#it's not like i wouldn't be generous it's just that I'm deeply uncomfortable with the public statewide hitlist lol

[itstimeforstarwars]

I live in a state where it's required by law for the lottery to post your name your hometown and how much you win if you win a big prize and as someone who has a very unique first name and lives in a town with less than 500 people whenever I play lottery I am very afraid of actually winning anything more than like $500.

[randomshyperson]

Teddy Pickers - Heart Shaped Series

Chapter Summary: In the rare quiet time in the lives of fugitives, you and Wanda play a game of questions. It's like that old saying: There's always a peaceful period before the storm. Or could it be that this time, the storm has already passed?

Warnings: (+18), soft and almost entirely a smut chapter, making out, dirty talking but they are actually just playful and dorky with each other, more shapeshifting stuff, hints of PTSD and trauma talk, some self-doubt from both, mainly fluff and hurt/comfort | Words: 4.845k

A/N-> So I had two chapters ready but I hated them. I had to rewrite the whole thing because I was unsure where to take this story. I'm all on my supercorp era again and I was taking this to a very angsty line and I don't want that. So I changed and gave them peace and quiet instead. Also, I can't wait to write jealous hormonal mess Wanda in the next chapters! A good reading for you all!

General Masterlist | Wattpad | AO3 | Series Masterlist

-&-

You woke up to her nightmares.

Still groggy from sleep, you rubbed your eyes and forced your body to react to the figure murmuring softly beside you, her face contorted in discomfort. At some point during the night, Wanda let go of you, snatched almost the entire comforter, and then began to dream.

And apparently, it wasn't a good one. It surprised you a little that you were affected by it, but you made a mental note of Wanda's impressive ability to emit a magical aura even in her sleep. That might explain why her room was set apart from the others in the tower.

Your touch was gentle on her face, and you called her softly until you woke her up. Wanda jumped a little, opening red, frightened irises until she realized she was just having a bad dream. She barely recognized your presence, and already pressed her face into your collarbone, breathing deeply against your skin.

"Are you all right, my love?" You asked after a moment, stroking her hair as her breathing returned to normal.

Wanda sniffled, and your heart broke. Your reaction was to look for her eyes, to reassure her, but she wrapped her arms tightly around you and wouldn't let you move away.

You sighed before adding: "It was just a bad dream, my little witch."

But Wanda sniffles again, this time pressing her face into your chest so that she can speak.

"It wasn't just a dream." She mumbles upset. "I was remembering... Pietro."

A lump forms in your throat. You swallow. "Oh, Wanda... I'm so sorry."

"It's all right." She hits back immediately, without moving a muscle. She continues to hold you as if she feels you'll disappear if she lets go. "It's been a while since I thought about that day. I didn't mean to disturb you."

"You certainly shouldn't worry about how I'm going to feel about this." You retort firmly. "He's your brother. You can cry all you want. I'll be here to hold you."

The words make her shift immediately and press her face against your body where you can feel new tears wetting your pajamas. But Wanda doesn't cry for long - she falls asleep again, her limbs locked tightly around you, and even though the position gets a little uncomfortable after a while, you don't have the heart to push her away. Especially since, after a while, her nightmares return and the magical aura is strong enough for the memories of the past to shine through your eyes.

You sigh, adjusting yourself to kiss the top of her head and settling her so that she's completely asleep on your body - which changes a little, growing just enough for Wanda to have all the soft hold she needs. She smiles unconsciously, tightening her embrace before falling back into a deep sleep. With the softness of her expression, you are reassured to know that the nightmares are gone, at least for the moment.

You try to fall asleep, but your ear picks up the soft vibration of your work cell phone in your jacket pocket hanging from the chair in the bedroom. Your body tenses during every ring, until it finally relaxes when the device goes silent. 

Work is calling, you know. Just as you know you can't run away forever.

Hours later when you wake again, it’s for rays of sunshine slipping the curtains and chaste kisses on your collarbone. You smile immediately.

"Morning, little witch." Your sleepy voice makes Wanda raise her eyes to you, her lips never leaving your skin. The soft scratch of her nails on your stomach makes your muscles twitch. "You're up to mischief, I see."

Your teasing makes her chuckle hoarsely, her hands climbing further up your pajama top and exposing your torso almost completely.

But instead of starting another trail of kisses, she sat up straight against your hip and waited for you to open your eyes.

"You change in your sleep." She declares as you stare at her, still awake. "Did you know that?"

You nod, and Wanda raises a curious eyebrow. She has a joke on the tip of her tongue about how the hell you knew something if you were asleep when you explain; 

"I used to be monitored twenty-four hours a day when I was a child. To prevent any minor detail from slipping through the records and interfering with the research."

Wanda bites the inside of her cheek, absorbing your confession for a second. She could count on her fingers the few times you had mentioned some random detail about your life before, and it took her by surprise. Almost everything she knew came from the Avengers' archives and carried technical and military analysis. She heard very little from your mouth.

"You never talk about your past." That's what she manages to answer because it's a fact. 

You offer her a small smile, your hands moving to reach her thighs on either side of your hips. 

"What would you like to know?"

Wanda sighs, her hands resting on your shoulders. "I'll listen to anything you want to tell me."

Your smile is tender, almost shy. Wanda likes it when she makes you blush, especially since you have the ability to conceal these reactions from her, changing and commanding your body according to your wishes. Even though you don't do it so often because you trust her.

What a thing. One of the world's greatest criminals blindly trusting an Avenger. She could actually feel very cocky about it.

"I have an idea." You then declare, your fingers playing with the edges of her shorts. Wanda stares at you expectantly, but you almost lose your train of thought at how deliciously beautiful she now looks. The slightly tousled hair, and well, the legs around you, and eyes that beg for everything but conversation. "Let's play a game."

"What kind of game?"

"A game of questions, of course." You retort good-humoredly, adjusting yourself a little to sit up straight. Wanda lets her hands fall to your lap. "Two truths and a lie. Traumatic childhood edition."

Wanda lets out a giggle, pinching you gently for the derogatory joke. You just smile at her, almost completely distracted by the sound of her laughter and the comforting feeling that moment brings to your chest.

"I've never played that one." She says after a moment. "What are the rules?"

"It's very simple. Each person states three facts, but one of them is false. You have to find out which one. The winner is whoever gets it right the most times, although I've just realized that playing something like that with a telepath isn't very fair." Wanda slaps you in a joking manner at the insinuation that she was going to cheat, getting a chuckle from you.

"I'll start then." She then states, assuming a thoughtful expression for a moment. You bite the inside of your cheek, resisting the urge to kiss her cute face and pay attention to the game. "With respect to the theme you've chosen, I grew up in a two-room apartment in the Sokovian countryside. When I was little, I could play the piano. And... I love to cook."

You hum thoughtfully, loosening your grip so that one of your hands goes to your chin. The whole theatrical expression makes Wanda giggle, her cheeks flushing with the way her stomach feels full of butterflies. 

"I say the first one's a lie."

She raises an eyebrow. "Really? Why?"

Your expression changes to one of almost conviction. "Because you grew up in Novi Grad, the Sokovian capital, and not in the countryside. And I have to say, it's very bold of you to assume that I haven't done my homework on you, Wanda Maximoff."

Wanda feels a wave of warmth hit her body and spread with your words. Or perhaps, the way your eyes shine in a way that hides meaning. She allows herself to imagine for a moment your figure in the same clothes you wore when she first met you, frantically going through files at night to learn everything you could learn about her.

It reminds her a little of herself, days after your first encounter, how even though Wanda tried to be as secretive as possible, casually asking about missions in which you faced the Avengers, or reviewing mission files on the pretext that she was studying, Natasha realized what she was doing right away.

Clearing her throat, Wanda looked down, a little embarrassed. "I did the same. With-for you, I mean."

 You smiled, looking at her with an almost impressed expression. "Oh, really? I'm flattered."

"Shut up." She giggles shyly in response, but you, despite chuckling too, insist more firmly;

"No, really. I think it’s quite romantic."

Wanda frowns slightly. "What, being obsessed with each other?"

"Yes." 

"You have problems." She retorts in a false seriousness that makes you smile before Wanda swallows dryly at the way your gaze is focused intensely in her direction. The tension that rises is almost too much for her to be able to say anything else. Yet, she tries with a husky voice. "You got it right. The game, I say."

You nod, smiling. Your open palms on her thighs go up inside her shorts, and Wanda holds her breath for a second. But they only serve to make a gentle lever and pull Wanda closer by her ass, and she bites her lips at the new position, very aware of the warmth on her cheeks and neck.

"My three facts are as follows, Maximoff." You begin, your dark gaze on her previously bitten lips for a moment before focusing on her eyes again. "I was a laboratory experiment all through my childhood. I really like you." Wanda smiles, scrunching her nose adorably. You get momentarily distracted, gaze falling to her lips again. She catches your eyes, a smirk cracking on her mouth when she leans in, subtly asking you to break the distance. End the game. When you manage to talk again, your voice is barely a whisper; “I’m allergic to peanuts.”

She chuckles, arms interlocking behind your head. Wanda mutters a joke, something about keeping an eye for the food, but you firm your hands on her thighs and bring her closer to press your mouths together. It’s a hot kiss - charged with all of your naughty intentions. She lets out a soft moan when your tongue slides on hers, slow and sensual. But suddenly, Wanda breaks the kiss with flushed cheeks and a curious gaze on her eyes.

“Wait!” She asks breathlessly, to which you stare equally affected but expectant. “Your file did have peanuts listed as allergy.”

Damn, you thought you could win that one. A little grin starts to form on your lips, but Wanda narrows her eyes in your direction.

“Someone really did her homework on me, I see.” You tease, leaning in to go back to kissing her, but she evades your attempt, eyes shining a little dangerously.

“If the food was not the lie, and I know for a fact that you were an experience most of your life… Then the lie-” You wanted to laugh at the hidden panic hidden behind her eyes. Honestly, this woman.

What was she even thinking? That you would let her down in some game while having her on your lap? Hours after telling her that you love her?

It should be a hint enough that you’re smiling, for Wanda to realize there’s a joke there. But somehow, she grows more insecure. Her eyes flash red for a moment before and it’s a clear warning.

You just chuckle. “It’s all about semantics, darling.” You explain because it looks like Wanda might cut your head off if you don’t clarify exactly what lie you told. “I don’t just like you. We’re not in middle school. I love you, remember?”

The tension visually leaves her shoulders, but something else happens. Her cheeks and ears grow hotter and Wanda is once more a flustered mess, feeling pretty much like a shy middle schooler because you’re talking about feelings.

You think she’s beautiful, so you tell her that too. “God, you’re beautiful.”

She giggles coyly, kissing you because that’s all she can do without making a fool of herself. Well, if you keep rubbing her thighs under her shorts like that, she’ll probably make a fool of herself anyway, considering how she gets patheticly overwhelmed whenever you touch her.

For a while, you just made out. Slowly and passionately with wandering hands and panting kisses. It’s just nice to feel each other, to hold each other. It’s also very hot to feel Wanda rubbing herself on your lap until the soft friction is not enough.

She bites your lip when that happens, her hips more impatient and frantic against your thigh. All you can do in return is firm your hands on her waist, helping her get what she wants, what she needs. And Wanda stops kissing you because all she can do is moan in return for the time being, quite aware of the wetness dripping down her shorts.

She starts whining into your mouth when she’s close, and it’s too much for you - How can Wanda expects you not to fuck her properly when she’s doing that? - Your hands flip her over in a heartbeat. She barely has time to protest for the interruption of her previous, and desperate motions, when you’re all over her. Groping your way into her clothes, tearing it apart, and taking more eager sounds from her throat.

And Wanda, she’s such a tease. Dark dilated eyes shining with mischief and begging you to just fuck her. The way she lets you strip her out of her clothes, and how she slightly opens her legs, rubbing her ankles behind your kees, inviting you to just-

“Fuck.” You pant for the image in front of you. Wanda bites her lips, one of her hands finding its way to her soft breasts, fingers teasing the hard nipple like she doesn’t mind the slightest that you could lose your sanity to such a sinful gesture.

But Wanda is getting impatient too. The hot knot on her belly is making her dizzy. You’re making her dizzy.

“Need you so bad, detka.” She meowed, her hips arching into the air, allowing you a clear view of her drenched pussy. You can see how wet she is, smell it, yet, a true confirmation only comes when you use one of your hands to press her back into the bed while your free fingers find her warm entrance. Wanda cries out when you enter her, but she’s so hot and so tight, that you have to pull out before pushing two fingers in again and again, stretching her out while she struggles to breathe. Her thigh muscles twitch when your thumb finds her clit, every drawn circle against the hardened bud rips a new throaty moan out of her. 

When she’s close again, impossibly tightly against your fingertips, throbbing, you hum pleasantly, your free hand gripping her waist to take control of her uncoordinated movements. Wanda cries out when you force her into your fingers, reaching deeper now and too good for her to hold back, so the hot knot on her belly explodes without warning and she arches her back, twitching and choking on a moan before going limb on the mattress. You keep fingering her gently, prolonging her orgasm until she complains about the overstimulation with a tug on your wrist. 

You pull your fingers out but not kiss her as she would wish - Instead, you lean down and her dizzy expression falters into a gasp when your mouth finds her cunt, tongue licking every drop of cum you just manage to get. Her natural reaction is to back away, she’s sensitive. But you grab her thighs, find your place between her legs, and start to eat her out like you’re starving. 

“Oh God…fuck-” Her choked moaning mixing in English and Sokovian is music to your ears. Her eyes close on instic, because it’s too much and somehow not enough - Your tongue is teasing her, playing with her clit but not using the necessary pressure she needs. She just came and you barely started and Wanda is ready for more, painting for more.  One of her hands finds your hair, a strong grip that works like a warning. Yet, she says or at least tries to, since it sounds a lot more like a whine than anything else: “Stop teasing.”

To be fair, she could probably ask you anything at any time, especially now. While dripping so sweetly into your tongue, clenching and begging for more. You hum accordingly, ending your tease when sucking on her clit. Wanda screams. Loud enough for other people to hear, that’s for sure, but none of you cares about that. Not now, probably not never.

She can’t hold longer after that, not when you’re doing everything to get another climax out of her, fingers finding her pussy again to help your tongue. It’s so messy and sloppy and nearly desperate. Your own underwear has been bothering you for a while now and Wanda crying out your name is definitely not helping with that.

It’s not a surprise that when she comes, the room shudders a little. Wanda’s not being careful, she’s too gone for that now. Little were the times when she didn’t, couldn’t, hold back herself, her magic. The energy flows to her veins like the heat spreading under her skin when she orgasms and it’s breathtaking and overwhelming and she’s coming so hard that she can’t hold anything back. A wave of warm magic explodes around, her red irises open like her mouth in a silent scream, and it’s beautiful. Wanda is perfect, and she’s all yours. 

She only realizes she ripped the sheets when you move back to her and the bed makes a noise that forces her to notice the room. Such a mess she made. Someone will have to pay for bedroom fixing.

“Enjoying yourself, aren’t you witchy?” You tease fondly about the whole setting, the new crack on the window, the little sparks of her magic that still flow around. Wanda sighs satisfied, her hands finding your face when you’re close enough. When she kisses you, her taste is there and she can only moan at the dirty of that act, how you suck her tongue like you’ve sucked her clit a few minutes ago. 

Wanda doesn’t break the kiss to move her hands lower, groping your still-dressed figure and only now realizing how that is actually torturous.

“Hmm, I’ve been so selfish, milyy (darling). You must be needing me as well.” She mutters between one kiss and another, and you’re almost so distracted by her new dominance over you that you barely notice her hands. Barely. You follow her lead, resting your back on the bed so Wanda can hover over your body. Her fingers move under your shirt, scratching the skin and giving her a nice time feeling you twitch. The way she looks at you is also a lot to handle without shaking.

Suddenly, Wanda pants, eyes diverting to your chest. “Oh, hello you two”. She doesn’t mind your shyness, shamelessly groping your boobs under your shirt. “I missed those.”

You chuckle out of breath, pulling your shirt off while Wanda just stares and plays with them. “I can’t believe you just talked to my boobs.”

She squeezes, pulling the tip until it’s hard under her touch. You bite your lips, to keep your sound under control but you can feel a new wave of warm wetness spreading towards your lower belly. 

“Well, I’ve missed them. It’s been a while, since, you know, you actually had those two.” She so casually talking about it, it’s not that you mind that, but she’s also touching and squeezing them and you’re way too horny to have a conversation.

With very warm cheeks, you try to anyway; “Hm, they usually stay in the way of the job.” Wanda leans down, forcing her head between your breasts, muttering something like so soft and she’s such a dork that you have to chuckle. “It’s just extra work to find the right clothes and then changing every time I need a new face and matching body.”

Despite her clearly interest in your chest, Wanda is listening as she lets you know with a hum of knowledge. But then her mouth envelops one of them and it’s just too much for you to focus on anything else but the feeling of her tongue. You pant to the ceiling, shaky fingers gripping her hair, telling her to keep going but Wanda is such a teasing brat. There’s a small ‘pop’ sound when her mouth lets go, and a trace of saliva still connects your nipple to her lips before Wanda goes for the other one. You squirm a little under her, blushing intensely because she’s such a tease and apparently wants you to beg for it. 

She takes no pity on the ache between your legs; When her mouth leaves your breast again, she has this mischievous sparkle in her eyes that makes you gulp.

“I think I’m a little obsessed with them.” She tells you, giving your tits another squeeze, a little harder this time.

You gasp. “You think?”

“Huh-huh.” She replies, nodding. “You had it on your first night together. Then never again until today. It’s because you miss me sucking them, malysh (baby)?”

You roll your eyes at the words, teasing words evidently. The little cocky smirk that almost makes you go back to being the one in charge. To be completely honest, Wanda was always the one in charge. Even when she allows you to be on top. 

“You’re mistaken, Maximoff.” You retort her while giving her a gentle tug on her thighs, to bring her closer because you really need some kind of pressure between your legs. Wanda doesn’t have to be a mind reader to get the hint - Her knee finds your middle as she straddles your thigh, and she doesn't mind hiding her grin at how you let out an affected sigh at that. “I also had them when I first met you.”

She frowns a little, scrunching her nose in a thoughtful way. You are about to clarify when her knee moves away for her hand to take the spot. And well, you can’t think of saying anything, coherent at least, with Wanda finger’s filling you up so nicely. She seems to be enjoying herself as well - Watching attentively at every strangled noise that escapes you with the consistent pace inside you.

But suddenly as if remembering your previous words, she gaps: “Oh my god, you’re right!” She says, somehow her excitement brings her deeper inside of you. All you can give her as a response is a whine. “You were pretending to be one of the gala’s hosts right? The.. damn, i can’t remember his name-”

“W-wanda..” You meowls, the heat is too much. The way she just keeps pumping in and out of you, and talking about something else as if turning you into a whining mess is nothing, actually makes you throb. 

Wanda just smiles, ignoring your protest to the conversation and quite satisfied with the growing wetness she can feel on her fingertips. “Oh, I remember it now. The host only had daughters, so you did your part. Also one of the few times I saw you in a dress, baby. And what a view that was.” She leans in, whispering soft praises into your ear while you struggle to breathe. It takes you over the edge quickly, and Wanda is rewarded with the sweetest whimper once the knot in your belly explodes - One of your hands grabs her wrist, to keep her there as if she ever thought of leaving. Your hips jerk a few times as you ride the last waves of your climax and Wanda watches all of it, as breathless as you, truly mesmerized by the scene.

When you can breathe again, there are green irises staring at you with adoration. “Hi.”

“Hi you.” It’s your tender reply, and when Wanda leans in to kiss your lips, she can feel your smile. One of your hands moves to her face, gently caressing her skin. Once the kiss is broken, you talk first. “I love you, Wanda.”

You sound so vulnerable, so true, that she swallows. Her gaze focused on your eyes. It’s almost like there’s more to add, at the same time, as if the confession meant even more than just caring about someone. Wanda remembers the first time you said, how you mentioned that she was the first person you ever said that to, and somehow she understands it that it meant that you trusted her very deeply. She bites her lips, withdrawing her fingers from you. She doesn’t miss the soft sigh that escapes you, but she says nothing to that. Wanda is busy taking your wetness to her mouth and sucking her fingers clean. The image is enough to bring not only a strong color to your cheeks but a dark shine to your eyes.

You are ready to break the distance again when knocks on the door break the bubble you two are in completely.

And Captain Rogers's voice from the outside of the room kind of breaks the mood entirely. 

“Hello? I’m… sorry to interrupt. I just need a word. With everyone. Please, huh, join us downstairs?” You and Wanda hide your giggles - The Captain was obviously flustered to call you two, especially judging by the noises Wanda didn’t mind to restrain, probably everybody knew what you two were up to. And it was definitely Natasha’s idea that he was the one who called; the widow was having some fun with her friend's clumsiness.

Wanda cleared her throat, unwillingly taking her attention from you to the door. “We’ll be right out, Steve.”

Once the sound of his footsteps became more distant, Wanda kissed you again. She seemed determined not to move away from you.

-&-

Sergeant Barnes was in Wakanda, undergoing recovery.

When Steve mentioned the country, he looked directly at you, and that was enough for you to know that whatever the king had told him about your adventures there, the captain was on the monarch's side. Not that it mattered all that much.

Consciously or not, while Steve was updating the team, you discreetly scratched the scar you received the last time you were there. If you concentrated, you could remember exactly how painful it was to receive the Wakandian words for thief on your skin.

And seeing the heroes of Earth around you, with inside jokes and personal stories, made you feel very out of place. As if they too could see the scar, even if it was covered by an oversized sweatshirt now.

You swallowed dry and took advantage of the fact that Natasha was finally telling everyone what had kept her busy for the first few weeks on the run, to slip away towards a snack machine.

Wanda followed you with her eyes, aware of all your reactions to the conversations. She just wanted you to feel at ease with the others too, but she knew the opposite feeling well. She was once new to the presence of the Avengers, and they could be rather intimidating. Even the friendliest of them. Maybe it was a superhero thing.

You were deciding between the first and third row when Natasha caught Wanda's eye again. She wanted the witch to be paying attention to the conversation, it seemed important.

The widow took a deep breath. "I never told any of you this, because I thought it was in the past. But... I have a sister. Her name is Yelena Belova and-"

But the news and the shock had to be left for later. A bang from the other side of the common area interrupted Nat's story, and the whole team stood up.

You had just shoved a person hard enough to break the glass of the snack machine. But the attacker's exclamation of pain made you let go immediately.

The masked figure pushed you back harshly, but you laughed in amazement. 

"You weren't supposed to make a scene, you idiot." Complained the woman, massaging her sore shoulder due to the impact. She barely had time to regain her balance and half the Avengers were in fighting position, one particular witch making her take a step back, hiding in your protection.

You acted quickly, gesturing to the heroes to stand down, before throwing one of your arms under the smaller one shoulder.

"Relax, everything's fine!" You declared happily. You tugged at the combat mask she was wearing, revealing the unknown woman's face, which caused her to elbow you, which you ignored. "Meet Layla El-Faouly, my business partner."

The curly-haired woman forced a smile and waved. Wanda was the last of the team to drop her attack position.

-&-

A/F/N-> If you haven't watched Moonknight, please do. Layla El-Faouly is simply incredible. I can't give away too many spoilers for those who haven't seen it, but she's also a thief and a really skilled one. It would be a waste to have an international thief reader who didn't know her.

[ckret2]

Are THEY in universe considered as dreamy and handsome as apparently tumblr users find THEM? If yes, does that have anything to do with how THEY won THEIR elections

VENDOR doesn't strike me as the type of person who feels beautiful or attractive; so I doubt THEY've received much of that kind of attention.

To organics, it probably depends on how much the viewer likes the aesthetics of 1950s kitchen appliances with woodgrain. But they still see THEM like an appliance. So THEIR visual appeal generally caps out at "would buy THEM for the break room; wouldn't invite THEM to the bedroom."

To other machines... I'm going by what's frequently portrayed as attractive in transformers fandom: and unfortunately, THEY've got no real points of articulation; no interesting function-related kibble (no tires, no wings, no treads); very few lights at all; lots of unpainted components in a utilitarian way... Plus I feel like most robots wouldn't be into woodgrain, y'know? It's quirky, but "sticking a banana sticker to your forehead" quirky, not "stylishly avant-garde" quirky.

THEY're probably some people's type (THEY're apparently some tumblr users' type), but not many people's type.

I see THEM as like, equivalent to a middle-aged woman who wears just enough makeup to be considered "acceptable" but has never taken pleasure in the process, and has always worn serious business suits with skirts or button-up shirts with slacks in order to be taken seriously, and keeps trying diets that never stick and whenever she vents about this to her friends they awkwardly reassure her that dieting is hard and it's fine when really she's longing to hear someone say "but you already look great" and feel like they aren't just saying it to be nice; and now she's past her prettiest youthful years but has realized she's never been made to feel beautiful, never made herself feel beautiful, and she's a serious businesswoman so she tells herself that that's frivolous and she shouldn't care but she does care, and it's not shallow vanity to care, because all these years of not caring is a side-effect of viewing her body with an air of disdain and resentment for not being good enough and not being worth the effort to make it good enough; and so she buys a paisley shirt with bright green flowers that she thinks looks outrageous but actually really likes and hopes it will be the start of finally figuring out her style, and aside from the print it's still a respectful button up so surely it's professional enough to wear to work, and all her coworkers are like "wowww, that's... different" and she doesn't know if it's because the shirt's really that ugly on her or if they just aren't used to seeing her as the kind of person who can wear these shirts, when the truth is, they can just tell how deeply uncomfortable she is in this shirt, she doesn't know how to wear clothing she likes without being hyper self-conscious. She doesn't know how to make herself feel beautiful. But she wants to.

And that's why VENDOR got woodgrain paneling.

[kneelingshadowsalome]

We know Konig is more soft on women, but is it all women in general? For example, if some girl was hitting on him, would he be rough with her? Would he ever kill a woman? (if he's on the battlefield - I'm guessing he would if he had to). Is he chivalrous to all women or just his partner?

Yes, König is absolutely super soft to all women in general 🌸

The thing is, women are an exception, a beautiful, pure anomaly in König's worldview. He both worships them and views them as fragile. Women need to be protected from all harm. And at the same time... König goes feral every time he gets to taste and touch and fu–ahem, make love to a woman.

CW: Toxic!König. Sexism. Mentions of canon-typical violence and PTSD. Freudian madness.

Something just snaps, and he doesn't want to hurt his Engel... but he's a bit ADHD, and far too needy, goes a bit crazy every time he sees her. Women's soft skin and plump breasts and hot, wet, silky folds drive him insane. He just wants to drown himself in a woman, hide somewhere deep, somewhere safe, but can't because he's so big and has to act all tough. If he could, if only he was allowed, he would fall asleep every night with his cock buried inside that beautiful, warm, velvet softness.

So König's deeply embedded insecurity and attempts to seek safety are a combination that make him a little unhinged when it comes to women. That's why he can never get enough 😔 Also this man's horrible childhood has made him an adrenaline addict. Chaos is what he's used to, it feels familiar, so there's a risk that König might never settle into safety even if he finds it. He needs a high (which means he needs to kill and he needs sex.)

Female operators are skilled and tough in his eyes, and he trusts their abilities (kind of), but he would always keep a silent lookout, and try to keep them safe. Even if those women looked at him like he's a weirdo. He would always choose to help a woman over helping a man. Men can and have to survive on their own if a lady is in trouble. I know this wasn't asked but He would also never, ever hurt children.

If a woman tried to kill him (on the battlefield) he would be very professional about it. He wouldn't find joy in the killing, though. As odd as it may sound, König would prefer shooting to stabbing when it comes to neutralizing a female target. He wouldn't want to prolong their deaths, and it would make him extremely uncomfortable to knife a woman down. If he has to, he will do it, but the kill would be as quick and clean as possible.

The ones König has killed linger on the precipice of his mind as precious memories, sick fantasies made real. But the women he kills haunt him forever: those deaths sometimes give him nightmares. Especially if they brought even the tiniest bit of satisfaction...

...Because König does go into a mode when he's left with a firearm. He's so excited he sometimes drops mags simply because he's so enthusiastic. Thrill and anxiety mix when he's working, and he feels absolutely marvelous every time he fires a gun and gets to announce "Target down" in the comms. Better yet if he can go on a spree and destroy a whole room full of villains. Noticing later that one or some of them were women would give him a cold feeling in the gut and leave him with a worsening PTSD.

If a woman was violent in other circumstances, meaning outside work/warfare, he would simply seize them as gently and firmly as he can and try to calm them down. König thinks hitting women is just wrong. Even if they were trying to hit him (hitting on, as in flirting with him, now that's a different thing hehe. Not sure if this is what you asked, if so let me know!). It's unmanly and cowardly, and he would kill any guy who hits women, and kill them without mercy.

König's traumatic childhood has put him on a knight's quest to protect all women and children from harm. His mother has greatly influenced the way he sees women overall. At the end of the day, they're creatures who don't know how to defend themselves so he needs to save them.

But then again... These 'Knight in Shining Armor' fantasies should be taken with a grain of salt.

Because seeing a woman under him in a helpless state, looking back at him with cute, wet eyes while he's lodged deep inside is the best thing in the world in König's opinion. He would never deliberately go and hurt a woman... But why then does it feel so good when Engel squeals every time he goes a little too deep? (Always on accident, of course.)

[crimeronan]

thinking about the potential banished hunter princess timeline today, wherein hunter gets trapped in the human realm while luz is still with belos in the demon realm. mainly i'm thinking about the first night when he's volunteered to stay in camila's basement, after vee has revealed Who He Is.

vee's initial panic eventually subsides into confusion and general unhappiness. hunter has been VERY open about the situation with luz, way more than he ever was back when vee was in the dungeons. it's making her uncomfortable to recontextualize him, in no small part because it's been Years since she last saw him. he's probably a little older than her (at least, as far as vee can estimate her own age) but that means he must've been, what. fourteen?? fifteen?? when she last saw him?? and already solely responsible for caring for luz??

that seems like a reasonable and adult position when you're, like, thirteen. and grew up in a torture dungeon. but when you're a freshman in college who's gotten a Lot more experience with well-adjusted peers....

meanwhile camila does NOT want to keep anybody prisoner, but also would be Out Of Her Mind not to acknowledge that hunter is dangerous. AND she knows that he knows luz. vee's confirmed that much is 100% true. camila can't imagine getting into the isles, finding luz, and being like, "yeah, i threw your closest family out into the connecticut cold to fend for himself." Absolutely Not

so. very convenient that hunter volunteers to be imprisoned!!

it does take some time to talk hunter off the ceiling. he's very firmly like "we need to get back to the demon realm Right Now" while camila is like "that's not happening tonight" and he's like "it needs to!!!"

camila: well, it Can't. do you think i wouldn't go to her if i could?? the best thing you can do for her tonight is SLEEP.

hunter grudgingly goes.

camila puts together a stack of extra blankets because the basement can get chilly. and as she's about to bring them downstairs, vee offers her an old squishmallow or pillow pet that camila bought her years earlier. and is like. well, i'd want something to hold onto if i was him. just tell him not to hurt it. then if he DOES destroy it, we'll know what kind of person he is.

camila: baby, are you.... sure...?

vee: it's just a stuffed animal. i don't care <-said while caring deeply, caringly

hunter doesn't expect to sleep. but he also doesn't expect camila or vee to show him any kindness. so when camila explains that the blankets are to keep warm and the pillow pet is because vee wanted him to have a companion, he's like....

....i don't know how human hospitality works. i think i'm ethically obligated to follow you into battle now tho.

so when camila orders him to get some rest, he does.

camila comes down the next morning with the mildest breakfast food she can find, plus a bunch of questions about what witches eat, because she's not going to starve hunter. she finds him sound asleep curled up under all of the blankets, with the pillow pet cradled carefully under his chin. the same way he might hold a real person.

[piratecaptainscaptainpirates]

So you want to write about a Jewish Ed Teach - a quick guide to writing a Jewish man of color, by a Jewish moc

Given Taika Waititi is Jewish, I am always so happy when I see fanfic authors writing about Ed being Jewish! We need more Jewish poc rep and I'm always happy to see it. That being said, I've also seen a lot of misunderstandings, so I wanted to to write up a few quick guidelines.

Disclaimer: I'm just one Jew with an opinion, and this is based on my own experiences! I'd love if other Jews, especially other Jews of color, in the fandom would like to chime in with their thoughts as well!

It is possible to be a Jewish athiest! Judaism is membership in a people, and belief in g-d is not required (and, in my community, it's even considered a very personal question!). Some of the most observant Jews I know are athiests; belief in g-d and level of Jewish observance are not directly correlated. Cannot overstate how common it is for Jews to not believe in g-d or go back and forth on the question.

On that note, there are different levels of Jewish observance. Every individual is different, but in general there's Orthodox (very strict), and then, way on the other side, there's Reform and Conservative (Conservative does not equal politically Conservative). Conservative and Reform are very similar, except the Conservative movement tends to be more observant of traditional Jewish law and uses a lot more Hebrew. If you live in an area without a lot of Jews (like where I live!), it's very common for Reform and Conservative movements to have a lot of overlap and collaborate on a lot of stuff together.

Not every Jew keeps Kosher, or keeps Kosher to the same level of strictness.

Synagogue services are not like Christian services, especially outside of holiday services. Ordinary Saturday morning services are often more like a group conversation as we try to work new meaning out of the Torah. The B'Nei Mitzvah, the big ceremony that marks a kid being old enough to participate fully in Jewish life, is more like "baby's first thesis defense" than anything else! There have literally been pauses in services I've attended before as someone ran to the temple library to check their sources.

Not all Jews speak Hebrew. Some Jews might not know any, some might be able to stumble through the more important prayers, some might be able to sight-read okay, some might only know religious words but not modern words, some might be fluent! Just about any level of proficiency is believable.

Ed's got a lot of tattoos! Tattoos are a big traditional Jewish no-no, but (again!) different movements and different Jews have their own opinions. I know a Conservative tattoo artist! It's not something that other Jews would comment on (unless they're just assholes) and it wouldn't make anyone kick him out of synagogue services (no joke, I read that in a fic once).

Hannukah is not the only (or even the most important) Jewish holiday; it's just the one most non-Jews know about. The two biggest holidays are Rosh HaShanah and Yom Kippur. I think Ed's favorite holidays would be Purim (you get to wear costumes and put on plays!) and Passover (retelling of a story along with a big meal!).

Depending on the area and the Jewish demographic, Jews of color can sometimes feel uncomfortable in our own community, especially when other Jews automatically assume we must be converts. While this is a real issue, it is not something I want to read authors who aren't themselves Jews of color write about because it is a deeply inter-Jewish issue.

Depending on the community you grow up in, religious trauma isn't as common with queer Jews as it is with queer Christians. The Reform movement has been advocating for queer Jews since the 1960s (you read that right, yes). I'm not saying there are no queer Jews who have religious trauma, I'm just saing it's a lot less common, and I have always felt immediately accepted as queer in Jewish spaces.

The inverse is not true. Queer spaces are not always accepting of Jews (or of people of color, a double whammy!).

A few stereotypes to avoid: Jews are often stereotyped as being greedy and corrupt. Jewish kids are bullied by Christian kids because "we killed Jesus," when I was ten I had another kid ask to "see my horns." Always avoid comparing Ed directly to animals, especially rodents.

If you're a non-Jew looking to write about a Jewish Ed, I recommend doing some research. MyJewishLearning is a great website that's very accessible.

Every Jew interacts with our Judaism differently, so if you're writing a Jewish Ed, please take a moment to think about what it means for him! Membership in a community? Calming traditions that remind him of home, family, and community? A point of pride - we're a resilient lot! Even just a note in his background that he's not as connected to as he might like to be?

[scekrex]

Hello ! How are you doing ? Could I ask for an Adam x reader who doesn't know how to say 'no' so Adam is kinda teaching him how to ? Just reader sweating profusely, looking at Adam, who's making big "No no" signs. I live in a community (?) and my asocial ass is /not/ liking it. I generally act like I'm napping when they're calling me (yes they can't see me but I still pretend in case there's invisible cameras) but when it's face to face, oh lord have mercy... I say yes. I hate driving (I'm a bad driver when I have people in my car...).

Thank you if you do it ! <3

As someone who had to learn that saying "no" is not only okay but also important, I love this request so much!! <3 I hope you like it

People Pleasing doesn't rock

pairing: Adam x male!reader

warnings: language

note: not beta read bc fuck you I don't have beta readers

Saying no to things, especially people close to you, has always been a struggle, even during your days on earth. And living in heaven hadn't changed much about it. Well that wasn't entirely true, while living in heaven itself hadn't changed anything about that, Adam had. Or at least he was trying to.

He had started to realize that right when you met him. He had invited you to one of his concerts and while you really wanted to go, big crowds weren't your thing, they usually caused panic. Yet you couldn't bring yourself to say no, so you agreed. It ended with a panic attack for you and overwhelm for Adam and his band mates since none of them had known what to do. Luckily Lute had carried you through it - a thing you were forever thankful for.

Adam's arm was wrapped around your shoulders, his hand held onto yours to spend you comfort. While you were used to heaven and its people, it didn't mean that your panic was kicking in any less. However when you saw a familiar face in the distance, your mood changed a little and you gave them a bright smile, it was one of your closest friends. They walked right towards you and you poked Adam's side as the first man sighed as he noticed them. They weren't his favorite, in his opinion they were too pressuring and talked you into stuff more than they accepted you not wanting to do certain things. But it wasn't his place to tell you who to hang out with so he remained quiet.

“Hey Y/N,” they greeted you with a warm smile and the three of you stopped so that you and them could have a conversation. “Sup, are you doing okay?” They nodded before changing the topic from smalltalk to whatever it was they wanted to talk about, “So you know how I have this project going on?” You thought about it for a moment before you remembered what they were talking about, “Oh yeah, you mean that art project of yours, right? How's it going?” Their face scrunched up unpleasantly and they broke eye contact, “Not well to be honest and I thought-” Adam interrupted them rudely, his hand gave yours a soft squeeze as he spoke, “And you thought he could help you fix the motherfucking mess you created to save your own fucking ass, didn't you?” You looked up at Adam, the LED face of his mask represented the annoyance his voice had given away quite well, it was visible that he was having none of it.

You looked at your friend in front of you, “Is that true?” They seemed uncomfortable with the way Adam had worded their need even though he was right about it, “Well, sort of, I-” Yet again they were interrupted by Adam, “No.” And oh dear mighty Lord you thanked Adam for disagreeing with them. Because while you loved them, they asked for you to correct their mistakes a little too often. “I think Y/N can speak for himself,” they hissed at Adam who simply flipped them off. “Okay, hear it from him yourself then,” he gently squeezed your hand again and offered you a reassuring look. He'd have your back if they wouldn't respect your no, he'd get you out of the situation if you couldn't do it yourself. So you inhaled deeply and muttered, “Sorry, can't help you,” the words were spoken fast, almost too fast to process but your friend had managed to anyway. “But-” Adam's index finger was onto their lips within a heartbeat, shushing them without a word. “He said no, go look for some other fucker who's willing to fix your fucking mistakes,” and with that the first man lead you away from them.

“Thanks,” you mumbled as you rested your head against his upper arm, still walking the streets. “Yeah, don't fucking mention it. But your ass really needs to learn how to stick the fuck up for yourself,” you sighed at his words, knowing he was right. You couldn't agree to anything, that would lead to you doing everyone's work, fixing everyone's life and drowning in your own problems. “But you did fucking great today, so how about we have your favorite dinner later, huh?” And at that you beamed at him, pure joy was visible in your eyes and he loved to see you that way. God help him, he'd do way too much to see you happy.

[henrioo]

°•*⁀➷ YOU'RE TOO SWEET FOR ME: KILLER

꒰ SYNOPSIS ꒱ : "Only him, with his sweet silence, sweet touch and sweet love would convince you to open your heart. He was sweet for his own good... At least he was for you"

꒰ WARNINGS ꒱ : Male! Reader (can be trans or not), gay relationship, homo relationship, cannon au (so pirates duh), some mention about short duration relationships, mentions about lies and promises about relationships, some cool guy trying to rizz the reader (and failing), nothing really triggering

꒰ WC ꒱ : 1,3k

꒰ NOTES ꒱ : I wrote that when I was trying to get back on writing, it was from days ago now, it's not one of my best works but is sweet enough to make me actually like this one. Still in my fight of getting back on writing again so pls have patience with me. Fem, blank blogs and no pronouns = block

You continued drying the glasses behind the counter, while a young boy leaned against it. Big smile, shirt open to show a little of his chest and sleeves rolled up to show off his muscular arms, well-groomed hair and clean clothes. He was here sweet talking and hitting on you a while ago, what was his name again? You didn't make a point of keeping it in your memory.

"You know darling... I'm just trying to say that I know lots of ways we can have fun together" He said looking at you seductively and you held yourself back from looking at him with disgust. That wouldn't be good for business.

"Well you see... I'm a little..." You were cut off when the bar doors opened with some force, it was still early and the place was empty. Besides, of course, the flirty guy.

There he was. A man taller and stronger than anyone else on this island, long blonde hair was on his back, the white helmet with blue stripes prevented anyone from knowing his true intentions while leaving a deadly aura. The soldier of the massacre, one of the worst generation pirates, first mate of a famous pirate crew... Killer.

The man who was flirting with you straightened up and stopped talking, he now seemed nervous and uncomfortable. Of course yes, he could have sweet words but nothing more than that, no one on this island had enough strength to go against the pirates who arrived at the port a few days ago. That's why all the civilians were being cautious, trying their best not to get into trouble, there were no marines on this island and no one wanted to end up dead for angering a dangerous pirate.

“Welcome” You said, and now the smile on his face seemed a little more genuine.

The pirate didn't answer you, he just walked closer to the counter. The way he towered over you and the other man was somehow overwhelming, although you weren't scared by it.

"Are you busy?" He said, a serious tone that could have sounded like a threat, although you knew it was his calm voice.

You looked at the other man, the flirty idiot, silently asking what his next move would be. Would he fight for his right to flirt with you? Of course not, he immediately swallowed deeply and ran out of the bar, not bothering to say goodbye to you. How embarrassing...

"I hope I'm not scaring your clients," Killer said as he sat down at the counter.

"You guys definitely are, no one wants to come over for a drink and risk running into the infamous Kid Pirates" You smiled at him, joking about the situation, then filled a glass with beer, added a straw and offered it to him. "You came back."

“Good for me, less annoying drunks to deal with” he huffed accepting the glass, after a few seconds of drinking through the straw he looked at you. Although you couldn't see his eyes, you knew he was looking at you deeply. "I said I would come back."

“You said,” You smiled, cheeks hot as you turned away, pretending to organize plates, glasses, and other things, just to avoid looking at him.

"So? Do you have your answer?" He said as he rested his arms on the counter.

“I…” You bit your lip nervously. You had been working as a bartender for many years, your uncle was old and could no longer take care of the bar so this became your job.

You learned to appreciate the bar over time, it was tiring, but you lived your little adventure here. Among the drunk locals and visitors you were able to hear stories, meet people and discover islands. It was like traveling without leaving your place, you met a lot of people, you even made some friends, you had some passions, but you knew that all the visitors would leave. This made you not get lost in promises and sweet words, you needed something stable, someone who would always be with you regardless of the situation... And not promises without truths.

Of course, this fell apart when Killer arrived, his carefree manner, his acidic humor, his responsibility and independence. He was a man like no other, just a light laugh from him or a touch from his calloused hands could make you sleepless for hours. It even seemed like a joke the way he was able to disarm you so easily, he spoke so little and wore a mask that prevented you from seeing his face, how did he have so much power over you?!

And it turned out that you weren't the only one interested, it seemed that the blonde had also paid a lot of attention to you in the last few days. Everything he did with you was more than purposeful, the flirtations too subtle to leave you confused, the touches that seemed accidental, even when he stayed with you until the end of the night and took you to his house. All this just to be able to approach you subtly and not make you run away from him.

And it worked... Well, for the most part, since two days ago, when he admitted that he was very interested in you and would like to go on a date, you simply froze. White head, dry throat, limp body, it was as if you had forgotten how to act like a functional human! You weren't a child! You had already dealt with romance before, so how was it possible for him to completely dismantle you? Passing through all your barriers without any effort!

In the end you asked for some time to consider the request, for the two days you wondered if he would really come back... Maybe it was just a joke? Would he change his mind? You were nervous about all the possibilities. However, as soon as you saw him entering the bar, just like he always did, sitting and talking to you... his body found peace.

You weren't nervous anymore, your heart wasn't beating strangely anymore, you felt light and a little dizzy. You felt safe next to him... This was so embarrassing because because they were internal reactions he wasn't even able to see what he was doing to you!

"Then?" You could almost hear his smile, damn proud bastard, he always knew what his answer was, didn't he?

"Well..." You turned around, crossing your arms and trying to go back to being the harsh and aggressive man that some knew you to be. "If you're determined to tarnish your reputation as a fearsome pirate by going out with some random man who owns a bar..."

"An extremely attractive man" He corrected you and you swallowed deeply.

"Right, with an extremely attractive man like me... I couldn't pass you up and turn down that compliment..." You smiled looking at him.

"Lucky me" He stood up "And a shame for you, because when I like someone I'm not letting them go so easily..."

"Oh yeah? That would be a problem... After all, I live here and you're leaving in a few days" You said. Although this was a strange feeling for you, this had never happened before with any other lover, you had never wanted to leave everything behind and run away with someone. But with Killer you wanted it.

"No problem... I'm a pirate, I can just rob you" He said confidently.

"It's not stealing if I agree to go along, right?" You said, getting out from behind the counter and walking over to him.

"No... But what fun is it to say that you came of your own free will?" He said amusedly as he ran his hand around your waist and moved to your back, gently guiding you to get closer to him. You just laughed letting him guide you, it seemed like now you were going to have adventures again, but this time not stuck behind a bar counter. No, no... You will now experience them personally, with someone very interesting by your side.

[vole-mon-amour]

In A Like Supreme it's Kerry's "You wanna hear a new— He's... gone, isn't he?" & "How was the gig? (...) Damn shame I had to miss it" "Eeehh, can still come to my show."

It's the disappointment in Kerry's voice and him wanting to spend more time with Johnny, not talk to him through V. "Voices out of the grave." What I noticed this time around is how Kerry is ready to share any unfinished material with Johnny.

For example, Kerry plays V that yacht song as a way to show his trust and his gratitude to V (and granted, it happens after you help him multiple times, so character development is happening), but right after the concert I'm pretty sure Kerry doesn't have a finished song. He wants to share that material with Johnny because he trusts Johnny and wouldn't mind his input, too. He still sees Johnny as his best friend that he loves dearly.

In Phantom Liberty, when you ask Kerry about his album, he tells you that it's still too raw and he isn't ready. Even at the time of A Like Supreme, it's "You can come to the show" aka Kerry's way of saying, you can hear me singing and playing but only at the show. When I'm at my best. When I'm ready.

While what I'm sure would happen with Johnny is that Kerry would invite Johnny home/to the studio (which is often the same thing since I'm sure some things Kerry records at home) and share that raw material with him (and they could create the music together).

Johnny tells Kerry that he "won't play without you, wouldn't be the same". Kerry answers, "I see what you're doing here, but I'm still plannin' on playing."

Which is yeah, Johnny wants in, but there's a reason he didn't let Kerry leave the band. He knew he needed Kerry. So it's quite mutual, actually, even though Kerry established his solo and is quite confident in it after that:

He's relieved he no longer has this burden of waiting for Johnny, of expecting him to come back and feel like he's walking on a knife's edge while on that; of proving himself to the crowd and to Johnny when Johnny does come back. Which doesn't mean he wouldn't want to share his love for music with Johnny again.

Their relationship is complicated. They and their love for each other is deeply rooted in them & they'll always be a part of each other's lives.

And while I'm on A Like Supreme, boyfriends' guns next to each other:

Both loved Samurai very much. Both can't live without music. Both are very similar. Both, in some way, are still best friends.

Though I find it funny that Kerry's gun costs more. There's no way to get both at the same time, and to me it looks like a pointer into Kerry's expensive attitude. Money's never an issue while one of the first commentaries that Johnny makes upon entering Kerry's villa is "Hope it was expensive at least."

Your best friend did fine, Johnny, and all without you. And all while waiting for you to come back and missing you. And all while thinking about you every single day ever since you "disappeared".

UPD: Also, when you read Kerry's messages on his laptops, he offers his ex to choose a trip with the kids and for him to pay for her trip. I'm not exactly set on what I think about that��whether he doesn't want to spend time with his children or his ex makes him THAT uncomfortable so that he offers a "bribe". You do that, I'll pay. The same goes for his car and the Samurai-like painting—money is not an issue, just don't try to screw me over.

Plus, when in PL ending V wakes up from a 2 year coma, the first thing Kerry offers is eddies. I don't know, but the topic of money is threaded in him and in the things he owns. Including, obviously, the gun that he owns and very generously gifts to V like it's nothing (because, for him, it kind of is. He can always make a replica if he need to.)

[prince-liest]

Since someone was brave enough to ask you for advice on characterising Vox (And obviously feel free to just ignore this if you don’t feel like answering) but I’m working on a fic with a concept you’ve written yourself before (it’s an Alastor in rut fanfic. Original, I know) but what I wanted to write was him stalking Vox and acting hot and cold (starts a fight on one occasion, is being too nice another time, all that jazz)

I wanted Voxy to be somewhat disturbed by it since usually it’s him doing the stalking, not the other way around, but I’m having a hard time imagining how he’d react at being complimented on his physical appearance, by Alastor nonetheless. What do you think?

Firstly, I am a strong proponent of the "Two cakes!!!!" model of creating fanworks, ehehe. I'm also far from the first person to write a rut fic, I'm sure, and I'm delighted that more people are doing it!

Secondly, I think one of the really fun things about writing Vox interacting with Alastor is that, at least the way I interpret him, even when he's on the back foot and uncomfortable, he's... still really invested in Alastor, in one way or another. I think it kind of depends on what degree of 1) down bad and 2) common sense going out the window when it comes to Alastor you want to write him as, but I'd personally think it would be fun to land it anywhere in the range of like:

Disbelieving for about two second but willing to stomp down on the disconcerted feeling this is giving him in favor of not looking a gift horse in the mouth and instead picking all the way up what Alastor is putting down (which backfires tremendously when Alastor flips back to "cold" later).

Deeply nervous laughter because he knows this is weird, but he can't help but functionally pull a, "...Wait, but, like - like, actually? HAH! I knew you'd see the light! Oh, shit, hold on, ow, ow, ow, watch the claws - "

Suspicion! So much suspicion, this seems out of character for Alastor, what is he up to, it's clearly a plot of some sort, he has to figure it out, ideally by also stalking Alastor even more aggressively.

Regardless of what direction you take it, though, I think he'd get flustered in a way that he wouldn't if literally anybody else complimented him. Just takes him out at the knees in a way he does not expect. And, in general, I think Vox is a smart guy that would absolutely get that something is up and he should be wary, but the fun part is pitting that intelligence against the way his common sense train violently derails and subsequently explodes into shrapnel when Alastor is involved.

Somewhere between terrified and suspicious depending on Alastor's methodology, yet always, always flattered. He's a weirdo and he deserves this.

[strawbubbysugar]

So uuuuuhh I was daydreaming in class today and I was imagining a scenario with Arche, so I'm curious about how this hypothetical in a different timeline/universe would play out! This is in the context of Elio still being on the front lines and the arrangement going as it's supposed to. Also this scenario would probs be years before the wedding, if that makes a difference. Here's the scene:

~~~

Arche's betrothed (not necessarily Dahmia, unless her personality is different in this world, up to you!) goes to Arche's tower and knocks on the door.

"Enter." Arche's voice is as grumpy as it usually is.

They enter the tower, closing the door behind them and standing in the middle of the room, holding themself for comfort.

"What is it?" Arche asks in a somewhat blunt manner, raising an eyebrow.

"I...I wanted to ask you something." They say quietly, not looking at him.

"Go on, then. Out with it," Arche says impatiently.

"Is...is it possible for me to somehow transfer my soul into a body built similar to yours? Perhaps...after the wedding?"

Arche's eyes widen, brows furrowed. "What-"

"We're stuck in this arrangement," They interrupt him. "Whether we like it or not. And..." Their eyes fall to the floor as they try not to get emotional.

"I don't want you to feel disgusted whenever you're around me."

Arche's face falls slightly as they continue, but he keeps his expression as neutral as he can.

"You're right," His betrothed chuckles emptily, almost embarrassed. "Humans are gross. We get sick, we have bodily fluids, weird smells, whatever. You were right as a child, and you're right now. I remember all of those times you made comments about my 'gross human stuff'."

They finally lift their eyes to meet Arche's gaze, their eyes slightly watering. "I don't want you to have to deal with that for the rest of your days. Hell, I don't want to deal with it either."

They take a step towards Arche, their face contorting to one of slight worry and sadness. "When we wake up in bed together, I don't want you to feel uncomfortable being close to me. When we have to kiss in front of everyone, I don't want you to have the feeling of wanting to jump out of the window in disgust. When we work together as rulers, I don't want you to keep your distance from me because you don't want to be around a 'filthy human'."

Arche thinks back to all of the times he made comments about humans being gross or disgusting when they both were young kids. He realizes now it's all manifesting into this very moment, and he's not sure what to say.

"Arche," They step a little closer, but give him fair space. "I know you hate this arrangement. I know you don't like me very much. I can handle that, honestly. Despite caring deeply for you, I can handle you not reciprocating that. But the thought of you being disgusted every moment you're close with me..." They shake their head, as if doing so would somehow rid them of the anxiety. "I can't stand it."

"I thought maybe...maybe I could make it more bearable for you if I wasn't human anymore. I want to make this arrangement the most pleasant it can possibly be for you. I know the whole point of us marrying is to unite the kingdoms, so it wouldn't make much sense if I wasn't human anymore. But...I don't know." They scoff in cold amusement, holding their head as they laugh at themselves. How silly. Why did they think it would be a good idea? Stupid. "I thought maybe...nevermind. I...I'm sorry."

They turn around and walk as fast as they can towards the tower's exit. "I shouldn't have said anything. I'm sorry for bothering you."

~~~

Sooooo yeah. I was imagining what I would do if I were in the arrangement with Arche, and I would feel soooo self-conscious after the whole "humans are smelly" thing during the dance, and just general comments/teasing every time I would sneeze or cough or something like that lol. Kinda like this moment in chapter 22 (Cubbies):

"At the mention of eating and feeling full, her stomach growled, as if to interject in the conversation. Her face flushed and she cleared her throat, hoping that he didn’t hear it. While around Beck she wouldn’t have been phased by such a small, human thing, being around an Atomaton it almost felt like admitting a weakness."

I was like "whoooa that's relatable af, i'd totally feel the same way" and then ended up daydreaming that scenario in class a couple hours later lol.

What do you think Arche would do in this hypothetical situation?

Sorry if this is kinda weird to ask about T_T

Awh this is so sweet!!! Def would be a y/n/other hypothetical princess rather than Dahmia, Dahmia (while occasionally embarrassed about human details) knows the significance of her being human and wouldn’t trade her body. She is very curious about it after seeing Cas, but if someone offered, she would decline.

I think in this hypothetical Arche would start to feel guilty about all the teasing he did as a child, and try to subtly make up for it without going out of his way to apologize. Complimenting how you smell, making a comment about how ‘interesting’ and ‘unique’ human biology is. He’d try to be slick about it so you don’t think he’s lying for your sake while trying to change your mind at the same time.

[my-mt-heart]

Thoughts on TBOC Trailer

I'm issuing another trigger warning (for mention of abuse) and another gentle reminder that if you're happy with the trailer, then I’m genuinely happy for you. This post will not resonate with you though, so I encourage you to keep scrolling or to just block me. I really won't be offended. If you aren't happy with the trailer or you're still processing the trailer, well, let's talk about it...

There are three major issues for me. The first is the way it positions the story as Daryl's despite all the promises offscreen that it would be Carol's story this season. He gets the first appearance, the name drop, and the spotlight in 90% of the shots while Carol's side of things is like an undercurrent. I love Daryl. I love that he has his own spinoff to explore his character more deeply, but this is supposed to be Carol's spinoff equally. She may not have been marketed as much as Daryl has been over the years, but her popularity and Melissa's critical acclaim have more than earned the same amount of narrative space that Daryl has. Her being sidelined in S11 and then removed entirely from the Caryl spinoff upset an entire fanbase.

Finding out about Carol's/Melissa's return on the other hand offset that pain and started generating (organic) buzz for the show, so it baffles me that AMC wouldn't keep following that path to maximize viewership. If TBOC really is Carol's story, and I'm not saying she won't end up having the most screentime, why wouldn't they want to sell that to the Carol/Caryl fans who left, the Carol/Caryl fans who feel uncertain about the storytelling (hi 👋) and the GA who love Carol, but may not realize she's back because all the media coverage keeps leaving out "TBOC" and using Daryl as the thumbnail? When you have something amazing, like Melissa's acting and Carol's story development and Caryl's chemistry, then it only makes sense to show it off. But instead, the positioning triggered my fear of Carol being sidelined again, of her being treated as insignificant to Daryl's story and the story overall. Whether that's valid or irrational, it's still not the visceral reaction I want to have when I thought I was being treated to the epic return of the character who taught me everything I know about resilience and strength.

My second issue is the heavy-handed positioning of Daryl, Isabelle, and Laurent as a nuclear family, not just when Daryl tells Laurent that he and Isabelle want to take him to America, but the classic American image right after that of the three of them playing baseball together. Whether it's a misdirect or not—I'm having a hard time figuring out which to be honest because I know Zabel and Nicotero are more than capable of taking it in a direction that might seem wildly absurd from our POV—I'm very uncomfortable with any representation of Daryl in a manipulative relationship/friendship/nun-ship, especially if the manipulation isn't going to be addressed. And I don't expect it to be addressed going off of what Zabel and Norman have been saying about Daryl needing to open up his heart to his new family.

I have to refrain from giving out any personal details about myself on my blog, but I'll share this because I think it provides important context for my position on Daryl and Isabelle (trigger warning). I was terrified of my dad when I was a kid. He wasn't a monster like Ed or Daryl's dad, but when he was angry—and he was angry a lot—he was mean and loud and destructive. That was my frame of reference for how men naturally behave, for almost all of my adolescent life. When I started watching TWD, I recognized some of my dad's worst qualities in Daryl at first, but then Daryl grew in ways my dad never could. He overcame his predisposition as an angry redneck because he "opened up his heart" to Carol and saved all of the violence/aggression for killing zombies and fighting villains (usually). When Isabelle accused him of being like his dad to get him to stay in France (106), it cut deep because Daryl isn't anything like his dad. He's not an abuser. He's not selfish. He doesn't abandon anyone or intentionally hurt the people he cares about. He's the male role model I never had. A man of honor who deserves to be loved by someone who sees that without a doubt. Carol sees that. She was the first person to help him nurture that, whereas Isabelle keeps him in the cycle of abuse by gaslighting him into becoming a father figure to a kid he barely knows. So unless the EPs are telling a clear story about that, which they aren't, they're just glorifying toxic/abusive relationships.

Caryl is the relationship that fans have invested in for more than a decade. It's one of the most iconic relationships on television for a reason. They represent hope for their fans, some having endured hardships in their own lives similar to Daryl's and Carol's. Their fans seek comfort in a love story between two damaged, middle-aged people who thought they couldn't heal from their trauma and thought they weren’t worthy of love. Their fans have every right to expect Caryl-centric storytelling in a show that's being marketed as a Caryl show (see AMC's hashtags), especially considering they've had to wait more than two years after some assholes underestimated Melissa's value to the franchise.

I personally went into SDCC wanting to know what I could look forward to for Caryl's shared arc in addition to their individual arcs. I think a lot of people did judging by all the questions they dropped on AMC's/TWD's social media accounts leading up to the con. Side note: All of those questions were ignored in favor of questions geared toward TWD fanboys. We only got the tease at the very end of the trailer, and that tease doesn't tell us anything new. Only that, once again, it's Daryl's story and Carol is in the periphery. We already know Caryl are going to reunite. We've known for over a year and even for those who don't track filming updates, it's not a difficult conclusion to come to. The trailer can't spoil how and when and what happens after, but it can show us how Daryl and Carol remain spiritually tethered despite being physically separated. It didn't do that. It played on anxieties instead of desires, which is both tiresome and unethical.

My last issue, which we've been talking about for a while now, is the excessive friendship positioning. Yes, Daryl's and Carol's bond is rooted in a deep friendship. No, it doesn't mean they can't also be romantic. But when that word shows up in every tweet, every synopsis, and every interview, it's not only deliberate, it's targeting a specific viewership and judging by Melissa's mandated (yeah, mandated) use of it as well, I think it's less about telling Caryl fans to set their expectations (AMC thinks we're already guaranteed viewers), and more about trying to appeal to dudebros/fanboys, which is ridiculous because those fans aren't going to invest long-term anyway, not without a catalyst for more Rick stories and action-adventure stories that aren’t in Zabel's wheelhouse. It's just going to make a portion of the fanbase who will invest long-term less hopeful for what they want, plus erase the romantic potential for the GA to see. It's obviously not wrong for AMC to try to maximize their viewership. It is wrong to invalidate the profitable viewership that they have in the process. I have no idea if the show intends to surprise Caryl fans with canon by the end of the season or if certain EPs will get their way, but I do know I can't make any sense of a platonic friendship for Caryl. Insisting on that would be a huge retcon for me. A dealbreaker, as I’ve always said.

AMC started off on the right track with the very first teaser we got, showcasing the significance of Caryl's relationship in the tagline, "To find home is to find each other.” The SDCC trailer feels like we've taken three giant steps backward. I came out of it feeling like the story Zabel, Nicotero, and some faction of AMC want to tell isn't for me, that my favorite characters aren't for me unless I'm willing to forfeit my understanding of them to make the fanboys and certain EPs feel justified in their biases. It doesn’t feel good.

That’s all of my SDCC coverage for now. I appreciate everyone for giving me the space to voice my honest opinions. It might be a buzzkill, but it’s the only way for AMC to properly assess what’s working and what’s not working for their audience 🤷🏻‍♀️

[bijoumikhawal]

you mentioned julian getting sexualy assaulted, do you mean the alien impersonating jadzia in if wishes were horses? I think I've also seen several people talk about how 'creepy' julian's sexual fantasy of jadzia is... there absolutely should be discussions of his misogyny but shouldn't they be focused on his behavior and words and not his unconscious (he was literally sleeping having a dream) sexual fantasy... which only gets revealed to jadzia when the privacy of his mind is violated and someone pretends to be her and tries to have sex with him under false pretenses, a.k.a. sexual assault. idk, there seems to be some underlying assumption that men always enjoy and want sex which is kind of the main argument of rape apologia with men as victims and women as perpetrators. and of course it's also based on the patriarchal ideas of manhood that create rape culture that leads to horrific sexual assault statistics with women as victims and men as perpetrators. sorry for rambling it just made me uncomfortable and I'm glad to see someone point it out (if I correctly understood which episode you were talking about).

I also remembered that in one of the mirror universe episodes sisko has sex with mirror! jadzia who doesn't know that it's not her sisko. that it's another person. and it's such a throwaway moment that feels like it was written in just to be edgy and sexy. bad writing choice lol

no that's exactly the episode and EXACTLY!! EXACTLY!!! Not only that but people are weird about Julian being queercoded in relation to that scene- I've seen comments like "he moans like a woman" and implying him not being okay with being felt up in his sleep and trying to get the person he thinks is Jadzia to back off him means be doesn't like women. As well as uncritically accepting Jadzia's perception of the other Jadzia as submissive, which she is not lmao. If she was Julian wouldn't have to literally sprint to get away from her touching him later in the episode.

I actually don't watch most mirrorverse episodes because they make me fall asleep during them, which is the worst criticism I can have of something I'm watching when I'm not trying to sleep. But in general, Star Trek includes a lot of sexual violence in various forms that it does not understand as sexual violence on a Doylist level. It's kind of interesting in a fucked up way because Jake is preyed on by adult women in two episodes; one where the writers clearly don't understand he's a victim, and another where they do. There isn't a consistency in understanding which I suppose is the hazard of many writers. But something that especially frustrates me because it resembles my own trauma is how mad people get when you talk about the specific dynamic of women assaulting men in Trek, because it happens A LOT. There's both a resistance to acknowledging that particular dynamic of violence in society, but people are also desperate for Trek to be progressive 100% of the time, to the point of derailing conversations about when it isn't and being deeply condescending.

[noisytenant]

finished onimai.

overall a "cute" show that surprised me in a few ways and, barring the moments i'll complain about in a second, generally "feel-good"/"wholesome". very little meaningful conflict, which appeals to some. has a certain magnetism (my partner ended up transfixed watching it over my shoulder at one point).

however, i really wish the scene with sleepwalking momiji were Not There in the final episode... it sunk my feelings about the story as a whole.

throughout, there were some uncomfortable nonconsensual/dubiously-consensual interactions, but they're mostly framed in that kind of lighthearted way that's common with more ecchi anime. on a meta level i do take issue with this kind of humor, but i guess when you're used to it, it doesn't tank the mood. it limited my ability to rank it above a certain threshold, but it's kind of what i expected.

and i guess overall, lots of times these scenes come across as "baby seal afraid of water" situations--mahiro is interested in makeup but too shy/stubborn to ask about it, so kaede takes the lead, etc. i think those forceful but framed-as-harmless moments contribute to the fantasy of being surrounded by supportive people who give you the resources to live your ideal Girl Life. The "force" in "forcefem".

but when there's groping, peering, etc... the sleepwalking thing... genuinely just kind of harrowing and unnecessary when it's played for laughs. and i don't like that scene being one of the last big interactions between mahiro and momiji, who are kind of the main "couple".

i guess ultimately i'm not deeply into hyper-fluff stories. i feel like there's points of interest that i wish were further explored or played with (like mihari's feelings of responsibility for mahiro, momiji's gender, etc.) i don't mind these kind of "fanservice" violation moments when it feels like there are actual emotional consequences. i would not have minded more conflict LOL! but i think i'm just not the target audience.

i can't really recommend it at this time, unless gender bender stories are your niche, and you're fine with loli fanservice. that being said, the level of detail and beauty in the animation continues to tickle me (mahiro foot animation budget 1million). would like to see more in this style, probably wouldn't jump at a chance to see season 2, and probably won't pick up the manga. Peace

[patricide1885]

Thinking back to that position I declined. My secretly being drawn to doing animal research because its a opportunity to do brain surgery is probably super fucked up. And I'm drawn to the idea of growing out of my superstitions and becoming closer to reality of reality if that makes sense. Like hunting and knowing that you could if you had to instead of cowering. Like an establishment of capability and competence and courage.

Lab worker subreddit people were saying it's important for empathetic people to take these roles because empathetic people can usually only stand 3 year stints and without empathetic people frivolous research will be done and conditions would deteriorate.

I feel a third of people think this is pure evil, another third has no idea why I'd even be bothered by this at all, and middle third would have a completely different opinion depending on how it was presented.

I genuinely feel completely split, like there are two people in me, one that is very pragmatic and sees no problem with this and is even excited by the idea and an other who is basically horrified that I am eating meat also and thinks all suffering must be prevented at all costs, and the way the world works in general is untenable.

And a false self that is just afraid of being a bad person, or being seen as a psychopath.

I don't know who I could talk about this with who wouldn't judge me, my therapist was switching between convincing me it was ok and necessary, but when I made it clear how deeply I thought about this and my knowledge about the extent of rats cognitive skills I think she got uncomfortable because most people do this because they simply don't think in the first place, so if it's cruelty, it can be explained as ignorance. People are more comfortable with people that lie to themselves and act instinctually.

[navree]

I saw your post from a while ago were you rewrote hotd using the vague outline of the show can i ask what your ideal hotd season 1 would be like keeping the same episode count but ignoring everything else???

So, I'm gonna assume that by HOTD you do still mean the vaguest "it's about the Dance of Dragons" plot because honestly my ideal HOTD show would have been a Conquest show because those are my babies and I have a LOT of thoughts and it's a crying shame that HBO did not hire me for it (which I can get into in how I'd make that show if you want, lol). But, assuming we're doing the Dance, then I'll explain how season 1 would go from my perspective.

(also apologies, I just got back from a sushi restaurant with my mother and I'm two cocktails deep so there may be some grammatical errors)

Episode One - I'll just link back to what I wrote in this response, because that's still the same. I actually really like the bones of the show, especially changing the Rhaenicent relationship to make it what it is, I think that is more interesting for a longform narrative like a TV show. But basically, the pilot is entirely the same except for the fact that 1) Daemon and Mysaria get an introduction that's just them observing one of Mysaria's customers behind a curtain, being voyeuristic and conniving but not engaging themselves and 2) there is no prophecy. Verbatim from my first response: "I'm not against the idea that Aegon might have had ulterior motives beyond simple Conquest, and we know that Targaryens are capable of having prophetic abilities, but no this should not have been a secret passed down through generations for some fucking reason because that's stupid. And most importantly, considering that HOTD needed to succeed in spite of Game of Thrones, not because of it, because of how awful the last season was and how immediately it faded from the public consciousness and stopped being relevant as a result, the show should honestly not be so frequently be calling back to a disappointing aspect of the show. "A Targaryen must be seated on the Iron Throne" ok but she wasn't and the Long Night ended because some rando had a good ten yard jump according to D&D cuz they wanted to "subvert expectations" stop reminding me of that if I want to be enjoying this new show." Not to mention that it doesn't make sense because the succession was shot to Hell almost immediately for the Targaryens, Aenys likely would have passed that secret down to Aegon the Uncrowned, who died before he could tell anyone anything, Jaehaerys was an unlikely heir, he didn't know about any prophecy, God this was dumb. Also, again, Rhaenys would get her own introduction, I imagine maybe visiting her cousin Aemma as she nears labor when Viserys comes in, ranting about something that happened at the Small Council, where Rhaenys gets an opportunity to show better political acumen and make it clear that Viserys was the wrong choice for the crown.

Episode Two - This is the first episode where we hear Otto talk to Alicent about going to the king for comfort, that would be nixed from the first episode. As with the show, we see that Alicent is deeply uncomfortable with this, and there's gonna be a lot more emphasis on Viserys's own manipulation and how it parallels modern ways men groom young girls, talking about not telling anyone cuz they wouldn't understand, pointing out Alicent's maturity especially when compared to Rhaenyra (who is her age), etc. Meanwhile, the plot on Dragonstone is one that Daemon and Mysaria hatch together, albeit for different reasons (Daemon to get Viserys's attention, Mysaria because she can see that tensions might be starting to boil over and wants to protect herself as best she can). The pregnancy is a fake, but the only one who really starts to think that is the Velaryons, particularly Rhaenys. She would get a scene at Driftmark with Corlys, to showcase again that she's really in touch with politics, where she believes that this is both a ploy to shore up power and get Viserys's attention, while both Corlys and her children listen in (this will be important later). Rhaenyra, meanwhile, is clearly struggling with her role as heir, and we'd get scenes showcasing that no one really takes her seriously and even Viserys still just sees her as a cupbearer rather than an heir. The only person, ironically, who really seems to want to help her and who she leans on for support in learning how to do things, like appointing Kingsguard knights (which happens same as the show), is Otto. She really leans on Otto, as not just the Hand of the King but her friend's father, who she believes has her best interests at heart. The episode still ends the same though, with Viserys announcing in Council, in front of Rhaenyra (though he's never consulted her this time) that he will marry Alicent, to her shock and horror.

Episode Three - Not to be self-indulgent, but the bulk of this episode is going to be like my fic Spring's End, because I was correct in everything I wrote here so go read that also because I wrote it in like two days and it somehow turned out semi-coherent. That's the main crux of the episode, focusing on Alicent's reaction and really hammering home things like Viserys's inappropriate behavior, Otto's love in conflict with his ambition, and the tension between her increasingly important but isolated status at court, as well as starting the sort of Lancelot and Guinevere relationship she will have with Criston. Meanwhile, Rhaenyra is spiraling, hard, about the fact that her father is marrying her friend and still not taking her seriously, along with feeling like she was duped by Otto in that he allowed her to depend on him while seemingly scheming to get someone else on the throne in her place. And it's in this mindset that Rhaenyra decides to go to Dragonstone to confront Daemon herself, without any backup. The two have a heated verbal confrontation about Daemon's antics, and Viserys naming Rhaenyra heir, and even the fact that it doesn't matter, because he's marrying Alicent Hightower, and Rhaenyra has a moment where she tells him that Alicent will likely have sons, and Daemon will never be heir. This clearly cuts to Daemon, and he just decides to give up the dragon eggs and turns away. Rhaenyra has scored a victory, and she feels triumphant, but also hollow (foreshadowing). Daemon meanwhile decides to send Mysaria away, and it's left debatable how much is just because his plan failed and also because he does feel he's put her in danger for nothing, and decides to go to Driftmark. Back at King's Landing, Viserys learns of what Rhaenyra has done during dinner, and summons her to lambast her about it, before Alicent cuts in and points out that Rhaenyra diffusing the situation, while careless, did avoid a conflict that could hurt innocent civilians (this would precipitate the semi-reconciliation that shows up later). Viserys here is clearly torn between a sort of pride in his daughter, but also feeling that she behaved badly, and Rhaenyra is still angry at him but wants his approval. On Driftmark, Daemon and Corlys disparage Viserys and make plans to at least go deal with the Triarchy, which, while not hyped up nearly as much in the show, has at least been mentioned. Daemon also has a moment with Laena Velaryon, who here is the same age as Alicent and Rhaenyra. They notice Vhagar in the distance, talk about dragons and freedom, and Laena makes plain that she intends to claim a dragon for herself, as her mother's daughter, even dropping names like the Cannibal, which certainly piques Daemon's interest. The wedding between Viserys and Alicent goes off, though we are getting that deleted scene where Rhaenyra helps Alicent get ready, because I really wish we could have seen that or at least been told it happened before I wrote Spring's End.

Episode Four - Queen Alicent is pregnant, near term, and the court is alight with speculation as to whether it will be a princess or a prince. Rhaenyra is unsure of how to feel about it, and is trying to navigate the friendship, uncertain though it is, with the fact that Alicent is now the queen. She's gotten closer to Criston Cole, who seems to be primarily on bodyguard duty for the queen or the princess depending on the day, as well as Laena Velaryon, who is at court with her mother, who has informally taken Corlys's place on the Small Council now that he's in the Stepstones with Daemon; this is another way to show that Rhaenys is better at this than Viserys, and there are even moments where the Council is more in agreement with her than him. Meanwhile, the Stepstones aren't gonna be touched on much beyond maybe the final battle and some occasional references, except to show Daemon's military prowess and also Corlys's brilliance in strategy, as well as Corlys's frequent correspondences with Rhaenys, to highlight their cohesion. Meanwhile, in King's Landing, the Strongs have also arrived at the capital. Rhaenyra sees Harwin doing, idk, horse stuff or something medieval and masculine, and is quite taken with him, and they strike up some conversations. Larys, with his disability, finds himself interacting with the ladies of court most, especially Alicent, and the two form a sort of friendship surrounding engaging each other's minds, and they both enjoy that they're the only ones who seem to treat the other as an actual person, rather than the pregnant wife or the disabled second son. Rhaenyra's frank and open conversations with Harwin, on the other hand, embolden her, and we get that scene where she seduces Criston, and there's a lot more play with the fact that Criston is interested and does want it, but is held back by vows before giving in to desire (also, we're just going to put a lot more emphasis on Criston's religious convictions in this version of the show, especially during his convocation in episode two when he joins the Kingsguard). Towards the end of the episode, Alicent goes into labor. Viserys and Rhaenyra share a bonding moment about their worries for Alicent's safety and the reminders of Aemma and what happened to her, and for a moment it looks as though Viserys is goign to tell Rhaenyra what he did to her mother. Rhaenyra also gets a moment where she holds Alicent's hand during labor, and we see her simultaneous love for Alicent in that as well as her clear discomfort with the concept of this being her own fate. And then Alicent delivers a son, a direct challenge to Rhaenyra's claim.

Episode Five - A big thing that's going to happen in this episode is that this is where Laena claims Vhagar. She's at Driftmark for it (foreshadowing) and, given that we've seen her in episodes three and four, it becomes clear that Vhagar is following Laena specifically. So we get to see the claiming, and Laena's own power in that. That's something that, as Daemon returns to Driftmark with Corlys, he's going to learn about, and he's going to be very intrigued by that, and taken with Laena. Another thing we're going to see is Corlys's negotiations with allies he made in Essos during his time away, arranging a betrothal between Laena and the son of the Sealord of Braavos. Rhaenyra's plotline, on the other hand, is going to be about her asserting her own power, especially now that her father has a trueborn son named Aegon Targaryen, which is a direct threat. She has a moment with her father where she directly tells him that, as his heir, she's not just going to be his cupbearer, but deserves a seat at his Small Council. He acquiesces, and Rhaenyra butts heads with Otto a lot, and pushes hard for Harwin Strong to be made captain of the Gold Cloaks, and succeeds. This is coincides with Otto hearing rumors that Rhaenyra has been behaving inappropriately with men, especially Harwin and Criston Cole. He discusses these with Alicent, who refuses to believe that of both Criston and Rhaenyra, given that Criston is spending more time with her as her bodyguard as he struggles with his "sin". She does have that scene in the godswood with Rhaenyra, but instead of issues with Daemon, it's just saying that there are rumors spreading about her behavior and that Rhaenyra must have care with her reputation. Rhaenyra figures out it's Otto who's informing Alicent, and the mood here is complex; Alicent does want to look out for Rhaenyra but also wants to ascertain the truth, and Rhaenyra both sees and feels emotional about Alicent's care but also isn't sure if she can trust Alicent. Rhaenyra keeps that moment where she swears on the memory of her mother that nothing untoward happened, but this time it's an out and out lie, to showcase the way she handles issues that might harm her and her position, lie and deny (foreshadowing). There's also gonna be a scene, before the godswood, where Rhaenyra and Alicent talk about motherhood, and we see more of Rhaenyra's complex feelings on the topic, and she does admit she was worried Alicent would die in childbirth like Aemma.

Episode Six - It's Aegon's name day, and we can clearly see that Alicent is pregnant again, not as far along as she is in the show during episode three but at least starting to have a bump. And it's here that Daemon decides to make his return to court, and dramatically offer Viserys his crown and say that any title about the Narrow Sea means nothing to him, because Viserys is his true king. I'd add a lot more scenes of Viserys and Daemon in this episode, because remember, we haven't seen them interact since the first episode, and also to really highlight how there is a genuine affection here, especially on Daemon's part. Daemon and Rhaenyra also reconnect, and have a lot of conversations in the vein we see in the original episode 4, talking about how they can do whatever they want because they're Targaryens. It's heavily flirtatious, and we do get that scene of Daemon taking Rhaenyra into the city. Here, there is more an emphasis on Daemon really just wanting Rhaenyra to enjoy herself, since we'd have another scene between him and Laena at court, though more stilted because her intended, the son of the Sealord, is here too. But after that scene where the commons show more enthusiasm for baby Aegon than her, Rhaenyra and Daemon return, and Rhaenyra has a blunt moment about her struggles to be taken seriously. It gets pretty hot and heavy, and it's not in a private room, but one of the corridors. And lo and behold, who hears about it, but Otto. And this time, he takes his issues to the king, who does summon Rhaenyra to discuss it. Rhaenyra turns it around on Viserys, accusing him of abandoning her now that he has a son, and mentions that Otto has been spreading rumors not just about her and Daemon, but her and Harwin and her and Criston, and that she feels that Otto is no friend to the crown if he's going to impugn her own honor this way. Viserys discusses these allegations with Alicent as she's taking care of him, in earshot of Criston, who is horrified about being found out. But we get that moment from the show, where Alicent goes to bat for Rhaenyra, and points out that maybe Daemon was spreading some rumors himself. An emotionally exhausted Rhaenyra also gets a scene with Rhaenys, and they discuss the concept of being allowed to inherit, of inhabiting a man's position even though they are not men and cannot act like it, and the nature of Targaryens vs other Westerosi. Also there's a scene this ep in reference to a deleted scene from the original show where Rhaenyra is playing with toddler Aegon and getting him to say her name, a sweet moment between a brother and sister.

Episode Seven - Helaena has been born and is a few months old, and Rhaenyra and Otto are butting heads on the Small Council more and more, and as Daemon and Rhaenyra continue to spend time together, Otto continues to bring his concerns to the king. Eventually, Viserys fires Otto as the Hand, at Rhaenyra's insistence, and we do get that scene from the show between Otto and Alicent where he stresses that he doesn't think Rhaenyra could ever ascend, and that whole bit Rhys Ifans was talking about with how Otto wants to say "I love you and I'm scared for you" but doesn't know how. Alicent, feeling vexed that there are rumors about Daemon's behavior but nothing is happening, strongly urges Viserys to also send Daemon back to the Vale with Rhea Royce, saying that his habits endanger the Targaryens by engendering enmity in the smallfolk who feel that he's just allowed to act with impunity. Viserys also agrees to this, which Rhaenyra is not happy about, since it feels like Alicent removed an ally to her for no reason. Criston, meanwhile, we see continue to spiral about his tryst to Rhaenyra and the fallout of the lies involved, and goes to Alicent to ask if he can be in her service, and not have to spend time with Rhaenyra anymore. Alicent, who can see that he's upset about something, readily agrees, which drives a further wedge between her and Alicent. Rhaenyra turns to Laena Velaryon, who isn't particularly enthused about her betrothal to the son of the Sealord, and also to Harwin Strong just as a companion. After dinner with Laena and Rhaenys, Rhaenyra decides that she needs to take a husband to solidify her claim, especially with gossip at court that the king still summons the queen to his bedchamber in spite of having two children, which Rhaenyra does remain disgusted by. She goes to Viserys with the proposal that she tour the realm to find a suitable husband for the heir to the Iron Throne, and Viserys says nothing about her using that title, but agrees.

Episode Eight - Rhaenyra has been touring the Kingdoms, trying to find a husband, and it's not going well. She does go to the Vale, under the auspices of looking for a husband from that area, but mostly still to talk with Daemon. Laena also frequents the Vale, and the three of them tend to race their dragons, and Rhaenyra does notice that there's a simmering attraction between Laena and Daemon, which she calls Daemon out on, saying that, as Princess, she has no interest in playing second fiddle before she eventually departs the Vale. This leaves Daemon to confront what he does actually want out of a potential alliance with the Velaryons and the longstanding attraction with Laena (and maybe this leads him to killing Rhea? i'm conflicted on that one honestly but she does die in this episode, either accidentally like in the book or in a murkier version of what Daemon did in the show, maybe him just spooking her horse without bashing her head in with a rock). In King's Landing, Viserys grows increasingly infirm due to his various Iron Throne issues (yes I'm keeping that), and as such, Alicent has started accompanying him to Small Council meetings, which a lot of people are conflicted about. At first, we see her not doing much, but she eventually starts speaking out more and more. And at one point in the episode, Viserys is going to have an amputation, one that lays him up in bed for a bit, and Alicent still attends the Small Council in his place to speak for him. When someone points out that it is the Hand who speaks for the king, Alicent retorts that who knows the king better, and can thus speak for him best, than his own wife and, crucially (and the first time she ever flexes like this) the mother of his only son. At Driftmark, Rhaenys is back to ruling there, given that Corlys is back on the Small Council, and is definitely bitter about it. That's when Rhaenyra arrives, and offers a proposal: that she marry Laenor, and their first son be a Targaryen heir, while the others would stand to inherit Driftmark and other Velaryon properties as Velaryons. Rhaenys agrees to this, only writing a letter of the proposal to Corlys after she's done so to inform him that it's happening. Rhaenyra also gets more moments with Harwin in this episode, to build up to their relationship, and an important moment comes when she confides her issues with childbirth and childrearing after watching what it did to her mother.

Episode Nine - Rhaenyra arrives and is a bit weirded out to learn that Alicent is now on the Small Council too. The first meeting they have, where Rhaenyra discusses her marriage to Laenor, is a bit tense between them, and definitely awkward, but there's still an attempt at politeness. Rhaenyra has her talk with Laenor about different tastes, but she does also stress the importance that she does need an heir, so there will need to be duties performed on occasion to create one. Laena, meanwhile, is very not happy about Laenor's marriage and the bargain it includes, talking to her mother about how, if Rhaenyra can be the heir to the Iron Throne regardless of gender, then she, as Laenor's older sister, should be the one to inherit Driftmark and be the Lady of the Tides, and so should her own children. Rhaenys says that it's not going to happen, that Rhaenyra is only a solitary exception due to Targaryen nature, and Laena bluntly puts that it's a ridiculous thing to have it only be Rhaenyra, and that what would be the point of it at all if it didn't lead to larger change, otherwise the entire enterprise is doomed to failure (foreshadowing). Back in King's Landing, Criston Cole, whose arc this season has been about his religious convictions and how it feels to have betrayed those and seen the fallout, eventually cracks and confesses to Alicent, doing that whole "it's my sin but as a clement queen give me a quick death" moment. And Alicent is again betrayed at the fact that Rhaenyra lied, and the fallout from that lie for her and what that means about Rhaenyra. Rhaenyra, meanwhile, has a late night talk with Harwin about having to choose a husband when there wouldn't be an expectation of her to choose a wife if she were a man, and Harwin is genuinely sympathetic, leading to a spontaneous kiss. When the rehearsal dinner happens later, Rhaenyra is dressed in her house colors, dramatic Targaryen red and black, but Alicent arrives in a dazzling green dress, the colors of Oldtown at war. She gives a smile to Hightower relatives, yes, but the conversation about how she's grown into queenship is actually had with Tyland Lannister, who we'd have seen her interact with on occasion at the Small Council. Rhaenyra clocks Alicent's coolness towards her, and the two have a private moment when left alone on the dais while Viserys does, idk, something, and Alicent makes a cold callback to Rhaenyra swearing on Aemma's memory, letting her know that she knows of the lies and she's angry.

Episode Ten - It is the wedding day of Rhaenyra and Laenor, and everyone is here, the Velaryons and the son of the Sealord and all the Strongs and all the retinues of the Houses and even Otto is here as a guest, given that he is the father of the queen. Before a tourney to celebrate the impending nuptials, Rhaenyra and Harwin have a talk about their feelings, and Rhaenyra does stress that she wants him but it has to be discreet because of her position, but she does have an understanding with Laenor, and the two share another kiss. Meanwhile, Alicent, just to be petty, tells Viserys she feels that she's pregnant again, and that it's another boy, and Viserys, because he's a moron, actually announces this before the tourney. This is the tourney where, in the mélee, Criston Cole kills Laenor's lover Joffrey, to Laenor's shock and horror. Laenor and Rhaenyra are both immediately calling for consequences, but Alicent comes in for Criston, saying that it's an armed mélee and thus there's a natural acceptance of risk, which Joffrey knew, and Viserys lets the whole thing slide. This casts a pall over the wedding ceremony, and during the feast that night, Laenor is still dejected, which is why Rhaenyra goes to dance with others, like Harwin, and Daemon, who has been invited, and the two have another sexually charged moment. Daemon also dances with Laena, and bluntly asks her whether she wants to be married to the son of the Sealord, and she says no, and makes a comment about wanting Vhagar to eat him. The Sealord gets a bit uppity about someone else dancing with his bride to be, words are exchanged between him and Daemon, and it eventually breaks out into an actual fight. Alicent impulsively calls out for Rhaenyra, and Harwin does go to remove her, and Rhaenyra does have a moment where the first thing she does is check if Alicent herself is unharmed, showing that even with the worsening relationship that we've seen crack apart, there's still love there. Daemon eventually kills the son of the Sealord as Viserys, who again has been having those health problems all season like in the original show, passes out. This allows both Daemon and Criston Cole to sneak out unnoticed, and Criston, like in the show, is going to kill himself. Again, we've seen him kinda spiral all season, and after now killing someone too, not in combat but in a game, he feels at his lowest. And like in the show, Alicent stops him, though we do seem her kneel in the grass and take the knife from his hands. Alicent and Rhaenyra both then go to stay by Viserys, and we see them arrive at the same time before they sit on opposite sides of his bed. And here I will ape myself and my original answer again: "Episode ends with Daemon saddling Caraxes, ready to ride away before someone thinks "hey maybe we should imprison the guy who killed a foreign ally's leader", and then suddenly a great shadow blocks out the sun. Suddenly Vhagar lands in front of him, Laena atop her, and Daemon thinks, oh shit is she gonna try and fight me for killing her betrothed? He's still on the ground, and suddenly Laena climbs down from Vhagar to join him there. She doesn't say anything, but she smiles at him, and Daemon bends to kiss her hand." Meanwhile, at Viserys's sickbed, you have Rhaenyra, the Velaryons (minus Laena), and Harwin on one side, and Alicent, Larys, Otto, the Lannisters, Criston, and two attendants holding Aegon and Helaena on another. It's interspersed with a shot of Caraxes and Vhagar taking flight, almost dancing in the air, and their calls intermingle with baby Aegon beginning to cry. The dragons are dancing, the Targaryens are choosing side, and children are already weeping; th war may not have started yet, but it is already here. As Vhagar's wing eclipses the camera as she flies away, episode ends.

So this is uhhhhh not my best work as I'm making it up on the fly as I write this, but here ya go, HOTD season 1 if I were allowed to be showrunner. I'm not sure how coherent this all is, or if I got across all I wanted to. TL;DR here is that I would put a lot more focus on Alicent and Rhaenyra's relationship and its slow, gradual disintegration, as well as establishing the burgeoning sides that are going to be taken, along with adding more complexity to characters that were left by the wayside in the original show. But hope you liked it!