#its kinda funny i met with a cousin at the social and she was like

[bucephaly]

It really is frustrating and a little funny how like... people will know full well that cherokee princess great grandma stories exist and aren't true. And that fake family stories in general exist. But people will be So sure that Theirs is the exception and is true for whatever reason, be it that they arent white, it doesn't say 'princess', it has a 'reasonable' story with it like 'they were adopted by a white family' or 'they hid and changed their names', they have photos of someone with tan skin, their family has 'high cheekbones, their dad went to powwows, etc etc etc there are so so many random things people use to justify these stories. Like ok, but do you know this ancestors name? Do you know where they were born? Do you know what year the trail of tears happened??? Do you know anything about cherokee history at all besides the trail of tears is an event that happened? Cuz honestly a chunk of these stories can be at least partially debunked with no genealogy just because the time period or location isn't right. Like 'my cherokee great grandma was sent to a residential school' she was born in Kentucky and continued to live in kentucky?? 'My great grandma told me she was on the trail of tears' the trail was 186~ years ago how old are you??? It's like. Can you do Any Tiny Bit of actual research into our history. If it's a big enough deal to you that you feel the need to talk about it whenever anything native or cherokee comes up, you can do the research I promise

[pynkhues]

literally sooo fascinated by logan and caroline's marriage tbh. give us all your thoughts!! (if you want ahah)

Oh, man, I could talk about them all day, haha. I kinda feel like people can sometimes rob both Caroline and Logan of any nuance, because yeah, sure, they’re often the central antagonists of the series, and their abuse and neglect of their children permeates the series, but the show’s always also been careful to show that the cycle of violence never started with Logan, and Harriet Walter’s talked in interviews too about the cycle of neglect not starting with Caroline either. They’re victims and perpetrators in the same way that Kendall, Roman and Shiv are victims and perpetrators, and the fact that neither of them were able to break that cycle is the exact sort of tragedy that's at the broken heart of this series.

It makes it really fascinating to me in that sense that Caroline and Logan found each other at all, and I think really slots into what we know about his three marriages – namely, that he marries women who are in some ways as damaged by life’s cruelties as he is. We understand that explicitly with Marcia, who pretty much says out loud that their connection has been born out of the fact that they’re both survivors, but I think it’s implied in his relationships with both Caroline and Connor’s mother too. At least Marcia and Connor’s mother became somethink like partners for a while too – Marcia was a co-conspirator with Logan for the bulk of season 1, and the RECNY Ball episode I think also showed that Connor’s mother, for at least a while, was the sort of socialite who could lubricate and work politicians alongside Logan.

We don’t really know what role Caroline played in that sense, but she’s obviously intelligent and savvy enough to have worked to secure the kids real power in the divorce, something we see her give back to Logan in 3.09. We also know that her title gave Logan the class elevation that he wanted (even if its one he also seems to bitterly resent), and that his money gave her security, and in a lot of ways, that’s a strategic match that sees them both step forwards in power together.

I was actually listening to an old episode of Vanity Fair’s Succession podcast recently where they interviewed Dame Harriet Walter, and she talks quite a lot about Caroline’s backstory.

She says that Caroline was born into a neglectful aristocratic family, an only daughter who due to the social structures of British aristocracy, wouldn’t have inherited her father’s estate as a result of her gender. Instead, his estate would’ve gone to a distant male cousin, which ties into what Connor says in 1.09 to Willa about the house being the ancestral home Caroline didn't inherit.

She was disregarded by her family but encouraged to marry rich, and she sees Caroline as having gone through a bit of a wild child phase, that she partied, used drugs, tried to escape herself. That she was probably featured frequently in the social columns ‘in disgrace’, and then married young to a rich British man who bored her. She sees Caroline as having escaped to New York on a trip, and met Logan who dazzled her. Who was the opposite of the men she’d grown up with, the men who’d cut her out of her own inheritance, and that he was exciting and creating something and married too, and that they likely left their spouses for each other. That he married for a title, but he also married her because he found her fun and funny and different from the other women of her class and station.

I actually love that backstory a lot, and in particular I think it feeds into the themes of cycles on this show, both with Shiv, but also in Caroline being cut out by her own family, and then cut out by the one she tried to make for herself, and the damage that likely caused her. It also I think really beautifully depicts this idea of legacy and succession which is so crucial to the show – that Logan can spend a childhood brutalised by a man who’d give him just enough to build an empire on and that Caroline can spend a childhood in luxurious neglect with parents who will leave her with nothing.

What that meant for their relationship - - I think they did love each other, as much as they could love anyone, and I think that vulnerability between them was something that probably allowed them as true an intimacy as they’d ever have for a while. I also think that that vulnerability and that intimacy gave them power over one another that they’d use often and likely cruelly, and that the final years of their marriage were probably torturous for both of them.

After all, at the end of the day, Logan had the wealth Caroline could marry but never inherit, and Caroline had the title Logan could marry but never inherit, and what is that if not a reminder of the poisoned soil they sprung from?

[louiseleblancdiggory]

okay but what about a 'The Way I Loved You' by TS Au for Rowaelin with Punk!Rowan?? pretty please??

A/N: The way I rushed to post this. I have a bunch of fanfics to write before October is over, and now that I’m finally not sick anymore, I’ve been trying to rush and write them but this prompt.....

The Way I Loved You

--

“So I’ll pick you up at seven, right?”

Aelin smiled, nodding. “Yeah, seven is perfect.”

Chaol smiled back, putting a hand on her back as he bent down to kiss her. Even though she knew she shouldn’t, Aelin tensed slightly. She had been dating Chaol for three months now, and it wasn’t that kissing him made her uncomfortable, it was just different.

For two and a half years, she had been used to kissing a different guy.

A guy she could feel the stare at the back of her head.

Chaol withdrew, still smiling at her. Aelin forced a smile to appear on her lips, giving him a quick peck on the lips before taking a step back. She needed to go to her class, and even though she didn’t let herself turn around to confirm, she knew Rowan was still staring at her.

Part of her could understand the staring. They had broken up four months ago, and Aelin rushed to find someone new. Not to throw it at his face that she could, but just because she had felt so fucking bad at the end of their relationship, that she figured that the best cure was to jump right back at another one. It kinda worked most of the time. The other part of her, the part that felt like the solution wasn’t working out perfectly, wished he would just start ignoring her existence. Would stop looking at her, being in the same room that she was.

Preferably, stop being in the same continent that she was.

As she left the senior lounge— pointedly not looking back— she let her mind wander to months and months back when all this tension didn’t exist. Aelin had known Rowan since forever. He had been at her class from elementary school until high school, and she knew that they were also going to the same college when they graduated in two months. Until sophomore year of high school, though, Aelin had never exchanged more than three words with him. They had been different at everything their entire lives, and so both never showed any interest in having a single conversation with one another. In elementary school, while Aelin focused on the art classes, Rowan only ever showed a human reaction during music class. In middle school while she was part of every single club she could find, Rowan had been too busy avoiding every club that could find him. In high school, while Aelin dedicated her life to her grades, being cheer captain and part of the volleyball team, Rowan simply worked towards paying off his motorcycle, working at Lorcan’s dad’s mechanic shop, and almost getting arrested every now and then.

Honestly, it had been a miracle that they even knew about each other’s existence.

The only reason they actually met was because of Chemistry. Aelin had absolute no interest in the subject, but since her mother had been bothering her to take it, she relented during her second year of high school. As she had chosen to take it in advanced placement, they had a whole period of the normal class plus the addition of half a period of laboratory. To her chagrin at the time, she got paired up for the labs with the single person in the whole class she wasn’t friends with.

Rowan fucking Whitethorn.

She found some comfort in realizing that he was just as excited to work with her as she was to work with him, but since he was always polite during the labs, she didn’t find a reason to dislike him. He was coldly neutral, and, surprisingly, a fucking genius. If it hadn’t been for him, Aelin would have bombed every single lab, quiz and test they had in that godforsaken class.

Despite both of their reputations, Aelin found out that she had more in common with him than it looked, and that she also liked him a lot more than she would have ever thought. When comfortable around people, he was actually pretty chill and funny. One of the biggest things that made her befriend him, though, was the fact that he didn’t fucking care about anything that didn’t concern him. Rumors? He was too busy for that. Reputations? Nope. Social status? Couldn’t care less.

While so many people in the school saw her as an athletic bimbo, Rowan met her with absolute 0 preconceptions because he never fucking cared about them. Since the beginning, he met Aelin for who she really was, and not the person everyone at the school had a different perception of.

Maybe this was one of the reasons she fell so deeply in love with him.

Things had been normalish. They didn’t know about each other, they met, became friends and then started dating. Nothing too out of the ordinary.

The dating though.

Dating Rowan had been… wild. Not in the bad sense, no. It had been like a roller-coaster all the time. Like driving down an empty highway at 150 per hour, windows open, and screaming your lungs out. It had been fun, and it had made her feel so alive that she could still feel it when she closed her eyes. It had made her blood boil, every single nerve jump. And yet, at the same time, being with him never made her feel so calm, so comfortable. Rowan was what shook her world, but also what made her feel steady.

Loving Rowan Whitethorn had been the biggest adventure of her life.

Their relationship had been the perfect mixture of actual love and burning passion.

The passion was sometimes almost blinding, and it made her do things she would have never though she’d have the courage to do. Rowan encouraged her to push her limits— always safely, he’d make sure of that—, and Aelin enjoyed her life to the maximum. They went on a trip across the east coast on his motorcycle during the summer, went bungee jumping at the neighboring state to celebrate his birthday, and skydiving to celebrate hers. Aelin had asked her dad once, at two in the morning, to take her to the police station to bail Rowan out after he punched someone hard enough to make the other guy black out. The fact Aelin’s dad hadn’t killed her and Rowan after it had been a miracle.

The love, though, the love was her favorite part. Loving Rowan was so easy and so different from what she thought loving someone would be. She always thought that love was that blinding emotion, that easy thing that made you burn from inside out, but no. That was passion, and while it was good, love was… more. Loving him had been like sitting at a beach in the end of the afternoon, the wind on her face and the disappearing sun still warming your skin. Loving hadn’t make her feel like combusting, it had made her feel like home. It wasn’t always easy to be in love all the time, but she also found out that the hardships made part of loving.

Love, she learned, was choosing someone every day, the good and the bad, even when you didn’t feel like it. Love wasn’t always perfect, but it was always worth it.

But they fought. Oh, they fought a lot. Despite Rowan’s careless behavior, he was just as stubborn as she was. Their fights had always been filled with screaming, always making her blood boil in a different way. Even when fighting with him, Aelin had never felt more alive. In the end, however, most of their fights were stupid. They never fought about serious shit, and the screaming matches were usually about fucking nothing. They both had been too stubborn to see this, too stubborn to admit that both were usually wrong

The denial was what broke everything.

Aelin didn’t think Rowan would actually think they were breaking up. It was another one of their stupid screaming matches, and Aelin blurted out the first thing that came to her mind. She had been too proud to say she didn’t mean it, and so things ended because of nothing.

She could still see the whole scene. Could still see Rowan going still, narrowing his eyes and then shrugging as if it was nothing. Could still see him leaving. Could still hear her heart breaking. She knew since that instant that she should have gone after him.

She didn’t. He should have known.

And now he would be staring at her every now and then, would be like a fucking buzzard over her life.

“Hello, Earth to Aelin.” She felt a hand on her shoulder, a hand snapping its fingers in front of her face. She snapped back to reality, raising her head to stare at her cousin’s face. Her best friend, Lysandra, was by his side, staring at her with as much concern as Aedion was. “You ok?”

Aelin shook away from his grip, forcing a smile to her lips. “Never been better.”

————

Aelin waved Chaol goodbye, waiting until his car left her driveway to get inside the house.

She sighed, dropping her shoes down as she walked quietly to the kitchen. It was almost two in the morning, and she didn’t want to wake her parents.

Despite her efforts to keep quiet, she couldn’t help the scream that left her mouth when she turned on one of the kitchen lights and saw her father sitting there.

She put a hand to her chest, trying to calm her racing heart. “What the hell?”

“Was that necessary?” Rhoe asked, a smirk on his face.

Aelin scowled. “Why are you sitting in the dark?”

“Makes it all more dramatic.” Her dad shrugged, and Aelin rolled her eyes. She walked to one of the cabinets, taking out a bottle of water. “Aelin.”

She turned at her father’s tone, frowning when she saw his expression. “You’re the one that said no curfew.”

Rhoe shook his head, patting the seat by his side. “Come here, firefly.”

Aelin set the bottle down, cautiously sitting by her father’s side. He had a strange expression on his face, body somewhat tense. “What happened?”

“You like Chaol?”

Aelin frowned at the question, scoffing a little. “Yeah, he’s my boyfriend.”

“You used to have a different boyfriend.” Her dad said, and Aelin understood what the conversation was about.

“Seriously, dad?” She went on the defensive immediately, crossing her arms. “That was months ago. And I thought you didn’t even like Rowan.”

Rhoe actually laughed, a serene smile on his face. “Nah, I actually liked the kid. Despite the motorcycle, the black clothes, constant scowl, and the criminal record, he was a nice guy. And he made you happy. What else a father could wish?”

“Someone who doesn’t have a criminal record?”

Rhoe shrugged. “It’s not like I didn’t agree with him that time I had to take you to bail him out. Some guy harassed Lysandra, Rowan punched them.”

“You sound almost appreciative.” Aelin said, still on the defensive even though a small part of her smiled internally.

Rhoe smiled knowingly. “I am.”

Aelin scoffed, but didn’t say nothing in return. Her father let her gather her thoughts, and both sat in silence for a few minutes before Aelin said quietly. “Chaol is a nice guy.”

Her dad nodded. “He is.”

“He seems easy to love.”

Rhoe got up, pressing a kiss to his daughter’s hair. “No one is easy to love, firefly. That’s one of the main points of loving. We value it so much because it is hard to find, because it is hard to keep.” Aelin raised her head to look at her dad, and he smiled at her. “I’m not telling you what to do. You’re grown enough to take your own decisions. I’m also not telling you to go to a bad relationship, not in the slightest. If I thought something was harmful to you, I’d be the first intervening. But have in mind that people fight sometimes. Gods, me and your mother when we were younger? Like fucking cat and dog.”

Aelin huffed a laugh, vaguely remembering the stories her parents told her.

“But,” Rhoe continued. “It gets better with time, and I think you know that. You get more mature, learn to admit when you’re wrong. I remember when you and Rowan were younger and fought about everything, and yet it got better and better with time. The two of you barely argued during the last year.”

“I know.” Aelin whispered, resting her face against her father’s chest. He hugged her, rubbing her back like he used to when she was younger. She knew that he was right. Despite the fact that she argued a lot with Rowan, Aelin also knew that it had gotten much better. They fought less, and the reason of the arguments never got worse. It was usually childish and they’d laugh about it in the following morning. “I didn’t mean to actually break up with him. I never though he’d think I would break up with him over something so stupid.”

Even though she was whispering, Rhoe heard her. “I know.”

“And I should have told him that.”

“Yes, you should have.”

“I was wrong.”

“You were.”

“I’m not going back to him, though.” Aelin said, some stubbornness still in her. Rowan had absolutely left that day, and didn’t give her the chance to explain afterwards. They were apart for her fault, yes, but he wasn’t the saint in all this.

Rhoe groaned. “Really, Ace?”

Aelin crossed her arms. “He was very comfortable with the breakup. Why should I bother?”

“This whole conversation was for nothing?” Her dad crossed his arms, shaking his head.

“Not for nothing. I know now that I need to stop things with Chaol. I shouldn’t have even started dating him if I wasn’t going to commit completely.” Aelin raised her head to look at her dad. “Gosh, I’m a terrible person.”

“No, you’re young. Young people fuck up sometimes.” Rhoe kissed her head one more time before he started to walk out of the kitchen. He didn’t try to bring up going back to Rowan again, knowing that it would only make her more keen on not doing so. “But now that you recognize this, I hope you fix it. I didn’t raise you to be a liar, let that be by lying to others or to yourself.”

“Gods, you could have ended this conversation a little more lightly.”

Rhoe turned his face around, smiling at her. “Fix it, firefly.”

————

“Aelin? What happened? I left you at your house twenty minutes ago.” Chaol said, rubbing his eyes. He obviously was going to sleep already, and Aelin felt bad about doing this in the middle of the night but she had to get everything done already.

“I can’t do this.” She blurted out, an apologetic look on her face. “I’m so sorry.”

“What?”

“This. Us.” She signaled in between them. “I juts can’t.”

Chaol took a step forward, a frown on his face. “We’re going too fast? I can go in whatever pace you want but—“

“I know this is gonna sound like a shit excuse but it’s really not you, it’s me.” She said, cringing. It was terrible that she used the oldest breaking up method in the book, but it was true.

“Really, Aelin?” He crossed his arms, face morphing into anger. “This bullshit excuse?”

“I understand you’re mad, but I’m really, really sorry. I don’t want to lead you on, and you’re so nice and deserves someone who is completely willing to make the relationship work.” Aelin said pleadingly. “It’s not anything you did or didn’t do, I’m just—“

She wanted to feel as if her heart was breaking, but not even that. Instead, she was feeling relieved. The feeling angered her to no end. She should have been able to fall in love with a perfectly nice and calm guy, but Rowan’s presence had become like a ghost in her life and not even that was possible anymore.

“Not interested.” He finished, voice full of scorn. “If I’m oh so nice, why are you breaking up with me?”

“I—“ Aelin hesitated, not wanting to even mention Rowan. “I just can’t. I can’t be with you.”

“With me specifically.” Chaol said, grounding his jaw. After a second of silence, he let out an incredulous laugh. “Oh, I should have expected that. I’m the very nice guy, and yet you prefer the fucking asshole that Whitethorn is.”

Aelin felt a pang of anger. Of course Cahol would think that. “I’m really sorry. You are a nice guy, it’s really nothing with you.”

“Why don’t you just leave?” Chaol said, already closing the door. “And stay away from me.”

Aelin had the feeling that he didn’t want to hear to any more excuses, and so she just gave him another apologetic look before turning around and going back to her car.

Although breaking up with Chaol had been bad, she knew it wasn’t gonna be the worst part of her night because at that moment, Aelin was pissed enough to want to pick a fight.

And she knew exactly who she was going to pick it with.

As she drove to the apartment Rowan shared with Lorcan and his dad, Aelin went over and over what she was going to say when she got there. Knowing both her personality and Rowan’s, she knew that things would go south very quickly.

Her hands were sweating as she went up the stairs of the four stories building, fingers flexing over and over again as she gathered courage to knock on the door.

Part to her relief, part to her disappointment, no one answered. She knocked again. And again. And again.

On the sixth knock, the door opened violently, and Aelin found herself staring up at Lorcan Salvaterre.

His pissed off face quickly morphed into confusion, and he crossed his arms, leaning against the door frame. “Bimbo?”

Even being all pissed, Aelin rolled her eyes. Lorcan hadn’t like her in the beginning, but now both were actually close friends. Breaking up with Rowan made them separate a little, but good to know that he still liked her enough to use that stupid nickname. “Bully boy.”

Lorcan scoffed. “What have I done to deserve such visit at two in the morning?”

“Where’s Rowan?”

Lorcan tried to contain a smirk. “Why should I tell you?”

“Cause I’m your friend.”

“Nah, not good enough.” He said, letting the smirk appear. Aelin let out a breath, crossing her arms impatiently. “What do you want with him?”

“To talk.”

“You mean scream.”

“To talk.”

“About?”

“Stuff.”

Lorcan’s sarcastic smirk was widening more and more. “What stuff?”

“You’re fucking insufferable. Where’s Rowan?”

Lorcan let out a half cruel laugh. “ Don’t spew fire, baby. He’s in the shop, moping around while you go out with your jock boyfriend.”

Aelin rolled her eyes. “Thanks, could have said that a minute ago.”

“Nah.” Lorcan said, already closing the door. “Fix this mess. Rowan already has a shit mood, and it has only been worse for three months now.”

“You’re one to talk about bad mood.”

“Fuck off, Galathynius.” Lorcan said through the closed door, but Aelin was already rushing down the steps. The mechanic shop was by the end of the street, and she almost ran there.

The storefront was all dark, but the garage door was slightly open, light filtering through the opening. Without further thinking, Aelin crouched, entering through the opened bottom.

“Rowan.” Aelin said, crossing her arms.

Rowan immediately whipped his head around to look at her, eyes narrowing when he noticed her expression. “Why do I feel like you think I did something wrong?”

Despite all the planning, Aelin’s mind was blank. It was the first time she spoke to him in months. “I hate that we dated.”

Rowan let out a laugh, resting against the hood of a car. “You came all the way here, at two in the morning, to tell me that? The dedication is on point, Ace. But shouldn’t you have someone else to talk?”

Oh, he was jealous. Aelin could feel it in his voice. “You’re an idiot.”

“I’m the idiot?” Rowan crossed his arms. “If so, you should really get back to Prince Charming.”

“He’s nice.” Aelin said for some reason. When Rowan raised his eyebrows in mocked interest, she felt her blood boiling. It was because of this fucking asshole she couldn’t date anyone else. “He’s sensible and incredible.”

“Oh, I’m sure he is. All your single friends must be swooning over your relationship.” Although he was smiling, Aelin didn’t think he was finding any of that funny.

“And he calls me when he says he will. My mom thinks he’s nice, and today when he came to pick me up, he even talked to dad about business.”

“Really? I’m sure Rhoe and Evalin adore him.”

“He respects my space and limits, never asks me to wait. I, comfortable and I literally couldn’t ask for anything better.” The last lie tasted bitter on her tongue, but she didn’t take anything back.

“Wow, that sounds... fucking boring.” Rowan said, simply and with a smile. “And I bet anything you want that you’re fucking bored.”

“Fuck off, Rowan.”

“No, you fuck off, Aelin.” Rowan said, getting up. “You break up with me, you move on, you come here. And for fucking what?”

“You seemed very content in me breaking up with you, so don’t play the high moral ground card.” She replied defensively. “You wanna know what I just did, Rowan? I broke up with my amazingly normal boyfriend because of you.”

Rowan raised his eyebrows, letting out a laugh. “Can’t say I’m sorry.”

“Fuck you!”

“The girl I have loved for years just came here to tell me she broke up with her boyfriend because she still likes me. I’m so very sorry if I’m not currently crying.”

“You left.” Aelin screamed, and Rowan’s smile disappeared. She pointed a finger at him, taking a step forward. “You fucking left me after the stupidest fight we ever had. You fucking shrugged as if dating me wasn’t that important and you. Fucking. Left.”

“You broke up with me, Aelin. What the hell was I supposed to do?” Rowan spread his arms, shouting back at her.

“I don’t fucking know, but you could have showed any emotion that didn’t seem like satisfaction. You could have picked up my calls the following day, and the day after that, and the day after that. Could have asked me if I was serious when I shouted something stupid during a stupid argument.” Aelin’s voice was normal again. “And then Chaol comes and you’re right. I’m fucking bored. He opens the door for me, says all the right things and I’m fucking bored. Even when I feel perfectly fine, I’m fucking bored. I’m bored because I’m hung up over a guy who fucking shrugged when I broke a relationship of years. You shrugged, left and ignored me for days. So you don’t get to be happy about all this.”

“Aelin—“

“No. No, I’m talking now because you didn’t let me do it. I loved you so fucking much and you knew it. Loving you was a goddamn roller coaster and you knew I enjoyed it. And that’s the whole point. You knew the way I loved you and you didn’t let me explain. You knew it and you left, and then ignored me. I’m not saying this is your fault. It’s mine. I shouldn’t have screamed that I wanted to break up with you because I fucking didn’t, ok? I was fucking wrong, and we’re apart because of me. All I wanted was the chance to apologize. So now that you’re finally listening to me, you’re gonna let me apologize like it was the following morning.”

Aelin felt her heart beating fast, and when Rowan just stared at her in silence, she continued.

“I am so sorry I broke up with you. Of course I don’t mean it, and you’re acting like an idiot if you think I was for real. An absolute idiot because you should know I love you. You should know that I’d never break up with you over that. I’m so sorry that I even said that. I shouldn’t have, I let my temper get the best of me and shouted the first hurtful thing that came to my mind.” Aelin breathed in and out, trying to make her heart beat normally. “I’m sorry I even made you believe for a second I was for real. I never wanted to hurt you, and even though I hate the way you left, I understand. Please, please, forgive me and let’s go back to our normal.”

“Ace…”

“That was all I wanted to tell you when I called you a million times, Ro.” Aelin felt her throat twisting, the feeling of missing him for months hitting her straight to the chest. She knew she had been the wrong one in the situation, and even though she despised the way he left, Aelin knew Rowan enough to know that it was just a defense mechanism. “I didn’t even need you to accept me back, I just needed you to know that I was sorry and that I loved you. But you left and acted like everything was fine.”

“I’m sorry, Ace, I—“

“Gods, no. I don’t want you to apologize!” Aelin shook her head. Part of her wanted to hear it, the part that had been infuriated when ignored. The other part, however, the bigger part, didn’t want any apology. “I want you to accept the apology. And if you can’t do it, just say it and let me move on with my fucking life. Because if you can’t and this is it, I’ll have to move on with my fucking life. And I won’t bother you anymore.”

The whole room was silent, and Aelin was staring at Rowan as intently as he was staring right back at her. She could feel her heart beating, not fast anymore but so strongly she could hear it. Her palms were sweaty and, despite the fact that she hadn’t looked for Rowan with that intent in mind, she was hoping he’d accept the apology. That they’d talk and go back to being a normal fucking couple. A couple that no one really understood how it worked�� Aelin being cheer captain, in the volleyball team, and every single club she’d find while Rowan was one step away from biting someone’s arm off if they talked to him.

“I was hurt.” Rowan started.

“I know.”

“And angry. And I wasn’t thinking.”

Aelin nodded hope and fear mixing inside her chest. “I guessed.”

“For two years I was waiting for the day you decided to break up with him after you realized I just wasn’t it.”

Aelin frowned, confusion clouding her mind. “What?”

“Oh, come on, Ace.” Rowan scoffed. “We both know you can do better.”

Aelin crossed her arms, eye narrowing. “No.”

“That’s a shit response.”

“Why the fuck do you mean by do better? Dating is not a sport or subject, Ro.”

“Don’t play dumb.”

“I mean it, tho. There’s no doing better. I love you and it is what it is. Nowhere to improve, you’re the maximum for me already.”

Rowan stared at her in silence, and Aelin wanted to say something else, wanted to maybe hug him. But he hadn’t said everything was fine, so she didn’t want to overstep any boundaries. She hadn’t been lying, though. She never imagined there could be anyone better for her, Rowan was just… perfect. What she not only wanted, but also needed. He had never been a missing part of her, but always someone who added up to who she already was.

“I’m sorry I didn’t let you explain.” Rowan said quietly.

“I said I didn’t want an apology.”

Rowan nodded, taking a hesitant step forward. “I love you. Have for years, you know that.”

Aelin nodded, face neutral even though she could feel her whole body relaxing. Worry slowly left her veins, relief and happiness substituting it. “And I love you too. Have for years, you know that.”

Rowan walked slowly up to her, hesitating again before raising his hands to cup her face. Aelin almost sighed in relief. “I should have listened to you.”

Aelin nodded, hope washing her whole expression. “So we’re fine? You forgive me, and we’re like before?”

Rowan bushed his thumb against her cheek, a small smile on his lips. “Yeah, we’re fine and there’s nothing to forgive.”

Aelin felt her chest bursting when he said that. She threw her arms around his shoulders, standing on her tiptoes to press her lips against his. Kissing Rowan after months was like coming back home, his warm and soft lips moving against her almost hungrily. Aelin opened her mouth, letting Rowan deepen the kiss as she hugged him more tightly. Rowan’s hands hugged Aelin by her waist, pressing her body against his as his mouth moved gently and yet hurriedly against hers.

Against his mouth, Aelin half sighed, half moaned in sheer happiness. 

Tags:

@in-love-with-caramel-macchiato @jlinez @courtofjurdan @aelinfeyreeleven945tbln @ladywitchling @lexflame @sleeping-and-books @annejulianneh111 @perseusannabeth @linshryver @mu-si-ca-l @camilamartinezdunne @dank-queen7 @minaidss @starborn-faerie-queen @booksofthemoon @loveofbooksandwine @jesstargaryenqueen @bluejaberry @multifandommessblog @yesdreamblog @superspiritfestival @ireallyshouldsleeprn @woollycat22 @julemmaes @claralady @abookishfreak @faerie-queen-fireheart @maastrash @morganofthewildfire @queen-of-glass @heirofthenightcourt @booksbqueen @heirofthrnightcourt004

[deadcroisany]

Ephemeral|| FRED WEASLEY

Summary: Starting his first year at Hogwarts Hades Lestrange thought it was going to be peaceful and he would keep a low profile. But peaceful and low profile isn't in the twins' vocabulary, apparently.

                                                              ONE

Hades Lestrange was a quite boy who didn't like socializing. Well, its not that he had something against socializing. He just didn't like people and he preffered his own company a lot more, maybe that's why he would sometimes talk to himself, it was the only intelligent conversation he could have.

"In two hours" he whispered, his dark eyes following the tree line that disappeared at the speed of the Hogwarts Express.

It was his first year, he was alone and excited, even if it didn't show through the calm and apathetic expression on his young face.

It was weird that he was far away from his aunt and uncle, basically the people who had raised him along side his cousin, Draco. It was the good weird. His uncle and aunt, even if they never did anything to hurt him, where sometimes a bit too tiring with their pure blood beliefs that had reached a level of obsession.

It could be worse of course, he could be with his actual parents.

Two crazy murderers who were loyal followers of You- know- who. Especially his mother, Bellatrix, he had never met the woman but he knew two things about her:

One, they looked alike and two, she was bonkers and not in the fun way.

He followed the outlines of the mountains in peaceful silence and if he knew that those would propably be the only silent and peaceful moments of his school year then he woud have cherished them a lot more. Or locked the door to the comparment

But he didnt, and the twin red heads stormed in without a warning, slamming the door behind them.

Alarmed he watched the copies of the same person take a peek outside, they were obviously running from something. They exchanged a look, wide smiles adorning their features.

"Reckon they lost us, George?" asked one the other

"Probably" answered George as they moved to take the seat across Hades who kept following their movements, buffled.

The person who was not George finally acknowladge the dark haired boy "You don't mind, do you mate?"

Buffled, anxious and angry where three very strong emotions to feel at once and Hades feared he would overload. Which he probably had since he just furrowed his eyebrows at George and not-George, who copied his actions.

"I think he is broken" whispered George to Not-George

Oh, honey, you have no idea, he wanted to say but of course he would never say such a thing outloud since he avoided saying things altogether.

"Hi" Not George said a bit too loudly with an overexaggerated wave but Hades gave no reaction. Undaunted, he continued "I'm Fred" he pointed to himself "And this is George" he pointed at his doppelganger who gave a slight wave. "What's your name?"

In spite of himself Hades managed to say his name back, well, more like whisper it weakly. Too weakly for the twins to catch.

"What was that?"

"Hades" he said a bit more loudly, his nails diggings at the skin of his seat.

This time Fred smiled "Hades? Thats a cool name, right, George?"

His twin nodded.

Overwhelmed, Hades said a small thank you before gathering his hands on his lap, focusing all his attention to them.

The twins decided to let him be, or so he thought.

"What should we do for the dinner tonight?" laughed one twin

"Maybe smoke bombs?"

"Yeah, that sounds like a good idea, what do you say Hades?"

He was naive, far too naive to think that they would just give him a few peaceful moments.

"Wh... What?" he stuttered looking up from his hands at the twins smiling, eager faces.

"You say smoke bombs as well?"

"For what?"

"The prank, of course!" they said in unison, kinda scaring Hades.

"Why would you want to prank someone?"

The twins exchanged looks before looking back at him incrediously "For fun, obviously."

That unison thing is something that Hades found really weird.

"Don't you-" started one twin

"-like pranks?" finished the other

Hades had to ask, How the fuck did they do that?

"I've never pranked anyone before, why do you do it?"

"Because we can"

"And because its fun"

"Now, smoke bombs, or not?"

And in spite of himself, he answered and that was the start of a great friendship that lasted a total of two hours, forty three minutes and eigth seconds.

The twins and Hades exited the now stoped train running while the candy lady screamed at them, yet they didn't care, for they were laughing and Hades couldn't remember a time where his stomach hurt so much from laughter, he had never laughed that much in his entire life.

The company of three came into a stop behind some students as a huge man was leading them. Exhausted, Hades realized something else, he had never run that much in his entire life either.

"Blimey mate, you seriously need some exercise" Fred said patting him in the back as Hades leaned forward, with his hands on his knees trying to catch his breath. The dark haired boy found the strength to raise his hand and flip him off.

"How are you fine after that?"

"Well, we obviously work out. I mean, look out those muscles" the twins flexed their arms trying to show their very non existant muscles to Hades causing him to laugh only to clutch his chest in pain

"Stop being funny"

"Impossible-"

"-its in our nature"

"Alright everyone, move along"  called the huge man

Hades, who was now seeing white spots, whispered "Santa?"

"Okay, grab him" Fred instructed George. So, they grabbed him by his sides leading him to one of the boats.

"Put me down, gently"

They threw him in.

"I said gently!"

He got up mastering all the balance he could since under his feet there was a very unstable boat, and sat down on one of the seats as the twins followed suit, along with another boy.

"Oh, don't be angry, Hadie."

"Maybe he isn't angry, Fred, maybe he is afraid of the water."

"Ohhh" cooed Fred, taking the seat next to him" Don't worry, I'll hold you hand all the way to the safe, and stable earth."

And so he did, he took Hades hand to his own even if Hades threatened to throw him in the lake to drown. But Fred continued holding his hand without a care as he opened a conversation with his twin and the other boy who had very politely introduced himself as Lee Jordan.

"Hi" Hades greeted still trying to get his arm free from Fred's iron hold with no luck,

"Fred, let go this instant"

"Mmm, no"

And so, tired and angry as he was, Hades gave up and instead turned his attention to the water of the lake. It was pretty late so the water was very dark almost pitch black, and the only thing that broke the stillness of the waters where the boats that were occupied by students. And a tail.

Hades could have been mistaken but he knew he wasn't, he saw it.

"Fred" he squeezed his hand softly

"For the hundreth time, Hades, I'm not letting go"

"No, idiot, look" he motioned with his head towards where he had last seen the tail.

"Yeah, uh, looking...." he trailed off

"Just wait a second, will you?"

With an impatient huff Fred rested his chin on Hades shoulder as they both looked around the spot. And just when Fred started questioning his new friends sanity, he saw it too.

"Bloody hell..."

He turned to lock eyes with Hades who was giving him a 'told ya so' look

"And you thought I was crazy"

"Never said that" the red head smile, mischieviously  

"Yeah but you thought about it"

"My bad"

"Hey, what are you two love birds talking about?" called Lee who was talking with George while Fred and Hades were on their little mermaid observation time.

"Nothing" they said, for some reason not really wanting to mention what happened not wanting to hide it. It's just wasn't necessary for everyone to know...

"See Hades? Told ya, you would be safe" said Fred as they got off the boat

"Yeah, yeah, can you let go now?"

Fred faked a pout letting go of his hand "You don't love me"

"Damn right I don't"

He made an overexaggerated gasp, placing his hand on his chest "That was just rude, young man"

Hades couldn't help but giggle, shaking his head at his friends antics "Come on, idiot"

"Can I hold your hand again?"

"No"

Being shoved away in a small chamber by a stern looking professor is defintely not what Hades had in mind when he heard of Hogwarts famous reputation. The first years were too many for the small chamber to the point where Hades was sandwiched between the twins. Trying to create some distance between them Hades took two steps behind only to step on somebody's toes

"Sorry" he hurriedly said, moving forward. This time stumbling into somebody else. Looking up he found Fred "Sorry"

"Don't worry about it" assured the taller boy putting his hands on his shoulders softly, to keep him in place and still create some distance between their bodies. The stern looking teacher, wh had been explaining Hogwarts' sorting ceremony finally mentioned the one thing that the new pupils where actually interested in;

"You will be sorted into your houses. The houses are, Gryffindor,"

The twins looked at each other in glee and excitement

"Ravenclaw, Hufflepuff, and Slytherin"

Hades raised his chin, something the twins missed as they were too busy looking forward to be sorted in their house.

Finally, they moved in the great hall and Hades had to admit that maybe, Hogwarts reputation was well earned. It was a majestic sight with hunderds of thousands of candles guiding their way with the soft and warm flicker of their fire. But the candles that were floating in the air was not what caught Hades' attention, nor was it the size of the room filled with four large tables at where students were seatting looking forward to the sorting in anticipation.

No, what caught his attention was the ceiling, which didn't resemble any ceiling he had ever seen for this one reflected the night sky, filled with stars and the moon, not one cloud in sight.

He could get used to this, he thought.

"Man, I'm excited" he heard Lee Jordan say towards them, capturing the dark haired boys attention.

"Same"

"But we already know what house we will be sorted into" Fred said cockily

Hades arched an eyebrow and crossed his arms, a smile playing on his lips "Care to reveal, you highness?"

"It's classified information-" started George, putting a hand around Hades shoulders

"But since we like you-" Fred put his own arm around Hades shoulders

"We'll tell you"

Lee and Hades exchanged glances, seemingly tired of the twins' antics.

"There is no question about it," they continued " Gryffindor"

The youngest Lestrange scoffed "How so?"

"Well, its the best house, of course. Courageous, and they have a badass lion as a symbol."

"Not like those cowards in Slytherin" continued Fred, glaring at the Slytherin table, too occupied to notice Hades unfold his arms "They are horrible, mom says, full of snakes that one. Back stabbing selfish cowards who care about no one other than themselves"

Another thing he should have noticed, but was too busy to do so, was Hades slowly narrowing his eyes at them

"Wouldnt want to associate myself with these ones"

"They wouldn't want you, George, they have very high standards. You have to be as disgusting as them" the twins and Lee started laughing but Hades wasn't in the mood to laugh anymore, or be around them. Instead, he took notice of the arms the twins still had draped over his shoulders and with a swift movement he knocked them away.

Their laughter stopped "Oi, mate, what's-" Fred started but he was cut off when he found himself under Hades cold gaze

"Hades Lestrange"

Without breaking his stare Hades scoffed "Honestly" before making his way towards the stool where the professor was waiting with the Sorting Hat.

Confidently he took his place on the stool and the hat was placed on his head for no more than six seconds when it screamed "SLYTHERIN"

The Slytherin table started clapping and with the same hautly confidence that was almost natural in his family and house he started walking towards his rightful place but not before he looked at his previous companions who seemed shocked and betrayed. He smirked, flipping them off and didn't pay them any mind for the rest of the night.

A friendship that was made in a matter of minutes was crushed in a matter of minutes as well. For that was it's worth. Worthless, to be more precise.

[zukkacore]

top five nostalgic movies 💕

This is such an interesting question..... like this is a slightly different question from my fav movies but there is a lot of overlap, ascending order.

5. A Bug’s Life: one of my fav movies as a child. It’s aged kinda weirdly bc of the animation but imo it doesn’t look too bad, + it’s so underrated. It’s really really funny! It’s cute! Like. It’s not one of those heartstring Pixar movies that make you cry but I promise you, you will laugh!

4. The Princess Bride: this movie is so fricking funny and amazing, honestly the brilliance of it is that as an adult the absurdity of it is hilarious but as a kid everything makes complete sense! Somehow it works both as a sincere fairy tale and a satire! That’s kinda why I put it here bc i loved it as a kid and as an adult I still love it, but now for a bunch of different reasons! This is probably one of my favorite movies too

3. Mulan: this is also a movie I associate w my cousins bc we’re an Asian family so this is the one Disney Princess we thought was cool. Plus she’s like an action hero so I think my aunt liked that. It’s a good one, probably wouldn’t be in my top of all time but I definitely have a lot of good memories surrounding it.

2. Lilo and Stich: I was obsessed w Stitch as a little kid, but as an adult the more I think abt this movie the more I’m bewildered by its existence. Like yes, it’s Disney, it has a cute marketable creature and it has broad appeal but it’s such a unique product that I think Stitch is just this magical thing that Disney has no idea what it had on it’s hands! In some ways I can’t believe it’s a movie that exists and is made by a major studio! Like..... I tend to associate nostalgia w movies I’d bond w my family with, and my cousins are kama’aina so this movie is very close to their heart, plus my aunt is very feminist-y and has a career in law & social justice etc etc so you know if it gets past their bs meter it’s actually kinda interesting and special? It’s like... weirdly transgressive. It’s the Disney movie that’s almost cool to like, even ppl who are disillusioned by how Disney capitalizes off colonized cultures for profit still kinda give it a pass which is so funny? Anyway there are cute aliens and also the relationship between Lilo and Nani is genuinely beautiful and also David is Disney prince goals!!! He’s a catch!!!!! I have a lot to say abt this movie. It’s probably one of my favorite of all time

1. Sky High: ppl are sleeping on this movie!!!! It rules!!!!! It’s honestly just a rly entertaining and creative family film it’s just a good ol’ time. It makes me feel kinda like what Roger Ebert said abt the mummy, I’m paraphrasing but basically “there’s nothing going for it except that I enjoyed every minute of it”. Like... I could definitely argue why there’s actual talent and creativity put into the production design, acting, writing, and action set pieces so I wouldn’t go that far but it’s just a good fricking time!!!! It’s a shame it never got to be the franchise Disney planned for it bc it’s so fricking good! I just love it! I love everything abt it! The costumes, the jokes, the goofy kids, the teachers, the appearances from prominent genre/comic book property actors, the action set pieces I just!! If you asked me what my favorite movie was this probably wouldn’t be first movie to come to mind but the more I think abt it the more I realize it has to be on the list right?? I’ve watched it too many times for it not to me. Watching it just makes me happy!

Honorable Mentions: The Outsiders, The Goonies, Stand By Me, A Knights Tale, When Harry Met Sally, The Parent Trap, Howl’s Moving Castle, My Neighbor Totoro

Ask me “Top 5” anything!

[blitz-and-hearth]

I was looking through my wip folders and apparently, I wrote a bit of highschool au Blitzstone? I don’t remember writing it and probably won’t finish it, but what I’ve got is pretty good so I thought you guys might enjoy it 

It was a cool but sunny fall day, a nice day, a just lovely day to be spending... In detention. Hearth wasn't too upset over it, he normally spent his weekends sitting bored in the empty classroom. This time it was for being caught smoking in the bathroom when he should have been in math class. Really he should have been kicked out of Valhalla High by now, if he was any other highschooler he would have been. But because his father was the oh so great rich and powerful Alderman he was still here. Their family founded the town and he gave lots of money to the school and blah blah blah. Honestly, he was tired of being told the ways he should act differently because of that. It was useless he knew, nothing he could do would change his father's mind about him. He'd been a deep shame on their family the moment his parents found out he was deaf.

 Hearth had still tried to be a good kid for a while in hopes of winning his parent's praise, but when his younger brother was killed by a hit and run driver when they were playing together, he realized he'd never make them like him. He was only a freak and now in their eyes a murder of what had been their "good" son, it was pointless.

So Hearth had swung around the other way, going out of his way to be a troublemaker and bring even more shame to his family. Now at 17 he dressed in dark clothes, fingerless gloves, spiked chokers, knee-high boots, and nails painted jet black. He'd died his blonde hair to pure white and priced his ears, even gotten a few tattoos. He stole beer and cigarettes, banned from every Walmart and corner store around. Doing anything he could think of to look like a punk and piss his father off. Teachers and students alike either hate or envy him, muttering rumors and gossip whenever he passed. They always seemed to forget that just because he's deaf doesn't mean he doesn't know when they're talking about him. Fucking assholes. At least he was alone expect for the teacher this Saturday, who was busy grading homework at her desk. He could just lean back in the chair and doodle for the next two hours. Or at least that's what he thought until he looked up and realized another teacher had come in with a boy he recognized.

Hearth stayed out the social circles, but it was impossible to go to this school and not know Blitzen Gyllen, or Blitz as he went by often. He was the opposite of Hearth, bright and peppy, popular with almost everyone and well liked. He knew more about his mother, she used to run a vast jewelry company and had been very rich and successful.... Had been. Then the scandal came out how she stole all her designs from a poor man who worked under her, who she was also sleeping with. It cost her her business and a good bit of her money. And despite no actual confirmation, it was well known Blitzen was the resulting love child of all that chaos... She worked for Hearth's dad now. Hearth had never actually spoken to Blitzen before though, only having seen him from a distance at his father's parties or around the school. But he knew exactly what the normally well-behaved student was doing here in detention, the whole school had been chattering about it. Hearth didn't know the details, but apparently, Blitzen had been given a dare to prank the principal. So he'd filled the guy's office and car with rubber duckies, floor to ceiling, impossible to enter with how many there were.

No one knew how he'd done it or gotten so many fucking rubber ducks but people had started referring to Blitz as "the duck master." Hearth would admit it was funny just because of how incredibly angry the principal had gotten and yet despite knowing about it he didn't put two and two together that they'd most likely end up sharing a detention at least once with how many Blitzen had gotten for that. Hearth eyed the other boy suspiciously, getting a good look at him up close for the first time. He could see why people liked him, he was handsome, strong jaw with a soft form giving him a friendly look, very beautiful Hearth would admit. He was dressed nice, supposedly made his own clothes. White undershirt with a plump colored felt vest and dress pants in the same purple shade, and light brown pointed shoes. His hair was done in dreads and tied up in a ponytail, and despite being a year younger than him, already had the stubbly start of a beard growing in. 

Hearth hadn't realized he was staring till Blitzen turned around and started walking towards him, snapping out of it and quickly looking back down at his sketchbook. He side-eyed him as Blitzen sat at the table next to him. So weird, they were to only students in here and yet he'd sat right next to Hearth, what was this guys game? He ignored him at first, going back to drawing, but after a minute he felt a tap on his shoulder and turned to look at him. 

"You're H-E-A-R-T-H, right?"

Blitzen signed, bit clumsily with a focused expression, clearly not used to using sign language. Still the fact he knew even that very much surprised Hearth, staring at him with wide eyes before narrowing them again. He was the only deaf-mute in town, and he'd never met Blitzen in person, why would he know sign language unless he wanted something from him. Hearth didn't answer, just nodding as he continued to glare at him. 

"It's great to meet you in person, I've seen you before at my mom's business parties. I'm Blitzen Gyllen, as you probably already know" 

He said with a grin as he offered a hand to Hearth, who did not take it right away. He didn't know what Blitzen wanted, his mother was poor but not that poor... After a second to consider he took the other boy's hand and gave a small shake. After all, he knew what was up, all these years he'd had many people try to get his family's money through him, and none had ever tricked him, this guy wasn't any different. But he might as well indulge and play along for awhile. Maybe he'll even get some free drinks or a quick fuck out of it.

"I heard about the duck thing, it was pretty funny"

The pale boy signed, and Blitzen took a minute to interpret what he'd said but then grinned when he figured it out 

"Thanks! It was my little cousin's boy... erm girl...? well date friend idea, she's much better at pranks then me. But it was really fun to do, I might do more of them if I could get away with it, being in detention often seems pretty boring."

He chattered, Hearth shrugging in response 

"Not too bad, especially this teacher, she doesn't give a fuck"

He signed as he glanced over at said teacher, who was currently reading a shitty looking adult romance novel with a shirtless dude and swooning lady on the cover. 

"Plus she's hooking up with the gym teacher and leaves after ten minutes to go see him"

He added as he looked back at the other boy. Blitzen was frowning with concern

  "That seems really irresponsible for a teacher..."

He whispered back. Hearth snorted at that thought 

"Who cares? Just means we can leave as soon as she's gone"

Hearth responded, huffing as he rolled his eyes. No surprise there, what a goodie two shoes. The duck prank was clearly a one-time thing 

"You can stay here for the two hours if you like but I'm leaving as soon as she's gone, with you or not, teacher's pet"

Blitzen blinked at that and flushed red, apparently not appreciating the insult 

"I'm not a teacher's pet just because I do well in school! Fine, I'll come with you, I'll show you what kinda "bad boy punk," or whatever you guys are calling it, I can be"

He said with a determined look, mumbling angrily to himself some things Hearth couldn't catch, arms crossed and pouting. Hearth rolled his eyes again. This guy was trying so hard to be his friend. But then he grinned as a thought struck him. This dude was obviously trying to get at his families money but was a clean-nosed kid who stayed out of trouble, Hearth could have some fun seeing how far he could push him. Maybe today would be fun after all...

Right on time five minutes later the teacher glanced at the clock and stood, putting her book in her bag.

"I have to take care of something, you two behave while I'm gone."

She told them and then was gone. As soon as the door closed, Hearth hopped up, stuffing his sketchbook into his backpack and walking over to the window. Blitzen followed him curiously, watching with a frown as Hearth pushed one open 

"What are we doing, why can't we just walk out the door?"

He asked in confusion 

"Its more fun being sneaky"

Hearth signed back with a shrug before climbing into the window frame

"Think you can keep up fancy pants?"

He added before jumping out onto the grass below. Blitzen's face burned red again, rising to the challenge and immediately hopping out of the window to land next to him, straightening up and brushing himself off, giving Hearth a look that said "bring it on"

"So, what are we going to do?"

[chemicalmagecraft]

I Would Totally Kick Jiraiya’s Butt Chapter 17

Neji said something. I don't know what, I wasn't really paying attention. Yeah, yeah. I know, I should pay attention to whatever it was my cousin-slash-brother said, but I was preoccupied. In five days, Hanabi would be born, and probably also Neji's sibling that I had yet to know the name of because they weren't in canon on account of a uncle Hizashi's death. It was something that I should've been excited about, but... How do you tell your adopted cousin that his aunt, and possibly also his mother, has a really high chance of dying in a week or so? How do you tell your adopted father his wife will die? Your uncle? It was a lot easier telling Dad his brother would have died if I hadn't intervened because, well, he hadn't and I'd been all hopped up on righteous indignation at the time.

But there really wasn't anyone to blame this time. I mean, Hanabi and (insert whatever aunt Hikaru and uncle Hizashi were about to name their kid here) didn't ask to be born, and nobody really knew that Mom wasn't really able to withstand the stress of labor a second time until I decided to check what, exactly, killed her. But yeah. Turns out that Mom had some kind of issue with her heart that was just minor enough that nobody ever noticed anything wrong, but still serious enough that at her age, a second child was kinda dangerous. And it was genetic. And aunt Hikaru was an exact genetic duplicate of Mom, as most identical twins are. You can see why I might be a little worried here, right?

So yeah. I mean, I probably should've told someone about said heart defects instead of simply passive-aggressively hinting about it, but I was kinda... scared to talk about it? Soooo instead I silently checked through all the possible forms of making sure someone doesn't die that I had available to me. Sage-enriched red chakra is pretty freaking good for the heart, especially when you throw in a temporary copy of the Uzumaki bloodline's vitality. So now that it was a week or so away from Hanabi's birth, Chikage was off grinding her power enough that she'd be able to cover both at once. She could split herself in two, but at the cost of both copies having half the strength of the original. So both Chikages were training at once to raise their capacity and power in our secret base. Well, two Chikages with most of the power were training, and then a much lesser Chikage clone who was rocking out in preparation for YET ANOTHER upcoming deadline, this time the Uchiha incident. Well, just before the Uchiha incident. We all agreed that one of our favorite songs would be very apropos in the event that we had to confront Danzō, and she was trying to figure it out because I never actually played it before. I liked it a lot, though, so I knew it by heart.

Okay, maybe there were better uses of our time, but with the power level of that specific clone, making and then playing the guitar was a surprisingly good form of training.

Neji hit me lightly to get my attention, bringing me back to the present. "Were you paying attention?"

"Muh..." I muttered. "Not really."

He sighed. "I asked if you wanted to spar? You looked worried about something, so I figured I'd take your mind off of it."

I shrugged. "Sure, why not?"

kukukuku~

I nervously bounced my leg. Today was the day. My sister and cousin were going to be born within the hour and I wasn't entirely sure Mom and aunt Hikaru would be alright. Yes I could see the future, but my own actions, and consequently Chikage's, were what changed the outcomes I saw, meaning that until Chikage pulled it off and it wasn't the future anymore but actually set in stone, I could see both the future where they survived and the future where they didn't, meaning either outcome could happen.

After a while of tense waiting with my family in the hospital, I felt a burst of information. One of the two Chikages just depleted herself, and like a shadow clone that meant her memories returned to me. A few moments later, the other other me died as well. With its fate no longer in my hands, the future I wanted to see wouldn't branch out, and... success! I closed my eyes and breathed out a sigh of relief. Two healthy baby girls, born to two nearly-identical sets of parents. I practically melted in my chair, the tension I'd been feeling for weeks suddenly draining away. "Fate averted," I sighed, then yawned. When was the last time I slept? "Hey Neji..." I murmured, my eyes heavy. "Wake me up when..." I closed my eyes and let sleep take me.

kukukuku~

Someone was shaking me. "Kouki!" Neji shouted.

"Mmmh." I rubbed my eyes. "Why are you yelling?" I muttered.

"I've been trying to wake you up for ten minutes!"

I licked my lips. "What do you need me for?"

"Did you forget about how our sisters were just born!?"

I nodded blearily. Then I remembered three separate sets of memories of agonizing over the impending doom of loved ones. "Oh."

"Yeah. Uncle Hiashi told me to wake you up." It looked like he didn't notice the trauma. To be fair, I was pretty drowsy. He offered me his hand and pulled me up. I swayed on my feet a bit. "Are you okay?"

"I... haven't slept in... I dunno, probably a week?"

Neji sighed. "You're sleeping when we get back home."

"'Kay..." Neji dragged me by the hand to the right room. It looked like Mom and aunt Hikaru were in the same room. How coincidental. Neji led me to my mom. Or at least, I think she was my mom. Normally I was a bit better about that, but I was so tired that I was having issues sensing the difference between my mom's and aunt's chakra signatures. Really, having an aunt and uncle who are both almost identical to my parents is really annoying sometimes.

"Kouki," she said, smiling. I grinned back at her and looked at the bundle of cloth in her arms. "Do you want to hold your sister?" She handed her to me. I looked at the baby in the bundle as a sense of calm washed over me. To be honest she didn't look like much, as is the case with all newborns, but she was my sister! "Her name is Hanabi." She gurgled at me, and I gave her a small grin as I placed her back in Mom's arms.

"Do you want to see your cousin?" aunt Hikaru asked me. I calmly walked over to her and accepted the proffered child. She looked exactly like Hanabi, though to be fair that wasn't saying much at the moment. "Her name is Hanako." I snorted. That was probably planned. Hanako grabbed my finger, and something hit me. Hanako was an original character. Her parents were dead in canon, and the only reason they weren't in our... timeline(?) was that I showed up one day and sliced a guy's leg off. And just now, my aunt's life was almost traded for hers, had I not... taken it upon myself to stop her death while shying away from the simple option of telling my family about the impending doom. I really need to work on my social skills...

My eyes blurred, and I sniffed. I'd almost lost my mom. Again. I'd almost lost my aunt. Why couldn't I say anything? I quickly handed Hanako back to aunt Hikaru as the tears started streaming down my face. "Kouki?" she asked. I sobbed and bit my lip.

"Kouki, are you okay?" my dad asked me. I shook my head. "Do you want to talk about it?" I shook my head.

After a few moments of sitting down and breathing deeply, I managed to calm down enough to talk. "I'm fine now..." I muttered. "Need to sleep though. Got a headache."

"Fine, but we will talk about this later." I nodded.

kukukuku~

I'm sure you guys would prefer not to hear about how I told my dad talked to me about that whole debacle. Suffice to say, though, there was some crying and on my part and a few stern and then reassuring words on his.

On a completely unrelated note, Hanabi and Hanako were born like a few days before the first day of our second year of school. Yaaaaaaaay.

"I don't wanna go to school!" Naruto griped. He and Tenten met up with Hinata, Neji, and I while we were walking to school.

"Too bad!" Tenten, who was carrying him like a sack of potatoes, shouted.

"I'm sure it won't be too bad, Naruto-kun," Hinata offered. "If you want, you can... sit next to me?" Naruto was still squirming around in Tenten's grasp and it didn't look like he noticed her.

I heard a laugh. "Is Naruto being difficult?" Ino asked. She and Sakura walked up to us. "Isn't he heavy, Tenten?"

Tenten blushed. "I'm-" she shouted, then sighed. "I can hold him."

Ino shrugged. "Suit yourself. I'm pretty someone else here can carry him if you need a break, though. Not me, but..."

"I-Ino..." Sakura muttered.

"I was thinking more like Neji or Kouki, Sakura-chan," Ino assured her.

"I can carry him!" Tenten shouted.

We chatted all the way to school.

kukukuku~

Chikage

I decided to shadow Hinata's class for the first few days, I guess mostly out of boredom and curiosity than anything else. Naruto was a lot of fun to watch simply from being an idiot, plus this timeline Iruka got to yell at Naruto because his mom was a teacher. It didn't help, but it was funny.

The only really interesting event was, once again, the sparring matches. To be honest, I was a little excited to see how this would go. In canon, Sasuke wrecked Naruto. But now, Naruto was the son of not only a ninja schoolteacher but also a special jōnin, both of whom taught him some of what they knew. And then I made him train a bit. So odds were Naruto would at least give Sasuke a run for his money. "Start!" Iruka commanded. Naruto charged at Sasuke almost immediately, but instead of getting immediately knocked over he caught Sasuke with a feint. Then he punched him in the face. Naruto did eventually lose, but Sasuke looked genuinely worried about Naruto's ability to fight at points. After the match, Sasuke begrudgingly acknowledged the fact that Naruto was a bit of a tough opponent instead of just being a little jerk.

Next up on the list of noteworthy fights, Hinata versus some kid. Some kid got beat up rather easily, which made me proud. Next, Sakura versus Kiba. I shifted my position a bit to get a better view, a smirk on my nonexistent face.

Kiba grinned and cracked his knuckles. "Sorry, Sakura, but it looks like you're doomed." Sakura whimpered, but clenched her fists. Kiba shrugged. "It's not your fault, of course. It's not like a girl like you could beat up me. Tell you what, I'll give you the first shot." He just stood there with a stupid grin on his face.

Sakura hesitated for a moment and took a deep breath. Then, with a determined look on her face, she cocked back her fist, shouted "Shannarō!" and punched him in the gut with about one fourth of her full strength. Kiba was sent flying.

"I... guess... Sakura wins?" Iruka said after a few moments of stunned silence. Sakura blushed as she bashfully returned to where she was sitting and Iruka made sure Kiba was alright. Everyone crowded Sakura, asking her how she did that and calling her awesome. It looked like she was starting to enjoy the attention, at least from the smile she had. I hoped it wouldn't go to her head, though...

kukukuku~

I reclined on the sofa in my secret base's living room and opened up my compact. I could't see how our timeline would go down as far as the Uchiha Massacre yet, but from what I could see that still hadn't stopped being a thing. Foundation plants riling up the Uchiha police force, spreading gossip among the civilian population, and even outright killing people on both sides and framing the others for it pretty much assured that. Even though Chikage was able to pick them off from and into the shadows when nobody was looking with her new Claimed by the Shadows Jutsu (which allowed her to seal objects and even people in her shadow body), they just seemed to keep coming! And of course, while we were able to at least legally detain the insurgents, we couldn't interrogate them, even after I broke their seals. The brainwashing was strong with those guys, and even Yamanaka Inoichi couldn't break their psychic defenses. I guess they were the most prepared for that, having access to Yamanaka of their own...

The portal to the living room opened, and a moment later the Hokage stepped in. "Hokage," I said, then stylishly shut my compact. "Should I offer you something to drink?"

He grunted. "Kouki. What do you have?" I rolled off the couch and flew over to the minifridge.

"Right, let's see..." I opened the fridge and rifled through its contents. "I've got water, milk, chocolate milk, soda, juice, aaaand that's about it on the drinks. I could boil you some water but I don't have tea leaves or anything. Just hot chocolate."

"Is that all you have?"

"Okay in my defense, I don't like tea. And if you mean all I have period, because I recognize that judgy tone of voice, the big fridge over there contains actual food." I pointed to it. "And yes, at the request of my parents that includes veggies. So what do you want?"

"I'll take a water, then." I grabbed a bottle of water for him and a bottle of chocolate milk for me, then went back to my couch. Sarutobi had taken a chair on the opposite side of the table from my couch. I tossed him the water, sat down, and took a sip of my milk.

"So..."

"It's not your fault, you know."

I shrugged. "It'd have happened without me, and I did manage to take out some Foundation stooges. Speaking of which..." I tossed three sleeved cards at him. The good thing about shuriken training was that I could also throw cards at people. "Today's catch."

He examined the three cards, though he made sure not to take them out of the opaque sleeves. "They're getting more active." The cards, by the way, had special seals in them that let me dump things Chikage caught, then remove the Chikage part of the shadows without destabilizing the jutsu. The sleeves kept them in shadow, which was needed to have the jutsu stay once Chikage left.

"I suspect at least some of them are trying to investigate the disappearances." I chuckled. "Danzō's whole 'no individuality' thing is actually biting him in that regard. Most of the Foundation that I've spirited away are nobodies, right?" He nodded. "So he can't use them against us without revealing his entire organization and incriminating himself. And the others have already gone 'missing,' thanks to him. That's the problem with having an organization in the shadows. You're likely to get eaten by a grue."

"Right, well... Are you okay?"

"What do you mean?"

"You've been trying to stop this for over a year now, and from the way things are going it looks like the massacre will still happen."

I shrugged. "This might sound bad, but... well, I've gotten over it? It's looking more and more like we can't prevent the Uchiha massacre no matter what. I mean, I haven't quite given up yet, but if we can't save Shisui then I'll hopefully be fine with just making the massacre not as bad as it could be."

"I see. I suppose your maturity is natural considering your ability to see the future."

I licked my lips. "And the fact that I have, like, seventy-two hour days."

"That too."

I got up and clapped my hands. "Right, unless you have anything else you need me for, I have to go work on homework."

"Congratulations again on getting a younger sister."

"Thanks."

[kathillards]

rangerstop day two

HOLY FUCKING SHIT THE MEGAFORCE RANGERS SHOUTED US OUT AT THEIR PANEL AZIM TOLD EVERYONE ABOUT A GROUP OF FRIENDS FROM ALL OVER THE COUNTRY WHO MET BECAUSE OF POWER RANGERS AND POINTED AT US AND THE MEGAFORCE RANGERS ALL CHEERED AND TOLD US TO STAND UP OH MY GOD

uhhh sorry how do i move on from that how do i even think about anything else. the panel room was CROWDED people were FILMING kat and tabby had gone up to ask questions (which were HUGE hits) and come back and sat down AND THEN AZIM SAID THAT in the middle of a question about. i dont even fucking remember. something about what great community values power rangers has or something? and i guess we were related to power rangers being a community or whatever but bitch. BITCH. he said it and like pointed at us and they all started clapping (this sounds fake as hell i know BUT THERES VIDEO PROOF SOMEWHERE???) and everyone turned to look at us and we were like hi and then like two minutes later azim went “oh wait i have to make a correction, its not a group of girls its three girls and one guy because i think abigail isnt here? right?” and we were like ya so uh moral of the story... azim rizk i would murder ten hundred men for you

ok other things happened too, this will probably not be in chronological order bc i cant think right now 

- mike ginn stopped when he saw me and looked for tabby who was hiding behind me when she saw him and he looked around for tabby and did his pointing thing again and it was so cuuute

- kat was talking to christina about how we avoided the cast all day yesterday and she was like “yes but i saw you anyway ;) and i was wondering when you’d come over to say hi!” shes so CUTE and then they talked about her rescue puppy and she was so happy to talk about her puppy

- ciara and christina made ben sign the art presents he gave them, ciara did it first and christina was like OMG WHY DIDNT YOU AUTOGRAPH MINE and made him sign hers too

- christina and i did a WHOLE photoshoot we did a normal pic then a silly pic but then she didnt like so we did a kissy face pic and she was like “oh i think i did a duck face” and im like thats ok so did i AND OUR PICS ARE SO CUTE AND SHE HUGGED ME SO TIGHT I. WOULD. DIE. FOR. YOU. CHRISTINA. MASTERSON.

- selwyn called tabby his girlfriend when i showed up without her he was like “wheres my girlfriend” bc he remembered us from last night and then she came over and he was like THERE YOU ARE and gave her a free selfie (and signed her space dvd with “tj is the real leader of in space” but refused to X out andros’ face bc that was mean) and he covered up najee’s face on her kevin t-shirt and then was upset bc it looked like he was touching her chest and tracy lynn laughed at him over it AND THEN HE TOLD US TO COME TO THE TGIF IN THE HOTEL AFTERWARDS BC THE RANGERS WERE GONNA GO THERE AND GET DRUNK AND HE INVITED US TO HAVE DRINKS W/ HIM but we stood him up because... we are tired... he was like “yeah we have this stupid vip dinner but like we’re gonna try to leave early and just go get fucking smashed” and we were like ur so valid selwyn. i love you.

- kat showed azim my tweets defending megaforce and he had to put the phone down to run his hands through his hair and be like “wow that was such a specific takedown” and kat was like “yeah she just says this shit all the time bc shes seen megaforce five hundred times” and he was like “she was so detailed though she didnt just say ‘you suck’ she put THOUGHT into her takedowns” 

- (later when he signed my super megaforce green print he called me “my sista in social media smackdown!!!” complete with that many exclamation points)

- brennan said “i like your hat” to ben five times and he also signed tabby’s as well with his three catchphrases (she asked for him to write “awesome!” and he was like “i had more lines than that....”) he also told us he and the dino charge team were invited back for a dc/nsteel teamup but they kept cancelling them bc of budget reasons till it was just him and yoshi and he was finally like “i told them to just bring yoshi back because like thats his brother” and i was like “but then they didnt even INTERACT” and he was like “i KNOW”

- tabby’s tracy story: she asked tracy if it was uncomfortable fighting in crop tops and short skirts and tracy said “it wasnt uncomfortable but it was hard to not show everything” and she was like “idk why a power ranger would dress like that” and tabby told her ashley should have her own fashion line of athletic wear for fighter girls and tracy was like YES and tabby said she should have been leader of turbo bc she was into cars and tracy said that when they told her that ashley was gonna have a car plot she was like “ew no i dont want to touch greasy car oils” but that she was happy that ashley got to challenge herself

- kat was standing around azim the entire morning and he was introducing her to everyone who came up to him like she was his handler and at one point accidentally implied that she was his girlfriend and kat was like no im not and he was like “oh whoops it did kinda sound like that...” and his actual handler was like “why did u correct him” and kat was like “NO I LOVE HIS GIRLFRIEND” 

- when i was taking my pics w/ the megaforce cast and andrew was the sweetest angel and he kept making poses over my shoulder while i giggled and then he asked me for a hug and KISSED MY CHEEK and hugged me so tight and was like “love you guys” I WOULD DIE FOR YOU ANDREW GRAY

- john mark is literally the funniest person alive and he was constantly going around the megaforce booth when we were there like (to ben when he was giving art to ciara and christina) “WHERES MINE” and to me when i was having them sign my megaforce prints “WHERES MINE” hes so funny and i love himmm

- ciara was signing my prints but she got distracted when we asked about her dogs and she stopped and opened her phone and started showing us pics and videos and she was soo happy to talk about her dogs too and then we took our pic and checked it to make sure it looked good and tabby was like “you look gorgeous” and she was like “we BOTH look gorgeous” i cannot believe. AND THEN she threw in a group photo for FREE and we all got in there

- kat was telling us and azim about some douchebag vendor who was like hitting on her and inviting her to an afterparty and was like “are you over 21″ when she was just trying to look at his spd toys and azim was literally “which guy. where. where is he.” HE WAS GONNA KILL THAT GUY FOR KAT HE LOVES HER

- we somehow got on the subject of azim SHAVING HIS BEAUTIFUL BEARD and he was like “oh well we went to the make a wish foundation to meet kids and the beard scares them so i had to shave” and i was like “thats racist” and he was like nooo but u could tell his mind was blown and i was like “cameron didnt shave” and he was like “well cameron is white” and i was like SO YOU ADMIT ITS RACIST and he laughed also im correct

- related but michael copon came over to jessica rey’s table while we were there and she was like “hi michael these are my FRIENDS” and they were talking about how they’re cousins and they’re both half filipino and tabby was like “why didnt they give you any scenes together in the teamup!” and jessica was like “because i was with erin!” and michael was like “because they couldnt have two filipinos together in one scene” power rangers got WOKE man

- kat to andrew: i have a huge troy plushie!

andrew: oh my dogs would rip that up immediately

kat:

andrew: do your dogs not rip things up

kat: i dont... i wouldnt let them...touch my troy plushies...

(we love you andrew. he doesnt even know hes at a con. hes just here to chill.)

- someone at the panel asked a stupid question about “if you could cameo in any other season which season would you pick” like they dont get asked this all the fucking time and the rangers were like hmm like beast morphers or dino charge and then andrew, my husband my light my life, was like “fuck power rangers, i wanna go to the dc universe” (he didnt cuss obviously) but like... king. legend supporting legends. AND THEN CHRISTINA WAS LIKE “oh mood i wanna be in the pokemon universe” and john mark was like “as what” and she was like “i dont know i didnt watch it” QUEEN OF POKEMON she kins jigglypuff

- tabby was at ann marie crouch’s booth and telling her how she loved that princess shayla was the wild force team’s mom and she was like aww yeah i felt such a maternal instinct even though that was before i had my actual child!! shes so cute!! shes so pretty!!

- jessica rey is literally SO WONDERFUL AND FUN TO TALK TO we went to hang out bc tabby wanted her wild force dvd signed and she was just telling us her stories of hanging out w/ the other boys and how she went to drink w/ azim just to keep him company (bc peter and yoshi were there and they were like “we dont drink” nerds) so cuuute and then she had that pic of her and peter and yoshi and they’re making stupid faces and she’s smiling like an angel and she’s like THEY DIDNT TELL ME IT WASNT A SERIOUS PHOTO and i asked her jokingly how much for it and she was like take it its $30 and i was like pls charge me more have my money take my soul

- tabby and kat were at the megaforce booths and jessica rey came over and was like “excuse me what are you guys doing with MY GIRLS” and john mark was like “uh they’re OUR GIRLS” and then cameron pulled jessica over and was like “actually this is MY babe” and then she tried to leave bc she was in the way of ppl in line and azim stopped her and was like “no no stay you’re part of our FAMILY”and uh basically the power rangers family is the cutest family in the whole world thank you good night

- taylor swift wrote gorgeous about andrew gray

[youareunbearable]

Little rant about Indigenous media

Now i don’t wanna be That Bitch about this, but im SO. TIRED. about how much Indigenous media is grimdark, even if it’s playing off as a funny comedy like Smoke Signals, it’s still rooted in so much trauma and im tired of it. 

I’m TIRED of being reminded how much my people suffered, and continue to suffer. I’m TIRED of watching Indigenous women on the screen get raped, and kidnapped, and abused, and trapped in loveless marriages, and KILLED. I’m TIRED of watching Indigenous men abuse, use violence instead of words to solve their problems, watching them lie and cheat, watching them get lost to substance abuse, watching them be terrible fathers, watching them go through the prison system again and again, watching them kill and get KILLED.

If I wanted to watch that kinda stuff i’d go watch the fucking news, or go to my Indigenous studies classes (which im doing my honours spec for in uni),  or take a walk around the rez with my cousins as they talk about family drama, except it’ll be less depressing cause my family doesn’t let these things define them and move forward. Not like the movies or books, who seem to think that the only type of Indigenous person is one that is neck deep in their intergenerational trauma.

Whats the point of Reconciliation if we still let ourselves be lost in the pain? whats the point of moving forward if we let ourselves be defined by our history? We survived and are currently surviving GENOCIDE, we are a resilient people who will KEEP surviving! I’ve never met an Indigenous person that doesn’t have a sense of humour, or hasn’t suffered in someway but isnt letting that define them! We get back up! We spit on our attackers, laugh, and don’t let them shove us around again, then use that experience as a funny story to tell at a beading circle next week!! 

SO WHY??? IS INDIGENOUS MEDIA SO DARK?? I wanna laugh!! I don’t want to be reminded why I’m scared of police officers, or why my grandma isn’t with me anymore, or why I keep losing family members, or why I’m scared of walking home alone, or why I’m scared to bring children into this world!!! This isn’t enjoyable!!! 

Make a bannock joke!!! Have a movie about lacrosse like its a sports anime!! Where is my mother daughter film where the mom tries to teach the daughter traditional art styles but the kid is “too cool” for that old lady stuff and then realizes that she does enjoy it if she puts a modern twist on it!!! Where is my father son bonding film where the dad is trying to help his son grow into a proper man despite the lack of parenting he had (cause of residential schools) so the son can ask that one girl out to prom!!!! Where is my dumb B-rated chickflick of Young and Hip Indigenous women trying to get dates for the next social and they all have over exaggerated drama and adventures along the way!!! Where is my dumb guy movie that’s basically like a Will Ferrel movie but with old Native guys instead that i can complain about how stupid and a waste of money it was after i walk out of the theatre!!!! 

Lets stop making me watch films that basically give me PTSD after watching, or making book that i have to put down and hide away because theyre children youre doing this to children!!! I wanna have FUN and im TIRED of HURTING and feeling emotionally stretched out and reminded of every bad thing that happened to my family and will probably happen to ME, a Young, Two-spirited, Indigenous, Woman living in CANADA in 2019, cause this country is actively trying to KILL US and RIP APART OUR FAMILIES!!!!

Why can’t I forget about that?? for an hour??? by watching a dumb film???? Why do I have to be reminded that my country hates me and my people and always has every time i open a book or watch a movie??? 

[recluserat]

Rewatching the OC

I decided to rewatch through the OC and here are some thoughts I had on S1E1:

Love how the first scene the just had "CHINO" spray panted across a wall behind the actors to show that they were in Chino. Think that's funny.

How did that cop know that they were stealing that car? They drove by after the window had been smashed and it would have just looked like a guy standing next to a car since it was kinda dark. Also where did the other two cop cars come from so quickly???

How is Trey (the older brother) only looking at 3-5 years for 1) stealing a car 2) crashing said car 3) having a gun in his pants while stealing said car 4) having pot in his jacket while stealing said car and 5) having multiple priors??? Like sure he's white but this was a poor area and he had multiple priors. Would have thought more like 10-15 for a "light" sentence. Maybe I just don't know the avg. sentences for this stuff.

Also I feel like there's a better way to steal an old car like that other than just smashing in the window. He was begging to get caught.

Ryan says social security is theorized to run out by 2025... is that true? I need to do some research on that...

Also, love how the writers went "we'll make him really smart and we'll show that by him saying the same edgelord type of 'nothing matters, society sucks' philosophy we find online from other teenagers! Perfect!"

Sandy telling a kid he just met that he's stupid and weak feels a little weird but maybe that's because I know these characters

We are only 3 mins in... yikes.

Love the early 2000s mens wardrobe. Ryan's hoodie and leather jacket slays. And his slutty little almost choker necklace? Bring that fashion style back, please men I'm begging you.

Oh good. Mom's exposition time is here to tell us his dad's also in jail.

We finally reached the theme song and I am so grateful for it. This song slaps so hard. Top tier 2000s teen show intro.

Malewife Sandy with his wife being the primary breadwinner. Iconic, esp for the time.

Ryan and I smoke the same brand of cigarettes. Fun fact.

"Who are you?" "Whoever you want me to be?" SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP

He had a lighter, why not just light her cigarette normally. Rizz is through the roof.

He's trying so hard to look tough, its so funny.

Love Sandy. He's so funny. His facial expressions are great.

His white wifebeater tanktop is so iconic. I bought one when I first saw the show because I loved his outfits despite the fact that I was (and still am) a chick.

Seth is also so funny.

But the fact that he named his boat after a chick he's never spoken to before is wild. Makes sense for a teenage boy though.

Sandy's so good to Ryan. The tie scene is so sweet.

I forgot everyone thinks Ryan's from different places.

How is Marissa gonna say she doesn't know if Ryan is a cousin or a poolboy when she was the once who decided he was the cousin???

Ryan is so unbothered it's funny. Some dude's sobbing in the bathroom. Not his problem.

The All American Rejects song really adds to the time period of this show.

This show really did not prepare me for what high school parties would be like. Maybe I just didn't grow up in the right tax bracket.

I did have to skip the part where Seth yells at him at the party. It kinda hurts to watch. A necessary evil tho.

I am sad Ryan got his ass handed to him but to be fair it was like 5 vs 1.5 (Seth only half counts)

L friends leaving marissa passed out on her back on her back porch. Take her back with yall. Damn.

Ryan is so lucky no one was out to see him carrying a passed out girl to his bed. Also how did she grab around him if she's so passed out??? Whatever.

"He has a family Sandy. It's not up to you to decide if they're good enough." Except he didn't? Ryan literally called him asking for help because his mom kicked him out and her boyfriend beat him up. Sandy didn't decide shit. L wife.

The breakfast scene is so funny. Just the way the wife (idk her name) was put in the position to immediately feel bad about kicking him out as he pulls like a kicked puppy act. Comedy gold.

Seth PUT THOSE CONCRETE GRIPPERS AWAY

Seth and Ryan's friendship is so cute. He met this dude like 24 hours ago and he wants to go visit him in Chino. Adorable, we love positive male bonding here.

Good news, Marissa survived. And she didn't even look hungover. Good for her. I mean other than the douche-y boyfriend.

Thank goodness Sandy stuck around after dropping Ryan off because there's no way that boy would have called him for help again. He would have just tried to figure it out. Bless his heart.

This show slaps so hard, can't wait to finish rewatching it because high key I don't think I ever actually finished it the first time.

[yourjughead]

Krakens

Sweet Pea x Reader

A/N: I'm heading into exams so I'm not sure how many fics will be posted over the next week if any. I'll do my best my loves.

-------------------------------------------------

You lay tangled with Sweet Pea in his trailer, Friday night buzzing around outside. The both of you cocooned away from it all. Your phone alarm buzzed, Sweet Pea sighing loudly.

“I gotta go, family will be wondering where I am”

“And when are you going to tell them where you actually are”

“Hmmm when you clean this trailer” you winked, grabbing your coat from the disgruntled kitchen, Sweet Pea following you closely, rolling his eyes.

“I want to meet your family ynn, it's only right. We've been going out almost a year. I feel like you're ashamed of me or something” he looked to the ground and you took his face in your hands. He held them there, loving the feel of your delicate touch.

“Of course I'm not! You've met my friends and they're miles more important to me than my family”

“Still though…”

“They're just really classist and terrible people. I know my parents would have loved you of that's any consolation”. Your parents had died when you were 13 then you were shipped off from your home, to Riverdale, to live with your aunt and uncle. Imagine Cheryl Blossoms parents but miles worse and miles wealthier. They could buy the Blossoms 10 times over. While your own parents were wealthy, they didn't half flaunt it as much and wanted to raise you as a hard working, fair woman not a social snob with and ego to match like your cousin of the same age.

“I still want to meet them”

“And have them forbid me from seeing you?! After all Northsiders aren't supposed to really be friends with Southsiders” You pulled from him suddenly

“Well that would be kinda hot not going to lie” he caught your hips and buried his face in your neck as you giggled. You pulled his head to meet your lips briefly before flying for the door before he could stop you again.

“Bye Sweets, love you"

“Yeah yeah whatever” he turned to face away from you. This conversation always ended the same, with you avoiding a straight answer.

Sweet Pea POV

To say I was nervous was putting it lightly. I was shaking in my boots. Jughead and Toni helped me find a suit. I had to bribe them both into keeping what I was doing quiet. Especially from Fangs, if he knew I was dressed in a suit for yn hed call me whipped and never let it go.

I arrived at the address and wow it was fancy, too fancy for me. Ynn was right, this was a bad idea.

“Sweets!” I heard her beautiful voice as I was about to turn around and bolt out the door. Wow. She looked amazing.

“What do you think?” She gave a little twirl in her almost ball gown. I couldn't actually speak, my mouth was dry.

“I'll take that as a good sign” she laughed, taking my hand in hers she pulled me deeper into this world she didn't seem to fit into. Or at least the ynn I know didn't fit in. It was prissy and snobby and perfect in a way that was unsettling and false. Not like my ynn at all and yet she seemed to be like a chameleon in this world. I'm really going to try for her. As I thought this I ran smack bang into a waiter sending his tray to the floor. I was instant apologies and attempted to assist him, to which he looked at me like I had three heads.

“I know it's awful but we just have to walk away” she whispered, dragging me off. It was awful. Even I thought it was a terrible thing to do and I've done some shocking things.

She pulled me to the side of the room out of sight briefly, pulling me into a kiss.

“ready sweets?”

“As much as one can be”

“Where's your tattoo?” I looked to the floor.

“I covered it, Toni did it, I thought it might be better”

“I hate it”

“Me too” I laughed, meeting her eyes again. I'm glad she agrees.

“I don't like your hair all combed like that either”

“Wow you're working wonders for my confidence and I was going to say you're the most beautiful girl i've ever seen but I'll just have to say something mean instead…you're only the second most beautiful girl I've ever seen...that doesn't even sound slightly believable” I smirked and she blushed.

“No I just mean I like the way you're normally dressed”

“I like when you're not dressed at all” she shoved me laughing.

“I'd nearly prefer that then this stupid dress”

“I think you look gorgeous” smile to match.

“I think you look uncomfortable”

“Yn, I promise everything will be fine”

Then I met the krakens that were her aunt and uncle. Terrible people as promised. Snooty, snobbish socialites who made their money off YNs parents and wouldn't know hard work if it hit them. I wanted to hit them.

“And what do your parents do?” even though I was I was much taller than her aunt, she still managed to look down her nose at me. Yn squeezed my hand, so far I had fended off every rude question and snide remark, I wasn't doing terribly. I had told them SP stood for Steven Paul, thought my actual name would raise less questions but I could tell it made ynn sad I had to lie. Yn tried not to laugh at my ridiculous alias.

“Pharmacists” that's not a total lie. Ynn had to look away from me to stop herself from laughing. I didn't have a great relationship with my parents, if one at all but it wasn't a sore topic for me, I was simply used to them being crappy.

“Oh what part of pharmacy?” Her uncle finally pried his eyes off the young waitress serving us to listen to me.

“Emm, Mom's in production and dad...dad works in dispensing” I bit the inside of my cheek to stop a laugh from rising. Yn couldn't and let a small one slip.

“What's so funny YN YLN?” Her aunt bit. I didn't like the way they used her Dad's last name like a curse. I can tell she felt the same. My turn to squeeze her hand under the table for reassurance.

“Nothing” she looked back to her plate of untouched food. She seemed immensely uncomfortable around them, I felt more at home than she did and that says a lot.

“Yn, sit up straight for Christ sake, SP wouldn't want to be seen with someone the posture of a troglodyte!” Her uncle alongside me snapped.  Yn adjusted.

The same waitress her uncle had been fawning over moved to serve water. Her Uncle slipped his hand around her leg causing her to jump and dump the jug of water all over me and the table.

“Argh!” I stood to me feet instantly at the cold, yn grabbing napkins and coming to my aid.

“Oh yn you giant cluts!” Her aunt shouted.

“But I-”

“Go get some proper towels you useless little girl!” Ugh they make my blood boil.

“No no, the napkins are fine, thanks YN" I removed my drenched suit jacket and began dabbing my face and neck with the napkin. Her uncle had us swiftly moved to another table. I continued to dry myself off as we sat back down.

“Yn you really must be more careful” her uncle repremained her and it was killing me. I can see now more than ever why she wanted to keep this world from me.

“SP, what's that on your neck?” Her aunt began squinting and I covered over my tattoo again with tissue. I must have wiped the makeup off. Shit shit shit.

“It's his Serpent tattoo” the whole table, including myself looked confused and shocked at yns suddenly brave voice.

“His what?” I could feel my neck reddening.

“Serpent tattoo, you get one when you join the Serpents, like Sweet Pea here. Yup, his name is Sweet Pea not Steven Paul or whatever witness protection program sounding name he said.” She tilted her head challengingly in their direction. Wow I'm turned on by this.

“I don't understand” her uncle could just manage.

“I'm dating a Serpent, simple as. I have been for the past year, I've even been to the Whyte Wyrm”

“You shut your mouth young lady before someone hears you!”

“I hope they do! I'm sick of you people! I love Sweet Pea, gangs and gun violence and all! When I'm 18 I'm taking back everything my parents gave you awful awful people because you sure as hell don't deserve it!” She then stormed off in the direction of the car parks

“Ahem well, lovely meeting you….No actually not really, you don't deserve to have yn in your lives and by the way, I scratched the side of your car with my bike” I followed her quickly then, leaving them stunned and confused.

I ran out to see yn leaning against my bike I had parked around the corner to avoid being seen.

“You look hot”

“I'm sorry I blew your cover, I'm just really over being their puppet”

“That's okay, I was going to say something eventually” I pulled her into my chest, shielding her from the cold and a world she didn't belong to.

“Do you think I could live you for awhile Sweets? Just till I'm 18, then my inheritance will be unfrozen”

“Oh, a girl with money, hot” she bumped me with her hip before clawing herself back into my chest.

“I'd love if you'd live with me” she smiled before running her hand through my hair to return it to its normal messy texture.

“Much better, I can actually kiss you now without thinking is this boy going to try to sell me stocks after” I grinned into the kiss we shared. I love my Northsider girlfriend.

---------------------------------

Much love Xx

[choisgirls]

Hoi! I mean hi! So ummmmm idk if ur still doing requests but....* is shy for no reason ahdnfn* could you do a rfa+V+ Saeran wrap ( yes I call him that) where mc has a service dog because they have ptsd or something like that...???

A/N: Hi love! Sorry ittook so long, but no need to be shy! You’re free to stop by any time~ I’ll domy best here. I’ve never experienced PTSD /myself/ so I did some research andtook what I knew from previous psych and health classes, but still felt if Iwere to… attempt to reference PTSD itself, I wouldn’t have represented it sowell ^^;;; so im sorry it’s a little vague there, i went more for how they’d react to the dog!! But i hope this is okay!!

(and no worries, iused to call saeran that all the time~)

Masterlist~

*YOOSUNG:

               -He honestly thought you justreally liked your dog and wanted to bring it along

               -But if you’re comfortableenough to tell him, “Hey, this is my service dog” he’ll freak out

               -Because!!! He didn’t know!!!He’s been trying to pet the dog this whole time and your baby was just tryingto do its job, MC, he’s so sorry

               -Out of all of them though, yourdog is the safest in his hands

               -??? He’s in school to be a vet,of course your baby is safest in his hands

               -Not to mention, he was aroundhis cousin when she had a dog she relied on for support and help as well, sohe’s actually really glad you have your service pup because he knows how muchof a difference they can make

*ZEN:

               -When you tell him that yousuffer from something like PTSD, he’s immediately concerned for you. Are youalright? What can he do to help you through the harder times?

               -Extremely relieved to hear youhave a companion- questioned once if it was another man and was only 73%joking.

               -Was nervous at first because?If it’s a pet he really hopes it isn’t a cat… he’d try to suffer through hisallergy but knows he wouldn’t be able to. But you would’ve told him in thebeginning that you had a cat… wouldn’t you have?

               -Upon finding out you have adog, he’s head over heels. He can see how much the dog cares about you and howstrong they are. Respects that they’re so professional

               -But you have to scold him everynow and then when he’s spoiling the dog. Yes love and care is always needed foryour service dog but giving them too many treats is bad, Zen, stop

               -Hey if you need your dog towork out, ya know, he can take them on jogs with him. Totally not because hewants to test his endurance against your dogs. Nope, not at all

 *JAEHEE:

               -Honestly surprised by yourservice dog?

               -She isn’t afraid of dogs persay but sometimes she’s wary of them. The smaller they are, the meaner theyare. “They have less space to diffuse their anger, MC.”

               -When she first met your servicedog and they stood at attention she just stared at them, engaging in a staringcontest. She whispered to you, “Can they sense fear???”

               -A long conversation and lots ofcomforting touches later, she realized why you need the comfort of your servicedog and see’s them in a completely new light

               -Knew dogs were a humans bestfriend but didn’t know that they could be this reliable and understanding

               -Actually goes to your dog whenshe’s upset as well, but is sure never to overwhelm them because you are theirmain priority always and refuses to upset either of you

*JUMIN:

               -He was pretty much against thedog because? What if it hurts his dear Elizabeth? He would never accept that

               -Unless you tell him that, uh,you kinda need your baby. They’re your service dog and they help you out witheveryday life sometimes

               -Then he’ll offer to sit downand talk it out with you

               -Because in a way, Elizabethbecame a sort of therapy cat of his own, so hearing how your dog helps youthrough things like PTSD, he’ll come up with something the two of you couldwork out.

               -Honestly though? Your dog isn’tgoing to harm Elizabeth and once he observes them for a while and realizesthat, he’ll actually grow to enjoy your dogs company

               -Says he doesn’t, but he spoilsyour dog when you aren’t looking. He’ll give them belly rubs, expensive collarsand vests, and he definitely makes sure they’re allowed into everywhere you go-if they weren’t allowed before, they are now

*SAEYOUNG:

               -Honestly when you tell him he’sbasically like “Yeah, that’s okay, no problem MC! I like dogs!” You’vegone through some heavy stuff, if your dog helps you then of /COURSE/ he’s okaywith it. Tries to be calm, cool, collected, c h i l l. But it changes when heactually meets your dog.

               -He’s created a whole new socialmedia following for them. Their Instagram is full of amazing pictures of themlooking majestic, strong, and at attention- ya know, working.

               -Doesn’t try to distract yourdog at all, just admires him from afar and loves to watch the two of youinteract

               -Though sometimes he /does/ usesome of his agent training to see if he can sneak around and get close to you-kind of like testing your dog. “I’m training them to be even better,MC!”

               -You admit that it is prettyfunny to watch him dangle from on top of the bookshelf to give you a kiss whileyour dog furiously barks at him to get down and away from you

               -10/10 supporter of dressing upyour dog. They are his cosplay buddy and he’s very happy. It’s not taking themaway from their job, MC! They’re just dressed up! It’s okay!

 *JIHYUN:

               -Thrilled!

               -Jumin tried multiple times whenJihyun was having eyesight troubles to get a service dog to help him out, andat one point he seriously considered it

               -So he’s done research on how totreat them, care for them, things of the sort and will remember all of that sohe can interact correctly with your dog!

               -Respects his distance and letsyour dog get used to him before ever petting him or even ghosting his fingersover any part of you.

               -Forgot once and hugged you frombehind- you were alright with it because you heard him walk up but your servicedog blew up. Constant barking, pulling on his pants leg, trying to get inbetween the two of you. You thought it was funny but Jihyun didn’t walk upbehind the two of you for a few weeks

               -Loves your service dog andloves how much love they have for you, instantly accepts them as part of yourlittle family- he can trust them to take care of you when he’s away

 *SAERAN:

               -You’ve been through some stuff,he’s been through some stuff too- respects that you may need some help withdealing with it all, so he’s totally okay with your dog. Wants to fightwhatever haunts you though

               -Honestly, I can see the /dog/being the one to initiate the relationship with Saeran

               -Because they’re trained tosense the negative emotions and distress in people, so of course they couldsense Saeran’s

               -But obviously they’re trainedfor you and you’re their main priority, so he kind of just pushes the dog awayfrom him because??? Leave me alone?? You’re MC’s?? Take care of them??

               -Tries to pretend that hedoesn’t like their attention, but he does. When they jump up and lay next tohim, head in his lap, he can’t help but scratch behind their ear and ithonestly is relaxing but he won’t tell you

               -THE DOG TAKES YOUR PLACE IN THEBED SOMETIMES. If you come to bed late, your dog’s laying there instead.They’re cuddling. Neither of them move. What little bitches

[crieativity]

So I decided to design my own version of the characters from the hobbit and lord of the rings. Of course, me being me, we both know I’ll start with the hobbit. 

We have Thorin II Oakenshield, son of Thráin, son of Thror, King Under the Mountain.

Fíli and Kíli, sons of Dís, daughter of Thráin.

And finally, Dís, daughter of Thráin, son of Thror.

THORIN II OAKENSHIELD

•Thorin has white hair since that’s part of his description in the book, instead of a blue hood, I gave him this outfit instead, he has more piercings here and the only gold item is the nose ring he has.

•He is demisexual homoromantic.

•He kind of favours Fíli over Kíli and disapproves of Kíli’s choice of weaponry.

•He sucks at flirting. (Like he is a disaster with it. He’ll accidentally insult you by saying something he means to be nice and romantic)

•Despite his favouritism, he’s still a walking mother hen with both his nephews (or any children under his care)

•After he snaps out of his gold sickness, he shears his beard.

•He kisses Bilbo with his dying breath.

•Ignore that, he marries Bilbo after he recovers from his wounds.

•Then they have magical dwobbit babies together.(Frodo is defo the eldest)

•The reason why he wears a shirt is because he has to hide a tattoo he got after a drunken night with Dwalin. (Dwalin dared him to do it, he swears.)

•Is actually dyslexic. 

•Helps friends and fam with carving out Stoneborn children, (this is vital to the story I’m writing.)

•Nearly cries when Bilbo cuts his hair short in Rivendell. (He swore vengeance there but Bilbo shot down the idea before it even left his lips.)

•Is the world’s biggest sap

•I’m not even joking. 

•Fairly decent cook on the road, horrible one at home

•He doesn’t know why it happens

•It just does

FÍLI

•Is given the book description, now with more beard and hair.

•Looks serious, but has occasional mischief.

•Has vitiligo.

•Is actually pretty damn vain with his appearance.

•Pan Pan

•Meets an elf in Mirkwood named Anoriel, this time it was he that pulled the ‘i could have anything down my trousers’ trick on her. (Except its more like loincloth haha) She actually sticks her hand down there and she honestly didn’t want to know why there’s a dagger there. (She also screamed while Fíli was blushing hard)

•Is more sedate than Kíli.

•But that doesn’t mean he’s not a flirt

•He is

•He’s a big flirt (he’s a crown prince baby you can trust him)

•The sash indicates that he is the heir to Thorin.

•At first he was self conscious of his vitiligo but Balin (who also has vitiligo) helped him through it.

•Despite being Thorin’s clear favourite, he is actually way closer to Balin.

•Is Thorin’s wingman, he can weave poetry out of thin air.

•When he smiles, he’ll knock you down, you’ll fall apart. (and you thought you were so smart)

•Hates mornings. Like he will death glare the floor until he’s properly awake.

•Can’t stand spicy food.

•Loves weird food instead. (Chicken intestines, pig’s blood stew, blood cubes, etc.)

•Has never gotten drunk in his life.

•He doesn’t want to see what’ll happen if he does,

•Has a tendency to clean his nails with the tips of his knives. (Uncle Thorin nearly got a heart attack when he began doing it.)

•Despite his lesser amount of clothing, he still has an impossible amount of knives.

•They’re in his hair.

•Don’t touch his hair.

•He’s very ticklish but he has a knee jerk reaction so tickle him and you’re dead.

•I’m not sure if he means it in the funny friendly human way.

•Is Dís’s little lion

KÍLI

•Follows book description too

•BEARD BUN

•Hides his insecurities behind smiles and pranks

•Dís’s little ray of sunshine

•Gay as sin

•Prefers archery and knows a crap tonne about survival in the wilderness.

•Is engaged to Thorin III Stonehelm (in this verse, they throw the word cousin around freely for people they trust even if they’re not even related. Just pretend they’re not related)

•Doesn’t care for fancy stuff, literally just goes for what he has on hand.

•Loves sweets to death.

•See that ring? That’s Thorin III’s courting gift to him. (It’s a family heirloom passed down from Thorin III’s Great grandfather to his grandfather and so on and so forth.) it’s practically worthless but it was passed down due to the fact that it was a safety charm made with love by Thorin III’s great grandmother for his great grandfather.

•Doesn’t have anything against elves, but he does like to rile them up cause of the faces they make.

•Is fond of dancing and singing on tables when drunk.

•Don’t let him get drunk.

•He’s a happy clingy drunk.

•Has the worst self esteem among the line of Durin. Is scared of friends, fam and lovers leaving him.

•Likes (Loves) fruit pies

•Socially awkward child. Does not know how to do court etiquette (dwarven court etiquette)

•Very unsure about Thorin Oakenshield’s affection for him and thinks that Fíli is the only one that matters in fam.

•But he still loves them all the same

DÍS

•Has trimmed beard to mourn her husband’s death

•Scary with daggers and throwing knives

•Loves Dáin’s war pigs to death (especially his personal boar, Bubbles)

•a bit short tempered but knows how to mask it very well

•Very close to Frerin but when he was “gone” (not dead because I’ve got a story for that) she was very devastated and clung to Thorin since Frerin can’t be there to comfort her anymore

•Likes honey biscuits

•Good at tattooing and blacksmithing

•The gem of Ered Luin and the Light of Erebor

•She met Bilbo once and the two were amicable to each other, Bilbo baked her a crap tonne of sweets and pastries while she gave him tips on home repair.

•In the verse I made, she sucker punches Thorin when she reached Erebor for being dumb before proceeding to aggressively coddle and cuddle her brother and sons back to health

•Married husband who’s a simple miner

•Had to give Thorin a bit of an earful before they were allowed to court.

•Favours a battle axe over any other weapon (Dwalin was so proud)

•The last to find out about Kíli’s courtship and all because she caught Thorin III and her son giving very affectionate forehead bumps and hair tugging.

•She was not pleased

•She demanded they at least start over since they didn’t have much time for courting before Kíli and Thorin separated due to the quest and all.

•Is scary awesome with sparring, in a group thing she always groups with Dwalin, Dáin and Dori and they always win when they fight against different groups.

•She doesn’t tell Bilbo that he’s welcome to the family since she already saw him as a member long before Bilbo was even courted by her daft brother.

•Gave Kíli his tattoo and Fíli got his tattoos from her too.

•Isn’t really okay with elves but since Fíli’s One is an elf, she tries to be fine with it.

•Loves to dance.

•Enjoys making food like sinigang and afritada only since it’s middle earth I guess it has different names?

•Is Dáin and Dwalin’s drinking buddy.

•Thorin thought it was Dwalin that got him that tattoo. But in truth it was her.

•She was against it but he kept insisting he’s fiiine so okay fine but he shouldn’t come crying to her if he doesn’t like the tattoo.

•During her free time, she likes to travel to visit Bilbo when they arrange a meeting in Bree.

•She kinda got attached to Bilbo ok they’re bffs

•When she finds out Bilbo can have babies she’s over the moon and just gets excited since she didn’t know he could carry and are they gonna have an announcement soon does Thorin know and are they trying for one

•When Frodo’s born she almost cried when Bilbo calls her the godmother. (She doesn’t know what it means but bilbo explains that should anything happen to him or Thorin - knock on wood- she will be in charge of Frodo.)

•Absolutely loves to spoil any children.

•And I mean ANY children.

[babylon-bitch]

Just Friends (part 17)

My parents and I have arrived at our house in England. I love this house, it's full of childhood memories. Like the time I caught my finger in the door and Josh shut the door, causing my finger to break. Fun times. "So the boys are here around 6, and every one is coming round in an hour or so." My mum informs my dad and I. "What's the time now?" I ask. "Half four." My dad answers for her. I nod and text Luke saying I got here safely, because I kinda forgot to tell him (even thouh he was on my mind the whole flight), I guess I was busy with unpacking. Me: hey sorry I forgot to text you when we got here, I was busy. X Luke: its fine :) when are you going to see everyone? X Me: well it's half  four now, and they are coming in an hour or so, the boys are coming at 6. It must be around 2 or something there. Am I keeping you awake? X Luke: no, can't sleep. You jet lagged? X Me: a bit, but I slept most of the flight. X Luke and I continue to talk for half an hour before he decided to go to bed (and me nagging him to). "I'm going to go freshen up." I say, because I'm in a hoodie and some sweatpants. I change into a cropped sweatshirt and some jeans. Putting on some light make up and brushing my hair through, I spray some perfume to finish. I've got 15 minutes so I'll paint my nails. Looking through all my nail polish, I decide to go with black. I buy so many different colours, yet I always seem to go for black. Eh 10 minutes later I'm done and they are all dry. I fucked one up though, I'm quite good at painting them, I just don't have the patience. Going down the stairs and walking into the kitchen. Grabbing an apple and a knife, I walk to the lounge again. "Prison Break huh?" I ask my dad. "Yeah, I was planning on taking some notes." He jokes and I laugh slightly. "Funny." I sarcastically reply. I cut a slice of apple and putting it my mouth. "Door!" I call out. "You couldn't possibly get it?" My mum huffs as she walks in. "My legs broke." "Lazy cow." She mutters. "Heard that!" I shout out to her. "Hello!" I hear loads of people cheer. Suddenly realising that I have a huge family, a lot of cousins, it's only me, Evie, Josh, and Angus that are the older ones. My mother and father had me and my brother's quite young, as well as Evie's parents. I have loads of small children cousins. Everyone was around my grandparents house and then they all came here. As dad has joined us again this Christmas, we have even more people. My mum and I cooked a load of food before hand, well some of it is still cooking. I walk towards the door, where everyone is take off their coats and shit. "Hello." I greet. "Harper! How are you?" My grandmother asks. "I'm good thanks, you?" I reply. "I'm very well, thank you. It still amazes me at how beautiful are, I swear you get even more beautiful every time I see you! Long legs, lovely hair, beautiful body shape." My grandma gushes. "Aww grandma stop!" I smile in embarrassment. "All the boys must be all over you!" She winks. A certain boy comes to mind, causing my face break into a huge smile. "Well, I have my moments." I joke. She laughs and walks through. "Har Har!" My cousin Toby beams as he attaches himself to my legs. "Hello." I say poking his little stomach. My other cousin Emily latches onto my legs as well. "Babe, I can't hold both of you." I tell her. "Well I could, but I don't want." "Why do I attract children?" I ask my aunt Lauren. "Because you are so kind and caring." She smiles. Lauren walks past me, "and keep them with you for a while, they've been latched onto me all afternoon." She whispers into my ear. "You evil son of a-" "Children around." She cuts me off. Reuben and Lilly walk off with Lauren, so I'm left with Toby in my arms and Emily at my feet. "Oh fine, c'mere." I give in and scoop up Emily and we walk off towards the lounge. "Aww look." My mum cooes. I roll my eyes and put toby and Emily down. Sitting down on the floor, because all the seats are taken. Reuben picks up the knife, I had for my apple. "No!" I quickly say and take it of him. Deciding I'm done with it, I walk into the kitchen and put it in the bin. "So Harper, how is life in Australia?" My uncle Robert asks as I walk in. "Um, same old really. School is quite busy, hanging out with friends." I answer as Lilly plays with my hair. "Oh, how is Luke and um the others?" Lauren questions. "Umm, they are good, they are all going on tour in March, we're all excited for that." I reply. "I would've done anything to be friends with a band when I was younger. Just seeing them in their element." My grandpa chimes in. "It is nice, seeing the people you love be so happy." I smile and bite my lip remembering all the fun times we've all had. Everyone drifts into a conversation about their childhood, and all the retro stuff they had. A piece of paper is thrust upon me by Emily. "What do you want me to do with this?" I chuckle. "Draw." She demands. "Dance monkey, dance." I joke. I pick up a coloured pencil and start doodling. Why do I seem to attract all the children? They're constantly poking me, playing with my hair, making me play games. Don't get me wrong, I love them to bits, why me? Why not aunt Lauren? After 15 minutes of drawing, I lay on the floor letting out a groan. I'm too tired for this. Hopefully Evie and the boys will be here soon, so I can 'play' with them. "Is it hard work having four kids prodding you and making you play imaginary games?" Lauren questions in amusement. "Yes, but it's not as bad because I'm just colouring and being poked." I her. "Like why do they keep poking me with pencils making me spaz out?" I claim. "Well, I have to deal with it 24/7." She laughs. I hear the sound of a camera shutter going off, and I groan. "Why?" I half-heartedly chuckle. "Because it's funny." My mum says. I roll over onto my side (very sociable with my back towards everyone) and pull my phone out, scrolling through instagram. "Kids these days." I hear someone mutter. "Heard that." I mumble. "The three other devils will be here in a couple of minutes." My mum informs everyone. "Oh my God, the four of them all together. Prepare for some sass, moody teenagers, and anti-sociable teens." Robert says. "Hey we aren't that bad." I defend turning over. "Pfff, yeah right." My dad adds. I roll my eyes and get a drink. "Plus the others aren't teenagers." I call over my shoulder. The doorbell goes off and I race towards it, I need some people my own age. "Josh!" I grin. "Hey lil' sis." He greets. I roll my eyes and hug him anyway. "I'm glad your here, I need people my age." I sigh. "I take it a bunch or 3 to 6 year olds aren't doing it for you?" Evie questions as I pull her into a hug. "Nope." I reply. "Har Har!" Angus teases. "The amount of times I've been called that this afternoon." I shake my head head, and Angus pulls me into a hug. We all walk through to the lounge, and a bunch of kids come running towards us. Everyone says their hellos and gives out hugs. "Right, let's get seating arrangements sorted." My mum says to the adults. Us four go into the the lounge. "So how was Dubai?" Evie asks. "I saw your Instagram, and it looked really cool." Josh adds. "Yeah, it was really nice. Luke and I had been drifting apart, and it brought us closer together, well I think at least." I say replaying the moment Luke and I kissed. "Yeah, that picture your mum posted on her Instagram, was well... you tell me." Evie smirks. "Since when did mum have social media at all?" I panick. Angus pulls his phone out and shows me, I scroll through it. "So that's where those people have been getting those pictures." I realise. I look at the photo, and its me facing Luke and sitting on his lap, with my arms resting on his shoulders, and Luke's hands on my waist. I mean, it looks cute. "So what's going there, Harps?" Josh smirks. "For the last time, we are just friends." I huff. It's true we are just friends at this moment in time. "Yep." Evie hums. I roll my eyes. "So how's uni?" I ask. "Really busy, I've got a couple of pieces of 'home work' to do whilst I'm home." Josh replys. "We went to this crazy party, the other weekend and we all got smashed." Angus tells me." "Dude! Why did you tell her?" Josh scolds. "It's not like Harper hasn't gotten wasted before." Angus points out. "Eh, I've had my moments." I admit. "I bet you drunkenly made out Luke, or at least one of the boys." Evie laughs. "Oh my God, your worse than the fans." I laugh. "She definitely ships you two, like her life depends on it." Josh pokes at Evie. "I just think they'd be cute together." She shrugs. "You've only met him like three times." I claim. "Harps, pass the remote." Josh asks, extending his hand out. "Catch." I tell him and throw it at him but it hits Evie in the head. "Shit! Ouch!" Evie shouts. "Still after 17, nearly 18 years, you still can't throw for shit." Angus teases. "Shut up, it's not my fault Evie has a big head." I laugh. "Bitch." She mutters. "Bish." A little voice says. I look down and see Lilly. "No, don't say that. It's a bad word." Evie scolds. "But you said it." She says. "Like to watch how this pans out." I laugh. "Well, I'm a grow-" Evie gets cut off by Lilly running off screaming "bish!" I love children's pronunciation. I quickly get up and chase after her. "What are you doing, you little rascal." I laugh as scoop her up. "Harper!" She squeals. I put her down and she runs off towards her parents. Laughing as I walk with her into the kitchen. "How long till dinner?" I ask. "In a couple of minutes, so go sit down." My mum says as if I'm a child. Walking towards the others and picking up my phone. "Mum wants us to sit down." I tell them. They all nod and stand up. Angus walks up to me and turns around. "What are you doing?" I chuckle. "Jump on." He orders and lowers himself a bit. I scream at first and then burst into a fit of laughter. "Now I get on." Josh jokes as he clutches my shoulders. "No!" I warn. "It feels like Christmas." Evie claims. "Yeah, but that's not until 5 days." I point out. "Angus what are you doing?" I ask. He doesn't saying anything besides just dropping on to the sofa. "Fuck you." I laugh. "Aww." He teases but brings me into a hug, I shrug him off and walk towards the table. "Where are we sitting?" Josh asks Lauren. "That table." She point to a small table with four chairs around. "Guys, I think Lauren got the wrong table." Evie snickers as she sits at the children's table. I burst out laughing, because her knees are nearly by her shoulders. I sit next to her and the boys join us. Getting my phone, and taking a picture. "We are so weird." Josh chuckles. I stand up and sit at the suitable table. "How is Emily and Toby supposed to eat on their own?" Angus wonders. "They're three years old, I think they can manage." I answer. Emily and Toby are twins who are 3, Lilly is 5, and Reuben is the oldest being 6. After a couple of minutes of us all on our phones Josh speaks up "I thought we were supposed to be eating." "Well, while we wait, I'll put some music on." I reason. I start playing I Wish It Could Be Christmas Everyday by Wizzard. *** Many Christmas songs, meaningless conversations, and stuffed stomachs later, dinner is over. Evie and I are sprawled out on an armchair, all the others are either on a sofa or the floor. All the children are sleepy and its really cute. "Can you pass me my phone." I ask Evie. She hums a yes and reaches out for my phone on the table behind her. "Thanks." I smile and unlock my phone. Finding I have a missed call from the one and only Michael Clifford. Calling him back, because you know, it's polite. "Hey, what's up?" I ask as I walk into the kitchen, because I don't want disrupt anyone. "What did you do to Luke?" He dives straight in. "Elaborate." I tell him. "Ever since he's come back, he's been a smiley dork." He chuckles. "Isn't he anyway?" I laugh. "Yeah but even more so. Whatever you did, please do it again, because I like it. Luke's been an arse for past month, and it gets annoying after a while." He claims. Don't have to ask me to do it again. "I didn't do anything, but I'm glad he's happy." I reply. "I can hear your smirk from across the world." He tells me. "No you can't, I've got to go now, bye." I say. "Okay, but I know your hiding something, bye, speak to you later." He finishes off. "Believe what you want Mike." I giggle and end the call. "Who was that?" My mum asks. "Michael." I answer sitting back down. She nods and goes back to watching some soap opera. I go through the pictures on my phone of Dubai. "Look at this picture of Luke with a fish, and how proud he is." I tell Evie. When we went to the aquarium the first time and a fish seemed to be attracted to him (don't blame it), and he seemed so proud of himself. She laughs and goes back to her phone. Around an hour later, we are all saying our goodbyes. They're going to be coming back tomorrow or something though. "Bye!" I say as the door closes. "I'm going to bed because I'm tired as fuck." I tell anyone who's listening.

[grcy-blog1]

⌈ kim taehyung, cismale, he/him ⌋ hey, is it GRAY SIWOO that you’re looking for? you know, the TWENTY-ONE year old STUDENT. typically i see them hanging around ROAST CAFE so you could try there! i hear they’ve been in living in SAUGATUCK RESIDENTIAL for HIS WHOLE LIFE. gristol wouldn’t the same without them, right? anyway, whenever i see them they make me think of ripped jeans, colorful retro sunglasses, painted nails.

some quick info:

full name: gray siwoo

age: 21

date of birth: june 10

gender: cis male

pronouns: he/him

orientation: bisexual

occupation: student

allergies: peanut

zodiac sign: gemini

ok so gray was born and raised in gristol by his parents. his mom moved very young from korea to study abroad ( law more specifically ) and decided to stay when she met his father ( politics major ) and the two of them fell quickly and deeply at a very young age. however her family didn’t agree to it so she decided to cut them off even though she was very attached to them, so gray doesn’t know his family on his mother’s side at all. never spoke to them, don’t know what they look like, anything.

she didn’t come from a wealthy family but his father did!  once gray’s grandfather passed away his father being the only son took over their real estate brokerage business, making their lives way too easy. despite having her degree, his mom decide to dedicate herself to her family only and her kids, spoiling him rotten and giving literally everything he wants. gray could pretty much get away with everything if he pouts, which has helped him into his selfish and manipulative behaviors where he needs to get what he wants one way or another.

however, in order to shape him into a decent human he could get anything he wantedin his parents terms. he wasn’t handed everything, his dad was very rigid about that. instead he had to work  for it. do chores around the house, get good grades, that kinda thing. that really shaped him into a working man dhsuidfh ( even though most of the time his mom would let him off said chores )

TW DEATH

his mom was the sweet one in the house, but when gray was around 12 his mom fell sick and they discovered that she had leukemia and gray watched as his mom was no longer her best-self and never left her side to her last breath. his father was never a very loving type of father and often times he wanted to protect gray from seeing his mom that way but even at 12 years old gray was very mature and refused to let his father take away his time with his mom. the day she passed away was the day gray disconnected from his father completely, he blames him for her death and refuses to believe that now they can have a relationship when he spent so much time busy with work and away from them. gray still suffers a lot with her death but he never lets it show, not wanting to be vulnerable around others and doesn’t really want to worry his sister more than he already does.

he tries to not let the sadness and all the negative feelings take over him, figuring that his mom would want him to be kind and respectful to others like she was. he misses her dearly, she was his everything.

END OF TW

his dad has been the MAYOR of gristol for a couple years now, still a couple to go and will probably run again. gray thinks it’s hilarious that he can’t even take care of their house, how could he handle a whole town? but doesn’t say anything, in fact he takes advantage of his dad’s title to do whatever TF HE WANTS

his dad is also lowkey a homophobic and is that type who sees two guys kissing and public and cringes and comments about how its an indecency but wont do the same for the straight couples lol so gray prefers to hide that he kisses boys too from him but for everyone else he is out n proud ok 

at school gray was always kind of popular, he had his group of friends of course but he was naturally very social. he liked to talk and make people laugh and that continues through this day. he’s very sarcastic too which can be funny and because he’s a gemini he has those mood swings so pls be patient, sometimes he’ll be funny and cheerful and sometimes he’ll lock himself in his room for days without explanation

he was always very into music and was classic trained since he was a kid. that was very important to his parents. he can play piano, guitar, he can sing but he doesn’t think he can so he avoids the whole thing, loves playing though, especially the piano. catch him randomly playing just because at 6 am to wake up everyone because he’s THAT annoying lmao

his father demands a lot out of both him and expects him to be the perfect son and beCAUSE of that he goes against everything his dad wants. he wanted gray to attend politics school as well so he could be like him but gray decided to take arts instead, which he loves btw - he’s very artsy and loves to paint, draw, do some digital art and all that

he’s not a very big spender thankfully ( except w clothes tho ) , he likes to save his money even though thats never really lacked in his family.  he has plans of eventually leaving his father’s house and moving somewhere else away from him, the only reason why he hasn’t yet is hana. he can’t leave her. he’s simple, but likes to dress well and is obsessed with technology, he always has to have the newest phones, notebooks, watches, video games etc

very addicted to his phone and social media, instagram specially, in fact he likes to posts his art content and everything he does in there, updates his story all the goddamn time, i’d say he has a big following bc homeboy has a pretty face

a little bit of a hoe not going to lie, he’s very flirty and loves seeing his charm work on people, he tends to not let it go very far unless he feels very attracted to the person, he’s not the type to go fuck randoms and all that, he needs to have some type of connection before he gets intimate with someone

he can be a little hesitant to get close to people because he has major trust issues but once u get him talking there’s really no way to stop him, loves to roast and tease people just to be cute, he likes attention

a gentleman, he’s the real boyfriend material. he will open the door for you, carry your bags, carry yOU if you say you’re tired, go out of his way to make sure you’re comfortable, he’s your servant feel free to abuse it

however there are times where he snaps out of nowhere or just wants to be alone and is mean all suddenly but after will act like nothing has happened lmao

EXTREMELY affectionate, likes to touch hold hands hug kiss, he likes it when people play with his hair but all of that only applies to people he’s comfortable with, if you don’t know him well don’t touch him

[ anxiety tw ] he suffers w anxiety a lot due to his mom and stress and fighting w his father, sometimes he disappears and that’s when he’s having a crisis. he has panic attacks when its at its peak and he works out a lot and does yoga and all that as well as taking medication to keep it all at balance for his own sake [ end of anxiety tw ]

tries to eat healthy and watches what he eats a lot, he used to be chubby for a bit as a kid and that pushed him to work on himself which also makes him a little insecure about his body and his appearance. it’s still a little hard for him to believe that someone could be attracted to him and it’s also hard for him to just take a compliment without turning it into a joke.

neat freak, likes everything organized and clean and will freak out if you come over and mess up his room or go through his things

has terrible luck with relationships but never says no to love, tbh he’s a hopeless romantic and loves the chase. loves to gossip and he’s a bit shady when he doesn’t like someone ( which is not often this boy has a heart of gold ) fiughduf

omg i tried to keep this short and failed miserably

here’s some possible connections but i’m always up for anything

friends, ex-friends, enemies

someone who pretends to like him but actually talks shit about him behind his back

exes in good terms, exes in bad terms, there can be a few exes fjfgsdfhf

some sort of toxic relationship where they’re playing w each others feelings

flirtationship

someone he has a crush on but the other doesn’t or vice versa

a best friend, give him some bros pls

A CHILDHOOD best friend pls i love those

cousins, neighbors etc

party friends

iDK class mates

family friends

will they won’t they type thing

first kiss, first times etc

ENEMIES, people who just dislike him for any reason

someone who used to be friends w him but for whatever reason they have stopped talking ( perhaps a fight ) and now it’s either awkward as hell or they’re on their way to working things out

hook ups, friends w benefits etc

someone that likes fashion a lot too so they can go shopping together

work out buddy lets go

someone that likes his content on insta and knows him from there iDK

idk i’ll think of more later i swear

hit me up for plots love yall im excitED

[humanistauno]

A Journal by: Paola Marie Zuniga

December 16, 2019

A community blast!

Exactly 5:45 AM, I jumped out of my bed and prepared myself up. Today’s the day for our community visitation and survey. I will not deny that I kinda got excited with the thought of going out for a community immersion in a place I have never been visited.

All set! We had so much fun (or maybe only me) riding the trike to Brgy. Paraiso’s Sitio Salkan. I loved how the trike go up and down because of the rocky kind of road there – although, a part of me is kinda worried since I sat at the back part and I am undeniably heavy so, I was thinking about our tricycle getting stuck because of me. I was so excited about the ‘hiking part’ but it all disappeared when I felt my body getting heavier than it was used to be. I got tired easily and I can only think of two reasons why did that thing happened; first, because of how high the place is and second, that was the day I had my exercise ever since December started.

Everything went well, fortunately. We had interviewed 3 participants from different houses and we also had a chance to stay up on a hill and watch those eye-warming trees surrounding the whole place. We even took our lunch there and of course did some photoshoots. That is something we cannot forget, to be honest. Oh well, so much for this day. I am kinda tired with all the hiking and walking and running and stuffs and now, your little girl here needs her sleep. Ciao!

December 18, 2019

“Happy another-step-in-reaching-death Day slash legality day”

To be very honest, I wanted not to open my eyes. I mean, I know it’s my birthday and I have to be thankful for this another year being added but, who would like to celebrate their birthday without their mother? But oh well, my body betrayed me and it moved on its own plus I still need to open the boutique and do kinds of stuff there.

Tons of ‘Happy birthdays’ and such were received both personally and In social media. I am thankful for those people because I felt special with their birthday greetings and all. It made me soft and think, maybe it’s not that bad to celebrate my birthday after all, even with the absence of my mother. Also, speaking of which, my mom called me and I tried not to cry. I joked around while she cried on the other line. Ah, it hurts to hear your mom cry aye?

To be very honest, I cried while I was in the boutique – cleaning and arranging dresses. This was supposed to be a very happy and special day since I just turned 18 and here I am, doing work and just spend the entire day watching anime. Nothing special, really.

Ps: my churchmates and my tita prepared foods at the church. It lifted my spirit a little and I do appreciate the effort.

December 20, 2019

“Church thanksgiving and Christmas party!”

So far, this is the most awaited day for me. I am just ready to receive gifts and stuff from peeps in the church. Also, I am kinda excited about the prepared foods. The party started with a blast! We had the victory got talent and it was epic I must say! Every participant did a very good job and that includes my sister and two cousins who won first place in the said event.

After that segment, the most awaited part had arrived and it was EATING TIME! I only ate meat at that time and avoided rice hehe – I did not even touch the cake but then I kept on eating the fried chicken. I honestly can not stop myself at that time since I was craving for that and I know we need to feed up that craving and be happy for the rest of our lives with the help of these foods!

Receiving gifts for me is the highlight of the party- I received gifts from my Ates and Kuyas and also from my Ninongs and Ninangs. So for those who posted on Facebook about their godparents who were missing in action, I really can’t relate to your posts as of the moment (ooh, arrogance at its finest oho).

It was a great night actually, although, after the party, we went straight to the wake of my grandmother who passed away just right before my birthday. We stayed up late until 4 AM just to play lucky 9 and Bingo. I am kinda new to the card game (Lucky 9) and don’t even know a single thing so my cousin had to teach and guide me from time to time just for me to participate in the game. It was fun actually.

December 24, 2019

“A Happy Christmas”

We started this day with a dawn service in our church which for me is the best thing to do. I mean, it would be nice to start your day worshipping and praying to our creator. After the service, we had hot Choco and suman prepared by our pastor and we had fellowship with our co-members in church.

The moment we reached home from church, I found myself sleeping on my bed again. I woke up at 3PM actually and I took a bath immediately – after hours of sleeping and enjoying the dream I was having, back to the same routine again. Do some household chores then indulged myself to anime.

As the darkness finally took over, we started to become busy preparing food for the Christmas Eve. We don’t have much food for the celebration but being together, eating in one table is so much better than having lots of food but there’s no one to talk too. I kind of like being alone but I love being with my family.

Our house was filled with my music and shouts from my cousins the moment the clock struck 12. Exchanging of ‘Merry Christmas’ were heard inside our house as the 8 of us gathered around the table. We prayed and did a video call with my mom who was celebrating Christmas alone in her dorm in Cebu. ‘Twas sad honestly, seeing your mom on the screen of your phone, alone, while you’re with the rest of the family, eating together. I kind of felt sorry that she had to go somewhere far from us just for the sake of our future. But hey! It’s Christmas, we obviously does not want to break the joy we were having in our hearts, and so, we still laughed and joked around as we have our small celebration.

It was indeed, a happy Christmas.

December 29. 2019

“Mini reunion”

Every family gathering, I have always felt uninvited. Maybe because our family was known as one of the most problematic among the others and that made me feel uncomfortable every occasion.

Early in the morning as we prepare ourselves for church, my tita told me that we will be attending the reunion after church. At first, I said I am not going to show up in that gathering because I am pretty sure I will be left out, yeah – I am that negative. But after our church service, my cousins did convince me to attend the said reunion and even blackmailed me and left me no choice but attend the reunion.

The world seemed so dark to me at that time, sitting on the corner, frowning while I watch my titas and titos laugh and do crazy stuffs. At first, I really am not in the mood but when they called us out because we are about to eat, my mood changed a bit. Food can really change the world, yes. Well, I ate a lot. One thing I liked when we have gatherings is that the food being prepared are way too delicious that it made me forget how grumpy I am earlier. And since the food enlightened me up – after eating, I started to mingle with my younger cousins, they would kiss me in the cheek then we’ll sing along at the karaoke. It made me think that it wasn’t really a bad idea joining this mini reunion. The kids had their parlor games which was facilitated by me (lol) and it made me realize, kids can really wash away those negative cells you have in your body.

Guilt was slowly eating me at that time. How can I enjoy listening to their funny talks and even enjoy the presence of the kids where in the first place I was so negative about this gathering and even talked bad things about them inside my head. But here’s what I had realized like really.. I may talk bad about them but now, I will try my best to repay the goodness they were showing which I had failed to recognize through hard work in school and make them proud. Somehow, I want to be a good relative for them despite of how bad my thoughts about them are.

January 1, 2020

“2020”

To be honest, I did not started 2020 with a ‘good morning world’ since I did not sleep last night and I spent the whole night talking over the phone with my friend who was living in Makati. We talked about stuffs like our favorite anime series and of course, our cringey new year’s resolutions.

The whole first day of 2020 was not spent wisely. Body was still glued on the bed, eyes were still darted on the screen of the laptop. Productivity was nowhere to be found. I am pretty sure everyone wanted to be productive in the first day of 2020 but look who’s lazing around and let the whole world go crazy on its own as long as she get to finish her favorite anime, it’s me your girl.

6:15PM in the evening, we went to church for our midweek service. It’s kind of cool to start up 2020 with God’s words yeah? The whole preach was about reminders and of course it gave blessing to every listeners. Who wouldn’t be blessed by his words right?

The first day of 2020 ended up semi-good and semi-not. Semi-good because we went to church and heard wonderful messages and reminders and semi-not because I was not productive, I only fed up my anime desires and finished a whole series. Ugh.

January 3, 2020

“A man in green”

When boredom hits you, you sure do things just to make yourself busy and entertained. As for me, I’m clinging up unto omegle at times like that and I wasn’t really expecting to meet someone who just became my crush in just a snap.

So okay, here it goes. Every time I do omegle, my interest were always ‘bnha’ ‘mha’ and ‘anime’ and so I started the chat and words such as ‘you both like anime’ had appeared. The stranger did messaged me first with a hello with plenty of letter Os and was followed by ‘M20’. When I receive replies like that, I always end the conversation right away because I think they were just some horny dudes trying to get some nudes from girls they met in omegle but at that time, since I was bored and all, I replied ‘F18’ and did not end the conversation. Betraying my own rules, yeah the power of boredom and curiosity.

And so the guy once again replied and asked me about my favorite anime series. I did answered him that I have a lot of favorites but I then told him my favorites among the favorites which are One Punch Man and Boku no hero Academia. I was really expecting for him to freak out and end the conversation since many peeps in the anime community doesn’t like both series for its plot and both series are overrated animes but this guy replied “OMG YES SAME” and was followed by “I LIKE DEKU” “WHO’S YOUR BEST BOI” and such which I find funny so I tag along and replied him with ALL CAPS.

The whole duration of our conversation was fun and all, until we decided to exchange our instagram accounts. And there I saw a green eyed human with green hair. He is a good looking man who like rats and is obsessed with my hero Academia. While me, just a rotten potato who assumed he was a horny guy who asks nudes from girls. It was really fun and all since we are both born-again Christians and we are also both musicians in our church, he play the electric guitar in their fellowship while I play the bass guitar.

We were really having fun fanboying and fangirling over the series until he replied a.. “Let’s get married”

PS: I said yes and we are now happily living as anime couple in instagram.