#it's like!! yeah he fights!!!! yeah he's excellent at it!!!

[shianis]

Starscream giving tiered Megatron a massage. But not romantic, calm and quiet one ,no, the harsh sport massage he personally likes, the one where you can hear hiss inner organs move, the one where you hear the human equivalent of bones cracking. He learned it back on Cybertron and it was good except it's painful during and 10 minutes after massage. It feels good after but It's painful for Megatron since he's old and Starscream likes listening to Megatron's "bones" cracking and his struggle not to cry. (It would be funny if it's prime since he has pointy elbows)

"Megatron vs. The Train"

There were few things in the universe more awe-inspiring than the mighty Lord Megatron in the heat of battle.

The Autobots had learned this lesson many times.

And today?

Oh, today was no different.

The fight had been fierce—blaster fire lighting up the sky, Energon staining the battlefield—but Megatron had grown bored.

So, naturally, he did what any warlord would do.

He picked up an entire train and hurled it at the Autobots.

Why? Because he could.

And it was glorious.

The Autobots scrambled. The train crashed down in a spectacular display of destruction. Smoke and debris filled the air, and Megatron allowed himself a satisfied smirk.

“Flawless.”

Then he took a step forward.

And immediately regretted it.

Pain shot through his back strut, straight up his spinal relays. His entire frame locked up.

The great and mighty Megatron, conqueror of Cybertron, flinched.

And that was when he knew.

He had made a grave mistake.

---

"Knockout’s Expert Medical Advice (a.k.a. ‘Suffer, My Liege’)"

Back on the Nemesis, Megatron sat on his throne, vents hissing as he tried to find a comfortable position.

He failed.

Knockout, the ever-enthusiastic Royal Medic Who Really Should Be Fired, stood beside him with a datapad, not looking as concerned as he should be.

“You threw a whole train, my lord.”

Megatron glared. “Your medical expertise astounds me, Knockout. Fix it.”

Knockout hummed, scanning him. “Mmm. Yeah. Looks like you strained something.”

Megatron’s optic twitched. “That much I know even without you!”

Knockout smirked. “Oh, I wasn’t sure. You’re usually more graceful with your train-throwing.”

Megatron growled. “Fix. It.”

Knockout sighed dramatically. “Alright, alright. Here.”

He casually handed Megatron a container of painkillers.

Megatron frowned. “…That’s it?”

Knockout shrugged. “Eh. You’ll live.”

And with that, Knockout left.

Megatron stared after him, betrayed.

---

"Starscream’s Hopes and Dreams (a.k.a. ‘Is He Finally Dying?’)"

For hours, Megatron suffered in silence.

Well.

Mostly silence.

Every few minutes, a low grunt or pained ex-vent would escape him.

And, naturally, Starscream noticed.

The seeker had been lurking around the throne room all day, listening to Megatron’s suffering with a growing sense of hope.

By the third pained grunt, Starscream was positively gleeful.

Finally. Finally. Was this it? Was one of his poisons finally working? Had he actually managed to do what no Autobot ever could?

His wings twitched in excitement.

But after several hours, it became clear that Megatron was not dying.

Just… suffering from back pain.

Starscream’s disappointment was immeasurable.

Still, the constant grunting was getting annoying.

So, with a long-suffering sigh, Starscream stepped forward. “Oh, for the love of—Do you have to suffer so loudly?”

Megatron shot him a deadly glare. “My patience is already thin, Starscream.”

Starscream smirked. “Yes, yes, I can see that. And hear it.”

Megatron growled. “Leave me.”

But Starscream had another idea.

“Oh no, my lord. I insist on helping.”

Megatron narrowed his optics. “You? Help?”

Starscream’s smirk grew. “You do know I have excellent servo control, don’t you? Precision movements, light touch…” His optics gleamed. “A massage, if you will.”

Megatron stared at him.

Everything in his very soul told him this was a trap.

But his back strut hurt.

And he was getting desperate.

“…Fine.”

Starscream beamed. “Oh, I will enjoy it so much.”

Megatron instantly regretted everything.

---

"Massage (a.k.a. This is most definitely not a trap’)"

Starscream’s claws pressed into Megatron’s back plates.

Megatron flinched.

Oh no.

Starscream worked with military precision, his servos moving in strategic patterns. His control was impressive. His technique was flawless.

But there was one, minor problem.

Starscream was all sharp angles.

It was like being massaged with knives.

Megatron bit down on his denta, resisting the urge to yell.

“This… is not pleasant.”

Starscream scoffed. “Oh, relax, lord Megatron. You’re so dramatic. It isn’t even an assassination attempt. This time.”

Megatron made a sound that was definitely not a pained yelp.

Starscream pressed harder.

Megatron seized up.

“This is agony,” he hissed.

Starscream grinned. “Good! That means it’s working.”

Megatron suffered. For twenty agonizing minutes, he endured Starscream’s precision torture.

By the end, he was this close to throwing Starscream off the ship.

When Starscream finally stepped back, he dusted off his claws, looking very pleased with himself.

“There. You’re welcome.”

Megatron took a very long, very deep ex-vent.

“…I will have my revenge for this.”

Starscream smirked. “Ohh sure you will.”

Megatron glared.

Then—POP.

His back strut suddenly shifted back into place.

The pain vanished.

Megatron froze.

“…Wait.”

Starscream tilted his helm. “Huh.”

Megatron shifted his shoulders. His optics widened.

“…It actually worked!”

[matchpointfaist]

me & you together song

best friend! connor murphy 𝜗𝜚

a/n: no smut! this is just soft connor falling in love <3

when you proposed the plan for connor to come with you on your weekend trip for a college tour, you hadn't entirely expected your parents to agree. some combination of safety in numbers and the general inseparability convinced them, though, and you were college bound with connor's black backpack snug next to your pink duffel, taking turns controlling the radio like you didn't have all the same taste.

he was in his own head, like always, thinking of all the million ways the two of you could grow apart when you left. he was never very strong academically, struggling with authority and retention and all the things you seemed to excel at. he knew, in some way, that it would always come to this; you moving on.

he tried his best to keep a smile, for you, unable to allow himself to ruin your mood. you'd been all smiles all day, wearing your "lucky sweater" and insisting that this was the one- you could feel it. the one in question happened to be nine hours from home, from him, and he selfishly could not seem to push the thought from his mind.

above everything, always, connor wanted you to be happy. so there he sat in the passenger seat of your car, watching the way the sun weaved through strands of your hair and your smile as you pointed out little landmarks. when you finally arrived at the campus, he could understand why you wanted to go so desperately- it was beautiful, lively, creative. everything your hometown was not.

you didn't have to tell him to take a million photos; one of you walking past the entrance sign, one of you grabbing a tour pamphlet, one of you with your tour guide. he had his phone out before you could even ask, capturing a million little memories that he could make a home in once you were gone.

you stayed in a hotel just off campus, courtesy of your parents, in a connecting room that you were both sure to take advantage of. you got pizza from a local place, and connor just listened intently as you raved about how excited you were to live like this every night, growing more and more uncertain in his ability to keep his thoughts to himself.

"it won't be like this, not really," he finally said, regretting it as soon as it left his mouth, "i mean, i won't be here, that's all. but you're gonna have so much fun," his encouraging smile felt more like a cringe.

"you could always come with me," you frowned slightly, and his chest ached, "i know you don't wanna go to college, but maybe you could get a job and then we could rent a place after my first year?" you'd discussed it before, of course, but it never went anywhere. he'd always shaken off the idea, not wanting to hold you down or hold you back from anything you wanted. you'd always insisted that it would be the opposite, but he couldn't shake the nagging thoughts.

"maybe," he said after a moment, "we'll see, yeah? we'll figure something out. maybe you can just come visit every month?" "i guess, yeah," you nodded hesitantly, "i don't wanna just see you once a month, con. i mean- you know i love you, and i believe in you. but sometimes you frustrate me so bad," you ran a hand through your hair, "i know your parents are overbearing, but they'd pay for you to go to school or for you to get an apartment if you'd just ask. you don't have to come with me, of course, but it seems like you want to and that's a perfect solution-"

he stopped you, standing to pace the room, his unease at the mention of his parents making him antsy. "please don't pretend to understand my relationship with my parents," he said quietly, his voice heavy with tension. "pretend?" you repeated with a scoff, "connor, i know you better than anyone! i'm the one who's always there after your fights, that's not fair,"

"just because you're there after doesn't mean you understand! your parents love you, they-" he paused, trying to calm down, "look, i'm sorry, okay? i shouldn't have come with you," you looked stricken at that, a pained, distant look in your eyes, "what?"

"i shouldn't have come, it was a mistake. this is a big thing for you and i'm messing it up," he said with a sigh, rubbing a hand over his face. "you're not messing it up, connor. i just don't understand-" "that's right, you don't understand," he cut you off, "look- let's just go to bed, okay? i'll see you in the morning," he grabbed his phone from the bed and disappearing behind the connecting room door, leaving you speechless.

you ran over the argument what felt like a hundred times, trying to figure out what went wrong. he could be so frustrating, so single minded when it came to his potential, but he'd never lashed out at you. you'd always been the one calming him down, not working him up. you hated this, whatever this even was.

on the other side of the door, connor wasn't doing any better. he felt sick with guilt, hating the way you'd looked at him as he snapped at you, hating the way he'd said you didn't understand. you understood better than anyone else, and he knew that, deep down. you saw him in a way he could never allow anyone else to.

he glanced up as he heard a quiet knock at the door, recognizing the little pattern tapped against it, feeling silly as his heart rate spiked at the idea of you on the other side, coming to him despite his temper. "come in," he called, smoothing out the blanket to busy his hands. you stepped inside quietly, the hoodie of his that you always slept in catching his eye immediately.

"i hate when we fight," you said softly, still standing like you weren't sure how close to get to him, "i can't sleep knowing you're upset," you looked so vulnerable in that moment, he would've done anything to make it better. ask his parents for college tuition, move hours away with you, whatever it took to get the teary eyed expression off of your face. "i hate it too," he sighed, opening his arms and gesturing you over, "not mad at you, just- it's hard,"

you crossed the room, settling on the bed and melting into his arms in the way he'd grown so addicted to. "didn't mean to pressure you," you mumbled into his shirt, "i'm really sorry, con," god, you had it all wrong. "you aren't pressuring me," he said quietly, running his hand through your hair absentmindedly, "i don't even know how to say all of this," you pulled back slightly, just enough to look up at him, your brows knit. "say all what?"

"i want you to do whatever you want, go wherever you want, and i hope you know that. you're gonna do so many great things, and i'm scared i'll hold you back from that, or that you'll have so many things that you won't need me anymore. and i know that's unfair, and you've always shown that i'm important, but it terrifies me, the idea of not having you in my life," he hated the way his voice cracked, "and you're my best friend, and i've sat with this and i haven't said anything because i'd never do anything to jeopardize that,"

i'm really doing this, he thought, as he continued on, "the idea of not being in your life terrifies me because i'm- well, fuck, i'm in love with you. you're so funny and so fucking smart, and you always know what to say, but you never really have to say anything. just being with you is the easiest part of my life. and i'd love to follow you to college, i'd love to get us a place just for the two of us, i would love nothing more than to make a little life with you, and i know we're so young and we're friends and if this is all wrong, we can forget it, okay? but i couldn't act like i wasn't feeling this way, it wasn't fair to either-"

"connor," he opened his eyes, not realizing he'd ever even closed them, to find you beaming and giddy and close to laughing, "i've been waiting so long for you to say that to me, do you have any idea? god, we're both so stubborn," and then you were on him, your arms around his shoulders and your face buried in his neck, hugging him the tightest anyone ever had.

he laughed, breathless and shocked, holding you closer to him, "are you serious?" "of course i'm serious," he could feel your smile against his skin, "i've been in love with you for ages," he pulled you back slightly, your cheeks pink and your smile giddy as you looked up at him, and he couldn't resist it anymore, he kissed you with all the emotion he'd been holding back for what felt like a lifetime, smiling against your lips, laughing as you pulled away to rest your forehead on his.

the two of you just laid there for a while, your legs tangled together and your hands trailing over each others arms, backs, hair, anywhere the other could reach. he hadn't even realized he'd dozed off until you were yawning softly and shifting to lay your head on the pillow. "i love you," you mumbled, a sleepy smile on your lips. "i love you,"

you fell asleep hand in hand, your own bed on the other side of the door long forgotten.

[andhumanslovedstories]

I'll play the 500-word ask game! Your Tortall fanfic, please - I was thinking of this segment, but really anything you want to comment on in the fic! (Also thank you for writing it; the voice works very well and the text feels very true-to-source!)

Kel may never have forgiven the king for putting her through a probation period—a life’s first major disappointment cuts deep and leaves a scar—but her issues to him as a man did not blind her to his success as a king. “He’s formed alliances with the Bazhir, the Yamani, and Tusaine for the first time in our history. He controls the Dominion Jewel, the most powerful mage in the world is loyal to him, and our training school produces the finest knights in the world.”

Don’t forget our excellent spy operations,” Alanna added. “But people’s memories get short, especially in times of hardship. A short war unites a nation; a long one wearies it. And our war with Scanra has lasted far longer than we expected, even after your contribution.”

Kel grimaced. It was true. Even after Kel had slain the creator of the Scanran war machines, the forces of King Maggur fought bitterly for every inch of land. They had no reasonable hope of winning, not with Scanra’s weak harvest and weaker tribal alliances, but they were determined to make Tortall’s victory costly. They’d turned to guerilla tactics in the mountainous border region between the two nations, and they were willing to lay down their lives for every square inch.

Still, the gaudiness of the Midwinter’s Festival felt tasteless to Kel, a slap in the face to the soldiers who died and the ones who were still there fighting in the bleakest of conditions. “If everyone could put some trust in each other and go without the things they don’t need, we could redirect all this wealth to ending the war.”

“If people could trust each other and go without, we wouldn’t be fighting this war. We’d be living in some happy utopia that would be very boring for people like you and me.”

Oh my god, I wrote this Tortall fic in 2011. Sometimes the passage of time just hits. Especially because of the time I remember Kel has always been my favorite of Pierce's leads. It would be difficult to overstate the impact Kel as a character has had on me over the years. I wrote this fic in October 2011--that was during my first semester of college, when I was 18 years old. I'd brought The Protector of the Small books with me to college for emotional support. There was a hurricane on the east coast during our freshman orientation that knocked out the power in my dorm. I remember reading all four books by a window while it was raining like crazy, and then thinking ruefully that I should have saved them for later when I needed a pick me up.

That makes it an extra pleasant surprise when I reread it and really liked it! (I even had the very odd feeling of being inspired by my own ending.) I remembered the broad strokes of it--Kel and Alanna talking at a banquet while on the lookout for Tortall's second openly female page--and absolutely none of the details. I can't believe the only relationship tag I had in there was Kel/Dom. I'll be honest, I don't even really remember who Dom is. I went back and added Kel & Alanna as the main relationship because, like, duh. Yeah.

It's doubly weird to me I tagged the barely mentioned romantic pairing considering the story was written for a livejournal community challenge to specific write gen fic about women outside of the context of romance and shipping. This was a weird transition time in fandom where lj communities were still very prominent, but more and more fic was getting posted on AO3 instead of in a community or on a personal journal. I remember some debate about what female characters counted for femgenficathon (the community/challenge I wrote this for). It might have been a debate about trans women, but I remember more specifically discussions of whether genderswapped male characters counted.

Anyway, back to this fic specifically, it's funny the author's note is me talking about the difficulties of writing fanfic for a book because I want to match the author's style when that's something that I've been thinking about a lot lately writing for Scum Villain. What I remember most about this fic is specifically the work I put in studying Tamora Pierce's writing style so I could ape it. A sentence early--"Her closest tablemate, a small but sturdy red-headed woman Kel regarded with equal parts affection and awe, chuckled at Kel’s distress."--is the direct result of me studying Pierce's first paragraphs in her work to see how she reintroduces the reader to characters they have met before. There's also a simplicity and directness to the language that isn't my default. I can get pretty flowery. In my default state, I love a paragraph long metaphor.

These two women have this shared experience but also could not be more different. When I was a kid, I really wanted Alanna and Kel to be best friends, and I was disappointed when they weren't, but I understood why. They are very different people, almost in different genres. Alanna and Kel are two very different takes on the lady knight. Having to pretend to be a boy versus openly being a girl leads to such different dynamics. Alanna's story is so much about identity and self-definition, but also about being extraordinary. She's gifted with magic, she's touched by the goddess, she has a magic cat. She's a fantasy heroine. She's indisputably extraordinary.

Kel meanwhile has no magic. Her story emphasizes continual, endless practice, discipline, training. Her adventures are human-sized. Alanna's book one ends with defeating magical monsters in a cursed city. Kel's involves helping a bunch of other pages fight off bandits. She doesn't deal with gods; she gets put in charge of a refuge camp. Her story involves a lot of practical logistics in a way Alanna's doesn't. So she ends up being this character that's such a mix of realism and idealism, seeing the world the way it could and should be while also seeing the work and frustration of getting there. That was what made her such a huge inspiration to me as a kid--god, between her and Tiffany Aching, I have gotten so much from the tales of hard working girls.

That's why Kel in this fic looks to everyday and mundane examples of female fighters. Because she works so close to the ground, she appreciates the grassroots. I thought that hit a good balance of her faith in the future without making it sound like she thought gender equality would be easy. Actually, to be honest, I got...comforted, I guess, by my own ending. (Again, a very pleasant surprise.) Kel's hope always feels earned. That's what I was aiming for.

[wildsaltair]

I could write an entire thesis on how Maximus is so husband-coded and how different he is from other action heroes of, before, and after his day. he is so timeless because his qualities go so far beyond the generic, and I want to stand on a mountaintop to explain this in painstaking detail to the whole world

[scatterbrainedbot]

Hello :D

You're so cool

Anyway have you thought that in your rat sons au Splinter might outlive the boys?

You're very cool :D love your stuff dude

(tw for some blood, light gore, implied overdose (kinda??))

hi copper!!! this is a fantastic question!

so obviously typical irl rats have far shorter lifespans than the average irl tortoise. according to google (yes, be awed by my spectacularly in-depth wealth of research) the average pet rat lives between 2-4 years ish, and the oldest on record lived to be about 7. meanwhile, an African spurred tortoise (Splinter's species) averages more around a 50ish year lifespan in captivity, tho is suspected to possibly exceed 75 or more in the wild.

Now, the mutation does give us a lot of wiggle room for playing with these numbers. For the rat sons boys, id say their natural lifespan probably clocks in at about 45-55 years old? definitely not old by human standards, but not young young either. (though, its also important to note that the boys were exposed to the mutagen just days after being born.)

For Splinter, meanwhile, aging is slightly more complicated. He lived the vast majority of his life as a regular normal African spurred tortoise (well, non-mutated at least. there were perhaps some shenanigans of a more mystical variety going on before he was mutated, but thats a separate matter) He was about 70ish i think? when the boys were born and they were all exposed to the mutagen. so he is already distinctly an old man turtle papa. id guess he'd probably still have another eh lets say 25-30 years after his mutation. he could probably push it a little farther even with some mystic nonsense, but when push comes to shove id say his 'natural' post-mutation lifespan would put his death like a solid decade or two before his sons.

of course, the tricky part of the matter is that theres no way for Splinter to know any of this. theres no way for him to know how the mutation affected them all, or if it even affected them all in the same way. especially since the boys dont show many physical signs of mutation for the first few years, and just kinda look like normal rats, (albeit with a more human sort of intelligence) — what sort of health standard do you hold them to? what if they simply dont show external signs of sickness or old age anymore? how do you actually know if something is wrong?

for a while there Splinter is very worried that one of his babies will just essentially reach the end of their normal rat lifespan, fall and not get up again.

so mostly, he just tries to live in the moment, enjoying whatever time he does have with his little ones, taking each day as a gift <3

still,

that fear

never

really

goes

away.....

[amaranthdahlia]

god i will never stop fawning over how absolutely SPECTACULAR afo vs bakugou was. genuinely one of the best fights in the entire manga in terms of art, the themes, the pararells, the gayness, the fight itself, and just. everything about it makes me wanna scream into my pillow and chew on it

[wahbegan]

It's a bit creepy the way they keep making Batman villains anti-authoritarian cult leaders whipping the disenfranchised up into violent mobs these days innit

[todayisafridaynight]

any hopes for kiwami 3? like things u wanna see added or changed stuff like that

if they dont keep kiryu's goofy walk stance and the hoof-like walk sounds i dont wanna play it

[gwydionae]

I get using no specific iteration of the TMNT in a crossover and just making yet another new version. After all, the franchise has had many, many different versions at this point, so it's easy to accept that this is simply one more to add to the pile.

But Naruto has... one. Just the one. So when all of a sudden characters are written/shown to have expertise that they shouldn't have at the age they're being depicted, it just ends up feeling weird.

I get that fitting things into the Naruto timeline can be a chore. Do it too early, and Sakura is kinda useless. Do it too late, and Sasuke's off murdering people. And if you try to set it after the series, the power levels are seriously gonna be out of whack.

But breaking the only canon that has ever existed for these characters makes them feel like... not the same characters. I might be the only one who cares about this, but it really took me out of the story, to the point where I couldn't help but focus on it. I don't want to be distracted from page one of a silly ninja crossover comic.

[whistlingstarlight]

Okay No Way Home is old news now ik, and I do still find it a very fun film but uhhh few things that could've vastly improved it (for me specifically):

1) Topher Grace Venom but the scrapped skeleton concept (or as I like to call him, SkelEddie). Explain it away with the same reason Sandman doesn't make himself look human read: don't explain and hope the audience are too excited to notice

2) Alternatively, either of the Harry Osborns. Would be interesting to see Norman interacting with either his Harry or a Harry from a different universe

3) Either way, one extra character means Sinister Six and that's always fun :]

4) Using the Doc Ock Walk rig the Spider-Man 2 crew made to make the (admittedly few) times Otto walks using the actuators in this film have some weight and believable movement to it

5) Hot take but make Electro blue again. Or at the very least have the power of the arc reactor revert him back into energy again (have him still be yellow though, different universe so different energy and all that)

6) Literally do anything with the Lizard. I honestly forgot he was there occasionally-

[marielschism]

what are vincent's weapons of choice!!!!!

[talentforlying]

ROMANTIC GESTURES

bold for always applies, italics for potential / it depends.

holding hands (in public) · buying flowers · cooking · cuddles · writing a poem / song · holding door open · tying shoe laces · sharing a milkshake with two straws · offering their jacket when it's cold · kissing in the rain · publicly confessing love · long walks at the beach · doing the titanic pose on a boat · taking cute pictures in a photobooth · sharing a taxi / uber · kissing the back of their hand · slow dancing · getting tickets of their favourite artist / sports team / other · introducing them to their parents · lighting candles · flower petals on bed · love letters · star gazing · brushing / doing their hair · picnics · teaching them to play an instrument / sport while gently guiding their hands · compliments · late night drives · taking selfies together · drawing them · self-made gifts · massages · proposing with a family heirloom ring · lending them their favourite book to read · paying for dinner / coffee · mixtapes / playlists · surprise birthday parties · feeding them · handing them keys to their apartment · making space in drawer for their clothes when they stay over · sharing a blanket · couple costumes (VERY rare) · tucking a hair strand behind their ear · running after them at the airport / keeping them from leaving · moving cities to be together · blowing a kiss · breakfast in bed · defending them in a fight (verbally / physically) · joint bubble baths · dropping the L-bomb ("i love you") · dedicating a song at the karaoke bar to them · wearing their clothes · yawning before putting an arm around them while watching a movie · grant them the last bite (from meal)

tagged by: @shilohgreen tagging: you!

[evilminji]

"DO BETTER!" Says Now Televised Fanboy

He, Dash Baxter is a Phan-Stan!! It's kinda his thing. See, he's a fancy ass talk show host now. Married Paulie, moved out of Amity, actually DID something with his life. His parents? Did not approve. Long n short of it? He got kicked out.

Paulie's parents were PISSED.

Retaliated by giving him all the help he needed getting EVERY scholarship he qualified for. He went to a really nice college. Missed his girlfriend like mad. But she was off in Metropolis, terrifying weaker men. Conquering the fashion scene.

And SOMEHOW? Thanks to that long talk he had with Phantom (*incoherent fanboy gibbering noises* SO COOL!) he's worked to be... more of a LEADER, you know? Less of an asshole. Cause he's popular. People copy him. He can't be an asshole.

So, somehow, when he's punching out some try-hard that thinks he's hot shit for bullying a Nerd? He and the nerd get talking, right? Cause the guy got his glasses completely fucked up. And it's what Phantom would do.

But GET THIS? Guy's never HEARD of Phantom! Is super curious, cause he runs a small time Hero's show on the web. And, Dude? Is it your LUCKY DAY! Cause you just met THE number 1 fan of Phantom, hands down!! He makes his VERY spirited case, about why Phantom is THE best Hero to ever have lived. And this guy?

Entranced.

In AWE.

Just straight up BEGS him to join his show. Cause apparently? He was BORN for it. Which? Yeah. He HAS been giving speechs to the team for YEARS now. And Talking at fan meet ups. Leading fan meet ups. Hosting parties... actually, now that he thinks about it? He DOES do a lot of public speaking? Huh.

But still, he's about to say "no", when?

Dude mentions? He'll get to talk about Phantom.

SOLD!

It. Blows. Up. Absolutely EVERYONE is in love with his pretty face, hot bod, and STRONG opinions. But they ALSO have no idea who Phantom is! Paulie! This is CRIMINAL! Horrifying! What is going ON!?

Some bullshit information black out, apparently. At least according to her... friendly Nemesis? The Goth Dweeb. Who's engaged, apparently? So good for her. Unsurprisingly, it's too the OTHER Dweebs, but still. Bout time she started planning to drag them to a court house. She's the only one with any spine in that group! If she waited for THEM to propose?

Not even as Ghosts, man.

They'd get distracted by shiny nerd shit and whimp out.

Still... a world where NO ONE knows how Awesome, Phantom is? Not on HIS watch!

So he works it in. To every segment. It becomes "his thing". Oh? Super man saved a kitten from a tree? Cute. Well PHANTOM saved a bus full of Ghost Puppies from a shady, rouge, Goverment agency. Do BETTER, Superman!

The Flash, who is a cheap knock-off and stole his name, took down an Ice Villian? Adorable! PHANTOM stopped a Rouge WINTER SPIRIT with the help of YETI WARRIORS then assisted in giving FREE medical care for anyone who needed it! Here's a picture of him making GHOST ICE SNOWMEN for small children! Do BETTER, Knock-off!

What's THAT you say? Wonder Woman fought a GOD in down town paris?

Excellent work Wonder Woman. Flawless as always. But YOU, god-boy, are a disappointment! All that power! And WHAT do you use it for? Are you even supposed to BE here?? PHANTOM uses his power to HELP people! Is awesome and knows TONS of better gods! You're just salty you didn't make the cut!

DO BETTER!

And obviously? No one believes him. There's no record of this "Phantom" guy. The pictures look fantastical and vaguely glitchy/glowy. Not quite right. They GOTTA be photo shopped. Manipulated somehow. But? As a shtick? A fake "perfect Superhero" is kinda funny and unique.

And it's one hell of Fake Hero!

A Dead Champion? Who fights gods and monsters? Rouge agencies? Sassy and tragic? With a mysterious past? Pretty cool! There's even an Offical Comic from some guy that went to the same high-school as Baxter!

Of course, as Baxter get more and more popular? The "meme" hero, Phantom, get more well known? People get more interested in where Dash grew up. You know, just a bored Google. Maybe see if the hero was based off a local legend or something. But... huh...

The Town website?

Weirdly? Sanitized.

Like... like aggressively sanitized. All smooth edges and no details. Very "move along, citizen". Ha ha... it's part of the joke right? They get it! They'll just look up local restaurants or som-....

Wait...

Hey, guuuuys?

Are you finding ANYTHING?

And! Nothing. And I do mean NOTHING! Triggers the "oh? Secrets???" Instincts of a Hacker, like finding a hard blank wall of "KEEP OUT". Especially when it's somewhere it rightfully shouldn't BE.

All it would take? Is ONE person, of decent skills and an account on Certain Forums, getting bored enough to Google the Dude On The TV(TM)? For the GIW's lil walls to come crashing down. Because yeah, you can stop ONE hacker. Even two. Probably five or six.

But how about thousands?

Hundreds of thousands?

From every time zone. Competing. Just to see what you HAVE and don't want them to see. Maybe they do something with it, maybe they don't. But fuck it, you're being RUDE and now they're CURIOUS. And THEN? Oh. Oh holy shit.

Not a meme.

Very real.

Not a joke.

The walls come crumbling down, down, down. Ripped apart by hundreds of hands. Emails sent to every sort of agency. The JLU line inundated with emergency tips. Not a joke. Not A Joke. Holy Shit, IT WASN'T A JOKE!

Phantom is REAL!

And there, on TV, stands the Man. The signal FINALLY breaching containment. Fighting off the invading God of the week. Built like statue, hair like an aurora borealis of white fire held almost delicately in place by a CROWN of ice, a suit made of void and starlight. Inhuman. Beyond human.

Here to help.

A laugh that crackles like ice and the snap of winter, rolls through the air like coming storms, rich and somehow warm. A smile that bares teeth, yet turns so KIND when he looks upon humanity, as though we are precious and worth fighting for. A living star.

A... a once living star.

And in the center of it all? Wearing his BESPOKE, custome made, Number 1 Phan full body outfit? That's right. Dash Baxter. Ha! You fuckers doubted him! Behold his blorbo and WEEP, ya fuckin casuals! The BESTEST of boys! The FINEST of Heros! Superman? Could NEVER.

And now? The weather!

@babbling-babull @nerdpoe @the-witchhunter @ailithnight @hypewinter @hdgnj @mutable-manifestation

[flametrashiraarchive]

Can I request n/sfw headcanons for muzan x non violent demon reader?

(⁠っ⁠˘⁠з⁠(⁠˘⁠⌣⁠˘⁠ ⁠)

YES YES YES

Okay so you know this got my cogs turning and it ended up being more of a short story instead of headcanons lol. And yeah, I went with the idea of the reader being a demon who can draw strength from Muzan in... other ways 😏

Also this was an excellent excuse for me to write a "Muzan losing his composure and coming completely undone" fic so thank you thank you thank you 🛐

I hope you like it!

NSFW under the cut!

Succor - Muzan x Reader

(Non-violent demon reader, GN!Reader)

You were a curiosity. Another demon who did not consume human flesh– only the third such demon Muzan had heard of in a thousand years, and the only one of those three who wasn't actively revolting against him.

However, the thought did occur to him to simply dispose of you. You were defective after all, still clinging to your humanity. And you were weak too; slowly starving. 

Muzan had no use for you… and yet… and yet…

Perhaps it was simple morbid curiosity, or perhaps it was the wasted potential he saw in you. Before he transformed you into a demon you were beautiful, but once imbued with his strength and blood, you were divine… magnificent. And you were frittering that gift away.

"Explain yourself to me," he said as you knelt before him, barely clinging to your senses while he sat, poised and elegant as ever. "Why are you suffering like this for the sake of mortals? Why do you refuse to consume humans?"

"It's repulsive," you answered. He could hear the weakness in your voice even as you stared defiantly back at him.

The only blood you had ever consumed was Muzan's at the moment of your creation, and your body seemed to recognize that. The hunger in your eyes was palpable. It thrummed in the air between you. Your survival depended on getting more of it. You craved it.

Your stubbornness was obvious too, and if the past thousand years had taught him anything it was that minds like yours could not be changed with violence and threats. No, he had to win you over gently. He would have to love you into becoming the monster he needed. He would adore you into submission.

He leaned forward in his seat and placed two fingers beneath your chin, tilting your face toward him. "You would be a very special demon if you would only feed."

Oh, your hunger was dizzying. You were fighting so hard to retain your composure. He slowly dragged his thumb across your lower lip, relishing the way your eyes closed in response to his touch.

You were lovely, despite your defects. 

"Eat," he said, his lips so close to yours he could feel the warmth of your breath on his skin. "Please. I do not wish to see you fade away."

He placed a tender kiss on your lips, and another and another. You were so fragile, so drained.

Then something in you switched.

His eyes widened as you suddenly gripped the back of his head, pulling him to you with a ferocity he did not think you were capable of. 

Overpowering you still would have been easy; as simple as swatting away a gnat. But this sudden burst of strength was intriguing. You kissed him deeper and deeper, your tongue easing past his lips as a soft, satisfied moan emerged from you.

Something twinged, low in Muzan's belly. It had been centuries since he felt anything akin to desire, but you were seemingly intent on unraveling him. With every passing second your passion blazed hotter… and your strength was growing. 

Your fingers clung to him with an iron grip, as if your very survival hinged on his kiss. His crimson eyes widened once more as the realization hit him– you were in fact drawing strength from kissing him. It seemed his saliva had the same effect on your demonic body as his blood. 

He kissed you deeper still, intrigued and excited by your newfound vigor. After a thousand years of living, Muzan had assumed he had seen everything, but there you were, proving him wrong. You were so greedy for it too, your kisses so passionate and hungry they made the world tilt a little. 

He pulled back to examine you. "My dear, I–"

His breath caught in his throat as your hands went straight to the fastening of his trousers. Your eyes were near black with primal hunger as you pulled out his semi-hard cock. You wrapped your lips around it without hesitation and began to suck his tip. 

"Ohh~" Muzan choked out, gripping the sides of the seat as your tongue swirled around the head of his dick and teased his slit. 

It didn't take long for him to go from semi-hard to achingly erect. The power you wielded over his body, his helpless involuntary reaction; it was humiliating. And yet he did nothing to stop you. His breaths shivered out of him as he fought with everything he had not to buck his hips up into your mouth so you would take him all.

"How… dare… y– nghh…" his back arched as you palmed his balls, and wrapped your other hand around the base of his cock, milking him with that same hunger you had while kissing him. 

Oh gods, that was it, wasn't it? You wanted his seed, you needed it to sustain your continued perverse existence. You would not consume human flesh but you would draw power from him instead.

"You filthy little thing," he whispered through gritted teeth as you lapped up each bead of precum dripping from his cock. 

Your eyes were no longer lifeless; they glittered with vitality. 

Muzan's thighs trembled as your lips slid up and down his shaft , taking him to the very back of your throat, licking and sucking like the greedy degenerate you were. 

The wooden arm rests of the seat creaked and splintered beneath Muzan's fingers as he squeezed them, gasping as the pressure in his core became unbearable and he drew closer and closer to release.

"You want it, don't you… hm? Ohh, yes, you want my cum. I'm going… I'm going to give it… to… y–" He gasped for air, shattering the arm rest entirely. "Ohhh… ffffuck…"

He came undone, deep, guttural cries emerging from him as you swallowed his spend with fervor until he was sure he had nothing left. 

And then you kept on sucking. 

"M-more…" you growled as you continued to lap at his overstimulated cock, pressing your hand to his belly and holding him down.

His hand darted up to the wall above his head with such force the wood shattered beneath his palm as he released a choked cry. Gods, what were you other than his undoing? The pathetic, broken sounds of his whimpers enraged him but he would not stop you.

Heat prickled across his entire body. His face was flushed and gleaming with a fine mist of sweat which only added to his humiliation.  All that strength and power, yet he was helpless as you sucked his cock. 

"Damn you, damn you…hhhgh…"

His second orgasm tore through him like a beast with its claws drawn. Your greedy mouth claimed him entirely, swallowing down every drop of his essence as he came again. 

"Ohh Gods… oh Gods you filthy wretch…" his body shuddered as his pleasure waned and you finally ceased your sucking. 

Still, you gazed at him and audaciously lapped his tip, ensuring you'd got every last drop. And when you were finally satisfied you sat back, as a contented smile spread across your lips. 

Muzan took your face between his hands and inspected you. Your eyes were burning with vitality. Your skin was flushed and warm. You were rejuvenated completely, as if you had consumed a hundred mortal souls.

Your beauty and power were unlike anything he had ever seen. Such a curiosity.

Further study was most definitely required. 

"Fascinating," he whispered as his pulse slowly returned to normal. "Yes, I think I'll keep you here with me."

[gyuuberryy]

𝐕𝐄𝐍𝐎𝐌 !

pairing: venom!jay x reader

genre: venom au, one sided rivalry, loser!jay, office coworkers, superhero

synopsis: when a geeky coworker’s transformation catches your eye, curiosity leads to a discovery far darker—and more thrilling—than you ever imagined. now, blackmail has you entangled with jay and his possessive alter ego, venom, in a dangerous game neither of you wants to end.

warnings: kissing, fighting, venom??

note: where are my marvel girlies at whoo hoo! venom is so pookie and my biggest "hear me out" hehe he got me sobbing in the theatre. jay as venom would be SO hot kjvfbvnjb >< so i wrote this to make up for me going mia for a while, i have too much school work so writing will be slow. anyway enjoyyy reading!!

word count: 2.5k

your office life was a balancing act between emails, deadlines, and… keeping your one-sided rivalry with park jongseong alive. jay(as everyone else called him), with his slightly too-short ties and endearing but tragic fashion sense, was the clueless office geek. he was awkward, quiet, and too nice for his own good. yet, no matter how awkward he was, jay always managed to excel in everything he did, effortlessly snagging the praise you thought should have been yours.

what irritated you most was that jay never seemed to notice your rivalry. he was too busy offering you help or giving you his signature polite, bumbling smile. and sometimes, you’d even catch yourself watching him a little too closely, feeling a reluctant warmth for his harmless, good-guy charm.

one afternoon, you wandered over to his desk, smirking as you noticed his usual setup: notebooks organised to the millimetre, a stack of neatly sharpened pencils, and a sticky note that read “be confident!” in his looping handwriting.

he looked up as you approached, adjusting his slightly crooked glasses and giving you a shy smile.

“hey, park,” you began, leaning casually against his desk. “did you remember to double-check the new client report? i know how thorough you like to be.”

jay blinked, his cheeks turning pink. “y-yeah, i went over it twice… just to make sure everything was right.”

“of course you did,” you replied with a playful eye roll. “wouldn’t want our employee of the month slipping up, now would we?”

he smiled, looking down at his notebook. “just doing my best.”

you shook your head, laughing softly. for some reason, you loved seeing him blush, getting him all flustered with a few well-placed jabs. jay was sweet, awkward, and, despite your constant teasing, he never seemed to hold it against you.

but the next week, everything changed.

jay showed up to work that monday looking like a different person. gone were the slightly wrinkled shirts and too-short ties. instead, he wore a fitted, charcoal button-down with the top few buttons undone, revealing a silver chain against his collarbone. his sleeves were rolled up, showing his forearms in a way that made you do a double-take. and he’d traded his old glasses for sleek, dark-rimmed ones that suited him way too well, giving him a smouldering look.

you did a double take as he walked by, giving you a casual, confident nod. “morning,” he said, his voice low and smooth. the bumbling, endearing jay you knew was nowhere to be found.

you shook it off, convincing yourself it was just a fluke. but over the next few days, you couldn’t ignore the transformation.

he traded in his ill-fitting clothes for tailored shirts, stylish watches, and a few artfully unbuttoned collars that showed off his neck and a hint of muscle. it seemed like his glasses had now permanently changed, now sleek and sophisticated, accentuating his jawline in a way that made you, against your better judgement, find yourself staring a little too long.

and it wasn’t just his style—jay’s entire demeanour was different. instead of blushing and stuttering, he’d catch you looking, smirking with a confidence that left you flustered.

one afternoon, you approached him, determined to regain some control of the dynamic. “wow, park,” you said, crossing your arms. “fancy new look. trying to impress someone?”

he looked up, a slow smile spreading across his face. “why? is it working?”

your cheeks heated, but you forced a laugh. “don’t flatter yourself.”

“oh, i don’t need to,” he replied smoothly, leaning back in his chair. “you do a pretty good job of that.”

his words left you speechless, your usual comebacks fizzling as he held your gaze with a smirk. flustered, you turned away, cursing under your breath.

when had park jongseong become… hot?

over the next week, his flirtations continued, growing bolder and more direct. every time you tried to tease him, he’d have a response that left you stumbling. gone was the stammering, geeky coworker you used to playfully bully; in his place was someone who knew exactly how to get under your skin, his newfound confidence throwing you off balance.

but one night after work, things took an unexpected turn.

you’d noticed him acting strange, glancing at his arms as though trying to keep something in check. he slipped out of the office quickly that evening, his face tense, and curiosity got the best of you. you followed him, keeping your distance as he made his way down the street, eventually ducking into a dark alleyway.

hiding behind the corner, you peeked around, pulling out your phone and hitting “record” just in case. what you saw left you speechless.

jay was standing in the middle of the alley, his body tense, his hands clutching his head. dark, inky shadows pulsed along his arms, twisting and curling like tendrils wrapping around him. his posture shifted, his shoulders straightening as the shadows coiled around his body, transforming him into something that was equal parts terrifying and mesmerising.

suddenly, jay let out a deep, guttural growl, his face contorting as sharp, gleaming fangs appeared, his once-soft eyes turning pitch black.

“finally,” a rough, raspy voice rumbled, oozing from jay’s mouth with a sinister excitement. “let’s go for a little… snack.”

a cold chill shot through you as you held up your phone, capturing the whole transformation on video. your heart was racing, but you couldn’t look away. whatever was happening to jay was unlike anything you’d ever seen.

as he turned, his gaze fell on the man who’d appeared in the alley, a figure holding a crowbar, his face twisted in anger. jay’s lips twisted into a wicked grin as he stalked toward the man, his voice dropping into a dark, predatory tone.

“ohhh, you picked the wrong guy to mess with tonight,” the voice sneered, dripping with a twisted glee. “i am going to enjoy this.”

the man froze, his face paling as jay’s shadows coiled around him, binding him in place. jay’s grin widened, his fangs gleaming as he leaned in close.

“run along, before i decide you’d make a nice little snack,” he growled, his voice a terrifying blend of jay’s and something far darker.

the man didn’t hesitate, stumbling away into the shadows. but as jay straightened, his gaze flickered over to you, and his eyes narrowed. in a heartbeat, he was in front of you, his inky black tendrils stretching out to trap you, pinning you against the wall.

you swallowed, trying to keep your breathing steady as he loomed over you, his dark, twisted grin sending a thrill of both fear and fascination through you.

“you… got that on video?” he murmured, his voice back to normal but tinged with a rough edge.

you held up your phone, smirking. “every second of it.”

his eyes flashed with a dangerous glint, and he leaned closer, his face inches from yours. “we could just… eat you, you know. save ourselves a lot of trouble.”

you raised an eyebrow, refusing to back down. “please. you didn’t even eat that guy. there’s no way you’d hurt me.”

he chuckled, the sound low and dark, his gaze flicking over your face. “hmm, true… i like you too much for that.”

the words left you breathless, your heart skipping a beat as you stared up at him, stunned. his face softened, a small, genuine smile replacing the sinister grin.

“so… about that video,” he murmured, his voice laced with amusement.

regaining your composure, you smirked, crossing your arms as best you could with his tendrils pinning you to the wall. “i think i’ll keep it… as insurance. you know, just in case you feel like getting hungry again.”

he tilted his head, his expression thoughtful. “so… what, you’re blackmailing me now?”

“exactly,” you replied, your grin widening. “you’re going to help me out with a few things, and i’m going to keep my mouth shut about your… secret.”

jay sighed, the shadows retracting as he released you, though he kept his gaze locked on yours. “fine. but don’t push it.”

you grinned, savouring the thrill of having the upper hand. “deal.”

over the next few weeks, you took full advantage of your “arrangement.” you had him running errands, fixing things around your apartment, and even carrying your heavy boxes at work. gone was the bumbling, geeky jay you’d known, replaced with someone who wielded both power and confidence—and didn’t hesitate to let you know it.

curiosity getting the best of you one day, you found yourself pulling him aside. “so… about your little… transformation,” you began, eyeing him carefully. “is he, like, a shadow monster or something?”

jay’s eyes widened, and he looked genuinely affronted. “shadow monster?” he repeated, crossing his arms. “he’s a symbiote. and he’s got a name, thank you very much.”

you raised an eyebrow. “a symbiote? i mean, he looks pretty shadowy to me.”

jay sighed, clearly unimpressed with your description. “no, he’s not ‘shadowy.’ he’s a sentient being that forms a bond with his host—me. he’s venom,” jay clarified, the name coming out almost reverently, and with a slight glint in his eye.

“oh, i see. so, he’s a person?”

“well, he has his own… opinions,” jay replied, wincing as he paused. “we’re a package deal, so to speak.”

“damn right, a package deal,” a deep, gravelly voice suddenly rumbled from within jay, and you felt a slight chill as the symbiote made its presence known.

you stared, both amazed and slightly unnerved. “oh… hey there, venom.”

venom chuckled, the sound reverberating low and menacing. “hello, sweetheart. i hear you think i’m a 'shadow monster.' "

jay rubbed the back of his neck, looking slightly exasperated, but there was a hint of amusement in his eyes as he said, “see? he doesn’t like being called that.”

you smirked, glancing at jay and then back at venom. “got it, venom,” you replied, a teasing lilt to your voice. “no shadow monster remarks. i’ll be sure to remember that.”

that evening, you called him over to help fix a squeaky window in your apartment. when he arrived, his sleeves were rolled up, and those dark tendrils emerged, forming into tools as he worked. you couldn’t help but watch, fascinated as he tightened the screws effortlessly, his movements precise and fluid.

he glanced over his shoulder, catching you staring. “see something you like, darling?” he teased, his voice low, laced with that familiar dark humour.

you scoffed, crossing your arms. “keep dreaming, park.”

jay smirked, his gaze flicking over you with a look that was anything but innocent. “oh, i don’t have to dream.”

your face heated, but before you could respond, he leaned closer, his breath warm against your ear. “you know, all you have to do is say the word.”

flustered, you quickly turned away, ignoring the smug grin on his face.

one night, as you were heading home from work, you felt someone following you. before you could react, a man grabbed your arm, yanking you into a dark alley. panic surged through you, your heart hammering as you struggled against his grip. but before you could scream, a low, guttural growl echoed from the shadows.

jay emerged from the darkness, his face twisted into a terrifying, fanged grin, his body wrapped in shadows that made him look both monstrous and mesmerising. he moved faster than you’d ever seen, dark tendrils coiling around the man’s arms, pinning him against the wall with a force that made your would-be attacker whimper.

“didn’t anyone tell you?” he snarled, his voice laced with dark satisfaction, his grin widening to show those gleaming fangs. “not to mess with what's ours.”

the man’s face turned ghostly white as he struggled against jay’s grip, terror flooding his eyes. jay’s smirk only grew, his shadowed form tightening its hold as he leaned in close, as if savouring every second of the man’s fear.

“i should just eat you,” jay’s voice growled, laced with menace and barely-concealed delight. “but you’re too pathetic for even a snack.” with a dismissive sneer, he released the man, letting him stumble away in blind terror, tripping over himself as he fled into the night.

when you looked back at jay, his inky tendrils had retracted, his monstrous form dissolving into something closer to the man you knew. yet his eyes still held that dangerous, possessive glint, and his breathing was still heavy, his gaze locked onto you with an intensity that made your pulse race.

“you okay?” he asked, his voice softer now, but with an edge of something raw and wild. his hand moved to rest on your arm, fingers lingering as if to reassure himself you were safe.

you nodded, swallowing as you tried to steady your breathing. “thanks to you…”

a wicked chuckle escaped him, his head tilting as his eyes darkened with a new, eerie glow. you could feel the presence of that “other” entity in him, lurking just beneath the surface. “oh, she’s safe with us,” it rumbled, making your skin prickle. “but i think she owes us something, don’t you, jay?”

jay’s gaze softened for a moment before that twisted smile took over again, his features shifting, the shadows flickering as he allowed his alter ego to take control.

“you really think i owe you?” you asked, trying to keep your voice steady despite the thrill that coursed through you.

“absolutely,” jay, or rather venom replied, his grin widening. “we didn’t just save you. we protected what’s ours. and i think a little… reward is in order.”

you arched an eyebrow, unwilling to back down. “and what kind of reward does a shadow monster want?”

jay leaned closer, his breath warm and tinged with something dark. “i have a few ideas.” he chuckled, his sharp fangs glinting in the low light. “but don’t worry, sweetheart. we won’t bite… unless you ask nicely.”

your cheeks flushed despite yourself, but you kept your cool. “i don’t think you’re as scary as you want me to believe,” you teased, meeting his dark gaze. “you wouldn’t hurt me.”

his eyes gleamed with amusement. “oh, i could… but where’s the fun in that?” he tilted his head, observing you with a dark curiosity. “besides… jay likes you too much. and, maybe… so do i.”

the admission left you momentarily breathless, your heart pounding as you stared up at him. just as you were about to respond, his face softened, his gaze flicking to your lips before he leaned in.

without waiting another second, jay captured your mouth in a fierce, consuming kiss. the roughness in his embrace was offset by a possessive tenderness that made you melt, your hands gripping his shirt as he pulled you closer.

when he finally pulled back, his eyes flickered between jay’s gentle warmth and venom’s dark amusement. “so, boss,” he murmured, his voice laced with that familiar, playful edge, “any other tasks?”

with a grin, you pulled him closer, “i think i can come up with a few.”

jay chuckled approvingly, his voice a husky whisper against your ear. “good… because we’re just getting started.”

and with that, he leaned in once more, his mouth claiming yours in a kiss that promised this was only the beginning of a thrilling, dangerous new game.

𝗰𝗼𝗽𝘆𝗿𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁 ©𝗴𝘆𝘂𝘂𝗯𝗲𝗿𝗿𝘆𝘆 on Tumblr

˚ · .𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝗿𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁𝘀 𝗿𝗲𝘀𝗲𝗿𝘃𝗲𝗱

[microwaving-tesilid-argente]

ora this post is so fun bc

let’s not forget that the timing on her part was entirely accidental. she didn’t really mean to prevent the dungeon sink; in fact i’m pretty sure she actually forgot about it. you’re telling me she could have been all the way back in the vinchester kingdom doing her little slice-of-life activities while tesilid’s entire life crumbled around him????? irinbi what the FUCK

and there's this line in webnovel ch 19, right before ailette goes to the vatican:

"Speaking of the protagonist, what is he doing while I'm busting my butt down here?" (...) I wonder what the young boy's life was like right now. Hopefully, he's not out there living the good life by himself."

like she Knew his life was going to get Fucked Up eventually, and she just did not care 😭 i think it didn't register for her that he was a real person who would carry that trauma for the rest of his life. and then she saw these three kids being very much kids, and like man... how can you not want them to grow up well. and then she dedicated the next 10 years of her life to protecting tesilid argente even though she never saw him again. ailette probably constantly read the original story to take notes and concoct plans and went "what the hell. you're telling me that kid i met back then will have to go through this? No."

---

also hestio thinking that ephael was joking w plan B is suchhhh a fun piece of characterisation. I love it. i love characterising hestio as the softer and More Caring One, Actually, because of this. (and the many times when hestio is the one yelling at tesilid to look after himself better.) it just never crossed his mind that ephael was serious.

and hestio did die before ephael enacted Plan B, probably because once hestio died there was even less of a chance for them to defeat the dungeon boss. which is such a fun thought, honestly, because OG!hestio died not knowing his friend was capable of this, and canon!hestio just never gets to learn about it. ephael just goes hehehaha and be his silly self the whole time without anyone knowing that he's capable of such callousness and brutality at the same time. and of his capacity for heroism as well - he doesn't have many lines and at least 2 of them are him going "nah i don't really wanna save the world... i want to leave the religious order"... and then he goes and does this at age 10. because out of everyone trapped in the dungeon, tesilid was the most capable of saving the world after surviving it and the one who most "deserved" to live. crazy. he contains multitudes. in another story he could've been a main character.

i got the second volume today 🎉 the cover color schemes are switched…….THEY MATCH……..!!!! AGGHHHHHHHH

+ obligatory plan B mention. it truly never fails to make me sick (/pos). you may notice hestio absolutely thinks he’s joking / doesn’t even consider that an option! haha! i wonder how badly it hurt tesilid to see ephael massacre innocent children all to save HIM! did hestio die first? did he die last? even worse, did he agree??? rereading this has made me reevaluate just how absolutely FUCKED tesilid’s life was from the start. how did he not break sooner. me personally if the closest people i had to friends commited a massive murder suicide for the express purpose of me being the Lone Survivor i would actually just perish on the spot.

it really messes with me that the vibe of this little arc is so chill, because we as readers know that if ailette hadn’t happened to be there, Everyone In That Dungeon Would Be Dead. let’s not forget that the timing on her part was entirely accidental. she didn’t really mean to prevent the dungeon sink; in fact i’m pretty sure she actually forgot about it. you’re telling me she could have been all the way back in the vinchester kingdom doing her little slice-of-life activities while tesilid’s entire life crumbled around him????? irinbi what the FUCK

“the day of sacrifice has taken something from me every year after that” you can’t do this to me