#it's the light at the end of the tunnEl

[asteroidtroglodyte]

5 years ago, I was in Rehab.

10 years ago, I was watching my Potential and Opportunities dissolve and evaporate in an ocean of cheap gin and expensive whiskey.

But 5 years ago, I was in Rehab.

One of the exercises they had us perform was to imagine ourselves happy, 5 years in the future.

Many of us in that room had forgotten how to imagine nice things happening to them. A few snorted (well, I snorted), finding the notion that we’d even still be around in 5 years grimly humorous.

For about half of us, it was the last stop on the way down.

But I indulged the therapist. I was there, after all, because I did not want to die. So, I imagined myself, 5 years hence.

Happy.

It came to me all at once; an artistic remix on Norman Rockwell’s Freedom From Want, reframed with myself placing food at the table.

Sunday Dinner At My Place, I answered, when it came my turn to share my fantasy. I was asked what food I imagined eating.

It’s not the meal itself, I said, it’s the implications framed around it. Sunday Dinner At My Place means that I have a Place. It means that I have Family that will actually speak to me and friends who actually want to see me. It means money enough not just to feed myself but others too. It means having the time to spare to take the time preparing the meal.

A lot of nodding heads all around me. A struck chord. Many people with no Place, in that place. Nowhere that would lament their leaving.

5 years hence, as I lay down to sleep in my Home, with my Wife and my Son, surrounded by my Art and my Flowers, I reflect.

It was a long road. It was hard. We lost people. So many people. There were long days and long nights and hospital stays. Angry arguments with ghosts. I changed, in ways I never hoped for, or expected. Good ways, finally, for once. Slowly, against the backdrop of a world in chaos, I found my mind.

Sometimes, My Wife wondered aloud, what she did to deserve me. After some stumbling with my feelings, I eventually settled on an answer.

I’m a Rescue.

She gave me a Home.

And, so, I gave her a Family.

It seemed fair

This Sunday, my folks, which whom I have not had a shouting match in years, will come over for dinner. We will cook and eat together. My Friend became My Wife, and she took a piece of me and with it she made Our Son. There will be many hugs, and no violence. Good Things Happened.

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but you don’t know what the future holds.

don’t give up yet, ok?

It could get good, even.

[uh-ohspaghettio]

[fairydrowning]

in order to live a happy life, you must romanticize everything (and see a good therapist).

[grandquest]

Eyecatch redraw

[parisoonic]

artblock = heads facing right (whoops secret reupload as i made some small adjustments to sniper as he looked daft. him/soldier/engie are definitely the toughest mercs for me to draw)

[otaku553]

Procrastination doodles of sabo for the king sabo au :)

[buckycap]

idk you guys there’s something about orym previously being so willing to follow will into death and letting his grief eat him alive but now telling the matron that it’s pretty great living a lifetime while holding dorian’s gaze and smiling at him, orym and dorian both going through so much pain and grief in life yes but being alive also means experiencing and finding love and joy

[evydraws]

I couldn't stop making more and more of these small ink vignette illustrations for the art zine

[oldpotatoe]

just put down seven words for flwogb ch25. we are so back.

[roebeanstalk]

rent/food help request!

rent: 14/675

i need to get some food in the house and also get my landlord at least a partial payment towards may rent. i have about $14 right now, lol. ko-fi / cashapp / venmo

if anyone could help with *anything* i'd appreciate it. thank you!!!

[astronnova]

drawpile doodle

[infamous-empire]

Watching the real-time election results while doomscrolling politics tags is probably the most actively stressful thing I could conceivably do, and yet I’m doing it anyway

[thewhizzyhead]

like the whole warriors concept album does things to me but like I can't aptly describe the extreme chills felt in a light or something's "The light at the end of the tunnel's got nothing on you!"

[lyn-ne]

[ultramarinaa]

I just saw someone translate Martin’s name to polish so it’s Marcin Czarnoleski

I’m crying, this is adorable

[afloweroutofstone]

Life is hectic enough these days that my sleep schedule is now fully randomized. Slept from about 9:00 pm - 4:30 am last night and it was some of the best sleep I’ve had in a while