#it's so funny because two of them are a couple who have frequented my garden for over a year now

[auphelia]

There are four magpies in my garden, all screaming at me to throw them seeds. I forgot to restock seeds last time I went for groceries. I have nothing to give them.

[wndaswife]

saving room for dessert | wanda maximoff & fem!reader

Dinner with the new neighbours sets you on edge due to the repeated subtle passes made at your wife. You reestablish your ownership over Wanda in the kitchen while your guests wait for dessert in the dining room.

Word count: 6864

Tags | MDNI: smut, domestic fluff, humour, jealousy, possessiveness, reader has a penis, handjobs, brief thigh fucking, daddy kink, degradation, but way more praise, what is the word for almost getting caught fucking in the room beside the dinner guests??, sub!wanda maximoff

A/N: the corny alliteration of vision and virginia's name was not my doing it is based on his comic series ndskjfnkjfn

The town of Westview was a rather quiet one, though both you and your wife really loved the neighbourhood community, for it was friendly and close-knit. When you first moved into Westview together, it was because Wanda’s job had relocated her to somewhere further than where you had previously lived, and close to the charming town that was alike to the kind you had always talked about living in together.

Both of you were delighted to find that the people of Westview were welcoming and kind, and that there were frequently tourists that made the small town buzz with life, for Westview’s small-town charm along with its infamous preservation of its older architecture and landscape was a sight that many of those from the more bustling areas of New Jersey enjoyed visiting.

Though Westview had a tightly-knit community and a steady flow of cheerful tourists, it was rather uncommon for the small town to get new people moving in, so when one of the new neighbours ended up working alongside Wanda, the two of you were rather eager to get to know them — a long-time married couple with two children who’d graduated from college and were now living elsewhere.

After about two weeks of scheduling between the four of you, dinner that had long been spoken about was finally happening at yours and Wanda’s. 

You were looking forward to it, for Wanda spoke quite highly of the wife, who she described as an extremely kind and funny woman. You had spoken with her a few times too, but only by chance like under casual circumstances when you were bringing in groceries with Wanda and she was out gardening. 

Additionally, Virginia, the wife, lived in Russia until she was eight, and though Wanda was Sokovian, the two were able to initially enjoy discussing their Slavic similarities in culture and dialect until they became closer, chatting casually about things from their spouses to Westview. Eventually, conversation led up to Wanda inviting Virginia and her husband, Vision, over for dinner. 

You were looking forward to it, and though Wanda was looking forward to dinner with the neighbours too, she also enjoyed hosting and cooking, and so the kitchen was busy and smelling wonderfully for the last little while as you cooked together. 

Mostly, it was Wanda who took the lead with cooking, but since being married, her talents had rubbed off on you; you could now dice onions at perhaps two-thirds of the speed she could, and Wanda also always says you’re good at cleaning up after her while she cooks.

But also, you really just loved doing things like this with her, when you could just talk about anything, just the two of you, while doing things you could only dream about when the two of you were still only dating, living in a place together that you could also only dream about back then. 

You wrapped your arm around your wife’s waist once she slid the potato dauphinoise into the oven and shut it, pulling her into your body and kissing her forehead. “I love you,” you uttered into her warm skin. 

She held your chin in her hand and angled your face to hers so she was able to kiss your lips. “I love you too,” she replied, smiling sweetly at you. 

Your guests were five minutes early, perhaps to make a good impression, for they could have been exactly on time if they so preferred seeing as though they lived right next door. 

It was you who opened the door as Wanda was finishing up a few things in the kitchen, ensuring the cheesecake you had made earlier was comfortably sitting in the fridge waiting until it was time to serve dessert.

Also, she thought it’d be a good impression for you to greet them first, since you’d yet to meet either of them officially.

Cheesecake was actually your signature greatest achievement in the kitchen aside from nearly — not nearly at all, really, but you like to boast — keeping up Wanda’s onion-chopping. You’d taken the cheesecake recipe from a cookbook, and it was Wanda who adjusted most of the measurements and changed some of the ingredients, but it was you who could make it perfectly.

Well, Wanda could make it perfectly too, and probably better, but she never tried; she liked the way you made it, and gave you recipe credit though it was her who really reconstructed it to be what it tasted like now. But she always says that it was you who found the original recipe, at the end of the day.

Not that any of that would matter to your guests, and maybe it might be a story told over dinner if the topic came up, but it mattered plenty to you and Wanda; you wanted to concoct a special dinner together, preparing dishes with special meaning. Though some of said meanings were not as profound in their history as the cheesecake’s, like how Wanda lathered the dinner rolls in butter a second time halfway through because you liked when the top of the rolls weren’t completely dry by the time they were finished baking.

In any case, the intention was to host a dinner that was friendly and warm, and so the dinner spread was selected with intention.

“Hi,” you greeted with a smile, waving a bit awkwardly for no reason at all before ushering them into the foyer and closing the front door behind them. “You must be Virginia — I’ve heard lots about you from Wanda.”

The woman, slightly taller than you and with smooth, soft looking dark hair that ended at the mid-way point of her slender neck, beamed at you as she stepped into the house, her husband following behind her. She took your hand with both of hers, warm fingers caressing your hand gently. “And you must be Y/N. I’ve also heard quite a bit about you from Wanda,” she said, eyes crinkling at their edges as she smiled.

She gestured to her husband, a clean-shaved blonde man with aviators, slightly shorter than his wife but still a bit taller than you. “This is my husband, Vision,” she introduced. “I don’t believe even Wanda’s yet met his acquaintance.”

It was when Vision shifted the lidded ceramic bowl into his other hand to free one in order to shake your hand that you realised he was carrying something. You shook his hand with a friendly smile. “It’s nice to meet you, Y/N,” he said cordially and with a smile.

“Virginia!” Wanda cheerfully greeted as she walked into the foyer, hair fixed up and now without her cooking apron on. They exchanged a hug and Virginia kissed her cheek before introducing Wanda to her husband.

“Thank you for having us,” Virginia said appreciatively. “We’re both thrilled to finally get to know both of you better.”

Wanda replied, sharing a tenderness with Virginia within their met eyes, “You’re very welcome. Y/N and I have been looking forward to tonight all week.”

“Oh,” you interjected softly, realising Vision was still holding his ceramic bowl. “I’m so sorry, let me take this into the dining room for you.”

“In fact, I’ll also take the both of you into the dining room too,” Wanda added lightheartedly. “Let’s get out of the foyer. You can set your shoes down anywhere by the door, and the coat rack’s right here.”

Once wine had been poured and everyone’s plates were served the dinner you and Wanda had made together — pomegranate-brined chicken with white balsamic charred peach, potato dauphinoise, and a medley of some vegetables — you each sat at the dining room table, enjoying your dinner together.

There was conversation about how wonderfully everything tasted, and you were sure to credit Wanda with taking charge in the kitchen, allowing her to talk a little bit about how she prepared the meal and delving into details the couple asked her about, like how she had made the potato dauphinoise so creamy. 

You began to truly enjoy their company for how much they were complimenting your wife.

Until there was Vision’s, You’re a gorgeous woman who can put together an equally as gorgeous dinner spread — Y/N’s hit the jackpot.

“Dinner couldn’t have been done without Y/N,” Wanda assured and then looked at you with a proud smile mostly meant for your eyes, but you weren’t paying as much attention to her as you were scrutinising Vision’s body language after his comment.

It wasn’t… inherently malicious.

But there was something implicative in his wording that made you slightly sceptical of him.

Perhaps in an attempt to… Well, you actually weren’t entirely sure what Virginia was attempting to do when she lightly corrected, “Both Y/N and Wanda have hit the jackpot finding each other. You two seem so perfect for each other. Not to mention, if I might be so blunt, you’re a rather attractive couple.”

Wanda laughed, but in the way she regarded Virginia’s expression for just an additional moment before looking back down to her plate to respond with something humble and bashful, you knew she was also curious about the other couple’s compliments.

“I moved the wine around!” you tried, intentionally poorly, to call after Wanda when conversation came around to discussing the different wines you had, resulting in Wanda leaving to go get one the opposite couple loved. “Sorry, if you’ll excuse me, I don’t believe I’ve yet told her how I reorganised down there.”

As you headed down the hallway, you inhaled and exhaled thoroughly to untie the uneasy kink in your stomach, sure to keep your shoulders still so your tenseness wasn’t obvious to your guests who could still see your back until you headed downstairs to where the wine was kept, for their comments hadn’t stopped since the first time.

Wanda looked over her shoulder at you when you descended the stairs and she straightened from looking around at the selection. “Baby, do we still have the Pinot Grigio they were asking about?” she asked, hands on her hips as she leaned back a bit and ran her eyes over the selection on the wall in front of her.

“Are they swingers or something?” you asked as you approached, placing a hand atop Wanda’s hand on her hip as you reached around her and took the white from the wall to her left.

“Oh, you moved them,” Wanda noted, thanking you when you handed it to her. 

You stood beside her in front of the wine rack and repeated your question, looking up at the closed basement door before asking again. “Are they swingers?”

“What?” Wanda looked up from surveying the wine, looking confused. “What are swingers?” 

Clarifying, you replied, “Couples who sleep with other couples.”

“Them?” she asked incredulously and laughed. You took that as a ‘no,’ then looked over at the basement door curiously as if you could see them through it, ruminating over their comments. Then Wanda was silent and unmoving and you looked at her as she was tapping her fingers against the glass of wine, seemingly in deep thought of her own. “Well… Come to think of it…”

“Wanda!” you hissed. “You invited swingers over to our place for dinner!”

“I didn’t know!” she answered. “I just thought… Virginia talks about her sex life often and I suppose there are some times that she’s alluded to… to swinging about with other couples—”

“It sounds weird when you use that term like that — just say sleeping with,” you interrupted.

Your wife gave you a look and you cracked a tiny amused smile before she continued. “Anyway, yes, I suppose they’re swingers. I didn’t know!”

With your arms crossed, you tapped your fingers against your upper arm in thought, and Wanda supposed you were thinking of how to converse with them now that you both knew they were swingers. But instead you asked hesitantly, meeting Wanda’s eyes, “Are you… interested in that?”

Wanda scoffed. “Y/N, no. Don’t be ridiculous,” she replied. You surveyed her face for a moment longer and she fully turned her body to face you. “You really think I want to sleep with other couples?”

“No, I don’t, but we’ve never had the conversation before, so it’s possible that you’ve had it on your mind before, even in passing.”

She assured, “I do not want to sleep with anyone else but you.” It was almost funny to hear those words come out of her if you thought about it with no context, but context given, it was really a relief to you. “I’m entirely satisfied with only us, and the thought of being with anyone else disturbs me greatly. I’m not offended that you asked just to make sure, but the idea of being with another couple, or anyone but you, has never been anything that I’ve entertained. Y/N, I didn’t even know what swinging was until a moment ago.”

“Okay?” she checked in, her voice soft, letting her other hand with the wine hang by her hip while she stepped towards you and cupped your cheek with a warm hand. “I really didn’t know — and not even subconsciously, if you’re thinking that.”

“Okay,” you confirmed and smiled at her, causing Wanda to smile at you in response. She leaned forward and kissed you.

When she pulled away, she met your eyes and your chest warmed when Wanda’s smile crinkled the sides of her eyes. Her thumb rubbed against your chin adoringly. “I’m unsure how we ought to go about signalling a lack of interest in having sex with them,” she told you.

“Just a lack of reciprocation, maybe?” you suggested, and at that, you perked up at the recollection of their commentary that you now knew was flirtatious. “Wanda, if Vision calls you gorgeous one more time, I’ll fuck you over the dining table monogamously in front of them — I’m serious. It’s driving me crazy. He’s right, but to know they’re both just thinking of how much more gorgeous you’d be if we were all having sex is rather startling.”

It wasn’t that they weren’t making subtle passes at you too, but since Wanda was far more communicative and talkative, it was natural that their efforts to become closer circulated your wife far more than it did you.

Wanda laughed and pushed at your shoulder playfully, her head thrown back slightly. “You’re such a freak,” she said. She took your hand and you headed out of the basement together. “It’s okay. Now that we’ve spoken about it together, I’m sure it’ll be much less awkward since we know they’re swingers. It likely won’t be a problem until they bring it up, and then we can clarify that we’re not interested.”

The plan was more than simple, but it failed to consider how agitated you were becoming, little comments now seeming much larger now that their intentions were clarified between you and your wife. 

It was things from Virginia noting how you seemed to be the one to ‘take charge’ in the marriage, to asking outright how often the two of you had sex, about children and the possibility of them, and plenty of other things that were likely of no consequence but seemed irritating to you because you were simply irritated. 

Mostly, it was Virginia’s comments that were permitted to be slightly more vulgar as it was she who asked about yours and Wanda’s sex life, for she was now more than only work friends with your wife, and she’d shared much about her own intimate tendencies with Vision before. 

The conversations about sex weren’t crude, and mostly they were merely jokes, but knowing the intentionality behind them now made them far more than that.

But it was about more than references to sex; there were comments made about how both you and Wanda were such a perfect couple, how well you worked together and how kind you were — observations upon observations about how you and Wanda were within your marriage.

It seemed they had standards, at least.

And truly, Virginia and Vision were kind people and you would thoroughly enjoy having them as neighbours as soon as it was made clear that you and Wanda weren’t interested in sleeping with them.

What irritated you wasn’t necessarily all about them and their commentary, for they knew not that you and Wanda weren’t interested, and anyways, if Virginia had been alluding to being a swinger along with her husband on several occasions, this dinner might very well be interpreted by them as interest.

So you didn’t necessarily dislike them.

It was all true that you and Wanda made a wonderful pair and that Wanda was gentle and so generous, and that she was beautiful and all the things that had been said about her tonight. 

She was very funny too when she wanted to be, and had great taste in movies and all her clothes always sat so well on her shoulders, and her hair was always so soft and the crook of her neck was always very warm, and her fingers were gentle and curious when she had them wrapped around you, and she was so delicate when she slept, and her elbows were a nice shape, though you don’t think you ever told her what you thought about her elbows — all this Virginia and Vision didn’t know, but for whatever reason, you thought so much about it all.

And for another inexplicable reason, it was rather related to how irritated you were.

“Y/N and I have been married for two and a half-ish years now,” Wanda said in response to a question you weren’t listening to, placing her hand on your thigh. You looked over at her and she smiled at you sweetly. 

You’d only said a few things in the last few minutes, little comments and visible reactions to show that you were engaged in the conversation, but nothing majorly contributory. You looked to the side in brief thought then said, “Two years and… seven months.” 

With a second more to think, you also added, “Three days.”

Wanda thought that was funny, but also sweet, and her smile widened, perking up her ears slightly as her smile grew. She squeezed your knee and pulled her hand away to take a sip of wine. “Indeed — two years, eight months, and three days.”

“If we feel so inclined to place trust in my math,” you joked modestly.

You watched as Wanda conversed further with your guests, watching the way she laughed and how she looked over at you often to see your reactions to things or to just make eye contact with you. Specifically, you liked when she looked at you while she was laughing to see if you were also laughing, to share in that joy with you.

As you watched your wife between sips of wine, there was a rupture of adrenaline that came over you. All that you’d been thinking of about Wanda wasn’t some abstract concept about some idea of Wanda — they were all about the woman you loved, the woman who loved you, the woman you were married to.

The woman who was yours, and who’d only ever be yours, as you were hers.

The thought warmed you and made you feel delighted, but your cheeks felt warm and the wine warmed your throat and chest in such a pleasant way, and suddenly, you needed Wanda then and there like you knew you had her.

“Are we all ready for dessert?” Wanda asked, looking around at the table to see everyone’s plates empty with their silverware to the side. 

When Vision confirmed for both himself and Virginia, Wanda said, “Y/N’s made a wonderful cheesecake for the occasion. She can be quite the chef.” Her praise made you feel a bit bashful and you smiled at her gratefully.

Virginia expressed excitement for dessert while you and Wanda collected the empty plates to bring to the kitchen, letting them know it’d be a few minutes.

You followed behind Wanda as she headed down the hallway and into the kitchen. Dishes were thoroughly emptied and rinsed before being placed into the sink while Wanda carefully took the cheesecake out of the fridge.

“Can you take this?” she asked, holding the cake out to you. You took it from her and placed it on the island counter at the centre of the kitchen. “I think I’ll slice some fresh fruit and arrange it nicely on top. I didn’t want to do it before it was served or it wouldn’t be fresh.”

You were listening, but not quite taking in what she was saying. You watched her closely as she took out some fruits and honey from the fridge and brought it to the counter before taking out the cutting board. She tucked loose hair behind her ears and pushed her sleeves up.

Her neck was exposed and you felt the urge to smell her perfume, feel the warmth of her skin against the tip of your nose.

You stepped forward so your pelvis was pressed against her hip, an arm wrapped around her waist as you pulled her close and ducked your head beyond the strands of her hair, burying your nose in her neck. She tipped her head to the side, allowing you room to kiss up her neck.

You felt the vibrations of her laugh against your lips.

“What are you doing?” she asked.

“I need you,” you answered briefly, using your other hand to tug her sleeve down slightly and expose some of her shoulder so you could kiss there too. There was no response from her aside from a soft hum, and you knew it had been on her mind too. “Don’t tell me you haven’t been thinking about it; all their implications have made me think of you all night.”

“And that constitutes you needing me now?” she asked, turning her head to look down at your face along the slope of your nose and forehead seeing as your face was still half-buried within the crook of her neck. “I would have thought you’d be too busy brooding.”

She was trying half-heartedly to taper your desire, but the soft inflection in her voice told you she’d certainly felt the same thrum you’d been feeling too.

“I was busy with far more important things.” You wrapped your fingers around her wrist carefully and led her hand down to between your hips, and in spite of her hesitation, Wanda’s fingers wrapped delicately around you through your pants. Your hips immediately bucked into her hand.

Wanda inhaled sharply then sighed at the feeling of you. “Y/N…” Your name trembled on her lips. You watched as she swallowed, eyes flickering up at the hallway in front of you both. Her jaw tensed and she looked back down, fingers twitching as she internally fought against her most rational objections.

She bit the inside of her cheek before her hand moved, unbuttoning your pants then unzipping. She met your eyes, her hand pausing momentarily, perhaps wishing you might change your mind suddenly and stop her before she was unable to stop herself. But you said nothing, only meeting her eyes with stubborn conviction.

Your gaze made her cheeks flush a soft pink and Wanda shifted in her spot, pushing her own hips against the edge of the island counter, no doubt feeling her own desire growing. She looked down and tucked her hand past the waistband of your underwear, pulling it down along with your pants until your cock was free.

“I’ve been thinking about having your lips around my cock,” you whispered, your lips brushing against the lobe of her ear. “About the way you groan when I pull out just enough so you can taste the way you make me feel against your tongue before I fuck myself down your throat. I thought about how beautiful your pussy looks when I lay you down and spread your cunt open. I thought about you.”

Her breathing became heavy at the sight of your arousal, seeing how you twitched as you spoke about her. Her hand wrapped around you, her thumb brushing gently over your sensitive tip and eliciting a soft grunt from you.

“Fuck, Wanda,” you cursed from beyond clenched teeth. Your hips twitched forward into her hand and Wanda didn’t wait a moment before giving you the friction you wanted, her hand jerking around you and repressing a moan of her own as she felt you throb and twitch in the warm confines of her palm.

Your arm wrapped around her waist advanced upwards, pulling up some of her shirt and exposing some of her lower stomach as your hand groped at Wanda’s clothed breast.

She let out a soft moan and you watched as she squeezed her thighs together and further pressed her pelvis into the kitchen counter in desperation. Her hand gained speed, ensuring to graze around your tip each time her hand continued its rhythm around you. Her head rested on your shoulder as she watched the way she touched you, watched the way you let her touch you, her breaths shaky as she felt her own desire climb.

But how could you deny your wife mutual pleasure?

You moved the cutting board to the side and Wanda watched as you readjusted things. 

“Y/N, don’t,” she protested quietly. “We can’t.”

Ignoring her, you moved from her side, her hand releasing from around you as you placed your hands on her hips and pressed her against the counter. 

You unbuttoned her pants and watched over Wanda’s shoulder as she watched your hands, her chest rising and falling, gripping the edge of the counter. She was so warm against your body and her perfume smelled so nice. 

You pulled her pants down along with her underwear, allowing you to press your cock against her perfect ass. 

Wanda exhaled a deep, trembling sigh and she leaned forward against the counter. “Y/N,” she weakly protested again, reaching back and trying to swat your hand away. 

Impatient about wanting her to give up her hesitation, you pulled her pants down further below her ass and slotted yourself between her thighs, parting her wet cunt with your dick and brushing your tip against her clit. 

Her head fell back against your shoulder and you felt her thighs squeeze together ever so slightly, nudging you up against her clit. 

“We can’t?” you asked. 

“They’ll…” Wanda braced herself again and straightened her back, knuckles turning white as she pressed the pads of her fingers into the underside of the counter. “They’re in the other room. We’d have to…”

“Be quick?”

She nodded. 

“I can be quick,” you told her. You kissed the corner of her jaw, the hollow part behind her earlobe. “You know I can be quick.”

Your hand slid down her stomach, the heel of your hand brushing against the space between her hips before your fingers found her clit. Carefully, you brushed them against her, feeling the way she twitched her ass back against you, subtly rubbing herself against your cock that was still throbbing between her thighs. 

“Beg me to fuck you.”

Wanda looked over her shoulder at you. “What?” she asked. “I thought you wanted–”

“But you were so adamant that we couldn’t. Now, I’m not so convinced myself,” you said. “You’ll have to beg me.”

“Y/N, please,” she whispered impatiently. 

You gave a quick pinch to her clit and Wanda repressed a yelp as her body jolted against yours. “That’s not how you beg, baby.”

Wanda urged, “We don’t have time.”

“Make time.”

Impatient, you spanked Wanda’s ass lightly and took a handful of the soft flesh, eliciting a sharp inhale from your wife before she sighed out, “Oh, Y/N…”

She reached back, parting from your hips to make enough room for her hand. She wrapped her hand around your cock and stroked it slowly, bending herself over the counter and presenting herself to you obediently. 

“Please, daddy,” she begged. “I want you inside me. I want… I want you. Please. I need you.”

You watched as her desperate hand continued to pleasure you, watched as her back arched as she bent over the counter. You pushed her shirt up her back, eyes running up the delicate curve of her spine and feeling with your palm the smoothness of her soft skin. 

“Are you… Are you going to?” Wanda asked nervously, fully aware of the fact that you had every liberty to pull away and forget all about wanting to fuck her right there and then. She wasn’t exactly meeting your eyes, not that she could at the angle she was looking back over her shoulder at you, but she wasn’t exactly trying to either, for the possibility of you leaving her all desperate and unfucked was all too real.

You hummed in what sounded like consideration, but really, you were just running your eyes down the curve of Wanda’s lower back and the perfect swells of her ass, watching the way she continued to hesitantly stroke you, desperate to please and desperate to have you inside of her.

“How could I deny you, Wanda?” you finally answered, and you saw your wife flush from beyond her mess of loose strands, looking away and at the hallway ahead that led to the dining room. 

“We really have to be quick,” she reminded, letting go of you but not without brushing her thumb over your tip again. 

A hand came to her upper back and flattened her against the kitchen counter, a soft grunt leaving Wanda as was pressed down against the marble. “You really overestimate yourself if you really think it’ll take very long to get you to come,” you mocked, hands hooking under her hips and around her upper thighs, arching her back further and sticking her ass up. 

At the sight of her cunt, you groaned and parted her sticky mess with your thumb and middle finger, brushing your index finger down across her clit. You ran your thumb across her hole, dipping ever so carefully into her before removing your hand to position yourself against her opening.

“I couldn’t help but notice,” you said, “how embarrassed and shy you were every time they mentioned sex or asked about our sex life. Trust me, there were dozens of other things running through my head, but one in particular.”

Wanda gripped at the edge of the counter, taking in a breath as she felt you prod at her opening with your tip, dipping in just enough for her to feel the stretch of your cock sliding into her. “What… What was it?” she asked quietly.

“I wondered why you felt such an urge to act so embarrassed talking about sex when you know what a fucking slut you are,” you gritted out before your hands tightened around her thighs below her hips and pulled her ass back against you so your cock slid into her with a single thrust. 

You leaned forward to grunt against her shoulder, muffling your noises and letting your wife know how good she felt. “Fuck, you feel so fucking good around my dick, angel,” you groaned. “Sweet innocent girls wouldn’t be able to take cock like this, Wanda. You put up a front when you’re with them, but you know how much you love getting your pussy fucked raw by daddy. Isn’t that right?”

Wanda shut her eyes tightly, her moans and yelps being only partially-swallowed as she tried to keep them from escaping past her lips, though it become increasingly difficult as you began thrusting forward, trapping her between the kitchen counter and your hips and forcing her to withstand the entire impact of your brutal fucking.

“Th-That’s right…” she conceded.

“I know it is,” you agreed. “I know it is, because it’s fucking filthy. You’re a filthy slut, baby. You can hear it, can’t you?” You reached down to rub your fingers against your wife’s clit. “You can feel how much it turns you on that you’re all daddy’s, that daddy can fuck you whenever she wants because she owns you.”

Your forehead laid against her shoulder and Wanda reached up to cradle the back of your head with her hand, interlacing her fingers with your hair.

“That’s right. Fucking take it,” you grunted into her ear, feeling yourself growing closer each time Wanda’s walls squeezed around you, listening to her delicate high-pitched yelps every time you pinched her clit or thrusted into her so hard her ass stung with the way your skin slapped against hers. 

Her hips were beginning to become sore with the way they were pressed against the edge of the counter.

“Do any of you need help in there?” Virginia called from the dining room, audibly beginning to head down the hallway to the kitchen. 

“A-Ah, no!” Wanda called back, her attempts at repressing her moans making her response come out slightly more aggressive than she’d wished. “Please don’t! We’re almost finished. Just…” Her head hung as she quickly ran out of excuses, but she couldn’t bring herself to push you away — not when she was so, so close.

Not when you felt this good inside of her, holding her so close against you.

You felt so good with your arms around her.

You took a handful of Wanda’s ass as you shoved her further down against the counter so she was being soundlessly fucked from behind as her hair gradually became undone, her shirt riding up to expose that beautiful curve of her spine that you loved. 

“Wanda’s a bit of a perfectionist with decorating the cake,” you added, digging your nails into her malleable flesh and watching as smooth ivory tinted into a flushed red. “She wants it to be a surprise!”

“I promise we’re… we’re nearly finished!” Wanda called back, slightly breathless, before quickly burying her face into her arms and muffling herself.

Virginia gave in, saying something about having the both of you promise not to work too hard because both she and Vision would love the cake anyways. But neither of you paid much attention once you heard her walking back down to the dining room.

“You feel so good inside of me, daddy,” Wanda whimpered into her arms. “Please come inside. I want to feel you. I wanna feel how warm you are.”

Being degraded always turned Wanda on, but it was being praised that made her come; you loved how your wife was so sensitive to sweet things like that.

So you lifted her from the counter with your arm wrapped around her waist so her arms were taut with her hands gripping the edge of the counter again. From here, you were pressed against her with access to whisper into her ear.

“You’ve been so good for me, haven’t you, sweetheart?” you complimented against her cheek, pressing a kiss there and running your hand beneath the confines of her shirt. “All nervous and hesitant to let daddy make you feel good at first, but you knew better later, didn’t you? You know that I know what’s best for you, honey.”

Wanda nodded fervently. “Yes, I…”

Your hand pulled Wanda’s bra to the side and you kneaded her breast with your hand, feeling the way her nipple hardened against your palm before moving to the other and pinching her other nipple between your thumb and forefinger. “Oh, I know,” you cooed when she leaned back against you with a prolonged, quiet moan. “My princess, you’re such a good girl.”

“Why don’t you listen to what a good girl you are, hm?” you asked, moving both your hands down to grip her hips again and pulling her against you. You watched in detail as you pulled out of her, her glistening pussy wrapped around your cock, before you thrusted back in, your obedient wife taking every inch. 

Both of you listened to how her cunt sounded around your dick, her slick coating you as you throbbed inside of her, her tight walls squeezing you in just the right way, feeling the way the pressure from her walls gripped around your tip when you pulled out at just the right length.

“Fuck, baby, your pussy feels so good,” you groaned, leaning back so you could watch the way her ass looked when you rutted your hips against her. Unable to help yourself in spite of the noise you knew it might make, you delivered a spank to the side of Wanda’s ass. 

You then wrapped your arm around Wanda’s waist again, your other hand moving up to cup the side of her cheek and turn her head around so you could kiss her lips. “Come on, angel, fuck yourself on daddy’s cock. Let me see how badly you wanna come on my dick.”

Wanda obediently began moving, arching her back to allow herself leverage to fuck herself back against you, listening to how her ass slapped back against your hips.

“That’s good, baby. You’re so beautiful,” you breathed out against her neck, kissing the warm expanse as you listened to Wanda whimper and try to hold herself together until you gave her permission to come. Your hand groped her breast again. “You’re so needy for daddy’s cock, hm? You’re making such a fucking mess, Wanda.”

“Y/N…” Wanda whispered, her arm reaching back to grab at the edge of your shirt. “Please let me come. Please.” You kept your chest pressed against her upper back, allowing her to meet your eyes when she turned her head to plead.

“Come all over daddy’s cock, baby, come on,” you permitted. “I love to see you all desperate for me. Let me see you come, Wanda.”

Wanda ground her ass back against your hips, burying your cock deep within her pussy as she came around you, walls gripping at your twitching cock. You felt her pulsate around you as she grasped desperately behind her, searching for your hand. 

You interlaced your fingers with hers and kissed her lips as you came to your own hilt, emptying yourself inside of her and letting her feel your warm cum fill her up to the brim until you could feel yourself dripping out from the sides of her cunt.

Weakly, you continued thrusting into her, fucking your cum deep inside of her as Wanda whimpered, sensitive and still pulsing around you as she felt your sticky warmth shoot up inside of her. 

“Oh… I love when you come inside of me, Y/N,” she breathed out, satisfied and tired as she let go of your hand and used both to balance herself against the counter as she slumped forward.

You grinned at her and kissed the back of her neck as you pulled her underwear up first, giving her sensitive cunt a quick swipe through her panties, telling her to keep your cum in for as long as she could. Then you did her pants back up and did the same for yourself.

The rest of the cheesecake decorating went relatively fast after Wanda quickly cleaned herself up in her kitchen window reflection. 

Actually, neither of you had ever decorated a cheesecake so fast considering you decided to go a bit overboard with some whipped cream to make up for how long you both took — it would’ve made far more sense to come out with a more intricately decorated cake. It was a decently-sized cake, just enough for four people to enjoy, so it didn’t take as long as it would’ve if it were sized regularly.

“Oh, we were so worried you might’ve needed help with the dessert,” Virginia said the moment the both of you stepped into the dining room, Wanda with the cake in hand and you with the plates and silverware.

“We’re so sorry,” Wanda apologised. “One of us set the cake lopsided in the fridge and it came out a bit kooky, so we had to reshape it and all. And then the organising of the fruit and—” She waved her hand dismissively as she set the cake down. “Well, it’s all finished now.”

You set the plates down for everyone along with their respective knives and forks. “We hope you didn’t have to wait too long,” you told them apologetically.

Aside from how your initial impression as a couple spiked Virginia and Vision’s interest in wanting to sleep with both you and Wanda, the meal thus far must’ve paid off, for they really didn’t seem irritated at all after waiting for dessert. 

And they did end up enjoying the cake too.

Except for Wanda, however, who seemed to be rather distracted with something else. You watched as she kept readjusting herself in her seat, her thighs squeezing together every so often and taking sips of her wine just to fidget with the handle of the glass.

You were rather eager to fuck your wife in the bedroom too after dinner, but before that, to see how much of your cum had leaked out of her.

By the looks of it, she had failed to hold much of it in.

[xiaosonlybeloved]

Forever Together~ Kaeya

featuring:- Kaeya tags:-fluff, a teeny bit of angst if you squint, semi-modern au(?), soulmate au where you get a golden band on your 18th birthday which changes into a silver bracelet like thingy when you properly meet your soulmate, kaeya calls you princess once a/n:- this is my entry for the summer santa event by @solarisfortuneia , thanks for letting me take part and sorry for being so late! this one is dedicated to @satoruxx i hope both you and mika like this :)

word count:- 1.3k

masterlist

You grow more excited as the clock nears midnight. “Only five more minutes, Kaeya!” You exclaim, tugging his hand and pointing at the clock. Your childhood best friend shakes his head, amused at your unusual excitement. “You’re really that excited just for your soulmate band? How funny. I mean, you’ve always been a soft romantic, so I’m not really surprised.” He chuckled, the sound filling your room. Both of you glance towards the golden band already present on Kaeya’s wrist, showing that he hadn’t met his soulmate yet. It had appeared, as it always does for everyone, on his 18th birthday. 

None of you said it, none of you knew the other was thinking the same thing. But both of you wondered, if… If you two could possibly be each other’s soulmates.

Both of you had harboured feelings for each other since you were children. It was cute at first. But then as time passed, as you two started to notice each other more, grow up side by side, saw all sides of each other, that harmless puppy love started growing into ‘small’ crushes, even as you two were content to remain best friends. Best friends who were practically attached at the hip, frequently did sleepovers and study sessions, hung out a lot, and always took advantage of the couples discount system. Deep down, both of you wondered if you could ever be more.

The chance of Kaeya being your soulmate was a one in a thousand. So, what harm did it do to imagine the what-ifs of a nearly impossible situation, you both thought, allowing your minds to wander.

The thought of being Kaeya’s soulmate excited you. But it scared Kaeya. 

It wouldn’t be easy to love you officially. It’s not because he couldn’t or didn’t want to. He had no idea what the future would bring, but for now, he really did love you, the way you did. But he was terrified what a relationship would bring, not just to you, but to any possible partner of his, which is why he wanted to avoid meeting his soulmate. He wasn’t sure if he’d be able to maintain a relationship with his ways. And he was scared of his past.

Kaeya and his dad had fled from their home nation, Khaenriah, when it was on the brink of utter ruin because of the wars that had ravaged the world. Fled to Mondstadt, a stable country with abundant beauty, one that had already risen up after the war. There, his father had disappeared, leaving him with a caring adoptive family. 

It had been hard for him to adjust and adapt to this new life, especially since he had just been a mere child when all this happened. And he wouldn’t have been able to, if not for you.

You were his neighbour- still are, in fact. He remembered when he’d timidly ventured out into the gardens of his new house a few days after his life had been uprooted. You had noticed him wandering alone very quickly from your own garden, tugging at your mom’s hand to point at him. He’d been scared then, but then you ran ever to him, eyes sparkling, asking him if he was new here, and if he wanted to play with them, adding that their family were very good friends with his new family.

That was the beginning of their friendship, the one that had led them here, staring at the clock at night, waiting for it to strike twelve. And Kaeya was scared, scared because he’d heard many rumours of whatever remained of the Khaenri’ans searching. Searching for what, he didn’t know. Maybe it wasn’t even real. 

But he was still afraid of the possibilities.

And yet, a part of him wished to love you freely, without fear, be with you, be your soulmate. 

The internal conflict was tearing him apart.

The clock struck twelve, signifying the start of your birthday.

You grinned excitedly, holding up your hand, on which a golden band had materialised. But then both your eyes widened, as it turned silver, before reshaping into a swirling silver pattern, almost like a bracelet, with a half heart in the middle. 

The same happened to Kaeya’s band, the formerly gold band having changed into a silver bracelet, same as yours, with the other half of the heart.

It was confirmed- you two were soulmates.

You two stared at each other, eyes wide and confused. It was silent in the room for a while, as you two let the fact sink in.

I suppose it was to be expected, after all, you two had stuck with each other from the moment you met.

A part of you was incredibly happy, now that you didn’t have to hide your feelings any more. However, another part of you was worried for Kaeya and how he’d take this. I mean, what sort of best friends- soulmates- would you two be, if you didn’t know each others’ deepest fears? You knew what he was afraid of. And you didn’t blame him for it in any way whatsoever.

You were the first to speak up, gently taking both his hands in yours. Something you had done a thousand times before, and yet, it felt different this time. “You alright, Kaeya?”

He slowly nodded, eyes staring off. You understood his internal turmoil and the fact that he’d need time, and didn’t press him. “Do you need space?” you asked softly. “To process this? I don’t mind if you do.” Finally he looked at you. There were a multitude of emotions swirling in those beautiful periwinkle eyes of his- confusion, surprise, shock, fear, and more, as they met yours. “You won’t be upset?” He asked quietly. You shook your head almost immediately. “No, Kae, I won’t. I understand why.” You said reassuringly, squeezing his hands with yours to reaffirm your statement. 

“I’ll see you later then..?Once I’ve sorted everything out?” “Sure, take as much time as you want, don’t rush, I’m always here for you, ‘kay? Now let me drop you off home.” You smiled at him.

The next evening, Kaeya texts you to meet him in your regular meeting spot- the swings in the park next to your houses. On text, he sounded like he’d made up his mind, causing you to be a bit nervous as you headed over, albeit a bit early.

You were just swinging gently, lost in your thoughts, when Kaeya walks up to you. He seems to be holding something behind his back, as you look at him curiously. “You alright now?” You question. “Yup.” he grinned back, that easygoing, charming smile that was reserved specifically for you back on his pretty face. “Got everything figured out now, and I have something for you too.” He smiles, bringing out the gift-wrapped package he had been holding behind his back. You chuckle, relieved, as you quickly open it. You stop short when you see what it is that he has given you.

“Forgot to say this, but happy birthday, [Y/N].” He said softly, bending down a bit to take the beautiful silver necklace that had your engraved to put it around your neck. “There.” he said, leaning back to admire you. “Now it matched with our bracelets.” He added, his words meaningful.

This was his way of giving you confirmation. “Let’s give this thing a try, huh? After all, if anything ever happens, I’ll be here to protect my beloved princess, won’t I?” He smirked at his successful attempt to make you flustered as he pulled you up from the swing, holding one of your hands gently in his.

[amiharana]

17‼

(ask game from here)

damn shawty calm down why you yelling at me! (jk but the text is huge on my screen and it's funny kJDKFJD)

17. Talk to me about the minutiae of your current WIP. Tell me about the lore, the history, the detail, the things that won’t make it in the text.

i'll talk a little bit about the fic i had planned for revalink week d1 >:] it's a prince revali x prince link au because i love royalty aus yahooo

i'm still deciding whether or not revali is going to be human/hylian and whether or not the rito people should still retain avian features or have their livelihoods and economy dependent on aviary travel and innovation, e.g. the rito people deal in the creation and distribution of paragliders, parachutes, air balloons, primitive airplanes, etc. not that i'll go in depth but i was thinking about it !

because of that, there will be a couple bird puns and shit LOL

revali's late mother the queen is named ceruli and i took her name from the species of bird, cerulean warbler

revali is the only child of the hebra royal family, because his father (kaneli) never remarried after ceruli died and thus revali has no siblings. he'd actually be a great big brother if he had any though :)

revali learned archery from his late mother, who was one of the greatest archers who ever lived. :) it's his fondest memories of before she passed, and he trains as frequently as he can, in hopes that he can one day be on par with her skill and honor her memory

link & zelda are fraternal twins and their mother also died when they were young so link n revali are on the same wavelength

zelda is older than link because she was born first, but she's the more natural born leader between her and link, who likes to take naps in the castle gardens or bake in the kitchens with the staff or something, which is why she's the heir to the throne of hyrule lol

thinking about having zelda meet mipha in the background, who has ceded her right to the throne to sidon, hence why he's also at the ball, attempting to court link because the ball is for zelda and link to find suitors

kaneli has one-sided beef with rhoam for marrying his children off for political gain because the rito people in the hebra kingdom have a strong belief in marrying for true love over status, etc.

he would have gone to the ball out of courtesy as royalty and maintain camaraderie or whatever, but knowing rhoam's ulterior motives and having a strong moral code as a rito, kaneli is now attending with spite and a plan masked under his warm and grandfatherly facade

so finally, here's an excerpt from when i was just braindumping about how i want the fic to go because i don't think it's going to make it into the fic and i liked that last sentence teehee:

"kaneli decides to kill two birds with one stone; bring revali to the hyrule birthday ball to meet prince link and have them fall in love. (1) to satisfy both revali’s wishes for strong political ties to the advantageous kingdom of hyrule and to marry for love and (2) save link from a loveless political marriage. kaneli hopes it might even kill a third bird: softening revali’s bristly personality with link’s sweetness."

[oviids]

pls share some of your spn fic recs 🥺🥺

ok, a few things first:

followers and mutuals who do not have supernatural brainworms, kindly avert your eyes

i don’t normally rec or even read much fanfic any more but this is a CRISIS ok (cont.)

there is so. much. content for deancas out there and i have incredibly high standards, several ancient ao3 bookmarks, can speedread, and want to spare you guys the experience of wading through it all.

i also have a section for spn femslash since I was pretty into that back in the day (sadly a lot less fan content for this :/)

I don’t really like au’s or pure smut (I honestly usually just skim or skip those scenes) so if you’re mainly looking for that kind of thing this probably won’t be very helpful to you. jsyk.

i’m not great at describing stuff but i’ll do my best, i’ll also try and add tw’s when neccesary.

i wil try and keep updating this with any other decent fics i find, feel free to rec stuff too since i’m like 7 years behind.(edit 1/25/21) this is getting looooong so i’m going to start making another list on my spn blog rather than update this one

(edit 1/3/21) since this has gotten pretty long i’ve added rating/approximate word counts and marked my particular favorites with an asterisk.

Dean/Cas fic:

So Says The Sword*** - explicit/85k. FUCK its good...au/time travel where dean is not pulled out of hell by cas and says yes to becoming the michael sword. honestly could serve as an alternative to actually watching the show, if you want to get into dean/cas without actually doing that to yourself.

Fata morgana.*  - teen/6k, pst s9 finale. very bela centric and i love it, she finds cas looking for dean in hell.

Redemption Road -misc/600+k. an incredibly long fic from a collaborative writing group back in the day. canon divergent from the end of s6 on, has a cool take on godstiel and the leviathans, as well as the lovecratian mythos connection. ngl when i reread it i only made it about 28% in but imo the casual reader can actually stop around there, the rest concerns a lovecraftian apocalypse that is still good (i think i don’t remember it very well) but not required to enjoy the first half. if you prefer i have an ebook version i can send you on gdrive.

Someone Who's Feeling For Me* - mature/45k, s12. they run into lisa braeden and dean thinks cas is into her while cas thinks dean still likes her. treats lisa way better than the show ever did and the miscommunication is pretty funny rather than annoying.

a turn of the earth - mature/95k. time travel fic where cas from s10 keeps showing up in deans life from a few years before s1 to right before the hellhounds take his soul.  slow burn, good character study, and at one point cas punches the dad in the face and it rules.

On the Wings of War - teen/85k, canon divergent s5. dean accidentally becomes the Horseman of War. plays fun, fast and loose with biblical lore, michael has some rights.

Named - mature/95k, alternate s5. EXTREMELY blasphemous in a fun sexy way. manages to predict metatron almost to a T. there’s one major character death and its literally jesus christ, everyone is very sad about it and it sets the rest of the story rolling. an alternate interpretation of cas’ mission to raise dean from hell which had me on the floor. ngl its kind of misogynistic at points, but its from 2010 and tracks with late oughts-2010 spn (sorry anna the author did you dirty here:/).

The Girlfriend Experience - explicit/15k. uhhh i don’t normally rec or even read smutty stuff unless someone i know is specifically asking for it but this has stuff like sam trying to be a good ally and dean thinking holding hands with cas is ‘kinda gay :/’ minutes after having gay sex with him.

i crippled your heart a hundred times - explicit/19k, s8. cas confesses his feelings and dean spends a long time getting his head out of his ass about it. truly hits different after the actual confession, despite being written six years early it feels like its actually what could have gone down more or less if the writers weren’t talentless demons who hate us.

My Roots Take Flight** - mature/125k. reverse au where cas is a hunter and dean’s an angel...OR IS IT???? an alternate retelling of s4. tw for briefly being set in a psychiatric hospital/the hospital being mentioned somewhat frequently throughout the fic, plus more references to torture in hell and heaven than usual.

The One Thing You Can't Lose* - teen/4k.you know those posts about how cas is a super-strong super-tough ancient warrior but he just lets dean tug him around because he likes it? thats it thats the fic.

Hands, From Which All Things Are Built - teen/14k, post s8′s ‘goodbye stranger.’ cas is on the run with the angel tablet but keeps in touch with sam and dean by text, he and dean still manage to be terrible at Actual communication.

Autrement, Danger - or, The Account of an Exceedingly Long Day - mature/30k, post s11. a monster that takes the appearance of your soulmate leads to some wild miscommunications and dealing with years of repression, also dean gets to see cas’ true form which is always cool. tw for non-graphic mentions of underage sexual assault/sex work.

Down to Agincourt - mature/explicit/900++++k, endverse continuation. endverse!cas survives his encounter with lucifer and discovers another time-displaced dean from s7. i’ve only read the two of four parts but its really good, veeeeery slow burn, has a lot of fun oc’s and takes a rather surprising but (imo) entertaining and intriguing turn into Hellenic history and mythology. usual tw’s for endverse/endverse!cas but nothing graphic, it’s actually pretty light-hearted (relatively speaking of course).

Nothing Equals the Splendor** - explicit/8k, THEE finale fix it fic you’ve been waiting for! posits that the entire final episode was just a (very bad and lame) djinn’s vision.

like moses and batman and james dean - explicit/31k, post s8. explores dean’s trauma and internalized homophoba from his technically canon experience with sex work and its impact on his relationship with cas. the sex work itself isn’t really shown in any detail but it’s still a relatively heavy fic.

Crazy Diamonds - explicit/25k, s4/alternate s14. fresh-out-of-hell dean and dean from 10 years in the future are displaced from time and sent to each other’s present.

where the weeds take root - explicit/30k. au where the men of letters kick them out of the bunker and they accidentally move out into the country, get over their codependence and semi retire. featuring chicken coop building, sam volunteering at a dog shelter, gardening, and blissfully mundane domesticity.

No Resting Place - teen/6k. djinn dream fic, switches back and forth between cas’ dream of being married to dean and retired from hunting to the aftermath when he wakes up. tw for brief mention of suicide since, y’know, djinn dream.

any port in a storm - mature/52k. post s8 finale. cas and dean have to pose as a couple going through a rough patch for a case and actually deal with their emotional baggage, cas struggles with being human and metatron is up to stuff.

all this and heaven too* - explicit/7k. in the author’s own words ‘...a love letter to every trans person who ever projected onto Dean Winchester.’ absolutely unzipped me emotionally and theologically, its just. so good. tw for very brief mentions of internalized transphobia/dysphoria.

Because it is* - mature/6k, finale fix it. killing chuck does not bring back anyone back and the winchesters spend a very long time dealing with what they’ve lost, cas and dean SOMEHOW still manage to have signifigant communication issues even after the confession. tw for suicidal thoughts/brief attempt.

Vena Amoris and Other Old-Fashioned Bullshit* - teen/4k, s6. when cas fell for dean it automatically soulbonded/angel married them, shenanigans ensue when dean finds out during the angel’s civil war. funny and actually written back when s6 was airing so cas is still (or at least pretending to be) kind of an OP asshole which is fun.

Rinse, Repeat - teen/3k, s8. angsty character study of cas as he’s reprogrammed and trained to kill dean. not really dean/cas since its just cas’ pov of canon events but its beautifully written and ends with him snapping out of it through the power of love (also now a canon event!).

Emergence - explicit/59k, canon divergent after s11. dean meets a hunter he only recognizes as their friend claire novak’s missing father, but soon realizes he might be the answer behind the mysterious void in his memories and feelings (aka everyone’s memories of cas are completely wiped away for three years).

Cuckoo And Nest - explicit/10k, early established relationship/character study, cas tries to figure out how he fits into dean’s life and space in the bunker.

Build a Home* - teen/20k, canon divergent s12. sam and eileen are cute and turn the bunker into men of letters/hunters hq and everyone but cas moves in, mutual miscommunication issues and pining ensues.

Down in the River - teen/5k, early s8, cas prays to dean in purgatory while sam and dean try to figure out a way to get him out.

Teaching Poetry to Fish* - mature/52k, ?? BC through the entire series/canon divergent s14 and 15. retelling of crucial scenes throughout the shows timeline from cas’ pov, feat. actual fish and poetry.

the minor fall, the major lift - gen/4k, post confession/finale fixit. dean goes into the empty to save cas and runs into several old friends (and enemies).

With the Kisses of His Mouth* - teen/3k, gen later seasons. dean and cas keep kissing by accident.

Remaining Grace - explicit/109k, alternate s6. au where cas asks dean for help with raphael and dean, of course, does. tw for temporary major character death/semi-graphic depictions of alcohol withdrawal.

The face of heaven.* - teen/10k, au, dean is a regular guy and cas is a fallen star (think ‘stardust’, kinda).

Stories Are Made of Mistakes*  - teen/5k. newly human cas has trouble getting used to a human body and humanity in general, but still figures out that he and dean are A Thing before dean does.

Hurry Up And Wait - mature/21k, canon divergent s12. a fairyland and quite possibly LOTR related case comes up and dean goes full fanboy, mary is introduced to the wonders of the peter jackson adaptions, many references and comparisons (including between cas and dean’s ‘friendship’ and arwen/aragon). also charle is still alive and has just been doing fairy stuff this whole time.

There Are Many Things - explicit/28k, s9. cas is extremely lonely/touch-starved and trying to figure out this whole human thing, as well as where he and dean stand after being kicked out of the bunker.

It's A Long Life to Always Be Longing - teen/40k, post s11 finale. amara helps dean by putting him in a magical coma so he can finally get some much needed rest and show him possible futures for him, sam and cas. meanwhile sam and cas go on a roadtrip (or several) to find componets for a spell to wake dean up. really good sam and cas friendship, they actually talk about their shared lucifer trauma and stuff.

Non-Photo Blue - gen/2k, s4/5/alternate s5. fifty moments from cas’ memories of dean.

Tall Grass - explicit/57k, canon divergent post series. cas becomes the ultimate plant dad. feat the wayward sisters gang, cathartic character growth, fun oc’s, domesticity, and lots of actual botanical info-dumping.

on vessels - no rating/gen/2k. established dean/cas, cas tells dean about how he used to imagine what it would be like to have him as his vessel.

search for tomorrow on every shore* - teen/11k, post-finale (extremely derogatory). some angels in jack’s new heaven act out and dean gets temporarily resurrected in 2003 and runs into his younger self.

Architecture of the Minotaur’s Heart - explicit/45k, very canon divergent post s1. dean’s new house seems to have a life and mind of its own, while in his dreams he sees glimpses of a world and apocalypse that never came to be and an angel that looks strangely like his mysterious neighbor, cas. loosely inspired by the book house of leaves (which i highly recommend for fans of weird horror).

The Distance Of The Setting Sun - explicit/17k, post s5. established dean/cas relationship, team free will finally takes advantage of cas’ abilities to go on vacation around the world.

diamond star halo - teen/5k, s11. dean lets cas use him as a temporary vessel while he recovers from rowena’s spell, sam is a long-suffering third-wheel.

Make Known** - teen/16k, s6/7. dean struggles to understand how cas could have become his enemy and whether he ever truly knew him in the first place.

blunt little instrument* - mature/1.4k, post finale. dean finally confronts his father in heaven, very cathartic.

my heart a compass*** - teen/10k, post confession. the empty forces cas to re-experience his most regretted moments while dean tries to snap him out of it and bring him home.

A Crash Course in Someone Else's History - teen/11k, s6. cas from the very start of s4 is brought forward in time by s6!cas to distract the brothers from his and crowley’s plans.

The Cuckoo Father - mature/8k, s7 au. the woman who found cas in the river post-leviathans does not marry him bc he was sent to her by god or whatever, but actually identifies him as jimmy novak and sends him back to claire and amelia.

The Dead Dean Clause* - teen/5k, post alt s5 ending. team free will celebrates surviving taking down lucifer by getting blitzed, cas lies to a cop and gets an impromptu driving lesson. title/description sound dark i know but it’s actually very funny and light.

Suck It, Judy Garland - mature/20k, s12 (after the ‘i love you...i love all of you’ episode). cas and sam have to pretend to be a couple for a case and dean is NOT happy about it.

By Daylight and In Dream - teen/16k, s5. pre-dean/cas, dean invites cas to use his dreams to hide from the other angels. tw for very brief mention of a memory/dream of alastair sexually assaulting dean.

The Five People You Meet in Heaven - mature/22k, post-canon. an actually happy (if sometimes bittersweet) heaven endgame written several years ago, though some details are rather eerily similar to the show’s ending.

heaven is a place on earth* - teen/2k. dean’s pov of some of the times cas left him behind throughout the show, and one alternate ending where he finally gets to stay.

I Cleanse The Mirror - teen/20k, alternate s6. dean’s body is stolen by an ancient elemental and his soul has to hitch a ride in cas’ vessel.

an exploration of gender; angelic*** - mature/4k. *oscar isaac voice* lets get into angel gender politics!! aka cas is trans.

Zenith - explicit/33k, s9. after 9x06 an angry witch curses cas with the ability to see supernatural beings and human souls.

La cucina. - gen/3k, alt s9. dean goes wild helping a newly-human cas find out what kinds of food he likes, or the early s9 domesticity we deserved!

Dean Winchester, Cocksucker at Rest***** - teen/7k, post-finale. john and mary finally come over for dinner and john reacts to dean/cas in a rather predictable fashion. SOOOOOOOOO good omg, its so funny and a little sad and very very cathartic. part of a series that has a few other really good short fics.

The Way You Didn't Go - teen/5k, s15. coda to 15.09, dean has nightmares about the moc!cas timeline.

On Drowning - teen/28k. dean saves cas after he nearly drowns, they both try and deal with the physical/mental fallout (aka the fic where thee iconic “you only touch me when you think I’m dead or dying” originates). tw for realistic depictions of drowning/triage/misc medical information.

The Thirty-Six Questions That Lead to Love* - mature/13k. claire has dean and cas pretend to be her gay dads for a case and they play the titular 36 question game, get mistaken for swingers, and birdwatch, among other things.

Assorted F/F stuff:

Deep Breaths* - mary/ellen, au where mary said no to azazel’s deal and let john stay dead, still becomes a milf.

Like Rebel Diamonds - krissy/claire, they become hunter gf’s on the hunt for cas to kick his ass for taking jimmy. not-so-stealth dean/cas as well.

To Ash and Bone - anna/ruby, same author as the previous fic (p much all of her stuff is good from what i recall). au where ruby is a witch and helps anna when she’s cursed.

Holy Clockwork Angels - jo/ruby, STEAMPUNK au with very cool worldbuiilding.

At Day's End - jo/anna (my fucking KINGDOM for more jo/anna content, the dean/cas parallels are allllll there), au where they are both at the camp in the endverse and gfs.

these posts - ok so not actually a fic but i’m now obsessed with this hannah/meg dynamic.

Tagelied - mary/ellen, the true story of how ellen got into hunting before angels interfered.

Hell's Bells** - meg/abaddon, alternate s8/9 where meg survives crowley’s attack with sam’s help and teams up with abaddon (who she has a sk year old crush on) to take back hell.

The Ecstasy of the Rose - anna/ruby, anna travels back in time to escape heaven and becomes a signifigant part of ruby’s old human life.

Angel Underground - anna/jo, kind of an urban fantasy au with a very intriguing premise (sadly its very short, i’d love to see more if this ‘verse).

Clover, Flame - billie/mary, billie was always the reaper that showed up to take mary after her death(s) over the years.

Drag Me To Heaven - anna/ruby, a variant on the ‘last night on earth’ thing with dean.

Come Home* - jo/anna, canon-divergent au where anna is the new waitress at the roadhouse and helps jo set up a (probably not really) haunted house for halloween.

[rainandandy]

Chemtrails (Yelena Belova x reader)

Summary: You and Yelena are finally free from the mind control of being a black widow. How does everything fare out as you both return to Ohio to start a new life?

Pairings: Yelena Belova x reader, Natasha Romanoff x Steve Rogers (Kinda platonic, kinda not), Alexei Shoskatoff x Melina Vostokova

Word Count: 1,862

Translations: Malishka (Baby), Krasotka (Beautiful),  Liybimaya (My Love)

Masterlist

There were some people who had the idea that being on the run meant being scared, lonely, always on edge. Perhaps that is how it should have felt. You just felt like you were free. Free from being used in any way. They treated you as if you were just another pawn on the chessboard as if you were just another number to them. It is a piece that no one will remember.

Yelena too. The two of you had freed yourselves and the others from the harsh crutches of being a black widow. A killer and a trained spy in all the fields that a spy could be. Sly, sneaky, conniving, and murderous. There had never been a time when you had any control over your actions. Never being able to be yourself. Living life on the edge, skirting all over the world in a number of days. Killing people without a second thought, because you weren't able to control your mind. You weren't in control.

Until Yelena came along. Till she abolished the control over your mind and cut the tracker from your leg. Till she held you while your body wracked with sobs of finally being free.

She stayed with you, helped you recover physically and mentally. Patching up wounds with medical bits she found in gas stations. Driving stolen cars and motorbikes through the darkness of the night. A new city each day, hiding in rundown motels on the side of highways. Each one of them smelling worse than the previous one.

In the aftermath of Dreykov's death, you would keep your eyes on the news to make sure the black widows left over weren't doing any harm. Once you both reached Ohio, where she planned to meet up with her family and establish a base to free the black widows, you both could be free. Over the long nights of traveling and the days of laying low, you went from strangers to lovers very quickly.

You weren't sure when it happened, but she fell first. A glance at you that was once cold has become a loving gaze. As she learned what food you liked, she would be sure to bring it back from her grocery store runs. It was something you didn't notice at first. She changed her attitude towards you suddenly and when her touches on your wounds became lighter and she began to tell you more about her life, you too began to fall. You discovered why she was aiming for Ohio in the first place. In other words, she did not want to be what she was made to be. Both of your skills would only earn you dirty money, and she desperately just wanted to settle down. You did not talk about children between the two of you, but you frequently talked about a dog shelter.

As soon as you reached a small suburban home on the outskirts of Ohio, you and your partner quickly went into undercover mode. Posing as a newlywed couple, with her sister who is a part-time science teacher and her parents who are coming to welcome the new family. In the morning it appeared like bliss to the neighbors, but really it was at night when the family seemed to sit around and play Monopoly that they planned their roles for recovering the last of the black widows. The rest of the widows who had been freed would come over under the guise of being friends, but Yelena and you would give them money and new identification provided by Mason, so they could start their new lives. The widows wanted their chance to live a normal life, just as you and Yelena did. Many of those who rely on doing what they know only too well, choose to work with Melina in St Petersburg.

In less than a year, everyone was free. With the last of the widows freed, Dreykov's remnants were abolished. You and Yelena were finally free. As soon as the word was given you and Yelena marched straight down to the shelter where she picked a gorgeous American akita and Yelena straight away called her Fanny. When Natasha heard the name, she rolled her eyes and asked, "Really Yelena? I hate that name. You know how much I hate it. In response, Yelena hit back with an infamous "HA!"" and Fanny had now become a part of your dysfunctional family. Alexei and Melina flew in and out every few months, checking up on both of you or on some wild mission to find Captain America. It was much to Alexei’s surprise the day Natasha brought Steve Rogers home, posing as her husband.

“Papa, you remember Steve. My adoring husband" Each word spit back as fast as possible while making sure Alexei didn't start a mini war among them right under their noses. Natasha was extremely coy at first and you didn't know whether there was anything more than just friendship between them.

During their time at the Ohio house, Yelena and Natasha would relax in the small pool that is located out the back. Their tanned skin became more obvious as they raced in laps of the pool against one another under the scorching summer sun. The whole family had a good laugh when Steve wore swim trunks with the American flag on them and then had another fit when Alexei wore ones with the Russian flag on them. “I feel like all my dreams have come true” Yelena said hazily as she kissed your hand on the lawn chairs.

“What dream is that Krasotka?” you asked, smiling as you didn’t fully take in her deep words. “I have my family back” you felt the strings of your heart being pulled at the softness of the girl's words.

She pulled on your hand and led you to join her on the lawn chair, sitting in her lap. As she wrapped her arms around your waist, you looked up into the clear blue sky to see a distant plane leave a long white trail in the clear blue sky. “What are the white lines made of?" It was a question you asked aloud. "Maybe the government is slowly poisoning us with Dreykov's toxic chemicals," she said in a funny way, but you knew it was on everyone's mind. What if he wasn't really dead after all. What if the dream turned into a nightmare and you were no longer yourself. Your panic caused your breath to quicken its pace, and you touched the beautiful gemstones you wore around your neck. Some eastern culture your therapist had thrust onto you, rubbing some amethyst and turquoise would help ease the pain of the memories. In a manner of speaking, it did work, as it eased the nightmares little by little. There were times when holding those tiny stones felt like clutching a lifeline. You desperately try to hold onto this reality with Yelena as long as possible. The blissfulness of it all. Yelena became restless after losing the constant sense of action that had been part of her life. The excitement of going to the farmers market only lasted for a limited amount of time. It was one of those days when the rumble of an engine and the smell of gas broke your concentration from doing laundry, and you were met by a gorgeous vintage red Chevy pulling into the driveway. The look on Yelena's face was incomprehensible, which made you hard to believe that she had just went out and bought such an immaculate, expensive-looking vehicle. The car was a convertible and fanny sat in the back, her tongue hanging out, panting in the golden sun, as she sat there. "We are supposed to keep things on the low down" you whispered to your 'fake' wife, scolding her.

It's time to enjoy yourself, Malishka!"

You knew it was worth it when the rouge on her lips matched the color of the cherry red car. When she opened the passenger side door, she motioned for you to get into the car.

"No no, I think it's time for me to take this baby for a spin". You pushed her across the white leather as you got into the driver's seat and sat in it. There was a soft white leather under your grip on the wheel. "Don't you like it, sweetheart?" Yelena smirked at you as you adjusted the mirror while Yelena was chatting. Upon turning the key, the engine roared to life. "Shhh sweetheart, you'll pay for this later" and you took off racing down the avenues of white picket fences, passing children playing in the front gardens.

Families who seemed perfect on the outside but you knew that each one had their problems. As you reached well over the speed limit, with your hair blowing wildly behind you, you felt as if you were at liberty. It was impossible for those families to stop you from doing what you did. You could not be stopped by Dreykov. At that moment, all you wanted was to keep speeding along the winding roads while Yelena put her hands up, grasping at the invisible air. She was your sweet love. Your happiness. She made the freedom worth it. The winding roads soon gave way to a small clearing where you were able to park your car on the side of the road. The engine died slowly, and her smile was beaming back at you, pure happiness oozing from both of you. Fanny jumped out of the car, her paw pads crushing the gravel under her feet as she jumped. She trotted around sniffing at the new surroundings. In the company of Yelena, you made your way to a small bench that overlooked a valley. The sun was looking low and heavy as it was making its way towards the horizon for yet another day. The silence was relaxing, settling over you as you stared out at the sky. Yelena spoke openly from the heart or perhaps her soul when she said, "I am not religious, but if there is a god out there somewhere, I hope he lets it stay like this forever.". The truth is, she was never one to think of such things in this way, especially in regards to god, religion or even something as grave as losing what you had. "It's not going to happen. We have made it. Nothing could break us apart, Liybimaya”

I know, I know, I feel silly thinking about it when this perfect paradise is all around us; but I cannot help it.

"There is nothing wrong with contemplating God…. or our paradise…. If you have second thoughts-”

“No. God no.” She took a deep breath and replied, “That's not what I'm saying. I am terrified that I will wake up back in the red room. That all of this was just a dream"

You scooted over to her side of the bench and cradled her against you and said, "I'm real, baby.". The sun set, leaving you and your partner in the darkness, the streetlight flickering behind you. It is time for us to go home"

[fetchisnotawordgretchen]

Headcanons For A Mc Who Gets Sick Often

Warnings⚠️: none except mentions of sickness

Suitors: Mozart, Arthur, Isaac, and Vincent

Summary: These are Headcanons for an mc who can often get sick a lot and is prone to illnesses.

°~°~°~°~°~°~°~°~°~°~°~°~°~°~°~°~°~°~°~°~°~

Mozart:

Mozart at first would just think that you're tired or lazy because you stay in bed all of the time, but that's just not true.

When he finds out that your immune system isn't that strong he'll feel a bit bad. Key word 'a bit'

As time goes on you two begin to grow closer and Mozart realizes how much time you spend in your room that you've begun to call home. He'll try to lure you out and even at times, bribe you.

"Hey Mc if you come outside of your room with me we could maybe go for a walk?... pft no I don't want to spend time with you. I just want to uhm get you out of your room. You've been cooped up in that room for almost 3 hours. Come outside with me... please?"

When you're sick he would probably do anything for you. You want hot chocolate? He already has a cup. You want a warm fuzzy blanket? He has 20. You want to listen to him play the piano? He'll write you a whole 2 hour song.

No matter what Mozart cares for you in his own language. Sometimes the residents are a bit jealous with the treatment you get when you're sick.

"Please be more careful Mc.. I don't want you getting hurt. Now come on I'll go make some hot chocolate and we can go spend some time together.

°♧°♧°♧°♧°♧°♧°♧°♧°♧°♧°♧°♧°♧°♧°

Arthur:

Arthur is a doctor after all and he'll probably check up on you, and help you if you're sick. But you start to become more and more sick quite often and he's a bit worried. Though he'll never admit it

He'll try to take your mind off things reading to you, telling you funny stories about his life, or even occasionally telling you funny stories about Theo.

When you feel fine enough to go out into public Arthur would go with you, and make sure that you're feeling OK.

When you fall ill he'll stay with you any chance he gets. Arthur might even bring Vic into your room and continue writing some of his book.

"Hey Mc! Are you feeling better? That's great then, you know you can always come to me when you feel sick. There's no need to be embarrassed of it love! Now come on I'll go make some hot tea for you."

Arthur would definitely be very careful around you though. He would make sure that everyone in the mansion is in good health if not, he's not letting them any where near you.

"I love you Mc and I don't want you getting sick all of the time. So drink the hot tea then we can go out into the garden and relax. Are you ready love? Good, Let's go!"

•¤•¤•¤•¤•¤•¤•¤•¤•¤•¤•¤•¤•¤•¤•¤•¤•

Isaac:

Isaac would probably keep his distance away from you at first, like he does to everybody.

But then as time went on and you guys start talking more, he'll develop romantic feelings for you.

Once you mention that you get sick frequently Isaac would most likely offer to take care of you whenever you're sick.

But whenever you do get sick he'll do whatever it takes to help you, in his own way of course.

"Hey maybe you should just take it easy for a while... Oh be quiet Mc! Just focus on getting better while I go get Sebastian to make you something."

Once you two become a couple Isaac would make sure that everyone is in good health before coming even remotely near you.

"Mc I just want what's best for you do you shouldn't overwork yourself like that. Please take care of yourself better.. ok?.

☆°☆°☆°☆°☆°☆°☆°☆°☆°☆°☆°☆°☆°☆°

Vincent:

As always Vincent is quite friendly towards you and figures out about your situation early on. He'll try to do anything he can do to help.

Of course he becomes in touch with his emotions and falls deeply in love with Mc. It just tears him to pices when he sees you sick in bed.

Vincent doesn't want you to feel unwell or sick most of the time, so he'll do things to distract you. Maybe like telling you a story or painting In your room so you can watch him.

"Mc how about we read a story Arthur wrote? And maybe some hot Coco with Marshmallows! How does that sound sweetie?"

When you're not sick he'll take you out into town and let you buy anything you want. After your day of shopping Vincent would take you to a nice flower field and lay down with you.

"Mc I really love you, so please take care of yourself. I hate seeing you sick but, on the bright side we have more time to have fun without any distractions!

¤•¤•¤•¤•¤•¤•¤•¤•¤•¤•¤•¤•¤•¤•¤•¤•¤

Hey it's been a hot minute since I've posted anything so I hope you guys enjoy!

Please take care of yourselves, and 234 followers?!? Thank you so so much! It makes me practically glee with joy knowing that people love my writing! Now be safe and remember that I care about you <3

[deannaroxannewrites]

Tropetember Day 7 - Mutual Pining / Requited/Unrequited Love / Angst with a happy ending

My boys

Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x GN!Reader

Fandom: Criminal Minds

Rating: Teen and up

TW: Angst (all of the angst), Angst with a happy ending, Witness Protection

AN: Day 7 of @tropetember. Another Hotch story that could be expanded into a small series. Enjoy the angst (and fluff because I CANNOT HELP MYSELF)

You've been looking to spending a quiet day with your boys, until a phone call turns your world upside down.

Find this story on Ao3 here.

Word Count: 1.6k

You were in the middle of pottering around the kitchen putting your groceries away when the phone rang.

Glancing at it, you realise it’s Aaron. Why would he be ringing you right now? Jack’s soccer game wouldn’t have been finished for very long and they usually got a treat before coming to visit you.

You answer with a smile, you were looking forward to spending the day with your boys.

“Hi sweetie, what can I do for you?” You ask.

Aaron says your name and his voice shakes. You instantly stop what you’re doing. Something is wrong. Something really bad is happening. You can tell.

“Scratch.” He takes a shuddering breath. “Scratch was at Jack’s game.”

You gasp and panic floods through you.

“Is he ok? Are you both ok? He didn’t get to either of you did he?”

"No, he didn't."

There's a pause and you feel your heart start to calm. At least they're OK, although you can't figure out what's happening. Unfortunately, your relief at them both being unharmed is immediately destroyed.

"Jack and I are being put into witness protection."

You hear the glass you were holding smash as it connects with the marble floor of the kitchen. It's funny, you feel like a spectator in your own body. The only other thing you're aware of is that you feel like you can't breathe.

Aaron calls your name a few times but you're hyper fixated on one thing he says. 'Jack and I.' Not we. Why hadn't he said we?

"Can I not come too?" Your voice is small. Lost. "If this madman is following Jack, he'll know who I am, Aaron."

You hear him exhale.

"I know. I tried to get the Marshals to offer you the choice of coming with us." You imagine he's scrubbing his hand down his face in frustration. "They said that, since Scratch's focus is the team, and I will no longer be around or know what's happening, you will no longer be at risk." He lets out a scoff.

Tears silently trace down your face. Your world was ending but, no matter how much you wanted to beg and scream and demand they stay, this was already a done deal. Jack's safety was the most important thing in the world and you wouldn't dare risk it for your selfish desires.

"OK." You take a moment to breathe and clear your throat. "Can you do something for me?"

"Of course."

"Tell Jack I love him? Give him a big hug and kiss and tell him that I'll see him when this is over?"

That breaks him, and he quietly sobs out your name.

"You're going to be OK. Both of you. And I'll be here waiting." You take a shaky breath. "Is there anything I can do?"

"I'm putting everything into your name. I don't mind if you move into the apartment or if you rent it out and put everything in storage. Just try to hold onto the keepsakes and Jack's stuff."

"I've got it. Don't worry. It's in good hands."

"The very best." He gives a shaky laugh. "I love you so much. I'm so sorry."

"It's not your fault Aaron. God, I love you so much."

You both go quiet, knowing you don't have long until the Marshals disconnect his number.

"I can't ask you to wait for me." He tells you. It makes a sob break through your restraint. "That would be selfish of me. Just know that I love you. And, once this is over, we'll see you again."

"I know, it's OK. I love you."

"I…."

The line goes dead and, like the glass spread across the floor, you break.

---------

The weeks following are hazy in your memory. You imagine it's not totally dissimilar to a bereavement. After all, you'd discussed seeing each other again, but you both knew that there was a chance it may not happen. Scratch had been evading law enforcement for months with ease. He was watching Jack and no-one even knew. It didn't bode well.

Time continued to pass. Eventually, from around the 6th month mark, people started offering to set you up with friends/relatives/colleagues. You weren't getting any younger they kept saying. You can't miss out on the rest of your life.

It was something you were well aware of. You were only a couple of years younger than Aaron so you were moving past your prime, particularly if you wanted to have kids of your own. You couldn't do it though. It just felt wrong when Aaron was out there alone somewhere with a new name and identity. How could you move on? Instead, you focussed on work, even getting a promotion for your efforts.

You didn't move into the apartment, you couldn't bring yourself to. You and Aaron had been discussing moving, and potentially purchasing a proper house with a garden Jack play soccer in in the future, mere days before everything happened. It was just another thing that didn't feel right. Instead, you moved the important things out to Dave's basement. He had the space and it would be much safer than a storage locker. It also helped sooth his guilt over the fact that none of the team were supposed to have much contact with you to try and keep you off Scratch's hotlist.

Since you didn't need the income from the apartment, you instead approached a charity who worked with women and families escaping domestic violence. You'd offered them the apartment at a reduced rate for short term lets that rolled month by month, with potential to go up to a year. The plan was to give people time to get back on their feet and regain their independence in a safe and secure environment.

You'd had two small families in so far. Both had moved on after securing jobs with good salaries and new full time accommodation. They were both keeping you updated about how they and their kids were doing, and you were happy that you were able to help them even just a little. It was empty at the moment and you were busy organising some basic maintenance and were going to repaint some of the rooms to freshen it up.

You'd just been on the phone with Derek, who'd offered to do the small repair jobs you needed doing, when someone knocked at the door.

Glancing at the clock and seeing it was nearly 9pm, you paused and texted Derek as a safety precaution. It was probably nothing, but better safe than sorry.

The knock sounded again, a little more urgent this time, and you hustled to the door to open it.

When you realised who was on the other side, your knees gave way.

There in front of you, looking almost exactly the same as when he left, was Aaron with Jack peeking out from behind him.

Realising what was happening, he reached out to steady you and you threw yourself into his arms, sobbing as if your life depended on it.

He held you just tightly, rocking from side to side until you pulled back. You lower yourself into a crouch and hold your arms out to Jack, who collides with you with enough force to knock you on your behind.

You both laugh as you land on the floor, a light, carefree combination of sounds that tinkles around the room as you press kisses all over his face. Aaron bobs down to join the hug before helping you both to your feet and guiding you all to your sofa.

"I'm so glad you're both back" you tell them. Jack is snuggled into your lap and you're snuggled into Aaron. Declarations of love pass easily and frequently between the three of you and it fills you with warmth.

You spend the evening catching up with them. Apparently Scratch had been caught at the end of last week but it had taken this long for word to get through to the Marshals and for them to organise transferring them home.

Jack tells you over dinner (pizza, Jack picked) about his school and all the things he's learnt since the last time he saw you. Aaron tells you about his cover job as a law clerk in the backwater town of Nowhere, Iowa. In return, you tell them about how you got promoted at work and what you've done with the apartment in their absence. Aaron's eyes shine with pride as you explain the cause and you know it's one that's close to his heart.

Before you know it, it's almost midnight and Aaron is suggesting they go back to the hotel that they've been set up in for the next few days. You won't allow that though. They'll be lucky if they're allowed to leave your sight ever again.

You all brush your teeth together in the bathroom while joking around before getting sorted and all clambering into your bed together.

Wrapped in Aaron's arms, with Jack tucked up against your side, you finally feel whole for the first time since that dreaded phone call.

"My boys," you gently sigh. "I love you both".

Aaron presses a soft kiss to your forehead, and you let the sound of their breathing calm you as you fall into the deepest nights sleep you've had in forever.

Even better, they're still there when you wake up.

[retvenkos]

“shall i capture your heart with a song?”

A/N: lol, i only know the witcher on netflix, and what i have found out about jaskier via tumblr osmosis, so how accurate is this? i guess we’ll have to see, lol.

requested HERE WE ARE, IMAGINING WHAT IT WOULD BE LIKE TO BE CHILDHOOD FRIENDS TO LOVERS TO EVENTUAL MARRIAGE WITH THE ONLY AND ONLY JASKIER....

well, seeing as jaskier is of noble birth, i’m going to say that you are, too.

your families are old friends, so when you guys first meet, (i want to say you’re like 8 or 9) it’s at some celebration or another and at first you’re a little unsure if you should talk to each other or just,,,, stand there.

one of your parents absent mindedly tells you to talk to the boy, and so you have to do the awkward introductions.

“i’m (y/n) (l/n)”

“i’m julian alfred pankratz.”

“that’s unfortunate.”

“hey!”

“don’t worry. i’ll find something better to call you.”

“yeah, well... i’ll find something better to call you.”

(sorry, guys,,,,, i still can’t get over jaskier’s real name)

the two of you decide to sneak away from your parents to get some food or something, and then you eventually decide to sneak away from the party entirely 

it was jaskier’s idea, really. he was trying to avoid some family or something - the family that thinks they are oh so better than you and compare achievements and what not...

the two of you are just wandering (jaskier’s sense of direction is horrible so it’s really up to you to keep everything straight) and you end up in some field or another, talking about whatever comes to mind. jaskier is telling you stories and you scoff.

“you’re like a weed, julian alfred pankratz. like a.... dandelion.”

“i am not!”

“what flower would you want to be, then?”

“something better than a dandelion!”

“like what, a buttercup?”

“yOU are.... are like....”

“like what?”

“...aconite! that’s a poison.”

“aconites are related to buttercups, dandelion. you can’t get rid of me.”

and jaskier thinks it’s wildly funny that you know horticulture, of all things. he finds it so funny, in fact, he fails to miss that you’ve coined a new nickname for him.

it seems that all the time, afterward, you run into jaskier and his family. by virtue of constantly seeing each other, the two of you end up being really good friends.

it’s a running gag that you love horticulture, and since the illustrious julian alfred pankratz uses it against you at every turn, you fluctuate between calling him “jaskier” and “dandelion”. he eventually gets used to it, but he hates it when others start to catch on.

he also comes up with ridiculous nicknames for you, but none of them quite seem to stick. he’s constantly cycling through through new ones, hoping to find the right one.

the two of you hang out a lot, but since you do a lot of reading or gardening and need jaskier to stop chatting with you for five minutes he picks up the lute and learns to play it really well.

you’re the first one who tells him his singing voice is quite beautiful.

“i’m sorry, did you just say my singing voice is ‘quite beautiful’?”

“it’s nice, okay?”

“nice?”

“if you keep this up, i’ll just have to insult you.”

“you’d never.”

“do you not remember the first time we met?”

“like it was yesterday.”

“i laid down some pretty decent insults, if i remember right.”

“i called you poison.”

“yeah, but aconites are pretty. unlike dandelions.”

and jaskier scoffs. “and buttercups?”

“they’re not bad looking.”

so we all know that jaskier supposedly gets into poetry when he’s 19 because he’s inspired by his love for the countess de stael,,, bUT,,,, consider this instead:

he actually gets into poetry for you.

jaskier has had a few loves at this point, and with each one, he’s a nervous wreck. you always help him by curating the most beautiful bouquets (all of which come from your amazing, thriving garden) and you are always there to help him with his flirting (which needs serious help,,,, i’m not even sure you’re cut out for the job)

you guys have probably even kissed before - both of you were regrettably drunk (don’t tell your parents) and jaskier said he desperately needed ‘the practice’. plus, he wanted to know!!!! was he a good kisser or not? no one else would rate him on a scale from 1-10 with brutal but accurate honesty! neither of you fully remember what exactly happened, come morning, but you remember the lead up to the moment and jaskier remembers the thoughts running through his head afterward... both of you agree not to speak of it.

anyway, when jaskier starts to realize that he has these awkward feelings that seem suspiciously illicit, he knows he has to get them out, somehow, but you are the only one who would listen to his complaints, and he very well can’t tell you.

so he decides he has to write them down.

but clearly they can’t be literal, lest someone stumble upon them,,,,, so he has to learn the secret art of poetry.

you, of course, notice how oddly quiet hanging out with jaskier has become, and his odd questions on flower symbolism, and it doesn’t take you long until you realize that, of all things, jaskier has turned to poetry.

“you can’t make fun of me for liking horticulture, anymore, dandelion. you’re a  p o e t .”

“at least i’m a good one.”

and you flick his forehead

“what will your stage name be? surely julian alfred pankratz won’t work.”

“which one should it be? jaskier or dandelion?”

and you laugh, the sound like a summer breeze.

“i knew you’d come to appreciate my nicknames, eventually.”

jaskier frequently “serenades” you, under the guise that he’s practicing, of course, but it’s also his not so subtle way of seeing if you like his poetry and his songs - they are for you, after all.

“you’ll certainly capture hearts with that one.”

“did i capture yours?”

and you, feeling very flustered, especially seeing as you’ve had feelings for jaskier for a while now, can only let out a guttural sort of scoff.

“of course,” and you try to say it over the top and jokingly, but you can feel your face heating up.

and jaskier winks. you huff and turn back to your books.

oh, yikes, i didn’t realize this was getting a little long,,,, let’s speed things up.

everyone knows that you and jaskier are end game. your families think it’s vvv sweet, and everyone that either you or jaskier attempt to woo know it’s only going to be a passing fancy because,,,, have you seen the way you look at each other? like you hang the moon and the stars?

but of course, both of you are dramatic as hell, so you frequently have conversations like:

“we’re piss poor in love, aren’t we?”

“i guess the world just doesn’t understand our genius.”

“terrible that i have to share this lonely cleverness with the likes of you.”

“absolutely devastating.”

and you just sit there for a while, staring at the ceiling.

maybe you guys do some traveling together for a while, but you eventually find a place to put down roots (lol, horticulture jokes). maybe you run an apothecary! that would be precious. 

either way, jaskier is a bard so when he isn’t traveling around, he’s staying with you. 

a frequent request of yours goes something like this:

“dandelion, play me a song.”

“what kind?”

“a love song.”

and he does, and afterward, he sits down across from you and winks.

“did i capture your heart with that one?”

and some nights you’re a little too tired to make a show of it and some of that blissful candor slips out and slaps jaskier across the face when you smile and say, “yes.”

if you haven’t noticed, the two of you hella dance around your feelings. it’s insane, because catchphrase is: “anything for you” meanwhile you are the most soft™ for him and yet you don’t seem to clue in.

100%, you are going to have to be the one that expresses your love first, because jaskier is the definition of suffering in silence

but what’s also really funny is you both probably try to keep it hidden just how long you have loved each other for, and yet you are both nosy as hell and want to know how long this has been going on, so it leads to really funny conversations where you are both trying to dodge giving a proper timeline, but are drying to coax one out of the other.

ohmygod, i forgot to do marriage headcanons

alright, lightning round: firstly, i don’t think it takes you guys long to get married - you have known each other for so long, and you already act like a married couple, might as well make it official

jaskier refuses to let anyone else sing at his wedding, but you eventually coax him into it because how else are you going to dance with him?

let jaskier invite all of his witcher friends. the divide between your wealthy families and the witchers would be funny as hell. like inlaws that don’t get along but wORSE.

some quick marriage thoughts:

jaskier has definitely learned the art of flowers, thanks to you, so (1) he leaves you flowers everywhere, and (2) both of you get to garden with each other all the time.

sleep and jaskier don’t mix - no matter what time of the night, you can wake up and he’s up and about, doing something or another. maybe he’s writing a song, maybe he’s eating, maybe he’s arguing with yennefer (she often visits, just to antagonize jaskier. you guys are great friends) in the livingroom and trying to keep his voice down 

similar with nicknames, jaskier is constantly using pet names, trying to decide on which one is best. it doesn’t really work out, but maybe the most common one is he’ll call you his muse.

and it only sounds cheesy 20% of the time

you guys get to go to parties together! that’s fun - you like dressing up and sneaking away half way through because you’re bored. you guys steal food and hide out until they realize the bard is missing and drag him back.

so we all know jaskier is big on compliments, and it only gets worse when the two of you are together. it’s like,,,, yes. now i can shower you with love and affection at all hours of the day, and it’s okay! he still does his poorly timed winks but he insists they’re charming!

you begrudgingly agree

consider for a moment: going to get breakfast with this man. first of all, breakfast is probably his favorite meal, and he’s always adamant you get a good one (since being with geralt means no breakfast at all). jaskier talks like you haven’t seen him in years, despite living together, and he’s very big on holding your hand or bopping you on the nose. plus, he smiles.

oh! and his singing is 100%  contagious, so it doesn’t take long before you are singing around the house, and jaskier is just stunned at you,,,, you find him staring and roll your eyes at his ridiculousness, but this man is in love!!!! let him be in love!!!!

and you also talk to your plants, so you know jaskier picks that up, to. you’re a very vocal couple, lol.

AND FLUFF ENSUES.

-- taglist: @lenalxvegood, @cooloaflandhero, @swanimagines, @multifandomfix // message me if you want to be added!

[belit0]

@tinypaperwhispers​

Heyy! I love your blog so much, can't believe you don't have more followers!:o I wanted to ask a request, I didn't even see it on tumblr anywhere ever so i hope you'll like it:)). Could you do Madasaku and Izusaku headcanons?👀 both sfw and n*-fw. (I saw you also write about Sakura besides the Uchiha - i love these pairings💟) Thankks!

Thank you, beautiful! My blog is relatively new, so I’m growing by baby steps :) thanks for your support!!🧙🏻‍♀️🖤✨

MadaSaku [SFW]

These two had trouble getting along at first, just like two thick skulls! We know Madara for his awful temper, but nobody talks about Sakura’s as much as they should.

Being such a strong and independent woman, this kunoichi could never comply with the stereotype that this Uchiha is used to frequent. Having such a dominant character, he enjoys subduing others.

But when his path impacts her, everything takes a turn. She is not someone who will easily carry out his orders like anyone else, and this presents a challenge, something that intrigues him.

How did they end up together? Let’s say that, after the war, Madara survived, but his chakra paths were destroyed with the rise of Kaguya, so it is decided that he is no longer a threat, that he can be valuable to the village. Thus begins his rehabilitation, which Sakura has to take care of.

Before they realize it, they are dancing before a fire that grows between them, and there is no way to avoid it.

The relationship is quite balanced. Sakura compensates for all the mental health that Madara does not have lmao. No, but seriously.

Before his intensity, she is calm. In the face of his anger, she is the peace. In front of his tyranny, she is patient. They say that the opposites attract each other, don’t they? The best example is this couple.

Madara is a broken man, but Sakura helps him to recompose his soul piece by piece, to learn to love again, to see life with hope one more time.

He doesn’t trust anyone but her, so it’s not uncommon that their activities as a couple are all indoors.

Reading together in front of the fireplace with some tea, team cooking, cleaning the house together, training in the garden.

Because he was always very cultured, it is not strange to see him write down his knowledge on scrolls, which she then reviews and expresses her opinion on the subject in a lively debate.

Very occasionally, Madara accompanies Sakura to her work. Feeling rejected by the eyes of others about his person, he locks himself in her office until she ends the day, like a frightened cat in the presence of humans.

IzuSaku [SFW]

I have a very crazy idea of how this couple could have been formed, pay attention. After the final fight with Madara, Hashirama is aware that he is alive. At the same time, Tobirama finishes creating Edo Tensei. Both brothers decide that the only one who can make Madara see reason is Izuna, therefore, they revive him, and without manipulating him, they allow him a complete resurrection (breaking the Jutsu, as well as Madara in the war). They ask him to bring his brother to his senses and Izuna seeks him out to show him that he has come back to life. When he finds him (let us suppose that Madara developed the Rinnegan ahead of time and not just before he died) he believes that he is being deceived, and without being able to handle his new power yet, he sends his younger brother into the future = IzuSaku.

The Uchiha is upset, really upset. The one who killed him has just brought him to life, his brother is suffering and now he is in who knows where. But his bad predisposition changes when a pink-haired young woman appears in his sight.

What a curious, adorable, beautiful, and well-intentioned person. Sakura, her name suits him. Such beautiful eyes.

She is frightened by the symbol on his back, and it helps him to determine his situation. Time travel, change of periods. What a lovely woman, definitely her clan did not exist in the original time of Izuna, otherwise, he would remember such gorgeous features.

She decides to help him, and hiding him in her house is when their bond becomes closer.

Sakura had only interacted with one Uchiha in her life, and suddenly she cannot believe how affective the one that is now with her is. Love 24/7, the intensity of this clan is real.

Surprise hugs from behind, tender kisses on the neck at any moment, caresses on the face, arms, thighs.

Something that Sakura enjoys a lot is to comb Izuna’s hair after he gets out of the shower, usually, he falls asleep lying on her after a long time.

After a difficult day, he welcomes her at home with a good massage session, having become an expert in reading her body expressions to detect her mood.

Izuna lends himself as a test subject in Sakura’s work, he finds it very amusing. He loves to receive as much of her attention as possible.

When the kunoichi is working on a new poison, the Uchiha loves to sit near her workplace and observe her movements, her concentration, the effectiveness of her creation.

If Sakura has a very tough time today, Izuna refrains to make some tea for her and to support her with his company.

She loves the face he makes when she brings him sweets, after leaving work. His appetite for sugar… he’s like a child.

MadaSaku [NS-FW]

Fire in the room.

The fact that Madara no longer has a chakra does not mean that he has lost his unequaled strength.

Oh, but wait… Sakura has hers too.

The constant struggle for who dominates who, which brings a very funny dynamic when it comes to intimacy.

Sakura enjoys deeply when Madara holds her strongly against any surface, demonstrating his desire and need to be the one who leads.

The situation eventually turns around when she is too hot to his touch, and subdues him to her strength, forcing him to stay under her control.

This arouses Madara even more, who appreciates having a woman by his side who knows what she wants and fights for it.

Their sexual dynamics are overwhelming and devastates everything. Several tables had to be replaced after Sakura’s back hit them.

Madara had to fix different holes that he made in various walls with his fists while he held Sakura’s hips on his shoulders and devoured her pussy without mercy. The tugs in his hair that she supplies him with on each occasion make him lose his mind, and holding her in the air at his mercy pushes him to the limit.

Purple and greenish bruises decorate his thighs when she pays special attention to his limb with her mouth. Every time the Uchiha rushes his hips towards her face trying to get deeper into her throat, the kunoichi squeezes his legs, making he slows down and groans in pain.

Of course her aftercare includes healing the rudeness imparted upon her lover.

IzuSaku [NS-FW]

Thanks to being the object of research for Sakura, she is highly aware of all the visual abilities that Izuna possesses. That Sasuke was her partner does not mean that she knew the true extent of the Sharingan, the same applying to Kakashi.

The room of both soon fills with highly exciting and kinky games, where she is subjected to numerous Genjutsus from him, destined to make her reach her maximum pleasure peak constantly.

Izuna loves to capture Sakura’s glance during different moments of the day, trapping her surprisingly in his world of passion, making her scream until her body trembles in an uncontrollable way.

When he brings her back to reality, he laughs maliciously at the exhausted expression of the kunoichi, and carries her to the bed in his arms, where they both rest.

If Sakura wants to take revenge, she avoids looking him in the eyes and takes advantage of any moment of distraction to use the clear benefit that her strength gives her.

Sitting on his lap on the sofa, getting into the shower with him and pinning him against a wall, straddling him when they are in bed.

Izuna cannot fight her Taijutsu, and because the kunoichi learned to avoid his glance, he has no way of escaping the torture.

All that remains is to submit to the fiery touches with which Sakura enjoys teasing him, feeling his cock squirm at every touch.

Anyway, both also love soft, delicate, and romantic sex. They alternate their encounters between uncontrolled, passionate situations, adding sweetness and delicacy.

Feeling Izuna’s light kisses travel all over her body is something that drives her crazy, and while he pays special attention to her nipples, leaving slight marks, she massages her clit at a slow pace.

Before the sassy image of Sakura touching herself under him, the Uchiha cannot avoid imitating her, and moves his hand slowly over his member while he continues paying special attention to his lover.

When their bodies finally unite, the heat is too much, and it does not take them long to finish both at the same time. Their nights are eternal when they take their time praising each other in this peaceful way.

[magmahurricane]

Carey’s dad, Bernard! I gave him heterochromia based on my URL namesake, a childhood dog of mine named Pidgeon, who had one blue eye and one brown. 

Bio under cut! CW for descriptions of death, illness, and mentioned suicide! 

Name: Bernard Jess (Birth name: Ralph Ellis) Playlist: Here! (Spotify)

Age: 48 Occupation: Con artist Location: Varies; travels around Northamer in his RV Birthplace: Sand Blast City  Alignment: Chaotic Neutral 

Species: Dog (Based on tricolor Cavalier King Charles Spaniel) Sexuality: Bisexual

Personality: +Positives: Charismatic; Clever; Exuberant; Jolly; Optimistic; -Negatives: Conniving; Fraudulent; Cowardly; Selfish; Opportunistic A real “people person” at his core, Bernard knows exactly what to say to get people to drop their guard around him. Armed with his wit and a silver tongue, he picks his marks and runs his scams, playing his short cons and booking it at the first sign of trouble. While he isn’t shy about his lifestyle of lying, cheating and bullshitting his way through life, he does truly love his wife, and holds the memories of his mother and father close to his heart. Likes: Bluegrass; Country music; Whiskey; Swindling people; Dislikes: The law; working; his hometown; dwelling on the past; violence; hospitals  Hobbies: Acoustic guitar, fishing, storytelling, people-watching

Backstory (remember to heed the content warnings above!): 

 Born to Shirley and Maverick Ellis in the smog-filled, dome-covered rogues gallery known as Sand Blast City, Ralph had a fairly average childhood. While he attended school, his mother Shirly worked as a waitress in a dingy but well-known diner and his father, Maverick, worked the nearby mines. The Ellis family were very poor, and young Ralph often wore hand-me-downs and frequently struggled to keep up with his peers, making him a target for bullying. 

When Ralph was 9 years old, Maverick perished as the mine collapsed. Shirley took a second job in a desperate effort to both pay for his funeral, and provide for their son. Ralph found himself targeted by bullies even more, though found support from other children who lost family in the mines. Life went on, the Ellis’ struggling to make ends meet and cope with the death of Maverick. 

With no one to babysit, Ralph began heading into the diner after school, sitting at a booth and doing his homework. Over the years, he came to know its patrons, became familiar with its regulars and staff, and slowly began to master the art of people-watching. Ralph would sit, and listen, and watch these people - and got an earful of all the latest gossip. He learned that the man living in the apartment across had a nasty divorce and was a recovering alcoholic. The mother of one of his bullies was working the streets to keep food on the table. The stories of the neighborhood gambler, the old woman who also lost her son in the mines, the local politicians, of the baker who was having an affair, of the rich tourists who would make yearly stops in town - Ralph knew everyone. 

And just like that, school life had become easier. No one would dare cross Ralph Ellis, because Ralph had all the dirty laundry on everyone - kids were less keen on bullying him when he threatened to expose their families as drug addicts or whores, or when he could tear their family apart with news of an affair. It wasn’t long until Ralph realized the power he held over his peers, and began blackmailing them into doing favors, such as carrying his stuff, doing his homework, and buying him clothes -- for the first time in his life, Ralph was able to wear more than hand-me-downs from the local thrift store.  Life was starting to look up, and things were good.

Then it wasn’t. When Ralph was 15, his mother discovered she had cancer. They couldn’t afford treatment, and Shirley certainly couldn’t stop working her two jobs. Ralph took up a part-time job as a delivery boy, then a full-time job as Shirley’s condition worsened, dropping out of school to help. Within a year, she passed away. 

And suddenly, at the tender age of 16, Ralph found himself orphaned, and within a few months, homeless. Despite everything - his father working his whole life and dying in those rotten mines, his mother taking two jobs, and Ralph himself giving up his education and taking up work - the Ellis family just couldn’t get ahead. Honest work didn’t pay. But he remembered coasting along in school, being able to pull peoples strings and manipulate others into working for him. He remembered the woes and weaknesses of the people around him. In a dog-eat-dog world, Ralph was determined to make his mark and make the most of the lemons life gave him. 

Then, when Ralph was 19, a great plague swept over Sand Blast City. People were dying in the streets, and even more were panicking, desperate for a way to save themselves. Ralph saw an opportunity - his customers already trusted him, and he’d made it this far. It was time for his biggest, and riskiest, con yet. With a few local herbs, clean water, and a bit of cheap cold medicine, Ralph began marketing his miracle potion, promising immunity from the plague. With help from his silver tongue and the trust of the locals, the potions flew off the shelves. Ralph made more money than ever, and was, briefly, toted as a local hero. He knew he should have packed up shop and gotten the hell outta dodge, but he wanted to milk this operation for all it was worth. He stayed, intending to make and sell more of his miracle tonics… 

And then, the plague got him. 

 The virus wracked Ralph’s body. For days, he lay by his wagon, delirious with high fever, struggling for breath, believing this would surely be his end -- and it almost was. Family of his customers tracked him down, furious that their loved ones weren’t protected as advertised. They beat the sickly con artist, and left him at death's door.

Ralph survived by the skin of his teeth, although not unscathed; as if a reminder of his treachery and what he’d done, his lungs were ruined, leaving him athsmatic, with a persistent cough and physically frail. But Ralph was nothing if not determined - as soon as he was well enough, he high-tailed it out of Sand Blast City.

Ralph would spend the next 5 years as a vagabond con-artist, selling cheap or bootlegged wares, which he either stole from yard sales or breaking and entering homes, pulling cat-in-a-bag cons and change raising, and continuing with his snake-oil salesman act. He often found himself being chased out of town, or on the run from local bounty hunters for crossing the wrong people. He also began using different names, switching his alias every few months or every year. 

Then his life was changed when he stumbled into the Southern Baronies; an uppity, bountiful region famous for its large chao gardens and wine exports. It was then he met Margaret Blanche, one of Josiah Blanche’s daughters.

The Blanche’s were a prestigious family, renowned for their famous vineyard and exports, as well as owning the land upon which the Chao Garden was located. They were filthy rich, and acted the part -- which may be precisely why when Ralph, under the name ‘Bernard Jess’ - showed up, Margaret was smitten. ‘Bernard’ was exciting; he was handsome, charismatic, entertaining, funny, and judging by the stories he told the Blanche family, he led quite an adventurous life. Margaret had grown so bored of her life and wanted what Bernard had. Likewise, Bernard wanted what the Blanche’s had - their lavish lifestyle and money. He had come to them with the intention of robbing them blind, but found himself enamored with Margaret.

Josiah, of course, didn’t approve. He forbade the young couple from seeing one another, and had Bernard escorted from the property, deciding the young man wasn’t good enough for his daughter. Bernard knew he couldn’t really do anything about it, and focused on his cons with the other families in the Baronies. He and Margaret occasionally crossed paths during this time, and the two would spend time together in secret. Margaret fell more and more in love with the whimsy and rebellious attitude Bernard had towards life, and when it came time for Bernard to leave the Baronies, Margaret ran away with him

Life on the run together was golden. The two of them staged robberies, worked cons, and had made a small name for themselves. However, within a year, things suddenly took a turn when Margaret realized she had become pregnant. Fearing for her future, she pleaded with Bernard to take her back to the Baronies -- this had been great fun, but she was already tired of living off meager meals and on the run, and the pregnancy scared her. She wasn’t cut out for Bernard’s lifestyle, but promised him that upon returning, they would marry and he would join the Blanche family proper, and be able to leave this life behind.

And so they returned to the Baronies… Only to be humiliated by Josiah and the rest of the Blanches as they sneered and mocked and chastised Margaret for her stupid naivete and revealed that during her year-long romp with Bernard, they’d completely disowned her. Margaret, Bernard, nor their unborn child would see a penny of the Blanche fortune, nor were they even allowed on the property. Margaret was disgraced, disowned and suddenly, for the first time in her life, left with absolutely nothing. She was terrified and heartbroken, and all Bernard could do was be a shoulder to cry on - while knowing all too well this was his fault. 

Bernard managed to make a very small arrangement with Josiah to make things just a little easier; on the very edge of the Baronies, hidden out of sight so as to not tarnish the view of the Chao Gardens and beautiful manors, was a small trailer park known as Barrow Creek. Bernard convinced Josiah to at the very least buy them a small plot of land, allow them to set up a RV to live in so Margaret could, at the very least, have a roof over her head. Josiah agreed, and the young couple moved into their new home.

Carey was born that year.

Margaret hadn’t wanted the child; as far as she was concerned, this was more Carey’s fault than Bernard’s. It didn’t help that Carey had been born with a defect - her left arm hadn’t formed past the shoulder. The baby was weak, requiring constant care and attention, and oh, how Margaret wished to smother the life from it and be done with this burden.

It was only on Bernard’s insistence that Carey was kept alive and fed; already, he was scheming how to make the most out of the situation. He felt nothing towards his daughter but inspiration -- he could make this work to his advantage. A disabled child would bring out the sympathy in people, making his cons go a lot smoother. People would give money out of pity or adoration for the disadvantaged family, he could spin a thousand sob stories about how she lost her arm, open donations to go towards putting her in school or getting her a prosthetic - in reality keeping the money for himself - and the possibilities for profit were endless.

For much of her infancy and childhood, Carey was toted around during Bernard’s many schemes, helping rake in donations from charitable and kind people. As she got older, Bernard got Carey more and more involved in his cons, reciting lines with her and having her partake in more elaborate schemes. He also taught her the art of picking pockets, breaking locks, lying, and stealing. By age 7, Carey was doing all this and more, being made to cook and clean and was expected to earn her keep for living with them, with Bernard making sure she understood that she was a financial burden unto her parents, all while using his charisma and manipulation to keep her adoring him.

However, during all of this, Margaret’s mental health was declining. 

Gone was the bright, sheltered woman who wanted a life of risk and adventure - Margaret was bitter, angry, and jealous… but never directed any of it towards her husband, instead taking it out on their daughter and anyone else unfortunate enough to cross her path. She spent most of the day drunk and unhappy, or waiting for Bernard to return when he’d drive with Carey out of town to run a con. 

Bernard was oblivious, for a time - and when he did become aware, he tried to ignore the problem. The rising tension between Margaret and Carey, Margaret’s drinking problem, and their growing debt were all things he tried to brush off, even as Margaret attempted to drown Carey out of jealousy for her spending so much time with Bernard.

By the time Carey was 10, the Baronies were no longer safe for the Jess family. People had wisened up to their act, the bounty hunters were closing in, as was the law. Desperate to get some cash for the road ahead, Bernard conspired to rob the Blanche’s estate. It would be a final sendoff, the last big gig before the Jess family laid low for a long time. Margaret was eager to reclaim what she’d left behind, but Carey had grown ill from neglect. She was sick with pneumonia, and thus sluggish and of little help - and so Bernard put her on guard duty, to keep an eye out if the cops or other signs of trouble appeared. 

The heist didn’t quite go as planned.

In the end, the cops were called, and Bernard had shot and killed Josiah in an altercation. As Bernard and Margaret fled the scene, they left behind Carey purposefully, knowing the cops would stop for the small, sickly child. This allowed the couple to make a clean getaway, while ridding themselves of Carey’s burden. 

It has now been 13 years since that day. 

Bernard’s working alone now, with Margaret having taken her own life a few years ago. He carries that weight with him, knowing full well he ruined her life and that his neglect led to her deteriorating mental health. He still wears their wedding band, and insists on remaining loyal to her memory, though he does oftentimes feel lonely. 

It’s difficult to pin where Bernard is at any given moment, as his cons often see him travelling all over Northamer. He’s still running his cons, hoping for that one big break and dodging bounty hunters and cops at every corner, keeping his past and his regrets close to his heart and hidden under lock and key.

[imnotevenhere9]

If you're still doing Matchups, could I please get one for Lotr and The Hobbit please? Thanks so much!

🌱 She/They Nonbinary // Bisexual // Autistic and Chronically Ill with a bonus Anxiety Disorder // 18 years old at the moment

🌱 I know a lot of Home Remedies and Superstitions for like no reason. For instance, did you know that Raspberry Tea helps with Menstrual Pain, or that knocking on wood invokes the protection of the tree spirit and that’s why it’s said to give you luck? I don’t know why I know that, but I do.

🌱 Winning a fight is on my bucket list, but it has to be for a good reason. I’m not one to just pick fights for the sake of fighting, and I’m actually pretty conflict-averse, so I need to actually have a solid reason for throwing hands. But I’ve always wanted to do it for some reason.

🌱 I often get the inexplicable urge to bake something, so my loved ones just kinda end up with surprise brownies and zucchini bread at random. This habit has only worsened over Quarantine, of course.

🌱 I really like studying Witchcraft for some reason. The first spell I ever performed was a Healing Spell to help my friend who was sick with Crohn's Disease. Thirty minutes after performing the ritual, I got a text saying he felt a lot better and he was released from the hospital a couple days later, so I guess it must’ve worked. 😁

🌱 My love language is definitely gift giving. I’m pretty cheap, but I’m also an artist, so when push comes to shove I’ll just make something for someone when I like them. I pay very close attention to what people like because it gives me more ideas on how to interact with them. I’m essentially a large, flightless Crow. You were nice, so you get something shiny. But though I like giving gifts to others, I’m not very materialistic at all. I prefer to be practical when it comes to things, and I get very nervous when spending money.

🌱 I LOVE going outside and getting messy. Playing in the mud, getting soaked in the rain, I’m the type to go outside and come back home covered in dirt and twigs. It’s just really fun to me.

🌱My Dad’s a really good cook and I seem to have inherited that gene. He actually has me make dinner whenever we’re having eggs because I always cook them better than he does.

🌱 I’ve always wanted to be a really good gardener. My dream house is just covered in flowers and plants and such. I want to live in a Greenhouse, basically.

🌱 I have a habit of giggling to myself just by remembering something funny that happened, even if it was a couple years ago. I also laugh when I do something stupid, because I find my flaws and shortcomings funny for the most part. I love to laugh with people, but never at them.

🌱 You know the sort of “Girl Next Door” trope? That’s my type. Like the guy in the dorm just down the hall, or the girl in my neighborhood who I casually flirt with. I’m a sucker for cute little interactions like that, so it’s not too much of a surprise that I always fall for people like that. I never forget people I meet on the road, and often find myself hoping to meet up with them again someday.

🌱 I know way too much about Spirits and Fae. My favorite book is called ‘The Encyclopedia of Spirits’ and it shows you how to contact and interact with a ton of different deities and spirits, and I’m addicted to reading it. It’s the best.

🌱 I’m basically like a tiny, less-impressive Aragorn. I love travelling on foot, getting messy outside, I was kind of a Horse Girl as a kid ngl, I’ve always wanted to be a knight or king of some sort, chances are that I haven’t bathed in awhile, and I too would pine for a hot elf girl for literal years on end.

🌱 I always have to have some sort of weight on me to feel comfortable, because of my Autism. That usually takes the form of a large backpack stuffed with books and snacks, or a big jacket. However, my muscles are always pretty stiff and achy, so that does kinda backfire too.

🌱My closest friends say I give off “Dwobbit” vibes. That’s a ½ Dwarf and ½ Hobbit btw. I’m around 4’ 10” tall, I don’t shave, I love crafting and art, I live in the Mountains, I’m tomboyish but I also love gardening and can be a bit of a homebody, I love going barefoot, etc.

🌱 I really love History, Folklore, Mythology and Fairy Tales. My favorite is the Irish myth of Oisín in Tir Na Nog. Look it up if you don’t know it, it’s a fantastic story. But I also appreciate myths from all sorts of different cultures, like the myth of Annapurna in India or the tale of Princess Kaguya in Japan. Did you know that in Mesopotamian Mythology, Nonbinary People were said to be given the gift of prophecy and magic by the goddess Ishtar? And that a recurring figure in Slavic Folklore is the Snake King, who’s just a big ol’ snake with a doofy looking crown? I love it.

🌱 I’m an Aquarius, INFP and 4w5 if that means anything. For reference, characters who are also 4w5 INFPs include Lydia Deetz (Beetlejuice), Wirt (Otgw), Frankenstein’s Monster, Luna Lovegood (HP), Napstablook (Undertale), The Phantom of the Opera, and Celeste from Animal Crossing. That kinda tells you a lot about me, doesn’t it?

🌱 I’ve been growing my hair out, so it’s getting pretty long too. It’s always messy, and I both use a lot of conditioner and it naturally curls when wet, so I basically end up having a very fluffy mane with a lot of stray hairs and weird curls. Also, fun fact, I never learned how to braid because I’ve only really made friends with boys and I have very poor hand-eye coordination when it comes to such things. And my hair is so thin and fluffy that it’s impossible to tame anyways, so the best I can do is put it in a ponytail, since I’m basically incapable of doing anything fancier than that. When worst comes to worse, I have plenty of hats though.

🌱 I have really pale skin that’s always covered in moles, freckles (especially on my arms) and lots of scabs. It’s also getting warmer out, so chances are that I have a farmer’s tan. I have blue eyes and glasses.

🌱 I have a habit of seeing shadows move out of the corners of my eyes, frequently mistaking them for people or animals, but when I turn to look there’s nothing there. I’ve gotten my eyesight checked multiple times, but there’s nothing out of the ordinary, so it’s either a lack of sleep, or the Fae are getting antsy with me. Probably the former of course, but part of me would like to believe the

Oof, sorry that description was so long! I really hope you don't mind. Thanks so much in advance!!

A/n: I made it really wholesome (at least in my eyes), so I hope you like it! ^_^

Masterlist • Prompts • S/o match ups • Taglist

S/o from The Hobbit: Kili! 

will take your hands and kiss all the moles and freckles when you two are alone

listens to you talking about Fairy Tales while hugging you from behind and plays with your hair

likes to fall asleep with you on his chest, so he can plent small kisses on your head

loves everything you bake, it doesn’t matter if he heard of it or not, he always gets so excited to try what you baked

gives the best massages. He will prepare a bubble bath, help you stretch, whatever makes your achy muscles hurt less

small peaks behind your shoulder when you're

S/o from LOTR: Arwen!

adores your hair. Like literally. She loves to braid them, brush them, run her fingers through them, basically everything you can think of

please share everything you know and learnes about Home Remedies and Superstitions. She loves listening to you talk, it doesn't matter if she already knows all of it, she just wants to listen to you talk about it

your random giggles? In her eyes the cutest thing ever. Just hearing you giggling brightens her day so much

will probably go outside and get messy with you, because she loves to see you happy

gets shy when you give her gifts, she loves them all so much tho

will get you different books about Witchcraft, so you can learn and practice more!

[ineloqueent]

Starstruck: Epilogue

Brian May x Fem!Reader

This is the epilogue of a multi-part fic. Click the links below to read the Masterpost, or the previous part of the fic :)

Masterpost / Part 19

Summary: When studying at Imperial College in the 1970s, your path is crossed by a beautiful boy as much in love with the stars as you.  

Warnings: N/A; there’s not even swearing what the hell

Historical Inaccuracies: N/A

Word Count: 2.2k

⁺˚*·༓☾ ☽༓･*˚⁺

Madison Square Garden, New York, United States, 1st of December, 1977

Years could pass— years would pass— and yet the feeling would forever remain the same. The rush, the pure and simple thrill of music and theatrics. Queen performing. You would never get tired of it.

Never get tired of Freddie’s flourishes and dramatic spins, John’s little dance moves that were becoming more frequent and less shy, Roger’s funny faces and showing off with those incredible falsettos, Brian’s look of concentration through a guitar solo, and the smile that broke it when you caught his eye from the wings.

The huddled conversations before a show, the raging parties afterward that you and Brian would often sneak out from, halfway through, because there were stars and comets and Perseids and planetary alignments to be seen.

You never missed an astronomical event.

Brian had bought a little notebook specifically for the two of you to mark such things in, and it was with a giddy smile that you’d toss him the notebook on a day where he’d forgotten what would be happening in the night sky, and watch him light up as he read your note.

He had also adopted a new tradition, it appeared, leaving you polaroids you hadn’t known he’d taken— in the backpocket of the bell bottom trousers you’d laid out to wear the next day, between the pages of whatever novel you were currently reading, on your pillow alongside a bouquet of wildflowers.

You’d never met anyone like Brian, who, for all his absent-mindedness, was ceaselessly thoughtful when it mattered.

Except today.

It would seem that all logic had been thrown out the window today.

But that was fair enough, you thought, because Queen were to be playing at Madison Square Garden.

And Brian’s parents would be there to watch.

He was fretting about that fact, it was obvious. He’d walked around all day wringing his hands and chewing on his lip, pacing, chattering, at moments falling entirely silent. He’d even forgotten to bring his guitar with him when Queen had stepped onstage for the afternoon’s soundcheck.

The problem was that Brian hadn’t had the time to see his parents earlier on in the day, and wouldn’t get to do so before the show, because they were arriving in the city only half an hour prior to the concert.

“Sit down, Brian,” said Roger finally, and Brian fell back into the chair beside you, completely on autopilot.

You reached out for his hand, and he took it without a thought, grasping a little too tightly. As he worried at his bottom lip with his teeth, you rubbed circles into the back of his hand with the pad of your thumb.

“Have a cuppa, darling,” Freddie said. He stopped in the act of painting his toenails with a sparkly varnish in order to hand you the cup of tea that John had just poured.

In turn, you handed the cup to Brian, but only seconds after he’d taken the first sip of tea, the cup crashed to the ground and shattered into a thousand little pieces, tea splattering all over his white shoes.

“Oh, you klutz,” Freddie sighed. “That was one of our only good cups. The only one without a chip.”

Uncharacteristically, Brian immediately mumbled an apology, rising from his seat.

“Well, at least it won’t have a chip now,” you joked, and Brian smiled weakly.

Deacy pointed a finger at the two of you. “Don’t move,” he said. “You’ll only crush it more.”

You nodded, and a broom was passed amongst those outside of the warzone of porcelain, the mess quickly cleared.

Your hand found a place in Brian’s hair and you dragged your fingers soothingly through his curls until he sighed and stopped fidgeting for long enough to take a deep breath.

“Right,” said Gerry Stickells, Queen’s current tour manager. “Time to go, if everything is in order?”

Three nods, one quip from Freddie: “Brian’s nerves aren’t in order, but I don’t suppose anyone can fix that.”

His remark was met with silence, so everyone rose from their seats and followed Uncle Grumpy— because that was Gerry’s nickname— toward the wings of the stage.

You kept a hold of Brian’s hand as though the two of you were assured partners in crime and this was your mission— to make it to the stage and through the show without a mishap precipitated by nerves.

You journeyed successfully to the wings, and released Brian’s hand so that he and the others could go and get geared up for the show, offering him a reassuring smile which he accepted with a terse nod.

Then the house lights came up, and Freddie proffered the masses of crew and family his signature wink, Roger gave an experimental twirl of his drumsticks, and John kissed his wife, her belly, and Robert goodbye, because they had come along on tour this time.

Brian was last, as usual, and took his time in leaving you, more reluctant than ever, reasoning that if he did not go onstage, there would be nothing for his father to critique. You shut him up with a kiss and pushed him onto stage, reasoning that if he never went, he’d never know the outcome of the night.

You were a little nervous yourself, as the show began, because you had not met Brian’s parents before and would be meeting them for the first time on this occasion. But your worries would scarcely have helped Brian with his, so you’d kept your peace.

But then there was a scuffle amongst the wings, and you halted in your half-conversation with Veronica, because Crystal was stepping aside to let an older couple through to the front of the wings.

Brian’s parents.

Veronica squeezed your arm reassuringly, and to your dismay, shuffled over to view the concert by Gerry’s side, in place of yours.

Glancing over at Brian’s parents, who, despite Brian’s fears, looked eager to see their son perform, you decided to approach them and introduce yourself.

You gave a little wave, catching the attention of Mrs. May, a woman with curling hair who smiled briefly but radiantly in your direction before touching a hand to her husband’s elbow. She reminded you very much of her son.

You made your way over during one of Freddie’s speeches, stretching out your hand to shake those of the two Mays.

“Hi,” you said, “I’m Y/N Andrews.”

“Y/N,” Ruth May smiled again, “we’ve heard so much about you.”

You fought the urge to wring your hands precisely as Brian had been doing earlier on, electing instead to main eye contact like the civilised person you were pretending to be.

You laughed, knowing how much of an automaton you sounded, but scrambling desperately to cover up your nervousness. “All good, I hope.”

Harold May, it seemed, had the same pensive dimension to his personality as did his son, and spoke only now. “Of course. He speaks very fondly of you.” His voice had a slow, careful quality to it, every word embossed with intention, and you flushed, because you were now sure that Brian did speak very fondly of you.

You were lost in your thoughts a moment, and when you returned, you did not know what to say. You settled for, “It’s so nice to finally meet you, Mr. May, Mrs. May.”

“And you, dear. Call me Ruth, please, else you’ll make me feel old!” she chuckled, and you suddenly realised from where it was that Brian had acquired his gift for always making others feel welcome in his company.

Brian’s dad nodded to you. “Harold,” he said, in conjunction with his wife’s remark. You got the impression that he was a man of few words, but then again, like father, like son. It would seem that Brian drew much from his parents. From stars came stardust.

The next song began, and a guitar riff harmonised with voices sent a shock of electricity down your spine. Queen was always good, but tonight they were especially good. Ruth and Harold May had picked a good show to attend.

You looked on in silence as Queen ran seamlessly through their setlist, your heart nearly bursting with pride by the time Brian perched on the stool, his acoustic guitar poised on his knee as Freddie joined him, lit up by a singular spotlight that might as well have been moonlight.

“This is ‘Love of My Life.’”

You couldn’t stop yourself from turning to Brian’s parents. “What they do,” you said, “it’s magic. I’ve never seen or heard anything like it.” You shook your head slightly as you returned your eyes to the stage. “And Brian. He has this sway, which you don’t notice at first, because he keeps to himself, but then he begins to speak, or play, or sing, and it’s like space bends around him.”

You knew you were rambling, but you couldn’t help it. If you did nothing in this life but to convey to Harold May just how proud he should be of his son, then it would still all have been worth it.

It wasn’t Ruth who spoke up this time.

“I understand that now.”

And there was Harold May, with tears in his eyes at the sight of his son, the musician. Not the astrophysicist, but the musician.

It was abundantly clear to you that Harold May was as proud of this part of his son as he was of any, of every, part of his son.

And it was clear to everyone in the wings that this was it— this was the moment.

Queen had made it. They had actually made it.

The world was theirs for the taking.

⁺˚*·༓☾ ☽༓･*˚⁺

The sight you were met with upon leaving the wings was not one you had expected.

You had not expected to find Heather Dersch, of all people, hugging Roger Taylor so tightly that both parties were practically blue in the face.

And when she saw you, she gave a cry and rushed forward, throwing her arms around your shoulders.

“I’m sorry, Y/N. I’m so sorry.”

Wordlessly, you returned her embrace, because in your head, you had already half-forgiven her.

“It was never about you,” she murmured. “It was about me feeling insecure and sorry for myself, and I envied you for having it all together.”

You couldn’t help the laughter that bubbled up in your throat. “Wherever did you get that idea?”

She shook her head as she pulled away from you, sniffling slightly and pawing away the hair that stuck to her tear-streaked face. “I don’t know,” she sighed. “After I came back home, I went up North and talked to my parents.”

You nodded in understanding; she’d fallen out of contact with them for a while.

“And it helped,” Heather went on. “So now I’m here to apologise for the way that I left, and for what I said to you, because you didn’t deserve that.” She looked down. “You don’t deserve that. But we’ve always been such good friends, and I was hoping…” Her usual demeanour of stubborn defiance returned as she met your eyes. But her tone was still softened by emotion. “I was hoping you might forgive me..?”

You rolled your eyes, pulling her back into the hug. “I’ve done so many stupid things in my life, and I won’t let losing you be one of them.”

When you drew away from Heather again, she smiled.

“My love,” Brian’s voice reached you from nearby, “where was I when you did all of these stupid things?” He kissed your cheek, and you spun to face him as his arms encircled you. “You’re perfect,” he whispered, and you thought your heart would burst.

A noise of disgust announced Roger’s presence, and the subsequent cackle Freddie’s.

Quite suddenly, you and Brian were surrounded by a flock of both crew and family, with Deacy chasing Robert around the room as Veronica laughed.

“Brian.”

Brian’s eyes widened, and his lips fell parted before he turned at the sound of his father’s voice.

“Dad,” he said, his hesitance evident in the way the word caught in his throat like he wasn’t aware whether or not he still held the right to say it. It was rather sweet how much regard he still held for the opinion of his parents, even at the largely independent age of 30.

“I understand.”

His father said nothing more. He did not have to say anything more, because Brian understood too.

For all the world, he finally understood that he was enough. Understood that he was enough for you, for his parents, for himself.

And as he embraced his family— you, his parents, Roger, Freddie, John— you stared up at the ethereal being that was Brian May and understood something too.

Years could pass— years would pass— and yet the feeling would forever remain the same.

Never in your life, never, would you stop being starstruck.

THE END

⁺˚*·༓☾ ☽༓･*˚⁺

A/N: i cannot avoid being sappy about this, so here we go. 

thank you to

@hgmercury39​ & @pi-kai-sso​ for being here since literally the beginning (of time?)!

@imcompletelylost​​ for repeatedly complimenting my dialogue-writing, and for being enthusiastic about the gang going to a disco!!

@brianmays-hair​ for binge reading the first many parts, completely unprompted, and for live-blogging every! single! chapter! after that. also, for making the best memes, and for being excited for saturdays 💞

@joemazzmatazz​ for spending her work shift binging starstruck, and thereafter, for all of her lovely live-blogs 💕

@doing-albri​ for complimenting the ‘magic’ of starstruck, so many times, and for making an edit??? inspired by starstruck??? take my love.

@archaicmusings​​ for… um... everything. live-blogs, tagging me in stuff that reminded her of starstruck, general friendship, support. ily!!!

@deacyblues​ for her never-ending kindness about my talents 🥺 💘

@aprilaady​​ for binge-reading the first many parts of this, for also tagging me in stuff that reminded her of starstruck, and for making me smile with all her live-blogs 🥰

@mazzell-ro​​ for her wonderful comments and general support! 💗

and to everyone who has supported me throughout the writing of this. i never thought i would even publish starstruck, but here we are!

i’m gonna go have an existential crisis now lmao

taglist: @melting-obelisks​ @cxllianmurphy​ @hgmercury39​ @topsecretdeacon @joemazzmatazz​ @perriwiinkle​ @brianmays-hair​ @im-an-adult-ish​ @ilikebigstucks​ @doing-albri​ @killer-queen-87​ @n0-self-c0ntro1​ @archaicmusings​ @cloudyyspace​ @annina-96​ @themarchoftherainbowqueen​ @annajolras​ @mazzell-ro​ @aprilaady​ @themtvcrib​ @the-great-imagines-of-1812​

Masterpost / Part 19

[puckbuddies]

You set off fireworks in my mind

Mat Barzal x reader

3166 words

Warnings: swear words probably and the reader is drinking alcohol. I think this fic is pretty gender neutral but if it isn’t, please tell me so I can edit it to be :)

Your first contact with the hockey world was actually in a random grocery store in New York. You were just going about your day, trying to find the cookies your roommate had asked you to get when a guy practically fell in your shopping cart. The guy, accompanied by his friend who at this point was almost in tears from laughing too hard, introduced himself as Anthony Beauvillier when you helped him get of the ground. Having lived in New York for a couple of years, you recognized him as a hockey players and made a joking comment about his clumsiness which set his friend that you didn’t recognize off again. After making sure that he wasn’t hurt, you stayed to talk for a bit longer.

Your talk had been cut short by your roommate calling to complain that the cookies took too long. You had left the store with Anthony’s phone number and a funny story to tell your friends.

From that day on, you talked to Anthony frequently. You figured out your campus was pretty close to his apartment complex so he often asked you to take care of his apartment when he was on a road trip. You couldn’t complain as it gave you a quiet place to study when your roommate had friends over.

A couple of weeks after meeting him, you were officially introduced to the rest of the team during an aftergame bar visit. It took about the whole night to convince everyone you weren’t actually dating, rather just friends.

You usually just hung out with Anthony separately from the team. You spend most of your evenings in your room writing papers and stressing over tests so it was sometimes difficult to make it to any games. You mostly saw each other during lunch breaks in between your classes and after his morning practice. 

At first it was just you two, but after a while Mat Barzal joined in on your almost weekly tradition. You met Mat when you met the rest of the team and he seemed like a nice guy. Meeting him for lunch when he didn’t have any alcohol to give him some liquid courage was a little awkward at first. It wasn’t like you didn’t get along, it was just different. You didn’t really know him yet and weren’t the biggest fan of small talk. Fortunately, Tito was there to think of topics to include you both in the conversation.

The first time you hung out with Mat specifically was in Vancouver. You had went back to your hometown for the summer break deciding you wanted to see your parents again. You were tanning in your back garden when you got an Instagram dm from Mat asking you if you wanted to join him and some friends at their lake house. While you were surprised, you did agree to go. You didn’t really consider Mat a friend back then seeing as you only talked when Tito was also present but you didn’t have a good reason not to go. So you went, and it was fun. You met some of Mat’s hockey friends that he trained with in the offseason and you saw a different side to him.

He looked so relaxed, leaning on the paddle board you were sitting on. That was the first time you really talked to Mat. You got to know him a lot better that summer. Now that you realised you lived about twenty minutes form where he was residing, he invited you to more gatherings with his friends.

Coming back to New York after that summer was nice. You got to see Anthony again after about three months and you now had a genuine friendship with Mat as well. You went to more team outings and were slowly being accepted in the group.

It was a couple of months later when things started to get a little weird. Lately, the lines of your relationship with Mat were blurring. Instead of playing it cool, Mat had started to become a little flirty. You on the other hand had opted to ignore his comments. You had a feeling Mat knew you were avoiding the topic but didn’t want to make you feel uncomfortable, so he stayed quiet. The comments stopped after a while when he realised you weren’t going to react to them.

It wasn’t like you didn’t like Mat. You weren’t blind and could obviously see that he was attractive. You got along great and shared a lot of interests. It was just the fact that he was a hockey player.

You knew about the reputation these guys seemed to have and while you didn’t believe Mat to be the type to cheat on his significant other, you couldn’t be one hundred percent sure. Besides that, you weren’t too keen on having a boyfriend who was only in New York half of the time.

It would be the smartest decision to just stay friends. Imagine if you ever broke up. It would cause a tension in the group and you would lose a lot of friends.

But there was a part of your brain that didn’t agree. It was the part of your brain that didn’t believe in rational thoughts. The part that made your heartbeat speed up whenever Mat came too close to you making the scent of his cologne a little too strong. The part that still wanted him to hug you at random times in the day.

Now, one year after you spent your summer with Mat, you were back in Vancouver. This time for a festival you had never even heard of. Apparently, it would be a mix of country and pop and while you couldn’t exactly picture how much you were going to enjoy the music, you weren’t going to pass up the opportunity. Tito was going to be there, as well as Mat and some of their other hockey friends that you had also met last year, and you invited some of your friends from high school. While you had no idea who was in the line-up, you were very excited for the upcoming week.

You arrived the night before the festival started to try and get settled in for the next day. Setting up your tent in the dark was proving to be harder that you thought but luckily, you had enough help from your friends.

When all of the tents were set up, your group settled around the campfire that Josty had ever so nicely started for you. You couldn’t have asked for a better night. Seeing your friends for the first time in however long gave you a burst of energy. For the first time in a while, you felt completely de-stressed. Sitting around a fire, drinking cheap beer with the people you loved was everything you needed at that moment.

Well, maybe everything but a little heat. You thought you’d hidden your goosebumps quite well but apparently you weren’t very good at being subtle. You had no idea when Mat had noticed but after a couple of minutes you felt him shift next to you. Your cheeks lit up when you felt the soft material of his jumper being pulled over your head. Not having the energy to fight it, you decided to just ignore the butterflies in your stomach. You were drunk and cold and those felt like perfect excuses to you.

When you woke up the next day and went over what happened the night before, you made a pact with yourself. You were going to have to figure out your feelings for Mat and if you wanted to do this properly, you couldn’t leave anything to chance. Seeing as your feelings seemed to increase to double their size when you were drunk, you had to stay sober for the rest of the festival.

If for some reason the butterflies in your stomach still appeared in the following week -which you convinced yourself they wouldn’t-, it would be clear to you that you would have to face Mat and tell him the truth. You had no idea if Mat even still felt any attraction to you. He definitely did at one point, but after you ignored every single one of his advances, it was very likely he had already moved on anyways.

But you had no reason to worry about any of that, because you didn’t have feelings.

You went through the first day of the festival totally convinced you were fine. The only time you felt your heartbeat pick up was when Mat gave you a hug as he came out of his tent in the morning.

Throughout the day, Mat was mostly distracted by his friends that had come along while you were pulled in a different direction by your own friends. You got a couple of weird looks when you announced that you wouldn’t be drinking anymore but in the end, no one questioned you.

The next day was when you realised you were screwed. Mat had realised he hadn’t talked to you basically at all the day before and made an effort to stay by your side. You assured him you were fine hanging out with some of the girls but he was having none of it. Mat was stubborn and you didn’t want to be suspicious by pushing him away so you let him pull you into his side.

At this point, you were mostly just annoyed with yourself. Deep down, you had always know you had feelings for Mat, you just didn’t want to admit it. Maybe you were insecure and thought you didn’t have a chance with him. Maybe you just didn’t want to risk your friendship.

But you seriously couldn’t even last two days?

You had tried so hard to convince yourself that your feelings for Mat were just drunken whims but you couldn’t escape the truth anymore.

So you made your mind up. Honouring the promise you made to yourself, the next day, you would tell Mat how you felt, you just had to find the right way to go about it.

You saw your chance right before everyone was about to head to the main stage to watch what was apparently going to be the best performance of the festival. People were tired from the night before so the atmosphere was calmer than it had been up until this point.

“Mat can you come help me with something?” You hoped your voice didn’t betray how nervous you felt and you hoped your question came across casual enough to not attract the attention of Mat’s friends.

With a quick yeah sure, you and Mat were on your way to a quiet spot to talk.

“What’s up, you seem kind of nervous.”

Straight to the point. You kind of hoped you could ease yourself into this conversation but alas.

“No um, I’m fine. I just have a question.”

Mat looked at you expectantly and you almost got distracted by how cute he looked at that moment.

“I wanted to thank you for inviting me. I’m having a lot of fun seeing everyone again.”

Daring to look up at Mat, you saw that he was smiling up at you from where he was seated but there was still a hint of uncertainty in his eyes.

“Well, the music could be better but it’s not the worst.” You were full on stalling at this point. You stopped for a moment and took a deep breath to hopefully continue the rest of your speech in one piece nut you found you couldn’t. nerves completely took over your body and you felt like you couldn’t talk at all.

Mat saw this and pulled you to him.

“Y/n what’s up?” he said it so gentle that it almost brought tears to your eyes. You took one last deep breath and decided to go for it. Now or never. “Mat I li-“.

But you couldn’t finish your sentence. Not because of your nerves this time, but because Dante Fabbro had just rounded the corner and was calling for you to join the group. Cursing yourself for ruining your chance you stepped away from Mat. You send him a smile and assured him you could talk about it later. Mat didn’t look convinced but you were already on your way to the rest of the group, your body practically shaking from how close you had been.

The universe decided that today just wasn’t your day. You tried to get Mat alone again, but with no success. The music was too loud and the field too crowded and have a decent conversation.

At least Mat seemed to be having fun. He was screaming along to the music, balancing on Tito’s shoulders. They were definitely too drunk to be doing that but you just let them have their fun knowing better than anyone how stressful the previous season had been for them.

The next day you woke up in good spirits. You absolutely had to tell Mat how you felt by the end of the day. But just like the previous day, it was hard to get him alone. You had never really noticed how Mat liked to be surrounded by his friends at all times but it annoyed you to no ends. At one point, you even stared at him for about three minutes trying to send him the telepathic message you needed to talk to him.

By dinnertime, you were absolutely done waiting. Having lost all your patience for being subtle, you practically dragged him away to your tent. Your action was accompanied by hollers from your friends that you tried your hardest to ignore.

“Woah what is happening right now?”. It was said in between laughs. The look on Mat’s face told you he was amused but you could tell he had no idea what was happening.

“Nothing. I just want to talk to you but no one is giving me the chance.”

You felt yourself blushing due to the heat in the tent but also due to the reaction your friends gave you and you absolutely hated it.

“So you had to be all dramatic and drag me away? They’re going to think were hooking up right now.”

You laughed a little uncomfortably at that, absolutely not needing that thought in your head right now. Like you did during your conversation the day before, you took a deep breath while trying to figure out how you were going to explain yourself.

Before you could say something however, you were once again interrupted.

“Ayo are you guys having sex?”

You recognized Tito’s voice this time and could actually scream. Pulling the zipped of your tent open, you stuck your head outside to give him an annoyed look.

“No you idiot, you think I’m going to have sex in a tent that is most definitely not meant for two people while it’s 90 degrees outside.” You didn’t even realise you had denied having sex because of the weather and not because it was with Mat.

Tito put his hands up defensively and backed away towards the group. Fortunately, they couldn’t see your tent from where they were sitting.

Mat could sense you were annoyed and tried to calm you down. You however, were so close to tears and could not handle having him this close to you. you shook his hands of your body and sat down on your mattress.

“I’m so sorry Mat, you can just go back.” You didn’t think you had ever felt so defeated in your life.

“You think I’m leaving you right now? You’re obviously upset, just tell me what’s going on.”

When instead of answering him, you just pulled your head down in between your arms he continued with “Please tell me what’s up.”

It took a while but when you looked up again, there was no sign of tears. Instead you were smiling. Shaking your head you informed Mat that it wasn’t the right moment and assured him that you would be fine on your own.

He left with a sad sigh and you were left by yourself in the tent. You had no idea what he would tell the group but you hoped he would shut down any rumours surrounding you two.

You didn’t join the group when they initially left for the stage, needing some more time to yourself. Assuring your friends you were fine and just had a little headache, they left you with your thoughts. Deciding once again that your chances were ruined for the night, you reached for a drink. Just one, to clear your mind.

You felt really sad, just sitting on the ground in front of your tent by yourself and so after thirty minutes, you decided to go enjoy the music anyways.

When you found the group after texting Tito asking for a location, you immediately regretted your decision. People were giving you looks of pity and you wondered if anyone had figured you out yet. At this point, you couldn’t care less.

You ignored the looks you were given and tried to put up a reassuring smile. You didn’t know it you succeeded in fooling anyone but no one commented so you were satisfied.

It took you a minute, but you did end up enjoying yourself in the end. You had to admit the music was growing on you even though you had never heard any of the songs being played.

You opened your eyes to Mat staring at you a couple of times but you went straight back to dancing. You really couldn’t handle being interrupted anymore.

It appeared your luck had run out however, as Mat joined made his way over to you after making eye contact another time.

Just as he was about to speak, loud bangs came from your left. You both let out a tiny scream being caught unaware by the noise. The bangs ended up being fireworks to signify the end of the show.

You turned back towards Mat and were almost entranced by how he looked in the flashing lights. Deciding that it was really now of never, you moved closer to Mat. Stepping close enough to feel his breath on your face, you whispered “Stop me if you don’t want this.”

Mat looked confused at what your said but you didn’t hear a no and so you pushed a little further until you reached his mouth. Pressing your lips to his more forceful you felt Mat’s hands at your waist pulling you even closer. You couldn’t stop yourself from smiling into the kiss, feeling so relieved that he hadn’t pulled away.

Kissing Mat felt like nothing you’d ever felt before. The fireworks, how loud they might’ve been, faded away until you could only focus on the feeling Mat gave you now that you were finally kissing him.

You knew he would probably want an explanation later but at this moment, you did not care. 

[bisluthq]

SS Tily does not lay claim to Lover; a thesis

I thought this would take me longer but y’all, I’m done with Part 2 of my Gaylor analyses. Unfortunately this chapter brings bad news for Tily nation. I honestly don’t think many of the songs on Lover are about that relationship. But I also think it’s not as simple as the mainstream Kaylor narrative would have us believe. Let’s dive into this, shall we? 

First things first. I think it’s worth noting that many of the songs on this album are not about romantic relationships at all. Like it’s a bit of a marketing ploy to portray it as an album primarily about romantic love when so many songs explicitly aren’t about that feeling. In fact, there are more themes on Lover than on any of her earlier stuff - it’s something she expands on in folklore. 

I Forgot That You Existed, The Man, The Archer (which I firmly believe is about her debating coming out), Miss Americana & the Heartbreak Prince (very obviously about the political situation generally and supported by the doccie title), London Boy, Soon You’ll Get Better, YNTCD, and ME! are all about explicitly different themes. Obviously there are a couple references within those (like ME! has that line about “I never leave well enough alone” which reappears on the 1, and The Archer mentions someone “staying” but I still think ME! is about self-love not romantic love and The Archer is about personal anxiety around identity). Fundamentally, they are not love songs.

I don’t think that’s really up for debate. The only one I can see anyone - say Toes or like hardcore Tily fans - debating is London Boy. Unfortunately for my Tily babes, I do think it’s satire that serves as a homage to Joe and the other British beards, and possibly riffs a teeny bit on her time with Lily. Contrary to some gold medalists in Kaylor mental gymnastics, I fully believe Tay does make reference to Joe in her lyrics (I’ve mentioned the fictional verse for Dress and the reference to “keeping him” in Ready for It). This really doesn’t have any of the hallmarks of Tily songs off of Rep. The British references in CIWYW, KOMH and Delicate are subtle and chilled and actually quite cute. London Boy is an onslaught of non-sequiturs about London, the UK and her beards. Also “stories from uni” fits both Joe and Tom H, but it doesn’t fit Lily who never went to university. All her Lily songs are about hiding out in private; London Boy is all about galavanting around town with “his” friends (Lily and Tay had the same friends though?) It’s simply not about the same person or the same relationship. 

I do think there’s a chance it could be poking fun (lightly) at Lily/that period she spent in London because as I’ve already said I think Tay is not above shading ex-girlfriends and it seems like the kind of thing Karlie would’ve also found a bit funny. I think when she got back together with Karlie - which almost definitely happened - she would’ve 100% laughed about the “say you fancy me not fancy stuff” era. That would explain the recurrence of both Motown and queen imagery, which first appeared on KOMH. But where KOMH felt very genuine and authentic, this one is obviously meant to be funny. 

Right. So. Now that we’ve established 8 songs are about other themes, let’s get the Kaylor songs sorted: Cruel Summer, Cornelia Street, DBATC, False God and Daylight are all undeniably about Karlie fucking Kloss. They all feature the images and tropes and hallmarks that pepper Karlie songs. They all have the same kinds of emotions. And they paint a pretty sad, troubling and complex picture. 

Cruel Summer comes first and seems to mostly be about their first breakup, which she first referred to on DWOHT. We have Tay once again begging Karlie to stay and work it out and not being certain for sure about her feelings.  

We say that we'll just screw it up in these trying times

We're not trying (Oh yeah, you're right, I want it)

I mean that’s super sad. Tay’s saying they discussed how they’ll fuck it all up, and she’s feeling like they’re not even trying to fix things. You also have that “I want it” which is interesting considering the “we” that preceded it. “We’re” not trying because only “I want it”. Ouch. 

Killing me slow, out the window

I'm always waiting for you to be waiting below

Devils roll the dice, angels roll their eyes

What doesn't kill me makes me want you more

And it's new, the shape of your body

It's blue, the feeling I've got

And it's ooh, whoa oh

It's a cruel summer

It's cool, that's what I tell 'em

No rules in breakable heaven

But ooh, whoa oh

It's a cruel summer

With you

Here we have “I’m always waiting for you” which yet again suggests Tay is the one who’s more invested. Then we have the shape of “your” body (which is a familiar concept from Dress), but the feeling it gives her here is blue here not gold - maybe that’s why the shape is new? In the past Karlie’s body made her feel golden but now it’s a bluer, sadder feeling. Blue starts recurring more frequently on these late era Kaylor songs. There’s a possible alternate reading, which is blue = Swiftgron (“my love had been frozen deep blue”). It’s a nice theory but it just doesn’t gel with the garden gate below. Also, while both relationships seem to have been colored by commitment issues, the premise of unrequitedness doesn’t really feature on the songs about Di. She asks Di to stay, tells her she’s thinking of her, and they’re “too in love to think straight” but Tay never says Karlie loves her back. Ever. It’s never expressly mutual. 

I'm drunk in the back of the car

And I cried like a baby coming home from the bar (Oh)

Said, "I'm fine," but it wasn't true

I don't wanna keep secrets just to keep you

And I snuck in through the garden gate

Every night that summer just to seal my fate (Oh)

And I scream, "For whatever it's worth

I love you, ain't that the worst thing you ever heard?"

He looks up, grinning like a devil

Look at that fourth line. It perfectly fits with the Kaylor narrative on Rep and it doesn’t fit the Tily songs at all. She wanted to keep that second relationship private and secret and hidden. And here she’s saying “I don’t want to keep secrets” - this is take two of “I don’t want you like a best friend”. Also the “for whatever it’s worth” reminds me of “here’s the truth” from End Game. It’s the kind of thing you’d say in the midst of a fight. 

Then we have her screaming “I love you” and receiving no reply as usual beyond a devilish grin. The more I do these analyses the less I understand how or why Kaylor gets romanticized in the way it does, while Swiftgron gets bashed for toxicity. Like my girl Tay has a thing for chaotic lesbians with commitment issues and Kaylor seems like it was WILD. 

Back to the lyrics, this time let’s look at Kaylor anthem Cornelia Street:

We were in the backseat

Drunk on something stronger than the drinks in the bar

"I rent a place on Cornelia Street"

I say casually in the car

We were a fresh page on the desk

Filling in the blanks as we go

As if the street lights pointed in an arrowhead

Leading us home

I find this whole song really interesting because it features one of Tay’s favorite ideas - glamorizing normal people things. It’s like the time with the “motel bar” in Getaway Car. Like she 100% was thrilled to be able to say “I’m renting this apartment” - never mind that it’s basically a whole ass house. I actually think the above verse is really beautiful. I know I give Kaylor a lot of shit but obviously there were beautiful moments and Tay had/has plenty of good memories. 

And I hope I never lose you, hope it never ends

I'd never walk Cornelia Street again

That's the kind of heartbreak time could never mend

I'd never walk Cornelia Street again

And baby, I get mystified by how this city screams your name

And baby, I'm so terrified of if you ever walk away

I'd never walk Cornelia Street again

I'd never walk Cornelia Street again

I mean frankly this verse above is super insecure in the standard Kaylor way. Tay’s saying she’s terrified of Karlie walking away and that she “hopes” she never loses her. The tone is sad, forlorn and a little desperate. I also think it’s interesting that she says she’d never walk Cornelia Street again, and that the city screams Karlie’s name and then on hoax she goes ahead and says she left a part of herself back in New York. It’s almost like her fears and anxieties did prove justified. Poor baby. 

Windows flung right open, autumn air

Jacket 'round my shoulders is yours

We bless the rains on Cornelia Street

Memorize the creaks in the floor

Back when we were card sharks, playing games

I thought you were leading me on

I packed my bags, left Cornelia Street

Before you even knew I was gone

But then you called, showed your hand

I turned around before I hit the tunnel

Sat on the roof, you and I

Those first four lines seem to be about the good again, and I’m happy for them. I really do think they had good times. Those four lines make me think of parts of YAIL and the toast and weekends and stuff. 

The rest of this verse though seems to be about the first split and subsequent reunion. “I thought you were leading me on” she says, and I “left Cornelia Street” presumably to go to London. But then Karlie called her back, “showed her hand” and Tay “turned around” before she reached the point of no return and they worked it out. “Sat on the roof, you and I” is similar in content to “up on the roof with a schoolgirl crush” but very different in tone. She’s not peppy here, she’s not positive. It’s a little bit tortured - and then it continues with “hoping it never ends”. The reappearance of the Tily imagery on Kaylor 2.0 songs makes sense to me, again, because discussing exes in the same social circle as you is just blatant lesbian culture. It makes complete sense that these two women are on Taylor’s mind. She has really really deep feelings for Karlie but she enjoyed the more simple and straightforward relationship she had with Lily. 

DBATC is the Kaylor 1.0 breakup anthem:

Saying goodbye is death by a thousand cuts

Flashbacks waking me up

I get drunk, but it's not enough

'Cause the morning comes and you're not my baby

I look through the windows of this love

Even though we boarded them up

Chandelier's still flickering here

'Cause I can't pretend it's okay when it's not

It's death by a thousand cuts

We have her getting drunk to forget, trying to say “I’m fine” when it’s not true, and just generally missing Karlie. 

I dress to kill my time, I take the long way home

I mean, this is Cornelia Street (“never walk here again”) and Dress all over again. It’s the two ideas from before but now on the other side, because they’re actually broken up. 

And what once was ours is no one's now

I see you everywhere, the only thing we share

Is this small town

You said it was a great love, one for the ages

But if the story's over, why am I still writing pages?

“I see you everywhere” is very “this city screams your name” and I think “small town” is a metaphor for their social circle. The last two lines are just Tay being hung up on Karlie. She was writing pages in Cornelia Street as well, so this whole idea of telling a story with Karlie is another recurrent image. 

My heart, my hips, my body, my love

Tryna find a part of me that you didn't touch

Gave up on me like I was a bad drug

Now I'm searching for signs in a haunted club

Our songs, our films, united, we stand

Our country, guess it was a lawless land

Quiet my fears with the touch of your hand

Paper cut stings from our paper-thin plans

My time, my wine, my spirit, my trust

Tryna find a part of me you didn't take up

Gave you so much, but it wasn't enough

But I'll be alright, it's just a thousand cuts

I mean this is the usual obsession, desperation and general pining Tay has for Karlie. We also have Karlie touching her briefly, which is something she has spoken about before and is really into. Paper-thin plans is probably about the plans to make it work? We have that image reparations later in hoax so I think it’s most likely about Karlie bailing on Tay’s PR game and doing her own thing and/or Karlie’s (accidental?) involvement in the masters heist. 

Also, this whole song is very sad but it’s not on the level of desperation I would expect if Tay wasn’t rebounding hard and if they didn’t reunite. She’s pretty sad about how the whole thing went down but she does say she’ll “be alright” which is the opposite of “that’s the kind of heartbreak time could never mend”. I think she wrote this after the first breakup and Cornelia Street came later, after they were back together. That’s when she really went all in into this relationship. It still wasn’t enough. 

False God is about their reunion:

We were crazy to think

Crazy to think that this could work

Remember how I said I'd die for you?

We were stupid to jump

In the ocean separating us

Remember how I'd fly to you?

We know Tay ran away to Europe after the mess of 2016 and here she jumps into the ocean separating them and flies back to Karlie. The idea of it being “crazy” that it could work is also a recurrent fear/anxiety she has with regards to Karlie. “I had a bad feeling,” remember?

And I can't talk to you when you're like this

Staring out the window like I'm not your favorite town

I'm New York City, I still do it for you, babe

They all warned us about times like this

They say the road gets hard and you get lost

When you're led by blind faith, blind faith

They’re figuring things out, and Tay is New York - Karlie’s favorite city. “I still do it for you” is an admission of affection, which rarely happens in Kaylor songs, but it’s so sexual that I don’t find it shocking or out of character. 

But we might just get away with it

Religion's in your lips

Even if it's a false god

We'd still worship

We might just get away with it

The altar is my hips

Even if it's a false god

We'd still worship this love

I mean sex songs are just peak Kaylor and this is all just so so so gay and I don’t understand how hets can make it make srnse. “We might just get away with it” is the usual Kaylor anxiety by the way. 

I know heaven's a thing

I go there when you touch me, honey

Hell is when I fight with you

But we can patch it up good

Make confessions and we're begging for forgiveness

Got the wine for you

And you can't talk to me when I'm like this

Daring you to leave me just so I can try and scare you

You're the West Village

You still do it for me, babe

They all warned us about times like this

They say the road gets hard and you get lost

When you're led by blind faith, blind faith

Standard Kaylor imagery with sensual touching, wine and New York and a direct reference to Karlie’s apartment. I think “make confessions and we’re begging for forgiveness” appears to refer to the reunion. 

Daylight is a very beautiful love song for Karlie. The “golden”, the bodies intertwining, New York, and the depth of her emotions all fit the Kaylor story and narrative. I think she wrote this when they were back together. It’s also, as is common with the Kaylor songs, squarely from Tay’s perspective. She wrote it alone, and I think specifically for Karlie when they reunited. Very pretty, very nice. I mean they ended up breaking up and that was bound to happen in like every other song but when they were good Tay did create some gems and they were very happy. I love this song and I do like aspects of Kaylor’s time together. 

Now we get onto the songs that don’t neatly fit Kaylor. 

Afterglow could be a Kaylor song. But it could also be about the breakup with her rebound. It’s not only by Tay, so we’re looking for broad themes rather than specifics necessarily. 

Hey, it's all me, in my head

I'm the one who burned us down

But it's not what I meant

Sorry that I hurt you

I don't wanna do, I don't wanna do this to you (Ooh)

I don't wanna lose, I don't wanna lose this with you (Ooh)

I need to say, hey, it's all me, just don't go

Meet me in the afterglow

I don’t know that this sounds like the Kaylor breakup we heard about. It’s a different premise to False God, DBATC and Cornelia Street. In all of those songs it was a mutual breakup/misunderstanding. “I can’t talk to you” and then “you can’t talk to me” in False God is a two-way communication issue. DBATC goes off at Karlie for taking up every part of her and “giving up on me”. Cornelia Street said Tay thought Karlie was “leading her on” but that was resolved. Then Afterglow goes and lays all the blame on Tay. 

I lived like an island, punished you with silence

Went off like sirens, just crying

Why'd I have to break what I love so much?

It's on your face, don't walk away, I need to say

Hey, it's all me, in my head

I'm the one who burned us down

I mean this really does sound like it’s Tay fucking up badly. Not wanting to let the other person in, taking it out on them, hurting her lover. 

It's so excruciating to see you low

Just wanna lift you up and not let you go

This ultraviolet morning light below

Tells me this love is worth the fight, oh

This really doesn’t sound like the Kaylor fear and stress. It sounds like the cerebral and emotional connection from Rep. “It’s so excruciating to see you low” seems tied up with the heart to hearts and conversations she was having in those secondary songs on Rep. 

Tell me that you're still mine

Tell me that we'll be just fine

Even when I lose my mind

I need to say

Tell me that it's not my fault

Tell me that I'm all you want

Even when I break your heart

I need to say

This just seems like a very different plan for fixing things than the one outlined in the Kaylor songs (which is “let’s bone”). Also “I break your heart” is an anxiety that seems to parallel the burgeoning love in Delicate, KOMH and CIWYW. It doesn’t seem like a Kaylor fear because Tay is always the one who wants Karlie more. I believe this is mostly a Tily breakup song. 

Then we get the three happy songs on the album: Lover, I Think He Knows and Paper Rings. It’s actually pretty intense that there are only three peppy, romantic songs on an album largely touted by Gaylors and Hetlors alike as being about a happy long term relationship. 

You want my controversial explanation for these songs? They’re fictional. All three are extremely vague and lacking in any of the Karlie/other person imagery. They’re like New Year’s Day and some of the early stuff. 

I Think He Knows is a very hetro song. It physically pains me to say that, it really does, but nothing about it seems gay to me. I guess “boyish look” is something you could say about some women but that’s really a reach. Also it’s just very much not a relatable lesbian emotion. I’ve never met a queer woman being like “yeah I think she KNOWS, you know?” about her girlfriend. “She’s so obsessed with me and boy I understand” would make no sense. Us sapphics are compulsive overthinkers. And that’s what comes across on all her songs about Karlie and about Di and even those Tily songs from Rep. That’s largely why Tay’s stuff is so damn gay. 

Tay’s permanently anxious - even on her love songs, there’s a thread of anxiety running through it all. This song is missing any of that anxiety. This song also has so, so many male pronouns…. And “I am an architect, I'm drawing up the plans” is an objectively weird thing to say about a relationship. It just doesn’t strike me as sapphic, and it definitely doesn’t strike me as being about Karlie lr Lily or Di. Also Nashville is 16th Avenue and I don’t know why any of the women would be associated with Nashville.

That Nashville reference makes me think that maybe the song is inspired by the music industry generally? If you go look at 16th Avenue by Lacy J. Dalton, there’s a clear narrative about the music industry. I think it’s possible that Tay’s song is referencing the love she feels for and from the music industry and her fans. That would tie into the architectural plans, being 17 (she often speaks about being stuck at that age because it’s when she got famous), and “he’s so obsessed with me” makes sense when you’re AOTD. Even the “attitude” line makes sense in this interpretation. 

This bit:

Lyrical smile, indigo eyes, hand on my thigh

We can follow the sparks, I'll drive

Lyrical smile, indigo eyes, hand on my thigh

We can follow the sparks, I'll drive

"So where we gonna go?"

I whisper in the dark

"Where we gonna go?"

I think he knows

Is a little harder to make sense of and seems like it could maybe be about Lily or at least inspired by her - there’s the car/driving theme from the secondary Rep relationship and Lily does have indigo eyes (they’re way bluer than Joe’s). So maybe she used images and diaries from that period to add to the story about Nashville? But overall this smugness just doesn’t strike me as very gay and in general the song doesn’t seem to be about any one woman in her history. Also “better lock it down or I won’t stick around” is so very hetro and like… untortured. 

Paper Rings is not about Karlie but I also don’t think it’s about Lily. 

The moon is high

Like your friends were the night that we first met

Went home and tried to stalk you on the internet

Now I've read all of the books beside your bed

The wine is cold

Like the shoulder that I gave you in the street

Cat and mouse for a month or two or three

Now I wake up in the night and watch you breathe

This is not about Karlie. We’ve heard repeatedly that they fell in love at first sight so “month or two or three” is kinda wild? Like they full on U-Hauled it with the Big Sur trip and Tay moving to New York and Karlie basically moving into her apartment. They were never cat and mouse? Also Karlie was a supermodel by the time they met one another so “trying to stalk you on the internet” seems a bit of an odd way to phrase it. There would’ve been plenty to find. They both had big reputations. Moreover, they had multiple mutual friends so “your friends” is also an odd turn of phrase. How does this verse fit any aspect of the Kaylor love story? 

In the winter, in the icy outdoor pool

When you jumped in first, I went in too

I'm with you even if it makes me blue

Which takes me back

To the color that we painted your brother's wall

Honey, without all the exes, fights, and flaws

We wouldn't be standing here so tall, so

This is also very not Kaylor lol except for the tall part. The chilled out hanging out and swimming and wall painting sounds more like the songs about Tily on Rep. 

I like shiny things, but I'd marry you with paper rings

Uh huh, that's right

Darling, you're the one I want, and

I hate accidents except when we went from friends to this

Uh huh, that's right

Darling, you're the one I want

In paper rings in picture frames in dirty dreams

Oh, you're the one I want

This seems like it could be Tily because of the “we went from friends to this” (Kaylor were never friends, and had no intention of being friends, they’ve literally only ever dated). But I’m not sure Tay ever wanted to marry Lily? That’s not what comes across in the other Tily songs. 

I want to drive away with you

I want your complications too

I want your dreary Mondays

Wrap your arms around me, baby boy

The driving and the chilledness is similar to the Tily songs but I’m still not sold. It really doesn’t feel particularly authentic. 

Also, I know I mostly do lyric analysis but I’d like to include this quote from Tay about the song: “This song talks about true love, and if you really find true love, you probably don't really care what the symbolism of that love is. Material things wouldn't matter to you anymore if you found someone that you just wanted to live your life with.” The quote is distinctly hypothetical. “You probably don’t really care” “wouldn’t” “if you found”....

My gut says this is based around positive romantic relationships she has had but is extrapolated to a rosy conclusion. One day, Tay’s gonna want to marry someone with paper rings. But for now it’s a fictional hypothetical. None of the details fit any of her relationships. It’s made up. That’s why it includes the “baby boy” line... because it’s fiction. 

And now for the really hot take… Lover is equally made up, although she was - again - inspired by her real relationships. 

We could leave the Christmas lights up 'til January

This is our place, we make the rules

And there's a dazzling haze, a mysterious way about you, dear

Have I known you twenty seconds or twenty years?

This is continuing the themes from New Year’s Day which always strikes me as a “what if” rather than an actual ode to one of the muses. That final line seems like it could be about Karlie but the absolute calmness with which she sings makes it seem like it’s not about her. The mysterious way is also a brand new image and considering how much she sings about Karlie you would’ve thought we’d have had that image at least once before?

Can I go where you go?

Can we always be this close forever and ever?

And ah, take me out and take me home

You're my, my, my, my

Lover

I mean this doesn’t sound like Kaylor. Part of the anxiety there is always about going places together and being seen. It does have bits that seem like Tily to me; “take me out and take me home” kind of reminds me of the “meet me in the back” and “can we always be this close” seems similar to “is it chill that you’re in my head?” 

We could let our friends crash in the living room

This is our place, we make the call

And I'm highly suspicious that everyone who sees you wants you

I've loved you three summers now, honey, but I want 'em all

The first three lines could be about either Karlie or Lily although I don’t know if Tily had “their place”. Kaylor definitely did. 

That last line… is kinda why I think this is mostly fiction. I mean we know it doesn’t make sense for Toe. We know that. And I know about the gymnastics to fit it as a Kaylor song. But the thing is, even if she wrote it around the time that they went away to Wyoming, why wouldn’t she update it when recording it? It literally doesn’t fit the Toe timeline so it can’t be that she wanted it for that. She could’ve made it vague. But no she says “three summers”. Where else have we heard about “three summers”?

September saw a month of tears

And thankin' God that you weren't here

To see me like that

But in a box beneath my bed

Is a letter that you never read

From three summers back

It's hard not to find it all a little bitter sweet

That’s from Tim McGraw. 

She just likes that image. It recurs. It’s not about Karlie, and it’s not about Lily, and it’s obviously not about Joe. It’s just a pretty turn of phrase. She loves counting in summers and Cruel Summers and the summer in Betty/august…. It’s not something she associates with one person. 

Ladies and gentlemen, will you please stand?

With every guitar string scar on my hand

I take this magnetic force of a man to be my

Lover

My heart's been borrowed and yours has been blue

All's well that ends well to end up with you

Swear to be over-dramatic and true to my

Lover

This whole wedding bit doesn’t make sense for either Kaylor or Tily or Swiftgron. Like she’s constantly questioning Karlie’s commitment to her. And you want me to believe she’s singing vows? Lol no. 

And you'll save all your dirtiest jokes for me

And at every table, I'll save you a seat

Lover

Very cute. Very non-specific. Not about any one partner. 

So this supposed ode/serenade to Karlie doesn’t feature any of the images associated with her and doesn’t include any details that actively fit their relationship arc as described elsewhere except for jealousy and possibly love at first sight. 

These three peppy love songs - which make up the minority of songs on the album - are about Taylor’s manifestations for the future. ITHK could be about the industry more generally. The other two are describing what she wants and what she pictures as ideal for a relationship. 

So conclusions: a large chunk of the songs on Lover aren’t about romance. Many, many are about Karlie. Afterglow could be about Lily and some of the regrets Tay had about the split. Paper Rings, I Think He Knows and Lover aren’t about anyone in particular. 

Last thought: I agree that It’s Nice To Have a Friend is about lesbians generally. But also possibly about Karlie, in which case the final verse is Karlie choosing the marriage with Josh and in that case the song is fucking devastating and heartbreaking. But tbh a lot about Kaylor is so it’s no surprise 🤷🏻‍♀️ 

---------------------------------------------------

As usual, I’m up to discuss this. Do you agree? Disagree? Let’s talk! xx

[midearthwritings]

Could I please get an Lotr and The Hobbit Matchup, of you're still doing them? Thanks so much!

🌱 18 year old Woman // Bisexual // Autistic and Disabled with a bonus Anxiety Disorder

🌱 I have a litany of Chronic Illnesses including Autism, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, Depression, Dyscalculia (Dyslexia for Math), Scoliosis, Sleep Apnea, Asthma, a Growth Hormone Deficiency, Insomnia, and a very bad Overbite. I also have a condition where my right leg is physically longer than my left, which causes pain in my hip and right leg, as well as trouble walking. My usual symptoms include Fatigue, Back Pain, Executive Dysfunction (struggle to get tasks done), Difficulty breathing and talking, Very short stature, and difficulties with my balance. I also stim by pacing around in circles and talking to myself.

🌱 I have a serious fear of heights, partially because of my balance issues. It's so bad that I can't even use stairs without holding onto the railing.

🌱 I know a lot of Home Remedies and Superstitions for like no reason. For instance, did you know that Raspberry Tea helps with Menstrual Pain, or that knocking on wood invokes the protection of the tree spirit and that’s why it’s said to give you luck? I don’t know why I know that, but I do.

🌱 Winning a fight is on my bucket list, but it has to be for a good reason. I’m not one to just pick fights for the sake of fighting, and I’m actually pretty conflict-averse due to trauma, so I need to actually have a solid reason for throwing hands. But I’ve always wanted to do it for some reason.

🌱 I really like studying Witchcraft for some reason. The first spell I ever performed was a Healing Spell to help my friend who was sick with Crohn's Disease. Thirty minutes after performing the ritual, I got a text saying he felt a lot better and he was released from the hospital a couple days later, so I guess it must’ve worked. 😁

🌱 My love language is definitely gift giving. I’m pretty cheap, but I’m also an artist, so when push comes to shove I’ll just make something for someone when I like them. I pay very close attention to what people like because it gives me more ideas on how to interact with them. I’m essentially a large, flightless Crow. You were nice, so you get something shiny. But though I like giving gifts to others, I’m not very materialistic at all. I prefer to be practical when it comes to things, and I get very nervous when spending money on myself.

🌱 I’m an avid writer and am actually planning on publishing a book this summer!

🌱 I LOVE going outside and getting messy. Playing in the mud, getting soaked in the rain, I’m the type to go outside and come back home covered in dirt and twigs. It’s just really fun to me.

🌱 I've been told that I'm a very good cook, and I can bake pretty well too.

🌱 I’ve always wanted to be a really good gardener. My dream house is just covered in flowers and plants and such. I want to live in a Greenhouse, basically.

🌱 I have a habit of giggling to myself just by remembering something funny that happened, even if it was a couple years ago. I also laugh when I do something stupid, because I find my flaws and shortcomings funny for the most part. I love to laugh with people, but never at them.

🌱 I know way too much about Spirits and Fae. My favorite book is called ‘The Encyclopedia of Spirits’ and it shows you how to contact and interact with a ton of different deities and spirits, and I’m addicted to reading it. It’s the best.

🌱 I’m basically like a tiny, less-impressive Aragorn. I love travelling on foot, getting messy outside, I was kind of a Horse Girl as a kid ngl, I’ve always wanted to be a knight or king of some sort, chances are that I haven’t bathed in awhile, and I too would pine for a hot elf girl for literal years on end.

🌱 My closest friends say I give off “Dwobbit” vibes. That’s a ½ Dwarf and ½ Hobbit btw. I’m around 4’ 10” tall, I don’t shave, I love crafting and art, I live in the Mountains, I’m tomboyish but I also love gardening and can be a bit of a homebody, I love going barefoot, etc.

🌱 I really love History, Folklore, Mythology and Fairy Tales. My favorite is the Irish myth of Oisín in Tir Na Nog. Look it up if you don’t know it, it’s a fantastic story. But I also appreciate myths from all sorts of different cultures, like the myth of Annapurna in India or the tale of Princess Kaguya in Japan.

🌱 I’m an Aquarius, INFP and 4w5 if that means anything. For reference, characters who are also 4w5 INFPs include Lydia Deetz (Beetlejuice), Wirt (Otgw), Frankenstein’s Monster, Luna Lovegood (HP), Napstablook (Undertale), Erik The Phantom of the Opera, and Celeste from Animal Crossing. That kinda tells you a lot about me, doesn’t it?

🌱 I am naturally very shy and take awhile to open up to people. I also get flustered very easily and tend to avoid social interaction a lot. I’m a huge introvert, but I also really do love meeting interesting people, so I try to talk to them when I have the energy to.

🌱 I have very long Disheveled brown hair, that actually used to be blonde when I was little, so there’s a few lighter patches in there. It's essentially a fluffy mane at this point, but because of my poor hand-eye coordination I never learned how to braid it. I have really pale skin, with lots of moles, freckles and scabs. It’s also warmer out, so I almost certainly have a farmer’s tan. I have very light blue eyes and glasses.

🌱 I have a habit of seeing shadows move out of the corners of my eyes, frequently mistaking them for people or animals, but when I turn to look there’s nothing there. I’ve gotten my eyesight checked multiple times, but there’s nothing out of the ordinary, so it’s either a lack of sleep, or the Fae are getting antsy with me. Probably the former of course, but part of me would like to believe the latter too.

Sorry the description is so long, I can't wait to see my results! Thanks so much, wishing you the best!!

Hey darling! First, wow that was really long! Sorry for taking so long to make it, as I mentioned before, I'm a fucking procrastinator.

Aragorn

For LOTR, I'm pairing you up with Aragorn.

Aragorn had probably loved you for a really really long time.

But he's extremely patient and careful with you, so it took him a while to confess his love.

When he did, it was kind of overwhelming for you, and you were really doubting the whole thing. But again, he was really patient with you.

Aragorn doesn't cover you in gifts to show his love. He shows it by remembering all those little things that make you you.

The two of you can spend hours telling stories and tales to the other. It's your favorite thing to do together.

He loves that you write and always ask to read your work. Although, he never pushes you and respects you when you refuse.

He knows about every single one of your illnesses and makes sure that you always have what you need.

Bilbo Baggins

For the Hobbit, I picked Bilbo.

Bilbo loves you deeply and truly. He thinks all the things that are annoying to others are what make you the most unique being he has ever met.

He thinks listening to you tell tales is more fascinating than reading.

Most of all, he loves when you read to him the stories that you have created.

Sometimes, your illnesses are a bit complicated for him to understand, but he does his best and listens to your needs.

His favorite thing to do with you is cooking. Sometimes, you will even compete over who is the best cook. Although he admitted more than once that you were.

When you are out gardening, he sits outside with you and watches you. He thinks it's beautiful how hard you work to make his garden look so gorgeous.

He is often insecure about losing you. He is scared that he won't be able to provide you with what you need, or won't be able to show you how much he loves you.

As for you, you fear that one day he might grow tired of you.

But the communication in your relationship is great and your insecurities are even washed away by promises of eternal love.

Again, sorry for the wait! I hope you liked it!