#its so strange i just dont see what it is

[v1x3n]

SNAP OUT OF IT — j.price

⸝⸝ PAIRINGS ⫶ childhood friend!john price x reader

⸝⸝ SYNOPSIS ⫶ after not seeing your childhood bestfriend for a while, you meet him again at a bar. he says some strange things, things you didnt quite understand after you confirm that your soon going to get married.

⸝⸝ TAGS ⫶ angst - just lovesick john not getting what he wants.

"whats been happening in your world?"

"what have you been up to?"

you and john both accidently speak over eachother, you exchange a soft laugh as your eyes meet his. a hint of something lingers in the air, something unspoken of. "i heard you fell in love." john mumbles slightly, stirring his glass of whiskey aorund slightly.

you nod silently, looking down at your own drink, "yeah," youexhale with a slight smile plastered onto your face.

he could tell by the way your eyes lit up and your cheeks grew rosy that you were inlove with this guy. the guy? john met him ages ago. total dickhead. he wanted you to snap out of this love spell he had clearly put you in but he felt like he left it too long. the effects of the spell had already grown too strong.

"hes uhm asked me to marry him actually," your hand raises to show you the shiny ring. johns heart drops. you dont sound so happy about that though. "oh so your settlin' down?" john peeps up, taking a swig from his drink. letting the fluids travel down his throat with a familiar burn. "more like giving up." you joke with a slight of truth lingering in the words.

"it dont sound like you, yk getting married." he once remebers how you used to cringe at the thought of being tied down, when you two would sneak out as kids and think about the future. "guess things change when you meet the right person" you shrug, glancing him up and down as hes thinking its almost like your under a spell.

your drink sipped when you bring it up to your lips, "itll happen one day for you," you comment. "snap out of it." john says with a brooding voice.

"you- w-what?" you cough slightly on his sudden words. "its like your under a spell. fucking hypnotized." he rolls his eyes and takes a large swig. the liquid fueling his anger.

you tremble slightly, stepping back but it was no point cause john stepped two steps closer. pulling his hands out to hold your face, his fingers moving over your cheeks, "darling, how could you be so blind?" he practically scoffs at you. your confused, eyebrows raised and your dumbfounded expression plastered on your face.

that night you get home, plastered and you couldn't help but think what john was talking about. your thoughts remained on him for the night, even whilst in bed with your soon to be husband, johns face was the one you saw.

you needed to snap out of it.

john also needed you to snap out of it as he sat on his couch. thoughts clouding his mind as he went through old photos of youand him. seeing one where your arms slug around his shouldets, your cherry face showed and he had a daft grin plastered on his face - a smile he ever only did with you. his eyes glistened in the picture. practically glowing of love. his eyes looking towards your rosy face. he thought to himself, how did you never notice?

so he sent a text to you attaching the photo that held a beautiful memory.

'ill be here waiting patiently for you to snap out of it."

[jd-loves-fiction]

𝐊𝐚𝐤𝐚𝐯𝐚𝐬𝐡𝐚

❏ 𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: Aventurine x GN!Reader

❏ 𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: fluff + ANGST!!!

❏ 𝐰𝐜: 1.6k

❏ 𝐬𝐮𝐦𝐦𝐚𝐫𝐲: Aventurine has been distant since returning from Penacony. He finally decides it's time to tell you all you deserve to know... or as must as he can bring himself to, for now. His real name seems like a good place to start.

❏ 𝗮/𝗻: Full disclosure, this was meant to be smutty but I got lost in the sauce (angst and Aven's incredible character writing) so all aboard the sad but fluffy train instead :)

The heavy oak door slides open smoothly, the sound of expensive leather shoes tapping against wooden floors as Aventurine sighs far too heavily. When you look around the corner at him, he’s taking off his hat before tugging off his shoes. 

“Hello,” you breathe softly, hand upon his chest while pecking his chapped lips. He offers a low grunt in response as you draw back to look him over, “Riney?”

He seems to flinch, an anguished expression there in a second and gone the next, covered by that deceitful veil of a smile, far too cheerful to be genuine, “Darling–”

Your finger meets his lips before he has a chance to pretend like nothing is wrong, along with a stern but fond look. You take his coat and begin leading him further into the apartment, urging him to sit on the couch.

Ever since Penacony he’d been… distant. Not that your relationship had ever been especially intimate before, at least not emotionally, but something had changed on that planet. You’d catch him watching you more than usual, looking away when caught unlike usual; see him reach for you out of the corner of your eye only for his hand to drop before it touched you; he’d begin to form a sentence with a strangely serious look on his face before slamming his mouth shut in obvious frustration.

The night he’d returned… you could tell there was something itching to make its way out past his trembling lips… but knowing he’d be meeting with the rest of the Stonehearts early the next morning you told him to rest instead; to tell you another time.

It’s been weeks. And with his increased workload, the subject just hasn't come up – that's what you told yourself anyway. Clearly there was something he wanted, needed to say, but your relationship had never been one where you’d be allowed to push him for an answer and vice versa… you learned that very early on.

So you dont push him for an answer, kneeling between his legs and caressing his cheeks, “Tired?”

He nods wordlessly, eyes barely open, subtly leaning into your affection. He must be truly exhausted, “Come on.”

“Hm?” The look on his face when you pull away so suddenly to stand breaks your heart – like he’d been broken out of a trance, “I’ll run you a bath.”

Your feet itch to shuffle nervously, afraid you’ve pushed too far. He seemed receptive, but what if he’s done letting you in?

“Okay…” Aventurine whispers, taking your hand and letting you pull him along towards the bathroom. You don't comment on the dazed look on his face.

The man sits by as you warm the water, softly rambling about bath salts and scents you think he’ll enjoy, and other topics he cannot bring himself to focus on as the storm that has been building since Penacony starts boiling over.

You deserve to know. He must tell you– but what if– no. You deserve to know. No matter how much he would rather keep your relationship as is instead of risking ruining everything by telling you the truth, he cannot keep it to himself any longer.

If you call him that name again, in that sweet, lovely voice of yours, he might snap.

“Water’s warm.” He snaps out of his haze, managing a small smile in acknowledgment, before standing up to take his clothes off.

The urge to turn away and busy yourself in order to keep yourself from staring is ludicrous – you’ve seen him naked more times than you can count. That's how this all started after all. And yet you give in, fiddling with shampoo bottles in order to give him space.

“What? Don't tell me I've gotten so hideous you can't even look at me?” He calls out cheekily, hoping to lift the weight that had settled in the air between you.

“No!” You answer, turning to Aventurine just as he pulls his shirt over his head, not even bothering with the buttons. Eyes yearn to linger on the hills and valleys of his alabaster skin, but they instead settle on the brand at the side of his neck; ‘slave’ it reads. That was the topic of your first argument. Or what could have become an argument if you’d pushed any further. “Not at al.”

Your eyes over him with such open fondness, knelt by the bath you prepared simply because you know he’s tired – Aventurine has to look away, lest he blurt out something he’ll regret.

The temperature of the water is just right and yet it seems to burn him, unknowingly cold as he’d become from the anxiety running through his veins, as if chastising him for taking so long to just say it; to bear it all to the person who’s cared for him the most in years; who’s seen through his lies and never pushed, gazed upon his scars and never questioned…

“...Riney?” He’s sitting in the water, straight as a rod, head down, hair over his eyes and you worry if the water’s too cold, or too hot, or if he has any injuries he forgot to tell you about. Your hand reaches to sweep his hair from his eyes, before it’s caught in his grasp, “Aventurine?”

He shakes his head slowly, his grip soft and yet trembling, “Please… don't call me that…”

“What… should I call you then?”

Silence.

A long silent moment of a million thoughts running through both your heads.

And then, like a stab through the heart, “Kakavasha.”

It’s not a word you recognize. The synesthesia beacon didn't translate it. It must be Avgin. His birth name.

“Kakavasha.” You repeat quietly, testing the pronunciation – hoping you’ve got it right.

His head snaps in your direction so quickly it makes you jump, seizing you by the shoulders, hands dripping warm water. Beauty eyes wide, pupils dilated, lovely lips agape, “Did I… say it wrong?”

“No it’s– it’s perfect. You’re just… the first person to say it in so long.” His hold on you eases.

“Talk to me.”

Kakavasha looks at you now and truly sees you, clearer than he ever has and wonders for a moment if you’re real at all. If he’s still a boy in a cage with a collar around his neck. He quickly decides that, no, you have to be real. His mind isn't so kind as to imagine something as lovely as you.

“I’m sure you know most of the story but,” his hands move through the water, scooping some onto his shoulders just to have something to do, “I’m from Sigonia-IV. I’m the last Avgin and my name is Kakavasha. There’s so much more I want to tell you. So much more you deserve to know. About my sister, my mother, how the IPC found me. But I don't know if I–” he looks down at his hands.

“You don't have to say it all right now. Just let it come out.” You get to rubbing his shoulders, processing the information and aligning it with what you’d inferred over your months together, “But… what exactly made you decide to tell me?”

He heaves a deep, tortured sigh – this is the hard part. As if admitting he’s the last of his species and giving you his real name wasn't hard enough.

“Penacony… turned into much more of a mess than I expected.” He considers his next words very carefully, unsure if it'd be more cruel to tell you or not to do so, “I was… expecting to die there.”

A sharp intake of breath passes through your lips, hands flinching away from his figure – it’s a lot to process but, somehow, someway, it’s not entirely surprising.

“Well, I’m very glad you were unsuccessful.” Your attempt at humor is transparently tinged with both love and fear, lips trembling at the thought… that he’d be gone. Without ever telling you any of this.

Without saying goodbye.

“What happened there… it’s all very confusing but it made me realize that I wanted someone to know who I am. On the inside.”

“I wanted you to know.”

“Me?” You question meekly, suddenly unsure. He’d always been a guarded man, beneath the surface that is.

His hands rise out of the water again to cradle your face in warm, wet palms, beautiful singular irises boring into yours with a sincerity you’d thought him incapable of until an hour ago.

“There’s no one who deserves to know more than you.” 

Waterline burning with tears you move to kiss his forehead amongst wet strands of gold, lips linger to ensure that he is real, he is here with you, opening up in a way so seemingly impossible it makes you a little dizzy.

“I guess we have to start somewhere… Tell me about your sister.”

The air between you is forever changed, both lighter and heavier somehow. But also brighter, warmer, like the gentle sun rising over the deserts of Sigonia-IV. 

Everytime he speaks of his family, he gets a dazzling glimmer in his eyes, like he’s a boy again, playing with his sister, carefree and gentle.

And when he speaks of what came later, it’s lost, his expression turns sour and grim, like he’s in that cage again, doing everything to get out. He’s no less handsome with that expression as any other. In fact, the more you learn, the more you realize that losing him would’ve broken you. The depth of his clever mind, the fondness of his gaze, the shining sincerity of real laugh. It would be a shame to lose it all.

He blushes red as a rose when you tell him, suddenly upon a random morning, unprepared and for the first time in a long time, unwilling to raise his walls at your assault on his fragile, vulnerable heart.

One day he’ll tell you how his heart thunders in his chest like it might burst right out and leap into your own chest to meet yours, when you say his name so softly.

Kakavasha.

[catboybrain]

i dunno if its just who im following rn but im really rocked lately by all the division btwn transfems and transmascs on my dash... where is this coming from .?

[papanowo]

i think dan should get to be a little weird too. as a treat

[al-luviec]

I got so insanely mad while drawing this

+ closeup and normalness

[ganondoodle]

i often really do feel like an .. unwanted part of the fandom, i dont draw beautiful landscapes, i have unpopular but strong opinions im constantly annoying about and rarely change, dont like/dont draw the pretty young popular twinks and hot gurls to fanboi over nor do i turn characters into one, the opposite moreso, draw only one ship no ones heard of really, got little energy to interact with the few people that are nice to me and send me asks so it probably looks like im ignoring everyone and unfortunately but still rarely get so stressed i get overwhelmed and emotional about pehaps seemingly minor things and spiral almost into a breakdown feeling super embarrassed about it afterwards but the damage is already done and i look like a freak or agressive weirdo

[icewindandboringhorror]

I've referenced before how I have a big google document to keep track of every media I've ever seen in my entire life (just for reference because I like to track everything possible lol… I am the Data Collector), but recently as I was updating it, I thought of actually evaluating them to find out random percentages (like for example, out of Total Shows Watched, what percentage did I finish vs. stop watching, what percentage did I like or dislike, etc.)...

Evaluating these things is made easier by the fact that I already place everything on each subsection of the list into 6 broad ranking categories, so I don't have to go back and guess to figure out how I feel about them or anything. The categories are: Ranking 5 - overall best* (despite some criticisms of course because I'm too much of an Analyzer to ever find anything Perfect lol) Ranking 4 - more positive than neutral, but not good enough to be 5 Ranking 3 - either the good + bad negate each other, OR it's just not memorable/interesting in any way enough to be ranked higher or lower (this is the Default category ALL things are placed in if no other rank applies) Ranking 2 - maybe a few redeemable elements but largely more negatives than positives Ranking 1 - So bad that it circles around to being fascinating to observe in some way (not necessarily Funny, or Good, but just interesting somehow) Ranking 0 - Bad in a genuinely frustrating or obnoxious manner

*("best" primarily defined here as most interesting, rather than most good in a technical sense, or some other measure. I tend to value more highly whether there's something novel or thoughtful about the worldbuilding, tone, writing, base premise, etc - than about whether it's actually executed perfectly.)

And here's the amount of shows that have so far been placed into each category -

TV shows ~ Rank 5 (highest) - 20 shows ~ Rank 4 (mid-high) - 28 shows ~ Rank 3 (neutral/default/meh) - 114 shows ~ Rank 2 (mid low) -33 shows ~ Rank 1 (low low but intriguingly so) - 14 shows ~ Rank 0 (iredeemably low) - 2 shows

This would make for a total of 211 TV shows overall. However, there are 57 shows within these list marked as "didn't finish" (typically meaning I quit on the very first or second episode - but log them still to keep a record that I at least had a brief view of them).

So my total of genuinely fully watched shows would be more 154. 211 Total, but a More Accurate Total of 154.

Counting them all and using the Total Number Of The List (211) -- that means roughly 9.5% of all total shows I have ever watched (or at least attempted to watch) have been Mostly Good, 13% have been Moderately Okay, 54% have been either entirely Forgettable or some mix of good + bad that lands them right in the Neutral Middle, 15.6% have been Mostly Bad, 6.6% have been Bad (but in an interesting way), and 0.9% have been Terribly Bad.

Additionally, I didn't even get past the first two episodes of about 27% of the total.

Sooo, discounting ones I didn't finish, my total TV shows ever watched in my life would be about 154 (maybe give or take a few, assuming I might have forgotten some from very long ago).

But instead of entire life, let's just say this is the total for 'About 20 Years' (so, not counting very early childhood when I likely wouldn't remember things I saw/have no detailed recollection of them (like for example, I'm sure at some point when I was like 4yrs old I must have seen an episode of Spongebob or something, but I have zero distinct memories of it, can't quote anything of it, and barely recall the premise - so I don't count it on the list, etc.)).

In that case, 154 divided by 20 would be roughly 7.7 shows a year.

Which is actually surprisingly low considering that I often have stuff on in the background for hours whilst I make sculptures and do costumes and stuff (maybe I should have also marked some distinction between 'things I fully paid attention to' and 'things I kind of half listened to whilst sculpting', but that would further split the categories too much probably lol), but I guess a lot of that is youtube videos or random documentaries, so .. eh.. maybe I get it being lower.

Now, doing the same thing for movies-

Movies ~ Rank 5 (highest) - 4 movies (3.4% of total) ~ Rank 4 (mid-high) - 12 movies (10.3% of total) ~ Rank 3 (neutral/default/meh) - 91 movies (78.4% of total) ~ Rank 2 (mid low) - 8 movies (6.8% of total) ~ Rank 1 (low but interesting) - 1 movie (0.8% of total) ~ Rank 0 (irredeemably low) - none in this category (0%)

That makes 116 for a Total (Actually Remembered) Movies Watched In Lifetime (Or At Least In 20 Years).

116 divided by 20 is roughly 5 or 6 movies a year (I feel this has probably been skewed though by adding everything since like elementary school onwards, as I remember a lot more movies from child/teen years.. Whereas, the past 3 years I feel like I've barely seen maybe even 5 movies?? lol). I also have "Didn't Finish" marked on 18 of them. Which means I quit halfway through about 15% of the total movies.

So, a for broader summary stuff..

I seem to be less forgiving to movies than tv shows, by far. Which makes sense to me, I guess, because I love elaboration and details, so "short form" things that only last an hour or two are often lost on me a bit. My biggest complaint with movies is indeed usually walking away just wishing there had been more exposition, more scenes where characters are doing nothing, more "mindless bantering" conversations, more Quiet Downtime and Lore Elaboration and so on lol, so... of course most 1-2hr films end up feeling a bit Not Enough To Draw My Interest/Nothingy to me.

If you count 5 and 4 as "like" and rankings 2 to 0 as "dislike", then for TV shows I at least somewhat liked 48 of them, and at least somewhat disliked 47 of them.. So it's almost exactly the same lol. I'm just about equally as likely to find something bad as I am to find something redeeming about it. But overall, the largest chance is that I just won't really care much for it at all and it will be tossed into the 'neutral' pile, forgotten forever. Movies have a bit better of a balance, "liking" 16 of them, and "disliking" only 9 of them. So I'm slightly more likely to enjoy a movie than to find it annoying - though still VASTLY more likely to just not find it anything in particular, possibly not even finishing it.

ANYWAY.. this is vague and literally pointless, but like I said, I just really find information fun. Like my document where I've rated every apple flavor I've ever tried (like 40 of them now?), or reviewed every oreo flavor (32?), or ranking data from my entire 10 years of Trying To Make Friends process (out of 100 people, roughly 8% chance of a moderate compatibility, 3% chance of high), or etc. etc.. I love to have random pointless things to analyze I suppose lol.

I doubt anyone tracks things in their life in this same exact way, but I'd be interested in hearing any at least somewhat similar data !!! (like, how many TV shows you watch a year on average, and what percentage of those you like vs. dislike (if you keep track of that sort of thing), etc.)). I guess it might be easier with movies, since I think some people use those websites where you curate a list of movies you've seen and you can rate them or something, so maybe the numbers are already available on those places. :0

[froschli96]

you know, i always find it really funny when dudebros complain about syndicate and odyssey being too "jokey" or not "taking its characters seriously" or whatever…

like, did y'all collectively sleep through "it's-a me, mario!", "i meant besides vaginas", ezio inventing the latte, bartolomeo's... just... *gestures vaguely* entire character, etc?

like, it's fine to have preferences of course, i myself prefer a more serious and grounded tone, but these are usually the same people who tout the ezio trilogy as "peak assassin's creed", call ac1 a glorified tech demo and hate on connor for being "too serious and boring", like? make it make sense!

[dadbastiandisaster]

Oh shit it’s finally done

This is fanart for the incredible, amazing, heart-warming-and-wrenching (it has range) Coattails by @pain-in-the-butler which you can read here. It’s one of the best fanfics I’ve read ever, every chapter is an absolute delight, all the characters are so in-character and also so well and interestingly utilised, and if you haven’t read it you absolutely should. It will recover the years of your life that the season 2 rewatch everyone was doing at one point took off you.

So, I am a horse girl, I love horses, and I actually don’t mind drawing them, so obviously I had to do fanart of Ciel with the Irish and Avalon in chapter 23. The horses are truly one of the highlights of this fic: Ciel’s interactions with them are so sweet, and Sebastian’s are usually quite amusing.

Also this did take me literally forever because I took up cross-stitch and then life kept happening and also I struggled with horse shading for some reason

[ratatatastic]

the rituals are intricate

florida panthers @ new york islanders | 10.26.24 (x)

[pkmoth]

having swap au thoughts. *slaps roof of claus* there's so much mental illness in this guy. im gonna blow up everyone in the room and then myself

[jd-loves-fiction]

For the Contes de Fées, i would like to ask for Azul, then you first meet him. Sfw or nsfw its up to you in the happy ending. (I dont feel like crying today lmao)

Gn reader if possible, you know who this is~

-🐙🐕

💐This one turned out quite shot but I'm losing steam fast :( hope you enjoy it hun!! ❤️

❧ A simple bargain

❧ When the sky had turned dreadfully dark, you should've turned tail and ran. But what hope did you have of outrunning a storm so close.

So you prepared for the worst and prayed. Before you knew it, you'd been thrown overboard so roughly, you were out before even hitting the water.

To survive would have been a miracle – one you did not believe in. And yet, you feel the tug of consciousness against the back of your head hours later, back upon cool rock and the scent of something cooking invading your nose.

You come to slowly and with much effort, regaining use of each of your limbs with slight twitches until they finally listen to your commands. Sitting up seems an impossible feat as you’re left gasping just from trying.

“Welcome back, captain.” The sudden greeting makes you double your efforts of standing up to know who saved you, though the silky voice is entirely unfamiliar.

When you succeed, you turn toward where the voice had come from to see a smartly dressed man tending to a pot.

You blink your eyes purposefully, making sure your eyes do not deceive you. The man is pale as birch, with hair like strands of silver and a smile that spells trouble without a doubt. It’s still not clear to you if you are truly awake.

“How– Who–?” Your voice fails you, raspy and as broken as you feel – aching down to your very bones, skin both cold and clammy and a strange taste in your mouth.

“Don't strain yourself, captain. Keeping you alive through the night was not at all easy and I’d hate for my efforts to be wasted before you can pay me back.” The man speaks with the practiced ease of a slimy businessman, though he must be nothing of the sort given the way his pale skin catches the light in such an mesmerizing way… plus the fact that the cave you find yourselves in has no entrance besides a pool of dark seawater.

“Who are you?”

“My name is Azul, though I respond to ‘savior’ just as well.” He finally seems to give you his full attention, only to give you a cheeky response.

“How do I know you’re not lying about saving me?”

“Do you see anyone else here?” He gestures around himself in a wide, dramatic arc and from that movement alone you can tell he’s going to be a pain in the neck.

“How do you know who I am? Why did you save me?” Questions rush out of you like a waterfall as your senses finally return to you in full. You’re head is spinning and aching, trying to make sense of what you know happened, where you are, who he could possibly be–

“So many questions… you’re lucky I’m a patient man.” Azul heaves a long-suffering sigh, standing from his stone seat to move closer to you, making you tense up, “I know who you are because I’ve been watching you and I saved you because I believed you’d be of use to me were we to make a deal. Which we will, once you get your bearings.” He stands a mere two steps from where you sit, back straight as a rod and spewing such overconfident nonsense you fear he might’ve seen the future to be so sure. If not for the way his fingers twitch at his sides, anxious.

“You sound so sure, and yet you don't look it.” He seems stunned at the accusation, subtly flinching in surprise. Seems you're more shrewd than he expected. 

“There's always a degree of assumption or probability to deals such as these. I tend to avoid falling into blind confidence.” He pulls himself together so quickly that your weakened mind accepts it without question.

“What's this about a deal?” You bring a hand up to your aching forehead – dealing with businessmen is an endeavor guaranteed to give you a headache every time.

“I saved your life, so now there's the matter of how you'll pay me back.” Azul states simply, almost patiently – if you were to take his words at face value.

“Right. Can't I just pay you back?”

“I have plenty of money. There's something much more valuable that I want from you.” That can't be good.

You wait for him to name his price himself, but he simply looks at you expectantly – how dramatic, “What would that be?”

“Your heart.”

“...What?”

[chocottang]

the more i think abt goldica the more i like it

[faaun]

i feel rly sad and conflicted abt one of my best friends on earth but idk who to ask for advice bc i usually would have consulted her in this situation lmao

[ayyponine]

not to be a milennial but harry potter and the prisoner of azkaban really is that bitch....

[sonknuxadow]

sorry but i really really do Not like the ideas people have of sonic actually liking amy back and being too shy to admit it. or that sonic SHOULD agree to be amys boyfriend because amy "deserves it after waiting for so long" and by not doing that sonic is mean or immature or leading her on. or that yeah sonic isnt interested Now but they Will get married as adults. or whatever people go around saying.

for the entire time amy was actually open about her crush and trying to get sonic to date her he would almost always either outright reject her or just not say anything but still obviously be uncomfortable or annoyed by it. to say that he actually has always liked her or that he Should like her just feels like youre saying his feelings of not being interested in amy or romance in general arent valid and are a problem that needs to be fixed. that he MUST be with amy just because she likes him and he needs to get over any discomfort he has with the idea because he doesnt have a choice. its like people are so obsessed with shipping that theyre ignoring sonics feelings or at the very least prioritizing amys over his . Hello can anyone hear me