or the other tedious topic. You mention the past and how often you used to butt heads, and Veritas' first instinct is to immediately retaliate the way his past self would have done; but he stops himself in time, and sighs at it. You've painstakingly ingrained that response into him. But he's still slightly embarrassed nonetheless. It's not too soon before the conversation becomes more relaxed (I mean.. considering Veritas,as relaxed as he lets it be), and as a form of "nostalgia" he brings up all the questions he used to ask you back then, only to be pleasantly surprised when you give him detailed but professional answers. It's not too soon before he learns that you've become a professor aswell. Dr. Ratio congratulates you – with reservations of course, which is completely thrown out the window when you tell him you knew all of this because.. you listened to him.

Ugh. Don't make him feel so sappy. A part of him detests it; warming up and being all chummy with a hopeless classmate of all people. But a part of him is.. kind of happy about it.

Which is promptly changed the moment you also realize he's a professor now.

And that his students aren't spared from the nostalgia either.

He's bursting through the door, jaw dropped, angry and shocked face as you prattle on about how much of an asshole he was back in the day to his students. For a moment, he contemplates whether he should just throw chalk at you and make an example of you to his students, or drag you out. After a few seconds of paralyzed contemplation, he immediately grabs you by the back of your collar and drags you out before something else comes out of your mouth.

It's almost the same all over again – both of you bickering back and forth as he's all pissy about you spilling everything to his students! You've positively tarnished his reputation! Perhaps he shall tell your students how you used to walk around wearing a lanyard and a shirt with the institution name written on it in big, bold letters on the first day? Or that time you tripped and faceplanted right into the trashcan while you complained about his (axe bodyspray) deodorant?

Ugh.. he'll just deal with you later. Although he won't admit this even to himself.. it's nice seeing you again. He didn't think of that, it must be the headache you gave him that's making him think all weird.

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jamesdaycare · 2 months ago

Text

A Wet Service, Part 2

"Oh but maybe you´re more of an ass guy... I also have a good behind! Do you want to see it?"

"Well, judging by the throbbing on your pee pee and the little drop I see forming on its tip, I think that´s a ´yes´. But are you sure you can handle it? Say ´yes miss´. Come on, use your big boy words."

"Hahaha you´re such a good boy! Well, a deal is a deal!"

"Ohhh, someone also likes big butts I see! You´d need a ladder to put your pee pee on my cheeks hahaha. Wanna touch? Oh yes, Miss Denise has very soft skin doesn’t she?".

"Now that you´ve seen everything you need, why don´t you start stroking your little fella? Oh you want me to stroke it for you? But you have to ask very nicely sweetie. Why don’t you use your baby voice and tell me: ‘Miss Denise, I weally am a widdle boy and I don’t know what to do with my pee pee. I need your hewp! I’m not a big boy yet and I’m afraid of doing this. Can you pwetty pwease hewp me?’”

“Awww sure sweetheart, Miss Denise can help you. And it’s really brave of you to admit you’re not a big boy yet! In general, Denise treats his big boys with a full night of wild sex. But I think a little handjob is more of your speed, don’t you think?”

“Now let me get on my knees so you can have my titties on full display. Another think I like to do with big boys is putting their penises in between them and stroke them. But I’m sure your little fella would get so lost in there he’ll start calling his own mommy to come and get him.” *giggle*

“I only grabbed it and I’m already feeling it throbbing! This is going to be fast! I bet all you need is just a few strokes to make your cum cums. Oh what’s that? You feel like peeing? Oh no, don’t worry, it’s the feeling you get when you’re about to cum. Why don’t you suck your thumb so you don’t worry about this? That’s a good boy!”

“Now do you wanna make your cummies? Do you wanna make your cummies for Miss Denise? Awww yes you do! Miss Denise will give your little pee pee a big kiss on its tip so you can blow your little load, okay baby? Now get ready!”

*MUAAAAAAAK*

*SPURT SPURT SPURT*

“Ohhh what a big boy! You made your cummies for Miss Denise! And look how much you’re cumming!”

*SPURT SPURT HISSSSSSSSSSS*

“Oh my, speaking of water!”

*HISSSSSSSSSSS*

“I think someone made an “uh-oh”, didn’t he? Awww baby yes, you were right! You really needed to go pee pee back then! And your little nub relaxed so much after his big boy accident that he couldn’t hold the babyish one. I’m really sorry cutie, I should have let you go potty. Next time I promise I’ll help you. We can even use the plastic potty you have next to your crib!”

“Damn, that’s a big mess you made on the carpet… Mommy’s not going to be happy about it! Uh-oh, I know that face… Is someone about to cry? Listen, I’d love to stay and help you with this, but I have to go visit another client. Just tell your mommy you couldn’t hold it, and suck your thumb so you don’t cry that much. Now give Miss Denise a big kiss on her cheek! *MUAK* That’s a good boy! Make sure to call me again! See you!”

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strawbqq · 1 month ago

Note

HI THIS IS JUDY ON HER MAIN ACCOUNT I have to request for tecchou (and jouno too idk if you allow multiple characters 😭)

If you have ever read 'conversations with friends', it's about "tortured poets" meeting one another and bonding over it. But I was hoping for headcanons or a scene where the reader sorta "connects" with the hunting dogs over their line of work in this way? Like "I am you and you are me"

Maybe the reader is in the government but another org, idk take it however you want

If you haven't read the book/seen the show I sooooo recommend it btw it's so good 🥹

a/n: yesyes ty for requesting.ᐟ.ᐟfinally done after many many days of procrastination *ahem . I didn't read the book so im sorry if this isn't what u wanted 😭😭 enjoy.ᐟ.ᐟ

𝗕𝗦𝗗 𝗺𝗲𝗻 𝗽𝗹𝗮𝘁𝗼𝗻𝗶𝗰 𝗵𝗰𝘀 + 𝘀𝗰𝗲𝗻𝗮𝗿𝗶𝗼

[Warnings: nothing.ᐟ✰] [Word count: 536 || 𝓮𝓷𝓳𝓸𝔂.ᐟ]🍓

°ᡣ𐭩ft. tecchou, jouno

sfw. hcs

𝕋𝕖𝕔𝕔𝕙𝕠𝕦

to cross paths with tecchou is a opportunity hard to come by even though u both work for the government

you first encountered each other during a joint mission

u don't really notice him until you see him eating beef w/ chocolate i see jouno yelling his head off in the corner

you're so professional and cool that tecchou is very intrigued by you 😔

tbh for u two to connect ur the one who's gonna have to initiate the convo

u see him in action during the mission and wow 🤩 olala

after the mission, u accidentally bump into tecchou in places u wouldn't expect (maybe he was always there, you just never noticed)

it's casual at first, just a quick 'oh, its you.ᐟ.ᐟ' but then a conversation starts, and u both realize yall have a lot in common

u both love nature walks/photography idk if this is accurate BUT BUT we did see him observing ants for 8 hours sooo

after a mission or a busy week u run into each other again in a park or near a scenic area

the casual setting gives u two a chance to interact outside of work, which naturally leads to a conversation.ᐟ.ᐟ

it's a relaxing, low-pressure environment for getting to know each other better\,,after a while u two are almost like friends rather than work associates.ᐟ.ᐟ

tecchou as a friend is so calming tbh

generally lets u do all the talking before saying something totally unrelated in the middle of a rant

altogether a very steady, reliable person

in the end u two are still divided by the invisible line that separates him, a hunting dog, from you, a regular government agent

but by now he's already lots closer to u than anyone else outside work, & he'll do his best to be a loyal & dependable friend 🥰

just like, never let him cook if u know u know

𝕁𝕠𝕦𝕟𝕠

you're sent to deliver important documents from your organization to the Hunting Dogs' HQ

it's a routine assignment, but when u arrive, alarms go off for some reason 😔

before u can explain yourself, jouno appears out of thin air using his ability and scares the shit out of you

well, he cant do no nothing bc he knows ur telling the truth

ngl, for u to feel connected to this guy, u must be one heck of a simp

u *might get on agreeable terms w/ him after a while, though, if you say you also hate tecchou

you're called back for multiple deliveries throughout the month

jouno, against all odds, actually remembers u.ᐟ.ᐟ wow

just talk to him and try not to be annoyed by his rants :)

challenge him (respectfully) he's gonna cheat

jouno as your friend tho???

100% blunt honesty, you're probably gonna get mad 9 times out of 10

probably knows u better than u know yourself after a while

absolutely doesn't let u get a word in, rants the whole time about tecchou or anything that annoyed him

u can never tell if he's joking or not

one of these days he's gonna go, 'why u smell like...blueberry and wet dog—'

yes please smack him for me

a/n: again im so sorry if this isn't what u wanted judy, im so proud that u requested 😭 BUT YAY FINALLY DONE HAHAHA (ﾉ´ヮ`)ﾉ*: ･ﾟ ty to everyone who read this, have a good day.ᐟ.ᐟ

𝓽𝓱𝓪𝓷𝓴 𝔂𝓸𝓾.ᐟ ʚ🍓ɞ ʀᴇʙʟᴏɢs + ʟɪᴋᴇs ʜɪɢʜʟʏ ᴀᴘᴘʀᴇᴄɪᴀᴛᴇᴅ

o(≧▽≦)o

#bsd #bsd fanfic #bsd hcs #jouno x reader #jounohcs #jouno x you #tecchou x reader #tecchouhcs #bsd brainrot #bsd x y/n #fluff #bsd fluff

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noroi1000 · 2 years ago

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Hi! It's me ...again hahaha.

I hope you're ok, I'm really glad see your updates again.

I see you have open request and I want to try it. I'm in love with werewolf Suguru...what about a mating and heat cycle with his lovely mate? And jelousy scene because other werewolf it's just nice with Y/N, not in romantic way, just being nice.

Basically shameless smut. Hahaha I'm really sorry if it's uncomfortable for you, my apologies. But I'm in ovulation week so... I'm just hot v: and I love Suguru so much.

Really my apologies if it's make you uncomfortable.

Please stay healthy and have a lovely week!!good luck in school!!

I'm in heat

•°-Shameless smut-°• +18

Werewolf Geto in heat cycle x mate reader

NSFW: breeding, rut, pussy eating, possessive sex, knot fucking, marking

Words:3k

His body was sweaty when you touched him. And he just woke up. Was he too hot at night?

Maybe werewolves have different temperature needs?

After all, werewolves stand out even in appearance from other people.

For example, your partner and his best friend. And others too.

If he has any other temperature needs, why aren't you informed? You are his mate!

"Suguru? Are you too hot?" you asked, rubbing his bare back gently.

He was sweating.

"Hot..." he muttered as he sat on the bed with his back to you. "I'm going to take a cold shower."

"Are you okay?” you asked, placing your hand on his muscles. You ran your fingers over his skin, gently scratching his back because he liked it.

His low ponytail lay loose on his back.

He turned his head to the side to look at you.

You smiled slightly at him. Your hair in a mess as your soft thighs were clearly accentuated by the fact that the sleeping shorts he bought you were really short.

A camisole hugged your breasts and one strap fell off your shoulder.

He forgot he started the heat cycle today...

Why did he forget again...

Last time he lied to you that he was going to another city for a few days. And at the time he was in his apartment trying to survive his heat.

Since he's with you, his heat comes on so intensely. That's what happens when you have a partner.

You have been his mate for two months, but the first month you managed to avoid his several-day rut.

Last month, because he didn't want to hurt you, he went on a trip to wait it out.

And this month? He can't... He can't come up with an excuse to go anywhere.

In addition, your smell intensifies what is happening in his body.

Your neck looks so pretty and appetizing. Bite that spot and tag you again. Just like he did for the first time during sex. However, he didn't have a heat cycle back then. So he could control himself.

And now he knew it wouldn't work.

Your appearance was so striking to his eyes. His pupils dilated so much, swallowing the violet in his eyes.

My heart sped up. His body was so eager to pounce on you, and mark his mate again. To cover you with its scent. To mark yourself as his.

Your scent entered his nostrils, and he thought he was drooling.

Your scent so intense and sweet.

He failed to calculate everything correctly.

Because you also ovulated.

His body reacted to his partner's body.

That's why his heat kicked off very intensely because your heats were in sync.

Damn werewolf body...

His body lines up with your cycle only to impregnate you at your most fertile time.

And since your cycles were close in time, his body aligned itself with yours.

Your scent signaled it to him.

Because every werewolf in heat would like to have a sweet and fertile mate under him that he can breed so much.

That's why werewolves are so flexible about this sort of thing.

And since you are his mate, his body has become so used to you. Now his heat will always be when you ovulate.

A partner for life...

However, your rut synchronized very quickly.

And because he lives with you, and is beside you daily, he will no longer escape your cycles.

Although werewolf cycles run much more intensely than human ones.

Because if you were a werewolf too, and you were in heat, you'd be jumping on him to breed you by now. Especially if you felt he was in heat too.

The longer you've been with a werewolf as a human, the more you'll get used to the pheromones he gives off.

And as your body gets used to it, your body will respond.

You will be like his little partner.

You may not react as much to the smell, but it will be stronger for you than it is now.

His mind veered very quickly to think about how you'd be moaning when you asked him to come inside you.

„My Alpha... Please..."

"I want you now... Please... Breed me..."

He would love to hear his mate beg him for it.

If so, he'll probably jump on you in a few days anyway and fuck you into oblivion when your smell becomes unbearable to him.

As his hormones take possession of his body.

When all he has in mind is how soft your thighs look. Same with breasts.

He will only think about stroking that soft pussy and listening to you purr for him.

To put his cock in your tiny tight hole and stretch his shape inside you.

Because there is no werewolf who does not think about having sex with a partner during the heat as if the world was about to end.

He thought of it at first as something that's probably not pleasant, because you only think about sex and you only want sex.

But when he experiences it, he feels how pleasant it is. So very pleasant.

Even though he feels an irresistible urge to strip you now and fuck you until you're dripping with his scent. His body tells him to put his puppies inside you.

"Are you okay?" You asked him, hugging him lightly.

Your slightest touch made him feel like you were only touching his cock.

He was more sensitive. Your tiny touch was so pleasant to him.

It made him want more of that touch.

The lower your hands were, the more he felt pleasant shivers as your scent also reached his nose stronger.

You may not notice that right now his pheromones are attacking your body to show you that your alpha wants you now, but you clearly felt something between your legs. Your neck was a little irritating where he last bit you.

Your cute body, even if you're a human, next to him, which is a powerful alpha, you too can very easily start to act like a little omega.

Werewolves are not much different from humans.

Its pheromones act as an aphrodisiac for you.

A few more months or a year and you will be like his little omega when his pheromones get you.

"Sugu... Don't ignore me... Are you okay?"

"I'm fine..." He replied with a small smile.

His hand reached for his erection that had formed in his sweatpants.

It was so hot... Outside and inside.

He wanted your warmth to soothe his warmth.

Do what his body wants.

Mark you and breed you.

"Really? You're sweating." You said.

"I'm just in heat." He laughed as if it was something to joke about.

The heat cycle has never been something to laugh at, especially between partners.

Because heat for partners is endless sex for almost several days.

"Heat?" you murmured. "Oh, rut yes?"

"Yep." he laughed.

He really wanted to laugh about it, because maybe you will laugh about it too?

"Are you... are you..." you pulled away from him blushing.

Everyone had biology in school.

Everyone knows that rut is the period when creatures reproduce.

You sat behind him with your knees bent on one side of your body.

You felt warmth between your legs and also on your cheeks.

You feel the sexy heat emanating from his. His scent is so erotic.

Well, you ovulated. Maybe that's why you found it sexy that he was sitting next to you shirtless...

But you felt something pulling you towards Him.

Is it because he's in heat as a werewolf?

"Do I what?" he asked with a smile. Roses on his cheeks.

Not because he was ashamed.

Only his blood flow is so fast that his skin is pink.

Blood flowing to his crotch.

The veins on his body are starting to become more visible.

"Do you want to... you know..." You muttered rubbing your hand over your thigh.

"Haha... I look like I don't want to?"

Suddenly, he turned completely sideways to you, and showed you the taut muscles of his torso, as well as his taut pants underneath which his hard erection stands, waiting for his partner's touch.

Your face was red when you saw it.

But you couldn't help the fact that the sight of him so lecherously made you feel wet between your legs.

"So I'm going to take a shower. I need to get some rest." He said as he stood up.

"Suguru." you called him.

Your finger between your teeth as you briefly wonder if this is a good idea.

He told you that werewolf heat is no small thing. Because it lasts almost up to one week, and it's an intense period, both for the body and for the emotions. Because it's thinking about your partner and about sex all the time. Taking care of your partner and sex. And then there are the periods of possessiveness. The alpha partner does everything to keep the omega partner with him. In your case, you are the omega partner and Suguru the alpha. And that means he'll be jealous of everything for a few days, he'll be so needy of touch, he'll drive any other "alpha" away from his mate, and will always be somewhere with you to take care of you. And every day he'll think about pinning you under him and fucking you.

What will your few days look like?

You've been his girlfriend for a long time, but you've been his "mate" for over two months.

Which means he just tagged you as his lifelong partner recently. Even though he already felt you as a potential mate he would love to have. But he preferred to wait for your permission so he could mark you as his.

Since you've agreed to be the alpha werewolf's mate, you must attend to his needs.

Besides, if his estrus affects you like that when you're ovulating, you can't ignore it.

He was looking at you, waiting for what you would say.

He was so hard to control himself not to throw himself at you now. You were so lovely.

So fertile~.

He could very easily keep you in bed and mean so much. Shove his cum inside you.

However, this will be your first time together when his heat reacts to his partner. This will be your first time with him so wild.

Even more than it was every time you had sex.

There's also a chance you'll say no and he'll spend a few days fucking his hand...

The heat cycle activates when the werewolf gets a mate.

There is always rut.

But the heat comes when you have a partner.

Once a month.

His heat is here because you are in heat.

So he's in heat, his heat, because he's feeling your body.

Theoretically, alphas don't have the same as omegas that get heat and wait for their partner.

Alphas have an estrus once a month, which is simply associated with a great desire for sex.

But when the alpha heat synchronizes with the heat omega, then it's like heat. That's why he is like this now.

Alphas go crazy when they feel their partner is fertile and willing.

Just as internally there is a war within him. Control yourself and also pounce on you.

His body wants to pounce on you, but his wits stop him because this would be your first time he's like this.

During estrus, alphas are more brutal, but not so much as to hurt their partner.

He's more like a hungry animal.

You let him once, and he'll be like this for a month.

When he knows your body can handle it.

And he knows your body will last forever.

"Come, if you want..." you said spreading your arms. By inviting him to you.

Your face was red as you looked to the side.

You still knew his dick was stuck in his pants so tight.

"Are you sure?" He asked. "Once you agree, there's no going back."

"I'm your mate... right?"

"Are you not afraid?" He asked smiling as he knelt in front of you on the bed.

"Why should I be afraid of you?"

"I'm unpredictable at a time like this. You don't know what I would love to do right now."

"My partner won't hurt me. After all, a partner never wants to do anything bad for a mate, right?"

His body suddenly towered over you, his fingers digging into the softness of your thighs.

His lips were immediately pressed against your throat.

He ripped your shorts off your legs, doing it with your panties. They landed in tatters on the floor.

As his fingers dug into your pussy without warning, stretching you.

A sweet scent reached his nose, and he felt his cock throbbing in his pants.

Keeping his fingers inside you in one place, he felt your soft, hot walls tighten around his fingers.

Moisture trickled down his palm as he pressed the palm of his hand against your clit.

Your body really reacts so sweetly to his estrus. And your rut is so beautiful. That nice smell.

He moved his mouth to the side of your neck and sank his teeth in.

He groaned at the sweet scent that enveloped his sense of smell.

He unconsciously moved his fingers inside you lightly, massaging your g-spot. Listening to your sweet moans as he didn't stop.

He felt like he could come just by listening to your noises.

His mind was clouded by his instincts, so he was surprised when more of your juices spilled onto his hand moments later. And your walls squeezed his fingers.

With a wet sound, he pulled his fingers out of you, feeling the one thigh he was holding shake.

He put his wet fingers to his lips and licked everything clean, savoring the taste of his mate.

He wanted more.

Without warning, he dived between your legs and began to lap up your folds aggressively.

Your legs jumped in susceptibility to the sudden attack.

"S-Suguru...!" You groaned as you grabbed his hair.

Causing a pleasant burning sensation in his head.

It was so good.

His hand reached for his cock, stroking it, keeping his hand under his pants.

His hips moved on their own, swaying his length in between his fingers.

You saw the very lascivious sight of his tongue leaving your pussy, with a thin line of sticky fluid connecting your sensitive body to his wet muscle.

His fingers tightened around its broad base.

His long fangs began to bite your thigh, savoring the softness of his mouth.

"I can't hold back anymore." He said in an intense voice.

The purple of his eyes was completely devoured by his dilated pupil.

You didn't want him to hold back.

Since you were his mate, you had to do everything for him to help him with his rut.

He's so crazy about how cute you are. How much you got his attention with your body and smell. Because your ovulation was showing him how willing and tasty you are.

Your short shorts digging into the fat of your soft thighs. Ah... That was all that made him go crazy right away.

He stood up, hastily lowering his pants.

If he took it off, it would take too long. He wanted to be in his tight mate right now. Feel yourself sucking it inside. Feel how nicely you take all of him, trying to contain every inch of him.

To watch later as his wick spreads inside you, ensuring not a drop of his cum comes out of you.

You saw a furious red tip that cried a lot of precum. Pulsating thick shaft. Certainly long and thick enough to destroy your pussy.

Especially since you know who that heavy dick belongs to.

As he quickly moved closer to you, he tore off your shirt with his hand. You felt him pull on the fabric and then suddenly your chest was exposed to him. Your nipples are stiff from everything he does to you.

With a sigh, he immediately placed his mouth on your tit, biting your nipple lightly with his sharper teeth.

His hips thrust blindly into yours and your wetness running down your skin very quickly led him to your willing hole, which greeted him with a very pleasant hug.

He didn't even have to enter you slowly because your walls offered no resistance whatsoever. Letting him find the bottom right away. His balls pressed tightly against you.

Its tip was releasing precum inside you to facilitate the breeding process, but that wasn't necessary at all because you were dripping.

His hips quickly settled into the rhythm of hitting you. His pubic bone was pressed against your clit, and his pubic hair gave an extra prickly and soft touching sensation as he thrust into you.

He was in a hurry, chasing to fill you up.

He didn't try to make you moan the loudest, he didn't change the rhythm. Because he just wanted to fill you up.

Every move he made made your body squirm. Waves of quivering pleasure ran down your spine.

His lips reached for yours, catching your tongue to kiss you deeply.

He caught all your moans that came out of your mouth like music.

As he felt your moans increase, he didn't slow down. You felt his knot slowly forming, a sign of his forming orgasm.

Your pussy was getting more and more stretched. But the pinching disappeared as quickly as it appeared.

Particularly when his knot brushed against your g-spot, pressing it hard you clenched his entire cock. Feeling that way, his body squeezes your clit between your bodies.

Your head throbbed as he bit your neck, inhaling the ethereal scent.

Sucking your pussy as well as the feeling of you stretching around his knot made him shoot copious amounts of cum into you.

Your legs trembled around his hips as his dick extension ensured nothing would leak out of you.

But at some point he pulled out of you and your pussy spat out a wider chunk of his flesh with a loud sound.

But what is it supposed to be? Why isn't he soft?

Is that how his rut works?

Why did you have to be in the heat?

"S-Sugu... How long is your rut...?" You asked quietly, breathing to calm yourself down.

He chuckled briefly with a heavy breath before thrusting into you again.

"Five days." He whispered against your lips before kissing you.

____

"Wow, Suguru, I know you can have rut or whatever now, but don't be so aggressive towards me. I'm not going to take your mate." Laughed the White-haired man with whom you were talking a moment ago.

Your alpha wrapped his arms around your waist, pulling you to him.

His nose rested on your shoulder, inhaling your scent, mixed with his.

"I'm not taking your partner. Even though she smells pretty sweet. She's not an omega, is she? Is she human?" he asked with a smile. "(y/n), how long will he keep doing this?"

"A bit more. Sugu, do you want to go home?" You asked, stroking his head.

You moaned as he squeezed you tighter.

"Fine... Sorry (y/n), we'll talk when his rut is over, okay?" Your friend waved to you.

"Bye." You waved at him. "Suguru what's up?"

"He's a werewolf too..." he said kissing your neck.

"But we are friends."

"He is the alpha. And you are my omega."

"I guess you're too used to be a werewolf." You laughed quietly. "I'm a human, not an omega werewolf."

Suddenly his tongue licked your ear.

"But you are my omega partner~. And as an alpha partner, I want my mate for me. That's why I will mark you."

#geto suguru #geto suguru x reader #jujutsu kaisen #jjk #jjk x you #geto smut #suguru #geto suguru x y/n #geto suguru x you #geto suguru smut #werewolf au #werewolf smut #Werewolf Geto #geto x reader #jujutsu kaisen smut #jjk x reader

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otomiyaa · 5 months ago

Text

Ticklish Caelus x Reader

Romantic + 44. “I can’t let you go unpunished.” Requested by anon for my 1K Followers Event🌻

Mischievous, sassy, sometimes a little evil. These were traits of your boyfriend that weren't new to you. But that didn't mean you would let him get away with it!

"You look like you want to chase me for this, but good news, I'm not going to run. So we can spare your breath."

Oh Caelus, Caelus, Caelus. You shook your head at him in disapproval. On his lips were the remains of the last bit of chocolate cake; yes, the special one from Belobog! The expensive one! The plate, empty! His expression, smug!

Naughty Caelus literally ate all of the cake while you only had 2 pieces. And he knew it was your favorite. It wasn't as if Belobog was around the corner either - it was on a different planet.

You sighed. "Seriously? Well, if you're not going to run, fine with me. Makes this much easier."

You stepped towards him, and for a moment it seemed as if Caelus expected something like, yeah.. something like what? What did he expect? Aggressive kissing? A slap in his face? He closed his eyes and leaned forward a little, looking eager to accept his punishment.

Judging from his behavior, he didn't seem to think you'd do this.

"HUH? Nohoho waahah-whahahait!" His sudden laughter and confused noises proved to you that he really didn't expect you to tickle him. How odd.

"You could've seen this coming, Caelus. I can’t let you go unpunished. Mean boyfriends get the tickle punishment, it's an unwritten rule."

"I wahahasn't mean- no hahaha dohohon't!" He reached for your hands but failed to stop them from traveling under his shirt. You enjoyed the feeling of his abs under your hands as you tickled him vengefully. To think all that delicious cake was stored in there now!

"You ate my cake and were smug about it. So yes, you were mean, Caelus," you lectured him while giving his stomach a very well-deserved ticklish treatment. Caelus squirmed like a funny worm and laughed hysterically.

"It wahahas ours-ahahaha!"

"I bought it, and even if I bought it for you too, you could've at least shared a bit more."

"Buhuhut- eeeheehehe!" Seeing his huge smile and the crumbs near his lips, you then wondered if he dirtied his mouth on purpose. He normally wasn't that messy with eating.

You now realized why this silly guy was probably expecting something else than tickling. Well, now that the same thought made its way into your mind too, it was hard to not give in. Even though it would be exactly what he wanted.

"I cahahan explahaha-heheheh hmph!" Caelus squeaked when you kissed him. You pinned him against the wall and tasted the delicious cake on his lips. Caelus relaxed against you and immediately kissed you back.

Naughty naughty. "HMPH!" You grinned mid-kiss when you felt him twitch and jump; your fingers were still under his shirt and now tickled his bare sides and tummy with rapid scratches and scribbles.

Caelus danced between you and the wall, letting out muffled giggles as he tried to continue kissing you. To take a deep breath yourself you moved back for a moment and smirked.

"What, didn't think I would just give you what you wanted hm?"

Caelus stared at you with a blush. "Yeah - I have a confession to make," he said breathlessly. You rolled your eyes fondly.

"Yes yes, you wanted to piss me off deliberately and score some angry kisses. I get it now," you said, and you immediately resumed the tickle punishment without mercy. Caelus shook with hysterical laughter and shook his head.

"Nohoho I d-didn't I- ahaahah! Wahahait- lehehet me, aahhahaa!"

The more you tickled Caelus, the happier you felt. Maybe you were glad he was provoking you. This way you didn't need to feel sorry for taking advantage of this ticklish cutie.

"Lehehet me speheheak ehehee!" Caelus whined.

"Speak? You prefer kisses, don't you?" And your lips were on his again, muffling his laughter and definitely not making this easier on him. You felt him lose the strength in his legs, and he slid down to the floor.

Your lips remained together as you followed him down. Then the moment he lay sprawled on the floor, you continued the merciless tickle attack.

"Plehehease! Nonono ahahaha!" Caelus squealed. He was the cutest. There were no more crumbs left on his face, but he looked adorable with that pretty blush on his cheeks and the tears in his eyes. Yes, you were lucky to have such a mischievous, sassy and evil boyfriend who would deserve a tickle punishment like this from time to time.

When you finally stopped and let him catch his breath, Caelus said again: "I c-can explain hehe."

"What else is there to explain?" you asked. He then weakly lifted his hand and pointed at the cupboard behind you.

"C-check there, p-please hehe," he giggled tiredly. Enjoying his cute sounds even after you had stopped tickling him, you got up and to your surprise, found more cake hidden.

"I didn't eat everything, I wanted you to think so."

When you looked at him again, you noticed the cutest pout on his lips. "The reason, well... y-you were right."

PFFT. He really thought he could score some angry kisses for free and got himself a tickle punishment instead. Caelus and his silly way of thinking, you couldn't help but love him for it.

"You're crazy, and that's why I love you," you said, and before he could get up from the floor, you were on top of him again, this time giving him the passionate kisses he may have longed for!

#x reader tickles #honkai star rail #caelus #x reader #caelus x reader #tickling #tickle fic #otomiya!writes #lee!caelus

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lovelyrotter · 1 year ago

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okay but i actually kinda wanna know ur take on stridercest being canon compliant O_O <- autism stare

oh hey i am also hitting you with the autism stare. ill try to get my thoughts down in a way that makes sense to more than just me hahaha

bear in mind that im an epilogue lover and i think Meat/Candy are really valuable pieces that further all of the characters and are also hard canon in the sense that we're looking at just 2 post-game universe outcomes out of an uncountable number (the book in the picnic basket representing post-canon fanfic). i think the characters actions in the epilogues make sense and are satisfying to me. yes even jane (i love alpha jane and i will not do her the disservice of 'cleaning her up' w/o showing her work for it. thats not how you depict a character who grew up with fascist programming). i could totally go on a whole tangent about this specifically but thats another post lol we'd be here forever and its also not stridercest

but okay. canon stridercest. under the cut cause it got kinda long

basically it has to do with the cherubs and how their relationships and mating rituals are pretty obviously incestuous leaning even though cherubs dont have the human concept of Siblings or blood family. the cherub who predominates will search across paradox space to mate with another cherub who closely resembles the cherub they predominated which is like textbook Freudian sexuality. theres a lot of Freud and Jungian stuff in HS imo even if im kinda [wobbly hand gesture] at the validity of these theories applied to real life and real people. but theyre super fun tools and lenses to use in fiction and i mean. gestures at all of dave

so the incest aliens cherubs. the whole reason why im talkin about them is bc Caliborn is so incredibly interested and invested in the Striders in particular. caliborn as both Lord English and Lil Cal shapes earth NOT OVERTLY but more so embeds himself in earth society, but again, the Striders lives in particular. dave is full of incest jokes. hes even apparently got a list of his friends arranged in order of how likely theyd incest-elope with each other (thank you epilogues for this amazing factoid). he seems to think about it often enough to, yknow, Do That. have a good solid think about that and construct an organized list about it. bearing in mind dave makes jokes about stuff thats a) bothering him, or b) generally camping out in his brain. hes not even really aware of it most of the time (as we see in one of the openbounds where hes all 'why am i thinking about puppets???' after seeing dirk for the first time in that dream bubble. he is thinking nonstop about dirk at that point and going off his only frame of reference for ANY dirk, which is his bro. his bro who was most likely deeply warped by Lil Cal)

sorry for the long blocky paragraph lol. but now onto the next thing

Caliborn as Lil Cal is the centerpiece in the beta strider apartment. dave cant escape him and beta dirk grew up with him. what the fuck do you do when youre childhood comfort item is also the most evil creature across all of paradox space? if youre a dirk you try to fight it. but how long can you keep fighting something like that. its safe to say that bro was affected by Caliborns particular brand of perversion and sfw kink. i dont think i have to say how insidious abusive and toxic he is about those things. and looking at the truth of beta bro (16yo alpha dirk) you can start to see just how warped beta bro became. beta bro is a false dirk (still a very Real dirk but not the Truth of dirk. beta bro has been toxified and made infinitely worse by an absolute evil influence over decades of life. in 80s fuckin texas. presumably in the system. anyone would be fucked up after that)

so for this analysis/theory im stating beta bro as a false persona. using jungian terms he is apha dirk's shadow

both dave and dirk live with a fake, carefully manicured version of their bros. they live with personas (or shadows of their guardians on the walls. hello platos allegory of the cave). they dont actually know e/o and they dont until the striunion

alpha dirk especially grows up embedded in the Public Persona Of Dave Strider 400 years post mortem and completely alone with unlimited internet access. hes a self admitted expert on his bro and we dont get to see a lot if any of his early childhood but i can hazard a guess at how much he clung to that persona of his bro. he fuckin idolizes dave. he LOVES dave. right off the bat he is in some kind of love with dave and i think if you try to argue against that then thats you slippin. i think youre a fool and have to reread homestuck because i wholeheartedly believe the striders loving eachother is part of the win state

once again this is speculation cause we get barely anything about alpha dave, but from what we already know about him im guessing this bro-persona is

achingly effortlessly cool

oozing masculinity (toxic or not, not really interested in categorizing that although toxic coolboy masculinity IS something the striders contend with & is an important facet in their lives)

a skilled fighter

a dedicated moviegoer (hes a director need i say more. this one is probably the only genuine thing about his on-screen persona)

and now lets look at jake. someone whos grown up on pretty much nothing but movies, whos doubtlessly been influenced by hollywood and its idea of gritty 'main character' masculinity through that, and who also clings to more old-school ideas of manliness (think victorian/edwardian era gentlemanly-but-loves-a-good-scrum kinda manly. moustache twirly with a monocle kinda manly. basically everything that grandpa harley is)

but okay lets look at what jake wants to be. lets take a look at his teenager persona

achingly effortlessly cool (his own 'hollywood star' kind of cool also def influenced by his favourite characters like lara croft who is indeed achingly cool. you see him succeed in inhabiting this hollywood star persona on earth c)

oozing masculinity (the old school manly mans-man kind)

a skilled fighter (two pistoles always. harder to aim cause you cant use a free hand to make up for kickback. that takes skill)

a dedicated moviegoer (again one of the only genuine parts about his persona. his questionable-to-wretched tastes aside. but bearing in mind that the SBaHJ movies are intentionally bad which is what makes them loop around to good. such is the nature of intentionally 'bad' art. jake fuckin lives in this perpetual bad-good art loop. okay enough with the art tangent keep focused man cmon)

because dirk has obviously way more contact with jake i dont doubt he sees through jakes own (admittedly way more flimsy) coolboy persona but the point still stands i think. different flavours but the same kinda guy. dirk has a type and i dont think its a stretch to say that hes looking for aspects of the bro-persona he grew up looking at in other boys, much like the winning cherub looking for the one they lost in the cherub theyll mate with

also wtf is with dirks obvious boner for dave chasing him across paradox space to decapitate him huh?? the last few sentences in Meat are about that very thing. he wants to fuc fight dave sooo bad. haha remember how the cherubic mating ritual is one of the most violent and long running spectacles in paradox space? i sure do

#stridercest #davedirk #dirkdave #alphacest #my t #thank you if you read all this HAHAHA #i am dedicated to my craft (autistic) (indulgent)

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